#that took a long time

[tswwwit]

Here's the finale of Bill vs Bill! I hope you all enjoy, and thanks for reading! Parts One, Two, and Three are on their respective links.

Careful, this one's a long one!

Dipper flinches with a start. “Ow.” Then, wincing, trying to twist away. “Ow.” 

“Nice try.” Bill’s relentless in his pursuit, and far too close to avoid “You’re not getting away.” 

“It sucks.” Dipper leans back, as much as he’s able. 

Bill lifts an eyebrow, and two fingers full of goop. He wags them in Dipper’s vision. “I did not put in the effort to conjure this,” He hisses, “Just for you to complain.”

“What even is this?” Dipper tries to gesture upwards. The sling stops his hand. 

“Would you quit moving for a second?” Bill looks like he wants to smack Dipper’s hand again. He scrunches his face up as he pushes it, slowly, down. “Seriously, you’re a shitty patient.”

“Is this pus?” Dipper moves his head to the side as Bill tries to smear more weird goop on his face. “It smells terrible.” And stings, badly.

“You smell terrible,” Bill mutters, and wipes it on him anyway.

Far from his best retort. Hell, Dipper doesn’t have a good rejoinder, it’s so bad. He can’t help but note that Bill didn’t answer his question. 

Though he has to admit. As the yellow-greenish goop does its thing, his face feels a little better. Kind of cool, and soothing.

He settles down, and lets it happen.

Being the subject of Bill’s not-so-tender attentions isn’t new. Dipper’s had a couple of screwups, and Bill’s proven more than capable of stitching up a cut. ‘Gentle’ is the least accurate description of his care, but he’s efficient. A demon, bringing all his knowledge about messing up human anatomy to bear. Albeit in the reverse direction. 

Dipper flexes his fingers. He does feel better now that his wrist’s splinted, but it’s annoying only having one hand.

Bill patching him up is typical - but the arm sling is overkill. It’s in the typical black-and-yellow pattern., and Bill whipped it out of nowhere, in the same way he snapped his fingers and created face-goo out of the ether. 

And Bill being able to summon things out of literally thin air, including this paste of… whatever it is. 

That is new. 

Well. Not totally. Every trick in the book is Bill’s to play with, as long as they’re in the Mindscape, where he can summon up furniture, visions, sounds. Manipulating the very existence around him. 

They’re not in the Mindscape now.

Instead, they’re sitting across from each other in the forest. There’s birdsong - though that’s gone quiet - and carpet of pine needles. The sky has normal wind and typical clouds, and the trees only move like normal, woody plants.

Dipper shifts uncomfortably on a newly-manifested chair. Bill leaning forward on his own, face screwed up in concentration as he continues to plaster Dipper's face with presumably medicinal goo.

And it’s. Weird. 

Seeing Bill use his power in reality is like…  seeing a teacher out of the classroom. Or an old acquaintance, in a new town. Something known, yet distinctly out of place.

As Bill finally leans back, apparently satisfied, Dipper pats at his face to wipe it off. No use; apparently it’s already soaked in.  

Cool, an unknown substance. Absorbed into him. Dipper makes a face.

“Quit complaining.” This time Bill does smack Dipper’s hand down, though it’s the uninjured one. “It’s the best I can patch you up after that guy got his hands on you.” He glances, up and down. A brief smirk. “But hey! All your organs are still on the inside!”

Dipper smacks Bill back, but not hard. He’s not sure what to say.

After everything that happened, minutes ago - Dipper’s relieved that it wasn’t worse, irrational as that sounds. He knows how Bill is. What a Bill can do. He was almost getting comfortable again.

Bill making comments like that isn’t helping.

“I hate when some imbecile thinks he can mess up my stuff.” Bill casts a glance into the woods, eye narrowed. “Someone’s gonna pay for damages.”

Dipper doesn’t comment. There’s no point.

Arrogance, possessiveness. Wanting control. They’re universal parts of every Bill, and certain lines have been blatantly, offensively crossed.

A demonic confrontation is going to happen. And soon. 

While Bill having all his powers is weird - it’s not technically a problem. There’s a contract and everything. Powered or not, Bill has several major reasons not to try and snap reality’s spine over his knee. 

Not everyone has those hangups. 

Dipper sits up more, glancing over that arc of broken branches in the forest. Then around, at the daylit clearing. 

With Bill right next to him - his Bill - Dipper can’t tell where the Other one is. The signal from the bond is either too faint compared to the real deal, right next to him - or gone completely. He’s not the only Bill whose power has returned, and the Other one could be - 

“Right.“ Dipper surges to his feet, though Bill gives him a quizzical look. “Let’s get moving.”

Bill snags him by the waistband as he strides past, stopping Dipper in his tracks with a jolt. “Where do you think you’re going?”

“To find the other guy?” Dipper gives his husband a confused look. “Maybe you haven’t noticed, but there’s another Bill Cipher around, who just got like, all his abilities back?” He tries to wrest himself away, but his Bill’s strong, too. “We have to -”

“Yeah, yeah. One, you’re not going anywhere. “ Bill snorts, tugging him closer.  “And two - neither is that guy.” A smirk, sharp and pleased. “He doesn’t have a choice.”

Wait, that doesn’t - 

Dipper stops pulling. “What?”

“I told you that wasn’t a big deal, kid.” Bill gestures vaguely at the rift, dismissive. “Real tiny, y’know? We’re not talking a whole planet’s worth of reality warping. Not even a city. I’d say it’s about…” Bill snaps his fingers, and a small picture of the woods comes up, a semi-transparent map  - and he draws a long circle over the area. “This far.”

Dipper shuffles backwards to take a glance at it. 

The area Bill’s circled is… big, sort of. Larger than Dipper would like, but not anywhere near encompassing all of reality. 

One positive thing, at least. Other Bill won’t be overpowered, beyond a certain distance. Reality has a papercut, it’s not wounded enough to let him get away with anything-

Wait.

Dipper blinks, reeling on Bill. “What about you?”

Reality has rules, and while they’re not fully broken - Bill’s not in a body. Not physically existing; he’s in a strange shift of his true form. 

“I’d be outta here, so what? It’s not like you can’t get to the Mindscape.” Bill responds easily. Though at Dipper’s glare, he sighs, annoyed. “I’d like to get that body back. But hey, worse comes to worst,” He shrugs, nonchalant. “You can always make a new one!”

True, Dipper could. He’s done it before, on accident that first time - but it would be a pain. Mostly for Bill. 

So if he’s going to pretend that’s fine? Then fine! It’s totally fine. Nothing wrong at all.

Dipper moves on. “He could still wreak havoc in town.” He folds his arms - well, arm - over his chest. A few acts of arson are well within Other Bill’s limited capabilities. “If you can’t get out of here, then I should go.”

“You’re not getting out of my sight.” Bill snaps, annoyance plain. “And I don’t give a shit about your stupid town.” 

“But I do,” Dipper insists. Just because Bill doesn’t care doesn’t mean it’s not important. 

“Kid. Pine Tree. Sapling.” Bill runs a hand down his face. Frustration furrows his brow. “For once, this isn’t about you.”

Dipper gives his husband an offended look. He’s not being arrogant, he’s concerned - 

“Believe it or not,” Bill continues over the skepticism. He draws a finger back, and flicks something invisible along that broken arc in the treeline. “He’s not gonna break what you give a shit about.”

“Oh.” Dipper clears his throat, suddenly feeling weird and, and… Now, mostly awkward. “Okay.”

The Bills bickered a little when they met, sure. In a genuinely unfriendly way; Dipper could tell by how it was semi-friendly on the surface.

Until his Bill got angry.

Dipper knows demon culture, sort of. He can’t imagine being flicked away - like a bug - is anything short of a severe ‘fuck you’. 

With ‘insignificant’ implied, to boot.

After that insult, there’s no way Other Bill’s not furious. 

But Bill’s right. He’s not mad at mortals in general, or the town of Gravity Falls. Or even at Dipper himself. This time, unlike the other monsters they’ve faced, the fury of their opponent is focused directly on - 

Bill leans back, smug as anything. “I’m always right.” He tucks his arms behind his head, inordinately pleased. 

Guess being the target of a kind of… self-recrimination doesn’t bother him. Dipper’s not sure he’s ever experienced any. 

The incoming vengeance is going to be specifically targeted. One hundred percent for Bill, and focused on the things he does give a shit about.

Nervousness flutters in Dipper’s stomach. He rubs a thumb against the opposite index finger, and glances at Bill. 

Who hasn’t let go. His grip is tight on Dipper’s waistband. It hasn’t changed position, aside from not-so-subtlely pulling Dipper closer. 

Though his fingers have started sneaking underneath the second layer of fabric. 

“Is this really the time?”

“You’re practically dead on your feet, Pine Tree.” Bill tuts, releasing him with a wave. Only to start patting his lap invitingly. “Why not take a seat and relax?”

“Why don’t you get up?” 

“Why don’t-? Ugh.” Bill sticks his tongue out. “Yeah, yeah, just a sec.” He stretches his arms up, and behind, then lets them drop. He huffs out a breath, glaring into space.

Kind of strange. Even for Bill. 

He’s…. not being lazy, exactly. Not being reluctant, either. If it was either of those, he’d complain more before he moved to stand. Dipper frowns in thought. 

Something’s off. Something new.

Putting a finger on what that is takes a moment. 

It’s not that Bill’s in a bad mood. He’s bothered, but not to the point of being contrary. It’s not that he’s hurt either; he was in perfect shape before he shifted forms. The only thing of note is that he’s a little slower in his motions. Not just when he was handling Dipper, either; it's affecting his general movement.

When Bill stands, he braces himself on the arm of his chair. Not leaping to his feet. No bounce of pride, or bright exclamation. It’s like he’s low on -

Dipper darts a look towards the rift, and back again.

Energy.

Bill cracks something in his lower back, and makes a face.

Dipper’s seen Bill in a lot of states - angry, happy, frustrated, even emotionally drained - 

But he’s never seen him tired before.

“Uh. Actually, I could use a break.” Dipper coughs into his fist. He shifts from foot to foot. “And my leg kind of hurts. So-”

A second later, Dipper finds himself perched astride Bill’s lap as he beams with pride. Glad he could get his human right where he wanted him. 

Dipper resigns himself to it after a moment. He still glares.

Noticing something off about Bill was hard enough. That happened so fast he’s doubting if it was right. 

“See? Was that so hard?” Bill shakes his head at this foolish young mortal, patting Dipper on the side. “Ease up about it.” His arm wraps around Dipper’s waist. “He and I are just gonna chat!”

When Bill says ‘chat’, his actual meaning is, ‘enacting furious vengeance’. 

For shoving him out of his realm. For trying to steal said realm. Maybe even a little for what Other Bill did while he was here.

