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#thats not enough to stop loving me right
arthurily · 2 months
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Lol I chuckle whenever ppl unironically say that arthur didn’t care that john was mauled by wolves😭 im not sure you understand their dynamic quite well… that man sat by john’s bed and didnt even allow him to get up
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malleleothreesome · 3 months
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YOUR MALLEUS POST IS JUST!!!!! AGDKFFLSVFL!!!! WHO KNOWS HOW MANY TIMES I RE-READ THAT THING BUT IT WAS WORTH THE WAIT!!!! 😫😭👌🖤💚
I'm so late to this but thank you so much Knight!! 🖤💚🖤💚 I'm so happy you enjoyed Blindfolded Malleus... I was so excited for you to read it, and I'm very happy it lived up to the hype and anticipation!!! Truly, I am so honored and grateful that you would re-read something so long 🥹 it amazes me how supportive you are!! I hope I can continue to write things that you enjoy! One day in the [regretfully] far future I swear to you that I will put out an Idia fic just for you hehehe. I'm so overwhelmed by the amount of things I am excited to write, but I guess that is a wonderful problem to have! I only wish I had more time in the day to write, but alas, such is life. Why the fUCk am I writing so formal right now daiohssadoi;hdSAO not me saying BUT ALAS. SUCH IS LIFE????? It is so.
I'm actually taking a TWELVE DAY vacation from work starting on the 22nd so I might actually do a little request event where people can send me like kink prompts or something. I think that'll be fun!
Okay and FINE I'll do some fluff prompts too for the fluff people but please don't judge my fluff too harshly, I'm still learning!!! For some reason smut just comes naturally dhaDSAHIDDASijdsan I'll start gathering some prompts and we will do a little ask game or something.
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📣 By the way FELLOW HONEST THIGH RIDING ANON if you SEE this first of all, ONCE AGAIN: I wish to express my undying devotion to you and your exceptional thought process. I am positively frothing at the mouth over your request and I am PLEASED TO ANNOUNCE I am finally making good progress and it WILL be out soon. We WILL make him cum in his pants. We WILL make him cry, whimper, and moan.
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#sorry knight i took over your ask to make a desperate PSA for my hero: fellow honest thigh riding anon#ILYSM KNIGHT THANK U FOR YOUR SUPPORT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#does my millennial show when I key smash#as someone born in 96 i am actually right on the cutoff for millennial and gen z#so i choose to identify with whoever is getting the best press at the time#just kidding im sorry gen z i can't relate to yall at all...#i still like ugg boots and my hair will forever be side parted#most of my millennial cringe comes from being a tumblr user between 2010 and 2014#it is engrained#the cool thing about getting older (young people heed my words):#i am unbully-able (and one day you will be too)#you simply cannot make me feel bad about doing things i like to do and enjoying things that make me happy#take pride in what you enjoy and don't let societal norms stop you#also you don't have to worry about getting bullied anyway because adults literally don't do that to each other#everyone in their mid 20s and beyond have learned to stop caring about what other people do for their own enjoyment#because like... lets be real... seeing and learning about what makes people happy... is super cool. the world needs more happiness#this is also a call out: if your friends or online spaces make you feel bad about your interests... gtfo of there#thats not the norm. curate your spaces for what makes you feel good!!!#your 20s are shit enough without so much negativity during the times you are supposed to be relaxed and surrounded by loved ones#this post was made by ugg boot gang#‧͙+ ̊*・༓☾ Erica Answers ☽༓・* ̊+‧͙
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taeyungie · 11 months
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hi ♡ i guess i'm back? 🥹
here's a little life update! i think you guys deserve it after my absence that lasted longer than even i expected it to last ;( i am very sorry about that. i miss everyone here and bangtan so much, you have no idea. the reason for all that is that for the past months i have been going through a lot of things and changes in my life. there were good and bad things happening, time flies extra fast, days melt into one and i didn't even notice the past half a year pass. although i think my absence was unavoidable in these circumstances i just thought that you guys deserve to know what's been up with me for the past months haha i have received a lot messages and reminders that people remember about me and that they miss me and i just want to send all of you my biggest apologies for leaving you for so long with no response, as well as all my love and gratitude! 🥺 i think i've been always fairly transparent on here so if anyone wanted to know more I'll leave some more details in the tags but basically I just hope that soon i will be able to become more active again and respond to messages ❤️❤️❤️ i hope everyone is doing great 🥰
