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sorikkung · 2 years

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what goes on in neverland. ⇝ ch. 3: conversations, conversations, camboys?

word count: 9.8k

pairings: transmasc!reader x Everyone, everyone x everyone (its literally too convoluted for me to try type them out here anymore just see the masterlist for full pairings LOL)

genre: fluff, smut and lots of assorted shenanigans. hijinks, if you will

au: battle of the bands!au but make it gay and horny

warnings: adults talking abt their feelings, mutual masturbation, camming, bondage, remote controlled toys, edging, ruined orgasms, boys crying, cum swallowing but its realistic

a/n: the jump between me taking half a year to update to months to two within the same months??? progress is real guys. anyway we're finally delving into another pov this chapter how exciting!! a lot goin on, a lot of set up here i hope you guys are as excited as i am for what it leads to 🤭

please reblog and leave feedback if you enjoyed, it’s what keeps us writers going :’) (for every comment i get i open up a wip and write a few sentences. thats not bribery but literally just how motivating it is.)

tags: @honeybyunnies @syunderful @absentcaryatid @mingirn (lmk if you want to be added/removed!)

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>you: i got some mad fucking tea to spill are you ready

>mingi’s bitch: omg bet come over

>you: aight @energeric where r u

>you: ???

Figuring you’d just meet him at the couple’s apartment, you slip some shoes on and grab your keys from the hooks in your doorway to leave, only to find the very man you were pinging grabbing his to do the same.

“Oh, did you see the texts then?” you ask, figuring he’d be going too, but then it strikes you that he probably would’ve started pestering you for details already before you even made it to their apartment.

“No, I’m– I’m heading out. Gonna hit the gym with a buddy.” He pauses mid-way through slipping on his shoes and tying the laces to look up at you. “What happened? Dude, your cheek is bruising, are you becoming the same kinda painslut as Wooyoung is or did you get into a fight?”

“Got clocked in the face by Changbin at the food court with Wooyo today, but it’s what his boyfriend texted me afterward that I’m gonna go discuss with him– you should come, the tea is piping hot.”

He shakes his head, hastily finishing tying off his laces and getting up. “Nah, I don’t wanna leave my friend waiting, he’s already there. If you can’t brief it in a maximum of maybe four and a half sentences, it’s gotta wait.”

You snort. “What the fuck is half a sentence meant to look like?”

“And you just used one. Three and a half, go.”

“Changbin’s boyfriend is hot and Felix is still definitely in love with you.”

For a moment, Eric doesn’t say anything at all. He just stares at you, unblinking, and you expect his eyes to widen or his brows to raise or show any inkling of surprise after a few seconds, but he doesn’t. For once you can’t read the dark clouds in his eyes, though you know he’s definitely having some sort of emotional reaction to the news, but he simply turns to grab his keys as if you didn’t say a thing.

“Cool.”

“Cool?” It stumps you, how normal he’s acting when you’re positive he’s feeling anything but. He’s a man who wears his heart on his sleeve and doesn’t hide how he feels, so the way he’s been acting in regards to Felix raises a few questions. Granted, you didn’t expect him to go running back to him – or maybe you did, just partially – but you certainly expected more than that. “That’s it? I thought you still liked him.”

He sighs deeply through his mouth and twirls his keys around his finger idly while standing in the doorway. “Why would I? Yes, I still like him. Maybe a part of me always will. But he’s the one who broke up with me because he didn’t have time for me. Now I see where that time went, and frankly, I don’t think I have time for him either. I too would rather focus on the people I care about. I don’t care if he still loves me. If he really, truly did, as much as I loved him? He’d do a better job at showing it.”

“That’s… fair,” you sound out slowly, nodding. It makes perfect sense, and in hindsight if he’d jumped at the opportunity first you might have even warned him for being too hasty for that very reason. “Don’t worry, he’ll see what he’s missing. We’ll wipe the floor with him and all of his friends.”

Eric gives you a nod and a half smile that doesn’t reach his eyes, then bids you goodbye and heads off. How abrupt, you think. You’ll probably come back to that one later.

There are many benefits to dating Jung Wooyoung, Mingi finds. One of them is that it can never really get boring. Everything about Wooyoung is exciting, and he tries to share that with Mingi as much as possible, whether that be spicing up what they try out in the bedroom or taking him on all sorts of wild adventures for dates, or just always having something going on exciting enough to talk about even on their lazy days.

Today is no exception; he sits on their couch in just his sweatpants, while Wooyoung lies draped across his lap in only his t-shirt. Not his own, but Mingi’s, naturally, and he’s already accepted he won’t get it back until it stops smelling like him. When today’s excitement – you, of course – strolls in and gives them a knowing look, he shakes his head before even greeting you.

“We weren’t fucking this time. Though if you took any longer we might’ve!”

It certainly wouldn’t be the first time you’ve walked in on them in more provocative positions, if that were the case – most times these days, they don’t bother to stop at the interruption, and more often than not you’re quick to join in on the fun anyway. It’s not unheard of, however, for you – or any of the other band members, for that matter – to pass on joining in and merely scroll on their phone or read a book or snack while in the very same room as the deed is being done, but nobody really minds. It’s just a thing that happens, at this point, just as normal as eating or playing video games. You all prefer it that way.

Hell, Mingi is a huge fan of the concept. It didn’t take Wooyoung very long to figure out how much he enjoys showing off, so as soon as his days of being a little shyer and more self-conscious fell behind him in favour of his newfound confidence in his sex appeal and comfort with the band, he became quite the tease when he has an audience. Perhaps that’s why he was all too keen to let Wooyoung drag him down the corridor Changbin went down at the battle of the bands and start making out with him on the spot, knowing – no, even better, hoping – the other man would be watching.

