#stuff we split it between us

[dragons-in-spaceee]

The fear my bank account feels every time comic-con approaches…

#LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT LAST YEAR #so the tickets are honestly decent price. not expensive #stuff at stalls is also decent price and there’s TONNES of sales at basically every stall #BUT me and my friend are extremely stupid when placed in front of star trek merch #we ended up spending a rather large amount of money cause we’d both want stuff from a stall #then realise there was like a ‘5 for £25’ sale on or whatever #and agree to split it between us so we could get the good #but let’s just say I ended up buying a few more things than I would’ve otherwise #came home with like 10 books and 4? 5? posters #plus a bunch of other stuff #it doesn’t sound like a lot but it was aksjakdj

[simonstamenovic]

NOT PUBLISHING THE ASK EVEN TJO ITZ PROB FINE but mwah thankz also aware we cld dm u bbut i hit new post n am lazy but mwah mwah mwah

#00 #for full disclosure we also dont like idk have any diff memories btwen the facets we consider ourselves halfsies or idk #at base we feel abunch of kins n then this is stronger stuff we r split between it #pandora says we r all part of it n we protest even tho its all kinda blurred IDK BUT UM <33 #GENUINELY YES itz like not a viable thing #I THINK part of why we feel the need 2 disclose is the lack of like idk not lost #time but... we r all kind of like stuck together #n our presentation iz what distinguishes us the most #like the memory is shared n we dont oftern feel like fully distinct buit this is...? #cvomfortable???? idk idk if yhsy mskrd sense #this body dud nothing but watch tv alone as a child n didnt develop properlie LMAO

[sunjoys]

i hate customers i need to gnaw their arms off pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls

#hen party from hell today at work #my coworker who was taking their order did fuck up a few times im ngl (like she kept going back to check stuff etc altho she did get #it all correct once it was put through to the kitchen) #but like i KNOW our service overall wasnt that bad bc a table that arrived at the same time + similar size tipped us 20 eur and said #“everything was great” #but like !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the hen party !!! ohhhh my god . #17 people all trying to pay separately . i need my workplace to set up a policy of no splitting bill more than idk 5 times #anyway when there was about 5 ppl left my coworker was like “would you mind splitting the bill between you? it would make things simpler” #they said sure and paid #AND THEN THE BRIDE (?) CAME UP TO US AFTER AND OCMPLAINED #amongst other things she was like “halfway through paying you told us we couldnt pay separately and at the start u said we could” #GIRL MY COWORKER ASKED IF YOU COULD SPLIT IT BETWEEN YOUS. YOU COULDVE JUST SAID “NO WE WANT TO PAY SEPARATELY” #LIKE YOU HAVE THE POWER HERE #i just .. .. we told the manager after she complained and he was chill abt it lol #but then she SENT AN EMAIL. WITH PHYSICAL DESCRIPTIONS OF US #“the one w nose piercings the blonde the redhead etc” like jesus crhist. if i gave you a gun you would def shoot me without hesitation #anyway . im sooo. i just had a coffee so now im like intensified. and i have to do hashtag homework mmm yummy #long post #<- in case the long tags r a pain. i probably couldve made a separate post but i couldnt be bothered to be quite honest. anywya. <3 #live laugh love guys <33

[justalittlebluetiefling]

I loved reading everyone’s thoughts on the roll announcements, but now I feel like I need to make sure everyone knows that I love the DM at my table. I really enjoy his playstyle and he’s always very concerned with making sure that we’re all having a fun and healthy time. The poor guy works so hard to balance combat (because most of us are ridiculously hard to hit) and then keeps giving us these wild magic items and making it that much harder for himself. But like, the amount of stuff he gives us? It’s very cool of him and I really enjoy playing in this world he’s built in his head.

#erin plays d&d #like he started the campaign by giving us each a homebrewed magic item (that required attunement) #that he built specifically for our characters #and he just gives us so much gold and so many cool magic items #our reward for this marathon combat was: #+1 to any of our abilities #10k gold to split between the 4 of us #and a brand new super cool magic item for EACH of us #like i now have an amulet of the devout +2 #WHICH IS WILD #i can now channel divinity 3 times a day (assuming we short rest) #also the boost to my spell attack and spell save dc is super helpful #AND we also hit level 7 today #so finishing that fight it was like #he just started giving us so much stuff that my brain stopped functioning #personal

[nexus-nebulae]

huh. we just actually 100% do not have the ability to know who we are without mirroring or comparing to someone else

#i genuinely have zero knowledge of how to describe myself and never have #this probably has some connection to systemness #don't know what caused what tho cause i don't remember my childhood LMAO #are we system because we're autistic guy who's horrendous at self-reflection? #or are we horrendous at self-reflection because we're an autistic system? #from what we DO remember about our childhood we've. kind of always been like this #not just with the reflection stuff but like our memories always have some sort of system egg flair #even if we might not have been a proper system then like. i think it was probably inevitable for us to be one eventually #have NO IDEA when the system Actually Started #like- i don't know when the real first proper split was #but i do know in middle school we were DEFINITELY a system already lol #bc we were genuinely different people between school and home #and by the time of high school we had a bunch of different names and everything just not the word 'system' #also we've been writing and obsessing over possession/multiple-souls-in-one-body stories since we were 12 so #definitely some egg shit there #i just don't know if it started then. or when we were an elementary schooler. or if we've Always been like this. or what #idk man Brain Weird

[sirpepperston]

one of my long time best friends(the one who got engaged last month) offered to rent a house with me and my bf last night.......

