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#somewhat self-projecting
chamerionwrites · 10 months
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As a small-time Stellan Skarsgard's Acting enjoyer and big-time Morally Compromised Old Man enjoyer I was inevitably going to fall down a Luthen Rael rabbit hole at least once so forgive me for being fully on my bullshit. But I can't explain my read on this guy without talking about That Speech, and I can't talk about that speech without dumping a bunch of thoughts about dialogue.
Because in my own writing the thing I get most obsessive about is character voice, and the thing about character voice is that not everyone is a poet. Sometimes the craft of writing is about euphony pure and simple. But sometimes (revealing my biases) I think the craft of writing is being able to ask yourself - sure it's good, but is it true? Can you find the poetry in the everyday? Can you express something sharp and compelling and resonant and stay faithful to the perspective of a character who isn't consciously honing their words in that way? All fictional dialogue is constructed. But there does come a point on the spectrum of naturalistic to constructed dialogue - it's partly a matter of taste - where you see more of the writer patting themselves on the back for writing a banger of a line than you see of the character, and personally I often find this off-putting.
Which doesn't mean you never get to let the poetry off the leash (God, that would be joyless). It just means there's a time and a place.
Andor's writers are dropping a lot of bangers and they absolutely know it but largely it works for me, because they're smart about the time and place. Cassian gets to be a guy who's resourceful with his words when the chips are down - that's a big part of his characterization. Maarva and Nemik get to break out the poetry when giving a speech or writing a political manifesto; those words are crafted in-universe as well as out. And Luthen - a performer, a salesman, a man with constructed identities - he gets to use a lot of constructed speech even when he isn't in full-throttle soliloquy mode. I've said before that a lot of stories about espionage are also stories about storytelling: people who create characters, fictions, who tell lies in an attempt to get at truths. In this story Luthen is that guy. Wouldn't you rather give it all at once to something real than carve off useless pieces till there's nothing left - it doesn't matter how constructed that sounds if it's a sales pitch he's rehearsed. It doesn't matter if you see a little bit of the author or the actor peek through when he says things like I know the outside; I imagine the rest, because it functions as characterization when in some sense he is both those things.
All of which is to say That Speech works for me because it tells you something about Luthen beyond the face value of what he says. It tells you this is something he's THOUGHT about, at length. If he hasn't delivered those lines to a mirror, he has absolutely worked through some version of them in his head more than once. And that tells you something just slightly to the left of who Luthen objectively is - it tells you how he constructs and sees himself. I fully believe that Luthen believes what he's saying there.
I also fully believe that this is a man who self-admittedly has an ego and a desire for recognition, who says he's given that up but evidently hasn't let go of some measure of resentment about it. That here's a guy who put on a billowing black cloak, pulled out all the spy theatrics for the express purpose of unsettling his informant, and then gave his best space King Lear audition. That here's a guy with a soliloquy about his sacrifices locked and loaded. On some level Luthen is a little bit into being a martyr for the cause. He's a little bit into the dark glamor of being a lone wolf operator pulling morally tarnished strings. He's a little bit into frightening and manipulating his informant! For all the cynicism of what he's saying, he's a little bit enamored with his own self-image as the sort of man who says it, in a way that suggests an inner romantic more than an inner pragmatist. He says he's damned for what he does but there's more furious pride underlying it than self-loathing; in the same breath he's admitting that a tiny piece of him wants a parade.
Which is fascinating and a little unflattering and way more interesting than just a badass character delivering a badass monologue. The characterization here is partly that Luthen is the kind of guy who monologues.
And to give him his due - I also fully believe that he's a very driven and committed man who has sacrificed a lot. Seen in that light, in fact, I think some of his character flaws come into focus in highly sympathetic ways. Ultimately this is a guy with a deep sense of urgency - "terrified the Empire's power will grow beyond the point where we can do anything to stop it," as he says. And sometimes there can be a lot of ego in urgency. It is a special kind of crazy-making to feel you are taking a problem far more seriously than almost everyone around you. It is a weight of responsibility to believe it's on you to fix that problem before it becomes too big to solve. Under those circumstances it's very understandable that Luthen has big responsible student leading the group project energy and a touch of main character syndrome (which is interesting and sort funny, contrasted with Cassian spending much of the story desperately trying to avoid becoming a main character). It takes a certain kind of drive and audacity-verging-on-arrogance to accomplish what Luthen has accomplished. But character flaws are often the flip side of character strengths, and I think a lot of his are tied up here. Sometimes he's a little enamored with his own isolation (he could choose to be more open with fellow rebel leaders like Saw imo). Sometimes he's awfully comfortable instrumentalizing others while insulating himself. He says Imperial arrogance is remarkable, but sometimes he's blind in similar ways - Luthen is almost as surprised as the Imperials by the funeral riot in the final episode. He's spent so much time stage-managing his would-be rebellion from Coruscant that an organic uprising startles him. In his self-appointed position as the lonely string-puller at the top, he maybe has a bit too much fondness for control and not quite enough regard for community (imo it's also kind of telling that there are no actual Aldhanis involved in the heist on Aldhani). As Clem says - sometimes people don't look down the way they should.
All of which are very interesting and human flaws for him to have! And which I do think the show subtly gestures at in the sort of contemplative way he reacts to that riot, and which I'd love to see come into focus more in S2.