#honestly... it was yoongi's comeback that made it happen. that made me have motivation to come back. i didnt expect it but here we are LOL#because for the past months i have been struggling a lot and i almost lost all the connections with my friends family and bangtan#i lost all my feelings and thoughts#i didnt miss anyone i didnt want to do anything i didnt want to be anywhere. i was completely submerged into my own head#i still am. it didnt exactly get better but.. its just yoongis impact jasbhdjdjd he made me remeber a lot#in october last year i developed a very agressive eating disorder and its gotten a lot worse at the begging of this year#and it has taken everything from me. it sucked me dry and still continues to do so. it made my mental health so much worse on every level#but im still here and thats what matters in the end right ❤️#from the good things - after long unfortunate and very stressful job hunting i finally got a stable job 🥰 and i continue my uni so far#that's why i was absent here most of the time. i decided to focus on my life and on trying to change something and to fight a little more#after jin's enlistment announcement... it was a wake up call for me#and maybe soon i will be back on track but im taking things slow. especially that its not easy for me at all#but i just wanted you to know that theres been a lot happening here so ❤️ im not just getting bored of tumblr and bts haha#i never stopped following the fandom i never turned off my notifications from media i never stopped looking up what they're up to each day#i just didnt have time and motivation to be active. because of my health i wanted to be quiet and away from eveyone and everything :/#even from my comfort people and activities#that sounds sad but. it's alright so please don't worry about me ❤️ I'm holding on just fine. got used to some things ❤️ trying to heal#so yeah i think thats that haha i think its enough and all basically#it may seem like very little but my life has always been very slow when it comes to big actions haha#anyway. love you all so much ❤️ thank you for not forgetting about me ❤️#soon i will try to answer some mesdages from my inbox. please wait for me just a little bit more ❤️ im very overworked right now#but im so sorry that you have to wait so long ❤️
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possiblytracker · 10 months
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damn. i really thought i already had the "youre probably never going to see any of your uni friends again after you move out this really and truly is the end of the most vibrant and healthy irl social life youve ever had. and likely will ever have again" breakdown done and shelved but i spent today hanging out with a few friends from my course who are leaving this week to say goodbye and i dont. know how to process it completely. im trying to make the most of everything while im still here but every interaction feels so bittersweet it's genuinely gnawing at me
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ankhisms · 7 months
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i dont want to be brave about it all any more i want to scream and cry but i must continue on somehow
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strwbrymlkshake · 1 year
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Why can't I be satisfied with everything? It needs to be perfect to me and I can't accept anything otherwise :(
#mine#oh boy here we go. guy last post was about has been pretty cool and i got flustered around him a few times#but i feel bad bc. i need m o r e he isnt insane enough he isnt making me go absolutely crazy i want to be satisfied but im NOT im sorry#like its quite honestly the most attention acceptance etc ive gotten but its not ENOUGH he doesnt die whenever i send a selfie#im never satisfied WHY i have unrealistic expectations !!!! i hate my brain killing and violence and death etc#i get crushes on guys who want nothing to do with me but then when one actually wants me its not enough? what is wrong with me#thrill of the chase? i cant accept being loved? what is it brain. christ almighty. im not doing anything like deliberately yandere related#anymore im just being generally incomprehensibly mentally ill 🙄 still trying to find a therapist but idk how on earth ill explain that#ill update this post tomorrow with more insanity but for now i am the sleepy tired#// ok its now 3 days later i dont