#spirit week doesnt exist

[balancethescales]

thinking about the specific moments where the berzatto family falls in love with sydney (because of course they do, everyone does).

for richie, it takes the end of the beef and right up till the opening of the bear to happen. he is full of contempt and grief when he meets her and all he knows is that when he looks at her face he is afraid. he doesn’t like that feeling. richie is not a man who finds himself fearful a lot, but she is everything he is not and nothing that he is and he hates himself for it. if she is what it means to be passionate, then what is he? is he nothing but an empty shell of mikey, stuck on earth to shake his fist at passing clouds, because how dare they move and continue on like mikey was nothing to them, as if he wasn’t the very point that the earth revolved around? everyone is leaving him behind, and she is proudly leading the pack. it’s not right. but then— he gets it. he talks to garrett and jess and chef terry and he sees sydney in every corner of that restaurant. the fear slowly is replaced with respect as the week goes on and he realizes that just because she’s good doesn’t mean she’s out to get him. that’s the berzatto upbringing in him doing the talking, but it doesn’t have to, because shes a berzatto now, maybe not officially (not yet, but mark his words, she will be) but she is, and that’s not how she does things. so, he lets her lead them into the future to something good and different and better.

for sugar, it’s instant. she was born to a mother who is triggered by her very existence, and it has hurt her all her life. she is full of love and the one person she wants to give it to the most doesn’t want any part of it. she was born to give but is surrounded by those who are afraid to even take it, to reach out their hand and meet her in the middle. and if they cant take then they themselves have nothing to give, so she gets used to being the one who has to force feed her love down their throats, because if no one does, if no one shows them that they are worthy of good things, then they will crumble (“if i just talked to him more—” “no, nat—” “if i had just—” “it’s not your fault, honey. it’s never been.”). but when she meets sydney, it’s like looking into a mirror. she sees her bright eyes and soft smiles and careful but strong hands and instantly recognizes her for what she is: a giver. and sugars heart swells with even more love than she thought possible, because finally, she’s not alone— there is someone else there to slowly, albeit subconsciously, take care of her crumbling family, to show them that despite what their mother may have taught them, its okay to not be okay (she tries her best not to cry when syd asks her if shes okay, but she does. and syd doesnt grab her face or yell at her or call her stupid. she makes her a meal. and sugar cries some more).

for cicero, the love isn’t instant, and it’s not even entirely love. she is strong and she is assertive, but that also makes her naive and a very expensive risk. she makes him curious for what’s to come, intrigued by the way she doesn’t back down from carmy whose voice so often mimics the berzattos that came before him (“you’re better than this, kid.” “i don’t know what i am.” “whatever it is, it’s not this.”). she's self assured and knows her place in the establishment and is unafraid to let people know it. it’s a refreshing change of pace from mikey, who often resorted to intimidation to get his way, or carmy, who’s anxiety envelopes him and distracts him from what’s right there in front of him. but she is not them. she is focused and on track and is willing to put in the work to get what she wants. he doesn’t visit the bear often, only drops by once in a while to deliver bad news or to fulfill a favour or to just enjoy some good food, but when he does, she is always there, dedicated to ensuring that carmy and michaels, and now, her dream stays alive. she is good for his family, and he trusts her to keep the berzatto spirit alive.

for michelle, it’s quite simple. she always looked out for carmy, their little bear, so when she meets her it’s a family thanksgiving party at the bear and syd stumbles out of the kitchen, obviously frazzled and a little sweaty (“carmy, im not ready, i didn’t even change yet and the turk—” “don’t worry, tina will take care of it, you look great, they’ll love you, they just really wanted to meet you—”), but she’s smiling. she’s a little awkward when she introduces herself, and michelle finds herself endeared by her nervous ramble (“it’s, uh, really nice to meet you guys. sorry, i didn’t know that i was going to be pulled out of the kitchen so soon. uh, im sydney. yeah, i guess carmy already told you guys, huh? um. im sorry, how are you related to the family again? i mean, i dont want to offend but it’s just. uh. well, you guys are just very... normal?”) and she’ll laugh and look at stanley and the two of them will think to themselves, good job carmy, she’s a good one, before telling syd something dumb and nonsensical about a genetic mutation and richie interrupts to tell michelle it’s not a genetic mutation it’s called being boring and syd will laugh and michelle will too, truly happy that their little bear found someone normal, a breath of fresh air within the smoke of their family.

for donna, it’s weird. it’s tense. they don’t meet for a long time. they don’t meet at the bear when it first opens and not at the bear even when it has found it’s footing, but by chance. they are somewhere mundane (a grocery store, a park, or maybe just the street) and there is no other family member around when syd meets the berzatto matriarch. she only knows what donna looks like from photos at sugars house because carmys apartment is devoid of any actual sentiment (although that has begun to change since she made him get an actual dresser and he dedicated one of the drawers to her stuff). she calls out to her by her name, and donna turns around startled. she doesn’t recognize syd, of course, who introduces herself and informs her of who she is to the family. when donna smiles it’s not a real one, and syd knows this, but it doesn’t deter her. she tells donna that her kids love her (“even after everything, nat?” “she’s our mother. its all that we can do.”) and that her kids are great (“carmy, you are not broken.” “im a little broken.” “no, listen to me, the fact that you are still here, means something. its something.”) and that there will always be a table for her at the bear (“chef, someones calling in for a reso for 1 but we’re all full up… except for—“ “yo, dont finish that sentence. table 7 for ms. berzatto is an indefinite booking. is that understood?” “yes, chef”). donnas smile fades and her chest fills with anger but just as she’s about to explode in typical berzatto fashion syd interrupts her. she has faced the bear many a time before and has handled herself with grace and dignity everytime, so this is no different. she smiles brightly and thanks donna for listening to her and hopes she considers coming in, because she’d really like to cook for her. she looks like she needs a good meal. she deserves one. she turns and walks away. donnas stomach growls. that night, table 7 is occupied for the first time since the bear opened its doors.

and carmy? well, there isn’t an exact moment. its a culmination of awkward partnership (“i don’t want to be shitty.” “okay, then dont be.”) and flawless teamwork (“the menu needs—” “already on it, chef.”) and nights unwinding at the bar down the street (“of course you drink an old fashioned.” “what’s that supposed to mean?” “nothing, it’s just very… tortured-chef-from-the-slums-of-chicago of you”) and spontaneous phone calls just to hear the others voice (“why are you whispering?” “i… don’t know. my dads home. its a habit.” “you’re 27.” “and you’re white, you wouldn’t get it.”) till they’re just inseparable (“cousin, wheres carmy?” “with syd, duh.” “why'd i even ask?”). and then, sydney and carmen become something else. something tender and sweet and terrifying and beautiful all mixed together into… something. there’s no word for what they have. but it feels so right; to the guests who taste their food and recognize that the hands who put it together are full of love and care; to the staff at the bear who see the unspoken communication, the lingering touches, and their soft eyes that seem to always be on the other; to the berzatto family who notice that carmy looks a little brighter, and shakes a little less. yes, its love, but its so much more. it’s syd and carmy. it always has been, and always will be.

(“can i ask you something? something corny and lame and gross?” “always.” “when did you, like, know?” “know what?” “like, when did you know that you loved me? like, not as a chef or a friend, but as... y'know.” “that’s very middle school of you to ask.” “shut up, i did warn you.” “…” “so?” “its, uh, i don’t, i don’t know.” “well, that’s rude.” “no, i mean, i can’t say its one moment because... it was all of them. together. like, one moment you’re staging and then everything happened and, and, keeps happening but the next thing i knew you were there and you always were there and i just knew that i never wanted you to not be there.” “that’s…. really, really, disgusting, and frankly, a little unprofessional.” “oh, fuck off.” “no, like, i knew you were obsessed with me, but wow, that is a whole new other level.” “fuck you, get off of me, don’t touch me.” “no no no, please—” “i let you into my family—” “let me?” “into my restaurant—” “i think you mean OUR restaurant—” “only for you to humiliate me in my own bed? how dare you.” “…are you sulking?” “…” “…carmy?” “syd?” “me too.” “…heard, chef. now come back here.”)

(and it’s unspoken, but everyone knows that michael would’ve loved her too. i mean, she’s sydney fucking adamu, she conquered the bear. how could anyone not love her?)

#this is just a love letter to sydney adamu #because she is everything right with the world #she’s got that dawg (re: bear) in her #the bear #the bear fx #the bear hulu #sydney adamu #ayo edibiri #carmen berzatto #jeremy allen white #richie jerimovich #natalie berzatto #cicero the bear #cousin michelle the bear #donna berzatto #michael berzatto #sydcarmy #sydney x carmy #carmy x sydney

[leolingo]

waking up and seeing dream’s rip off project just breaks my heart man what the hell qsmp barely had two weeks to shine and now he’s introducing a VERY similar project in larger scale and uglier graphics and its just “the two are allowed to co-exist?” be fucking serious for a second dude why are you doing this NOW at the height of a project spearheaded by someone that used to call you a friend? like just . logistically speaking comercially speaking when you see how obviously similar these concepts are Why would you announce it now when you know someone else is getting the spotlight for once.

its hard not to call it spite or jealousy or anything of the sort when we cant confirm the timelines of this new project’s development but it REALLY, really feels like something unkind. not only that but it feels really gross to see most aspects of quackity’s passion project warped into something worse.. like LIVE TRANSLATION? really? bc dream of course wouldnt expect people to try and learn the different languages to communicate. he probably doesnt understand how redundant and ultimately hindering it will be to rely 100% on automated translation because 1) he’s not bilingual nor does he make any effort to understand the bilingual experience 2) he has no actual interest in the learning process of foreign languages or the different linguistic communities on twitch and in content creation in general . which makes me wonder WHY he is leading this and very likely profitting off of it when there’s no real reason for him to associate himself with this kind of cultural project other than . wanting to be relevant i guess.

