#someone whos SUPPOSED to be my best friend doesnt fucking talk to me anymore

[grimsneverendingfuneral]

questions for grim questions for grim, grim loves questions questions for grim

what clothing item is a key part of your character design? what’s your ideal night out like? what are you like at a party? mountains, beach, forest, desert, or jungle? WORST fruit? who is your best friend, what are they like, why do you love them? what makes you laugh?

ooooh questions!!!!! yay!!!!!!!!! you know how much i love these. i will say i am quite flattered by your interest in my being. i'll do my best to give you some good, thorough answers

clothing item that is a key part of my character design is my lock necklace. if i dont wear it i feel ill. i will not feel like myself. i will feel significantly less swag and thats not good for me. its basically a small lock on a chain i wear around my neck. my dad gave it to me when i was a teenager, said only rockstars can wear shit like that. and i was like oh in that case

ideal night out is literally texting everyone "whats the moves tonight" then meeting up on a street corner and letting montreal unfold for us the way it does so beautifully every time. just walking around with my friends drinking a beer and laughing. talking. meeting characters on the street, letting them take you to your next adventure. but if im planning a night out, its usually going to be going to a show at some dingy venue and drinking at someones house beforehand, afterwards finishing the night off at a bar dancing or playing pool, then hit the diner or a pizza place. typical city slicker shit

im assuming by party you mean like....house party? so i'll answer that way. at a party theres two grim modes: either im aloof as fuck and finding ways to entertain myself that dont require human interaction (like going around and looking at whats in the bathroom cabinet, playing your instruments or chilling with the cat if there is one). usually in that mode if im not going off by myself im sitting on the couch watching everyone with a distant look in my eyes. off to neverland somewhere fr. the other mode is im standing in the middle of the room and actively working the crowd like a fuckin court jester. i really really like doing that and im really good at it. but i only do it if i think the people at the party are going to be receptive to it. nothing worse than a loud fuckin clown who cant read the room

mountains. mountains. i mean god i love the ocean. but mountains do it for me. i could cry

WORST FRUIT is......hm. i think there's nothing worse than a berry sold in a single plastic container at the grocery store in the middle of winter. like i tried eating some raspberries the other day and they were so fuckin sour and tasteless. i love fruits i dont think theres a worst fruit i think theres a worst time to eat certain fruits

oh my god noooo im gonna go on a tangent. my best friend's name is Chloë. We've known each other since we were twelve. she's the reason i'm changing for the better. she's the reason i'm making active changes in my relationships, ones that have me feeling a sense of belonging for the first time in my whole fuckin life. the love she's shown me is a key factor in why i don't isolate anymore. we've been friends and drifted and been friends again a couple of times and now our friendship has hit a new high. its like a breath of relief, to have her in my life. she taught me that love isn't supposed to be anxiety inducing, that receiving a text from your friend isnt supposed to make your heart jump to your throat. she taught me that friendship doesnt have to be this chaotic, symbiotic rollercoaster where you're always looking to get fucked up together or have secret animosity and resentment towards one another. it can be kind. it can be fun, at all times. it can be this natural pull between two people that just feels pleasant. she taught me that other people can love me for all that i am and that i dont have to hide the ugly mangled parts of myself to be loved. she encourages my very being every day. she embraces all of me and has a brilliant mind. she's so caring and attentive and so fuckin smart. emotionally intelligent. when we're together, we talk and talk and talk and philosophize ourselves into fuckin oblivion. our minds meld and elevate each other. she teaches my know-it-all ass things every time we talk. with Chloë, i can truly just be. we can be quiet together. i just feel the love emanating off her and its like.....oh i get it. friendship is the ultimate act of devotion.

and lastly well. everything makes me laugh. its all so funny

#anon #this went crazy

[theonewhopees]

cybersex

i had a friend (group of friends) i wrote with very often

for the most part it was pg-13 but those of us who were (above 18/adults/of age) began passing smut around (perhaps we were bored/perhaps we were (i was) lonely)

and two of us frequently collaborated, me and another guy (acquaintances). we talked to each other a lot, and i suppose i wanted him in the (curious as in curiosity) way that comes from knowing what someone (does and doesnt like/is into). i see "i like (x)" and think "i could do that to you"

and one day he made a (joke/passing comment)

and (something changed/a fire lit in me (too cliche)) i misunderstood. (and suddenly, (i was willing/it was more than curiosity))

(and after a few moments of mutual misunderstanding), we decided to give it a try. (and i wanted, i wanted)

(i wasnt stupid/i understood boundaries/we were still acquaintances), but i wanted, so i touched him through the abstraction of a character (i told him he could only touch himself the way the character i wrote could)

it was clumsy (id thought that (sex was something id moved past/i didnt need it anymore/i was too scared to ever want it again), but i did my best.

i hope he enjoyed it (i felt like a live wire, sparking and frayed at the edges, my thoughts disconnected and reduced to ones and zeroes)

(he asked for a picture, but i couldn't give it, caught up on the lack (i wanted so badly (id never be able to fuck him, confined by the lack (something i hate to think about, something i am missing))))

by the end of it, i felt like the flow between my legs had short-circuited my brain

(the only vibrator i had) the toothbrush i used as a vibrator (the head) was connected to the motor by a thin stick of plastic. that night, i dropped it on the floor and that stick snapped in half

but i was lonely. i pressed the side of the broken end to my clit and made do (pretending a million things were different)

i think it broke (a dam) something in me, because the next day he posted samples of his voice to the chat we exchanged ideas in, and all i could think of was (how much i wanted to feel his skin on mine) the way his voice would sound calling my name

but he was far enough away (to experience time differently than me/that his morning was my night/does it even matter?) that it would never happen, so i settled for listening to his voice and (wondering/wanting)

#nblm nsft #nsft #mlm nsft #trans nsft #about possibilities #sorry if this sucks i wanted to make a poem abt gay sex but it was also like 5 am so #cammys poetry

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[underscorecc]

2.

ive reached another time where i feel like i need to vomit out all the shit thats been churning in my psyche. you know that feeling where you dont want to go to sleep because of this subtle sensation in your stomach? I think its dissatisfaction, both with myself and with the people around me.

the girl that i broke up with turned out to just be a hoe. She played w my heart and told me i was " the right guy at the wrong time" and that "she needed time to be single" and then immediately hopped onto some mid ass white dude LOL. anyways i fucking hate her guts. not cause she doesnt like me anymore, but because shes a damn liar. on a positive note it just means that little plot threat in my life has just been tied up, and now all i have to do is reconcile with the distrust for people that ive already been harboring, so nbd.

the ppl in my life kinda got me fucked up tho. right now i feel like theres no one genuinely there for me. I have a therapist, but you cant rlly get the level of intimacy with a therapist in the way youd have with family or friends. so right now i feel like i have nobody. my friends all suddenly seem extremely disinterested in talking to me. someone who i consider my best friend barely texts me and brushes off making plans and never reaches out. and my other friends just dont seem to really care or respond to me anymore. I get replies, but im not having conversations. it also seems like my mom is tired of me. shes even said it herself. she gets annoyed at a bunch of little things that i do. so i dont think id be wrong to assume ive become a nuisance rather than a valued family member.

it totally could be me. it totally could be them. it also totally could just be a series of unfortunate circumstances so ive been kinda torn trying to figure it out. I know im partially to blame. i can be overbearing and i dont know when to shut the fuck up. its hard for me to do genuine real talk anymore. I say "real talk" and then give advice to friends (probably unsolicited). but i never rlly talk about stuff that goes beyond skin deep. I talk about terrible moments in my life, like when i was sa'd or like something fucked up ive done, but its water under the bridge and doesnt rlly affect me anymore. i dont know, i just get the feeling that people will be repulsed if they see the real me. the me that is insecure and struggling and tired and angry. god im fucking angry, but im also so goddamn complacent, which is infinitely worse.

i am in the process of changing my life in a drastic way, which is needed. wont say how but it should shake things up in a good way. unfortunately its also partially a waiting game. so im stuck here in this in-between where i am given the privilege and honor of being alone with all of my thoughts!!!

i think i am having an identity crisis. I dont know what defines me anymore and i dont know who i want to be. ive thought about changing my name. im already changing what i wear (slightly). and weirdly enough even though i am a straight, cis dude, i occasionally have very very slight doubts about my sexuality and gender. its probably normal tho who knows.

I think this stems from a lack of masculinity in my life. having high free testosterone does not make me a man. being aggressive or stoic does not make me a man. but theres this concept of a real man in my head as something to aspire to be, but its an extremely vague and loose concept ive formed. despite being 20, i dont really see myself as a man. but im not a boy either. not to say im non binary. im just in this awkward in-between period. I wish i had a genuine masculine figure in my life who i could look up do. my dad is more like reddit atheist ben shapiro who debatelords me when he doesnt like me doing something. i dont live with him anymore so those problems are in the past, but the lack of a male role model is catching up to me, and its on me to define my own masculinity, but like fuckkkkkk i dont think ur supposed to do this by urself.

i been feeling mad weak. i always was a pussy on leg day and its showing now that i havent been to the gym for months. it really makes me feel pathetic. that 15% increase in struggle for things that i used to pick up with ease is really shameful, or embarrassing, or idk. it just fucking sucks. I want to be a strong person who cannot be surmounted, like a legendary dragon. But at the same time i dont know if these desires are my own or some responsibility i put onto myself as a means to gain social acceptance. its probably something i should put thought into when im eating enough and actually going to the gym, but i think ive been holding off because i feel so pathetic.

its a brutal cycle too. I feel pathetic from prior experiences where ive been demeaned (so a lot) -> i feel i dont have the grit or willpower to do something -> i try something thinking ill fail or just avoid it outright -> i feel pathetic. shit sucks ass.

anyways word vomit over thats p much it

[thedeathwitchescats]

