#story time with an idiot

[pokemontrainerfromgallifrey]

Tokyo Ghoul is just edgy Danny Phamtom

#story time with an idiot

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

i vote that next year instead of reading Dracula we do a Jeeves & Wooster Book Club. those two never got the rabid tumblr shipping fandom they deserved (disqualified for the sheer technicality of being published a century too soon). we must correct this injustice

#jeeves and wooster #i want to watch tumblr go rabid i want to watch ao3 overflow with jeeves/wooster fanfiction #yes obviously the fandom EXISTS but it's a cozy little neighborhood #a handful of talented artists and writers doing their best to keep their charming little village going #but i'm tired of cozy i want this fandom TRENDING #I WANT TO SEE THIS ON MY DASHBOARD PEOPLE #i swear to you if they made a shiny new tv series tumblr would absolutely obsess over these characters. good omens levels of obsession #it's just such a great dynamic! the good-natured overly-trusting bumbling idiot in constant need of rescuing! #the stoic all-knowing genius who quietly masterminds mayhem in order to protect this one moron he's devoted himself to for some reason #jeeves as a morosexual is just such a beautiful interpretation of the original text #wooster as a happy-go-lucky himbo who stumbles his way into a relationship with a protective caring and supremely competent mastermind #the angst and social complexities of a same-sex cross-class relationship in turn-of-the century london! #oh AND half the stories are about jeeves helping wooster get out of engagements/desperately avoid marriage #two men who live together constantly scheming to maintain their bachelorhood. this is quite literally the main plot point #the gay subtext is there! the gay subtext is there and very ripe for picking!!! #this thing is LOCKED AND LOADED we can pounce literally any time

[magicwillow]

I just want y’all to know that one time during lockdown I played a lot of Minecraft because I had nothing better to do and then later I was going to go into my room after a shower so I could go back to being a hermit but it was dark so I just thought “oop, can’t go in there, there’ll be skeletons spawning there and they’ll shoot at me”

And for LIKE FIVE WHOLE SECONDS I didn’t question it and I just turned on the lights and walked out into the living room to wait it out, just thankful I had my pajamas on already so I didn’t have to fight off the shooty skeletons in my dark closet where there might be some creepers too

And then all of a sudden I was like “Wait what the frig skeletons aren’t real” and then just went back into my room

And I think about that a lot. So if ANY OF YOU dare to think that I have any more than three and a half braincells on a really good day, just please remember this and know that you are sorely mistaken

#minecraft #mineblr #shitpost #irl story #don’t judge me please #I’m an idiot #lockdown brain is not good brain #story time

[edwardsdeathcabcd]

remember when bella was playfully like "’something I should know’? what lol, are you not a virgin?" and edward went on to confess that he murdered dozens of men. SO unserious can you imagine how quickly the vibes in that room shifted. I know she felt so fucking awkward for saying that

#like i bet the whole time he was sharing his story with her she was just like WHY DID I HAVE TO MAKE A VIRGIN JOKE. IDIOT. #bella swan #edward cullen #twilight #twilight blog #twilight renaissance #breaking dawn #the twilight saga #tts #bella x edward #breaking dawn part 1 #bella #edward #mine

[veinsfullofstars]

"Still trying to intimidate me? Cute."

(ID: Kirby series fanart of Meta Knight and Galacta Knight based off of a couple dynamics template by @/ReddsMess on Twitter. Original template and source below the cut, as well as a HAL language variant. Top-left panel - high-angle shot of MK lit from above, standing firm and glaring up through his mask, his wings curled out and breaching the panel in places, subtitled "Well well..." Top-right panel - low-angle shot of GK lit from below, looming in the air and leering down through his mask, his wings curled out and his hands spread wide in challenge, both of which breach the panel in places, subtitled "Look who came to see me..." Bottom panel - MK & GK stand next to each other, the latter leaning towards the former and gently caressing the side of his mask with the back of one hand, grinning smugly and wrapping a wing around the knight, subtitled "My Knightmare." MK stands stiffly with his fists clenched at his sides, blushing vividly and glaring away from the warrior. A little flurry of white hearts emanate from GK, while one small one hovers above MK. END ID.)