“Without me? How cruel.” You’re quick to join them on the couch, cuddling into Mingi’s side and allowing Wooyoung to sprawl across your lap as well. They both silently appreciate how you fit so easily into their lives as to not even need so much as a greeting when you arrive at their apartment. It’s your home as much as theirs, probably helped by how the whole band lives in the same apartment complex, albeit different floors. At this point, you might as well all be roommates. “Though I suppose I’ll be the crueller one, considering I’m gonna be having a threesome with Changbin and his hot boyfriend and you’re not invited.”

“What?!” Wooyoung jolts up off your laps, staring at you like you just grew a second head. “Why the fuck not? After I sucked the soul out of him that one time? Damn, he has no idea what he’s missing, I’ve only gotten better since.”

“Actually, he kinda does,” you chuckle, taking his place across his and Mingi’s laps so you can cheerily grin up at him and poke your tongue out. “Little birdy told me it was, to this day, the best head he’s ever had. Not that he’d ever admit it.”

“Wait a second, who was the little birdy? Changbin or Minho?” Mingi asks, idly tapping his fingers on your back while the gears turn in his head. Truly, excitement follows Wooyoung wherever he goes — he doesn’t even need to try.

“Minho. We’re Instagram mutuals now, apparently. He had soooo much juicy tea for me. Like how the reason Changbin is gonna deny all your advances is because he’s been in love with you since high school but doesn’t wanna admit it, even to himself.”

Wooyoung freezes, and Mingi freezes at Wooyoung freezing. Mingi doesn’t know the full details of Wooyoung and Changbin’s history beyond being best friends in high school with another friend who went back to Korea — Yeonjun, Mingi thinks his name was — and that the three of them helped each other experiment and realise that they all liked boys. It sounded very casual, and Mingi figured that makes sense; Wooyoung was one of the key players in opening the band up with each other more physically, and, by extension, his relationship with Mingi. Wooyoung is just the kinda guy who likes being physically and sexually affectionate with his friends, and that didn’t bother him. Not when he enjoyed it almost just as much. In many ways, Wooyoung was the reason Mingi could come so far outside his shell. He’d forever be grateful to him for that.

It takes Wooyoung a good, long moment to remember to breathe again before he bursts out laughing, loud and wide and unfiltered in all the ways Mingi just can’t help but fall for. He isn’t sure what is so inherently hilarious about Changbin’s feelings for him, but he doesn’t realise he’s grinning goofily until you give him a very particular smirk that he’s awfully familiar with. The ‘You’re so damn whipped it’s written all over your face’ smirk. But who in their right mind can blame him? At least, that’s what he thinks to himself while his lover takes a moment to recover.

“No way,” he says at last, “Changbin? In love with me after all these years? Oh, that’s rich. You don’t think- you don’t think that’s the real reason they joined the battle of the bands, is it? To see me again?”

“You and your massive ego,” Mingi huffs, nudging him in the shoulder. “I mean, possibly? I feel like it’s more likely that they’re tryna suck JYP’s dick. But that and Felix possibly holding some resentment for Eric and doing it out of spite might be part of it too.”

“Nah, Felix doesn’t resent Eric,” you inform him, “He’s still in love with him. Did Wooyoung not fill you in? That’s why Changbin was all like, ‘just because Felix still likes Eric doesn’t mean you can use him like that!’ It’s kinda the whole reason I got clocked in the face, which was lucky for your boyfriend’s pretty face because if I wasn’t there, it would’ve been him.”

“He didn’t really fill me in, no,” Mingi pouts, shouldering him again, but Wooyoung only scoffs and shoulders him back. “He was too busy telling me all about how hot Changbin was in a fitted t-shirt and how you went flying across a table to really elaborate on the why. Also how hot that Minho guy is and how he seemed down for the double date, so I’m wondering why all of a sudden we’re not invited to the gangbang!”

“Pfft. It’s- Just read the texts.” You unlock your phone and shove it in his hands to save yourself more explaining. Wooyoung snatches it from you before Mingi can grab it, so he simply leans over his shoulder to read without further complaint.

>lino.ooo: i wish he’d understand that being attracted to other people doesn’t mean i love him any less

>lino.ooo: but him accepting that would mean accepting he has feelings for people who aren’t me either 🤭

Mingi reads this and his first instinct is to look at Wooyoung’s face. Wooyoung, eyes adorably wide and almost trying to shove his face into the screen with how invested into these texts he is. The puzzle starts to piece itself together in Mingi’s brain, sneaking suspicions he hasn’t accepted enough to address yet, but he can’t help but feel for Minho’s situation.

>lino.ooo: but i’ve been dating him for a couple years now, and i’ve been his friend even longer, i know the signs. i know what he looks like when hes in love with someone, because he’s like that with me, too

That makes him look at Wooyoung once again, analysing every detail on his stupidly perfect face, and that’s when it really clicks. Mingi feels for Minho because it’s too easy for him to imagine himself in similar shoes – possibly because he’s already standing in them. And possibly has been for a long time now.

He thinks back to how their open relationship all started; how you and Sunwoo had been best friends with benefits since your last year of high school before you dropped out and ran away without him, anyway, and Eric since not long after, jokingly justifying your relationship with there being ‘nothing wrong with kissing the homies goodnight.’ It was an inside joke at first, one followed by obnoxious PDA between your trio or Mingi and Wooyoung calling themselves ‘totally platonic homies’ despite having been dating for a while, but somewhere down the line you had all started actually giving each other goodnight kisses.

He thinks about San, who used to blush such a pretty pink at the gesture, and how he couldn’t help himself turning a chaste peck on the lips to a kiss that lingered, hands that wandered – next thing he knows, Wooyoung is running to him saying he fucked up, genuine fear in his eyes, quick to confess how his goodnight kiss with San escalated to making out against a wall and how it all happened so fast and he stopped it as soon as she realised he was enjoying it too much for a goodnight kiss and ran to Mingi first thing to come clean. He had apologised so vehemently that day, like he was really, truly scared he would lose his lover for such a careless mistake; Mingi then wonders how much of that fear lies beyond the simple kiss.