feel like making another post. i think i was just having a mental illness moment as always#because he does make me insane. hashtag girl. im trying to be the smartest and calculated i have ever been with a relationship in my life#like im thinkin about it so hard bro. the future n shit. how would this relationship go. im so scared ill do something wrong its preventing#me from doing things RIGHT. im sad becaude i flipped out today over even imagining him being upset with me a little#so i was really embarrassed and it put me in a weird mood for the rest of the night but he reassured me he doesnt hate me or want me to die#every one aaalways says theyre different. i can only hope this one is telling the truth. i dont know what ill do if he isnt.#well i need to stop whining about fictional scenarios and focus on the good stuff in reality. i get along with him very well and he#is very niceys to me :3 he doesnt think im fucking insane or stupid for overreacting. i feel very comfortable gossiping and talking w him#every long time blog viewer of mine reading this like ah shit here we go again#but thats what im here for. i guess. just have to keep doing this shit until something good finally happens to me romantically hngh#i feel so strange because i have wanted and yearned for a relationship but now that i actually could have one im like WAIT#I DIDNT THINK ID GET THIS FAR 💀💀💀 bruh. and he doesnt even think im stupid hes respectful to me he checks in on me all the time#like perhaps the only person to ever actually almost match my energy in a romantic sense. there was [redacted] i guess but he didnt love me#he listens to me talk about my problems he doesnt think i complain or overreact too much. all the ridiculous cringe shit i do#he doesnt mind it. its nice to be able to be myself. and im really proud of myself for not rushing into a relationship right away
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lilacponds · 1 year
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sometimes i think im too chronically online and then i see some opinions around and im like
takes drag from cigarette
im too old for this
#i dont know the right term for this but.#im so tired of the concept that people cannot be allowed to grow and learn from their mistakes#sometimes im tempted to throw all my dirty laundry out here just to see who sticks around?#like i grew up in a toxic environment with shitty bigoted ideas. of course growing up i internalized a lot of them#i was unhealthy and i was toxic and all i can hope for is that there isnt anything i havent weeded out inside of me#but i was growing up. i didnt know better. people sometimes just Dont Know Better#and of course no one HAS to forgive someone thats hurt them#but people cant as a society disregard that people CAN learn and grow from their mistakes#and become better people#and that theyre not the people that they used to be when they were 13 or 16 or even 20 if theyre older than that#human beings are in constant state of change#idk im too tired to get into cancel culture and purity culture#and my brain just took a pit stop at the discourse of prison rehabilitation somewhere in there but im not knowledgeable enough to park there#cause thats not what im talking about. but i feel like better people than me would make that connection in a smart way too#and NO this isnt about serial killers or rapists or abusers for the love of god. have some critical thinking skills#theres some discussion about ethics and empathy to be had but im not touching that even with a 7ft pole#THIS IS NOT A CALL FOR DISCOURSE. LEAVE ME BE. ITS JUST VENTING#Charlie chatters
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sketchbookwonders · 10 months
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opens-up-4-nobody · 1 year
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...
#theres a quote somewhere abt an adviser of a religious leader in... maybe the middle ages? where the adviser is like: we need to convert X#group of people gently. if we force our beliefs down their throats they may just expell it back up#and im thinking abt it bc thats how my brain engages with things. like: oh i like a thing. i must consume as much info abt it as possible#right this very fucking second. and then suddenly its very stressful and my brain tries to reject it#but i cant bc the fucking metaphorical evangelical in my brain is like: no. u fucking listen to me#and im just like 😵‍💫#which is to say that i didnt sleep much last night and overdosed on 0ne piece. which was not a good move bc now i just feel terrible#which i knew would happen bc i was like hm reading this fic sounds like a bad choice. lets fucking gooooo#and then i fucking trigger myself lmao. partly bc of the material in the fic and partially bc the last time i was reading 0ne piece fics i#was a lot more fucked in terms of my lack of self awareness. so it kinda