during squidcraft, i didnt see him attempt a single word in spanish. i saw dream use google translate or straight up speak english (fast, idiomatic english at that) to spanish speakers and otherwise not try to meet a communicative middle-ground in any way. if this is how he intends to take on “united SMP” i cant wait to see it fail.

quackity’s project is successful because he cares. its modeled after his own experience and thrives because he as a bilingual host is able to cater to both communities within it and work as a linguistic bridge when need be. which, as we have watched day after day on qsmp streams, becomes less and less necessary because the environment quackity is fostering is actually very concrete INCENTIVE FOR LANGUAGE LEARNING. people are actually interacting and having meaningful linguistic/cultural exchanges that actually LEAD TO LANGUAGE KNOWLEDGE AND UNDERSTANDING. how the fuck is that supposed to happen if theres live translation? ill tell you now, it won’t.

when we study linguistics in college one of the first things we learn in regards to foreign language teaching is that translation methods rarely fuckjng work. by doing that youre limiting human interaction and actually DISTURBING the learning possibilities because youre taking away Real, varied input. dream doesnt know what he’s doing and its so upsetting to watch. dont even get me started on “language rankings” or whatever the fuck the competitive aspect is supposed to be

the project is just so flawed and the timing couldnt be worse. quackity is doing such a great job and? you just try to hijack his idea like this even though you clearly lack both the heart and the knowledge to make something like this work? to me it just appears so sour. so mean-spirited and uninspired. i dont even know man i just dont like it

#dream neg #united smp #big big rant #i just hate this fucking guy #mine

[ecoamerica]

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[pinkheart22]

MIDNIGHTS MANIFEST x TTPD

In the context of library science, a manuscript is defined as any hand-written item in the collections of a library or an archive. For example, a library's collection of hand-written letters or diaries is considered a manuscript collection.

Taylor writes handwritten notes. Taylor keeps diaries. This is her collection.

In Cornelia Street, she says "We were a fresh page on the desk Filling in the blanks as we go."

This album comes from the Desk of Taylor Swift and in Lavender Haze she wants to "get it off her chest, and get it off her desk."

From Taylor's tiktok Calendar of Events for Midnights release week it says "MANIFEST" underneath "Taylor Swift Midnights".(see photo below) I think this is referring to that The Midnights album IS the Manifest.

Manifest can mean : be evidence of; to prove. // show (a quality or feeling) by one's acts. // clear or obvious to the eye or mind. // (of an ailment) become apparent through the appearance of symptoms. // (of a ghost or spirit) appear. // to manifest something into existence.

This fits with the album Midnights and the release of TTPD afterwards.

Lets look into these meanings in relation to Midnights and TTPD and The Manuscript

to be evidence of - Midnights album shows evidence of whats to lead up to in TTPD. In Hits different Taylor says " I find the artifacts" "I trace the evidence, make it make some sense" It says "Artifacts" on each file/bonus track released so far for TTPD.

show a feeling of one acts - Midnights tells the feelings the actions of both her and her lover had on each other.

clear or obvious - its become clear in Midnights that he is losing her. She learns in Bejeweled when she decides to reclaim the land. I think Hits Different and You're Losing Me sum up the events of the whole album.

an ailment of symptoms - my heart wont start anymore- youre losing me // I wanted that pain, midnight rain // Sadness became my whole sky, bejeweled, // It only hurts this much right now, labyrinth// my sadness is contagious, hits different // etc. etc.

of a ghost or spirit - All of the people I've ghosted stand there in the room, anti-hero & I used to switch out these Kens, I'd just ghost, hits different - the TTPD album color of THE MANUSCRIPT is Ghosted White

you could also say Manifest can mean to think about something often and with focus until you receive it. It's the idea that if you want something, you can mentally attend to it and will it into existence.

In Midnights she wants to stay in that "Lavender Haze", manifesting to stay there for as long as she can. "I just wanna stay in that lavender haze" She also manifests in "PARIS" she sings "I wanna brainwash you Into loving me forever" then "Let the only flashing lights be the tower at midnight In my mind"

The flashing lights could be in reference to when there is warning signs they flash at you, but she doesnt want to see them, shes trying to ignore them.

She stares at the ceiling in LAVENDER HAZE and She draws a map on her bedroom ceiling in PARIS which connects the two songs.

bonus thought: In DEAR READER she says "Dear reader Get out your map, pick somewhere and just run" - She's realized that she shouldn't draw a map on the bed room ceiling but get out a real map.

Basically what I'm getting at is that this whole time Midnights has been a Manifest of whats to come in TTPD. She has been keeping TTPD a secret for 2 years, and wrote/recorded You're Losing Me in 2021 which would line up both albums simultaneously.

It seems to be a sister album like folklore and evermore are to each other.

This is just my theory. I do not claim to know anything about Taylor and her relationships. This is purely an opinion and observation from her album Midnights and little information about TTPD

Posted March 1 2024

@taylorswift @taylornation

#taylor swift #taylorswift #taylurking #taylornation #ttpd #ts11 #the tortured poets department #the eras tour #eras tour #midnights #the manuscript #ttpd the manuscript #the tortured poets society #ts theories #ts the eras tour #taylor swift the master mind #taylor swift the tortured poets department #taylor swift theories #taylor swift the woman that you are #taylor swift the archer #taylor swift the eras tour #swifties #t swift #taylor swift eras #taylor alison swift #midnights manifest #midnights taylor swift #midnights era #midnights album #midnights 3am edition

[ohtobearandomftblog]

the stars never forget

well, they are able to forget in the short-term, but everything comes back eventually. be it memory magic (mest was able to affect loke), time (the spirits never mentioned the eclipse that sent the dragon slayers forward in time), or excessive trauma (... probably also the eclipse gate, actually)

spirits remember the beginning of time, the end of time, and everything within and outside that rigid format.

aquarius is able to see the markings of the very first heartfilia in lucy. she looks at her and, sometimes, forgets when she is

sagittarius remembers every animal to exist on earthland. hes not sure any currently alive even make the top 100 of his favorites

ultear and dimaria arent even close to the only mages who use time-based magic. their usage of it is fairly tame, compared to those of years long passed and years never to be seen. no matter how many times someone messes with the timeline, the spirits remember

taurus remembers the faces of everyone he has ever protected. if they had one, that is. hes not sure he likes the running tally he has, of how many features and names can be attributed to those long since dead

capricorn hates nothing more than getting information wrong because of the butterfly effect. how was he meant to keep the pasts separate when they were so similar? it should not hurt so much that he doesnt even know who were 'truly' his masters

do you know how much it hurts, to be unwillingly thrown back in time something as small as a week, and see people that do not recognize you? to be thrown further and further back, months to years to decades, and have the people you hold close not know you? not even be born yet? possibly never to be, if you put one single toe out of line

gemi and mini remember a time when the agria sisters were together the whole time, never separated, never criminals, never taken advantage of. they feel more sadness than hate that the sisters were split, that they ended up with sorano, that sorano turned to the oración seis

leo twitches and never takes his eyes off of sorano, whenever hes summoned in her presence. he remembers, more so than anyone else, of a time when aries was the cause of karen's death. of when leo was the one taken by angel. of when leo was further abused and tortured by those who shouldve protected him as he does them. and he cant do anything about it. not now, when it was aries taken by angel, when he wasnt abused again, when he cant talk about it. she wasnt terrible to him in this time, so who was he to blame her for another's actions?

he says his wariness is because of what she did to aries and scorpio and gemi and mini. lucy doesnt fully believe him. he cant say anything, though, because what if this changes the timeline again? they already messed up, with the existence of 'loke' instead of 'kirase'. what if another point against angel means lucy actively antagonizes her? they need her still, yes they do, they need sorano for future fights, so he cant say a damn thing

#if you cant tell ive been having more thoughts about the spirits *coughLOKEcough* #fairy tail #fairy tail headcanons #fairy tail celestial spirits #fairy tail spirits #fairy tail loke #fairy tail aquarius #fairy tail sagittarius #fairy tail capricorn #fairy tail taurus #fairy tail gemini #fairy tail leo

[kimerawrt]

DP Promp The chained ghost king

An idea of a fic i will probably not write, so here i am screaming it into the void

By right of contest danny can be king of the ghost zone but he refuses, the observants are very persistent, they want someone to bear the crown so the zone is in balance, between the two halfas that defeated pariah dark, phantom was the less likely to bring more chaos

After way too many refusal from danny the observants decide to take drastic measures, one day danny wakes up chained to the old throne of the king, his wrists and ankles had chains on them, the crown that was always too big for his head rest in his shoulders, the crown is chained to him and the throne

Danny panics and tries everything to escape, the chains let him move around but not much, he tries transforming to escape but doesnt matter in what form the chains remains and he is trapped, he struggles until he is too tired to move

Later the observants appear before him and tell him that he has to accept the crown and become king to be free of those chains, danny refuses as always and the observants just say that is just a matter of time for him to accept their deal and leave him alone

Everyday danny fights against the chains and everyday he fails, he pulls so hard for so long that the chains cut into his skin and the spikes of the crown dig into his face even drawing his ecto-blood, danny fights for days, then weeks and maybe years, time is impossible to tell in there, the throne heals him everytime he passes out, that makes danny try harder and gain more scars as time passes

Danny wonders if this is how pariah dark became the tyrant king, because he is not the king and has no plan to be anyone trying to summon the ghost king would not be able to summon him, danny can only hope for direct rescue before he goes crazy

-----------------------------------------

Now there are many possibilities:

+danny could go crazy for that torture, accepts the crown just so he can unleash his reign of terror worse than what dan could ever do

+danny never gets rescued, goes crazy but doesnt accept the crown and lives a miserable existence

+he gets rescued by his friends or enemies (human or ghost doesnt matter) and has a long recovery after that with a side of kicking observant ecto-butts

(crossover possibility)

+heroes have ghost problem and cause they cant summon ghost king they go to him for help and/or confront, they find kind in chains and rescue him

+villain tries to find ghost king to get power, they somehow get to danny and free him in exchange of power, danny is desperate enough to accept at that point

+someone in another dimension from danny tries to summon a guardian spirit/ghost because they need help, they can summon phantom but he still has the chains and knows if he goes back he will be chained to the throne again, desperate danny makes deal with summoner so he can stay free for longer and maybe find a way to break the chains in that new place

#Danny Phantom #ghost king danny #crossover #fic i will prob not write #anyone can use this

[lavenderarts]

Um.. this isn't supposed to be hate or anything, i just think that you while having the right spirit of support, are like, kind of having a bit of terf retoric yourself..?

