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moonstruckme · 2 months

Note

Hey! I have a potentially odd request and I’m not sure if you write stuff like this anyway so if not please just disregard. I am in a strikingly similar situation Sirius with Regulus and for some reason this past week I’ve been feeling guilty as hell. Could you maybe do something where Remus and James are comforting Sirius like it’s okay, it’s not your fault, you had to leave, etc? Or maybe something with Remus James and Sirius comforting reader with the same idea but Sirius being especially emotional and like it’s okay, I get it, you can’t blame yourself etc? Thank you lovely <3 <3

Hi sweetheart! I wasn’t sure exactly which Siri+Reg situation you meant but my first thought was the one where Sirius left Reg alone in their parents’ home, so I hope that’s what you were intending. Thanks sm for requesting! It was a great excuse to listen to regina spektor’s two birds on repeat :’)

cw: implied past abuse, older sibling guilt (also I am a wee bit drunk editing this so if it’s bad let’s blame it on that)

poly!marauders x fem!reader ♡ 1.1k words

“I know,” you croak, and you’re speaking quietly enough that Remus gathers you aren’t eager to be overheard, but you’ve made no move to go upstairs and have a truly private conversation. You lie on your back on the couch, one hand covering your eyes and the other holding your phone to your ear. “Yeah, I know how they are. No, it sucks, I just—”

You press your lips together as the voice on the other end of the phone increases in volume. When it pauses, you hum. “Yeah, I get that. I think it’s a good idea. Just keep to yourself, if you can. It’ll be okay. I’ll try and—no, I know.” You swallow thickly. Remus’ heart heavies.

He sneaks a look at your boyfriends, both pretending to be busy whilst they eavesdrop. Sirius, just on the other end of the couch, has ceased typing on his laptop and is scrolling aimlessly back and forth on the same page. Meanwhile, James is stirring a pot of water on the stove that’s barely simmering. They look about as tense as Remus feels, Sirius most of all. They all know who you’re talking to. They can gauge the subject.

“I’m sorry.” Your voice dips, quiet and abashed. “I want to, I just—wait, don’t—”

You let the phone drop onto the couch, releasing a sigh as you bring your other hand to your face. They hung up.

There are a few seconds of fraught silence before James pipes up from the kitchen, “Everything alright, angel?”

You hum in affirmation, but the sound is pitchy and broken.

Sirius forgoes pretense. He closes his laptop, setting it aside. “What did they want?”

You take in a deep, shuddering breath. It’s not enough; your voice cracks anyway. “For me to come home,” you say, the last word a sob.

James switches the stove off, nearly jogging into the living room to be at your side.

“I’m sorry, dove,” Remus says quietly. “I know it must be hard, but you did the right thing by leaving.”

“I don’t think so,” you choke out. James makes a pained sound as he sits by your feet, between you and Sirius, and rubs his big hands up and down your calves consolingly. Remus sneaks a glance at Sirius, and his boyfriend has his jaw clamped tight, watching you with heartache in his pale eyes.

“You did,” James says. “Sweetheart, it’s not your fault.”

You shake your head, still hiding behind your hands. “I—I can’t—” You nearly lunge for James, who looks all too relieved to take you into his arms. He maneuvers you so you’re in his lap, sitting sideways with your face pressed against his collar. His palm covers the back of your head.

“Shh, it’s okay,” he hushes you, tone fraught with a compassion so intense it sounds like it hurts. “It’s okay. Just cry it out if you need to.”

You do. You cry until Remus is sure your head has to be pounding. You don’t try to breathe through it, don’t wipe your nose as it runs. Your tears come hot and fast and painfully quiet, like you learned how to hide them as soon as you learned how to cry. Sirius doesn’t tear his gaze from you as your shoulder’s shake and James’ shirt grows wet. When he swallows thickly, Remus reaches over from the armchair to take his hand.

Once your tears start to slow, Sirius says, voice uncharacteristically quiet, “The best thing you can do is give them the advice you wish someone had given you.” His free hand twitches in his lap, and Remus realizes he’s keeping still on purpose, not messing with his hair or crossing his arms or doing any of the things that would give away how upset he is. “You can’t go back.”

“I know,” you mumble into James’ shirt.

“Do you?” Remus asks gently. “I understand if you want to, right now, but you just…you have to do what’s best for yourself.”

A powerful sob shakes you, and James’ palm presses into your back with something akin to desperation. “I’m the big sister,” you say. “I’m supposed to be there for them.”

“You didn’t ask for that.” Sirius’ words are inlaid with a quiet ardency. “It’s not—you can’t blame yourself.”

You sniffle, pulling your face from James’ front to look at Sirius. There’s a rawness between you that hurts Remus to look at. “I know you know what it’s like,” you tell him, voice wavering on the edge of a whimper, “and I’m sorry. I just—” you take a ragged inhale “—didn’t think it would feel like this.”

James looks like he is just barely restraining himself from tucking your head back into his shoulder, but he holds still as Sirius pulls his hand from Remus’ to reach for you, pushing a damp piece of hair away from your eye.

“Baby, you don’t need to be sorry,” he promises. “I get it. It’s hard to feel okay about it at first, but you’ll…it gets easier.”

You nod, and even though it’s obvious to all of them that you’re only being a good sport, Sirius offers you a small smile.

“What made it easier?” you ask softly, swiping under your eyes. James coos and bushes your hands away gently, kissing your tears off for you.

Sirius looks between Remus and James, then shrugs. “I don’t know. Drinking, maybe.”

“Fuck off.” Remus sticks out a foot, pushing at Sirus’ thigh harshly. “Does she seem like she’s in the mood for jokes?”

But you laugh wetly, and they all grin for hearing it, James mushing a few quick kisses into the side of your head.

“Gonna turn our sweet girl into an alcoholic,” he says against your skin.

“Fine.” Sirius rolls his eyes extravagantly. “I don’t know, I guess you guys helped a bit too.”

Before Sirius can react, James has an arm around his neck, tugging him close. “Oh, you,” James says, and Sirius makes a horrified squawking sound as his boyfriend presses a firm kiss to his temple, then yours. “Such a romantic. We helped a bit, huh?”

Remus hums. “Ingrate.”

“The point,” Sirius says, wrestling free of James’ grip, “is that it does get better.” He looks at you, features softening. “It’s not that it’s ever easy. But give it time.”

“Got it.” You give him a small smile. Still wan, but more genuine than the last. “Thanks.”

“Do whatever you need to to feel better, sweetheart,” Remus tells you, leaning forward until you meet his eye. “Just stay with us, yeah? Don’t go anywhere.”

You lean into James’ side, the affection in your gaze all too heavy. “I could never.”

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oatsmeall · 3 months

Text

You and I?

Socially awkward!Jk! X f!reader | college AU

Warnings: Socially awkward jk, very awkward jk, suggestive themes, possible smut.

(人*´∀｀)｡*ﾟ+(人*´∀｀)｡*ﾟ+(人*´∀｀)｡*ﾟ+(人*´∀｀)

For as long as you've been coming to this course you've always seen this quiet guy, he always come in 5 minutes exactly before class starts, he brings the same black metal water bottle with one singular sticker, and he's always quiet but always raises his hand to answer questions. You didn't really pay much attention to him untill today specifically though, of course you noticed his usual quirks but today? Man, it's like he became a new man. You never thought the awkward nerdy guy would pull up to class late with new piercings. On his eyebrow and his lip. You were stunned to say the least, he's... Hot? This totally normal thing called being 'tardy' suddenly seamed like a sense of rebellion, especially for this guy, Jeon Jungkook. Wow, such a bad boy.

Throughout the week he'd show up less covered, usually he'd wear sweater vests with a neatly tucked shirt and black or brown slacks or occasionally jeans. Now he's been wearing oversized shirts and baggy sweats and jeans. And not to mention his entirely detailed sleeve on his arm, which has very much been in the works for quite the while you bet. Where was the cute nerdy boy you knew? This was a whole new man. Even the girls that never bat an eye started noticing. You weren't going to lie and say you weren't a little jealous. I mean come on? These girls were ignoring him just 2 weeks ago, now they're fawning over him and his new look.....

"STUDENT SETTLE DOWN PLEASE. today we'll be writing an essay about what we've learned this month. Please be sure to turn the essay in by Friday night." The professor was making y'all write an essay. This is so boring, you were just thinking about that comfortable bed of yours.

While digging in your backpack for your laptop and some paper, you couldn't find any sort of writing utensils. This was so annoying, how is it that Suddenly when you ACTUALLY need a pen or pencil you couldn't find one. Jesus Christ, what a unlucky way to start on homework.

"pssst, hey.. hey, ppsssst" you were trying to whisper call on Jungkook, he was not budging. "Jeon, hey" you were not getting anywhere. Suddenly he side eye looked at you. Okay?...

"what do you want, were supposed to get busy." He said monotoned, he really is still nerdy sounding.

"well I won't get anywhere near busy if you'd just hear me out for a bit. Do you have a pen or pencil I can borrow, please?" You're regretting asking. He's probably gonna decline and say 'you should've brought your own".

"hmm.. I do, but you have to give it back, I always keep 4 pencils exactly." Close to the response you thought.. kinda.

"ugh okay, thanks" ou! Fancy mechanical pencil! And it had a cool retractable eraser!

This essay was gonna kill you. come to think of it what did you even learn this month?....

You and Jungkook had became friends, this past month you slowly would talk to him or try to talk big conversations, you really found him interesting. He was like a new subject you were trying to learn about. You've learned he's quite....odd? He didn't get your jokes sometimes, he was unaware of social cues at times, and he was too straight up. You thought he didn't like you, he was so blunt. on a random day when you guys went to the library he commented on how messy your notes were, how your hair was messy and looked unprofessional for school, and even on how wearing Birkenstocks with socks was strange. He was nitpicking random things, things you wouldn't even pay attention to. This gave you a feeling of self awareness, you felt like he didn't like you, he was making you realize a lot of things you hadn't.

"Jungkook, I really like you but you've got to stop nitpicking things I don't even notice, I'm sure you can keep it to yourself? You don't hear me saying how the way you styled your hair today looks off from yesterday, or how you're wearing two different shades of black and I don't like that."

"why wouldn't you like it? I like it." He said confused and somewhat agitated.

You gave him a knowing look of "do you see now?"

He sat silently before asking

"do you really not like my two different shades of black?" There was a pause before you started giggling. He looked so confused, you couldn't help but giggle.

"alright. Wanna come by my dorm tonight? Study a little and maybe order takeout and watch a movie? Shrek perhaps?" You tried changing the conversation hoping he'd forget the little conflict.

This would be the first time you invite him to your dorm, you were too shy to ask, he was also shy though, more than you probably. You didn't want to make him uncomfortable.

"uhm..sure.. just send me you dorm number." He seemed shy just asking that, you were excited though. He was such a cute and smart guy, he was very helpful when studying. He taught you new things too, the other day he taught you about why pigeons don't know how to build nests.

Around 6:30 he texted you saying he's on his way to your dorm. You were SO nervous for no reason, you tried to tidy up around your room, and by tidy you mean deep cleaned. You've never seen such a clean room, you loved it though.

*Knock, knock, knock*

"Comiingggg" you walked to your door and opened it to Jungkook. In a black tee shirt and grey sweat pants.. you felt your hear beat faster. He looked so.. FINE.

"Hello Y/n, I didn't know what kind of drink you liked so I bought Gatorade, orange juice, and water. I hope you like.. these." He looked so genuine, you appreciate him for trying.

"oh wow! I like all. I wouldn't have minded your pick. Thanks though, come in. Make yourself comfortable." He came in and sat himself on your bed, he was looking around curiously. He was looking attentively, like he was gather information.

"sorry if you might not like the scent in my room, Im trying this mango air freshener out-"

"I like it. It's okay. So where are your notes and stuff, we can get started right now if you'd like, that way we can have more time to hangout..if you want."

This genuinely surprised you? He wanted to spend time with you? Your heart had a sudden rush.

"oh? O-okay, yeah. Uhm let me get my laptop." You hurriedly grabbed your bag, you bent down you're oblivious but your ass caught Jungkook's attention by accident. He stared.. he felt his blood rush down his pants.

"okay I've got my laptop!" You walked to your bed and plopped next to him.

His face was red. Visibly red actually.

"you okay?"

"y-yeah.." he looked away from you in embarrassment. Immediately onto his notes.

After a long hour and a half, you guys were done, you decided to order for delivery instead, Jungkook didn't want to go out anymore, you were tidying around your room, who new studying was messy.