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE I WANT TO I WANT TO LIVE IN A HOUSE WITH THE PEOPLE I LOVE

#its also cheaper to get a two bedroom and split the cost between the four of us rather than for me and bf to get a one bedroom #a one bedroom apartment here in the shit parts of town is around 1k #there are studio apartments here that are $900 a month #and a 2 bedroom house in the nicer parts of the city are like 1.6k sooo...... #i know bills and stuff will be higher bc theres four of us #but overall it would be cheaper #bf and i want a one bedroom together and we're gonna try for that first but we're both cool with living with the two of them #so its good to have that option #its awesome tho bc i wanted to ask them if we could do that but they came to me and offered it first #and those friends are like the most responsible and hard working people i know too so i think it would be a good situation #tbh if theres anyone id want to share a house with its the two of them so im glad we've got this option

[ouchhq]

do i just not care about myself or are other people more selfish

#last night i was at a friends house and her mom and her brothers gf were there as well and they talked about their stuff the whole time and #i was just there which is okay but it made me think u know not everyone worries about making others feel involved all the time #and then my friend was kinda irritated and we had to take a car and it was implied that we had to take mine and she just walked out of the #house in the rain and i was still putting my shoes on and she didnt even bother to wait for me and just took off towards the car #and the same was when we got back #and it kinda made me feel unwanted like? i would never do that like i always wait for everyone #and another instance made me think #when i was with other friends and we were at a pizzeria and we got a big ass pizza for 4 which we split between the 4 of us #and we had 4 different flavors and we split each into 4 slices so we could all taste them all and one of my friends #was the one cutting the slices and she would cut them and choose her slice first (clearly the best and/or biggest one) and put it on her #plate and i didnt really care too much but it made me think like .. when im serving something i am always the last to get served u know and #i always make sure i give others the best first #and there are other instances but these things just added to my perception of how i always think about myself and others #and how apparently many other people dont care as much about others more than themselves #im not necessarily critiquing its just striking me more and more

[epilepticbipolar]

.

#dear friend #i hope you are well #we dont talk anymore and my messages hardly get a reply #but I want you to know I am not mad #our lives have split into different directions i guess #and although its just natural #i miss you and the stuff we used to get into #im sorry if it seems like i abandoned you #i promise it didnt do it knowingly or with intent #i think about you wvery day #and although im sad that you dont want to interact #i understand if youve moved on #i dont consider this friendship over #its just changed #i hope that when you want to talk to me again #we can just go on like there was no time wasted between then and now #i love you so much #im still here and always will be #im sorry I grew up #but im doing good #just sad I cant share it with you #i guess im afraid youve written me off without telling me #wouldnt be the first time a friendship of mine ended like that #im afraid you bear some anger towards me and want to scold me like a past friend of ours #but even if you do that #at least I'll know how you feel #its weird that i prefer you yelling at mw over you not saying anything haha #anyway #i hope youll reach out soon #thanks <3

[headspace-hotel]

I will write this thought about Veganism and Classism in the USA in another post so as to not derail the other thread:

There are comments in the notes that say meat is only cheaper than plant based foods because of subsidies artificially lowering the price of meat in the United States. This is...part of the story but not all of it.

For my animal agriculture lab we went to a butcher shop and watched the butcher cut up a pig into various cuts of meat. I have had to study quite a bit about the meat industry in that class. This has been the first time I fully realized how strongly the meat on a single animal is divided up by socioeconomic class.

Like yes, meat cumulatively takes more natural resources to create and thus should be more expensive, but once that animal is cut apart, it is divided up between rich and poor based on how good to eat the parts are. I was really shocked at watching this process and seeing just how clean and crisp an indicator of class this is.

Specifically, the types of meat I'm most familiar with are traditionally "waste" parts left over once the desirable parts are gone. For example, beef brisket is the dangly, floppy bit on the front of a cow's neck. Pork spareribs are the part of the ribcage that's barely got anything on it.

And that stuff is a tier above the "meat" that is most of what poor people eat: sausage, hot dogs, bologna, other heavily processed meat products that are essentially made up of all the scraps from the carcass that can't go into the "cuts" of meat. Where my mom comes from in North Carolina, you can buy "livermush" which is a processed meat product made up of a mixture of liver and a bunch of random body parts ground up and congealed together. There's also "head cheese" (made of parts of the pig's head) and pickled pigs' feet and chitlin's (that's made of intestines iirc) and cracklin's (basically crispy fried pig skin) and probably a bunch of stuff i'm forgetting. A lot of traditional Southern cooking uses basically scraps of animal ingredients to stretch across multiple meals, like putting pork fat in beans or saving bacon grease for gravy or the like.