I definitly agree that a trans man should not, EVER feel the need to identify as lesbian to be valid. Thats definitly right!! Nobody EVER should be forced to appease the terfs.

But also,

lesbianism should be about love of women, not about the exclusion of men.. THATS the terf retoric..

Sometimes peoples gender identity is more complicated than you think. Sometimes people are men and men adjacent, but identify with labels for their own identity for how they FEEL they are. And i think, it is like, its not nice to try and police labels.

Lesbianism historically has been more inclusive than just "'only-women' who like 'only-women'", it is more mixed then just having NOT-MEN in it, it is only of the recent decade that the discourse of lesbianism has become so esclusive, so vehamently avoidant of anything "man", because of, you guess it, terfs. Terfs are so hateful of men and trans men espcially.. its all messed up, please research it up i can not even come close to saying everything here!

other peopls should identify as they like, even if it makes little sense to others, yes we are all lgbt+ but that doesnt mean specific labels are not important to those who use it! Everyone is indiviual !

Ive been seeing weird lesbian discourse this week and it makes me sad, this is not your fault, but, please be careful, don't fall into your own policing of identities..

Also I apologize for the long ask, I genuinly only want everybody to be more open minded. Thank you for reading ;;;

Y'all hate lesbians so fucking god damn much. You think we're all TERFs and everything we say about our own identity is TERF rhetoric automatically because YOU associate US with those hateful hags. Me saying men aren't lesbians isn't TERF-adjacent because men does not automatically refer to trans women, and if you assume that's what I'm saying it says more about you than about me. Me saying lesbianism excludes men isn't TERF rhetoric, it's fact. Lesbians telling you that our sexuality is the only fucking one in existence where men are not welcome in any way isn't a TERF thing at all. The fact that we have to qualify everything we say about ourselves with "don't worry I'm not talking about trans women :)" because otherwise you think we're TERFs is a you fucking problem, not me. Not all TERFs are lesbians and not all lesbians are TERFs, and saying the completely normal, rational, and correct sentence "Trans men are men and men cannot be lesbians and people who are attracted to men cannot be lesbians" is not hateful or wrong. I don't care how cool you think the word lesbian is, sometimes it doesn't apply to you and you need to get a grip on that, we aren't some secret exclusive club that needs to be opened and made more accommodating. Lesbianism IS about loving women, and it is also the only sexuality that has nothing to do with men in any way, shape, or form, and the rest of you just cannot handle it and are constantly trying to hammer the definition into something that doesn't sound like a dirty word to you because you have some internalized shit you need to work out on your own away from dykes

Genuinely shut the fuck up I am not here to hold your hand and make you feel better because you're sooooo sad that lesbians are talking about issues that affect us. Take your condescending dumb ass elsewhere PLEASE I'm so sowwy I made you feel bad bc I wasn't Nice :((((((

#telling people to kys has to become acceptable again. calling me a fucking terf for saying men arent lesbians is so lesbophobic its unreal #get the fuck off my blog and dont come back

[bigprettygothgf]

what's your opinion of the malenia fight? i know you've bodied her like totally so you have some actual insight but idr seeing if you ever spoke in depth about it

i kept going back and forth on it but at the end of the day i think i really like it, to me presentation has always mattered a slight bit more than actual gameplay when it comes to bosses in these games (which is part of why i love oceiros so much even tho that boss gameplay wise is meh at best and a janky mess at worst) and she soars in that regard, that transition cutscene is 👌👌👌

and i do actually enjoy the fight itself too, correctly reacting to her is extremely satisfying once you get the hang of how her ai works. my issues with her mostly come down to how big of an impact difference in rolling weight makes on her, an issue that has never really existed to a meaningful capacity on any prior boss. you are at a noticeable disadvantage if youre not lightrolling. not that mid rolling is like impossible or whatever but it will make several things she does more annoying. take her triple slash she does for example, if you dont roll into her at medium weight it will hit you, a problem that doesnt exist when lightrolling. her spirit attack in phase 2 also becomes significantly more difficult to avoid. and then ofc theres waterfowl. the only thing i actually dislike about it is that first hitbox. its stupid. i dont have a problem with moves that are difficult to dodge, thats a good and necessary thing in hard fights, the problem is that the way to avoid that first hit isnt even remotely intuitive and unless you get lucky yourself most people are just not gonna wanna bothering figuring out how youre actually supposed to avoid it without someone else showing them how, and i cant blame them. a lot of people greatly exaggerated how bad it (and malenia in general) is in the weeks and months following elden ring's release but that doesnt change the fact that the first hit is still kind of ridiculous

oh theres also the fact that she cheats and can for some reason just interrupt and armor through your punishes but that annoys me less as time goes on. its whatever. it happens infrequently enough that it doesnt really piss me off

but anyway shes fine, idk about being one of the best but ill admit my perspective is a little skewed thanks to the aforementioned frequent bodying lol

#mansematu

[storiesofsvu]

Scary Movie Nights with Tara

Tara Lewis x reader Covers the "movie night" square for @adarafaelbarba fall bingo! @aphinablog req'd "scary stories" and that's how this started out but by the end I feel like it fits the movie night one more! If you read and like, don't forget to ask to be added to the Tara taglist!! Also I got halfway through this as i struggled to find movies cause I *love* thrillers before I remembered AJ is the main character in Final Destination 2. So either pretend that doesnt exist OR that Tara, yn & the team poke fun at JJ each year… your choice..

Tara had never been a fan of Halloween, specifically the ghost stories that came hand in hand with it.

She felt that they were too fake, constantly rolling her eyes at the matter before walking away from whatever group was telling them

Because she had witnessed a million more actual real life situations that were a million times worse than any scary story that anyone could come up with.

As much as you loved scary movies, stories and the like she couldn’t help but scoff letting out little laughs through the films as she did her best not to correct the things that were horribly wrong

She only put up with it because she loved you more than anything else in the world. At the beginning of your relationship she’d tried her best to guide you away from the obsession, but you had no plans of the like. Despite your true crime obsession, you always assured her that you would never pry into her work and if something you watched or heard turned out to be something she’d worked on, you’d immediately turn to something else while she was around and leave it out of the small talk when you caught each other up on your weeks.

When you’d met Tara you did your best to swap from true crime things to fictional, busying your time with horror films that were far from the truth, the paranormal, the cliched franchises and she very much appreciated that.

It was every October, like perfect clockwork she would come home from work to find you perched on the couch, gigantic bowl of popcorn in your lap with all the lights off while your eyes were practically glued to the television as the opening credits of a movie rolled across the screen.

The team had eaten on the jet, and you’d sent a text saying you’d had take out earlier, so she grabbed a glass of wine and despite not really wanting to know what you were watching, she did want to spend time with her girlfriend, so she slightly begrudgingly joined you on the couch.

A few moments in she made a comment that whatever you were watching had a weird vibe to it for a slasher film

“It’s not. It’s more thriller vibes. There isn’t an actual killer, person or spirit. It’s called Final Destination, there’s like six of them.”

“Okay…”

“Spoiler alert, the plane’s gonna blow up. And that kid” you pointed “is currently having a premonition about it and he freaks out, gets off the plane with like, five other kids, and then the plane does blow up. But they escaped their deaths so it’s like, death itself haunting them in bizarre accidents til it gets them all.”

“that’s fucking weird.”

You let out a little chuckle as Tara settled in next to you, an arm casually thrown over the back of the couch for you to nestle into her embrace. She started out scrolling through her phone, replying to a couple of last minute emails and texts but she found her attention being pulled to the television more and more as the movie went on, curious and curiouser as to how it was all going to end and what kind of wild deaths were about to occur.

By the end of it her complete attention was on the movie and you looked to her with a sly grin on your face. “you were paying attention”

“it was intriguing.” She shrugged, picking up her phone again as if to shake away your insinuation.

“you liked it….”

“i..just.. it’s a different take from the usual crap you watch. I don’t end up profiling through the whole movie or have to worry about ghosts slamming our doors in the middle of the night.”

“okay…” you laughed, moving from the couch to refill both of your wine glasses and returning to the couch.

“how many of these are there?” tara asked quietly as you nestled back in beside her under the blanket.

“six? Seven?”

She glanced to her watch and let out a sigh of defeat, “I guess we’ve got time for at least one more…”

“Yes!” you shriek, leaping towards her to pepper her face with kisses, “I knew that one day I’d find one you wouldn’t totally hate!”

“and you’re going to make me watch all seven every Halloween, aren’t you?”

“you know it babe!”

“god you’re lucky I love you”

“and I love you too.” You pressed a soft kiss to her lips before grabbing the remote and pressing play on movie number two.

That was exactly how a new tradition was born. The week of Halloween you’d watch one movie a night together, and then you’d swap over to the more family friendly Halloween movies that Tara preferred, ones with little to no killing. It was all the balance you needed to make autumn enjoyable all around by all parties.

She also got back at you hardcore by inviting Spencer over one of your solo movie nights, and naturally he spent the entire time going over statistics, likelihoods, profiling and calling out all the bullshit of the entertainment industry and things they got wrong.

By the end of that night you claimed that the Scream franchise was ruined, shooting a glare to Tara, returning the “you’re lucky I love you” sentiment from the year prior.

#tara lewis #tara lewis x reader #adarafaelbarbatrickortreatbingo #criminal minds #criminal minds fanfic

[battleangel]

Ghost In The Capitalist Machine

The West, in service of capitalism and the medical and pharmaceutical industrial complexes, purposely severs the mind-body connection.