How much of it was the feelings San made him feel that scared him so.

He decides to keep these thoughts to himself for the time being. After all, maybe he’s simply overthinking again, comparing himself to the other rapper now that he’s come and changed up the scene. Wooyoung has a type, it seems. Thick lips, broad shoulders, reckless confidence, and spits fire on the mic. He wonders how long it’ll be before he inevitably falls for Sunwoo, too. He fits the type to a T. Maybe he already has, actually, he isn’t too sure – but he’s far surer that the way he looks at you, San and Changbin, isn’t the way people usually look at their platonic friends. Or their former friends who they haven’t seen in years and desperately want to get in the pants of and show off to.

Mingi remains quiet.

“Well, I think our next plan of attack is rather obvious,” Wooyoung hums, barely concealing his excitement. However, neither you nor Mingi seem to follow, so you wait for him to realise and elaborate. “Like… if he doesn’t even realise he’s in love with me, we gotta make sure he does.”

“What is that even supposed to mean?” Mingi ponders aloud, raising an inquisitive eye at Wooyoung. He stares back at him.

“Exactly what it sounds like? We need to make Changbin realise he’s in love with me whether he likes it or not. Like, he’s in love with me, that’s so exciting? This whole time? I was literally his gay awakening, I gotta remind him how he got to this point in the first place.” Wooyoung states it like it’s the most obvious thing in the world, but Mingi simply blinks, then cuts you off before you can say anything.

“Why?”

That renders both of you silent, and it’s only then when Wooyoung and you seem to finally notice the seriousness of Mingi’s expression, the atmosphere sobering up so quickly it gives him whiplash.

“B-Because… come on, it’ll be fun! What’re you looking so serious for, I'm not the one in love with him! I think I just get a sick sense of satisfaction from it. Plus, he’s hot, you’ve already agreed with me that much, do you not want to make him squirm a little?”

Mingi only frowns harder. It’s true, they already discussed bringing Changbin and even Minho into the bedroom if the opportunity presented itself, but this wasn’t quite the opportunity he was thinking about. If Wooyoung sleeps with someone who he knows likes him like that, wouldn’t that be more than just a casual fling? Why would he want to engage when he knows feelings are involved already? Mingi thinks he knows the answer.

It begs the question, considering when it was brought up they never defined what ‘messing with’ other people implied. Mingi figured they were on the same page in it meaning just having sex or touching or kissing, but now he wonders if he missed something. “How far does our ethical non-monogamy go?”

“What are you–“

“Wooyoung, you’re really excited to hear that your old best friend likes you like that… what’s so exciting about it? You have me already.”

“What? I’m not excited, I just–” Wooyoung flounders at the accusation, bumping you out of the way so he can crawl half on top of Mingi, so he sees just how serious he is. Like the physical closeness would bridge the gap slowly forming. “Jagiya, that’s not what this is at all. I haven’t felt like that about Changbin since I was like, seventeen–“

“So you admit you did once have feelings for him, then?”

“Woah, woah! What is with that accusatory tone? Mingi, I’m not going anywhere. I’m yours, only yours.” He grabs both of his boyfriend’s hands in his, clasping them tightly while he looks in his eyes, wavering. It’s almost uncomfortable to watch. “There’s no competition. Whatever feelings I had for him back then are long gone now, it’s really just a sex thing, like we have with the band, that’s all it is! You know you’re the only one for me, you know I wasn’t even interested in settling down before you, that’s how much you mean to me. I’m yours, first and foremost, no one else’s. However else I get my dick wet doesn’t matter, it– it doesn’t change that. What we have is so much more than that.”

It’s definitely uncomfortable for you to watch now, evident in the way you try to awkwardly shuffle away from them. If Wooyoung notices anything off he doesn’t mention it, gazing almost unblinkingly into Mingi’s eyes in hopes it’ll make him feel his sincerity, but the only sincerity Mingi feels in that moment is Wooyoung’s sincerity to himself. Like he’s trying to convince himself of this just as much as him.

He can’t just tell him that, though. Who is he to tell his boyfriend which of his feelings are real or not? Who is he to say he’s deluding himself? That would be borderline gaslighting if he did, but he can’t ignore the signs that are becoming increasingly obvious the longer he stews on them. He speaks in Korean next in hopes that you won’t catch the meaning of his words.

“Your ears go red when you lie, Wooyoung.”

His mouth opens to say something, then shuts, then again, soundlessly appearing almost like a gaping fish. You don’t stay to hear more, quickly and wordlessly grabbing your phone back from where it had fallen to the couch in Wooyoung’s surprise and trying to make as little noise as possible on your way out to not disturb them. Mingi doesn’t blame you; all of a sudden the air in the room feels awfully stuffy and borderline suffocating, but he has to face this head-on, or else Wooyoung will be lightly dancing around the topic until it escalates.

“I’m not lying,” Wooyoung mumbles, his voice small and caught in his throat. “Is that really what you think I’m like?”

“I– Look, Wooyoung, I’m not going to tell you how you do or don’t feel, I just… Minho’s texts felt kind of relatable when he was talking about how he noticed how his boyfriend looks at other men because he knows what his in love look, looks like. I saw the way you look at Changbin and it just… reminded me of that. But I also see the way you look at them, too,” he gestures towards the door where you just made your escape, “and San. Honestly, I can argue for all of the band, but those two in particular, you look at them the exact same way you look at me. And I just… don’t know what I’m supposed to do about that. How I’m supposed to feel about that.”

Wooyoung shakes his head slowly, almost in disbelief. “There’s nothing to feel about. I meant what I said–“

It’s the denial that gets him. Maybe it wouldn’t sting so much if he just came clean and confessed it, admitted to feeling things for other people, and maybe they could talk about it and what it meant for their relationship, but if he can’t realise it himself they won’t get anywhere. And the more he tries to deny it, the more he digs himself into a hole that only highlights Mingi’s very suspicions.