This is the only place I can say shit and no one i know irl is gonna see so fuck it. I just want to fucking kill myself. I hate everything. I hate myself most of all. The only thing I can imagine at this point is someone fucking killing me. Or me killing myself. I dont care. I hate life. I left school to get away from the drama and the drama some how fucking followed me. Fuck this. Fuck my life. I have no alcohol to drink and dont feel like snorting enough of anything to get high. At this point I am about to fucking smoke. Its the only thing i have left and that will fuck my whole life up. I want chaos but not this shit. I want adventure and good things and happy shit and stuff like going down to the Valero with my girlfriend and getting weed and snacks. Or sneaking out to go drink with my friends. Or sitting in the parking lot at school talking to my girlfriend. Or go out on Friday nights to a movie with my girlfriend. Or something fucking normal. Not depression, ptsd, anxiety, did, bpd, ocd, hsd, adhd, bulimia, anorexia and every other problem strung between me and my loved ones. Just, normal life. I want normal fucking life and i am slowly realizing I am never gonna get that. I chose the people I chose and I would rather peel my skin off and sell it to the devil than back out on them now, but i also chose fundamentally not normal people, and I myself am a fundamentally not normal person. I am never gonna get a normal happy life. I get weeks on end where I can barely force myself to move long enough to eat, convincing my girlfriend not to kill herself, constantly worrying about my best friend, praying that my mom doesnt fall asleep on the road because she works too many hours, desperately trying to keep peace between people who want nothing more than to kill each other, hoping none of my family dies when I am not looking because those motherfuckers managed to kill their lungs so bad I cant walk out of my room in the middle of the night without hearing my uncle cough an entire lung up. I dont get normal. And even if I leave somehow, even if I run away, even if I move out, I am fucked up enough on my own. I cant get out of bed some days because my body refuses to move and my mind is running a million miles a minute racing with thoughts of hurting myself. I cant regulate my emotions without someone giving me an idea of what I am supposed to feel. I cant accept that people care unless their actively telling me and even then as far as my head is concerned their probably lying. I lose my shit on people for things they have no control over because I think their abandoning me. I cant stop hurting myself in some way or another. I cant fucking do this anymore but now I am stuck in a deal with the one person who I love the most so I have to stick it out and pretend I dont want to peel my skin off.

#🪓 #vent

[byuqi]

im back~ so school ended a couple days ago but BOY LEMME TELL YOU I GOT TEA. okay well i honestly don’t know the full story but tea is tea so lemme spill 😋

okay so basically my two friends who imma call 🦶and🫄 are best friends but 🫄 used to be my best friend until 🦶 stole her from me last year

so they’re like those friends where if 🦶is mad at someone then automatically 🫄has to be mad at that person too or else 🦶 will get mad at 🫄

AND FOR SOME REASON 🦶 GOT MAD AT ME⁉️⁉️ like imma be fr i dont even know why she’s mad at me bc the last time i talked to her was on May 19th and we were perfectly fine but then i sprained my ankle and didnt come back until like a week and a half later and then suddenly shes mad at me?

so the way i found out 🦶was mad at me was because i was tryna talk to her but she was just ignoring me so my other friend who imma call (N) was like “hey 🦶 bambi is tryna talk to you” and then 🦶 is just like “oh i know” LIKE TF⁉️⁉️ so then (N) and i just look at each other and shrug our shoulders cause we don’t know wtf is going on with 🦶

now fast forward like a week later i still dont know why 🦶 is mad at me and now 🫄 is ignoring me too and none of our other friends know why they’re mad at me. and even tho they’re mad at me they still hang out with me and the rest of our friends at lunch they just dont talk to me and then 🦶 offers some chips to (N) and our other friend (B) and she sees me looking because i was sitting next to (N) and she says “Y a que te mires?” which means “what are you looking at?” so i just said “nothing” and she rolled her eyes then called me a bitch 😭 AND WE HAVE THIRD PERIOD TOGETHER SO I HAD TO SEE HER THERE AND SHE KEPT GLARING AT ME DURING THE WHOLE CLASS LIKE⁉️⁉️ also whenever she gets mad she doesnt tell people why shes mad and just expects them to figure it out?? like shes done this before and i’ve had to apologize even tho i didnt do anything wrong

so now lets go to the last day of school so im hanging out with (N) and (B) again and ofc 🦶 and 🫄 are there too with our other friend (M). (M) and i have always been close so i was talking to (M) and she was standing next to 🦶 and then when im talking i hear 🦶 say “no vale verga” which is kinda like “i dont care” but in a mean way so then (M) just looks at me and is like “i dont know why she’s acting like that just ignore her” so i did and then when i get home i decide to check (B)’s location bc she was supposed to come over and i notice 🫄 turned off her location and she only does that when she doesnt want to be friends anymore so im like oh shit because even tho shes not my best friend anymore like we were still friends so yeah now 🫄 isnt friends with me anymore 🧍

anyway thats all and i’ll update if i find out anything else but thats all for now

-🦌

HI BAMBI MY LOVE❤️❤️❤️❤️

well said!! tea is tea and if has to be spilled one way or another 🤷🏽‍♀️🤷🏽‍♀️🤷🏽‍♀️

OMG NO BC I LITERALLY HAD THE SAME THING HAPPEN TO ME THIS YEAR WHAT. 💞 and i were bsfs bc 💞 was new in the school. then ☠️ came along and they became friends and 💞 left me like i was nothing. im talking like i was literally the person who made her who she is rn in the school like bffr girl🤨🤨🤨🤨

lets be real here? we all know stinky feet tryna be you fr🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄on a real note they’re both fucked up in the head. yes i get that thing of “if shes mad at you im mad at you” BUT ATLEAST HAVE A REASON TOO??? like it doesn’t make sense to me at all. shes a real bitch for ignoring you straight up like that and still saying “i know shes talking to me” BFFR?????? see me personally i would immediately remove myself from them two as soon as possible. you know why i think stinky feet is mad at you? bc she knows you could have ms preggo back whenever you wanted to bc you two were bsf. I SWEAR ITS ALSAYS LIKE THAT TELL ME IM WRONG🤣

but at the end of the day, remove yourself from them 2. fuck what they think and fuck what other people think, its your life and youre not gonna let 2 dumbass bitches ruin it for you bc they “dont like you” MAN STFU😭😭😭also FUCK MS PREGGO🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕

neways, thanks for the tea bambi😘😘😘i love listening (reading) drama!! ily and stay safe❤️

#★ ei chats #★ ei’s anons #★ ‘ 🦌 anon

[decomposingdoll]

Tw- sh, suicide, rant, alcohol, heartbreak, etc

I've ruined the only chance I've ever had at happiness. I've genuinely chased away my soulmate because I said something stupid while I was drunk. I didn't mean it, I don't even know why I said it, I told one stupid pointless little lie (about smoking no less) and just like that I've ruined everything. I've lost the only person I think will ever love me as much as they did. And that kills me. Ive been miserable since. Technically we haven't broken up yet but they won't even talk to me, so I'm not holding out hope... I'm just devastated that it's all going away.... I thought our love for each other and our relationship would be strong enough to make it through something like this. It kills me because I know I'd forgive them if it were the other way around, but I can't be mad, I did it to myself. It's my fault, and I forgive easily because I'd forgive anything so someone I love doesnt leave me. I just feel like we could move past it maybe, if we could just talk, and maybe they could learn to trust me again, I've never given any other reason to not be trustworthy... But that's not my choice to make. If I've hurt them that badly, and they chose to never associate with me again, that's their choice and I'm going to have to respect that, but I don't know how I'll love with myself for it. I feel horrible, scum of the earth level. I hurt the person I love the most, and even if they do forgive me, ill still struggle to forgive myself. Knowing that I caused them pain, when I'm supposed to be helping them, and loving them and doing everything for them, it kills me inside.

I'm a wreck. I'm barely sleeping, I'm barely eating (it's taken me 3 days to eat a fucking tiny bowl of pasta) because I just can't stomach anything, my chest physically hurts, I just feel like I'm breaking apart. I'm always on the brink of a panic attack, and I can't go an hour without sobbing. Nothing is making me happy, I don't want to do anything, the only thing I enjoy is sleeping bwcause in my dreams sometimes things are okay, I'd even take a nightmare over this. I have work tomorrow and I'm just dreading it, my world is crashing down and I have to go and be cheery? The worst part is, as much as I want to and I feel like I deserve it, I can't hurt myself. Because I can't ever have that on their conscious, even if it isn't their fault. If they ever found out id done anything as a result of this, wehter its sh or worse, I know they'd blame themself. They have too kind of a heart for their own good, and even though it would never be their fault, only mine for how badly I screwed up, I know they'd think it was their fault, and I can't bring myself to hurt them anymore than I already have. I just don't want to live in a world without them. It seems dramatic I know, but genuinely they were the only person I had, my best friend as well as my partner. Nobody has ever loved or cared for me more, and I've never loved or cared for somebody more myself. I truly believe that they are my soulmate, I thoight we would grow old together. Its not like the other times where I convinced myself I saw a future with an ex, I truly truly did. I still do, I just don't think they want that future anymore. I'm just ranting rn to the void because nobody reads this but I needed to say it somewhere, I needed to rant and the only person I can really talk about my real feelings with is the one person who hates me the most right now.

I've decided I'm going to go sober if they do decide to forgive me. It was alcohol that caused me to say something stupid, therefore no matter how much it makes me feel happy, it turned me into a person I don't want to be, and caused me to screw up the best thing I've ever had. It's a small price to pay if it means I can get my soulmate back. I'll try to stay sober even if it doesn't work out, it'll just be harder because there will be less motivation to, and I don't know if I'd be strong enough without the motivation of never hurting them again. I'm planning to tell them about the sober plan when I see them in person, I'm hoping soon they'll say qe can meet up and I can tell them, and we can talk about us and figure out where we stand etc, but so far they don't even want to talk to me, let alone meet me in person.

All I can do is hope and pray that they'll find it within them to forgive me, and we can move past this together, working on our relationship and rebuilding trust, I'm just scared that won't happen.