Just like corporate silos teams, departments and functions from one another within individual companies so that noone is ever really communicating and truly collaborating with one another, the West purposely silos your mind, body, heart, soul and spirit from one another so that nothing is truly holistically integrative and aligned.

This sets it up for it to be very difficult for you to ever experience your ego death, discover the true self, self-awaken, self-actualize, self-ascend, align and activate all seven chakras, open your third eye, experience a kundalini awakening, activate your pineal gland, receive esoteric downloads from the Akashic library and realize that what we call "reality" is actually a 3D three dimensional virtual reality videogame simulation of the actual real reality, which is the 10D ten dimensional dreamscape which we all travel to every night when we "fall" asleep and "dream", rapid eye movement "REM sleep" and "dreaming" is nothing but you shifting your consciousness via modulating your brainwaves and entering a meditative state that allows you to temporarily shift yourself back to the dreamscape from which you originated.

The 10D ten dimensional dreamscape is every possibility at one time, its the Big Bang, its traveling at light speed, its lush, its lurid, its visceral, its a kaleidoscopic explosion, its a constellation of lights, its walking through walls and walking on water, its falling endlessly through the sky without dying, its limitless, endless, eternal -- its your imagination.

Intrinsically, this just makes sense. We all know our mind and our imagination is the one thing that has no limits, no limitations, cant be controlled. We can think of anything we want. Thats all the dreamscape is.

We all originated from a kemetic explosion of source energy and love that created all of us at an infinity inflection point that, at the moment it happened, shot eternally into the past and into the future and in that one moment all living beings, aliens, humans, angels, creatures, unicorns, mermaids, sirens, vampires, werewolves, universes, star systems, galaxies, planets, nebulas, black holes, wormholes, suns, moons, stars, comets, asteroids, event horizons and supernovas were created in that one instant shot out eternally over all of time.

Our time in "reality" -- where I am typing this and you are reading this -- is very short-lived versus the eternity in which we have all existed in the dreamscape.

"Reality" is just a very temporary manifestation of our eternal energetic limtless selves as physical human beings and we are simply here to rediscover our true eternal selves by awakening, ascending, and self actualizing to our 3rd eye open selves after killing our own egos.

You have to kill your ego.

You have the ability to heal yourself from 90%+ of the physical and mental maladies and dis-eases.

But then that doesnt make Sudafed, Robitussin, Dimetapp, Vicks, Mucinex and Halls any money.

So, they suppress and sabotage your natural ability to heal yourself and natures ability to naturally heal you and invariably, no matter what the issue is, they are going to suggest a pill, a shot and/or a knife.

They wont ask if your gastrointestinal issues are being caused by anxiety at work, abuse in your relationship at home, stress from living paycheck to paycheck like 80% of all Americans, depression from being laid off and having your worker bee work slave identity obliterated, they wont ask how youre feeling emotionally and mentally, they wont ask when the last time was that you were out in the sun just to bask in natural sunlight, breathe fresh air, be near trees, walk barefoot in grass, they wont ask if you sit at a desk all week every week for 40 to 60+ hours chained to your desk non stop Slack email Teams Google Meet notifications non stop demands only getting up for a half hour or hour max to grab lunch from Wendys KFC Taco Bell Burger King McDs Sonics Arbys Chick Fil A Subway Five Guys before running right back to your desk the milisecond lunch is over for hours of useless masturbatory self-aggrandizing agendaless meetings noone actually needs to sit back down and work the rest of your life away...

They'll just grab a notepad, scribble an Rx for a chemical stimulant and laxative, tell you to try to drink more water then move on to the next patient on the assembly line.

Youre not a person, just a "digestive system thats out of whack".

Then they never try to get to the root causes of why its "out of wack" -- environmental, lifestyle, mental, diet, work, relationships, finances, social -- they just give you a stimulant and laxative and tell you to call them in the morning.

Most modern OTC medicine (Sudafed, Benadryl, etc) and pharmaceuticals (presciption medications) are toxic, synthetic, lab made, harmful, unnecessary and at the absolute most typically just temporarily mitigate symptoms without actually alleviating and resolving them.

A quick fix that isnt even a fix yet is relentlessly pushed on us from the literal time we are children.

Pop a pill, get a shot, get Tylelon from the school nurse, swallow your Dimetapp.

Pepto Bismol, Advil, Tylelnol, Excedrin, Bayer, Midol, Pamprin, Zyrtec, Allegra.

The relentless societal lie that modern medicine is the supposed answer and cure to all of lifes ills is simply to endlessly fuel and fund the OTC drug and pharmaceutical companies and industries to the tune of hundreds of billions of dollars a year.

The vast majority of physical and mental issues and maladies can be resolved naturally through medicinal herbs & plants, essential oils, breathwork, regulating nervous & PSNS, regulating vasovagus nerve, daily movement, being in nature (natural sunlight + fresh air + trees) every day for 20 minutes to an hour, sound healing baths, mhz audio, self healing reiki, yoga exercises, stretching, meditation, journaling, daily creative expression, self reflection, introspection, drinking 64+ oz of water a day, eating fresh fruits & vegetables 80%+ of the time, minimizing meat intake, minimizing soda, juice, caffeine, cofee and alcohol, eliminating processed and prepackaged snacks, minimizing sugar, fat, sodium, gluten & dairy, avoiding toxic and synthetic chemicals, GMOs, pesticides, additives, preservatives & artificial flavors in food, drinks, household & personal care products.

Counterbalance constant indoor artificial unnatural lighting and indoor recycled unnatural air, air conditioning & heat which purposely and by design disrupts our circadian rhythym, depletes our melatonin levels, contributes to insomnia and sleep disorders by ensuring you go outside in nature every day for a walk whenever weather allows for 20 to 60 minutes a day to soak in natural non-artificial non-fluorescent lighting aka sunlight, breathe in fresh unrecycled air, be around trees, put barefeet in grass, go in streams if possible...🏞🏞🏞

Modern society purposely severs our connection to nature by keeping us penned indoors like animals at almost all times (home; school; work; cars/buses/trains; malls/theaters/restaurants/salons/stores).

We are either inside of a building or we are inside of an artificial machine on our way to a building 99%+ of the time and this is totally and completely unnatural, toxic, harmful, dangerous and deadly.

Nature naturally heals us as well as activating our own natural self-healing properties which is why they do everything they can to keep us penned up inside like animals at all times.

Attending school, working, streaming, binge watching, scrolling, social media, gaming, messaging apps, reality TV, sports, competition shows, malls, movie theaters, restaurants, stores, salons, cars, buses, trains, prisons, daycares, grooming everyone to expect and demand total comfort in environment at all times - 70 degrees air conditioning in summer & 80 degree heat in the winter -- anything and everything to keep us indoors at almost all times and never outside in nature.

The National Institutes of Health (NIH) cautions against taking unnecessary antibiotics as most sinus problems are caused by viruses, which antibiotics don’t treat and even those brought on by bacteria don’t usually improve any faster with antibiotics, the agency says.

So, whats an alternative to antibiotics?

Ive had severe sinus, nasal and chest congestion all week. I havent been able to lay down comfortably or sleep for more than an hour at a time. I have also had a pressure headache in my sinus and forehead area. My chest is also extremely congested and filled with mucus and I have been coughing non-stop.

Is it time to get the Mucinex? Antibiotics?

No.

2 tbsp of apple cider vinegar in warm water and a squeeze of lemon juice.

Peppermint herbal tea with 1/4 tsp each of ginger, cinnamon, turmeric and cayenne pepper and a tbsp of honey.

Essential oils in a diffuser for 3 to 6 hours (2 to 3 drops each of eucalyptus, peppermint, orange, grapefruit, lemon & cinnamon).

Drink 64+ oz of water.

Blow your nose one nostril at a time, while pressing the other nostril closed, then repeat on the other side. Blowing both nostrils at the same time actually inflames and swells the blood vessels in your sinus which will actually lead to more mucus being produced and can also lead to a sinus infection.

What does traditional indigeous medicine have to say?

Ayurvedic medicine is traditional Indian medicine.

Similar to TCM (tradional Chinese medicome), Ayurveda teaches that physical maladies and diseases are a result of blocked channels or srotamsi just like TCM teaches that physical maladies and diseases are a result of blocked chi or life energy force.

Specifically, Ayurvedic medicine teaches that congestion issues are caused by a mind-body imbalance called Vata which is caused by several factors including excessive stress & changes in climate.

If you were alive this winter, its been hard to ignore that it was 80 degrees on Halloween and I am typing this on December 2nd and its literally in the 40s but the humidity is fucking 91%!

Humidity over 50% means too much of the airs moisture has dried up, the air becomes excessively dry and even indoors it will feel uncomfortable.

So, imagine 91% humidity.

Even with this ridiculous bullshit, nothing substantive is ever done about climate change, same performative bullshit, same pretense on social media, same capitalist excess that has killed millions of humans, made tens of thousands of animal species extinct, currently melting the polar ice caps and glaciers, causing more natural disasters, filling endless landfills, destroying endless rainforests, damaging endless ecosystems, polluting endless oceans, endless carbon footprints, endless fossil fuels, endless Congolese dying for cobalt for a fucking iPhone 15 noone needs, endless overextraction of earths resources, endless raping and pillaging Mother Earth, endless fast fashion landfills filled with SHEIN and Fashion Nova fits that were only worn once, endless landfills filled with Amazon Prime Day deals that were humped pumped and dumped after one use, endless oil and gas, endless coal, endless nuclear waste, endless food waste, endless methane gas, endless fuel emissions, endless highways to nowhere, endless private jets for no fucking reason, endless McMansions constructed, endless overfishing, endless sweatshops, endless exploitation, endless slave wage labor, endless child labor...

Vata mind-body imbalance caused by excessive stress & changes in climate cause symptoms including respiratory congestion, restriction and breathlessness.

I have had severe difficulty breathing this week to the point where it has woken me up as I was unable to breathe.

So...time to grab the Sudafed or Mucinex?