Started 03/30/24, finished 04/02/24.

---

HAL language variant:

Original by ReddsMess (template link) NOTE: The artist has marked 16-18+ in their bio, so browse at your own risk!

#veins art #veins ships #veins fanart #fanart #kirby series #kirby #meta knight #galacta knight #galacta knight x meta knight #metagala #couple dynamics #couples meme #meme redraw #pose redraw #template redraw #toxic couple or idiots in love? you decide #I'm a sucker for bespoke pet names apparently #real-bat-wings MK my beloved <3 #veins “keeps drawing feathered wings despite how much they hate doing so” fullofstars #also I saw @post-it-notes7's mirror!GK design and now I will never not draw GK in heels #swallow tailed galacta knight #<- (inspired by @starflungwaddledee of course) #*gasp* no sparkles?? #the sacrifices we make for a t m o s p h e r e #hmm I wonder if this is where the Childhood Friends AU would go if MK and DDD never got back together... #(but I get ahead of myself - that's a story for another time) #(me: *slaps self on wrist" veins no! bad goblin! no more AUs! especially not AUs of AUs! stop it!) #veinsfullofstars

[c0ffeeb1ack]

five should've had a cat. i know i know mr. pennycrumb blah blah blah but imagine him finding a stray in the apocalypse and digging it out from the rubble bc he thought it was a human survivor or something, and then he's like goddammit just a cat :/ but the cat starts following him around regardless of how many times he tries to shoo it off and chews on delores's shirt buttons and gets into his canned tuna and is generally super obnoxious in typical cat fashion. but then on one of those endless cold lonely nights the cat creeps up to him where he's sitting slumped against the ruins of his favorite library and he doesn't have the heart to scare it off this time, and it climbs into his lap and starts to purr.

anyway this post was sponsored by the cat person gang

#the umbrella academy #tua #five hargreeves #number five #inspired by both my cats sitting in my lap at the same time like a couple of idiots #also i only read like one issue of the comics so if i just ripped of the mr pennycrumb story i promise it was a happy accident #all i know about that dog is that he exists

[fantasykiri5]

BEHOLD! Smallidarity

#I’m doing my part!! 🫡💪💪💪 #my art #this too is smallidarity #gemcyt #I DID mildly tweak Joel’s design but it’s not because I don’t like it! #it’s just because im honor bound to never ever draw him as a twink 🫡 him being a Pearl is perfect story wise but he is NOT that thin #and the curly hair is a personal preference. I like making his green streak look like a B for beans it’s funny #jimmys I left the same other than hair shape. I just drew it like a usually do which is pretty close to his actual lapis design. #it’s a barely noticeable difference #anyways HERE HE IS!!! THE LOSER!! THE IDIOT!! THE MOST SOPPING WEIRDO OF ALL TIME!! #DIANITE #!!!!! #joel smallishbeans #smallishbeans #jimmy solidarity #jimmy solidarity fanart #smallishbeans fanart #smallidarity #<- FEEDING THE TAG DOING MY PART!! The poor thing is pretty much just being kept going by the shapeshifter AU rn #so I gotta fix that #anyways yeah. here he is. the scorce of my insanity #I think I might have made him TOO cutesy. too Babygirl… no. no he contains Jimmy he can’t be too Babygirl. #he’s just the right amount Babygirl 😌 #also last thing but I colored the words all by hand. I had to use images and they were black so I did the shapes myself and I’m proud of it

[write-it-motherfuckers]

Person A: “The fact that (Person B) always falls for my tricks, use to be entertaining... but now it’s starting to get flat out concerning.”

Person C: “...I think the fact that you still haven’t figured out why they always ‘fall’ for your bullshit, is the real concern here.”

