Tumgik
#that ending was so satisfying i love people being mature enough to understand that what they want isn’t always what’s best for themselves
osaevsky · 2 months
Note
hey!! idk if ur requests are open so go ahead and just ignore this if they are or if u just don’t wanna do this request
i just wanted to ask if u could write about any bsd character(s) of ur choosing reacting to a jealous s/o?? maybe them teasing their s/o or smthh? up to you!
take caree! ( ´ ꒳`)ノ
Tumblr media
⠀ wish i didn't care ⠀⠀⚝ headcanons on how they would react to their significant other being jealous. included: dazai osamu, chuuya nakahara, ryunosuke akutagawa, atsushi nakajima.⠀;    ♡
Tumblr media
🥮⠀⠀·⠀⠀⚝⠀⠀⠀;  word count: 1.2k + warnings: not proof read. gender neutral reader, angsty if you squint, talks of jealousy, insecurity, teasing / innuendo in dazai's, talks of insecurities due to past situations, slight toxicity in akutagawa's behavior + thoughts.
🥮⠀⠀·⠀⠀⚝⠀⠀⠀;  author's note: so sorry for taking sm with the request, but thank you regardless for requesting. take care as well, moot! <;3
Tumblr media
osamu dazai ;
appeasing any type of jealousy with dazai would be… interesting, to say the least. if it isn’t known by now that he would still flirt with other people, it’s about to be. 
he does it out of fun, to spite you even: he can’t hide it that he enjoys seeing you just slightly angry at him, taking it out one way or another. just have your fun with him after -if that’s how you want to go about it-, the thought of riling you up and getting under your skin is, truthfully, entertaining.
it’s all harmless flirting in the end. he would not take it as far as seeing you actually hurt by his actions. 
he would not bear that, nor anyone crossing his boundaries if they began to step on them just for following his ‘’harmless joke’’, that doesn’t look so harmless now that you're upset about it.
depending on how you approach the topic, that’s how he goes about it. 
if you decide to stay silent, acting as if his flirting, comments, jokes… any of that didn’t take any toll on you, yeah, he is the one that would tease you till he gets out the truth. 
dazai would feel satisfied after hours of no end, just saying ‘’c’mon! just tell me, love, what’s wrong?'' ''you felt jealous, is that it?’’ ‘’awh, that’s actually really surprising, isn’t it now?’’ 
dazai would do that till you snap. again, it’s just for the fun of getting you riled up before he actually does anything to reassure you. 
at that point, he is much softer, more caring and careful with his choice of words. he drops his persona and all that previous teasing to talk to you, kiss you, cuddle- whatever it might be that helps you feel great again and realize he is not leaving you for anybody else. 
Tumblr media
chuuya nakahara ;
out of these four, he is the most mature one. straight to the point in all the senses. 
doesn’t do shit to make you feel jealous, ever. he would not entertain anyone’s advances, nor would he let anyone even believe they have a chance with you. 
chuuya doesn’t need to say that he is possessive or jealous out loud for it to be noticed by you. he doesn’t even feel the need to say why he is the way he is, or acts a certain way around you when he -or his insecurities- might feel threatened. 
he won’t talk about the actual root of the problem unless you’ve been together long enough that he begins to see the brighter side of opening up and explaining why he feels that, how it affects. 
now, if you’re the one feeling jealous. like it was said, he won’t entertain anyone, but if it still happens that your mind begins to wander off to some unpleasant thoughts about your relationship, or your insecurities take over, he will be straight to the point.
there’s no hiding from him, not avoiding the topic. he will read you like an open book, and it will be much more work if you keep on hiding it so just cooperate and talk it out like adults. 
chuuya would try to understand you, as always. he might be blunt, maybe a little too much since he feels dumbfounded as to why you would feel such things when he has certainly made sure he had done everything right to please you. 
but still! he will try, and he will talk it out with you one way or another. not pushing you to explain any past issues that you might have with the topic, not digging too much till he makes you feel dumb for feeling the way you feel. 
just, the right amount of talk where he gets to see you feeling secure again by his side. and he will make sure to do this every time. 
Tumblr media
atsushi nakajima ;
my boy, he will certainly be the more insecure one in the relationship if you’re not the type to get jealous easily. well, even if you are, he will surpass you slightly. 
those feelings aren’t foreign to him, but the way to solve the issue is. it’s an issue on both sides for him. as if he hadn’t had enough on how to not feel bad for being jealous, insecure, or anxious- now he has to see you going through the same. 
and he most certainly feels bad for you as well, because he knows what it's like, and how shitty it is, but he doesn’t really know how to help you or talk it out at first. 
atsushi would notice your mood shifts, the way you gaze up at him as another persons’ eyes linger on his looks a little longer than usual, on how you hawk, making your presence known after they tried to brush their fingers against his. 
he believes that the correct way to make it up to you during those moments is to place that same hand on your thigh, squeezing it lovingly, his eyes on yours completely as he makes a question, a half-smile on his lips when he waits to hear your thoughts. 
it’s his way to make you join the conversation, to make you feel like you belong, and to make it known that you are his. his movements might be subtle, but they’re effective. atsushi is respectful, and doesn’t enjoy the thought of leaving you behind and uncomfortable, or letting any jealousy take over your emotions. 
Tumblr media
ryunosuke akutagawa ;
fucking oblivious. to everything and anything. 
can’t even put a name on his own thoughts before you two get into an argument about it. yeah, you’re jealous, and so is he, but you’re the only one capable of actually expressing how you feel about it and why it's bothering you so much.
those conversations only arise in heated moments. either one of you both snapped at each other, or the topic was brought up at some point, and escalated. 
if he can’t even put a finger on his jealousy and see that it isn’t anger but something else, don’t expect akutagawa to see through you like any other person would and treat you kindly, and patiently. 
in fact, he actually cares. he cares for you, he loves you, and wants to keep you by his side. akutagawa can see that you want the same from him as well, which is what fuels him to actually keep going with the relationship.
but he is indifferent to higuchi’s tactics, or to anyone else's. he only sees you and he is blunt about it as well, telling straight off that he has a partner, but since he doesn’t really care about the other person, he doesn’t really stop them either. it’s a waste of time from his point of view to try anything else.
that’s why he can’t understand your thoughts and feelings. he did his job, he has announced he has a partner, why are you still arguing about it? yeah, they kept flirting, but he doesn’t care for them, so?
makes akutagawa look like a hypocrite since this story wouldn’t go the same path if you did the same (but that’s for another post).
definitely would be the hardest to actually make him understand why is so off putting to see him being nonchalant on the topic, or not being able to bring it up as it ends up in a fight. 
but he still loves you, no matter what he might say during those moments and no matter how hard it is for him to put himself in your shoes for once. akutagawa will keep trying because you’re what keeps him going. 
136 notes · View notes
chaifootsteps · 2 months
Note
I'm very passionate about world-building, I absolutely love characters who are sympathetic yet horrible people, but regardless still people, and just because they were abused and have abused others, doesn't mean they can't redeem themselves, but that doesn't mean everyone will forgive them either
I'm pretty sure I have a noncon kink, though the sexiest part to me is the hurt/comfort aspect of it, its the pain and grief that follows it, those are so important to me, having a fantasy of saving yourself or being saved, and receiving true love and care that is needed and deserved, that's my appeal (although I will admit sometimes it is a depressing "end" but that's likely cause I'm feeling angsty — I suffer from graphic nightmares of getting SA'ed :( )
writing and drawing these things are difficult and I'm afraid they'll be inconsistent, though I know ultimately I want everything to be rounded off to satisfy myself and be happy with what I create to express and explore fictionally, which feels safe and comforting. character flanderisation saddens me, and for all the depth and potential and complexities they have that not even the author can truly fully understand they deserve to be treated like real people within the context of their worlds/stories if you want to portray very real pain, which would make the pleasure all that more catharic
I guess what I want to say is thanks to all the anons and to you Chai, for all the amazing ideas and observations and criticisms that really gets a guy thinking. good thinking! from simple changes to mature understandings despite the baffling blind side, I'm positive it will get better after it's gotten much, much worse than we could ever predict, and eventually, we'll get to be at peace with these shitshows
stay safe everyone <3
Here's to that! One day this will all be a view from the rear view mirror, and I'll go back to bitching about something much less consequential. Gotta say, it can't come soon enough!
22 notes · View notes
etherealspacejelly · 2 months
Note
ERM
ok so
anonymous bc no way am i showing my url on this Jhshsheheh
so like all my friends at school. they seem. so much more mature than i am???
like even the ones who are younger than me. they're already thinking about partners. and dating n stuff. like some of my friends already have partners
but i. just am not interested in that rn??? and sometimes i feel like there's. something Wrong with me. yk
like im year 9 but. i feel like i should be thinking about this and it feels like im not mature enough that i don't want to worry abt that now
- 🐉
there is nothing wrong with you. listen to me. there is absolutely Nothing wrong with you.
it is perfectly normal to not be interested in romantic relationships, i wasnt at your age and im still not. i am in a platonic relationship with my best friend, mostly because it comforts us both to know that no matter what happens we will not be alone. even if all of our other friends get into romantic relationships and prioritise them over friendships
desiring a romantic partner does not make you more mature than anyone else. having a romantic partner or a partner of any kind is not a requirement for happiness, fulfilment, or maturity.
focus on what You actually want. ask yourself what would make You happy, what would make you feel fulfilled and satisfied with your life. set aside these notions of what we are Supposed to want, of what it is ""Normal"" to want, and focus your attention on yourself. this is your life, and you owe it to yourself to follow your own path.
i think it would help you to research aspec identities, especially aromantic ones, and talk to aromantic people about their experiences. you might not be aromantic! alloromantic people can still have no desire to be in romantic relationships, and that is perfectly fine and normal. and likewise aromantic and arospec people can want to be in romantic relationships despite their lack of romantic attraction. what i think researching this community will do for you is show you that romance is not the be all and end all of human beings. it is not a requirement for existing and being happy.
i think even progressive parents can fall into this trap of telling their kids "when you grow up and get a girlfriend or a boyfriend" or "when you get married to your spouse", and like, yea its great that they arent assuming you will be straight, but they are still placing the expectation on you to Want a romantic relationship and that you will have one no matter what. and that doesnt have to be the case!
your "happily ever after" does Not have to involve riding off into the sunset with your One True Love, it can in fact be a freezeframe of you and your best friends jumping into the air together and pulling silly faces!
idk this is. a long and rambling answer to what was a fairly simple question but. this ask hit me very close to home. i know how you feel. i felt Exactly the same way when i was your age. i felt wrong and broken and different and i didnt understand Why everyone was so excited about dating and kissing and relationships. so. im telling you what i wish someone would have told me.
take a deep breath. and let go. you dont need to have it all figured out Right Now. you can in fact just enjoy life as it happens! you dont have to know exactly what you want at this age. you can figure it out as you go. you have So Much Life ahead of you to learn and grow make mistakes and change your mind and figure things out and just. live.
the world wont end if you never want a romantic relationship. life will go on. you will find out what Really matters to you. and thats the beauty of being alive! please do not force yourself to do anything you dont Really want to do, just because thats what it feels like you're Supposed to do.
you are unique and beautiful and so so alive. you are doing just fine, and im so proud of you. you belong here.
you are loved.
14 notes · View notes
ben-talks-art · 7 months
Text
Kindness, Strength, and Morals
Tumblr media
This is probably going to be a very messy post since my thoughts and feelings towards the topic are kinda all over the place and I don't think I have the necessary amount of maturity and insight towards the subject to provide a satisfying conclusion... But I still wanna try talking about it anyway cause I feel this could be interesting to discuss.