"can't wait for that pasta, I'm hungry. Also hot, this hoodie is too warm" Jungkook look slightly, seeing you take your hoodie off made HIM hot.. his body tensed up. Your black halter top made your boobs look so good, he caught a glimpse of them before you turned to him.

"freeeee!" you said in a giggle.

He was respectful, of course.. but he still IS a man.... with male... tendencies.

"can I use your restroom, please? I need to wash my hands"

"why the restroom? I've got a small sink by the dresser." You pointed to the hidden sink.

"I have to use the restroom too." He said straight faced. He was trying to get away from you as fast as possible or else his print would be visible VERY quickly, maybe he shouldn't have worn grey sweats. Maybe two different shades of black wasn't bad after all like you said.

"okay, yea. It's that door right there." You're not sure why but you have a feeling you made Jungkook uncomfortable, what could you have possibly done.

*knock, knock, knock*

"ouuu pasta must be here. JUNGKOOK! PASTAS' HERE!" you got out of your bed and quickly answered the door. You're excited.

After some very awkward moments of eating and small talk you put on Shrek the movie, you guys were on your bed now. But you felt a sudden rush, you've been avoiding thinking about him but he's so fine. He's hot in this little ensemble he put together, the grey sweats made his print noticable. Your mouth felt dry all of the sudden. You felt and decided to lay down and drape your legs on his thighs. You felt his body tense up. This made you feel butterflies. It's almost like you had an ad advantage.

"uhm.. Y/n.. I- " you cut him off and looked up at him directly into his eyes. Oh those siren eyes of yours.. they're killing him. His eyes began to widen when he realized that you're now turned around facing his lap. More so his crotch.

"Kook.." you start innocently. "Have you ever been... Touched?" You said softly and quietly. You scared him. He can't comprehend how you'd gone from fun from "fun and nice, sweet and understandable" to "horny seduction demon" he's also never had physical Intimacy, only cute kisses and hugs. This was odd, he liked how he felt though. You gave him butterflies.

"N-no" you looked at him straight in his eyes again. This time you say up slightly and palmed his dick through his sweats. He let out an lewd quiet moan. Your pussy was pulsating from excitement.

"mm poor boy. Do you like when I touch you like this?" You say quietly. You began stroking the outline of his dick, then you pulled his sweats down following after, his boxers. His hard Dick sprung up. You were in awe at the largeness before your eyes. You didn't know what you expected.. but surely not this monster. The sayings are true. It's always the quiet and shy ones.

"auh.. fuck" he whispered lewdly. What a turn on.

"mhm? You like that kookie?"

Precum began to slowly ooze from out the tip. Red and sore from the friction being created from your hands. You started pacing faster, stokes becoming gradually faster.

"augh, f-fuck. I don't wanna c-"

You sunk you whole mouth on his cock. Filling your mouth with only half of his cock. You started deep thoating, harder and faster, the lewd noises becoming louder and messier. Chocking on his dick you took him like a champ.

"I'm not done with you babe." You say with saliva and cum dripping from your mouth. You're Cock drunk.

"Y-you're not?!" He seemed genuinely shocked.

You got up and sat on his lap, legs sitting on either side of his thighs. Your booty shorts rode more up your thighs.

You began to ride him. Fully clothed, you began riding, Jungkook instinctively grabbed your ass and pressed you down to create harder friction.

"mm- F-fuck. Oh my, Jungkook augh- you moaned loudly, your pussy was so wet and it was throbbing. Suddenly. Jungkook's switched. He became the lewd one. You never expected to hear something like this come out of his mouth..

"Yeah? You like that you fucking slut? You like seducing quite guys?" He said through his teeth in a hiss. Gripping your ass. Your so turned on at his sudden switch.

"mhm baby" you mewed.

"take the shorts off. Now" yes sir. Anything for Me. Jeon.

You got up off him and you did a little strip tease. It was better that what Jungkook visioned.

You slowly hopped back on him and you grabbed his cock and slowly sat on him. Man was he stretching you out. Nice and good.

"augh fuck Kook. You're so big" you said in a gasp. He just looked at you with a smirk. Man you loved every minute of this.

"that's right baby take me like a fucking champ" you sat on him completely but suddenly.. when you began riding, his speed increased, he began slamming into you.

"fuck, fuck, fuck, augh babe, you're hitting the spot" your moans were something straight out of a porn video.

"yeah? You like that? Look at me when I fuck you Y/n look at me." He said grabbing your face. Who is this man?! This isn't shy little Jungkook with the cute boba eyes?! This was Jeon Jungkook. The fucking man.

After what felt forever, you and Jungkook did some after care. He went and fetched you an after pill at the nearest pharmacy. Yes at 1 am.

You were beat. Inside and out. Literally. You felt numb, could hardly walk. Your pussy was sore. You can't count how many times he made you cum and squirt but he really overstimulated you. You're so ready for a part 2 of this.

The next day you went to class and sat with Jungkook. Suddenly he became shy again?! Two faced much?

Guys... Let me know if you want a part 2 lol, this is my first time writing a fanfic lol🥹

#jungkook angst #jungkook smut #jungkook x reader #jungkook #bts

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strang3lov3 · 11 months

Text

Everyday I'm Shufflin'

Joel Miller x Fem Reader

Summary: Joel is shocked, horrified, disgusted, and absolutely appalled to learn you, an adult, cannot shuffle a deck of cards. He makes it his mission to teach you in a rather unconventional way 😈🔥😍

Warnings: 18+ MDNI! Smutttt, kind of soft dom! Joel (y’all know the fuckin drill, but this is like the softest soft dom), oral sex (m and f receiving), fingering, undefined age gap, unprotected PIV sex, Joel is a sweetie honestly, loosely proofread bc I was so excited to get it out to you guys.

Word Count: 6k (oops)

A/N: Dumb title I know…but listen. I know I’m touching on this particular theme/idea of card shuffling in my story Sweetest Perfection (which I’m unsure of when I will finish lol) but omg ladies…I was playing Gin Rummy with my man a few nights ago and he tried to teach me how to shuffle a deck of cards. I have never been so turned on watching him do something so simple. His hands were so skillful, his voice was so smooth and comforting. So thank you J ❤️ I love you!! (If he ever finds my writing I will drive off a fucking cliff)

if you enjoy this story, please leave me a comment! I am super proud of this story!

Check out my Masterlist

How you learned to shuffle a deck of cards was rather…unorthodox. To say the least.

It started with a game of Gin Rummy.

Joel read once long ago that when shuffling a deck of cards, it is statistically more than likely that the particular order of shuffled cards never existed before and will never exist again.

Joel had played enough games of Solitaire by himself and shuffled enough cards over the past twenty-odd years that he was sure he beat that statistic. What else is there to do when you’re bored as shit in the apocalypse?

It was safe to say Joel was more than sick of Solitaire. So one morning at breakfast, he invited you to join him for a few games of cards. Nothin’ fancy, he said.

You said yes, of course. Joel Miller was distant, reserved. Standoffish, even. But he seemed to have a soft spot for you.

He noticed you sitting alone at dinner about a year and a half ago. He was alone too, Ellie usually ate with Dina. She was too cool for him, he guessed. You looked quite a few years younger than him and looked bored and lonely, nudging and poking at the food on your plate. It made him feel sad.

The next day, you were alone again. And the day after. And the day after that. On day five when he found you sitting alone, he decided to make his move. Instead of going to his usual spot at the end of the banquet tables, he sat across from you.

You looked at him with your eyebrows raised in confusion. “Can I help you?”

He didn’t think it through. He had no idea what to say, no idea how to make conversation. How to explain why he was sitting there. “I just, uh. My juvenile delinquent ditched me. Just wanted some company. I’m sorry, this was dumb,” his voice was gruff and low as he reached for his plate and began to stand up. “I’ll leave ya alone.”

“No, no. Stay,” you corrected yourself. “I didn’t mean to come off rude or anything, you just surprised me. Joel, right? Tommy’s brother?”

He nodded yes. You gave him your name and held out your hand. “Nice to meet you, Joel,”

“You as well, darlin’,” he took your hand in his and gave it a firm shake. His hand was warm and calloused.

And that’s how it started. You hit it off completely. Conversation was slow and awkward at first, but eventually it began to flow naturally. Joel was older, but the type of person you could talk to for hours. Like when you talk about your favorite food or movie and hours later you’re laughing about something random and obscure, and you wonder to yourself how you even ended up on that subject. You met for breakfast and dinner every day.

“So I’ve got a proposal for you, darlin’,” he said, taking a bite of his buttered toast.

“Pray tell, Mr. Miller!” you requested, a curious tone in your voice.

“I’m sick of solitaire. Been playin’ it every damn day for too long now. Come over for cards tonight?”

You paused, pressing your lips in a thin line. Card games weren’t really your thing. You remember Tommy and Maria and how they tried to teach you euchre a while back. It didn’t end well, you left with a migraine and no understanding of how to play euchre. But there were a few games you enjoyed. “Depends. It’s not euchre, is it?”

“Nope. That’s four players, sweetheart,” he informed.

“Poker? Because I don’t know that one either,”

Joel rolled his eyes. He’d have to teach you that one sometime. “No, not poker,” he chuckled when you let out a sigh of relief. “Tell you what, we’ll do any game you want. I’m just sick of playin’ with myself,'' Joel balked, then winced at his poor word choice. He absolutely did not mean to say that.

Your eyes widened in amusement at his silly word mishap. Now that must be a sight for sore eyes, Joel playing with himself. You tried to push the image out of your mind, but it was nearly impossible. You spent many nights with your hand between your thighs, picturing Joel naked and moaning on top of you. Or under you. Or behind you. Sometimes all three. The truth was, you needed Joel badly. Like, desperately. “Tired of playing with yourself, huh?” you teased with a smile and a playful glint in your eyes.

Joel pouted, the slightest tint of rosiness blooming on his cheeks. You idiot, he scolded himself silently. “Shut up, smartass. Are you comin’ over or not?”

“Duh. Ellie gonna be there?”

“Probably not. It’ll be just us, most likely. Is that alright?”

“Yeah, of course,” you smiled. Finally, real alone time with Joel. Maybe tonight you could make your move. You hoped that Joel thought about you too. You caught his lingering stares, picked up on his cautious flirting. He could be so sweet and so charming, it had to be because he liked you too, right? But he was from Texas, so maybe it was just his southern gentlemanliness. Either way, it was worth a shot.

“Let’s meet here for dinner like usual, and then we can go over to my place. That work?”

You smiled and nodded, trying to keep cool. Excitement was bubbling in the pit of your stomach.

“Then it’s a date,”

A date!!

After breakfast, you went home and spent most of the day picking out a cute outfit for the evening. You went through nearly every piece of clothing in your possession, eventually settling for your favorite pair of jeans, a tank top, and a zip up hoodie. Casual.

Dinner came and went as normal. Joel was dressed as his usual self. A dark red flannel and some jeans that hugged his ass a little too nicely. You shared a good conversation, and when you finished eating, Joel took your dishes away and then met you at the door.

You walked side by side until you got to his home. It was cozy and inviting, Ellie’s drawings displayed prominently on the walls. Little tchotchkes and knick knacks here and there. A few old pictures, old books and magazines. His weathered deck of Bicycle playing cards sat in the middle of the dining room table.

Joel pulled out a seat for you and brought you a glass of water. He sat right next to you on the other side of the table. “So,” he started, reaching for the deck. He split the cards in two, braced his fingers along their sides and ran his thumbs from bottom to top. The cards fell in a swift and staggering motion. Effortlessly, he brought the cards up and bent them into an arch, letting them fall. “What card game we playin?”

“I was thinking we could play Gin Rummy?” you asked sweetly.

“Good choice,” he replied. He had some other games in mind, but couldn’t say no to your request. Joel dealt the cards expertly, quickly placing ten cards each in front of yourselves. The thwap thwap thwap of the cards hitting the table was such a pleasant noise. You loved how skillfully he moved his hands.

You brought your cards to yourself, doing your best to sort them into different groups. Unfortunately, Joel gave you the shittiest hand he possibly could have. This would be a swift game, you assumed. Joel snickered when he sorted his cards. By the looks of it, he already had the beginnings of a few good sets and melds. “Gonna kick your ass, darlin’,”

You grumbled in response. Joel flipped the first card up, motioning for you to make your choice. You couldn’t do much with it, so you passed. Joel took it, then discarded one of his own. You were right. The game went by quickly. Within minutes of playing, Joel showed you his hand. He had, in fact, kicked your ass. He was smiling and giggling and bragging, almost how a child would. You loved the way his eyes sparkled and the crinkles that framed them just so. He was too handsome for his own good.