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phantomrev · 11 months
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Posting this to my profile just so people know a little more about my ninjago HC bc I like sharing stuff I like and bc I feel like sharing it
-Cole is trans, mlm & demisexual
-Kai is bi with a pref for fem presenting people and Gals, he also had a small crush on cole for a little but ultimately saw him as a friend
-Jay is pan and cis
-Nya is genderfluid- they really said "hey become fluid like water" and went full on with it and also had a small crush on cole until someone asked "hey do you wanna be with him or do you wanna be HIM" and something clicked... not to mention all the time Nya felt nice whenever someone used He/Him btw
-Zane is nonbinary (he/they/it) and doesn't have a preference
-Pixal is genderqueer and doesnt have any preferred pronouns but likes to only be called by name
-Lloyd is trans (he/him) and also Aroace but doesnt find out until after sons of garmadon
- garmadon and wu?? Allies and dont mind anything they love their skittle ninjas/ kid
Bonus:
-Morro is Nonbinary and masc presenting (they/them but dont mind he/him) also a preference for masc/guys
-Harumi and Vania are WLW. While Vania always knew, Harumi repressed it alot.
- Ronin is trans... thats it-
-Pythor is homophobic /j
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Alrighty screw it, here’s some neurodivergent & lgbtq+ headcanons of musical characters, as someone who’s both of those things
Disclaimer 1: Bigotry and dumbassery will not be tolerated.
Disclaimer 2: These are just my opinions, headcanons I made for fun. You don’t have to agree with them, and you’re free to have your own interpretations. Just be respectful.
• Enjolras is ace and on the aro spectrum. He’s never felt sexual attraction towards anyone, and he’s only ever been romantically attracted to Grantaire. (And France./j)
• Grantaire is gay, and very in love with Enjolras. I don’t think I need to explain any more than this, lol.
• Cosette is bi. She discovered this after realizing she had a small crush on Eponine as well as Marius.
• Marius is also bi.
• Eponine is ace demiromantic, and also nonbinary. (Specifically using she/they pronouns.) She could never understand how the people around them could fall in love so fast, and with people they hardly knew. She didn’t fall for Marius until they formed a close connection with him. Regarding gender, they’ve never felt like she wasn’t a girl, but they didn’t feel fully like one. She felt sort of like a girl, but also like something else. It took them a while to figure out what exactly it was because she never felt like a boy, they just only partially felt like a girl.
• Orpheus is autistic. His special interest is music, and he loves talking about it to anyone who will listen. (Usually it’s Eurydice or Hermes.) He fidgets and stims a lot, and is also very awkward and doesn’t quite understand social cues. He tries his best, but always finds himself accidentally making things weird. Sometimes he worries that Eurydice will stop loving him because of his autistic traits, but she assures him that she loves him for who he is. Also, he’s somewhere on the ace spectrum, though he doesn’t use any specific labels.
• Persephone is also autistic, though she is much better at masking it than Orpheus. She also has ADHD.
• I’m chill with many different interpretations of Sweeney, but I think it’s quite interesting to hc him as trans or nonbinary. (I mean, what cis person names themself Sweeney?/j) He was in the closet when he first started dating Lucy. He was terrified of coming out to her, but eventually did, and she was quite accepting. She was relieved that maybe this meant they didn’t have to keep their relationship secret, and this was also how she realized she was bi. He also came out to Mrs. Lovett at some point before being sent away, and she was also very accepting, and has proven more than once that she’s really good at using people’s chosen names, as it was really easy for her to start calling him Mr. Todd when he returned from Australia. (Also, Mr. T could be a very punny nickname in this case.)
• Sweeney is also autistic. He’s gotten decent at masking in public, but whenever he’s at home, he makes no effort to hide his autistic traits. He stims quite frequently, usually by aggressively shaking his hands, punching his arm, fidgeting, or pacing. (Is pacing considered a stim? I feel like I do that a lot as a stim, but idk.) He also has an incredibly strong sense of justice. This is most notable when it comes to himself and how he’s been wronged, but he also feels that way on a societal level too. He rants a lot about people who get mistreated and people who abuse their power. (Mrs. Lovett can attest to this, as she’s usually the one he rants to.) Prior to being sent away, he felt like Lucy was the only person he could truly be himself around. Post-incarceration, Mrs. Lovett ends up being the one to fill that role. At first he’s quite nervous, but he ends up opening up more, and realizes that she’s a safe person to be himself around. In fact, she’s the easiest person for him to be himself around, because she’s also neurodivergent.
• Speaking of which, I headcanon Mrs. Lovett as being autistic and having ADHD. She’s always got several different trains of thought, is all over the place, and though she’s chatty, she’s a bit awkward, and feels that Sweeney is the only one who truly understands her. She’s also had many special interests and hyperfixations throughout her life, and is known to infodump a lot. She stims by flapping her arms and doing little dances. She also has some vocal stims, like humming or singing random notes to herself.
• Mrs. Lovett is ace. For a long time, she never told anyone because she was terrified of being judged for it. She was also scared that no one would ever love her because of it, and though there was no way Benjamin could’ve known, she sometimes felt like maybe her asexuality was part of why he chose Lucy over her. In attempts to impress him years down the line, she’d sometimes act in ways that felt strange and uncomfortable to her. In order to make herself feel better about it, she’d tell herself that it was like a comedy act, and that it was more about being funny. (She’s also the type to be really good at making sex jokes because sex is a joke to her, although she doesn’t joke like that often. Her preferred sense of humor is puns.) After a while, feeling like she can no longer hide it, she finally comes out to Sweeney, and nearly breaks down crying while doing so, fearing that she’d ruined her chance at him ever loving her. To her surprise, he accepts her, and he comforts her until she calms down, letting her know that she never has to make herself uncomfortable for his sake.