So, basically, I've been thinking about how certain pieces of different media try to showcase depictions of bullying, abusers, victims, misuse of power, the consequences of one's actions on others, and so on, and all the different ways they each try to offer a, quote on quote, solution to the problem, and which of these solutions I, an outsider who really hasn't suffered THAT much abuse through life, like more or like less and why.
Naturally, my perspective is probably not gonna be as helpful as that of an actual victim or someone who closely studies these things as part of their job, but I still would like to take a moment to go "This is what the media I'm consuming is making me think about" and wonder if they're doing an actual good job and talking about these things.
Tumblr media
So the first thing that kinda sparked my desire to discuss this was the movie Encanto.
For those who never saw it, Encanto is a movie about this one teen, Mirabel, who's the only member of her super-powered family who doesn't have powers, and due to that, her and certain members of her family tend to make her feel like she has less value than them.
Through some shenanigans, personal journey, and magic events revolving around helping their magic house that got sick, she ends up accepting that she has as much value as everyone even if she can't do all the stuff they can do, and by the end, she becomes closer than ever with her family.
Now, this is a nice message and all, to teach people who feel like they're less that they are just as much as anyone else, and that even if you feel powerless you are still strong enough to do what matters most for those that need you, be it your loved ones, or even just yourself.
The things is... This story brings up a small problem that I often see a lot for these types of plots, that being, the victim of the situation is usually the one that needs to save themselves.
Mirabel fighting to prove her worth is great, but it kinda bothers me that she has to fight basically alone. There isn't a lot of focus on her family members realizing how destroyed she is inside and how much they're indirectly hurting her. She literally has a whole song around the theme of "I'm not fine."
Red from OSP went into great detail about this in a Twitter thread and addressed how the victims of the situation basically had to do all the work of healing herself while the family basically just stood there watching and going "glad you finally feel good about yourself!" *thumbs up*
Tumblr media
Now, the message still works because at the end of the day, you are the only person in your life that you can fully control, so it makes sense that stories will try to show that most of the work to begin self-healing lies in yourself, but not everyone has that inner strength to want to help themselves.
Many people are dealing with a lot of pressure and expectations of real life that are engraved into our minds from an early age, constantly being told "this is how good you need to be if you want to be happy!" and constantly comparing ourselves with others.
It's great that Mirabel decided to go on her journey to save her magic house and that resulted in her happy discoveries, but what if she hadn't? What if the house hadn't gotten sick? Would Mirabel just be miserable forever? Because nobody else was really doing anything to help her.
This made me think that, while I like these stories for addressing the pain of the victims to make us understand and sympathize with them, I would like to also see more stories that show how others could help them in case they can't help themselves.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Two stories that come to my mind on that are the manga "Is It My Fault That I Got Bullied?" and the webtoon "Get Schooled."
The manga tells a story about a former bullying victim that became a teacher in order to help out other victims, and through some twists of fate, ends up becoming the teacher of the daughter of his former bully, and now needs to decide if he will help her or not.
meanwhile, the webtoon tells a story about a government system that tries to directly fight against bullies at school and protect victims of abuse by openly infiltrating problematic schools, finding out who the oppressors are, and basically bodyguarding the victims from the abusers with brute force and lecturing them, and us, the readers, on why their actions can cause so much harm.
I like both series a lot. They both address the struggle of the victims, and what outsiders could to to help them, while also bringing up the fact that sometimes the priority should be in taking away the oppressor's ability to oppress.
In the manga, the main character devises a plan to record the actions of the bullies through multiple hidden cameras in order to expose them in the media and allow everyone to be aware of their actions so that people learn that if they become bullies everyone will know. On the webtoon, the main leads are given authority to punish the bullies as much as they see fit under the notion that they're doing it to protect someone, so if anyone hurts someone, they need to be ready to be hurt too.
The reason I like these is because, quite often in stories the focus is "forgive and forget, being happy is the best revenge, they don't know any better, they're just kids being kids" and so on.
They underplay the harm and lasting damage of being abused, while in these series, the idea is "being abused can scar someone for life, so let's do all we can to make sure the abusers won't want to abuse anyone."
It works under the premise that some people should be given more power and freedom so they can protect the weak and that bullies should have bigger consequences to fear.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
That sounds very effective at first, but once you stop to think about it, you notice that a lot of these ideas heavily rely on the goodwill of those in a position of power for it to work.
Even the characters inside each comic point out at some point "Cool idea bro, but that's not exactly a practical solution."
Yeah, I would feel safer if I knew a good person was watching over me all the time and ready to freely beat up some bullies if I was in danger, but what would happen if all this power was given to some prick who's just waiting to use it to take advantage of others? Or what if they make a mistake and think I'm the abuser for some reason?
The liberty to beat up students or the implementation of cameras to invade people's privacy at school... This is just begging to be exploited.
The risk in putting too much power and freedom in the hands of someone to be responsible for our safety is that we might think we have a Superman when in reality we have a Homelander.
Superman works because he's a man with all the strength and all the kindness to safely protect victims from harm. He's a symbol of the best of the best because he can help and he wants to help.
It's not just about the power to help, it's about the sense of ethics and kindness to use that power well. But, again, that's still not a perfect solution to deal with situations of abuse because... How the heck do you make sure that you have a good person behind the wheel making these decisions for us? How do we guarantee our own Superman?
Each one of these stories does a good job of addressing parts of the problem and parts of the solution, but still not the full picture.
Encanto addresses the struggle and pain of the victim and the lasting impact that bad actions, even unintentional bad actions, can have on them;
The two comics address the need of those who are in a position capable of helping to actually help and the need to incapacitate the abusers' ability to abuse;
And Superman addresses the need for kindness behind your actions so you can use all that power responsibly and that maybe too much power isn't always a good thing if it goes to the wrong hands;
Tumblr media
While trying to think of what would be a good way to mesh all these things together, I started to think about one of the comments I saw once regarding and Episode of Invincible focused on Atom Eve.
Basically, the comment was talking about a scene where Eve's friend ends up becoming afraid of her after finding out she had powers and starts distancing himself from her, and what they said was pretty much "Wouldn't it be cool if we had some sort of way of teaching civilians that they don't need to fear super-powered people at schools?"
I saw that comment and thought, "Wouldn't it be good to have this anyway, even without the superpower aspect to teach kids how to be morally good people, shouldn't we?"
Tumblr media Tumblr media
This brings me to the last two series that kinda encapsulate a good compromise between all these points, "School Back" and "We Now Begin Ethics."
School Back is about a lady janitor who often notices that some of the kids in her school are dealing with a lot of stuff that they can't tell either their parents or teachers, so she talks to them herself... And that's it.
It shows the struggle of the kids, it puts just enough power of action in the hands of someone older and wiser, and it helps nurture the importance of kindness, all by having a story where children have someone to talk to about their problems who can help them, and she talks about these things in very clever ways that makes the kids themselves reach their own conclusions.
We Now Begin Ethics is very similar in that it is about a wise adult in a moderate position of power who simply gives classes about ethics and morals. And again, that's all it needs, just showing that these people in need have someone who can help them.
He gives out lessons for them to think about (all while posing sexily to the camera every now and then because the artist of the manga really wants to drive home how attractive this man is), tells stories and describes situations so at the end he can ask them what to they think, inspires them to communicate with one another and to try to be open to new ideas without forcing his own ideas on them.
Basically going "This is what I think. Do you agree?"
And again, that's all there is to it. Just an adult talking with kids and helping them become better people by teaching them how to think about what really matters and not about what society wants us to think matters.
Now you might ask, "What about preventing the abusers from abusing?"
The idea in these cases is more about preventing these kids from ever becoming abusers to begin with. We get rid of bullies by teaching what's right and wrong from an early age and making so they never consider the idea of hurting others to begin with.
Teaching how to sympathize, how to listen, how to be patient, how to be humble, how to not put your needs above others, how to use your words and think about your actions, how to properly value yourself and how to be honest with your feelings.
It's not a perfect solution, especially for those who are already too far gone, but just being there for someone who needs to talk honestly does wonders to help one another.
A lot of bullies are just people with many negative thoughts who never had someone to help them properly deal with these thoughts, mostly because a lot of adults really struggle to understand kids and teens, and in both these series, the protagonists are great examples of adults who know exactly how to use their words to reach the point they need to reach for those that need to listen to it.
Tumblr media
There are a lot of stories about people wanting to help out others, but they kinda make it look easier than it actually is, which is not bad as it motivates you to be more open to the idea of being selfless and more being there for others... But you need to know what you're doing so you won't cause more harm than good.
If I was in Encanto and were to try and talk with Mirabel to convince her she's as special as anyone in her family, what would I say?
If I was one of the teachers fighting bullies in Get Schooled, how would I know when to hold back and stop fighting? How would I know which resources are going too far?
If I was Superman, how would I make people know they can trust me so they can come to me for help?
It's not just about understanding the victim's struggle like in Encanto, it's not just about being strong enough to protect the victim like in Get Schooled, It's not about having enough kindness in your heart to want to help, it is about being mature enough to know what the situation needs, being kind enough to want to offer it, and being good enough to able to offer it.
I'm sure there are a lot more to learn when it comes to abuse and being abused, about offenders and victims, about having power and being powerless, being mature or immature, about helping those in need, and so on... These were just my quick thoughts based on a couple of pieces of media that made me think about each respective case and how much I like the way they tackled it.
Encanto taught about the struggle of the victim
Get Schooled and Is it my Fault taught about the need of empowering those that can help and depowering those that can harm
My Adventures with Superman teaches about the significance of real good intentions when wanting to help
And School Back and We Begin Ethics taught how even something as simple as just knowing how to talk to others can have a great positive effect on others
This is all very surface-level discussion around each topic, of course, but it's still interesting to see how writers try to talk about it at all.
(Edit, these were all feelings I had before learning about the recent events regarding Get Schooled 😓 I'm deeply sorry for having promoted a series that carried so much ill will inside of it. This post literally aged like milk in a matter of days...)
25 notes · View notes
sitp-recs · 3 months
Text
Tumblr media
HP Rec Fest, Day 17
It’s sad hours at @hprecfest! Or is it 😏 I trust there will be enough heartbreaking recs to keep us occupied this Christmas and I’m curious to see everyone’s picks, but I’ve struggled a bit with today’s prompt because I rarely cry with fic. For some reason it’s easier to make me cry with a happy yet tenderly devastating ending (hello Far From the Tree, ty for forever ruining me 🥹) than with a tradicional h/c or MCD tag. Taking my personal experience into account, I’ve decided that it made more sense to rec happy fics that got me so emotional I had to take a break and have a little cry, instead of unhappy fics that left me miserable and in pain. I hope that’s okay and that my choice to go for “tears of joy” will still resonate with others!