Notice the pattern in Western medicine that any doctor in the West asribes to:

1️⃣OTC medicine➡️

If symptoms not alleviated⬇️

2️⃣Prescription drugs➡️

If symptoms still not alleviated⬇️

3️⃣Surgery➡️

If symptoms still not alleviated⬇️

4️⃣Gaslighting, feigned disbelief, frustration, half-assed suggestions about a "lifestyle change or two".

For every single issue no matter how seemingly benign or innocuous or how easily addressed by the one thing these Western doctors will never ask you: How do you feel NOT physically?

Western medicine dehumanizes and commodifies the human body in the same degrading and militaristic way that capitalism does.

Youre not a person, youre a worker.

Youre not a person, youre a digestive issue, skin rash, migraine, ulcer, sinus infection, erectile dysfunction, vaginal dryness, acne, back pain, tedonitis, neck pain, shoulder pain, tinnitus, food allergy, seasonal allergy, cold, fibroids, hypertension sufferer...

Look at the body part in question, never the person that embodies the body.

There is no ghost in the machine.

This is why your gastroenterologist doesnt talk to your dermatologist who doesnt talk to your rheumatologist who doesnt talk to your ENT doctor who doesnt talk to your general physician who doesnt talk to your gynecologist who doesnt talk to your pain management doctor who never talks to your therapist, psychiatrist, counselor, psychologist or life coach.

Youre not a person, youre a body to be endlessly sectioned off into completely separate and siloed pieces, never to ever be put back together or considered as one holistic entity that is a whole being with not just a body but a heart, mind, soul and spirit.

All 3 "solutions" endlessly, pathetically and purposely pimped by modern Western medicine (OTC & Rx pill, injection/shot, knife/surgery) all have potential harmful and even fatal side effects, include toxins & synthetic chemicals and mostly just mitigate, lessen or temporarily alleviate symptoms at the absolute most and never actually resolve or solve the symptoms entirely nor address or cure the actual root cause of the issue.

Just like everything else in the West.

Crash diet, quickie Vegas wedding, quick nip and tuck.

Everything in the West is wham, bam, thank you ma'am.

Whats the quickest fix and solution where I dont have to miss work?

How do I drop 20 pounds in 2 weeks?

What will make my symptoms go away where I can still eat a Big Mac every week?

The quick fixes that Western medicine promises to us as our eternal salvation and proof of "modern medicine" actually provides nothing more than the most temporary of relief at absolute best.

Thats all the West is.

Quick fixes, bandaids and half-assed "cures" that dont actually cure a damn thing and never actually address the root cause of anything nor even eliminate or the symptoms.

Then its back to school, back to work, back to taking the kids to soccer practice.

Everything in the West is based on total and complete mindlessness.

Congestion can be caused by a cold, the flu, allergies, pollution, COVID-19, or even just dry air.

Like extreme humidity of 75% to 90% in wintertime in freezing temperatures and constant indoor central heating blasting obnoxiously throughout the entire winter season?

Similar to the migraines I had last year where I didnt call my GP for medication and instead I switched my cell phone and laptop to Dark mode, turned off all the lights in my apartment, got off my phone completely and just rested with the blinds shut and, for once, shut myself off versus the previous 15 years where I had been in corporate HR, recruiter at Dow Jones and Bank of America, career advisor at Yale University, owner of career coaching and resume writing business with 100+ executive clients, freelance recruiter...and the migraines cleared up on their own.

The digestive issues I had a few months ago I resolved by simply eating healthier (vegetarian 80% of the time - fresh fruits and vegetables - homemade salads & salad dressing, smoothies, oatmeal w/ flaxseed, quinoa & mixed nuts & 64+ oz of water a day + herbal tea), moving my body more, being outside in nature for at least 60 minutes a day every day and utilizing a stool to squat to eliminate versus calling my GP for a prescription or "referral to a gastroenterologist".

The severe sinus congestion that Ive had all this week where I refused to take Mucinex or Sudafed and, similar to the above issues, when I woke up today in the middle of the night because I literally was having difficulty breathing laying down, very similarly to the migraines and digestive issues, the sinus congestion issue is due to environment (24/7 indoor heat during the winter + extreme humidity of 75% to 90% despite it being winter with freezing temperatures below 32 degrees + dry air) and excessive stress (mind body imbalance) and, once again, the solution isnt OTC medication, antibiotics, nasal irrigation, OTC nasal spray or ENT surgery, the solution, as is the case 90%+ of the time, is natural remedies (vitamin C - fresh lemons + oranges; ginger + turmeric + honey + peppermint tea; apple cider vinegar + water + lemon; essential oils in diffuser; grapefuit seed extract; herbal tea facial steams).

Since physical and mental maladies and diseases are almost always rooted in a mind body imbalance, along with the natural herbal/plant/essential oil remedies, inner self healing is also key (self reiki, sound bath healing, breathwork, regulating nervous system & parasympthetic nervous system - PSNS, yoga, mhz audio, shadow work, somatic work, journaling, meditation, self reflection, introspection, movement, creative expression, stretching), healing in nature (being outside in natural sunlight, fresh air, trees, grass, streams every day) and healing with food (eating fresh fruit & vegetables 80%+ of the time, 64+ oz of water a day, eliminate processed and prepackaged snacks, minimize meat/dairy/alcohol/juice/soda/coffee/sugar/sodium/fat/caffeine/additives/preservatives/artifical flavors/toxins/synthetic chemicals/GMOs/pesticides).

Its also about doing inner work, addressing the mind body imbalances and aligning your mind, body, soul, heart and spirit.

Exactly what the Western medicine industrial complex, capitalism and corporate America never want you to do because once you do, you will self-actualize, and youll see all of the Wests bullshit for exactly what it is.

#ghost in the machine #late stage capitalism #anti capitalism #medical industrial complex #big pharma #pharmaceutical industry #mind body soul #mind body connection #free your mind #corporate slave #corporatism #holisticliving #ego death #self actualization #self awakening #ascension #third eye open #kundaliniawakening #esoteric #self healing #heal yourself #natural remedies #homeopathy #nature #essential oils #breathwork #nervous system #vasovagal syncope #reiki #meditation

[seldomscilence16]

Whumptober day 15: Emotional Damage

Fandom: Rise of the Brave Tangled Dragons

Prompts;

Lies

New scars

Breathing through the pain

Alrighty, so this comes from someone who has not read any of the books, and whos head cannons for angst just scream over anything else. Also... like ignore every timeline ever and history has no place here.

Jacks been around awhile. Not as long as other spirits obviously, but far longer than any 14 year old would or should expect to live. And he certainly never asked for it, but its not like Jack ever got much say in his life.

The point of the matter was, he's been around awhile. Hanging out mostly with the Winds, and doing what was expected of him by the other winter spirits. And of course number one, never being seen... because why would anyone see him right?

Which he supposes is really where his point lays, that hes old and hasnt been seen in a verrry long time and yet here he is, in a situation that is making his brain go in loops, as a dragon growls at him. Now, he knows thay random magical things exist- he is one after all- but having one see him and looking very aggresive is a whole other thing. He's had to deal with a lot of angry magical beings thank you, a dragon is not one he'd like to add to the list.

"Whoa there Toothless, whats got you so angry bud?"

"He is far from toothless." Jack knows he cant be heard but the situation makes him nervous.

But this kid also gives him the perfect distraction, as the dragon- Toothless- turns his head just slightly. Jack is able to kick his staff up and with a quick call to the breeze, hes landing on a rock and out of reach. He can get a better look now, see the prosthetics on both the dragon and boy, how the two interact, how stressed the boy seems.

He frowns a bit before creating a snow flake and spinning it between his fingers a bit. Berk is used to snow, so this shouldnt be too out of the ordinary- not that Jack cares really- and sends the flake down. He watches for a bit, the goofy smile and the silly game that includes fish and drawing in the dirt. He smiles a bit, before it falls as the winds inform him of where hes needed.

As Jack flies off, to bring a cold front across Scotland, he fails to notice the green eyes that follow him.

...

He has an eventful week.

Meeting a dragon, helping 3 michevious triplets prank their sister, and made it snow inside a hidden tower.

It was a nice week, compared to others since his awakening or whatever. But he also didnt necessarily do his 'job' as well as he could have over that week. And was therefore being summoned by Winter itself.

Hes somewhere between Scotland and Germany. Some thick forest slowly being covered in snow, and a bunch of winter spirits lurking about. It puts him on edge, not that he'd let any of them know, but he continues to the meeting place anyway. This is the way things have always been done, there are rules and those that dont follow them...

Jack is a spirit of winter, so he has to follow these rule, even if they seem to become more abundant and stricter every time. Even if he doesnt see the others following those rules. Even if hes scared to (second) death every time hes summoned.

Winter stands in all their glory, he wears a long fluffy blue robe that almost seems to clash with his orangish skin. But Jack wouldnt be mentioning it again, not after the first time, when he couldnt do anything for a full season, trapped by Winters side the whole time.

He stops a few feet away, feeling almost naked without his staff- hidden somewhere safe, guarded by the winds- he curls his hands into his cloak to hide how they tremble.

"Lord Winter, you summoned?" The words feel wrong in his mouth.

"The cold front, if you could even call it cold, has delayed our first frost by weeks! What have you been doing thats more important than your job!" His voice always leaves a ringing in Jacks ears, the way it roars across the landscape for only spirits to hear, and mortals to feel like a wave.

"The winds brought what you sent, I I did my best to s-" he flinches back as Winter steps forward.

"You have a job as a spirit of winter, Frost. And instead of doing the work I assigned you, you mess around and throw the seasons out of balance. The blame lays on your shoulders boy, and you have to be punished for it. To appease the Mother. You understand dont you?"

The solomn look they give as they step ever closer, a familar blade appearing in their hand, has fear rising to clutch at Jacks heart. He was told it gets easier, but he fears it all the same, for it hasnt yet. His skin crawls as the lord stands behind him, bodies flush in a way he hates, places the knife in his weak grasp and wraps their own around Jacks smaller, paler hand.

