#tbh i need to just deal with it and work on reorganizing everything but it's soooooooooo frustrating

[plokoonsdisapprovingeyebrows]

fuckit im posting some Cybertronian caste system rambles now. copypasted from discord bc im lazy, names redacted except for mine.

THIS IS THE OLD DIAGRAM. IM GONNA SHIFT SOME SHIT AROUND IN THE NEW VERSION LOL

also note: this is historical worldbuilding, i.e. the shit megatron and optimus got rid of. just wanna make that clear xD

catboy orion pax — Today at 6:50 PM

ok so to start with i wanna get rid of the summary words

theyre like loosely applicable in terms of how social organisation went but there's enough variation that it was never a guarantee

like for example, the guard castes that work around the well of all sparks and at the palace of the primes were more like T3  than T6 and sometimes higher

and sometimes different places had different priorities so you might get a scientist in, like. kaon or some shit who's T4 at best

jhgfgdfds — Today at 6:54 PM

Jazz is a chronicler, right?

catboy orion pax — Today at 6:55 PM

yep, he and orion are both in t4

buuuuuuut the chroniclers rank sliiiightly higher

there are internal ranks within the tiers (but it’s less like a ladder of rank than a vaguely-defined cloud of midges jockeying for position tbh)

my headcanon is the chroniclers are the ppl writing down history and life as it happens, and the archivists - their caste name is 'record-keepers' - are the ones maintaining and working with that data

the hall of records also has a guard clade that rank about t4 bc they have to, and a clade of cleaners/maintenance workers who rank about t6 and dont interact with patrons. both of these are ranked higher than they would otherwise, and are pretty well off compared to castes that do similar jobs in, say, the global undercities, but they still get kind of a shit deal in comparison to everyone around them. it’s all relative.

red alert is somewhere in that general T4 data handlers' area too

i made a joke about, if you're using the Grid (the part of the Datanet that isn't a complete dumpster fire), you have like a 1 in 3 chance of red alert being ur own personal FBI agent meme

hgfdgg — Today at 7:08 PM

so is Prowl lower ranked than the rest, at tier 6?

catboy orion pax — Today at 7:09 PM

i think prowl might be admin caste level, tbh

the enforcers are like, the vast majority of them are t6 because that's all they need to be to interact with tiers 6, 7 and 8, who are most of cybertron

there will be t6 officers and then there's be higher-caste officers

probably local command structures vs regional

in rise, prowl is in a regional commander sort of position, trying to run an anti-cartels unit of sorts, and it isnt going well

ultimately they fall under the ministry of justice, which is headed by T1 mecha

tbh the main thrust of this system, as it applies to my fic, is that it has like bureaucratic bloat out the wazoo

there are a lot of castes that just fuckin exist?

they do the same job as some other caste or few but somehow they ended up in separate castes, with the different legal status and restrictions that implies, and the caste system as a whole just shrugged and moved on because fuck dealing with all that shit

absolutely nothing about my cybertronian government is an efficient system lmfao

jhgfjgdf — Today at 7:14 PM

I blame the quints

catboy orion pax — Today at 7:14 PM

[cackles]

tbh it sort of came from the quints but it wasn't ultimately their fault

there was like... the quintessons tried to take over cybertron and add it to their colonial empire three fuckin times

they failed every time but it was a close run thing that wreaked an apocalyptic level of destruction and disruption on cybertron

the ppl who finally beat the quintessons the third time were scared to shit of them coming back for a fourth go, so they did everything they could to turn cybertron into a unified state for the sake of better defense

previously it had been fragmented, kinda like europe in the middle ages? in theory the kings paid homage to the prime and took his thoughts into account but in practice they mostly got left to their own shit

i want to say there were like five large-scale social reorganization tactics that the empire used to try and make a centralised single state but i can only remember three of them rn

1) enshrinement of caste system (didn't have an 'untouchable' equivalent at the time, that came later); 2) creation of a state religion out of the bits of the previous religions that played nicely w each other, and 3) imposition of a global language of government

oh yeah and there's a thing called rank-exempt

cause sometimes the Govt acknowledges that the caste system just makes shit Kinda Annoying so if ur sufficiently useful the ppl ur useful to can apply to have ur restrictions temporarily or permanently lifted so u can be even more useful to them

but ultimately the system is just Bad For Society in a variety of ways and nobody’s been brave enough to admit it, so it stumbles on with a chokehold around the Empire’s figurative neck.

#tfp headcanons #book of hours worldbuilding

[tomsrebeleyebrow]

Finding Love by the Nile | pharaoh!th x fem!reader

Summary: New Pharaoh Tom is young and handsome. After succeeding to his father at a very young age, he is now respected and loved by everyone – but mostly desired by the all ladies of the Egypt Kingdom. As big as his harem can be, one particular creature catches his attention since long time ago and now, he is determined to make her his.