“No you didn’t. Is that really all the band is to you? Just another way to get your dick wet?”

He pauses, settling back down on his legs as the weight of his words finally sink in. “No, I… of course they’re more than that, they’re... I probably shouldn’t’ve said that in front of him, I’ll– I’ll have to apologise to him later.”

Mingi nods. “Yeah, you should. Like, aren’t we constantly going on about how platonic love is just as meaningful as romantic love? Isn’t that why we’re as close with the band as we are? Saying that what we have is so much more than that just because its romantic is so diminishing. That’s how I know you don’t mean it – you don’t believe that, do you? That’s against everything we both believe in.”

“Well, yes, but–“ he gnaws on the inside of his cheek, trying to formulate a response. “I guess I panicked? I just don’t want you thinking after all we’ve been through together that I’m gonna be into Changbin now all of a sudden just because he likes me. As far as romantic love goes, I just want you. I don’t want anything to change that, to change what we have.”

“We don’t have to change anything,” Mingi reminds him calmly, hands smoothing over the smaller man’s thighs in a soothing motion. “I just want you to be honest with me, and honest with yourself. I won’t be mad at you if you like other people because I know you love me, I just… want you to be able to tell me. To trust me.”

Wooyoung nods silently, slowly at first, then frantically. “I-I will. I’m sorry, Mingi.”

“What are you apologising for?”

“I–“ He falls flat. “I don’t know.”

“Then don’t apologise,” Mingi reassures him with the faintest of smiles, cupping his face and pulling him in for a gentle kiss. “Well, maybe do apologise, just not to me. I apologise for putting you on the spot like that.”

Wooyoung chases his lips after the first kiss, hands slipping around the back of his neck and pulling him in, kissing him deeply and sending tingles down Mingi’s spine. They’re both just so handsy, grabbing at whatever they can reach, Wooyoung drawing closer into Mingi’s lap to close the distance between them, so they can hold each other while they kiss like this. Mingi is honestly content to simply kiss him like that for hours on end, but Wooyoung seems to have other plans as their kisses grow hotter and their hands wander further, teeth digging into lips and nails digging into skin.

When he breaks apart, it’s to slip down Mingi’s lap and onto the floor on his knees, spreading Mingi’s legs apart and reaching for the band of his sweatpants. On his knees for him in nothing but his shirt, Mingi knows he’ll never not be affected by such a sight – if it isn’t old by now it probably never will be, and Mingi finds comfort in that. He likes knowing his boyfriend has him wrapped around his pinkie finger, and that he’ll never fail to drive him wild. It’s safe, secure, how his heart beats for him.

“Let me show you exactly how much you mean to me,” Wooyoung murmurs, low and sultry, but it has the opposite of the intended effect. Mingi tenses up, grabbing both of Wooyoung’s wrists on instinct, then pushes them away from him. The flash of distress on Wooyoung’s face doesn’t slide past him, but he doesn’t have it in him to feel too guilty about it.

“Wooyoung,” he breathes out, not letting go of his wrists. “How is this any different? How is having sex with me proving how much I mean to you when you just said all your relationships with other men are just about sex? What kind of message are you giving me with this?”

How Mingi’s heart beats for Wooyoung is safe. He knows that no matter what happens, that will never change – it will always beat for him. That much he is sure of.

Whether Wooyoung is the same, however, he is not.

His mistake seems to crash down on him all at once, and he slips his hands free and back to his sides as he scrambles to his feet in panic. “No, no, I didn’t mean–“

“Just… stop,” Mingi sighs, running a hand through his hair. He’s tired. He doesn’t want to wrestle with – whatever this is that they’re wrestling with – any longer. “I don’t wanna go in circles again, can we just… cuddle?”

Wooyoung is eager to oblige, grabbing a throw blanket off the couch and curling up to Mingi’s side with a quickness he only ever really sees from him on-stage, but he's visibly relieved at the change of topic though guilt still lingers on his features. Mingi turns on the tv; white noise at this point, to leave him alone with his thoughts. Well, not too alone, with Wooyoung in his arms, but he likes it that way. Maybe a small part of him fears that if he lets go, he’ll lose him – but mostly, he just enjoys having him close, even when they’re not the happiest with each other. They’ll get through this.

He leans his head atop the crown of his lover’s, not before pressing a quick kiss to the top. Wooyoung buries his face in his shoulder, returning the kiss to his bare skin, and in that moment, that is all Mingi needs.

That’s enough excitement for one day.

It’s only when you finally get back to your apartment and shut the door behind you do you finally feel like you can breathe again, far away from the stuffiness of the couple’s apartment and the thick tension between them as they fought right in front of you. Not the first time they had done so, and you are usually comfortable enough in their home to just scroll on your phone on their couch until they’re done, but you’re not sure you’ve witnessed a fight quite so personal between them before. Besides, it’s not like you had anything planned for staying longer, so it felt easier to get out of there as soon as you can rather than wait it out as a spectator and hope they’d feel up to sex or video games or going for a cheeky fast-food run in the aftermath.

Sunwoo is sprawled across the couch when you arrive, and he raises his eyebrow at you over his shoulder when he notices the loud exhale at finally arriving home.

“What, did your gossip sesh with Woogi not go so well?” he jokes, but when you plop yourself across his lap, staring up at the ceiling with a humourless chuckle back, he figures he’s probably exactly right.

“Yeah, you could say that.”

“Wanna talk about it?” He turns off his phone and slips it back into his hoodie pocket to give you his full attention, so you sigh.