Day 17) a fic that made me cry:
Drarry
Life goes not backward by @shealwaysreads (T, 9k)
Harry still isn’t used to gifts, but this one is different. A story of coming home, finding safe ground, and the wild courage of putting down roots. Leaving one life behind isn’t always a sacrifice, and sometimes the greatest good comes from embracing the people you love.
one of my go-to comfort reads, the nut baby fic (affectionate) holds a special place in my heart. I was going through a rough time when I first read it and the experience was as magical as the fae magic in it. this is a tender and beautiful portrayal of mature, patient, healing love; Harry and Draco share so much trust and mutual understanding it’s impossible not to feel moved by their journey. there’s intimacy and affection every step of the way and somehow Bella was able to tell the love story of a lifetime within 10k and without ever making it feel rushed, boring or forced. the moment they name the 🥜 baby will stay forever imprinted in my mind as one of the most poignant and beautiful scenes I’ve ever read in fic 🥹
Rare pair
Black Forest by @ruinsplume and @saintgarbanzo (Sirius/Harry/Remus, E, 12k)
In which Harry has a nightmare (or says he does), Remus wants no part in this (until he does), and Sirius enjoys being the most functional person in the room (for once).
okay so I lied because a very small portion of the tears I shed with this story were actually joyful; most of it was angsty af, full of grief and sorrow and love for Harry. I don’t normally read this triad and the hot tenderness of it felt like a punch to the solar plexus; I went for the smutty smut and stayed for the catharsis (a trademark of both authors I should say) and it was brutal, unexpected and satisfying all at once. Harry’s broken pov is visceral and heart-wrenching and beautifully constructed, but beyond all the hurt there’s so much comfort in knowing that Sirius and (eventually) Remus figure out exactly what he needs *cries* i just want Harry to feel seen, safe and loved and few fics convinced me that’s what he got. this is one of them. I am a slut for fics that convey complex, nuanced character studies through (hothothot) smut and this fic does it brilliantly, it’s so cathartic and moving. healing sex doesn’t get any better than this!
18 notes · View notes
seidooreiki · 2 months
Text
Tell Me That You Love Me Episode 15-16
The review of the last two episodes of Tell Me That You Love Me
So, finally, I gathered enough bravery to watch the last two episodes, fearing that the show would end up with bad end.
Thankfully, it isn't. Unfortunately, it ended like how I expected it to be. The damn time skip.
But, who am I to complain? I'm satisfied enough that the show doesn't end with a bad ending. That's enough.
So, the last two episodes totally… destroyed me.
I cried like I was the one who got brokenhearted.
In that scene where Jin Woo cries and calls Mo Eun's name in his hoarse voice, it is such a shame that Mo Eun didn't hear it.
I think the core of the problem between Mo Eun and Jin Woo is that… Jin Woo's lack of conveying his feelings to Mo Eun. Like the title of the show, Tell Me That You Love Me. Of course, it started because of Jin Woo's lack of communication about what happened with his past lover, but after that, Mo Eun felt lonely because she felt like she was the only one who loved him, and he didn't return her feelings.
Of course, Jin Woo has his own way of loving Mo Eun and he is the type who shows his affection through actions. But, even that was so subtle to see and Mo Eun needs to squint her eyes to understand the meaning of all of Jin Woo's subtle expressions of love. She could think that Jin Woo doing all of that because he was being nice, not necessarily because he loved her. The more she was in doubt, the more she failed to see Jin Woo's language of love.
And Jin Woo, mostly, acted so passively. There was a lot of waiting on his end because he was always walking on eggshells. Their love was mature, but maybe, it was also too quiet. Compared to the other love stories in this drama, their love is too quiet and Mo Eun became lonely because of that.
Of course, it isn't good for her to start wishing to have something that Jin Woo can't do, and that is exactly why she berated herself in the end. It isn't easy to love Jin Woo, who is scarred and carries a lot of baggage on his end. It isn't weird for Mo Eun to feel saddened and lonely because of she started to lost her believe that Jin Woo loved her back.
This drama could end better if they could communicate better, for Mo Eun to convey why she felt lonely (though I understand that she also didn't have the heart to ask Jin Woo to convey his love to her in a more apparent way because Jin Woo's language of love is simply different, that is just how he is) and for Jin Woo to understand that he did deserve people to love him (so that he doesn't need to always act carefully and so guarded, fearing that one stupid mistake can drive people away from him).
Of course, the damn time skip came, and while the show is shown how all of the characters' life turned out, it fails to show why Jin Woo and Mo Eun need time to love each other back again.
If I can speculate, maybe the reason why Jin Woo acted so brightly after returning from abroad is that he finally allowed himself to love Mo Eun. He always felt like he undeserving of love, so to accept that it is okay for him to love someone is a huge deal. For him who always prepare himself for people to leave him all the time, it is indeed a huge deal. Mo Eun herself, finally understands that everyone has their own way of conveying their love and that people can love in different ways and shapes.
It would be way better if the drama ended with a scene of Jin Woo really says how much he loves Mo Eun, not just a monologue on his part.
But well, again, I'm happy with the happy ending. (And if I'm unsatisfied with the end, I can just write a fanfic for it, if I have enough motivation).
9 notes · View notes
Text
Episode 13
A very mature and thorough episode, I think. They managed to achieve a balance of the three main couples that feels pretty fair and satisfying.
Kinnporsche is in its final stages, just before the relationship incarnation. The finale should be epic.
Porsche was understandably off this entire episode. He was reserved with Kinn because they both had thought that they'd resolved this whole issue about Porsche's parents and Korn, but Scummy Uncle had to show up and immediately fuck everything. I think that Porsche felt a little guilty because he didn't want to bring it up again now that they'd moved back in to the main house and Kinn was no longer at odds with his father on Porsche's behalf. Also, Korn is dangerous, and Porschay is living in the house with them. I don't think that Porsche thinks that Kinn won't be on his side; he's worried that he will be, and that it will inflame Kinn's already difficult paternal relationship, and all that even before Porsche knows fully what's going on.
I know that some people were worried when Porsche did things like pull his hand away when Kinn was trying to hold it in episode 8 or when he was so reserved whilst showing off his relationship with Kinn in episode 12, but I think that this episode has shown that it's entirely a discomfort with PDA and not any internalised homophobia or insecurity with the relationship. Even when they were alone in front of his parents' graves, he only did an indirect cheek kiss with his fingers rather than directly returning it. That's all fine: I like how they managed to completely erase the internalised homophobia from the novel whilst replacing it with sensical character reactions that explain the same behaviour.
I liked the dinner scene with Korn—petty Porsche is great. I've missed him since Tawan in episode 9. Spite looks good on him.
Kinn was being sappy and horny, as we've learnt Kinn is when he's in love. It's as good a look on him as spite is on Porsche. He clearly knows that something's wrong this episode, but Kinn and Porsche are still having difficulty expressing their feelings verbally. I expect that this will continue until the 'I am your side' scene in the finale, which will presumably activate Kinn's horny home invasion groping. Sometimes I think that Kinn's heart is like a voodoo doll of his dick: you get him in the heart, and the dick twitches. It would explain a lot. His love kink is even bigger than his exhibition kink.
I don't think that Kinn felt betrayed by Porsche running off with Vegas. Despite them not talking to each other, I think that they're now familiar enough with each other's behaviours not to take their partner's foibles personally—it's just like after Tawan, when Kinn locked up Porsche and Porsche ran off with Vegas, but they didn't really get recriminatory with each other about it after they reunited. Porsche even left a note this time that said that he was going to come back. Their relationship is pretty secure, so I'm not worried about a surprise tragic ending next episode. Kinn followed him because he was afraid that Porsche was going to himbo something up or maybe get himself in trouble by pissing off someone that he shouldn't have, which are two of Porsche's main character beats over the series. Kinnporsche continues to manifest a mature, young adult relationship.
Also, that ending scene. Porsche is very competent when he wants to be—he managed to sneak past all of the mansion's security whilst they were looking for him, with a gun, and then put it to the patriarch's head. He just doesn't often want to be.
Vegaspete is a spectacular fuckery. The relationship is very unhealthy but very piteous. I'm rooting for it, but Pete needs to be given and to be secure in a lot more relative power.
Firstly, Vegas got hit in the face five times this episode, and it was really funny.
Pete is noticeably distressed from even the first scene. It's a little jarring coming in from the post-sex shots in episode 12 where he's smiling semi-euphorically. In hindsight, the complicated look that Vegas had in those shots seems to be pure attachment—I think that the moment when he stopped smiling is when it hit him that he cared, and he was a little spacey and numb about it. Similarly, I think that Pete was running on endorphins. He initiated sex pretty impulsively, and his expression as Vegas nears in and nearly kisses him in the pre-sex part of the scene is something I can only describe as cockstruck in the feels. He's had some time to process (what I will argue is actually at least a day or two, as I don't think episode 13 opens immediately after the sex), and he's feeling more conflicted without the hormones. Vegas has taken the bandages off, but he's also put a cuff back on, which I imagine made Pete feel pretty shitty. He lost his chance to escape, and Vegas is trying to seduce him hard with homemaking skills whilst still keeping him chained to the ceiling.
Nonetheless, his anguish is riveting, and that scene with the escape is one of my favourite for the whole series. Vegas is increasingly under pressure as he realises that nothing he does can please his father and that he has no control over his own life; Pete is taking the entirety of the emotional burden as well as serving as physical stress relief, like Vegas is for his father, until he implodes with the pressure of being both comfort object and punching bag. The first half of the escape scene is very uncomfortable: this time, rather than Pete relieving or comforting Vegas, both are distressed, and the extent of this in Pete startles Vegas from the routine, and he pretty immediately backs off and starts apologising. Unfortunately, Vegas is still our volatile little miaowfioso, and he doesn't know how to react when his comfort object starts requiring comfort.
They're actually giving me a bit of Spuffy energy, although they switch between who's Spike and who's Buffy.
That Pete escaped rather than Vegas letting him go is good for Pete's agency and emotional health, but it's bad for the Vegaspete relationship. Pete's shown himself to be self-effacing with a tendency to suicidal thinking, and his stress response, like Vegas, is to devalue himself and to self-harm (like Vegas, he slaps himself in the scene before the escape); his escape here is an expression of his valuing of himself over Vegas, which he has yet to do during their interactions, usually giving in and comforting Vegas instead. However, Vegas didn't let Pete go, and so showed that he wasn't willing to prioritise Pete over himself as Pete was doing for him—the relationship is then one-sided and selfish, and, with Vegas so volatile, very dangerous for Pete. This dynamic does leave us with an interesting relationship trajectory that compensates for how quickly and easily the first half of their engagement seemed to happen (albeit a little only because of the dearth of scenes). It also brings their relationship out of the bubble and into the real world in a way that parallels episode 8–11 for Kinnporsche.
In fact, a lot of parallels are happening between these four:
Porsche and Pete or Kinn and Vegas
In this episode, Pete expresses a carpe diem philosophy, which is the same as Porsche's as expressed in episode 3. Pete and Porsche are similar in a few ways, which is probably why they're so good at being friends: they have work and leisure faces; they're good at understanding each other; they like to have the same sorts of simple fun; they're amiable, make friends easily, and are a little silly sometimes; they shrug off of a lot of things easily (used to operating under the strictures of the powerful); and they're both duty-bound. Their hand-to-hand combat scene in episode 10 is without angst because they're not actually opposed to each other in that scene, and Pete and Porsche have never actually been in proper conflict. They get along well and they're protective of each other, and this might get them, as well as Kinn and Vegas, through the confrontation of the major and minor families in the finale.
The scene in the bathroom this episode directly parallels their bathroom scene in episode 5. This time, it's Pete that's conflicted about a dubiously-consensual and possibly-regrettable sexual encounter, and I think that Porsche recognises the signs: Pete's pleading to pretend that everything is fine and Pete's body language are so similar to Porsche's after the drugged-up sex, and this is all besides the pretty incriminating lash marks and bruised wrists; you can see on his face that he's recognising trauma and a sense of violation, if not precisely that Pete's distressed over a sexual encounter. This show continues to be really well done in its portrayal of the trauma of sexual assault and dubiously consensual sex.