[insertdisc5]

Hi!! I wanted to ask, in celebration of Deltarune CH. 2, do you have any updated thoughts and head canons about the game?? Like, y'know, similar to a previous ask about Kris in your Deltarune tag? Thanks!

thoughts on kris part 2 i guess???? (part 1 from ch1 here lol)

spoilers for deltarune like woah. this wont be kris focused just random thoughts on everything. thank you for giving me the opportunity to talk

not that many thoughts for this chapter tbh! EDIT LOL: this was a lie i have a lot of thoughts

-just in general i feel like the player isn't the only one controlling kris... like yes the player forced kris to do what happened in the snowgrave route but AT THE SAME TIME idk it feels like there's someone else too. just because of the terrifying voice i suppose. and also the jerky movement kris does every time they get their soul out? unless there's another reason for it... maybe getting your soul out means you walk weird lol

-BUT ALSO i feel like kris is 100% in control when they create fountains. idk it just makes sense kris would create them. to create another world, a better world, A WORLD WHERE THEIR BROTHER IS HERE PERHAPS? i do wonder why they get their soul out then though. i'm all for it sweetie! do whatever! i support you!

-(i am and will be playing deltarune with only kris' best interests in mind. i will not hurt anyone unless kris wants me to. dont worry my little meow meow im on your side! talk to me! no? okay ill stay under the sink its fine)

-speaking of asriel. SUMMER VACATION COLLEGE WHEN? SUMMER VACATION COLLEGE WHEN? SUMMER (starts crying) V-VACATION COLLEGE WHEN

-kris misses their brother so much it's so sad. if you make kris steal 5$ from asriel they take it "reluctantly"? talking to asriel online so often even alphys knows?? the google search?? GOING INTO ASRIEL'S GOOGLE SEARCH ROOM WITH THEIR EYES CLOSED BECAUSE THEY'RE CONVINCED THEY ALREADY KNOW WHATS IN THERE? THAT ONE IS LESS OF A MISSING THING BUT IM LIKE OH MY GOD

-the city walk with susie at the end makes it clear to me that kris really values susie's friendship... kris even sits with her if you spend long enough near the lake like aaaaah ;_;

-and even in snowgrave you spend your last acts with the final boss calling for your friends like YES there's a way bigger creepy aspect to this (kris as more of a Leader who Commands and commands their subjects to come) but still :'0 (and then noelle answers oh my god noelle im so sorry for the trauma)

-berdly. listen. listen. listen. liste

-berdly sucks but [berdly hurts his arm in the battle against queen if you don't save him because he doesnt want to hurt you] [berdly realizing smg's wrong in snowgrave and immediately taking steps to save noelle] berdly is my little crumb nugget. i will protect him.

-noelle. noelle. girlboss!

-like ooooh listen. hearing about the genocide path for undertale. made me go "that is SO COOL. i HAVE to experience it myself this is great. hehehe killing time" and like no regrets. i was fully enjoying the experience knowing i was an awful person. SNOWGRAVE THOUGH. i will never try this myself its too fucked up. casually grooming your childhood friend to murder people <3 and also acting like a weird stalker towards her <3 stockholm syndrome speedrun i will get all the info i can about this but i will never do this myself

-people remarking the kris/player>noelle relationship is similar to the relationship between player>chara in genocide path is like yes. chefs kiss. don't worry we just are making you stronger and everything will be fine "you made me kill my friend? and for what?" this is fine sweetie don't worry about it!!!!!!

-like the amount of details added to snowgrave, like if you equip noelle's watch she notices later? and her battle animations change as time goes on, she gets an ice shield and stops sighing in relief after battle? oh my god? oh my god.

-(berdly is not awake.) JUST KILL ME RIGHT HERE I HAVEN'T STOPPED THINKING ABOUT BERDLY NOT BEING AWAKE!!!!!

-also why didnt he turn into dust. so many possible reasons. is magic a thing in the normal world and perhaps no magic means no dust (theres graves). maybe he isnt dead. maybe hes braindead. maybe he'll come back. either way that boy is now in the closet big enough to put someone in

-also dess' name probably being december AND THATS WHY NOELLE LOST THE SPELLING BEE?!?!??! FUCK ME UP!!!!! JUST FUCK ME UP!!!!!!! OH MY GOD!!!!!!

-also so many good pixel art this chapter. too many? i didnt need pixel art of cardboard noelle falling on the statue. like thank you but please. please it hurts my game artist brain.

-the expressions in this chapter were also top notch. all the unsettling noelle expressions like (i fall over face first)

-i threw away the ball of junk (which i already tried in ch1) and this time the game was like "ARE YOU SURE BC THIS IS A BAD IDEA" and kris felt bitter :'( (it deletes all your items in the dark world)

-i uh fucked up and skipped the susie+noelle scene bc listen last time ralsei mentionned seeing what susie is doing we missed some PRIMO LORE. turns out it just makes you skip the scene and you dont get anything new. welp

-speaking of ralsei well you know. he exists. but im stuck on him going "i just wonder what being ralsei-like even is...?" ralsei my dude there's so much i could say about this. do you feel like you can't be ralsei-like because you feel like you have to be asriel-like

-but also that makes no sense bc susie hasnt even mentioned ralsei looks like asriel. and i cant imagine asriel being so meek. so WHAT GIVES

-ralsei as kris’ “i wish i was a monster just like my bro and family and i’d look like asriel but with red horns [THE HALLOWEEN COSTUME] and my name would be something cool like ralsei instead of a boring human name like kris and im sweet and cute because thats how i act with asriel because ASRIEL MADE ME” theory because that would be cute.

-ASRIEL GOING TO THE CHURCH TO CONFESS HIS "SINS" WHEN "SINS" AREN'T A THING IN THE ANGEL BELIEF LIKE I KNOW THIS INTERACTION WAS TREATED AS A JOKE BUT WHAT THE FUCK ASRIEL?

-kris definitely has a connection with the big red door in the city, judging by what the kids say they probably went there... i feel like this place's dark world will be the Final Dungeon you KNOW some shit happened there. also the sounds you hear when you go there is the phone dark world call's sound slowed down? AND AFTER SNOWGRAVE APPARENTLY YOU CANT HEAR IT ANYMORE? HUWAH?

-speaking of songs the songs were all so good, My Castle Town rules, the berdly snowgrave music is stuck in my head, flashback is uwah wuahah, Until Next Time is so good, AND ALSO A FRIEND NOTICED THE DARK WORLD CITY THEME IS JUST tHE SONG 74 (MOST NOTICEABLE WITH THE SNOWGRAVE VERSION)?????? WHAT DOES IT MEAN????? it might be just "hey its just reuse" BUT MR FOX YOU KNOW WE'RE GONNA READ INTO THIS IS NOELLE THE ONE SINGING IDK BRO!!!!!!!!!!

-asgore dreemurr fired from the force what happun!!!!! game theory is that asgore is related to dess' death/disappearance but eh who knows

-you start the chapter at lvl2 and get to lvl3 after the final boss, a friend mentioned this is probably because we destroyed a world and im :0

-to go back to kris it's still so interesting to figure out who they are based on how they act/people mention them. like kris shaking the ferris wheel car? yeah makes sense i can imagine a pranking kid do this. kris' dance? yeah thats a little silly but i can buy it. doing cool anime poses? well i dunno this doesnt line up PERFECTLY but sure. BUT EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENS IN SNOWGRAVE... especially >proceed like that is such a weird thing that i can't imagine them doing, but i can't completely see the "player" doing either (compare with going to sans -which kris doesnt know- and going "SANS!" because of course the player would know sans), like THATS one of the reasons i feel like there's someone else in there. the weird robotic merciless actions. if im going super meta it feels like there'd be someone else like writing the choices into existence for us to pick you know? gaster probably? god i need to read more gaster theories i completely sidestepped the gaster shit bc i wasnt interested. anyway just spitballing

-(looks at big shot guy) please dont make him the next tumblr guy i beg you

-obligatory "queen was great" mention if only because this part made me laugh a little bit too hard

that was a lot. thank you for letting me talk

#ask tag #deltarune #deltarune spoilers #snowgrave spoilers

[lurking96]

Hi I just wanna know that I'm not the only one that viscerally angry at the 319 and bkg being continuously forced into the narrative and down or throats, and the fact that 1-A or UA thought INSTIGATING A FIGHT OR CONFRONTING IZUKU WAS THE WAY TO HELP HIM?????

this is a child that left the school of his dreams and his safe space at the thought of endangering his friends. Did anyone absord what his letters probably said??? How is putting the whole class on display and in the line of fire supposed to encourage Izuku to come back?? "They're all out there now, in the open, in the line of fire, BECAUSE OF ME"

that's what he's thinking. Not "oh wow my friends are worried I should go with them and make all of them and the establishment we belong to a target for the people that have made it abundantly clear they want to kill me and do not care who they hurt to achieve that goal!"

Also I am thoroughly FED UP with bkg belittling Izuku to get a reaction. This isn't the middle school playground anymore, it isn't about All Might and his legacy or bkg's fucked up sense of competition with his victim. It's about Izuku. It's his story, his journey and no one elses.

I'm so MAD ugh. Sorry about this i just needed to get this out it really frustrated me

It is fine to vent to me if you want to. And what you said is right. As they don't really know what to do they sadly listened to Bakugou who made himself up to be the profesional "deku whisperer". Yes he knew him from before UA. That doesnt mean he knows everything and whats best. Solving things through a fight is a pretty bakugou thing to do. He doesnt have any other coping mechanism or problem solution mechanism. He never got called out on it. Them coming out of hiding is probably putting a strain on Izukus paranoia. Just a bit ago he saw someone randomly explode. So that of course increases his fear. And yes. This has been Izukus arc so far. As the main character he does deserve an arc of his own. What he also deserves is rest. This will not be how he will get healthy rest. They should first try to talk to him.