So another dysfunctional thing about our food system, is that instead of people of each socioeconomic class eating a certain number of animals, every individual animal is basically divided up along class lines, with the poorest people eating the scraps no one else will eat (oftentimes heavily processed in a way that makes it incredibly unhealthy).

Even the 70% lean ground beef is made by injecting extra leftover fat back into the ground-up meat because the extra fat is undesirable on the "better" cuts. (Gross!)

I've made, or eaten, many a recipe where the only thing that makes it non-vegan is the chicken broth. Chicken broth, just leftover chicken bones and cartilage rendered and boiled down in water? How much is that "driving demand" for meat, when it's basically a byproduct?

That class really made me twist my brain around about the idea of abstaining from animal products as a way to deprive the industry of profits. Nobody eats "X number of cows, pigs, chickens in a lifetime" because depending on the socioeconomic class, they're eating different parts of the animal, splitting it with someone richer or poorer than they are. If a bunch of people who only ate processed meats anyway abstained, that wouldn't equal "saving" X number of animals, it would just mean the scraps and byproducts from a bunch of people's steaks or pork chops would have something different happen to them.

The other major relevant conclusion I got from that class, was that animal agriculture is so dominant because of monoculture. People think it's animal agriculture vs. plant agriculture (or plants used for human consumption vs. using them to feed livestock), but from capitalism's point of view, feeding animals corn is just another way to use corn to generate profits.

People think we could feed the world by using the grain fed to animals to feed humans, but...the grain fed to animals, is not actually a viable diet for the human population, because it's literally just corn and soybean. Like animal agriculture is used to give some semblance of variety to the consumer's diet in a system that is almost totally dominated by like 3 monocrops.

Do y'all have any idea how much of the American diet is just corn?!?! Corn starch, corn syrup, corn this, corn that, processed into the appearance of variety. And chickens and pigs are just another way to process corn. That's basically why we have them, because they can eat our corn. It's a total disaster.

And it's even worse because almost all the USA's plant foods that aren't the giant industrial monocrops maintained by pesticides and machines, are harvested and cared for by undocumented migrant workers that get abused and mistreated and can't say anything because their boss will tattle on them to ICE.

#agriculture #it's so messed up #plants #livestock

[castellla]

i like the phrase 'manic features' specifically, because features really gives a 'sick-ass touchless trashcan by simplehuman at bed bath and beyond that costs $499.99 and also cooks, cleans, and fucks your wife if you're both into that' kinda vibe.

#*bats eyes* but my features. #i'm covered in an oleophobic coating that resists fingerprints... *saucy wink* that's also a Lie you will see Every fingerprint #the feature i'm seeing so far is: i guess you can write a lot in a short amount of time huh me-chan #(side note i DON'T know if this describes me; im not a doctor and i havent been diagnosed with anything specific to my knowledge) #(but also yknow. my doctor didn't NOT mention it so.... (o v o); #this is just the joke about taylor tomlinson being flattered to find out selena gomez also had bipolar but with more words #in fact why did i specifically and unironically choose: a trash can? #*BECAUSE IM PASSIONATE ABOUT CLEANLINESS AND HUMANIST PRODUCT DESIGN BITCH WE OWE SANITATION WORKERS OUR FUCKING LIVES* #i'm comparing myself to the fucking rolls royce of trashcans (in my experience) because i love them and can't help being a leo #'this price makes me wanna gag but also wanna roll around in how smart i feel for having bought this particular model because it's so nice' #konmari please help. konmari outside of what seems to be a fucked up-ly contractory level of marketing #og konmari circa 2015 - yea use whatever kind of boxes you have on hand you don't to buy a bunch of stuff to organize #konmari circa now - (yeah yeah she did kind of 'sold out' with the container store Specifically because if you haven't been? #it is paradise for me (an organizing Dweeb) #but it's also mouth-droppingly expensive at times #they do make good products. i'm sure her line of products with them are popular #but it kinda does hurt to have HER name of all people on an $80 magazine tray? #and i'm not saying one is more correct than the other - truly i feel like she pushed for an ethos of 'do what works for you' #'and don't let other people shame you for getting what you want and need out of your home' #like. she has kids and a husband. aside from in home organizing - not sure how much of her time is split between actual client visits #time with family and time doing big BIG projects for netflix her publishers i presume etc. #and the container store deal... like i truly hope she got to be part of the creative process and was consulted about it #including the design elements and things like that #but also the price? #its def nice to have the option to buy something really pretty and im sure some people have bought it and enjoyed it #but it's really hard to swallow #because i think her method has appeal that can extend to people outside of an income bracket that lets them go 'oh fuck yeah!' #'konmari walnut hand stained wood tray?! you got it! *CLICKS BUY*' #but even though i'm painfully in her corner #i can't commonly justify things that are that expensive simply for branding's sake

[uglyducklingofthe2000s]

Pamper Yourself (Girls Night series) - LN

Summary: Lando is no stranger to involving himself in girls nights, especially when they're getting all the skincare and haircare stuff out, and the girls are more than happy to talk him through

Friends names: Zara, Martha and Eden

Lando is actually at a Quadrant shoot that's finally wrapping up, slightly later that they had planned to finish up. Because he knows y/n is having a girls night and while he hadn't told her, he fully intended to crash the night with no apologies.