Pairing: Pharaoh!Tom x Commoner!Reader

Warnings: some cute cocky Tom moments but full fluff power

Word Count: 3485

A/N: I’m such a sucker for Egyptian mythology since forever so I decided to combine this passion with Tom, because I’ve never read something like that(?). And there is actually a Tutankhamun exhibition in Paris (and I wish so hard I could go tbh), that’s how this idea popped up into my brain 😗 So yeah, we’ll see how it goes!! Hope you like it ✨

⚠️ For the sake of the plot with the time period and ethnic details (Antic Egypt), the reader (Y/N) will have black/brunette hair, brown eyes and a little tanned skin. Tom will also be a bit more tanned. Thank you for your understanding!! ⚠️

masterlist

City of Giza, Egypt – c. 1539 BC

(Y/N) walks in the streets of the city center. It’s barely ten in the morning. People mill in the alleys and the merchants don’t hesitate to scream about their good deals in hope to tempt new customers. Children weave in and out the crowd playing tag, as their giggles full of life mix with the regular morning hubbub.

Always so much life, nothing changes.

This is the place where the young (Y/N) was born and grown up, in a kind family in a modest home but where it was good to live in. But nothing goes as we plan them to be. And (Y/N) still remembers that particular day where her destiny changed.

The old pharaoh left the world of the living to join the Other Side of god Osiris. All Egypt cried its deceased king who reigned for almost thirty years. And all Egypt got surprised to see a twelve-year old boy announced as his heir. His only child. When the boy was officially proclaimed as Pharaoh of the Egypt Kingdom, the population got to finally discover the face of its new ruler. So young but already with a disconcerting beauty. Wild brown hair due to ridiculous curls, but that seemed weirdly soft to touch. Big brown eyes so deep and sharp but warm at the same time. Him and (Y/N) were the same age at the time. She couldn’t stop but stare at him with marvel and astonishment. Both their worlds were different: the rich sovereign family on one side and the servant people on the other. But that didn’t stop the aforesaid people to cheer and honor their new king chosen by the Gods. And (Y/N) did the same.

Then time flew by and (Y/N) is now eighteen. Long and thick brunette hair cascades on her back, framing a luscious body as well as her gorgeous visage, with hazelnut eyes and soft lips. Stride across the streets of the city, on a market day, is one of her favorite hobbies. It is nearly impossible for her to miss this day, unless if her father needs some help for work.

‘(Y/N)!!’ As she hears her name, she turns her head toward the voice.

‘Oh, hi Nana! How are you?’ Asks (Y/N) with a warm smile.

It is “Nana”, as casually named, the old neighbor lady next to (Y/N)’s household. She is like a second grandmother to her and they truly are fond of each other. (Y/N) couldn’t miss an occasion to pay her a visit.

‘Good, my child, thank you. I bumped into you father while going out and he asked me to tell you, if I saw you, to join him in front of the bridge outside the city.’

Oh. (Y/N) knows more than well what that means.

‘Your father is making more and more return trips to the Royal Palace. It seems like the Pharaoh appreciates his fabrics a lot!’ Laughs Nana.

The Pharaoh. Just talking about it makes (Y/N) let out a big sigh. She is not the only one that grown up, the young Pharaoh from six years ago back then has also changed. Quite a lot.

(Y/N) observed his evolution during several visits to the Palace. Born in a modest family of linen farmers since decades, the young lady grown between fields and weavers and was determined to carry on the traditions. Everyone liked their textiles made of linen, including the royal family who put its trust in (Y/N)’s father. As soon as she was able to work (quite early), her father brought her with him to the Pharaoh’s Palace to deliver and propose new textiles. Of course she always stayed behind to let her father handle the family business, but she took advantage of it to observe the new “little king”, – as some people called him at first –, at any occasion. His mother and close advisers were always in sight to guide him at the beginning of his reign.

Still in power nowadays, he is now known as the young and handsome eighteen-year old Pharaoh idolized by all the country. Besides getting more self-confidence, he doesn’t stop and rush around like a madman to develop Egypt. And the people respect him for that matter. But what noticed (Y/N) over the years was, in addition to all that, that he became a true charmer. More like a lady-killer, in fact. He knew that. ‘The Pharaoh is so handsome!’, ‘He is more and more beautiful!’, ‘Did you see his muscles?’, ‘He must be blessed by Ra, God of the Sun!’ All the time. Any woman falls in love with him and, without anyone noticing well not really but anyway, the young Pharaoh created his own harem. Of course, like he would care. (Y/N) noticed with great regret even if she will never admit it out loud the number of young ladies increasing each time she visited the Royal Palace with her father. One even more beautiful than the other, wearing dresses too much fitted – probably created with the linen of her family – and some black kohl around the eyes, they were free to go around the Palace as they wish. But where (Y/N) could see them endlessly was next of him. All the damn time. This is what people call jealousy.

(Y/N) sighs again thinking about this all over again. She couldn’t stop, this feeling is stronger that she imagines. But it is time for her to accept her fated destiny…

‘Thanks Nana, I will go find him’ Replies finally (Y/N) while taking the granny in her arms for a hug, ‘And you, be careful at the market, okay? I’ll see you this evening!’ She then takes her leave and starts walking to the bridge, while waving to Nana on her way.

After a few minutes she catches sigh of her father who is rushing to reorganize some textiles in his barrow. (Y/N) speeds up to help him.

‘I’m here, father!’

‘Ah, there you are (Y/N)!’ exclaims her father, turning towards his daughter’s voice, smiling. ‘I was checking if I took all the textiles to show to the Pharaoh. There we go. Everything is ready, we can go.’

Both of them set off and cross the bridge heading to the Royal Palace. It is around twenty minutes walk on the other side of the river. This is the perfect time for father and daughter to chat together about anything. The Palace is located in the South of Giza by the Nile. The air is hot, as usual, but walking by the water creates a fresh breeze that lightens their steps.