“Fine.” Dipper lets the good side of his face rest on Bill’s shoulder.  “I guess I can wait.”

One Bill, unable to use his infinite power, except in a small radius. One not able to exist outside it, since reality’s not broken enough to make space for his weird, triangular self.

It’s all going to go down here. 

A small clearing in the forest. Barely notable. It’s in the middle of nowhere, even for the woods in Gravity Falls. Hardly the place for a showdown.

At least they’re far enough away from anywhere populated, when things get…. Unpleasant. When Bill’s involved, that’s kind of an understatement, and this is, quite literally, two times worse.

Dipper shifts, somewhat awkward, in Bill’s lap. 

If he’s going to say something, it has to be before all of it starts. So he says it. 

“Should I even be here?”

“Of course!” Bill seems surprised he asked. He pats Dipper on the side, grinning wider. “Beating yourself up without an audience is just introspection.” 

That’s… 

Yep. Exactly how Bill would think of it. Likely he wants Dipper there to witness the beatdown, too. Showing off how ‘cool’ he is.

…That might not be too bad. 

Dipper thunks his head against Bill’s shoulder, and listens to him chuckle.

Bill’s chest moves as he breathes. A beat, somewhere underneath that solid flesh. A touch firmly running up Dipper’s thigh, then back down to the knee, prodding it cautiously in a couple places. Warm, and comforting. Dipper feels parts of his back loosen up; he didn’t realize how tense he was until he wasn’t.

It doesn’t feel like preparing for battle. Whatever shape that thing’s going to take. But. Like. Relaxing’s fine. Right? It’s… helping Bill somewhat recoup all that power he spent, before the inevitable.

They already have to wait, and besides. Dipper can’t escape now. He might as well enjoy it.

Bill lazily pets his hair, humming a pleased tune to himself. An urge to argue about it flickers in Dipper out of habit, but he’s not really feeling it. He could bring up the whole ‘tore a wound into reality’ thing, since it’s definitely an asshole move - But considering the alternative, it seems stupid to complain.

Dipper opens an eye. 

Though there is still a wound in the universe. 

The color of light is disconcerting. The space-non-space it seems to occupy, even more so. 

It’s also making the grass nearby crinkle up, turn into stone, and grow into increasingly disturbing shapes. Each individual blade, crafting its own sculpture.

“So, uh,” Dipper clears his throat. “About that.”

“Hm?” Bill glances over. Almost like he’d forgotten about it. He shrugs it off, amused. “Boy, are you worried! Easy, kid, reality’ll heal up just fine.” He thinks for a second, then admits. “Mostly fine.”

Slightly ominous - so barely dangerous, as far as Bill-stuff goes. 

Not really what Dipper was asking, either.

“No, I mean - What’s it like?” At Bill’s raised eyebrow, Dipper gestures towards the rift. “Over there.”

A whole other dimension. An entirely different reality. 

“Wondered when you’d start on that. Took you long enough.” Bill nudges Dipper under the chin. “I knew you couldn’t leave a mystery hanging.”

Dipper slugs him in the shoulder with his good arm, and Bill starts laughing.

Of course he’s asking. Getting more information is key to solving this…. Bill situation. Billuation, Mabel would probably call it. There are many practical reasons to ask. Sating some curiosity is…

Okay. Also why he’s asking. 

Really, anyone would. Most people just don’t get the opportunity. 

“Shut up.” The words don’t have any heat behind them. Dipper lets his palm rest on Bill’s chest, feeling it shake with his laughter. “Tell me about it?”

Bill hums for a second, as he pretends to consider the request. Another prompting swat makes him grin.

“Eh, besides the renovations the other guy did? Not much to say about the place.” Bill makes a ‘pfft’ sound. Genuinely looking unimpressed. “Pretty bog-standard semi-parallel, no magic, with some epigoni on the basic alternate template. Real low variation outside of the-”

“Hold on a second.” Dipper interrupts. He sits up, bracing himself with the palm on Bill’s chest. “No magic?” 

“Mh,” Bill makes a face, and kind of ‘iffy’ gesture. “Maybe a few pockets here and there, but otherwise? Total dead zone.” He sticks out his tongue, blowing a raspberry. “I gotta hand it to the other guy, he did that place a favor! One hell of a dull dimension.”

Dipper just. Stares at him for a moment.

A magicless world is something straight out of a sci-fi novel, and Bill talks about it like it’s boring.

But Bill truly does think it’s mundane. Of all the worlds he’s seen in his eternal life, that one barely registers on his weirdness scale.

Goddamn it. Infinite beings are spoiled as hell for information.

So. Maybe Dipper scoots a little closer in Bill’s lap. If he strokes some of Bill’s hair back into place, it’s for convincing’s sake. “Tell me more.”

And Bill perks up, as he always does when Dipper shows interest in an obscure topic.

“Alright, alright.” He’s pleased now, though he tries to hide it. “Since you insist!”

Like he wasn’t waiting for a chance to ramble on and on about the damn thing anyway. Dipper settles down to listen.

Bill can go on, and on, and on about almost any topic. Right now, he seems pleased enough to have an attentive mortal in his lap, and to lecture about how much magicless worlds are sucky, boring, and shit.

The Bill of that universe mentioned parts of it, involuntarily. Nothing he gave away mentioned the lack of magic, or even a quarter of the things that Bill’s talking about.

Like how if it’s a parallel dimension, then there are things in common. 

Like how there’s a Bill in each place. 

Bill’s still rambling onward - something about how cars work without magic - while he conveniently avoids any topic that might be critically important.

Dipper starts frowning. 

And there’s a Gravity Falls in each place, too. Because Other Bill wasn’t surprised about where he ended up, only what it was like. 

And come to think of it, he called Dipper ‘Pine Tree’ too - then was surprised how different he was from -

Dipper smacks a hand over Bill’s mouth. Suddenly alert.

Bill stops in his ramble, blinking in surprise. He starts to speak, but Dipper pats his palm over his face in rapid taps, so he can’t grab on and lick it.

Same things. Different places.

And some of the same people.

Oh god, there's another Dipper somewhere, and that'd be weird enough - But it gets even weirder.

Dipper was already pretty sure that Bill couldn’t create that dimensional rift on his own. Even Other Bill couldn’t do things himself, he mentioned that it would take a native, and the person Other Bill thought was great at dimensions was -

“Ford?” Dipper lets his hand drop, meeting Bill’s eye. “Really?” 

Bill blinks. A beat of hesitation - “Sure, there’s a Ford!” He shrugs, grinning again. “But I thought you’d wanna hear more about-”

“Oh, we’ll get to that later.” Dipper insists. If Bill didn’t mention Other Dipper, he’s not sure he wants to know - but this, he has to ask.  “You worked with Other Ford?”

 Bill tilts his head back, eye shut. Mouth shut, too, like he’s tasted something unpleasant.

Oh shit. Dipper’s right.

“You,” Bill states, rubbing his eye. “Have an unerring knack for finding the parts I don’t wanna reminisce on, and going right for the gut.” He peeks at Dipper wryly. “It’s almost sadistic.”

Another distraction. Dipper moves on without pause. “How did that work?” 

He can’t imagine they’re on better terms there. Marriage to a nephew is a far cry from an apocalypse. 

“Wasn’t that hard.” Bill shrugs. Slightly annoyed from being found out.  “When I found the guy, he was a sentient statue being used as a hood ornament.” He smirks. Probably thinking about how great that was - then flicks his fingers, dismissing the idea. “But when you re-fleshify someone, they get a lot more amiable!”

That kind of tracks. 

If Other Ford is anything like his Ford, that might win some favor. But a Bill is still a Bill, and Ford’s not exactly thrilled with him at the best of times.

“And I may have added a bribe,” Bill adds, seeing the skepticism. “‘Enemy of my enemy might as well do my bidding’, y’know? That guy coulda spent decades trying to get revenge - and he'd still fail.” Bill rests a hand on his chest, smirking with pride. “Whereas I am plenty capable of handing someone their own exoskeleton.”

“Okay, yeah.” Dipper can’t argue with that.. “I see how that worked.”

An enemy. One that’s almost impossible to destroy. Impossible to prevent. Impossible to do anything to, no matter how hard you try. You really could spend decades on it and get nowhere. Something both Fords have in common.

But meeting an equally powerful being, one who’s just as furious at him as you are? 

This Bill might be an asshole, but he’s not the same asshole. Ford’s practical enough to work with that.

Throw in the de-statuing - whatever that entails - and convincing Other Ford must have been a relative cakewalk. 

Likely there were other problems, and complications. But hell knows Bill’s not going to cop to them, so. Dipper will save that mystery for later.

“In any case, the whole thing went pretty quick once I hijacked the other me’s setup.” Bill glances off into the woods with annoyance. “He’d had this little plan in the works for a while.”

Eternal. Immortal. How long is a ‘while’ for a Bill? 

Dipper shuffles in place. “That’s disturbing.”

“Nah, that’s normal! I might not have a lotta long term things going on at the moment,” Bill gives Dipper an amused look. “But I’ve had a pretty weird time recently.” 

Dipper feels his face warm at the indirect compliment. He smacks his husband, just gently, on the cheek.

A compliment - and a distraction, too. Bill might be happy to provide Dipper with surface information, but he doesn’t like him prying into the deeper bits. 

There’s more going on here. Something deep under the surface of this convoluted, fucked up switch.

Because Other Bill did this for a reason.

A lot of things are ‘easy’ when you have a lot of power, but a universal switch is normally ‘impossible’. In that it comes with an almost impossible price tag. One that could be paid, by someone like Bill - but one he couldn’t avoid, either. Hauling that amount of metaphysical weight anywhere has a toll, simply due to its heft.

Other Bill didn’t do this on a whim, and he didn’t do it without a cost. 

He had to build an entire setup of some kind; a spell or a mechanism to give him the leverage to manage. Putting in thought, and power, and… whatever the triangle equivalent of sweat is. This switching bullshit isn’t simple for any being, anywhere.

And a Bill wouldn’t put in real effort unless it came with real results. 

“A long term plan for…” Dipper rolls his hand, trying to urge Bill on. No response is forthcoming. “What did he want?”

Bill shrugs. He’s still looking into the woods. “I got an idea of what he was after, sure.” 

Dipper waits, but there’s not a followup. “And what was that?”

“I checked the specifics myself. Every bit of that magic..” Bill looks nonchalant, in that way that means he’s bothered. He’s not smiling so much. “It shoulda worked. ”

“So…  it didn’t?” Dipper prompts.

Bill, typically unhelpful, hasn’t directly answered the question. He merely shrugs.

After a moment, he hasn’t added anything either, so Dipper keeps guessing. “Was it about, uh.” He smiles, super awkwardly. The word’s so rarely said it feels strange. “Us?”