Jack tries not to remember what happens next.

...

He takes deep even breaths as he staggers his way towards his staffs hiding place. The winds try their best to keep him upright, but he still feels ready to topple any minute.

The wounds already start to seal themselves, the power of a season lord, but the drain of them, the pain, still lingers. Absently he picks at scars, new and old, on his arms, staring blankly ahead as he tried to focus on breathing through every wave of pain his steps bring.

When he hears the crack of something in the distance he can only groan in grim acceptance of more punishment. The other spirits always get mad when he fails, says it fails them all, and that they must share their punishment with him too. He thought the stones would have been enough, but maybe he should stop thinking.

He leans against the nearest tree, awaiting the first spirits presence, but instead sees a familar dragon bounding closer. He curls into himself, eyes closed in the hopes of staving off the oncoming pain. Instead he feels a huff of hot breath but nothing else, opens his eyes to meet those of the Nightfury.

"Toothless, where'd you go bud?"

"Are ye sure ya trained dhe dragon?"

"You dont think he found any ruffians or thugs right?"

Three familair voices filter past the trees, and he wonders how his week of visits found eachother. The girl stuck in a doorless tower, the Princess under tight watch, and the Chiefs dragon riding son, it was definetely an interesting bunch.

As the three make it into the clearing, Jack isnt expecting much, hes glad its not spirits, but Toothless has yet to take his eyes off him.

"Alright my toothy watcher, your friends are here, and I got places to be far from here." Before Winter changed their mind and decided he needed to be held for another season.

"Oh my gods he is real."

Jack freezes, eyes roving over to the three mortals who stare right back. Not at the tree, not at the dragon, at Jack. They couldnt see him before, no one could except Toothless- and maybe the chamelion, Jack couldnt tell for sure though- so why could they see him now??

"Its really Jack Frost." The blonde breathes, a... frying pan(?) in her grasp.

She said his name...

"Jack Frost is real?" The red head mumbles with wide eyes.

He looks back to the dragon,

"They just said my name." Toothless nods, grinning at him without teeth- and now the name makes sense.

"I cant believe this." The viking runs his hands through his hair in disbelief.

"You literally ride a dragon." Jack comments dryly, pushing off the tree and wincing with a hiss of breath.

"You're hurt!" The blondes exclamation draws the others attention.

"Yer a spirit, howdidya get hurt??"

"Its nothing, I uh... messed up."

"Its not nothing! Let me see!"

"Thanks blondey, but its nothing new. Im more concerned that you guys can see me now and I have no idea how."

He starts making his way towards his original goal again, he was almost there, and with the wind on one side and Toothless on the other its easier than before, even with eyes on him.

"Well Toothless likes you, so I guess thats gotta be a good sign."

"Sure changed his tune from last time." Jack agrees, the wind blowing his staff into his hand.

"How... how long have you been bringing winter to Berk?" Viking asks

"Far longer than your lifetimes. Which is why I know I'll be fine."

"So wha yer sayin, is this happen'd before."

He narrows his eyes at the scot,

"Lord Winter is in charge under Mother Nature herself. Our mistakes effect the turning of the seasons, mistakes we cant afford."

"Well it sounds like hes putting everything on you. Its not like youre the only one in charge of winter." Viking points out.

"Shh!" Jack looks around, the winds quiet and still, setting him on edge, "hes coming, you guys gotta go!"

"What why?" Blonde looks around frantically, pan held up in defense.

Before he can respond, a wind lingering between hot and cold, blows through them, knocking the three mortals back. Jack is quick to form a wall of ice between them and the oncoming spirit made wind. Lord Winter in their orange glory is sweeping through the trees, and to put mortals in obvious peril like this, Jack doesnt understand.

"You talk as if they hear boy. You are just a winter spirit, nothing more. I think you need another lesson in that."

His injuries burn at the threat, cuts and stabs and bruises alike. Still he prepares himself, he will protect the mortals who are here because of him, even if he perishes and becomes one with the snow.

Hes not expecting the three mortals to come to his side, the dragon readying a fire in his throat as the humans draw their weapons. From their searching gazes he can tell they cant see the actual Lord, but their presence at least effects the nature around them, giving a general target that may or may not have harm brought to it by mortal means.

Hes not ready for a fight by any means but he'll protect them.

So a wall of green coming between the groups is the last thing he expects.

"A mere Miser minion growing too fond of the seasons I see." A voice smooth and sweet but underlyed with power. "Tormenting a dear child of winter, three fated mortals and a child of the sky. This will be no longer."

"Uh whats going on?" Viking whispers to him, staring at the wall of nature.

"Um... I think Mother Nature is mad?" Jack whispers back.

"Youre lies will no longer infect my seasons minion." The wall recedes and the 'Lord' is gone. "And you five, I believe I owe you all an apology."

A woman of beauty emerges from the scenery itself, regal and powerful and full of all of natures beauty.

"Let them haunt you no more young Frost. Im sure your new friends will turn your fate yet." Leaves fall from the trees, brushing over his company as a wave of warmth hits him. His pain bleeds away, though his scars remain, "have fun with your new friends Jack, and be well. Until next time."

She fades away, and when he looks back to the mortals he finds gaping mouths.

"I have to draw her."

"My dads never gonna believe any of this."

"Why is it always fate?"

#whumptober2022 #no.15 #scars #lies #rise of the brave tangled dragons #fic #manipulation #angst #mentions of death #basically child abuse #jack frost angst #this could have been better but I ran out of time.... #mother nature gave them the sight

[the-wee-woo-royal]

Love Is...

This is for @renegades-ship-weeks week 4 / Macker - Coming out

Its late but we're just gonna ignore that and celebrate that I WROTE SOMETHING! AND ITS NOT DEPRESSING!!! WOOO

May the gay be good <3

Tagging (dm or comment to be added/removed): @obsidianfr3sk @greenalmond @galaxy-creationz @healing-winston-pratt

He’d been surrounded by gay people his whole life. 

It was as natural to him as seeing a straight relationship. 

Back in the glass room Max called home for 10 years, it's no surprise he’d people-watch.

He’d watch how comfortable everyone seemed to be with expressing themselves. 

He’d watch the confidence with every move, the words never stuttered.

And in the face of deep hatred, not a trace of fear.  

It may have been that the only LGBTQ+ people he knew then were the most confident beings alive, being his dads, all of Team Sketch, and one of his caretakers.

Or maybe it’s something that came with time. 

Was 17 years not enough time?

He just couldn’t understand why he was different. He knew he was gay when he discovered what love really was, it was never girls. Ever. He was a Renegade. An Everhart-Westwood. Confident with almost everything he does.

Everything except admitting he was gay.

Max owned it to himself and himself only. Yeah, he saw a hot dude (one in particular) and was reminded why he was very not straight. 

But even to his family, who he was close with and knew would accept him. They werent homophobic at all and the big fact that his dads were also gay.

There was no reason not to at least let people, especially his family, know. Max hated the “girlfriend” assumptions. 

All he needed to say was two words to stop them. 

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May 24th - Max: age 17

Many talked about love as something obtained, like a toy that can be played with wherever then forgotten and deserted just as fast. Not as something that was to be respected. 

Those people didn’t appreciate love for what it really was. 

It was different for everyone, but when the heart truly sets its course… you just know.

To Max, love is showing his new and improved glass city to one of his best friends, letting them marvel at his (and Adrian’s) work. 

Love is finally eating a family dinner his Dad’s had made. Not anything special. Just togetherness. 

Love is seeing the flag so despised, celebrated, cherished and loved by a mass of people. 

Love is the boy he’d seen as a friend, then become more in his heart just by existing. 

Jade Tucker

His silliness and carefree attitude was often seen as trouble, but to Max it was that exact fire he’d grown to love. 

Just thinking about him made Max smile at random. With every passing day those thoughts became more and more frequent. Until he couldn’t put it off anymore. 

He had a crushed on Jade Tucker

‘Loved’ right now was possibly a little far-fetched… but not by a lot. 

This time… Max was going to do something about it. He knew deep inside that this crush was worth chasing. 

So he did. 

It's been 4 months since he and Jade made it official. Very few friends knew. Jade was very PDA orientated but respected Max’s wish to keep it to a low place with many people. It's not like Max didn't want to but he was constantly being watched and didn’t want the secret to spill before he had a chance to tell people himself. 

Even then, the want to scream it from the top of the Renegade Tower was growing everyday. But his own self-consciousness kept him back.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

May 30th 

Everyone talks about how their ‘coming out’ talk ended, either in good spirit or bad.

No one ever tells the part on how to start the conversation. 

How do you even bring it up?

“I’m gay and am dating one of my best friends!” seems real tempting, but doesnt seem the best outright. 

Max thought about this for six days, what he’d say and advice on how to properly ask someone out, yet standing right beside the doorway of his dad’s office, he couldn’t recall one thing.

He’d gone in confident, but one he saw the door already open he just passed it and rested on the wall beside. 

Part of his plan was knocking. Now that he couldn’t, the rest of his plan just went poof your on your own!

And he couldn’t pass it again to leave otherwise one of them would see and know something was up. 

“I’m gay and am dating one of my best friends!” Was really tempting. 

He was just gonna wing it. 

Max took a breath and entered the doorway. 

The home office was a large room, since it was shared between both councilmen. Adrian once said that they used to have their own offices in the smaller rooms downstairs but they often needed each other’s opinion or double-approval and this room was closer to the rest of their common living space. Made them feel closer to the kids. 

But deep down both brother’s knew they just missed each other throughout the workday and would find any excuse to linger around the other at home. 

Love is missing the sight and presence of your partner, even just a door down. 

He didn’t linger for long before his dad, Hugh, asked him what he needed. Not in a mean ask so you can leave and I can work away, unlike a lot of other parents he’d seen, neither of them were like that. It was simply asking so I can help you, as my child, in any way I can. 

Max felt like he wanted to cry. Not out of sadness or fear. It was all overwhelming to him. 

