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#steve rodgers song fic
bookgeekgrrl · 2 years
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My media this week (19-25 Jun 2022)
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ᶦⁿ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᵐᵐᵒʳᵗᵃˡ ʷᵒʳᵈˢ ᵒᶠ ᵈᵒᵒʳ 'ᵇᵃᵇʸᵍᶦʳˡ ʸᵒᵘ ᵃʳᵉ ˢᵒ ʰᵒᵗ ᵃⁿᵈ ʸᵒᵘʳ ᶦⁿˢᵗᶦⁿᶜᵗˢ ᵃʳᵉ ˢᵒ ᵇᵃᵈ'
📚 STUFF I READ 📚
😍 Fete For A King (Shivadhverse #1) (Sam Starbuck) - cannot express how much I love this entire universe!!!! This book started as a 'what if there was a hallmark movie where a guy-fieri-like celebrity chef fell for the crown-prince-soon-to-be-king?' - it's sweet and fucking hilarious and very low angst and all the characters are amazing
😍 Infinite Jes (Shivadhverse #2) (Sam Starbuck) - 2nd book in the same universe; a recently retired ex-king at loose ends decides to start a podcast and ends up acquiring more loved ones in the form of a nonbinary producer and their 15-yr-old apprentice/son/disaster magnet
😍 👂‍ The Perfect Crimes of Marian Hayes (The Queer Principles of Kit Webb #2) (Cat Sebastian, author; Joel Leslie, narrator) - fuck, I knew I was going to fucking love Marian Hayes and I wasn't disappointed; give me a prickly, angry romance heroine every day and someone who loves her because their jagged edges fit together
😍 Ain't No Grave (Can Keep My Body Down) (spitandvinegar) - reread, absolute five-star forever fave; always enamoured of the idea that a broken, junkie recovering-from-hydra former asset would find enough of bucky barnes left to adopt two queer homeless kids; all the characterizations in this are incredible
😊 👂‍ Death in the Clouds (Hercule Poirot #13) (Agatha Christie, author; Hugh Fraser, narrator)
😊 Sweet Berries (Cambric Creek #2) (C.M. Nascosta) - mothman monsterfucking romance, very enjoyable
😊 👂‍ Enter the Saint (Simon Templar 'The Saint' #3) (Leslie Charteris, author; John Telfer, narrator) - surprisingly fun action adventure story; what little I knew of The Saint was from the solo hero he would later develop into - I enjoyed this early stuff where he's the leader of a vigilante gang of Bright Young Things
🙂 Dear Mona Lisa… (Claire Davis & Al Stewart) - short novella about a middle-aged synesthete trying to find the right way to come out to his daughter before his impending wedding
💖💖 +311K of shorter fic so shout out to these I really loved 💖💖
Me and the Lavender Moon (emchant3d) - MCU: shrunkyclunks, 10K - another fantastic part of this series about nonbinary kitchen witch bucky & cap!Steve - really love this entire series so much
📺 STUFF I WATCHED 📺
Fire Island - just as amazing and wonderful on the rewatch; nothing but pure serotonin
Legends of Tomorrow - s6, e8-13
🎧 PODCASTS 🎧
99% Invisible #496 - The Rights of Rice and Future of Nature
Twenty Thousand Hertz+ - Breathe
Shedunnit - Bonus: Ask Me Anything Part Two
Strong Songs Bonus Episodes - "Running Up That Hill (A Deal With God)" by Kate Bush
Hit Parade - These Are the Good Times
🎶 MUSIC 🎶
Fire Island Movie Soundtrack playlist
Presenting Janet Jackson
Women Who Owned '99
Gotta Get Away!
Pride Anthems
Summer Ska Celebration
Lazy Summer
Presenting Reba McEntire
Up All Night with Nile Rodgers
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indynerdgirl · 1 year
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Tag 9 People You Want To Know Better
I was tagged by @anniesocsandgeneralstore. Thank you, my dear! 🥰
3 Ships: I literally have an entire armada of ships so it's basically impossible to pick just three. So here are the ones that I've been rereading my favorite fics for lately and that would be Ginny Baker/Mike Lawson (from Pitch AND YES I AM NOW AND FOREVER STILL SALTY ABOUT IT GETTING CANCELED), Darcy Lewis/Bucky Barnes, and Darcy Lewis/Steve Rodgers (look, Darcy is the MCU fandom bicycle, okay? I ship her with just about everyone in the MCU). (I figured it was kind of a given at this point that y'all already know about my brainrot that is my absolute love for Annie's OC, Ronnie Bradshaw & Jake Seresin in all of Annie's fantastic Top Gun: Maverick AUs, so that's why I didn't put them in that list. 😆)
1st Ever Ship: My first ever ship, before I even knew what shipping was, would have to be Laura Ingalls & Almanzo Wilder. I can't tell you how many times pre-teen & early teen me read These Happy Golden Years and wished for an Almanzo of my own. And my crush on Almanzo only grew as I read The First Four Years and later the Rose Wilder series of books about her & her parents (Laura & Almanzo) lives on their Rocky Ridge farm. My first ship once I knew what shipping was, would probably be Ron/Hermonie. I remember wanting Ron & Hermonie to get together in the books pretty quickly, but it really wasn't until HBP that I entertained the thought of Harry/Ginny (I remember being actually pretty bummed for Harry when Cho turned him down for the Yule Ball in GoF).
Last Song: Faeries by Mannheim Steamroller
Last Movie: New In Town - it's one of those movies that I will watch anytime. I can quote along with it and no matter how many times I've seen it, it never fails to make me laugh.
Currently Reading: I'm technically currently listening to the audiobook for The Women With Silver Wings: The Inspiring True Story of the Women Airforce Service Pilots of World War II by Katherin Sharp Landdeck. But it's probably been at least a month if not longer since I've listened to a chapter. I blame the copious amounts of fanfiction that I've been consuming lately. 😆 If we're talking fanfiction, I just started rereading Flyboy by @kryptonitejelly and rereading Sugar and Spice by @wombtotombx , along with my annual reread of @themonkeycabal 's Run Verse.
Currently Watching: The newest season of The Crown. I'm only a few episodes in right now.
Currently Consuming: Water and gum.
Currently Craving: Food? Pizza. Sad honesty? A bone crushing hug. I've realized this year that I am extremely touched starved. It took me a few years to realize this because four years ago I was working at a child care center with infants and toddlers, so I got all of the hugs and cuddles I needed all day long from my babies & kiddos at work. But the rest of my family isn't as touchy-feely as I am so I'm always the one that has to initiate any hugs or getting my younger siblings to cuddle with me on the couch while we watch tv or movies. I have become more vocal this year with my family about needing & wanting hugs, but I'm still that one that has to initiate them and they're never as long or as crushing as I want them to be.
No pressure tags (and feel free to post your own answers if you didn't get tagged, I just picked the first nine people on my dash!): @kryptonitejelly @themonkeycabal @iguana-braces @purple-purple-pink-purple @quo-nunc @i-ate-victor-hugos-brain @iamfitzwilliamdarcy @the-catholic-geek @bartonbones
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loveydelrey444 · 2 years
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Introduction <3
Hi! my name’s Valerie and I’m basically just a 18 year old that writes fanfiction for all these folks: 
Peter Parker (18+)
Barry Allen 
Matt Murdock
Frank Castle 
Sam Winchester 
Dean Winchester 
Castiel
Edward Cullen 
jj Maybank 
Steve Rodgers 
Bucky Barns 
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(Feel free to request any characters you’d like me to write for)
Some things about me:
My big 3 : Leo sun, cancer rising, Scorpio moon (I'm fucking insane)
I'm Black and Hispanic :)
I like Arctic Monkeys, The Neighborhood, Lana del Rey and Stevie Nicks and I get a lot of my fic ideas from their songs so I'll be sure to include the songs I listened to while I was writing in my fics <3. 
I also love astrology and I am currently learning about aspects and the houses so I'll be happy to share some of that on here as well!
Some disclaimers: If you are not 18+ please do not interact. My fics WILL include dark concepts such as, stalking, obsession, kidnapping, somno, age-gaps dub-con, etc on occasion. I will obviously list warnings but if any of those topics are triggering to you I may not be the writer for you and that’s okay :). Also, I do not write smut for the real actors, please do not request real people. Lastly, I'm new to writing on Tumblr but I am not new to writing fanfiction.
 I’ve hardly ever seen any representation for woc or poc in general so I will not be specifying any skin color in ANY of my fics, as a poc myself I'd like for my work to be able to be suitable for anyone of any skin color or body type (also will not be specified). I do also write for wlw (I'm pansexual). 
RULES FOR MY BLOG;
-Absolutely NO hate speech towards anyone, you will be blocked and I will chew your ass out :).
-Everyone will be treated with respect but please keep in mind respect goes both ways. 
-if you do not have your age listed somewhere I will block you. Please respect my boundaries.
That’s it! I hope to entertain you all the best I can, reblogs, and comments are very helpful and appreciated :). 
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shunshuntaiga · 1 year
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Tagged by @evilphrog!
3 ships
1. Aureliano Adami x Alberto "Spadino" Anacleti
2. Mat Cauthon x Thom Merrilin (my first fic I ever wrote)
3. Steve Harrington x Eddie Munson (new, but I love them)
First ever ship
Steve Rodgers and Bucky Barnes, probably. It's the first one I actively remember searching stuff out for. Maybe Dean/Cas? But I don't think I knew what shipping was at the time, so ima go with Stucky.
Last song
*sigh*..... Bodies by Drowning Pool. I'm sick and was feeling nostalgic, and that's a song I remember jamming to with my dad.
Currently reading
Bullet Train by Kotaro Isaka. Surprisingly good, I'm really enjoying it. Just finished Feet of Clay by Terry Pratchett, which was also very good.
Last Movie
Cobalt Blue. It was alright, not really my taste but I want to expand my viewing horizons to more than just silly little action movies. Before that, Brokeback Mountain, which was amazing and broke my heart.
Currently Consuming
Nothing, but I did just eat some waffles 👍
Currently Watching
Also nothing. I just finished Stranger Things which was fantastic, and I haven't decided what I want to try next. I've been going through somewhat of a list of shows and movies I haven't watched for various reasons and that was the next one on it. So I'm not sure what I want to try. I should finish Narcos since I started it, but I don't really think I'm in the mood for a lot of subtitles right now.
Currently Craving
A soft pretzel, I think. With cinnamon sugar. If not food, sleep. Or time. I don't have enough time to do things anymore, and that makes me sad.
Per usual if you see this and you want to do it, consider yourself tagged! I always feel a bit weird about tagging people not sure if it'll inconvenience you
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imaginestuffs · 3 years
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Who could stay?- Steve Rogers x Reader
word count:1653
warnings: angst, I think that's it honestly! if not, then please let me know so I can fix it.
summary: This fic is based on the song The Archer by Taylor Swift.
this is my first fic for Steve so please be kind! any feedback would be great! love you all!
Masterlist
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(lyrics are in bold)
“I’ve been the archer, I’ve been the prey. Who could ever leave me darling, but who could stay?”
You walked through the compound with your head hung low, you had been having trouble with yourself lately. You knew you weren’t a saint, but you also knew that neither was everyone else. People always told you that no one in their right mind would leave you, but you thought no one in their right mind would stay.
You had done so many things in your life that you were nowhere near proud of, it was hard to look back at your life. It was either you were hurt or you had hurt someone else whether it be physically on missions or just emotionally that you could never heal or fix.
You walked down the hall towards your room with a cup of tea in your hands when you were met with someone stopping just in front of you, and you luckily stopped in time before hitting them. You knew those shoes anywhere, in front of you stood one of your closest friends Steve Rogers. America’s icon. The war hero. The man out of time. More importantly, the man you fell in love with.
He would never know that, but every time you were around him your heart would beat faster than it ever had and each time you were scared he could hear it against your ribs.
You shuffled your feet awkwardly before getting the courage to look at him.
You took a deep breath and lifted your head just to see those beautiful blue eyes filled with concern as he looked down at you.
You never walked around with your head down and lately you'd been doing that more often than not.
"(Y/n)... what's going on?" Steve asked gently. You let your grip tighten around the warm mug and avoided his gaze. "What do you mean? Why would you think something is going on?" You return his question with your own.