He took your cards and placed them neatly in with the rest of the deck, then placed the deck in front of you. “Your turn to deal. We’re playin’ again,”

“Good. It’s about time I deal. You gave me the crappiest hand you possibly could’ve!” you laughed.

“Yeah, yeah. I purposely gave you a shitty hand because I need to rig the game in order to win. Or maybe I’m just better than you,” he taunted with a smile. He could be such a sarcastic prick at times. You rolled your eyes in response and Joel pointed to the cards. “Deal for me now, sweetheart.”

This is when all hell broke loose.

You took the cards in your hand, doing an awkward shuffle. Moving some cards sporadically here and there and mixing them on the table. It wasn’t the prettiest way to shuffle cards, but it worked. Right?

No, not right. Not according to Joel.

His jaw dropped, eyes squinted and his brow furrowed. He is completely and utterly appalled. Disgusted. Horrified. Offended. “What the fuck is the matter with you? What are you doing to my cards?!”

You stopped your actions. “What?” you asked worriedly.

“My cards! That’s how you’re shufflin’ them? Is this some kind of joke?” his southern accent intensified with his anger.

You looked down at his cards. None were bent or damaged in any way. “Joel, it’s fine,” you chided. “You’re so dramatic.”

“No, it is not fine. You mean to tell me this is how you shuffle cards?”

“Yeah, so?” Joel scoffed. “Unacceptable,” he takes the cards from you, huffing and puffing as he sorts them into a neat stack. “You’re an adult. Do it the right way.”

You give it your best shot. Trying to picture the way he shuffled, you mimic his finger placement and drop the cards, sliding your thumbs along the top edges. They don’t stagger nicely, however. They kind of plop on top of each other in groups.

Joel sighs in disappointment. He takes them from you in a sharp motion. “Give me those,” he grumbles. “You don’t know how to shuffle?” You shake your head no. “Gonna teach you, then.”

He splits the deck in two, then faces the cards so they’re mirroring each other, just like before. “Like this, darlin’,” he starts. “You place your pinkie, middle, and ring fingers at the far end. Pointer is bent at the knuckle on top, thumbs at the close end,” He shows you his hand placement, turning the cards so you can see all angles. “See?”

Joel is rambling about hand placement and how to move your thumbs. But you can’t help it. You’re practically salivating watching him move his fingers so skillfully. As he’s explaining how to slide your thumbs slowly up the cards, you’re picturing his thumb on your hot center, slowly sliding up your folds.

“You try now,” he sets the deck down in front of you.

Shit. You can’t remember a thing about what he told you. He helps you move your fingers properly and you freeze, your brain is short circuiting. His fingers are pure electricity on top of yours.

You take a breath and try again. Somehow, it’s worse than before.

“No, like this,” Joel takes the cards and begins rambling about the cards again. Now you’re watching his middle three fingers, wondering how they would feel inside you. How would they stretch you, how would they move? He’s so fucking good at this. It turns you on.

Joel says something, but you don’t answer. He looks at you, noticing your glazed eyes. You’re on another planet. “Are you even listening to me?” “What?” he breaks your trance. You meet his eyes, his eyebrows are raised and he looks rather irritated with you. “Yeah, yeah. Sorry,” you smile sheepishly.

“What’d I say?”

“You said,” you begin, trailing off when you can’t think of a good lie. He caught you, you weren’t listening at all. You couldn’t repeat a single one of his instructions.

“I’m sorry, am I boring you?” Joel’s words are bitter and he feels upset. He thought this would be a nice way to spend some alone time with you, and you couldn’t give less of a shit about tonight. It’s jarring, he didn’t expect this from you and it stings him.

“No! Of course not, Joel. I’m sorry,” Oops. Probably shouldn’t have been fantasizing about what his fingers could do to you. Rookie mistake, that’s the first rule of learning to shuffle a deck of cards! Never fantasize about your teacher’s fingers!

“Then what is it?”

You hem and haw, rattling off whatever you can think of to answer him. He’s not satisfied and you can see it. His brow is flat and he wears a frown of disappointment.

“Quit lyin’. If you’re bored, just say so. Won’t hurt my feelings,” Lies. Joel’s heart is crumbling at the thought of you being bored of game night. He’d actually been planning on inviting you for a while, and finally gathered the courage today.

“I’m having fun with you,” you stammer for a second, “I promise.”

“Yeah. Seems like it,”

You groan and bury your head in your hands. There’s no way out of this. You have to tell him what’s really going on. “Fine, Joel. You want the truth?”

“Yes, I do. Enlighten me,” he deadpans.

“Fine,” you inhale and close your eyes, mentally preparing for the humiliation you’re about to inflict upon yourself. “Your fingers. Your hands. The way you move, the way you’re so good at this. It’s sexy, okay? I can’t fucking focus.”

Joel’s in disbelief that he heard you correctly. When the words finally register, a smirk curls up on his lips. He feels a little guilty for accusing you of not caring. But then again, he never would have thought shuffling cards would be a turn on for a woman. Poor thing, he thinks. You’re not bored, you’re just hot and bothered. It’s no wonder you can’t focus. “You think I’m sexy?”

You stare at the cards, avoiding his stare. God, this is embarrassing. “Yeah, of course,”

“Of course, huh?” he taunts you with a shit eating grin. “My fingers are gettin’ you all worked up, is that right?”

You finally build the courage to look up. There’s no animosity or malice in his gaze, just amusement. Your confidence is beginning to return. “That’s right,” you reply with a whisper.

“Wow. My fingers gettin’ you all hot and bothered and I’ve never even touched you,” he teases. “That’s what’s goin’ on in that pretty head of yours? You’re thinkin’ about me touchin’ you?”

You nod. “How could I not? I always do,”

“Oh darlin’, how you flatter me,” He pauses, thinking. Joel gets a twisted idea then, and places the cards in front of you. “Tell you what, sweet thing. You shuffle those cards real nice for me, I’ll use my fingers on you. You’d like that, wouldn’t you?”

“Yes Joel, please,” you rasp out. You took the scenic route to get there, but the night is finally headed in the direction you had hoped for.

Joel makes it look so easy. Just focus a little harder, and you’ll do it. You split the deck in two, mirror the cards, place your fingers properly, and–

Plop plop. Plop.

The deck splits in large chunks with a few single cards falling near the end. You exhale in frustration.

“Come on now, sweetheart. You want me to touch you, right?” Joel’s wearing a twisted smirk, so smug and cocky. “What’re you screwin’ around for?”

Joel loves teasing his partners, he loves building up tension so palpable that it could be sliced with a knife.

You glare at him. You’ll show him. It can’t be that fucking hard to shuffle a damn deck of cards. You repeat the shuffling motion, failing again.

You grunt at the deck of cards, wishing you could make them burst into flames. You try again, and fail. Yet again.

You try again. Fail.

And again. Fail.

Focusing is becoming increasingly difficult with the throbbing growing stronger at the apex of your thighs.

You huff indignantly, slamming the cards on the table. “Fuck this,”

“Hey, now. If you’d’ve just listened to me you’d get it right by now,” Joel steps out of his chair and hovers behind you, then motions for you to begin again. He places his hands over yours, separating them a little. “Hands are too close together, darlin’. That’s why the cards aren’t falling right. Now try.”

You steady your breath, focusing on the cards. You slide your thumbs up the edges slowly and watch the cards stagger perfectly. The pitter patter of each card hitting the other is the most beautiful and relieving sound you’ve ever heard. You gasp, amazed that you finally did it.

Joel opens his mouth to praise you, but you interrupt him by practically leaping out of your chair and into his arms. Without thinking, you grab his face and press your lips to his, kissing him hard and fast. Your lips slide sloppily against his and your teeth click together every so often.

Your hands leave his face and furiously unbutton your jeans and you grab his hand, shoving it down the front of your pants. You moan when his fingers reach your center.

Joel’s instinct is to tease you some more, but you’ve done that to yourself enough already. It’s evident by the river flowing between your thighs. You gasp when drags his middle and ring fingers up and down your seam.

“You poor thing,” he whispers into your lips. “Fuckin’ needed this, hm?”

You don’t answer him, you can’t. You just whimper into his mouth. His strong nose presses against your cheek and his lips are soft against yours. His calloused fingers paint steady circles against your clit and his other arm is around your waist, holding you tightly against him. He can feel your knees beginning to buckle and he relishes in the way you’re unraveling, just for him.

He parts from you and removes his hand from your pussy. You let out a cry of frustration at the loss. “I know, darlin’,” he sympathizes.

He sits on his chair and pulls you close to him by your hips, then tugs your jeans down your thighs. He motions for you to take them off the rest of the way and then guides you to sit in his lap, your back flush against his chest. He pushes his hand down the front of your panties and returns it to your pussy, circling your clit once more before pushing two fingers inside your wet heat, curling upwards and hitting the spot that makes your thighs tremble. His hot breath tickles your ear and sends a shiver down your spine. “Did so good, baby. So good for me,”

A strangled moan gets caught in your throat. His fingers feel incredible, stretching you out and pressing into you.

He loves the wet squelching sound of your pussy, he loves the way your head is resting on his shoulder, your lips pressing into his neck as you whimper sweet nothings into his skin. His other arm is wrapped tight around your body and he squeezes your breasts in his big hand, pinching and twisting your pebbled nipples. “God, you don’t take much at all do you? So sensitive, just for me,”

His cock is hard beneath you, poking through his jeans and into your back. He desperately wants to be touched, wants to take this further and fuck you hard and deep. But not yet.

“Joel, I want more now,” you whine, feeling heat deep in the pit of your stomach.

“You want to come now, sweetheart? Come all over my fingers?” he nudges your thighs farther apart and you open up deeper for him. He removes his hand from your breasts and trails it down your body, beginning gentle circles on your clit while the fingers on his other hand continue curling into you.

“Please,” you cry. You’re so noisy, he’s thankful you’re screaming into his bad ear.

“‘Course, baby. You can let go. It’s okay,” he coos. If only you could see his devilish smirk and know what twisted idea he’s conjuring up in his head.

With his permission, you let yourself go. Your face and chest flush and your muscles squeeze around his fingers erratically. “Fuck, fuck, Joel,” you moan. Joel continues his work on your pussy as you ride out your high. It’s a delicate orgasm, soft and gentle. It feels wonderful, but you need more.

With shallow breaths, you compose yourself and turn to face him. You press kisses to his lips and his jaw and down his throat. Then, on your knees, you reach for his belt buckle.

“What d'ya think you’re doin’, sweetheart?” he questioned you, his voice taunting and playful. He grabs your hands and holds them tightly to stop you.

“What do you mean? I’m going down on you,” you reply, baffled by his question. “Then we’re gonna fuck.”

“Ah, ah,” he tuts. “No we’re not.”

“We’re not?”

“No. I never said I’d fuck you. I told you I’d use my fingers on you,” Of course, he knew you thought this would go farther. But Joel revels in teasing a woman, making her beg and cry for him before finally giving in.

You scoff in disdain. “But I wanted more,” you complain.

“I know you did, baby. If you want my cock, you have to work for it. You didn’t shuffle the cards right,” he tells you plainly, as if it was so obvious. “Shuffle the cards right and I’ll fuck you.”

You raise your eyebrows. “Yes, I did. You watched me,”

“I did watch you, and you didn’t do it right. Have to finish with the bridge fall, sweetheart. Or else you’ll bend my cards and I’ll be real upset with you,” he explains, feigning sympathy for you. “I’d have to punish you. And you really don’t want that, baby. So why don’t you be a good girl now, shuffle those cards the right way so I can fuck you real nice, just how you wanted.” his voice is dark and low and serious, you love the gravelly rumble coming from deep in his chest. “Do that for me?”

You love the threat. One day you’ll have to bend his cards, just to see what he’d do to you. But you have bigger concerns at the present moment.

You take a step back to your seat and sit, the cold wood of your chair is refreshing on the hot and sweaty skin of your thighs. You grab the deck, separate it, and take a deep breath in and let it out. You move your hands apart just a touch, just as Joel instructed earlier. And you let the cards fall into place.

With your hands now holding the shuffled cards, you try your best to maneuver them into falling into place. It doesn’t go as planned, the cards flop backwards and scatter all over the table.