#anti bakugou #bnha chapter 319

[autisticzukka]

what is this hakoda zuko arranged marriage you speak of? i am intrigued

okay so the long story short is that it’s a slight rebuttal of a popular post that is very fun but i find like... unrealistic in a really intriguing way like, how would this ACTUALLY play out. I’ve talked about it at length in my server a few times, and it’s one of those AU’s -- like the genderbend zukka ATLA rewrite or the zukki fic that starts with sokka failing to assassinate zuko -- that lives rent free in my head and I’ve written a couple thousand words for.

tw for like VERY unrequited zuko in love with hakoda and the inherent comedy of sokka being in love with his fire nation stepmom.

so here’s hakoda, chief of the southern water tribe, happily not-married to Bato. and here is a more balanced war, where the north and the south are actually  allies, rather than whatever the fuck they were in ATLA. Yue already has a fiance and the Northern chief refuses to remarry. that leaves hakoda responsible for biting the bullet and doing a political marriage even though, as he points out at length, he is an elected official and if he stops being elected it’s no longer a marriage with the chief of the south pole. intelligently but mostly selfishly motivated (yue’s fiance is his nephew, after all) pakku points out that its not like the fire nation knows... that. the fire nation is dumb. ozai’s stupid.

faced with such inarguable points hakoda stiffens his upper lip, pre-emptively ends things with bato on the understanding that if this is another kya situation they’ll get back together and that he’s still the most important person to him but the tribe comes first yada yada, and deals with katara throwing the mother of all tantrums. it is slightly softened by the fact that in return for him marrying the fire nation noble, a thing everyone can agree isn’t traditional, the north has finally agreed to train katara. she heads out before the wedding, in protest but also so as to not cause an international incident.

(on her way, she’ll find aang. with the war less dire, katara will be sympathetic towards his desire to live without committing violence, even if she deeply can’t relate. they’ll have a hot girl romcom summer of self discovery and coming to terms with the dichotomy between duty and love as they become master benders. at some point they pick up toph. they ARE a throuple.)

sokka meanwhile is like.. not cool with it.. but ? kind of relieved? like. he’s the eldest kid. he’s 18, and he’s been a man of the tribe as far as legalities for several years. it would have been entirely understandable if his dad had asked HIM to do it. he had his emotionally crushing romance with yue, and as much as he was like ‘im kind of a prince’, he finds he doesn’t actually want some of the responsibilities and demands that would bring. yue’s life sucks.

back in the fire nation, zuko never demanded a quest and never went on it. he’s spent years hardening into something that, while brittle, can survive the pressures of the court around him. he still has his scar. he still wants his father to love him, but he knows by now that it’s not something he’s capable of earning. he watches his sister, never the most stable person, start to have complete breakdowns of sanity once she hits puberty, and helps her cover for it and receive medical treatment on the down low. he’s the heir, but he lives knowing that if he was ever in a position to inherit his choices are to abdicate or have the baby sister who he raised kill him and destroy herself and the country in the process.

when he realizes the plan is to marry azula off rather than someone more reasonable-- mai is RIGHT there, for fucks sake-- he doesn’t realize ozai’s true intent is to fuck this up through malicious compliance and false shows of good faith. he panics, and does the zuko thing: he blurts out that this is unacceptable and immoral and she’s only 16 and Ozai sees the true opportunity for two birds with one stone. send zuko, let him piss someone off so badly he gets killed or divorced, and he gets rid of zuko from the line of succession permanently. there are those who are incredibly attached to teh idea of a firstborn for firelord, and it’s been a constant thorn in unpopular ozai’s side to nto be able to name azula his heir apparent without costly rebellion. but if he can taint him in the mind of the fire nation so much that birthright is easy to supercede-- yeah. this’ll work PERFECTLY.

so zuko is sent to marry hakoda, chief of the water tribe.

literally NO ONE was expecting it to be a member of Ozai’s immediate family. besides the fact that his oldest child is half hakoda’s age and his brother has 20 years on hakoda, it would have been sus as fuck - the treaty is not favorable enough to grant that kind of secession of interests. it becomes quickly apparent that this young man -- hakoda reminds himself of that repeatedly. not kid. not kid. young man. don’t think of him like a kid, it’s hard enough on both of us already. -- is not a horrible threat. he’s scared shitless and shakes with what he thinks is bravado. he’s desperate to make the marriage work. he’s desperate to not go home. he’s got a giant fucking scar on his face from where the fire lord punished him for some grievous but unstated offense.

zuko “daddy issues” fire nation sees his husband to be and, despite being scared shitless, immediately begins to soften a little. like... he’s not nearly as scary as he thought he’d be. his face can be stern, but it just as easily breaks into huge smiles, and his eyes are crinkled with laughter. he’s incredibly handsome. and his biceps are. his biceps. are. his hands are...

like. zuko thinks. okay. maybe. maybe his marriage duties. won’t be so horrible as he thought. maybe he’s ready for this. and he knows what to expect, Uncle had discreetly provided him the means and the contacts to acquire an intimate education in the whirlwind of activity that was the two months before leaving. and like, once he’d gotten past the nerves, it was often even... good? or at least... not bad? he thinks that even if hakoda isn’t a professional expert, he has a certain.... je ne sais quoi, if you will.

((DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF))

sokka sees his new stepfather and immediately falls in love because he’s that kind of dumb bitch. (the core of this au is that i cant breathe thinking about sokka falling in love with his hot young stepmom his age who his dad doesnt even want to fuck. like. i CANT. sokka masturbates to ‘hand caught in the washing tub’ fantasies which are even more absurd for requiring zuko to be DOING LAUNDRY. i find it so funny.)

bato watches them at the wedding feast while hakoda is very clearly trying to treat zuko as an Equal Adult Partner and mostly managing to seem like someone having a serious conversation with a seven year old about the game they’ve made up. zuko is clearly enamored with it, soaking up the attention, blushing and doing his best to Bravely Flirt, which at one point includes awkwardly attempting to feed Hakoda by hand. bato has to excuse himself to have a teary eyed giggle, hoping that Kya is in the spirit world looking down and laughing with him. he can’t resent the kid even a little bit, when hakoda is sitting there looking so incredibly fucking befuddled as to what he’s supposed to do with this star struck infant he’s legally wed to

anyways all of this... is very funny. their wedding night... is less so. zuko does not take the rejection from hakoda very well, especially because he’d been caught wanting. HE’S the one who should be rejecting hakoda. and he catastrophizes almost immediately about his potential value to the water tribe, his future treatment, that endless inescapable freezing cold loneliness is the good ending for him here... hakoda, meanwhile, drops zuko off at his home, reassuringly informs him that there’s NOTHING else expected of him and he will be well taken care of, and books it to bato’s. bato refuses to let him in on grounds of ‘you can’t sleep under the same shelter as me on your wedding night to that kid, have a fucking brain’, and he ends up crashing at sokka’s.

sokka, who had KNOWN that his dad wouldnt, but also upon seeing zuko and zuko’s awkward flirting was like... but how COULDNT he???? sokka is relieved.

the core of this fic is that i find it endlessly hilarious for zuko to try and seduce his husband while sokka simps around zuko and bato tries to be heartbroken or betrayed but mostly ends up with a giant case of hysterical schadenfreude. but the thing that CLINCHED it for me, like THE scene. several years after being married, settled into their life. they’re partners and they see each other as people. and zuko just fucking snaps one night

he just kisses him, desperate and clawing and climbing and maybe a little drunk. he knows hakoda is going to push him away, maybe even hit him, but he doesn’t care anymore, he doesn’t care. he can do anything he wants to him as long as he just-- finally does something. zuko is 21 and married to the surface of the sun and the surface of the sun jr is his best friend and clearly in love with him-- so clearly not even zuko can miss it-- and like. listen. listen. zuko is not a patient person. but he’s been patient for this. he waited and he matured and he is a fucking amazing husband and he wants this, he wants him. he wants to be wanted.

but hakoda doesn’t push him away. hakoda doesnt yell at him, or hit him. hakoda gentles the kiss into something soft and closed lipped. he pulls away slowly, and his eyes are so sad for zuko, so pitying. he strokes his cheek with the back of his hand so gently. he says, I’m sorry. I don’t want you.

and zuko daddy issues fire nation swallows

and he nods

and he leaves, even though its his own fucking house

and he knows he’s never going to be good enough

like FUUUCK i am OBSESSED WITH THAT

#long post #lmao i am NOT fucking main tagging this #op #asked and answered #i just want zuko to fall in love with hakoda and for hakoda to gently reject him #noncommittalhum

[autisticandroids]

hey so you know how you said a while back that cas doesnt really have a moc/demon dean or soulless Sam equivalent but if he did he would act the same bc hes horny and loves dean?? I agree and he would just do it WAY more unabashedly. my question is, in the version of spn where the writers are smarter AND more homophobic, how would they justify cas's actions? bc they cant use the cloak of humanity bc cas doesnt give a FUCK about humanity. so what would they do

okay the thing is that cas doesn't have a demon dean/soulless sam style arc because it wouldn't... do anything? the thing about cas is that he doesn't have inhibitions in the traditional sense. like he doesn't... feel the eyes of god or society watching him.

i had a long conversation with @pietacastiel the other day about whether cas has the capacity for "should" - and he really just... doesn't. there are two things that stand in for "should" for cas - one, "if i do this, [insert other person (usually dean but not always)] will like me," and two, "[insert person who i trust and obey] has told me to do this, and i will obey their command blindly because i am a good boy."

like, basically, number one is an essentially machiavellian calculation. he's trying to be someone that other people want around, so he makes himself useful to them or enjoyable to be around or likeable or what have you. it's entirely self-serving and probably wouldn't change if you took away his inhibitions or his empathy or his conscience or whatever.

