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#source : brooklyn nine nine
incorrectcuphead · 1 year
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ms chalice: the only thing i’m not good at is modesty.
ms chalice: because i’m great at it.
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incorrectbatfam · 7 months
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Damian: Father is looking at us. Act natural.
Tim: Spreadsheet, spreadsheet.
Jason: Crime, crime.
Dick: Gotham, Gotham.
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Ahsoka: You don’t have a hairdryer in your ship?
Anakin: Have you never met a human before?
Ahsoka, on the phone with Obi-Wan: Master Obi-Wan, do you have a hairdryer in your ship?
Obi-Wan: Of course, I’m not an animal.
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sunflowersloth · 1 year
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wednesday: i’m actually deeply in love with enid and we’ve been dating for a couple months now, we even have pet names.
ajax: why are you telling me this??
wednesday: because no one will believe you.
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waterfire1848 · 2 years
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[ After the Batkids destroyed the manor. ]
Jason: Anyone else have the weird urge to lecture themselves?
Jason, as Bruce: Jason, what are you doing?
Bruce, appearing from behind Jason: Jason, what are you doing?
Jason: I conjured him.
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dwobbitfromtheshire · 5 months
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chaoticace2005 · 3 days
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Vox: You played me like a fiddle!
Alastor: Oh no, old friend. Fiddles are actually difficult to play. I played you like the cheap kazoo you are!
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underqualified-human · 8 months
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*Ace watching as Yuu and Grimm sort through an entire stove-sized box of Valentine's Day letters/gifts*
Ace: What do you do to them? Yuu: Fear is a powerful aphrodisiac.
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waltermis · 3 days
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Office
*Natasha walking pass Y/N*
Natasha: Hey Y/N, will you join me in Fury's office for a second?
Y/N *following Natasha*: Ohhh, private rendezvous huh? This whole 'trying to make a baby' thing has got you super freaky girl-
*Entering the office*
Y/N: Heeeyyy FuRY! *clears throat* What's up dude...!!
Fury: ...
Natasha: What did you think was happening??
Fury: She clearly thought you were gonna have secret sex in here...
Y/N: WHAt?! Inappropes much, Nick? *awkward chuckle*
Natasha: ...😏😏
Fury: Hey! Stop thinking of ideas!!
Natasha:
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incorrectskywalkers · 8 months
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[anakin, ahsoka and some clones are stood before a burning building after a mission went terribly]
Anakin: ...Anyone else have the weird urge to lecture themselves?
Anakin, imitating Obi-Wan: "Anakin, what are you doing?"
Obi-Wan, appearing from behind them: Anakin, what are you doing?
Anakin: I conjured him.
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incorrectcuphead · 2 years
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mugman: chalice, i am not helping you!
chalice: why not? is this because i once betrayed you?
mugman: yes! it was our last interaction!
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incorrectbatfam · 1 month
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Jason: Look, Tim, I’m not gonna waste your time with some lame excuse about why we left you behind, all right? Just the truth.
Jason: Dick and I were taken hostage by an Armenian biker gang and thrown on a cargo ship heading to Asia, but we’re back now. Don’t worry about it.
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incorrect-spiderverse · 9 months
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(After Miles, Gwen, Hobie, and Pavitr destroyed part of Pavitr's dimension.)
Hobie: "Anyone else have the weird urge to lecture themselves?"
Hobie, as Miguel: "Hobie, what are you doing?"
Miguel, appearing from behind Hobie: "Hobie, what are you doing?"
Hobie: "I conjured him."
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greghatecrimes · 3 months
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Recently I've been feeling a lot of Kutner love
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incorrectquotesmcu · 2 months
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Natasha: Remember how upset you got when Tony ended a text with “thx” instead of thanks?
Steve, visibly upset: Why would you bring that up?!
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