“Pfft, no chance!” Bill waves that off, smile rising again. “Didn’t know about our situation, for one. And hey, even before I showed up, he wasn’t having a good time!” He grins for a second, before his contemplative look returns. “Weird that he hasn’t backed off, though.”

“Wow.” Dipper says. Imagine that, a Bill Cipher being stubborn. “What a surprise.”

“Exactly! Meeting you shoulda been hint number one that things had gone pear-shaped.” Bill crosses his arms over his chest. “If I tried changing universes and ended up hitched to some random being,” He jerks his thumb over his shoulder, grimacing. “I’d cut my losses and bail, first thing.”

“Well, yeah, you’re…” Married, Dipper was about to say. Smarter, he’s tempted to say. But - 

“Wait.” Dipper pulls himself out of Bill’s lap, standing up straight.

Realization hits him like a bolt in the chest, and he glances at his husband. 

His husband, which is a whole other level of - 

Dipper stands still, and stares. Even though Bill’s giving him a weird look. “You’re different.”

“Two roads diverged, and all, yeah.” Bill’s not impressed, he waves it off. “But that wasn’t so far down the path, as these things go.”

Not so far down it, but pretty far away from each other. 

Bills pretend that they can’t make mistakes. That their judgment is perfect.

His Bill has had to say otherwise. Multiple times, in fact. 

Compromise is what they built their marriage on, mistakes are how they met. In this universe, Bill Cipher can’t always have things his way. He complains about it, he struggles with it, and it’s an uphill battle - But he’s clever, and resourceful, and he’s learned a few new tricks to cope. 

Over time, his Bill’s gained a mild tolerance to fucking up.

One time he even admitted he did, directly. Dipper keeps that image, melted as it is, close to his heart.

Any other Bill, though… 

“It’s not that it didn’t work.” Dipper speaks up, and watches Bill tilt his head, curious - “It’s that it couldn’t work.” 

Bill sits upright, attention caught - and Dipper starts pacing, mind working fast. He knows Bill, and he has the clues, he just has to put them together-

Right. 

“It’s all about differences.” Dipper almost smacks a hand against his other one before thinking better of it. “He told me he was after novelty, but the first thing he did when he got here was exactly what he did in his dimension.” He waves over the woods. “Just… Come in, take over, and have fun.” 

“Not seeing the problem-”

“But that’s just it.” Dipper insists. Bill blinks at him. “It’s the same thing.” He snaps his fingers a couple times, looking for a metaphor. “Like… he’s going to different restaurants, but ordering the same dish every time.” 

Bill smiles, smacking his knee. “Ha! Trying the same thing, and expecting different results.” He tilts his head in acknowledgment. ”That is one of the definitions of insanity.”

“Exactly!” Dipper smiles, and throws one arm out. “He set all of this up because he wanted something different.” He clenches his fist. That’s it,  the ‘why’ at the core of it - and its intrinsic flaw. “But things can’t change until he does.” 

Bill nods, once. Without interrupting, which means Dipper has a good point. 

Dipper puffs his chest out a bit in pride. He is smart, Bill likes that; he figured out why the plan failed without even knowing what it was.

“He could go anywhere, and still never get what he wanted. ’No matter where you go, there you are’.” Dipper quotes, and shrugs. Self-reflection isn't any Bill's thing, but still. He shakes his head. “No wonder he’s not happy.”

“Hm.” Bill agrees. Looking off into the distance, eye unfocused. 

For a while, actually. 

“Uh.” Dipper shuffles a bit closer. “Bill?”

Bill doesn’t seem to hear him. He remains eerily, discomfitingly silent. He gets up from his seat, brushing himself off with a frown. Not that he has anything on him; it’s a gesture made just to make one.

Whatever he’s struggling with on this topic, it’s giving him considerable trouble. Dipper’s rarely seen him this discomfited. Bill’s face twitches, he looks at the ground. Then at his own hands, clenching and unclenching them. 

Then he looks up at Dipper, slightly unfocused. Typically Bill’s quick to recover, but this time something’s shaken him. His mind isn’t settled.

Dipper checks to make sure no being is around to see this. 

He boops the tip of Bill’s nose.

Bill doesn’t quite start in place - but his head twitches back slightly, before trying to focus on the finger on his nose.

Dipper offers an awkward smile, and Bill snorts. He pushes Dipper’s hand down roughly, woken from his daze. His thumb strokes against the soft skin of Dipper’s wrist.

And he grins, wide.

“Now that’s the mind I manipulated into matrimony!” Bill hauls Dipper close, in an overly dramatic sweep that makes Dipper startle. “You’re right on the money!” 

“I was?” Dipper’s heart is racing. Mostly from the sudden movement. He clutches at Bill’s shirt. “I mean, I am.” He totally is.

“Mh-hm.” Bill presses an overly wet kiss to Dipper’s forehead, the jerk. “It doesn’t matter how well you craft the plan when your premise is flawed!”

Dipper wipes his forehead with the back of his hand. A bit of spit on his skin is nothing, he guesses. Not when Bill thinks he’s smart, and that marrying him was great, and….  

Anyway, it’s oddly comforting.

Bill pulls back, rubbing his hands together. No longer distracted, and wearing a bright, delighted look.

“That guy’s plan was perfectly constructed. In that it went off as exactly as well as it coulda.” Bill raises an imperious finger, wagging it in the air. “There was just one problem.” 

Dipper knows a prompt when he hears one. “Which is…?”

“Ahem.” Bill clears his throat, chest puffing out with pride. He winks. “That there is no world where that guy, as he is, gets what he wants!”

What? If there isn’t one -  “Then why is he here?”

“Because there isn’t one!” Bill looks amused now. Like they accidentally had the wrong mail delivered, instead of an infinitely powerful demon. “We got caught in an ‘ironic wish fulfillment’ gig.”

Ironic… what?

“Don’t give me that look, sapling. Irony is one of the main universal forces.” Bill grins even wider as an idea strikes him. “Looks like I got some stuff to introduce you to later.”

Whatever that entails. Part of Dipper was aware that Bill’s business trips weren’t exactly…. Earthly. So far he hasn’t joined his husband any, but it could be…

“Yeah.” Dipper scoots a little closer. “I guess we should.” 

Fine. Because it’s interesting. Because it’s bizarre, and scary, and fascinating. Dipper can’t resist the chance. 

“I knew you couldn’t resist.” Bill’s smug again, so self-satisfied.

“Maybe,” Dipper hedges. He has to add a rebuttal, Bill can’t win - so he swats his demon on the thigh. “Maybe I just want you to make up for missing date night.” 

Bill grins, and pats Dipper’s butt. “Oh, you’ll see.” His eye narrows. “You’ll see.” He’s amused, he’s annoyed, he’s…

Looking at Dipper with another expression he hasn’t seen before. Pleased, but different, sort of.

There’s a loud ‘fwump’ noise; the sound of a burst of flame. Both of them turn. 

And another. A crackling sound, as well as a bright, blue light in the woods. A tree topples over. Then another, hitting another - and several pine trees fall in a line like dominoes.

Dipper sinks back, shoulders rising. Bill turns towards the treeline with a disgusted glare.

Right. They have another problem.

A very close problem. 

Damn it, there should have been more time. Better even if Other Bill weren’t around at all. But he is, and it’s something they can’t ignore. Even with Bill’s absurd amount of magical power.

Hell, it’s because of Bill’s absurd amount of magic. There’s another being, exactly like him, and neither of them are stoppable by any conventional means. 

Dipper’s seen some demons duke it out, but never on this level. He’s not sure how-

“Ease up.” Bill winks, though his smile is fading. “I got a plan.”

Dipper gives that a Look. 

Most of Bill’s plans are smart, but they aren’t always successful. He’s only not arguing the point because he doesn’t have one himself. 

“Listen. If things get nasty-” And if Bill’s using that word, he really means ‘horrific’ - he squeezes Dipper’s upper arms, tight. “I need you to do me a favor.”

“Okay.” Dipper meets Bill’s eye, and takes a breath.

The absence of a smile is unnerving on its own. This time, Bill’s eerily sincere.

“No, listen.” Bill’s new expression, again, though Dipper can identify it now - Genuine concern. “No games, no messing around. You do what I tell ya.”

“I-” Dipper grips onto Bill’s arm. “Yeah, of course.” This is bad, things are going to be so bad. “Anything.”

This isn’t like an average monster. This is the same monster, equally as powerful, just as clever, and the exact same level of vicious. If not more so. 

This one doesn’t have a reason to hold back.

Bill shuts his eye. He breathes in slowly through his nose, then out again. When he opens it again, his face is stern, and he speaks through clenched teeth -  

“Don’t. Laugh.”

…What?

“I, yeah. Okay.” Dipper glances around. No, he can’t see any catch. “I promise.” 

And because Bill’s face is all scrunched up- 

“Yes, even if it’s really funny.” Dipper adds. Not that he can imagine what would be funny. He squeezes Bill’s arm, trying to make it seem not-reassuring, even though it totally is. “I want him to suffer just as much as you do.” 

Bill relaxes from a full-body tension. One Dipper didn’t notice until it left. 

“Sadism, that’s rare!” Bill tilts his head to one side, eternal grin reoccurring.  “He musta really gotten under your skin.”

“You’re the only being allowed to burrow under my flesh.” Grotesque, perhaps, but it does the job. Bill’s grin turns the slightest bit fonder, and Dipper matches it.  “I know you’ll ruin his next few millennia.”

The grin grows, wild and white. Bill pulls Dipper in until their chests are nearly flush, only broken by Dipper’s stupid sling blocking the way. 

There’s a horrible rending crack as a tree falls to one side of the clearing - where it’s neatly bisected by the rift itself, and promptly catches on fire. 

Bill stocks out his tongue, annoyed. “Oh, great.” He releases Dipper to set his hands on his hips. “Couldn’t wait, huh?”

Dipper follows his gaze, and sucks in a breath through his teeth.

Other Bill’s disheveled - the trip through the treeline hasn’t done his clothing any favors - with a thin line of blood trickling down his forehead. The ground around him is cracked and floating, the trees shifting into strange shapes warped by magic. 

As Dipper watches, the crazed lunatic grin spreads across his face. Other Bill slicks back his messed hair, and tilts his head at Dipper. A nod. And acknowledgement. Holding something of a promise. 

Dipper grabs onto the back of Bill’s shirt. Maybe a little too hard; the fabric twists under his fingers, sliding in between his knuckles.

An arm slides around his waist. 

When Dipper looks up, Bill’s still grinning. And he winks.

“Bill!” He exclaims, throwing his arms out in ‘delighted’ greeting, even as smoke from Other Bill’s path starts rising above the treeline. “How was your trip!”