“So the goss is that Felix is in love with Eric still, which I already told him and he doesn’t wanna do anything about it, which is fine, and then the other part was that Changbin has been pining over Wooyoung since high school. Which is like, a long ass time to be pining over someone you’ve barely seen since, but it’s enough that his boyfriend noticed – oh yeah, I’m leaving out details again. So Changbin ran into me and Wooyoung at the food court and punched me in the face–“

“–he what?! –“

“–yeah full-on sent me falling over a table, it was hot– yeah and then in a last ditch attempt for him to not like, literally knock my lights out in the middle of the plaza, I complimented his muscles and fed his ego enough for him to be too busy preening to deck me, and then his boyfriend came in. Lee Minho, or Lino apparently is his stage name, and he grabbed my ass, put a metaphorical leash on his boyfriend and basically said we had a point and then plugged Stray Kids’ Instagram, to which obviously I had to stalk, and then I followed his account because he has three really cute cats and we started dm-ing and– here I’ll just show you the messages.”

Sunwoo is straight-up laughing by the time you finish your tale, grabbing your phone from you as you pull up the direct messages with the eccentric man. “You know, just because you’re a rapper doesn’t mean you have to exercise that breath control when telling a story, take it from me.”

“This is how I normally talk!” That draws an exasperated giggle from you, and that’s enough to ease some of the tension that was weighing on your shoulders from the argument. “Basically, you’ll see what I’m talking about when you scroll down to it, but basically I told all this to Wooyoung and he was like, ‘If Changbin has feelings for me and doesn’t even notice I gotta make him notice,’ which for obvious reasons made Mingi a little uncomfortable, because why would he care about his crush on him if he’s already happily taken anyway? So he asked how far their ethical non-monogamy is meant to go and Wooyoung got all defensive and basically said that Mingi is his everything and everyone else is just how he gets his dick wet but doesn’t compare to him, and honestly… that one kinda stung a little.”

Sunwoo visibly winces at that, looking away from the messages to make sure you are okay. “Ouch.”

“Yeah.” You huff, sinking further into the couch and mentally hoping it absorbs you completely. “I dunno it was just so… tense for that moment there. Felt like there was a lot to unpack. Mingi seemed to think so, too, because then he just switched to speaking in Korean and I took that as my cue to leave.”

“Do you remember what he said?” Sunwoo offers helpfully; you aren’t fluent in Korean by any means, but being friends with a whole band of Korean speakers and roommates with two of them forces you to pick some basics up over the years. Especially with Sunwoo practically acting as Eric’s personal tutor, as the latter didn’t learn to speak it growing up but was familiar enough with it for it to be easier for him to learn. Similarly, Kevin never learned it at home either, but was a lot better at self-studying than you were and had also been learning for a lot longer – you had only decided to really commit to it after moving in with the boys and hearing how much they would practice at home.

“I recognised the main words, I think. ‘You’, ‘red’, ‘ears’, and ‘lie’. Lying maybe? It doesn’t take a genius to figure out where that was going, though.”

Sunwoo nods, reaching down to play with your hair in a motion you think is supposed to be comforting. It does help. “That’s pretty awkward. How do you feel about it? What are you thinking?”

It’s in times like these when Sunwoo’s maturity shines through; while usually he’s one of the first to goof off and tease or get fired up and in his feelings, in contrast, he can often be very objective with other people’s issues.

“I feel… weird. Like I saw something I probably wasn’t meant to see,” you start with a sigh. It’s hard to place exactly what you’re feeling at first. “It was kind of… disheartening? The way Wooyoung talked about him and Mingi. I don’t know how to explain it, it was just so… uncomfortable. How he kept saying Mingi is basically like, above the rest of us, when I thought we all agreed that romantic relationships shouldn’t be the be-all-or-end-all of human connection because other bonds can be just as strong, but he kept emphasizing how what they have is so special and how he’s Mingi’s and no one else’s, and it’s like… what does that make us? I know he’s not our boyfriend, but I like to think we’re a lot more to him than just friends who get his dick wet.”

Sunwoo mulls it over for a moment, then stills the movements of his hands to give you a steadfast look.

“Do you want us to be more than friends?”

The question kicks your heartbeat into overdrive, suddenly picking up like you’re being chased by an unseen beast that could snuff you out at a moment’s notice. You try not to let that alarm show, but you have the gut feeling that Sunwoo picks up on it, at least on your hesitance to respond, so you open your mouth to say something before it looks like your silence has more meaning to it.

“No– yes? I mean, aren’t we already more than friends, in a way? Friends don’t usually do what we do. Is there not an in between friendship and dating? Since when were we the types to be stuck in singular boxes and labels, huh?”

Sunwoo doesn’t seem to buy it, shifting beneath your weight so you sit up to let him adjust his position and get more comfortable. What you don’t expect, is for him to instead swiftly cage you between him and the couch, towering over you with his eyes boring into yours. He doesn’t touch you, his hands placed firmly on either side of your head, but the proximity makes it feel like his whole weight is pushing down on you.

He says your name unwaveringly. “If friendship is just as strong and important as romance, why do you not want to consider us just as friends?”

Your voice gets caught in your throat. You want to ask why he has to be so, so close to ask you such a question, but the time it takes to gather your wits to reply is probably exactly the reason. You can’t lie to him like this, you can’t bluff or flounder or get anything past him. When he looks into your eyes like this, he sees everything beneath him, and in that moment, you feel more naked before him than you ever have been even without the presence of clothes.

“I… because it feels weird to call you guys my friends. Cause I have other friends, I’ve had close friends with benefits, too, but you guys are just… different. It feels different. You guys aren’t on the same level as people I call my friends,” you explain, hoping that it makes even a lick of sense, but you fear now that you’ve said it out loud it only serves to prove Sunwoo’s point.

Do you want to date them? You’ve been bouncing the idea around in your mind for a few years now, and you still don’t have a clear answer. When you first met San and Kevin, the answer was yes. For Wooyoung and Mingi, it was an ‘if only,’ but they were fresh in their relationship at the time, so you figured they were off-limits. Eric and Sunwoo you had figured any attraction to them was just physical and a result of you messing around with them while also developing a meaningful friendship beyond being an experiment or a booty call, but that didn’t necessarily mean you wanted to date them.