‘I see you’re wearing the new dress you made yourself yesterday’ notices her father, a proud smile showing.

The dress worn by (Y/N) is her own creation. Her mother taught her at a young age how to weave textile to then sew it and create costumes, and (Y/N) took a great liking in it. Today she wears a straight mid-length dress in cream-colored linen she tinted, with the collar and straps sewed in big stripes of pearls. The bottom of it is embellished with some patterns of Isis’ feathers. Her feet are covered in strappy sandals in dark leather.

‘You really are talented, sweetheart. I am so proud of you’ continues her father. He adores his daughter more than anything in the world, and nothing could make him happier than seeing her walk on his steps. He is sure she will accomplish great things in the future.

‘Thank you, father’ smiles (Y/N), ‘Mother also helped me a lot with the pearls.’

‘You are both talented and beautiful women.’

A peaceful silent takes place in the discussion. Both of them were all smiles and little by little, the Royal Palace is appearing in the arid horizon. (Y/N)’s thoughts start to turn upside down again, her throat is dry, her hands sweaty and an uneasy feeling begins to grow in her stomach. For some time now, it was the same. A sort of odd stress that she felt as soon as she was near the Pharaoh’s Royal Palace. The Pharaoh.

‘Your mother and I combined two types of linen to create a new type of textile. I wonder if it will be to the Pharaoh’s liking.’

Everything goes blank around her and her father’s words wanders in the air. Could I appeal to the Pharaoh? That’s impossible… (Y/N) never spoke directly to the Pharaoh, or maybe if she had to present or give some information about a textile. She just assisted her father in his task so she couldn’t imagine getting herself noticed or, even worst, being seen as someone disrespectful to the royal family. And ruin all her father’s business.

But the Pharaoh has, in fact, an intriguing personality. (Y/N) could sometimes feel his eyes on her when she was displaying textiles, while her father kept explaining all the details and features. Or he would just call her and ask her to come closer to “see the textiles better”. Of course it was not the textiles he was looking at.

‘(Y/N), we are here.’

As waking up in the middle of a dream, (Y/N) gets a grip of herself and they in fact arrived. She can’t even remember passing near the guards at the entrance.

Come on, (Y/N). Breath in…. And out…

Her father put the barrow next to the entrance archway that leads to the throne room. He picks some textiles, keeps them under his arm and starts to walk inside the Palace.

‘Father, I err… I think I will stay outside a bit. I-I got a bit hot when walking so I will join you… A bit later…’ mumbles (Y/N) while playing with her thumbs.

‘Are you sure? Do you want me to ask some water to the Phara-‘

‘No! no no no, don’t worry, father… R-Really, I just need to rest a little’ insists (Y/N), showing him a begging look.

‘If you insist, sweetheart… Sit in a shade place and do not hesitate to ask if you need something. You can join me when you feel better’ finishes her father slightly worried, but still left a kiss on her forehead. Deciding not to insist on it, he enters the Palace before glancing one last time at (Y/N) who, to reassure him, smiles and waves at him to go.

Finally alone, (Y/N) moves the barrow and places it in the shade of a jasmine tree. She decides to sit down on the sandy ground, back against the open side of the barrow and head lying of some textiles that make great pillows. She closes her eyes and empties her mind. The jasmine above her leaves a delicate perfume in the air, big palm trees swing there leafs with the wind and some birds sing in the distance. So calm. The breeze of the Nile is still refreshing the air, to (Y/N)’s pleasure. This oasis is a true haven of peace and nobody here to disturb her.

‘At least I will not see him today…’

‘I hope you’re not talking about me?’

(Y/N) jumps and lets out a squeal. She then brutally stops in her tracks of standing up because she loses her balance and lands with a chaotic “BOOM” in the middle of textiles in the barrow. And she hears that same voice chuckling at her. Its seems kind of familiar… That’s weird… Wait- When she finds her way out the piles of textiles – careful not to damage something – and is ready to stand up, she can’t believe who is in front of her.

‘I didn’t think you would be that fearful, (Y/N).’

No, that’s not possible…

Well it is?! Right in front of her eyes is the Pharaoh himself. He stands there, towering her, his torso puffed out and hands on his hips. Clearly (Y/N) couldn’t help admiring that true masterpiece. His naked and defined torso displays a pectoral collar made of golden slab, beautify with many gemstones such as lapis lazuli, cornelian and turquoise. His wrists, biceps and ankles adorn very large bracelets that look heavy just by watching them. About his costume, he wears a classic shendyt around his waist, extending to above the knees and hold by embroiled gold and blue belt. His sandals are similar to (Y/N)’s but more sophisticated with gemstones. Finally rests on his head his shiny khepresh on which the uraeus stays in the middle of his forehead like a third eye. (Here is a link of Tom’s outfit -> https://goopics.net/i/WLDoV)

And it is after a few seconds of total blank but mostly of delicious contemplation that (Y/N) comes back to her senses (again) and becomes aware of what is happening. Panicked, she throws herself at the Pharaoh’s feet.

‘I BEG YOUR PARDON, OH MY PHARA-‘

‘Calm down, (Y/N), no need to act like this!’ Laughs heartily the young king while looking at the trembling woman, forehead pressed against the ground. ‘Stand up, please.’