“Not bad, really! I’ve had worse.” Other Bill wipes his forehead clean with two fingers. His face betrays none of the seething anger from moments ago, as his eye darts up and down. Starting to smirk. “How was playing nursemaid to the meatbag?”

The window between the jab and Bill’s response is barely a flicker, momentary. Bill’s lips part before even Dipper could come up with a retort-

And Other Bill continues. “Thousands of millenia of anatomical knowledge. Taking people apart and seeing how they tick - and you use it to kiss some boo-boos better.” He snorts. “So that’s how you ended up.”

Bill’s eye twitches - he pulls in a breath.

“I know you’re not proud of it. Yet here you are - smooching some scabs.” Other Bill stalks forward, tutting in shame. Barely a moment, and he’s already going for the throat, with that too-familiar slasher smile. “How does a Bill end up like that?”

Dipper glances at his husband’s face. 

Bill takes a long, dignified second to adjust his shirt collar. Like what Other Bill said was beneath him.

Obviously he’s not displaying it, but Bill’s not having a great time here. Not anticipating the instant response, and one hair slower from what he pulled earlier. His ego’s taken a hit and it’s rallying - but not rapidly.

Dipper waits for another second, in that awful silence. Mind racing.

And Bill…. Hasn’t said it was wrong.. 

Shit. Of course he hasn’t, it wouldn’t work. 

Dipper’s… honestly surprised he hadn’t considered it before. Back when this was still a theoretical showdown.

Both Bills are all about thoughts, true experts at reading people. Seeing through some baseless protest is so easy it’s downright laughable, and they’re different versions of the exact same being. 

Arguing with yourself… only means your opponent knows everything about you.

Including parts you wish they didn’t. 

Lying won’t work. Denial’s off the table. Going on the defensive just means a vulnerability, and there’s more there to poke at than either of them would admit. 

Bill’s shut his eye again. Breathing in, and already coming up with a plan. Not going great, either, by the frown on his face.

Other Bill’s not only quicker than Dipper - he can tell what Bill’s thinking, while he’s thinking it - and he has zero reasons to play fair. 

Dipper steps forward. Bill jerks in surprise, glancing at him.

“Yeah, well,” He hesitates a moment - nearby, Bill swears, though he says nothing - then Dipper charges rhetorically in, reckless. “At least he’s getting kisses.” 

“Not that rare a commodity, from what I can tell!.” Other Bill’s eye flickers over him, that internal confidence thick and bubbling up like tar. He spreads his arms. “You’re handing them out everywhere!” 

Dipper flinches. Shit. Bad idea. 

There’s a scab on his lip, an odd tugging feel when he talks. Next to him Bill’s expression doesn’t change one iota, but Dipper’s face burns with shame, and - and where the hell does Other Bill get off saying that, anyway, the two of them look exactly the same - 

“Gotta say, the one upside to this visit,” Other Bill sets hand on his hips. Smug, eye trailing over Dipper. “Is that I learned-”

“What, a new way to horrify people?” Dipper interrupts, and it catches Other Bill off guard. Not used to being talked over, there’s no snap response. “That was the worst kiss of my life.”

Other Bill splutters. Words form, then fumble. His shoulders rise. 

And next to Dipper, Bill bursts out laughing. A deep, thrilled sound, he even claps Dipper on the back, several times.. 

Wow, Other Bill… really didn’t have a retort on hand. With that typical Bill arrogance, he must have honestly thought he was doing great.

“Aw, c’mon sapling. Go easy on the amateur!” Bill purrs. His ego’s been bolstered, and now his voice drips with false sympathy. “I’m sure he tried his best.”

What works for one Bill works for another, and one of the few things that really gets to Bill - is being treated like an idiot.

Or worse, condescended to.

Other Bill stands still. Fists clenched by his side, teeth gritted and twitching.

There’s a rising pressure in the air. Like water flooding into the clearing, but invisible. 

For a moment Dipper feels almost weightless - then his ears’s aren’t ringing, though it feels like they should be. He rubs at the side of his head.

“This isn’t over.” Other Bill speaks in a slow growl.. He raises a fist, glowing with flame. “Until I’ve ruined your entire eon.”

“Hey!” Bill stands to attention. Setting his fists on his hips. “That’s my line!”

Dipper feels a shudder inside. A weird mix of nausea and lightness. He almost takes a step back, tightening his grip on Bill’s shirt.

For any magician, feeling their magic is like being aware of their own breathing. Unconscious, and automatic, like being able to tell when their balance is off, and they’re about to fall. Dipper didn’t have much of his own - but he’s been inundated with Bill’s for ages; he barely notices it anymore. 

This magic surges up and over everything.

The magical weather just turned from ‘barely-notice-you’re-outside’ to a high-pressure chamber. In a thunderstorm. Like turbulence in a plane,  or standing in waist deep water, threatening to pull him under. Definitely watching lightning strike in the distance.

It used to be in the background. Now Dipper’s having trouble noticing anything else.

Bill’s magic might not harm him, but the sheer amount being tossed around is starting to give him a headache. 

It’s also making the air shine in a weird way, like there are tiny mirrors around. The physical temperature’s risen by several degrees, but Dipper’s not sure if that’s why he’s begun to sweat.

“Might as well ‘kiss’ your dimension goodbye.” Other Bill drops in finger quotes, grin spreading like rot on his face - “This crapsack place might not be very fun, but since you’re not using it,” He shrugs. “Someone might as well!”

“This is my realm.” Bill takes a firm step forward, and the ground shakes. “Sure, it might need a renovation, or two! And yeah, it’s got its downsides.The mortals are boring and uncowed. Stanford Pines is still alive,” He frowns, counting them on his fingers, sticking out his tongue. “Not nearly enough natural disasters, and-”

Dipper elbows Bill in the side. 

“But it’s Pine Tree’s engagement gift, so it’s gotta stay intact for a sec.” Bill finishes without missing a beat. His sharp teeth are bared in something only vaguely like a smile. “I’m gonna be the guy to break the place.”

For once, Bill’s massive ego has an upside. 

Conquering this dimension is on his list of things to do. Not now, but later. It’s not like he’d mind a huge interdimensional disruption - if anything it’d advance his plans. Any other day, he’d raise an eyebrow. Roll his eyes at Dipper if he mentioned the problem, even shrug it off and ignore it. 

But not if it means letting someone else win.

“There’s a lot of stuff you screwed up when you pulled off this switch” Bill wiggles his eyebrows, and rests a self-important hand on his chest. “But the first was screwing with me.”

It even smells metallic now, like Bill’s magic. Dipper shakes his head. 

He can sense the difference between the two, if he really really concentrates on it. Bill’s magic is one tiny, minute shade off from Other Bill’s, two color swatches that would look identical in different lighting. If they weren’t shoving right against each other, it’d be impossible to tell.

The place where they push together is nearly visible. Extremely detectable, to Dipper, and it’s. 

Teetering. Not much, maybe by a half-degree. Then another, before it stabilizes, the barest fraction not in the direction Dipper would like it to go - 

Dipper doesn’t turn his head. But he does glance, briefly, to his side. 

There’s a very, very faint sheen of sweat on Bill’s temple. He strokes his hair back casually, a nothing gesture.

With dawning unease, Dipper realizes it’s not perfectly equal. 

Not less than an hour after making a ‘papercut’.

“Oh, no.” Other Bill’s voice drips with sarcasm. “The Bill who’s off playing house with some unwashed mortal twink.” He cups his cheeks in mock horror. “I’m quaking in my boots here.”

“Oh yeah? Three years of total control over a realm! And you fizzled out before you crossed the Atlantic.” Bill strides forward. “Some threat you are.”

Other Bill’s grin looks forced for a moment, as he regains his own self-center. “Compared to what? The most backwards, soft-shelled-”

“Fantastic kisser-”

“Which is only wiggling some meat around.”

Bill clicks his tongue, adding finger guns and a wink. “Spoken like an amateur.”

Dipper watches the insults, coming faster now. Then faster yet. 

Within seconds they’re almost overlapping each other, batting back and forth like a game of table tennis. 

The air is hot enough that the sweating is definitely physical in nature, and when Dipper glances upward - even the sky is turning a weird orangey-yellow. The air feels thick with magic, like things are in slow motion. 

Two magical heavyweights locked in place. Exerting their will. 

Near the clearing edge, one of the trees makes a ‘hmmpf’ sound, pulls up its bark like a skirt, and waggles away on its roots. Overhead, a flock of birds burst into flame. Their skeletons keep flying as if nothing happened. Dipper cringes. 

Two Bill Ciphers, right. Dipper guesses some weird magical side effects are to be expected. Thank hell he’s not affected.

Okay, the headache’s pretty bad. But it’s manageable. 

Whatever the two Bills are up to, it’s not visible. No flashy sparks flying, or laser beams, or whatever else.  All these things - the weight in Dipper’s head, the birds that just caught fire, and the second tree that has recently replanted itself upside down - they’re only side effects.

Dipper stands straighter, watching the back-and-forth with more intent. 

Now that he knows what he’s looking for, it’s obvious.

Two beings, perfectly matched. Exact duplicates. Offering insults, and challenges. Verbally sniping at each other instead of a physical fight, because punching each other wouldn’t make much of a difference.

That’s not where the real power lies.

Mindgames are Bill’s purview. Convincing people is his schtick. Getting the edge over his opponent is a matter of finding a weakness to exploit.

Call it… stubbornness. Morale. Sheer willpower.

The first ego to buckle here is the one that’s going to break. 

Other Bill tries to circle his Bill like a shark, and Bill deftly keeps stepping in the way. Not the best position, he should be more aggressive, but he’s keeping his back to Dipper and managing to look nonchalant about it. A good move, considering he has… stuff he gives a shit about. His facade hasn’t cracked in the slightest.

Bill’s on the backfoot, magically, but he’s braced himself and is holding strong. As long as nothing throws him off balance, Dipper can try and think of… Something. A way to tip the scales - 

“And what’s your next grand plan for married life, huh? Grocery shopping?” Other Bill stalks forward, smug enough that it makes Dipper want to hit him -  “Or laundry?”

Bill makes a ‘gnk’ sound, eye twitching and arms tense at his sides. The magic tilts another half-degree in the wrong direction - 

And Dipper winces. 

If he’d realized chore distribution was going to be something an alternate universe version of his husband could weaponize, he’d’ve….

Probably still made Bill wash the sheets. They were getting gross.

“And once you’ve finished doing the freakin’ dishes, maybe you’ll even,” Other Bill purses his lips, wrapping his arms around an invisible body. His voice drips so heavily with condensation it’s moist.  “Snuggle him at night.”

Oddly, there’s a shift. In the right direction. 

Dipper gives Bill a weird look as he perks up.