"What's the rush, man?" Max laughs as Lando rushes through goodbyes.

"Y/n is having a girls night." Lando grins making Max roll his eyes.

"You know, you earn the label of a bad boyfriend if you crash girls nights all the time. They don't like it." Max states earning a pause but Lando seems to consider his words for all of a split second before shrugging it off.

He definitely speeds home and when he arrives, the soft sound of music fills the apartment. Slightly overpowered by four female voice all chattering away as they speak to each other.

"Baby?!" Lando calls out making the voice quiet down before he walks in.

"I told you so! I told you he'd come in here crashing out night." Zara exclaims as y/n smiles at her boyfriend. "You know it's called girls night for a reason."

"Will you stop being a bitch? Ignore her, Lando. She's been in a bad mood all day and now she's bringing it here." Martha states then looking at y/n who just shakes her head.

"You're always more than welcome." Eden smiles as Lando picks up a headband and puts it on.

"It's a good thing he doesn't care or you might've hurt his feelings." Martha murmurs as she continues painting a face mask onto Zara's face.

Y/n smiles as Lando gets closer to her and she adjusts the headband for him.

"Why is she in such a bad mood with me?" Lando whispers making y/n laugh while Zara huffs.

"Zara got a disciplinary at work from her boss today, and her boss is a man so she's boycotting men." Eden explains simply making her look at him for a moment. "She's the only one boycotting men."

"Oh right, ok." Lando nods while y/n smiles and kisses him lightly.

"Ok, wash your face. Use the face scrub on the side too, you need to exfoliate. Then come back and pick a mask, I'll put it on for you." Y/n instructs making him move to the bathroom.

"It's pretty cute that he always wants to be involved." Martha states while he's out the room. "Does he stick on routine outside of the girls nights?"

"No. Sometimes I can force him to properly moisturise. But generally, he scrubs his face and then just lets it dry and get's on with his day. I think he considers the girls nights good enough to last him."

"Y/n, we have these nights once ever like 2 or 3 months if we can all find a day we're free. I'm going to lecture him." Zara declares earning a shared look of amusement from her friends.

"Poor Lando." Eden mumbles then looking at y/n. "You should warn him."

Y/n laughs just as Lando walks in looking fresh faced and clean as he moves to the selection of face masks.

"Can I have this one?" He asks picking up a pink clay mask.

"Yeah, of course you can." Y/n laughs before she takes it from him, then jumping up on the counter and smiling as he immediately moves to stand between her legs. "You exfoliated, right?"

"Yes. That's the uhhh...gritty stuff in a tube."

"I love the way men's brains work." Martha comments in awe of his way of describing a face scrub. "Well sometimes I do." A quick correction following a glare from Zara.

"So dramatic." Y/n mumbles earning a small smile from Lando before she starts putting the mask on for him. Neither noticing Eden capture a couple photos of the moments since she has appointed herself as the group historian, documenting everything. From the good to the bad. She's got pictures of everything. "How does the mask feel?"

"Good. Cold." Lando smiles as his hands rub on her thighs just as a means of fiddling and keeping his hands occupied while she continues to put the mask on his skin. "Are you guys ordering food?"

"Baby...we went out for dinner. Are you hungry?" Y/n questions looking a little worried from the idea that her boyfriend might be worried. "We can order food if you're hungry."

"No. I ate at work." Lando smiles shaking his head while she nods before placing the mask down. "Done?"

"Yeah, you're all done 15 minutes then wash it off-who wants to choose Lando's serums and moisturiser?" Y/n asks since she knows he actually likes when the other girls offer up their serums. The man looks at them like they're secret potions that girls gatekeeper from men.

"I'll choose." Eden smiles making Lando move over almost like a toddler.

Y/n smiles shaking her head as Zara jumps up and sits next to her.

"Would you like me to do a face mask for you? You're the only one without one." Zara smiles earning a nod and as Zara starts putting a gold peel mask on the young woman. "For the record, I'm not against Lando being here."

"I know. He knows too." Y/n laughs lightly then patting her lap. "Are you feeling a little better at least? I know we had this planned anyway, but we were all hoping the girls night might help perk you up."

"Yeah, I am. Dinner definitely helped. I think I was pretty hangry."