number two is like... it's too intellectual to count as inhibitions, exactly - it's explicit rules that he has set down for himself, without internalizing. to give an example, cas knows that he's not supposed to watch porn in a room full of dudes, and he's not supposed to talk about it, but he will never understand WHY those things are true. he will just obey those commands.

in terms of other ethical behavior that cas demonstrates... the thing about cas is that he's just a nice person? he's highly empathetic, he likes to make other people happy, he likes to be friends, he's a sweetheart. he genuinely wants the best for people. he particularly wants the best for his nearest and dearest. this is what's going on when he heals babies, or decides that he's not gonna kill kelly, or sacrifices his life for dean. he is fundamentally doing what he wants. he wants dean to be alive more than he wants to not be dead, you know?

this is actually one of the things that makes cas so dangerous: empathy is fickle. if the only thing that's standing between you and murdering somebody is you liking that somebody and wanting to be their friend, you might murder them once they piss you off. or once something comes up that makes them being dead more valuable to you than you being their friend. and this is why cas is kind of a terrible person! this is why he's constantly doing war crimes. he doesn't really have a system of ethics.

now, here's the thing: cas does carry around a lot of guilt, but it's deeply ineffectual. it doesn't really change his behavior towards other people. it only really does two things: first of all, it convinces him that other people hate him and don't want him around. this intensifies his desperate need to be liked, and therefore his trying to be liked, but isn't the root of it. second of all, it makes him punish himself, stuff like trying to stay in purgatory.

now, if we did a demon dean/soulless sam situation on cas... what would that look like?

well, he would certainly lose all that guilt he's carrying around, but how would that affect his behavior? the main two effects, i think, would be to make him more confident and therefore bolder in terms of trying to be liked, and make him stop punishing himself/deciding that he deserves bad things.

the confidence boost might lead to him, say, throwing himself at dean a bit more than he does, but i don't think the change would be radical. i think it would just be kicked up a notch. but it's an issue of rational judgement more than inhibitions so i think he would stay basically the same. now, cas' judgement isn't the best, and in the context of relationships at least, if nowhere else, his guilt complex does semi-effectively combat his natural tendency towards total overconfidence, so it might have some serious effect, but i still argue it's rather a matter of degrees.

and him not punishing himself so much might lead to him doing things like getting more mad when dean treats him poorly, but not that much more, because fundamentally the reason cas doesn't get mad when dean treats him badly isn't because he thinks he deserves it - he does think that, but mostly he's just scared that if he gets mad or sets boundaries dean won't like him anymore. again, it's a matter of judgement. he's probably less scared that dean won't like him anymore if he sets boundaries because the elimination of the guilt complex makes him less convinced that everyone hates him, but the anxiety is still there - it's just less intense.

in terms of cas' other sources of ethics and inhibitions - wanting to be liked, obedience, empathy - these would be affected differently if he was like soulless sam and if he was like demon dean.

if cas lost his inhibitions the way soulless sam did... he wouldn't change that much, at least in terms of his personal relationships. he would lose his capacity for empathy, which means that he would be more likely to be a dick to randos on the street, or commit war crimes, but it wouldn't really change how he conducts his relationships, because the inhibitions he holds in relationships are intellectual, they're a matter of judgement anyhow. honestly i think he might still, for example, happily die for dean, if we're arguing that soullessness comes from a lack of empathy or conscience rather than a lack of all emotion, because his desire for dean to be alive is entirely selfish. he likes the world more with dean in it and that's that. so i think soulless cas would be more likely to be a dick behind the scenes - maybe pull some godstiel arc ass shit again - but it wouldn't necessarily change his treatment of those closest to him that much.

now, a demon dean style loss of inhibitions would look different, because demon dean's basic emotions weren't dampened - he was made more selfish and hedonistic and rebellious, and didn't care about other people. interestingly, demon dean didn't seem to lose his capacity for empathy - remember in black when he punched that guy who was abusive to that girl? he didn't do that because it was the right thing to do - he did it because it felt good, because he empathized with her situation and it gave him a rush to get her out of it. so a demonized cas' empathy is intact. but his "shoulds" - those are all out of whack. he's actively rebelling against them. obviously he would simply no longer obey the ones that are like, "follow this rule and you will never know why." but he would also stop trying to be liked. i think demon cas might in fact tell dean that he's been in love with him for years - while screaming an itemized list of every fucked up thing dean has ever done to cas in his face, and telling him to never speak to him again. hell, we've seen cas throw a temper tantrum like this before - "you're not my family, dean, i have no family" in the man who knew to much. demon cas would be like that except without it then causing him to have an immediate mental breakdown.

i would argue, however, that cas has had his own loss of inhibitions comparable to demon dean and soulless sam - crazy cas. it even follows the alliteration pattern, heh. this is because cas' inhibitions are far more in his brain than his heart, and to get rid of them you need to impair his judgement, not fuck with his feelings. like, his shoulds are entirely intellectual. i want to be liked, therefore i should do this, which will effectively cause other people to like me. i want to be a good boy for god/dean, therefore i will obey this rule they gave me. if you fuck with cas' judgement, you fuck with those inhibitions. so arguably crazy cas is cas' equivalent to demon dean and soulless sam.

anyway, to answer your question, i feel like soulless cas wouldn't necessarily need a cover, like, he might, oh, i don't know, covertly arrange more opportunities to be alone with dean or stuff like that, but he's not going to try and sleep with him because he still has most of his inhibitions in tact. demon cas they might have to admit is in love with dean and then kill, because i think demon cas would probably kiss dean and then punch him and leave. you know. and crazy cas we saw in canon.

#spn #asks #anonymous

[surviving---not---living]

What the fuck do I do?...

**tw emotional/physical abuse mentions**

posted this on reddit with different ages and such so he wont find it but he doesnt use tumblr so I wanted to post here to see if yall had some suggestions as well any help would be greatly appreciated or to just know someone read would also be enough... with that said I'll paste the post.

to start I'm 23f and the fiance is 38m

I have an idea of what i should do i just sincerely dont want to i dont want to leave him homeless and without money or a job...

but the last few months have me scared and confused...

(during arguments he let's me write down what's happening when I hear something that stands out to me in Hope's itll help me fix my behaviour i got from my parents so ive been able to write down exact wording on some things said) theres just so much going on...

to preface this hes never been physically abusive to me and thankfully it's not there yet. in his defense though i was raised very incorrectly due to shit parents and I have a lot of mental issues that cause self sabotage, delusional thinking- meaning If I personally believe something it usually takes a small war to get my mind to recognize im actually wrong, as well as terrible memory so if I do acknowledge I've done something wrong more often than not my head forgets what happened or what i even did wrong if anything and the next time it inevitably happens again I have no information to pull from to tell me what I did was wrong or why. so basically I'm kind of a fuck up, I'm doing my best to fix my shit but yeah my fiance has been dealing with all of that for 4 years now.

(*some minorly important issues

•he's been interrupting me not letting me finish what I'm saying and just outright changing the topic since we first got together, although wrong of me I started doing that as well because i saw no other way to be able to speak to him except even when I'm doing the exact same shit hes doing it seems like hes the only allowed to be upset.

•we were in an open relationship except he didnt follow the rules we agreed to one time and that broke my trust I had for him. we said no coworkers, we said only people we were both interested in we said no one that's taken and yet all of those got broken over an ugly bitch. and I still get shit for bringing it up to this day.

•he said that until I start prefacing all of my conversations with him he wont count any attempt I've made at talking to him about my problems. so basically everything I've tried talking to him about doesnt fucking matter and it doesnt fucking count. not even when I tried telling him 3 separate times I'm feeling suicidal to top it off everytime i mentioned it, it ended in an argument.

•he told me he got suicidal thoughts for the first time in 10 years due to me and honestly I didnt know how to fucking respond to that. it made me sad yeah but where was the care I needed when I brought up the same thing? where was his give a fuck hes supposed to show if he actually cares about me??

•he says he interrupts me because what I have to say is either false, not grounded in reality, or they're excuses. except he has little to no way of knowing any of that is true unless he hears me all the way out I could be agreeing with him and he still interrupts and gets pissed.

•I believe hes a hypocrite but he says nah hes only doing this because I'm doing bad.

•hes said multiple times that i wont see any improvement in him until he sees I've got my shit together. even though hes the one that caused the first problems in this relationship I'm supposed to be the first one to fix my shit? instead of both of us working on our shit together??? and when I ask those questions he responds with yes you are supposed to be the first one to fix your shit because I'm at the end of my rope and I wont take this anymore.)

but on to why I've been scared. this person told me he used to be abusive with an equally abusive ex for many reasons and after splitting up he vowed to never do that again and never end up like they did.

fast forward to our relationship and well a few months ago he told me he wanted to hit me and made it a point to say he wasnt going to but he really wanted to.

he said that because we were both in my car and he wanted to leave with the car except I wasnt going to get out of MY car so he started yelling, i got scared and left later on he told me that was the first time hes ever wanted to hit me and I should think about what it is I did to get him to that point. after that I left it alone for a month because things got a bit better and then came the next time he said he wanted to hit me. now I dont remember the reason for him saying it the second time but I wasnt going to let that slip as easily as the first so I spoke up about it and what he had to say about me telling him it made me scared of him to know he wanted to hit me was " well if you Weren't a coward, normally when someone says they want to hit you it's a signal that you're doing something so wrong that they want to hit you." and me knowing him i knew this was one of those times he just wasnt going to budge.

so on to the next argument.

he told me I'm the one who thrust those thoughts into him, that I'm the reason they ever came to be, I'm why the exist in the first place. and he doesnt seem to understand when I say that no I'm not the reason your head wants to hurt me they exist there because of your last relationship letting that be an option. he also said he keeps the option of abuse in his head with a line in front of it to remind him to never pass that line and he doesn't understand that keeping that idea in his head at all is not a good thing because now the option is available whether you want to take it or not and

he. just. kept. arguing. and defending.

now on to the last argument.

he says he wants me to stop putting him in a position to do all the thinking and decision making for me, when I've asked him multiple times to stop doing that because I want to do shit for myself and all he keeps saying is show me that you can actually think for yourself and I'll stop needing to do that. like motherfucker at least give me the time to make decisions or thoughts.