"You're not being yourself. I've known you for years better than anyone else. I can see when something is wrong." He said.
You tried to straighten yourself up, putting your shoulders back and lifting your head up. You did these actions despite the struggle you had.
Clearing your throat you looked at him. "Steve, I'm just fine." Your breath was shakier than you would've liked.
He reached out a hand and placed it gently on your shoulder, adding to the already crushing weight. You continued to look at him, into those eyes full of compassion and something you couldn't quite decipher.
You stood there in silence for a few seconds. Your heart was getting heavier the longer you looked into those eyes.
Your shoulders succumb to the weight and your head hung once again, your actions causing the mug to fall and shatter on the floor. Steve immediately acted on your movements and reached out to grab you. He quickly maneuvered you around the glass on the floor and away from it.
You weren't crying, you were just so tired. Too tired.
Your heart was like a stone sinking further and further down. All you could think about was how love was an impossible feat for you. Sure people think that no one would ever leave you, but you knew if they knew you and your past they would run like a scared child.
You knew that Steve could never love you for what you've done and because of all the internal struggles you dealt with. Who could stay?
You barely even noticed Steve picking you up and settling you in his arms. "Sweetheart?" Steve tried to speak to you. Your eyes just closed as you blocked him out not wanting to cry.
He looked down at you as he walked towards your room, not caring about the mess that was left behind. You needed him now and he wasn't going to let you go.
You bit your tongue to hold back cries that willed to escape. You had sworn not to cry in front of Steve, you had already done enough damage today as it is. You felt Steve hold you tighter and sighed knowing that if you fought it would be no use.
You soon heard a door creaking open and you entered your room. Steve closed it behind you, making his way to set you on your bed. When he gently let you down you turned over on your side and curled up. He quickly flicked on the small lamp on your bedside table. He sat next to you and rested a hand on your arm.
"Please talk to me." You heard the desperation in his voice as he spoke. "You're worrying me." He spoke again.
Your eyes slowly opened and his hurt voice tugged on your heart. You opened your mouth slightly to speak. Not knowing what to say you just let yourself go.
"You all say that no one in their right mind could ever leave me…" your voice was soft. Steve listened intently. "Of course… we'd never lie to you." He said but you spoke up quickly.
"It's not true Steve. I mean, who in all their sanity could ever stay with me. I'm a fucking mess inside and out. I have issues no one should have to endure while being with me. If they saw me. Really saw me then they would run for their lives. Who could ever stay Steven? Who?" You ended up letting yourself cry. Your voice broke and wavered. "Because I- because I know damn well-" you cried "that no one should ever have to." You sobbed again, hiding your face into the tear-stained pillow.
Steve's heart broke at your words never knowing how horribly you felt about yourself. Seeing the woman he loved so broken, feeling like love would never be an option for her. He wanted to love you, he loved you. He needed to show you that.
He carefully laid down beside you gently tugging your body close to his. Your back was to his chest as you cried. “Steve, I can’t do it anymore, I just can’t. I’ve never had one ‘I love you’ that has ever stayed. As I said, they shouldn’t have to.” your voice shook rapidly. He just held you tighter.
“You deserve the world (y/n). You’re going to find someone who will stay, maybe they’re closer than you think. “ he said into your hair. You squeezed your eyes shut. “What does that mean Steve?” you ask quietly. He took a deep breath and turned you around to face him. Your glassy eyes looked up at him through tear-soaked lashes. Steve lifted his hand and brushed your hair away from your face with a tiny nervous smile. “It means that I love you,” he said softly. Your eyes went wide at his words not fully being able to comprehend what he said. “Don’t play with me like that. Don’t you dare do that to me.” your jaw clenched as you practically growled at him. Tears came to stain your cheeks once more as you stared at him.
“I’m not playing with you. You know I’d never do that to you. I really do love you. I love you even if you can’t believe that.” he said to you wiping a tear from your cheek. You felt paralyzed at that moment, not knowing truly what you were feeling. Whether it was fear, joy, excitement, dread. You didn’t know. All you knew is that you felt too much.
Before you could even stop yourself you began to speak.
“I don’t know what’s going on. I’m confused and scared, but I’m also so happy. I’ve loved you for so long but I don’t even know if I could ever love you right. I don’t know what to do Steve. I don’t want you to leave, I don’t want to lose you but I’m scared that if you really had to see me every day you would never want to stay. I want you but I don’t want to be so myself that it will drive you away. I’m so scared. “ you cried to him, grabbing the hand that was resting between you both. He leaned forward and pressed a kiss to your forehead.
“You could never drive me away. I want to see you be yourself every day. I want to be there to see you. I don’t want you to hide from me, you wouldn’t want me to hide my past mistakes and problems from you right?” he asked gently. You shook your head. “No, of course not. I want you and that means everything. I want all of you not just what I see right now.” you told him squeezing his hand. “You see sweetheart, that’s exactly what I want. I want all of you. Your past, your present, your future, those tearful nights, grumpy mornings, and sunny days. I want everything, and I want everything with you.” he said while looking into your eyes. You looked at him through blurred vision and let out a small cry.
“I’m just so scared I won’t be able to love you right. What if I mess up?” you question helplessly. “I know you can do it, I’m going to be here for you through it all. We’ll learn to love together,” he whispered to you in reassurance. You looked up at him and he leaned down gently to place a small kiss on your lips. It just a brush of his lips against yours but it was enough.
“Just help me hold onto you, please,” you said while holding his hand close to your heart.
“I’ll always stay.” he kissed your forehead one more time before pulling you into his chest and holding you there for as long as you both needed.
“Who could ever leave me, darling? But who could stay? You could stay.”
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iliketowrite1996 · 3 years
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Happiness
very, very loosely based off of “Happiness” by Little Mix
With a final swipe of your eyeshadow brush, you finish your look for the night- a sultry smokey eye that completes your look for the night. The black dress that Nat gave you for the evening fits perfectly, helping boost your confidence.
‘’You look stunning,’’ she smiles from her spot on her bed, where her legs are crossed as she waits for you to finish getting dressed.
‘’Thanks. I still don’t see why I have to do this. Why couldn’t it be you? Or Wanda? Or even Carol?’’
‘’Because you’re the best for the job. Listen, it’s not like you haven’t worked with Steve before. And you’re good at these types of missions. So suck it up, buttercup.’’
You roll your eyes before turning to face her, ‘’You’re really annoying when you get like this.’’
Natasha shrugs, a deadpan expression on her face before a gentle smile replaces it, ‘’You’ll be okay. But you’d better get going. The dinner starts in an hour.’’
Grabbing your clutch, and doing your best to resolve to not let feelings get in the way of you doing your job tonight.
You have been on the Avengers team for going on three years now. Having been recruited by Natasha Romanoff yourself, you gained an excellent mentor and someone who pushes you to be better than you were the previous day.
Steve is waiting for you in the foyer, a hand in his pocket as he checks his wrist watch once more before finally looking to see you.
He looks dapper as ever, dressed in a suit that fits him just as wella s your dress fits you. He cleans up well, and he knows it. As his eyes silently, quickly, look you over once before hef finally speaks, ‘’Nice of you to join me.’’
‘’Nice of you to give me less than a day’s notice,’’ you quip, and he bites the inside of his jaw- a sure sign that you are starting to frustrate him.
‘’Listen- let’s not do this tonight. It’s going to snow. We both know that we work better together when we just focus on the mission.’’
‘’Don’t worry, Steve. I can be professional. Let’s go.’’
The two of you make your way to the banquet hall that the dinner is being held at. Your arm is looped through his as the two of you play the part of the happy, wealthy couple here to buy a painting worth over 5 million dollars. In reality, you’re here to secure the stone painting, and turn the well-known thieves over to officials.
‘’He’s been known to work with Ulysses S. Klaue- he is dangerous and can not be trusted. Stick close to me and remember the palm,’’ Steve whispers once more, pretending to brush hair out of your face, ‘’We’re supposed to be a couple. Look at me adoringly.’’
It’s meant to be a joke- a phrase to ease a bit of the tension that is so obviously bubbling up and threatening to spill over between the two of you. It’s a sticky situation. It is a bit off putting, given your history with him, that he chose you and not anyone else for this mission.
You and Steve dated for a year. It started with an early morning training session, and ended with a fight that had the whole Avengers’ compound in silence for 30 minutes in its wake.. Doors were slammed, and words that should have never been spoken spilled from both of your mos like hot lava, destroying all that was in its path. Regrets were born that night,mistakes were made, a relationship was destroyed.
To be here with Steve Rogers tonight, then, pretending to be a couple is bittersweet. It shows that although he is confident in your ability to hold your own and have his back as he has yours, things are no longer the same. The love that you two once shared has evaporated into thin air, leaving nothing but a trail of memories in its path.
He pulls your chair for you, and you take a seat, deciding to instead focus on the mission at hand, forgetting anything else for the evening.
‘’That’s him over there,’’ Steve says with a smile, pretending to whisper in your ear as you fiffle to make it look more real, ‘’Red shirt, grey suit.’’
‘’Is she with him,’’ you turn to look at Steve, a dazzling grin playing only your face as you pretend to flirt with him,’’The blonde practically glued to his side.’’
Steve pretends to glance at the artwork, really examining the dynamic between the blonde woman in the red dress and your art culprit. His eyes seem to scan the room for anyone else that could be apart of this attempted heist, before he returns his attention to you, wrapping an arm around your shoulder.
‘’I believe so. Saw her checking out the art before the auction. We need to make sure to have the highest bid tonight. Tony is on standby as are Nat, Rhodey and Hawkeye. Keep the bid going. We’ve got to beat their highest bidder.’’
Dinner is non-eventful, and it is now time for the auction. You’re clutching the paddle, looking around to see who else seems to be interested in the piece of art.
‘’Look to my right,’’ you whisper to Steve, ‘’The woman in the blue dress with the matching hat. She’s been eyeing this painting too.’’
‘’Then you just have to outbid her. No one here knows how much this painting is actually worth,’’ Steve reminds you, pretending to stretch before looking at you,’’Just don’t let them sell it to anyone else. You and I both know we’re not actually going to pay for it.’’
‘’Steve, listen. There are a lot of people here, and I don’t want this to turn ugly with them here. We’re here to take down this art culprit. How-’’
‘’Hey, relax. We’ve done this before. Keep your eyes on the mission, and don’t worry that things will go wrong. You’re brilliant. We’ve got this.’’
His words reassure you,and you loosen your grip on the paddle, relaxing back into your chair.
Steve’s right.You are brilliant, you’ve got this. What could go wrong?
Of course, it does. Somehow, the culprit’s accomplice figured out what was going on. Because of this, you and Steve ended up having to fight the two of them before the officials came, but the painting has been recovered and returned to its rightful owner. Now the two of you are headed back to the commode, ready to debrief the team in the morning.
‘’You handled that very well,’’ Steve compliments you, ‘’Who taught you that spinning kick move? Very impressive.’’
‘’You know Natasha did,’’ you chuckle, reaching up to rup your sore arms,’’His accomplice was a pretty skilled fighter. If she wasn’t evil, she’d probably make a good Avenger.’’
‘’Hey, anyone can be reformed. Look at Wanda and Pietro.’’
‘’That’s true,’’ you agree, stopping t pull your heels off as you reach the back entrance of the compound, ‘’Now, his worse crime is flirting badly with me.’’
‘’That is a crime- especially for those of us that have to witness it second hand.’’
‘’He’s a bit of a flirt, but he’s cute,’’ you shrug absentmindedly, unaware of the way Steve’s stomach seems to dip at the thought of you and Pietro together.
‘’Don’t you think you need more than that,’’ Steve suggests, and it’s your stomach's turn to do the flipping. He’s so close to you now, following you onto the elevator as the two of you make your ways to your respective rooms for the evening.
Steve’scologne is nearly as intoxicating as his presence is, and it takes all of the strength that you can muster not to lean back into him as you would have done not even six months ago before you broke up.
The elevator door closes, and you two stand as far apart as you can in the tiny amount of space provided to you by the elevator. You are aware of Stve;s hands in his pockets, his body turned towards the door, his eyes on you as you stand facing one mirrored wall of the elevator.