• Toby is the kind of person whom people can’t tell if he’s gay or aroace. He can’t tell which one it is either.
• Tbh, every version of Wednesday Addams feels autistic coded to me, so I’m including musical Wednesday as well.
• Morticia Addams has bi wife energy. Gomez is her number one ally.
• Lydia Deetz is hella sapphic. The Maitlands are the first people she comes out to, and they’re extremely accepting. After a while of being nervous, she finally comes out to her father and Delia, and they also accept her. Delia isn’t super educated on everything, though she’s well-meaning, and she even buys a sapphic flag colored crystal for Lydia. Beetlejuice takes her to her first pride event. It’s chaotic for everybody there due to Beej’s presence, but it’s definitely a fun time for Lydia.
• I also headcanon Lydia as autistic. Her special interests are ghosts, horror, and photography, and she loves infodumping about them.
• Beetlejuice is pansexual. I suppose that one’s not really a headcanon and is actually a thing in the musical, but I still wanted to list it.
• Martha from The Secret Garden is ace and autistic. I mostly say this because I’ve played her once, lol. Idk, I just like the idea.
• Veronica Sawyer is the biggest disaster bi.
• Jo March is ace and on the aro spectrum. She doesn’t really care all that much about sex or romance, though she has occasionally felt romantic attraction. She doesn’t really care about gender when it comes to the people she likes, but she does also identify as sapphic because she really likes girls. (I mostly like the idea of her being sapphic because people suspect that Louisa May Alcott was, and she based Jo off of herself.)
• Christine Daaé doesn’t really use any labels, but she did once find herself crushing on both Raoul and Meg.
• Meg Giry is sapphic, which she realized after having a crush on Christine.
• Because of that one line in Driving Through the Moonlight, I have decided that Prince Topher is ace now.
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karinonsan · 7 months
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My new hyperfixation is bookbinding/DIY notes and producing DIY prints with sketchbook paper. Another thing is, lucemond is also my current hyperfixation ship and won't it be cool if I make a Lucerys and Aemond themed notebook since I have several sketches of them? 🥺🥺🥺
This is just prototype number #2, since i cant actually arrange double-sided layout print on my own and I'm still trying out sizes... and because I need a quick fix fr serotonin, so the actual layout designing and stuff will be... revised gradually.
Hopefuly I can also try out a lil bit of stitchbinding next when my waxed thread arrives!
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froggyworlds · 11 months
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listen listen ok I was going to put something menacing or lyric-y but every lyric I looked at fits every voice belongs to you and I can't put them all so just take this before I explode
@mustangsart here's one of the fics I promised/alluded to I can't remember which
tw for minor self-harm, guns, and a moment of contemplated/mentioned suicide. plus other typical htb-related content warnings (ask if you want smth tagged tell me and I'll add it!)
If Mark had been holding anything a few moments ago, it would've dropped to the floor by now. His hands shook at his sides, and the trembling spread up his arms to his chest and his legs and for a few moments he was certain he was going to fall over.
He didn't, though he did stumble back a step. Somehow he even found it in himself to remember to breathe in a wheezy, gasping inhale that made his lungs ache and his throat go dry. The man's hands flew almost subconsciously to his waistband, and he watched as a pair of eyes followed them with a spark of- no. Stop it. Don't do that.
¬ Don't shoot me, Mark. ¬
Mark's fingers twitched, an itchy, clawing feeling tugging on the threads in the back of his mind like a kitten kneading a wool blanket. His hand froze, but didn't fall back into place at his side.
Standing across from him, within arm's reach, as far away as anything had ever been, was-
It was-
God, it was-
"F-fuck," Mark stammered, and took another step back.
The thing that looked like Cesar didn't move in kind. Besides the flicker of its eyes, it didn't even seem like it was breathing. As much as Mark was trying to avoid looking at its eyes, the two kept locking gazes.
He- it. It wasn't Cesar. It wasn't Cesar. It's not him. It's not him. Stop thinking it is. It's not what you think-
It looked exactly the same as it had last time Mark had seen it, and the last time Mark had seen it was three years ago. Phantom pain echoed across his scars, and the man winced at the memory of a halo of glass. But everything was the same- the Cesar standing before him was as frozen in time as the one in the photograph weighing heavy in his left breast pocket.
For the first time since its appearance, the alternate moved. It reached up and, in a gesture that seemed all-too-painfully human, drew its hand back in again hesitatingly. Its brow furrowed in what could almost be mistaken for worry.
"Mark, you- you're crying."
As they say, "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me."
Mark felt his legs buckle anyways. Call him a fool.
The man let out a sob and bit down on his left forefinger- hard. It didn't do much to stifle the sound, and something tasted like crimson now, but it gave him something to focus on besides-
"Mark! Are you okay?"
I think I'm going to throw up, was going to be his response, but unfortunately all Mark could muster in response was another half-choked sob, and he jerked away from the hand that reached out for him even when every part of him wanted nothing more than to cry into his friend's arms until his sleeves were soaked and for them to go home and pretend like nothing bad had ever happened in their lives, even if only for a few hours.
After a second, a word escaped his throat: "No." It evidently stung, because Cesar the alternate recoiled and a pang of something heavy struck through Mark's heart that he immediately grabbed and tossed away. This wasn't Cesar.
"You're a monster - a fucking thing. My best friend is dead and you fucking killed him!"
Sweat-slick hands gripping the handle of a gun. The click a millisecond before the bang.
“You’re not him. You’re not Cesar. You aren’t- I didn’t shoot- You’re not him.”
No matter how broken its expression looked. No matter how tired and terrified Mark was.
