#source: hellsing ultimate abridged
Dante: Go with Mommy, V. Daddy’s got work to do.
V: Am I your child in this scenario?
Dante: V, our group relationship could be best described as tags on pornhub, NOW Go.
V: Fine, dad
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Godwoken: Our group relationship can be best summarized as tags on pornhub
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Abridged!Alucard: Okay, here are the ground rules-
Abridged!Alucard: You can punch me, kick me, pull my hair,
Abridged!Alucard: I am a-okay being stabbed, biting and scratching are on the table, you can use fire-
Abridged!Allison: These are the ground rules?! Is there anything off-limits?
Abridged!Alucard: Damn, bitch, you got something really sick you wanna do, huh? Oh, you little pervert. All right, surprise me. Ooh, this is gonna be fun!
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Ariel: Where’s Shiro?
Potimas: Oh, I killed her!
Ariel: Killed her?
Potimas: Cut off her bloody head!
Ariel: Oh, well, that’s step one.
Ariel: What about two through ten?
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Jack: What did you do?
Phryne: Okay, I will tell you but you can’t be mad at me.
Jack: What. Did. You. Do?
Phryne: Well, I was minding my own business-
Phryne: I was!
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Ironwood: Fear not, people of Mantle. For I am here to save you!
Citizen: Hooray! It's the Atlas Military!
Ironwood: FROM YOURSELVES!
Citizen: Oh god! It's the Atlas Military!
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Muzan x reader incorrect quote
Muzan: So I was just sitting there, minding my own business.
Been wanting to write for full length stuff so feel free to request ^(＾ｖ＾)^
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Spandam: CUTTY FLAM?! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE?!
Lucci: I'm sorry Spandam, I tried to stop him but when I did he merely responded with, and I quote- "Fuck the marines". He then proceeded to tilt every painting he passed on the way here
Franky: *maniacally laughing*
Spandam: *groaning* Walking through that hallway is going to give me such a headache now
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Bakugo: And I’d just… I’d j-just get so angry, every time I’d see a guy kiss another guy.
Todoroki: You think maybe you were angry because you couldn't be one of those guys? Because if you were, all your friends might think less of you?
Bakugo: Oh. Oh, shit.
Source: Hellsing Ultimate Abridged
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Erina: what did you do?
Souma: okay, I’ll tell you, but you can’t get mad at me
Erina: ... what did you do?
Souma: well, first, I was just minding my own business—
Souma: I was!
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Gyurie: So our only option is to hit that monstrosity from the air.
Ariel: Well, we do have one option. However, it was decommissioned-
Hyuvan: The Lockheed SR-71 Blackbird. An advanced long-range strategic reconnaissance aircraft capable of Mach 3 and an altitude of 85,000 feet.
Gyurie: You . . . sure do seem to know a lot about it.
Hyuvan: DO YOU EVEN READ MY CHRISTMAS LIST?!
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Gyurie: What. Did you do?
D: Alright. (beat) But you can't be mad at me.
Gyurie: What Did You Do?
D: Okay, first... I was minding my own business.
D: I waaas!
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Solidus: Now, now, before we start throwing around words like "betrayal" or "cock," let's let Ocelot explain himself!
Ocelot: I'm betraying you.
Solidus: Oh, you cock!
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Tyrande: I’m going to kill you!
Sylvanas, with the biggest smirk: See that would be intimidating if you were, well, intimidating.
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Shiho: What did you do?
Shinichi: Alright, but you can’t be mad at us.
Shiho: WHAT did you do?
Kaito: Well, first, We were minding our own businessー
Shiho: *Slams hand on table* BULLSHIT!
Shinichi and Kaito: WE WERE!!
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Hartro: What did you do?
Trexel: ...alright. But you can't be mad at me.
Hartro: WHAT. DID. YOU. DO.
Trexel: Okay, first, I was minding my own business-
Trexel: I was!
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Adam: Since you lost the title, and both of you have been beefing, we’ve had some… expensive claims.
Drew and Sheamus: Like what?
Adam: First off - property damage.
*Scene of Drew and Sheamus fighting backstage, breaking tables and hurting officials*
Drew: Good times.
Adam: Dozens of noise complaints.
Sheamus: *shouting to the sound of loud heavy metal* Sorry! I can’t hear yer!
Adam: Injuring at least a dozen innocent people.
Drew: Ach, so did Stone Cold, and he got intae teh Hall O’Fame!
Adam: And… all of the sexual talk during your matches, and you, Drew, sending unsolicited dick pics to Roman Reigns.
Sheamus and Drew: We ain’t apologizin’.
Adam: Listen, I know this is asking a lot, but…
Adam: I want you to keep yourselves locked in your rooms until Mr. McMahon has left.
Drew: …I get teh distinct impression yeh embarrassed of us.
Sheamus: We’re gonna go with no, fella.
Adam: This is important and I don’t need you causing another scene!
Drew: Fuck off! We’re goin’ fae a walk.
Adam: No, you don’t!
Sheamus: Oh, what are yer gonna do? Grab that guy who can stop us? What was his name? Michael McDoesn'texist?
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Black Heron:*Sees a Superarmored Bradford* ....well, at least I'll die with a WAP.
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The Narrator, during the real person ending: What did you do?
The Player: Okay, I’ll tell you, but you can’t get mad at me.
The Narrator: What. Did. You. Do.
The Player: Well first, I was minding my own business–
The Narrator, slamming his hand on the table: Bullshit!
The Player: I WAS!
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Lili: What did you do?
Bell: Alright, but you can't be mad at me.
Lili: What. Did. You. Do?
Bell: Okay, first, I was minding my own business...
Lili: [slams fist on table] BULLSHIT!
Bell: I WAAS!!
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