Joel bites back a smile, a teasing glint in his eyes. “Havin’ trouble?”

“No. I can do it,”

You try again. Split the deck, run your thumbs up the edge of the cards and–

The cards fall in chunky groups, not quite the elegant shuffle Joel was looking for. Oops. Fucked that one up. Not to worry, you’ll just try again.

This time you shuffle correctly, attempt the bridge fall once more and fail. Again. You hear the clink of Joel’s belt buckle fall and watch him unzip his pants and pull out his cock. It’s hard and the tip is blushed as he begins to stroke himself. “Better get it together, darlin’. I’m gettin’ tired of waiting on you,”

You glare at him silently.

You steady yourself and try again. And fail. Fucking again. Joel lets out a low whistle and spits into his hand, then brings it to his cock again. His fist is moving up and down his shaft and he shrugs at you, as if to say ‘Sorry, sweetheart. Can’t help it’. This is a delightfully unique change of pace, he thinks. He’s not doing a thing to work you up, your pleasure and release is all dependent on yourself alone.

Alright. Once more, this time with feeling.

Fail.

You try and try and try again, failing each time. Your fingers are exhausted and your palms are sweaty, causing you to slip up. And Joel’s sitting there, playing with his cock and not saying a thing. You’re so beyond irritated, completely tired of this torturous bullshit. Tears of frustration well in your eyes and spill out and down your cheeks. This is fucking agonizing. You ignore your tears, hoping that if you don’t acknowledge them Joel won’t either. You try again. Nothing. You let out a cry in dissatisfaction.

“I know, baby. You’re tryin’ so hard,” Joel whispered earnestly. You just let out a dry laugh. “You are,” he continued. “Take a deep breath, focus for me. You got it.”

You shuffle the cards, set up the arch. “Easy, now. Lift up one thumb, let the cards fall. You can do it, baby,”

You do as you’re told, lifting up your left thumb slowly. You can’t believe your eyes as you watch the spill neatly into each other. Fucking finally.

You drop the cards and let them scatter slightly on the table. In a rush, you leap to Joel and drop to your knees, not even caring about the way the hard floor makes your knees ache. You swat his hand away from his cock and part your lips over the tip, feeling him slide past your tongue and down your throat.

In your fantasies, you’d tease him with your tongue a little. Make him want you, need you. But not here, not now. You’re hungry for his cock and want to waste no time with him. You savor the way his cock feels so smooth and soft in your mouth, the slightly salty flavor of his skin. It’s all so…Joel.

Even Joel was surprised by how eager you were. He gasped when you took him into his mouth, but quickly relaxed as you began your pace. You gripped his denim clad thigh in one hand and brought the other to the base of his length, twisting and pumping it as you bobbed your head. You hummed and moaned against him.

“Wow, darlin’. Someone’s excited,” he mumbles.

You look at him with big doe eyes and offer a wink in response. Joel lets you continue for a while more. He loves how enthusiastic you are, sucking and stroking him like it’s all you’ve ever wanted to do. It brings him close to the edge.

He taps your cheek a couple times, encouraging you to hop off of him. Your lips are puffy and red, spit dribbling down your chin. He grabs you by your arms and shoves you against the table, then pushes the cards out of the way. You watch and giggle as they clatter on the ground in a big mess. He was so protective of those same cards before, so offended at how you touched them. Now they sat in disarray on the ground. “Your cards,” you breathed with concern.

“Don’t care,” he mumbled, pulling your panties down your thighs and pushing your back onto the table. He knelt before you and draped your legs over his shoulders, loving the way they weighed him down. “Let me taste you, please,” he rasped out. You nodded hurriedly. Joel wasted no time, hungrily licking and kissing your folds. He lapped at you, pressed his tongue flat against your center and dragged it over your sensitive skin. He loved how you tasted, how you made a mess of his mustache and his beard. He pointed his tongue and flicked at your clit as he brought two fingers to your core, scissoring and twisting and stretching you out.

It felt amazing, so intense and pleasurable. But you had been waiting so long for his cock already and it’s all you could think about. You pushed Joel away from your body and tore off the rest of your clothes as he followed suit. He looked gorgeous, tan skin and oh so smooth. He wasn’t very hairy, you noticed. Just a tuft of coarse hair at the base of his cock and a little happy trail leading down to it. His muscles were soft and lightly defined, you loved the little swell of his tummy. “You’re beautiful,” you whispered. “Need you to fuck me now.”

Joel cocked his head slightly at your compliment. No one had ever called him beautiful before. You were such a genuinely lovely person. He smiled sweetly at you before kissing you, closing the gap between your nude bodies. “You’re so fucking gorgeous, baby. Wish I told you earlier,” he purred. “I’ll fuck you now. You did so good, baby. So proud of you.”

With that, Joel lined his hard cock up to your soaked entrance and pushed inside. Slowly, being sure not to go too hard or too fast. He watched your face, the way your eyes fell shut and your mouth dropped open. He stopped once he was about halfway inside of you. “How am I doin’, darlin’?”

“Please fuck me,” you begged. You appreciated his gentle care, how he wanted to make sure you were comfortable. You’d expect nothing less than the illustrious southern gentleman. But you’ve been waiting long enough with the prospect of being fucked by Joel Miller. Fuck sweet lovings, you needed to be fucked. To be used, like a toy. “Now.” you demanded.

It’s all the permission Joel needed. He slammed his hips into yours and you wrapped your arms around his shoulders, gripping his tight muscles. Your hands wandered down his back and settled on his ass. You squeezed the soft flesh beneath your fingers and let out moan after moan.

Joel loved how vocal you were. Telling him what you needed, how you needed it. He loved the pretty noises you made, all for him. No one else. Not anymore, at least. You were his now and would be forever.

“Fuck, Joel,” you panted between breaths. “Feels so good.” Joel’s head dipped down to your chest and he kissed and nipped at the soft skin of your breasts, tonguing your nipples and loving how you shuddered at his touch. “Good, baby,” he said. “You deserve it.”

You did deserve it, after all. He made you work like a fucking dog for it.

Joel fucked you at a steady pace, comfortable for both of you. He asked you what felt good, what you needed. How he could make it better. “Tell me what I can do, sweetheart,”

There were no improvements to be made. Everything about Joel was second to none, his cock, the way he moved, the way he held you. He fucked you perfectly, just how you needed. “Nothing, just,” you squinted your eyes shut and searched your brain for words, finding it difficult to piece any together. “Just keep fucking me like this. Maybe a little harder, please.”

Joel was a provider. A lady as beautiful as yourself, asking for more? It’d be a sin to deprive you of what you needed. So Joel obliged, picking up the pace and hitting you deeper. “Just like that, Jesus, fuck. Just like that, baby.”

Baby. Joel loved that term of endearment. He wasn’t used to being called any sweet nicknames, usually he was the one who’d dole them out. Not just to anyone, only to those closest to himself. It’s why he called you ‘sweetheart’ and ‘darling’ so often.

He liked being the object of your affection. “Keep callin’ me that, please,” he requested, his voice shy and low. He was so tough and domineering just moments ago, and now he was bashful and vulnerable, all because of one little word. Baby.

“Fuck, baby. You feel so good. Wanted this for so long,” you whimpered, holding onto him tightly. You’d abandon his name completely and call him ‘baby’ for the rest of your lives, if he asked you to.

“God, sweetheart. Me too,” he grunted.

Joel couldn’t last much longer. He let out groans and strangled out moans as his pace became sloppy. “Let me make you come,” he begged. He wriggled his hand between your bodies, placing his thumb on your clit. He held a firm pressure to the sensitive bud and moved it in concise circles, pushing you closer and closer to your release.

You let out a throaty moan as you felt your climax begin to bubble up inside you. “Don’t stop, don’t stop,” you pleaded. “I’m right there.”

Joel just kept doing what he was doing. Circles on your clit and fucking you deep, hitting that sweet spot deep inside you. Your moans turned frantic and you cried out his name, over and over again, like a prayer. Your orgasm was much more intense than the last one, it sent electricity all through your body. You felt tingles and sparks wash over you, from your scalp all through your fingertips, down all the way to your toes. It was the best orgasm any lover of yours had ever blessed you with.

Joel felt your body shudder around him, felt your pussy convulse and squeeze his cock. His thrusts became harder, faster, and frenzied as he chased his own climax. You watched his eyes screw shut and little drops of sweat fall down his temples as he let out a deep moan. His cock pulsed inside you, painting you with his hot seed.

He let out a laugh then, between panting breaths. He pulled you in for a hug, his skin hot and slick with sweat. Head pressed to his heaving chest, you could feel his heartbeat in your ear. Your new favorite feeling.

Joel pulled away from you, kissed you sweetly and helped you clean up. You pulled on your clothes and sat neatly at the table, picking up and sorting out the disheveled cards. Joel did the same, he bent down next to you and gathered the cards on the ground.

He placed them in front of you, left for a second with your empty glasses, and returned with the glasses of water refilled before sitting in his seat again. How you didn’t knock them over during your fucking, you had no idea.

“Alright, baby. Show me how you shuffle now,” he grinned at you. He wanted to make sure his unorthodox method of teaching you actually worked.

You smiled back, split the deck in two and mirrored them for the nth time that evening, and then placed your fingers along the two decks. You slid your thumbs up the cards, watched one fall on top of the other, and brought the cards back up into a nice arch. With a breath, you let off one thumb and let the cards fall down slowly. You sighed in relief. Your maneuver wasn’t quite as smooth as Joel’s, but there was plenty of time to practice.

You dealt out ten cards each, gathered your hand and did your best to hide a smirk. You held a three, four, and six of clubs, three kings, and two jacks.

Joel sighs disappointedly at his hand. You couldn’t have dealt him worse cards. Nothing went with anything.

The two of you exchanged cards quietly, as if you didn’t just desecrate Joel’s dining room table. It was quite funny, really.

The game was quick, just like before. You placed your sets and melds in front of him. “Read it and weep,” you jeer.

Joel grumbles something about cheating and steals your cards. “Rematch,” he says. “Loser gives the winner head.”

“Deal,”

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#joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller smut #the last of us #strang3lov3 #joel miller #the last of us hbo #pedro pascal #pedro pascal x reader #tlou #joel tlou #tlou show #tlou hbo

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thatfreshi · 8 months

Text

Forever and Ever (Astarion x Reader)

I'm going to sob and throw up everywhere this was so incredibly sweet.

Tw - mention of scars (i think that's it)

Recommended Song: Ronson Princess - Clarence James

Waking up to the sunlight gleaming through the red fabric, you and Astarion wrapped in each other's arms. It's odd for you to wake up before him, especially since he doesn't have to sleep all that much, but he's been particularly stressed the past couple of days. Baldur's Gate has brought up a lot of unpleasant memories, things he would've rather left behind. But sadly, everything has brought you back here, and he still wants Cazador dead. Perhaps that's what's weighing on him so heavily, knowing facing his master is so close.

You stare at his sleeping face for a long while, letting the sun continue trickling in, knowing soon he won't get this, soon that freedom of being in the sun, it'll be taken from him, just like everything else. Today you've prepared very special plans, kindly getting everyone to leave camp for the day. Before things change drastically, you want him to have something nice, a day without fighting, a day without talking about Cazador, a day without walking past taverns that he'd rather forget. You continue to smile at him, as his eyelids slowly flicker open. He smirks.

"I can practically hear you staring at me you know."

"Well good, at least you know how gorgeous I think you are."

You leave a kiss on his nose. Locking his fingers into yours, you start tracing his knuckles, all the little lines, tiny scars from fights, the callouses on his palm. He'd deny that he had them to anyone else.

"So... I have a surprise for you."

His ears perk up.

"Oh really? Whatever did I do to deserve such a thing?"

"You know I've said this a million times, but you don't have to do anything to deserve a gift my love. I just know you've been really stressed since we got back in the city, so I thought it would be nice if we had a day away from everything, just to ourselves."

"As if we could ever get time to ourselves with our hooligan friends."

You grin.

"That's the best part, I got them all to go do something else today, so we have the entire camp to ourselves!"

You feel a little bad, being so excited that your friends are leaving you alone, but Astarion likes the quiet. Sure, he's a performer, making little quips in a crowd, but it's that solitude, especially with you, that he cherishes. Maybe he was Stockholmed into it, being forced to be alone so often, but it was usually better than dealing with his 'siblings,' or Cazador. At least rats can't cut you up when they feel like having a good time.

"You seriously kicked out all of our friends so we could be alone for the day? However did you manage that?"