"I'm sorry. Mark, I'm so, so sorry."
¬ I'm sorry. It's complicated. ¬
Memories rang like church bells in his ears. Half-human shrieks. Half-human.
"It hurts, Mark. It hurts."
Mark couldn't fucking do this.
He pulled out his gun before he could think and for a second the world teetered. Overwhelming déjà-vu coursed through him as he gripped the weapon, sweaty palms and safety off and maybe it would be so, so easy to turn it around and forget all of this ever-
Mark dropped the gun. Clicked the safety back on and nudged it away. He could feel Cesar's eyes on him the whole time, noticed the way he inched away slightly and still hadn't come back yet.
"Fuck." Mark looked up, expression pulled tight and the shakiness of earlier suddenly gone in favor of an all-consuming exhaustion. Cesar still looked like he was eighteen. He still looked exactly as he had the day at the church. Mark dragged a hand down the side of his face. "Fucking Hell, Cesar."
The alternate's expression brightened, a glimmer of hope-but-not-daring-to-hope in his eyes. Mark stopped him with a slightly stiff wave and brought his hands in front of him to pick at his cuticles. The sidewalk was cold and slightly damp from the rain, and Mark pushed himself to his feet, brushing himself off and watching as Cesar did the same.
"I can't-" He sucked in a breath. The air reeked of petrichor. "I don't... know. How or why you're here." He motioned to the alternate and something zipped up his spine. The man shivered and adjusted his jacket, doing his best to ignore the dry, hollow coldness that momentarily jabbed his thoughts. "And I can't just- forgive what happened."
Three years since then. That's a fucking lifetime. It feels like yesterday.
Cesar thought for a beat, and Mark did his best not to do a double-take on how much it really did look like him.
¬ I was alone. That whole time. I missed you. ¬
And in words: "I understand."
Mark bit his lower lip, but not enough that he could taste blood. "We'll work on it, okay?" He clenched and unclenched his fists a few times. "We should go home. I'm exhausted." The man paused for any sign of a change, a sudden dark smile or something or anything one would usually expect from an alternate. He wasn't sure how to feel about the pang of hope in his chest when there was none, just an almost vaguely relieved look from the other.
Mark let out a yelp, suddenly finding himself wrapped in a pair of arms that ended in hands that held onto the fabric of his jacket like a lifeline. It was a hug.
Oh, it was a hug.
Mark held on in return, almost instinctively. Cesar felt oddly small now, but still familiar enough to imagine just for a second that things were normal. He wasn't sure if either of them would be able to let go.
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faggyangel · 5 months
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another day another hour spent thinking about diagnosing ed with BPD
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qualityplaidturkey · 2 years
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Tbh, I was only asked by two people for this…and that was all the prompt I needed! Here are my,
Sad Anthony Headcanons:
• He used to cry himself to sleep whenever he realized/remembered that his parents perfered Sam over him. He eventually stopped crying though, who would want him anyway?
•He always thought Lia was nice to him because she liked him regardless of his weight. But once he lost it all she began to make jokes about how she was glad he wasn’t fat anymore and wasn’t disgusted when people shipped them together. He still likes her though. Even though she’ll never want him. Not like he needs her.
•Speaking of his weight, he used to be fine with his body. But when he realized how people treated him because of his weight, he stopped eating lunch. It was easier to pretend he’d eaten at school. Eventually lunch also went along with breakfast. He claims he doesn’t want to wake up early to make food and his parents pay no mind. This has gone on for so long that his body will get painful cramps and he’ll get physically sick if he eats more than one full meal a day. Snacks are fine sometimes but his body is unpredictable at this point. As long as he’s skinny.
•His dad was glad when he saw Anthony loosing weight. Anthony had only found out that he could skip meals because his dad had talked about it before. Dad would never actually eat breakfast and “intermittent fast” until 12 and then only eat small and portion controlled foods. Anthony partially blames his dad for his sickness. But he also understands that his dad is probably sick too.
•He’s extremely jealous of Sam. Like badly. The amount of times he wished she was dead is way too horrible for Anthony to admit. He couldn’t help it. Seeing her get all the love and affection he wanted from Dad made him angry. But he didn’t show this anger outward. His dad was all about calmness and peace and as a desperate attempt to please his dad, he vowed to never become an angry person. He internalized his feelings to the max. He sat infront of the mirror and forced himself to smile and then relax his face into a completely neutral state. Blank. He pulls this face whenever someone makes him annoyed/upset and he doesn’t wanna react.
•He’s always alone. He doesn’t understand how his sister has friends. Of course he understands that she’s well liked and accepted but how? Anthony can’t keep anyone for the life of him. He’s a good friend to laugh with or to swim in his huge pool but real friends? People he could trust and laugh with and not feel judged by? Non existent. Even the group of kids that peer pressured him into bullying Kenny. He never felt safe or close with them but he saw the teasing as a way for them to continue to accept him. He would do anything, ANYTHING, to keep them interested in him.
•He hates coming out. He knew that he was queer from a young age. Like 5 years old. When he asked his dad what a random rainbow flag on a restaurant they passed meant, his dad went pale in the face. His and his mom started arguing in whispering voices. His dad said things like “he’s too young to know about that” and “when he’s older”. Eventually it clicked and he felt raging shame. He later realized that his dad wasn’t homophobic but he grew up in a time where being gay wasn’t really a thing. His dad hadn’t been prepared to approach a situation like that but the damage was done. His dad continued to try and have a conversation about it but it was mostly just him talking and Anthony doing his neutral face. He just remembers him dad saying that he shouldn’t “let other boys at school influence him” and that he could “make a decision like that when he was older”. Sam overheard and gave dad a whole lecture about it. And of course, his dad agreed with her. Because she was LaRusso 2.0. The Golden Child.