(Y/N) consents to his demand and begins to raise only her head but after another approving look of the Pharaoh, she stands on her two legs shaking the sand off her dress. She doesn’t dare to look at him in the eyes and her heart beats so hard it could jump out of her chest at any moment.

‘You are an emotional woman, (Y/N). Wait. Don’t move and close your eyes.’

What?

The Pharaoh moves his hand closer to (Y/N)’s face so she instinctively shuts her eyes, before she feels fingers brushing the remaining sand off of her forehand. When they gently slide on her cheek and disappear, she then opens her eyes and flutters her long eyelashes a few times.

‘There you go, you are as gorgeous as before.’

‘I-I, my Pharaoh Tutankha-‘

The aforesaid Tutankhamun interrupts her by putting his index on her plump lips.

‘I already told you to call me “Tom” when we are alone.’ Another quirkiness of his. ‘And please forget about “my king”, “my Pharaoh” and other honorific titles, it makes me feel so much older than I look like…’ whines “Tom”.

He is still a child.

‘… As you wish, “Tom”’ answers (Y/N) with a simple but humble nod, smiling. Then she asks ‘My father is already inside the Palace to display our textiles, shouldn’t you be there?’

‘I told Mother to do the job today because I wanted to get some fresh air…’ He sigh before adding ‘… At least I got the opportunity to be in your company.’

And here is the smooth Pharaoh again.

‘I’m sure your concubines would appreciate your presence even more if you join them…’

‘Pff, they are not really useful to me besides-‘

‘With all due respect, Tom, these kind of details don’t concern me. At all’ suddenly interrupts (Y/N), looking away with displeasing eyes just by the thought of him being… Intimate with ALL these DIFFERENT women.

Stay calm (Y/N), don’t lose it.

There is a heavy silence between them and Tom doesn’t waste time to break it. ‘Excuse me, (Y/N)… It didn’t mean to broach this subject…’ He corrects himself while scratching the back of his neck, feeling a bit awkward and calling himself stupid in his head. And that is when (Y/N) could notice some strands of hair poking out his headgear. In fact she also notes that its way too forward on his forehead.

‘If you will allow me, Tom…’ She steps closer, stretching her arms out to finally grab his headgear between her head. ‘Your khepresh moved… I will arrange it.” And (Y/N) replaces it the right way. She decides not to mention about the adorable rebellious hair, choosing to gaze at them when he will not look.

Unconsciously, (Y/N)’s hands leave Tom’s headgear to slide and slowly caress his face, ending their way on his jawline.

Her hands are soft for a weaver… So soft, thoughts Tom, lost in his countless dreams and fantasies.

‘Thank you, (Y/N).’

When (Y/N) is aware of her action, she hurries to take away her hands but the young Pharaoh is faster and catches them back, his grasp firm but at the same time gentle.

‘These hands can create many beautiful textiles… I wonder what other wonderful things they could do for me…’

He brings her hands up to leave kisses on them. (Y/N)’s cheeks turn as red as she got sunburned. His eyes oh my his eyesstare deep in her soul, full of such desire that (Y/N) couldn’t think of something to say. She is like hypnotized, captivated by this man’s handsome figure and unctuous words.

‘C-Come on, Tom… Don’t say-’

‘Yes (Y/N), I insist… You are much more precious to me than you can imagine…’

Hands intertwined, they never look away. They stare hungrily at each other, like they could devour a one in front of them with the eyes. The only sound heard is the ibis flying over the gigantic garden to go to the Nile. How could (Y/N) even think about THE Pharaoh of Egypt himself being so interested in her, daughter of traders-weavers? And yet, Tom couldn’t look away or even think about doing so.

Is this a sign from Hathor, Goddess of love?

‘Follow me (Y/N), let’s have a walk around the oasis’ proposes Tom and before waiting for any answer, he drags her with him and goes down the stairs that leads to the Palace gardens. (Y/N) doesn’t even protest, she already knows that nothing can stop the young Pharaoh when he has an idea in mind.

Once they arrive in the oasis – that is a private place only reserved to the Royal Family – and walk for a bit, they stop in front of a huge pond liven up with tones of aquatic plants, fishes and birds. Rows of acacia and jasmine trees surround it, as if to hide the pond from curious eyes, but some sunrays continue to reflect on the clear water coming from the Nile nearby.

Astonished, (Y/N) gets close to the pond, full of life, while slowly letting loose on Tom’s grasp. He lets her go without a word and admires her in a loving way. He wishes he could keep this delightful image engraved in his mind until he dies: this woman with a goddess’ aura, the sun warming her impeccable skin and her hair dancing like her dress in rhythm with the wind and the leafs.

I want to make her mine.

Then (Y/N) turns and calls out to the Pharaoh ‘Tom, come see how beautiful the fishes are!’

In a snap (don’t you dare laugh at that word), the young king joins her at the water’s edge. He perfectly knows all species in the oasis, fishes included, but every second is a chance to be with the one he secretly loves so much. Once next to (Y/N), Tom wraps an arm around her hips and embraces her. Both of them, one head laying on the other, admire the exotic fishes shaking and splashing everywhere in the pond.

But in reality Tom and (Y/N) look at their reflection in the water. Both reflections, standing together, bodies interlacing lovingly.

And in a whisper Tom takes his chance ‘(Y/N), please, be my Queen.’