I know it's not his fault that I take longer to process things but he knows this fact and keeps expecting me to already have a response half a second later to something I'm barely registering 5 seconds after it happened and again yes I know its something I have to work on and I am but atm it's still an existing issue.

hes trying to call thinking for me and making decisions for me "a gift" (the exact context for him saying this wasnt written down as I was too upset at the audacity of that claim.)

he wants me to show overwhelming efforts to fix my fucked behavioral issues but the efforts I'm putting in atm dont matter to him and that hes hanging on a single thread hes no longer willing to take anything but Absolute compliance(yes he used the actual words absolute compliance) if he doesnt see me losing sleep to figure out and fix my shit he wont be convinced I'm trying. he ended that segment with him saying hes not using these words to control or manipulate me. he says this is a requirement a yes or no and he wont make his decision on whether he wants to break up with me until I say yes or no to his absolute compliance. he said his decision is solely based on my answer and If i say yes i dont get to back off or get out of it.

I also wrote down a quote he said that was just so arrogant i couldnt leave it out.

"You sit before an artisan of problem solving." -my fiance

soo haha yeahh the last argument happened right before going to bed and I started typing this as soon as I got up and finished my hygiene stuff.

I'm pretty sure if he had never told me he'd wanted to hit me this wouldn't be such a difficult thing to answer... I love him and I have no idea if I should pick him and risk any form of my safety or just let him leave me.. he has no job, no money, and no family to go to.. I know he doesnt care about being homeless but I do care..I fucking love him and I dont want that for him not even for a day... as shitty as he and I can both be I still dont believe that's what he deserves... if he ever finds this hell be even more pissed that I'm even concerned about what he'll do if he leaves.. he always told me to not care and that if I ever do want to leave him to not worry about that and just get it over with sooner.. thing is I dont want to leave I just want my baby back... the one that didnt yell or didnt want to hit me at all... I want our old relationship back.. I guess I want to know if that's even possible at this point. any words from anyone would be really nice right now.. if only to just feel like someone's talking to me.. my fiance is literally the only person I talk to and the closest thing to a friend I have. and i dont tell my parents any of what's happening because they're stressed enough so I've been basically alone for 4 years with no one but my fiance to talk to..

granted it's my fault I havent made other friends but I've been so stressed recently that I havent done much about it for many reasons..

update: he just finished telling me that hes only had half a burger in the last 3 days, (due to stress) he just wanted to let me know that apparently.

#abusive relationship #tw abuse #mine #relationship #please help me #help #relationship advice #fiancé #couple problems #manipulative #maybe #physical abuse #lost #scared #lonely #what do i do

[tomdiddlyumptious]

i know youre just as obsessed with the save your tears song as me, please make a fic with peter of it🙏🏾😭

lololol sorry i got this a while ago, but yes. i have an unhealthy obsession with this song. 

P.P~ Save Your Tears

warnings: none?? language??

words- 1.8k

You and peter...you and peter were special. When there was peter, there was you. No matter where you went, no matter where he went, you both were with each other, until you werent. 

“Y/n, i love you but i need this college, it means so much to me, tony wants me to go-” “tony wants you to go? He matters more then me? Peter ive been with you since forever” you said, tears pooling from your eyes, standing up in his room while he sat on his bunkbed- his cheeks and nose red as he looked at you. “So this is what its about, making tony proud? What about me peter? What about me?!” you waited for his answer, but when he didnt say anything, you just gave him an empty, sad look, a shocked look,”so this is it, huh? You go to college and you leave me and may in shitty new york, and for what?” you chuckled, “to make your” you did quote on quote “dad proud?” he became angered, staring daggers at you. “He cares about you but i clearly care more, you wouldnt even be thinking about college if it wasnt for me. Youd be stuck as spiderman still trying to make him proud!” you laughed.

“Peter, did you hear what i said, “STILL PROUD”. He doesnt even give you fuckin validation. You know what. Fuck you, have fun in missouri, i hope you make him proud” you said, stomping out and slamming the door behind you, power walking out and accidently ignoring may with your own crowded thoughts while you walked out.

But that was 2 years ago. 

You went to a college in Atlanta, peter long forgot, you and ned decided to go together. So there was a huge party in Atlanta, Harry knew about it causing Peter to know about it too. 

“Yeah theres this huge party in atlanta and i wanted to go” he said, in the kitchen of the apartment, eating chips as he looked at peter, who had his textbook in his hands and his glasses on, he looked at harry “your going out of state...just for a stupid party?” he said, his eyebrows furrowed. “Yeah i go every year,” “and your telling me this….for?”

“I want you to come with me” harry smiled, walking over and hopping on the couch while peter set his text book on the coffee table “i dont think so” he said, “oh come on! The most baddest chicks are their peter! And you need to get over y/n-” “shut up, harry” peter looked at him with a clenched jaw, your name was his kryptonite, making him weak in his stomach and his knees woozy as if they were gonna fall out. “Look, your doing it again” harry called him out. “Ive dated her for over 7 years harry, what am i supposed to do, toss her in the trash?” “Yes actually” he shrugged, making peter grumble before taking off his glasses and setting them down. “i’ll think about it” “i’ll pack your bag” harry did a quick grin at him before standing up and tossing the chips at peters chest. 

So there they are, moving into another apartment for three days, only taking out a few pairs of clothes and leaving it on the bed. “Party is tomorrow, we need drinks and stuff” “if its a huge party what do we need to buy stuff for?” peter asked, harry said, “You're too innocent” before walking off. 

“Ned! I do not need a plus one!” “it wont be a plus one it’ll be a plus two!” “im not going in there as a throuple” you turned to him, he didnt want you to look lonely inside of the party, so why not just go on an open date with betty and him? Because it weird, or thats atleast what you thought. You picked out your dress, your body has changed since senior year, making your curves more evident, which you didnt mind, it was nice. The dress was quite tight in the right places, making you feel confident, you asked betty how it looked, she said if she was a lesbian shed try to dig, which was unusual for someone like her to say that, but youd take it. “Are you sure, y/n?” he asked, genuinely, you turned to him and sincerely nodded. “Yes, thank you” 

And so there it was, harry and peter went to buy the drinks, two bottles of each just for home, which harry made peter try, peter wasnt pleasant but harry said hed need it. 

So there the party was, harry helping peter pick something out, making sure it wasnt too “nerdy” which ended up in harry having to give peter something to wear, an oversized orange shirt and jeans, a black hat backwards and some of peters normal shoes, vans. “Im proud of my creation” harry said while they both looked in the mirror, peter sighed in disgust “i hate you” “love you too bud” 

You and ned got ready, helping him out with which colognes he should use, you made him help you out with the makeup, it was a simple black dress but there was no harm in trying to pop it out, “red” “red? Are you sure? Does it bring out my skin??” you said, he nodded “wear it! And hurry! We have to pick up betty!”

It was 9 o’clock, the party already started as you and your best friends pushed past people to get something to drink, but one drink turned into two, and then to three, and then continuing on. Ned ended up with red lipstick and lip marks all over his face and a tie around his eyes, everyone cheering him on when he was in a drinking competition with the famous gregory, of course ned won, making the boys chant his ned “ned ned ned ned!” and you were in the front row with betty, a red cup in your hand and everyone letting out a deep “wooooo!” and whistles when ned stuck his arms out in the air before taking the tie off, you laughed as the party stopped the challenges and it was dancing time, so betty pulled you to the dance floor, you let out an “ahhh!” as in you didnt wanna dance but she gave you a stern look “loosen up” she smiled, dancing around and her grin widened when you started to slowly loosen up, drinking the forbidden juice in your cup before you threw it wherever.

Peter and harry finally arrived, drinks in hand as he looked around, “there really is hot chicks” peter said making harry laugh hysterically before grabbing a cup for peter. “Just make sure you leave before i do” “yuck” harry passed the cup to peter, and he took a sip, his throat burning before he looked at harry “dont give up, the party has just started! I have to use the bathroom” harry walked off, peter looked around at the different sections, he could sit on the couch but there was people making out there, he could join some of the shot gunning but it was clear they were already thirty drinks in, which left him to the dance floor. 

Dancing in the crowded hall, stood you, as before, his stomach turned and his knees felt woozy as his mouth slightly opened, it was really you. Your hips moving loosely with a huge smile on your face, you looked so much more happier without him, he started to feel bad, his mind coming to memories before you caught him looking at you, making your movements falter. Your mouth open with shock, a single tear coming down your face before he called out your name, you ignored him walking the other way. “Dammit!” he said, placing down the cup he didnt need before pushing past people, he could see the back of your head, he groaned when a girl pushed him “watch where your going dumbass!” she said, peter ignored her and came upstairs still following you, now into an empty hallway “Y/N!- Y/N- i know you can hear me theres literally nobody else in this fucking hallway!” he said, his walking stopped as yours did to, you looked back at him, turning to him. “Please” you made eye contact with him, your face empty as no words came out of your mouth, you walked to him, a hopeful smile on his face, until you walked passed him, your shoulder thumping against his that made him fall, he looked back at you and furrowed his eyebrows, his heart shattered in pieces as he swore he heard it break like glass, it was already cracked. 

You could have asked him why he broke your heart

You could've told him that you fell apart

But you walked past him like he wasn't there

And just pretended like you didn't care.

He ran away from you and now it was your turn, you told yourself not to cry, to save your tears for another day, or for another, he wasnt worth it, at least thats what you told yourself. He watched as you disappeared, sadness engulfing him as he sat against the wall. “Fuck” he ran his hands through his hair before he looked your direction again, tears threatning to roll down his cheeks as he couldnt believe that happened, but it was his fault, and once he noticed that, he broke down in tears.

he made you think that he would always stay

He said some things that he should've never said

 He broke your heart like someone did to his, 

And now you won't love him for a second time.