‘’You haven’t answered my question yet.’’
‘’I don’t see how that's any of your business, Steve,’’ you avoid making eye contact with his reflection, ‘’We’re no longer together. We are partners, occasionally. Nothing more think less.’’
‘’Partners care about each other, right? I would think that us having dated gives me even more reason to care about you,’’ Steve reasons, now facing you completely, hands still in his pockets.
This feels like the longest elevator ride ever, and you are so sure that Strve can hear the way you swallow, trying to push back any feelings that you’ve been feeling trying to come to the surface after the events of the mission.
‘’Steve, don’t . Don’t do that,’’ you sigh, ‘’Not right now.’
‘’Please. At least talk to me. Everything happened so fast that night. It’s like… it’s like you know why we broke up, and like everyone else does, and I am the only one who’s lost in the dark here.’’
‘’You know what, Steven?,’’ you whip around to face your ex, ‘’You always do this. You are always. Doing. This. You are so desperate to relive the past and to make things be the way that he used to be, but guess what, Steve? We’re done. We are over,a dn there is no going back.’’
He’s even closer now, hands hesitating before he holds your face in his hands.
You’d be lying if you said that this wasn’t something you missed- the feeling of being so close to Serve, dazzling blue eyes trained on you if only for a moment.
But,oh, how you wish the context of this situation had been so dramatically different.
‘’I did what I had to do, Steve. I made the decision for both of us-’’
‘’I still love you, and I always will. And I am begging you to please let me know-’’
‘’I can’t handle being Captain America's girlfriend.’’
The silence that radiates between the two of you is so thick that it’s almost tangible. Steve releases your face from his grasp, stepping back to take in what’s just been spoken.
‘’You can’t what?’’
‘’Handle being Captain America’s girlfriend. Being THE star spangled man with a plant's girlfriend. I don’t think we were ever happy together, Steve. I was trying to live up to your image and get out of your shadow, and you were always looking for the next person beinin need. That’s what led up to that fight. Neither one of us wanted this anymore, it was just something that was becoming routine. So I ended it. For both of us, For good.’’
‘’So you just made the decision for both of us, huh,’’ he scoffs , ‘’Just decided that were bever meant to be together because you can’t handle being my girl?’’
‘’Oh, please. I had no idea who I was, and I am still learning. This has nothing to do with you, Steve. Don't try to spin it so that it seems that way. DOn’t take it personally.’’
Steve’s shoulders relax a bit, and he nods, a sort of melancholy expression etched into his features.
‘’I guess you’re right. So...if that’s the case… why were we together?’’
It takes you a minute to notice that the elevator door is open. So you’re left with two choices- leave the elevator and successfully avoid this conversation for at least another light, or finally rip off the bandaid and explain to Steve Rogers, America’s most eligible bachelor, the first Avenger, why you couldn’t handle the strain of being his girlfriend.
You reach over and close the door, electing to go all the way back to the first floor to give the two of you some privacy.
Well, as much privacy as you can get in the Avengers compound.
‘’Because it makes sense, doesn’t it? We work together, we are good together in that sense. So it would have only made sense that this partnership transferred over into our romantic life...but it didn’t. We never really messed well. And though I cared for you, I could see myself starting to lose pieces of myself.I was no longer training to be better, no longer taking on missions to help others. It was to prove that I could be as great as you. AndI don’t like that feeling.’’
He seems to be taking that in, sighing before running a hand over his face, ‘’Then what was that? Was it real?’’
‘’It was what it was, Steve. I’m not sure that it was real for me. Was it real for you?’’
As long as Steve Rogers can remember, he’s wanted the simple, ideal,stereotype life- a wife and some kids, annice backyard and dog or two.He had thought for years that the guy who wanted all of that was left behind in the ice, but upon meeting you, he considered that maybe he’d changed his mind yet again.
He presses the button to take you back to the top floor, and you can tell that he is thinking.
It’s a hard pill to swallow, you’ll admit- knowing that you weren’t right for eachother. It stylish a bit of a struggle to think it to yourself, despite your gradual acceptance of the matter.
‘’You still have this ideal image in your mind,’’ you go on, ‘’And I’m not Peggy, Steve. You might have let her go,but not the life you were planning on having with her. I was a sort of stand in-someone you thought you should want, because you do still want your ideal life. You Are using me to fill up your happiness and replace your loneliness. That’s not fair, Steve.’’
‘’Neither is you just using me as an excuse to be better,’’ he reminds you, and you reluctantly nod in agreement.
‘’So there was some truth spoken to those words that night, I guess. We couldn’t go on like that anymore, Steve. It wasn’t fair to anyone. Not yo you, not to myself, not to our futures.’’
The elevator dings, and you step off, Steven Grant Rogers right behind you as you do.
‘’I still love you. Isay that not to change your mind, but because it is the truth. No hard feelings, right?’’
‘’No hard feelings, Steve. But, listen- I’m pretty tired. I’d better be going to bed now, don’t you think? After all, Nat’s got em scheduled for a 7 AM sparring session.’’
‘’Yeah, I’d better get Bucky to train a bit more, too. Good night.’’
‘’Good night, Steve.’’
With a small grin, he nods, turning on his heel to go to his side of the floor. You make your way to yours, ready to shed this black dress and go to bed for the evening.
It isn’t until you're in bed staring at the ceiling that you finally begin to let your mind roam. The what-if’s and could-have surrounding you and Steve seem to have been swept up for the time being,you're glad to put these out of your head.
So this is it- closure- and it feels pretty good. You’re no longer depended on Steve for happiness, and neither is he depended on you.
So the two of you will work together as partners and friends-nothing more and nothing less.
You’d be lying, though, if you said that the thought of Steve didn’t end a tiny smirk to your face.
Little do you know that Steve’s on the other side of the compound thinking of you.
So even if things aren’t the way that you wish they could be, they’re good.
You’re finding yourself, and you’re not willing to lose yourself again.
Disclaimer- I own no marvel characters or anything affiliated with marvel or the song by little mix
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memescomicswriting · 5 years
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Devil’s Backbone
Pairing: Steve x Reader SongFic!
Fandom: Marvel
Based off: “Devil’s Backbone” by the Civil Wars
Summary: In a world of big players, you are a lower level S.H.I.E.L.D agent that happens to catch Captain America’s eye. And Oh Lord, what would that man get you to do.
Warnings: None. ‘Lil angsty
Oh Lord, Steve Grant Rogers. A man raised on the edge of Devil's Backbone. The skinny, sick kid from Brooklyn. The man who gave his all in service to his country. The man who told the world's government to take a long walk off a short pier. A man on the run.
And then there was you. Little Y/N, who had taken up the call to action and joined S.H.I.E.L.D despite all the odds. You followed the rules to an incessant end. Being a woman in a man's world meant adding twice the effort to receive the same recognition. It was no different in the lower levels of S.H.I.E.L.D. So you trained, followed the rules, and excelled in ranks until you were just high enough up the chain to brush past the Captain America in hallways; on clean-up duty from his missions; and maybe once or twice as a squadron of armed back up.
You found him between a hangman's knot and three mouths to feed on a Hail Mary pass. He wasn't over the ice, but no longer the man with eyes draped in longing for something, or someone, he would never get. But he wasn't whole yet. He was exploring this new world and the new him. And then there was you. Little Y/N. Smaller than him in stature, but so strong, and bright, and radiating something Steve so desperately needed- joy. You worked hard and focused on the happiness, no matter how little, rather than the pain. Oh, and did you fall for him. Despite Hydra, and S.H.E.I.L.D's collapse, and the whole chaotic universe- fate wanted you together. Following the fall, Cap went back to the Avengers. Neither of you initiated anything before the collapse. Hell, you hadn't gotten over the fact he knew your name, or that he regularly talked to you. You never mustered the courage to make your feelings known. And then there was you. Not so little, not so honest, not so compliant Y/N. You grew up quick in those years in between. You couldn't do what you set out to in the aftermath of the collapse. You turned in every direction you could trying to find a place to fit; to keep yourself the way you were, good. Then Maria Hill came along, Furry, covert ops, an off the book effort to do good without someone looking over your shoulder demanding paperwork. You fell down the rabbit hole of espionage, but kept your grace. And then there was Steve. Oh Lord, Steven Grant Rogers. For a man so honorable, he could bring you down to sin. Without a right or a wrong to choose, Steve chose his autonomy and his beliefs. To the public, he was a sinner and a man on the run. Then came Maria Hill and Furry. Your solo mission became a menagerie of people: Steve, Sam, Wanda, Natasha, Bucky. No one stayed long, except Steve. Steve always stayed. Always on the run from one mission to another. That was when you fell- not for the soldier, not for the Captain, and not the 'golden boy.' You well for the sinner and the man on the run. You fell for the kid from Brooklyn and became an unbreakable man. He did what he had to do. And every night you prayed: "Oh Lord, Or Lord, what have I done?!" But there was no right or wrong anymore. The Captain was gone. There was just Steve- the good and the bad, and all that you got wrapped up into one devastating man. And every mission, every close call, every time the burden became crushing you prayed: "Oh Lord, Oh Lord, don't take this sinner from me!" His mere presence fueled your existence. That man made you exquisitely whole. So you'd take the burden and you'd take the blame. You'd shoulder the load if need be, and swallow any shame. That changed you. Steve saw that. A new darkness overtook him and the world was no longer black and white, but a grey in between. Content at the time, you tumbled after him. You still found the happiness in the pain and made the joy, but you were no longer the innocent warrior. You hadn't forsaken your grace, but you had fallen. You were something in between. Because it didn't matter if Steve was guilty or not. He was your sinner and your man on the run. One day, laying on the old sheets of another dingy hotel, Steve looked up from the nook of your shoulder and neck. He gave you those pleading eyes that turned you into putty in his arms. You stopped stroking the mane he had grown and he gave a grunt. Suking his bottom lip between his teeth he continued that stare. He could burn your soul with that smoldering look. And Oh Lord, would you sin for that man. "Y/N." It was your name, quiet but firm, and almost desperate. "I'm good and I'm bad, but you're all that I got. Without a wrong or a right, I've done what I've done. I'm out of Hail Mary passes, guilty or not. You've taken my burdens and the blame. I'm a sinner and a man on the run, but I couldn't survive you be'n taken from me."
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WILL'S ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY EVENT
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WILL'S ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY EVENT
Tumblr keeps screwing up this post, so I'm going to keep this brief, but thank you to everyone who has ever followed my blog, made this page what it is, enjoyed my fics, wanted more, encouraged me, become a friend, understood when I need breaks and been there for me when I'm going through rough times. Thanks for reading my 57 fics, for dealing with my indecisive moments, my constant changing of fandoms and times where I don't talk to anyone. I love you all, and I love this blog and how it's kept me sane.
Underneath the cut, I've created two little events to celebrate this milestone. You can participate if you wish, absolutely no pressure! One's a writing challenge for my fellow fic writers, and one's a request activity. Take a peek if you want, I would love you too.
Will x
WRITING CHALLENGE
The rules:
Choose up to 1 trope and or song prompt, as well as 2 action and or dialogue prompts from the lists below! They will be listed below the REQUESTS section!
Select your character/ ship that you'll be writing for! Can be from Stranger Things, Criminal Minds, Marvel, and or Criminal Minds. Trust me, there are no limits as to who you could pick, write for whoever you want! Just make sure it's ya know, legal!
Submit an ask or DM with the ship/ character you've selected, the relationship (platonic, romantic, family) and the prompts you would like, and I'll be sure to put you on this post! PLEASE DO SO OFF ANON, so I know who to assign to what prompt!
There can be up to 3 writers per prompt, and 3 writers per trope!
There is NO DEADLINE, I do ask though that you use the #willsannievent
Please tag with the appropriate warnings, and make sure that you're tagging NSFW pieces with the right tag!
And most importantly, have fun!