#write-it-motherfuckers #writing prompt #writing prompts #writing #prompt #story prompt #story prompts #story #prompts #my prompt #original #random #imagine #story time motherfucker #dialogue #dialogue prompt #person a and person b #incorrect quotes #incorrect quote #idiots to lovers #one braincell #shenanigans #funny #silly #chaos #chaotic #as always the tags are only ever a suggestion #one sided pining #mutual pining #romance

[sunlightandfreshcherries]

End of this chapter, from A Rolling Stone Gathers No Moss by Qvill

#Space AU #Bdubs #Fanfiction #Please don't follow me expecting hermitcraft content #I don't know if I'll ever make anymore #A Rolling Stone Gathers No Moss #I'm on a kick of wanting to draw scenes from various stories that I'm reading #The author's design for Glare!bdubs looks so huggable #Mines a bit more marvin the martian meets the swamp thing XD #I'm really excited for the next installment #if/when it ever happens #Like #Will bdubs be rescued immediately or will the pirates get him off the ship first? #Will they take away his Shroud?? #The drama potential is so high #I hope at least one of the hermits calls Bdubs an idiot (affectionately) for his stunt #I really really like the descriptions/world building of the Glare #It gives me the same comfy feelings as those fuzzy aliens from a Wrinkle in Time #Hermitcraft #bdubbleo100 #docm77 #ZombieCleo #Keralis

[s3xiel4ss]

My Daddy

Pairing: Sully Family x Sully!Reader, Jake Sully x Daughter!Reader

Requested: no

Summary: After a run in with Avatar’s, your dad says somethings he probably shouldn’t have said and you respond to those things in an unhealthy way

Warnings: Knife mention, talks about slitting throat, 

NOT PROOFREAD

A/N: it was so hard not putting “y’all”. Also tell me why i got butterflies making Jake say “babygirl”/srs.

NOT PROOFREAD, NOT MY GIF CREDS TO WHO MADE IT

You had to be the parent when Neteyam or your parents weren’t there. So when Lo’ak runs off with most the family, you’re the one responsible for anything that happens. So despite you’re protests you have to follow everyone, everyone being: Lo’ak, Kiri, Spider, and of course, Tuk. You had Tuk stay closest with you practically the whole time. 

“Bro,” Spider said, “It’s the place where my dad and your dad fought” while they all ran over there.

“No, don’t go ove-” you were cut off by female and male voices from around. 

They were walking up to the tiny building, they looked like Omaticaya, but they were in full camo. 

“Lo’ak contact dad” you said, “Everyone else, Don’t. Move.” 

Lo’ak nodded then after he finished speaking he told us dad said to get out of there. 

So we started going back the way we came. 

“Mom and Dad are going to kill you when we go back you know that right?” Kiri said while we walked. 

“Kiri, not now” you replied Sternly. 

“Guys come on it’s almost Eclipse!” Tuk exclaimed while going far ahead, too far ahead. 

A high-pitched scream is all that's heard before your senses kick back in, those avatar were holding you all. 

You gave the guy with a buzz cut and camo a dirty stare, you knew he was Quaritch. The way he smirked, remembering how your dad described his looks, he was identical. He was just your race now, or at least looked the part. 

He looked at you than your hands. He said with a horrific smirk, “You’re one of his aren’t ya?” 

He then demanded you all to show your hands while each Avatar was holding all of you tight. When he went to Lo’ak and demanded him, you prayed to Eywa he wouldn’t do anything remotely stupid, but of course he did. He flipped the Avatar off. 

“You’re definitely one of his” he mumbled with an annoying chuckle. 

He goes over to Spider, the one that looked human. They had a conversation but you could not concentrate on it. You instead multi-tasked. 

You prayed to Eywa your parents were here and that everyone would get out of here safely, and you watched your siblings. Their body language, what they were saying or doing. Tuk was terrified and upset, most definitely tired as well. Kiri had her eyes closed whispering something, guessing she was praying to Eywa as well. While Lo’ak was giving the Avatar on him absolute attitude, which if your parents didn’t come in that moment you’re sure he would’ve had his throat slit. 

-------

Once you all got “home”, you were prepared to get yelled at. 

Tuk still terrified, walked with your mother to go to sleep. You and Lo’ak standing there ready for your dad to scream at you two. He decided to let Kiri off the hook, knowing she wouldn't have ‘wanted’ to do this, also knowing about what happened to Spider.

“What were you two thinking?! You know that the old battlegrounds are specifically off limit for a reason! Not only that but you brought Tuk?!” He screeched at the both of you. 