inherently makes me think of back then and im like oh yea i used#to do X bad thing. i should go back to doing that lol. and its like No. stop. fucking. no#make better choices for the love of god. ugh fuck ive got too much i didnt sleep enough energy#im sure ill burn out way hard by the end of the day. channel that energy. channel that energy into finding an apartment in a fucking city#with a fucking housing shortage 😭 i dont wanna go back to having roommates. nooooooooo 😭😭😭#bleh. im procrastinating going to work. work that i am voluntarily doing for no fucking reason except thst i have issues with#compulsive behavior lol. not lol. sad face 😭 hhhh im vibrating. i wanna run around in circles. why cant i be like this when i actually go#for runs >:-[ im always to fucking brain saturated by then and its a ll static and bees in my head#whatever. time to get tf up and take measurements#unrelated#lmao y did i start this with allusions to a religious quote i dont fucking remember hahahaha#ah its bc i find the contrast of serious academic and philosophical topics funny when i go from thinking abt them to fucking anime and#my petty bullshit. idk i habe a weird sense of humor maybe
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isdalinarhot · 1 year
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for most mountain goats alpha couple songs when im making the sadalinar amv in my head while listening to it im mentally substituting references to modern day things with a rough roshar equivalent but see america right in my head actually is dalinar drunk on a greyhound bus in florida
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Idk… i’m trying so hard to speak up for myself in relationships now, and when something is not ok with me I know I shouldn’t just settle for it like I used to. It’s just so hard though… because when I love someone I would go to the ends of the earth for them. But when they don’t do the same for me it takes me a while to realize it and to realize that I actually do deserve someone who would do that for me as well. And it doesn’t even have to be big things. Sometimes it’s the little things they do (or don’t do) that tells you a lot. Then when I try to do something about it, I feel like the most evilest person on planet earth because maybe I really don’t deserve as much as I think I do…. Maybe I’m asking for too much… Maybe they’re actually doing their best… Maybe I’m ruining everything and should just be glad that anyone is interested in me at all.
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todayisafridaynight · 10 months
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YEAH........... YEAH..... LIKEWISE, NO NOTES AT ALL, THAT'S EXACTLY IT... Main antagonist deaths are often treated as "comeuppance," but that would be the ultimate comeuppance for Aoki. As it stands, the only people who actually suffer for it are Ichiban and Jo, and Ichi didn't even do anything wrong. Also please I'm positive there's more to wring out of Aoki and Jo for an essay 😭😭at the very least, I always love to hear your perspective!
"he'd made a social circle for himself where people predominantly liked him for the power and influence" <- incredibly Mine-core of Aoki btw (I also feel the rest applies a little in terms of Mine probably being very quick to write off people who Do care about him as not caring about him, as with Katase, but it's nowhere near the extent of the Arakawas)
Wait actually it's kind of funny... for both Mine and Aoki, I was so sure their endings would go a certain way. Mine and Kiryu'd fight Richardson off together and Ichi'd, I don't know, shield Aoki or hug him so Kume couldn't get to him in the first place, or after that INSANE direct parallel to Arakawa running to the hospital with Masato, he'd miraculously pull through like he did on New Year's. Tormented with visions of the better timeline... With Aoki in particular, it makes me want to tear my hair out because the moment of him choosing to put the gun in the locker was REVOLUTIONARY for the series, looking at the characters he was most heavily based on.
Anyway. Bottom line. These bitches need to hug it out. It was so evil Arakawa didn't hug Ichi at Omi HQ or on the waterfront like bro stop being """manly""" for five seconds you're ruining my life you're ruining your own lives
There'd genuinely be nothing more painful yet more satisfying for an antagonist than being confronted with the consequences of their actions and having to navigate life after having making those decisions, ESPECIALLY when it comes to mending the bonds that- for anyone else- would have shattered long ago. With Aoki being motivated by the want to be loved and appreciated for himself, it would've been nice to see him finally acknowledge that he did have that love and start to better himself as a result (however much he'd be able to while in prison anyway lmao).