"I felt that on a spiritual level." Y/n hums before Zara mumbles the mask is done. "We're here for you. Even Lando."

"Yeah, definitely me." Lando confirms appear in front of them.

"Baby, don't smile. You're cracking your mask." Y/n giggles making his face straighten as he hand reaches up to his curls and she sighs. "Z...can you do his hair? You're the best at doing with curly hair and he doesn't take care of them."

"Yeah. I got him, suppose I owe you a sorry for your earlier greeting." Zara hums looking at his hair from a distance.

After Lando washes his mask off, Eden layers his face with a clarifying and vitamin c serum before following up with a moisturiser that definitely gives him a glow.

Y/n and Martha end up helping choose some serums and a moisturiser for each other before following up with putting a hair mask on each other's hair.

"You better not waste my efforts with these curls, Norris." Zara warns as she has him lean over the sink to get the deep conditioning mask she's put into his locks since apparently they'd really dried out.

"You have my word. I'll maintain it." Y/n promises earning a grin from her boyfriend. "Drags me in the shower with him all the time anyway."

"TMI." Zara groans then splashing Lando's face with water when he smirks. "Don't smirk, perv."

"Hey, be nice." Martha scolds then flicking water at Zara while she rinses Lando's hair.

"I am being nice."

"Lando, call it."

"You got soap in my eye." Lando states rubbing at his eye.

"Ok, I'm sorry. I didn't meant to do that." Zara laughs then patting his shoulder before she finishes washing his hair. "Sit up."

Zara finishes laying products on his hair before drying it for him and admittedly, his curls haven't looked so good even fresh from the barber.

By the end of the night, every single one of them are transformed to an extent. But of course when Eden captures a video showing everyone's finished look, y/n and Lando are too caught up in each other's attention and when Lando reposts it on his story, it's safe to say fans go pretty feral over the knowledge he gets involved in girls nights.

"Good thing there was no give away of Zara's disapproval otherwise she'd be getting feasted on by your fans." Martha jokes earning a middle finger from the grumpy girl.

"Just wait till you guys have guys to bring to girls night. We'll have to stop calling it girls night." Y/n laughs while Lando pulls her up onto his lap rather than squished up beside him.

"No. Nuh-uh. We'll have a room to push them all into, they can babysit each other." Zara states earning a sharp look from Lando. "Hey, what you looking at me like that for?"

"I'm not being kicked out of girls night just because you lot finally get into relationships." Lando declares making y/n almost choke on her spit since she really wasn't expecting him to be so offended by the idea of not being able to take part in the girls night anymore.

"Could just have a group date night?" Eden suggests earning murmurs of agreement to that plan. "And the non-pampering girls nights remain as no boys allowed. Since Lando doesn't join in for those anyway."

"All in favour say aye." Martha nods making them all say aye, even Zara.

Taglist: @namgification @hiireadstuff @jsjcue @geniusalpaca @itsjustkhaos @llando4norris @partyinpitlane @lpab @xoscar03 @thehufflepuffavenger1

#f1 #fanfic #formula 1 #lando norris #lando norris x reader #lando norris imagine #ln4 x reader #lando norris x y/n #lando x reader #lando #norris #lando norris mclaren #lando norris one shot #lando norris fanfic #f1 x reader #lando norris fluff #lando norris x you #lando norris f1 #ln4 x y/n #ln4 imagine #ln4 fic #ln4 fluff #ln4 x you #mclaren f1 #mclaren formula 1 #ln4 #ln4 one shot #ln4 fanfic #ln4 f1 #f1 fanfic

[angelltheninth]

Can you write threesome/poly relationship hds with Simon and Soap? And how they fuck their girl alone VS together?

You know what's better then one big guy? Two big guys!

Pairing: Simon "Ghost" Riley, John "Soap" MacTavish x Fem!Reader

Tags: nsfw, smut, poly relationship, threesome, rough sex, praise, blowjob, double penetration, creampie, size kink, dirty talk

A/N: Oh to be in between them and their massive chest.

SIMON

When Simon has you all to himself he makes sure you're eyes are locked on him. His gloved hand pulls your head back to you look into his eyes, the only thing you can see from his mask. "Ya look at me when I'm fuckin ya." His fingers spread you open, just under his cock so you can feel even more empty when he pulls out, "Hm? Does my pretty princess want my cock back in 'er cunt?" He taunts, pulling out fully and letting you see how hard he is, how much cum he's wasting when he isn't inside of you. Your pussy is entirely spread open and display for him, "I love it when ya beg for my big cock. Don't worry princess, ya know I'm here to take care of you."

JOHN

John seems like he lives to have his cock in your mouth. At least once a day you find yourself with his cock next to your face. "Missed my pretty girl today. Are you gonna be good and suck my cock?" You're always good for him. But this once you start with slow kisses, feeling his cock twitch against your lips in anticipation. As your hand wraps around the base you seal your lips around him, "That's the stuff." He cooes right before surprising you by pushing his cock to the back of your throat. "I did say I missed you. You bet I missed your holes just as much." Which is why he needed to use them all.