The platonic wound-tending is a nice trope subversion, and it extends the series' general tendency to allow genuine emotional vulnerability to the male characters (a contrast to most other BLs where emotional vulnerability is a feminising behaviour pervading the bottom's character and/or something only to be permitted in breakup scenes or when the characters are in danger of death). It's a little ironic that the machismo is lesser in the mafia show than in university dramas.
Both of these bathroom scenes were followed by Tankhun taking them down to Yok's , and both times Vegas showed up afterwards—you can compare and contrast his genuine and ingenuine seduction tactics. With Pete, he shows up empty handed and unprepared, and he even resorts to reusing a basic tactic, appearing from the aether, lighter in hand. Unlike Porsche in both his version of Vegas' Yok-crashing and of Vegas' lighter-offering scene, Pete responds hostilely and pulls a gun.
Although, Vegas showing up can also be phrased as a contrast, since Kinn (as the love interest and perpetrator) didn't show up for Porsche, but Vegas (as the love interest and perpetrator) did show up for Pete. Vegas is here a lot more dependent on Pete than Kinn was willing to allow himself to be on Porsche; he's also admitted this to himself and he's a mess over it, in a way that Kinn remained in denial over for a while longer. Pete's hostile reaction and then surrender is something like Porsche's challenge to Kinn after he returned home to find Kinn asleep on the sofa, his flight home, and then his fond and easy forgiveness of Kinn once he genuinely apologised.
Pete appears to be more emotionally aware than Porsche—which is a bit ironic since Pete is the one better able to disguise his emotions. Porsche responds by suppressing and marinating in his emotions and both wallowing and trying not to think about them, all of which is very obvious to everyone around him; whilst Pete seems to know what he's feeling and that it's bad, and he doesn't deny it at all, but he's better at fronting an appearance of being fine to others. Miserable distress impedes Pete's function less than Porsche.
Vegas and Kinn are both trying for their domestic era. I wonder if they also got malewifing lessons alongside their hand-to-hand combat and marksmanship lessons? Did Daddy Chan give them? Maybe it was an elective option that replaced wilderness survival?
[I would love for Daddy Chan to have hosted a cooking class and a providing-emotional-comfort class for all the Theerapanyakul heirs: Tankhun was best at emotional comfort, but he didn't test so well because he spaced out a lot and was always reading fashion magazines, and he only got an okay grade in cooking because he kept adding too many sprinkles and making his bodyguards help him; Kinn got a passing grade in cooking and the best grades in emotional comfort, although he still got graded down a little for his horny pickup lines; Kim almost failed in emotional comfort, but he pulled up to a D because of how smooth and charismatic he was in pickup-line delivery; Vegas came second-best in emotional comfort because of his technical perfection but apparent complete lack of authenticity, but he came first in cooking (he was so pleased about beating Kinn, but his father still backhanded him because it was in cooking instead of money-laundering or something); Macau slept through both classes, failed them, and had to retake them, but he slept through and failed them again, at which point Daddy Chan gave up. Anyway, I digress.]
Porsche thought that Pete was a ghost for a second. I really like how he poked him. At least he seems to have learned that ghosts are intangible since that time he kicked Pol during horror movie night.
Kinn and Pete or Vegas and Porsche
The scene where Kinn and Pete come across Porsche and Vegas with Porsche's scummy Uncle's corpse parallels Kinn and Pete being the ones to run into Porsche escaping with Vegas. They're the ones with the brain cells running after the idiots. Here, they seem to have teamed up to attempt to rein in their awol lovers.
Kinn and Pete are sort of inversions in relationships also: Kinn keeps his cock in his heart, and Pete keeps his heart in his cock.
And then we have Vegas and Porsche as the awol idiots. Vegas is trying to be good, which to him means that he's trying to do the opposite of whatever he'd normally do. The issue is that Vegas is normally smart-evil, and the opposite of that is dumb-good, so he's now just sort of loafing around and trying to figure out how to emote without committing battery or homicide. I understand that it's difficult for him.
Porsche has definitely learned from his past actions, and his actions don't not make sense: he's leaving Kinn out of it in an attempt to avoid friction with the scary mafia boss who has demonstrably and repeatedly lied to them, but who is also Kinn's father. It's still a little stupid and definitely complicating things in a way that it doesn't have to and in a way that will almost certainly fuck up a few plot points, even if it won't fuck up his relationship.
I kind of actually want to see Porsche and Vegas on some type of frenemy-bromance revenge murder roadtrip on a motorbike with Pete and Kinn tracking and following along behind them and bribing off all the police officers and baffled/terrified witnesses that they attract. That would be very funny.
Kimchay is progressing sweetly, smoothly, and on-track for a BL. It's playing it straight, but it still comes off as more genuine than a lot of the university romantic dramas. I'm still not quite sure how they managed that.
Chay is emotionally withdrawing. He at least seems to have stopped self-destructing, but he's done some sensible things like staying awake from the drugs, blocking his dickhead ex, and taking down the shrine.
Kim is very taciturn, as usual, but the reveal of the polaroid stash helps to flesh out the Kimchay relationship a little and properly shows that the relationship wasn't parasocial or unrequited on Kim's part. I also like how the polaroid stash mirrors the Wik shrine. Kim smiling like he'd been stabbed in the heart whilst looking at the photos and flashbacking was the most emotionally vulnerable we've yet seen him, and I think it's the peak of his realisation that he's fucked up. I was a little worried because of how the relationship started, because of how Kim avoided returning Chay's 'I love you,' and because they showed us so little of the relationship development, but that all seems to be because Kim prefers to sing rather than to talk, and he's aware of how strange it would be for him to do that out of the blue, so he just keeps his mouth shut.
I posit that it's not Chay, but Kim that is the Disney princess—his ideal world would be one where he can sing out his feelings at will. Chay is one of the little bluebirds that accompanies his singing and comes along to help him dress, but who then turns out to be a charming youngest son under a curse.
I do want to know why Kim got recalled in by Korn just as he was about to jet off. It's a similar framing as to how Kinn was pulled away to a meeting with Korn just as Porsche was about to tell him about scummy Uncle and the reveal of the lie, and then Korn ended up being creepily lenient and ominously offering a holiday. I wonder if it's a similar thing? Korn talking to the respective lovers of both of the kids he's fucked over. We didn't see him calling in Tankhun.
Speaking of people knowing—do any people actually know about Kimchay's relationship? I don't think they do (although, again, I wouldn't put it past Korn to know and be keeping quiet).
Tankhun is the voice of reason here, for which he has become known. To be fair, it's not clear that Porsche knew that Pete was infiltrating the minor family's house, Kinn did check with Pete's grandmother, and there has been a lot going on lately with all the dark revelations about dead parents. The funeral scene was great, with the effigies: I like that there was a Yok one—she and Tankhun seem to have really bonded, and I do like that for them. It's hilarious that he burnt a paper ATM as a paper offering, and it's very Tankhun.
His singing is also pretty good. This seems to be a musical family. Someone should write an AU where they're some sort of legacy musical star family; that would be funny. And then Chay marries in as talented new blood, and the odd one out is Porsche, who would be completely tone deaf, but Kinn would always be telling him that it was good and letting him sing karaoke to everyone else's dismay.
Kan and Korn continue to be terrible fathers. Kan is legitimately disgusting. I think that the part of the scene where he deliberately rotates his family head ring on his finger so that he can catch Vegas in the face with it when he hits him is the clearest and fullest expression of his personality. It's also symbolically important—Vegas being injured with the symbol of his father's power, which is also the symbol of their family. Korn is shady and untrustworthy as usual, but I think that there are hints that he's preparing to die? The talk about his health is returning, he's smoking like he no longer cares about his health, he's trying to tie up loose ends with Porsche, and the offer of a holiday to Kinnporsche may have been an attempt to get them out of the way as he sorts out some premortem regrets. I don't actually care if he's dying. Well, I do a little in that nature gets to kill him. Honestly, all I want is some patricide.
118 notes · View notes
earthly-ali3n · 1 year
Text
i think the biggest reason kataang never sat right with me is because it wasn’t really satisfying for either of their individual arcs.
Aang always seemed to be more infatuated with katara than actually in love with her. Aang thought she was beautiful and strong, and she spends all of her time helping him train and fight. she protects him and cares for him, of course he has a crush on her. but it always seems like a childish desire, even in the 3rd season. aang should have let go of katara in the final fight, it felt like kind of a cop out to hit that rock. aang spends the whole series at war with himself over being the avatar, something he never wanted but was his destiny nonetheless. it would have been more satisfying (in my opinion) to see him fully accept the role of avatar at the end of the show, and know he was content with his destiny. Aang had so much responsibility at both the avatar and the last airbender, as well as so much trauma from spending his first year conscious after being frozen for 100 years immediately fighting and training in the war. for him to end the show in a relationship, and achieving that relationship being his ultimate happy ending just seemed very shallow for everything he had gone through.
for katara, i really feel like she settled. and i’m not going to bring any other ship into this, because there are pros and cons to all of them, so don’t take this as comparing ships or trying to say one is better than the other.
Aang did not understand nor accept katara. to not understand someone is one thing, but aang would not try to even accept katara if her feelings were vengeful, angry, etc. he preached forgiveness and being the bigger person, but that is not what katara needed from him. aang could never be a comfort to her because he couldn’t accept wanting revenge and holding grudges were valid feelings to have when you suffered what she did. and of all the people in the show, aang SHOULD be the one who understands the most. he is the last airbender, she is the last waterbender in the southern water tribe. the survivors guilt weighs heavily on them both. when aang lashes out in the avatar state, it is always katara who bring him down to earth, just by being there! but aang could never do that for katara. he had to turn it into a moral lesson, he could not help but preach to her when all she needed was for him to be there with her while she got her anger out. zuko did not have to do anything to comfort or convince katara not to give into her anger and take someone’s life. he just had to be there, to back her up and not judge her. she made the choice to leave on her own. she had to make that choice on her own, and aang was just not emotionally mature enough to let her do that. and he still wasn’t able to comprehend why she would let him live if she didn’t forgive him. katara wasn’t raised a pacifist like him. she raised herself, and her older brother. she had to be strong, and it took her looking her mother’s murderer in the eyes to realize that she didn’t have to kill him to be stronger than him. she didn’t need to kill him to make sure he would never hurt anyone again, he was already incapable. it’s the same choice aang made when he took ozai’s bending.
basically the point of this ramble is that i think katara deserved someone who could put her first, who could understand her, and who wouldn’t judge her anger. and aang is none of those things. he is the avatar, and katara would spend her whole life fulfilling HIS mission to bring balance. she was put into the role of caregiver over and over again. it was natural to her at that point, but i think she deserved to be selfish in at least one of her relationships.
edit: i’m not tagging this anti-kataang bc i’m not an anti. this is literally just me wishing that he had grown up a little and showed the same emotional maturity towards katara that she showed him
25 notes · View notes
lafilleestmorte · 1 year
Text
I was SO sure that ccir was going to join my kdrama favourites list but the last two episode were honestly such a fumble. I put it right next to extraordinary you because both shows really had the most nonsense endings possible, given the attention to detail and quality of writing in the episodes leading up.