Nothing was going to plan.

“I.. umm… kinda need to- well? No, I want…. To tell you something… important.” He’d tried to say it with confidence like on TV, but it came out shaky and the urge to cry was choking him up.

It had caught the attention of his Pops, Simon, who started to look worried. His Dad nodded and gestured to him to take a seat on one of the chairs in front of him. Pops stood and pulled the chair from his desk over, next to him as he sat. 

He looked at both his dads who are studying him, waiting for him to talk. Max knew they knew he was scared shit-less. They wouldn’t press or tell him to spit it out. 

Max stared at his hands in his lap, shaking, “Well, uhhhh-” his brain was failing and he could feel his eyes watering, “I just- umm, I-” his throat was closing and the tears started to flow. 

He sniffed a few times and that caused his parents to go into dad-mode. 

Pops put an arm around him, pulling him close and used his other hand to cover Max’s, trying to stop the shaking. Placing a kiss on his head, he tried to comfort him, “Hey, hey, It's ok… ok? Take your time, love. We aren’t going anywhere.” 

Dad had moved from the other side of the desk to kneel in front of him. With one hand resting on his and Pops, he reached the other to cup his cheek, wiping the falling tears. Dad tilted Max’s head up just a bit to make eye contact, “You are my son. I love you, we both love you. Nothing you say will ever change that.” There was a slight smile on his lips, “You could decide to become a bum living in our basement forever or even convert to Anarchism, annf still nothing will change that.”

Simon piped up with a snort, “wait a second, Anarchism… maybe. As long as you have a cool name and costume. We raised you to have taste. Now living in our basement forever?? Sorry but your dad and I want some nice alone time when we retire.” He clicked his tongue, “But even then yeah… I guess I'd still love you with everything in my heart. But you’d be on thin ice.” He finished with faux irritation and grumbling that made Max laugh and wonder why he’d been so scared in the first place. If anyone could cut tension, it was his Pops.

Ah fuck it. It was the first thought for a reason.

“I’m gay and am dating one of my best friends!” He didn’t know where the sudden confidence came from. But there wasn’t a stutter or waiver of his voice that hinted to any unease.

Both his parents were stunned for a moment before Pop’s sent Dad a quick cocky smile, a silent message. A taunt.

At that moment Max was sure that this… was hardly a surprise. 

Pops squeezed his shoulder, “That was very brave of you. I'm glad you felt you could tell us.” 

Max wiped the last few remaining tears, “You knew, didn’t you?” 

“Kind of, one can never be too sure on someone else’s sexuality. Your Dad, however, has an awful gaydar.”

Dad snorted, standing, “Lapse of judgment,” he smiled slyly, leaning against his desk, “so… dating and boys?”

The blood rushed to Max’s face, lighting his face of fire, “Stop there. Just… no.” 

“Do you need help?! I have many cute date ideas for you and Jade. ” Pops looked and sounded very happy at the mere beginnings of his son’s budding romance, which was good, in a way. It was a bit surprising that Pops knew it was Jade, but then again it was Pops. 

He knew all. 

“NO!” Max answered quickly. The last he needed was his parents involved in his love life. Dad was dense and straight-forward and Pops could be a little much sometimes. 

It fit their relationship dynamic, but Max was more on the lowkey side of things. 

Pops deflated, “Ok… but I'm here if you need any advice.”

Dad rolled his eyes at Pops but nodded in agreement.

Well, Jade has talked about progressing their relationship after he told his Dad’s. Maybe more public dates. WIth his Dads now knowing, there was no need to hide much anymore. ANd confidence comes with practice. 

Max huffed, not believing he was asking this, “Actually, can we come with you to Pride in a few days. Tickets kinda sold out before we thought to buy them and well, you kinda run it and get in for free, so ....” 

Hugh snorted, “We don’t get in for free, we still pay and donate to every organization there.”

Max sighed, “That's a choice. You could get in for free, you just choose not to.”

Max put on his most charming smile as both his parents did what they do best.

Embarrassed him. 

“Simon! Do you hear this?!?!” His Dad reached a hand out to his husband, “Already taking advantage of his poor compassionate parents to impress a boy!! Like a leech!” 

Was it too late to put himself up for adoption… again?

Simon took the hand and theatrically fell into Hugh's chest, like he was dying, “ Oh, husband of mine, we are too kind and good and thoughtful…”

Out of anyone who would have found him in that river…. 

“And handsome and generous not too.  He wants to seem cool and hip to his boyfriend!! Little does he know that it's us! WE are the cool ones!” 

Or even better! Let him drown. Anything was better than this. 

Hugh nodded like he heard the wisest, mind blowing thing ever, “And we will never get the credit, will we.” 

Pops shook his head solemnly.

Max groaned and buried his face in his hands, “Is that a yes?”

Hugh nodded with a big smile as Pops laughed, ruffling Max’s hair. 

Max stood to leave but was interrupted by his Dad, “Hey, Max?”

He turned back around and met his eyes, “We’re proud of you, you know.”

His heart burst in his chest at the words, an instant smile forming on his face, “Thank You.”

His Dads shared a quick look, “There's no need for any ‘thanks’. It's our job, that we do with pride, to love you, in any and every situation,” Dad finished as Pops crossed the short distance and kissed him on his forehead, “Now, go kiss your boyfriend a lot and tell him that he won’t outdress me at Pride this year. I've stepped up my game.” 

Was that… possible. Dad was already very… out there. THERE'S MORE THAT CAN BE DONE?!

Max left the room in way better spirits than when he entered it. Nothing went to plan but that made it all the better. It was just his and his Dad’s raw emotion. 

He didn’t realize this before but it finally was clear. 

He didn’t need unbreakable confidence to be openly gay. All it really took was his feelings and a few people in his corner telling him to kiss his boyfriend. 

.

.

.

There will be a part 2 (dont ask when idk) of some Max and Jade time and to close up a few things I left hanging on purpose (small things but still). 

I hope you all liked it!!! I love everyone of you who read it.

Enjoy the rest of pride month and be proud!!

#renegades ship week 4 #rsw4 #renegades #renegades trilogy #marissa meyer #fanfic #my fanfic #max everhart-westwood #jade tucker #hugh everhart #simon westwood #captain chromium #dread warden #bandit #humon #royal writes #my post #love is... #macker

[ecoamerica]

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[beaopalmoon]

lordy, what a busy week. i’m covering kim’s shifts so i’ll have some overtime hours.

this new manager managed to push another employee’s buttons to the point that they quit. they’re the only other non-cis employee, and she made a stink about refusing to call them by their preferred name, so after that, the GM told me today that she’s going to talk to her, and if she doesn’t promise to change how she talks to and about us, she’s got to go.

i’ve known that the GM was going to talk to her on wednesday. i had to go in the store earlier for unrelated reasons, and the GM approached me to talk about all this. i told her that i would like to come in before the end of her shift so that i can hear what the details are, and she asked if i would like to talk to this new manager with her. considering we’ve only spoken once, and it was all about the job, i said yes.

i’m very willing to try to talk reason in to someone that has a bigoted perspective if they’re at least willing to be civil, because i know that people like this only care about minority groups if someone in their social circle is of a particular demographic. that this lady wants to burn bridges immediately is concerning, but i would rather give her a chance to change before i demand that we not work on the same shifts or threaten to quit.

i’m not a confrontational person at all. i’m not one to immediately label someone that could be ignorant or ill informed an *ist or a *phobe until they’re presented with facts and continue to behave poorly.

my situation is an abnormal one too, but i hope that it gives this manager the perspective to better understand anyone that doesnt conform to cisgender expectations. because i’m intersex, i have physical and psychological sex ambiguity that has motivated me to pursue transitioning for my health and safety, and for some cis people, that makes sense, and has the possibility to open them up to the idea of not making assumptions about other trans ppl.

sooo tomorrow will be Interesting.

THAT SAID... there are a few coworkers i have that still slip up when referring to me. they nearly always correct themselves, and now that my voice has started dropping, its less frequent. i’m okay with that because they always call me Gregg, and though they knew my legal name, they have since forgotten it.

all the same, they’ve been extremely kind and supportive of me through this.

i had considered asking a few ppl that i got along with well what they thought about me and trans people in general, but i definitely dont have to worry about that now. if this manager has done one good thing, her bullshit has given me complete trust in the staff.

i even feel more comfortable talking to my parents about this now. they’ve been worried about me as i came out and started taking testosterone, but they have never been rude about it. now, because i’ve told them about this clown and how she’s negatively impacting people, i have had the chance to explain to them that i am no less their daughter, i’m just also their son too.

they never made me feel like i couldn’t do what i wanted to because of my sex, i was allowed to express myself however i wanted as i grew up, but my mom was concerned that she would be made to feel bad if she talked about how or who i was when i was a child by upsetting me with the name or pronouns i used to have.

i got to reassure her that i’m still her child. telling her that if anything, i would compare my feelings on my gender to how the native americans had two-spirit people. because of her heritage, she seemed most comforted by that idea, and otherwise lamented that it was a shame that i felt that i have to present strictly as a man to feel safe, and not just be allowed to exist as i naturally am. i completely agree! i think anyone that may relate to me should not be harassed and shoe-horned in to one presentation or the other!

however, i do still take testosterone for my health, because estrogen/progesterone actively make me feel ill and i do need some manner of hormone supplement in order to function. so the longer i am on this medication, the more i will appear and present as masculine.

it’s been a huge relief to be able to say all this to my parents and have them not feel as much like i’m pressuring them to get me. instead they feel like i’m giving context to why this issue at work is taking more of my free time, and that i am fully comfortable talking about what’s on my mind and what’s going on in my life with them.

AND i have therapy and an appointment with my gender health specialist next week, so there’s gonna be SO MUCH to talk about!!