•Sams savior moment didn’t really change anything though. Anthony desperately clinged onto how he could like boys but he also HAD TO like girls. Because at least he could still make his dad happy by marrying a girl. Now that he’s older, he’s unlearned that forced heteronormativity but that voice of doubt still lives in the back of his head. His dad and him don’t ever talk about his sexuality. Anthony’s fine with keeping it like that. They both know what they know. It stays an unspoken fact.
•Around fifth grade when Anthony began to accept himself more, he decided to come out to one of his closest friends, Zach. He thought that since they were from California and Zach had said that his Aunt was gay, that Zach would be cool with. He was nervous but excited all day to finally have someone to share his secret with. He was talking to Zach at the gate after school and just blurted it out.
“I like boy and girls.”
Anthony had watched as Zach’s face went from normal to disgusted. Anthony felt a chill go up his spine and Zach continued to look disgusted.
“Ew.”
Anthony felt like he was dying.
“Do you have a crush on me?”
Anthony’s cheeks went pink and he immediately shook his head. Zach relaxed and sighed with relief.
“Good! As long as you don’t have a crush on me.”
Anthony pretend to laugh with him and then Zach’s mom pulled up and he left without saying another word. Anthony cried himself to sleep that night. Zach and him never talked about it again. Ever since then, he’s hated coming out to people. Whenever he does, he’s transported back to his stupid little ten year old brain who thought that a cis straight middle school boy would accept him. Now he just keeps his mouth shut and pines over a girl who doesn’t deserve him. A pretty fit ending if you asked him.
•Sports make him cry. He guesses it’s from growing up as a fat kid. He used to hate it but now he’s glad that it makes him emotional. Working out so the only way his mind stops being on airplane mode and he actually feels something. That something being stress and sadness while he does lunges across a gym floor.
•He feels emotions heavily but since he just internalizes and observes most of the time, he can never answer Sam when she asks what’s wrong or tries to be a good sister. And it makes him feel ten times worse knowing that something is wrong but can’t even find the words to describe it. After a while she gets frustrated and tells him off for “not expressing himself” and “cutting himself off” but he can’t tell her that he literally can’t do those things. He falls back into the neutral face again.
Ok, I think that’s all for now! I have alottt more of sad hcs to give but I think I’ve written enough already. Let me know if you want more :)
(Please don’t make me write more, I got sad as hell writing this 😣)
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little-skunk · 1 year
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Grian has a bit of a baby face, no acne or facial hair in sight. So, he notices how people tend to baby him even if he clearly isn't regressed and he hates it. His height does not help him either.
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ocdhuacheng · 1 month
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pochita being denji's only safe space left... but even that getting kind of warped now
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nimue-hidden-lake · 2 months
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💘 & 🎞 for an s/i of your choice!
~ @botanists-little-cookie
Hi there and thanks for the ask!
One of my choice? Hmm… Guh, I wanted to avoid it but I have to talk about some story plans so I have for my CATZ story (I am tempted to publish the roadmap for the second part but still debating if I should… Because I want to talk about it so badly). Allow me to talk about HypMic(!)Ann here, with the focus being on their ship with Gentaro. If I involved Ramuda and Dice we'd be here for ages.
Askgame here
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💘: Why would people love your ship? Why would people dislike your ship? How might it start debates?
Ok, let me tackle one at a time. It is quite a bit to unpack. I want to answer all points as unbias as possible (that’s a lie, I have some bias… Obviously. But let me try to approach all questions to some extent, best I can).
Why would people love the ship? Good question, I actually have thought about that. And by that I mean I have my own reasons why I enjoy working on this duo in particular (it doesn’t mean that I enjoy working on the others any less. I just have lots of fun when thinking about the dynamic). I think these could be reasons speaking for liking Genann:
I think the most obvious reason would be that both are authors. They share an interest and are active in the same field, yet not identical. Ok how does that contribute to the pair? How is that a point for appeal!? Well… They actually complete each other in that field, in a weird sense. Gentaro is a renowned author, a popular one in–universe, respected by many. Meanwhile Ann is more a hobbyist and publishes their works for free and the only time they sell their work is at conventions (they are part of a circle where they write fan novels). They have different lenses at approaching writing as a whole and different success which allows them to bond in more unique ways than most in the cast yet also gain different perspectives. Also it might be funny to some how the Gentaro Yumeno is actually terrified of Ann’s skill as a writer as they are oblivious to their work ethic (not to mention them having no idea what a writer’s block is) which could lead to a more comedic side where for once Gentaro is a bit in disbelief. Uh… Long story short, the fact alone could make the ship appealing and perhaps for some create an interesting dynamic overall.
Another reason why it might have appeal is the teasing. Just seeing Gentaro going ham on Ann and messing with them in different ways could be interesting to watch. Not even they are immune to his teasing. It is more comedic if anything probably but it can turn things more interesting.
