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#sysneg
fictionkinfessions · 28 days
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Who's bright idea was it to shove a bunch of demons into a brain plagued by mood disorders. And then to put someone we all hate in here.
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jesters-court-sys · 3 years
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rlly wish i could just hyperfixate on a media without splitting a fictive from it
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secretkeepersystem · 3 years
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nagito is fronting right now and he was there for like five minutes before our sister snapped and said talking about "that anime stuff"
he's talking about hope okay he likes to talk about hope that is what he does and i know he isn't the easiest to deal with but he's trying his best, he has literally never talked to a human being who is not in the system since he formed and he's been through so much
just. ugh she's really annoying me right now by being so shitty to komie
- makoto
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I'm a fictive in DID system, and I don't feel accepted in traumagenic community. I just don't. I'm tired of endless syscourse, of people examining every post for fakeness, of people spitting bile at endogenics and fictionkin. I'm deeply sorry I used to be like them. I can't bring myself to hate anyone over their coping mechanisms anymore.
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fictionkinfessions · 3 months
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all of my friends hate my source, same with my system*. one of the creators is a kinda shitty person and the internet as a whole kinda hates him, too. i want to look at fanart and read fanfic and use my real name and face but i don't want people to hate us and i don't want us to lose our friends. i feel so isolated. i don't know what to do.
*my system as in the system i'm a part of, i don't own them haha
📦
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fictionkinfessions · 4 months
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I’m not sure if this is a shared experience amongst systems or if it’s the eternal sense I guilt I carry, but being the alter that’s around the most makes me feel so bad. I know that’s the point of being a “host”, or part of it at the very least, but that doesn’t make me feel much better. I’m sorry it’s me.
📦
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fictionkinfessions · 4 months
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why couldn't my brain focus on splitting someone NORMAL who KNOWS HOW TO DO SELF-CARE. girl what the hell is buck ruffler the duck shuffler
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fictionkinfessions · 4 months
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Lately I’ve felt like a friend of my host’s doesn’t exactly like me… She’s nice to me, of course, and is very patient waiting for my host to come back to front, but I get the feeling that she rather just have my host instead of me. That every time I’m in front and conversing with her, I’m just getting in the way of her time with the host. Even in text, it feels like her entire tone changes once she learns I’m the one in front. It makes me sad, because I really would like to be friends with her as well, but I can’t do much if she won’t even try to understand me.
( It’s also a bit amusing in a sad way that she doesn’t seem to like me, because it’s so clearly evident that she likes my source counterpart and is attracted to him… Am I not as good as that Kaeya? Am I not as good as my host? )
Sigh… Being a fictive/system is a struggle sometimes…
~ Kaeya
( #🏴‍☠️❄️🍷 ) ( fictive )
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fictionkinfessions · 20 days
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I.. miss my son. I miss him a lot. I don’t remember how horrible I was, even if I was.
Kid, my child. I hope you’re safe out there somewhere, which I highly believe you are!! I still love you. I miss you and the others very much!!! Please make smart choices now. :)
Also this is my first time fronting in a while, and I am a gatekeeper. I decided to front because I was having an issue with another gatekeeper from another system, who was NOT doing their job correctly and it upsetted me. So if there’s other gatekeepers reading this, please please keep your host safe. Let them know you care for them, let them know you love them no matter what.
Again, it deeply upsets me when there’s another gatekeeper who is going against their role as a gatekeeper. Those who do that do NOT deserve such role. Especially if they treat fictives and their host horribly. We’re supposed to be there to HELP. Not make anything worse than it already is. As cheesy at it may sound, we’re a family. We’re gonna be stuck with each other FOR YEARS. Like it or not, I do not care, you have to get over yourself and help too. Thats our role.
-Death (Soul Eater fictive) #👻♠️💀⚠️
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fictionkinfessions · 26 days
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I feel so sick i got horrible exomemories that caused me to spiral immensely and hurt all my close ones i made such a huge mess that it caused our partner system’s protector to come out and i feel utterly sick for what ive done. I feel a bit better now from the spirals but it feels like i dont deserve to show my face ever again but at the same time i keep constantly getting frontstuck so now i just feel trapped in my own guilt for the rest of my life i dont know how to get through this
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fictionkinfessions · 2 months
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just realized there’s a nonzero chance a system friend of mine ends up interjecting my noncanon sister. this idea terrifies me. it feels unfair to think but…I don’t know what to do about the feeling. ugh
🍂
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fictionkinfessions · 2 months
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I don't know what to do I think we have an alter from a media that's a bit problematic and has triggered us but I don't think the alter tjemself is a bad person and we don't want to stifle them but we're just so unsure what to do about it and it's kinda scary
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fictionkinfessions · 2 months
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wouldnt it be funny and amusing if a fictive of other dude/p3 dude split bc i kin p2 dude...wouldnt that just give u the giggles. its like my fucked up little brain is trying to recreate paradise lost except i dont have a head wound this time, im just Like This. oh and hes fucking mean, too.
-postal dude.
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fictionkinfessions · 2 months
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my job is to be heard. no matter the cost, no matter their feelings. whatever i have to say, however loud it has to be to get them to finally listen not ignore dont fucking ignore me, not anymore, nobody gets to force me to shut up so they can be comfortable. a growling barking bad dog doesnt know anything else. when you leave i chase you for both reasons in equal desperation, i am stopped only and always by the fence. when a bridge is crossed i light it on instinct like its a cigarette and im still addicted and its painting my organs dark and its killing me inside out. i cant hide vulnerability like canon. i cant commit to not caring despite anything i say. im just an even bigger coward here, an even smaller paper tiger.
m (fictive)
🌫
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fictionkinfessions · 3 months
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I hate being a Caroline splinter that has to share a head with a Cave splinter. I wish he could leave me alone already-Caroline
And I wish my assistant would let bygones be bygones and not be so upset about everything! She's also the reason my wife left me. Which sucks.-Cave
(We're both from Portal)
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fictionkinfessions · 3 months
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he misses his family. he misses his partners. she misses her partners. he misses his kids. i just miss feeling like i’m home. (#sysneg)
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