But as the band formed and you all grew closer, they quickly became the most important people in your lives by a long shot, people you’re closer with than you ever have been with anyone else, and that’s uncharted waters. Throwing sexual attraction into the mix only further muddies them, because is it that you’re attracted to them as a person in a romantic sense, or you’re attracted to them and the fact that you’re close to them as people and care for them deeply seem inherently romantic through that lens? Is it possible to be attracted to someone physically and love them platonically? Your logic tells you yes, of course, queerplatonic relationships of all kinds exist, but you’ve gotten to the point where you don’t know the difference anymore. Not when this type of relationship is all you’ve ever known, and you’ve enjoyed them too much to bother trying to pursue anything romantic with anyone. After all, explaining to any possible romantic interest that you don’t plan on stopping sleeping with your entire band and whoever else strikes your fancy, and that you and your band are so incredibly close and live together and spend basically all your spare time together, doesn’t usually score you any second dates.

It's not like that has bothered you much, though, perfectly content with what you have with them – they know you far better than any romantic interests ever have, so why would you bother when you already have almost everything you could ask for in a connection? But that only sounds like you’re already dating them, or at least treating it like you are but dodging the big scary ‘label’ question to not frighten them off and burst your bubble.

“You’re thinking really hard right now,” Sunwoo comments, smirking as he analyses your face. Why is he smirking? What does he think he just won? You can’t read his at all. What you do know is if he doesn’t just close the distance and kiss you already you might just explode, but he’s determined on running his mouth and for once in your life you feel helpless to stop him. He’d see right through your attempts at distraction. “Are you finally putting two and two together? Because what I see, is that Wooyoung talking about Mingi as the only one for him made you uncomfortable because you don’t want Mingi to be the only one for him. You want him to be ours, isn’t that right? You want him to be yours, too.”

You feel like the slightest slip of the tongue will end in instant regret, your last coherent thought fizzling out. “Are you trying to tease me right now, Sunwoo? I’m being serious.”

“So am I.” He moves one hand to pinch your chin between his thumb and index finger, making sure you can’t look away from his steadfast gaze. “Dead serious. Do you want to date us? Be romantic with us, tell us those three words you’ve been too scared to say for too long, take us on dates that are explicitly dates, call us yours? Is that what you want?”

How are you even meant to answer such a question? Do you? Don’t you? What would happen if you said yes? Or no? Your head is swimming – if the energy at Wooyoung and Mingi’s apartment felt suffocating, the tension now felt like walking a tightrope with a blindfold on. One wrong step, one wrong breath and you plummet to your untimely demise, but the tightrope you tread on is merely a thread and may snap at any moment regardless.

He says your name again, calling your attention back to him, awaiting an answer.

You don’t have one for him.

The door swings open so violently it bangs against the wall, San bursting in with a shout and his laptop in hand, screen facing toward you, and the most positively mind-blown expression on his face.

“You guys won’t fucking believe what I just found–! Oh. Uh.” His voice is booming until it’s not, dropping to the lowest of volumes once he sees you and Sunwoo’s position on the couch and the seriousness on your faces. Both you and Sunwoo break that contact to look at him in surprise, his equally surprised face staring right back at you. It’s laughable, even, how San has walked in on far less innocent interactions between you guys before, but it seems that even at a moments notice he can feel the thickness of the tension in the room. “Should I uh. Should I come back later? Am I interrupting something?”

You want to say yes, but it’s not like you had an answer for Sunwoo anyway. You suspect Sunwoo will tell him to leave so he can continue drilling you in private, but instead his attention catches on to whatever’s on San’s laptop. It’s porn, which isn’t very surprising, but Sunwoo cuts off whatever he was about to reply and narrows his eyes.

“Is that… Hyunjin?”

San is thrilled to launch into his story about how he was looking into camming as a potential source of income as he may or may not be about to get fired from the Snack Falcon he worked at after one too many shifts of just clocking on and leaving whenever he felt like it because hardly anyone shows up to that store anyway – “Ham Panther is literally right across the street,” he argued, “And they just sell the same shit, and more shit, for cheaper! Anyone who wants good food would have a better time at like, any other store that actually exists.” – but the final straw may or may not have been him and Eric smashing their old lights in the carpark at the back of the store when he was supposed to be closing.

“Jesus Christ, San,” you wheeze, “I’m honestly surprised it took them this long. Wait, but, wasn’t the reason they hadn’t fired you yet was because you were like, the only other employee they had?”

Sunwoo had given you a long, hard look before removing himself from you and letting San come in and go on about his story, which spoke all the words it needed to say. ‘We’ll come back to this later.’ You’re not sure you want to, but you’re happy indulge in San’s shenanigans for the time being and catch your breath again, even if it’s a struggle to shake off the heaviness of everything all at once so suddenly.

“Yeah, well, I was, but then this new guy joined, I think his name is Jeongin or something? I dunno, but it probably doesn’t matter since if he can take my shifts I’m probably done for. I’m at least gonna see a cut in my shifts, but also, I think the night shift guy is leaving, so there might be hope for me yet.”

“But not for your sleep schedule,” you joke, and San nods solemnly.

“Yup, no hope for that one. But anyway! Either way I was like, this probably won’t bode over well, and I’m hot as fuck so I might as well give a shot at being a camboy on the side? Like, seems easier than being a stripper, since I don’t have to learn how to dance or work a pole, and we have enough sex that I probably wouldn’t need to change much of my routine as much as just like, chucking on a camera every now and then. I could make sure your faces aren’t included in the shot, or I could just go solo. Helps to have an apartment to myself.”