“Sir, I take full responsibility of what happened. It was irresponsible of me to do so.” you calmly responded. 

“Yes! It is most of your fault what happened out there! it is your responsibility to watch your younger siblings when no one else is there! Not only that but allowing them to bring Tuk as well?! As well as your siblings put under a knife under your watch?! I’m disappointed in you Y/n. You’re grounded from flying for three months. Go to bed” He yelled at you. 

You headed to bed, repeating what he said in your mind, during this though you heard less angry muffled yelling at Lo’ak. You fell asleep repeating what he said in your mind over and over. 

------- 

In the morning you didn’t remember everything he said. The only thing repeating was “I’m disappointed in you”. You couldn’t get it out of your head. You know what you did was wrong, but you’re father has never said that to you before. It made you feel horrible. You weren’t hungry in the morning. You didn’t sit at the table, not wanting to face your dad again after the events of last night. 

You were lying in bed when you heard footsteps.

 “Go away, I want to be alone.” you groaned.

“Sister, you did the best you could at protecting them. Kiri told me the full story” He calmy told you. 

You turned to face him, tears welling in your eyes. 

“Neteyam, I put my siblings, Tuk especially, at risk! It is my fault they were held under a blade.” You replied with a shaky voice, “Could you please leave me brother..? I would like to be alone”

And he did just that. A couple hours later, you heard footsteps again.

“Neteyam. I still would like to be left alone.” You said slightly annoyed.

“Will you talk to me, baby girl?” Jake responded. 

Your eyes widened, before turning over to your dad, you wiped your leaked tears from your face. You then face your father. 

He takes that as an invitation to come over, “You wanna talk?” 

Your eyes start to well again. “I’m sorry that I’m such a disappointment to you dad” you say apologetically to him. Your tears starting to escape you. 

“oh baby girl, no your not a disappointment. Yesterday, I had some said things I probably shouldn’t have to you and your brother. I was just scared and angry and took out on you.” He explained, “I could never be disappointed in you baby.”

“I love you daddy” you said while hugging him. 

He hugged you back,  “I love you too sweetheart, now come on let’s get you something to eat”. 

#sully! daughter #im finally feeding y'all #jake sully x daughter!reader #this story got changed so many damn times lmao #jake sully is such a dilf. #neteyam x twin!reader #btw reader is neteyams younger twin. Prolly by like a day but thats why "younger older sibling: #im such an idiot genius #dilf jake sully #didn't even use the queue either

[ceilidho]

How far do you think Johnny could take it with a clueless reader? Like before she starts to think hey wait maybe this isn’t just what boy best friends do?

I mean. They’ve probably fucked a couple times before she confides in a friend that it’s tough dating when you have a guy best friend because that’s basically admitting that she’s currently sleeping with someone and her friend is like. What are you talking about. I have two guy best friends and I don’t sleep with either of them.

#I love idiot reader ❤️ #she’s my silly dumb girl and tbh I see myself in her #wanna hear a funny story since we’re all cozy in the tags? #when I lost my v card my situationship at the time stayed over for the weekend and when he went to leave #he went in for a hug but I thought he was going for a handshake so I shook his hand #like thanks for doing business with you pardner same time next week? #EMBARRASSING. weirdo (derogatory)

[pokemontrainerfromgallifrey]

I was 19 when the pandemic started… I’m turning 23 this year

#pandemic #story time with an idiot #where did the time go

[rearranging-deck-chairs]