"I may have put some of your manipulation tactics to use..."

Last night, you just so happened to make an off-handed comment about something that would interest each of them. It wasn't too hard, especially since everyone in your group is obsessive over one subject at least, if not more. One by one, they decided they'd spend the day checking out something in the city.

"I have never been more in love with you."

You lock lips, running your hands through his hair, realizing that quite uncharacteristically, he hasn't washed it in days. He's usually quite ritualistic with his appearance, no doubt due to how he always had to look perfect. The habits simply stuck around, but he doesn't mind all that much.

"So, I have a whole day of activities planned!"

He sighs, thinking you mean some intensive itinerary.

"Okay maybe not activities, but nice little calming things to do. I call it... self-care day."

You look way too proud of yourself, and Astarion makes it known.

"What, dear gods, is self-care day? I am all for caring about yourself, as I am spectacular, but an entire day?"

"Yes. It's supposed to be overkill. Just a whole day of absolute bullshit, so you don't have to worry about anything!"

"As if I have ever gone a day without worrying."

You sit up, lifting him up to sit with you.

"Well, we're going to try, because you deserve it. Pleaseeeeee, I just want to spoil you."

He can't ignore your pleading, especially when you look at him with those soft eyes, a gaze that could ask for anything and he'd oblige.

"Alright fine, I will follow along on your self-care day, even if it sounds a little silly."

"Great! So, remember how I went out after dinner last night, and I told you that you couldn't come with me because I was doing something super special and secret?"

"Oh, when I was terrified of you roaming the city by yourself? No, why would I remember that at all?"

His voice is absolutely dripping in sarcasm.

"You know as well as anyone that I can take care of myself, you just like being a chivalrous piece of shit to people that are mean to me."

He shrugs.

"Yes. That sounds entirely reasonable, why would I not do that?"

"Okay yes whatever you like protecting me blah blah blah. We're getting away from the story. I found lots of cool little things, for example..."

Your voice trails off as you dig through your bag, trying to find the cloth sack you got your hands on yesterday. After you find it, you slowly open the pouch.

"I found your favorite tea!"

It's quite a particular brew, one you're pretty sure was made in this city. It's almost impossible to find anywhere else, and when you find it here, it's usually expensive. You hand the bag to him, and he takes in the scent. Blackberry, lavender, ginger, and a couple notes of citrus. Is it way too complex? Yes, quite, but he likes to dissect the flavor, focusing on the different components in the drink.

"You remember that thing I said, what was it... about saving money for, oh I don't know, a place to live after this? You know this is far too expensive my dear."

"It's fine, I can pickpocket a few people."

He laughs.

"You mean I can pickpocket a few people and you'll say you were there for moral support?"

"Yes."

Astarion simply sighs, because if he didn't love you, gods would he absolutely hate you. You could probably say the same thing about him though, so at least you're even. He grabs two cups from somewhere in the mess of his belongings, and the two of you make your way to the dying campfire. As you grab some water from one of the carafes, he adds some more wood to the fire, casting ignis instead of actually putting in the work to start a fire. Usually you would tease him about how he doesn't know how to start a fire, but today he's allowed to take the easy way out. You begin boiling the water for your tea.

"Okay, time for surprise number two while surprise number one is still cooking up."

"Oh, a second surprise?"

"It's self-care day, not self-care hour. There are many surprises to come."

You quickly walk to Gale's tent, bringing back a charcuterie board, filled with small finely cut fruits and mini cheese wedges.

"Ta-da!"

Astarion takes in the beauty of the spread, his heart fluttering a little. Sure, he doesn't have to eat, but he certainly lives for the finer things in life, and a charcuterie board is one of them. After all, eating things that aren't bloody animals makes him feel a little more normal. You smile, realizing he's actually excited and isn't relentlessly teasing you.

"I bought them last night and had Gale put together the spread this morning. I know it's less romantic but-"

"No my sweet it's... it's wonderful."

The two of you eat heart shaped strawberries and little pieces of cheese while you wait for the tea to brew.

"I know I joked a lot, but I do really appreciate all of this darling. It's nice, to know someone cares about me this much. Especially to know that you care about me this much."

"Of course my love. You deserve this and so much more."

You kiss his neck, leaving a little bit of juice from the strawberries. It's hard sometimes for Astarion to remind himself that the worst is behind him, that all he has to do now is deal with his master, and he can finally leave all of this shit behind him. He can finally have that life he wants, with you in some nice house, sleeping together in a nice bed every single day. It's also hard to remember that you love him, that he isn't some charity case you picked up, that you do all of this out of the kindness of your heart. He thought for the longest time that no one was truly kind, and that if they were, they were going to be dead soon enough, and yet he would do anything it took to keep you safe, one of the kindest souls he's ever met. He tears up a little, thinking about how you would care this much, that anyone could care this much about him.

"Are you okay Aster?"

You wipe a tear off his cheek.

"Yes, I'm alright. Just sentimental, that's all."

The way his eyes get wide when he cries, as if he's letting the world in for once, you always notice it.

"That's okay, you can cry all you want. Besides, usually makes you feel better after."

While you're consoling him, you pour out two cups of tea, handing him the first. You take a sip, realizing why this is his favorite. Sure, it's a lot going on, but there's something luxurious about it, soothing, as if made for royalty. Astarion wipes at a couple of his tears, and takes a sip.

"I'm serious though Tav, you have got to stop spending all of our money after this. I'll take this one nice day, but after that, it's back to pinching pennies for us."

Always worried, always thinking about the next thing, always five steps ahead. He's always had to be, playing his life like chess, knowing he's a pawn in some far greater game, knowing if he makes one wrong move he'll lose everything. You don't blame him one bit. After all, the two of you do need enough money to buy a place after all of this is over, and yet you don't worry about it, knowing you'll figure it out. Things have worked out for you so far, and they'll continue to. They simply must.

"Alright, deal."

After sitting and drinking your tea for a while, talking about what you want in the house when you finally buy it, you lead him down to the nearby creek so you can wash his hair.

"Now I know what you're going to say-"

"What, that I could simply do it myself and that you don't have to do something ridiculous like wash my hair for me?"

"Yes... something like that, yeah."

"Then why would you even try asking if you could?"

"Because I love you, and I want to, and I don't want you to have to worry about it."

You stay silent for a second.

"...and I may have bought a really nice shampoo from a store in the city even though I probably shouldn't have splurged but I just want you to have nice things..."

You make those puppy eyes at him, expecting him to say no or give you some lecture.

"Alright, if you insist."

"Wait, really?"

"Yes. Now go ahead and start before I change my mind and lecture you about how to properly bargain for things."

Now this, is a truly rare occurrence. He's so particular about his hair, to the point where he has to fix it every time you mess with it. You swiftly fill a bucket of water and take the nice shampoo out of your bag, putting yet another strawberry in your mouth.

"Seems like you're enjoying the strawberries much more than I am."

He says as he turns his back to you, the two of you sitting in the grass by the creek.

"Hey, it's a board for the both of us. If you're not eating off of it, that's your loss."

You mumble while still chewing on the fruit. He realizes you're right and grabs another piece of cheese before you eat it all. You motion for him to take his shirt off so he doesn't get water all over it, and soon you start working through his hair. It's sadly become quite knotted the past couple of days, due to neglect from the slump he's been in. You try your best not to get sad about it, knowing it's the truest sign of just how out of it he's been. Between dirt and knots and dried blood, there's plenty for you to work through, slowly but surely cleaning it all out, combing through it along the way.

"Are you sure I'm not going to look like a wet cat when you're done?"

You laugh at him.

"Hey, I never said anything about styling, just that I'd wash it. How it looks after is on you."

You don't see it, but he smiles. He has this moment of realization, a sense of clarity. This is it. The thing he's wanted all his life, he's found it, and it's someone so unlike him. And yet somehow, here you were, madly in love, eating fruit and cheese by the water, simply taking care of each other.

"I want it to stay like this forever."

He says suddenly. Your face lights up.

"Me too."

You put down the comb, wrapping your arms over the tops of his shoulders. He holds onto your hands, as if he's realizing for the first time just how real you are. You're here, and he's here, and you're in love. What a wonderful thing, to truly be in love, to have a plan, to have a future. He never really had a future, just a present, day after day. But now there's hope, a life after today, and tomorrow, and the day after.

"Would you do this again sometime? This whole, self-care thing with me? It's been quite nice."

You leave a couple of kisses on his shoulder, and he feels you smile into his skin.

"Of course. As many times as you want my love. Forever and ever."

#astarion #baldur's gate 3 #baldurs gate astarion #astarion x reader #astarion x tav #fluff #comfort

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even-disco-baby · 1 year

Text

SMOKER ON THE BALCONY — “Hello again, gendarme.” He smiles at you— not from his usual post, but from one of the cafeteria tables. A small sketchbook is laid out in front of him, along with some odd gray sticks.

ENCYCLOPEDIA — Compressed graphite. Not quite as bold or blendable as charcoal, but certainly less messy.

EMPATHY — Garte will appreciate it.

“I’d like to talk about the case again.”

“You moved! I didn’t know you could do that.”

“What are you drawing?”

SMOKER ON THE BALCONY — “That’s the question, isn’t it?” His smile turns a little rueful. “I found one of my old sketchbooks and thought I’d like to fill the last few empty pages, but I’m finding myself a little… uninspired.”

CONCEPTUALIZATION — The accursed artist’s block. Staring down an empty page only for it to stare back, mocking you.

EMPATHY — He is unsure of himself. He said this was an old sketchbook. Maybe he’s afraid of drawing something new beside his old work and seeing that nothing has changed.

“Ah, yes. Artist’s block. I know it well. In fact, I don’t know when the last time that I actually *made* any art was.”

“You could draw the cafeteria.”

“You could draw one of the other diners.”

SMOKER ON THE BALCONY — “A life drawing exercise, huh? And who would you pick as a subject, gendarme?”

“I don’t know. You’re the artist.”

“Maybe Garte? The skua could be a fun challenge.”

“You should draw the guy with the wig and sunglasses over there. He looks pretty funny.”

“Lena! She’d probably love to model for you. It would take her mind off things.”

“Kim, how about you pose for him?”

[Suggestion - Medium 10] “Why not me?”

KIM KITSURAGI — “No.”

He has nothing more to say on the matter.

“Aw, why not? You’d make a great model!”

Let it go.

KIM KITSURAGI — “I do not get paid to model for portraits. I get paid to solve murders. Such as the one we came here to investigate. Several days ago. Which has not been solved yet, for some mysterious reason.”

ESPIRIT DE CORPS — In case you couldn’t tell, that was sarcasm.

“Come on, Kim. You’re the perfect subject! A true man of the people. And there’s this sort of radiance about you… I can see the portrait already, just looking at you. Really clearly, actually.”

Maybe don’t say that. He’s just not gonna get it.

SMOKER ON THE BALCONY — He shrugs. “Sorry, gendarme. It’s not right to use someone’s image without permission, you know? Maybe some other time.”

KIM KITSURAGI — “No.” And then, a little awkwardly, “But thank you.”

“I don’t know. You’re the artist.”

“How about Garte? Though, you’d have to draw the skua, too…”

“You should draw the guy with the wig and sunglasses over there. He looks pretty funny.”

“Lena! She’d probably love to model for you. It would take her mind off things.”

“Kim, how about you pose for him?”

[Suggestion - Medium 10] “Why not me?”

CHECK SUCCESS

YOU — “Why not me?”

SMOKER ON THE BALCONY — He considers you with some amusement, but still, he does consider. “You’re not too busy?”

“On second thought, you’re right, I have some work to do right now. Another time, maybe?”

“Nope. Not at all.”

KIM KITSURAGI — The lieutenant sighs audibly.

ESPIRIT DE CORPS — What did I *just* say?

SMOKER ON THE BALCONY — He chuckles to himself, apparently quite tickled by the little comedy act you two are making of yourselves. “Beautiful. Why not? Have a seat. I’ll try not to keep you too long.”

KIM KITSURAGI — “Much appreciated,” he says drily.

YOU — [Take a seat.]

SAVOIR FAIRE — Time to strike a pose. Let’s go with something cool. Something that really captures what you’re all about.

ENDURANCE — But make sure it’s something that you’ll be able to hold comfortably.

Wink and shoot him your signature finger guns.

Look at him with big sad eyes like a shamed puppy.

Look thoughtfully into the middle distance, as if contemplating your own future masterpiece.

Stare straight at him with eyes that have seen how this world will end.