SEND A REQUEST TO WILL
This is your chance to send any request you want to me, within reason of course! Please make sure if you're wanting something NSFW you're over 18 and preferably off anon, so I can confirm age! You can choose from the prompts below, choose up to 1 trope and or song prompt, as well as 2 action and or dialogue prompts from the lists below! Please be mindful that these will take some time to get through, and I'm about to enter essay season. Please be kind, please be patient, and please recognise that I have the right to reject requests BUT you'll always have the chance to submit a new one! And please, have fun! I want to write something you'll enjoy, so truly pick prompts you love. DEADLINE FOR REQUESTS IS THE 31ST OF MAY! You can request for: CRIMINAL MINDS: Spencer Reid, Aaron Hotchner, Derek Morgan, Emily Prentiss, Hotchreid, Moreid, Jemily THE X-FILES: Fox Mulder x Dana Scully MARVEL: Bucky Barnes, Sam Wilson, Steve Rodgers, Natasha Romanoff, Wanda Maximoff STRANGER THINGS: Jonathan Byers, Steve Harrington, Stonathan, Stoncy
THE PROMPTS
Tropes:
Share the bed
Enemies to Lovers
Mutual Pining
Bookstore AU
Rescue Mission
Can't sleep
Long Lost Friend
Caring for the injured
Secret Relationship
Truth or Dare
Action Prompts:
Lazy morning/evening kisses
Sudden needy passionate kisses
Stealing clothes
Making the other food or drinks
Tucking someone into bed
Protecting them from danger
Bandaging wounds
Holding hands
Reading to each other
Napping together
Dialogue Prompts:
"Everything is better since I met you"
"I never liked vacations until I met you"
"Please don't leave me"
"I missed you"
"How can I trust you?"
"And I thought you were just a pretty face"
"I'm not leaving without you"
"You know, I kinda like it when you call me -pet name-"
"I can't wait any longer, I need you to be mine"
"God damn it, you're beautiful and sexy and...and you make me go insane"
Song Prompts:
Share Your Address- Ben Platt
Another Love- Tom Odell
Let My Love Open The Door- Pete Townshend
Nothing Matters When We're Dancing- The Magnetic Fields
Scar- Missy Higgins
It Gets Better- Rex Orange County
Golden- Harry Styles
Only Angel- Harry Styles
Paper Rings- Taylor Swift
Love Story- Taylor Swift
PLEASE BE SURE TO READ THE RULES AND SEND YOUR REQUESTS, WRITING CHALLENGE ENTRY TO MY ASK BOX OR DMS! TAGGING SOME MUTUALS AND THOSE WHO MIGHT LIKE TO CELEBRATE WITH ME! @spacedikut @reidemandweep @reidingmelodies @reidsconverse @mercy-burning @samuel-de-champagne-problems @spencereidsupremacy @morceid @morcias @anaagraceeberr @katytheinspiredworkaholic @sadspencer @honeyharreh @ellesgreenaway @voidsfilm @scandinavian-punk @luvofyourlifeliv @lumoshotch @ssahotchswifemain @wheelsup @drreidsboyband @reidgifs @homoose @bvttercupbby @masterwords @dralexreid @laurnrnlds @reidyoulikeabook @spencersawkward @spencers-renaissance @rigatonireid @alltooreid @b-a-utiful @makaylajadewrites @pusheen1802 @reidsnose @altsvu @writing-in-april @tobias-hankel @hotchsbabygirl @lunalovecroft @anxiousblanketqueen
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⭐ for director's cut ask
Heyy! Sorry I saw on this one for a while, hope that's okay!
From this post :)
-
So I'm about 11,000 words into a Marvel crossover fic. It's a reader insert that spans like from 1940's CA:FA onwards and it'll include the MCU ensemble, X-Men, Dr Strange, Venom, Deadpool and probably more by the time it's done. I'm thinking it'll be canon divergent, taking creative liberties before diving off book after 2012 - I don't have the ending figured out yet though.
Each chapter is really small, it's kind of by design. The main character lives a long ass time so it's more a highlights reel of events and memories than minute by minute account.
Her story could also be divided up into acts really. The first act is called 'We'll Meet Again' - from the song by Vera Lynn. It's set in the time before, during and after CA:TFA and crosses over with Wolverine - that part is almost complete.
Then the next act would be from Maria Stark falling pregnant up to the events of the first Iron Man movie and will cross over with Pre-CA:WS, Agent Carter, and college! Tony Stark. Then the next and so on. I'm thinking there are at least 3 acts so far outlined. I'm undecided if it'll be Thanos compliant or not, because I've got some ideas about it but those movies made me cry a lot.
I really want to start posting it, but I'm terrified that I will never finish it if I do. I've already posted a couple of snippets from it though, they aren't huge plot spoilers and kind of work as a stand alone thing (I think anyway). If you wanna read them, you can find them here: x - or at my AO3 account.
Since it's done, I'll post the first 700 ish words of 'We'll Meet Again' - see what you think! It's mostly under the cut as this post is long enough. Feel free to ignore also though.
---------------
In hindsight, Grace had known getting attached was a bad idea. She found herself doing it anyway.
The fourth time she drags Steve Rodgers in from the alley behind the diner, grinning despite the way he swayed, unsteady on his feet with at least one of his eyes swollen shut, she knew it was too late.
“When are you going to learn Stevie? Maybe next time just walk away - y’know? Not everything is worth the fight.”
“Not an option” He grumbles stubbornly, wincing as she applies ice to his face. She knows it won’t be long before he slumps over the counter, the last of the adrenaline running out of his body.
Returning to New York felt inevitable. She loved the hustle and bustle of the streets, giving her enough anonymity to feel safe while still being around civilization enough to really feel alive. It had changed quite a bit since the last time she was there though. Tough times had fallen on the city, but if the news papers were to be believed, the depression would be over soon. Roosavelt’s New Deal seemed to be working.
The lunchtime rush comes and goes without Steve making much move to leave, other than coughing wetly against the crook of his elbow a few times. Grace glances up at the door as the bell chimes, locking eyes with the newest patron as he saunters in, heading straight towards her.
“Hey doll.”
Finding herself mimicking the boyish grin, Grace grabs a fresh mug off the bottom shelf and sets to making a fresh pot of coffee without prompting.
“Hey yourself. Come to pick up your stray?” She adds, inclining her head to Steve who doesn’t make any attempt to register his friend’s arrival.
“Oh boy.” Nodding with a grimace, James Barnes gently claps the smaller man’s shoulder. “Michaels said he thought he saw it on his way down to the Yard. I figured he’d show up here. Stevie? You okay pal?”
Grace pushes the cup of joe across the counter. “It’s on me. You’re gonna have to give him a few. It was a real doozy this time.” She adds, furrowing her brow.
James groans, taking the cup with a nod of thanks. He sounds exasperated. “Damnit Steve, why can’t you just leave it be just once. One time. That too much to ask?”
Steve slurs, his voice muffled. “Should’a seen t’other guy.”
With a scoff, he rolls his eyes. “Yeah, I bet.”
Catching his eye, Grace motions for James to follow her a few feet out of earshot. She casts a worried glance over to the hunched figure. “You best keep an eye on him tonight Buck. He was coughing up a storm not ten minutes ago.”
“Damn, I thought he was over that. He seemed a lot better last couple of days. Obviously well enough to pick a fight.”
“You’d think he’d learn huh?” She muses with a snort, admiring the fact Steve Rodgers would never change.
Huffing a laugh, he looks back to her arching a brow. “Good job he found you huh doc? – How is school?”
Reluctant to get into the details, she glances down to her feet. “Just swell. Six months or so left then it’s over. Thank God.” Grace sighs, wiping the coffee stains on the counter absently.
“You’ll do great.” He says encouragingly with a smile.
The corner of her mouth quirks up. Eager to change the subject, she narrows her eyes at him slightly. “Have you been lifting weights again?”
James’ grin grows wide as he puffs out his chest, not modest in the slightest. “Oh, noticed, did you? As a matter of fact, I’ve been training at Goldie’s Gym. Nice to know it’s been paying off.”
“Was mostly the smell, but sure thing.” Grace quips with a flash of a smile.
“It’s the fish.” Steve supplies dryly – his voice still muffled against the counter.
James’ face twists in mock offence. “Hey!”
The warmth Grace feels inside tells her that getting attached is definitely a bad idea, but it doesn’t stop her from laughing anyway.
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Masterlist
Thought I'd go ahead and put all of these in one place for my own sanity 😂
I’d love to get some feedback on these, as well as ideas or requests for fics!
🥰 = Fluff
💧= Angst
📱= Groupchat
⭐ = Most Noted
Peter Parker x Reader
Cuddles and Pick-up Lines - Peter is feeling down, can Y/N cheer him up? 🥰💧⭐
Comfort Me - Olivia is Peter’s best friend, without a doubt. But what will happen when these two friends both start feeling like they want something more? 💧🥰
Part 1, Part 2 
Duct Tape -Y/N has a slight mishap in the lab and Peter helps out. Fluff! 🥰
Don’t Look at Me, I’m Sick! -Y/N has the flu, Peter is a protective boyfriend. 🥰
Sleepless in the Tower -Peter Parker x Reader request: Y/N’s drunk, Bucky’s angry, and Peter just wants to get some sleep. 🥰 ⭐️
Guilty- Peter Parker x Reader request: Peter is worried the dangers of being Spiderman’s girlfriend is too much for you. Barnes-Rodgers!Reader.
Part 1, Part 2
Unexpected - Peter Parker x Reader request: Y/N and Peter are hiding something from the team, but what could it be? Barnes-Rodgers!Reader 💧🥰⭐️
Loki x Reader
Boyfriend? - Y/N and Loki have been getting closer for several weeks, but he’s still very ambivalent about their relationship status. Toss in a Stark party and an over eager fan and what will happen? 💧🥰 ⭐
Jealous of a Kitten -  When Y/N gains a new companion, Loki doesn't fair so well. 🥰 ⭐
Is That...? -  Loosely follows the plot of Thor Ragnarok. What will happen when the reader finds out that Loki has actually been alive for the past 4 years? 💧🥰
Thor x Reader
Stressed Out - Reader is stressed, Thor's away. 🥰
Bucky Barnes x Reader
When the Party’s Over -Song fic. 💧
“I’ll Be Here” - Y/N hasn’t been sleeping well, can Bucky find out why? 💧🥰 ⭐
Steve Rodgers x Reader
Nothing yet!
Groupchats
Peter X Barnes-Rodgers!Female Reader
Too Friendly -  Loosely based on the Parks and Rec bit about the coffee machine, what happens when someone eats the last of Y/N’s sweets? 📱⭐
There’s Something Going on with Peter and Y/N -  Just what I imagine would happen if the team started asking questions about the daughter of two super soldiers and a certain spiderchild. 📱⭐
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4
Pay Up Bitch - Y/N introduces a Tumblr meme to the group and things go about as well as you’d expect. 📱
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3
Last Friday Night - One of the young Avengers stumbles upon some of Thor’s liquor, and things do not go well. 📱⭐️
Preview, Part 1, Part 2
Spooky Time- It's Halloween time in the tower! 📱
Part 1, Part 2
What’s Going on Parker? - How will Y/N react to Peter avoiding her lately? 📱
Turkey Time - It's Thanksgiving, but one of the team isn't feeling so thankful.. 📱
Part 1, Part 2
Sick Day - Y/N is sick, and there's no one left in the tower to take care of her. What will she do? 📱
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3
The One with all the Puppies - Tony thinks Y/N and Peter are hiding something, but what is it? 📱
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3
Unsolved Mysteries -  Y/N’s unaccounted for once again, where will the team find her this time and what has she been up to?? 📱
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4
Adventures in Babysitting -  When the team is away someone is tasked with “babysitting” Y/N. Things go about as well as you’d expect. 📱
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3
Emergency Pizza - A typical day in the groupchat turns scary. 📱
Part 1, Part 2
Yellow Day - The team learns about Y/N’s ‘system’. 📱
Part 1, Part 2
Alls Fair in Love and Vines - Y/N and her dad are locked in a VERY serious battle, and the whole team gets involved. 📱
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3
Drugs are Bad, Mmmkay? -  Its intervention time. Steve and Bucky find something suspicious in Y/N’s bedroom, but is it really as bad as they think? 📱⭐
Part 1, Part 2
STREET SMARTS! - Loki has been acting strangely lately, and Y/N and Peter are the only ones who know why. 📱
Part 1, Part 2
Surprise! -  Y/Ns gone... again. The group wildly speculates about what she's doing , but are they right? 📱
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3
You're all Grounded - Movie night traditions are ignored, Y/N makes a fatal mistake, everyone is in trouble. 📱
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3
Drunken Idiots -  Peter and Y/N seem...different. 📱
Part 1, Part 2
JK...Lol...Unless? - An accidental text to the groupchat causes the whole team to spiral. 📱⭐️
Part 1, Part 2, Finale
Is This a Pregnant Thing? -  A snapshot into Y/N's pregnancy through the eyes of the ever-ridiculous group message.  📱 ⭐️
Part 1, Part 2
You Don't Mess With Y/N - Everyone knows you don't piss off Y/N. What will happen when someone ignores the warning? 📱
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4
Steve x Reader
The Bet - Everyone ditches training except Y/N and Steve. What could possibly go wrong? Steve x female reader. 📱
Part 1, Part 2
Loki x Reader
Googly Eyes - Y/N enlists the help of her favorite Avengers (and Tony) but things don't go as planned. Loki x Reader! 📱
Part 1, Part 2
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scarlettswxtch · 5 years
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HEARTBREAK HOTEL
Pairing: Bucky x Reader / Steve x Reader
Description: Set in post-civil-war. The Avengers have been back together for a while now, you return to the compound after Tony asks for your help on a mission. After months of being MIA, you haven’t seen your team in a while and two certain super soldiers are who you’re dreading to see most.