“Well,” Bill draws the word out, long. Rubbing his chin thoughtfully. “That part does make up for a lotta the rest.”

There’s a beat, then Other Bill scoffs - 

But no. Too little, too late. He’s not the only Bill who can read people. 

“Now I get it!” Bill snaps his fingers in realization, beaming. “That’s why you went for the face!” 

“It was-”

“Too feisty. Too cute. ” Bill continues over him. He tilts Dipper's chin up with one finger, and smirks. “Not at all yours.” He turns to Other Bill, smug as anything. Letting his finger trail down Dipper’s neck. “I bet you couldn’t stand looking at it, huh?”

A beat of silence. Other Bill grits his teeth.  

“But you couldn’t bring yourself to ruin it completely. Because if I know my Pine Tree - which I do! - Then I figure you got just a little, tiny, miniscule,” Bill pinches his fingers close together. A toothpick would barely fit. “Itty bitty taste of affection.” His grin is sharp as a razor, viciously pleased. “And that gave you ideas.”

What kinds of ideas, Dipper’s own mind is racing, unpleasantly so -

“Something cute and soft in your bed. A thing you can curl up with at night, and squeeze up against you.” Bill winks at his counterpart. “Been a while, hasn’t it?”

Other Bill recoils like he’s been shot, staggering back a half-step.

The alarming part is seeing his cheeks turn the faintest bit pink.

“And everything you imagined - it’s all true! This is a million times better than something inanimate!” Bill exclaims, shameless and thrilled, throwing his arms wide. “Those can’t hold you back.”

Oh god. 

Dipper stands very still. Eyes wide. 

The suspicion was almost a joking one, too ridiculous to be real, but holy shit the demonic teddy bear thing has…. precedent.

Other Bill grunts like he’s been struck in the stomach, tucking an arm over it.

Bill only chuckles, shaking his head. Wrapping his arms around Dipper, and pressing his cheek up against his hair. “So much for your daydreams.” And Dipper can hear how smug he is, dripping with possessiveness. “See where that got you?”

A long, chest-heaving moment. Other Bill gathers himself, calm again in face if not in mind… 

That’s. Not a good look. 

Dipper can’t identify this one either. He’s learning a lot he didn’t know. Things he didn’t know that he didn’t know. 

“Hell. I see where it got you.” Other Bill waves that off, shaking his head. He looks… strange. Not upset, or angry. Something else. “You’re domesticated.”

Bill’s grip on Dipper clamps down. Painfully tight. 

It takes him a moment. “What.”

 Dipper squirms, but. Bill’s genuinely tense. It takes a little more wriggling before Bill remembers the human he’s holding, and his arms drop back to his sides. 

“Domesticated.” Other Bill repeats. Standing straight now, and his lip curls up in a sneer. “Like an animal.”

Bill breathes in sharply.

Dipper waits for a second, but there’s no followup. 

“Hundreds of thousands of years! The power we built, the things we did for it -” Other Bill waves at them. Frustrated. Disgusted. “And this is how you end up.” 

The low growl rumbles, Dipper can feel it resonate through the chest, into his back. 

“I’m in charge. I'm a ruler. I’m the power behind the realm of minds, and I don’t take orders from anyone,” Other Bill declares, stalking forward and jabbing a thumb at his chest. “And you’re here, whinging at the beck and call of a mortal.” 

“That’s not-” Bill hisses through clenched teeth

“It’d be fine if you were disgusting! I get gross.” Other Bill flicks a finger at Bill, like he could send him over the treeline. Dismissing him. “But no. You’re just pathetic.”

Bill makes a low sound, deep in his throat. “That’s. Not. How it works.” His voice is ragged. 

Dipper doesn’t turn. He doesn't react.

He does feel the magic tilt at a dangerous angle, braced for the moment. He hunches over, shoulders turning inward. 

Crap, damn it, shit. This wasn’t supposed to go this way.

Bill’s still trying. Bill’s too stubborn not to. Bill's got a ton of knowledge and rhetoric to work with- 

But he can’t find a way to flip this in his favor.

Protesting isn’t getting him anywhere, either, and acting defensive is a terrible position to be in. 

Dipper pushes his back up against Bill’s chest, thoughts racing, fast.

Okay. How to flip this. Turn it around. Crap, what argument works, he should be good at this by now, he’s had plenty of practice.

Only….

Bill is domesticated. A little. Not much. At best he’s housebroken, in that he keeps his evil out of the Shack. Though he still knocks stuff off counters when he’s bored.

So it can’t be refuted. Not in a useful way, and not in a way either of them can think of, and that’s a major problem because it lets Other Bill talk about him like he’s some kind of… servant.

Which is just so wrong.

Dipper snorts.

Other Bill glances at him, out of the corner of his eye. Bill’s still tense, but he does the same.

Dipper shrugs, though he’s still smiling.

The truth is, Bill does what he wants, all the time. Pushing him into doing anything is like pulling teeth, and sometimes that includes things he actually enjoys.

Dipper can’t stop him. Hell, he doesn’t bother trying. Being frustrating and insane and terrible are all just… Bill things, he wouldn’t be himself if he did anything else.

Bill Cipher only does what he pleases. 

Sometimes, what pleases him is seeing Dipper happy, and he has to go out of his way a little.

And it works both ways. 

Bill can’t make Dipper do anything, not if he doesn’t want to already - But sometimes Dipper does stuff that Bill would like. Just on occasion. If he feels like it. Bill has a really nice smile, if you’re okay with it always looking a little sadistic. 

Other Bill’s different. A demon, unchanged, on whatever the closest to the straight and narrow is for a regular Bill.

It makes him an idiot. 

He can only think of a relationship as… transactional. Someone has to be in power, there has to be a winner at the end of it - or else what’s the point?

The idea that they might be using each other is the closest he’ll manage, and that still wouldn’t be right.

Dipper sighs, then. Letting out a long-held breath, and smiling.

“Don’t bother.” He takes Bill’s hand, interlacing their fingers. “He’s not gonna get it.”

Bill glances over at him. Frowning, still frustrated. But he doesn’t take his hand away.

Dipper tugs him a little closer, and shrugs. 

Arguing about this is going to be like trying to tell Mabel that boy bands aren’t cool, or Stan that money’s not important, or Ford about… A lot of stuff. Bill could flip it a million ways and it would still never land.

Bill purses his lips. The idea isn’t pleasant to him. He taps the ground with a foot for a moment. Then raises an eyebrow. He’s used to winning his arguments. Even with himself. 

Especially, perhaps, with himself.

Oh, for crying out - Dipper rolls his eyes, and elbows his idiot demon.

Even Bill took a while to understand what he was in for, and he likes it. The chances of Other Bill comprehending are next to nil. 

Bill breathes in slowly, annoyed. Tilting his head in begrudging acknowledgement. Even his arrogant ass can admit he’s stubborn, and this other version has no experience in the ways of mortal-handling. 

Other Bill speaks up, then. Tense, and suspicious. “What are you two doing?”

Nothing, really. Neither of them have spoken. 

Bill stands a little straighter. He meets Dipper’s eyes, and his own widens. Man, Other Bill really doesn’t get it, he’s missing the completely obvious.

Bill starts grinning, but Dipper jolts back in surprise.

Oh shit, they’re doing a couple thing. 

But then. They’ve known each other so long, and spent tons of it reading each other. Waiting for the moment to strike with an insult, or finding out a secret plan. Or just learning what the other didn’t want to talk about, which is. More often than not. 

Hell, It’s been two years. Maybe it’d be weirder if they couldn’t.

Dipper feels oddly self-conscious. He squeezes Bill’s hand a little harder, and it’s quickly returned. 

“Ah, forget this loser!” Bill dismisses his counterpart with a wave, reeling on Dipper with a bright smile. “Who’s my adorable little mortal?”

Dipper leans back a bit, annoyed. 

Then shuts his eyes. Steeling himself.

This is a contest of ego, Bill’s already wrung out, and he’s in a bad position. While he’s keeping up well, things aren’t going his way - and the last thing Dipper wants is for his Bill to lose. 

He knows he can help out, too. Make that ego balloon, turning all that arrogance useful for once, and all he has to do is say….

 “I am.” 

“That’s what I thought.” Bill slides in closer. Eternal grin expanding, one arm makes its way around Dipper’s waist. “Who’s all mine?” He purrs.

Dipper knows his face is red. If he’s making a fair attempt at crushing Bill’s hand, too, that’s just. Pre-revenge.

“I am.” He admits, and lets himself slump. It’s true, in a way. If you look at it from a bizarre, Bill-like perspective. 

“And who.” Bill slides his other arm around his waist. Dipper’s dragged in close enough to feel that unnatural heart. “Does everything I say-”

"Don’t push it.” 

Bill starts cackling, and Dipper gives him a shove out of pure habit. Not that it does anything - it never has - but it’s important that he makes his point. 

“You,” Bill says, shaking his head slowly. Almost wonderingly. There’s a pleased smirk on his face, he cups Dipper’s unharmed cheek. “Have completely ruined my life.”

Dipper knows he's smiling. Feeling a light, bright flutter in his chest. Leaning into that warm palm on his cheek, he rests a hand over Bill's. “I know.”

If Bill’s goal is to embarrass Dipper, he’s well on his way. Not unpleasantly so, it’s just - Other Bill’s right there, he can hear all of this-

“Don’t think you’re gonna get away with this,” Bill insists, trying for a glare and magnificently failing. “All this crap is entirely your fault.”

Dipper laughs. He knows he’s blushing. “Shut up.” He tugs Bill in by his collar, because he can’t just say things like that without expecting a retort. “Come here.”

Kissing Bill can’t get too enthusiastic, Dipper’s face still hurts and his lip has a scab, but it’s so, so nice. Gentle, as far as Bill-kisses go, and with a flicker of tongue. When Bill tilts him back a little, he goes with it.

Nearby, there’s the sound of dry heaving, and Dipper finds he doesn’t care. Fuck their audience. He’s a dick, anyway.

Bill draws back, planting another quick kiss on him. “Now that’s how an expert does it..” Another gagging noise - and Bill rolls his eye. “Jeez, someone’s dramatic.” 

“Alright, this is straight up unsalvageable.” Other Bill’s face is a perfect picture of fascinated revulsion. Like he’s watching a trainwreck, or a compelling yet horrifying internet video. He points at both Bill, and DIpper. “You’re both disgusting, and I hate you.”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m getting to you.” Bill rolls his eye, huffing out a breath. He hauls Dipper upright again, patting his sides. “Wait here.”

Dipper steps back, and Bill strolls towards his counterpart. Other Bill throws his arms in the air, in a ‘finally’ gesture.

Dipper doesn’t reach out. He holds his hand by his side, feeling tense. 