I henceforth propose a list of things I would have liked to be different:
(spoilers under the cut)
1. WHY DID HAE-E'S BIOLOGICAL MOTHER COME BACK. I literally did not care about her, and we had already explored Hae-e's feelings about having been abandoned in the earlier episodes. This sideplot occupied so much of the last few episodes when that same time could have really been used to flesh out the development of the other side plots so it makes me frustrated. I did end up appreciating the mother's story but it was so last minute and took away from the other stories in a really big way
2. Sua's family. Their endings were so!!! underdeveloped I don't understand how they thought they could get away with that. I liked the scene where Sua tells her mom to get a divorce, because her mom starts to realise that she is mature and not some child to be protected and coddled. At the same time, we don't get to see Sua go to therapy and overcome her anxiety and actually mature emotionally. We don't see her mom face any consequences or revelation regarding all of the BULLSHIT she put so many people through. Including her husband, who she actually did neglect. I think Sua's father had an interesting potential in having been neglected and treated shittily by his wife and acting out in turn. He was quite a socially aware character from the start and I wish they made him out to be more complex than some rich dude throwing a hissy fit. I don't like that her mom got off scot-free and still boasts about Sua
3. Sun-jae's family. what in heck. I don't even understand what happened there. You can't expect anyone with braincells to accept that his mom just GAVE UP on pushing her sons' educations when that's literally been her personality for the entire show. Even if the court case made her realise her faults, it's not enough to warrant a complete 180 with no supporting development. I liked the idea of the parents connecting over the issue and becoming more supportive of each other, but that would only make sense if they spent!!! time!!! showing it to us!!! I would have liked for Sun-jae's mom to realise (like Sua's mom) that her son's actions were coming from a place of maturity and awareness, and for her to apologise. I think Hui-jae going to the military was a good choice, but the vacation was quite forced. I'd also have liked!!! for the mom to have a scene with Hae-e
4. NAM HAE-E (and friends). if the previous point with Sun-jae's mom making up with Hae-e and Sun-jae happened I might have appreciated them getting together a little more. But it feels like they were just shoved together because they didn't have time to give either of them a more fulfilling ending. Sun-jae is sO MUCH MORE than some idiot who is obsessed with Hae-e. Seeing his family issues be solved would have been more important (and satisfying) than seeing his love life solved. When it comes to Sua, I imagined her bursting into tears when Hae-e woke up (because she still doesn't know that it was Donghui that did it) and then trying to become friends with Hae-e. I really liked that it was Geonhu instead that reached out to her!!! He's the friendliest so it makes a lot of sense and I really like the sense of ease between the two of them. I don't know/care about the implied romance though. Finally this last bit. is a tad personal. but we were this || close to getting aroace!Hae-e who rejects everyone and does not date if they had left it at the dinner scene I would have been the happiest girl alive. maybe danji was my aroace queen all along
5. JI DONG HUI. genuinely what the hell. He was my FAVOURITE character for the first ten episodes, even after I started suspecting him of being the killer. My friends thought that it was a cop-out to have him commit suicide, but I disagree, because I genuinely cannot imagine him having to go against Chi-yeol so it was either that or him being dragged into prison screaming 'i did it to protect you!' while Chi-yeol watches in complete shock. But if they were going to go down the suicide route then WE NEED TO SEE CHI-YEOL GRIEVE. Dong-hui was genuinely a huge contribution in getting him this far in his career, and Chi-yeol must have really loved him. I mean, that was the only person he felt close to and had contact with for almost SIX YEARS. I was interested in seeing Chi-yeol process his grief and betrayal and regret in a more prolonged way, because they spent that long making the audience attached to and invested in Dong-hui's character. idk when I saw Hyowon driving the car something in me broke.
I have a singular positive, which is that this was the first show where I never got bored or annoyed with the leading romance. They were so cute and loveable until the end and I really enjoyed watching them
25 notes · View notes
lollytea · 2 years
Note
hi omg i just wanted to say i read sunshine in your smile the other night and thought it was amazing! your characterization takes such an in depth look at what drives each character and i just loved how much attention you paid to small details like those, especially with the big argument in chapter 5. your interpretation of hunter and willow has honestly been some of the best/my favorite from all the toh fics ive read, and it just has such a unique quality to it that im still thinking about days later. plus, how the huntlow was sort of evident and there the entire time, the story itself focused a bit more on them caring for and learning about each other as both friends and people without needing to lean on the romance to carry the plot? it was SO good and well handled UGHHH because your tags were right!!! two kids who see themselves in each other and form a strong emotional connection.. its such a good premise it was such a good study. sry this is long haha just wanted to say i read ur fic and loved it, youre a really good writer and i hope to see more from you in the future!! have a nice night :~)
AAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! This means SO MUCH to me, you don't understand!!! Thank you thank you thank you!! Thank you for feeling like you should tell me this cuz it makes my day so much better!! I WILL cry, I will do it, I'll do it right now
And I'm so so SO happy that you enjoyed the emphasis on their relationship outside of the romantic element because that was really what the fic was all about. It was a direct response to all the people saying huntlow would "ruin" Hunter's character and it was just some hollow "painfully hetero" ship that existed for the sake of cliche shipping. I was trying to show the potential of just what it could actually be. Something that pays respect to both Hunter and Willow as people, as well as being a love letter to both of their characters. And how those personalities really catch fire when they have each other to bounce off of.
Like he had a crush on her from the first chapter but it wasn't supposed to make you think "oh yes he is in love with her. He is her soulmate. They are meant to be together." It was supposed to make you think "Aww this dummy got a crush on a girl after knowing her for a literal day for simple silly reasons because he is sixteen and sixteen year olds are just Like That sometimes." Their mutual crushes are supposed to demonstrate how despite Willow's wisdom and maturity and Hunter's militant personality they're both still kids and are fully capable of being childish and impulsive, without mocking either them for feeling that way. Like at this stage they really don't know each other well at all. But they would really like to.
The crushes clearly grow as the fic goes on as they become more familiar and now the infatuation actually has a stronger foundation. But in the end, it's still shown to be a sweet innocent juvenile thing, not like straight up burning true love or whatever. Willow doesn't give him a flower that means undying devotion or everlasting love or anything like that. It is simple as "I think happiness suits you. Your smile is very pretty." Meanwhile the bond they begin to develop as friends and mirror images of each other is the main character study at play here. It is not so easily slotted into a box of romantic or platonic, its just this indescribable kind of thing. The fic doesn't end with a kiss or a sudden realization of feelings, but rather with them having formed this connection, gaining some perspective of each other and themselves. And sometimes, depending on how the story as a whole is handled, an ending like that can be satisfying enough.
I had a post in my drafts about it but I never posted it cuz I felt I was getting annoying constantly talking about my own fic. But here's some tags on it where I ramble about the angle I was trying to take with it.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
84 notes · View notes
biblioflyer · 11 months
Text
Picard s3e10 "The Last Generation"
I laughed, I cried, I cheered, but I'm not free of conflicts.
The artificial constraints of a 10 episode season are something I really feel acutely. So I'll start off with an acknowledgment: if OG Picard fans are furious, I get it. I don't share your anger, but I do understand it.
Spoilers ahead.
I broadly agree with the creaky older fan sentiment that in many ways Season Three is what Season One should have been. Primarily in that the absence of the rest of the main characters and centering Picard and Picard only and, to some extent, Data, was a disservice to the rest of the TNG ensemble.
A flaw that was rectified in Season Three. However, by rectifying it in Season Three and then committing to the story they were going to tell in the amount of minutes they were going to tell it in, a grim sort of triage inevitably was going to take place. The victims overwhelmingly were the characters and storylines of Seasons One and Two.
That was neither kind nor fair.
I won't pretend I didn't love this season. But I also was aware of and frustrated by what was missing because I am committed to the ideals I started this blog on: these are my self conscious reactions, reflections, and introspections rather than objective truths I live and die by and demand others validate, lest they be deemed "not real fans."
Now I myself will not be buying a ticket for the Matalas hate train. I think there was an awareness that a lot was being left on the cutting room floor to cater to fans like...well, me, and an attempt was made to offer an overture to a possible sequel series not unlike a "sorry for your loss" bouquet.
Should you view that as a fair consolation prize for only addressing Seven and Raffi's relationship with a couple of quips and an action movie one liner? Or literally forgetting Elnor?
Were I in your place, I probably wouldn't. But I sincerely hope we get that sequel show so that proper amends can be made.
Hopefully it will also include Worf so that the DS9ers can get justice for Jadzia.
Although, I am a bit pessimistic that its going to happen even with the overwhelmingly positive reception. Two overlapping ship focused shows seems unlikely unless Enterprise-G is a metaplot driven narrative show while Strange New Worlds is episodic with light sprinkles of meta. A prospect that I am kind of meh on. Season Three proves that you can do a season long narrative and it not get too bloated or convoluted and deliver a satisfying finish, but I don't know that its enough for me to trust the concept of the 10 episode version of a classic Trek two parter going forward. Five times burned, twice shy.
For those keeping score, that's seven seasons of serialized Trek with five that I think were not well executed overall, not unforgivably so, but they definitely had a clumsy adolescence as their shows matured. I liked Discovery season 4 quite a bit. I'm not on the "Discovery sucks" anti-hype train either, but I think the show has rather clearly been showing its work as it has struggled season after season to figure out its own unique identity and to balance that identity with the expectations of the broader Star Trek franchise, navigating the hellscape of the fandom and trying to figure out which parts have valid criticisms and which are misanthropes who are allergic to other people experiencing joy: and its been a messy process.
What also steals some of my euphoria from the ending of Picard is the announcement of the Section 31 movie.
I love Michelle Yeoh, I even like the character of Georgiou, but I don't trust anyone who has been involved in Trek to date, not even Ron Moore or Robert Hewitt Wolfe, to not resuscitate vile late 90s to mid-oughts nihilism and uncritical worship of "hard men making hard choices because the good are too effete and squeamish to do what must be done."
I know, I know, its negative for a Star Trek apologia blog but I hate Section 31. That's the only thing I'll ever gatekeep. Its a violent refutation of the core premises of Star Trek: that reason and decency win in the end and the endless fascination with constructing scenarios where characters have no other choice but to do near genocides, assassination, and other grimderp shenanigans really infuriates me. There are multiple franchises where I would accept that with zero qualms: Babylon 5, Star Wars, Farscape, Stargate, Battlestar Galactica*, the Expanse etc. but they don't have that same core premise that good wins because good is actually how you win.
*Although it got REAL tedious REAL quick because of how excessively Moore's Galactica leaned into this. Which is incidentally kind of why even though I admire the man, I kind of want to see him and Star Trek keep 500 feet from each other at all times. The guy is way too into torturing series leads. Save that for O'Brien, he lives on pain.
So, to recap.
Dear S1/S2 fans. I adored this ending: it was everything I love about TNG right down to Picard saving the day through warmth and decency. But I'm sorry you got screwed. This is not a zero sum game to me. I think there was a way we could have all been happy and it sucks that wasn't a priority.
9 notes · View notes
blockgamepirate · 5 months
Text
The Purgatory event and the new Traffic/Life series happening at the same time is really making me think about my personal frustrations with mixing storytelling oriented roleplay and structured or rules oriented gameplay
I'm obviously not saying you can't mix those successfully, but for me at least there are some grey areas between the two where it just becomes extremely frustrating to me, to the point that I can't enjoy it and often get actually mad about it
(I know, I know, I should be more mature about it, whatever, I'm being mature by trying my best to shut up, at least in public)
Basically my problem is that if you're gonna mix these two types of playing, there's basically only two options I find satisfying:
1. keep the roleplay very light and non-serious while focusing on the structured gameplay (some fudging of the rules for the sake of roleplay is fine if it makes things more fun)
2. make the gameplay and the rules just the setting/starting off point and from there the roleplay and storytelling should always be the priority (obviously some occasional handwaving is fine but it should never be anything that seriously breaks character or gets in the way of what would be the most interesting direction for the story)
The problem is that between these two there's option 1.5, which is where both styles of play are equally mixed, and that's where the danger zone lies for me.