(Y/N) bits the inside of her cheek because it is like her dreams comes true, little by little but still is.

And stopping herself from laughing she answers ‘First, you get rid of the tones of kohl around your eyes and then of all your harem.’

‘Isn’t it more important to start with the girls and then the kohl?’

And (Y/N) couldn’t stop herself anymore and lets out a heartily laugh. Her answer is silly, his answer is also silly. But this entire situation is even sillier that (Y/N) could imagine. And Tom of course joins her and laughs.

‘No, first the kohl because there is too much of it and because I like looking at your eyes all natural.’

‘You’re right. Actually this thing is such a pain that my eyes get irritated at the end of the day’ huffs Tom blinking exaggeratedly his eyes at (Y/N) while approaching his face of hers, looking like a crazy man. (Y/N) doesn’t stop to laugh at him. And she impresses herself and dares to leave a kiss on the corner of his mouth, which gets him by surprise.

‘And then I want those girls out of here, and after we can discuss about this Queen thing’ murmurs (Y/N) still close to his lips.

‘Don’t tempt me (Y/N), I might get a bit too excited and do all that just for you’ adds seductively Tom brushing his lips against hers, while smirking.

‘Aren’t you the Pharaoh?’

‘I sure am the Pharaoh of Egypt, love…’

And all of the sudden Tom lifts (Y/N), making her leave her a surprised squeal, and carries her bride style. Now he can’t hold anymore and kisses her straight on the lips and they both savor this moment.

‘… And I will show you now.’

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[everlastingfable]

Rules: Answer these 92 statements and tag 20 people. I was tagged by @kingofthewilderwest

LAST:

1. Drink: water... this post reminded me that I did not drink anything for the past 10 hours

2. Phone call: with my mom like 3 days ago

3. Text message: from my dad. idk how to cook....

4. Song you listen to: I guess when I was playing Heart of Courage on the piano. For an actual song, the last song on my spotify is Centuries from fob but I fell asleep like 3 songs before that so idk

5. Time you cried: can’t remember

HAVE YOU:

6. Dated someone twice: yes although I wasn’t aware the first one was a date until after 

7. Kissed someone and regretted it: I’ve never kissed anyone so no

8. Been cheated on: no

9. Lost someone special: I don’t think so..... 

10. Been depressed: yeah

11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: I’m not old enough to drink either.... no

LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS: 

12. red

13. gold

14. black

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU:

15. Made new friends: yes

16. Fallen out of love: no

17. Laughed until you cried: yes. thank you lance and kaltenecker that was a delight

18. Found out someone was talking about you: no

20. Found out who your friends are: uh no?

21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list: no 

GENERAL:

22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: I did the math 94%

23. Do you have any pets: no :( I miss my bunny

24. Do you want to change your name: sometimes, but idk what to change it to

25. What did you do for your last birthday: uhh pack to move out of my dorm the next day, reorganize my comics, had an unpleasant/pleasant surprise of cookies from my family

26. What time do you wake up: I’ve been waking up at 6 the last few days but usually around 8

27. What were you doing at midnight last night: sleeping

28. Name something you can’t wait for: httyd3, vld season 5, thanksgiving break, winter break, when I finally have some time to read this book I bought

29. When was the last time you saw your mom: 8 days ago?

30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: I guess like the motivation to be in school? Like idk I’m so tired I just wanna graduate and get this over with I’m just not interested in college. tbh I didn’t really want to go I just did because it’s expected of me and if I want the chance to have a non-retail job I kinda have to get a degree

31. What are you listening to right now: the keyboard clacking sound

32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: I don’t think so

33. Something that is getting on your nerves: the voltron fandom always gets on my nerves. Personally, probably just my current need to like figure out who I am? Like this is so annoying what’s my sexual orientation? That’s something I’m constantly thinking about and it just bothers me because I keep switching around between completely and totally ace to possibly hetero, maybe bi??? girls seem cool idk I can’t ignore it and there’s also the fact that I read this one fic of child!keith being autistic and that’s thrown me into a loop because I relate to those events so much but I’m not... or I don’t think I am. Even then obviously it’s not something that causes an issues for me but I just want answers

34. Most visited website: tumblr, facebook, youtube, a03

35. Mole/s: uh there’s one on my thigh. google isn’t answering my question if moles can just be a dot like you don’t feel it it’s just a dif color on my skin

36. Mark/s: there’s a very faded scar on my left leg from when I slipped on algae and fell into a river, and another faded scar on my right foot when I stepped on glass

37. Childhood dream: I wanted to be a writer at one point, also a chef, and a graphic designer

38. Hair color: dark brown

39. Long or short hair: long. I kinda want to try short hair but that’s something I’ve never done before and I’m scared I’d hate it. I don’t want to wait for it to grow out if I do

40. Do you have a crush on someone: irl, maybe?? fictional characters tend to be more of squishes: keith, matt, hunk, shiro when he’s not unknowingly sabotaging the team

41. What do you like about yourself: haha

42. Piercings: no

43. Blood type: O+

44. Nicknames: I think frosty is the only one that’s ever stuck. There’s been a few that people have tried to give me but they didn’t work

