Y/N: Can I have more some candy, De?
Dean: What did Sam say?
Y/N: He said no
Dean: Then why would I say yes?
Y/N: Cause he’s not the boss of you
Dean: *internally* It’s a trap, it’s a trap, it’s a-
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Fake Dean: “I’m the real Dean!”
Dean: “No, I’m the real Dean!”
Castiel: “Which one do we kill?!”
Sam: “There’s only one way to find out.”
Castiel: *Nods*
Sam: “What’s 3 times 9?”
Fake Dean: “27!”
Sam, shooting fake Dean: “Wrong answer.”
Castiel: “3 times 9 is 27!”
Sam: “Yeah, but that wouldn’t have been Deans answer.”
Castiel: “What?”
Sam, pointing at Dean: “That would’ve been Deans answer.”
Dean, glaring at Sam after counting on his fingers before walking away: “You know I failed math, so why you asking me- You know what? I don’t have to explain, I don’t gotta explain anything to you. Get out, get out of my face!”
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Drunk!Y/N: Hey, I-I just want you to know that I think I have like a big crush on you
Dean:
Dean: Sweetheart, we’ve been married for three years
Drunk!Y/N:
Drunk!Y/N: So, does that mean you like me back, or-
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demon: I'm going to kill your husband!
Dean: my what?
demon: the angel *points at Cas*
Dean: he's not my husband?
demon: *slams fist* WHY NOT?!
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funniest thing about cas is that he's literally everything. he's a pta mom. he's an eldritch horror. he's as old as time. he's just learning how to live. he's a girlboss. he's a pathetic little man. he's a romantic. he has lost faith in love. he's the best dad ever. he's a panicking first time parent. all of those things are true at the same time
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Dean: Hey, do you know how to play the trumpet?
Y/N: No, why?
Dean: *shrugging* Sam’s been getting on my nerves lately so I felt like the best way to return the favor would be to learn how to play
Y/N: Technically, you don’t need to know how to play to annoy him
Dean:
Dean: You’ve just opened my eyes
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Cas: has anyone ever told you that they love you?
Dean: do parents count?
Cas: yes
Dean: then no
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Dean: I’m bike selectional
Dean: I’m bisectional
Sam: take your time
Dean: men
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