obligatory rock murder mention

#i think someone said earlier that they had kind of a lot of mind control stories 'back in those days' #dont remember where #but now im trying to think if we have a lot of them in new who #and if theres something to that in terms of like societal preoccupations #but i guess im just gonna have to...........continue my classic who watch for that and make notes #what do we have in new who? satan comes to mind #midnight but i feel like thats..........a very particular kind it's not like the hypnosis thing you see here #or with the master #or i think sarah jane in the hand of fear? #maybe its JUST because they had the master around who kept hypnotising people tbh like that seems possible #the unquiet dead but thats ghosts more than mind control #i feel like we've got more bodies being taken over than minds in new who? #like the gas mask thing. midnight like i said. 42 with martha and 10? #love and monsters. idiots lantern. the vashta nerada. that guy who got turned into an ood. the masters thing in end of time #11 and the flesh. the god complex perhaps could be mind control? but feels different to me too #but i also havent watched really a lot of classic who so i dont know the vibe of their supposedly frequent mind control #town called mercy. asylum of the daleks. crimson horror. journey to the centre of the tardis? cybermen #it all feels more about the hijacking of the body than the mind or will or whatever #would be intersting to actually look into #if i continue my classic who watch #biggest mind control in new who might have been those mummy monks in pyramid/lie of the land?

[dollypopup]

the more I think about it and rewatch his scenes, the more I cannot help but realize that Colin is coded as a neurodivergent character. At least, I can very clearly see how Luke Newton, a neurodivergent actor, is playing Colin as a neurodivergent character

a special interest in Greek mythology? in traveling? neurodivergent

taking people's word at face value without 'reading between the lines'? neurodivergent

not being able to read Penelope's feelings regardless of how 'obvious' they are? neurodivergent

brain constantly bouncing around from one idea to the next (as in the books)? neurodivergent

not saying the 'right thing' and admitting to having to rehearse important conversations? neurodivergent

all that rejection sensitivity and regret he had well over a year after his engagement blew up? neurodivergent

masking in public? the whole 'charming facade'? neurodivergent

the man straight up STIMS, I mean how often do we see him fidgeting or playing with something? he has an oral fixation like no one's business, always eating, rubbing his mouth, licking his lips

I just can't unsee it

and, one day, i hope our fandom is going to be ready to recognize how many of the things we've unjustly called him an 'idiot' or 'stupid' for is actually just him existing with a neurodivergent brain and how hurtful that can come across to us neurodivergent peeps who identify with him

#colin bridgerton #polin #bridgerton #luke newton himself has ADHD like i'd eat my HAT if he's not playing colin as ND #sure maybe colin doesn't have the words for that in the time period he's in. . .but nd folks have always existed #even when the language for us doesn't #hell. . .even his reaction in S2 when no one is interested in hearing about his travels #TELL ME THAT'S NOT AN ND RESPONSE??? how many of us have infodumped about our special interest #and had no one listen to us? it really does hurt!!! it discourages!!! and we get upset about it just like he did!!! #we stop talking about it *just like he did* #we dismiss it- JUST! LIKE! HE DID!!!! #anyway 'colin bridgerton is an idiot' is my villain origin story #we're leaving that shit in 2023 #colin bridgerton is a chaotic little gremlin is SO much better of a trope #also also cause it's just on my (neurodivergent) brain. #a lot of the polin shippers who have been made to feel unwelcome in polin tend to be colin fans. . .and a lot of us are nd #inch resting #colin is a neurodivergent character #he is my baby boy #and i'm tired of the ableism #and even if he ISN'T explicitly ND- a lot of the behaviors we call him stupid for. . .are relatable to many ND people #and seeing the reaction be a blind 'he's so dumb' is really sad #we're not stupid- our brains just work and process differently #that's all

[joyflameball]

What yougotta understand is that when you're interacting with blogs from a fictional universe, such as the English Willy saga, ya DON'T GIVE THE GAME AWAY. Don't just TELL THEM all the plot. Don't tell them exactly what's happening!! Don't tell them the important names!! Send asks and such but actually think through, how would a normal person respond to all this? How would a normal Tumblrina respond? The answer is YOU PROBABLY WOULD NOT FIND FUCKING EVERYTHING OUT IMMEDIATELY. The answer would probably be memes and clowning on things! If you wanna allude to things that will happen in the plot, ALLUDE to them. If you know that someone's gonna burn to death, say you hope the stress doesn't cause them to burn out. Please, my Tumblrinas, learn the art of subtlety in writing. You are not the main character in fictional universe blogs. It's okay.