45. Relationship status: single

46. Zodiac: taurus and I hate how everything about it is food

47. Pronouns: she/her

48. Favorite TV Show: voltron 

50. Right or left hand: right

51. Surgery: do wisdom teeth count?

52. Hair dyed in different color: I want to but I’m afraid I’ll hate it

53. Sport: no

55. Vacation: so many places tbh. I want to go to the northwest of the US (Seattle, Portland, Vancouver, I only know popular cities...) I also really want to visit Europe SO BADLY especially the Norwegian area, also South America I want to see the Amazon rain forest and the Galapagos Islands

56. Pair of trainers: yes. idk how to answer this

MORE GENERAL: 

57. Eating: what is this asking? am I eating right now? no. what do I want to eat? I have a uncrustables pbj sandwich sitting in front of me I’m waiting for it to defrost. I also have taiwanese sausages I’m waiting to defrost and cook. what’s my favorite food? like any variations of sushi, particularly poke bowls

58. Drinking: yoooo the only good part about the holidays is egg nog. I’m probably gonna finish the half-gallon I bought two days ago today

59. I’m about to: keep answering these. I should also study for a test tomorrow

62. Want: money? to not be tired? to have some free time where I’m not stressed about what I’ll have to do later? 

63. Get married: no but I do want to organize a wedding. seems fun

64. Career: idk man. right now I’m just going with my dream from high school which was to work at dreamworks but idk how

65. Hugs or kisses: hugs, but I feel like a lot of hugs I’ve gotten just don’t feel nice

66. Lips or eyes: eyes

67. Shorter or taller: majority if not all of my friends are shorter than me and I’ve gotten used to that to the point where I cannot deal with people taller than me

68. Older or younger: same thing. I’m usually the youngest so just being older than people is ???? also I think being the youngest prevents me from comparing myself to others? because they’re older so of course they would be “ahead” of me in life. so less stress

70. Nice arms or nice stomach: I’m weak for arms

71. Sensitive or loud: ??

72. Hook up or relationship: no

73. Troublemaker or hesitant: is this in terms of relationships I’m so confused. I guess just platonically, both? I’d like to be friends with someone who’s willing to do crazy things because that’s usually exciting, but at the same time someone who knows when to restrain themselves

HAVE YOU EVER:

74. Kissed a Stranger: no

75. Drank hard liquor: no

76. Lost glasses/contact lenses: yes

77. Turned someone down: I think

78. Sex on the first date: no

79. Broken someone’s heart: maybe?? it’s more likely I just upset them

80. Had your heart broken: no

81. Been arrested: no

82. Cried when someone died: no

83. Fallen for a friend: idk

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

84: Yourself: no

85. Miracles: mmmm

86. Love at first sight: not really. It just doesn’t seem plausible to me

87. Santa Claus: sure

88. Kiss on the first date: for me personally, no

OTHER: 

90. Current best friend name: I can’t just have one best friend.... peach & percy

91. Eye color: they’ve been described as black holes before

92. Favorite movie: httyd obvs

I tag: @peachdoxie, @lastronaut, @zhe-lazy-fox, @tanyasm10, @stratoc, @palions, @emkayohh, @frxstguardian, @howdomaddie, anyone else who sees this and wants to do it. 

#personal #tagged

[kiseki-the-great-nuisance]

Theory on Goro Akechi’s mental health

I might be wrong but just a theory, I am not a psychologist or anything but, Goro might have a ‘Reactive Attachment Disorder’ I am copying the descriptions and all, I’ll link everything below.

First off: 

What is reactive attachment disorder?

Attachment disorder is the inability to form loving and lasting relationships, to give or receive love or affection, form a conscience, or trust others. Attachment difficulties are on a continuum of disturbance that range from attachment issues all the way to reactive attachment disorder. Reactive attachment disorder falls under many names and categories.

In children, these names include:

Reactive attachment disorder or RAD

Attachment disorder

Oppositional defiant disorder

Post-traumatic stress disorder

Childhood trauma

PDD

Pervasive development delay

In adults, these names include:

Borderline personality

Histrionic personality

Antisocial personality

Narcissistic personality

Dependent personality

Obsessive-compulsive disorder

What causes reactive attachment disorder?

The attachments we form as humans early on critically impact our entire lives. If we form healthy and consistent bonds early on, healthy attachments most often continue. When a child misses that window of opportunity, reactive attachment disorder is a likely result.

We are not typically born with reactive attachment disorder. Reactive attachment disorder occurs when a child misses the chance to bond with an adult. Sometimes, that happens before birth due to maternal drug or alcohol use. Other times, babies miss the chance to bond with their mothers due to illness on behalf of mother or baby. More often, reactive attachment disorder begins after birth and within the first three years of life.

Here are some situations that break a person’s ability to attach:

Abuse

Neglect

Abandonment

Multiple changes in caregivers

Foster care

Adoption

Painful illness

Exposure to alcohol/drugs in utero

Maternal depression

Inconsistent daycare

Loss of a parent due to death or divorce

Emotionally distant parents

Why do people with reactive attachment disorder seem to reject love?  

People with attachment issues desire love and acceptance. They just don’t have the cognitive tools to reach that attachment with others. Here at IACD, we’ve learned that past experiences actually change our brain patterns. Simply put, their brains sabotage the very thing people with attachment issues want and need the most—love and acceptance.

How do people with attachment issues reorganize their brain patterns?

As children, we react to our environment—whether safe and secure or scary and sad. We store all those feelings, positive or negative, in the limbic system- or midbrain.