SIMON + JOHN

John loves having you against him, your boobs shaking in his face when Simon's cock pushes in beside his to split you open. "Our little princess. She can barely take my cock, but look at at that little pussy taking us both." He crunches over you, half pinning you down while John pushes your ass further up so he has more room beneath you. "Ass up pretty girl, we can't do all the work here. Else all our cum's gonna spill out." You hear Simon chuckling behind you, hammering his cock in you in perfect rhythm, making your pussy empty, clenching around nothing and then stuffed full of two cocks at the same time. They're in perfect sync, perfect teamwork to shoot your cunt beyond full of cum.

#cod x reader #mw2 x reader #ghost x reader #john soap mactavish x reader #cod headcanons #cod imagine #call of duty x reader #cod smut #call of duty smut #mw2 x you #mw2 imagine #mw2 headcanons #mw2 smut #mw3 x reader #mw3 headcanons #mw3 imagine #mw3 smut #call of duty #cod #x female reader

[amuseoffyre]

I’m emotionally ruined by the fact that Aziraphale hasn’t broken out of his heavenly conditioning. He still loves doing good. He gets happy when people tell him he’s an angel and says “it’s nice to tell people about the good things you’ve done now that I’m not reporting to Heaven”. He will literally put himself in harm’s way to make sure he does the Good and Right thing.

It can’t be understated how much Heaven’s influence still impacts on him. Aziraphale has been created, ordained and conditioned to believe it and he can’t just switch it off or walk away. Crowley didn’t get the choice. He was Fallen. He was kicked out and - as per the rules of toxic and terrifying cults - Aziraphale was always told for centuries and millennia, Falling was the worst thing that could happen. If you’re bad, you’ll be forced out. If you’re bad, you’re not one of Us. You’re one of Them.

When he did something he perceived as Right (ie. saving innocent children from death), but knew it wasn’t what Heaven intended, he broke down. Crowley found him a crying, shaking wreck afterwards because he was so convinced he was Evil. He was so convinced he was going to be dragged to Hell and that he was now a demon because he did one thing that saved some children but because it wasn’t a specific directive, it was Bad.

It shapes so much about him and it’s why the whole series looks like he’s having so much fun doing silly human things, but there’s this brittleness to it. He’s happy and excited and he’s doing his human-life things and having a lovely time, but he’s also constantly stressed because of the Need To Do Good. From the moment Gabriel turns up, he’s a nervous wreck and is trying to hide it by Doing Good, by Solving the Problem, by Fixing Things, by being so active and reactive rather than letting himself think about it. It’s a sign of exactly how frantic he is that he starts giving away his books and letting humans touch them.

Watch his face when the Archangels show up unexpectedly: that isn’t joy. That’s blind terror. He’s so afraid of doing the wrong thing in Heaven’s eyes, even though he made the active choice to do so because it was the Right thing to do. He’s a Guardian and he will protect, but he is so very afraid of the repercussions, even now. 

At the end of S1, Crowley said “they’re gearing up for the big one” so Aziraphale’s not oblivious. He knows a big one is coming. He knows something worse than the Antichrist will be on its way. And he’s trying so hard to pretend that everything is normal and fine and if he ignores all the looming bad stuff, it won’t happen. If we don’t say anything about it, nothing has to change.

But then the changes come knocking at his door holding a box and the choice is gone. He can keep trying to blinker himself to it, but then there are angels and demons in the bookshop and he’s had to use his halo and everything is falling apart.

So when he realises that he can get himself into a position where he can guarantee those repercussions won’t happen to Crowley? He will absolutely take it. He says himself “I don’t want to go back to Heaven”, but the instant the Metatron offers him a free pass for Crowley, to take Crowley out of both Heaven and Hell’s sightlines, to keep him safe (Another bee inside the hive, if you will), no wonder he grabs it with both hands.

The tragedy is that Crowley thinks that when they saved the world together, that was the end of Heaven’s influence in Aziraphale. When he was cast out the split between him and Heaven was sharp and clean. He doesn’t - he can’t - understand how deeply it has tangled around Aziraphale. It’s built into Aziraphale’s entire being and unravelling it isn’t that simple. Aziraphale’s trauma is a horrible, terrible Gordian knot and Crowley can’t understand that he couldn’t simply cut through it, because that’s just not how Aziraphale works.

#good omens s2 #good omens season 2 #good omens #good omens spoilers #gos2 #go s2

[andhumanslovedstories]

When I was a kid, I had an orange tabby named Taffy, named because I thought she was “sweet and sticky” (ie if you pulled her against your chest, she’d grab you shirt and hang off if you, which is the greatest thing in the world when you’re eight). Anyway due to Life Events, my aunt had to move in with us one year, and she brought her three cats with her, so Taffy was immediately outnumbered by outsiders in her household. Also frankly those cats were absolute fucking bastards. Perfectly normal cats in many ways. But awful sons of bitches, yknow? One of them was mostly a sweetie, but his sisters were like my childhood villains. The risk to my feet in those days. The unprovoked toe attacks around every corner.