I think the best case scenario for me is when it's option 1 turning gradually into option 2. I'm sort of fine with that direction, because I just love roleplay and storytelling. What REALLY gets to me though, is when option 2 suddenly starts moving towards option 1.
The best example of this for me is the Last Life SMP finale, which I'm just still so mad about and no I have no chill, if I seem chill about it, it's because I'm censoring myself to be polite. They had the perfect set up for Scott and Pearl, the two survivers of the GGG, and Rendog and Martyn, the two survivers of the Shadows and also characters connected through a bond that crossed over from Third Life, to go head to head in a final battle, but crucially staying loyal to their teammates to the end. But nahhhhh clearly what we should do instead is just ignore all preceding character arcs and just do a basic ass four person battle royale round. And then unceremoniously kill the winner immediately after so they can't even do one last thing before they go.
(Sorry Last Life fans, I think that's like most people's favourite season, or that's the impression I have. I did say that I was holding back purely out of politeness. I actually have zero chill about this. I even had to delete some lines that were getting a bit too salty just now.)
But yeah, the reason why I had to stop watching Purgatory on day one was because I was getting that same feeling of frustration because it felt like they were going from peak dramatic roleplay to suddenly doing a random ass PVP tournament with random ass teams. I mean to be fair there is a story excuse for it because there's that eye entity or whatever that's making the players do this in-universe, but still, it was getting to me. I wasn't having a good time and I was getting mad so I decided I needed to quit and hear from others later whether it would even be worth watching for me.
Still not entirely sure if I like this arc, but I've calmed down enough to give it a shot
Just trying to analyse why I have these reservations. And yes I know it's personal preference and most people probably don't feel this way or at least not as intensely about it. I know a lot of people understandably enjoy the variety and that's fine. I'm just explaining my perspective.
I guess it really is mostly just about feeling jebaited as a fan of roleplay and storytelling.
5 notes · View notes
absolutebl · 2 years
Photo
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
quick pitch
Blueming - 9/10
Korea - March 2022 - iQIYI 
Main Tropes: enemies to lovers (sort of), coming of age, self worth and self acceptance, lonely prince, sunshine/tsundere 
Adapted from a college-set webtoon, Who Can Define Popularity, and directed by our queen Hwang Da Seul (Where Your Eyes Linger, To My Star) who historically hasn’t had great out-the-gate distribution but Korea’s NEW Film (AKA Next Entertainment World) BL division (yes it has one) announced a massive partnership deal working with Raemongraein (distributor), Kenaz Translations (subs & captions), Myung Films, and GoGo Studio to maximize local and overseas reach prior to Bleuming’s which may or may not have had something to do with it showing up in full on iQiYI for VIP members. 
Do you have an umbrella?
No but I have a boyfriend, and that’s kind of the same thing.
The BL equivalent of pockets for het couples.  
Tumblr media
Honestly I wasn’t sure about this going in, and I’m still not entirely in love with it. It’s a tiny bit dark and a tiny bit bittersweet, almost too honest to a university experience and first love for my liking. Not enough of a BL fantasy. 
I found the main character, SiWon, pretty unlikable for the first half of the series - even with a believable backstory guiding his superficial behavior. Even knowing that the way he acts covers up insecurities. I would’ve like to see the director take strides to SHOW US the things that DaUn later says he admires about SiWon - kindness, cuteness, softness with perhaps more gentle treatment of his sister? Even his mother? As True Beauty did. 
As is often the case with an unlikable uke, I’m not sure why the seme is courting him at all. (See my problems with the first few eps of Secret Crush On You, too.) 
Tumblr media Tumblr media
DaWoon’s backstory of lonely prince is a bit too typical to the romance genre but it makes for a good contrast to SiWon’s warm, if superficial and slightly dysfunctional, family life. Sunshine to cover pain is a solid archetype. 
Both leads turn in solid performances and by ep 5 this show turned the corner and got really good… for me. The bad guy was really well drawn, all of the characters and portrayals we dealt with honestly and were super believable. Every character was flawed in a different way and I liked that. So this became a narrative about understanding and accepting others people’s flaws without hurting them, and there is nothing wrong with that message. 
Tumblr media
Korea gave us decent kisses (2022 is the year Korean boys learned how to kiss each other… apparently, I blame the unexpected popularity of To My Star last year). There was even an elegant, and very Korean, sex scene. Not to mention a nice mature apology and makeup sequence. So that, for me, I found the ending quite satisfying. 
Ultimately what this show showed us was two characters maturing because of each other and their mutual affection. And that affection was never itself the conflict point (coming out or being gay isn’t really addressed - again, normal for Korea). Instead conflict was built around other aspects of identity, popularity, and self-worth. 
Tumblr media Tumblr media
In the end, I actually really liked Blueming, it’s a solid BL. As is expected of Korea, there’s judicious and very elegant use of tropes, but production values are a touch lower than usual. 
I was delighted that it had a longer treatment than most, it has about a 3 hour run time, which really allowed the characters time to grow. And also grow on me. 
I think I have to give it a 9/10. 
ABSOLUTELY RECOMMENDED 
Tumblr media
(source) 
143 notes · View notes
Tumblr media
➖ Mature content, 18+ ➖ check the trigger tags each time ➖      
Chapter 36 - Spin the bottle. Episode 2.
------Andy's point of view------
Andy: I looked after Congo… looked at Daniel… then sleeping Sparkle… then half chuckling Evan who had just mumbled some sort of gibberish about the stars to himself. FUCK I was horny!!! I just needed a dick… right now!! Daniel…. pst…. no response Daniel… I need dick! Now!! Still no response FUCK!!! I looked at Evan a bit hesitating, then crawled to him and quickly unzipped his pants, moaning surprised as I figured he was actually hard Oh god! I need you so fucking bad!
❌Short sex scene START - readers must be 18+❌ ❌ (To skip sex scene, scroll till next marking) ❌
I licked my fingers and rubbed them on my hole, slowly gliding a finger inside myself, moaning softly Oh god I need dick! I crawled over Evan, planting a knee on each side of his hips, grabbing his dick tight, slowly pressing it against my hole and breathing deep as I let it glide inside Mmmh yeah… just like that…. I started moving up and down real slow, stroking my own dick gently God I love your fucking dick… it's perfect!
Evan: He looked up at me with blurry eyes and chuckled softly, and I wasn't quite sure he knew what was going on, but the light moan that escaped his lips at least revealed he liked the feeling, so I continued
Andy: God you're so beautiful… you stoned fuck! I moaned deep and bent down to kiss his lips gently, and as I sat back up straight again, I faced Daniels dick. I moaned deep and looked up at him with a cheeky grin I thought you were sleeping?
Daniel: I'm never fucking sleeping when you're next to me naked! Come on… open up…
Andy: I moaned deep and opened my mouth, moaning even deeper as Daniel pushed himself inside my mouth and started fucking it gently. God I always loved being stuffed in both ends at the same time! I looked down at Evan, the goofy smile on his face assured me he was still far too gone to understand what was going on above him, and right now it could only be for the best, so I decided to give in fully and let my lust take over. I started moving in wave like movements, pumping Evan's dick in and out of me like there was no tomorrow, sucking him in as I was sucking Daniel harder and harder, moving my hips in deep circles, using Evan's dick as the joystick to take me to the stars he was so lost in.
Daniel: God I wanna fuck that ass of yours till you pass out!
Andy: I moaned loudly and arched my back Do it!! Fuck me!!
Daniel: But… Well… fuck me! He was clearly surprised by the invite as Evan was still inside me, but Daniel enough to just grab the chance, so he quickly made his way behind me, making me moan out loud as he slowly pushed himself inside me Fuck yeah!!! I'm fucking both of you!!! He thrust himself hard against me from excitement and made me yelp out loud from pain Sorry! I forgot we are two in here! Are you okay?
❌Short sex scene END - readers must be 18+❌ ❌ (Congrats, you successfully skipped sex) ❌
Andy: I gasped from the impact and chuckled hoarse Do it again!
Congo: I don't think that's such a good idea….
Andy: I stopped my movements and moaned softly
Congo: Daniel!
Daniel: Stopped as well, and slowly pulled out But he doesn't mind… he pointed at Evan as he got up slowly
Congo: Guys… he's clearly not fully there, okay? This isn't fair… what you guys would find hot if you were spaced out, is not exactly other peoples kind of fetish… so please, let's stop it here?
Andy: But…
Congo: No, I'm sorry… let's get him to bed instead, then the three of us can have a party, I promise.
Daniel: Smiled satisfied as he heard the promise Absolutely!
Sparkle: Moaned softly and rubbed her eyes as she sat up What's going on? Her eyes widened as she noticed me still sitting on Evan's dick, and naked Daniel next to us
Andy: Fuck! Evan would kill me!
Daniel: Don't worry he tussled my mohawk and quickly walked to Sparkle I'll take care of this he quickly lifted her and threw her over his shoulder, slapping her ass a few times as she squealed You guys have fun! Make me proud! He laughed loudly as he ran through the garden with Sparkle laughing on his shoulder, and in a matter of seconds they disappeared between some trees
Andy: I grabbed Congo's hand as he offered it to me, and let him drag me up from the ground. I'm sorry we…
Congo: No… don't be… I understand it's easy to get caught up in something, and I'm positive Evan would say the same, even if he didn't agree with what happened. But let's keep it between the three of us, I will talk with Daniel tomorrow. It barely happened anyway… there's no reason to scare the boy off now when he's finally getting more open towards it all. He doesn't need a set back. So let's spare him this one, right? He kissed my forehead lovingly and smiled at me warmly Now… let's get him into a warm clean bed… okay?
Andy: I nodded softly but the tv room is a mess!
Congo: chuckled softly Of course it is… so… let's take him to our bed instead? Then we can have fun in the bunk beds next door… what do you say? I'm pretty sure we won't wake him up anyway.
Andy: But… Robert is on that floor?
Congo: chuckled warmly Oh trust me… he wont wake up, even if a bomb were to go of! He chuckled even warmer and slapped my ass You run ahead… I'll just grab the sleepy one and join you as soon as I have put him to bed.
Andy: I chuckled cheekily and bit my lip Mmmh… hurry with that big dick of yours!
Congo: Smiled at me cheekily You'll get plenty of that, don't you worry!
Andy: I squeaked and sprinted upstairs, throwing myself on one of the bunk beds, grabbing my dick and started fapping madly. I just needed to cum so hard at that point, and so I did as I slipped two fingers inside myself and started twirling them around. I woke up a bit later as I heard talking in the hallway, and got up as I recognized the voices as Evan and Congo. I quickly made my way to the master bedroom and looked at them worried as I saw Congo assist Evan to lay down in the bed, he was shaking and had clearly been crying. I looked at Congo with worried eyes Did we cause this?
Congo: Shook his head softly No… Evan doesn't feel good about his mom being brought up today… and it seems to have triggered a big panic attack… so I'm just trying to get him into bed to warm him up as he can't seem to stop shaking and freezing… a little help please?
Andy: I nodded and jumped into the bed quickly, dragging Evan's pants and tshirt off How long was I out?
Congo: I don't know? We were gone about 30 minutes or so… he woke up as I tried lifting him, and he just burst out in tears as soon as he opened his eyes… I think he had a nightmare perhaps? He doesn't talk much, he's still pretty far gone… I guess the best is just for him to get some sleep. I did manage to get some water inside him as he cried a lot… I just don't want him to end up dehydrated.