Lastly is the surprising amount of depth the two turn out to have. Unlike the other two, Ramuda and Dice, Gentaro cannot be straightforward with Ann. There are a lot of things complicating the relationship which prevents it from being official for some time. Firstly, to keep a long story short: Gentaro is not actually Gentaro but his twin brother. He poses as Gentaro however and investigates who put his brother into a coma. So he is essentially living a lie. That is listed as the main reason why Gentaro keeps his feelings a secret from Ann (he is lucky that they are extremely oblivious to signs when someone is romantically interested in them). Because he is afraid how they might react when finding out he lied to them all this time, that he isn’t who they believed him to be. That is a big deal. And things become even messier between the two when Gentaro finds out Ann is the child of a guy who is the leader of a terrorist organization. Said guy is trying to pressure Gentaro into joining, having dug up dirt with his connections to figure things out at most higher ups of Chuohku might know (to add context the leader had an influential past which allows him to have several connections which is how he got access to that information to begin with). And Gentaro cannot stand that man. While it does not shatter his view on Ann (as they openly oppose their father once they learn of this fact) he becomes even more hesitant. Their father hates him and he hates their father yet Ann themself cares deeply for this man, even if he is doing something horrible right now. I could also see that he is just afraid to get Ann involved further since then, not wanting anything to happen to them. What he is doing is risky and they are already at enough risk as it is. And yet to not set off any alarm bells he puts up his usual act around them at all times… That is until he slips up by accident and they take note of this slip up right away. But that is just Gentaro’s side. What about Ann? Well, they of course get behind Gentaro’s deal bit by bit and at first start to be filled with doubt, somewhat. However, they know that he has his reasons, not sensing anything terrible. It is an intuition. Plus how he shows to care not just for Ann but also Ramuda and Dice. So they decide in the end to put their trust into him and wait for him to talk. They don’t want to pry and get information leaked of the actual ‘Gentaro’, they want to figure out themself who he truly is.
And I just went on a tangent at the end, my bad. But I think explaining how complicated the situation between them is could be an appeal point of its own. It’s not a slowburn for the sake of being a slow burn but rather a relationship which needs some conflicts sorted first before anything can happen between them officially. And that could be interesting to watch. Also a contrast to Ramuda and Dice who are pretty straightforward as a whole and ask Ann out with no hesitation whatsoever. Gentaro isn’t simple at all.
Now to the downsides. Why would people dislike the ship? Because there are a few reasons I’d imagine. It is a bit shorter since all the upsides could also be seen as a downside I imagine.
I can see the teasing becoming too much for people. For some it has appeal, others might find it annoying. It could be hit or miss. And if you already find Gentaro’s teasing moments annoying then you might not like the dynamic since it involves a lot of teasing. Not even Ann is safe after all.
The complicated nature could maybe also be a turn off. Maybe some might see this as an unnecessary slow burn because it is obvious how both feel, but one side prevents them from getting together. It could be like watching something taking a bit too long and it becomes really long stretched perhaps for someone’s liking. While I did try to convey the reason why it is complicated if someone is not into such a complicated dynamic or it slips up somewhere, I can see it would turn people off from the pair altogether.
Of course, the obvious answer: If you dislike Ann or Gentaro individually, you might not like this pair overall and think the one could do better with someone else. And if one dislikes both… Well, one might find this pair annoying.
Lastly, Genann is part of a polydynamic. So if someone were to like only one of the three relationships and it is not Genann they might be annoyed at the fact that he is also getting to be with the same partner. Poly dynamics might not be for everyone I’d imagine.
Lastly, the debates. I could see it starting debates to some extent. Kinda? Sorta? Though some sound obvious. I dunno if you can call them debates but some conversation fuel at least.
If early on where all is open ended we have the classic ‘Who do they end up with?’ debate. Gentaro is heavily involved since there might be signs early on that he is interested in Ann, or going to be interested. These types of debates. Pretty straightforward. The reactions when it turns out that everyone wins might be funny as it could be an unexpected twist when Ramuda says he's fine if Gentaro and Dice also wanted to date Ann.
As it progresses there might also be debates of the nature of the relationship, how it is supposed to be read. Are they more rivals? Or is it some type of dynamic where the mentor switches? Maybe people are not sure how to interpret them at first. Heck, some even saying it is not a romance at first and Gentaro is just fascinated by Ann due to their own nature.
Then later perhaps a debate on the relationship as a whole, maybe theories. ‘Do the Yumenos and the Wolffs share a past!? Are they rivaling families!?’ type of deal and people perhaps reading too deep into it. In truth it's really nothing beyond Gentaro and Ann's father not liking each other. Maybe funny theory crafting debates happen based around that.
🎞️: What ‘canon’ scenes would the fandom point to as evidence for the validity of your ship?
Haha, I will go all out on this one. Spoiler alert, I assume… The plot points are a bit far away though and I am literally dying to talk about them (they are noted down on the roadmap though some can be found in Part I). Because I think there are a lot of scenes which could be seen as ‘these two are going to be canon’ material. Again, maybe that is just me though. I have thought of scenes or already written scenes in Part I which can be seen (and are) evidence for Genann being or becoming canon (I will link what I already wrote as reference… Which is not a lot at the moment):
It all starts with the two meeting at Ann's university (Secret Archives Track 3). Gentaro shows some intrigue towards Ann and notes that they seem unusual. While not a strong hint, some could read it as a starting point. Not to mention Ann themself shows a level of interest, eagerly wanting to attend a reading held by Gentaro and seeming to have a deep respect. Saburo himself is annoyed at the two holding smalltalk which can be seen as him being the third wheel.
This interest is later intensified (Literary Genius). Gentaro points out qualities about Ann he finds interesting and appreciates. During his reading they stuck in his memory, being someone he could talk to on an eye level as an author. Both have a shared interest after all. Even if he ends up baffled by how good they are at interpreting and their writing skills overall.