Hold your head up high. With *honor.*

Just sit and act natural. No need to put on airs.

SMOKER ON THE BALCONY — He looks you up and down, thumbing his bottom lip. His eyes look brighter and more alert than you have ever seen them. And then, he picks up his graphite and begins to work.

His eyes dart between you and the page, his hand sweeping across the page in bold, practiced strokes. All traces of his earlier hesitation have vanished.

VOLITION — Sometimes, a little push is all we need.

SMOKER ON THE BALCONY — Every now and then, he pauses to look up at you, and it’s almost unnerving to be the subject of whatever calculations are going on behind his eyes. He holds out his graphite, squinting just slightly.

VISUAL CALCULUS — This is called sighting. He’s roughly measuring the relative proportions of your figure and checking them against his sketch.

KIM KITSURAGI — Even the lieutenant is watching now, interested in spite of himself.

“Are portraits your specialty?”

“Have you been drawing anything for school lately?”

Better not distract him.

SMOKER ON THE BALCONY — “Hmm…” He ponders this for a moment, not looking up from his work. “Not exactly. I’m more interested in the graphic arts than this sort of thing. But it’s best to build a strong foundation before branching out, you know?”

YOU — “Graphic arts? Like what?”

SMOKER ON THE BALCONY — “Printmaking.” A small smile tugs at the corner of his mouth as he speaks, seemingly without him even noticing. “Monotype, especially.”

ENCYCLOPEDIA — Monotype is a printmaking technique that is singular from other techniques, in that it produces only *one* unique print, rather than an edition of multiple prints.

YOU — What, really? What’s the point of printing it, then?

ENCYCLOPEDIA — I don’t know. I didn’t invent it.

“Why monotype? Wouldn’t a different technique be more… practical?”

“I see.” [Drop the subject.]

SMOKER ON THE BALCONY — He shrugs slightly, smudging a bit of graphite with a bare finger. “Depends on how you define practical, I suppose. If I had my own studio, and I was selling my prints, then maybe. But we make do with what we have, gendarme.”

EMPATHY — And what he has is very little.

SMOKER ON THE BALCONY — “Besides, I think monotype has its charms.”

The young man does not elaborate, instead focusing on the work at hand. He picks up an eraser that has been shaved down to a point for fine detail work, and begins on what are likely the finishing touches.

EMPATHY — He has already talked at uncharacteristic length about this. It’s making him a little uncomfortable.

SAVOIR FAIRE — He doesn’t like to share too much about himself because it makes him feel *uncool.* He prefers to maintain an air of mystery.

RHETORIC — It’s safer, too, that way. He’s learned that passion exists to be exploited. False promises and admiration are the offerings of Sunday friends.

“If you say so.” [Back off.]

“What kind of charms?” [Press on.]

SMOKER ON THE BALCONY — His eyes flit back to you, sizing you up now in a different way. And then he looks back down at the page with a quiet bre ath.

“Well, it doesn’t take as much time or labor as other methods. Or expensive tools, or dangerous chemicals. Just paper, a plate, ink, and something to apply it with. And I can use the same plate over and over again, even use it to create different layers for the same print.”

RHETORIC — In other words, it’s cheap and can be done from home. An attractive option.

SMOKER ON THE BALCONY — “And with monotype, it’s not so hard to go back and change your mind. You can start over as many times as you’d like, right up until the moment you lay the page on the plate.”

INLAND EMPIRE — That really does sound attractive. To be able to wipe the slate clean, over and over again…

SMOKER ON THE BALCONY — “There aren’t as many limits on what kind of textures you can create, too. Brushstrokes and fingerprints… They can really come out beautiful.”

His brow creases a little, and he picks his graphite back up to rework a particular area.

DRAMA — He’s still holding out on you, sire. Too self-conscious to admit what he really likes about the medium.

YOU — Which is what?

EMPATHY — Fragility.

CONCEPTUALIZATION — An image which is only complete after being mirrored and translated, never to be recreated except as a ghostly afterimage. An exercise in surrendering to chance. What will be, will be. And then the moment will pass, and it will be time to start the next piece.

VOLITION — This man knows disappointment intimately. It is his closest companion. He has learned to make peace with it. He passes the time with his Sunday friends, lays his paper on the plate and hopes, despite himself, for the best.

YOU — Is that… a good thing?

VOLITION — …It’s hard to say. But we make do with what we have.

SMOKER ON THE BALCONY — “There.” The young man sits up straight, and it’s only now that you realize just how close he brought himself to his work.

DRAMA — His face may not betray him, but the body does not lie. He was having *fun,* my liege.

SMOKER ON THE BALCONY — “All done.” He tears the page from his book and holds it out to you with a small smile.

ITEM GAINED: Portrait of a Disco Holdover

SMOKER ON THE BALCONY — “Hope I didn’t keep you too long.”

KIM KITSURAGI — “Don’t worry about it,” Kim says, rather resignedly.

ESPIRIT DE CORPS — If you’d declined, the lieutenant thinks, my partner would have just found some other way to get sidetracked.

KIM KITSURAGI — Still, he cannot stop himself from glancing at the portrait over your shoulder.

PORTRAIT OF A DISCO HOLDOVER — It’s you! Unfortunately. Not even the most masterful hand could make the Expression less unsettling to look at. Your posture is poor, your face is swollen and blotchy, your hair is thinning, your clothes are shabby and out of place… I could go on.

Oh god, you could?

Please don’t.

PORTRAIT OF A DISCO HOLDOVER — But, you know… it’s nice. The smoker’s technique is bold and rather lovely, broad strokes of graphite intersecting in just the right places to create surprising depths. Somehow, even though it’s you… it’s not hideous.

EMPATHY — Because you’re seeing yourself through another person’s eyes.

CONCEPTUALIZATION — There is an odd tenderness to the portrait. Something amusing in your grimace, a touch of sympathy in your hunched shoulders. With the eraser, he has lifted small spots of pigment from your face, as if it were illuminated by flecks of light from the karaoke disco ball.

There are no disco lights tonight, but still, he sees them when he looks at you. Your moment has passed, but it left quite the impression. A ghost print, superimposed over you.

“Not bad, but the bicep girth is off. Right, Kim?”

“Oh god, is that really what I look like?”

“Hmm. It’s okay, but you should consider a backup career plan.”

“Whoa, you’re amazing! Can you draw me again, but this time in the costume from the cover of Man from Hjelmdall and the Devil Woman? And like, with a really cool warhammer? And Queen Lydiaana standing in the background, all like, ‘boohoo, where will I ever find another man like Ha— I mean, the Man from Hjelmdall?’”

“Beautiful.”

SMOKER ON THE BALCONY — His smile climbs up into the corners of his eyes, warming his entire countenance.

CONCEPTUALIZATION — If you were to capture a portrait of him in this moment, it would be beautiful, too.

#disco elysium #harry du bois #the smoker on the balcony #kim kitsuragi #this one is. so self indulgent. i like the smoker i like to think abt him #and assign him my art student interests #anyway. oh the joy of making art and showing ppl what they rlly look like in your eyes #and oh the beauty of monotypes and printmaking and hoping for the best #GODDAMMIT I FUCKED UP THE FORMATTING AGAIN AND DIDNT CATCH IT UNTIL LIKE 12 HOURS LATER.#if you saw that. no you didn’t.

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thatonepeppi · 10 days

Text

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧gale dekarios head canons✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊

I CANNOT stop thinking about this man, so I'm going to dump all of my thoughts here, enjoy :)

the format is odd, I have not written in some time, excuse me :3

☾ after the final battle

⋆ after the final battle, the two of you go back to your own room in the Elf Song Tavern, not before a very much needed shower that is. You two care for each other, chatting slowly and longingly at what your next moves are like the two of you have all the time in the world -and now you do.

⋆ Gale tiptoes around the subject of Waterdeep. He longs to be home, he's been picturing you this entire time in his home, doing everything. Making love, cooking for you, having tea in the mornings, how you would look in his bed as the sunlight and the moonlight creep in. Gale wants that life with you desperately, something simple and cozy, and with love in every action.

"Are you still there?" Tav asks, "My hair feels very clean now, especially in that particular spot."

In the midst of his reverie, a subtle "Hmm?" escaped from Gale's lips, abruptly awakened from a trance, "Oh, apologies, Dearest. A lot on my mind -- well I guess not so much anymore," He laughs quietly, rinsing off the bubbles in their hair, fingering through their strands of hair. Wherever Tav was needed, he would be sure to follow, he was certain of it. But still, he was homesick.

Tav frowns, "What's wrong, Love?" They lean into Gale, "You can talk to me, about anything."

Minutes slipped by like grains of sand in an hourglass until Gale finally spoke, his voice barely above a whisper. "Tav," he began, hesitating as if unsure of his own words, "I... I miss home. Waterdeep," He looks away, "Wherever you go, know that I will follow and happily too. Whether it be another adventure, here in Baldur's Gate, your own home. For you, I would sleep on the ground again, as long as your warm presence is there with me," He looks at them, nothing but warmth and sincerity in his words and in his eyes, "I love you, wherever we go, or wherever you are."

Tav's heart ached at the confession, the weight of Gale's homesickness palpable in the steam-filled air. Without hesitation, they reached out, clasping Gale's sun kissed and freckled hands in a gentle reassurance, giving them a gentle kiss.

"I know, my love," Tav murmured, their voice soft as a caress. "We can go home whenever you're ready. I'll be right here, by your side, every step of the way."

In that moment, as Gale's eyes met theirs with a mixture of gratitude and relief, Tav realized that home wasn't just a place—it was the warmth of their shared love, cocooned in the sanctuary of the bath, and where they found solace in each other's embrace. And though Gale longed for the familiar sights and sounds of Waterdeep, Tav knew that their love would be their anchor, no matter where their adventures took them in the realms.

☾ home

⋆ Gale is giddy from the start of the morning hopping off the massive ship the two of you took to get to Waterdeep. He takes your hand in his as he guides you down his city, excitingly pointing out all the areas he promises to take you once the two of you are settled.

⋆ Stepping into Gale's tower, you are immediately embraced by a whimsical antiquity, the cozy allure of a bygone era evident in every corner. Soft candlelight bathes the space, casting dancing shadows that whisper tales of adventure. Books adorn every surface, their well-loved pages holding secrets and enchantments, while antique treasures dot the shelves, each one a nostalgic relic of older times. Through the grand balcony, the endless expanse of the ocean stretches out, its rhythmic waves a soothing melody. Ships setting sail, the grunts of the dockhands as they tie these giant ships to their posts. In this enchanting haven, amidst the warmth of history and the timeless beauty of the sea, you find a sanctuary unlike any other. Home.

⋆ After settling in, you experience a life like no other. Gale is incessant on cooking you breakfast almost every morning. He knows how to prepare your morning coffees and afternoon teas by heart. Mornings are for the two of you to lounge in bed, holding each other, listening to the crashing waves, feeling that cool—salty breeze caress your warm bodies.

⋆ Breakfast is eaten over the occasional game of lance board on the grand mahogany table. The two of you recounting your adventures, encounters and memories. Gentle caresses and soft laughter are a welcome guest at breakfast. Even at the dinner table it seems like the two of you can't keep your hands off of each other.

⋆ Tara finds her way back home not long after. Its the very early morning, and a rare day where Gale is still in bed. You walk over to the tressym pawing at the large window, demanding to be let in. You smile as you let her in, and her furry body hurriedly makes her way inside.

"About time you let me in, I've been howling for hours, Darling, I feel parched!" The winged cat says, "I was not told that the two of you made it back, what a journey. Luckily for you, I am quite the magical tresseym, a simple spell like the one I invented is no match for miles and miles of road and walking," Tara trails off, making herself at home and out of earshot, you can still hear her grumpy rambling however, "Tav Dekarios!" She yells and you hurry over to see her sitting, licking herself next to an elegant white bowl on the floor, "My dish needs water."

You fill her dish with cold water, making sure to also refill her food bowl, you smile at the thought of you taking Gales last name already, hopefully you and Tara can foster a good relationship.

"And where is Mr. Dekarios currently?," Tara says stretching.

"Still in bed, and very warm if you would like to snuggle up to him."

Tara meows excitingly, "Oh, that sounds divine, Dear. Thank you ever so kindly for keeping him warm," She says as you start to get up, "But before you go Ms/Mr/Mx Dekarios, there is something very important that you must learn. Something that will quickly earn your favor with me."

"And what would that be Ms. Tara?" You question, facing down at the tressym, still at ground level with her.