Andy: I sighed softly Thank you… can we lay down with him? His skin is very cold!
Congo: I actually suggest we do, whether he likes it or not… he needs some body heat… so just lay down, and snuggle as close to him as possible. I'll do the same… but to be fair to him I'll at least keep my boxers on.
Andy: I nodded agreeing and quickly crawled under the blanket, planting a hand on Evan's chest, rubbing it to get some heat into his skin, and smiled thankfully as Congo joined us under the king size blanket too. He wrapped an arm around Evan's shoulders, squeezing him a bit, and I couldn't help but get a few tears in my eyes My brave Evan… trying so hard to keep smiling, even if he was such a mess on the inside.
Congo: He planted a soft kiss on Evan's temple, and with his free hand dried a few tears off Evan's cheeks
Evan: Opened his eyes slowly and looked around the room a bit, clearly disoriented
Andy: I spoke in a gentle loving voice We're in the master bedroom my love… it's just me and Congo… please try to relax… you had a panic attack, you're completely cramped up… we need you to relax so you can get warm, okay?
Evan: Looked at me with scared eyes
Andy: It's okay, I'm right here… nothing is going to happen… just breathe deep… I planted a soft kiss on his cold cheek
Congo: Just try to relax sweetheart… I'll stay awake and protect you, I promise.
Evan: Just h… just hold me!
Congo: He smiled at me in a soothing way It's alright… he's gonna be alright…
Andy: God he knew me so well! Those were the exact words I needed to hear right now.
Evan: He was shaking a lot less by now, but his eyes looked tired, drained, and his whole facial expression reminded most of a dog that had been left in the rain for days
Andy: I spoke softly How are you feeling?
Evan: No answer, not even his face changed
Andy: I frowned and looked at Congo worried I'm really worried… it seems pretty severe… maybe we should call George?
Congo: He sighed softly I can't say the thought didn't cross my mind…
Evan: He closed his eyes slowly, and after observing him a few minutes, his breathing got heavier and slower
Andy: Is he sleeping?
Congo: Chuckled softly It seems like.
Andy: I took a deep relieved breath Thank god! Can I have a good night kiss please?
Congo: chuckled softly and dimmed the night light behind him you most certainly can… I'll stay awake a while and keep an eye on the sleeping beauty, just to make sure he keeps sleeping.
Andy: I nodded softly Still would like that kiss though… I bit my lips softly and moaned I'm hard…
Congo: chuckled softly Why am I not surprised? He leaned over Evan and grabbed my chin, planting a few teasing kisses on my lips, moaning softly as our kisses got a bit more greedy in it We can't… not here at least…
Andy: I know… I returned to kissing him, it was hard, we had to make sure not to lean on Evan… but man I couldn't stop!
Congo: He moaned deep as our kisses turned hotter, and I gasped softly as I felt his hand lock around my dick. Was he going to jerk me off with Evan laying between us??? Yup… he was! He was fucking jerking me off right now… omg!! He moaned softly and bit my lips gently, letting me know he was just as horny as I was!
Andy: I moaned deeply and per reflex I started letting my hand travel around Evan's chest, playing with his soft hairs, getting lost in the curves of his muscles and his soft warm skin
-------Congo's point of view---------
Congo: I knew we had to stop… this was already way over line, but the joint was still buzzing through my system, making me extremely horny…. I should stop us now though… any minute now… I should… I moaned softly and let go of Andy's dick, much against my own will, but it was the only right thing to do.
Andy: Pouted softly and looked at me questioning
Congo: I sighed softly Sorry… I can't… I want to… but… I sighed softly and leaned in to give him that good night kiss, fluttering my tongue over his lips for a brief second, before pulling away. Sorry… let's continue tomorrow please. I laid down on the pillow and dimmed the light further, so there were only enough light in the room, to leave a vague orange light over the bed. Try to get some sleep my love.
Andy: He sighed softly but didn't protest, so I closed my eyes and sighed deeply. I was sure Andy was asleep 10 minutes later as I still hadn't heard any more from him, but as I suddenly felt his hand grab my hand and drag it closer, it was too hard for me to keep denying my lust, so I willingly locked my hand around his dick and started stroking it softly. But something was off… so I opened my eyes quickly and looked at Andy questioning… he was seemingly sleeping. I turned my head slowly and looked at Evan… he was looking at me with hollow eyes… the only expression on his face was emptiness and sadness…. I quickly removed my hand.
Evan: Looked at me with the same hollowness, and spoke in a just as hollow voice I'm scared…. hold me…
Congo: So he wanted me to hug him? I was very confused as to whether he knew what he was doing… or saying for that matter. Sure… I can hold you. I wrapped my arm around his shoulder again, and drew him a few cm's closer, planting a soft kiss on his forehead, and as I did, I noticed a hand moving under Andy's side of the blanket… was that Evan or himself? Andy?
Andy: He opened his eyes right away
Congo: Are you…?
Andy: Nodded softly and bit his lips cheekily I need to get fucked… I'm so fucking horny! Someone has to finish me or I wont be able to sleep!
Congo: I frowned softly I think Evan is awake…
Andy: Looked at me confused, then at Evan who's eyes were now closed again, then back at me
Congo: He tried uh… he tried to make me touch him….
Andy: Looked at me surprised Evan?
Evan: He opened his eyes slowly and looked at Andy with the same hollow eyes
Andy: Looked at him concerned Are you okay?
Evan: He didn't answer, he just grabbed Andy's hand, and dragged it down under the blanket, judging by the look on Andy's face he had let it to his dick
Andy: Are you sure you want me to?
Evan: Only… handjob….
Andy: Looked at me hesitating, then started moving his hand up and down slowly as he leaned down and started French kissing Evan.
Congo: I observed them for quite a while, getting hornier and hornier, trying my very best to control myself and hold back. Andy was moaning once in a while, and his kisses had long ago turned more greedy, it was easy to see he needed to cum soon. But Evan still seemed far away and not fully there. I guess his mind was just numb. Of course he was there when he had started it all… And then I felt a hand grab on to mine again… definitely his hand… leading my hand down to his dick where I met Andy's hand already stroking him Evan…
Evan: He looked at me with foggy eyes I don't feel good…
Congo: I understand that… but… is this going to help?
Evan: He just kept starring at me with that same hollowness in his eyes, I couldn't figure what to read from it
Andy: What? He looked up at me with a worried frown, then noticed my hand under the blanket, quickly dragging the blanket off so he could get to look at our hands Are you?
Evan: Looked at Andy with the same hollow expression
Andy: Did you? Did he?
Congo: Should I?
Evan: Just… hand he started sobbing loudly hold me!
Congo: Alright…. now or never! I pulled him closer quickly, and in the same move turned him so I could spoon him. Andy! Grab my pillow and slide it between us!
Andy: He looked at me confused but did as I said, and nodded when he got what I meant, this way, with the pillow between us Evan couldn't feel my boner, and I didn't want to let go of his.. I knew we were on very thin ice, and judging by his sobbing, letting go would be the worst thing to do right now.
Congo: Andy… please lay down… close to him….
Andy: He quickly did as I said, caressing Evan's wet cheeks, planting soft butterfly kisses on his lips
Congo: Are you sure? I whispered the words into Evan's ear, and as he very slowly nodded his head just once, I looked at Andy and nodded for him to assist me.
❌Short sex scene START - readers must be 18+❌ ❌ (To skip sex scene, scroll till next marking) ❌
So when Andy locked his hand just above mine, we both slowly and very gently started jerking Evan off, observing him for minutes, as his sobbing turned into soft moans. I wrapped my free arm so tight around him I could almost feel it was too much for him, dragging him close against my chest wanting to protect him from the world, and as I felt his nails dig into the skin of my arm, I knew I was doing the right thing. He clearly needed someone to hold on to, and someone to hold onto him in every single way possible. I can't say I didn't have second thoughts about it, but I tried my best to just let them stay in the back of my head and not take control. I looked at Andy, he was clearly completely lost in the hole thing, so at least it looked to do both of them good. His eyes was planted firm on our hands moving on Evans dick, and his soft moans sounded like he could cum any minute now, although no one was touching him. Just the sight of us touching Evan, seemed to send him right over the edge. I felt lucky, to have such a sexual partner, although he was quite a handful to satisfy. At least it was easy to get him there, but his hunger was most times almost overwhelming. I love him so much, more than life itself. And I was always a big fan of life. I smiled at him softly as his eyes caught mine, and he smiled back, biting his lip lightly and groaned softly as he was just on the very verge of cumming. Do it! I whispered the words to not disturb Evan, wherever he was, and bit my own lip as I observed Andy arch his back a bit and moan deeply as he let go and came, squirting up on Evan's stomach. Oh God, what a sight! I had to use all power in me to not remove that pillow! And then I felt Evan's nails dig deeper into my skin, the stinging feeling was almost too much to bare, but I didn't want to distract him, so I sighed deep and kept it inside, after all I guessed he was just about to cum, so without changing any rhythm of my hand, I kept jerking him, nodding for Andy to keep following me, and not change the rhythm. And it worked, the calm movement made him cum within a minute. I watched his cum run down Andy's hand, down mine… I have to admit, I wanted him a little too much at that point. For the very first time. His body started shaking a bit as we were done, but slowly he turned soft and also soft in all his body. No more tension in his muscles, and he even let go of my arm. Not fully though. His nails were no longer dug into my skin, but he kept holding on to me. Breathing heavily as if he just ran a marathon. I didn't know whether to speak or not.
❌Short sex scene END - readers must be 18+❌ ❌ (Congrats, you successfully skipped sex) ❌
Andy: After a few minutes he sat up in bed and grabbed a water bottle, looking at Evan with concerned eyes as he sipped it. then reached the water to me.
Congo: I grabbed the water with my free hand and drank a bit although it was a difficult task laying down Evan… my voice was soft and soothing do you want a bit of water?
Evan: He shook his head slowly
Congo: I sighed softly and reached the water back to Andy for him to put it on the night stand again Alright… I gently turned Evan to lay on his back again, and with my free hand brushed a few strands of hair off his face Please listen to me….. I don't know what's going on right now, since you wont talk. But I'm here…. we both are… and we won't leave you, okay?
Evan: He nodded with sad eyes, but didn't look at me, he kept his eyes firmly planted on the ceiling
Congo: I continued in the same voice What just happened here… we don't ever have to talk about it. I will never mention it again, unless you talk to me directly about it. In fact, it never happened, and it will never leave this room. I looked Andy deep in the eyes, and as he nodded agreeing I smiled softly, then returned my eyes to Evan However, you're starting to worry us, so I need one thing from you, to know that you're as okay as you can be… okay? If you can't give me that, I think it would be best at this point to call George.
Evan: He looked at me right away and shook his head softly No… please….
Congo: Okay… I get it… but then tell me… tell us what you need.
Evan: He looked at me with sad eyes, then up at Andy with the same sad eyes I'm just scared… just… hold me till I sleep.
Congo: I smiled softly at him and planted a light kiss on his lips, then laid my head on my pillow, wrapping my free arm across his chest, my other arm was still stuck around his shoulders/under his neck, and although it was starting to get a bit sore, I saw no option in moving it. Evan needed that arm more than I did. At least for now. I smiled softly at Andy as he joined us, gently dragging the blanket over all of us again, planting his head on Evan's shoulder as he laid down, and I could feel his arm slide under the blanket, laying against mine, so he could feel both of us as he wrapped it around Evan. Few minutes later both of them were asleep. But I kept watching them for about an hour, so peaceful, so beautiful, and I kept thinking to myself I had not only one unicorn laying in my bed… but two. Evan truly was something rare and special as well.