He didnt know it would make you cry when he ran away, he didnt even know why he ran away. He wanted to chase after you, for you to take him back because this time he really wanted to stay, two years, much too late. He didnt deserve you, you deserved better, not someone who left you for someone he didnt even talk to anymore, tony. 

“Save your tears, y/n” you told yourself, but you couldn't take it, you ran to your car and opened the door, getting in the driver's seat you cried, slamming the door shut as your back hunched and you hit the hunk, kicking and hitting the steering wheel until you couldn't anymore, tears ruining your makeup as you looked at yourself through the rear view, your hair a mess, your eyeliner ruined, you, ruined. you couldn't save your tears, you couldn't save them for another day, or another. Peter, the love of your life, ran away, and you cant love him again, because, he broke you.

#peter parker x reader #college!peter parker #peter parker smut #peter parker imagine #tom holland x reader #tom holland smut #peter parker angst #peter parker fluff #mcu imagine #tom holland imagine #peter parker fanfic

[italianpartybabe]

Again I ask myself: am I insane?

It's so hard to tell what is right. I'm filled with thoughts and feelings that swirl like a cloud. 'You are amazing.' I'm not even sure that was the terminology. This cling to talk to you to get more inside your head. I KNOW NOTHING about you. My experience is your presence, listening, and responding. Is it all a game to you? Or do you care that much about me....it's so hard to fucking tell because I'm doing things I shouldn't. I'm wrapped up in my head and watching myself from 3rd person at the same fucking time. You're fucking magnetic. Its crazy how much I think about you. I feel insane.

I love my husband. I love him in a way that I'm supposed to. I fell hard for him at one point but I remember. The reason I had cold feet is this intrusive thought that I just chose wrong. I chose to be committed and tried and wanted to be loved. I found someone who treated me, ok at best. He loves me don't get me wrong he definitely loves me. But he loves the me I made myself as. Someone he can make jokes about and it wouldn't bother me. Someone who loves video games. Someone who enjoys being apart and not spending quality time together. Someone who has similar interests and is easily content.

Thats not me.

I'm tired of the sarcastic comments. Im hurt by the joking insults we make. Im bored of video games. They make me feel like a child. I wanna be fucking obssessed with each other. I don't wanna sit quietly in a room together and mark that off as time spent 'together' because its not. I don't wanna go out to the club with my friends, i wanna dance on my fucking husband. I don't want to do a wine tour with my girlfriends. I want it to be a fucking couples experience. I am not one of the guys. I do genuinely love being one of the guys, and thats a true part of me. But that doesnt define me. Im your wife. Im hot. Im amazing because of my personality. Im a great time all the time. And i won't fucking accept any less respect of that anymore. I want a house to host parties and raise children. Fucking LOOK at our friends. Theyre doing exactly what I want. Pregnant, house, AND STILL HOSTING PARTIES. Dont ever tell me whats too much for me. I'll be the fucking judge of that. How about you actually support me emotionally for once. Go to fucking therapy and figure out your shit so we can be amazing together! Or don't and idk.....i love you.

[sadwentz]

choose your twin: atsumu miya

pairing: atsumu miya x reader

warnings: relationship issues and nsfw implied.

a/n: finally, the collab is out!!! thank you carrie for doing this with me I HAD THE TIME OF MY LIFE WRITING THIS GOD,,, bruh, this is my masterpiece, i love it sm KJAKSJJASKJ i hope y’all enjoy this!!!! i want to thank my wife who doesnt have tumblr for helping me w this,,, shes the loml and the BEST beta reader i could ask for... tHANK YOU BABY

word count: 2.1k

cyt taglist: @memetabolismm​​ @cuddly-bakugo​​ @wansseul​​ @kuroosbrat​​ @sneezefiction​​ @yusemis​​ @kimimarowo​​ @kairostatue​​

taglist:​ @fryingpanitachi​ @yams046​ @presmiic​ @sushij1ma​ @kingtamakimurder​ @dumbassbrigade​ @badboysdoitbetter2​ @cucktobirama​ @usobad​ @newfriendjen​ @hookedinto-fictionalworlds​ @sanguinekeigo​ @0ikawawa​ @smexygremenem​ @add1ctedtoan1m3​ @wxxnks​ @idiot-juice-enthusiast​ @faitans​ @sanemisthiccbih​ @starlitorchids​ @rureczka​ @ska9r​

WANT ANOTHER DATE? CLICK HERE

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀YOUR CURRENT PICK: ATSUMU MIYA

“i know you’re tired of dating apps for college students!” you growled at the comment, exhausted.

“and this isn't the typical matching you do to me when i am lonely?” you questioned, bokuto raised his eyebrows.

“shut up, y/n, you know what i mean.” rolling your eyes, you covered yourself with the biggest blanket in the bed.

“since i broke up with my ex, you and akaashi have tried to set me up too many times, i don't know what to believe anymore.” you groaned.

“y/n you know you are such a good girl, that’s why this guy it's the one.” he said confidently.

“you’re not allowed to call me good girl, you’re gross,” he gasped and you scoffed, “and how do you know that he is the one? are you… god?” 

he groaned loudly, “god, shut the fuck up, i’m right you’re wrong.”

“you always say that, and you are always mistaken.” you pouted at him and closed your eyes, drifting to sleep ignoring the rest of bokuto’s words.

…

osamu groaned, “yer’ such a pain in the ass, ‘tsumu.”

atsumu chuckled, looking at his body up and down on the large mirror he had on the back of the door of his room. the shirt he was wearing was kind of tight, showing clearly how his every day work-out performed wonders on his upper body. his gaze lowered to his pants, he wasn't sure if wearing those dirty ass sweatpants was the optimal choice, he didn't know if his date was as judgemental as he was, so changing pants was probably the best choice. on his way to his closet, he saw how osamu was scrolling quickly on his phone, paying zero attention to him.

“you’re not helping me today, whatcha’ doing there?” osamu looked at him with disgust, atsumu raised his eyebrows. “why are you looking at me like that?”

“you better not fuck this date up, ‘tsumu.”

“do you happen to know something i don't?”

“yeah, like always.” both glared at each other throwing silent knives.

atsumu finally dressed himself nicely, and osamu didn’t add any other snarky comment for the rest of the morning, letting atsumu breathe peacefully for a few hours. The time for the date was approaching very fast, the weight of his brother's words was making him more nervous every minute that passed by. osamu was supposed to drive him to the place he would meet up with the unknown girl, but he bailed at the last second making him walk there, while claiming that he was the better twin because he had a driver’s license.

his heart was pounding untypically, he was always amazed by how his good looks worked on the female population, but being lowkey threatened by his own brother about going on a date with a woman wasn’t something that always happened. osamu usually didn't care at all about his whole career he had created on his years of being a college student; dominating the feelings of women, wrapping them around his finger only to let them down at the end of the so-called ‘fling’, so his thoughts went to osamu and how he actually called him out about everything else.

people always thought the worst about him when he started a new fling, and usually people were right about it. atsumu had a bad history with women, they always expected more than he could give to them, so he acted like the asshole he was deep down and scared them away. so him agreeing to go on this blind date because his brother’s friend akaashi was involved, probably wasn't a good idea at all knowing akaashi and his friends.

while walking alone on the sidewalk, he was already feeling this date wasn't meant to be, as if he believed in something so foolish as destiny. the place he was set up for his blind date was a small coffee shop not so close to his shared apartment with osamu, but he could manage a thirty-minute walk by himself.

he sent a text to the number akaashi gave him, they weren't really that close, but osamu seemed to trust the guy a lot and at first sight, akaashi keiji looked like a good person overall, so atsumu could try and be nice for once, right?

a minute later, his phone vibrated.

strangerdanger: i’m already here!

atsumu groaned, he was already late.

…

you saw that the coffee shop had booths available as you entered the place, you thought about ordering your drink first, but that was kind of rude, so you decided to sit immediately on the booth that had the biggest window by it, just to have a clear sight of who entered and who was just passing by. 

you arrived ten minutes early, wanting to be there first before your date made an appearance. he shooted you a text five minutes before the hour that was set, saying he was arriving soon and asking where you were.

y/n: i’m already here!

mr. loml: nice, i’m one block away.

y/n: okay! i’m sitting in the booth next to the big window.

you shivered, mixed feelings of being excited and already hating how he arrived just in time. you didn't know what you could expect from this blind date set up by the one and only bokuto koutarou, he said nothing about your date but mentioned how keiji was friends with a guy who had a twin, so you anticipated that maybe the twin mentioned was going to show up to the blind date. you shrugged, well, this was the last time you followed bokuto and akaashi’s words without asking anything else, that blind trust you had in them sometimes did you more wrong than right.

your eyes scanned the sidewalk in front of the coffee shop, waiting and feeling slightly anxious for someone to cross the street and suddenly appear in front of you. fidgeting with your fingers, you decided to concentrate on other things to soothe your nerves, thinking about how the coffee from the shop was excellent and akaashi told you only good things about it.

“hola?”

“excuse me?” you turned your head slowly to the voice by your side.

“are you my date?”

your jaw dropped, this man was hot, like, really hot.

“yes? i don't know, i guess?” atsumu raised an eyebrow, “which twin are you?”

he scoffed, “the better one.”

“uhm, okay.” this was an awkward start, “let’s order our drinks?”

he told you his coffee order and sat in front of you at the other side of the booth as you stood up and walked to the cashier.

atsumu watched you walk away from the table, staring at your ass for a few seconds. observing how you interacted with the barista taking the orders, how you smiled and made cute gestures with your hands when you talked, which by the way, looked very soft.

after you came back with the drinks and handed him his order you felt a little relieved, maybe now you could actually have a normal conversation and forget about that strange first interaction, first impressions weren’t that important… right? 

you discovered that this guy was called ‘atsumu’ and he didn’t talk very fondly about his twin, ‘osamu’. he had dirty blond hair and an undercut that suited him very well, besides, you couldn’t help but look at his shirt, this dude crearly knew how to show off his body, it was a little tight so you could actually see his abs.

he caught you staring at his body and smirked. “do you like what you’re seeing?” your gaze snapped from his lower stomach to his face, you could feel your cheeks getting red and hot. “i’m joking, i know you like it.”

this was another thing that you learned while talking to him, he was a little bit of an asshole. he loved talking about himself and teasing other people.