She looks at you with widened pupils, "A good scratch behind this tressyms ears would be delightful, I will show you how but only once! This is known as my 'Due' and it's been made clear to me that you are quite the capable person to be entrusted with such a delicate procedure," Tara leans her head down and closes her little eyes. She rubs her ears with her paws to show you exactly how she wants to be pet, but to you, it looks like she's just cleaning herself, "You see? Like this, Dear, gently but also with some vigor." She looks back at you, "Your turn, but you must remember the technique."

You smile at the tressym, before going to scratch her behind the ears, silently praying that you are doing something right. She purrs and leans into your hand, making a sweet little content face as it looks like she's getting lost in the scratch.

Tara abruptly stops and clears her throat, "That will have to do, thank you," She trails off into you and Gales shared room. You hear a faint, "Mr. Dekarios! I have arrived!" in a little sing-song voice, and then a groan from a very sleepy Gale.

⋆ Some of your items find their way into the house, Gale is sure to make space for you to fit you into his home. Your shirts sometimes get mixed up, "Is this my book or yours?" is a common question.

⋆ He loves seeing your personality fill his house, items depending on your class are scattered around the tower. If you are a druid, house plants are hung from the ceiling, there is a small succulent on Gale's desk (It replaces Mystra's statue.).

⋆ If you are a bard, he loves to hear your music throughout the house. Gale loves to hear your song from the balcony as he's reading. He buys you sheet music, new strings, equipment. He could listen to you for hours, and most days he does.

⋆ Gale is interested in your interests and makes sure to make time for you to listen to you about your favorite topics. Being seen and heard is very important to him.

⋆ Over time, he does lose the earring. He finds one that reminds him of you. A music note, a sword, a small plant stud, or just about anything that he would relate to you.

⋆Gale loves you more than anything and he wants to make that very clear, even if you feel like these small reminders of Mystra don't bother you, he would rather having something that would make him think of you rather than her.

Thank you sm for reading, friends!! its been very long since ive written something and this isn't proof read >.< hope it was okay. Love you!!

#gale dekarios #gale of waterdeep #bg3 gale #gale x tav #tav #gale #bg3 #bg3 tav #baldurs gate #baldurs gate 3 #love the third person and first person #its 3 am leave me alone #also I love tara SM #she's adorable #tara the tressym

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devilat-thedoor · 1 month

Text

Smile Pretty 2

A/N: it’s been quite some time since i put anything out. and i know this probably isn’t what most people are hoping for from me, but i simply couldn’t stop thinking about this. (half credit to my sun, liana fr, because she multiplies my brainpower by 76000000. so. HUUUUUGE shoutout to @stardustvanfleet and @jakesguitarsolo for being my favorite people ever and offering a never ending stream of jake thoughts. i love you both endlessly and you don’t even understand how much i appreciate you🩵

Word Count: 4.2k

Jake x f!reader

Warnings: Smut 18+ Minors DNI(Oral[f rec], Unprotected Sex, Spit, Dirty Talk, Degradation, Power struggle???, a bit of praise, teensy bit of cumplay, Camera Use, very light impact play) if there was anything i may have missed, please do not hesitate to tell me!

Making your way down the corridor, you watched the room numbers as you went, searching for 623. Tour had started a month ago and you hadn’t seen Jake since the day he left; you were supposed to visit him a week ago, but your work schedule got messed up and you couldn’t make the trip. He was disappointed and you swore you’d make it up to him, but what he didn’t know is that you’d already arranged new plans and, with Josh’s help, you were currently strolling down the hallway of their hotel to surprise your boyfriend. You stopped in front of his door, flipping the keycard through your fingers and shaking out your nerves. Holding the card up to the reader, you paused, leaning in to press your ear against the door. Your hand shot up to cover your mouth at what you were hearing; a series of grunts and groans that were unmistakably Jake’s…but there were other sounds too. More moans, quieter than his, but they were feminine. He’s watching porn?

You pressed the keycard to the door and listened to the confirming beeps before pushing it open. Jake was shifting fast, all but tossing his phone across the room as he yanked a pillow over his legs to cover the evidence of whatever he was doing. “Goddammit, Josh. Just because you have the extra key doesn’t mean- Shit…” His eyes went wide when you stepped into his view.

“Surprise…” You couldn’t hide the smirk on your lips as he gazed at you like a kid caught with their hands in the cookie jar. Closing the door, you dropped your bag to the floor and took a few steps toward the bed, “Did I interrupt something, baby?” You stopped when your knees hit the edge of the mattress and crossed your arms over your chest to stare at him with an eyebrow raised.

He opened and closed his mouth a few times before taking a second to swallow back the odd anxiety that seemed to rise in him. “I’m just…surprised…to see you. Why didn’t you tell me that you were coming? I- uhhh. I would’ve planned for dinner or something.” He was slowly sitting up straighter but the pillow remained in his lap. “Actually, dinner sounds great, I’m sure we can find something quick…Can you- I should grab a quick shower before we go…Will you start the water for me, babe?” You would’ve gone along with Jake’s poor attempt at a subject change had he not kept glancing at his phone, laying face down at the bottom of the bed. He watched your head turn slowly, your eyes landing on the device as you chewed on your lip, and tried to bring your attention back to him. “Hey! Danny said something about a great Mexican place not too far from here… Supposedly they have, like, award winn…ing…” His voice trailed off as you mindlessly nodded your head, your arms falling to your side.

“Uh huh…” You lunged for his phone and he tried to snatch it up before you but it was too late. Your fingers curled around it and you rolled off of the bed and scurried across the room, “What were you watching, Jake?” You illuminated the screen and typed his passcode in as he clambered out of the bed, trying desperately to tuck away the obvious tent in his tight boxers. “Everybody watches porn, Jacob. Why are you being so secretive? Is it like- OH GOD… Is it kinky shit?” You chuckled as the screen opened up to whatever he was watching and you clicked the play button.

“Babe, let me just-.” He reached for the phone but you held your finger up and twisted out of his reach.

You were speechless as you tried to comprehend what you were watching. “Oh…Oh…” Met with an image that you were quite familiar with, you glanced at Jake and back to the phone. It was the little film project that you two had made before he left and you’d almost forgotten about it until now. “Jake-.”

He cut you off, reaching for the phone again, “Okay, just shut it off.” A huff of frustration escaped him when you ducked beneath his arm and moved to the opposite side of the room. “C’mon. Would you just- turn it off, babe.” He was coming after you again, but you stayed planted in place, your eyes glued to the screen as a grin stretched over your face.

“No… I haven’t even got to watch this yet. How many times have you watched it?” You met him with an accusatory expression and he dropped his gaze to the floor. “...thought so… Let’s watch together.” You shrugged as you kicked your shoes off and climbed onto the bed, resting against the headboard. When he didn’t follow suit, you paused the video and patted the space beside you that he was occupying when you’d arrived. “Come on. We made it together, we can watch it together…Baby, come sit down and watch the fucking sex tape with me.” You whined through your giggles as you tapped the bed again.

Jake finally relented, heaving out a sigh, and climbed onto the bed to settle in alongside you. “You don’t think it’s weird to sit and watch ourselves fuck?” He took the phone from your hand and scrolled the bar the whole way to the beginning before looking at you.

You cocked an eyebrow at him, “I think you’re being weird… What was the point of making it if we weren’t gonna- Wait. Do you just…not want me to watch it? Because you obviously have… More than once.” You turned to face him completely, awaiting a response.

“I like watching you, angel…” He spoke genuinely, grasping your hand in his. “No cliche porno could ever compare to what you do. So yeah… I’ve watched it a few times.”

You could feel the heat spreading across your cheeks at his admission. “Baby….” Leaning in, you pressed your lips to his, dragging a hand along his thigh. He was leaning further into you, anticipating the path that your fingers were taking, but you stopped before they could reach his boxers and pulled back from the kiss with a teasing smirk. “Press play, Jake.” You couldn’t help but laugh as he let out a frustrated huff before complying with your request. Snuggling in closer to your boyfriend, you viewed quietly, watching yourself on the screen as you strutted towards the camera, peeling your robe off. “Wow…my tits look fucking great.” Jake had a hand resting on your leg, giving a gentle squeeze in agreement to your statement. You bit down on your lip at his dialogue in the video as you smiled up at the lens and began to stroke him, “You’re never that bold when we’re just having sex…” It was a thought that tumbled from your lips and made him turn to you.

“What does that even mean? I’m not bold?” He paused the video and put his phone on the nightstand. “I’m fucking bold… Don’t act like I don’t make you cum every time we fuck, you know I do.”

You took notice of how he began to breathe a little harder as a note of irritation radiated from him. “Baby, that’s not what I’m saying… I just mean that-.” You thought for a moment, trying to figure out the best way to explain what you meant, when an idea struck you. “I don’t know, Jake. I mean, yeah… The sex is always good, don’t get me wrong, but-.”

He cut you off abruptly, “But what?” He watched you bite your lips together with a shrug and he stood from the bed, “No. What the fuck were you gonna say? The sex is always good, but what?” Jake was growing more irritated with each second of silence that passed but you were keen to the stiff bulge in his boxers and decided to press a little harder.

“It’s just kind of…boring. Or- What’s the word they use? Vanilla.” It took everything in you to keep your laughter down as his eyes practically turned red. “Jake. Baby, it’s fine… I don’t need exciting sex.” You climbed off of the bed then, turning your back to him with the fear that you wouldn’t be able to keep up your act, “The way you do things is…alright…I guess.” When you turned around to look at him again, he was fuming. You had him right where you wanted him and a flood of arousal rushed to your panties at the dark expression he wore. His nostrils were flaring, chest rising and falling rapidly with angry huffs, but he remained quiet. “Uhh. I have to pee.” You offered him an innocent smile before scurrying into the bathroom and locking the door behind you. The look on his face was one that you didn’t see very often but knew very well and it made you clench your thighs together in need. Staring at yourself in the mirror, you tried to prepare for what could happen when you eventually walked out of the bathroom. Would he be angry with you and give you the silent treatment? Or… Would he try to prove you wrong? You knew Jake was nowhere near vanilla, but teasing him was always the fastest route to the best sex with him. But…did you take it too far this time?

You took one last steadying breath and unlocked the door to step out of the bathroom. With no time to register what was happening, Jake had his hand loosely wrapped around your throat with your back pinned to the wall, an amused smirk on his face at the way you gasped in surprise. “You think you’re so goddamn smart, huh?” He leaned in close, his nose pressing into your cheek as he dropped his voice to a whisper, “If you wanted me to treat you like a whore, no-… My sweet little cumslut, right?” He chuckled condescendingly as you whimpered at his degrading names, squeezing your legs tighter. “Ask nicely, angel… You don’t have to be a fucking brat to get what you want, understand?” Releasing your throat, he watched as you nodded your head obediently. “Good girl… Take your clothes off and put your palms flat on the mattress.”

Complying immediately, you shredded every piece of fabric from your body and paused to look at him, “Jake, I-.” You shut your mouth when he shook his head silently and pointed towards the bed. Making the short walk, you were vibrating with anticipation at what was about to come. You could feel Jake getting closer as you bent down, placing your palms atop the warm duvet. His hand was on your ass in an instant, ghosting up over your spine and back down to caress your thigh before settling on your lower back. Everything was still for a moment and you almost opened your mouth to question until his free hand came down hard on your asscheek. “Fuck!” You cried out, mostly from the shock of it, but there was a slight sting left in the wake of his palm.

“So you think I’m vanilla?” He was rubbing his hand up and down your inner thigh when you began to stutter out an answer, but his touch left you at loss, unable to utter a response, and that wasn’t good enough for him. Jake reeled his hand back, delivering another slap; this time to the spot he was just pampering. “Words, angel. Use them.” He paused for a moment to admire the way you began panting and shifting your weight back and forth between your feet. “Tell me again about how boring I am.”

A shiver rippled through your body as he bent down to whisper in your ear, but you managed to keep a small bit of composure. “I- I don’t know, Jake… There’s just…a lack of excitement…” You swallowed the lump in your throat and tilted your head to look at him.

“A lack of excitement, huh?” He was grinning wide as he straightened back up and exited your line of sight. “See… now I know you’re lying-” He disappeared suddenly; his touch gone, you couldn’t see him in your peripherals. Just as you began to say his name, you felt him. His large hands gripping your ass and thighs to slip a thumb through your slick folds. “-because if there’s no excitement, your pussy wouldn’t be dripping like this.”