#cassie rambles #english willy #this post was prompted by me getting annoyed ppl in the comments of the english willy posts were just straight-up giving everything away #PEOPLE. LEARN THE ART OF ''WAITING'' AND ''SUBTLETY'' AND ''YOU'RE NOT THE MAIN CHARACTER HERE'' #like just straight up saying ''yeah that probably means elizabeth! that's probably a murderer's corpse in there!'' #girl these reveals take TIME #the reason the "lisbef'' thing and the ice cream thing work is because we know the plot to fnaf! we know what he's talking about! #we don't need it to be said explicitly! that's what show dont tell is! #and it sucks the wind out of the sails if you just say ''oh yeah that's a reference to elizabeth afton'' #it's like if the op brought up fires and someone immediately said ''oh fazbear frights is gonna burn down btw'' #like NO. THAT'S NOT WHAT GOOD WRITING IS. THAT'S NOT HOW YOU DO REFERENCES TO THE SOURCE MATERIAL. #the reason saying like ''aw i hope mike doesnt get cold in there i hope he brought smth to stay warm :('' works is because it isn't blatant #i mean if you know hte plot to fnaf 3 it is but if you don't it doesn't break immersion by just telling us the plot #all of this is said lightheartedly #anyway. #LIKE NO YOU IDIOTS!!!! DON'T JUST BRING OUT CIRCUS BABY BLATANTLY!!!!!!!!!!!! #YOU'RE TRYING TO RUSH THE STORY!!!!!!!!!!!!! LET IT BUILD UP AND THE PAYOFF WILL BE BETTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #STOP TRYING TO BE THE MAIN CHARACTER!!!!!!!!!!! YOU ARE A SIDE HARACTER HERE ADN THAT IS OKAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[vinghen-tmblr]

This is nice

Random fluff scene, probably act 3, no spoilers, The Game no more

In a quiet moment after their travels led them to a peaceful glade, Astarion and Elowen found themselves enjoying a rare respite. The air was filled with the sweet scent of blooming flowers, and the gentle rustle of leaves overhead created a soothing melody.

Seated on a soft blanket spread beneath a sprawling tree, Astarion leaned back, propped up on his elbows, and observed the serene surroundings. Elowen, beside him, was engrossed in her leather-bound journal, her quill dancing across the pages as she recorded their recent adventures.

Astarion couldn't help but feel a warmth in his chest as he watched her. The glint of the sunlight catching the strands of her hair, the soft curve of her smile when something amusing caught her eye—it all fascinated him. For someone who had spent centuries detached and cynical, he found a strange sense of joy in these moments.

Setting aside her journal, Elowen looked at him with a playful glint in her eyes. "What's on your mind, Astarion?"

He smirked, a mischievous spark in his crimson eyes. "Just contemplating the mysteries of the universe, my dear."

Elowen chuckled, playfully nudging him. "I highly doubt that. Care to share these mysteries with me?"

Astarion's smirk softened into a genuine smile. "Perhaps the greatest mystery is how I find myself enjoying these peaceful moments with you. I never thought I'd appreciate the simple beauty of a quiet glade."

Elowen's expression shifted to a warm smile. "People change, Astarion. Even vampires, it seems."

He feigned offense, placing a hand over his heart. "Are you implying I was insufferable before?"

She laughed, a melodious sound that seemed to harmonize with the rustling leaves. "Maybe just a little. But you've grown on me."

Astarion pretended to be wounded. "Grown on you? I'll have you know I am an acquired taste, much like fine wine."

She rolled her eyes, but the affectionate glint remained. "Well, lucky for you, I happen to have a taste for the unconventional."

The banter continued, punctuated by shared laughter and stolen glances. As the sun dipped below the horizon, casting a warm glow over the glade,

Astarion found himself embracing the simplicity of the moment, grateful for the company of someone who had become more than just a fellow traveler—a confidant, a friend and someone he deeply cared about.

This...

...this was nice.

#I needed a fluff #Elowen and Astarion having a lovely quiet time #Their main story is so dark I needed something light and cute #i love these idiots #baldurs gate 3 #astarion #astarion ancunin #baldurs gate astarion #baldurs gate three #astarion bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 astarion #astarion x reader #bg3 fanfiction #tav backstory #my tav #baldurs gate tav #bg3 tav #astarion x tav #bg3 fluff