“yeah sure, you wish.” what he didn’t know was that you could also be like that when you wanted to.

“wow” atsumu was surprised that he was actually having fun on a blind date.

“what?”

“women are not funny.” you stared at him, shocked, and then proceeded to stab his hand with your plastic fork.

“it was a joke!” he rubbed his injured hand.

you chuckled, atsumu could be annoying at times, but you found that kind of charming in a way.

atsumu talked and talked about his time spent in highschool playing volleyball and how his twin brother was the most annoying person on the planet but he loved him anyway. you found yourself staring at him with heart eyes while he ranted on bizarre moments of his life and described the fight he had with his brother about hair colors so other people could distinguish them from each other. you tried to imagine atsumu with grey hair to get a picture of osamu in your head, feeling kind of dumb.

“osamu seems nice, can i meet him?” atsumu’s face suddenly changed and he looked annoyed.

“why?”

“he sounds like the better looking twin.” he gasped and put a hand on his chest dramatically, feeling slightly offended.

“he was the one who set me up with you, so i don’t think you have a chance with him.” he crossed his arms, looking away.

“i just wanted to meet him, not date him.” you snickered, seeing how his face turned pink but his face changed immediately to a cocky smirk.

“oh, so, you want to date me?”

“dude, we are on date right now.”

“nah, sorry, i don’t do dating” that took you for surprise, you blinked dumbfoundedly.

“then why are you here?”

atsumu went on a rant about his love life, how people always expected a lot from him when he dated, wanting him to commit immediately to a relationship when he just wanted to have fun. so, that lowkey sparked a fear of commitment when it came to dating, that's why every time he met a girl he tried to be as clear as possible, stating that he didn’t want to have a full-on relationship with her, it was just a one night stand after all. but the girls, god, the girls seemed to have a fixation on him, every morning after a hook-up the girl would always ask him for a date or more than that, so he ended up being known as a heartbreaker and an asshole to the female population. the whole time you were looking at his huge arms and didn't understand a thing… oops.

“...that's rough, buddy.” you couldn’t think about anything else to say, you didn’t sign up to give therapy to a stranger.

“were you even listening to me?”

“i tried at the beginning, but it was lowkey deep so…” he stared at you, dumbfoundedly, “what i did catch was some stuff about fear of commitment, so listen, i won’t pressure you to anything, i just want to have fun too.” you shrugged.

atsumu was speechless, but he tried to recover immediately and catch you off guard. “well then, your place or my place?”  

“mine.” you didn’t even skip a beat, this was a game for two.

he was the one caught off guard.

...

he got pegged.

atsumu couldn’t believe it either, he just found himself on all fours on your bed, watching expectantly how you, well, did your thing behind him. he did everything in his power to not show how much he was enjoying the whole experience, but you knew by the way he was shuddering.

“you can shower if you want.” you said lazily from the bed. “there’s a clean towel behind the door.”

he nodded and silently walked to the bathroom, with mixed feelings flowing through his chest. he thought your shampoo smelled really nice as he cleaned himself in the shower.

he stepped out of the shower and dressed himself, when he came out of the bathroom you were already with your clothes on preparing yourself a sandwich on the kitchen counter.

without looking at him you said, “well, it was nice meeting you, please say thanks to osamu for setting us up.” he stood there and blinked, not sure about what to do next.

he tried to compose himself, only thinking of how he was getting kicked out, “i can’t do that, it would get to his head and he would never shut up about how great he is.” you chuckled.

“yeah sure, you know where the door is.” you patted his shoulder on your way back to the bedroom, disappearing after closing the door.

he stood there for a few seconds, then left.

…

blond twin: so, when are you free again?

y/n: huh?

blond twin: y’know, for a second date?

y/n: HUH? i thought you didn’t do dating

y/n: maybe you want to get pegged again?

blond twin: shut up

blond twin: so? time and place?

#atsumu #atsumu miya #haikyuu atsumu miya #haikyuu #hq #haikyuu!! #atsumu x reader #atsumu miya x reader #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x female reader #my fics #collab

[dinosaurtsukki]

haikyuu!! characters as their zodiac signs (pt. 5)

whooo last part! if there are specific characters you guys want a zodiac sign analysis of my inbox is open!

kuroo - scorpio

tsukki's #1 reason for needing to have feelings are these scorpios right here

while yamaguchi is soft baby boy scorpio kuroo is basically daddy scorpio

if you constantly wonder why seeing him makes your mouth water its because of his intense energy

he is SUPER persuasive. very few people would say no to him 

calm, cool, and collected most of the time but get’s ticked off by people who know how to get under his skin

but this guy will hold grudges for years to the point that he vividly remembers how people wronged him

can probably read people like the palm of his hand 

the kinds of people he's attracted to are the ones who are super direct and honest 

also ones that kind of give him a challenge? if u know what i mean ;)

no one is clingier than he is. will literally whine and crawl into people's laps for attention 

he doesn’t look like he cries a lot but he cries on the inside while ‘liability’ by lorde is playing

someone tell him to stop wearing black because it’s Too Much

in conclusion: i think at this point its pretty clear that i ship with tsukishima for legal reasons

kenma - libra 

ohhh boy another libra

just thinking about libras makes me tired

but i find that in terms of personality he's pretty similar with tsukishima which is why i think they'd also be really great friends

kenma likes having things to fixate on and his mind is very active which is why he loves playing games so much

he prefers it when things have a formula or a pattern for him to follow so it would be easier for him to make decisions

he prefers not to rock the boat and let things be 

at the same time he's a very sharp thinker and like our other libras, whatever he says he truly believes in

and since he's very logical and observant, others would believe in what he says

he's motivational in his own way

the kind of person who thinks off good comebacks after an argument is over

blows on game cartridges even though he knows he’s Not Supposed To

although he's more introverted, he's very talkative around people he likes

in conclusion: tsukishima and kenma have a groupchat where they roast tf out of kuroo

yakulev - (leo × scorpio)

angeri boi duo 

both of them bicker constantly and since they have very strong personalities the bickering jus never ends

except for when either lev accidentally compliments yaku or when yaku gets lowkey attracted by how intense lev looks

lev is super fucking clingy and yaku will be a complete tsundere about how much he likes the attention

both of them are hella blunt and honest so no need to beat around the bush 

yaku is hella competitive and will pick fights for the sake of picking fights

at the same time he's extremely tenacious and will stop at nothing to win

he's also very self-conscious of how others see him except for his height since lev mentions it constantly that at this point yaku doesnt give a fuck about it anymore

lev on the other hand is also very competitive but its more of the 'i wanna score a shit ton of points all by myself'

like he doesn't compete against a person directly but he likes achieving a lot of things on his own

unlike yaku, he could care less about what people think of him 

both of them are pillow huggers and neither of them like to talk about That One Time they ended up cuddling each other in their sleep during a training camp

but kuroo has pictures of it on his phone

in conclusion: tbh fire and water sign couples are really intense and i want more yakulev hc's

bokuto - virgo 

okay so my theory is that his moon sign or rising is sagittarius so his virgo-ness isn't as apparent

but some of those virgo traits do shine through

for example his moodines when he's not able to get his spikes through are because he's very conscious of how he performs

he loves being recognized for his achievements 

at the same time he's either really proud of himself or questioning it 

• thanks to some fire or water sign placements he's not an eMOtIonAlLy rEpReSsed virgo

he's very stubborn but also very clear-headed when it comes to his goals

because of that he's such a hard worker but he never forgets to have fun with it

its very hard for him to let go of things, whether they're promises or grudges

he tends to focus more on the positive things though

he has such a great memory and he'll bring up the smallest, most minor details which would surprise everyone but also make them feel touched

he loves going all out during his friends' birthdays 

everyone wants to he his friend because they want a birthday surprise from bokuto

like yachi, he also has a lot of highlighters but that’s because he always borrows one but forgets to give it back so it kinda accumulated

he loves DIY-ing things but he’s not very good at them but still Very Proud

has made friendship bracelets for all of his teammates

in conclusion: validate him pls (akaashi)

akaashi - sagittarius 

he's a v e r y  t i r e d  sagittarius

most of his energy is spent taking care of bokuto and being the Best Setter He Can Be

he doesn't hate it though because seeing bokuto happy about his spikes is one more point for their team

he doesn't really express but he's super competitive but in a very sneaky way 

this boy is secretly very chaotic. like his braincell count goes down to one when he's alone

the kind of person who thinks pouring an energy drink into 6 shots of espresso is a good idea

its like groupthink but opposite because the bad decisions just come from him

once in a blue moon he'd agree with his friends' impulsive decisions for the sake of making memories

he really, really loves traveling, especially going to historical sites

takes the best selfies without even trying 

pretty much good at everything. at one point kuroo said that akaashi couldn’t possibly be good at singing on top of everything else and akaashi straight up mariah carey-ed him

only has one highlighter and it barely works

probably the scariest person next to takeda-sensei when he gets angry 

once snapped a pencil in two with his bare hand

in conclusion: idk keep him away from pencils ??

haikyuu!! characters as their zodiac signs series:  pt. 1, pt. 2, pt. 3, pt. 4, pt. 5

#haikyuu!! #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu!! characters as their zodiac signs pt. 5 #kuroo tetsurou #kozume kenma #yaku morisuke #haiba lev #bokuto koutarou #akaashi keiji #scorpio!kuroo #libra!kenma #leo!yaku #scorpio!lev #virgo!bokuto #sagitarrius!akaashi