“Keep flexing that on us, why don’t you?” Sunwoo huffs, rolling his eyes. He’s quieter than usual, but not enough for it to look like anything more than just being tired, but he’s no less sassy. “I’m less shocked you still have a job and more shocked that you can still pay for an apartment on your own.”

“Well, it helps that I don’t spend much on food,” San reasons, “Considering Wooyoung cooks enough to feed a small country and gets offended when we don’t eat it, and the rest of you guys don’t mind me raiding the fridge every other night or so.”

You snort. “Who said we don’t mind? You know the rule, if there’s only one left it’s not yours – take the last slice of pizza again and I will fucking end you, Choi San.”

He guiltily covers his hand with his mouth. “Oops! Enough of that though, so long story short I heard this site was pretty safe and pays well so I take a look to see what my competition would be like, and lo and behold… the one and only Stray Kids’ Hwang Hyunjin’s cock, balls and ass, first thing on my laptop screen. Viola!”

Placing himself on the couch next to you two with his laptop on his knees for you to see, he clicks play. You only recognise the man after your thorough Instagram stalking from earlier, but it’s definitely him – he doesn’t cover his face at all, the side of it pressed to the mattress with his ass up in the air, stuffed with a pink toy, hands tied behind his back and hard, leaking cock on full display for the camera, trapped in a cock ring that keeps vibrating around him. You wonder how he’s planning to untie himself after he finishes – or how he tied his own wrists behind his back anyway, and if he did that on camera or before turning it on, because there doesn’t seem to be anyone else with him. He must’ve been live for a while now because he looks on the brink of tears as the buzzing stops, brokenly whining and writhing on the bed.

“Please,” he whimpers, shamelessly shoving his hips down on the mattress where he’s stained it with his pre-cum already in an attempt to get any kind of stimulation while bound, “Please let me come. I’ve been so good for you guys, please, I was so, so close…!”

You can’t deny that the visual – hell, the audio too – is hot. Anyone with eyes, ears and a sexual attraction to men would agree on that much. While you thought you’d probably end up zoning out and overthinking your interactions with your bandmates the whole time, you find yourself instead transfixed with the performer on the screen and his alternative form of performance. Does his band know about this, you wonder? If not, it could be quite the juicy secret to leverage later. Regardless, heat simmers beneath your skin with every one of Hyunjin’s whiny pleas.

The chat is moving so fast you almost can’t keep up with it. But you do notice the sudden influx of donations, and suddenly the buzzing resumes again and Hyunjin’s whole body jolts as he squirms to get back on his knees so the camera can see his dick again. He doesn’t seem like he’s acting or playing much up, eyes glazed over and breathing heavy in between his honey-sweet moans. He’s so unfathomably pretty that even fucked out like this, he looks picturesque.

“Don’t come…? Guys please, please just let me come, haah, I’ll- I’ll put on such a pretty show for you I p-promise!”

San shamelessly adjusts the raging hard-on in his pants as you watch, hand hovering over the tracking pad. “So he’s managed to hook up both a cock ring and a vibrator to the site’s donations, but there’s options both to make it vibrate but also to make it stop, which I’ve never really seen before. It’s like a bidding war between the ones who want to edge him and the ones who want to make him come, which might be hell for him but holy hell is he raking in mad cash that way.”

“That’s actually so smart,” you hum thoughtfully, “Leveraging control freaks’ need for control to make even more money. Guess the orgasm denial enthusiasts are winning tonight, huh?”

“Do you think this is how they afforded all that fancy shit for their stage? Look, that guy just donated a hundred bucks to edge him again. If I can make this much money off camming, I can quit Snack Falcon for good and get like a day’s worth of pay in an hour or two!”

Sunwoo isn’t even paying attention to what he’s saying, fixated on the view on the screen and the sounds of Hyunjin’s whimpering filtering from the speakers. He slips a hand down the waistband of his pants and boxers to stroke himself languidly, wetting his lips. “He’s fucking hot.”

Jerking off to porn together isn’t exactly the most common activity between the renegades, but it’s not unheard of, either, if one of you happen to stumble across something hot enough to be worth sharing. It’s just that most of the time, with so many options readily available, you don’t really need to look for porn when the group chat’s attachments are full of it, and you could create an equally hot or even hotter scenario yourselves.

It’s still normal enough that you all just fall into it naturally without talking about it, San also tugging his cock free to jerk it a lot hastier than Sunwoo, obviously riled up from the moment he entered the apartment, shamelessly letting his head fall back and a groan filter from his lips at the sight. “He’s so fucking hot it’s unfair.”

Unfair to who? You think San is arguably just as breathtaking, but it doesn’t seem like the right time to voice that thought, especially after everything that just happened, so you keep that part to yourself and simply take in the sight of him, jaw clenched and almost fucking into his fist before turning back to the screen.

“Yeah, no kidding. Perfect face, perfect body, I can’t really say I’m surprised people are paying hundreds just to have their way with him,” you mutter in awe, working your fly undone because that visual is enough to make you throb but the sounds just make it maddening. Is that how desperate he usually sounds, or is that just him on camera? You’re itching to find out, already having decided on your next target for your borderline malicious flirting.

To your surprise, Sunwoo slaps your hands away with his free one before you can slip them down your underwear, but before you can protest or ask why he replaces it with his own, quick to rub at your enlarged clit without any of his usual teasing. You’re not sure if he just feels like it, or if it has anything to do with the conversation you were having before San interrupted, but if that is the case you’re not exactly sure what the message he’s trying to give is supposed to be. You don’t oppose to it though, happy to reach over and grab his dick instead, but he doesn’t let you do that either, clearly insistent on you not doing any of the work and him getting both of you off. You’re almost shocked that San doesn’t complain at being left out, but he’s not even looking at you two, just at Hyunjin’s trembling form on his laptop.

“O-Oh fuck, my love– my loves, I’m close, please, please let me come, d-don’t you think I deserve it? Ha-ah… please…!”