Tumblr media
4 notes · View notes
gildedmuse · 1 year
Text
Despite all appearances otherwise, I'm still (like barely) alive. I'm actually all caught up with the anime right now and there is just so much I've been needing to scream into the electronic void talk about. (I've even got screenshots/gifs for most of it, it's just a matter of finding a time when work doesn't drain every inch of my health by the end of day.)
But I didn't stop by to complain! No, I just wanted to share a minor clip from one of the more recent episodes. Nothing big or spoilery or anything, promise. It's just this small, otherwise unimportant, entirely missable scene....
You know, the one with Zoro being so unbelievably sexy that I haven't once stopped thinking about it in DAYS.
Just look at him! That smirk! (Are they sure Enma is the sharpest blade because that smile could cut right through a Mihawk's cold, haki infused heart.) Actually, you don't even have to look at him, that voice alone is easily more powerful than Gears 1 through 3 (and hey, I won't claim it could take on the god-like powers of Gear 4, we don't really have enough material to judge. Oh, here's an idea! Let's put them both in front of Law, see which one destroys him faster. I don't care if Gear 4 is Buggy-Bunny-But-The-Rock, The Rock still has to wind up his punches. But that look directed right at you? The devastation is likely immediate and irreversible.)
Like, the way he starts out almost defeated, the gravity and soberness in that initial "No" as he turns to face this seemingly unbeatable force. He's put the weight of Luffy's dream and the promise he's made to his captain on winning this battle, and taken along with how serious and direct he's been with Franky so far it helps create an expectation we're going to see that determined, unemotional, unbending Zoro from Thriller Bark or his battle with Kaido. He'll probably say something somehow very self centered while appearing selfless with that grave steeliness he gets when he's resolved against all odds like, "No, I have to do this alone" or "No, what good am I as a swordsman if I can't do this for my crew and our captain?" or if he wanted to go with the typical overly dramatic swordsman tone: "No, Luffy is trusting me - to defeat this man, and make him king of the pirates!" And we'd all swoon because even though Luffy's default introduction/greeting/phrase to yell out regardless of the circumstances is, "My name is Luffy D Monkey and I'm going to be the king of the pirates!" when it's someone else saying it, fans get all emotional. Especially if it's one of the core characters who has a reputation as being more mature or is typically more reserved and private or is, I don't know, someone who tends not to waste his breath correcting stupid people who are being stupid because what does Zoro he care what these nobodies think, Zoro he knows with unshakeable certainty that what Luffy says is true and has enough confidence in both his captain and his own abilities that other's opinions aren't worth addressing.
And even though Zoro turning all seriousness and focused marks some amazing moments in battles, the way that at the last second he is staring straight ahead at this natural disaster level foe and that smile just cuts across his face, completely slicing through that more serious mask Zoro sometimes wears to reveal that bloodlust and pure unadulterated love of the challenge is so absolutely gorgeous and perfect and satisfying.
Like, yeah, of course I love when Zoro gets all Business-Only, For-My-Crew-Name-And-Captain and just doesn't back down or lose focus because he understands this is something he has to do and only he can take on this fight. It fills me with so many, many emotions all of which Zoro is doggedly ignoring because it's all about The Fight but in my heart I know it's because he feels so much for his friends that he's decided that this is his role on the crew to act as both attack and guard dog and take/deal the hits they can't. Beautiful.
But man, oh, man, can anything beat when Zoro goes full "fucking brat who thought learning to hold a katana between his teeth and stumbling his way through a handful of forgettable bounties meant that when the worldwide champion, a warlord, a man so unmatched he's become bored of the very art he master just happened to be passing by he immediately thought to himself, yeah, I'm MORE than ready to kick this asshole off his throne. Hell, just last week I was stabbed and nearly killed by some shitty clown but look how that turned out. I can take on anyone, this bastard included. For fuck's sake he's only got one sword. Fucking amateur."? And whose sole reaction to having his chest sliced in half was, "yo, captain, if you've got a fucking problem with me being fucking UNSTOPPABLE speak up while you can because after this, it's all kicking ass all the time."?
Like, man, you are one cocky little idiot. Never change.
And he didn't.
#here#these are my feelings#have them to do with as you please#which lets be real is likely scroll passed them while thinking wtf its a 10 second clip how'd this bitch write an entire 5 paragraph essay?#well this bitch had a LOT of feeling about this clip and this scene and this arc and this show and this boy#(also a literature degree that ensures she can literally just produce full essays with 3 part thesis statements on any subject at any time)#(and will do so just for the fun of it. Oh she enjoys your eyerolls and attempts at apathy)#my thesis is as follows: the combination of natural talents & practiced skill can be seen in more than Roronoa Zoro's swordsmanship however#its reflected in aspects of the character: his more 'inherent' or childish personality and the later learned and practiced mature version#both of which he has nutured to become intense enough that a single look or short phrase can easily devastate the heart/soul#by being so fucking sexy#okay I might leave that last part out in a submited paper but only because it's the natural conclusion implied by the essay itself#one piece#roronoa zoro#wano arc#thought I should get in my actual useful tags while I had room#Zoro has one plan#and it's clearly to take someone to bed after defeating this asshole King guy#which he'll be doing with swords of course. oh yeah so really his actual plan?#swords#but just think of what that means for the after-party#I managed to sneak some MiZo ZoLaw & ZoLu in that post in which none of those other characters are mentioned/referenced/concerned/involved#impressed?#cause I mean actually then I would just assumed you haven't visited this blog before; don't bother looking around it's all this shameless#cyborg franky#king the wildfire#sword smirks#Zoro that smile is sharp enough to stab a man through the heart and the voice is so hot you could forge a meito over it#so yeah that is this post: shameless fangirlling this 10 second clip#I actually have this same reaction whenever Law smirks and says 'ROOOOM' or 'Shambles!' but I assume everyone does
18 notes · View notes
daydreamreality · 1 year
Text
Gilmore Girls Season 1 Thoughts
The ending scene and needle drop gave me chills, what a lovely note to end on. Even though I’m not personally excited about what the girls are, it’s so nice to see them in unbridled enthusiasm together. I just love them so much. 
In the past, I’ve viewed this season as kind of blah, just waiting through it to get to the juicier stories and more interesting romantic interests. This isn’t completely untrue now, but it doesn’t feel as boring to me in this rewatch. It’ll probably move up in my season ranking. This has mostly to do with how well the show sets up the familial conflict of the Gilmores, and at this point in my life that’s the most interesting part of the show to me (all of the family dynamics). Maybe I’ve also become [slightly] less cynical as well, and Stars Hollow doesn’t feel as much of a hellscape as it did before. Starting the rewatch in dreary fall and enjoying the warmth, fun and comfort and wanting to look at this show with positivity instead of getting frustrated with it (which tbh is part of the fun for me) probably helps as well. Under the cut is some evolving opinions from many years of watching this show.
The Gilmores: Not much has changed. My admiration for Kelly Bishop continues to grow. I’ve got this idea floating around in my head that the core of Emily and Lorelai’s relationship and why I don’t see much hope in it ever improving is that they both have each other’s number and neither party is comfortable with that.
Tristan: He’s awful and I will always feel that way, but I actually enjoyed having him around this time for Rory’s characterization. Also, in future seasons Chilton gets a lot more screen time and those stories are generally not as interesting; I think this season balanced it well.
At first, she’s overwhelmed by his bullying and doesn’t know how to react but once she’s had enough…oh boy. Watching her verbally dress him down and not let him get away with his attempts to break her will and “just go out with meeeee whine” is so satisfying. She doesn’t let him push her around or try to “out-logic” her; he’s not as skilled at this misdirection as Logan, probably due to age on his part and she’s a lot more grounded and less perpetually stressed out like when she’s at Yale. And yet, she attempts to be his friend and is empathetic towards him. She cares about being truthful and not hurting his feelings about the kiss. (“I think someone is recovering from their heartbreak just fine.” This right here is what I’m saying about ABs acting skill! Perfect tone.) But even despite her empathy, she doesn’t let his mistreatment make her forget her boundaries. This is the Rory I know and love and who she is at the core. Strong. Understanding. Empathic. Sees the best in people. But knows what’s best for her.
Dean: As a teenager: “yawn, I guess the lead has to have a romantic interest, whatever.”
Last rewatch: seeing and getting angry about his toxicity, probably a bit too early if I’m being honest. The early scenes, not my thing but I don’t need to pick apart every little thing. Now I’ve got a concise way to express what I don’t like about the relationship, put into words after hearing Rory’s outburst at the town meeting: he doesn’t let Rory talk.
Because sometimes you have something you need to say but you can't because the words won't come out or you get scared or you feel stupid, so if you could write a song and sing it then you could say what you need to say…and people would listen…
The “I love you” scene in the car has been discussed ad nauseam but the fact he wouldn’t give her any space to explain herself is what angers me the most. I get that he’s a teenager and it hurts to feel like you’re more into the relationship than the other party, but if he let her talk and listened I could forgive a little easier the impromptu breakup or it could have gone better. But I don’t know, I don’t think he was emotionally mature enough to understand how her upbringing could make her tentative about saying “I love you.” She wanted to be certain in her feelings and knew it meant a lot, and with her voracious reading habit, probably has an idea of what love may feel like and needed time to assess. Him mocking her for that pisses me off. My criticism of him is similar to how I feel about Max: both of these guys don’t know their respective Gilmore girl and have made them into shiny objects to admire but not treat as full human beings. Maybe a bit harsh, but I’m dramatic.
I have no tolerance for angry jealousy which affects how I see this character. If Dean was played in a way that showed more confusion, sadness, or vulnerability, I could have more compassion for the character. But his hair-trigger anger, I just can’t with it.
Max: Alright, this guy is where most of my opinions have changed. Before it was just “yawn, okay whatever, of course she’s going to date other people before Luke.” Now? I do not trust this guy to make good relational decisions. This is my in-the-moment reaction, but it basically sums it up. Good chemistry does not necessarily lead to a real connection. That’s really all this relationship was - an attraction - which is fine if it didn’t involve Rory so heavily, especially since I don’t think Lorelai was seriously considering lifelong commitment to him - maybe as a fantasy, a “what if?”, but not for real. Neither of them really knew the other. Lorelai at this point in her life should have some fun and get back in the dating game to figure out what she’s looking for in a relationship if that’s what she wants, but at the expense of her daughter’s boundaries especially at a new school where she’s having a tough time…it’s rough.
It’s hard for me to be mad at Lorelai. 1) I love her. Just to get that out of the way. 2) The way she gets into this relationship and talks about Max highlights her optimistic outlook, desire to explore and wanting something better for herself - I don’t know if he is the one, but he could be. These are good traits but unfortunately, she’s blinded by them. 3) She was thinking about how this would affect Rory! I hated the moment where Max proposes that, like he’s got this amazing idea he totally came up with himself, they should take a break to figure things out when she was the one advocating for that from the beginning?? 
The scene where Max talks to Rory about Dean at school was so uncomfortable and inappropriate. I don’t necessarily get controlling vibes from Max or that he was trying to worm his way into their lives, but he was so out of line here. Him and Lorelai hadn’t seriously discussed expectations and boundaries in their relationship (which honestly, when does anyone in this show). And then he thought it would be a good idea to get married?? Giant flaming wtf.
10 notes · View notes