Prompt: “After everything I’ve done for you!” / “That I didn’t ask for!”
Word count: 4,979 (omg)
Warning: ANGST ANGST ANGST™️, all my fics are intended for 18+ readers
A/N: Firstly, Whew! This was the first ever angsty fic AND I've ever written and damn if I didn’t cry a bit. I kinda like how it went so...I may make this a mini-series? Let me know what you guys think and I’ll get to it. Secondly, I such at summaries so I’m v sorry lol.
This is for @moonbeambucky’s 5k writing challenge!! The prompt is above :) again, congrats on your milestone Tara, darling ❤️ and thank you for letting me participate, it was super fun to explore the angsty side of fanfiction with that lil prompt :))) I know it’s from Crazy Ex-Girlfriend which is a comedy show but, I felt like writing something a little dark and sad hehe, hope you don’t mind + i hope you enjoy it ✨
Also a side note - I got my info about Aleksander Lukin from here if anyone’s wondering.
˜”*°•.˜”*°• Listen for the full experience •°*”˜.•°*”˜
Song(s): Rebekah - Jack Vallier for Bucky x Reader / Girlfriends - The Academic for Steve x Reader
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Softly splashing water droplets hit the car windows as you were driven onwards. The skies are overhung with a blanket of grey, so much so that you can barely tell the difference between the sky and clouds. Despite car rides feeling tedious, the rain is commonly calming - you watch raindrops race down to the windows. The occasional wave of a puddle can be exciting, but right now you’d rather be outside in those puddles than stuck in this car.
It was almost midnight, Tony had called you 5 hours ago, pleading. His voice unusually tired - worn, even. As if he’d been yelling for hours. The team needed your help for a mission and you went despite the circumstances - greater good and everything. Your eyes closed over.
“Honey, come on...it’s - we can’t do this without you” Tony was using his soft voice. Tony never used his soft voice unless it was serious. You heard the helpless plea behind his voice and you faltered.
“Is he there?”
“Who?”
“You know who Tony” you clipped, impatient. You knew he would be, but you needed to hear it. This was pathetic and your heart sped.
“He is...but we can arrange-“
You cut him off. “No. Send a car for me, I’ll be there.” And with that, you cut the line off.
The car came to a sudden stop and your eyes fluttered open. “Is here ok, Miss?” The driver asked.
“Here’s fine, thank you” normally, you’d accompany your gratitude with a smile. But, not tonight.
It was still raining as you stepped out of the car. You didn’t want to move, despite the feeling the rain soak your hair, clothes, shoes. The sunset was long gone, leaving only a starless sky. Puffs of grey cloud had swooped into the air like an armed patrol and had surrounded the moon from all sides. There was nothing more that it could do but sit and wait for itself to be completely engulfed by its attackers, you couldn’t help but relate to that. The compound loomed before you and you wondered what level of hell you were in.
“Kid! What the hell? Are you trying to get sick?”
Tony appeared in front of you, snapping you out of whatever daydream you were in. His arms encircled you and you found the strength to hug him back.
“Cmon, let's get inside before we both freeze,” he says, all gentle as he guides you to the hall. He has both his hands on your shoulder, watching you with carefully. His face flickered with something joyless. “Teams missed you, honey.”
A soft, pained smile took over your features and you squeezed Tony’s hand despite yourself “I’ve missed them too,”
That unspoken question lingered in the air ‘Why won’t you come back?’ ‘What can I do to make it better?’. You hadn’t seen most of them in months, except Natasha and Wanda. They were your girls. They weren’t simply good friends, they have become part of your soul. When life became a storm they were the boat that kept the briny water from entering your lungs. They were love when you needed it and you thanked them with all that you were. Yet the storm wasn’t over; the winds raged, seeking to crush what was left of you.
You cleared your throat. “Let’s not keep them waiting then,” you said, uncharacteristically cheery. Tony saw through it but he said nothing.
You began walking, eyes flickering from wall to wall. This compound that was once your home felt like nothing but a stranger to you. You felt tears prick at your eyes and you blamed them on the vases of blossoms which gave off a cloying scent that made your eyes itch. Denial is a great thing.
“Ladies first,” Tony said as the elevator doors opened. You stepped inside despite your body screaming for you to flee. Tony grabbed your hand, you hadn’t realised you were trembling so much. You looked at him in silent gratitude as he drew small circles against your wrist, calming you as each second passed. The tough girl act never did convince him.
~~
It was shortly after the battle between Cap and Tony. You were certain Stark would never forgive you for siding with Steve. Yet, you were surprised to find out how he’s done everything he could to keep you off the files, keep you off Ross’ radar. Nobody would ever know you were part of the whole thing. For all they knew, you had been helping Pepper with overseas business in Australia, oblivious to the circumstances back home.
Your heart swelled when you found out. Tony was like a father to you, always had been. That’s why it broke your heart to fight against him. He knew it was for love, so he forgave you for your blatant naivety. His little girl, “Always so easily fooled,” He had told you as you stood at his doorstep, eyes brimming with tears as you told him everything, told him how he was insufferably right from the beginning.
“You want me to kick his ass?”
You shook your head, “I just wanna come home”
He took you in as if you’d never left.
~~
The elevator doors opened and you stepped into the conference room, eyes downcast - too afraid to see your friends. You could feel every pair of eyes watching you, glued to you. Your eyes shot up and your gaze instantly connected with the man sitting at the head of the table, all beautiful and strong like he’d always been. His eyes were the ocean, so full of life yet so uncertain. You remembered how his blue-green hue carried his emotional currents, before you could breathe you would always drown. Except this time they were blank, the warmth they once radiated replaced with betrayal and hurt - your heart clenched. Oh, Stevie. God, you wondered if he’d ever forgive you for disappearing like that.
You wanted nothing more than to run to him, have him scream bloody murder at you as you wrap your arms around him - pouring out those words that perpetually lingered in your mind, forever unsaid: “It's been forever and many days since we last spoke; I'm sorry. In this time we have become new people, yet at our core we are truly the same. In all honesty, I need the asylum version of friendship more than I need air, water or food. I need to be sheltered and nurtured until my shattered soul has repaired enough to function and give love into the world. I love you either way, yet I am asking with my heart in your hands, if you will be the harbour in this storm that has come to my shores.”
He looked away from you, jaw clenched. The room was unbearably quiet and you dared not look towards the icy blue gaze which pinned you down, his features working with a dilemma of his own.
You realised the room only had half the team. Nat, Wanda, Sam and Clint were missing. That left the room with Steve, Tony, Vision...and Bucky. Tony must’ve sensed your confusion because he filled you in seconds later, “We sent a team out to check a HYDRA base in Rio. They’ll be back tomorrow morning”. Great. Just your luck. You had hoped at least Sam would be around. Sam was the perfect friend and he would at least be able to distract you.
You nodded and took your usual seat near Steve. You could see him tense, clearly uncertain about your proximity.
“It’s nice to have you back,” says Vision from across the table and you smile at him warmly in thanks. Bucky was beside him and you could feel his gaze on you- you could feel it from the moment you stepped in the room and how it hasn’t left you since. You didn’t look at him. Fucking hell, the room couldn’t feel tenser if it tried.
Tony clapped loudly to get everyone’s attention “Alright kids, here’s the deal”, he begins, a small remote in his hand as the projector flicks to an image of a man in his middle 40s. You hear an intake of breath from Steve and Bucky’s metal arm shift in what you could only guess was surprise and discomfort. “Cap and Tinman should be pretty familiar with this guy,” Tony says. You studied the screen - he was attractive for his age, to say the least. Salt and pepper hair, dark blue eyes and olive skin now slightly wrinkled with old age.
“Aleksander Lukin, owner of Kronas Corporation, born in the Soviet village of Kronas some time in the 1930’s” Tony continues and you frown.
“1930s?” You asked, “Wouldn’t that make him-“
“89? Yeah, it would. We can only guess his slow ageing is a product of HYDRA’s serum experimentation. Lukin's village was used by the Red Skull as a base of operations during the Second World War. Soviet troops attempted to retake the town, Rodgers assisted them but Lukin's mother was killed in the course of battle.”
Tony flicks to the next image “Vasily Karpov, took Lukin under his wing. We sent Romanoff out to Russia to investigate further after Karpov was killed. Turns out Lukin was left in custody of a large cache of special projects developed over the decades, including the Winter Soldier.” You saw Bucky clench his jaw from the side of your eye. Your instincts wanted nothing more than to reach over and comfort him, but you remained still.
“He sold some of these devices to the highest bidders to raise funds. Some of those weapons went to A.I.M, which was taken town 3 years ago, courtesy of yours truly. Lukin has been under the radar until a few days ago when we got some intel that he’d got his hands on the reality-altering cosmic cube.”
“F.R.I.D.A.Y take the wheel,” Tony said, and the projection of the cube appeared. It was small and somehow looked like it was made of glass and marble.
F.R.I.D.A.Y’s voice took over the room. “The Cosmic Cube is thought to originate from space. It seems that it is a living being in embryonic form. It contains its own consciousness, seemingly patterning after the consciousness of an unknown being.“
“Thank you darling” Tony tells F.R.I.D.A.Y as he points at the projection “That’s what we’re looking for”
“The entire time we knew the Red Skull all he wanted with that cube was to rule the world. Wouldn’t put it past Lukin to want the same” You heard Steve say - he was using his serious ‘Captain America’ voice “It is absolutely imperative we get it off him” he finishes and your eyes lift to Tony.
“What’s the plan?”
“You are,” He said and you lifted a brow. “Luckily for us, Lukin has a soft spot for gorgeous women. It’s absolutely essential you distract him by whatever means necessary,”
You pursed your lips “Why didn’t you get Natasha to do this?”
“Natasha’s high profile, ever since the whole Accords thing, everyone knows her face.”
You nodded and Tony continued. “This is a highly sensitive undercover mission. We got some information a few days ago about a gala being held in honour of Lukin, to celebrate the firms ‘biggest milestone yet’. We can only guess they mean the Cube.”
Tony turns, flickering the screen once more as an aerial view of an incredible large castle comes into frame “Gala’s being held at one of Lukin’s residences. I had F.R.I.D.A.Y do a scan of the building and turns out there’s an underground facility. Heavily guarded, heavily supervised.”
Tony throws Lukin’s mission file at you “Learn that like your life depends on it. We can’t have any slip ups” you nodded, slightly offended. You were one of the best master spies in the game. You and Nat were absolutely unstoppable together. There was nothing you weren’t good at; martial arts, acrobatics, expert marksman, hacker, interrogator, pilot - were all in your resume. Nick Fury wouldn’t just hire an idiot.
“I assume this isn’t a one-woman mission?”
“No. We wouldn’t just send you there alone,” Steve said.
Tony’s lips pursed “Tinman and Steve will accompany you to the gala” Fuck, you cursed inwardly. Nothing could be worse than that information. “Nat and I will be on coms back at the Quinjet in case you need backup.”
Tony waved his band at you and Bucky “I know things haven’t been peachy between the two of you but it’s important you don’t let emotions get mixed up in this. So, sort it out soon so you don’t fuck up the mission.” You bit the inside of your cheek in anxiety, feeling Bucky’s eyes on you as you stared into the distance, sparing neither of them a glance. Steve twitched in his chair, and you wish he’d reach out and touch you - ease your distress and tell you everything would be ok because he’d be right here. Like he used to. But he remained still, not like you deserved it anyway. You knew this moment was coming but, you had hoped with every ounce of your being that it wouldn’t. Fun fact, kids: deflecting does nothing but postpone the inevitable.
“Alright. Class dismissed” Tony said and with that, you grabbed your file, shot up from the chair and left the conference room faster than lightning.
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This is how it goes: everyone’s got a bone to pick. You had one to pick with yourself when you decided to fall for James Barnes. Falling was definitely the easy part. Yes, it was like bliss - sometimes, you wanted to reach up and grab onto something to stop yourself from plummeting but, you grasped thinning oxygen instead. Now you’re left here, half dead. When it is your love that kills you, no destruction is more laughably ironic than that of the self.
You remember the moment he broke you - your skin lit with righteous fury and you wondered if this was your punishment for loving someone more broken than you were. You remember how you used to lie beneath him in bed, or how he’d simply look at you from across the room - those icy blue eyes full of tenderness yet so void. You knew he’d break you, yet you loved him anyway. Your mother always told you how you could never love someone unless you love yourself first. Total bullshit. You’ve never loved yourself, not really - but him? Jesus, you loved him so much you forgot what hating yourself felt like.
It was almost 2am now as you stood outside the compound’s balcony. The rain had stopped and left wet puddles along the glass floor - you were barefoot and a cigarette was lit between your lips. You tilt your head, gazing upward, eyes more open than they can be in the fullness of day, not looking at one star, yet somehow seeing them all at once.
“Doll?” You hear from behind you. You didn’t jump at the intrusion in your quietness because it was expected. You said nothing, your back was turned to him and you continued to stare into the abyss of the dark landscape beyond the compound. The sound of his boots was accompanied by tiny splashes of rain puddles as he made his way towards you.
“Look at me,” he said - Bucky’s voice was rough yet velvety at the same time - you wondered how someone could sound like they could kill you and offer your body the most gentle touch at the same time. Your head involuntarily moved, your eyes meeting his after many months and you blinked. Even in the darkness, his eyes were seriously blue. Almost sickeningly blue - full-on Prince Charming, field of cornflower, perfect, cloudless sky blue. Someone should name a crayon after the guy.
You blew smoke out of your lips, lifting a brow in question mostly because you had no words to say.
There was a half-empty ache in your soul as Bucky watched you, his mouth dry as he watched you move. He wondered what it would be like to kiss you again, your blossom-soft lips sweet on his, always glistening with madness and love-sick desire. The memory was almost enough to make him smile. He knew you only smoked when you were anxious, stressed, unsure of what to do with yourself. He’d always find you right here, looking at nothing as you contemplated everything. He missed that, just finding you in places even when he wasn’t looking. Bucky reaches over and tenderly plucks the cigarette from between your lips, crushing it with his foot. You looked at him with cheeks stained with tears you didn’t even realise were there. His heart breaks a little and he can’t help but think he’s too late and you’ve lost your way and all that remains is you and him and this hopeless tragedy all lovers leave behind.
“Sweetheart I...” he began, his hand reaching for your face as if touching you could wipe away all the pain and make it all okay again. It probably could, your mind said and you hated yourself for that.
You flinched away from him as if he were hot scorching fire and he dropped his hand “No Bucky. Don’t fucking touch me,” you spat. You were angry. Angry because being angry was better than tears, grief or guilt. You gripped the balcony railing tightly with one hand despite the fact that your palm was sore and burned. Your nails dug deep into your other hand, almost enough to draw blood. A tear rolled onto your cheek, but you didn't care; you had to stay focused. “I don’t think we have anything to say to each other”
“Really? Cause the way you’re acting right now tells me somethin’ else doll,” he stepped closer to you “We need to talk it out.”
“The way I’m acting?” You scoffed “What exactly were you expecting? Did you want me to throw myself in your arms, kiss like you never did a thing?” you closed the space between you and looked at him like he was venom “I don’t know about you baby,” the last word came out like poison and Bucky’s jaw clenched “but I don’t think I can ever do that again”
No, you certainly couldn’t. You convinced yourself you couldn’t -, especially after everything.
~~
It hit your hard when he did it. His words like nails and hammers breaking your heart apart. You had been on the run with him, Sam and Steve for months. The first day didn't even feel real. A nightmare come true, maybe. You found yourself waiting to wake up. But that never happened. You cried and cried to Sam, told him you needed to go home and he helped you readily. Your Sammy, he was always so sweet, a big joker who did everything for you without question. He got you to the airport, saying nothing to Steve and Bucky. He protested at first, uncomfortable with the idea but you knew Steve would try to convince you to stay, make things work. He’d probably be able to - you always did have a soft spot for those baby blues.
When you arrived at Tony’s doorstep, he was there for you but you never felt so alone. Completely, utterly alone, without him to comfort you. A million questions rushed to your head: “Who will wipe away my tears now? Who will hold my hand? Who will surprise me with hugs from behind? Who will tell me they love me and call me beautiful?” Not him. Not anyone anymore. You now lacked that someone who had been with me for over a year. That same someone who promised you a forever only to leave when things became too hard. And now he’s gone. Gone like the ink leaving pen. Soon enough he’ll forget about you.
You wanted to call him, ask him: “Did you cry at all? Did it hurt you at all... when you said you weren't happy anymore? When you said you didn't love me anymore? You let me buy you food. You let me drive you home. You let me love you that night. The night before it all. You kissed me that night. You told me you loved me that night. Did you lie? Or were your feelings able to fade so quickly? You're a coward. A coward that I should hate. I should hate you. I should be angry with you, but I can't. I'm worried for you... I wish the best for you. I just want you to have happiness again, even if that means I have to sacrifice my own. I would have done anything for you, you know? I loved you. I wanted to be the very best for you. I was the very best for you, but my best wasn't ever enough to satisfy you was it? Maybe that's what hurts the most.”
~~
You clenched your jaw, your nails digging deeper into your palm as if to focus the pain elsewhere “Some days I can’t stop thinking about you, other days I wonder why I’m wasting my time”
Bucky sighed, his hands running over his face in exasperation “I didn’t ask you to throw yourself in like that. I didn’t want any of it. I didn’t fucking ask you for any of it”
You shook your head in utter disbelief and wondered if he was truly this oblivious “You don’t ask for love Bucky! What the fuck is wrong with you? It doesn’t work like that, it’s give and take with no questions asked. Even a bloody wall would know that”
“I wasn’t built like that and you know it”
You scoff, “you had a life before you became who you are now, surely you remember how it feels like to love and be loved”
His eyes darken “Sorry to disappoint you, sugar, but loves pretty alien to me. I never asked for any of yours”
Your eyes and tone turn bitter and sad: “I gave you all and you gave me shit!” He shrugged as if that meant nothing to him and your eyes sprouted tears which fled unchecked “After everything I’ve done for you!”
“That I didn’t ask for!” he shouts, wanting nothing more than to flee from this conversation. Ironic, since he started it.
Your voice was quiet next, controlled even - almost threatening “You’re a fucking idiot. You never could stand being blamed for something you’ve done wrong, could you?”
“I didn’t do shit.” He growled, “I told you the deal and you stayed with me anyway, your pain is your fucking problem,”
That was the breaking point of your patience. At that moment, you were blinded by a five-course serving of rage that tasted bitter, yet surprisingly satisfying. You reached out and punched him in the face. Your voice rose above the sacred silence as you spluttered words your own mind didn’t register. You went to attack him again but he held you down, pinning your arms behind your back, your face now dangerously close to his. When he looked down at you there was no trace of emotion, not in his eyes or in marks on his reddening face. His eyes were narrowed, rigid, cold, hard. In that moment you knew he was already far away. Once more you were the enemy. These swings from most loved to most hated would be the end of you. His temper had no greyscale, only the polar extremes existed. You drew in a deep breath, the burning hard stare would last only as long as it took him to think of the most brutally cutting thing he could tear you down with.
His face brightened, just a tone lighter than your own crimson. “I didn’t ask for any of it” he spat. “I told you to stay, didn’t I? Do you not remember me asking you not to get involved?” his hands tightened over your wrists, hurting now but you didn’t show. You wanted him to hurt you, maybe it’d make you hate him better. “But no, you had to fucking follow me to Bucharest. Do you have any idea how exhausting it was to be with someone so fucking needy? No wonder I left you” ah, there it was. So much damage was done when Bucky argued. Every mean thing he'd thought but knew better than to say came flooding out. When he saw hurt in his opponent's eyes he never backed off, only dug deeper, like a hunter at the first sign of blood. Even if it was you.
“This right here, all these emotions? I can’t deal with you, I didn’t want any of this shit. You knew it was too much for me,” your eyes shifted to the side and became glazed with a glassy layer of tears. As you blinked, they dripped from your eyelids and slid down your cheeks. You bit your lip tightly in attempt to hide any sound that wanted to escape from your mouth and his heart sank. His eyes turned apologetic and his mouth began to form words you cut off as you ripped yourself from his grasp.
Your lower lip quivered and words slowly made their way out of your mouth. “You know what’s funny? I can’t even hate you right now. Not even a little bit and that fucking enrages me.” Your veins were full of ice-water now, yet they boiled fervently. You dashed inside, too quick for him to grab you - promising yourself to kill that part of you where he once belonged.
He knew he should’ve gone after you, say sorry and how he meant none of it. A part of you hoped he would. Instead, Bucky stood there silent and unmoving for what seemed like hours and finally, he understood why you liked looking into the darkness so much.
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You stepped into the shower, toes flinching as they touched the chilled marble floor. Your mind was in shreds; you’d never get those words out of your mind.
Do you have any idea how exhausting it was to be with someone so fucking needy?
You turned the dial, new and metallic, releasing thousands of lukewarm drops, darkening your hair and trickling down your back. Your eyes fell closed over and over, each time showing you the words like photographs:
I can’t deal with you
I didn’t want any of this
Were you needy? Had you been too much? Sudden insecurity took over your body, reaching into to the depths of your mind to uncover every instance you showed him love and twisting it into something bad. He had asked you not to come, he had asked you to not get involved, stay behind and be with Pepper. He did. You should’ve listened. Maybe things would be better now if you had, maybe you’d still be together. But no, how could you have? You were a fool who loved him too much to let him do anything alone. You closed your eyes as if it hurt to look at things.
“Darlin?” you hear from the door, your eyes shooting open. It was Steve. You must’ve been quiet too long because he knocked again “Cmon I know you’re in there”
You took a deep breath, calming your nerves “Go away Steve, please” your throat felt tight and you surprised yourself with the calm, controlled coolness of your voice.
“I’m not leaving until you open up” You sighed in resignation, turning off the water and stepping out of the shower. You wrapped a white towel around your form, not caring about that puddles of water your hair was leaving behind.
You swung the door open and Steve stood before you - all righteous and handsome like he’d always been. God, you missed his face; you missed him, every atom of you missed him. "Are you okay?" he asks the question smoothly, the baritone of his voice reverberating through your bones. The low rumble of his voice is comforting despite everything.
“I’m fine”
“You don’t look fine,” he said, eyes roaming over your mascara stained face.
“Then stop looking”
“Cmon darlin’ he didn’t mean any of that. He loves you, I know it - everyone knows it”
You shook your head, scoffing “You can’t actually believe that? Did you hear what he said to me? Did he tell you?”
Steve looked at you apologetically “I heard”. Your lip began to quiver uncontrollably and Steve pulled you close, gently rubbing your arm. Despite the heaviness in your stomach, it fluttered at the feeling of your body pressed against his. You sink into the warmth of his chest, appreciative of the simple gesture. His touch made the room warmer somehow, your future within its walls seems a little less bleak.
“I’m sorry I left you,” you say, so quietly it was barely above a whisper. Steve pulled you closer, kissing the top of your forehead in what you assumed was forgiveness. “He doesn’t love me,” you said unconsciously, distractedly.
“Cmon sweetheart-“ he began but your head shook against his chest in defiance and he stopped speaking.
“I don’t think he knows how to love anything, Stevie,” you say and Steve’s jaw clenches. He pulls you closer and you wish you could melt into him. “Will you stay with me, please?” you ask and look up at him with eyes pleading; round with unspilled tears. I’m that moment he could’ve sworn there was nothing more lovely in the galaxy - angels would be fools not to damn themselves for you.
“Sure darlin’, anything,” he said without thinking and you slither your arms across his waist, pressing a small kiss on his chest.
“I really missed you, Stevie”
“Me too, doll” he replies, barely above a whisper.
You spent the rest of the night in Steve’s arms, warm and sweet and in this moment you felt like everything would be okay.
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miss-eucatastrophe · 6 years
Text
Chapter 3: Bruises
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A/N: My first ever FF– Previously posted only on AO3, now available here. I hope you like it! I have no beta so please forgive any mistakes! (I’m still getting the hang of tumblr)
Pairing: Bucky x PlusSize!OFC/Serum!OFC (Can also be read as a Bucky X Reader fic. Your name is Cassandra. You’re welcome you beautiful bitch).
Summary:Trying to integrate into “normal” life, Bucky slowly falls into a routine. Wake up, run, gaze at the woman who works in the toy store as he passes by, eat, mission, sleep, repeat. But when he goes toe to toe with a thief who threaten’s to trash his routine by becoming an obsession, will he be able to put his bizarre life back in order, or will this woman turn his 21st century world on it’s head?Yep, the Bucky/Serum!Reader story you didn’t know you wanted.
Rated: Explicit (For later chapters. Smut does not occur until Ch 12, everything before that point is T or M.)  
Chapter 3:
This was about pride. Bucky wasn’t ashamed to admit that. His ego had been bruised the first time and he wasn’t about to let that happen twice. “I’ve got eyes on the jewels.” He whispered gruffly through their communicators.
“I’ve got rooftop one.” Steve replied.
“I’ve got two.” Sam added.
“Ah good. Actually watching the object this time.”
“Tony.” There was the Captain Voice™.
“And by that I mean, I’ve got three.”
Bucky didn’t want everyone to come along. Hell, he didn’t even want Steve to come this time. But that was his ego talking. She got away once, but this time he knew what he was expecting and he wouldn’t let it happen again.
“Remind me again why we’re not watching any of the doors?” Sam asked from his perch in the Egyptian exhibit.
“How many thieves do you know who just waltz in the front door?” Steve wasn’t often snippy. During missions, he was particularly professional. But, he’d be lying if he said the other night’s blunder didn’t get under his skin as well. He didn’t blame Bucky, though he felt his tension. Steve always took blame upon himself. He really should have had eyes on the crown, and more importantly his oversight had lead to the destruction of a priceless fossil, a lost crown, and destruction of privet property.
“Yeah this chick hates windows as much as Cap here hates doors.” They didn’t need to see Tony’s face to view his smirk. It was obvious- and well… Captain America had destroyed a lot of doors with his mighty shield. Tony started to hum the beginning of Steve’s old theme song- Steve cut him off immediately. “Shut up, Tony.”
“My feelings.” Tony responded, mock pain in his voice.
Then came the crash. They could hear it from Sam’s intercom. “Shit.” He murmured.
This time it wasn’t the rooftop window that shattered, it was one at the ground level. The girl dove through the window, rolling on the floor and drawing her gun, pointing it up at the Falcon in his perch and firing. It was as if she’d known exactly where he was. The bullet missed his chest, hitting a panel at the front of his suit.
Sam jumped off the perch to dive down at the woman. He extended his wings only to find out, too late, that one wouldn’t open. The bullet had jammed into one of the main panels of his suit in just the right brittle section. He cursed, trying to right himself with one wing, twirling to the ground in a graceless spiral.
The Falcon continued his path downward, heading straight for a series of glass cases. The woman ran from her crouched position, springing up beside him as he neared the floor and delivered a kick to his side, sending him propelling to a display of stuffed mannequins. It should have added insult to injury, but it was a much softer landing by comparison to the glass cases.
When Sam’s world stopped spinning, he stood up on unsteady legs, using one of the mannequins that was still standing as a support. The girl was gone. “I’m grounded.” He groaned, taking off his goggles and rubbing his head.
“Stay put. I’m coming.” Steve murmured, pushing off the wall he’d been crouched beside.
“Stay in position, Rodgers!” Whenever they were on a mission, Steve and Tony fought for dominance like a couple of children. It was a constant mystery as to who was really in charge of the whole thing. Most of the time the team just followed whoever’s orders sounded more reasonable, or they acted as a team, using the information given to them to make the best call for their actions. But it didn’t quell Steve and Tony’s bickering.
In this case however, things had been decided for him. Their target landed in front of the star-spangled hero, stopping his charge for the Egyptian exhibit. With that mask in place he couldn’t see her smile. “Captain.” She said sweetly. The sweet tone didn’t seem to be mocking. It was almost like she was genuinely happy to see him.
A tone that was contradicted by the balled fist she had aimed for his perfect face. Steve flicked his shield from his back and thrusted it in front of the fist. When her fist made contact with the shield, the sound reverberated around the room. Such a hit should have shattered the girl’s hand. But to Steve’s surprise and confusion, she pulled back and used the force of her punch to skid backwards away from the super soldier.
“Most men are opposed to protection.” She murmured, standing back with her hip cocked, the mask muffling her voice.
“I’m old fashioned.” Steve shot back. There was a pause-- a tension between them as if they were waiting to see who would blink first. It was Steve.
He threw his shield in the girl’s direction and charged after it. She dropped to her knees, the disk flying over her head, kicking her leg out as the Captain approached, knocking out his knees and sending him onto his back. She pressed her palms to the floor and lifted her lower body up, twisting to throw her heels downward on the blue clad man.
He rolled out of the way, sending her heels into the marble floor and creating a crack that webbed out from the impact.
Steve sprung to his feet and ran to where his shield had embedded itself in one of the opposing pillars, yanking it from the stone with great effort. The Captain turned in time to see the thief running at him. She leapt into the air, using the momentum of her fall to deliver a kick to the captain.
He was seeing a pattern, she did a lot of her combat with her legs, preferring kicks over punches.
He crouched and held his shield over his head, bracing himself as her boot came down on it. He pushed up, forcing the girl upwards to the ceiling. Lowering his shield, he looked up to see the girl gripping the chandelier.
The girl kicked her legs, swinging from the chandelier. She built enough momentum to let go of the sparkling decoration and drop onto the ledge of the second floor. She hooked herself against the banister and swung over. “Thanks for the lift.”
Steve cussed and ground his teeth. “Language.” Tony called over the intercom.
Steve ignored him. “She’s heading your way, Buck.”
Bucky smirked and dug his metal fingers into the column he’d been hiding behind. “Copy.”
He heard steady footsteps and watched from around the corner as the woman approached the necklace. She lifted the case and set it down on the floor, as if trying to cause minimal damage this time. She plucked the jeweled necklace from its headless torso display and placed it around her neck, turning in the direction where Bucky was shrouded by shadows.
“What do you think, handsome? Is it my color?” She cocked a hip and pushed the mannequin off of the podium to rest her elbow there, posing. “I’ve never been a big fan of the way emeralds look on me.” She murmured, her fingers caressing the main gem that hung low on her neck.
“You’d look better in sapphire.” Bucky mumbled, stepping out of the shadows.
“Oh good! I was worried I’d have to come drag you out here.” She purred, though Bucky’s jaw tightened. He walked closer to the woman. She eyed his shoulders, focused on the way he moved. In her mind she compared him to a panther, slinking closer to it’s pray. She pushed away from the podium so they could circle each other and for that moment nothing else existed.
“Someone’s mad about last time.” She smirked behind her mask, tilting her head to the side.
“Didn’t realize how strong you were last time.” Bucky stopped his pacing, all muscles wound tight under his black clothing.
The thief mimicked the action, stopping in her tracks, the only thing moving was the necklace between her breasts. It rose and fell with each calculating breath. “That was stupid of you.”
With that Bucky charged at her, gripping her around the waist and pinning her back against the podium. He reached beside her and gripped her wrist in a vice with his metal hand, struggling to hold her in place. She hooked her legs upwards, folding herself over and dislodging his arms from her waist and wrist, gripping his neck between her knees. She used her new position as leverage, resting her forearms back on the podium for stability and twisting her lower body to knock the man off his feet.
With Bucky on his back, he curled and thrusted back up to get on his feet, the woman, crouched on the podium. He drew two of his guns from his hips and fired at her, forcing her to spring upwards to avoid the bullets. She ran across the room, Bucky’s bullets following her movements until she slid over a row of display cases and ducked behind them for cover.
“Calm down terminator. We want her alive.” Tony flew into the room, dropping down with a thud, the Captain right behind him.
Tony lifted his hands, palms of his suit glowing as they powered up for a blast.
“Alright Miley Cyrus, give it up.” Bucky and Steve looked at Tony with confused expressions. Bucky arched a brow, and Steve squinted.
Sam came in in time to explain. “Because she came in like a wrecking ball.” He muttered, gun drawn.
“I thought it was clever.” Tony murmured defensively. Bucky and Steve were still baffled but let it go, peering at the jewelry display case that the woman had hid behind. Bucky holstered one of his guns in favor of keeping only one pointed in her direction. No sound came from behind the case.
They remained in an unrequited stand off until Bucky got frustrated and became the first to move. Tony reached forward, taking Bucky’s shoulder in a tight fist to keep him back, but even in his iron suit Bucky shrugged the hand off.
The former Winter Soldier jumped onto the case, pointing his gun downward at-
Nothing.
His blue eyes narrowed and he barred his teeth, growling deep in his chest. “Son of a bitch.” There was a hole clearly punched or kicked in the base of the wall large enough for the thief to fit through.
“Language.” Tony called for the second time that night.
“One goddamn time.” The Captain muttered, shooting Tony a look.
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
“How many avengers does it take to shut down one thief?” Sam grumbled in the morning after they’d all been well rested from the night before and had finished licking their wounds.
“Evidently a number greater than four.” Tony commented, throwing himself into one of the armchairs in the lounge. “But hey if we’re bringing more in- how about we make it the young ones. You know. Ones that’ll get my jokes. I keep forgetting Captain Grandpa and Sargent Senior Citizen over there aren’t hip.”
“She’s strong.” Steve commented, rubbing the back of his neck which he’d tweaked in his fight with the woman. In reality, it was already healed. The memory was enough to make him sore.
“Let’s change your name to Captain Obvious.” Tony murmured, throwing his arm over his eyes as if to block out the sunshine that had started to coat the compound.
Steve rolled his eyes and sat down on the couch next to Sam while Bucky remained standing behind it, his arms crossed over his chest.
“What I mean is that she’s not human.” Steve muttered. Sam nodded and picked up the TV remote, flipping on the news.
“What is she then?” Sam mumbled. He ached in places he didn’t even know he had. He wasn’t going to run today. Steve would have to drag him kicking and screaming like a man baby.
“Asgardian maybe?”
Tony interjected Cap’s thought process immediately. “Nope. Doesn’t sound like a runaway thespian when she speaks.”
“A white ass Hulk?” Sam tried. Tony snorted. He didn’t need to correct that one. That was obviously out.
There was a silence that fell over the room, all eyes on the TV without really watching it. They couldn’t hear it over the wheels turning in their heads anyway.
“A super soldier.” Bucky said suddenly in a horsed hush.
All eyes turned to look at him. “I thought they were all killed by Zemo in Siberia.” Steve’s brow crinkled and Tony frowned. They all tried not to bring up Siberia. Obviously, it wasn’t a happy memory. All had been forgiven but not forgotten. Well, as forgiven as it could be. Tony still harbored some underlying resentment towards the metal armed member of their team. He knew it wasn’t necessarily Bucky’s doing, but those scars ran deep.
“They were,” Bucky amended quickly. “But in your 21st century I can’t imagine someone hasn’t managed to copy it.”
“Or something like it.” Tony amended, “HYDRA?” Steve shrugged and cocked a brow at Tony’s guess. “What would hydra want with museum pieces?”
Sam hissed against the chatter. “Shh! They’re talking about the artifacts on the news.”
Tony reached for the remote instinctively and turned up the volume. Some people just always had to be in control of the remote.
“- and in an odd twist of fate the three priceless treasures that had been stolen this week have found their way back home. The pieces were returned to their rightful museums in seamless condition as if they hadn’t been stolen in the first place.” The woman on the screen stated in her best announcer voice, using the Smithsonian as a backdrop for her story.
“Guess the thief had a guilty conscious.” Her co-anchor back at the station added to which the woman nodded with a clearly fake laugh. “Or a change of heart.” She added before they switched topics.
“Why would she give them back?” Steve muttered, running his hand over his brow in frustration.
“She said green wasn’t her color.” Bucky murmured sarcastically. He was bitter. It was clear in his tone.
Steve leaned back, molding into the couch and pinched his brow, sucking in a frustrated breath. “I’m so damn lost.” He mumbled, the hand at his brow shifting upwards to run through his blonde hair. “That makes four of us.” Sam tilted his head back, he could use a nap.
Tony scoffed softly but didn’t add anything.
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
If Bucky’s face often looked pissed, then it looked furious today. He never had to worry about someone talking to him on his run, he didn’t even have to worry about anyone looking at him half the time. But today his face clearly said, ‘don’t even look at me’. As a result, all innocent bystanders practically dove out of the way to avoid him.
Well, almost all.
As Bucky came around the corner, he had to slide to a stop to avoid colliding with a woman. His sneakers skidded against the ground, kicking up what little rocks where there, bringing him chest to chest with Cassandra. She flinched, as if bracing for impact, but it never came. She smiled brightly at Bucky, a Starbucks pink liquid in one hand and a muffin in the other. “Hey.” She said simply, putting the straw between pale pink lips.
“Hey.” He replied sheepishly after a moment of hesitation. “Sorry I… My mind was elsewhere.” He mumbled as she took a sip of her drink.
“Well why don’t you follow me to the shop and tell me about where your minds been?” She asked and gestured with her head in the direction of the shop. “Got here early so I thought I’d go to the coffee shop and pick up some breakfast.”
Bucky looked at the pink drink and arched a brow. “No coffee?”
“Doesn’t work for me.” She replied, though she rushed to add. “I don’t like it anyway. Tastes like tar.” She fished her keys out of the back pocket of her jeans. Finally- a decent view. He looked down at her ass unabashed, only looking up when the door opened. He followed her in, closing the door behind him.
“And since you’re here I might as well put you to work.” She grinned and pointed to the boxes by the door. “They’re kinda heavy for me.”
Bucky smirked and picked up the first bulky box, walking to set it on the back counter where she could sort it. “Anything for you, baby doll.” He murmured with a wink. Spending time around this woman really did bring the old Bucky back. For the time he was with her the weight of the world seemed to be off his shoulders.
Cassandra smiled and bit her lip, a nervous habit it would seem.
Bucky could feel her eyes on him and despite her apparent shyness she made no move to avert her gaze. She followed the path of his arms where flesh mirrored metal, listening to the gears adjust in his metal arms like a symphony and watching the muscles shift and flex under his flesh.
“Shivery isn’t dead after all.” She giggled, taking off her jacket and placing it on the chair at the counter. For this, unfortunately, she had to avert her gaze, turning her back to him.
“It just got frozen for a couple decades.” He shot her a look over his shoulder and his smile faded. “What’s that?” He gestured to her forearm with his chin since his arms were full.
Following his gaze, she looked to her arm which had a harsh purple bruise around her wrist, spanning up half her forearm. Her eyes appeared to glaze over it quickly and she lifted her arms and looked down as if inspecting herself completely. “What’s what?” She looked at Bucky, brows up and eyes wide in an innocent expression.
Bucky dropped the box on the counter and took her right arm gently in his metal hand, letting her wrist rest in his palm. “This.” Blue eyes narrowed, his flesh hand taking hers gingerly so he could inspect the bruise. “Oh!” She exclaimed as if she hadn’t seen it. It was rather impossible to miss. “I must have bumped into something.” She slipped her hand from Bucky’s and rubbed at her wrist tenderly with a bright smile and a shrug of her shoulders. “As you know I’m not very graceful.”
She laughed at the joke at her own expense but Bucky’s skeptical gaze remained. The bruise was fresh, only a few hours old at most judging by it’s deep coloring. Bruises didn’t start to yellow until about three days after infliction. At four hours they were a light purple and at twenty-four a deeper one. This bruise was between the two. She would remember how she got it.
Even through her absentminded rubbing of the area, Bucky could make out it’s shape. An oval like formation on the top of her forearm, four long and narrow bruises on the side and one wrapping under to connect with the four. It was as if she’d been gripped. Though each section had wider areas of blank space than a normal hand’s knuckles would create where they met.
Bucky opened his mouth to speak when the front door chimed and a man and woman pushing a baby carriage came in. “Morning Cassie!” They pipped up, giving a little nod and mouthing a ‘good morning’ to Bucky as well though they didn’t know him.
Cassandra turned her head to regard the family of three with one of her signature bright smiles. “Good morning Mr. and Mrs. Thomson… And Baby Thomson.” She added jokingly. The brunette turned her focus back to Bucky and shrugged. “Duty calls. I’ll see you tomorrow, yeah?”
Bucky gave a short nod and with that Cassandra walked over to the regular customers and he made his way out of the store with one more glance over his shoulder.
A variety of thoughts were rocketing through Bucky’s already scrambled mind but they weren’t adding up.
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sushigirlali · 6 years
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Tagged by @craniumhurricane (how did I know this was coming lololol)
relationship status: Hard pass.
favorite color: Green and Black.
chapstick or lipstick: Both. All about that tinted Burt’s Bees <3
top three ships: Currently obsessed with Kylo Ren and Rey (Star Wars) / Draco Malfoy & Hermione Granger (Harry Potter) / Clarke & Bellamy (The 100)
a couple brotps: Aragorn & Legolas & Gimli (LOTR) / Quentin & Eliot (The Magicians) / Bucky Barnes & Steve Rodgers (Marvel)
last song you listened to: “Where Have You Been?” by Manchester Orchestra
currently reading: The Last Jedi novelization over and over again ;P
last film you watched: Pacific Rim: Uprising!!
favorite snack when you were a kid: Nacho cheese and tortilla chips yo
celebrity crushes: Idris Elba, Priyanka Chopra, Alicia Vikander, Sebastian Stan, Tessa Thompson, Charlize Theron, Carrie Anne Moss, Zach McGowan, Nadia Hilker
decade that you love for fashion: The 90s, which I will single-handedly bring back if I have to!
decade that you love for music: 60s up to maybe ten years ago lol music has gone down the drain...
an underrated artist: Alexisonfire and Envy on the Coast
favorite fic trope: REDEMPTION ARC!! a.k.a. enemies to friends to lovers
something dumb that you have a lot of emotions about: Reylo has taken over my life lol
tv show you wished more people watched: The 100!! Our fanbase is small, but mighty!
tagging: @tothemoonandback08 / @thewanderingapothecary / @eclinu @iamleandrawwz
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mrslilyrogers · 3 years
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Hey could you please use the song At Last Etta James as inspiration for a Steve Rodgers x reader one shot please and thank you 😊
OMG I love that song!!! I already used that as inspiration for a Bucky fic!!! Which can I say is probably my favorite of all the things I’ve written 😍😍😍
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consultingcas · 7 years
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Wow, I’m bad at remembering to do question games. @annie-thyme tagged me in this an AGE ago, and I’m only just getting round to it.
1. Coke or Pepsi: I don’t drink either? Not a big fan of fizzy drinks tbh. Gonna say Pepsi though because Richard’s Pepsi ads are hilarious.
2. Disney or Dreamworks: Disney! I would regularly terrorize my next-door-neighbor at university by playing Disney songs at full volume. He could hear my Disney soundtracks, I never heard any of his heavy metal music. Funny how that one worked out.
3. Coffee or Tea: Tea. Yeah, I’m such a Brit.
4. Books or Movies: Books.
5. Windows or Mac: Mac.
6. DC or Marvel: Marvel. I can’t be dealing with all the grimdark there is in most DC adaptations and I’m a huge fan of Thor.
7. Xbox or Playstation: Playstation! Just got into playing video games lately and I’ve been binging on Skyrim on my PS3.
8. Dragon Age or Mass Effect: Never played either, but Dragon Age because DRAGONS.
9. Night Owl or Early Rise: Night owl.
10. Cards or Chess: Chess
11. Chocolate or Vanilla: Vanilla
12. Vans or Converse: Converse
13. Lavellan, Trevelyan, Cadash or Adaar: No idea what fandom this is from, so I’m skipping it...
14. Fluff or Angst: Angst with a happy ending is my jam. I’m the worst for loving super-angsty fic.
15. Beach or Forest: Forest!
16. Dogs or Cats: Dogs
17. Clear Skies or Rain: Clear skies - rain just stops me going out for walks
18. Cooking or Eating Out: I enjoy cooking, but you can’t beat going out for a nice curry or something that it’s hard to replicate at home
19. Spicy Food or Mild Food: Spicy
20. Halloween/Samhain or Solstice/Yule/Christmas: Christmas
21. Would you rather forever be a little too cold or a little too hot: A little too cold, I can’t deal with hot weather
22. If you could have a superpower, what would it be? I love the idea of being able to shapeshift?
23. Animation or Live Action: Live action
24. Paragon or Renegade: No idea what these are
25. Baths or Showers: Showers, I’m usually too impatient to be off doing things to be chilling in a bath.
26. Team Cap or Team Iron Man: Team Cap! Both because I agree with his position and because Steve Rodgers is my fave
27. Fantasy or Sci-Fi: Fantasy, I love swordfighting and dragons so that’s pretty much a no-brainer for me.
28. Do you have three or four favourite quotes? If so, what are they:
“A good bookshop is just a genteel Black Hole that knows how to read.” - Terry Pratchett
“Do not go gentle into that good night. Rage, rage against the dying of the light.” Dylan Thomas
“I cannot fix on the hour, or the spot, or the look, or the words, which laid the foundation.  It is too long ago.  I was in the middle before I knew that I had begun.”
29. YouTube or Netflix: Youtube
30. Harry Potter or Percy Jackson: Harry Potter. That series was my childhood. Plus I was jokingly known as Mrs Weasley at uni because I have a collection of woolen jumpers and had a habit of adopting college children.
31. When You Feel Accomplished: When I finish writing something, get to the end of a long walk, when I pull off a particularly awesome bit of role-playing in my D&D group.
32. Star Wars or Star Trek: Star Trek
33. Paperback Books or Hardback Books: Hardback books - I collect nice editions of my favourite books
34. Handwriting or Typing: typing
35. Velvet or Satin: Satin
36. Video Games or Movies: Movies
37. Would you rather be the dragon or own the dragon? A pet dragon would be awesome. I made this happen in my D&D game and at the end of our campaign, he got brutally murdered by the big bad. I was heartbroken. RIP Fluffy. He had the disposition of a playful puppy, except when people were trying to kill my cleric, then their combined firepower was one of the most deadly things our party had to offer.
38. Sunrise or sunset: Sunset
39. What’s your favourite song? This varies a lot, but at the moment it’s the music from “Groundhog Day the musical”, specifically “If I had my time again”
40. Horror Movies yes or no: Nope, I’m a massive wuss
41. Long hair or short hair: Long hair
42. Opera or Theatre: Theatre. It’s the family joke that I do my best to keep London theatreland in business with the amount of shows I go to.
43: Assuming the multiverse theory is true and every story ever told has really happened somewhere, which one of the movie/book/tv show/game/etc worlds would you pick to travel to first?
Probably Critical Role? Mostly because a) Vox Machina would be the most awesome set of people to hang out with and b) they live in a world with DRAGONS and ADVENTURE. (Yeah, there’s a bit of a theme in my responses here).
Now who to tag... I’m gonna go with @nerdylittleshit, @acksherley, @unforth-ninawaters, @angelofthemoor, @disizletzi, @diminuel and anyone else who wants a go!
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