A person who spends the first few years of his or her life in a maladaptive (physically or emotionally painful) environment organizes his/her brain in a maladaptive style of survival behavior. One of the most common maladaptive behaviors is to avoid pain through survival skills.

Our right frontal lobe performs abstract reasoning. To avoid pain, a person with attachment issues reasons with denial rather than normal cause and effect thought. When their limbic systems trigger emotions of fear or sadness, the frontal lobe defends or denies those feelings as a form of protection. Their brain defenses protect them from painful feelings.

Do I have reactive attachment disorder?

Attachment problems vary in severity. Here are some common symptoms of attachment issues in adults.

Symptoms of adult attachment problems:

Difficulty handling conflict with other adults

Denies responsibility for wrong-doing

Controls others through manipulative or overtly hostile ways

Trouble showing empathy, remorse, trust or compassion with others

Lack of the ability to give or receive genuine affection or love. Relates sexual behavior to feelings of acceptance or closeness

Resistant to efforts on behalf of others to nurture or guide them

Lacks cause and effect thinking, especially when around normal thinking

Acts out negatively and provokes anger in others

Lies, steals, cheats and/or manipulates

Destructive, cruel, argumentative and/or hostile

Lacks self-control. Impulsive.

Superficially charming and engaging

Behaves in anger to protect feelings of sadness or fear

Feels isolated and depressed

Feels frustrated and stressed

Addictive behavior i.e. substance abuse, sex addiction, work addiction, gambling addiction, etc.

Behaves hyper-vigilantly and agitated and has trouble concentrating

Confused, puzzled and obsessed with finding answers

Feels blamed by family, friends, and professionals

Feels helpless, hopeless, and angry

Feels that helping professionals minimize his or her family problems

Let’s look at Akechi’s description:

Akechi is a high school student who conducts a detective business. His abilities as a detective have been widely acclaimed, since he not only has solved numerous cases, but is also able to deal with people from the investigation agency smoothly. His handsome features draw him public attention, and people comment on him as “The Second Advent of the Detective Prince.”

Behind this popularity, he is actually quite lonely and yearns to be loved. He was abandoned by his father, subsequently lost his mother to suicide, and never had any real friends. Akechi even calls himself an unwanted, cursed child. This combined with being passed around in the foster care system as an orphan has resulted in a far more jaded worldview than Akechi initially lets on. He has a desperate desire for fame, affection, and attention, which he is forthright about being the primary drive for his actions as a detective. However, the public only supports him as long as he upholds the pretense of being a charismatic idol detective, and his fans are quick to turn on him if he makes mistakes, such as when the Phantom Thieves quickly garner support from the public after their successful heist of stealing Kaneshiro's heart, and their triumph over Medjed. Akechi states he is extremely careful about his life, public image and grades, so that someone will want him around.

His wish to be acknowledged pushes him to do anything his father tells him in order to earn his acceptance. He is also unable say no to Shido due to the latter threatening him when Akechi even mildly dares question his orders. However, Akechi secretly resents his father for abandoning his mother while she was still pregnant with Akechi, as he believes having a bastard child was what caused his mother to eventually commit suicide. He's sworn revenge on his father, even going as far as being a hitman for Shido and acting as his right-hand-man, all in pursuit of his goal to ruin him when Shido is at the apex of his power.

I’m not saying that all of it applies to him but, you can see that it’s somewhat do. He was neglect by adults and pretty much abandoned by his parents if you look at some point. He probably saw his mom hanging on a noose, gets passed by foster care on that. Hell, he is a fictional character but his life is too realistic tbh. On the side note,

Japan treats illegitimate children as a curse, nothing but a scandal. His mother can abort him but she never did.

Oh well, that’s all.

[Source: http://instituteforattachment.ong/learn-about-attachment-disorder/common-questions/

http://megamitensei.wikia.com/wiki/Goro_Akechi]

#goro akechi #persona 5 #theory #cut him some slacks jesus #yes he'd done bad things but he'll die if he didn't obey #pls protect him #akechi goro

[jericho373-blog]

Zodiac Signs and Sorrow

I relate to this so much tbh..

Aries

The Ram is seldom sorrowful. Their natural optimism keeps them cheerful and excitable. Aries is not immune to sorrow, though. Their reaction to such is usually through distractions by being active (think of Tony Stark in Iron Man 3). They’ll keep themselves busy, because doing things is better than feelings things. When their sorrows do bubble to the surface, it is likely they’ll seem angry, because that, too, is easier for them to handle. On the other hand, Aries may cope by discussing their best traits, or the things happening in their life. This, too, is a sort of distraction for them - talking about the good can help them forget about the bad.

Taurus

Only those who are closest to the Bull will ever see even a glimpse of their sorrow. Taurus individuals prefer to isolate themselves when they are affected by their sorrow. They won’t usually cry unless they are alone. They also have a tendency to temporarily stop talking to everyone as they try to work through whatever has them upset. When around people, Taurus will bury everything, and choose instead to be cheerful, and silly. They’ll focus all of their energy in taking care of every else.