#bap

[livecharliereaction]

Ill probably make charumiq2 for next ep for easier navigation for meeee But yeah thats done now thats um aaahahahha

- bernkastel showed up i am so happy. YAY! So many mentions of this lambdadelta i kind of thought shed be satoko somehow but im not seeing it rn well see when she shows up

- i rly hope the witches wont stay as only ????? characters n get weaved into the main story but guess what im like 100% sure thatll happen at least somehow but i dont know how. Miss bern said shed help me YAYYY! So nice of her

- i can rly see what ppl mean when they say it starts slow though it wasnt a problem for me bcs i liked the characters in the family already but i can totally see it being a problem for someone else Bcs like i knew theres witches. So theres the whole "ooh u think itll be a regular murder mystery but its fantasy" "is there a 19th person ooh" Well that just doesnt happen at all. However smth ive been noticing about wtc that although theres always secrets and thus always reveals theres SO MANY mysteries that the story doesnt rly lose THAT much if u know smth (But its still important to me that i get to know things in the order the author wants me to like in general so spoilers r still being crazy avoided...)

- i had the theory that beatrice was very young when kinzo met her and was traumatized by his "love" and then died and her spirit is sort of haunting the mansion but its not entirely clicking what that would be so im ditching it for now

- i know tea party and ????? cant be taken tooooooooo seriously but theyre the main reason i dont think that anymore See Im kind of doubting the existence of a human beatrice altogether. Sure bernkastel was kinda rikaing around but it seems too complicated to compare it to that so no way

- I still cant forget lambdadelta sharing some resemblance to satoko (from the shit that i saw BEFORE i was avoiding spoilers Im talking very very slight like rly just hair n eye color) but i feel like we wont see her in the next ep at all. Im imagining (hoping) each ep might have a new witch in it. I cant imagine the gold thing going all the way through 8 eps so... (Bcos What riddle takes that long.)

- Favs r still maria and natsuhi from the human side at least Like that didnt change. And i doubt it would I also like jessica a lot i do

- motherhood goes crazy Natsuhi and Jessica i could die and also marias lack of motherly love rips me apart

- Im very curious about the physics of this though or i mean like What now? Are we going back in time? If so how much????? Im kinda imagining its just kinda similar all over again but with different sacrifices each time but the ways that can be done r hmm. Someone else might try to do as the epitaph says and thus killing people but yeah.

- Not to be battler but if ep1 were to actually be a humans doing itd be maria (u know) natsuhi (absolutely not sorry for even saying it queen but she was running around w the rifle and all and had a lot of control over some situations) or kinzo (its easiest to believe that corpse wasnt really Him out of the corpses The toe thing isnt convincing to me but theres the problem of Ok whose body is it charlie? and i wouldnt know)

- Excited and baffled it was 12 hrs i feel like i started it what maybe this week idfk School starts again so i have to slow down the pace but thats ok...

- I thought the role of "the witchs messenger" might change too but i kind of hope its just marias job each time i liked the way she did it shes so fun

- no clue abt the rules of this world yet but im excited bcs theyre spelling it out to Think about it so u know it wont be obvious I dont even think i Can make a good guess rn

- natsuhi save me

#charumi1

[chrysanthemumpink]

I'm starting to feel like it doesn't really matter. It never matters. It's the same when we're fighting and the same when we're good.

I feel like I'm always alone, like I have no friends, and begging for anyone to talk to me. Which is crazy way for someone in a relationship to feel

Sidenote, once you're older than 25, it gets very difficult to make friends. It's almost like the world pushes for you to have the closest and most intimate relationship with your partner. And that you almost have to prioritize the romantic relationship over any other kinds of connections. So what ends up happening is that it's difficult to make friends with people because they have different priorities while most social events assume that you are with someone else...most likely a boo. Ironically, it's much easier to find a romantic or sexual partner than it is a long-term friendship

But back to me. I know I moved up here alone. I knew I would've have anyone when I got here. When I moved, I understood that there'd be no one there to just chat. Not even when I desperately needed it.

And I just wish that he would call me every day or every other day. Even more so, I wish he could see just how much I need that from him. I mean...I don't have anyone. Even though I'm in this relationship, I don't have anyone.

And honestly, I'm getting tired of feeling that way. Part of me thinks that I don't have too. It's a long shot but I can find someone else, right? Someone that won't make me feel like I'm alone, even when they are in the room.

Off topic, but I grew up heavily religious. I'm still a very spiritual person though I'm far from a fundamentalist. And it's been difficult lately...very difficult. I've struggled with mental health for a long time but it's getting to the point where I don't see myself making it to 30. I'm 27 & truthfully, 28 doesn't seem guaranteed. He doesnt know that. But if he ever, idk, considered that maybe theres a reason I ask for certain things, he would. And that maybe there's a reason I really struggle with the way he just doesn't seem to really care whether I exist or not.

Anyway, I've been fasting for a week now. Might as well try the spiritual route because not much else is working. He does not care much about the fast either but for a moment this isn't about him. I feel alone. And like there's nothing connecting me to the world. Frankly, the world doesn't seem too interested in connecting with me. Quite the opposite. So I did this fast to ask myself the following: "Can my spirit and will sustain me when the external world can't or just doesn't want too."

(On the flip side, that's also one of the reasons I try not to push too hard for affection. He can never know the truth. I would never do something like that to him.)

Idk, I figured fasting from external sustenance would ignite some version of internal sustenance. The first 3 days were 18 hours. These last 2 days have been 24 hour fasts. It was actually much more difficult than I thought it would be. I had no idea that *not eating* can cause vomiting.

But the fast is over in 2 hours. I did it. I managed to rely fully on my spirituality and my own self. And now, he just looks so small in comparison. My disappointment in his lack of effort far outweighs any of the appreciation I have for the effort that does exist.

And I know I'm being harsh. He's not in the states right now. He has an app just to talk to me. He's busy and he wouldn't respond to anything if he didn't care. I tell him to send me pictures and he does. But...it's so unsatisfying. 2 messages a day at most. None of it is a conversation. I know he gets off at 9 and it'd be nice if he would call...at 9. Instead of a message, the a reply, that may or may not be answered. I'm not saying he doesn't have a reason to not be putting in effort. I just think it's a fairly reasonable for a partner to want/*need* a conversation every day when the other partner is literally in a foreign country. my issues aside, the least a partner can do is say they're still alive and how it's going.

I do see his point of view so I'll give it one last chance. When he comes back, I can try to make it work again. And I won't even tell him, lord knows he's too busy to deal with it. I'll just keep it to myself how much I don't want to deal with it anymore. And maybe he'll prove me wrong.

But right now, Ive become more assured in the things that will see me through whatever life lies ahead of me. And I see how little concern or difference our lives effect one another. And well, I just can't afford the feelings he inspires and I can't help but fantasize about what it'd be like to do something crazy like hug 8 times a day

#leo x pisces

[ouchiis]

hc that if ouye gets killed under any circumstances, he falls into a temporary coma to heal and he wakes up anywhere from a few hours to a few weeks depending on the severity. in this time, he's temporarily bound to the underworld and allowed to talk with the spirits there to pass the time. sometimes izanami will pay him a visit just to make sure he isn't gaining the mental fortitude to cause yet another revolution. when he fully recovers, he wakes up poorly rested, usually with a headache similar to a hangover. he can vaguely recall his trips to the underworld, but admittedly they feel like dreams and can easily slip through his memory if he doesnt write them down in his dream journal for example. his brother typically monitors him as he recovers from his death; if they die at the same time, their souls would fuse together again when they meet in the underworld, thus ending their existence and forcing them to remain permanently dead.

#❛⠀₊˚ ☾ ?⠀ la maison dieu ( headcanons ) ⠀❜ ⠀ꜜ ⠀. #❛⠀₊˚ ☾ ?⠀ tarot de marseilles ( ooc ) ⠀❜ ⠀ꜜ ⠀. #this is messy but buh

[hetamata]

re: last post i was actually gonna talk about a half baked idea for a comic (thinking 6 to 12 parts) that i will most certainly never get around to making that features that oc i posted earlier this week

but basically in the turn of the first millennium, the earth cracks open to reveal a seemingly endless dungeon, filled with strange creatures and magical artifacts and texts, spurring a technological-magical revolution and societal upheaval.

Two hundred years later, a man enters the dungeon and dies a few weeks later. he is resurrected and told that he will find what he needs at the end of the dungeon. however, while slowed down, his body continues to rot away, and with it, his memories.

story starts when he's just realized that he can't remember his name (having gone down into the dungeon by himself, and therefore hadn't talked to anyone else for a while) so he starts verbally repeating what he remembers of his own life story, though it gets distorted over iterations.

there's a plague ravaging the outside world, and he's here to find a cure or some kind of treatment in the dungeon. his daughter caught the plague, and he's here on a last ditch effort to save her, he thinks. but really, if he was looking for a cure, especially on a time limit, wouldn't it make more sense to try harder aboveground? then at least he'd be able to be with his family. is he sure that he's not just here to hide away from his problems?

he's pretty sure that he was just some common soldier, though he is awfully good at using these weapons he just picked up, so what if he was some kind of knight or someone with more advanced training? In which case, it makes very little sense that he would be living with his wife and daughter out in some small town. Hell, does he really have a wife and daughter, or did he just make them up?

finally, who was the person who resurrected him? he doesnt know how long he was dead, but it seems unlikely that someone would just stumble upon his cooling corpse by accident so quickly. were they traveling with him originally? were they a friend? but if so, why would they curse him to become a shambling monster for all of eternity? was this even within mortal ability- were they some kind of demon or god?

and the story ends with him kinda giving up after traversing the dungeon for like 400 years and lying down for like 100 years and a group of traveling adventurers (whose job is explicitly to find dead bodies and either bury them or bring them to the surface to give their families closure) find him and release his spirit so that he can finally move on.

as a last note i did say at the turn of the first millennium and general technology-wise i am aiming for 1200s-ish at the beginning of the story and 1500s-ish at the end but i cannot decide if itd be funnier if christianity explicitly existed or not. alternate universe pope sylvester ii fighting for his life tryna make the existence of magic coherent with medieval christian dogma.

#pot.txt