Taffy split all her time between unhappily defending her perch on the top of the fridge and roaming around outdoors because it was 2003 and everyone was like “that’s where cats go, why on earth wouldn’t they?” It was clearly such a miserable situation for her that she ended up basically moving in with neighbors two streets over, and we, in probably our only great moment of pet owner responsibility, made it official by given them all of Taffy’s stuff.

And after that I only saw her in passing, by which I mean every time I saw an orange tabby I squinted at it and tried to figure out if that’s the cat I used to put under my shirt and walk around with pretending I was pregnant.

Anyway dad just got an email from her new owners.

Look at this 21+ year old queen!! She is mostly all indoors these days, except for supervised porch time, she’s completely deaf, her bones are made of dust, and by god she outlived all the cats that tormented her.

[kedreeva]

Okay, I haven't wanted to talk much about the peafowl lately, been just kinda dealing with Stan's passing, but! I have news I don't want to keep quiet, so here we go with a little announcement.

I've been helping a friend of mine with a bunch of peafowl genetics work lately, as he's trying to prove out a really neat phenotype of speckled and white peafowl that showed up in his breeding stock, and he just spent tens of thousands of dollars importing two new morphs from Europe: European violet (aka, my dream morph) and Ultramarine (pretty and only otherwise being produced by TWO breeders in the WORLD). When Bill heard about Stan, he asked if I was going to go to a large farm auction that's a few hours from my house. I don't, normally, since it's a few hours from my house and the auctions usually make me kinda sad when it comes to peafowl (they stress out SO MUCH) even though it's cool to see how much they're going for at a wider audience auction.

Then he told me he would be going, and that if I wanted to come down the day before the auction, he'd bring me another male, to replace Stan. I had already made plans to hang onto Bismuth, at least for a few years, and to pick up babies from Indie x Arcana/Eclipse this november, including a male, so I didn't really need another male, and don't have the cash for one anyway. He said no, he meant one of the split EUV males from last year's first-USA breeding. For free. As a thank you for helping him.

To put this into perspective, importing the birds is a ~$10k affair, per bird. I had fully resigned myself to never even SEEING one of these birds in person, much less ever owning one. Even if someone else got them imported, they would remain thousands of dollars for the first few years, and quickly become mixed with other stuff, potentially even be lost by people breeding to purple. He went in on a group import with another breeder and they have both just started selling the full-color birds for over $2k apiece (alongside Ultramarine, which before their import was bred by TWO people in the WORLD, and babies from that are going for almost $7k each, but EUV is more widely spread). Splits (like the one I will be getting) are being let go for $750. This is also the color I have desperately wanted since I first saw them 8-10 years ago (though I believe they've been around slightly longer), but that I had resigned myself to never actually having.

To put it mildly, I'm probably going to burst into tears when I see Bill and this bird. It's going to be super embarrassing. And then I'm going to have to build more pens. And then I'm going to have to get as plain-blue, pure-indian blue hens as I can find, and become one of the most serious curators of plain pure EUV in the US, because I know the other two who have them currently will be outcrossing to other patterns/colors immediately and the people buying them will likely be doing the same, and everyone will be clamoring to make them into high Spaldings ASAP, or won't know not to cross them to purples and wreck the color.

Here's the sire cock, the one imported:

You will notice that this bird is purple in full sun, from the sunny side. That's the main difference between European violet and US purple- a US purple looks blue until you get the right angle on the sun vs the bird vs the camera, and you have to get the bird between you and the sun, so the purple is often in the shadow side- visible to the eye but not the camera. EUV is just purple. Even from the sunny side!!

And the Ultramarine, in case you were wondering about their color:

(pics reposted w/ permission from Bill)

The breeder is Spring Creek Peafowl, and in case anyone is secretly a peafowl breeder or knows other peafowl breeders with too much money that want in on a new color morph, he DOES have UM pairs and EUV hens (and more split males) for sale currently, for less than the only other person in the US that has them. They're still pricey, but cheaper. I WISH I had the extra to have my friend add on an EUV hen, but alas, I will have to wait to make my own in a few years. Even just the opportunity to do so is something I never expected to have!

#peafowl #my pets #longfeather lane #cool cool cool i'm crying about it again #but listen I am OVERCOME with happiness okay #Can't wait to cry in the middle of a VERY public place over a bird #can i gofundme a bird?? is that allowed in their tos

[nipuni]

My dad died yesterday, he was 63

I would like to share a little about him and our story if anyone wants to read, this is not a happy story

My parents divorced when I was three and I went to live with my mom so I saw my dad's life in snapshots, once a week at first and then once a year when he moved abroad and I would spend the summers with him. Every time I would catch up with him he would have a different partner or apartment.