Gemini

When plagued with sorrow, the twins usually try to ignore it. They aren’t fond of unnecessary emotions. However, when something can’t simply be ignored, it tends to fester under their surface, causing them to erupt with anger and criticism that may seem source-less. When they aren’t lashing out, Gemini can feel an uncomfortable sense of restlessness. They may feel as if they absolutely need to be doing something other than what they are presently doing. This restlessness may manifest as a sort of irritability. When Gemini properly identifies the cause of their anger, they will try to apply logic to it. This can often be seen when they place labels of mental illness upon themselves, or simply by blaming it on the events leading up to it, or the people they believe to have caused it.

Cancer

When it comes to Sorrow, the Crab has a tendency to hold on tightly. They don’t lack the ability to move past whatever is causing them pain, but often don’t try to. Cancer can be rather reserved, so you may not know the source of their sorrow. However, they do have a tendency to wear their heart on their sleeve. Often, it may be obvious that Cancer is upset, even if the reason is kept to themselves. These people tend to have difficulty seeing past their intense emotions, so may seem recluse during the times that they are burdened with sorrow. However, Cancers also can be very open to people they consider close, and will often talk to their loved one about what’s going on.

Leo

Similar to Aries, the Lion isn’t usually burdened by sorrow. When Leo is upset, however, they will not usually make a big display of it. As flamboyant as Leo’s are, they need to protect their public image. Tears aren’t something they want associated with their name. In fact, Leo’s are so skilled at hiding their misery, that they can often hide it from themselves. When behind closed doors, though, they are prone to outburst  Whether it’s via temper tantrums or fits of sobbing can vary greatly from person to person. Typically, these Fire Signs busy themselves by focusing on the affairs of others.

Virgo

The ever vigilant perfectionist, the Virgin often see sorrow as a weakness they’d rather do without. That’s not to say they’re impervious to such feelings - they simply have a tendency towards burying it. Virgo’s will often choose productivity instead. Whether that be reorganizing, cleaning, completing, or being productive. Virgo’s aren’t the first to open up about their sorrow, but if you’re close to one, they just might. They aren’t the type to mope and cry about it, but even stating that it exists is a big step for them.

Libra

The Scales know balance like the back of their hand, and with that ability they aren’t often weighed down by sorrow. Like the other Air Signs, Libra’s aren’t renown for having feelings run too deeply. They’ll likely think their way through problems, and detach from anything, or anyone, that weighs them down. When their balance is trifled with, Libra’s can find solace in social interaction. Since they are ruled by Venus, the planet of beauty, they may find a shopping experiences or surrounding themselves in beauty will help sort things out. Since they aren’t fond of misery, Libra’s will do anything to normalize their balance. Libra’s don’t often express their sorrow, even to those very close to them. Instead, they may withdraw slightly, returning when they are feeling better.

Scorpio

Prone to profoundly deep emotions, whatever the Scorpion feels vibrates through their entire core. Sorrow is no exception. When a Scorpio is plagued by Sorrow, they will usually keep it to themselves. Since they are so secretive, only the people they deem worthy are allowed to see them at anything but their best. Scorpio, ruled by Mars, will seek action to solve their emotional turmoil. This can be through busying themselves, though occasionally they turn to substances. They are, however, also ruled by Pluto, the planet of transformation. As such, they have the ability to muster enough will power to move past their sorrow continue with their life.

Sagittarius

Optimism runs deep through the Archer, and as a mutable sign, they have a knack for bouncing back. When Sagittarius people are burdened by sorrow, they almost never show it. They choose instead to continue behaving upbeat, friendly, and chipper as ever. If it does ever become too much to handle, the only thing you’ll notice is that they won’t be as talkative as normal. They’ll withdraw into their thoughts, only speaking when spoken to, though their tone will remain light and happy. Those closest to a Sagittarius may be allowed a small insight into their misery, but it isn’t the most common occurrence.

Capricorn

Ever proud, the Sea Goat doesn’t often show signs of sorrow. Equipped with an unceasing gift of logic, many people assume they don’t feel such emotions (or any emotions). Since Capricorn’s are naturally aloof, they often withdraw due to negative emotions. They are not immune to sorrow, though, and are quite often touched by it. Similar to other Earth Signs, Capricorns will usually bury their emotions rather than deal with them up-front. They also don’t show people when they’re down, as they have a public image to preserve. Capricorn’s often try to use logic to expel their negative emotions. Things don’t always blow over as quickly as they like, but it doesn’t usually take very long at all. Capricorns, as mentioned, try to maintain their public image. So only those whom they are closest to will know that anything is wrong at all.

Aquarius

As the Fixed Air Sign, the water bearer doesn’t often feel sorrow too deeply. Usually this intellectual individual thinks through their problems until they find the solutions necessary. If there are people they are close with, and feel that they can open up to emotionally, they may talk out their problems as another way of finding a solution.When upset, Aquarius often uses their aloof nature to mask any sorrow. They’ll continue their philosophical debates and friendly conversations as if there’s nothing at all wrong with the world (save homelessness, and the other humanitarian causes they are involved in).

Pisces

The fishes feel every emotion intensely. When Sorrow has struck them, it tends to hit them hard.Pisces are stuck between to impulses, when burdened by misery. On one hand, they find it difficult to not wear their heart on their sleeves, and express their emotions. On the other, they don’t want to bother their loved ones, so may often try to bottle things up as an act of self-sacrifice.The Pisces individuals will often seek an escape, whether that’s through fantasy (books, movies, tv, etc) or temporary mood alteration (drugs, alcohol, etc).