Later on there is Ann's side of things, how they see Gentaro as an equal and a rival. They announce this rivalry openly to him and want to be at least on par. It's not a hostile rivalry but a friendly one, between authors. This can be seen as them getting closer, bonding. And for a while the last hint until Part II. As a side note: To keep Ann happy and motivated Gentaro agrees to this rivalry. Also to be entertained by how they surprise him next.
A big indicator in Part II could be when Ann is in a slump. For context: They have been involved in an attack in the story which put them into a rather unsettled state. They try to distract themself by writing yet the writing is rather dark. Gentaro cannot witness this any longer and drags Ann away to have fun… So basically the two are going on a date for the day, even if none of the two say it.
There are several instances where Gentaro messes with Ann, his teasing becoming a little more intimate sometimes if not flirty. And Ann falls for it everytime.
Ok this is something I talked about above as it is involved in their complicated relationship, perhaps it is going to be the definitive evidence for Genann on Gentaro's end: Him showing a moment of weakness. When alone he cracks and starts to speak how he would under normal circumstances, not acting. It is exactly when Ann is distraught, finding out their father is the leader of a terrorist group responsible for some attacks across Japan. They have a moment where they just yell and swear to expose Chuohku, even ready to die. Fearing he could actually lose someone over this (possibly again, even if temporarily) he grabs them and pleads with them to calm down, to not say something so careless, let alone do it. He is literally begging them, showing concern for their safety. Yet he also forgets himself for a moment, starting to talk in a way which makes Ann say “Wait… That's not Yumeno–Sensei” (basically indicating that they start to think something is up, but have no idea what). He presents himself vulnerable and lets his emotions get the better of him. He ends it off with ”Sorry… And yet I will beg thee to not be reckless…”
As for Ann's definitive evidence, it happens later. The bit of context you have to know is that one of their father's crewmates offers them information about Gentaro, what they want to know. They are hesitant, wanting confirmation for their suspicion. And yet, they hesitate all the same, not sure if they should accept. However, when presented with the chance again with Gentaro present they decline and walk off. When he asks why they rejected the offer they turn around to tell him the following: "Y'know… Right, I could've taken that envelope and read up on you myself. But that'd be pretty shitty, wouldn't it? Hah… Don't look at me like that now. I just don't wanna read up on it. Right now it ain't my business anyway. If I find out… I want you to tell me. I want you to open up about it. Until then, I won't pry. Whatever you're up to, it's your thing. But… Promise me to tell me everything once you're ready Gentaro. I would love to get to know the real you someday.“
Those are all scenes so far, at least the major once. Quite a bit probably.
I thank you for the ask. In the end it was a lot to cover… I went on tangents here. Hope you didn't mind that. And thanks for giving me this opportunity as well! Hope the answer was satisfactory!
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bingotime · 7 months
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thought too hard about how im being perceived and have gone through 30 different iterations of how stupid and annoying i look to everyone and that everyone hates me. this sucks man. none of that is real, youre making shit up in your head, get real. but that is very difficult to internalize. but i know it is not real, does this make sense. i cannot assume for other people what IM like. but equally half of my fear, if not all of it, stems from how im being perceived and it is awful. its why i dont go out my way to meet new people, i overthink EVERYTHING and dont know how to stop myself
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niishi · 1 year
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say what you want about dudebros but they're the only ones actually discussing anime in canon, that you can have an actual debate with and they're not on twitter the next day making a call out post about you bc you argued over a disagreement
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tomee--bear · 2 years
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thanks for all the love on the future au :)
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hamd-some · 1 year
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Halfway into writing my Phobos's lore document, I witnessed it with my own bare eyes that I revived and reworked Lady Amagony's character of all ocs and not only that, she had the dynamic of Mob and Reigen with Phobos, AND SHE IS LITERALLY THE PERSONIFICATION OF ALL DOJA CAT SONGS
#SHE IS THE MOST COMPLEX CHARACTER I WROTE SO FAR AND SHE IS A BASTARD OF A WOMAN (derogatorily affectionate)#I LOVE HER BUT I WANT TO FIST FIGHT HER AT THE DENNYS PARKING LOT#like what the fuck#This lad this bitch this- this literal employer's self insert oc manifested into a bestie#I want to bite her ass ngl but let's get on the update that I have from writing the lore™#I'm not spoiling anything oh no no no- this is still a half baked idea that may or may not make it to the final design but Lady Amagony?#it's a matryoshka doll that contains alterations of Phobos's identities that stopped being a matryoshka clone and was strapped#into a bloodsucking machine to be the employer that put Phobos and her on a timeloop as their friend.#She (she used to be a he but I'm not going to misgender her) became a reason why Phobos become the director in first place according#to that said employer that kept him and her in there. Shit happens yada yada and because#Phobos found out he's been living in what I consider is a sleepwalker project but for living in a another world where#'what you do doesn't make a impact to the real world except for the result' and seeing Phobos just fucking breaks alongside#that she grew to become her own person rather than something to entertain said employer...#She had a redemption arc and toss herself and Phob into the emergency exit door which led immediately to death to their physical body.#Amagony doesn't have a body I should mention that since she is just another alteration of Phobos's own self.#They woke up and have their final reset. Oh yeah I fucking forgot how matryoshka clone even work okay okay so- to put it simply:#Whenever Phobos dies. His body revives itself and he wakes up completely as a blank canvas that forms his own individuality#from the holes of his memories. So with that and the fact that they are no longer attached to the machinery that#kept them with that employer means they are free and are mortals. I liked the idea that there's generation 1.5 where gen1 is just#fucking reduced into somewhat like gen2 grunts because hey. Gen1 probably a rough draft that the Maker made when#he created the inhabitants of Nevada right? So anyway yeah. That and they don't fucking remember anything they been through unlike#what happened when they are in the timeloop and Amagony just straight up tell Phobos she wanted to be a woman the moment they just woke up#and took him under her wings after some... Bonding time in hell. But mostly from his power discoveries at first#And then they are inseparable and Amagony have every skills Phobos has but no power. Matryoshka Phobos is but that's about it.#He doesn't know shit. So not only that Amagony becomes a con-artist she's also Phobos's mentor for a bit.#I'm still choosing whether or not I should make them work for the SQ or the AAHW just to give the Auditor a heart attack because#they wasn't supposed to be in otherside nor the battlegrounds of Nevada because that also means the employer that kept them in the#timeloop is on the loose lmao press F to pay respect for audi guys lol#She's trans and a con-artist and the most sass queen that the world is about to witness but most importantly is Phobos's first person#who is kind to him (even though she is a part of himself) and even seeing her as parental figure
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payphoneangel · 1 year
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the finale was bullshit for a lot of reasons but one thing i feel like we gloss over is that series finale Sam would be an absolute dog shit father.