“Jake, please…” You weren’t entirely sure what you were pleading for but you couldn’t stop. “Please don’t tease me… I missed you so fucking much.” You were whining as you pushed back against his hands.

Jake chuckled, clearly amused at your desperation, “Needy little thing… What do you want from me, sweet girl?” His voice was saccharine sweet, tinged with a bit of something else. Mischief, maybe?

You contemplated begging on your hands and knees until a better idea struck you. “Well, baby… Prove to me just how bold you can be.”

A low growl rumbled out from behind you, the sound echoing through the room. “Yeah, I’ll fucking show you…” His hand weaved through your hair, grabbing a healthy fistful as he pulled you up from the bed. You could feel the heat emanating from him as he held your back flush against his chest to speak, “Let’s see if you can keep up, angel.” In a flash, he was shoving you back down, making sure your chest was pressed into the mattress before he released you. He knelt down behind you, spreading you open to spit directly onto you. The feeling of his spit dripping from your cunt made you shudder but he didn’t give you much time to process as he burrowed his face between your thighs. Jake’s tongue lashed rapidly at your clit before he tightened his lips around the bud.

“Jesus, Jake! Wh- Fuck…” You clawed at the fluffy, white comforter, crying out shamelessly as he devoured you. It didn’t take long for your legs to begin trembling at the way his tongue slipped through your folds and his nose nudged your entrance. You were toeing the edge of a cliff, awaiting your fall with one final push from him, “Don’t stop… Don’t you dare fucking stop, Jacob. I- Oh God, please! I’m g-. What the hell, Jake!” You whipped around to glare at him, your chest heaving and knees weak, but he was standing up from the floor, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand.

He was grinning wide, showcasing his perfect teeth, when you stood straight to meet him face to face. Just as you started to scold him, he gripped your jaw, smashing his lips against your own and pushing his tongue into your mouth. When he broke the kiss, he spun you back around, pressing his covered erection against your ass, “You thought I was gonna let you cum that quick? After all the shit you talked?” He cackled loud and the sound lit a new kind of fire in your blood. Jake was sure he had you at his mercy and you used that to your advantage, forcing out a weak whimper. “Awwe… don’t whine, baby… If you want something, all you have to do is tell me. Use your words. Remember?” He was sliding his boxers off as he spoke.

You could hear the smirk in his tone and that’s when you made your move. Faster than the speed of light, you whipped around, catching Jake by his throat, and flipped him onto the bed. It was clear he was caught off guard by the way he began to stammer. You pulled the boxers from his ankles before crawling over him, “What’s the matter, Jakey baby? Did you forget how to use your words?” Giggling at his scowl, you sat on his chest, keeping his arms pinned beneath your knees. “I think it was a little rude, that stunt you pulled before… Don’t you think?” You kept your voice sweet, pouting your lip at him.

“I think you deserved it.”

“Hmm… I see.” You scooted further up his torso, making sure he couldn’t wiggle his arms out from under you. “How about you make me cum with that mouth that you love to run so much…and maybe I’ll see if you deserve a reward afterwards, hmm?”

Jake cocked an eyebrow at you in challenge, “Sure, angel… Won’t take too long anyways.”

The look he was giving you made butterflies erupt in your stomach as you began to settle over his mouth, slowly lowering yourself. “If you say s- SHIT!” The second his tongue made contact with your sensitive clit, your eyes were rolling. You gripped tightly onto his hair as you started to rock against his face, “Oh- Oh fuck…” There was no doubt that he knew exactly how to use his mouth and that was evident by the way he had you quickly unraveling atop of him. You tried your hardest to hold yourself together, but Jake had managed to slip himself lower so that his tongue was prodding at your entrance. He groaned into your cunt before he began thrashing his head back and forth, his nose flicking repeatedly over your clit. “Jake, I- I’m-...” Your words trailed off into a series of moans as your legs started to shake and close around his head. He didn’t slow down in the slightest and if his hands were free, he’d have you pinned down to his mouth, making sure he got every bit of your orgasm out of you before you could move… But he wasn’t in control and once the overstimulation hit, you scrambled off of his face and sat back on his chest as you fought to catch a breath.

He rubbed his palms up and down your thighs to try to stop their trembling. The touch was so sweet and affectionate, but the moment didn’t last long. “How about you quit pretending like you’re holding the reins and let me take over again, beautiful?”

“Baby, if you want the reins, you gotta take ‘em.” You flashed him a sickeningly sweet smile and when he began to respond, you reached behind you to wrap your hand around his stiff cock. Holding eye contact with him, you started to stroke him slowly, eliciting a deep groan from the back of his throat. “I’m sorry, Jake… Were you gonna say something?” Everytime he opened his mouth, you squeezed him a little tighter to make his breath catch. “Yeah, that’s what I thought.”

He was glaring up at you as you removed your hand to maneuver your body over his throbbing length. “And you said I love to run my mouth? You’re a goddamn tease.”

Your hand shot out to grasp his jaw, “I may be a tease, but I always give you what you want in the end, don’t I?” As your sentiment concluded, you sunk onto him; your mouth hung open and Jake subconsciously mimicked your expression as he held onto your waist. Once he was buried completely inside of you, your head dropped back, “Hmm… so fucking thick, baby…” After a moment of adjustment, you leaned down to peck his lips, catching his bottom one between your teeth with a moan and pulling before allowing it to snap back.

He stared at the point where your bodies connected as you raised slowly and dropped back down. “Ride it like you fucking own it, angel.” Jake commanded through husky breaths and the sound of his voice made you clench around him. Anchoring your hands on his chest, you took his words to heart and began bouncing, adding a slight twirl to your hips with every drop. “There you go- fuuuuck. Just like that…” He slid his hands from your waist to grab a handful of your ass before resting them at your hips.

The sound of your skin smacking together echoed off the walls, only overshadowed by Jake’s husky groans and your heavy breaths, as you rode him. You were focused on his face, the look of pure ecstasy he wore as his eyes continuously fluttered shut, “You like that, Jakey?” Slowing your movements, you opted for a change. Leaning back, you placed your hands on his thighs behind you for leverage and started to rock against him. When his mouth dropped open and he began bucking up into you, a smile formed on your face. “You like when I fuck you like this, Jake?” Your voice was sultry and low, “When I claim your fat cock like this, hmm?”

Just as you found a steady rhythm, his grasp on your hips tightened and he flipped you off of him to quickly climb over you. “Such a mouthy little whore, huh?” He moved so fast that you didn’t stand a chance in fighting for your dominance. He had your ankles on his shoulders as he leaned down, effectively pressing your knees into your chest, “You just got too goddamn cocky…” Jake slammed back into you, filling you up entirely as you cried out and grabbed blindly at his arms and clamped your eyes shut. He immediately grabbed your chin with one hand while he cupped your cheek with the other, “Nuh uh. Open those eyes and fucking look at me… I wanna make sure you know who makes you fucking cum like this, angel.” His thrusts were unrelenting, hitting the sweetest spot inside of you, and when you finally managed to pry your eyes open to stare into his large brown ones, he drew his hips back and dove back in with an impossibly deep stroke.

“J- fuck. Jaaake….” His name clambered out of your mouth in a mess of broken whimpers as your legs began to shake around his head. “Oh my God! FUCK, Jake!” Your nails dug deep into his forearms as he held your head steady and continued pounding into you, fucking you through your second climax.

“That’s it, sweet girl… Say it again. Let everyone know who makes your pussy cry, angel…” He gave a short, condescending chuckle as you breathlessly muttered his name for a third time. “That’s my good girl…” Suddenly he pulled out, letting your legs down, and turned you over onto your stomach. You were too dazed, stuck in a fucked-out fog, to question. But he slipped back into you to chase his own release, “You want me to fill this sweet cunt, pretty girl?”

You could feel your eyes going crossed as you clawed at the thick comforter beneath you, “Yes- fuck…” The pressure was building again, faster than the last two times and you began to beg, “Please, Jake… I want it, baby… Need you so fucking- bad.” Your moans were growing louder and drawing him closer to the brink.

He pressed a palm flat to your back to pin you against the mattress and fucked into you with hard, punctuated thrusts. “You want it, angel? I’ll fucking give it to you… Sounds so pretty when you beg for my cum.” His voice was strangled, groans vibrating from somewhere within his chest and you offered one last plea that sent him over the edge. Jake buried himself deep, a single ‘oh fuck’ leaving his lips before you felt him empty his sticky release inside of you, the feeling bringing you to a third and final orgasm. He was hunched over your back for a moment as he caught his breath, but when he finally pulled out, he flipped you back over and pushed your legs apart. Watching him through droopy, exhausted eyes, you heard him click his tongue a few times before he was dragging a finger over your folds, your body shivering at the contact. “Fucking begged for it and the little cumslut can’t even hold it all in… Feels a little disrespectful to waste, hmm?” He pondered to himself as he gathered his dripping seed with two fingers and pushed it back into your pussy. The overstimulation had you trying to squeeze your legs shut, but it didn’t stop him from finger fucking his cum back into you, “Aht… Almost done, angel…” When he removed his digits, he held them up to your mouth and you welcomed them happily, lapping the mix of release from them.

He finally collapsed beside you, allowing you to roll over and cuddle against him with a lazy smile, “Okay, I take it back, baby… You’re pretty fucking bold. Jesus Christ, that was…” You trailed off, giving him a soft kiss.

His hand rubbed gently up and down your back as a cocky grin began to stretch across his face. He pointed behind you, “Thank you, beautiful… but can you say that one more time to the camera?” You lifted your head to see his phone set up against the lamp on the nightstand. “Or that one…” He pointed to the dresser on the opposite side of the room where he had your phone set up to capture a different angle.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” You sat up to glare at him, trying to hide your own grin.

He simply shrugged, “Now you can watch it as much as I will.” Jake wiggled his eyebrows before pulling back down for another kiss.

lil taglist for friends i think may enjoy this😌

@ignite-my-fire @gvfpal @mybussyinchrist @ageofbajabule @klarxtr

#jake kiszka #jake kiszka x reader #jake kiszka smut #jake kiszka fic #sinsofstardust #greta van fleet #gvf #greta van smut #jake gvf #gvf fic

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morganski-19 · 2 months

Text

The One with Sleeping

Steve wakes up with someone’s arm wrapped around his stomach. Which is odd considering he didn’t have anyone over last night. And he’s on his couch with beer bottles on the coffee table and what looks like two crushed ends of a joint in the ash tray.

But he’s too groggy to figure it all out, and it’s probably just Robin anyway, so he leans his head back down and starts to fall back asleep. Until the other person stirs and sits up rapidly, causing him to fall off of his couch.

“What the fuck,” he grunts, slowly getting up from the ground. At least he’s awake now. “Why did you throw me off the couch Rob-.” Steve stops as he sees who’s on the couch. “You’re not Robin.”

Jonathan stares at Steve with a mix of concern and fear. “No, I’m not.”

“Why were you sleeping on my couch?”

“Why were we cuddling?” Jonathan asks, acting as if it was the more pressing question of the two.

Steve collects himself off the ground. “I don’t know. I tend to sleep cuddle people.”

“You sleep cuddle people. That’s a thing?” Jonathan sits up, running a hand through his tangled hair.

“Yeah. Ask Robin, she has a lot of stories about it.” Steve fixes his shirt, it having twisted weird when he fell off the couch. “Thanks for throwing me off the couch by the way.”

Jonathan makes a sheepish face. “Sorry. You scared me when I woke up.”

Steve sits down next to him. “It’s fine. So, why were you sleeping on my couch.”

“I don’t know,” Jonathan scratches at his chin. “I remember coming over last night for some drinks, and then we got high. We must have just dozed off.”

“Together, on the couch,” Steve reasons.

“You don’t think we, you know. Did anything, right?” Jonathan asks cautiously.

Steve laughs. “No, no we’re good. Even cross faded me knows not to flirt with my friends.”

“Does sober you know not to do that?” Jonathan deadpans. Having witnessed Steve play flirt with Eddie multiple times.

Steve clears his throat, avoiding answering that. “The point is, I wouldn’t have tried anything. Not with you, so we probably just fell asleep and somehow ended up in this position.”

“What do you mean not with me?”

“Oh my god,” Steve rolls his eyes. “Now you’re offended? You don’t even like me like that.”

Jonathan scoffs. “And neither do you.”

“Exactly, which is why I wouldn’t have tried anything.”

“But if it was Eddie, would you have tried something.”

“I’m not answering that.” