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#steve cries into his shield with longing
giorno-plays-piano · 8 months
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Hold On To Me
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Pairing: mob!Steve Rogers x reader
Warnings: home intrusion, hostage situation, noncon, Stockholm Syndrome, smut.
Words: 3.9k
Summary: Swallowing a lump in your throat, you grow silent, anxiously watching the guy smile at you. He's that type every girl would be eyeing in the club, looking for an excuse to talk to him, to attract his attention, and then, very likely, to get him into bed. Steve seems popular, the I-will-eat-your-heart-like-cereals type, but you can say he isn't. Something in his eyes betrays his nature.
P.S. I rewatched The Hostage again (when I did it for the first time, this was the result), and here we are.
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Staring at a little black Ikea table as if your life depends on it, you sit, your body aching from being in one position for too long, but you can't move. He's watching you. It seems he doesn't even blink, his eyes on you since the moment he pushed you into your room and locked the door behind him. He's so close you can hear him breathing.
You know this look. You're not that young and innocent to be unable to recognize interest in man's eyes. It both scares and - unfortunately - makes you a little flushed, and you berate yourself for the latter because this isn't the right way to react to a man who broke into your house and took your family hostage. God knows what's happening to your stepfather right now: the man wouldn't be able to protect himself even if he was inside a tank, and his enemy attacked him with a plastic knife. You're as much worried about your little brother. He was always a bit of a brat, but the second you realized he was in danger, you felt so overprotective over him you covered his body with yours like you were a shield.
Your brother is in his room now, being watched by the youngest guy in the gang, the one who looked the most reluctant when their leader decided to take hostages. Your brother must be safe. The other kid won't hurt him, you don't think.
You, on the other hand, are stuck with Steve. From the moment you saw him move and heard him talk, you realized he was running the show behind the curtains. He's dangerous. The third guy, the one who claims to be the leader, is impulsive, angry, shouting and kicking things, sweating like a sinner in church because of the police cars surrounding the house, but Steve is calm and collected. He smiles with his perfectly white teeth and talks to the boys as if he's relaxing in a bar after work, not in the middle of armed robbery.
He's really, really pretty. Steve has perfectly blond hair and proper facial features like a slightly chiseled jaw, full lips, and that sort of blue eyes that make girls swoon over him the moment they see him. He's perfectly tall, well-built, with wide shoulders and strong, muscular arms and legs: he look like he belongs in those Armani commercials or, perhaps, on the catwalk, but not with the kind of guys your mother warned you about. How did he end up on the darkside? What made him so good at using a gun? He didn't fire it even once yet, but you see it from the way he handles it he knows too well what to do with it. It makes you anxious, thinking that he might point his gun at you and then pull the trigger.
Except he won't. Or, it's rather unlikely. Not when he looks at you like this, always moving so close to you he steals a touch whenever he can as if he is unable to help himself. Besides, Steve is kind to you: he gave you water when you asked and loosened the rope tied too tightly around your wrists; he brought you a pillow so you could rest against it, not the cold wall, and shushed you gently when you cried, saying he wouldn't let anything happen to you or your little brother. You don't know how much of his promises are true, but you think him unlikely to harm a child. He doesn't seem the type.
Your poor little boy. He's only a kid, all alone in his room, forced to face one of his kidnappers as he waits for the police to finally make a move. Since you don't hear him crying - your room is just below his - you think he does his absolute best to hold on, to keep calm and not irritate his unwilling jailer even though he's frightened to death. He doesn't deserve to be caught up in this mess. If only they agreed to let him go... Not that anyone would listen to your pleas, though. He's a valuable hostage, just like you. As long as the gang has you, police won't make a move, you're pretty sure.
But maybe you can still help your brother. Ease his worry a little, give him a bit of hope. That is, if you play your cards right and press the right buttons of your handsome, terrifying warden.
"May I bring some food to my brother, please?" You whisper, gathering all your courage to turn your head to face Steve, look him straight in the eyes. "He must be so hungry."
Swallowing a lump in your throat, you grow silent, anxiously watching the guy smile at you. He's that type every girl would be eyeing in the club, looking for an excuse to talk to him, to attract his attention, and then, very likely, to get him into bed. Steve seems popular, the I-will-eat-your-heart-like-cereals type, but you can say he isn't. Something in his eyes betrays his nature.
He's not a guy winning girls over with his looks. Steve is a deviant, an outcast. His face can't buy him what he wants, and that's why he's here, in your house, holding your family hostage.
Maybe, just maybe, you can use it to your advantage.
"Can you do me a favor, please?" Your whisper is barely audible. "Can you take me to my brother so I could feed him? If you want, you can tie my legs so I won't run."
Not that you would, anyway. You know perfectly well you can't outrun this guy even if your life depends on it, literally. Overpowering him is even more unlikely unless his muscles are just cotton stuffed in his clothes, which is a ridiculous suggestion.
His eyes light up at the word favor. "Happy to oblige," he muses, and your heart starts beating wildly before he continues, "but how will you return my favor?"
You are puzzled. You haven't thought this far. Dumbly, you thought he'd just say yes. It's a small favor, really. He knew you wouldn't give him any trouble, so it was just quickly checking up on your scared to death brother. Why would he want something from you in return when you couldn't as much as move without his permission?
But of course, he would.
"Anything," you blurt out hurriedly as if the words burn your tongue before you realize what you are actually saying.
Steve laughs with delight, his features softening.
"You should work on your negotiation skills," he declares with a wide smile as you tremble, understanding what you just offered. "You shouldn't give up your everything because people will take anything there is to take. Choose just one thing at a time, and choose carefully."
Suddenly, he gets close, and you immediately avert your eyes to the floor, unable to keep his gaze, trembling.
He nuzzles your cheek affectionately as his knife works through the rope around your wrists, and you pray he isn't going to stab you because you really know nothing and all judgements you made of him might be false. "But I'll be nice and choose just one thing for you. You'll feed your brother, and then I'll feed you, alright?"
You blink, your eyes on your warden again. Feed you? He wants to give you food?
Okay, it sounds strange. But who cares when you can finally see your brother? You'd say yes even if he proposed something improper because what else can you do? Steve has a gun, and even without it, you feel like he's a very dangerous person to oppose to.
So you say yes, and he takes your hand in his - so you won't be nervous, he says, but you know he wants to remind you who's in control - and then you two march to the kitchen in awkward silence where you grab whatever you can find. A cheeseburger from that little family café your family goes to every weekend, a pack of yogurt, a toast, a bottle of water... Steve even helps you to carry it all.
When he opens the door to your brother's room, you forget how to breathe for a second. The little boy is safe, sitting on his bed with his hands already untied, his eyes red from all the crying, and you rush to him, forgetting there's another man in the room. Or, well, a boy, because he's surely younger than you, perhaps still at school. His eyes are suspiciously red, too, as if he's scared and doesn't want anything but leave this place for good. For a moment you think it'd be better if he was guarding you, too, because then, perhaps, he'd agree to let you go if you helped him run away from the house without police catching him, and then things would be so much easier.
But the boy leaves in a hurry when Steve enters, and you remember who's a true ringleader. You can never escape on your own.
Your brother cries when you hug him, his little hands wrapped around you as he sniffle, and you rock back and forth to calm him down, whispering words of comfort, like everything's going to be alright even if you don't know where your stepdad is and what Steve is going to do to you if police doesn't do what he demands them to. You tell your brother he needs to eat because it's dinner time, and he nods, suddenly a well-behaved boy he'd never been, and takes a cheeseburger. You don't leave until he eats everything even if it's probably too much for a kid his size, but he says nothing, and you want him to be completely full: who knows when he'll eat again.
Then you give him a hug. It'll be fine, you say, and he does his best not to cry. Just do what they say, be a good boy, and everything's gonna be alright.
Steve smiles at the child when your brother doesn't want to let you go. "Listen to your sister," he says in a tone as if he's playing the role of a big brother, "and things will be fine. She'll be safe, too."
You don't think you'll be safe, not with someone like Steve, but perhaps your brother will be because his jailer is a kind kid, and he isn't cut out for violence. It's enough for you, even if your hair stands on end when Steve gently nudges you into your room, locking the door behind himself again. Once you two are completely alone, you start to panic, your breathing growing uneven, your hands shaking. What will he do to you? Will he rape you? Torture you? Kill you? If you could think rationally, you'd realize at least the last two are unlikely to happen, but you're a hostage, and he has the power to do any of these things. Even if you're unbound, you're helpless against him, a man so big and strong he'd overpower you in a matter of seconds.
So you don't try anything. You go sit down on the floor near your bed with a pillow resting between your back and the wall and then stretch out your arms for Steve to bind them again. He doesn't.
"You've been a good girl so far," he muses, sitting down in front of you, and then you see a couple of fruits in his hands that you somehow missed completely. "Now, let me feed you."
You still when he takes out his knife and peels a big red apple in a single strip before cutting it into even pieces. When he brings one close to you, you try to take it from his hands, but he tuts, tilting his head. "Open your mouth," he says simply instead, and your face grows hot.
Of course, there was a catch. There always is with guys like him.
But you say nothing and do as he says, and then he carefully pushes a piece of apple into your mouth. It's delicious, juicy, just your favorite sort of apples. You try to concentrate on the taste, not Steve's delighted expression when he watches you eat. Soon, he pushes one more piece past your lips, and then one more, and one more until there's nothing left of the apple. He's nowhere near finished, of course, because then starts to peel an orange. It's messier than the apple, but Steve doesn't seem to mind when he brings a slice close to your lips and lets you swallow it. His smile grows wider the closer you are to finishing the orange.
When you're finally done, your mouth full of acidic flavor, he suddenly clicks his tongue.
"My hand is all dirty from orange's juice," he says, eyeing you when you finally register what it is he asks you to do.
You bite down on your lips, eyes round as he brings his hand to your mouth.
"Lick it," he whispers so close to your face you can feel his breath on your skin.
You want to say no, to tell him he's out of his mind, but you don't. He's been kind to you so far, and it'd be stupid to provoke him. Even if he won't stop at this... maybe he'll stay kind, anyway. It's better than having him put a gun against your forehead for refusing to do what he says.
You open your mouth, taking his fingers in one at a time. They taste almost the same as the orange, sticky with juice, and you do your best to lick them clean, making shameless little noises when you suck at them. Steve doesn't seem to mind. On the contrary, he looks at you with a delightful expression on his face, like he's happy you're so good at whatever he asks you to do. He slips finger after finger inside your warm, wet mouth, playing with your tongue, smearing juice and saliva against it as he laughs with joy.
When you're done, he kisses you, sharing the sour taste of the fruit.
You knew it would come to this. It's no surprise, really, with the way he looks at you. But you still tremble and wish for all of it to end when Steve licks your tongue, sucking it into his mouth.
"Open your legs, baby," he commands in a sweet voice, and you shudder but do as he says anyway, and his lips part in a smile. "Yeah, like that."
His hand is already between your thighs, cupping your pussy through the clothes, and you freeze, blood pounding in your ears. It feels surreal, being in this situation, in the hands of someone who might make you cum or shoot you in the head instead. Your heart beats wildly in your chest, but your body is petrified, limbs turning to stone, your tongue heavy when you whisper. "Please, don't hurt me."
It's a plea, a cry, and tears slip down your cheeks as you look him in the face, his eyes dark and perceptive. Then, all of a sudden, he softens. "You're safe with me," he promises, his breath warming your face as his hand lands on your head, stroking you gently like a little girl, and you feel like you're going to cry from the intimacy of his touch. "You'll always be safe with me."
His other hand is already in your jeans, caressing you through the silk fabric of your panties, but as he pats your head, taking your hair away from your face, you lean into him, seeking any comfort he's willing to give. Steve purrs, landing a kiss to your brow, his fingers slowly spreading your gentle folds as you shudder. "Good girl."
You let out a shaky sigh as he circles your clit: surprisingly, he doesn't start pumping his fingers in and out like most guys do, too eager to have their dick inside. No, Steve just draws more sighs from you, makes you meek and pliant and wet as his fingers work your clit just the right way, and you squirm into the fabric of his t-shirt as he caresses the back of your head, pressing you into his chest.
It almost doesn't feel like he's forcing himself on you. It feels like... like he comforts you. As if he wants you to feel good, to be fine with him doing it to you.
"I'm... I'm-"
Your knees tremble as you sense the orgasm coming too soon, snuggling against your captor as his hand closes against your shoulders, his fingers working your clit even faster, circling, pinching, pressing on it like a button, making you squeeze your eyes shut. The coil tightens in your belly and, then, then... you become undone. Disintegrate in Steve's hands when he praises you tenderly for being good to him, kisses your cheeks wet from tears, and craddle you to his chest like a baby. He's painfully hard, you can feel it through his jeans when you lean onto him, but Steve doesn't seem in a hurry for his own release. He waits till your orgasm makes you all too soft and takes your face in his hand, giving you a deep kiss, his tongue coiling around yours.
You barely recognize when he lifts you up, feeling too comfortable and warm, pressed to him like that, but then you feel cool bedsheets behind your back, and then you're scared again.
Steve coes tenderly, giving you a peck on the lips, "Do you want to ride me, baby? Or do you want me to take you on your back, like a princess?"
The way he phrases it makes warmth creep into your cheeks, and you avert your eyes, mumbling, "On my back, please."
It doesn't even register that he forces himself on you right this minute. It feels like... something else. Something not so scary, not so violent. Something... tender.
"Like a princess, then," your captor smiles, hands trailing your jeans as he carefully slides them down, taking them away, living you half naked. "Alright. You'll be my princess."
Your face feels disturbingly hot when he says it, his hands on you as he tugs the fabric of your blouse up, lowering his head to drop a few kisses to your tummy, murmuring something you don't quite catch, his breath hot against your skin. Soon, you are completely naked in front of him, and you'd feel ashamed if he wouldn't caress your head again like you're a little girl, eager for his praise.
He gives you a kiss before inching away, taking his t-shirt off ever so slowly to give you a good look at his undoubtedly perfect body. But you don't look at his muscled arms or wide chest. Your eyes are trailing his scars, so many scars of different shapes and sizes that cover his skin. Many of them are long, undoubtedly deep, as if someone... as if someone stabbed Steve with a knife.
Your eyes water. Even if it's you who's a victim, a hostage, you feel a sharp sense of guilt as if it were you who hurt him.
He blinkes, a little surprised, perhaps, but you can see there's someone else in his eyes. Something like shame. Like self-loathing.
"A princess' knight is supposed to have a few scars here and there, right?" He gives a quiet laugh, getting down again to cage you with his body, but he freezes when your warm hand lands on a long, ugly line on his side, between the ribs. It is long healed, but the touch makes him stop, nonetheless.
You look him into the eyes, and your face is tight with worry. "I'm sorry," you whisper like it's your fault, your palm warming his skin, and Steve becomes alive again under your touch, his lips partying in a smile once more.
His hand caresses your nipple, pinching it between two fingers as he draws a breath from you, watching you intently, his hard, leaking cock heavy on your tummy. Then, suddenly remembering something, he bends over to grab something from his jeans, and you realize he's putting on a condom. You sigh in relief, and he catches that.
"Anything for a princess," he grins, sliding his hand over your thigh, and you still beneath him when he positions himself at your entrance.
You're scared. That moment you're back into your room, with a man who can shoot you hovering above you like a monster eager to eat you alive, and you forget how to breathe. You're not a princess in the care of your faithful knight. You're a hostage, and your captor can do anything he wants with you.
Steve feels the change in you in a moment, and he stops, his hand back to the top of your head. Even though you can feel how painfully hard he is, he waits, caressing you like a little girl, smiling to you, tenderly brushing your hair away from your face, repeating you'll always be safe with him. And then you're a princess again, and he's your knight.
He pushes into you, and you bit down on your lip, trying to relax: he's not monstrous, but Steve is still a bit too big for you to take him comfortably. Thankfully, he doesn't split you on his cock, giving you time to adjust, and with every moment the subtle pain grows weaker before it finally lets go, and you nudge your warden gently, your hands gripping his shoulder and your face in the crook of his neck. It doesn't hurt anymore. It almost feels good to be so full of him, to know what it's like to have him inside of you.
Steve says it's hard not to cum when you clamp down on him so much, gripping him like a vice. Pleasure softens his features, and you brush a strand of blond hair away from his face before you even register what you do. He does, though, and he likes it. He finally starts to move.
Sweat drips down your bodies when Steve keeps slamming inside of you, making all sorts of soft noises while you pant and choke beneath him, snuggling against his form, your legs wrapped around him tightly. His cock is pressing against every right spot of yours, making you forget who he is and what he does to you. You're his princess, his good girl, he repeats over and over again, and you feel safe in his embrace, inhaling his scent, taking his cock till its head presses into your cervix, leaving a pleasant ache and making you whine. It feels good to be in his care when he rolls to the side and presses your head to his chest, his other hand lifting your leg to reach a different angle, and you kiss his jaw, his neck, making it even harder to hold on, he says.
When he cums, you're already far too gone. The pleasure is too intense, and for a couple of minutes you say nothing to each other, panting, his hands still on the back of your head as he caresses you absent-mindedly, your bed a mess of damp and crinkled sheets. You wish to stop thinking. To forget everything. Just being here, being safe, is enough for now.
Until he speaks again.
"You'll come with me," he whispers feverishly, his hot palm on your cheek, almost burning you. "I'll take you away, and we'll go on a big adventure together, princess. With dragons, swords, and gold."
You're quiet against him, staring into his chest as he caresses your head.
You're not a princess. You're a prey.
___________
Tags: ​@finleyjayne @helenaeisenhower @inlovewiththefictionalcharacters @rosalynshields @lookiamtrying @soleil-dor @cosicas-cuquis @buckybarnesplumwhore @lux-ravenwolf @stupendouslovegardener @what-is-your-wish @eralen @magnificantmermaid @typewritersworld @stcrrjoon @sweetxime @imrandomstuffsblog @gachawipes133
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never--doubt · 1 month
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Meant It
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Summary: Bucky has been pining over Reader, trying to hint at it, but she’s not getting it. Only a kiss can make her believe fully.
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female!Reader 
Words: 1,600
Warnings: nerves, mutual pining, Natasha meddles
A/N: thank you to @lassie-bird for beta reading and helping me with this!
This is my February story for my Year of Types of Kisses! I am doing a year long challenge focusing on just different kinds of kisses: you can find the masterlist here!
Feedback fuels me!
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You moved down the hall, furrowing your eyebrows as you stared at the list on your pad. “I swear, SHIELD does not understand what we do,” you muttered, turning around a corner out of memory. 
“There’s my favorite girl.”
Your gaze shot up immediately, smiling as you spied Bucky moving towards you. “Hi there,” you replied, pausing as he moved to your side, both of you continuing down the hall. “What are you up to?”
“Trying to bide time until the celebration later,” he chuckled, sliding his hands into his pockets. Glancing at you, he stated, “You look busy, though.”
You sighed, rolling your eyes. “More than I’d like. There are a lot of issues I’m apparently suppose to solve.”
“Well…can I help?”
You fought back a blush, waving him off. “Oh, I’ll be fine. You have enough to worry about without helping me with all this stuff.”
“I’m offering, doll,” Bucky stated, his gaze locked onto you. “Besides, isn’t work more fun with someone else to help?”
“Ah…I’ll be fine,” you insisted, feeling like your heart was going to beat out of your chest. Taking a step away as the hall forked, you smiled up at him. “I’ll see you at the party?”
He paused, nodding as you backed away from him. “…Yeah. See you there.”
Turning your back to him, you let out a breath and clutched the pad to your chest. You hated the effect he had on you, how you couldn’t help but smile, how your cheeks heated almost immediately. Why was it so hard to get over this little crush?
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Bucky let his fingers run along the ridges in the glass he was holding, mindlessly doing so as his gaze was focused across the room. He couldn’t help it: she was there, laughing with Tony as the man waved his arms, probably telling some dramatic tale.
She was beautiful. Well, she always was, but tonight was…different. She was dressed up, wearing a striking outfit, and the makeup she had put on was different than she normally did. He couldn’t take his eyes off of her.
“You’re staring.”
Bucky looked away from her, glaring at Steve. “You don’t need to remind me,” he muttered, taking a sip of the drink.
Steve chuckled, tilting his head as his blue eyes focused on his closest friends. “Haven’t you been getting closer to her?”
“Trying,” he sighed, glancing at her out of instinct. “I don’t want to just outright tell her how I feel, what if she doesn’t feel the same?”
“Well, that’s easily managed.” 
Both men looked over as Nat approached them, smiling softly. 
“What is?” Steve asked.
“Seeing if she feels the same,” the red head responded, shrugging and swirling the glass of wine in her hand. 
He sighed softly, leveling her with a stare. “Natasha.”
“I’m a spy, Barnes,” she interrupted, already walking away. “Trust me, otherwise you’ll worry too much.”
“Nat!” he cried, trying to get her to come back, but she was already across the room. Cursing softly, took a long drink from his glass, feeling Steve pat his shoulder. 
“It’ll be fine.”
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“There you are.”
You turned and smiled as Nat slid towards you, your friend smiling back. “I was wondering when you’d find me,” you teased. 
“Tylers!” Tony cried, waving his hand as he saw someone. Turning to you, he said, “I’ve got to catch him, you stay right here.”
You rolled your eyes with a smile, turning to Natasha as he darted off. “Tony saw him twenty minutes ago but didn’t want to leave me alone,” you stated. 
She laughed, sliding her arm through yours. “So, how is…your goal working?”
You sighed, sipping your cocktail. You knew what she was talking about, there was nothing else she could be talking about: trying to squash your crush on a certain Winter Soldier. 
“I’m utterly failing,” you murmured. 
“And what’s wrong with that?” your friend shot back, tilting her head. 
Scoffing, you glared softly at her. “He could never like me, Nat.”
“You don’t know that,” she responded. The glint in her eyes was a mischievous one, the kind of shine where it was clear the other knew something you didn’t. 
“And why do you say that?” you said, narrowing your eyes at her. “What do you know, Nat?”
“Enough,” she winked, pulling you along as she moved to the bar. “But for now, let’s get you a another drink.”
“I haven’t even finished this one!”
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“Heading home?”
You looked away from your coat, feeling your heart skip a beat as you met Bucky’s eyes. His hands were in his pockets, his stance almost shy, unsure. But god, if he didn’t look even more handsome dressed up, his light blue shirt making his eyes pop. 
You swallowed the lump in your throat, nodding as you held your coat close. “Yeah. Is it winding down or up without me?”
He chuckled, taking a step closer to you. “Tony was making it chaotic, as usuall.”
You smiled softly, sliding your coat on. “Then I’m leaving at the perfect time.”
“Let me walk you back,” Bucky said, glancing outside briefly.
“You don’t have to, I-”
“I want to,” he insisted, his tone firm. “It’s dark out, and I want you to be safe.”
Your breath froze at his words, meeting his gaze. “And…why is that?” you whispered, feeling hope rise in you. Maybe the hope had started with Nat’s comments, but it had only been a small pile of embers, and his words only fanned the flame.
Bucky tilted his head, taking another step closer to you. He was only two or so feet away from you now, the lack of distance making your heart rate pick up. “Because I…I’m falling in love with you,” he stated, his response barely loud enough to be heard over the running fountain behind him. 
You froze entirely, letting your gaze flicker over his face. This…couldn’t be real. No. He couldn’t feel this way about you, could he?
Swallowing the lump in your throat, you shook your head with a forced laugh. “You don’t-you can’t mean that,” you responded. You broke the eye-contact, pulling your coat tighter around you. 
“Y/N-”
“I’m going to go, the fresh air will be nice after those drinks,” you rushed, moving towards the door. “Goodnight.”
You gasped softly as the cold night air hit you, pushing yourself down the sidewalk as quickly as you could in heels. What he told you wasn’t real, it had to be a lie of some sort. Or was a lie worse? You couldn’t decide, it was all too much. Your mind was racing and you couldn’t think straight at all. Were you even going the right direction to your apartment?
“Y/N!”
You blinked away tears, hearing him yell your name behind you. “Please, Bucky, don’t-”
He jogged in front of you, stopping and making you pause. “Please, just listen, doll.”
You kept your gaze focused on his chest, away from his pleading eyes. You knew the second you met his gaze, you would break, and that was something you didn’t want to see. “H-however you found out about my feelings, please d-don’t toy with me,” you stuttered out, your voice shaking more than your body felt like it was. 
“I’m not toying with you,” he insisted, stepping closer again. “I meant it.”
You shook your head, gripping your coat tightly. “No, y-you couldn’t feel that way about me.”
“About the most beautiful girl in the world?” Bucky asked. “About one of the sweetest, kindest souls I’ve ever met?”
You shook your head, blinking away tears that threatened to grow at his words. You still couldn’t believe it, believe this was real. 
You could see him take another step forward, and his hand reached out, cupping your cheek. He tilted your chin up, making you meet his gaze. “I started falling for you months ago,” he muttered softly, his eyes shining with honesty. “I’ve been falling for weeks, and every day when I think I couldn’t fall deeper, you smile at me and look at me with your beautiful eyes, and I keep falling in ways I couldn’t imagine.”
“…please tell me this isn’t a dream,” you whispered, feeling a tear streak down your cheek and onto his hand. 
“I swear it’s real,” he responded softly, before leaning in and kissing you. 
Your eyes fluttered shut at the soft kiss, gentle and slow, as if he didn’t want to shock you by the touch. Slowly, you kissed him back, letting go of your own jacket to hold his own, pulling you both closer together. 
You could feel his arm wrap around you as the kiss deepened, showing you that he meant it. It was as if he was giving you a chance to see all the emotions in him, all the love and ache for you. And you…had to show him that you felt the same. Your heart nearly wanted to burst from happiness, knowing this was real, he loved you too. 
Eventually, to your dismay, the kiss ended, both of you catching your breaths as you held onto the other. Bucky smiled, a smile you hadn’t seen before, so full of joy and love as he stared down at you. No words were said as you blushed, smiling back softly. 
He let his forehead rest against yours, taking a breath, as if to remind himself that this was real too. “…told you I meant it,” he muttered. 
You laughed softly, nudging your nose against his. “I love you too….you stubborn man.”
“Your stubborn man,” he corrected.
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roanniom · 2 years
Text
The Shift
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Steve Harrington x Reader
Word Count: 6.6k
Read Part 2 Here
Summary: On a sweltering shift at family video, Steve Harrington gets on your nerves.
Warnings: NSFW, 18+ ONLY, Smut, fingering, dirty talk, grinding, PIV sex, semi-public sex, light degradation, enemies to lovers, slight period-correct sexism and homophobia from a customer
It’s positively sweltering inside Family Video today. The box fan on the front counter does absolutely nothing to cool you down, especially as the tension within you runs hotter than the outside sun itself. 
You shouldn’t be here. Today was your day off and you’d had plans with your friends for a pool day to beat the heat, knowing that today was forecasted to be the hottest of the year so far. Instead, you’ve been roped in to cover for Robin. And as much as you love her, part of you kinda secretly hopes she chokes on the milkshake she’s probably enjoying on her date right about now. 
You don’t really want her to choke of course. You’ve been hyping her up for her eventual first date with Vicki for a long time now. It warms your cold, dead, perennially single heart to see your friend getting something she’s really wanted. Something she never thought would happen for her, especially not in Hawkins, Indiana. 
But Hawkins, Indiana is exactly where you wish you weren’t right now. You’d rather be somewhere cool. Somewhere with ice and a breeze and fresh air. 
Somewhere without Steve Harrington. 
“You’ve been hogging the fan all day, trainee. Come on, give another sweaty bastard a turn.”
Speak of the devil.
You turn and glare directly into the face of your nemesis. Okay, nemesis is a little bit of an exaggeration. You aren’t mortal enemies, perhaps, but you would love to smack his smug face. Just once. 
“For the last time. Stop calling me that. I have been working here almost as long as you,” you huff, not bothering to move an inch out of the radius of the fan.
“That doesn’t change the fact that I am the one who trained you. Making you - eternally - my trainee,” Steve responds, elbowing his way around you and into the line of semi-cool air. 
“I was literally hired a month after you.” 
“Doesn’t change the fact that I showed you the ropes.”
“Only because the manager spent the night passed out in the ditch behind the liquor store.” You finish reboxing your last rewound tape, clicking it closed with a definitive snap.
“Hey. Jessie’s doing really well in rehab these days. Give him a break.” Steve pulls the stocking cart up and around to the counter and reaches for the tapes you’d just stacked. You yank them away from his grasp and haul them over to the cart yourself.
“And by ‘showed you the ropes’ are you referring to the fact that you broke the label maker in front of me and taught me how to get free snacks out of the break room vending machine?” You start pushing the cart towards the comedy section, not bothering to wait for Steve’s response.
“Hey! You should be thanking me for every bag of Reese’s Pieces I see you scarfing each day.” Steve comes up jogging behind you, grabbing the copy of Weird Science out of your hand before you can shelve it.
“Shut up, Harrington. As if you aren’t slamming M&M’s by the bushel.” You try to reach for the tape but he holds it up out of your reach. Damn his stupid height. 
“Don’t you dare act like M&M’s aren’t the superior candy.” 
“They melt in your hand - ,”
“So do Reese’s Pieces!” Steve cries out, interrupting you. 
“Oh, I’m sorry, Steve. I forgot that a handful of goopy M&M’s are what helped E.T. assimilate to this planet,” you say, rolling your eyes and abandoning Weird Science to his grasp. Let him shelve the damn thing. You move on to the next aisle. 
Steve, of course, follows behind. 
“You and that stupid little alien.” Which of course makes you round on him, to which he throws Weird Science up in front of himself as a shield. 
“E.T. is a seminal piece of filmmaking and Spielberg’s best work to date, so don’t you get started again -,”
“Oh bullshit. His best work?” Steve’s brow is furrowed darkly as if you’ve committed some irredeemable act instead of simply disagreeing with his film opinions. 
“Um, excuse me? A little help here?” The voice of Ms. Jenkins, elderly and snippy, issues from the front counter where she stands with a handful of tapes. You give Steve a mean look and bound over to your solitary customer. 
“Yes of course, let me ring you up, ma’am,” you say sweetly, making quick work of checking to make sure the tapes are rewound before scanning and reading off the total to her. You always have to double check that tapes are rewound because you sure as hell can’t be certain that Steve has done his job when that particular chore is on his list of responsibilities. 
By the time Ms. Jenkins is out the door with her rentals, Steve’s pushed the cart to the shelves closest to the counter, lazily fingering the spines of the horror tapes in a bored pursuit of a particular alphabetic location. 
“Jaws.”
“I’m sorry?”
“I said Jaws.”
“What about Jaws?” you ask with a sigh, leaning your hip against the counter and crossing your arms. 
“Spielberg’s best movie.”
“Grow up, Harrington.”
“Excuse me?!” Steve drops the tape he’s holding and rushes over to you with fists raised. “Are you suggesting there’s something childish about enjoying Jaws?”
“Maybe,” you shrug, noncommittal. You don’t actually believe that, you just have found yourself in this rhetorical hole with Steve before and you don’t really want to get into an actual discussion. That and you love riling him up. It’s easier than committing to a movie to pop into the vcr above the counter and just as entertaining. 
“You…I just…ughh.” Steve seems at a loss for words as he grapples with your vague criticism as if it isn’t the thousandth time you’ve had this argument. “That movie is a mature, grown up cinematic masterpiece and I can prove it. Number one,” he holds up one finger. “It is gory as hell. There’s a fuck ton of blood.”
“Violence is your evidence of maturity, Harrington?”
Steve scoffs at you and lifts up a second finger. 
“Number two, the score is iconic.” He hunches a little and starts stalking towards you slowly, predatorily. “Duuun uh, duuun uh,  dun uh dun uh dun uh - ,”
“I know the score, Steve!” you speak over his crescendoing vocalization. 
“Come on! That’s iconic!” You roll your eyes but nod. 
“I mean yeah. You got me there.”
“Ahah!” Steve punches the air as if he’s one some massive victory rather than simply receiving your noncommittal agreement on one part of a larger argument. He holds up a third finger. “And to round us out with number three - tits.”
Exactly as he says ‘tits’ - proudly and loudly, you notice - an elderly gentleman walks into the store. He freezes in the doorway looking at the two of you, clearly affronted. 
“Good afternoon, sir! Let us know if you need any help!” you hastily speak up, distancing yourself from Steve and plastering on a huge smile. The man harumphs and walks into the store, grumbling something about ‘kids these days.’ You turn and shoot daggers at a sheepish looking Steve.
“Tits? Really?” Your whisper comes out poisonous.
“What’s more mature than tits?” he asks, equally hushed. 
“Obviously not you, moron.” You start making your way back to the cart but stop in your tracks, thinking. Instead, you turn back and whisper to him. “Wait…when are there tits in Jaws?”
~*~ 
Ten minutes later, after the disapproving customer had checked out, copy of Cocoon in hand (a little on the nose, something you tried not to laugh about as you rang him up), you and Steve both stand huddled near the tv hooked up to the VCR. 
You’re watching the opening sequence, where two teens are giving each other eyes across the way at a bonfire party. It’s charged. It’s flirtatious. The girl gets up and heads towards the beach, the guy following in hot, drunken pursuit. 
It’s a cute moment. A calm before the storm, you think, because of course you know better. You know what’s going to happen in just a few moments. But suspended in time, this couple’s cat and mouse game is sexy. It’s playful. 
It’s not the point of the scene, but you  feel yourself getting riled up. Not exactly turned on but…what’s the word? Yearning? Pathetic. It’s been a little too long since you’ve gotten any and the heat is getting you your head, you reason with yourself internally. 
As the girl gets closer to the water she begins discarding her clothes in preparation for what everyone knows will be her final skinny dip. As she does so, Steve hurtles forward and hits the pause button, freezing her perfectly in time as her shirt comes over her head revealing the silhouette of heavy breasts, mid swing. 
“Tits!” Steve cries out, pointing directly at the revealed breasts on screen. “I fucking told you.”
“What do you want, Steve? A cookie?” You make sure your face stays neutral. You don’t want to give away the fact that the sexual implications of the scene have you all hot and bothered. Harrington doesn’t deserve that information. 
“You said there weren’t any tits in Jaws.”
“I asked when were there tits in Jaws. I apologize that a pair of movie breasts didn’t imprint chemically in my brain the way they did for you.” 
“I’m sorry. When did the prude switch shifts with the trainee? I didn’t get the memo.” Steve says haughtily, ejecting the tape from the VCR and putting it back in its case. Your jaw drops at his words but he pays you no mind, walking back to reshelf the movie. You run after him. 
“I’m not a fucking prude, Harrington.” 
“Oh I know you’re not. That’s what I’m getting at.” Steve slots Jaws back in its place and heads back towards the break room. 
“And what is that supposed to mean?” you demand, hot on his trail. 
“I’m at the same parties you go to, trainee. I’m not blind. You like to have a good time.” He shrugs, walking up to the beaten old vending machine. It’s much hotter here in the back room than it was out on the main floor, probably due to the lack of windows and fans. Steve kicks the corner of the vending machine and raps his knuckles against the side panel before reaching to type the code for the M&M’s. You lunge forward and beat him to it, slamming your finger down on a different button. “Fuck! Seriously?!” 
“You’re really going to slut shame me? Here at work?” You ask, snatching the packet of Reese’s Pieces as it falls into the dispenser tray. 
“The pot is very much calling the kettle black here, don’t you think?” Steve kicks the corner of the machine and taps the side again, but instead of beeping in recognition, the machine stays dormant. You pop a candy in your mouth smugly as Steve grunts in frustration. 
“I’m not the whore of Hawkins, Harrington. But that might be a title with which you can identify.” 
“Nice alliteration, brainiac.” Steve kicks the machine harder this time. Clearly with more malicious intent towards the hulking appliance rather than with the strategy of overriding the payment mechanism. 
“You know about alliteration? You didn’t skip that lesson in English class to fondle a bimbo under the bleachers?” You pop another candy in your mouth and fan yourself. The heat is starting to get to you. It is suffocating in this room. Your collar is stuck to your neck and you grab at the front of your shirt, billowing it out to try and stimulate an internal breeze. You look up and find Steve staring at the place where your hand pulls at your clothes, but he’s quick to look away, shoving a hand through his messy hair. 
“Oh yeah? I’m not the one pushing my tits together whenever a slightly attractive guy comes in. I swear I saw you almost put your hand down the pants of that ex-football loser who came in here looking for fucking Flash Gordon for the tenth time.”
You gasp at his audacity. Because how dare he say that to you but also because it is objectively untrue. You had lightly flirted with the man, sure. You were bored and he had broad shoulders. Sue you. But Steve has no right to any sort of commentary. 
“I’m sorry Mr. This-way-to-the-romance-section-and-while-we’re-at-it-why-don’t-you-come-watch-it-at-my-place Harrington. A blonde with big boobs so much as thinks about walking in here and your eyes are popping out of your head and your tongue is trailing on the floor.”
“You’re using the description of a horny cartoon character to describe me? Nice. Real nice.” Steve bangs on the side of the machine with his fist one more time and you let out a groan. 
“Stop beating up the vending machine, for fuck’s sake. Here!” You reach into your pocket and grab a dollar, thrusting it into his face. Steve swats your hand away.
“I have money, trainee.” He reaches into his own pocket and fishes out a dollar which he proceeds to jam unceremoniously into the slot. 
You drop yourself into one of the seats at the lunch table and grab for a magazine to fan yourself with. 
“Well if you’re so loaded, why are you always stealing snacks?” 
Steve ignores you, punching in the correct code this time. When another packet of Reese’s Pieces drops instead of the M&Ms he’d asked for, he lets out massive cry of frustration. 
“What the fuck?”
“Well that’s the funniest thing I’ve seen all day,” you say, crossing your arms in your seat and biting your lip to keep from smiling widely. 
“What the FUCK!” 
“Maybe it’s karma, for being such an asshole to me,” you shrug. Steve whips around, shooting you daggers. 
“I’ve had it about up to here with you today, trainee.” He stalks over to the water cooler and rips out a little cone paper cup, accidentally pulling out three too many in the process. You continue fanning yourself with the magazine languidly. 
“Oh wow, I’m so sorry dad.”
Steve actually barks a laugh at that and looks at you over his shoulder, filling the paper cup with room temp water. 
“You’re not the first to make that association.”
“Oh gross, Harrington. I didn’t ask for insight into your sex life,” you pretend to gag. 
Steve knocks back the water and crushes the paper cone in his fist, tossing it over his shoulder as he goes to join you at the table. You are positively irked to notice that he makes it perfectly into the trash without even looking. 
“That’s not what I meant but I’m not opposed to being called daddy, fyi,” he says, winking at you. 
“I’m sure you’re not. Seems right up your alley.” Your words are derisive but you can’t help the breathless quality they take on. It must be a side effect of this fucking heat. You’re not taking in air properly. 
“Yeah? Well I’ll bet you’re really mean between the sheets.” 
“Oh you’ll bet that?” you ask with a snort, trying to ignore the paradoxical shiver that runs through your body at the implication. 
“Yeah. You seem to derive a sick pleasure from giving me a hard time. Wouldn’t be shocked if insults turn you on.” 
“Not a super fan of being degraded, Steve. Sorry to burst your bubble,” you reply lightly. Like his suggestion didn’t just add a palpitation to your heart beat. Steve bites his lip contemplatively. 
“Well I really meant that I think you like being the one to dish out the insults,” he clarifies. But then he’s leaning closer to you across the table, a smirk spreading across his face as he takes in the way your posture is scrunching defensively. “But actually now that I think of it…I feel like you probably would like being degraded.” 
“Excuse me?” you exhale sharply, realizing you’d been holding your breath as his proximity increased. 
“You’re a perfectionist. A good girl, or you are most of the time, as we’ve established.” Steve’s finger slides across the table towards you and your gaze locks on its approaching motion. “I could see you looking for an excuse to let go of all that pressure. To be bad.” 
You’ve stopped breathing again, mesmerized by his slow words and the trajectory of his sliding finger. Then suddenly he’s reaching out and snatching the half empty bag of Reese’s Pieces from your grasp, upending it in the air above his face and crunching down on the remaining candy. 
“Hey!” you cry out, lunging for him only to be stopped by his defensive hand outstretching and catching you, holding you an arm length away. Steve makes a face.
“It’s a crime that this is peanut butter instead of chocolate.”
You grab him by the front of the shirt and get very close to him, glaring up into his stupid, pretty face.
“You’ll pay for that, Steve Harrington.”
“Yeah? How?” he asks. His eyes are looking down into yours, the remnants of his smirk slowly fading from his face. The heat is sweltering. Hotter than it’s been during your entire shift and you really should run out the front door for some air before you pass out but…you’re rooted to the spot. 
You inhale in order to respond - not even sure of what you’ll say once the words start flowing - but you’re immediately interrupted by the ding of the bell on the front door. 
“Hello? Anybody here?”
The customer’s voice cuts through the tension between you and you let go of Steve’s shirt like it’s on fire. 
“Just a minute!” you call out in your sing-song-y customer service voice. You hear Steve groan behind you but you don’t give him a second thought as you dash out onto the floor of the store. 
The same grumpy man from earlier stands at the counter, grumpier than ever and brandishing his tape towards you. 
“I got all the way home just to realize that the wrong tape is in this blasted box.” He wrenches open the case for Cocoon to reveal a copy of Tootsie. You try not to laugh at his absurdly wounded expression and grab the tape from him.
“I am so sorry, sir, we’ll get this sorted for you,” you assure, turning around to let out a silent chuckle. You shuffle through the bare tapes on the counter and find the correct one, silently cursing Steve for his disorganization. 
“This is unacceptable, young lady,” the old man grumbles as you put the Cocoon tape in its box. 
“Everyone makes mistakes, unfortunately.”
“I expect a higher quality of service. I fought on D Day, you know.”
“We did not know that, thank you for your service,” Steve mumbles sarcastically coming up beside you behind the counter. The man doesn’t catch his facetiousness and wags a fervent finger.
“That’s right. I should be treated with some respect.”
“Without a doubt,” Steve replies. You silently snap the tape box closed and hand it over, trying not to look annoyed.But the man doesn’t take it from you. Instead he points over at the stack of tapes where you had placed the copy of Tootsie. 
“She tried to give me a movie with a man in a dress,” he accuses and you scoff. Steve glances over, clocking which movie it is and no doubt realizing that the mistake was his own. 
“Well, I’ll be honest with you, she was doing you a favor, because Dustin Hoffman is just a delight - ,”
“As her manager, I think you should fire her,” the man interrupts Steve. 
“Excuse me?” you ask, shocked at his audacity. Steve holds his hands up in a time out symbol. 
“First of all, I’m not her manager, and second of all. She’s done nothing wrong.”
“She gave me a fruity movie!” the man cries out. 
“Ok then,” you push away from the counter and head towards the back room, completely done with this interaction. 
“Sir, fruit is delicious,” Steve argues, distracted as he watches you stalk off to the back, anxious to follow. The old man wags his finger even more violently. 
“I’ll be telling the owner, just you wait. Do you take me for a fruit, young man?” he raises his voice.
“Yeah a raisin, sir. Please get out of my store.” Steve’s voice lowers in tone, but the authority in it increases tenfold. “Now.”
~*~
Steve finds you pacing around the break room, a paper water cone crushed in your hand. He approaches to comfort you, but the second he enters, you round on him.
“How could you do that to me?”
“Do what? Defend you?” Steve’s bewildered by your reaction, hands up in the air in front of himself defensively. 
“I wouldn’t need defending if you weren’t such a fuck up at your job, Steve.” You flail a hand in the direction of the front counter. 
“You said it yourself that everyone makes mistakes.”
“I was lying, Harrington. I don’t make mistakes. You make enough for the both of us.” You go to turn away from him but he grabs your elbow.
“Oh what, and you’re Ms. Fucking Perfect? Huh?” You wrench your elbow out his grasp. 
“In comparison to you? Hell yeah.” 
“That’s rich,” Steve barks out a laugh, running a hand through the hair at the back of his head. His stance squares off with you and he too points out toward the front counter. “How many times have I had to save you from customers who are asking for films you’ve never fucking heard about?”
“Shut up, Steve,” you roll your eyes and Steve gets more emphatic. 
“How many times have I had to come stop some creep who’s being weird to you?”
“Oh fuck you. My hero. My white knight, scaring away the big bad men,” you say in a mocking tone. You cross your arms over your chest and for the first time since walking into the back room Steve notices that you have unbuttoned a large portion of the top buttons on your shirt, probably due to the heat. With your arms folded over your chest, he can see your cleavage and he swallows. You notice and drop your arms with a scoff. “You fucking pervert. You’re no better than the rest of them!”
“What? What?!” Steve blusters, trying to play off the fact that you caught him staring. 
“You’re a fucking horn dog, that’s what.” 
“Oh please.” He turns around with a dismissive laugh and you step forward to follow him, staying in his space. 
“You know what I think? I think the reason you give me a hard time is because I never gave you the time of day,” you declare, putting your hands on your hips. The heat is rising within you now. The air is stifling and electric around you as Steve takes an angry step closer to you and you feel crackling as if you’re in the middle of a heat lightning storm. 
“Well you’re way off base with that theory, trainee,” Steve bites out. He’s smirking at you. Goddamn smirking at you as if he’s got the upperhand in spite of what you’ve just accused him of. 
“And what makes you say that?”
“Because I know you asked Robin if I was single when you first started working here,” he says smugly. He folds his arms across his own chest now and you curse your fucking eyes because they widen while taking in the way his biceps now look. Large and defined as his sleeves shift up. 
“So? That doesn’t prove anything. Maybe I just wanted to know if you were cheating on a girlfriend with all the flirting you insist on doing,” you manage to reply coolly. But Steve’s shaking his head before you even finish your statement. 
“I believe your words were - and I quote - ‘Is Steve single? Because he’s hot as fuck. I’d let that boy bend me over the break room table’.” His voice takes on a high pitched mocking quality as he approximates your tone. 
Your eyes blow wide and your jaw drops to the floor. 
“Robin, that bitch.” 
“Don’t blame Robin for your horny fantasies, trainee.” He’s got a smile on his face that you just want to slap off. Your fingers flex at your sides but you hold yourself back, taking a deep breath. 
“Then you don’t blame her for the fact that she told me you get a semi every time I wear these jeans?” 
Steve’s eyes practically bug out of his head and dart down to look at the jeans in question. You quirk an eye up, your turn to smile.
“I - what? No!” 
“So she lied? This doesn’t do it for you?” you ask, turning slightly and leaning on the back of a chair so that your ass stuck out a little, accentuating your curves. Steve’s gaze drops to your ass before pinballing all the way around the room, desperately looking at anything and everything other than you. 
“That’s not…you’re full of…”
“No, you’re full of it, Harrington. Admit it,” you say, straightening up and pointing at him. 
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Steve says, standing a little straighter and looking at you now that you’re no longer presenting your ass to him.  
“You find me irresistable,” you accuse. Steve laughs loudly and without humor. 
“And yet here I am. Perfectly capable of resisting,” he says, standing his ground. “Meanwhile you’re practically throwing yourself at me.”
“You fucking wish!”
“In your dreams.”
“In my nightmares.” 
The next few seconds seem to play out, paradoxically, both sped up and in slow motion. The heat fills the space around you, almost thick enough to cushion the air. And then Steve’s body is hurtling towards yours. Or yours towards his - you can’t be sure. All you are aware of is movement and then contact. The woosh of air and then the solidness of impact. 
Steve’s hands are on your waist, pulling your body against his as his lips crash against yours. Your hands are in his hair before you can even think about it, your movements automatic and entirely involuntary as far as you’re concerned. Fingers fisting in his locks you kick yourself internally because they feel exactly like you thought they would. Fucking pretty haired pretty boy.
His tongue is at the seam of your lips, forcing your mouth open ruthlessly and you comply, allowing him to sweep inside. Steve turns his head to the side, deepening the kiss and pushing down into you until you feel yourself being folded back, his hand sliding to your tailbone to support you through the dip.
When he pulls away, both of you gasping for air, he doesn’t move far, instead dipping to suck biting kisses against your throat.
“You gonna tell me to stop?”
His words don’t make any sense as they enter your hazy brain. One of your hands drops to his shoulder, grasping. Clinging really as he delivers a particularly rough suck to the place beneath your ear.
“W-what?”
“If you hate me so much this must be torture for you,” he breathes into your skin. The smugness has returned to his voice, muted though it is against your throat. 
“I fucking hate you, Harrington,” you seethe. He’s laughing now against your throat. 
“I know, that’s what I just said - ,”
You cut him off by roughly grabbing him by the hair and bringing him back to your lips. The moan he looses into your mouth has you humming with a satisfaction that seeps deep down into your core. He’s not getting the upper hand so easily. Not if you have anything to say about it. 
Now on a single-minded mission to ruin him, you reach down and splay your hand out against his lower back, rolling your hips forward in tandem with the motion in order to grind your pelvis against his. He lets out a groan that you feel in your extremities, so you repeat the move. 
Suddenly the hands that are on your waist drop to your hips and wrench you around so your back is to him. The twirl disorients you and you gasp, blinking at the back of the break room and panting as Steve’s hands pull you back - ass against his pelvis. 
He slaps a hand on the back of your thigh - making you whine - and slides up your curve to grip a handful of your ass. 
“I’ll be the bigger person,” he says with a heavy chuckle into your ear. “I can admit these jeans do it for me.”
A laugh rocks through your body in spite of yourself. 
“Oh yeah? They giving you a semi?” you ask jokingly. Steve pulls you back against him, hips bracketing your ass, and you feel him pressing into you. Hard. Nothing semi about it. 
“What do you think?” His voice is gruff now, his lower half grinding slowly, deliberately into yours. 
“I think you’re hard,” you say on an exhale. His laugh is full throated and his grip on your hips tighten.
“Very observant, trainee. A+ work.” His face buries itself into the crook between your neck and shoulder, lips toying with the skin there. 
“Don’t call me trainee.” Your voice is breathless but for once there is no menace in it when you say the sentence you’ve yelled at him a million times.
“No? What should I call you then?” His lips are at your ear. His fingertips dig into your hips and push you back into him. Making you feel him. “Baby? Darling?”
You let out a gasping laugh when he bucks into you from behind, knocking you off balance a bit so you have to lean forward and grasp the edge of the table. He follows you down, chest still against your back. 
“...slut?”
You’d love it if your response was to laugh in his face. To pry his hands off of you, straighten up your clothes, and walk out the door. But that’s not what happens. 
You moan. 
He says the word and you moan. 
It’s dark and filthy and you feel hot shame the minute it issues from your mouth, but the way his fingers tense immediately has got heat pooling directly between your thighs. 
“Holy shit.”
“I…that doesn’t…”
“Holy shit!” His words are laughing and victorious and he’s nuzzling his face over your shoulder even as you try to crouch away. “I fucking called it.”
“That doesn’t prove anything,” you argue, even as your back arches slightly and find yourself rocking back into him. His hand slides over the slope of your hip to the front of your jeans. 
“You moaned, trainee. I called you a slut and you moaned.” Steve’s hand cups your mound then, middle finger pressing up into the center seam of your jeans. 
“F-fuck…”  You swivel your hips to grind down into his hand, suddenly getting a taste of the friction you’d begun to crave. 
Steve uses his hand between your legs to ground you against him, giving him leverage with which to rub his hard-on directly into your ass. 
“You can lie all you want. Calling you a slut is making you writhe for me…like a cute little slut.”
You huff out an exhale and look over your shoulder at him.
“Is it the word or the fact that you’re practically fingering me through my jeans and humping me? Which is it, Steve?”
His cocky smile only widens and he shoots forward to steal a kiss over your shoulder since you’re looking at him. 
“Both?” 
“Oh christ, Harrington…” you trail off as his hand slides up and starts opening your jeans. 
“You do have a point though…” he says, biting his lip in concentration. He yanks your jeans down over your ass, leaving them bunched around your knees. His hand cups you through your underwear before yanking them to the side, fingers sweeping directly over your wet slit as you shiver. “Through the jeans wasn’t that efficient.”
“Pretty boy worries about efficiency?” you ask derisively. His finger has found your clit with no problem and your knees are feeling weaker by the second, but you definitely aren’t going to go easy on him. 
“Being pretty isn’t the only thing I’m good at, you know,” he says with humor. You find the wherewithal to reach back and peel his other hand off your hip, bringing it to close around your breast. Steve intakes breath sharply. 
“Same,” you reply with a smirk. He gropes you experimentally through your shirt before rooting underneath the hem to find your bra-clad breast. 
“So you think you’re pretty?” he taunts. 
“You do.”
“I think you’re pretty or I think I’m pretty?” Steve asks, pulling your breast out of the cup and pinching your nipple just as he sinks a finger into your pussy.
“Fuck…the first one…both…just shut up,” you grit out and arch your back. 
“I knew you’d been mean to me,” Steve quips before sinking his teeth lightly into your shoulder. 
“Steve, do you want to fuck me?” you ask, voice tinged with annoyance. His head shoots over your shoulder to try and get a look at your face.
“I can fuck you?” He sounds like an enthusiastic puppy dog and your heart lurches in spite of itself. 
“Not if you keep making fun of me, you can’t,” you say, though there’s humor in the words. 
“Ahh, you can dish it but you can’t take it. I get it. That’s cool.” Steve’s tone is casual. The exact opposite of his actions as he slowly adds another finger into your dripping channel. You keen forward, both from the force of the pleasure and from the way your reaction makes him grind his dick even harder against your ass. 
“Um…Steve?”
“Yeah?”
“So…are you going to fuck me?”
Your question makes him laugh and has his hips stuttering against you. 
“Eager to make the fantasy of me bending you over this table a reality?” 
“No. Eager to fast forward to the part where you wake up having creamed your pj’s thinking of me,” you retort, this time with a massive smile on your face as you recall the story you’d been told about Steve’s wet dreams. Steve groans. 
“Fucking Robin,” he says, letting go of your breast to reach down and open his own pants. 
“She’s the worst,” you agree. The anticipation is mounting and sweat drips off your brow. You’d down on your elbows now, bent over the table, and you can’t see Steve behind you, but you can hear the rustle of clothing. He yanks your jeans and underwear down to your ankles suddenly and you yelp and he nudges your thighs open so your legs are spread hip-width apart. 
You wait a few breathless heart beats until the sound of skin on skin - which does not include your own - has you looking over your shoulder. 
Steve is standing behind you, his own pants pooled at his feet, with his cock in his hand. He’s gripping it, giving it long, slow strokes as his eyes hungrily consume your half-bare body. 
“I…think you might kill me,” he says seriously, dragging his eyes up from your pussy to your face. You gesture down to the cock he is fisting, eyeing the size.
“Back at you.” 
He laughs at your response and heat rushes through you at how beautiful he looks with the smile cracking his face wide. You want him. Now. 
So you turn back around and bend yourself over the table again, shifting side to side to sway your ass at him enticingly. 
Steve’s on you not even a second later. His hands smooth over your hips and waist and his cock slides between your legs, between your folds. 
“Holy shit. Holy shit.” He’s repeating the phrase over and over under his breath and you’d laugh but you’re feeling similarly speechless. Impatient now, you reach back and take his cock in your hand, making him hiss. You arch and lean forward, guiding his tip into you until his hands grip your hips and he steps forward, slipping in inch by inch. 
“Oh fuck,” you both swear, practically in unison. Steve remains still for a second to let you adjust, and also to ground himself as he takes in all of what is happening in this moment. 
You find yourself nearly shaking from the feel of him inside you. He feels so good and it’s been a long, empty summer so far. Of course you’re horny, you reason with yourself in your head as you shift forward, trying to entice him to move, which he does. He’s hot and you’re horny and and it feels good. It feeels good.
“Yeah? Feels good?” 
Shit. You’ve been speaking your thoughts out loud. You go to contradict him - to take it back - but then he’s kissing your neck and you can’t help but hum. 
“Yeah. It’s good.” 
He finds a steady pace before the his words return again, this time more hoarse than before. 
“You’re so fucking hot,” he groans out, thrusting into you particularly hard. Feeling sweat slick your skin you laugh.
“It’s because there’s no fan in here.”
“Oh, she’s shy about compliments suddenly,” Steve intuits and you roll your eyes, though he can’t see it. “She knows she’s hot but doesn’t want me to point it out?”
“Steve…” you warn, but there’s little else you can do as he reaches a hand down to the apex of your thighs and starts fingering your clit. You grip numbly at the table. 
“Yeah, baby? You want me to stop talking about your incredible body?” he teases, his other hand coming down flat over your back to push you further down into the table before reclaiming your hip. “How good it feels to be inside you?”
“You’re a cocky bastard,” you say, but it comes out in a whine. You’re record-breakingly close to cumming and your brain and body seem disconnected. Unsure of what to do about the short circuiting feeling of shame and pleasure and annoyance and fondness, all of which are completely Steve’s fault. 
“You’ve got that right, sweetheart,” he responds, inhaling sharply when you clench around him in response. “What’s that? So you like being called sweetheart?”
“Mmmm,” is all you manage to moan out, though he takes it correctly as an affirmation. He has both hands gripping your waist now, allowing nothing to distract him from pounding into you, chasing his own release now while also rocketing you towards your own. 
“So you do like a little sweetness after all.” It’s teasing but you’re too fucked out to care at this point. So close. So close. Steve’s kissing the spot under your ear as he slows down to fuck you harder. Deeper. “Good thing I like it sweet. That’s how I’ve always wanted to be with you, sweetheart.”
Is it cheesy? Yes. Is it something that usually would have you slapping him and walking away? Yes.
But now you’re cumming. Crying out his name as his cock slides into you, your walls bearing down and spasming around him. 
You don’t even know where your orgasm ends and his begins, you’re so blinded by pleasure. But he’s shaking around you and his hips are stuttering and then his weight is pressing you into the table as he pants. 
There’s a split second where your shared breathe is all you can sense. His skin on yours has you buzzing and your muscles are jelly. You don’t even have a moment to think about repercussions or right or wrong. There’s just…Steve.
And then the bell rings in the distance indicating someone has entered the front door.
“Hellooo!” Comes Robin’s sing song voice. “Do my sad single friends want to hear how my date went?”
~*~
Read Part 2 Here
Steve / Stranger Things tag list (some of these are assumptions based on your interactions with my posts about my steve fic, so sorry if you didn’t want to be tagged!): @boomhauer @asbisexualasitgets @bluetreecloud20 @flightless-b1rds  let-my-ship-sail @fandomsimper @livlovelaughh @maggiemaes-stuff @adultnitemares @wonderfulw0rldx​ @bellaiscool @halolani  supe-r-nova  r4nd0mf4nd0mz25  spookyreidd  cmlover101  coolestgirlhere  jadenswifey22  ashleighjadecharlton  everybodywantstobetouched  uhcastiels  monsterhighprincess99  misaamaneswifey  steveharringtonsdaddy  getoutandtouchtherain  alexxavicry  craze4bau  sabrinablack194  iseultult  devonisntreal  navybluebitch  macey730  izbot6  sweetkyotto  @millenialcatlady​  creme-delacreme  s-trawberryv-eins  amatchinwater  vamdevil  xoxchanxl  mrssharrington  edwardmunsn  moonyscardigans  wayward-rose 
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literaryavenger · 2 months
Text
Back To You - Steve Rogers
Summary: You've always been there for Steve, and now you're watching him go back to the girl he always wanted.
Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader
Warnings: Angst, maybe language, some fluff.
Word Count: 2.5K
A/N: This was supposed to be a Reader x Steve story, but I was too tempted to make reader end up with Bucky. So I decided to make two separate endings, the original with Steve and an alternate one where she ends with Bucky, if only for @ordelixx who gave me the idea. I'd also like to thank @mrsbuckybarnes1917 for the idea and for helping me write about other characters.
Masterlist
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You know what’s about to happen. You know he’s gonna leave, you know he’s not gonna come back, you know you’ll never see him again. You know he’s gonna try to have the life he always wanted with the girl he always wanted. The girl he loves.
And that girl is not you.
You watch him as he says goodbye to Bucky, you know he knows as well as you do that his best friend isn’t coming back.
Then Steve turns to you and you try your best to smile.
“I wish I had met you earlier.”- he whispers as he kisses you on the forehead and you know in that instant this is really goodbye. You smile and nod, not being able to get a word out, willing yourself not to cry.
He walks onto the platform and soon he’s gone.
You’ve been by Steve’s side ever since he came back from the ice. You were the agent assigned to watch over him, you were there when he woke up and had to run after him when he freaked out.
You were there during the battle of New York, during the fall of Shield in DC, during the whole Ultron incident and in Lagos. You were on his side for the Accords, and you were by his side in London as he said goodbye to the love of his life. 
You were there with him and Sam in Romania to try and help Bucky, you were arrested with them and then helped fight the Winter Soldier, yet again. You were on his side to fight against Tony and the rest of the Avengers, you got arrested again and were broken out of the Raft by him.
You spent two years on the run with him, and fought next to him in Wakanda. You watched his dumb ass try to fight Thanos barehanded and were quickly knocked down when you tried to help him.
You snapped like half the universe and apparently lost 5 years of your life. You came back, thanks to him, and fought against Thanos one last time. And now you were watching him leave.
You were there to help him get accustomed to the 21st century, you were there for him on sleepless nights. You were there for him as he cried for his lost friends, his lost love and his lost life. He always came to you when he needed to talk, to be held, help sleeping and even advise.
And you were always there for him, falling in love little by little despite yourself.
You’re brought back to the present as you hear Sam freaking out on Bruce because Steve missed his mark and didn’t come back.
You look at Bucky and you both know what this means. He gives you a sympathetic smile and you try to give a smile back but fail. You look away from him and take a deep breath.
You turn around and start walking away. You’re done here, and about to break down. Something you never allowed yourself to do in front of anybody, with the exception of Steve. And now he’s gone.
You get in your car and quickly drive away, not looking back. You drive straight to Steve’s apartment. You’ve been staying there since you came back while the compound gets fixed since your own apartment has been someone else’s home for the past 5 years.
Five years. That’s how long you’ve been gone. That’s how much of life you’ve missed. 
And now you’re left the pieces of your life by yourself, along with your broken heart.
If you were completely honest with yourself you always knew it wouldn’t have worked with Steve. You’ve never thought you were remotely good enough for him, and that was before even comparing yourself to Peggy. 
There was no doubt in your mind that she was Steve’s soulmate, and you’ve talked about it enough times to know he thought the same.
- Original Ending   -
You’re taken out of your thoughts by a knock on your door. You frown and cautiously walk to it, picking up your gun from its hiding place under the coffee table.
It’s probably nothing but better safe than sorry, right?
You take a peek from the peephole and frown even more when you see that whoever’s on the other side of the door covered it.
You ready your gun and take a deep breath, your hand on the doorknob. You open and lose no time pointing right in front of you, but you almost drop it along with your jaw when you see who’s standing there.
You almost feel like you’re dreaming so you pinch yourself, which makes him laugh and when that sound hits your ears you know you’re not hallucinating either.
Steve Rogers, the same face you’ve always known, standing right in front of you.
For a moment neither of you say anything, then he decides that maybe you’re too in shock to talk so he breaks the silence. 
“I’ve never knocked on my own door before. That was a wild ride.”- He laughs again and at the sound you can’t help but let the tears you’ve been trying so hard to keep in fall.
The moment he sees the first tear Steve’s face falls and then he’s wrapping his arms around you, your face buried in his chest.
You slowly bring your own arms to wrap around his waist, almost worried that if you make any sudden moves he’s gonna disappear. Once your arms are around him too, you realize it’s all real and he’s actually there and you let yourself go, crying your eyes out and clinging to him.
Suddenly he picks you up and you hang onto him for dear life as he carries you back inside the apartment, closing the front door and then goes to sit on the couch with a still crying you on his lap.
He does nothing more than run his hand through your hair, rubbing your back with the other and letting you get it all out.
After a few minutes you start to calm down and finally get back your voice. -“I thought you were gone forever.”
Of all the reactions he could’ve had, he surprised you with the only one you didn’t expect by chuckling. -“You never were very patient, were you, sweetheart?”
You look up at him and frown, sniffling and softly say -“What do you mean? You were gone… Bruce said you missed your mark.”
He nods and wipes away the rest of your tears while he talks. -“I did. I put the wrong time by mistake. You know me and technology.”
“But… You and Peggy…”- your frown is still in place, just not being able to believe that he came back. Did you read the signs wrong? Was he always planning on coming back? Almost like he can read your mind, he starts giving you some answers, his eyes never leaving yours.
“Once I was done returning the stones, I knew I had a chance to go back to the 40s and I was gonna take it. I thought I wanted to take it. But I couldn’t.”
“Why not?”- You ask in a whisper.
“Because of you, doll.”- He says without missing a beat with a sweet smile. -“All I could think about was you. Your smile, your laugh, your strength. The way you tried so hard to be happy for me even though you thought I was leaving forever. The mere thought of not seeing you, not talking to you, not having you by my side, it killed me.”
You’re almost crying again, but you make yourself talk, needing clarification, your voice still quiet. -“What are you saying, Steve?”
“I’m saying, there is no me and Peggy. It’s me and you. It’s been me and you from day one.”- He takes your face in his hands and leans in more, your faces only inches apart. -“And I’m an idiot for taking this long to figure it out. I’m sorry, sweetheart. Can you forgive me?”
You swallow down the tears threatening to fall again and waste no time before nodding, maybe a little too eagerly but you don’t really care, and he doesn’t seem to mind either judging by his smile.
“I forgive you, Steve.”- The words are barely out of your mouth before Steve is leaning in the rest of the way and kissing you. You kiss back without thinking twice about it and after a few seconds you pull back, big goofy smiles on both your faces.
You spent the rest of the afternoon like this, cuddling and talking and just enjoying each other’s company. You didn’t do much, it wasn’t much different from the endless number of days you spent together, but you couldn’t help but feel like this was the best day of your life. And even if you didn’t know it, Steve was thinking the exact same thing.
After all, what is better than spending the day cuddling with the girl he always needed. The girl he loves.
And that girl is you.
- Alternative Ending    - 
You’re taken out of your thoughts by a knock on your door. You frown and cautiously walk to it, picking up your gun from its hiding place under the coffee table.
It’s probably nothing but better safe than sorry, right?
You take a peek from the peephole and immediately roll your eyes, lowering your gun while opening the door.
“I guess you weren’t expecting company.”- Bucky says, more amused than anything when he sees the gun in your hand.
You make no attempt to try and hide your annoyance as you roll your eyes again. -“What are you doing here, Barnes?”
It’s not that you don’t like Bucky, you just don’t know him all that well if not only thanks to the stories Steve shared of him in the 40s.
“I thought I’d make sure you were okay. You ran out of there pretty fast.”
“Yeah, well, he’s gone. It’s a done deal, don’t see why I had to stick around.”- You say crossing your arms defensively. 
Bucky doesn’t seem to mind your response as he simply leans on the doorway and keeps talking. -“He was disappointed not to see you.”
You frown, beyond confused by a single and simple sentence. Bucky smiles and elaborates. “He lived a life. And he’s old now, but still alive.”
“Oh.”- is all you can say. Steve old? You can’t even imagine it.
“He gave the shield to Sam.”- Bucky continues, just making conversation.
“Really? I would’ve thought he’d give it to you if he had to choose.”- Bucky frowns a little and tilts his head, seeming genuinely confused.
“Why would he give it to me?”
You shrug. “I don’t know, you were his best friend, you’re a supersoldier. I guess I just assumed.”
“None of that matters, Sam is a good man. He deserves it.”- He argues, then quickly adds. -“Don’t tell him I said that.”
You grin and nod, then say. -“For what it’s worth you’re a good man too, Bucky. Steve thought the world of you, trust me. He never stopped thinking highly of you.”
That was nothing more than a simple reassurance for you, but for Bucky it was so much more than that. He knew you were talking about his time as the Winter Soldier, you were telling him that, even knowing about all that, Steve never let that influence his opinion of his former best friend. He still knew who Bucky was, deep down.
Bucky never heard words like that coming from anyone that’s not Steve, and you said it so casually, like you really believe it and to you it’s no big deal to just say it. But for him, it was everything.
You didn’t know it then, but that was the moment Bucky started falling for you.
“Why are you checking up on me, Bucky? Really?”- You say after a moment, breaking the silence that fell between you.
“Steve made me promise to take care of you before he left.”- He said simply.
Bucky didn’t know it then, but that was the moment your heart broke completely.
You managed to keep yourself from breaking right then and there, but Bucky could see that something was wrong. He didn’t push it though, making conversation a little more before saying goodbye with the promise that he’d be back the next day.
And that’s what he did. In fact, he came back everyday, no matter what, to check on you.
It started out as quick visits where he wouldn’t even enter the door, then you started inviting him in for coffee because you felt bad he came to Steve’s apartment everyday, refusing to let you meet him somewhere else. 
After a while you started inviting him for meals, to watch a movie or just to hang out. You almost didn’t know how, but at one point you started to really look forward to Bucky’s visits everyday, getting excited everytime he knocked on the door. It was the best part of your day, really.
You knew Bucky felt the same, it was like you both knew what was slowly happening between you and you had a silent understanding not to discuss it. You also never discussed your feelings for Steve, but you felt like Bucky somehow knew nonetheless. 
But the more time you spent with Bucky the more those feelings seemed to fade. You still loved Steve, still missed him, you could feel yourself letting go of him with every time you spent time with Bucky, every time he made you laugh, every time your hands would accidentally touch.
You could feel yourself falling in love with Bucky and, this time, it felt right. This time you didn’t even try to stop it. 
And it seemed like Bucky felt the same way. Time after time he became more bold with his flirting, with physical touch, until eventually he was openly hitting on you and cuddling you every time he could, and when you made no attempt whatsoever to stop him it was the only signal he needed to keep going.
One day, after about a year of his daily visits, he couldn’t hold back anymore and kissed you, overjoyed when you kissed him back. He asked you out right after and you didn’t hesitate to say yes.
It was the best first date of your life, but to be fair you’d been hanging out and basically dating for almost a year, so it felt simple. Effortless and uncomplicated. 
It was everything both of you needed. Your feelings for Steve were almost gone now, which is why you couldn’t even begin to explain what happened yesterday.
You were out with Bucky, hand in hand as you walked around the park, just enjoying the sunshine, when you could swear you saw Steve, not old Steve but your Steve, just standing there, looking at you and Bucky. It was for a second, you merely glanced in his direction and by the time you turned back he was gone. 
Bucky didn’t notice anything, if not only the way you tensed and stopped in your tracks. You thought about telling him what you thought you saw, but even you knew how crazy you would’ve sounded. So you said nothing and shrugged it off.
Because it was nothing. Right? 
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angstflayer-council · 8 months
Text
July Drabble #4- Girl Talk
“I like Nancy.” 
Her voice cracked and she curled in on herself, afraid of the response that would eventually come. She didn’t know what she would do if Steve hated her for something she had tried to ignore for so long. Robin knew it was wrong to have a crush on her best friend’s ex and she knew there was a chance that Steve could react negatively, but she couldn’t keep it to herself any longer.  
She told Steve everything. She needed to tell him this.  
His silence scared her. They hadn’t turned the lights on when they climbed into the bed so she couldn’t see his face; couldn’t see his reaction.  
Robin reached out with a shaky hand and breathed a sigh of relief when Steve entwined their fingers together, their socked feet were already touching as they lay facing each other in Robin’s bed. “Are you mad at me?” The question broke the silence in the room and caused Steve to squeeze her hand in reassurance.  
“I’m not mad, Robs.” He sighed softly and held her hand against his heart. “I’m worried you’ll get hurt. I don’t know if Nancy is... ya’know.” He trailed off and if the light was on, Robin would be able to see the sad smile that no doubt pulled at his lips. 
“And for that exact reason I tried not to like her, Steve, I really did. She’s just so - “ Beautiful, smart, caring, brave.  
“Perfect.” Steve said with a soft laugh.  
Robin sighed and rolled onto her back; Steve kept her hand held tight in his own. “Perfect.” The word was both right and wrong. Robin felt she needed a whole new alphabet to find the right words to describe Nancy. 
“Are you going to tell her?”  
“Tell her that I like her? God, no. That’s between us and whatever god is listening.” Robin's not stupid. She knew she was never going to be anything more than Nancy’s friend, she’s cried and journaled about it already. It’s completely fine with her. Sort of. Not really.  
Steve moved closer, his big head now squished onto the same pillow as her. He waited a beat before saying softly, “No, are you going to tell her you’re a lesbian?” 
Steve’s words settled on top of Robin like a weighted blanket that’s just slightly too heavy. She knew that in order to confess to Nancy she'd have to come out to her but the thought made Robin’s stomach flip and flop like a fish out of water.  
“Do I have to?” She was scared, terrified actually. 
“No, but maybe telling her could help. Maybe Nancy broke up with me because she's secretly a lesbian.” Robin could hear the smile in his voice. He had a point but it was still so nerve wracking.  
What if it went badly? What if the one person Robin really wanted to know the truth didn’t accept her?  
Robin let out a sad noise, somewhere between a groan and a sob, and Steve, sensing her distress, pulled the covers over their heads so that they were shielded from the world. “You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to, Robs. There’s no rush. You’ll get there one day and when that day comes, I’ll be by your side.”  
“Oh my god, that was so cheesy.” 
“You love my cheese.”  
Robin snorted and shoved him lightly. “No, I don’t. I’m lactose intolerant.” 
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refiwrites · 2 years
Text
Eventually
PART TWO TO "Moral Of The Story" / ALTERNATE STEVE ENDING
Pairing: Steve Harrington x Fem! Reader, Eddie Munson x Fem! Reader
Summary: Tonight was the night you fought for Hawkins, for your life, for your future. Was breaking up with Steve a mistake? Or perhaps breaking up with him made you see what you truly needed?
WC: 8.8k (the longest one i’ve written yet holy shmokes)
Warning/s: VOL 2 SPOILERS! lots of swearing, HEAVY ANGST, mentions of a panic attack, graphic description of injuries, wounds, blood, all in all just pure violence.
Note: What the heck I am absolutely baffled at the amount of people that supported the first part 😭 I never imagined that being a hit but here we are and here's the long-awaited part 2! And for those asking for them to be tagged, I am greatly sorry I wasn't able to tag all of you, since the limit of tagging in a post is 50! :(
I worked very hard on this, feedbacks, likes and reblogs are greatly appreciated, let me know your thoughts!
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You kept your chin up, holding your crossbow as you put on a fake smile. “How’s the shield lookin’?” You greeted, watching Eddie’s hand grip the handle, hurling it towards the air.
“Light. But durable,” he says, punching it towards the air again, getting a better grip. “Deadly. But reliable.” Eddie smiles proudly.
“Looks cool.” You compliment the two, Dustin bows his head before the two of you looked at Eddie to see him raising his hand, his foot stepping on the basket. “Hear me now,” he begins dramatically, raising a fist to the air before opening his hand. “There will be no more retreating…” He pumps his fist down, doing a little jig of happiness. “From Eddie the Banished.”
Eddie looks at you as he toyed with the lid, his smile still etched upon his pretty face. “No more.” You assured him, smiling back.
Dustin stands up, holding his own shield. “Hey, Eddie, guess you’re really ready for bat-tle.”
The two of you look at each other before looking at Dustin with a serious look.
Dustin nods, checking if the two of you got the pun as he chortles. “You guys get it? Bat-tle.”
Eddie tilts his head at him, raising his eyebrows.
Dustin rolled his eyes. “B-A-T. No?”
Eddie shook his head, dropping his shield to the ground as you watched. “I thought I had a good one.” He says before he’s fully tackling Dustin, making you gasp out in surprise. “What are you doing?!” Dustin exclaimed; poor boy hadn’t got the chance to defend himself.
You laughed out loud before Eddie was pushing Dustin away with a teasing smile.
Dustin wouldn’t let himself go down that easily, being a tough kid he is. “You son of a bitch!” He said in fits of laughter as he tried tackling Eddie down, getting his own taste of revenge.
“Alright Henderson! Take him down!” You cheered. “No wedgies! No wedgies!” Dustin shouts, making you even laugh harder, clutching at your stomach.
You watched as the play-fight ceased, how Eddie laughed out of breath, his hair sticking to his face from the light layer of sweat as he held Dustin.
You smiled. You could tell Dustin really looked up to Eddie, how Dustin’s smile widened, it was like seeing your own favorite superhero come to life. “Never change. Dustin Henderson.” Eddie spoke. “Promise me?”
Tilting your head, you watched the two. “I wasn’t planning on it.” Dustin responded. “Good.” Eddie said. “Good.” Dustin repeated. They laughed as Eddie pat his back.
“And what do we have here?” Eddie breaks away from Dustin to face you, eyeing the crossbow in your hand and the arrows poking from your back.
You raised your crossbow, which was loaded, but the safety lock was on.
Eddie takes a second to glance at you. He noticed that your eyes were a little puffy, a sign that you had cried again, but he let it slide.
“We have our own archer.” Eddie says to you. “This is the coolest thing I saw there, why not? And my aim is very accurate.” You proudly say.
Eddie’s stare lingers on you for a little longer, you could feel it as you fixed the strap of your crossbow, slinging it over your body.
Eddie noticed his actions; he shakes his head before walking a few feet away. “Hey! Sinclairs!”
“How are those, uh… spears coming on?” He shouts over to them. You looked at the siblings, Lucas seemed to be struggling whilst Erica looked like she was doing a great job. Lucas throws a thumbs up in your direction, smiling.
“It just doesn’t make sense.” Steve says, holding the funnel still so Robin could pour gas onto the glass bottle. The conversation between the two of you bore into his mind, your words echoing in his head.
“Get your shit together, Steve. Because it’s not fair. It’s not fucking fair.”
“We’re done.”  
“What doesn’t make sense?” Robin asked. Steve shakes his head, changing the topic.
“That was Dan Shelter, he graduated, like, two years ago.” He spoke. “So?” Robin replied. “So he’s in college… Which means he was visiting on spring break. Fast Times was returned like- I don’t know, a week ago?” He looks at Robin to make sure she was listening.
“Right? Unless she’s got some horndog brother we don’t know about… which is possible- Or she’s just really into Judge Reinhold?”
“Steve.” Robin interjected.
“What?” Steve looks at her. “I don’t care. I don’t understand why you do either with everything that’s going on… Honestly this feels like a perfect time for that little pull of the rug because… In the face of the world ending, the stakes of my love life feel spectacularly low.” Robin said.
Steve sighed. “Yeah, I mean, I get you there, but I still have hope.” Hope for what exactly? Steve doesn’t know. Now that he just took a huge wrecking ball in your relationship, he wonders if its still able to be repaired.
“Not everything has a happy ending.” Robin noted. “Yeah, yeah, believe me. I know.” Steve replied.
Robin chuckled, looking at you, but Steve’s gaze was at Nancy. “Your relationship’s fine, Steve, don’t sweat on it.”
Steve clutches another bottle, his other hand holding the funnel. “No. It’s not.”
“Not? What? Why?” Robin questioned.
“I messed it up, and I think- I think I’m still in love with-“
Robin glanced at you, then at Nancy, before looking at Steve. “No shit? Steve, come on.” Robin said in a hushed tone. “I- she broke up with me- earlier.”
“How are you holding up?” Robin said. “I don’t know, I feel…” Steve shrugged, it felt empty.
“Try to fix it if you can. I know she cares about you, Steve. Have you seen the way she looks at you? Even back then in the mall she couldn’t handle being in the same room with you ‘cause she’ll turn so red.” Robin reminisced.
Steve looked at Robin. “Whatever you do, make it count since… I have this terrible, gnawing feeling that… it might not work out for us this time.”
“You think we shouldn’t be doing this?” Steve spoke. “I think we’re mad fools, the lot of us, but-“ Robin sighs as both of them look at the rest of the gang.
Nancy was trying to regain her aim, while you, Dustin, and Eddie were playing with the shields. Dustin running away from the two of you before grabbing the shield that Eddie clumsily dropped and now, he was the one getting chased. Steve watched as you and Dustin playfully pretended to jab Eddie with the shield, how he plays along with you, kneeling to the ground making pained noises, laying down on the grass in defeat. You laugh, sitting down on the grass in front of him, catching your breath. The Sinclair siblings were trying out their spears, Lucas spinning it around while Erica was testing the sturdiness of their work.
“We have to try. Right?”
Steve tears his gaze away from you, looking at Robin. “Yeah.”
Steve raises a bottle. “To killing Vecna.” Robin does the same, smiling. “Slash Henry.”
“Slash one.” Said Steve before they let their bottles clink.
Thankfully, there were more time for everyone to get dressed. Everyone was now clad in their battle armor. Now with the plan in mind, everyone was silent for the whole ride towards the Creel house, where Lucas, Max, and Erica were stationed. Then you, Dustin, Eddie, Steve, Robin, and Nancy were in charge in the Upside Down. You, Eddie and Dustin were tasked with distracting the demobats, while Nancy, Steve, and Robin were tasked with taking care of Vecna.
The sunset colored the interior of the RV in an orange hue. You and Eddie were once again sat together.
“If our plan doesn’t work, I don’t know what I’ll do.” Eddie mumbled, his head in his hands. You frown, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder. “It will, we’ll make sure of it.”
“And there’s no way they wouldn’t fall for it, if our calculations are correct…” Dustin trailed off. You watched as Eddie places his hands on the table, his rings glinting thanks to the sunlight through the window.
This night, this night would probably be the biggest battle you had to face in your entire life. Your future depended on it. You couldn’t help but stare at Steve in the driver’s seat, how his face looked solemn. You bit your lip, swallowing. You couldn’t feel guilty now, you needed to focus.
The two of you hadn’t spoken ever since earlier. Although your eyes would find each other every once in a while, or so.
The van halted to a stop, outside was the Creel house.
As the door opened, Erica, Lucas, and Max steps out, holding their lanterns. The door slams shut, the atmosphere feeling suddenly heavy as you watched Max step foot into the house as the van began moving again, letting them disappear from your view.
The sky slowly turns dark as Steve parked.
“Okay. I wanna run through it one more time.” Nancy said, looking at everyone. You nodded. “Phase one.” “We meet Erica at the playground, she’ll signal Max and Lucas when we’re ready.” Robin answers. “Phase two.” Nancy said. “Max baits Vecna. He’ll go after her, which’ll put him in his trance.” Steve replied. Nancy looks at him. “Phase three?”
“Me, Dustin, and Eddie draw the bats away.” You said, then from the corner of your eye you see Eddie ruffling Dustin’s hair, which made Steve look at the two before turning back to Robin as she spoke.
“We head into Vecna’s newly bat-free lair, and…” Robin raises the Molotov, sloshing the liquid inside. “Flambé.”
Nancy nods, staring at the ground. “Nobody moves on to the next phase until we’ve all copied.” She looks up. “Nobody deviates from the plan, no matter what. Got it?”
“Got it.” You all reply in unison before exiting the RV.
Once again, you all jog your way into Eddie’s trailer, opening the door and closing it once everyone got in. Steve flicks the light switch on, his eyes gluing onto the glowing red gate to the Upside Down.
Steve drops his bag, approaching the makeshift rope.
“Be careful.” Dustin says to Steve. “Thanks, buddy.” Steve said, giving him a light pat on the chest. Taking in a breath, Steve grabs at the rope. “Here goes nothing.”
Steve successfully climbs into the Upside Down, his feet landing with a thud as he hits the ground, looking back up and shrugging nonchalantly. You rolled your eyes, always the showoff. You could hear Robin muttering sarcastically. “What does he want us to do, applaud?”
You see Steve dragging the mattress, flopping it on the ground, serving as a landing pad. “Alright, let’s go.”
First up was Nancy, who got an extra boost from Robin. Nancy hits the landing pad, you could see Steve offering his hand, pulling her up. And you swore you could see them stare at each other, shaking your head, you brushed the feeling off. Next up were the bags, you threw your weapons in.
Second one was Eddie, followed by Robin. Now it was your turn. You lunged yourself up, grabbing the rope as you climbed. Going through the gate you suddenly feel the weight of gravity hit as you flop onto your back on the bed with a gasp.
You blinked a few times, then you saw two hands reaching out for you. Steve and Eddie, on either side of you. Looking at neither, you grabbed both their hands as they hoisted you up. The next was the shields, spears, and a few more bags as the last person to come through was Dustin, he lands with a thud, a surprised look in his face.
He sits up, amazed before he was being pulled by the shirt thanks to Eddie and Steve.
After gearing up, Nancy opens the door, stepping out, followed by all of you.
You could hear thundering as you were back in the gloomy place. Shivers began to crawl up your back seeing everything with dark root-like features crawling everywhere. You let out a breath you realized you had been holding.
“Hey, guys, listen.” Steve said, suddenly turning around to face the three of you. “If things here start to go south, I mean, at all- you abort.” Steve said, looking at you, before glancing at Dustin and Eddie. “Okay? Draw the attention of the bats. Keep ‘em busy for a minute or two. We’ll take care of Vecna.” The three of you nodded.
“Don’t try to be cute or be a hero or something… Okay? You guys are just—”
“Decoys.” The three of you reply. Steve looks at you, pursing his lips and nodding. “Don’t worry. You can be the hero, Steve.” Dustin said. Eddie agreed, “Absolutely. I mean, look at us.” He glances at Dustin then at you. “We are not heroes.” He looks back at Steve, chuckling.
Steve began walking away but Eddie calls out to him. “Hey, Steve,” They look at each other. “Make him pay.”
Steve nods, grabbing the chance to take one last look at you as you did the same. You sent him a nod and a small smile. You could see the edge of Steve’s lip curl up, but a second later he was already walking away. As they began their journey, the three of you began nailing bits and pieces of metal onto Eddie’s trailer, making sure that when things go south, you’ll be protected from the inside.
You hammered it on, looking to the side to see Eddie ripping off a fence, placing it onto the rug along with miscellaneous materials as Dustin and Eddie pulled it towards the trailer. You hopped off, done with your work, you decide to help hold the metal scrap as Eddie drilled it in. “Sure, you got that in, Munson?” You said, looking up at him as his tongue sticks out in determination. You chuckle at the habit.
“Yes…ma’am.” He replied, patting the new layer of protection. You smiled at him as he also smiled at you. You avert your gaze, the smile never leaving your face. After a few more minutes of reinforcing Eddie’s trailer, the three of you step back to admire the work you’ve done as thunder booms in the distance.
“Not bad.” Eddie said.
“Not bad at all.” Dustin said as he smiled.
“Great job, boys.” You said, breathing out. Eddie chuckles, shaking his head. “We’re only getting started. Now for the fun part.”
You and Dustin looked at each other before the three of you entered his trailer, heading straight to his room. Eddie halts, eyes going wide. “Jesus Chr…” Eddie lets out almost something akin to a whimper as you watched. Dustin chuckles as Eddie slowly approaches his guitar mounted on the wall in awe.
“It’s like… she was destined for an alternate dimension.” Eddie said.
He slowly reaches up to grab it. “What do you say, guys?” turning around he looks at the two of you. “Are you ready for the most metal concert in the history of the world?”
“Hell yeah!” You smile.
“Is that a rhetorical question?” Dustin remarked.
Eddie slings the guitar on him. “Let’s do it.” With a devilish grin, he slings the guitar onto his back.
Even with the thought of impending doom in the back of your mind, being with Dustin and Eddie was enough to calm your nerves, but your mind often had you rethinking about Steve. Where were they now?
Steve watched Robin as she was rambling on about the possibility of them getting lost.
“We’re not lost, Robin.” Nancy said. Only thing she got was a chuckle from her. “Robin, hey. Watch out for the vines! Hive mind, remember?” Nancy reminded her as Robin took off. “Thank you!” Robin responded, and then she was off.
“Uh, don’t worry about her.” Steve said, walking besides Nancy. “She’s just stressed, y’know, scared.”
“Yeah. Yeah, I know.” Nancy replied. “It’s just…” “She’s a super klutz?” Steve finished, looking at her as she chuckled. Steve tried to keep the conversation steady, his mind flashing back to you. At this point, Steve just wanted things to be done with. He was still conflicted, having Nancy in front of him all this time had him reminisce of the past that they had together, which Steve will admit that was long gone. However, after all the time had passed, with you getting with him and him rarely seeing Nancy, it was easy to forget the hole that she left in his heart, that was eventually filled by you.
“She did tell me that it took her longer to walk than most babies, so…”
Steve chuckles, shaking his head. “I really shouldn’t laugh.”
He was being a total asshole, he realized that sooner than he liked, now he’s walking in the Upside Down with a broken heart. Seeing Nancy only made things worse, as he realized how he’d pine over her the past weeks, always wanting to be near her, hell, he even forgot you. That, that was fucked up of him. Now, all he could do was pretend everything was fine.
“When I was a baby, I actually crawled backwards.” Steve admits.
“Crawled backwards?” Nancy repeats. Steve looks at her for a split second, before acting it out. “You know, I’d push with my hands like this. Beep. Beep... Always in reverse, you know?”
Steve looks at Nancy, gesturing with his hands. “Come on. It makes sense. You push to move, right?” “No, no. It doesn’t make sense.” Nancy laughs. “Well, it did to my tiny little Harrington brain.”
Steve shrugged. “That is, until I reversed my baby butt down a flight of stairs and thumped my head really good.” Steve looks at Nancy, seeing her face in disbelief. “Yeah.”
“Wow. That explains so much.”
“Yeah. I think it kinda does. I think, like, right out of the gate, like- I’m super confident. But y’know I’m also, like, an idiot… Which is just… I mean it’s a brutal combination.”
Then Steve remembered how he was just like that, with you, but the only thing was, you were the only one able to understand him for what he truly is as a person, you’ve uncovered many things in the span of the two of you being together, that made Steve realize how much he had to learn through you, how you taught him of certain things in life, that not everything gets to be handed to him in his life, he’s got to work hard for it. To truly understand what it was like.
“But, I mean, the good news is, I get a big enough thump on my head, I can change, you know? I can learn.” What happened between you was a lot more than a thump to his head, it was like someone had dropped a gallon of ice-cold water on him, bucket included. “I can crawl forward.”
But at every glance he takes at Nancy, there’s an ache in his heart, no matter what he does. This was wrong. He was beating himself up in his mind. How could he just simply throw a perfect, loving, healthy relationship with you for someone that doesn’t even like him that way anymore? Steve glanced back, even though he was farther away from you, it still doesn’t help that the uneasy feeling pooling in his stomach at the thought of you being so far away about to bait yourself from those goddamn bats that almost killed him. It sent him shaking his head, trying to focus that you were safer there. You were safe with Dustin and… Eddie.
Steve shakes the thought of you and Eddie in his mind, focusing on the conversation with Nancy.
“Listen, I guess what I’m trying to say in a really stupid, roundabout way is, um…” Steve sighs, stopping with a click of his tongue. “…Is thank you.”
Nancy wears a look of confusion, being taken aback. “Thank me?”
“Yeah.”
“For...?”
“For giving my head the biggest thump of its life, two years ago, and now.” Steve breathes out. “I needed it. It’s changed my life.”
“What do you mean now...? Steve?” Nancy questioned.
“I used to think if I hadn’t done the things I did…a part of me still thinks that we would’ve made it.” Steve didn’t know what he was doing, it probably wasn’t the best way to earn closure like this. He was just spewing out words that made sense to him.
“Steve…” Nancy began, Steve looked down, swallowing. “You can’t do this, Steve.” Nancy said. Those words came crashing down on Steve’s chest.  He knew he didn’t stand a chance but seeing and hearing those words from Nancy solidified it. “Have you thought about (Y/N)? I mean- how would she feel? She’s been with you longer than me, Steve. She’s been with you through everything that happened. She loves you, Steve, I could see it. I only didn’t speak about it since I thought maybe we were just catching up together- as friends.” Nancy breathes out.
Now that felt like he was given another thump on the head, thanks again to Nancy. Friends. That’s all they would ever be, no more, no less. And you just broke up with him.
Steve was about to open his mouth to reply, but then rushed footsteps and Robin’s voice was heard. “You guys! Awesome news!”
Steve bit his lip, he didn’t know if he should be thankful for the disturbance or not, since it means he was once step closer to his grave.
“Looks like we weren’t going the wrong way after all.” Robin pants. “Come on!”
Steve and Nancy look at each other. Steve gives up, jerking his head towards Robin, walking away. “Let’s go!” Robin rushed.
“Okay.” Steve muttered; the words unsaid leaving to rot in the back of his head.
━━━━━━»»•••««━━━━━━
Every second you felt your anxiety getting worse. Waiting atop of Eddie’s trailer, Dustin was tasked communicating with the other team, listening if your phase was about to commence.
Tapping your foot, you were stood by the edge, overlooking the rest of the houses and trailers scattered, with the forest looming over. You had everything planned, nothing could go wrong, right?
There were a few taps on your shoulder, looking around you spot Eddie, wearing his usual smile, moving to stand next to you. “So, you feel alright?”
“I don’t-“ You sigh, gesturing all over the place. “I don’t know, really… we just have one chance at this and if we fuck this up I-“
“Hey, hey…you know I’m also close to shitting myself here but,” You laugh at Eddie’s words, easing your anxiety. “We’ll get through this, okay? When all this is over then we’re free to do any shit we like.” Eddie said, smiling.
“Hmm, and what are you planning on doing when all of this is over?” You asked. Eddie lets outs a sigh, eyes blinking in thought. “Never really had someone ask me that.”
“Well, here I am, asking.” You smile.
“Dunno, probably clear my name first, then, like, go back to my band or something- even go on tour- Sounds weird now that I’m saying this out loud.” Eddie looks down, chuckling. You shake your head, laughing with him.
“Doesn’t sound weird to me, and I promise you, we’ll do everything we can to prove to everybody that you’re innocent.” You promised. Eddie smiled at you, he always liked your aura, its like everywhere you went there followed hope. Even when Eddie could tell that you were hurting, your smile still felt genuine, well, to him anyways.
Maybe, after all of this, he’d definitely would like to get to know you better. Maybe even teach you how to play D&D, who knows.
Then the two of you hear the chatter of Dustin’s walkie talkie.
“She’s in. Move to phase three.”
“Copy that. Initiating phase three.” Dustin replied.
Both you and Eddie look at each other. “Goodluck.” You said, moving over next to Dustin, plugging the amplifier as Dustin cranks the volume up, the feedback ringing in your ears. Eddie looked nervous; you could tell.
He nods, yanking the pick from his necklace. With a shout, he grabs his guitar then began strumming.
You and Dustin watched in awe, smiling as the two of you bopped your heads to the music. “Go Munson!” You cheer.
Meanwhile Steve watched as the bats screeched, flapping their wings, moving in unison toward the direction of the loud music. He knits his eyebrows, worry crossing his features. He hoped you remembered his advice earlier.
As Eddie strummed, you almost forgot you were in an alternate dimension, you watched as Eddie headbanged as his fingers worked their way in playing with all their might. You and Dustin continued to headbang yourselves as the two of you laughed. “This is amazing.” Dustin commented, watching Eddie.
He places his foot up onto another amplifier, continuing to rock. Dustin pulls out his telescope, watching for any signs of the demobats.
After a moment Dustin looked, he stands up. You looked to the distance. “Eddie! We gotta lock down in T-minus 30 seconds!” Dustin shouted at him. Eddie nods, licking his lips before continuing to play louder.
Looking toward the distance you could already see a flock of them, making you stand up.
“T-minus 20!”
Eddie’s eyes sent you a wave of determination, looking at you before he shreds the solo. You could already hear your heartbeat drumming in your ears as the adrenaline rush began. “Let’s go Eddie!” You
“T-minus 10!”
Eddie pushes through.
“Five!”
You could hear the thunder cracks began to get louder.
“One!”
Eddie finishes, the last strum echoing as it fades.
“Move, move, move!” You screamed. “Let’s go!” You all jumped down towards the pickup truck and back onto the ground as the chitter of the bats neared. You rounded towards the makeshift gate. “Go! Go!” Eddie ushered. “Shit! Shit!” Dustin screams.
Once you and Dustin made it in, Eddie followed. “Hurry! Eddie, shut it!” Dustin screamed at him. With a huge clang, Eddie shuts the gate, just in time as the bats landed.
“Hurry! Come on!” Dustin said, opening the door. You and Eddie made your way in, Eddie slamming the door.
Catching your breaths, you all looked at one another. “Dude! Most metal ever!” Dustin screamed. “Oh my… Oh my god!! Eddie followed Dustin, jumping up and down with adrenaline. You joined in, screaming and jumping with them. You laughed as it stopped, Eddie balling his hands into fists and screaming. “That was- jeez that was awesome.” You breathe out. Now that the bats were distracted, you couldn’t help but let your mind drift to Steve.
Holding your crossbow in hand, you listened closely to the swarm of demobats as they thrashed the trailer, clanging and banging everywhere.
Every slam of the creatures on the wall had you gripping the crossbow tighter, your knuckles almost turning white as you let out a shaky breath.
Then the thrashing stopped.
“Hey, dipshits!!” Dustin calls out. “Give up that easy, huh?!”
“Shh!” Eddie shushed, “Is that really necessary?”
You were about to speak when the clattering began sounding from above the trailer. All of you simultaneously stare at the ceiling. “They’re on the roof.” Eddie spoke.
“No shit.” You reply.
“Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit.” Dustin repeatedly mumbles. The three of you follow the scattering, your eyes trailing down towards the vent. “They can’t get in through there, can they?” Dustin asked, gripping his spear.
As if it was on cue, a demobat smashes the vent down, creating a hole as it stuck its head inside. Eddie and Dustin jumped back; your eyes widened. Wasting no time, you aimed your loaded crossbow, turning the safety off before shooting at it, you successfully hit its wing, leading it to crawl back out of the hole.
Eddie and Dustin screamed as more demobats tried to squeeze through, grasping their spears, they rushed and began poking through the vent with their spears. “Die! Die!” Dustin shouted. You loaded another arrow, raising the crossbow and aiming. Shooting, you successfully hit a demobat on the neck, the creature dying with a screech.
Eddie looks back, he seemed to be looking for something. He rushes towards the side to grab a chair. “Eddie! What are you doing? I need you!” Dustin said. “Get out of the way! Get out of the way!” He screamed, placing the chair towards the vent as he hoists himself up. With a yell, Eddie blocks the vent with one of the shields.
The demobats trilled.
Eddie and Dustin catch their breath. “Holy shit. Holy shit.” Eddie said. “Nice.” Dustin said. “Thanks.” Eddie responded, high-fiving Dustin.
“Guys,” they both turn to look at you. “Are there other vents we should know about?”
“Oh shit.” Eddie breathes out, jumping down from the chair and rushing to his room. You followed as Dustin let out a few more curse words. As Eddie slams the door open, the demobats already rushed in, flocking around his room, screeching. “Fuck!” You exclaim. “Go, let’s go!” You pulled them both away from the door, slamming it.
You knew the wooden door stood no chance against them as they began chipping at the wood, already making slits through the door. “Come on, come on hurry!” You scream. Eddie grabs the other shield; you gripped your crossbow. “That’s not gonna hold!” Dustin said, referring to the almost beaten down door.
“Go! Climb!” You shouted at Dustin, he grabs at the rope, grunting as he pulls himself up. “Come on, quickly!”
Dustin safely makes his way back into Hawkins, flopping on Eddie’s bed.
“(Y/N)! Hurry!” Eddie shouts at you, for a split second you didn’t want to leave him there. You wanted to stay, you wanted to fight with him. To hell with your future if you died now.
But as Eddie shouts at you once again, you knit your eyebrows, slinging your crossbow onto your back as you climbed the rope fast as your body can. Your heart hammering in your chest. You flop down onto Eddie’s bed with a thud, you wasted no time standing up, looking at Eddie.
“Eddie, come on! What are you waiting for?!” You screamed at him. Eddie threw the spear and shield away, already hoisting himself up. You watched intently, wanting Eddie to get over here as fast as he could, to make it safe back here in Hawkins. You wanted him to climb faster. It was already a losing battle. You could hear the door cracking in the distance as Eddie turns to look at it.
“Eddie come on, please!” You shouted along with Dustin. “You’re so close, Eddie come on now let’s go!” Dustin screamed. “Leave it, Eddie! We’ll find another way!” You shouted.
Eddie stopped.
The thought already clicked in your head as your eyes widen, watching him drop down back onto the ground. “Eddie.” Dustin called. Eddie looks up at the both of you, his face stricken with gloom as he already made the decision in his mind.
“Don’t- don’t fucking do this to us, Eddie.” You spoke. Eddie rushed back, grabbing his spear and shield, he aims the spear at the rope as you tried to grab onto it.
“DON’T! EDDIE!” You pleaded. He screamed, slicing the rope off as it fell limp in your hands.
You shake your head, looking around everywhere for a chair able to jump yourself back in the Upside Down. You looked up to see him moving the bed out of the way. “Eddie, stop! Eddie, stop!” Dustin’s voice cracked as he pleaded, you felt your throat tighten, hearing how Dustin pleaded. You knew Eddie meant so much to Dustin. “Stop, stop, stop.” Dustin said, holding his head in his hands, looking at Eddie.
Your breath quickened. Your chest hurt. You needed to act.
Rushing towards the chair, you trashed everything that was atop of it. “Eddie, what are you doing?!” Dustin screamed. “I’m buying more time.” You could hear him say.
Oh, you absolute little shit You thought, trying to push the thought of Eddie sacrificing himself just to get more time.
“No!” Dustin disagreed. Eddie fades out from view. “Eddie, please!” Dustin cried.
You rushed, throwing the rope away before replacing it with the chair. You grabbed Dustin, patting him on the shoulders as tears ran down his cheeks. “Dustin, hey, whatever you do, don’t- don’t follow, okay? Promise me?” You pleaded.
Dustin looks at you, the poor kid’s eyes widen as he shook his head. “No, no, not you too, (Y/N) please.” He begged, fresh tears running down his cheeks. You shake your head, smiling as tears blurred your vision, trying your best to smile at him. “Dustin, listen, hey,” you say, wiping off his tears with your thumbs, in hopes to comfort the kid. “I have to, okay? We must end this, once and for all. No more trouble, no more Upside Down bullshit.” You spoke. “You’ll get to live your life out there.” You spoke, blinking your tears back.
“Please, (Y/N)…” Dustin croaked as he sobbed. “I’m sorry, buddy, please,” You say, shaking your head you pushed him away, leading him to land on the floor. “Don’t follow.” Was the last thing you said before you ran for a jump start, using the chair as leverage. The chair drops as you managed to hoist yourself up.
“(Y/N)! NO!” Dustin scrambles to stand up, wanting to reach out to you but it was too late. You already dropped into the upside down on your side with an agonizing shout. You definitely felt something break.
Trying your best to disregard the aching pain in your shoulder, you stood up, seeing the door open. “Hold on, Eddie.” You mumbled as you heard Dustin screaming above you.
You braced yourself and ran outside. You could hear the chittering of the demobats. You could see a flock of them following something, or someone.
Eddie.
Flinching, you heard a chitter behind you, it was a demobat hissing. You slung your crossbow back, trying to load and aim as it circled you. “Come on, come on.” You mumble, waiting for the right time. As it circled around you once more, you took the shot. It fell limp on the ground, screeching.
You stared at it, then your head perks to the direction of the flock. Looking around, you spot another bike.
Running towards it, you rode it and began biking, wanting to reach Eddie sooner. Your legs felt like they were on fire as you dreaded every second you weren’t with Eddie. You took on the other side of the road, you were slowly gaining up speed, catching up to him. You could see the bats gaining up to him as well.
There was only one thing you could do.
“Come here fuckers!!” You shouted, catching the attention of a few demobats as they trilled, switching in direction. You spot Eddie, looking at you as if you were a ghost.
“Come on, what are you waiting for?!” You screamed. Half of the demobats were now onto you, you biked faster as your legs could. “(Y/N)!” Eddie called out. You paid no attention to him, you only cared about diverting the demobats away from him.
“Yeah, that’s right! FOLLOW ME!” You screamed, lungs burning, not only from screaming, but from inhaling the particles floating around.
Eddie could only watch as the demobats chasing him were now onto you.
He was in shock as he saw you there with him, biking along, letting the demobats use you for bait. A part of him felt relieved, at least in this moment he wasn’t alone, somehow you still found the courage to join him even if it meant no chance of making it out alive.
The other part of him wanted to be angry at you, he wanted to be angry at the fact that you followed him, risking yourself in the process. He didn’t want to admit it, but he was scared. He’s scared. Never in his life he thought he’d be fighting for his life in the year that he even hoped to graduate in.
As if any of that even mattered anymore. Even if his sacrifice goes unnoticed, he still felt at peace in knowing somehow, he was able to save all of Hawkins. But he couldn’t let you do that for him.
You were doing a good job at making the creatures chase after you. That is, until the chainrings snapped.
Eddie’s eyes widen as everything he saw played in slow motion.
Your eyes struck with fear as you lost your balance, swerving to the right as your body’s instinct was to flee itself from the bike, your body landing in a thud as you rolled a few feet away due to the speed you were going. “(Y/N)!” Eddie shouted, gaining speed on his bike to reach you.
You groaned in pain as you tried your best to stand up, your body ached. Looking around you find yourself surrounded by the demobats as they circled around you. Grabbing your crossbow again, you loaded it as the pain in your shoulder became unbearable as you let out an agonizing grunt. There were a few already trying to make a bite at you. Your ears rang from their constant chittering.
Shooting one down, you were unaware of the one behind you as it already landed on your leg, taking a bite out on the side of your thigh. You screamed, smacking the bat with your crossbow as blood seeped through your jeans. “Fuck,” You shudder. The bite stung. You kept your head up, looking around for any more demobats that could unexpectedly come at you.
“(Y/N)!” You hear Eddie.
Looking around you spot Eddie, throwing his bike away, grabbing his spear and shield, and was headed towards you. “Eddie!” You called; he could see how your face contorted in fear. “Hold on!” He said, trying to find a way in to get to you.
You tried moving but the bats prevented you from doing so, in the corner of your eye you could see Eddie, pushing his way through as couple of bats nip and bit at him. “Eddie!” You called again, aiming for the bat that was on his back, breathing out, you shot it down as Eddie rushed toward you, now the two of you are back-to-back against these hellish creatures.
“I couldn’t let you do this on your own!” You shouted, hoping he heard. “And you’re stupid enough for that!” Eddie shouts back. “I couldn’t care less, let’s finish this!” You said, suddenly you remember stuffing a Molotov inside your bag. Eddie shouts as he tried fending the bats away, jabbing them with his spear.
“Eddie.” You called. “Yeah? A little busy here!”
Shooting another bat down, but one got to your arm as it took another bite at you. Dropping your bag, you grab an arrow, gripping it tight enough. With your vision going dizzy you jammed the arrow into the bat’s head, its blood splattering as you yanked it off of you. Eddie also looked to be suffering from a few bites too as his shirt had tears and blood seeping through them.
“Cover me!” You shouted at Eddie as you ducked to rummage in your bag. Eddie looks at you before doing so, defending himself with the shield and thrusting his spear into the air to hit a few bats.
Successfully grabbing the Molotov, you only needed one more thing.
“Eddie! Please tell me you have some kind of lighter with you!” You shouted. Eddie blinks back, thinking. “In my jacket, left side pocket!” He replied. You thanked all the gods as you reached in the pocket of Eddie’s leather jacket, pulling out the lighter.
Then another bat came at you, biting down at your stomach as you let out a scream, dropping the lighter in the process. You could feel its teeth sinking in deeper as it chowed away at you, your blood darkening as it seeped through your shirt. “Get away!” You hear Eddie, grabbing the bat by the hand as he pulled it from you, slamming it onto the ground, scurrying away. “Shit, (Y/N).”
You shake your head, grabbing the lighter again, ignoring the pain in your stomach.
“Eddie, if I say run, run, okay?!” You said, clutching the Molotov with you as you tried to see if the lighter worked. “What about you?!”
“I’ll follow, I’ll throw these at them, hope to God it works, and when they scatter, we run, run as fast as we can to that house, okay?” You instructed, pointing at a much stable house not far away from where the two of you were as you hissed in pain. Eddie nods. “Do it! I’m getting sick of these bastards!”
You crouched, your thumb striking the lighter. It sparked, yet there was no flame. You tried again, nothing. “Hurry up, (Y/N)!” Eddie hollers.
“Fuck, give me a second!” You struggled, repeatedly striking your thumb onto the spark wheel. You were slowly getting frustrated, it didn’t help that you were also losing blood by the second. “Oh why won’t you fucking wo-“ You strike it again finally, there was a flame.
“Hah! Hah, oh my god.” You breathe in relief, immediately sticking the lighter to the towel. “Okay, get ready!” You said to Eddie. “Yep, come on!” He shouts.
“Come and get this!” You shout in anger, standing up and throwing it at them. Everything suddenly glowed a bright orange as the fire spread throughout the bats as they let out pained screeches. Then they scattered, avoiding the fire yet some were too late. Eddie watched as every bat that flew were either catching on fire or dropping to the ground. You sling your bag back on, absentmindedly grabbing Eddie’s hand. “Come on!” You tugged him as the two of you ran towards the target house.
“Jesus Christ that was…!” Eddie exclaims as the both of you ran. Your leg and stomach stung from the bite, leading you to tighten the grip on his hand a little bit as you lightly tripped, mind getting hazy. “(Y/N)? Come on, come on, I got you.” You hear Eddie says as he pulls you to stand again as the two continued to run.
Reaching the house, you scrambled to find a window that wasn’t covered by the vines. When you did, you slid it open, whimpering in pain as the wall grazed your stomach. Pushing yourself into the house, you landed in a thud. Eddie followed, once the two of you were in safely, he shuts the window and slides the curtains on.
The two of you sat against the wall, panting and whimpering heavily. Your lip quivering as the both of you narrowly escaped death. Letting out a shaky breath, you threw your head back and closed your eyes. Hoping the bats were burning, suffering. Your head pounded as your vision seemed to spin even with your eyes closed.
“Fuck me…” You hear Eddie say from beside you. “I- I thought- I thought I wasn’t going to make it.” He groans, looking down at his bloodstained shirt, wounds on his stomach hurting. Everything felt numb, every slight movement you make sent a jolt of pain throughout your wounds.
You laugh dryly, “You’re stupid for thinking that,” you breathe in. “I couldn’t let you.” You said, opening your eyes, looking at him.
He looks at you. “Why?”
You chuckle. “You have so much to live for, Eddie Munson. And I did promise you we’ll help in clearing your name, right?”
Eddie looks at you, there was silence between the two of you as the distant sounds of the demobats hurting sounded in the background. You stayed looking at each other. “Uh, thank you.” Eddie breaks the silence, looking down at his wounds and shaking his head as he lifted his shirt. “This is going to be one hell of a scar.”
“Believe me.”
The two of you went silent again, deciding to find a first-aid kit. Wanting to patch up the larger wounds that you and Eddie sustained. Thanks to the house you were in, there was indeed a first-aid kit laying around in the bathroom.
As you sat in the living room, avoiding the vines, you had patched up your wounds and now you were patching up Eddie’s.
He watched as your hands worked, he was biting down on his leather jacket to keep himself from screaming, only letting out little grunts as you disinfected the area, applying the gauze.
“I’ve noticed,” You began, Eddie breathes out as you left your own finishing touches. “Dustin really looks up to you, huh?” You asked as you finished patching his wound. “That kid…yeah, yeah, I guess he does.” Eddie said. “He’s a great kid, I promise you. You should’ve seen him together with Steve.” You laughed at the duo, but your smile turned into a thin line at the mention of Steve. Eddie tensed.
You shake your head. “Anyway, I’m done.” You smiled at him, moving away to let him see. Eddie’s hands reached towards his stomach. “Thank you.” Pulling his stained shirt down, he sighs. “You think their dead?” Eddie said, referring to the demobats. “I sure hope so.”
“We’re stuck here, then?” Eddie asked. “Looks like it, doesn’t hurt to wait a couple more hours…” You answered. He nods. Minutes felt like hours as you waited.
But then the sounds of something dropping was heard, a couple, actually. You and Eddie looked at each other. “What was that?” You asked, before he could answer, you were already standing up, sliding the curtain a few inches away so you could peek through the window.
“Holy shit.” You said.
“What? What happened? What is it? (Y/N)- (Y/N)!” Eddie frustratedly says as you unlocked the door, opening it. Eddie rushes to stand, clutching his stomach. “(Y/N)!” He whisper shouted, stepping out and walking towards you.
“Look.” You spoke. He obeys, looking around he spots the mass of demobats on the ground, dead.
“What the hell?” Eddie mutters. “You think they got Vecna?” You asked, hopeful.
“Seems like it.” Eddie said, not believing the sight in front of him before looking at you. “Should we go…back?”
You debated, things looked clear so far. “Yeah, let’s go back…just be careful.” You said. Eddie does back in the house to retrieve the spear along with the shield. You slung your bag over your shoulder.
“Ready?” You asked him. “Ready.” He replies, both of you started walking away, looking at all the demobat, some were burnt to a crisp while the others just looked to have dropped dead. The smell wasn’t great either as it had you and Eddie scrunching your noses.
━━━━━━»»•••««━━━━━━
Returning to Eddie’s trailer, the two of you sat on the ground, breathing heavily. Then there was a loud thud and a groan. You and Eddie snapped your gaze inside.
“Ah, shit, that hurts.” Dustin was there.
“Henderson! I thought I told you-“
“(Y/N)! Eddie!” At the sound of your voice, Dustin’s head perks up, scrambling to get on his feet. “(Y/N)! Eddie! Oh, thank god it’s really you!” Dustin ran to the two of you, and in an instant, he bends down to hug the both of you tightly. “Op, op, op. easy there Henderson.” Eddie breathes out. You smiled, hugging Dustin back, but the closed space between you and Eddie made you feel something. Dustin pulls away, his smile bigger than before. “And you- Eddie, I didn’t like what you did earlier.” Dustin scolded him.
“To be honest, man, I didn’t either,” Eddie chuckled. “Thankfully, (Y/N) here came to my aid, thought we’re both going to be the main course of those assholes.” Eddie shows his patched up wound along with pointing at yours.
“Shit...” Dustin’s eyes widened in disbelief. “Yeah, shit.” You reply.
“You guys just about had me into having a full-blown heart attack back there.” Dustin sighs. “I’m glad you two are safe. And by the sounds of it, I think the other three are too.”
Letting out a breath, somewhere in you was relieved to find out that Steve was alright. He made it.
“Guys!” You heard someone shout from the distance. “Robin!” Dustin shouts back as you saw the trio making their way towards Eddie’s trailer. You and Eddie stood up, meeting them halfway. “How did it go?” You asked. “…He’s…” Robin trailed off.
“He disappeared.” Nancy said. “Wait what?” Dustin said. “How?”
“I don’t get it either, we burnt and shot his ass back there then he got thrown off the window, when we went to see him, he was gone.” Steve explained.
Before anyone could say anything, there was a loud booming noise, familiar to a clock chime. Vecna.
All of you looked at each other, this could only mean three things.
Vecna got Max. Four deaths. The last gate has been opened.
The ground beneath you rumbled as you braced yourself. “What the hell is happening now?!” Eddie exclaimed. “Get away, look!” Nancy said as bleaks of red through Eddie’s trailer glowed, his trailer cracked, the ground separating.
Losing your balance, your first thought was to grab somebody closest to you, that someone being Eddie. You backed away, pulling him with you as the ground shook immensely, sending you both to the ground as Dustin ran to take cover.
Eddie wrapped his arms around you as your face nestled on the crook of his neck, holding you tightly as the earthquake ceased.
Once it was over, you slowly pulled away from him, staring up into his eyes. “You alright?” He asked. “Yeah… sorry.” You apologize, sitting up when he lets you go. “Don’t be.” You caught him say before Steve spoke. “Everyone alright?”
“We’re good, man.” Eddie said as Dustin nodded.
“Guys… that doesn’t look too good.” Robin said, pointing at the reason for the earthquake. It stretched as far as all of you could see. No doubt it had already caused a massive damage in Hawkins.
“Oh man.” Dustin said.
The rest planned on how to get out of here now that there were massive gates connected to each other. You suddenly felt overwhelmed seeing Steve. You breathe out, stepping away from the scene, walking a few feet away. It dawned on you that all of you weren’t going to be experiencing things the same way now that the gates were complete. You held your head in your hands as you closed your eyes.
“Feeling any better?”
“No, honestly not. I feel like shit.”
Hearing them chuckle made you realize that it was Eddie, guess Steve still didn’t have the courage to face you, nor that he even planned to. And somehow, you find yourself being okay with that. Maybe it was time to move on. Maybe even he deserved to move on.
“When I come back there…do you think they’d still be chasing me with pitchforks and torches?” Eddie wondered, standing beside you. You laugh. “Hope not, look, if they do, I promise I’ll be the first one to defend you.”
Eddie turns a slight shade of red at that, would you really?
“Like, I guess I’ll chase them down too, with or without my crossbow.” You added. Eddie laughs. “Thank you, that means…a lot.”
“You said it yourself, right? Whatever happens, there’s no more retreating from Eddie the Banished.” Acting it out dramatically.
Eddie plays along, raising his fist to meet yours in a fist bump.
“No more.”
And that night signified a new blossoming relationship between you and Eddie. A friendship that Eddie hoped would soon become more as he wanted to get to know the real you better than anyone else can.
“Through thick and thin?” You asked. “Through hell and back.” Eddie said as the two of you turn back towards the rest of the team, planning your next move.
Earlier as you and Eddie engaged in conversation, Steve found his chest aching, not from the battle, but instead because of you. He watched as you smiled and laughed with Eddie. Steve knew he no longer stood a chance, he hated himself for letting someone like you slip off his fingers so easily. A sigh escapes his lips, looking down on the ground as Nancy, Robin, and Dustin talked.
There was nothing he could do to get you back. He wished there was, but what could he do? The damage was done. You were about to move on when he wished you wouldn’t. But how could he stop you when he hasn’t moved on himself?
Whatever happens now, Steve promised himself that as long as you were happy, he was happy. Even if it meant to hurt like hell.
ALTERNATE STEVE ENDING
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sosa2imagines · 4 months
Text
I had my dance and now I'm where I belong.
Warning- Angst, cheating and hopeful fluff. ----------------------------------------------------- Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Completed -----------------------------------------------------
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When they say love is blind it truly is blind cause all the red flags turn color blind. You had noticed changes in his behavior and you also noticed the little things he’d stop doing. Even when Bucky was in Wakanda you remained by his side like glue. Slowly he started to regain his memories and the old Bucky was back not completely though. So when he started to flirt with other girls or when someone random made a pass at him he never denied them you foolish thought he is acting his old 40s self just like Steve had told you once the evergreen womanizer so you ignored it till it was getting out of hand so one day you confronted him but he just said you are overreacting and it's cute to see you getting jealous and the confrontation would end up with a kiss followed by sex every single time when he did it again.
Thanos took a toll on all of you but thankfully everyone were back safe and sound. Tony took semi retirement and Clint too, Nat handle the tower Wanda was in and out cause Vision was in Wakanda and Steve you best friend and once upon a time crush was getting ready to return the stones. "Hey" you coo, "Hey" he beams at you "Ready?" Looking at the compass he looked at you with a sad smile "Yes as ever I will be" "Enjoy your dance Steve and know where you belong ok?" the true meaning behind your words were that you were begging him to have his dance with Peggy and to return back to you guys but that didn't happen as soon as Steve told Bucky not to do anything stupid and when he complained Steve is taking all the stupid with himself you knew he won't come back and just like that he was gone. You cried all night long and Bucky held on to you tight he was equally sad and cried along with you.
It had been fifteen days since Steve left and new recruits had joined Nat and you were training them Bucky helped in between but that didn't stop him from flirting with the girls Nat found it weird and you tried to cover it by saying he is missing Steve and everything is tough for him at the moment but Nat was not having none of it and banned Bucky from training the recruits. Soon he and Sam left on a mission in London and here begins the downfall of your relationship. "Sharon?" Bucky was shocked to see her "What are you doing here?" "Undercover Barnes shield sent me to help you guys" So just like that she was helping them and when they both got separated from Sam and their cover almost blew up Sharon thought it is a great idea to kiss Bucky and he kissed her back and one thing led to another for the time they were in London they had sex daily. When Sam found out he was furious but Bucky told him he would come clean to you but not in the way Sam had thought.
Once they were back Sharon accompanied them she told you all she was helping them in the mission. The day Bucky arrived he went straight to his old room instead of your shared one you decided to let him be it was not new for him to stay alone after a mission but for days Bucky avoided you your heart was paining the glob in your throat wanted to explode Nat was worried about you and Sharon was still living in the tower and now Bucky would only train with her and it killed you when he would talk with everyone except you day by day you were getting killed by the love of your life you would cry to sleep every night, Bucky would sleep far on his side of the bed he would only enter the room late in the night. You started to miss Steve terribly if he was here he would have helped you even kicked Bucky's ass. Weird sexual noises would come from Sharon's room but it was none of your concern except it was. Sam had enough he gave Bucky last warning to come clean and Bucky was ready as if he was tired hiding his 'relationship' with Sharon. It was like almost on purpose both of them decided to show you what was happening behind your back Bucky and Sharon were making out in your shared room you were standing there numb tears flowing freely you gave them few more minutes before opening your mouth "are you done?" Bucky sighed and got up he told Sharon to wait in her room on her way she smirked at you like she won some competition. "I’m sorry Y/n it's over I'm in love with Sharon, I have packed your bags please go back to your old room." You scoffed at him "Just her Buck? So what about those, who you flirt with?" Bucky was quiet he knew he deserve your venom. "I have loved you so deeply but James I can’t forgive you, maybe one day in the future, I have been stood by your side through every single thing that has happened to you and yet you betray me." "Can you give an hour please", he nodded and left the room. You open the packed bags just like you had thought he had packed the things he gifted you, you picked out every single of them and kept them on the bed. Once you were done it was time to face the music the time you were busy re packing since Sam and Wanda were out Bucky told Nat you two broke up hiding the real reason. So when Nat came and asked you what happened you went along with Bucky's lie but karma was in your favor Wanda and Sam had just arrived Sam called Bucky a liar Nat was confused that gave Wanda time to read your mind you begged them not to tell Tony the whole truth you were like sister to him and it took a lot of hard work and trust for Tony to forgive Bucky and you did not wanted to ruin what Steve had worked upon. "Where are you going Y/n?" Nat asks, Wanda was crying feeling your suffocating pain, Sam was saying sorry over and over for not telling you sooner but you forgave him, it's not his fault Bucky couldn't keep it in his pants. "I need some alone time Nat please I can't breathe here give me some time" "You call us everyday ok no call we will bring you back!" Wanda warned understanding your need to go away, you nodded hugging Wanda and Nat, Sam was furious "He should go not you" "No Sam please be nice to him for Steve" and with last look you left. Once the team knew about what had actually happened they gave Bucky hell for what he did to you. Bucky however was feeling very guilty for how things did go down he did love you at one point but that didn't stopped him and Sharon making things official just after a week you left. Things were awkward for him with the team.
Meanwhile in the past Steve did have his dance but he was not happy Peggy had moved on but that was not what was bothering him he was worried about you, he open his compass that had your photo truth is Peggy was his first love but you made home in his heart Peggy was only a memory he only loved you wanted a family with you but when he saw Bucky falling for you he took a step back the ever thinking about other's happiness he let Bucky take you away. Steve decided it was time to head back to his love but most importantly his best friend you.
----------------------------------------------------- Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Completed
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Text
Steddie Upside-Down AU Part 87
Part 1 Part 86
Mom’s hovering in front of the door, a knife in her hand, trying to get the rest of them to get away from the window. It’s not working. If anything, Max’s nose only presses more firmly to the glass with every request she makes.
Will’s hovering just behind her, desperate to keep Steve and Eddie in his line of sight. He can just barely see the wisp of a curl through the side window of the van, bouncing as Eddie moves around inside.
He squints, trying to keep the hair in sight as the movement becomes more erratic.
Will hears glass breaking just as he loses sight of Eddie entirely, wisps and all.
He rushes past his Mom, using the weight of his body to open the door, even as she stands in the way. It’s almost involuntary, a compulsion to follow the thread that Eddie’d pulled him by.
“Will, don’t!” she cries, but it’s too late. He’s out, and through.
Mike calls after him, too, and there’s the sound of tennis shoes stampeding out of the house behind him. Will only hopes he’s not leading them all to their impending doom.
Bodies slump into the driveway, none of them human. They’re like if the Demogorgon had followed a different evolutionary chain. Dustin would find it fascinating. Will just wants Eddie and Steve back.
Wayne’s still standing sentry, looking out across the street, waiting for more monsters to creep in from the darkness, Barbara by his side.
Shielding the entrance to the van, is El.
“El!” It’s Mike, because it always is. He sounds so genuinely elated that something curdles and dies in his throat. He swallows it down, hopes it decomposes in his stomach, so he never has to look directly at it. “You came!”
El smiles, happily at Mike, then around to all of them. “Of course.” She looks over at Max, and she’s frowning now, that way she does when she doesn’t understand something. It used to happen all the time. Now, it’s rare.
Will doesn’t care, can’t when Eddie’s too quiet in the van somewhere Will can’t see. He pushes past her, too.
There’s a misshapen, monstrous foot sticking out of the broken window. He stares at it for a second before swinging the door open. It wrenches the foot strangely, makes it crack and tear with the resistance of the door before it breaks free, black blood flowing like the thing’s still alive. 
It stays still. 
Will looks past it, and finds Eddie’s pale face.  
There’s glass in his hair, and his palms are bleeding where they’re held in front of him, but he’s breathing. Alive. And he’s looking up at El like she’s answered all his prayers. Will and Eddie have been sharing the same prayers from the same broken pews for so long that for a second, Will thinks Steve is back. 
He scrambles over the dead thing blocking his entrance. It’s cold against his palms, flesh barely giving as he crawls hand over feet atop it. But, Steve’s still just sitting there, blinking, Carol huddled into his side like he can protect her, even like this.
“Steve needs your help,” Eddie says, plaintive. Begging with both voice and unblinking eyes, gaze locked on El’s own until she breaks it to look at where Steve still sits, unbothered.
Her brow furrows, eyes squinting like she’s peeling off layers of skin and meat to get to whatever’s underneath. “He’s lost?” she asks.
Carol is squinting at El like the words aren’t clicking for her. She looks back to Steve, then back to El, brow furrowing with anger.
Eddie nods. Will clears his throat. “Not like last time,” he clarifies. “He’s here, but his mind isn’t.”
El nods, decisive. “I will help.”
“What the hell are you all talking about!” Carol demands, even as people scatter around her, setting up for El’s latest rescue mission. “He’s right there!”
She’s not looking at Will, though. She’s looking at Eddie like it’s all his fault. Still, when Steve doesn’t say anything, her lip wobbles as she turns and asks, “right Steve?”
He doesn’t answer, even as she calls again. Will looks away when she bites her lips, eyes wide.
It’s easier this time. They don’t have to break into the school, don’t have to find a pool. El just sits cross-legged in front of Steve on the carpet, careful to stay away from the broken glass and the dead thing. Mike covers her eyes with Wayne’s flannel while the man himself switches the radio dial until he finds one with enough white noise to satisfy.
He can’t quite tune out the murmured conversation between Eddie and Carol, though, no matter how hard he tries. Eddie explains, in clipped, emotionless words, that something, one of the monsters from the other place she’d just gotten a taste of, has taken over Steve. 
“But we’re getting him back?” she asks, voice shrill and breaking, contrasting with Eddie’s own even tone. A veteran to the newbie in the warzone. 
Will, suddenly, feels terribly old. 
“Quiet now,” El demands. 
Eddie looks away from Carol without answering. There is no answer to that question when they’re all subsisting off hope, and not much else.
“Tell him we’re coming, okay?” Eddie asks. He’s looking down at his own bloody palms now, like he can’t bear to look at their last bastion of hope and wait for it to flame and go out. 
“Ask ‘im how to stop the thing taking ‘im over,” Wayne interjects. 
Eddie’s lip wobbles. Will knows how he feels. He doesn’t want Steve to know, if he’s in there at all, that they don’t know what to do. Neither does Will. He wants to save Steve. He always wants to save Steve.
But, Eddie finally looks up, meeting Will’s eyes before nodding. The movement knocks a tear free, but his voice sounds clear when he says, “Ask him how we kill the fucker.”
El nods, shoulders settling as she reaches out to take Steve’s hand. The white noise blankets them all. Will settles down to wait. 
That’s what they always do, when Steve is dying: they wait. This time is no different. 
Part 88
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ambrozjas · 26 days
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Could you do a songfic with the song 'Mary' by Alex G with Dallas?
I love your writing sm it genuinely makes me happy <3 take your time with this request and have a lovely day !!
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mary is the girl that leaves you to rot ꨄ︎
✧˖*°࿐ notes 🧸ᰔᩚ
i cried makjng this n im so proud of it n i love alex g sm
✧˖*°࿐ warnings ᰔᩚ
major character death, grieving reader, weird descriptions of adrenaline because i’m obsessed with it, song lyrics r in italics !! 💕
✧˖*°࿐ word count ᰔᩚ
2276 words, 12170 characters
. ˚◞♡ ⃗ *ೃ༄ . ˚◞♡ ⃗ *ೃ༄ . ˚◞♡ ⃗ *ೃ༄ . ˚◞♡ ⃗ *ೃ༄
mary is the girl that i wanna kiss
she’s got big red eyes and big red lips
she’s got big sharp teeth and big fat hips
dallas winston was known as a lot of things. he was a hood, a filthy greaser, a pervert, an idiot. and while you had heard all of these things about him, you had never actually spoken a word to him besides a gruff, “watch where you’re going” when you bumped into him.
you took notice of the hollowness in his dark eyes, the way his hair was always tussled, the way a new purple bruise was always blooming on his cheek, the milky skin that shone through the small slit of his shirt lifting when he stretched, the fullness of his pink lips whenever a cigarette was sticking out between them, how soft they looked..
no, you told yourself. dallas winston was a no good hoodlum who couldn’t keep his hands to himself. that’s all he was, and that’s all he’ll ever be. but how wrong you’d come to be in the future.
mary is the girl that i wanna fuck
she’s got leather heart and leather gloves
over the next few weeks, your mind couldn’t help but wander about dallas. you practically analyzed every part of his being. the way his eyebrows furrowed when he struggled to light the cancer stick meticulously placed between his index and middle finger, his leather jacket creasing at the forearms in the process.
but of course, your thoughts had to be interrupted. whether that was for the better or worse, you couldn’t decide.
“hey! what’cha lookin’ at?” your friend slides up next to you on the bench, slipping out of the sun’s reach and under the tiny umbrella shielding you two as she followed your gaze. you both were at a small diner, eating outside despite the tulsa heat causing your thighs to sweat when you sat down. you didn’t mind the heat, maybe that’s why you started playing with fire by talking to dallas winston.
you muttered a quick, “nothin’” when you saw your friend roll her eyes and groan at the fact that you were watching him, dallas. you snatched the juice box that she held out to you while she continued to watch dallas with two younger kids chase a group of small kids around, shouting about in an attempt to scare them.
“i still don’t get it. yeah, he’s a bit cute but i don’t understand why you’d go for a guy like that—“
“i’m not going for anybody. ‘s it a crime to observe the locals?”
“bit creepy but,” she paused as she tsked, “not a crime.” she sighed, sipping on her own juice box once more.
she’s the only girl that i wanna love
when you had finally mustered up the courage to talk to ‘the big bad wolf’ himself, you got through the brief scoffing-at-your-attempts-at-conversation stage and actually realized that dallas isn’t all that bad. maybe he’s wore you down, maybe it’s just habit at this point, but he’s actually tolerable when he’s not around all these dumb broads who are looking for a quick bang.
it took a while. like, a long while. but dallas didn’t mind you anymore. you were no longer the pest that buzzed around his ears in hopes that you weren’t swatted away. dallas claimed he didn’t have friends, need friends. but you’re one of the closest people that would ever get a chance to see dallas the way he truly is. you had met the curtis brothers, already recognizing sodapop from school before he dropped out. you had met two-bit, an obnoxiously flirty drunk who threw teasing remarks at you and dally at night long. you had met steve, although all he did was sneer at you when you got close to him, similar to a dog with a piece of beef in its mouth.
when dallas had finally asked you out, it was curt. grumbling a small offer in an attempt to sound tougher so he would mask his awkwardness if you said no. but if you’re being honest, you couldn’t imagine being with any other boy besides dallas winston. he plagued your mind, planted like weeds that you couldn’t get rid of. whether that were his intentions all along were unknown, although you wouldn’t put it past him. dallas was an interesting guy, for sure.
listen to me baby, i don’t mind
i wanna be with you and waste my time
“y’know, you don’t have to be here right?” you asked him, watching as he blowed another cloud of smoke through the small gap his mouth provided on the other side of his cigarette occupied lips.
he merely glanced at you, his arm behind his head as he lounged about on your bed, weight crinkling the sheets.
“because if—“
“can you relax? i wanna be here, otherwise i’d get up and leave right now.” he plucked the cigarette from his mouth as he fully turned his head to look at you.
you shrugged, “i wonder what’d make me ask when you’ve said ‘i’m wasting my time’ and ‘how long are you stretching this out’ and—“
“alright, alright. i get it.”
you sat in silence for a bit, feeling a bit awkward at the fact that you pulled his card and had said nothing more. you were convinced dallas would leave once he had sat up, dusting some ash off of his dark shirt.
“how long ‘til you finish that thing?” he pointed to the paper on your desk below you, leaning his elbows against his thighs as he got comfortable in the new position.
“why? you need t’much attention?” you cooed at him teasingly, still keeping your eyes glued to the paper.
“feels like you’ve been workin’ on it forever. i don’t wanna spend my time in silence while my girlfriend is just working on her homework.”
girlfriend, you repeated in your head. he’s been getting pretty ballsy with this label thing, huh? you smiled to yourself, writing one last sentence before putting your pencil down and getting up from your desk. dallas’ eyes trailed your figure as you stood between his legs, his hands instinctively resting on your hips.
you would almost call it domestic, the way his brown eyes gazed at you. the brown eyes that were so full of disdain and resentment for the world, somehow had room for adoration whenever he looked at you. you always admired that about him.
you placed your hand on his face, before giving him his wishes and unceremoniously plopping on top of him. you couldn’t deny him, dallas winston always got what he wanted.
give it to me baby, i feel good
i wanna feel whatever you think i should
sing it for me, baby, play my song
i wanna hear your daddy sing along
“i dunno.” he said, shrugging his shoulders.
“what do you mean you don’t know?” you put your hand on your hip and looked down at dally, a cancer stick shoved between his lips as usual.
“i don’t dance, ‘specially not with losers like you.”
“hey!”
it was the perfect moment, you were at a family party with dally. you two decided to go to a small clearing behind the house, the smell of trees wafting in the air. it was distant enough that nobody would see you but it was close enough that you could still hear the music faintly blasting through the speakers.
“c’mon dal, nobody can see us. just you ‘n me.” you held out your hand, tilting your head as you offered for a final time.
he stared at it for a second, eyes flickering between your face and your hand as he cocked an eyebrow similarly to two-bit’s habit.
you scoffed and rolled your eyes. “fine, guess i’ll just go find another guy to dance with. i’m sure andy would love—“
and then came dally’s hands on your hips pulling you back towards him when you tried to saunter away back to the front of the house. you yelped as he tugged you towards him, getting up from the small white garden chair.
you laughed and threw your head back as dallas tried to twirl you, he was almost comically stiff as he did a small two-step shuffle with you in his arms.
“wow, so romantic.”
“shut up.”
you leaned forward and rested your chin on his shoulder, relaxing in his embrace as the music changed to a much slower song. you assumed the adults were slow-dancing with each other, too. you found it funny how when you were little, you would gag at anybody else doing these actions and now, you just realize how in love they were with each other.
you mumbled the lyrics a bit as you swayed in dally’s arms, resting your eyes as his hands came to sit on your waist.
dallas relaxed a bit, too. he listened to your sweet voice as you lowly whispered the lyrics from off the top of your head, mumbling incoherent phrases at lyrics you didn’t know.
if you had told anybody else about this, about how you had practically domesticated dallas winston, about how he was no longer the big bad wolf of tulsa but instead of a common dog who rested his head in your lap, they’d never believe you. they could never believe that he could be anything else besides a greaser, that’s all that mattered in this town. you cherished these moments, oblivious to the futures ahead of you and dallas.
mary is the one who leaves you to rot
she says, ‘i am real and you are not’
that phone call from dallas still haunts you. his voice was breathy, you heard him groan at the slightest shift of movement, he sounded like he was on the verge of tears.
“what did you do, dal?” you remember the way you clutched the landline, your palms had already been sweaty. one second you were hunched over a desk stressing about math homework, and the next you were pressed up against the wall as you frantically tried to get dally’s location.
you remember the way he had whispered your name over the phone. his voice cracked as he repeated it. for a while, it was ‘doll’ this and ‘baby’ that, he rarely called you by your name anymore.
“please, just tell me where you’re at dallas.” your voice was barely a whisper at that point, you were surprised at how the phone picked it up. you pressed your forehead against the wall as you begged him not to go once he told you his goodbyes. you remember how before he slammed down the phone, he let out a small cry.
“i love you.”
and then came the familiar dial tone.
you remembered feeling a pang in your heart, it was like your vision went blurry. your throat was practically coated with barbed wire as you fought back a sob, biting your fist to avoid a cry from escaping your lips, an old habit you had learned from dallas whenever he tried to hide from you.
it was nothing like the movies, where a dramatic string quartet would play in the background as you ran in slow-motion out the door. your mind couldn’t think, your thoughts couldn’t focus. your thighs started shaking as you ran out of the door, not even bothering to put shoes on.
the cool air hit your legs, creating a pebbles effect against your skin as the goosebumps raised. your legs didn’t stop, you ran until you couldn’t anymore as you followed the noise and the array of police cars that made a bee-line down the street to the old convenience store.
you remembered the burn in your nostrils and at the back of your throat, the cool air hitting both your bare shoulders and sinuses. that didn’t stop you, though. all you could think about was dally.
you remembered how your eyes couldn’t even focus on what was in front of you. all you saw was dallas, and in his hand was a gun, in replacement of his normal cigarette.
she says, ‘i am real and you are not’
you couldn’t eat after that. who could eat so casually after watching their boyfriend be gunned down right in front of them?
it’s all a blur now, your adrenaline blocking out most of the details. all you remember was crying, as shouts came from the gang, yelling about how dally was just a kid. those screams still haunt you to this day. even now, you can’t look at a pack of kools without thinking of dallas.
you understand why he did it for johnny. johnny was the closest thing dally had to a family. if he was alive now, you’d smack the shit out of him though. you weren’t selfish, nor were you a mean person, but you couldn’t forgive dallas for doing this to you.
as you laid in bed the night of his death, you remembered how dally had made promises that were soon proven to be empty about escaping this small town, to a place with no worries. you realized now how stupid it sounded, but that didn’t matter to you because you had dally. had. and now what you had was gone, lost with the solemn memories of resting against the silk pillows and whispering small words that no other person would ever get to hear, for those words would never leave that bedroom, and those words would never leave your mind either.
you know it now, that dallas was trying to just plant himself in your mind. in his own sick way, he wanted a piece of him to be left with you. and you couldn’t deny him, dallas winston always got what he wanted.
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˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ the outsiders did NOT have to go that hard with that “whatever dally wants dally got” quote
kiss kiss ˗ˏˋ꒰ 🍒 ꒱
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arlana-likes-to-write · 5 months
Note
hello I loved your avengers letters so I’ve got an angsty request
avengers x dead!reader where it’s the morning after a mission where fem!reader died back at the compound and it’s just all of the avengers grieving maybe Yelena x reader too? But I’m fine with whatever
See You Again
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Warning: mention of death, mention of injury, lots of grief, angst, thoughts of suicide, lots of guilt, drinking, self-sacrifice, character death, questionable happy ending?
Note: Thank you for the request. I wrote this faster than I thought I was going to but I loved the idea. Hope you enjoyed it.
Relationships: Avengers x reader (platonic), Yelena x reader
'An easy mission.’
‘A quick in and out.’
‘The base has been abandoned for months, years maybe.’ That was said during the debriefing about this mission. So Yelena believed it because they were the Avengers and their intel was never wrong. But they were wrong. The HYDRA base was active and the small team that consisted of you, Bruce, Vision, and Steve were overpowered. You were injured and Bruce provided medical assistance that kept you alive until they got back to the compound. But it was too late, your body was weak and you lost too much blood. The medical team did all they could but it wasn’t enough.
So Yelena sat by your side, staring at your still form, and watched the gauze that covered your chest turn red from your blood. The heart monitors stopped beating long ago and the blonde heard footsteps walk in. It was her sister. “Lena,” Natasha whispered, gently placing a hand on her shoulder. “We should go so they can clean her up.”
“She’s just sleeping,” Yelena told herself. It was a horrible lie but maybe just maybe if she kept repeating it she’d believe it and it would be true. “Right, dorogoy (sweetheart)?” She whispered and stood up to cup your cheeks in her hands. Your skin was so cold. “She’s going to wake up,” your face began to blur as tears formed in her eyes. “Natasha, why isn’t she waking up?” It didn’t take much for Natasha to pull Yelena off your still form and into her arms, trying to shield her from the pain. Yelena sobbed into her sister’s shirt and let out a heartbreaking cry.
*
Wanda flinched when the sound of Yelena’s cries echoed inside her head. “What is it darling?” Vision asked, placing a hand on top of hers that was holding a mug. Another cry and Wanda dropped the mug in Vision’s hands.
“It’s nothing,” but she looked up into his eyes and saw sadness, it was rare that the android exhibited such raw emotion. “It’s Yelena,” she whispered but it was loud enough for the other Avengers to hear it. Steve got up suddenly and headed towards the gym. “She’s not doing well,” None of them were. The news of your death rocked the compound. You were a bright light that everyone gravitated towards. There wasn’t a time when your smile or laugh wouldn’t make them feel better. With you gone, the compound was mission some warmth. Maria sighed, grabbing a few bottles of liquor from the bar.
“Is Natasha with her?” Wanda nodded. The agent poured herself a drink. “Anyone wants some?” Tony and Rhodey raised their hands. “We’ll have to have a press conference tomorrow to announce it,” Maria said, bringing the full glasses to them. “The public loved her.”
“Shouldn’t we give it some time so we can grieve her?” Wanda asked. “It hasn’t even been 24 hours.” Maria closed her eyes and Wanda watched her clench her jaw.
“I’m not asking you all to be there, I’ll do it but I rather the news breaks with us instead of someone else.” Tony scuffed. “Do you have a problem, Stark?”
“You’re making her death sound artificial like you’re using her to gain public attention,” the billionaire said.
“So are you saying you rather have HYDRA or one of the many politicians that want to dismantle the Avengers to talk about her death?” Maria asked. “So they can list every crime she’s committed and make her look like the villain.” Wanda sighed, pressing her fingers to her temples as the two went back and forth, bringing Sam and Rhodey into the argument. This was not helping. This was not what you would want.
“Enough!” Wanda yelled, her eyes glowed red. “We are all grieving and upset but she wouldn’t want us to be at each other’s throats. So everyone go calm down.” The other Avengers left and it was just her and Vision. She pinched the bridge of her nose.
“Are you alright?” Vision asked. “I know you were close with her.” Wanda saw you as a younger sister even though you were the same age. Through all the darkness the world subjected you to, you remained a bright star. You found joy in the simplest things - a thunderstorm, finding a penny on the ground, and even when Tony and Steve bickered with one another. You helped her overcome her grief.
“Just sad,” she desperately wanted to curl into a ball and cry but she was holding it together. “How are you? It must have been hard to be there.” He frowned.
“I don’t know how to feel,” he admitted. “But I wish I could have done more to save her. Part of me wishes it was me and not her.” Wanda sighed, placing her hand on top of his.
“It wasn’t your fault,” she squeezed his hand. “You did everything you could.” He nodded.
“Does it ever go away? This feeling?” Wanda gave him a gentle smile.
“Grief,” she said. “It comes and goes in waves. Some days are better than others.”
“I’ve never experienced loss because I’ve never had a loved one to lose,” he explained. “But what is grief if not love preserving?”
*
“You can’t keep doing this to yourself, man,” Sam said to the super soldier. He gave Steve time when he left the common floor and headed off towards the gym but he was gone for far too long, the pile of sandbags against the wall was a clear sign of the man’s growing guilt.
“She was just a kid,” Steve grunted and another sandbag flew off the hook.
“She knew the risk.”
“So that makes it okay?” Steve questioned, turning to face him. Sam was the fire in his eyes and he held up his hands.
“Of course it doesn’t,” he said. “But we all know the risk when we go out there and she knew it better than anyone.” The team saved you from HYDRA, similar to the Maximoff twins they experimented on you to give you powers and use them to further their agenda. They gave you the ability to manipulate Earth, you were given the nickname the Avatar. But even with all the power you were granted, you were gone. “Talk to me man,” the blonde sighed and fell to the floor.
“I don’t understand how this happened,” he whispered. “Our intel is always good. How did we miss this?” Sam sighed and sat down next to him.
“Sometimes we get it wrong. We aren’t perfect and she knew that.”
“She trusted me to bring her home.”
“And she is home,” Sam whispered, placing a hand on Steve’s shoulder. “You brought her back to her family where she was loved and safe,” Sam was trying so hard to mask how much this was affecting him. Part of him was thankful he wasn’t assigned to this mission because Helen hadn’t cleared him. Seeing you would have broken him. But what if he was there? Could he have helped save you? “We can’t save everyone even when they are on our side.” Steve bit onto his hand to keep the sound of his tears at bay but his body shook.
“She was just a kid,” Steve repeated. Sam closed his eyes, feeling the burn of tears as the normal put-together captain was crumbling.
“Yeah,” he said. “She was but she was so loved.”
*
“Hey Big Green,” Tony said walking into the lab. Bruce was sitting on the small couch, still wearing the clothes from the mission. It was odd seeing the couch so empty. The billionaire would walk into his lap late at night, ready to spend the night alone but you would be there. A book in one hand and twirling some rocks in the air in the other. Sometimes Bruce would be sitting with you, your legs over his lap. You told him you found the lab calming. He almost laughed at you, no one found this place calming.
Tony frowned when Bruce didn’t respond, to loss in his thoughts as he stared at his hands. They were still tainted red with your blood. “Come on,” Tony said, sitting down next to him. “Let’s go get you cleaned up.”
“There was so much blood,” he mumbled. Tony wasn’t sure if Bruce registered that he was there. “I tried to save her but she lost too much blood. I-” he finally looked at Tony, his eyes glossy with tears. “I’m so sorry but I tried to save her. You believe me, right?” His confession broke the walls Tony was desperately trying to hold up. The billionaire put his hand behind Bruce’s neck and squeezed it.
“I believe you,” Tony whispered. “I do.” It wasn’t enough to pull the doctor out of whatever thoughts his mind was creating. He kept mumbling, words Tony couldn’t understand and his breathing became erratic. “Bruce, I need you to breathe for me.” The last thing they needed was for him to Hulk out but he wasn’t listening. So he pulled his friend against his chest. “Copy me, okay? I need you to think of nothing except slowing down your breathing.”
It wasn’t the first time he’s had to help someone off the edge of a panic attack. You were prone to them and he got them as well. God, how the hell was the team going to recover from this? Every bruise and injury he endured never hurt this much. “Sorry,” Bruce finally said. He sounded more like himself. He used his forearm to wipe his forehead. “That was-”
“It’s okay,” Tony said. “These things happen. Today has been a lot.” The doctor nodded and the lab was quiet. Tony hated it when it was quiet, it made him uneasy. So you always found a way to fill it. Sighing, Bruce stood up and made his way to the sink to wash his hands. Tony followed him. “You know it’s not your fault. None of us blame you,” the water turned a slight pink. “You did exactly what you were supposed to do and kept her alive until you got back here.” Bruce sighed, drying off his hands.
“All I do is destroy and hurt,” he said, throwing the paper towel away. “What is the point of me being on the team if I can’t do one positive thing?”
“Bruce-”
“Just drop it, Tony. There are projects we should be focusing on,” he watched his friend walk over the to workbench. The billionaire sighed, glancing at the empty couch. He wished you were here. You were so much better at comforting others than him but you were gone.
*
“How much have you had of that?” Rhodey asked as he opened the door to the porch Maria was sitting on. An empty bottle of whiskey next to the intel they received about this mission.
“It was half empty when I started it,” she said going over the files again. What the hell did she miss? It was her job to make sure they had all the information the team needed to ensure a safe return.
“Hill,” Rhodey said, sitting in the empty chair next to her. “This wasn’t your fault. These things happen.” Maria shook her head.
“Not to me it doesn’t,” she said. “The team counts on me to keep all of you safe and I fucked up. I messed up and because of that we have to plan a funeral,” Maria clenched her jaw, forcing the tears away. She had no time to cry, to mourn, to feel anything when the people that were responsible for your death were still out there.
Maria found you so annoying when you first joined the team. It was like you didn’t come with an off switch. You had so much energy but soon Maria grew to enjoy it. She had to thank you for getting her and Natasha together. “It’s not all of you,” Rhodey said. She forgot he was there, she was so lost in her thoughts. “We all looked at the same information and saw nothing,” he was right but Maria couldn’t listen to reason. With a sigh, he stood up. “Come get me if you need anything.” It wasn’t long till Maria heard a new set of footsteps come up behind her and the arms of her girlfriend wrapped around her neck.
“Hi baby,” Maria whispered, putting her hand on Natasha’s arm. “Where’s Yelena?” The redhead sighed, placing her head in the crock of Maria’s neck.
“In her room,” she learned early on when the Black Widow’s emotions were out of control her Russian accent came out. It laced every word. “Need you.”
“You have me,” she carefully pushed her chair back to make room for Natasha. Without hesitation, the redhead climbed onto her lap and curled into her lap like a cat. She now noticed that she was wearing your long sleeve. She felt tears falling onto her shirt but she didn’t draw attention to it. Gently, she rubbed circles on her back. “I got you, sweetheart, I got you.” Maria squeezed her tight, fearing she could disappear right in front of her.
“It hurts,” Natasha mumbled. “So much.”
“I know it does. Just let it out. Don’t hold it in.” The Black Widow let out a heartbreaking sob that caused Maria to close her eyes and tears began to fall.
*
Yelena changed into one of your sweatshirts and sprayed some of your body spray onto it. It tricked her mind into thinking that you were still here, that your arms were wrapped around her. Your relationship with her was very one-sided, you were persistent in being her friend and breaking down every wall she learned to keep up. But there was a presence about you that was bright and healing. She was too weak to fight it so she let you in and you changed her life. The Red Room engraved in her head that she was incapable of love, that it was a weakness, for children. But you changed her view on it. Now she was lost.
She curled underneath the blanket in her room. She spent the majority of her time in yours, it was warmer. The walls were decorated with posters and artwork. Your bed was covered with stuffed animals. So Yelena was in her room so she wasn’t surrounded by you. Opening her laptop, she wanted to watch a movie as that was all the energy she had.
Before she pressed play an email popped up on her screen. Any other email she would have pushed it to the side or deleted it but the email was from you with a video attachment. It had to be a joke, right? Someone hacked into her email to send her this. But the press conference was tomorrow and no one on the team would do this. “Friday, what is this?” She asked the AI.
“In case of her passing, Miss. Y/n created something for you and the team. She instructed me to send it to you,” the AI explained. “I am sorry for your loss, Miss. Belova.” Of course, you would think this far in advance and make sure everyone was okay.
“Uh, can you have everyone meet me at the TV?” She asked the AI as she got out of bed. She made her way to the common area, unplugged the XBOX’s HDMI, and connected it to her laptop.
“What’s going on, Lena?” Natasha asked. Yelena looked at her sister, who was wearing one of your long sleeves. It belonged to the redhead but you claimed it as yours. Her eyes were bloodshot and she was leaning against Maria when they took their spot on the couch. The rest of the team trickled in. In Yelena’s professional opinion, they all looked like shit. She was wondering if any of them had smiled since the news broke you weren’t going to make it.
“Friday sent me something and I thought we could watch it,” it was rare that her voice was so soft. “Please,” she added on quickly. Wanda smiled.
“Yeah, of course we can,” Yelena thanked the Sokovian and made the video full screen. She grabbed the remote and sat next to her sister. Letting out a shaky breath, she pressed play.
The video began to count down similar to the way old Hollywood movies did. The screen was static and when it stopped, soft music began to play and the videos you took of them were edited together. It was one of the things Yelena found so annoying when she first met you, you recorded everything. At every press event, party, and downtime, your phone was out. In due time, Yelena learned to love it like she loved you. She never told you. You told her all the time, and the words easily fell from your lips. Every time, Yelena went to say it back, she froze. You assured her that you knew and would hold her tight. But she wanted you to hear it, now it was too late.
The video you created got the others to laugh and smile as you highlighted your favorite moments. You humanized them- showed them in a way the press never would or the public didn’t believe they could be. They were silly, goofy, and imperfect humans who made mistakes but you found a way to make them laugh. It was becoming too much for Yelena. Your voice, your laugh, your smile - it tugged at her heart. She almost turned it off but the video faded to black and then cut to you sitting on your bed. Legs crossed and a stuffed animal in your lap, it was one Thor got for you at a carnival. Yelena wasn’t sure how they were going to tell the God. But you smiled and moved the little bear’s paw to wave at the camera.
“I love you guys,” you said. “Thank you for an incredible life. We’ll see each other soon but not too soon.” You blew the camera a kiss and the video ended. Yelena wasn’t sure when she started crying but Natasha pulled her into a hug.
“I miss her so much,” the blonde whispered. How was she going to be okay when it hadn’t been a full day?
“I know you do,” Natasha said, kissing the top of her head. “It’s okay. It’s going to be okay.”
*
Vormir 2023
Yelena listened to her sister and Clint bicker behind her as she stared down the cliff. The soul stone was down there and if they wanted to bring everyone back they couldn’t leave without it. For 5 years, that was all she and Natasha wanted, to rewrite the past. All it would take was a soul for a soul. “You seem lost in thought,” the guardian appeared next to her. “Perhaps, I can provide some guidance.”
“Where will it take you?” She asked not looking away from the ground below. “Will he be stuck here or will we move on?”
“Who did you lose?” He asked instead. Yelena looked at the man, his head was tilted as he waited for her answer.
“Someone I never stopped loving and I’m ready to see again,” the man smiled with a nod.
“Then I think you know your answer,” she nodded and glanced at her sister but she hesitated. Was she ready to say goodbye? Yelena hated the Red Room for many reasons - they robbed her of her childhood, turned her into a weapon, and took every choice away from her but she got a sister. A sister that loved and protected her but she had a wife that would be waiting for her when their plan worked. And Clint, a brother she never expected to have. He had a family, 3 kids, a beautiful house, and a wife. What did Yelena have that was holding her to this world when the possibility of seeing you again outweighed everything? She let out a shaky breath and let out a whistle. Both of them stopped and looked at her.
“Don’t,” Natasha warned running after her but Yelena fell backward. What she wasn’t expecting was something to be attached to her that stopped her fall. The sudden stop made her stomach flip as she dangled on the side of the cliff. “Where the hell are you going?” She looked up at her sister.
“I’m ready,” she admitted. “You have Maria, Clint has Laura and the kids, and I want to see her again.” The sudden realization washed over Natasha, her eyes widened slightly. For 7 years, your name was rarely spoken as it hurt too much to remember you.
“Please don’t,” the redhead pleaded. “I can’t lose you too.” But Yelena saw the grip her sister had on the wire, she was slipping.
“It’s okay,” Yelena smiled, reaching into her pocket for a knife. “It’s okay. Let me go. I love you,” she looked at Clint. “Take care of her for me.” She cut the line and began to fall.
Death was something Yelena thought about a lot. She thought death was the only way she was going to escape the Red Room. Then she joined SHIELD, became an Avenger, and met the love of her life. But death took you from her. So if she needed to welcome death to see you again then so be it.
*
She wasn’t on Vormir anymore that much she knew. Instead, she stood in a space she dared to never go in for 7 years. Your room. Maria, Natasha, and Wanda took care of packing everything up and donated most of it. However, Yelena stood in your living space the same way you left it. The same decorations, the same throw blankets, and even your sneakers were by the door. What was going on? “What are you doing here?” Yelena spun around to the sound of your voice. You were dressed as you rolled out of bed, hair messy and your sleep shirt falling off one of your shoulders. But Yelena still found you breathtaking. “I thought I told all of you I didn’t want to see you for a long time.”
“I did wait. It’s been 7 years, I couldn’t wait anymore,” there were so many times Yelena had to fight the dark thoughts that invaded her mind. She knew that’s not what you would have wanted. You smirked, leaning against the fridge.
“Is that so?” You teased, holding out your hand. Yelena didn’t hesitate to grab onto it and you pulled her close. Oh, how she missed the feeling of your hand in hers. You were so close. Yelena cupped your cheeks, moving her thumb against your skin.
“I missed you so much, dorogoy (sweetheart),” she whispered.
“I missed you,” you grabbed onto her hands. “Kiss me, please.” Who was Yelena to deny you such a request? Yelena kissed you softly, savoring the way her lips felt against yours. A sigh left your mouth and you melted into her. It was all it took for the dame to break. The kiss tasted of you and salt from her tears.
“I love you,” she said against your lips. “I love you so much and I’m sorry I never said it.” You smiled, whipping away her tears.
“You didn’t have to say it, baby, I always knew,” you kissed her forehead, nose, and lips one more time. “Loving you has been the greatest gift I’ve ever received. I treasured it every single day,” Yelena kissed you again. “I’ll make breakfast and you can watch them.”
“Them?” Yelena questioned. You untangled yourself from Yelena and grabbed the remote that rested on your counter. You turned on the TV. The blonde’s jaw dropped as she watched the team gather in Tony’s lab as Bruce persuaded the team to let him be the one to bring everyone back. “Is this real?” You hummed, starting to make French toast.
“I’ve been watching you guys all this time. You did good, Lena. I think your ledger is clear.”
“Do you think so?” She asked. You nodded.
“I do. Now go watch over them and I’ll bring over the food when it’s done.” Yelena followed your instructions without any hesitation. She sat on the couch with her legs crossed, and eyes glued to the TV. She was mostly watching her sister, her green eyes were bloodshot. She hoped she understood why it had to be her. You placed two plates on the coffee table and grabbed Yelena’s hand.
“So,” the Black Widow took a bite. It was good, just how she remembered when you would make them on a Saturday morning. “How does this all work?” She waved the fork around the room. You shrugged.
“Not sure. I haven’t thought about it that hard,” you took a bite of the food. “I’ve just been going with the flow.”
“For 7 years?” Yelena questioned. You didn’t answer and she had to squeeze your hand to pull you out of wherever you went.
“It hasn’t felt like that long,” you said. “Like I know time has been passing because of what I was seeing,” you pointed at the TV. “But I never aged and everything I needed just appeared.”
“Did it hurt? Were you scared?” You sighed, dropping her hand to grab a blanket. It was the same blanket Wanda gifted to you. She saw her using it on movie nights.
“I don’t remember much of that day. But I wasn’t scared, I think I was ready. My soul knew it was my time,” you covered yourself and her with the blanket. “What about you? Were you scared?”
“A little,” she admitted. “I was worried I wouldn’t see you.” You smiled and leaned into her side.
“Well, you’re here now and you aren’t allowed to go anywhere.” Yelena chuckled, kissing your head and putting her arm around you.
“Yeah,” she sighed. “I’m not going anywhere.”
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rogerswifesblog · 1 year
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Ok playing on the secret girlfriend thing: what if she's his emergency contact and the first time the team meets her is when she's called because Steve got injured. Cue the avengers meeting a heavily pregnant girlfriend/ fiance
Oh yes-I got a request about something similar and I think I’ll post it today or tomorrow, I’ve already started writing it👀
Steve’s a very careful man, when it comes to his girlfriend, well, fiancé.
He’d be scared of loosing you. You made him realise, he could actually be a normal man besides being a national hero; Captain America.
Even though he was a super soldier and healed much quicker than a average person, you still liked taking care of his cuts, when he cut his finger helping you with cooking-but it was also the reason he was banned from the kitchen.
He may be Captain America, but deep down, he was just Steve, the clumsy Brooklyn boy, you’ve totally fallen for. And who could cook for dear life.
You always massaged his tense shoulders and back.
You treated him like a normal human being-that’s why he didn’t want you to be a part of his life as Captain America. He wanted you to himself. And he wanted to spend the rest of his life with you.
Steve even thought about putting the shield down and moving with you, somewhere where you two could just be yourselves. Happily together.
It’s not like nobody knew about you relationship-your family knew. And they loved Steve. Especially your grandma. She always sat down with Steve and they talked about the old times. Your mother loved him too. She saw how good he treated you. And the two women also loved how much he could eat. Your grandma loved having him over, because she could prepare much more food, than she’d Normally would. Even your dad approved-especially after Steve let him drive his motorcycle a few times.
They wanted him in the family.
Then it finally happened.
After being together for two years he asked you to spend the rest of your life with him.
Without a second of hesitation you said yes.
A few weeks later he noticed your odd behaviour. You slept more, eat stuff you’ve normally wouldn’t even touch-for example olives. You didn’t like them, he knew it, because you always left them for him. And then there was this constant morning sickness…
Only a few days later you told him you were pregnant, giving him a shirt, with a text on it, saying; best dad ever.
He cried tears of joy, hugging you for a long time and talking to your tummy, even though your baby was still only a the size of a little bean.
Steve watched your belly grow, getting rounder. The first time your baby kicked-actually kicking his cheek-he looked slightly offended and then surprised at your stomach. “Oh god-did she-“, you nodded, grinning at him. He started kissing you and your belly softly.
Once again he cried, like like many times in the last few months. He’d never thought he could have this, a family, a normal life.
What he hadn’t expected was a emergency mission, about a HYDRA basis in Europe, with apparently many hostages.
He had to go.
But after two weeks he still hadn’t texted you. The worst scenarios played out in your head. It happened. Steve wouldn’t come back.
You’d be a single mom, not even married, because you fiancé had to-
Your phone ringing interrupted your pacing, while you were stroking your belly, to calm down your sweetheart. It’s like your baby felt your anxiety and was as you were.
“Oh god, Steve, I was scared”, you cried into the phone, when you saw his contact pop up. But it wasn’t Steve’s voice that answered. “Excuse me, this is doctor Cho. You’re Steve’s emergency contact and-“ “I-I’m on my way.” You said, already putting on your shoes, which wasn’t all that easy having a stomach the size of a watermelon. This child was huge. It’s definitely Steve’s kid. There was definitely some kind of serum in this child.
It took you forty minutes till you finally entered the Stark tower. Normally you’d drive faster, but you didn’t want to risk anything happening.
Pepper Potts was the one coming for you-she definitely looked surprised, but tried not to show it. You knew Steve hadn’t told anyone about…well, you.
“Steve’s emergency contact-“ “Y/N, yes. I’m…im his fiancé”, you said, feeling blood rush to your cheeks, while you gently rubbed over your round tummy. Pepper smiled friendly and nodded. “Great, let’s go then”, with that you entered the elevator, letting the AL bring you to the needed floor.
She looked at your round stomach for a moment, a wide smile on her rosy lips. Especially when she saw the ring in your hand, when you rubbed over your tummy, where your babygirl was kicking.
“What happened to Steve? Is he-“ “he’s alive, but hurt. During the mission he tried to get all hostages out of the building-after getting the last one out he run back in, nobody know why. Then the building collapsed and they couldn’t find him for two days. Three of his ribs are broken, his leg and he had a concussion-they also had a scare his kidneys would fail, but luckily they manage to stop any more damage. Hes just out of surgery-we would have called you sooner, but it all happened so quickly, nobody really ex-“, pepper broke her sentence abruptly, looking away. “Nobody expected him to have a emergency contact?”, you asked quietly.
Pepper nodded, already apologising, but you dismissed her smiling, telling her you knew, they didn’t know about you.
Walking into Steve’s room, your gaze fell on all the avengers sitting around him. Everyone seemed to be bruised and injuries, but nobody looked as bad as Steve.
You gasped quietly, making everyone look at you.
Only the beeping of the monitor could be heard. Bruce immediately stood up, offering you his chair, making you smile kindly, while your eyes filled with tears.
Everyone just watched you sit down. They were surprised. Shocked even.
How could Steve hide a girlfriend-a pregnant girlfriend for this long? Looking at your round belly it had to be at least seven months. Maybe more.
Tony was the first one to talk. “So nobody’s gonna talk about Steve’s apparently knocked up girlfriend, who he kept-owch”, pepper slapped the back of his head, making him wince. You chuckled quietly.
Steve had told you, Tony was very….Tony.
But it felt good, to laugh after having been scared for so long.
“I’m actually not his knocked up girlfriend-“, all eyes were on you. Shocked-only Natasha seemed to have a cocky smirk on her face, because she saw the ring on your finger. You lifted your hand, showing it to the others. A bright smile on your face. “I’m his knocked up fiancé.”
The team laughed quietly, already loving you.
There were many more questions about your relationship and baby-and just about you.
After about two hours Steve started waking up, feeling a hand holding his, he gently squeezed, interrupting your story about how Steve once nearly set the kitchen on fire.
“Oh god, Steve”, you gasped, watching his eyes flutter open. Slightly confused he looked at you, then at the other. Under the bruised skin you could tell he was blushing. He cleared his throat. “I guess…I guess you meat the team”, he mumbled, feeling how dry his throat was. Bruce gave you a cup with water and a straw, for you to help Steve drink something. “Yes, Steve, I was just telling them how you set the kitchen on fire-for the first time” “first time? How often did it happen?”, interrupted Tony you, making Steve whine quietly. Tony wouldn’t never forget about it-not after Steve nearly set his kitchen on fire, too.
“But Steve, really. You should’ve bring your midgardian girlfriend in sooner. She’s great”, Thor said, patting his leg with more force that necessary, making Steve wince.
After Steve drank enough, you put the cup away. “Why did you run back into the building?”, you asked him, gently squeezing his hand. He looked away for a moment, but then back at you. “I nearly lost the picture”, he mumbled, confusing the team. You knew what he meant; the first ultrasound.
Sighing you gave him a gentle kiss on the forehead, sitting on the bed next to him, and putting his hand on your belly. “You’ll never do that again, do you hear me? A picture is not worth losing your life, got it? Our girl needs her daddy in her life. And the next time you do something this reckless, I’ll kick your ass. Pregnant or not”, you mumbled everything gently, making him swallow hard. The others watched amused, while Steve nodded. “Yeah okay”, you raised your eyebrows.
“Yes, Ma’am, I’m sorry. It won’t happen again-“
“Oh we’re so keeping her-owwch, Pepper!”
😍
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rogersideup · 9 months
Text
Nice to be Kneaded
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Chapter eleven
Courage
Series masterlist
Previous Part: The Snap Next Part: Homecoming
Word Count: 5,845
Warnings: My blog is 18+ only. All minors or blogs without an age in bio will be blocked. Minors DNI. Mentions of loss, abuse, PTSD, anxiety and depression.
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Steve was enraged.
Even after Thanos dusted away half of all living things, blipping away half of all of his loved ones he still didn't feel quite this angry.
He was pretty sure that if he was an animated character, his skin would be firetruck red with puffs of dark grey smoke blowing out of his ears. There would be squiggly black marks around his feet as they quickly stomped across the compound showing how the force of his steps rattled the ground with every stride, effectively and dramatically carrying him to exactly where he needed to be.
The second Steve opened his mouth, the words in the white speech bubble above his head would be replaced by numbers, punctuation marks and octothorps. He had nothing nice to say, and his voice would only come out at one volume until he got exactly what he wanted. Loud.
This anger all started the second his phone dedicated to you rang and he was met with chaos and clinking gun metal on the other line. He heard the familiar clicks of handcuffs, he heard your cries and the questions you were asking out of fear.
He heard the way you weren't read your Miranda Rights, he could tell they had wrongly used force and pulled weapons on you. He didn't even know who they were at first.
So he enlisted the help of Natasha, one of the only other people living at the compound with him at the moment that was available to help him track you down. It took a few days, and every passing moment made him feel sick to his stomach knowing every minute he didn't know how to help you was a minute you were in the custody of some branch of government that was obviously in some sort of power trip.
On the morning of day three of the search, Nat peeled herself away from the laptop for a little while to take a shower and properly get ready for the day right after Steve did, then she came rushing back into the private sector office area with a spring in her step.
"Rogers, you're never going to believe who I just found." She declared with urgency. Steve's head popped up, eyes wide and hopeful. "Just passed by intake, they were booking her."
"Like... HERE?!" Steve questioned, jumping out of his seat faster than she could even answer the question.
"Yeah, literally downstairs." She followed his fast steps down the corridors.
"You're telling me shield agents were the ones who did that to her?" He asked again, smoke building up in his head.
"Go easy on em' Cap, you know they're just following orders." Nat tried to ease his anger. "You know they had to respond to a report."
"They didn't have to respond with a bigger crime than the one she committed in the first place." He puffed, stomps growing louder, fists wound tightly.
By the time he made it to intake, he slammed the door open with enough force to make everyone in the lobby jump out of their own skin. Natasha was surprised it managed to stay on the hinges.
His voice projected loudly, bouncing off each starkly white wall, booming enough to break the florescent lightbulbs above head.
Nat approached the front desk and tapped her nails against the wood, letting her head rest in her hand while she waited for Steve to be done yelling at everyone around him so she could talk some actual legal sense into these imbeciles.
To her surprise, Steve was actually making really good points, using really big words, and his knowledge on the legal side of what was actually here lined up. Which made her job easier in turn, but she was ready to bargain for you nonetheless.
Fourty five minutes.
That's how long it took for Steve to chew out everyone directly involved in the whole ordeal. Every detail he got out of the circumstance in which you were detained made him progressively more and more angry.
Natasha did eventually take over after those forty five minutes and used every detail she just learned, every broken rule in the sun and threw it right back in their faces. Jobs we're lost, livelihoods we're threatened, and a chain reaction was sure to ensue the moment they got their hands on some help from Rhodey.
He vowed to help start an investigation on the corrupt agents that did that to you.
Once Steve ensured you were free to go with a complete scrubbed criminal record including that one speeding ticket you got for going 35 in a 25 zone, he calmed down to a more reasonable state of being.
The smoke from his ears was now nothing but red in his cheeks with little white diagonal lines emphasizing the crease in his angry brow.
Steve and Nat sat heavy in seats like stone while they continued on further. The government needed to make up for what they did to you, and quite honestly, they owe you one for keeping one of its greatest protectors safe for so long in the first place.
At the hour and a half mark, a deal came into agreement, and Steve was squirming in his seat to go and rescue you from the holding room he knew you were locked up in.
It was so hard for him to know you were just down the hall and not be able to go sweep you off your feet and try to put a bandage over the damage he had inadvertently caused you.
This was his fault. And his own mind made sure to remind him of that over and over and over again.
If it weren't for his lack of control around you, you would've been innocent and happy baking cookies and living a life in which none of this was ever even a possibility for you. The least he could've done was be an advocate for your innocence, and get you home.
What he didn't stop to consider was that you were absolutely terrified. Actually, terrified could only describe the surface level of emotions you were feeling.
It had been three days since any of your needs were met all the while being manipulated by people much more powerful than you, and triggered by the behaviors of the men who had you in custody.
You didn't even know where you were, not the building, not the city, not the state. You hadn't eaten anything the entire time you were in custody, and anytime you even tried to sip on water, you couldn't hold back your sobs long enough to choke it down.
There was a lot of time to process your arrest. It was the first time in your life you had even seen a gun in person, let alone have 6 fully automatic weapons pointed directly at you all at once. Harsh hand prints were bruised onto your shoulders, waist, and all over your arms. Your knees were bruised and scraped, your entire face hurt from crying for so long, your back was thrown out, and you were just exhausted.
Along side not eating or drinking, you also weren't sleeping much. It was taking a physical toll on your body.
You also had time to ponder if your time with Steve was worth all of this, because when it all started you thought you were facing county jail and a fine. Not being abducted by the government and starved. You determined that he was worth every star in the sky, and you'd put up with this for as long as your body would allow it to.
But you couldn't deny that the time and distance apart from him was making you feel as though you were so tiny and insignificant in the world he lived in. And if he was out there somewhere, you doubted that you even took up space in his mind anymore. So much of your life had changed since he left, and every day you feel further and further from that girl he loved once upon a time, and all things considered, you were just you.
He wasn't just him. He was a superhero, a role model, a life saver, a war fighter. If your life had significantly changed for you as an every day civilian, you could only imagine he also felt like a whole different person than the man you loved too. He was on the front line, and you were in the very back line.
It wasn't his fault that you felt so far away from him, honestly, it was probably yours. Pushing yourself further and further away from the truth that losing him in your daily life had led you towards so much pain.
You were quite literally at your lowest, hungry and crying on the floor of a temporary cell you were pretty sure was just supposed to be an interrogation room.
There was a table and a chair in there, but you didn't feel safe enough to even sit in the stainless steel trap. You stayed curled up in the corner, desperately trying to stay awake. Jumping at every sound, flinching at every passing footstep, uncontrollably crying at every agent who came in to talk to you.
Every once in a while there would be hours in between anyone coming to check on your state of being, and you'd convince yourself it was better that way. Anything was better than being transported and man handled again.
No matter how scared you were, at some point your body completely shut down and forced your mind to sleep, only to be woken up hours later by a slam so loud it shook the ground and yelling you could hear loud and clear through the door.
The anger and volume in which the shouting happened caused your whole body to tremble like a chihuahua in one of those sad shelter commercials.
Convincing yourself to just breathe through the fear, you were able to pick up a few phrases that made you stop thinking about everything but those words entirely.
"My criminal record was fully scrubbed, there's no reason for her to be punished for anything she did. It doesn't matter anymore."
"You guys are treating her like she killed people, all she did was treat me kindly"
"Lay your hands on her one more time and I swear on everything that I'll bust her out of there and never come back."
You couldn't believe what you were hearing, and you didn't want to believe what your gut was telling you. And if it was who you thought it was, you never imagined you'd hear him shouting like that.
Not wanting to believe either of those possibilities were true, not wanting to get your hopes up or become even more hurt, you covered your ears with your cuffed hands and hid your face in your injured knees.
When the time came and an agent placed the key to your cuffs into Steve's palm, he started walking towards your holding room faster that he's ever walked before. Natasha stayed behind and decided to wait in the lobby to give the two of you space.
Getting Steve to talk about you was like pulling teeth, and that's exactly how Nat knew the extent of how precious you were to him. If she hadn't previously met you, she didn't know if at this point she would even be aware of your existence.
When you heard steps approaching, and saw shadows of feet under the door, you covered your ears tighter, and sunk your face deeper into your legs.
You hated the sound of the security code being typed into the keypad, and you despised the click of the door unlocking and opening even more.
But when it did, just as always you cried a little harder, and flinched at the approaching footsteps. This time was different though, as you waited for an agent to start yelling at you, it never happened.
Steve's heart broke as he opened the door and saw you curled up in the corner. This wasn't the happy reunion he had dreamed of since the moment he left, but it was even more bitter sweet than saying goodbye to you.
You had been through a lot and all on your own, arguably more than him. You were smack dab in the middle of one of the biggest traumas of your life, all while being triggered by passed events.
He understood that he was probably one of the last people you wanted to see right now, he even understood that you would be terrified of him right off the bat. You had just listened to him rudely yelling at everyone under the sun for a while, one of your biggest triggers and fears was loud, disruptive men.
The second he stepped in he considered turning right around and getting Natasha to come remove your cuffs and bring you up to their private sector. Maybe you'd feel less on edge around a woman, especially one you trusted and had bonded with once before. But he also didn't want you to feel ignored by him, he didn't want you realizing you were in his place of living without seeing his face or being made comfortable by him.
So he did his best to take the most gentle approach he could. He closed the door behind him so softly it wouldn't make a sound, he walked so carefully as to not make a single thud with his food as if he was sneaking up on an enemy in battle.
Every step closer he took, you could still tell someone was in the room with you, so you tried to push yourself deeper into the corner hoping it would swallow you whole and you'd completely disappear.
You physically couldn't get yourself to look up until someone unusual happened. Whoever was in the room with you had cautiously sat on the floor in front of you and settled in.
"Hey, Sunflower" The calm and comforting voice filled your ears.
Your eyes snapped open, full body chills rushed over your skin as you peaked through your eyelashes, still unwilling to lift your head. In front of you sat Steve, you had never felt so much relief in your entire life for a multitude of reasons.
He looked different. A clean shaven face and a shorter hair cut, scar on his forehead, his usual street ware was replaced with jeans and a nice button down flannel. You assumed this version of him was a lot more typical than the version of him you knew, but he was still so handsome this way.
"I'm so sorry this happened" He apologized, his voice even quieter and more comforting than before. "Is it okay if I take your handcuffs off?"
It had been awhile since you spoken a single word, and right now you didn't even know what to say to him.
Although you knew he would never hurt you, and you were relieved to have him with you now, your brain still wanted to push everyone away. It was in flight or fight, and getting it to listen to your heart saying that he was safe to be around was hard.
But he knew that, and that's why he was maintaining a gentle approach. He vividly remembered that night he got a glimpse of the full extent in which men in your life had scarred you. He knew you'd need some time to warm up, you needed your needs met, you needed a few hours to not feel so scared anymore.
You nodded before reluctantly letting go of the sides of your face and holding your wrists out to him. Steve reached out slowly and unlocked the mechanism allowing them to pop open. He gently took them off your wrists and put them on the floor, revealing your irritated red skin beneath where they once clung to your body.
"Gosh, they put those on so tight" He winced looking at your wrists. "Does it hurt?"
You nodded once again, your tears now fell because you forgot what it was like to be around someone who genuinely cared about you.
"Can I?" He asked, sticking his hands out towards yours.
You hesitantly placed your shaky hands in each of his, desperately trying to get your mind to recognize that he wasn't going to hurt you, trying so hard to think of any words you could say to him.
He very delicately moved his hands upwards to your wrist, and carefully massaged where the cuffs once were. It felt so nice, you wanted to melt into a puddle on the floor.
"Does that feel better?" He questioned with a worried expression on his face. When you nodded once more, he continued. "Do you know anything about where you are?"
This time you shook your head.
"You're in New York, upstate." He explained to you. "This is a criminal intake center meant for agent interrogation here at the Avengers Compound. I live in this building but I had no clue you were here until an hour and a half ago."
You slowly lifted your head but kept your eyes fixed on your wrists in his hands. Teeny tiny baby steps, but it made him happy.
"I was looking for you since you called, came down as soon as I heard." He continued. "I got it all squared away for you, okay? You don't have to worry about anything. Your criminal record has been completely scrubbed, and you're free to go."
You finally made eye contact, then your mind went crazy again. You didn't have an ID on you, no money, no cards, not even a phone or access to a computer. Then the words finally came to you in a moment of worry. "I don't know how to get home"
"It's okay" he reassured you. "When you're ready and if you're okay with it, I'll bring you to my place. We'll get you settled and I'll fly you home. Is that alright?"
"Thank you" You cried, the words came out broken.
"I'm so sorry." He apologized again. "I'm disgusted by the way this was handled, this should've never happened."
"Not your fault" You squeezed your eyes shut and shook your head.
"And I'm sorry you had to hear me yelling like that, I know that probably scared you. I know it'll take some time to settle down from all of this, but I'm here for you. Whatever you need, I'll make it happen, okay?"
"It's okay" Your voice still broken.
The more he spoke, the more you calmed down. You felt almost immediately safer and more grounded in his presence, everything you were worried about before had flown out of the window. He was exactly the same, and it started to feel like no time had passed at all.
The more fear that left your body, the more you wanted to hug him, kiss him, just have him in your arms again. But honestly you felt disgusting and definitely didn't look the best.
"Are you alright, did they hurt you?" He asked, feeling genuinely concerned about the way the agents handled you.
You nodded before rolling up the loose sleeve of your hoodie, revealing the marks your body was littered in. A darkness settled in his eyes as he took in the state of your body, then you lifted the hem of show him the small of your waist, also covered in black and blue hand prints.
"If they didn't already lose their jobs, I'd be losing mine right about now." He admitted his anger. "Do you feel like you need some medical help? We have private doctors, they're very nice. I could stay with you the whole time."
Your heart warmed that he remembered another one of your fears, but you still shrugged. "I don't know what I need."
"That's okay" He continued massaging your wrists. "How about we get you out of here and more comfortable at my place then we'll reassess in a bit?"
You nodded in agreement, feeling so thankful that this mess was over and that Steve lived so close. Just as you were about to get up, he slipped in more comforting words.
"I know this is an awful circumstance, but I really am so happy to see you." He admitted.
You slid your wrists out of his hold to grab his hands with yours instead. "I'm happy to see you too" You nodded, more tears falling down your cheeks. "I didn't really even know if you were alive until now."
His eyes softened as he realized he hadn't been seen in the public eye since Thanos snapped, and all his attempts to reach out to you had failed in one way or the other. You didn't even get to know that he did answer the phone when you called.
"I'm so sorry" he cautiously apologized. "You can't get rid of me that easily"
"Thank goodness for that"
Steve stood up and held his hands out for you, you took them once more and he very carefully helped you up. You stumbled upon standing, getting used to being up on your own feet again while feeling so weak from lack of anything in your body, but you caught your balance.
"I've got you" Steve reassured once again. "Everyone is gone by the way, it's just Natasha out there waiting for us."
"What happened to everyone else?" You asked, trying hard not to externally flinch every time Steve moved, his hand cautiously and lightly resided on your lower back. You could tell he was worried that you would fall or else he definitely wouldn't be touching you right now.
"Getting fired" Steve answered honestly, guiding you out of the door.
As you stepped out of the room and turned the corner of the hallway out into the main reception area, you saw Natasha who lit up with a warm smile.
"Sugar cookie, you poor thing" She approached, reaching out to you slowly, squeezing your shoulders before tucking some of your hair behind your ears. "I'm so happy you're okay."
The nickname reminded you of Sam that one night that felt like lifetimes ago, and it pulled your lips upwards into the tiniest smile that prevailed through the tears.
"It's nice to see you again, Nat" You tried to keep up the smile in attempts to be warm to someone who meant a lot to Steve, but it was impossibly hard. "Thanks for the help."
"Of course, anytime." Nat nodded, stepping in front of you to lead you back to their home.
No matter how exciting a grand tour of the fucking Avengers Compound would've been for a small town girl like you, there was an unspoken agreement that now was not the time.
Steve didn't even really find it appropriate to show you around the living space yet before ushering you straight to his room, and getting you set up for the only thing you could actually express want for which was a shower.
After some reassurance that he would be right there waiting for you when you were done, you let hot water calm you before changing into the comfort of Steve's clothes and shyly walking into his room.
It was a lot bigger than you had anticipated, and so much cozier that you thought was possible in a building that felt so cold and mechanical. And just as promised, he was there for you. He sat on his bed, back against the headboard, laptop in front of him and he was talking to someone on the phone.
You listened as you slowly walked over, still feeling like your guard was up and three miles high.
"Yes, we have her." Steve said. "I can confirm she's very much alive and doing okay- relatively unharmed... yes sir.... I'll have her home soon. Yes sir... okay, thank you."
He hung up the phone and put it on his bedside before closing his laptop and doing the same, then all his attention was back on you with a kind grin across his lips.
Unexpectedly to Steve, you walked right up to him. He looked at you with a little concerned pinch in his eyebrows before you got on the bed and wrapped your arms tightly around him.
"Awwwww" Steve audibly cooed, uncontrollably smiling and very cautiously wrapping his arms around your back. "Sweet girl."
"I missed you, baby." You said quietly, hiding your face in the crook of his neck.
"I missed you too, so so much" He rubbed comforting stripes down your spine. "I'm so happy to have you here. Are you starting to feel better?"
"A little" You confirmed.
Just in the very short amount of time you've spent since reuniting, even in your scared, clouded brain you could see the guilt looming over Steve and Natasha's heads. You didn't even know if you should bring up what happened, or how to even begin asking him how life has been treating him since the last time you were together.
"It's gonna take some time." He told you as a reminder to keep being easy on yourself. "I just got off the phone with the chief of police in Greenwood, apparently nobody filled them in on the situation so there's been a search party out for you for two days now."
"Can we just tell everyone I was kidnapped?" You asked, half joking. "That's easier than what actually happened."
"I would 100% count that as an abduction."
"And I was saved by Captain America and Black Widow."
Steve giggled and pressed a kiss into your temple. A comfortable silence fell over the two of you, fully letting each others bodies comfort your minds as the passed few months had been nothing but painful.
But you found the courage to lift your head and look at his face, your heart was beating out of your chest even just by really looking at him.
The fading scar, his big blue eyes, the bare cheeks you weren't used to seeing. It all told a story of what he had been through, and your couldn't even begin to grasp it. You were lying in the arms of a man who had just been hurt by the hands of the titan who destroyed half the universe. He had seen the unimaginable, been hurt by beings you'd never even come close to, fought battles for the sake of the universe with the two hands that were holding you close.
It suddenly felt so stupid to be so emotionally destroyed over the nature of your arrest, especially when he was looking right back at you.
"You look good, honey." You complemented, bringing your hand up to trace the scar on his forehead. "A lot different, but still so beautiful."
"I think you've gotten even prettier" Steve complemented.
"Wow, that's shocking" You genuinely smiled. "All I've been doing for the passed few months is staying inside and eating spicy Doritos."
"They're so much better than the normal ones" Steve commented.
"Right?!" You agreed. "Dare I ask you how you've been?"
Steve sighed, his lips pressed into a straight line. "I'll tell you all about it when you're in a little bit of a better place, but all you need to know about it right now is that after it happened I made sure you were still here the very second I could, then after that we just kept trying and haven't stopped since."
"So you've been busy?" You questioned, once again feeling warmed over his thoughtfulness and genuine care over your well-being.
"Yeah, I've been busy." he nodded. "And for whatever it's worth, I hope you've been okay despite what happened."
"I think we're all just trying our best, and that's all we can do."
Steve nodded, trying to think of words to acknowledge the Avengers failure. He promised they would keep you safe, and although you're right here in front of him, there was a 50% chance you could've been gone. Even after you survived the blip, you still were put in a situation that was unsafe by people who worked under the same wing as him. Not only did the Avengers fail, but he failed you.
Now you were here with him, in a place he never would've imagined you in. Your body covered in bruises and his sweatpants, red eyes and nose, and a sad facial expression that would take a while to dissolve.
He really thought that getting absolved of his crimes from the civil war would wash away the guilt he's always felt since as long as he could remember, but now he had a whole new criteria in front of him. A whole new binder stuffed full of pages written with ways he's fucked up, hurt and lost the people he loved. Each page was laminated and slotted into plastic sheet protectors just to make sure he never forgot what was said and done.
His mind ran away from him, guilt ate him away until he felt your soft lips on his and it pulled him right back. Closed eyes and a sigh of relief, being with you was the first time in a while he felt any sense of control. It was as though he was a helium balloon floating through the air, and you caught him and tied the string around your wrist.
"You tried your best, too." You reminded him, seeing his internal battle. Your lips brushing against his.
"We killed him." Steve blurted out. "We lost, but we killed him."
You sat up slightly, trying to process this information. It was obvious the public wasn't being informed of everything, and although Steve wanted to protect your peace, he just couldn't keep that information in.
"What?" You blinked, cocking your head to the side.
"Thanos." Steve confirmed. "We went to a planet that he was hiding away on and we killed him."
You weren't sure what he wanted you do get out of that information, or where he was going with it, but you tried your hardest to understand.
"I was just so... angry. I was thinking about you, and I lost Sam, Bucky- we thought if we got the stones back we could just snap again and everyone would come back but when we got there, they were destroyed. We missed them by one day." Steve explained. "That was our second and only chance, we failed twice. Thor took his head clean off."
"Steve-" you started, but he cut you off.
"We're not giving up but spirits have been very low, morale around here has never been so drab, and I think that's why those agents took their anger out on you. Everyone is just angry."
"Im not angry." You told him.
"I'm sorry" Steve apologized, shaking his head. "You've been through hell and back recently, and I feel like all of it has been because of me, and I'm sorry for that."
"None of this is your fault" You denied. "And I'd do it a thousand times over for you, Honey. You tried your best, you've always done the best you've could and you've done great things because of it. I'm thankful for you."
"Who did you lose?" He asked.
"It doesn't matter" Just like he felt the need to protect you, you needed to protect him. "Not right now at least."
He nodded, understanding where you were coming from. "What is Greenwood like?"
"Well," you sat up more and grinned. "Everyone was very excited that good ol' Cap was in town so your driveway is full of love letters and flowers just for you."
"Awwwww, did Georgia leave me one too?" He joked.
You audibly laughed out loud, "the only thing Georgia sent you was me."
"No way" His eyes got big, mouth hung open.
"Way" you nodded.
"She reported us?" He questioned, stunned at this information.
"Then watched me get taken away, drinking tea like it was a bucket of popcorn at the movie theater." You explained.
"That little-" Steve started, but stopped himself before puffing out a breath. "Ugh! Why!?"
You giggled at his discipline, "not everyone can handle all of your greatness, baby."
"Yeah, yeah." Steve rolled his eyes. "Should I go knock on her door when I get to Greenwood and tell her about how you were found innocent?"
"I think she would beat you with a fly swatter" You smiled.
"I've been shot a few times, I think it would be worth the beating to see the look on her face." Steve giggled.
"Always up to no good, baby." You shook your head with a playful grin.
"It's what I'm known for" Steve agreed.
"I have a question." You said shyly, hands playing with the fabric of his flannel button up.
"What's up?" He welcomed your curiosity.
"So, you're going to take me home but is there anyway you can stay? Even just for a day or two?" The thought of leaving him so soon after you had just got him back was hurting your heart.
"You know, I actually had a visit to Greenwood planned in a week? It was on the team calendar and everything." He told you.
"Really?" You smiled, just the thought made you happy.
"Yeah, I made myself unavailable for the Avengers for three weeks. I thought some time away from here and time with you would be good for me." He explained. "But I'll talk with the team and see if I can just extend it."
"Even if you can't, I'm more than happy now"
"I was thinking maybe you can stay the night here and I'll take you back tomorrow morning? I know it's been a long few days and you probably just want to go home but, if you think you need a doctor there's one just down the hall." He explained.
"Anything to spend more time with you" You nodded, resting your head on his shoulder.
"Maybe Georgia unknowingly did us a favor. Because know you're completely clean of any crime and we finally get a few more minutes." Steve grinned, kissing the top of your head.
"And when you come back to Greenwood we won't have to hide anymore." You pointed out.
"I'm so happy" Steve couldn't control his smile. "But I'll be even happier once I know you're okay."
"I'm feeling so much better now" You admitted. Hungry? Yes. Exhausted? Absolutely. But, "I always feel so safe when you're around."
"I love you so much" He held you just a little tighter, with more confidence it wasn't going to scare you.
"I love you too" You nuzzled into him.
"Okay, now let me catch you up on everything you need to know before being around the Avengers for a day..."
"Oh no" You settled in for what you assumed would be some interesting pointers as he reached for a throw blanket and put it over the two of you.
"They're an interesting bunch, well, half bunch...and there might be a talking Raccoon that comes around..."
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Next Part: Homecoming
Tag list: @patzammit @bemysugarbean @buckymydarlingangel @happinessinthebeing @jaqui-has-a-conspiracy-theory @differenttyphoonwerewolf @themotherof10 @lokislady82 @talesofadragon @spikeluv84 @xxxalicerogersxx @avid-fic-reader @royalwriteroftheuniverse @whiskeytangofoxtrot555 @bitchy-bi-trash @crazyunsexycool @openup-yourmind @selella @kattreffic @benedict-squirtle @magnificentsaladllama
Have any thoughts or theories? Head cannons or scenarios you want me to write of nomad Steve and baker reader? Submit them to my inbox! I’ll add them to the more fun stuff masterlist here!
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katyawriteswhump · 3 months
Text
364 days later (Steddie holiday drabble)
Written for @steddieholidaydrabbles, day 30/31 prompt, New Year's Eve/Resolutions I AM SO SAD IT IS NEARLY OVER!!!!
When Steve is hurt on New Year’s Eve, he discovers there’s only one person he can truly go home to.
WC: 918 Rating: T CW: off-screen/pre-fic violence including domestic violence. Tags: hurt/comfort, fluff. Established steddie.
Also part of my steve whump fic series (mainly steddie) on ao3
***
“I hadn’t a clue where else to go,” says Steve, an odd tremor in his voice. 
Steve hadn’t knocked, hadn’t announced his arrival. Eddie simply opened the trailer door and found him. God knows how long he’s been standing at the bottom of the steps, cradling one arm in the other. It’s dark, but it’s screamingly obvious something’s wrong. Steve’s hair is kinda ruffled for starters. 
“I mean, yeah, we have a date later,” Steve rambles, “being New Years Eve and all that crap, and… uh…”
Holy shit! Eddie jumps down to him, freaking out big-time. Blood smears one side of Steve’s face, his lip is bruised, and his harsh breaths cloud the icy air. Eddie wants to hug him tight; instead, he briefly clams up, super-terrified. He’s never seen anybody so robust appear so… brittle.
Gently, he cups the uninjured side of Steve’s face, curves an arm around him. “What the hell happened?”
“I did it, man. Finally. My dad… I, um…”
“Your dad did this?”
“He wishes,” Steve says, snarky.
Eddie seriously can’t fathom whether he’s lying: “Who else, man?”
“Got jumped leaving work, and I… I…” Steve’s wretched laugh crumbles into an even more wretched whimper. Eddie catches him, as his knees buckle.
“Okay, big guy, I gotcha.”
He bundles him inside, sits him on the couch. Steve stares spacily, hugs his arm, rocks himself. 
Momentarily, Eddie literally flaps. Then he grabs a chilled beer from the fridge, douses a clean cloth in water. He coaxes Steve into holding the can against his swollen wrist, while Eddie dabs the blood from his face.
“Gonna sting,” warns Eddie. Steve hisses. “Sorry, Stevie.”
“It’s fine. Christ, I’m okay.”
“Not buying that BS today. Not sorry.”
Eddie frowns, concentrating hard. The cut, fortunately, has clotted already. He binds Steve’s wrist with a make-shift bandage. Steve mutters about getting kicked a LOT, when he was curled on the ground, shielding his face. Eddie feels sick, soothingly shushes Steve’s gasps of pain. Possibly as much to comfort himself as Steve. “Look, we should get you to the Med—"
“No way. I’ll fix… Listen, I finally did it,” repeats Steve, as his eyes flutter closed.
“Yeah? Did what exactly, Babe?”
 “Carried out my New Year’s resolution.”
***
Steve barely recalls how he got here.
He’d driven around aimlessly. His wrist hurt so bad that he goddamn cried, too far gone to give a shit. He couldn’t think; he was drowning, sucked deep into thick, suffocating waters. Some crazy inner compass drew him to the one place he could pull for the surface.
He found himself outside Eddie’s trailer. Standing there stupidly, hurting and shivering. Not even yelling to be let in. Now, he’s inside and getting warm with Eddie, who asks again what happened.
Crap, does Steve even know?
He honestly couldn’t ID his attackers. Sorta knew why he was attacked, being guilty of so much these days—hanging with geeks, being a king that lost his crown, not to mention his boyfriend being Eddie ‘spawn-of-satan’ Munson.
Then his Dad.
The look he’d given Steve, when Steve arrived home bruised and bloodied. 
“He didn’t need to say it,” says Steve, head resting on Eddie’s shoulder. “It was written all over his smug-ass face. You deserve this.”
He’d yelled his butt off about Steve making trouble. Shoved Steve around a bit, knowing he was in no shape to fight back.
“I told him to stick it. Left with basically nothing. Okay, the car, though that technically belongs to him, and… Shit, where am I gonna go?”
His tardy reality check hits like a baseball bat to the gut. Huddled against Eddie, he’s shaking, breaths hitching, hating himself for it. Eddie wraps his other arm across Steve and holds him. 
Simply holds him.
And yeah, he calms a little.
“Seriously, don’t sweat it,” says Eddie. “You can stay here till you’ve figured stuff out. Forever, if you need.”
Steve glances up, swipes angrily across his damp cheekbone. “Uh, earth to Eddie? Wayne?”
“He’ll cuss under his breath. And love the heck out of you. Already does. What’s one more overgrown brat?”
“C’mon, he’ll—"
“Look, I’m genuinely blown away. It’s New Year’s Eve and you’ve already nailed your resolution.”
Steve buries his face again, and… Woah! He’s laughing. Eddie’s kickass painkillers are working, or… Screw it, life never sucks so bad when he’s with Eddie. 
“Leaving home was last year’s resolution,” he mumbles toward Eddie’s armpit.
“Oh.” Eddie plants a soft kiss on Steve’s hair. 
“Yeeeeah. I’m only, like, 364 days late.”
***
Eddie’s still freaking that he should get Steve better help. However, Steve is a dead weight against him, knee curled in Eddie’s lap, and refuses to budge from the circle of Eddie’s arms.
New Year ticks by, lost in a gentle, lingering kiss. Eddie ghosts his thumb, featherlight, down the uninjured side of Steve’s face. Steve scrunches his good hand tightly in Eddie’s hair, deepening the kiss more passionately than—given Steve’s bruises—Eddie dares.
“Happy New Year, Babe,” whispers Eddie, when they break apart. A sneaky smile plays on Steve’s lips. “What?”
“I hit a winning streak,” says Steve, “I’ve smashed this year’s resolution already.”
“Huh?”
“Do I really have to spell it out, dipshit?”
Fixing deep in Steve’s eyes, Eddie’s grin spreads slowly. Dammit, this was going down as the worst and best New Year ever, and sure as heck the most shamefully sappy:
Oh, I get it. Falling in love.
“Back at ya,” he says, and tumbles forward into another kiss.
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collectivecloseness · 1 month
Text
E.M. Little Mermaid AU
Chapter 1
Eddie Munson x reader
Summary: Three days after Eddie Munson dies in the Upside Down, you’re called to make a deal with the not so dead Vecna. One where your boyfriend will be brought back to live a long and healthy life, but after the next three days, you need to receive true loves kiss from him. The only problem is Eddie won’t remember you... and you’ll have no voice. You, and the rest of the party, have three days to make Eddie fall in love with you all over again; especially since you don’t know what power you’ve given Vecna by making a deal with him...
(Notes: Plot loosely based on both movie versions of the little mermaid. Refs to Vecna having a ‘special’ interest in reader, esp in this chapter, but only em/r. Cw: references to character death and trauma)
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3 days. It had been three days since Eddie had died in the upside down. And you’d been able to do nothing about it except hold him as he passed.
You had apologised to Steve for slapping him, right after he threw you over his shoulder and dragged you out of the upside down himself because you were still clinging to Eddie. Just wanting to stay with him, uncaring if that sealed your fate too or not.
Steve had of course forgiven you. He was a good man. You could tell he was upset not being able to save his friend also.
But Eddie was more than your friend. He was your soulmate. Your everything. Your future. What would you do now Eddie’s future had gone? Where was your part in the world now?
Nancy had taken the gun out of your hands the moment Steve landed your feet back on the grass and soil, over where the entrance had sealed closed, a gateway through the woods near Eddie’s home. She followed you when you stumbled behind a tree a few steps away. But all you did was hunch your back over, and vomit up your insides onto the ground.
Robin had caught you before you could fall onto your knees into it. And she’d been holding you as Steve held Dustin. You didn’t know what Robin was saying to you. You caught glimpses of what was happening around you, but you weren’t really paying attention.
Eddie was dead. And he wasn’t coming back.
You tried to save him. You’d thrown yourself over him. Your arm had shielded part of his torso as the demobats ripped his stomach open, but it wasn’t enough.
Joyce stitched up your wrecked arm, but you didn’t feel the pain.
Eleven had tried to talk to you. Tried to tug on her older sibling figures shirt. But your eyes remained misty and dazed.
Right up until the moment you burst into tears.
And you hadn’t stopped crying. Not for two days, all you did was cry and scream and choke. You’d had to tell Wayne what happened. He cried with you. But separately.
It was the third night now. You were in Eddie’s room, Robin and Steve staying over today. Wayne couldn’t handle it tonight, he was staying with a good friend, just to sleep.
The first night no one had slept, you’d cried all night in the room where you told Wayne his nephew- his son was dead.
The second you’d stayed in Eddie’s bed. Face buried in the dirty laundry that still smelled of him all over his pillows and covers, sobbing as you looked over the pile of his trinkets and collections all over his room. His room had once been your entire world, because it was just so Eddie. You couldn’t bare the thought of any of it being gone, Wayne moving any of it, because you couldn’t deal with the fact Eddie was gone.
You kept the necklace Eddie gifted you close to your heart, as you had since the moment he’d clasped it around your neck. Pressing a kiss to your ear as he did so - you could still feel the tickle from his laugh, his lips against your ear, his hands warm and always so loving pressing on your shoulders, after his fingers daintily brushed away any of your hair that may get caught, in case you got hurt, twirling your hair around his rings.
Eddie told you you could fill the locket with anything you wanted. He’d even offered up the thought of chopping off a lock of his shaggy mullet, a thought he’d have once been mortified by. Now you wished you’d taken up the offer, but you still liked what it held instead.
Opening the pendant up, at least you would be able to still see that picture you took of Eddie. Smiling, that smile he only ever gave because of you, one that anyone upon looking would immediately be able to sense the love radiating from him in the photo, from the moment it was taken. His big doe brown eyes, those ones you missed staring back at you so much, looking right at the camera, at you every time you looked at it. It felt like he was looking into your soul, even when he was still... And with this you could hold him to your heart, always.
Right now as you lay motionless, unable to cry much tonight, you looked over at Eddie’s vast collection of guitars. Electric and acoustic. You always thought he was so musically talented, and you told Eddie so.
You weren’t nearly as good. Although there was one song you’d always sing to him. You didn’t have the words, but it was a melody. You couldn’t remember if you’d heard it somewhere before, if it was a lullaby, or a song you’d made up as a child, but- but you’d always hum that tune to Eddie when he was sad. It made him feel comforted. That small chorus of notes. You’d sing that melody to him every time Eddie needed it. Your throat felt dry thinking you may never sing it again.
You’ll never see Eddie again.
You’ll never see Eddie again...
You’ll never see Eddie again...
You didn’t remember closing your eyes, you had been so exhausted not even the last three days, but all the time spent trying to help Eddie before you failed him. But suddenly you were dreaming. Well, you thought you were at first. But then it all felt so real.
“Eddie?.. EDDIE!!!” You run over to where you see Eddie walking towards his trailer. Wayne is standing by the door, well worn cigarette dropped on the floor in shock.
And Eddie, your Eddie, is turning around, looking all over, confused, but unharmed. “Y/n?”
You cheer silently, a gasp leaving your massive grin, as you run over to Eddie. Feeling so soothed the moment he wraps his leather clad arms lovingly around your body, his ringed and clean hands immediately burying themselves in your hair, as Eddie always did... does.
Your face is buried into Eddie’s dark curls. A whimper leaves your lips. Eddie’s conditioner smells just the same, and you can catch his sweat, but no grime, in his scent too, pressing your nose and lips to his neck as your chin rests on his black leather jacket, eyelashes fluttering against his mulleted hair that tickles them. And you’re happy.
Eddie’s back! You have to tell everyone!!
Your hands tighten around Eddie’s waist. And while he pulls you in closer, he still doesn’t hurt you with his grip. Ever tender with you, his love. You press a shaky, teary, kiss to his neck, tasting your own salted tears over the small hairs there, and you sink into Eddie’s embrace, ready to look back once more at your boyfriends gorgeous face.
Only to find he doesn’t have one.
You fall back to the ground with a scream caught in your throat, your hands hitting the stone hard dirt as you look at Eddie, pale, faceless, a blur of nothing, just a shape behind perfectly familiar curls, standing above you aimlessly.
The flash of his face, that face, only lasts a moment. And you’re remembering how it felt having Eddie back. The need to tell everyone he was alive still so pertinent.
That need still, the sound of your thoughts, “Eddie’s back... you can see him again” echoey but not unpleasantly loud. The knowledge of Eddie being in your arms just a small step in the future away, they all stay deep in your gut, as demobats swirl above you. No blood on their mouths like the last time you saw them. The sky just red and blue, as it had been down there three days ago. As the same voice you thought you defeated calls to you, to let you know that he promises what you intially experienced just then was real...
Your whole body jolts on Eddie’s bed, finding yourself still facing the side, only a minute or two having passed on the dragon alarm clock you bought Eddie four months ago.
Steve and Robin were still in the kitchen, you saw the light through the slit in Eddie’s door. Wayne still gone for the night. And with everyone out the room, you knew what you felt, what he told you was real.
Vecna had released you. And you can still hear him.
When his voice tells you to follow the bats, you peek outside Eddie’s worn out curtains, and find two demobats, out of place in this world, and in their nature, sitting idly on Eddie’s front lawn. Just waiting for you.  Even though they’re what killed Eddie, you still follow.
Still wearing regular clothes, one of your favourite shirts of Eddie’s on your torso, your necklace under it, you quickly slip on your shoes by his bed without even looking, and make your way to the open space of his trailer.
Steve and Robin immediately stop talking, both turning to you with that same look they’ve had for two or three days now. Not that you’re looking much place else other than the door.
“Hey!.. Hey y/n.”
“Hey man.”
Steve and Robin both greet you, quietening down as their bodies relax while talking to you. Just wanting you to be safe, and knowing right now you need their support more than ever.
You give them a quick nod, but you know you can’t go out there and follow those demobats without getting Steve and Robin uninterested in your comings and goings.
Your friends were eagle eyed looking out for you at the moment, all of them. And you were thankful that your friends were so loving, but right now, you knew you had to get out there.
And so you turned to your biggest target first, Steve, before your eyes had to look anywhere else, to not see all the emotion swimming in his soft brown ones. “I’m just taking a walk. I need to stretch my legs. Get some fresh air in my brain. I don’t think I’ve been feeding it anything else.”
“We- We’ve got pizza!” Robin offers, bringing over a half eaten pizza box from lunch. As they’d all been trying to find quicker ways to eat, to shower, to sleep, because dealing with their traumas right now was time consuming enough.
“Yeah! Let me make you an energy smoothie or something, get some pizza with Robin, like she said.” Steve enthuses, pressing a hand to Robin’s shoulder and giving her a nod, one she gratefully returns; both turning around to do their tasks for you in sync, before you interrupt them.
“No I’m fine. Seriously guys, I just need, like, ten minutes of walking.” It would probably be longer than ten minutes. But you needed them to let you out the house. And they couldn’t exactly be mad at you for lying to them with what you were going through right now.
“We can go with you! Or just one of us, silently.” Steve says enthusiastically, although that last part directed right at Robin. But you shake your head before he can go on, your eyes flitting to the closed curtain on the trailer door as you try to see if they’re still waiting.
“No, guys, I-“ your hand goes to your chest, breathing stuttered. “I just need some time alone with my thoughts. Please. I promise they’re not the self destructive kind. I just need to think.” You looked to both of them, eyes serious.
Steve looks nervous. His eyes a little wider and his lip more bitten, like he already knows he wants to say no, but he’s not sure how to do it without upsetting you any bit. Until Robin surprises him by pressing her hand to his wrist, and stepping up. “Okay. Ten minutes. Try and stay in the trailer park, and like, yeah, if it gets over ten minutes we’ll come to find you, but that’s okay. Just yell if you need anything, alright?”
You were too grateful to be leaving quicker than you could say a thank you, too quick out the door to see Steve giving Robin a look like he wanted to intervene, before she shook her head. Moving towards the window silently, to peek open the curtains, and Steve immediately understanding her.
Inside the park or not, Steve still needed to reassure himself over your safety, so did Robin. Getting his shoes on and kicking Robin’s towards her silently, both grabbing their makeshift weapons still by the front door of the trailer, just in case, Steve too protective not to right now, they both followed you out the door quick enough to see your back moving through the dark trees of Hawkins.
You had stopped dead in front of the demobats, waiting to see if they’d rip you apart just like they did Eddie.
Especially now they were intruding on his home, right after they’d stolen everything from him.
But instead they’d just... looked at you. The feeling was odd, making your skin crawl. Before the nearly identical demobats looked at each other, then chirped nightmarishly before swooping into the sky, gliding at a slow pace above you, to make sure you followed along.
Settling your heartbeat in your chest, at hearing that cry again, the last time you heard it being as Eddie’s own cry joined the chorus, you tried to steady yourself as you followed them. The vision of Eddie, back in your arms, back home - and his voice still looming in your head - causing you to follow.
You went through the woods, following them the whole walk until they took you to a patch of land closeby you knew well from experience was an opening. The one you’d narrowly escaped from three days prior. Leaving Eddie down there.
Robin and Steve had followed along, silently, even as they saw the demobats. They were just glad they’d brought their weapons. They stayed tight knit with each other, not knowing why you were following, if you were under Vecna’s trance again or something, but sneaking along to make sure you would be alright. They knew how ruined you were after Eddie. But they wouldn’t lose you too.
It was only until they saw where the ground had opened up underneath the swirling demobats, and saw you watching the creatures, before looking in the hole, that they yelled.
“Y/N NO!”
You jumped. And Steve and Robin screamed.
They ran right up to where you were, and without a second of hesitation, gripped onto their weapons and each other’s hand, as they leaped into the opening to the Upside Down behind you.
Following the demobats, you shivered as you walked through the upside down, the hellscape you thought you’d all defeated just a few days ago. Not that you could care too much that it was still here right now, not when you were too caught up in having lost your everything to attempt to do so. Now it seemed like it was all for nothing.
The demobats flew slowly so you could carry on at your pace, gliding above you as they lead you. Such a different temperament to when they were all... descending.
They were going to lead you past that spot. You knew it was coming up. So you had to do all in your power to keep your head down, and have your eyes still following the shadows of the monsters in this dim and hellish world. You couldn’t see Eddie like that. After three days. With all those wounds. You gently stroked your healing arm, nervously. And if you did look and he wasn’t there... You didn’t realise you’d been hyperventilating until you heard your own breath.
The noise finally louder than your own thoughts, upon noticing you quickly fought to regain control, a hand on Eddie’s necklace pressed to your chest as you sped up a little, it giving you some bravery as his picture, his gift, reminded you of why you were being brave, and following the demobats as you focused on breathing. They’d already destroyed his body when he was alive, you didn’t want to think of anyone hurting your boy more even after his suffering was supposed to have ended...
Steve and Robin followed close by, weapons ready, bodies never not touching each other, wanting to stay side by side to not be separate, so their platonic other half wouldn’t be hurt. Keeping them safe. Following you silently, as they scanned the place you were heading.
Truthfully, Steve and Robin don’t know what they would do without each other at this point. They’re the only one who... They almost lost each other, so many times the last couple of weeks. It really seemed like they could never rest, now they were back here again. Arms brushing even as they try to stop their weapons from clanging. They’re going to get each other, and you, out of here, together.
They make that promise to themselves each time they make eye contact with their best friend, while they both follow you covertly.
Your breath became a little stuttery as the demobats swooped closer, more at your shoulder height now, and you were lead to an opening, like a rock formation, maybe even a cave, in the woods. Not like the one Eddie used to take you though. This one was bigger... and you’d never felt frightened being with Eddie.
Not until the end.
Now as you saw who was waiting in the entrance, you’d never felt fear like it. Again, until you remembered how you had with Eddie. How nothing could be worse than that memory. And you felt rage, as you were face to face with the human, and smiling, form of Vecna. Alive, and waiting for you, with patience and intrigue.
“Hello y/n.”
You wanted to scream. That’s all you wanted to do. Your anger, your fear, your guilt from your entire life, the way you’d lost Eddie, how unfair it was for him to still think of himself the way he did when he died, when he was one of the best people out there, the way Eddie had died, a hero, just to help defeat this man. This monster. And here he was standing, smiling at you. Both alone.
You wanted to run over there and punch and claw and kick at him until your lungs were raw and your tears made you blind. But better instincts kicked in, and even with all your rage, you knew what was happening here was not right. Your feet took a step back on the, now vineless, rocks, but a woosh of wind from those monster creatures behind you pushed you forward.
Instead of cruelly thinking to yourself how these mutts would be the death of you just like your love, you kept moving forward. And you stood in front of Vecna, Henry, 001, Peter, whatever, you stood in front of him, and you did not falter.
“Why aren’t you dead?”
A smile blossomed through his teeth, and the demobats stayed quiet, behind you, by the entrance. As Vecna circled a position of stones laid by his feet, you circled too, never wanting to let him get you off guard.
“Well that’s a lovely greeting. And here I was wanting to be your friend.”
Robin held her hand on the back of Steve’s, seeing him bouncing in place ready to burst in and tear you out of there, as they got to the entrance upon hearing voices. Both of them felt nearly as awful as you did, seeing Vecna back, alive, smiling. But they stayed put, waiting to see what was happening, even though it killed the both of them to watch him close to their friend. The trauma locked away as they determined to stay strong in this moment for you. They knew you’d need it.
“I’m not going to be friends with you.” You spat, your teeth grit so hard in your mouth you were starting to taste blood. That or the memory of this place was bringing back old senses falsely alerted.
“Oh no? Well that’s a shame. Not even when I’m here to give you a gift?” Vecna cooed, his head tilting, still never taking his eyes off you.
You stopped walking now. Blinking, you took in his words. They were of course teasing, but the actual meaning didn’t seem so to you. You’d met this more human version of Vecna in visions he’d given you before. When you were all at war with him. This seemed like some sort of form in front of you, not just in your mind, although you knew Steve, Robin and Nancy destroyed his physical body. But here was what was left of him. And you could tell his words had some truth behind them.
“What would you have for me?” You questioned, knowing there was only one thing you’d want. Knowing, you didn’t know enough to be able to tell if he could actually give you that, in any way, at all.
Until his words worked with your thoughts, perfectly.
His eyes shone, and his smile never once faded, as Vecna answered you “The only thing you truly want.”
Your heart thumped, a ticklish feeling in your chest like electricity. Feeling it was hard to move your fingers, or your feet, or even to move at all. Just stood there in the face of Vecna’s proposal.
“Eddie’s dead.” The words hurt to say, but you couldn’t afford to be weak around him.
“Mm, right now yes, Eddie is.” Vecna tilted his head, some spark of delight in the conversation. A twinkle of knowledge. “As dead as all the others you and your friends lost. But Eddie doesn’t have to stay that way.” Vecna could practically feel your emotions rushing hot through your body. And he loved it. “What if that were to change? What would you do, to bring Eddie back?”
You tugged Eddie’s shirt further down your shoulders, trying to wrap yourself in it, hoping he’d protect you from this cold chill you weren’t so sure was just to do with the Upside Down. “You can’t do that.”
“OF COURSE I CAN!” Lightning boomed and struck wildly outside. You gasped shrilly as you span to see it, the red and white flashes like claws striking the sky, the two demobats flying and squawking up above the cave like formation’s high ceiling, in place. Unable to see Robin and Steve ducking down, cradling their weapons and each other at this display.
You’d noticed the lack of vines, only two demobats here, but the lighting, his form being here... Clearly Vecna was back in business. If not slightly stunted by you and your friends escapades. By Eddie’s help. Maybe that’s why he had ‘devolved’ to making deals with you.
Vecna calmed as the storm did, a tonal blue outside, even if still dark, as he smoothed back his wavy blonde hair. Smiling at you once again.
You took a step closer, your eyes squinted and questioning on him, but your mind only swirling with Eddie’s face again. Not the vision Vecna had shown you, but your own thoughts. Eddie right back at home, with you, as he deserves to be.
“What’ve you got to lose?” Vecna asks, his voice a soft fry. “I know why Nancy Wheeler took that gun off you so quickly when you got back. Surely you’d do anything to bring Eddie back, where he rightfully belongs. So young to be torn away.”
You swallow. Hands trembly, but body firm, as you remembered the past three days of torment. Knowing how you would’ve give your life for him, right then and there, but you couldn’t go back and change things. How you might’ve even been able to live with yourself tearing the whole town apart, if only Eddie had survived it. And if Vecna has even a chance of what he says he can, what wouldn’t you give?
“You... Can you really do that?” Hope, for the first time in three days, is layered in your voice. Deep under your show of strength, and concerned distrust. But it’s there enough for Vecna to be able to discern it immediately. He knew it’d be there anyway. You really were so easy for him to get.
“My sweet soul, of course I can. Why would I invite you to my home if I couldn’t do what I’m telling you?” His hand goes to his heart, and yours clench tightly by your sides. “You know you’re special to me. Of course I’ll help you out y/n.”
Steve and Robin move forward, weapons in hand, only to be shocked into silence as the demobats swoop out of nowhere in front of them. No squawking or biting or anything, just blocking them, which to your two friends, was infinitely more scarier once they realised.
Especially once they saw that smirk on Vecna’s face, like he knew. And as he took more comfortable steps towards you.
“Think of it as me turning a new leaf. Helping the miserable, the lonely, and depressed, such as yourself y/n.” He smiled charmingly.
Your jaw flexed to the side as you frowned. Your eyes never leaving Vecna, not that he wanted the opposite, as he stood happily close to you now, explaining finally why he’d summoned you here.
Maybe helping to bring light to why you’d followed so willingly, also.
It’s true you were all those things, but you didn’t think Vecna was turning around so quickly.
Vecna alluded from explaining for a few more seconds, instead pacing in front of you with a coy smile on his face, his finger tapping at his chin. “I know I haven’t been... the loveliest to you y/n. You or your loved ones. They weren’t kidding when they called me, well, a bitch.” He chuckled softly.
You almost could too. You made some kind of sound. Remembering how common a nickname it had been for your party. At least, for a little while. Before.
“But I mean it. This once.” He held his finger up, in front of his nose. “Call it what you like, a change of heart, mending my ways, repenting for my sins, seeing the light, all that shit.” He swivelled sharply, standing still in front of you, hands behind his back, head leaned forward to you.
You stood your ground. Even though his smile reminded you of how... close Vecna had seemed to like to get to you in the couple of visions he gave you. You were surprised when Nancy said he’d acted slightly differently towards her in her vision. Eddie had chimed, more like feared, that maybe you were a ‘favourite’ of his. Which is why he picked you to have those visions a little more than the other four young adults around you.
But now it didn’t matter. Not if he could help bring Eddie back. You were listening to every word intently.
“I can bring Eddie back to you. Fully. The way he was.”
You folded.
Your knees went weak. Having to catch yourself before you could visibly stumble too much in front of him, but also so uncaring to that, now he’d said what he’d said. “Really? You really can? Bring Eddie back properly? Not like a... a zombie, or a possessed ‘puppet’ of yours or-“ your voice was wobbling.
“No just like he was before. Exactly the same Eddie as you know, that is for certain.” Vecna nodded. “Of course, there’s a few caveats to that.”
Your breath flew out your lungs. You didn’t trust Vecna for a second. But the thought of Eddie actually being able to come back... To be brought back to life again...
Steve and Robin dodged through the demobats at hearing this, hearing your voice and knowing what it meant. But they only got a step before the monstrous creatures were back again, this time their wings outstretched in front of the two, and snarling dangerous looks on their faces as they hissed.
“Caveats?” You asked, your eyes tracking Vecna widely as he circled around the pebble grouping on the ground, looking up from them, before motioning you closer with a beckoning finger.
“I can bring him back for three days. The same amount of time he was gone. But don’t worry! Besides anything else, I personally assure you, that if you agree to this, and do everything you need to, that I tell you to do, no matter even if you don’t fulfil the contract in the end, Eddie will stay alive for the rest of his natural life. As if he’d never been so brutally ripped apart alive and murdered in the first place.”
You shivered at his words, and you saw his teeth glimmer in response as his lips stretched further in a smile. But he seemed serious, at least, about that part being true.
“Well, he’ll have a long life granted if he doesn’t, I don’t know, get hit by a car while drunk, or falsely shot for a crime he didn’t do, I’m not making him immortal. Just bringing him back. To you.”
You couldn’t even care about how those last two words were practically crooned at you by Vecna. A man who, you hadn’t really figured out, before he was ‘killed’. You knew Hopper had come back as Sheriff to clear Eddie’s name, although too late, even if it gave some peace to Wayne. But what Vecna was offering...
“However, Eddie won’t have his memories of you.”
This shot your head straight up. Your eyes bulging and your heart stuck in your throat, as you received this information.
Yes, you would do anything to bring Eddie back. And he said just agreeing and doing what he asked right now would mean Eddie would stay alive even past those three days. But the thought of him not knowing who you were... if you weren’t in this situation, with this monster, tears would surely be in your eyes. Vecna wanted to explain his plan it seemed though, so you never got too long to ponder over certain specifics he said.
“By the time the sun sets on the third day he’s back, you need to receive something off of Eddie. Something which will bring his memories back of you, and let you both live out the rest of your lives, as if none of this... nastiness,” Vecna held your hand in both of his, patting, before stroking over the fresh scar across your forearm, “had ever happened...”
You, slowly, pulled your hand away. Still listening, but not wanting to piss off Vecna. His blue eyes shot sharp into yours the moment you even started to pull away however. And even though it did make your heart jump, you held your own hand instead, putting it down by your middle, and carried on trying to get all the information you needed for Eddie. “What do I need to get from him?”
Vecna smiled again. You weren’t sure if it was because he was closer, so you could see him more, but this smile felt different. And as he spoke, his voice was so much more softer, as he practically whispered to you “True loves kiss...”
You shoved his chest, backing up a few steps. Vecna looked offended, brushing off his white shirt, while you felt nothing but loathing rile up in you. “Are you serious? How old do you think I am, six? What-“
“Stop talking and listen y/n.” He snapped coldly again, his lips thin, and face sharp.
You did as he said. Closing your mouth, but continuing to stay those few feet apart. Your distrust and despite for him growing more and more.
“What I’m saying is true. I’m experimenting with some new power. And who better to try it on than, you?” He sighed, and the way he looked you up and down made you sure he’d be stroking your cheek right now if he was still so close.
“You poor, desperate, thing. Willing to do anything for your poor Eddie, even make a deal with me.” He sighed folornly at you.
You’re unsure if you’ve ever seen him actually almost enjoying himself. Even while still seeming annoyed he wasn’t controlling all your outcomes like you’re sure he’d love to. Although with how close you were to killing him, you guess him being so close to oblivion might have shaken things up slightly.
“What would you get out of bringing Eddie back?” You ask, genuinely curious because surely he doesn’t expect you to think he’d do this out of the kindness of his heart. He’d never shown any liking towards Eddie. He and his bats were the reason he was dead. He killed him.
Vecna paced one more step, before turning to you, and a dark look you’d seen in his eyes too many times in your short experience with him, flamed once more. “Chaos. Power.”
You inhaled sharply, holding that breath as Vecna walked closer, his mouth rambling along with his twisted mind. “Putting everything out of place for once. Changing human nature so it’s not so destructively and uselessly linear.” Vecna riled up, talking faster and darker and louder and confident. “The chaos of putting someone living again back on the earth who wasn’t before, who’s body was going to rot in this place, bringing him back to live his life on that ground again, doesn’t that show my power?”
You weren’t sure you were supposed to answer. You just watched him. Eventually, a small curl upwards of his lips caught your attention. “Of course, using ‘true loves kiss’ as an end all seems quite powerful, for someone like me to do also. Although there’s another reason that is part of the seal.” He partly explained, and you retained it to memory to make sure that was answered later.
“But it’s not just what I get out of it, it’s what I need before I... allow you and Eddie to be my show of power, and I give you this gift.” He smiled charmingly.
A sick feeling crawled through your veins.
“Of course. I can’t believe we got this far into talking without discussing payment.” You rolled your eyes, your arms coming to cross over your chest, even if your mind and soul was open to what he was saying right now.
But you know Vecna’s tricks. You know his soul. If he even has one. And you dryly chuckle, nodding slowly. “I got it, my life for his, right?” You shake your head, biting your lip, with still some sort of smile on your face at the twisted irony.
You wouldn’t go down to Vecna. For the sake of Eddie’s memory.
Not unless there was absolute certainty...
Because while you would, you would do anything for Eddie, in a heartbeat you would trade your life for his, you do not trust Vecna to uphold his end of the bargain, especially in a situation where you can’t check if he has or not.
“No no no that’s child’s play.” Vecna says quickly. Easily brushing off the notion, which you thought was a stickler. You are surprised, and it definitely keeps you listening, with the thought of you and Eddie being back together seeming not so much like a dream anymore.
“That’s child’s play,” he repeated, spat, “swapping one life for another. I told you y/n I want to show power.”
‘Eddie, Eddie, Eddie’
It’s all you can think about. It was louder than your own thoughts. But you tried to make sure none of this was a trick, although you were sure it was in some way. You knew what he was like, what he had done to El, what he could do to you, you tried to be smart enough to make sure Eddie would come back alive, or you’d be able to kill Vecna right here right now.
“Okay. So what do you want?”
Vecna takes those steps closer in your personal space now. You stand strong. But when his eyes slowly linger, down to your throat, and his hand twitches large by his sides, you can’t help but gulp. Your anxiety actually making it worse. Your veins fluttering in your neck as your eyes tracked his from staring at it, to slowly trailing back up to your own, and his lips spreading into a smile as he spoke up, loudly and clearly.
“Your voice...”
You lean your front back, your neck and head extended that way too, as your own hand comes to rub tenderly over your neck. Realising now as you tried to speak, just how hard it sometimes could be. “M-My voice?”
He nods, his eyes flipping from your hand on your neck, back up to yours. “Just for three days.” He poses. As if it’s that simple.
You weren’t the only one struck by this revelation though.
“Y/-!” Steve and Robin tried to call out for you simultaneously. Their weapons pushing back against the demobats, even if they were still several feet away by the entrance.
They were quickly shut up though, as the few withering vines that were left snapped to attention, and coiled themselves throughly over Steve and Robin’s mouths. Wrapping around their bodies enough so they couldn’t fight back, as the ends twisted and turned to shut them up.
Both friends facing each other, terrified, and looking back to you, who still hadn’t noticed your friends who would’ve talked you out of something so dangerous, having followed you, to help you. Terrified not just for themselves but because they knew what you were going through. And that you were fragile.
Luckily for them the vines didn’t squeeze. They just held them there. As if they themselves, were focused only on waiting for your response.
You kept rubbing your neck, thinking about how your breath sounded, how you used to chat and sing and laugh with Eddie. Why Vecna would need or want that. All these thoughts flowing through your head, that and still ‘Eddie, Eddie, Eddie!’, but you had to use your voice while you can, and ask him at least one thing importantly.
“But without my voice, how will I get him to remember me? Or- or fall in love with me again?”
“You’ll have your looks!” Vecna says, in a way that sounds oddly unlike him, but also as if he’s mocking you, which does seem slightly more in character.
“That pretty face will do wonders...” He hums, his lips pressing together at the end of his sentence as he looks at you.
You feel that chill in the air again.
“And who needs words, y/n? I’m sure you can attempt multiple methods of yours. Eddie’s kind, isn’t he? That’s what you’ve been trying to teach all the others, in your backwards town, in that ignorant world.” Vecna talks, as if spreading a teaching to you.
You definitely know how he feels about the majority of humanity. Having only interacted with few in his existence, he may be more inclined to inform opinions on those he has met. Including, to varying degrees, you and Eddie.
“I’ve watched you, you’re smart, you’re resourceful, you’re... peppy.” The way Vecna enunciates that last word seems to contain a meaning you can’t be bothered to decontstruct right now.
“It will hardly matter if you and Eddie are truly soulmates, will it?” Vecna asks you, as if he is serious which you know he is not. He seems to twist into showing his discontent for yours and Eddie’s lovey dovey semantics as he moves on, with a smile. “Besides, even without dialogue, I’m sure you can use some body language to entice Eddie back.”
You look at Vecna with disgust. Eddie is not like that. He isn’t, not was you still think with relief, with hope, even as you scowl at the monster who was the reason he was dead. Especially when the way Vecna said it, how he looked you up and down, how this was one of the few times any of you would ever see him smile, it made your skin crawl.
You’d say you knew what men could be like, but you would not call Vecna a man. Not even when he was before. He’s always been a monster. But Eddie is not like that. He wouldn’t see you like that, he didn’t. And your Eddie is not a monster either.
Vecna has that look on his face again. The curious one, where he tilts his head. Even when he seems like he’s trying to be ‘playful’, he just always looks full of anger to you.
“Oh come on y/n. I’ve seen it up there. You don’t need your voice. I mean surely, not for Eddie right?” Vecna twists and twists his words. His eyebrows raising as does the corner of his lips, revealing those shark like teeth, whenever he sees you being pulled in by him.
“Men up there don’t like the girls who gossip and yap and bore, at least, that’s what I heard.” He squints his eyes, smiling as he takes another step forward. You think his eyes are shark like too.
You know he doesn’t know Eddie. It’s very clear especially with his words. Eddie and you used to talk, and talk, and talk. You both loved having someone to just talk to, about anything on your mind, for hours at a time; someone who understood what it was like to want to, someone who listened.
When you took a step back, Vecna changed up his method.
“Eddie though, now he never avoids conversation, he is impressed with how you keep up with him, how you can listen and entertain, how you two fit so well even when talking together unendingly, don’t you love that about him? Do most men live up to Eddie Munson?” Vecna asks you, as if he’s curious for your answer. Not just trying to manipulate you.
You notice he uses the word ‘is’ for Eddie. But you also notice the word ‘live’. Your head feels like it’s burning, everything feels so confusing right now.
Robin and Steve struggle to yell behind you.
“But even Eddie would think you were cute, how could he not, still? He would dote on you just the same as before. Knowing Eddie, he might just trip as he fawns over you being so... quiet.” Vecna purrs, leaning forwards again, so close he can afford that last word to be mewled quietly. And with him breathing down at you, for you to still be able to hear him perfectly.
“If you hold your tongue, it may just save your heart.”
You gulp. Feeling like you’re about to choke on your own tongue.
Vecna lifts one thin finger, and so so gently, brushes it down your pulsing neck, right from the centre of your chin, down gentlemanly to the beginning of your collarbone. Removing his hand afterwards. “Don’t you want to win your prize y/n?”
You hate that your breaths are shaky. Because Vecna can hear them, he can probably feel them on his skin. If he really is here, which you suppose now he is, in some way, since you could feel him too. But you don’t want to gulp either, not this close. So you keep on breathing. Until you have enough air in your lungs to speak again.
“Eddie will remember me.” You say confidently. Certain in your meaning, although your voice not sounding quite as harsh as you’d want it to, although still induitible. Still confident, about Eddie, in front of Vecna.
“Sure.” Vecna squints his eyes as he nods. Backing up again, as he paces around his cave.
For a moment you’re begging to yourself that you didn’t piss him off. Because you need Eddie back. Then you find yourself pissed at not wanting to piss Vecna of all people off. But you swallow your emotions, with a gulp now he’s not looking, because Eddie is more important to you than anything.
You hate thinking this, but you would probably do anything Vecna asks you to do right now, all if it meant bringing Eddie back.
“I need something from you.” Vecna turns, his eyes not on you, but body pacing closer.
A shiver runs down your spine. But you force yourself to stay in place, for him.
“Something from you and Eddie. Parts of you.”
Your body completely freezes now, apart from your heart plummeting to your stomach.
You blink tears out of your eyes, ignoring the tickling of your eyelashes to keep your form strong in front of Vecna, even though now you’re presumably to be faced with your worst fear. Which was definitely not him...
“Where-“ you swallow shakily, your spit feeling vile in your own throat. “Where’s his body?..”
“No no no.” Vecna tuts at you, his finger shaking as he finally looks at you again, with that condescending narcissistic look you’re more used to seeing on his features.
“You’re darling. Not like that. I need something physical from you two, from when Eddie was alive of course. I presume you’ve heard of DNA by now?”
You had. Especially with all the snooping through files at the Creel place, you’d started doing a lot more scientific research then you ever would’ve done at Hawkins High. Especially when planning on how to prove Eddie’s innocence as a back up plan once you’d saved the town. Ultimately it didn’t end up saving him anyway.
You know what it is. The fact Eddie is currently dead you know all too well also. But Vecna can’t be asking the impossible of you this early on.
However when you start to ask, your jaw moving open in confusion, Vecna moves in again, just millimetres from you.
His elbow nearly brushing against your torso as he raises his hand. His eyes trained to your lips. While his hand moved upwards, and gently grabs your chin. His touch cold, but body presence emanating onto yours. Vecna’s thumb slides, caressing up your chin... but stopping before he can touch your lips.
Almost like he doesn’t want to contaminate them.
“There’s still traces of Eddie with you y/n. They will fade soon. Then so will Eddie.”
Your heart beats, trying not to suck in your lips, your body warming in thought you still have Eddie’s touch you on, his live touch. His last kiss still lingering with you, living on, even three days later. Even now he was gone.
The mix of your fluttering emotions tingling throughout your body doesn’t change the fact Vecna is still so close and grasping you, still looking to your lips with wicked desire.
Desire for his plans you’re sure. Although you’re not sure what else your lips may hold of interest to him.
“And that’s why our kiss can also break the seal?” You ask, chin upturned, mouth barely moving with his hold, but your eyes nonplussed at him, except for determination of your goal.
“True loves kiss.” He interrupts seriously. Moving his eyes to you, from your lips finally, although his fingers still graze under your chin. “They’re very different things. I need that to prove my power, love defeating death and all those things you don’t need to know about. So that’s what will break it in our little contract.” Vecna finally let’s go of you.
You rub your jaw with gritted teeth, while Vecna backs up a step, not before you take a breath.
“Why? Just for power?” You ask again. He did seem a lot weaker than before. Especially if he was just... talking to you like this, making a deal like he said. Then again, you thought he was dead. But if anything could bring Eddie back.
Vecna nods, but with a tilt in his head, hands held in front of him. “There is one last thing yes.”
He doesn’t need to take a step forward this time. He only leans in.
“If you don’t succeed, you belong to me.”
Robin and Steve barely have time to glance into each other’s panicked eyes, before their wrists and legs are fighting at the vines. Robin trying to grab a weapon from Steve’s bag even with her arm ensnared, Steve trying to kick a rock at one of the demobats hissing in his face, even though he’s terrified of the thing. Especially after seeing what they’ve done, taking a bite out of him, seeing Eddie’s body.
But no matter their panic they are clawing at the vines, Robin trying to stamp on one of the demobats tails, just to try and get your attention with the noise; Steve trying to bite through the vine coiled over his lips, while enticing a demobat to attack to hopefully bite at his restraints instead.
The set of best friends yelling furiously into the vines only smothering their cries, not aiming to kill them this time, which partly makes matters worse.
Panic pumps through their body like ice cold blood, dread oozing in their stomachs, fear causing both of them to strain towards the other, their eyes desperate as they look at their best friend, because they know what your answer will be if neither of them get free.
It’s not a question of what you say. It’s if they can stop you in time.
They need to get you to see them now, to get you away, to do something. Both fighting hard for you, like they always would, how they try to. If one of them can just save you, after they failed to save Eddie.
Looking directly at Vecna, lingering in the silence of his offer, you take two steps back. Finally able to breathe, where he wouldn’t be able to draw you in even more. Breathing air not surrounded by him, taking steps back so you can come back to your reality, to what you’re actually surrounded by.
You followed demobats, monsters, the creatures that killed Eddie down here. To the Upside Down. After having a vision, like the ones he gives people before he kills them. You’re in some kind of cave surrounded by skies that are too blue with red lightning. And here you have the devil himself offering you a deal, in front of you. Surrounded in this nightmare place, seeing clearly you have been lured into the dark by the monster you’ve been fighting so hard against; with no Eddie in sight.
Even taking in your surroundings, the back of your mind only knows it’s not right because Eddie isn’t here with you.
“I don’t know.” You take another step, then two, back. Looking at Vecna as suspiciously as you were before he pulled you in. Dread seeping in your own stomach, your hands twitching by your sides.
You could imagine he was tricking you right now. That Vecna couldn’t actually do this. And why would he want that if you do fail? Or maybe that is to motivate you to absolutely not do so? Importantly, if you do complete everything he asks, what would he do with his growing power, if all went well?
You’d sacrificed Eddie for this town once... you didn’t think you’d do it again. That part wasn’t a problem in your mind, not after you’d lost Eddie once.
You feel bad for thinking it, because you know Eddie wouldn’t want you to, God, fuck, you know Eddie would be shaking you awake, screaming at you right now to fucking run, to not be a hero, to not let anything happen to you. Maybe he was yelling it right now somewhere, banging at whatever gates were keeping you two apart. You could almost see him in front of you, see his hands on your shoulders, those dark eyes in yours as he screams at you. But that’s an almost, Eddie isn’t here, you can’t see him. But if you knew Vecna would truthfully bring him back - you’d do anything right now right here with him.
Vecna sighs.
You’re not sure if you blink, or keep your eyes closed so dissociated in your mind from the moment you lose time, but you open them with a start when Vecna is suddenly stroking your cheek, his blonde waves tickling your temple as he coos to you.
Drawing you in as your knees weaken towards him...
“Ohhhhh poor confused little y/n. A life so full of tough choices. Everything so much harder now you don’t have your Eddie by your side...”
Tears trickle past your lips, ones you hadn’t even noticed in your eyes. And you hiccup quietly a little as Vecna helps lift you steady, just with that one cool and long palm cupping your cheek.
“But I know what you want.” He whispers softly to you, his voice a rumble.
Your cries are small, in nature and in volume. But with Vecna this close, helping you stand, a lock swats at a warm tear on your cheek, brushing it coincidentally away.
That, for some reason, is what pulls you back.
Tears stopping, even with shiny eyes, you pull back silently. Not stopping walking back this time, noticing the surprised look in his eyes as he watches you retreat. And you don’t stay longer. You lean to turn around, continuing to go - you have to get back. Robin and Steve are waiting. Dustin can’t lose you too down here. All your friends have already dealt with too much trauma. Joyce has been working so hard to save you. Wayne needs someone to mourn with. Your family. Eddie!
“You- you’re tricking me.” You say, voice weaker than you’d want it to be but you’re not controlling your emotions anymore. Your thoughts are finally catching up. As your eyes shine in distrust and guilt up at Vecna.
“Tricking you? No- no I don’t trick. I’m trying to help you right now y/n- I am the only one who’s helping you! Truly doing what you’ve been begging someone for, to listen to what you’ve been screaming for.” Vecna’s head twitches as he tilts it. Confused and irritated over how no one ever seems to believe him. Or understand his ways. He’s helped you, and Eleven, and people always, always-! “I promise.” He speaks. But his voice carries that indignant vex from everyone’s disbelief in it still.
Your gut riles and tightens. “This is wrong.” You say, turning further as you walk, shaking your head of the mourning thoughts of Eddie making you numb to common sense, to that anxiety in your brain that’s been screaming at you to run away this entire time.
Thunder roars above you, and you keep your head down, huddling yourself as you keep walking, your skin crawling at the fact you can feel Vecna’s anger behind you.
“Fine y/n! Forget about the world, and love!” He sneers, the air howling without fresh wind. “Go back ‘home’ to your ‘friends’ without him, and never see Eddie again!”
Those words makes you shoot around.
Vecna smirks. He knows he’s got you.
The two demobats swoop out, clearly they were just ahead of you, in the dark close by, but you turn quickly to follow their direction, not seeing what they were distracting you from as you’re turned around. Facing a much bolder Vecna than you’d seen yet.
“Go on and decide y/n.” He sneers, only turning into a smirk as your legs carry you back towards him. “All it will cost is your voice.”
The way Vecna describes it... Eddie is more important than your voice. You’d give anything for him. Even if you were to be without him, if you made this deal, no matter what happened to you, Eddie would be back.
There is no other possible way your Eddie Munson could be alive again.
Vecna stands close to your side, pulling out some kind of contract on a folded piece of paper for you. You raise your brows, even though your mind is fully on Eddie, a twinge of disbelief is shown on your face. “A contract? Seriously?” You ask, genuinely unsure.
Vecna simply shoves it into your hands. He seems to get some type of glee when you hold it. “I need to get that DNA of yours and Eddie’s again, so it was either using this, or...”
His hand running across your cheek, fingertips stretching past your ear gets you to look up from the words on the paper, into his eyes. Unfortunately, they’re back on your mouth.
You can tell it’s purposeful this time though. Vecna seems to delight in making you wriggle. A toothy smile stretching beneath his pink lips when you shrug out of his hold, placing his hand back to his side.
Easily doing so. Your quickly rising and falling chest is for every other reason. As your eyes bore into the paper in your cold hands, knowing in it was the only possible future for Eddie Munson. Rising falling rising falling rising falling, as Vecna talks and talks and talks, while you read and breathe and beat.
“What happened to Eddie is sad. But it happened. Your boyfriend is dead. If you want a miracle to happen you’ve got to pay the price and let me help you y/n. Take a deep breath. Look at it. Who’s around you here to help?! No one! Eddie would be here! But he can’t! You let him die!!!”
You screw your eyes closed. You can’t listen to that you can’t think you can’t not do this you can’t leave Eddie again you can’t do that to him you have to do this with him you have to you can’t not see Eddie again you can’t abandon Eddie to die you have to save him you have to help him now you have to listen you can’t stop listening you can’t let him die.
Vecna smiles up to his demobats, raised above you both in sharp victory.
You have to listen to him you can’t let Eddie die you have to do this for them.
His hand snatches out and grabs your necklace from your collar, throwing it to the ground. It doesn’t break, but opens, to the image of your Eddie, so clear even on the ground like this, smiling up at you. At you.
“This poor-“
Your eyes stay on Eddie’s face.
“Poor-“
Your eyes move to the paper.
“Soul.” Vecna coos.
You don’t realise Vecna’s calling both of you this same thing.
You quickly sign the contract, scribbling your signature on it fast, your blood pumping as you make the choice to be brave. You will bring Eddie back no matter what. Even if you’re giving him to the world, and not yourself anymore. You’re not thinking about you. You can’t even see the words, only Eddie. You need to save Eddie.
You press a kiss to the end of your signature, the wet ink moulding with the spit of your lips. Quickly pulling back the contract and looking at it all. Noticing your wavy signature, not realising until you’d actually looked at what you were writing, you’d signed it with red ink. Until you saw the splotch where you’d kissed it at the end of your name.
Vecna’s eyes had not left you once.
As you’re staring wide eyed at what you’ve just signed, your mouth opening a little in shock, red dotting your lips, immediately a hand is around your neck. You’re cut off with a choke as Vecna grabs you.
He pulls you in close, his nose bumping into your cheek as you panic to stay on your feet, gasping as you feel your neck expand in his cool hands. Your own going to his wrists, feeling the material of his white shirt, his cool skin, the little hairs on his arms, as you try to dislodge his hand a little. Not fighting back as much as you should, one because he was letting you breathe, but mostly because you were willing to let anything happen for this to work.
Suddenly Vecna grabbing you by your throat isn’t as much of an issue, especially since he’s not actually cut off any oxygen, just held you in his grasp; because now you’re distracted by the room spinning, and that definitely isn’t from lack of air flow.
Looking down at your feet you can see the both of you are spinning, and just like Max did, just like Chrissy did, you’re up in the air. Only this time conscious, and with Vecna.
His eyes leer in close as you both raise some inches, continuing to move, his face serious, as his two demobats screech above you. The sound ignited you with terror, panic and trauma from associating it with the sound, the smell, of Eddie’s ripping flesh; and yours under your bandage. But these bats now, they sound like a song out of order, there’s chaos and melody to their shrieks.
Each time you get closer to the sound of their yowls as they fly in the air though, they just raise some more. The storm of the upside down blocking much of your view as you don’t even feel the movement anymore, although that may just be to do with your heart lurching as you go along with this plan, and your eyes held tight on Vecna now.
You feel weird about what’s happening, managing to grab your necklace off the ground without even looking, before you were raised any higher, the winds in the place you thought wouldn’t have any helping you, as you manage to thread your finger through the clasp, small pebbles scratching your arm. You hold it tight before your lose it, the pendant with Eddie’s picture in grasped protectively in your palm, because you know things are happening now.
Your eyes back on Vecna, not fighting his hold on you anymore, just fiercely gripping your necklace of Eddie, you gasp. Breathing deeply as you commit yourself to everything you’re doing right now, planning all this that definitely is trouble, but for Eddie’s life, for what’s right, for the chances he was never given in life and you were fighting to give him now, even though you know what’s happening is wrong, your determination to keep going outweighs any fear that’s howling. Eddie always liked you being a hero, until his final day.
Vecna pulls back distracting you from your head full of Eddie, as you watch his blue eyes move further. His grip loosening, causing you to squeeze onto his wrist. Even as he fully let’s go, you stay in the air. And your breath finally comes back to you when he orders “Sing.”
Words escape you. The only thing you can think of, the only song that seems appropriate in this situation, melancholic, hopeful, and full of meaning and memories of Eddie, is that tune you always used to sing to him.
So you follow Vecna’s instructions.
You sing the melody of the tune you sang to Eddie so many times. When you’d stroke his dark bouncy curls on the couch, once full of life. When he’d hide his face into your chest because he felt safer crying there. When he couldn’t sleep because he was afraid someone would find him and hurt him. When he was afraid of the world. When he was afraid of not being able to show everyone who he really was, before he died.
“Keep singing!”
Vecna yells over the noise inside the rocky structure, noise you’d barely even noticed with your mind so full.
Your focus on the song that was always for Eddie, being for Eddie is such a different way now, as you put your whole chest into it. Raising your voice, and trying to remember the notes just right, even if they didn’t matter to Vecna, they mattered to you and Eddie.
You squeeze your pendant of Eddie tight, willing yourself to be strong enough to do this properly, to be brave for Eddie, like you always were when you hummed this tune for him, to make sure the world didn’t let him down again. You need him to stay strong, you hold onto your necklace with everything you’ve got.
Suddenly that’s when you see it. In the darkness of the Upside Down, of the dark blues and grey clouds and black shadows of this place, you see a ball of light. And as the light moves from your body towards Vecna’s greedy gaze, you’re hearing your own voice getting further away, but feeling your vocal cords move in time. It gives you this sick feeling.
Like something unnatural is being lost, that you can’t produce anything. A sick feeling in your throat, but nothing coming out. That what you’re doing right now, is effecting over there instead. That light should be in your body, and it’s, you’re, moving towards your worst enemy.
Vecna snatches your necklace from your hand, leaving you horrified. You need it back. The picture of Eddie laying close to your heart always, smiling like he was before, looking right at you, from the gift he gave you. Vecna’s hand burning cold on your skin, the chains cutting into your palm, as he steals that away from you.
But then you see your light with your voice going towards Eddie, instead of him, and suddenly, you feel more okay...
Vecna snaps the pendant shut, and you immediately start to feel dizzy.
A rush of dark smoke and red and blue lightning suddenly make outside the cave like structure so crazy, you’re even looking away from Vecna. But when they swirl around you, the smoke and the demobats flying around both you and Vecna in a close loop, you’re looking back to him with horror. Nothing matters but Eddie, but this power floors you, even if you already understood what you’ve signed yourself up for, and still do. Vecna’s using it all on you, he and Eddie are counting on you.
The demobats horrible screeches don’t outweigh the crash and rumble of the hurricane of smoke and lightning you’re trapped in, with your nemesis encaptured right with you. His smirk not on you anymore, but down at your necklace he flips between his fingers. You can only hear the demobats, seeing only smoke and lighting, and Vecna, when the demobats come swooping closer to you both. And then everything is black.
Steve and Robin are horrified as they watch on. The vines immediately withdrew once the smoke started surrounding yours and Vecna’s feet, and everything was too loud and far for you to hear.
Steve helped Robin up, and they grabbed their weapons and they just watched in awe. Weapons ready and pointed, but no sight of you in the powerful haze of elements.
Nothing had attacked them yet, and that left them strong enough to do this, to fight for you if you wouldn’t. But that meant they had to find you first. And now you were trapped up there with Vecna. Robin and Steve couldn’t even hear each other screaming your name, with the booms of thunder and rumbling of this whole world surrounding everything. Let alone you being able to hear them, and know you’re not all on your own.
Until finally, the smoke clears, and you’re only a few feet off the ground, compared to where Steve and Robin were searching up for you before. Luckily enough time for Steve to dive and scrape his barely healing back to hell as he catches you. Landing you on top of him as you fall, which he accentuates with only a cry.
Robin immediately grabs at you, yelling for Steve, as they both hit your cheeks. Robin standing atop with a weapon in hand, and Steve heaving beneath you as he leans over, with you snagged on his chest. Both increasingly hitting you, and shaking you, thunder still quaking as they quickly try and scream your name.
“Let’s go! Steve let’s go!” Robin yells out, red light filling the sky more than the blue cover, shadowing their faces as she helps fireman lift you off of Steve, just to get you up, before he’s on his feet.
“I’ve got them! Let’s go Robin!” Steve yells to her, both of them squinting their eyes from the flying dust and howling wind, as they lean their faces in close to yell. Their hands on each other, and on you, as they yell close to hurriedly plan their escape.
Steve throws you over his shoulder from where Robin was keeping your unconscious body up, and while he secures you quickly with his arm grappling your thighs, they both search around. Robin duel wielding, as Steve manages to hold you over his shoulder, and still hold his axe in another hand.
They can’t see Vecna. There’s no sign of him around. But they’ve got to get you out.
“The wooded path, we should go now!” Robin grabs Steve’s shoulder, both still squinting to see each other, and their way out, before she goes first, slightly lighter on her feet. While Steve still defends her sides, and your back.
Reminded of the time just three days ago he carried you out of the Upside Down like this. Thrown across his shoulder, but this time not kicking and punching and screaming, this time silent. That was worse for Steve. He didn’t think he could feel much worse, but the dejavu of three days ago, in these circumstances, was a lot for him. And this time, you’d managed to do something incredibly dangerous for Eddie, before your friends could stop you...
Both their faces looking to you occasionally, passed out over Steve’s back, your hair slightly obscuring you from Steve’s view, but Robin managing to assure/scare both herself and Steve as she repeats you’re still just out cold. With Steve at least able to feel your breathing over his shoulder, as his arm keeps tight hold of your legs draped on his chest.
Both of them keeping their weapons out in full battle mode as they rush to the exit you entered through, silencing their check ins with each other as the ‘weather’ down there stops, and the eerie quiet of the Upside Down loudens in a way, the closer they get to the exit back home. In a place like this, it shouldn’t be quiet. The two keeping hushed where they can knowing they can’t alert anything out there to the intruders in their space, especially with you unconscious in Steve’s hold.
What’s strange though, is that while they did miss their opportunity at seeing Vecna, nothing attacked any three of you on your way out either.
It let you pass.
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grimmfitzz · 10 months
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having many many thoughts about your Tommy Goes Missing and I feel like since Tommy canonically sided with Billy in s2 (or was it fanon? it’s been ages since I watched the season) and obvs can’t in this au, would Billy taunt his death to Steve?
Like imagining Billy hearing about a student who supposedly fucked off out of Hawkins and how good King Steve fell out of popularity because he had the audacity to still care about Tommy’s whereabouts, then he starts rubbing extra salt on the wound by telling Steve how not only does “the freak” follow him around, but even his “best friend” left without even sending any goodbyes or whatever. Steve would be p i s s e d but also feeling guilty because even though he knows the truth, he still feels responsible for Tommy’s death in the first place so their rivalry might be a lot more intense and maybe the Byers house fight won’t be their first deadly brawl
Oh this question is soooooooo good. And canon just say, I have loved the questions I’ve gotten about this AU with an absolutely feral amount of glee. PLEASE keep ‘em coming.
This turned into a bit of a ramble but bear with me! Also, I wrote this in a mad scramble to get the words out of my brain so if you see any shitty spelling or crappy grammar, shield your eyes and look the other way.
TW: for mentions of character death and grief
Anyways, onto your ask: yes, Billy would absolutely taunt him BUT! Billy was a metal head and I think it’s far more likely that he’d know Eddie even just in passing and that’s not a good thing by a long shot. I think that could be actually kind of awful for Steve in the long run – like we saw in S4 that Tommy backed off of Eddie pretty quick during that lunch scene once eddie actually turned his attention to him. Like at some point Eddie started standing up to the bullies at school and Billy wouldn’t be any different.
And to the overall premise of the question, Tommy wouldn’t be presumed missing much longer after the event is S1. I see Tommy’s death playing out a lot differently than Barbs in more ways than one and this is just one aspect of it. It’s been a while since I’ve seen S1-S2 canon too but I’m pretty sure they all signed an NDA & the government just left Barbs parents to assume that Barb was still missing.
In this scenario though, I think Hopper would be sympathetic to specifically Tommy’s mom because of the way people talk about her ‘claiming’ Tommy is missing. She knows he’s dead. She’s been calling other police stations, hospitals, even morgues for crying out loud. Hopper is getting calls from three counties over with updates on the nonexistent whereabouts of Tommy Hagan.
Tabitha is not being quiet about knowing Tommy is gone. What’s more, the town was basically calling her nuts just like they did Joyce. Maybe not as severely but pretty damn close. So then Joyce argued on Tabitha’s behalf and we all know Hop can’t say no to Joyce.
Especially not when she looks at him in that way that makes her eye look all big and tells him “No matter how many people tried to tell me he was dead, I knew with my whole heart that Will was alive. Tabitha Hagan knows with her whole heart that her son isn’t. If we can’t tell the truth then fine but at least have the decency to let the woman bury him.”
It tugs at Hoppers heartstrings and Tabitha’s persistence just straight up makes it difficult to ‘sweep it all under the rug’. So, Steve was able to confirm that Tommy is gone & Hopper helps Steve break the news to Tabitha. She opens her door to the pair of them and knows, had once answered a door to a pair of men in uniform – army fatigues still covered in dust – and knew. She knows now, lights flashing behind the pair of them.
Steve didn’t have to say but at the same time he did. He hasn’t said it out loud yet and he doesn’t think he can to anyone else but her. “Mama, Tommy’s dead.”
They’re smarter about the fake details than a stuffed body. Smart enough that Tabitha believes them and cries, ends up holding Steve and wiping his tears too. In the end the whole town believes their story:
Steve was the one to find the body - though there wasn’t much to find. Tommy had gone walking in the woods where he was attacked by an animal. He didn’t make it out. The whole police force, hell the whole town, knew that Steve had formed a Search Party of One so it wasn’t a hard sell.
And wouldn’t you know it? Just like that everyone collectively forgets that they ever questioned whether Tommy was missing. There’s even whispers that it was only Eddie Munson that helped Steve look for his missing friend - anything to explain the sudden acquaintance between The Freak and The Hair.
There was a funeral that half the school showed up for. The whole time, Eddie was right beside him. Steve couldn’t look away from the coffin even though it was probably full of rocks. Even though he knew Tommy wasn’t in there. The cheer squad took up a whole row and they all bawled their eyes out like they weren’t saying ‘Get over it, Steve’ for weeks. He didn’t then and he sure as hell won’t any time soon.
The people around him help though. It’s still a little weird with Nancy but Jonathan’s alright and Barb sort of seems to kind of like him now. Plus there’s a gaggle of kids who seem to think his sole purpose in life is to tote their asses from one house to another. Mostly it’s nice to have Eddie around, the other boy quickly becoming Steve’s closest friend.
But it’s still hard. He still misses his friend – his brother. He’s all but stopped pretending to go home to that big, usually-empty house in Loch Nora and spends most nights on the Hagan’s couch. He just can’t bring himself to leave Mama there alone. Overall, there’s progress but there’s still pain. Every day the hurt is a little less sharp-like-a-knife and a little more ache-like-a-bruise.
But this? This is just silly. Steve stares up at the flyer on the wall and can only feel disdain and quite honestly, a bit baffled. The third period bell rings out above them, allowing the masses to start streaming towards the cafeteria.
“Seriously?” Eddie mutters beside him. “It hasn’t even been a year. Like… what?”
“I bet Carol did it. Put it together I mean.” Steve scoffs and rips the paper off the wall. “‘In loving memory’ my ass. Like they didn’t all jump at the chance to talk shit at one point or another.”
“That too.” Eddie nods then insists. “We’ll skip it.” He says it with a level of finality that settles something in Steve.
The thing about Eddie Munson is that he’s the bossiest, weirdest, most self-assured person Steve’s ever met. Weekend plans, ridiculous dungeons and dorks narratives, his oddly strong opinions on movie theatre snacks, it doesn’t matter. Eddie can’t help but to say things like they’re facts. Frankly, Steve just can’t help it either – the way it feels like relief to just go with the flow. Before he was surrounded by people who looked at him for approval before ever finalizing plans or even just which hallway to take to class. It’s nice: letting himself get pulled along in the wake of Eddie’s current and knowing they’re not going anywhere he wouldn’t want to go anyways.
They wander into the cafeteria, Eddie bouncing beside him and chatting in his ear about his study sessions with Nance. He’d flunked out last year but this year? Pfft. 85 is gonna be their year. They’ve decided damnit.
And they almost, almost make it to their table without issue. He should have predicted the foot that juts out in between the tables. Instead, his foot connects and Steve goes tumbling down. He lands alright, not too banged up, but his chest is smashed right into his lunch tray. He can feel the sloppy Joe seeping through his shirt.
Eddie kneels beside him to help him up. Steve tried to shrug him off but he’s distracted. He feels when the flyer gets tugged from his pocket. Billy clears his throat loudly. “In loving memory of our fallen friend, we’ll be holding a pep rally and sharing- oh! Are you going to this Harrington? I heard you were close with Hagan. Should I bring my hanky in case you need a good long cry?” Above him he can hear Billy Hargrove snicker until he yelps and Eddie isn’t beside him anymore and ‘oh gaddamnit.’
Steve jumps up to his feet, shirt stains he damned. He immediately goes to grab Eddie, hold him back maybe, but the metalhead already has Hargrove’s face pinned against the table and a hand tight in the permed curls of that ridiculous fucking mullet.
“What the fuck is your problem dude?” Billy spits between clenched teeth.
“You fucked with my friend, duuuude. Don’t do that again.” The table creaks a bit where Eddie starts leaning all his weight into Billy’s back, his elbow dug deep into his shoulder blade. Eddie lowers his voice to a whisper but Steve can hear him where he’d gone to pull him away. “Ya know, Billy darling, unless you want me to start shouting from the rooftops all the things I’ve seen in my travels from dive bar to dive bar in this shitty little corner of Indiana, I would start keeping your hands and feet to yourself. There’s only so many metal bars around here and I’ve seen you in quite a few. Would you like them all to hear where you got that hanky hm?” Eddie leans in one more time, hard enough to make Billy grunt from the strain, before shoving himself away.
The rest of the basketball team eyes Eddie warily. It’s easy to forget now that they’re friends but there was point between middle school and high school when Eddie Munson got mean. Especially in response to shitty little games like Hunt-The-Freak.
Eddie bows at them all dramatically but most of all towards Hargrove. Then he’s tugging Steve right back out of the cafeteria. “I’m afraid we must take our leave now. Don’t forget this parting lesson.” Eddie waggle his finger at Billy who now sits red faced and fuming in his seat. Soon Eddie is spinning on his heels and waving at the small group of guys Steve’s spent his lunch hours with all year: nerdy sorts but good guys none the less. He really can’t stand the team now that Tommy isn’t here to stand as a buffer of familiarity.
“Come on, Stevie, we’re skipping third period. It’s just gym anyways and I’m feeling like some dinner food, yeah?” Eddie says it like a fact. Of course, he does. Steve just lets him tug him along and ignores the blooming warmth in his chest when those ringed fingers wrap around his wrist. Pretends it’s just the sloppy Joe mess on his shirt.
“If Nancy were here she’d tell you you shouldn’t antagonize him. Fighting will get you more detentions than she can tutor you out of. Besides, you’re gonna get your ass kicked.” Steve snickers, catching up to Eddie as his brain and feet finally kick into gear.
“Please. Those baller assholes haven’t given me shit since I started wearing leather to school. You should know Steve, Mister Number Twelve.” Eddie leans in close, widening his eyes like Steve’s involvement in organized sports is the bane of his existence. The way he carries on on game days you’d think it was.
“Okay fine. You’re gonna get my ass kicked.” Steve huffs, fighting a smile at Eddie’s proximity.
His words have Eddie coming to a dead stop though. “They’re not giving you a hard time are they?” Steve feels his insides go all warm and soft at the blatant concern written across the other boy’s face. “Cuz I’ll cut every one of them off. I’d like to see them all high and mighty when they can’t get high anymore.”
Steve heaves a long-suffering sigh that he doesn’t mean in the slightest. “Stand down, Ed’s. It’s fine. Just trash talk but that’s how the game goes. I don’t need you to defend my honor ya know? I don’t need you to defend me at all as a matter of fact. I can fight just fine and I’m not afraid of Billy Hargrove either.”
“Well good. You shouldn’t be. I wouldn’t let him get close enough to kick anybody’s ass. He’s a big puss anyways. I’ve seen enough of him around d the metal scene he won’t do anything. Stick with me kid, you’ll be fine.” Eddie affects a sharp, transatlantic accent, yanking Steve in closer by the neck only to grimace at the stain on his shirt. “Detour to my locker. I’ve got a shirt you can borrow.”
And in the end, it was true. People, particularly Billy, stayed away from Steve for the most part. So long as Eddie was around people gave them both a wide berth. It’s just Steve’s luck really that the one night when shit hits the fan again is the one night they aren’t glued to each-others hips.
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sweetsartcorner · 11 months
Text
Cozy Stucky Fanfic  “Home”
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Canon-Divergence where the IW battle ended with Thanos dead and all the main cast alive and well. Bucky and Steve decide they've seen enough war and death for two lifetimes, so they retire :) just a collection of scenes watching them settle into their new lives
Read it on AO3:  https://archiveofourown.org/works/46821577
Or read it here:
People always assumed it would end in celebration. For years, that monster had cast his shadow across their world and others and now he finally lay dead. But once he fell, there was only silence. Quietly, they helped the wounded to the makeshift hospital stations as brave civilians went out to recover their dead, climbing over piles of grotesque alien corpses. There was no music or laughter, no dancing in the streets or prideful gloating over their victory. Only quiet grief and the knowledge of how close they'd gotten to losing it all. A reminder that even the most powerful beings in their universe were not immortal or undefeatable. 
Steve hadn't been around the last time a great war ended but he wondered if it had been like this, then, too. Either way, he knew that this one had been his last. So when Tony handed him back his shield in great gesture, Steve passed it on to the only person he knew who understood what it, and the title that came with it, meant. Sam refused and protested and made a big scene but when he begrudgingly took it, "to care for until you come to your senses!",Steve knew he had made the right choice. They both did. 
Bucky waited in the little makeshift tent, resisting the urge to rip off his bandages and scratch at the wounds that already started their healing process. It was deepest night and still he could hear people shuffle around outside. The shouting as some medical emergency made healers and nurses rush between the tents, screams of agony where wounds were too severe to heal and cries of joy when a person thought dead was carried to the shelter, wounded but alive. It was a familiar sound to him, memories of a life long ago. The thought assured him that he had made the right choice. This was not a life he wanted to live any longer. It certainly wasn't how he wanted it to end either. 
A shadow fell on the tent wall, slowly solidifying in the outline of a man as he got closer. Bucky knew who it was long before he clumsily pushed his comically large body through the small entrance. 
"You gave back the arm." Steve said awkwardly, sitting down on the blanket that covered the dusty floor. Sleeping arrangements not unlike what they'd had during their time with the Howling Commando. 
"You gave away the Shield." Bucky shrugged.  They sat in silence for a few heartbeats. "I couldn't stop thinking of it as a weapon." He said quietly. "It was better than what… Hydra gave me. Lighter. More advanced. Prettier too, honestly. But I was given that arm to fight. And I think I'm pretty tired of fighting." Shuri had offered to make him a new prosthetic, one that was less combat-y and could be removed and reattached easily when needed. He hadn’t decided yet if he wanted to take her up on that offer. 
"Yeah, me too, Buck." Steve sighed and closed his eyes. Though the serum made his body age slower than normal, his age showed in that moment, in the lines on his face, the way he carried himself. "I'm done." 
"What comes now?" 
"I don't know." 
They fell into silence again. Bucky watched his friend, watched his chest rise and fall slowly, the dirty blond hair slowly falling into this face, the knitted eyebrows loosening slightly with each breath. He knew what he wanted to come next. What he had wanted since they'd been foolish young boys in Brooklyn, barely making ends meet. But he'd only fully allowed himself to accept that want during his time in Wakanda, trying to come to terms not just with his past as the Winter Soldier but even before that. 
"Stevie…"  Suddenly, his heart was racing. Beating so hard he felt like his chest was going to burst. Steve opened his eyes and looked at him like a puppy waiting for instructions. Bucky took a deep shaky breath and reached his hand out for Steve's. Steve took it without hesitation. "I… don't want to be without you again. I need you." 
Steve's face did a very Steve thing, mixing confusion with earnest care and worry. "Of course, Buck, we'll find a way, we'll stay together if you want!" He leaned closer, gripping Bucky's hand almost a little too tight. At least that meant he didn't notice it shaking. 
Bucky fought the anxiety tightening around his chest and closing up his throat. This was his chance. If he didn't take it now he'd hate himself for it forever. With all that death and violence and grief behind them, he couldn't let this be the point where he chickened out. Trying to focus on the warmth of Steve's hand on his, choosing to trust his best friend, finally allowing himself to feel what he'd tried not to for decades, Bucky let the words stumble from his mouth. 
"I really wanna kiss you, Steve." 
A few agonizing seconds passed in silence. Steve just looked at him in surprise that slowly turned into understanding. He looked away from Bucky, down at their hands as he processed. 
"Can I hug you?" He asked quietly, looking back up at Bucky. 
Bucky felt his heart drop into his stomach. Fear that he had made the wrong choice after all gripped him with ice cold hands. But he nodded and let go of Steve's hand, letting himself be pulled forward and melting into the giant arms that wrapped around him. His hand curled into the undershirt Steve was still wearing, now shaking freely. But the embrace didn't feel like pity or an apology. Gentle hands ran over his back, a comforting and familiar motion. The way Bucky had held Steve when he was skinny and sick and scared. He held him until the shaking stopped and his breathing calmed. 
"You never have to be afraid of telling me how you feel, Buck." Steve's voice was quiet and deep and it vibrated through Buck's body. 
Before he could respond, Steve pulled back slightly, bringing one hand up to cup Bucky's face. When their lips met, softly and carefully, it felt like coming home. And when they kissed again and again, growing in confidence, each touch a little more certain than the one before, they didn't need any words to know what would come next for them both. 
***
Bucky woke, tightly wrapped in Steve's arms. He let the memories of the night wash over him, every careful touch and quiet moan, wanting to stay in that moment for as long as possible. It was hard to believe that had actually happened. How many nights had he stared at the ceiling of his run down apartment, of an army-issued tent, into the night sky, dreaming of Steve's lips on his but knowing there was no way that could ever come true. He hadn't even dared to dream when he had started to regain a sense of self after escaping Hydra. But he knew the world had changed. Not everywhere and not yet all the way but enough to give him hope. And now Steve wanted him, too. A warm shiver ran down Bucky's spine as he remembered how softly Steve had touched him, like he was the most precious fragile thing he'd ever held. Warm soft kisses trailing down his neck, fingertips gently drawing lines on his skin, tracing scars like they were paint strokes on a canvas. He'd forgotten what it felt like to have his body treated with such care and respect. To be looked at as someone beautiful, not a threat, not a weapon. To feel so undoubtedly safe. To let go and to be caught. 
As if on cue, Steve stirred and softly pressed his lips against Bucky's temple. " 'was almost 'fraid it'd only been a dream." He mumbled, burying his face in Bucky's neck. It made his stomach flutter. 
"You must be used to much nicer dreams than I am, pal." 
"Not, not really." Steve planted another kiss on Bucky's collar bone. "So… ' that mean we're like… a thing now?" 
Bucky felt his heart skip a beat. Slowly, he reached out his hand to interlace their fingers, trying to stall having to answer. Part of him was afraid that he was putting their friendship on the line. They'd only just started to rebuild the easy-going but trusting dynamic they'd had before war and death tore them apart. Neither of them were the men they used to be and neither had truly found his place in a world and time that wasn't theirs. But then again, did all this change not warrant a chance for something new? Being like this, affectionate and gentle and honest felt right. Like it was the logical conclusion, the only way their story could've gone. 
"Promise me", he whispered, holding Steve's hand tightly, "that, whatever happens, we'll always be best friends?" 
"Of course, Buck. Always." Steve's breath was warm against his skin. 
"Then I guess we could be a thing now." Bucky smiled. 
Steve's arms wrapped around him tightly and squeezed in agreement. His heart beat so strong Bucky could feel it's thrumming against his spine. A wave of affection came over him. He hadn't even considered that Steve might be just as afraid as he was. 
"You know, I fell in love with you when we were little more than stupid kids." Bucky had no idea what made him want to share that but it felt good to say it, after all this time. He put his hand on Steve's arm as he felt the grip relax. "God, I hated myself for it, and I tried so hard not to, but there you were. Desperately trying to get yourself killed in a war when you were barely alive as it was. A whole lotta stupid in a little guy. But also a whole lotta kindness. Hell, Steve, it was almost like every time I patched up your busted face or held a damp cloth to your fever-ridden head, it only made me love you harder." He shrugged and turned in Steve's embrace to look at him. "I dunno. Just wanted you to know." 
"You could've told me. Back then. I wouldn't have minded." 
"I know. That's why I didn't. You think I wanted those big ol' puppy eyes looking up at me as you said 'I'm sorry Buck, I love you, I do, but not like that.' ?" Bucky shook his head. "You would've only felt guilty for not feeling same." 
"Maybe I would've." Steve pulled his arm out from under Bucky to prop himself up, the other arm still lying loosely across his stomach. "I guess it was miracle enough to me that someone like you would even be friends with someone like me." 
"Yeah, cuz you're an idiot. And you didn't see you were always twice the man I was." 
"That isn't true!" 
"Is too. Nah, you were always nothing but unapologetically you. Meanwhile I was so determined not to be clocked as a fairy that I chased after every skirt in New York." 
Steve raised an eyebrow. "All those girls… no women at all then? It was just for show?" 
"Maybe part of me was hoping one of them wouldn't be. But yeah. Some of them didn't like guys either, we covered for each other." 
Bucky had liked them all, for sure. They'd been nice girls. He had treated them with all the gentleman manners his Mama had taught him. He was sure he had given a fair share of them a pleasant night, too, but it had all felt empty. Even the stolen, messy moments with random men in bathroom stalls and alleyways had felt more real to him and that was a mighty low bar to set. All of it had paled to what he had felt stroking Steve's hair as the little guy fell asleep in his lap or holding his hand in a scary ride at Coney Island. 
"You're a good man, Buck." Steve tore him from his memories. "You always have been." 
" 'spose there has to be something good about me to deserve this." He lazily gestured at their undressed tangled bodies. "When did it change for you, though?" He added, taking Steve's hand again. "I saw the way you looked at Carter. When did you start looking at me like that?" 
"I dunno. I've always cared for you. Then I lost you and it broke me. I found you, and you were broken. And maybe in trying to figure out where to go from there…" 
"You saw me as truly your equal." Bucky said gently. "Not the big guy who threw punches for you and stole your dates, not a soldier to outrank and prove yourself to. Just… two broken men, out of their time." 
"Hmhm maybe." Steve murmured lazily. "It is kinda hard to find someone with shared life experience." 
***
The months after the final battle went by quickly. A lot of talking, a lot of politics, a lot of clean up, a lot of grief. Talks were started once again about the Avengers' role as protectors of earth. News spread of Steve Rogers stepping down as Captain America and passing on the Shield to the Falkon. Under the promise of retirement, Steven Grant Rogers, formerly Captain America, and Sgt. James Buchanan Barnes, formerly known also as the Winter Soldier, managed to settle a deal, allowing them to return to Brooklyn, absolutely one hundred percent retired, and sworn to social work at the newly opened veteran center. New superpowered villains surfaced and new superpowered heroes rose to meet them. The world kept on moving. 
"I'm convinced you picked the tiniest apartment in all of Brooklyn." Natascha spun around in the living room kitchen space, stretching out her arms to make a point. She didn't quite reach each wall with her hands. Not quite. 
"It has three rooms!" Steve protested. 
"Three tiny rooms. You have all that money, what else are you going to use it for?" 
"I don't know. Fancy art supplies? A puppy?" 
"I think it's perfect." Bucky smiled. "And we're not getting a puppy. Maybe a cat though." 
Steve felt warmth spread through his chest as he watched his partner move through the apartment they'd pick out. It was perfect. Because it looked almost like the place they had lived in before the war. It was bigger, in fact, than their old place and more modern though whoever had renovated it had kept some of its original charme in the kitchen tiles, the lacy white curtain and doors. He ran his hand over the ancient wood and wondered, for a moment, who had lived here back then. They weren't too far away from their old block, he might've known them. How much love and heartbreak and sickness and joy had these doors seen? 
"He's getting nostalgic again." Bucky said behind him and Natascha chuckled. 
"It's a nice door!" Steve gave it another pat, then turned back to the others. "Anyway, we should get our boxes up or we'll have to pay the moving company extra." 
"I'm with Nat on this one, I’m not even sure how you wanna fit all that stuff in here." Sam entered with the last box and dropped it demonstratively in the center of the room.
"Steve's gonna expertly stack it. Like real life Tetris. " Bucky said.
"How do you know about Tetris?" 
"Sam, I am best friends with a teenage tech genius. I even know about tiktok." 
"It's true, he spent the whole way here watching very short videos." Steve nodded.
Natasha shook her head. “This is about to be the world’s weirdest retirement home.” 
They spent the afternoon in easy banter, carrying boxes and having Steve expertly stack and fit their belongings into their new home. They didn't have much to begin with so it wasn't as much of a challenge as their friends had feared. In-between rearranging furniture and fixing up the ancient doors and windows, Peter dropped by - quite literally - with snacks and refreshments. For the first time in a long time, especially for Natasha, Steve realized, they all just got to be people. Friends, helping friends move into a new place, laughing and bantering and taking bets on how many pigeons would swoop down and steal a bit of pizza topping as they sat on the fire escape. And as the sun set and they said their goodbyes, he hoped that this time around, that feeling could last. 
Bucky sat with his eyes closed, back against the wall, letting the last rays of the setting sun fall on his face. It was the most peaceful Steve had seen him in decades. Quickly, he grabbed the sketchbook and the coloured pencil they'd just neatly sorted into the living room shelf. Drawing Bucky was familiar, most of his features coming in from muscle memory, only a few lines of age showing under his stubble and on his forehead, skin more weathered than it had been before, and his hair now long and pulled back into a low bun. He captured the warm sunlight and the sharp shadows it cast on his partner's face. 
When the scratching of his pencils stopped, Bucky opened his eyes and strained his neck to see. "Not bad. You could be one of those influencers on the Internet." 
"Dork." Steve tapped the sketchbook on Bucky's head. 
"Naw, you love me." 
"I do." 
***
The sound of keys jiggling in the lock startled Bucky, which in turn startled the tiny shadow under the bookshelf, causing it to retreat further into the dusty darkness. The door opened and closed and the floor vibrated with heavy footsteps. The tiny sharrow hissed. 
"Uh, Buck?" 
"Yeah?" 
"Why are you on the floor?" 
"Sshh keep your voice down! You're scaring it." Bucky said, eyes fixed under the shelf. 
To his surprise, Steve decided to listen to him just once in his life and quietly kneeled next to him. 
"It's a cat, I think. Must've come in while I was taking the trash out." 
"Told you not to leave the door open. Remember when we had rats in our pantry? Took us weeks to get them out." 
"Steve. That was in the 30s." 
"Still."
They sat in silence for a moment, staring at the dust dancing around the shelf. 
"You know you're not gonna catch a cat like that though, right?" 
"Why not?" 
"Would you trustingly walk up to someone who backed you into a corner, then loomed over your only way out?" 
Bucky pushed himself up to his knees. "I guess not. Then what do we do? It could be hurt." 
"We give it space to come out when it feels safe." 
So they decided to set up camp. Bucky placed pillows and blankets a decent distance away from the bookshelf while Steve put out a flat dish with leftovers from last night's dinner. And then, they waited. 
"Kinda feels like when we were kids, building pillow forts." Bucky reminisced. 
"I can almost hear your mum telling us off for not letting Becca in." Steve chuckled. 
Becca. The name left a twinge in Bucky's chest. For a moment, he could hear her voice, the worry and anger in it as she sent him off to war, begging him not to go, pleading that he'd come back safe and sound. 
"She's still alive, did you know?" He said quietly.
He'd looked at what had become of the Howlies soon after recovering in Wakanda. Had traced their lives and their children's lives. It had been comforting to see the legacy they had left, to see that part of his past lived on in this way. It was a reminder that all their sacrifice had not been in vain. But he had been afraid to look into what happened to his own family, the people he left alive, who buried an empty coffin. Probably two. Steve had been as much their son as he had. 
But a few nights back he'd been laying awake, staring into the darkness, wondering. He'd crawled out of bed and called Nat. He wasn't surprised that she knew without hesitation that Rebecca was alive, lived in a nursery home, had two children and three grandkids, and hosted illegal gambling card games every friday night. "You didn't think I would simply not keep tabs on your living family, did you Barnes? I'm not an amateur." She was not. She was a damn good friend though. 
"I know." Steve answered softly. "I looked into her when I got out of the ice. Had Nat check in on her every now and then. Though I think maybe she did more than just that." He chuckled.
"Why'd you never visit her like you did Peggy?" 
"I couldn't face her, Buck. I let her big brother die. You were on that train because of me. I watched you fall and I didn't come back for you." Steve's face twisted with grief. "And then I came back from the dead and you were still gone." 
Bucky curled up against Steve's chest and put his arm around him. "I understand. It wasn't your fault. And never, not for one moment, did I blame you for what happened to me. But I understand." 
"Will you? Talk to her, I mean." 
"I don't know. She seems happy. It feels wrong to disturb that with bad memories. I'm not sure her life has any room for me anymore." 
"You're her big brother, Buck. You'll always have a place in her life." 
"I miss her, Stevie." Bucky mumbled into his shirt. "Just how I miss Ma and the Howlies and the way our life was before that stupid war." 
"I know. I do too." Steve's voice was hardly more than a whisper. "But we can't get that back. It's all gone forever. Becca isn't. If you don't take that chance, you might never forgive yourself." 
Silence fell over the apartment and for a long time, the only sound to hear was steady breathing as both men drifted off to sleep. As the sun set outside, the soft rhythmic patter of tiny paws, then a steady rumbling purr as a small dirty creature settled in the space between them. 
***
"This falls under torture. I'm sure this breaks the Geneva Conventions. We should call someone about this." 
"If you get up now, she'll remember it and we will never have this bed to ourselves again."
"But Steve. She sounds so sad. What if she thinks we don't love her anymore?" 
"She's a cat, Buck. They assume everybody loves them." 
"Stevie…" 
"Bucky… You're gonna have to be strong." 
"..." 
"... Buck." 
"No!" 
With all the super assassin speed and agility he could muster, Bucky escaped Steve's grasp, bounced from bed to door and opened it before his partner could intervene. Alpine bounced into the room and into Steve's lap. 
***
Steve tried not to wince as Bucky’s grip tightened painfully strong around his hand. The panic was clear on his face, eyes darting around the hallway, checking for possible escape routes, calculating the most efficient route, the best places to take cover, noting anything that could be used as improvised weapons. It was a habit that was hard to shake, Steve knew it too well. But this wasn’t the kind of situation you ran away from or the kind of panic that would cool down in the simplicity of combat. 
The nurse leading them through the winding hallways stopped and knocked at an apartment door, then pushed them both inside and closed it behind them. The men stared in awkward silence at the elderly woman in the room. Her long white hair was flowing elegantly down her shoulders and she was dressed in a flowy gown, clearly caring for the way she looked despite her age. Her eyes were still the same. Bright and clever, the same shade as Bucky’s. 
“Took you long enough.” Becca said, her voice shaking with emotion. “I made coffee.”
Suddenly, the crushing pressure on Steve’s hand was gone and Bucky with it, arm wrapped tightly around his sister as they both dropped to their knees. Steve was about to turn around to give them space when Becca shot a warning look at him and waved him over. They stayed in their tight embrace on the ground for a while. It reminded Steve of when Becca was little and scared of the thunderstorm, so Bucky and him would hold her between them until it passed. Only after they’d all run out of tears to cry and their shaking stopped did they pick themselves up from the floor and moved to the small living area. The coffee had gone cold but they pretended it hadn’t. 
“I was always wondering, you know.” Becca said quietly, dabbing her eyes with an embroidered handkerchief. “You were on the news, both of you. And then you weren’t. And I never knew if you were alive or dead or why I never heard from you.” 
Bucky stayed quiet, looking at his sister with a mixture of grief and joy that made Steve’s heart ache. He answered for him instead. 
“Yeah, I know, Beccs. And I’m really sorry. Just… didn’t know how to tell you I let your brother down.” 
Becca shook her head and smiled sadly. “That stupid soldier serum didn’t make you any smarter, did it? Like I didn’t know you would’ve done everything in your power to save him. Like I didn’t know, when that letter came, that a piece of you fell down that gorge, too.” Fresh tears glistened in her eyes. “I lost two brothers in that war, Stevie. I would’ve been glad to have at least one of them back.” Before Steve could respond, she shook her head again and cleared her throat. “But now I do. And I am grateful. And that is what matters.” 
“ ‘m sorry, Becca.” Bucky whispered. “I wasn’t myself for a while. Had to sort that out first.”
“I know, Buck. It’s okay.” 
They sipped their cold coffee in silence.
“Your husband. Was he good to you?” Bucky asked.
“Yeah. Matthew was wonderful. The love of my life. A good father. You would’ve liked him, Steve, he was an artist, too.” 
“I’m sorry I didn’t get to meet him.”
“Oh I have enough stories to tell you will feel like you did!” Becca’s smile still lit up the room like it did when she was small and wore her hair in pig tails and asked him to teach her how to draw a cat.
“I can’t wait to hear them!” 
“Sounds like you had a good life.” Bucky said, his eyes wandering over the framed pictures and the string of polaroids on the walls. Many different faces over many years. Some clearly family, some maybe friends or co-workers. The most recent ones looked like they were taken at the card game nights Nat had told them about. 
“I did.” Becca reached out to pat his arm. “I hope now you can, too.”
“That’s the plan. And, about that…” Bucky’s brows knitted together and he tensed a little. Steve did, too, as he realized what Bucky was going to say. “Steve and I … we’re kinda … together now? I guess I have always sorta … liked guys.”
“Oh Buck.” Becca chuckled. “If Ma were still alive, I’d owe her ten bucks.”
“Wait, what?” 
“I am happy for you both, though. If ever there were two people meant for each other it’s the two of you.”
“You could at least act a little surprised.” 
“Why? Because you’re a homosexual? My daughter is, too, she has a lovely wife! And my son’s oldest kid, they’re nonbinary. You can be that now, you know, be neither man or woman. Sometimes both, I think.” 
“I can’t believe you and Ma had a bet going.” 
“Well, none of the girls you were with stuck around longer than a few weeks, so either you were a terrible man who viewed women as nothing but a source of pleasure or these girls were all smart enough to see you had no interest in seeking pleasure with them at all. And I know Mama raised you to respect a lady. So.” 
It was as though a weight had been lifted off the whole room. Bucky was beaming, shaking his head in disbelief. Becca was fumbling for her phone so she could show photos of her, apparently very queer, family. Steve put an arm around his partner and allowed himself to breathe.
The nurse eventually had to kick them out as it was long past the permitted visiting hours. They promised to come back for the next card game night, and yes, next wednesday for coffee - warm this time - and they promised they’d meet the family and they’d be present for every passover, hanukkah and bar mitzvah from now on. 
***
Alpine purred loudly, shedding her white hair all over Nat’s pleather tights as she nestled into the former spy’s lap. Sam shot her a jealous glance. For all his insistence that he was a dog person, he seemed to be taking the white kitten’s preference rather personally. 
“It’s cuz we’re both ruthless killers.” Nat grinned, stroking the small feline, which caused even more hair to rise in a cloud around her. “She respects the craft.”
“I’m sure you are about the same level of dangerous and I do mean that as a compliment.” Steve laughed. 
Bucky sat cross-legged on the floor and watched his cat poke tiny holes into his friend’s pants. He still didn’t like talking much when there were too many people in the room but he liked watching. The tiny apartment was very full. Becca had been allowed to leave the nursing home for the day and she had brought her friend Martha. Martha had come from Germany during the war and she didn’t speak English very well but Becca always seemed to understand what she was saying. Steve had been buzzing around them for an hour, making sure they sat comfortably and had water and weren’t going to spontaneously drop dead from old age. At some point he had gotten into an argument with Martha when he wouldn’t let her help with dinner. She had yelled at him in German until he fled the kitchen, much to the amusement of Sam, who had told him this would happen. “I am older than her!” Steve had complained but not really meant it. 
“You know, maybe I was wrong about this place.” Natasha said, smiling down at Bucky. “It feels like a home.”
Bucky nodded. He stretched out his hand to pet Alpine, shedding more hair. 
“I’ll never be able to wear these pants in public again, am I?”
He shook his head. 
“Ah well.”
And as Becca and Martha shuffled out of the kitchen, both chatting simultaneously in different languages, and a room full of highly trained superheroes jumped around trying to help them serve dinner, Bucky pulled his kitten into his lap and finally let himself believe that the time for fighting and violence was over at last. 
This was home. 
He was at peace.
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