The Mine and Aoki comparisons are so real though, I remember joking to myself about it days after beating the game but it just fuels my mental illness every time I think about it ☠️ I LEGALLY AM NOT ALLOWED TO GO OFF ABOUT THE Y7 ENDING I'VE DONE IT TOO MUCH it makes me so mad every time I think about it 😭 ESPECIALLY THE PARALLELS WITH ARAKAWA AND THE LOCKERS UGGGHHH IT COULD HAVE BEEN SUCH AN EPIC CONCLUSION WITH THAT... Arakawa running from the lockers at the start of Aoki's life compared to Ichiban running from the lockers and getting Aoki to the hospital so Aoki can restart life I'm Going To Kill Someone (myself) (in Minecraft)
#snap chats#theres a note here about aoki's self hatred and ergo his inability to believe people could love him without 'worth'#and some kind of. I Dont Know occurs that comes with aoki accepting that love and ergo At Least Tolerating himself#and again becoming better as a person as a result. not WHOLLY you cant undo Everything Wrong With Him with one therapy session#but itd at least be a start and thats far more than anything else rgg has given since like. ryuji in dead souls#but w/e i- as per usual- have the vocabulary of a walrus so we're just gonna have to imagine i said something profound#AND THE LACK OF HUGGING IN THIS FRANCHISE IM GOING TO STAB ALL OF YOU. IN MINECRAFT.#with the power of delusions and this like seven-year-old wacom tablet i can fix that......#it'll never be enough it'll never fill the void in my soul but it'll be something i guess#BUT UGH NO SORRY IM JUST MAD NOW#nothing in my life has ever genuinely triggered anger in me than the y7 ending its just soooooooOOOOO#IT WAS SOOO CLOSE TO BEING PERFECT I CANT#im going to give myself a blood clot thinking about it anymore i feel my heart stopping Do Not Call An Ambulance I Cannot Afford It#so to stop myself from going in any more debt than i already am..... the possibility of any essays from me are very small#my ability to use words is near non existent. i feel like a right ninny sometimes#in any case im not sure what else i could expand on that isn't restating what you've said#cant ever be upset with bein on the same wavelength tho it gives my inarticulate ass a helluva easier time trying to explain LMAO#plus im petrified of trying to interpret anything from the english dub or english subs#and looking into language use is Very Much important when dissecting abusive relationships#i guess there's always just talking about general actions committed and not inspecting the exact words used#idk.. at the very least ill rotate the concept in my head and then fend off the urge to eat my teeth#i'm gonna throw up.... im still thinking of it........ gonna make an unrelated-but-arguably-related post in like three seconds#dont look at it its cringe
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bnuyy · 2 years
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🍉. . .
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#sometimes realizing you no longer like someone when theyre now far away is much too difficult to accept#it surprises me how much of the love i had for friends simply came undone and vanished the moment we parted ways#its a strange feeling. to stop loving someone#to grow indifferent to their lives#i think it bears a heavier feeling in my heart than having followed on opposite paths due to anger or misunderstanding#indifference always plays a role on how significant it is to suddenly now be insignificant to someone else#or to see a (once) loved one as more than just. one that exists#it hurts to know that i was probably not built for long term love#maybe there is something wrong with that statement#or maybe not#but its still strange at how this hollowness gnaws at me#why should i feel bad for something that isnt there anymore#i think maybe thats not really the right question#i think that. its not the mourning of what you lost#but of what you once held so dearly and now doesnt even seem to be able to grasp - no matter how hard you try#its not the item itself you mourn for#but the clear off-putting feeling of its absence through the memories of its presence in the past#like when something gathers up enough dust on a shelf#and once you take it out theres a mark of where it used to be#the only part of the shelf untouched by the layers of dust#now open to be filled again - yet never again with the same thing#i honestly dont know how to express this#ive just been thinking a Lot about this recently#maybe a couple of weeks by now#maybe it was proximity the only thing that held us together#and maybe it was our opposite thinking that entertained us#but did not necessarily mean we were friends because we liked each other or the knowledge we had available to share#maybe the proximity and every day life rotine just made ourselves relatable to one another. and that made a sort of connection#and there is still love in whatever this is#but the likeness of it all was just simply gone the minute they left
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avoiltaire · 2 years
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felix, prince series, aggie.io with stylus & chromebook, a few hours i guess
april 7
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