Throwing Other Bill off and giving his Bill a morale boost are both positives -  but this isn’t exactly a stable situation.

Whatever Bill has planned, Dipper hopes it’s pretty goddamn good.

Bill takes a long, slow breath in. He slowly lets it outt. He brushes off the front of his suit, and rolls his head around in a circle, neck making unsettling noises, before he stands firm, and grins. 

“So the dog comes back on the orders of his master,” Other Bill purrs, leaning forward. He seems annoyed when Bill doesn’t flinch this time. “Whatcha got?”

“Oh, a couple things,” Bill says lightly. His grin goes insanely wide. Inhumanly wide, as he cracks his knuckles. “Let’s play hardball.”

Leaving Dipper behind is so casual that it almost seems intentional. Other Bill’s eye darts toward him, and Dipper stands very still, and very, very calm. 

This had better be a good plan. 

“So!” Bill claps his hands together, and grins. “Do you remember that one party in the southwest aphasia district?”

“Huh.” Other Bill cocks his head to the side in mild confusion. “Which one?”

“Oh, the last one we went to!” Bill strides forward, with a knowing smile. “The one where someone told us it was a costume gig, but when we showed up - Guess who’s the only one in an outfit!” 

The reaction is instant. Other Bill sucks in a breath, cringing back.

Bill lets out a low whistle. “Wearing that stupid getup all night. And trying to play it cool didn’t work either!” He clicks his tongue, shaking his head. “What a mess.”

“Yeah, great. We really needed that reminder.” Other Bill rubs at his eye. “So-”

“And that one body wash, too!” Bill snaps his fingers. “The one that promised it’d shine us up? Only it left all these,” He brushes his suit off, grimacing. “Grey smudges?”

This time, Other Bill winces. “Yeah, I know.” He widens his stance, almost defensively, and his teeth are bared. “What about it?”

“Whoo, man that was bad! People thought we were pyrite.” Bill strides forward, clapping a consoling hand on his opponent’s shoulder. “We took up that cloak, for like, two decades before it finally washed off!” He slashes a hand over his throat. “Not a good look.”

“Ugh.” Now Other Bill groans. He covers his eye - then turns on Bill, anger rising.  “What the hell is this about?”

Bill doesn’t answer. Only grips Other Bill’s shoulder tighter - 

And keeps talking.

Other Bill tries to talk over him, but Bill doesn’t stop. He never stops when he’s asked to. If anything it only encourages him, and the way Other Bill looks as he throws in other anecdotes? Adds plenty more motivation.

Dipper draws a sharp breath, and holds it.

None of these stories are ones he’s heard before. Absolutely zero of them are flattering, there’s a tension rising in the air that isn’t just magical - 

And come to think of it, Dipper really shouldn’t be here.

“And-”

“Augh!” Now Other Bill slaps him away, recoiling from Bill’s too-cozy grip. “Would you shut up?”

“Oh, here’s an old one!” Bill rambles on as if he hadn’t heard the objection, rubbing his hands together. “I don’t even remember the name of the club, y’know? But man do I remember what happened! We curried favor with them for ages.” He saunters closer. A slinking, predatory figure. “And do you remember what they said?

Other Bill goes very pale. And very quiet.

“They were still laughing when we stormed off.” Bill shakes his head, a wry smile on his face. “Cripes, we shoulda known, right? Like they’d ever let someone like us join.” He throws a companionable arm around Other Bill’s shoulders. And grins. “Boy did we feel stupid.”

Other Bill twitches, once. “Ha ha! Good one!” The laugh comes out tight, he slaps a hand over Bill’s mouth. Turning towards Dipper with a charming smile that’s brittle on the edges. “That didn’t happen.”

“Sure it did! We-”

Bill has to scramble for a second as Other Bill surges in

Dipper stops himself before he takes a step. It’s… fine. Probably. 

Hell, he’s wanted to throttle Bill himself a few times. Though he doesn’t think he’d put this much effort into it. 

Bill, for his part, doesn’t seem terribly bothered. Grinning unchanged. One of Other Bill’s wrists is caught in his grip, while the other hand clamps on his throat. “And another thing-”

Bill’s head bobbles back and forth as Other Bill shakes him. “What is wrong with you?”

Dipper should… probably do something? Maybe. No idea what he could do, at this point.

For the moment, Bill seems confident enough, while his counterpart’s off balance. But it’s bizarre. It’s insane. There’s no reason he would, or could ever admit any of this - 

Only.

Bill had a plan. For if things got ‘nasty’. 

A last-ditch contingency that he warned his mortal about, albeit indirectly. 

Dipper’s here precisely so he could listen to all of…. This stuff. 

Even if Bill hadn’t warned him, he wouldn’t laugh. All Dipper feels is stunned.

Part of him wants to think these stories are all made up - but they have to be true, or it wouldn’t have set Other Bill off. No kind of bullshit would send him into this kind of full-on rage. 

He’s swearing over Bill, or attempting to. Partly in English, but more in that strange demonic tongue.

And Bill clicks his tongue, makes a finger gun - and keeps talking.

By hearing this, Dipper’s in possession of a considerable amount of completely forbidden knowledge. Stuff nobody, ever, possibly in the multiverse knows - 

And that’s the point.

In the end, it’s all about ego. 

Introspection wouldn’t affect Other Bill. Another Bill knowing these things is natural, albeit annoying. Bringing these things up would suck, but it wouldn’t sting.

To really make the mortification sink in, you need an audience. 

Dipper’s again uncertain if he should be here. He rubs his other arm, shifting foot to foot. Admittedly he’s fascinated. Learning anything about Bill’s past is so rare he can’t even think of the last time it happened. 

An absolutely insane tactic, for any Bill. It’s his past too, yet he’s flinging it all out there. Seemingly unashamed.

There’s going to be a downside.

“The beret just did not suit us.” Bill clicks his tongue again, shaking his head. One outspread palm under a hovering picture of Bill, though a bit… different. Other Bill is trying to smack it down, but he dodges away. “Fashion disaster.” 

Then Bill turns towards Dipper, and winks. “What do you think?” Other Bill makes a strangled sound, gripping onto Bill’s jacket with alarm.

Dipper tilts his head. 

Yeah, the beret just looks weird on a triangle. He gestures a ‘so-so’ thing. “Doesn’t go with your shape.”

Bill shrugs it off easily. Amused acceptance. “Eh, whatever. They can’t all be winners!” 

Other Bill makes another choked sound. He’s gone entirely red, jaw clenched tight.

So has his eye. 

It’s focused on Dipper now, and as the grimace turns into a scowl, he surges up and forward. Viciously fast, arm extending outward -

Dipper reacts with a flinch, instinctively pulling for a shield. No time to finesse, just the first one that comes to mind, fuck, he’s here for a reason but he’s not immortal.

There’s a flash of light.

Dipper shuts his eyes against it, magic braced. Already knowing it won’t work.

Curtains closed. Show over. A dignity, wounded - but it’ll be restored, once nobody else knows any part of this.

Heat. 

Sound.

Bright, searing light makes Dipper see red behind his shut eyes. Loud crunching noises, strong wind, and a low-toned buzz, almost electronic, that rings in tandem with his eardrums.

He’s still standing, though, and he doesn’t think he’s being disintegrated. Or at least he can’t feel any of it, and -  wow, Dipper knew he was pulling pretty hard, but it didn’t feel like he put up a protection that good.

As the blast slows, and passes - the sound fading - he peeks an eye open. 

Okay. 

He didn’t.

Dipper slowly lets his arms, and his own shield drop. 

There’s a spherical barrier around him, barely visible except for the oil-slick iridescence. One that’s held up without any apparent effort. 

He can’t say so much for the ground around it. 

Other Bill was lightning-quick, and Dipper caught on just in time to put up some defense. Seeing him twitch gave enough warning that Dipper might have left his shoes behind, instead of being totally obliterated.

Bill was faster than both of them. Quick as a thought. 

Like he’d prepared for it.

Other Bill smacks his face, dragging his fingers down. “Are you kidding me?”

“Ah, ah, ah! You got your one mortal-beating chance.” Bill smacks the back of Other BIll’s head hard enough to make him stagger. His voice turns condescending. ”You couldn’t have projected that move any harder if it was friggin’ movie night.”

Other Bill clutches the back of his head, swearing again. One knee hits the ground.

Dipper stares at the inside of the bubble, opalescent and translucent around him. The surface swirls in little fractals. A delicate look belying some serious power. 

Other Bill’s breathing hard, his face twisted up. Hands buried in his hair, swearing at his failure. 

Unlike his counterpart, Bill’s still grinning. He buffs his nails on his shirt with a flourish.

“You’ve lost it, Bill!” Other Bill throws an arm out to the side, teeth bared. He glares up at his counterpart. “You’re burning down your entire relationship - and for what?” Chest heaving, eye alight, he makes a cutting motion. “You’ll end up with nothing.” 

“Pffft. Hardly!” Bill snorts, examining his nails. A slight, pleased smirk on his face. “Pine Tree’s not gonna love me any less.”

Other Bill’s jaw works. Protests form and die on his lips, he grimaces, looking at Dipper with anger. With disgust. With a full rolling boil of emotions - 

Including the slightest hint of… unease. 

Dipper had the right of it, earlier. 

Other Bill won’t get it. Can’t get it, because it’s too foreign, too emotional. Too weird. It’s truly outside of his comprehension, and to top it off - 

“I mean. He’s right.” Dipper admits with a shrug. Bill’s usually right, but not about this type of thing.  “Kind of more, actually.”

Dipper was expecting a protest, or at least a sharp retort. Another disgusted comment or something? Something, at least.

Dumping a cold bucket of water on Other Bill couldn’t have doused him faster.

Other Bill struggles for words. He searches Dipper’s face, eye darting around for something he doesn’t find. He drops down to his other knee. 

Besides him, Bill’s smile is filled with pure sadistic triumph. 

“So much for the swap plan, huh?” He leans an elbow on his opponent, bending over. “All that time spent setting this up. Looking for the right opportunity. And just when you think you got it-” Bill tuts, shaking his head. “Man. I almost hate to see another Bill fail!”

“You-” Other Bill’s clutching at his head. He shuts his eye, looking almost- pained? “It should have worked-”

“Yeah, yeah. Turns out it’s not one size fits all. We’re not entirely the same guy. Yours must look a little different, y’know?” A shrug, Bill looks oddly contemplative. Then he smirks, voice almost a purr. “And that means you couldn’t steal mine.” 

This would be a great time for Dipper to know what they’re talking about. But he doesn’t, not yet. He listens instead.

“Credit where it’s due - I don’t think most of us think to look for it, y’know?” Bill continues, “You were almost there!” And he spreads his arms wide, beaming. “And here I got what you want without even trying - and that just eats you up inside, don’t it?”

Other Bill sucks in a breath. Some of his ego has returned, he gets to on knee. “You’re lying.”

“Oh yeah? I’ll prove it!” Bill kneels down in front of him, elbow on his knee. “You wanna hear me say it?” The smile turns vicious. “Right to your face?

Other Bill flinches back - but he’s drawn in anyway.

And as Bill cups Other Bill’s face in his hands, it makes a mockery of gentleness. He leans in so his mouth almost against his enemy’s ear. Voice low, and smug. “I'm-” 

Dipper doesn’t hear the rest of the sentence. 

Maybe it’s too quiet. 

Maybe Bill didn’t get a chance to finish it, because Other Bill strikes like a snake.

Mostly, he just sees Other Bill surging upward to his feet, snapping sharp teeth at Bill’s face, splattering a little blood from one cheek, onto another. 

Bill leans back - snorts, amused - and knees him in the stomach. 

Okay. 

Now it’s a physical fight.

Dipper tries to move in - then hesitates. Breaking the bubble is probably a bad idea, he’s not going to overpower either of them - So. Great. He can help with the magic, a little, but not with this. 

It doesn’t last long.

Other Bill takes a swing at Bill’s face. It smacks into an upraised palm with an impact Dipper can hear even from where he’s standing.. 

Bill’s eternal grin turns downright vicious. Slowly tightening his grip around the fist, with a slight ‘crunch’. 

“Strong grip, huh?” Other Bill’s speaks through a pained grin. The next one collides with Bill’s stomach, and Bill winces briefly - then wags his eyebrows. Other Bill face falls, disgusted. “Oh, come on!”

While Other Bill had the magical advantage, he’s still in a human-ish body.

Meanwhile, Bill’s only shapeshifted into this form. There’s no real flesh to hit. 

“Y’know, I love a little banter. And even a little beating!” BIll proclaims, stepping forward. “But you messed with my stuff.” He takes another step. “So forget the struggle! Let’s get to the point.”

The magic that once seemed so overwhelming is - It’s something. 

Less pressure, warmer air. More metallic, a slight hint of ozone. Still very Bill-y in the whole… everywhere,  but now Dipper can’t sense any line where they meet.

“You-”

“Face to face.” Bill declares, and slams his arm into Other Bill’s chest.

Actually into his chest, without exiting. 

Dipper darts his eyes around, trying to see if it’s a trick of the light, or an angle, but. Uh. 

He was… kind of thinking he’d have to do some major body repairs, but now he’s not sure what’s going on. 

Bill hums to himself, head tilted. Rummaging around, as Other Bill makes ‘glrk’ and ‘urk’ sounds, limbs faintly twitching. Bill sticks his tongue out, eye nearly shut, like he’s fishing for something stuck under the couch.

“Aha!” And he draws back, triumphantly letting the body fall loose to the ground. Clasping his prize in both hands. “There you are!”

Holding up Other Bill. The real other Bill, golden and triangular and -

Oddly small? 

Only somewhat larger than a dinner plate, and Dipper knows Bill’s real form is a lot bigger than that. Though it does change size depending on how he’s - 

Crap, Dipper has to admit , again, that Bill actually knows what he’s doing. Even when his plans are insane. Maybe especially then.

He’s taken a huge chunk out that pride. It could only be more obvious if there were actual dents.

Other Bill pats his surface a few times, equally as surprised as Dipper at his sudden reemergence from the body. 

“Not feeling so ultimate now, are ya?” Bill taunts, shaking him back and forth.“What a shame.”

Other Bill swears, and strains. Tugging at Bill’s wrists, at his hand, a slap on his face - nothing happens. He kicks his legs, glaring utter fury at Bill.

“Fine. Fine!” Other Bill spits out the words like curses, glowing a deep red. “Keep your crummy realm, your crummier mortal, and wallow in your disgusting pit of - ah, what do I care? Screw you both.” Other Bill brushes his surface off, eye shut. He’s holding onto as much dignity as he can. “I’m outta here.”

“Ah, ah, ah!” As Other Bill tries to float away, Bill yanks him back sharply. His teeth are white and sharp as his smile.  “We’re not done here.”

The very air around them turns dark - a psychosomatic effect, huh, Ford probably could write a paper about it. Mind demon energy, and its effects on reality. 

An acrid smoke rises from beneath Bill’s fingertips, and Other Bill’s pupil narrows to a single point.

Dipper clears his throat, and turns away. 

God, he hopes Bill isn’t going to take his time with this. He’s never liked this part of his husband’s… hobbies, though it has been useful, on occasion. And Other Bill has been a total dick…

Dipper hums to himself, and tries to find something to occupy his attention.

Welp, he’s in… a bubble of some kind. Very interesting, magically. Also, prettier than he would have expected from Bill. Protective spells aren’t his typical thing.

Behind him, there’s shouts, and curses. Sounds of struggle, and high pitched laughter over thudding, clanging. A single, rubbery twang.

“Not the eye not the eye-” 

Right. Ignoring that. Not the first horrible noise he’s heard, and far from the last. Dipper presses a fingertip on the inside of the spherical shield around him, just gently, just to touch - 

And it pops instantly like a soap bubble, making him start.

Bill’s always had some weirdness to his magic, and it’s usually fascinating. This isn’t how Dipper thought a Bill-generated shield would work, but he has to admit it’s effective. Nigh impenetrable to outside forces, at the cost of being vulnerable from within.

Eventually, it’s quieter. There’s some humming, a couple of pats. Then the sound of something heavy being dragged. 

Dipper breathes out. About time; that was longer than he would have liked.

He turns.

Bill whistles a jaunty tune to himself, strolling towards the rift, hauling Other Bill behind him by one noodly black leg. It leaves a long trail through the dirt and grass.

Other Bill’s hand twitches, once or twice. Fingers leaving a weak trail behind him. Alive, somehow. Though his eyehole is an empty socket, and there’s more than a few dents. Dipper decides not to wonder where the hat went. 

Bill drops his counterpart’s leg, and cracks his knuckles. Standing right in front of the rift, he reaches out, digs his fingers in- 

Peeling the wound open like an orange. Or like a surgeon, exposing the beating heart inside a chest, and shit is it bright.

Dipper covers his eyes - he was not expecting that - and shit, he didn’t know Bill could do that. Is that what Other Bill was going to do earlier? Manipulate the wound?

“Hey morons!” Bill shouts. When Dipper manages to squint through the light, he sees him cupping his hands near his mouth. “You can take your second-rate Cipher back!”

With a quick jerk, he picks up Other Bill. Bouncing in one palm, once, then twice. Then he curls his wrist, and flings Other Bill into the rift like a frisbee.

There’s a long, distant-sounding shout. Some softer exclamations, too, but Bill’s voice rings out over them all. 

“Enjoy your crappy universe, loser! You can stew in that for as long as you like!” Bill sets his palms on either side of the hole, grinning wide. “And don’t come back.”

Dipper stares at his back. 

Bill Cipher is a dark, ominous outline against the light of the rift. A familiar silhouette.

And standing straight and proud. Even pleased. Shoulders squared, hands on his hips.

Given everything that he’s said today, Bill should be just as dimmed as his enemy. He knows that Dipper knows, and Dipper knows that Bill knows that he knows, and it doesn’t - 

Well. 

It’s not part of their mindgames. Is it.

Bill makes a gesture Dipper doesn’t know the meaning of; he only recognizes it as extremely rude - and he slams the opening shut. He brushes his hands off, smug and pleased.

“And that’s that.” He declares, with deep satisfaction. Flipping off the long thin line of the rift, one last time. “So long, sucker.”

Dipper shrugs, and heads over to his arrogant, demonic jerk. He nudges Bill on the side, just to watch him grin.

He knows a lot about this strange and insane being, and Dipper’s proud of his expertise. The time he’s spent studying him. The work he does to figure everything out. The way he understands Bill, more than anyone else.

Yet it’s still surprising when he discovers something new.

Dipper takes his husband’s hand in his own. Bill squeezes it back.

This time, Bill let him know about… all of it.

He trusted Dipper would understand.

“I always knew I was the best version of myself.” Bill watches the rift, and nodding to himself. “Though I gotta admit it’s nice to prove it.”

The rift still glows, in the same eerie light. Faded, slightly, an eggshell crack that seems less… bleedy? Maybe because it’s less lit up.

Healing takes a while, Dipper guesses.

He leans his head on Bill’s shoulder.

Mind filled with forbidden secrets, and embarrassments. The parts of the past you wish you could leave behind. The ways they could be used to break someone down. 

“One time, in middle school?” Dipper starts, and feels Bill perk up with curiosity. “Mabel found out who I had a crush on and would not shut up until I asked him out, and I got so nervous I threw up on his shirt.”

Bill starts laughing, head tilting back. He pulls Dipper a little closer. "Oh, I know.” Dipper feels a cheek rub up against his hair. “What a gross little nerd.”

Having a demon around is bizarre, illegal, and dangerous. At best you’ll survive it with most of your limbs. Most times you won’t make out alive. Only a complete madman would think they’d manage to handle meeting a demon, it’s perfect insanity.

So it’s a testament to how messed up they both are that Dipper wonders what he’d do without this one.

“So.” Dipper settles up against his husband, giving him a skeptical look. “What do you have that he doesn’t?”

“Hm?” Bill blinks, as if he wasn’t paying attention. Then he beams at Dipper, and winks. “Oh, I’m getting laid.”

This fucking liar.

It’s okay though. Dipper wasn’t expecting anything else. Part and parcel of dealing with a demon, who never, ever makes things simple. Who can’t admit anything, except to himself.

Dipper thinks he knows it anyway. 

“One tiny bit of time to get to play around with this planet, and it’s while you’re busted up.” Bill mutters. He's glaring around the clearing.  “And I’m in a space the size of a breadbox.” He makes a face, and sighs. “Guess it’ll have to wait for another day.”

Bill says it with resignation. Also like he’s doing Dipper a favor, somehow. 

Dipper pats him on the back with as much sarcasm as he can. Bill’s wiped out, the lying asshole. Having an equal opponent took a ton out of him. He has a few minutes of full power, but he can’t play around as much as he’d like.

Oh no. How horrible. 

“Back to the Shack, then.” And at Bill’s raised eyebrow, Dipper adds, “You have enough to go freak out Grunkle Stan.”

Stan hasn’t seen Bill’s real form - neither has Mabel - and this should occupy Bill’s time nicely before he’s sucked back into the Mindscape.

And if it pulls attention away from Dipper looking roughed up, well. He won’t complain.

“Conniving, clever - and just a little selfish.” Bill raises an eyebrow. He’s seen through Dipper as much as it goes the other way. Though he’s smiling, and it doesn’t have an edge to it. “I love the way you think, Pine Tree.”