He desperately glances somewhere beyond the camera, and that answers your question from earlier; someone lucky is in the room with him – you wonder who, whether it’s a partner, a bandmate, or some else, but the thought doesn’t occupy you for long as much as the thought of him liking an audience even without a camera – watching as Hyunjin’s mouth falls open in a silent plea; please. He must be truly at his limit if he’s asking someone to interfere with his viewer’s wishes just for the sake of his orgasm, but the beautiful distress on his face tells you that whoever is on the other side of the camera isn’t budging. You like seeing him a mess like this, rather than the pretty and powerful man you saw on stage and talking to Felix at the Prism, and knowing that he’s your competition has you hoping they prolong his suffering just a bit longer; the thought of seeing him break and cry along with the feeling of Sunwoo’s skilled fingers between your legs has you almost dizzy.

“San, make him turn it off.”

“Wait, what?” San finally looks at you, hands balled into fists by your side as Sunwoo continues working his magic. “Like, turn off the stream or–“

“No, donate like twenty bucks to turn it off, I’ll pay you back later– I just hope no one pays higher to keep it on…”

“You’re cruel,” San scoffs, but he’s grinning just as sadistically as you as he sets up the donation to turn off the cock ring and the vibrator at the same time, and to your luck, as soon as the donation goes through, Hyunjin’s body goes limp as both toys immediately turn off.

“No, no, no, please let me come!” Hyunjin borderline screams, voice cracking under the strain as tears stain his pretty cheeks. His hips twitch in search of the stimulation he just lost, but within seconds he’s spurting cum all over his stomach and the sheets beneath him completely untouched, gasping and thrashing around on the bed. “No, fuck, no, please…”

He sobs into the sheets, the muscles in his arms bulging with effort to free himself from his restraints, but the moment passes and his dick is still achingly hard and an angry red from his ruined orgasm. His ruined orgasm after being edged for possibly hours by strangers, the orgasm that you decided to ruin just to see him squirm.

The rush of power hits you all at once, and with the addition of Sunwoo rubbing at your clit with vigour, you follow after Hyunjin, hips bucking up into Sunwoo’s warm hand as your high rolls through you in waves. You don’t make much noise beyond a brief groan, wanting to hear Hyunjin continue to plead, higher-pitched this time as the toys turn on again to overstimulate him after having his orgasm ruined. He’s an absolute wreck, covered in sweat, tears and cum, hair sticking to his face and framing his head on the mattress like a crown, and you find yourself coming harder than you usually would just from rubbing one out with someone’s fingers.

Sunwoo smirks, retracting his hand and licking them clean, moaning at the taste as he finishes in his own fist, grunting lowly at the feeling. Wanting to repay his generosity, you lean over and take his dick in your mouth, sucking it clean and making him twitch wildly at the oversensitivity, but you move to suck his fingers clean instead before it becomes too much, and he strokes your hair affectionately with his free hand as a silent thank you.

San is a lot louder as he gets closer, moaning and biting his lip, face scrunched up in pleasure. “Me next, please, I’m so close, just–“ He gently holds the back of your head, and you allow him to lead you to his cock and take the tip in your mouth, wrapping your hand around the base while you suck. “Fuck! Yes, just like that, thank you, fuck, I’m gonna come– can you– can I–“

You hum in confirmation, swirling your tongue around him and making sure to drag the ball of your piercing along the underside of the sensitive head just the way he likes it, and he comes within seconds, emptying his load on your tongue. As hot as the action is, it doesn’t taste great, probably due to the amount of americanos he’s been drinking as of late – so, feeling a little cheeky, you lean up to kiss him in his post-orgasm glow, and make sure to shove your tongue in his mouth and give you a taste of himself.

“Mmh–!” He makes a cutely disgruntled noise as you, for all practical purposes, spit his cum back in his mouth, but he doesn’t push you off him right away. When he does, he clicks his tongue a few times with a scrunched nose, tasting himself, then sticks his tongue out. “Okay, loud and clear, you don’t have to say it.”

You snicker at that, happy with your petty revenge and his endearingly peeved expression. “Less coming in my mouth till you lessen your coffee intake, ya nasty.”

San chuckles, covering his face with his arm in mild embarrassment. Only mild – it would probably be far more embarrassing with a partner or a hook-up, but the runaways unique closeness shines through once more as it doesn’t seem to bother him or ruin the moment. There wasn’t much of a moment to ruin, really – it was simply a casual release between friends. Bandmates. Whatever. It was casual, is the point, and comfortable enough to pick on each other like this and for him to dismiss it. “Yeah, yeah. Maybe I’ll invest in some pineapple juice or something.”

Sunwoo simply snorts at the exchange, tucking himself back into his pants and getting up. “Alright, I’m gonna go get us dinner, San are you staying?”

He beams, dimples on full display, charming as can be. “If you would be so kind, yes please.”

The other man simply rolls his eyes as he grabs his keys and goes to slip his shoes on. “I’m only so generous to you because you effectively pay for all our snacks by not looking while on duty.” He turns to you just as he’s about to head out the door. “Give some thought to what we were talking about earlier.”

San glances at you in confusion at you at that, but you don’t pay him any mind. “I think I wanna hear your answer first, mister.”

Sunwoo quirks a brow, the slightest of smirks pulling at his plush lips. That damn infuriating smirk that you usually love but is now driving you an entirely foreign kind of crazy that you are not equipped to deal with.

“Hm. I think that in itself tells me yours.”

He doesn’t give you a chance to elaborate or respond, stepping out into the hallway and shutting the door behind him, leaving you feeling as exposed as Hyunjin was on the screen moments earlier. Of course he has to get the last word in, that ass – but the implications of it haunt you all the way to your bed that night, staring at the ceiling, while Sunwoo sleeps with an arm around you like nothing – or maybe everything? – ever happened.

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