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kaleschmidt · 2 years
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DSAF Assorted HCs
Just a note that some of these HCs involve my own AU/verse where the main gang are given a second chance at life (labeled TKPverse)! These are like highly self-indulgent
Jack (he/they/it)
Jack grows a shitty mullet (Affectionate) post-DSAF 2
Actually likes to keep his hands busy. Machines aren't his specialty, but he likes sewing + knitting and actually was the one who knitted the scarf for Dee's birthday!
Had a fling with Harry (actually canon guys. trust me.)
Everyone in DSAF 1 has played a part in Jack loosing their front teeth at least once in all universes
After the true end, Jack is the only one with solid information of all the timelines he went through. Everyone else can remember pieces of different timelines, but only vaguely
The whole Kennedy family is Filipino (with the family moving to the US). Jack wasn't as close to his heritage as his other siblings, but he can still understand Tagalog. He just can't speak a lot of it.
LOOVVEESSS chicken adobo. He overseasons it so badly though. Corpse tastebuds.
look i get tall jack but also. 5'2" jack. hear me out.
Dave (he/she)
Dave's far-sighted, but he never figures it out until TKPverse, and even then, he refuses to get glasses until he's forced to. He rarely wears them, though
Dave uses both his name + William, though he prefers only people close to him use William. Still hates being called 'Willy'.
Ambidextrous!
Dave is humanoid but... no one knows what he exactly is. His anatomy is somewhat normal, but his body has some kind of muppet-like/felt texture, with his hair similar to craft fur. Also he does taste a bit like eggplant.
Genuinely likes licorice
Usually done unintentionally, but Dave sometimes falls asleep with her eyes open. This has scared the shit out of Jack several times
Dave has lots of boundaries regarding his hair. Jack's one of the few who's allowed to touch and style it
One of his most prized possessions was this. It was one of Dave's few toys back then
90% OF INCIDENTS WHERE JACK LOOSES HIS FRONT TEETH ARE BECAUSE OF DAVE.
Steven (he/him)
I'm gonna be honest i do not have a lot for him. Sorry Steven i love you stil.
Before his springlock incident, Steven's favorite animal really were foxes!
The type to have really old movies probs
Peter (he/him)
Genuinely likes Rick Astley, especially his album "Whenever You Need Somebody". Has unintentionally rickrolled the family several times
^ He also likes Sade. One of his favorite songs is 'Smooth Operator'
He's the dad in the grocery store who has his song come on and then starts doing a jig to it and embarrasses his kid. Jack joined in. They were both kicked out
as long as we don't have any information on caroline idc idc peter was THE fucking malewife. and he was also the wifeguy. he loved his wifey so much he would go on full fucking rambles to jack about caroline on the phone
Eldest Kennedy + the closest to his heritage. Peter knows perfect Tagalog and also learned his mom's family recipes!
Dee (she/they)
dee i am also so fucking sorry i don't have a lot for you.....
Dee was never able to have her 18th debut, but TKPverse, I believe Peter + Jack made sure to give her the most extravagant surprise belated debut! The only guests were the main cast but Dee was still touched. Also yes the kennedy brothers did get a custom-made gown for dee
They love all cats, but their favorite breed would be ragdoll cats
Dee doesn't know a lot of Tagalog, but she's learning more from Peter
Matt (he/it)
He's allergic to nuts. Why the fuck did he accept Jack's payment? god if i know. Matt also has an orange allergy
Matt has NPD because that's my medal of honor to him, along with the he/it
After the California location shut down, Matt just. disappeared. No one heard of him since then. Jack was only able to find him by dialing random numbers
SPEAKING OF DIALING! Matt can literally use anything as a phone. He does not have an actual phone at all and he refuses to get one
Has complete knowledge of the alternate timelines. You didn't hear that here, though.
Nobody knows if he's human or not but they're afraid to approach him.
Matt is capable of genuinely smiling, but never does so during work*. If Matt ever genuinely smiled during DSAF, it probably would have a reversed effect of attracting people to him. a bit scary
It's so used to having a forced smile that whenever it talks to anyone, even if it's not face-to-face, Matt ends up putting on a forced smile
So fucking tired.
Matt usually listens to music as background noise. This usually consists of metal, screamo, breakcore, and/or the most drilling sounds known to men. If you ever asked it its favorite song, Matt would say "the one with the screaming :)"
the percentage of how many times matt was involved with making jack loose his front teeth is low but is not 0.
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