Bill picks him up. Dipper doesn’t protest, for once. Tiredness is catching, and the evening is starting to set in. Bill bounces him a little, until Dipper starts glaring. 

“You’re really lucky, Bill.” He wraps his arm around Bill’s neck, setting his chin on his shoulder. “In no other universe would I let you do this.”

“‘Cause it’s the best universe, kid.” Bill lifts him a little higher, and grins. “There’s no place like home.”

#Bill vs Bill #No fun tag list here because I'm too tired to make one #Watch this space for a bunch of random stuff that was/is in my head #Thank hell I finally completed this #That took a long time #Okay okay I will add one amusing tag #Its name was Francois

[blep-23]

Chapter 51 is finally finished and posted. I am halfway through chapter 52 though. Rejoice.

#httyd #race to the edge #dagur the deranged #bon the ruthless #vfofal #chapter 51 #finally posted #jesus #that took a long time #it was annoying #i think i used rejoice right

[downrightembarassing]

Thank you iPhone for correcting Hondo to Honda. Great job 💀

#at least it’s trained to say fuck #instead of duck #that took a long time #rambles

[heart-locket-musicboxless]

•. A visit in a dream .•

#the owl house #toh #my art #cw fatphobia #toh comic #amity blight #amity toh #toh amity #green haired amity #time skip amity #time skip Luz #luz noceda #lumity #angst #toh angst #it's finally done omg #idk why it took me so long to make this but it's a great improvement from my last comic imo

[lucdoodle]

Adam and Lute go brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

#you would NOT believe how long it took me to choose the color of charlie's hair #just... an embarassing amount of time #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel adam #hazbin hotel lute #adam #lute #charlie #charlie morningstar #hazbin hotel charlie #myart

[reds-skull]

I really should draw Soap more with his red mask, as you all can tell I love it

#call of duty modern warfare 2 #cod mw2 #cod soap #cod ghost #john soap mactavish #simon ghost riley #ghostsoap #soapghost #ghoap #cod fanart #cod comic #call of duty modern warfare #call of duty fanart #call of duty #this took. like a month. #dont expect this level of detail in the future. it looks nice but it takes wayyy too long to make #and. i dont have that kind of time #anyways. i imagine this happens pre-romantic relationship #it makes it funnier for me to draw ghost so obviously whipped and have soap like clueless lmao

[bigfatbreak]

Birds of a Feather previous / next

#my art #feralnette au #birds of a feather #long tags #sorry I went apeshit in the tags #LETS SAY IT ALL TOGETHER NOW #I - M - A - G - OOOOOOOOO #its fun drawing marinette's back to Alya and having her appear stout and unstoppable and totally logical #and then you see her face and she's like two seconds from completely snapping and is keeping it together by a thread #as a note just because mari feels very certainly abt smth doesnt mean she's right. feelings can be valid and also irrational #in the throes of grief she decided it was better to be alone than to lose someone again so she started pulling away #and lila made pulling away very very very easy to do #shes also vaguely aware she's being unfair in pinning this on alya which is why she started spinning the drain on cockmoth again #legitimately all the shit that's happened to her wouldn't have been so catastrophic if he was never in the picture and she knows it #but the bitterness of her bestie choosing a fantastic liar over her at the worst of times stiiiiiings #alya's personal timing was bad but lila really took advantage of the fact that marinette had been acting off and weird #she basically clocked marinette as being unstable from SOMETHING and made up a lie about her #knowing she wouldn't have the strength to defend herself #between her social life going tachy bc of lila and losing fu in a way that felt like personhood death marinette was really put on the spot #and alya doing her thing of busting in there and assuming her bias is correct was a terrible combo #essentially marinette is highly unstable and alya is just realizing that #busting in and giving her a lecture when she's slightly hysterical and definitely delirious from exhaustion is NOT the way #to show her she's self sabotaging #cuz thats just gonna make her double down on self sabotaging. bc marinette will not accept that she is also a CHIIIIILD

[ivybladewitch]

Realized I never posted this here!

It took two years, but I made the Annie's Cathedral Rose Window Afghan! First time I made a full blanket, really love it!

#crochet #crochetblr #yarn arts #Afghan #yarnblr #wip #Good god that took a long time! #Freaking 6ft diameter blanket

[amaranthsynthesis]

First morning wake up after the nautiloid crash and there are still many questions to be answered. Not by Ballard, though! He doesn't know shit or remember fuck all! My man has the lowest possible intelligence stat without incurring a negative, and also there's holes in his brain.

Had the thought a ways back about the notes you find from Kressa in the Illithid Colony re: the dark urge strangling her with his own intestines. I'm not sure how he was healed from her experiments, if they scarred or how long the marks might last, but my policy is not to turn down shit about durge that's funny/deeply upsetting so here we are. This is the first time I've drawn Gale I think and I love him.

Also:

#bg3 #baldurs gate 3 #bg3 comic #the dark urge #durge #Ballard #bg3 spoilers #durge spoilers #technically? #gale dekarios #astarion #cw flashing #gif warning #possible epilepsy warning #I hope I kept that gif slow enough but better safe than sorry #artings #digital art #I don't want to talk about how long it took to figure out how to draw the shirt he was halfway in the entire time lmao

[isaacz]

Martlet sprite by: @dvdexe on twitter!

#my art #undertale #undertale yellow #undertale yellow fanart #undertale fanart #that first drawing btw i took such a long time on that it's insane #i'm just really tired i need sleep #the third painted one is a screenshot redraw from the undertale yellow trailer btw

[cynderrfall]

Linked Universe Anime Opening

#linked universe #linked universe au #Lu #linkeduniverse #bruh this took me so long #maybe one day I’ll actually learn to animate lmao #Lu sky #Lu time #Lu wind #lu twilight #lu four #lu legend #lu wild #lu hyrule #lu warriors #linked universe fanart #2023 art

[loth-creatures]

🏳️‍🌈BE GAY DO CRIMES 🏳️‍⚧️BE GAY DO CRIMES 🏳️‍🌈 BE G A Y DO CRIMES🏳️‍⚧️ FINALLY FINISHED YEEHAW 

MAY THE 4TH BE WITH YOU FUCKERS

NOW GO CAUSE SOME TROUBLE KARK SHIT UP LETS GOOOO

#swr #star wars fanart #star wars rebels #star wars day #swr fanart #star wars rebels fanart #may the fourth be with you #may the 4th #kanan jarrus #hera syndulla #ezra bridger #sabine wren #chopper #garazeb orrelios #the ghost crew #star wars #be gay do crimes #this took a long ass time #don't talk to me about the letters #eel art

[wu-does-art]

thinking about Nico adjusting to letting himself miss and long for the people he loves. based on these bits from the sun and the star:

" As Nico and Will followed the trogs, he thought about how much he missed Hazel. He was learning to make peace with that feeling. It was okay for him to miss people because that meant he wanted them around in his life. That idea was *very* new for him- he was used to either pushing people away or watching them recoil from his presence." *

" That was the most surreal thing of all... Was he happy? Nico wasn't very familiar with the sensation, but he couldn't deny that he felt wonderful in Will's presence. He even longed for the son of Apollo when they were apart. A funny thing had happened as the two grew closer: Nico suddenly understood all those cheesy, sappy love songs he'd always hated."

#its just. i like that they included that in the book yk. the fact that he prepared a certain distance between everyone #and thus isnt used to missing anyone #so its strange for him #this is probably set somewhere pre tsats just because i like to think it was one of the times he found himself missing and longing. #but it was one of the first times he actually allowed himself to feel that way. #took the feeling and held it instead of banishing it away #also yes letting himself unmask a bit #i like to think he just gets wayyy more expressive with his hands the more he heals #that and he unmasks more!!! more openly stimming!! more special interest rambles!! #just oughh. #anyways this was a huge comic to colour #big fuck you to tumblr who made posting soooo much harder #fuck u and ur updates tumblr #solangelo #pjo #percy jackson and the olympians #percy jackon and the olympians #nico di angelo #will solace #the sun and the star #trials of apollo #they borrow clothes from eachother its real in my head okay #nico canonally bought will a stupid shirt as a joke tho and i love that for them

[payasita]

*drops a dead heretic at your door* Meow

yeah

#cult of the lamb #cotl #narilamb #hi i know you sent this weeks ago but thats just how long it took for a joke to get airdropped into my brain this time #doodles #referencing my own fic would have been too easy ok

[sleepysebris]

ml secret santa gift for @raindrops-on-the-roof ! ✨ sorry for being a week late i have this problem where i over-detail things that were meant to be simple. I wanted to do a silly lil love square comic and somehow get alya & nino in there, and at the time, elation was all i could think about! lol (this takes place in a reality where that was the last episode i watched) Thank you @mlsecretsanta for hosting such a cool event 💙

#mlss2k22 #miraculous ladybug #my art #ml elation #elation spoilers #dark cupid #love square #ladynoir #marichat #djwifi #adrienette #ml leak free #so real talk i actually forgot how to draw #i had to redraw the first couple of panels like five times #i really need to draw more it was very sad and scary #so yeah that's also why it took so long to finish LMAO #ive been looking at it for so long that i dont know if it's even remotely funny #my ml comics

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

finally at that age where i'm thinking i should get a tattoo. not bc i feel strongly about it, just seems like a waste not to. i've got so much skin i'm not using

#feels so selfish like. all this skin what am i saving it for? #open to design suggestions! (please make me regret this offer) #maybe some deep sea horrors. a pretty watercolor of a gulper eel #once saw a person on the subway with various Skeleton Tattoos on all their limbs #i respected their commitment to the theme #but more than that i respected how all the skeletons were engaged in Activities #dancing in a ballgown. juggling its own (and two other???) skulls. swordfighting. being a mermaid skeleton #ANYWAY. the only reason i haven't already gotten tattoos is i just couldn't be bothered #i'm old enough to know i don't have any strong-but-potentially-temporary feelings driving me towards it #aesthetically i prefer decorated to non-decorated surfaces. but i'm not artistic or thrilled with commitment #honestly it feels like sheer laziness. indecisiveness--nay. immaturity!--that i HAVEN'T gotten a tattoo yet #letting all this blank canvas go to waste. tut tut i need to grow up and be an adult and get a tattoo sleeve already. #really i've put off my responsibilities long enough #(in fairness i DID at one time have 18 different piercings) #(but i took most of them out bc they interfere with wearing headphones and/or shoving my face in my pillow during Sleep Time) #(i only kept the nape piercing bc oddly enough it ended up being the most convenient. and the least painful to get now i think about it.) #(neck piercing? no problem. normal pair of earrings? Tribulations And Suffering. i don't make the rules i just poke them with a stick.)