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#source: elementary
incorrectcaves · 2 days ago
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The Doctor: Before you say anything, I’d like to remind you that I am wearing the Demon Crown.
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dc-incorrect-bats · 6 days ago
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[Alfred is dressing his wounds]
Alfred: Some of this isn't blood. It's lipstick. Were you in a fight or were you having sex?
Bruce: The two aren't mutually exclusive.
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dc-incorrect-bats · 9 days ago
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[searching a crime scene]
Jason: Venom no doubt. This time delivered straight from the fangs of the deadly coastal taipan.
Dick: How can you tell?
Jason: There's one right behind your foot.
Dick: [freezing] What do I do?
Jason: [pulling his phone from his pocket] I'm going to look that up. I'd start with don't get bitten.
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smashing-quotes · 11 days ago
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Villager: Before you say anything, I’d like to remind you that I’m holding an axe.
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Snow: Before you say anything, I’d like to remind you that I’m holding an axe.
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Ferb: Before you say anything, I’d like to remind you that I’m holding an axe.
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dc-incorrect-bats · 18 days ago
Conversation
Tim: Do you have any idea what it's like to live with a man who constantly thinks he's the best?
Steph: Mm. Must be irritating.
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dc-incorrect-bats · 27 days ago
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Steph: [pointing at the police scanners] You've been glued to these for the last few days.
Tim: Slow week, at least in regards to murder and mayhem. Patrols haven't turned up anything.
Steph: Maybe some lunatic will throw his mother-in-law in the wood chipper, give you something to do today.
Tim: Fingers crossed
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dc-incorrect-bats · 27 days ago
Conversation
Dick: Any luck?
Damian: Luck is an offensive, abhorrent concept. The idea that there is a force in the universe tilting events in your favor or against it is ridiculous.
Dick: So that'd be a no.
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Shuu: Before you say anything, I’d like to remind you that I’m holding a cleaver.
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2linuxdz · a month ago
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Linux distributions that brings you the look of the macOS system with all icons and themes you need as a user.
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incorrect101dalmatians · a month ago
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Dolly: You’re being a snob.
Clarissa: Someone has to be.
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overheard-at-yuuei · a month ago
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Shinsou: Regarding those detentions, Sensei, I’d say you should be rewarding us instead. We’ve just exposed some gaping flaws in the school’s security system.
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Conversation
Doorlock Holmes (Daffy Duck): How was your date?
Dr. Watkins (Porky Pig): Goo-g-goo-goo-fine. I th-think maybe she lied to me. It was the end of the n-n-night and we were talking about whether or not we've been m-m-married and when she said she hadn't, and this isn't something I would have n-n-noticed before I started working with you, but I could swear she wasn't telling the t-t-t-truth.
Holmes: Flexing our deductive muthscles are we, I could burthst with pride!
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secretlifeoffangirls · 2 months ago
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Dan: I’m sorry I accused you of arson.
Maze: Well, I was the obvious suspect.
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drei-satzzeichen · 2 months ago
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Regarding those detentions, sir, I’d say you should be rewarding us instead. We’ve just exposed some gaping flaws in the school’s security system.
Justus, probably
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secretlifeoffangirls · 2 months ago
Conversation
Chloe: You’re being a snob.
Lucifer: Someone has to be.
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