My time with him was always fun, he was laid back, adventurous and open, he would let me do all kinds of crazy stuff while my mom was the strict one. He was a genius to me, he taught me how to program my own games when I was nine, he would make me take computers and appliances apart and reassemble them to teach me how they worked, he made me love science, the outdoors and travelling. He was great at teaching and cooking and driving. He worked on tours for famous musicians as a sound tech, he made 3D films for museums and theme parks when it was all very new, he was a photographer, a programmer, electrician, mechanic, artist and could play many instruments and write poetry!!

The first crack between us was when there was a huge split between my mom's side of the family and his over money and a lot of ugly truths stared coming to light. I realized that when it came to money he was willing to put himself before me and the fights between him and my mom were awful. But in the end once the dust settled we both pretended it never happened.

One weekend I went to visit him and realized his current girlfriend would stick around at last and she had a daughter almost my age!! I now had a little sister and I loved it.

A year later the country fell apart and he fled abroad along with them and even though I missed them I would visit for months at a time every year. I saw him start his life over, he started his own company and I was so proud of him!!

Everything was great for eight years, until one day he told me that my step mom and sister left him and he would sell everything and come back to the country. This was the last time I would ever hear of them, they vanished, I mourned my step sister for years. This was also when his life fell apart.

At 17 adulthood came with a lot of revelations. My mom told me that my dad had been an addict since he was very young, before I was born, my whole life, cocaine and alcohol amongst other things, and everyone around him had been putting up with it and helping him but couldn't take it anymore. He had cheated on her when they had me and had cheated on my step mom too. He would lie to get what he wanted and trusting him was getting increasingly harder.

All of my memories of him were now seen through a different lens. I felt betrayed. I could now tell every time he had been high, and knew where the money he asked of me when to, I was aware of every little lie. I was angry and frustrated at him for the pain he caused my mom and everyone around him. And for squandering the potential I knew he had, for always making the wrong decisions, one mistake after another. And I hated feeling this way the most.

After he came back to the country alone he could never recover, he would relapse, overdose, refuse rehab or any medical help. He would escape psychiatrics facilities and hospitals in the middle of the night, he was a menace!! lmao.

Our relationship was still good despite all this, different but still standing, he had always been my friend even if he wasn't the best at being a dad or partner, I would always scold him and tell him of different job opportunities I came up with for him to try out but now there was this distance between us. I became the parent of the relationship in a way and he didn't like being told what to do. I saw him spiral and I was scared for him.

I've always heard all these stories about addicts finding purpose and fighting for their loved ones, so every time he would jokingly talk to me about how high he was and seemed to enjoy it despite my warnings and pleading it made me feel like I was not enough of a reason to get better, as self centered as it may be I was a teen and I felt powerless to stop him, insignificant. People could get better for their children, but not for me.

I knew this way of thinking was flawed and selfish and he was the one struggling, I knew he was a victim. I spent the last of my teenage years and early twenties trying to fight back this feeling so I could preserve our relationship, we always kept in contact but over time he changed and was no longer the person I knew.

He became a stranger, often times incoherent and delusional, his views changed, he was paranoid, his addiction got worse and worse and now all I could feel was pity and guilt, our once good relationship was now reduced to a few interactions where he would ask me for money, I knew I was possibly funding his self destruction and he was likely lying to me but he also needed to pay for medication and so I couldn't refuse him.

I had my own life now, a husband and plans for the future. When I decided to move abroad a few years ago I knew our hug goodbye could be the last, he was broke and unstable but I thought once I was settled and had a job and a citizenship I could have enough money to get him tickets to visit and show him the life I had made for myself like he had done in my childhood.

But then Covid happened, and he would never agree to make calls. Soon after he was diagnosed with cancer, I would ask about his health and he would say he was fine. He wasn't fine, he was smoking 4 packs a day. He got the cancer removed but refused further treatment, he said he didn't have any purpose left in life and no reasons to keep living, he had a stroke and couldn't feel half his body when he was forcibly hospitalized, his cancer had spread and he hadn't been eating for a long time, he hid all this from me, I first heard it from my aunt in tears over the phone yesterday, he tried to escape the hospital in the night and had to be tied up and sedated, he never woke up.

He died alone, all that is left of his family is me and my aunt and we both live in different countries. There is nobody there to even bury him. I feel like I abandoned him. I've always known I would feel this way when this day came, in a way I've been mourning him for many years and have carried this guilt for even longer.

I had the coolest dad, cocaine took him away. I wish this had a better and uplifting message. I just wanted to get this off my chest. He taught me a lot and made me who I am, and I have a lot of great memories with him. He struggled all of his life with his mental health and despite it all he was still amazing and deserved so much better.

He always said that when he was a ghost he would follow me around, I hope he isl!! so I can live for both of us, I love you dad!! and I'm so sorry 🕯️

#personal #extremely so #tw death #tw drugs #I'm sorry for the depressing post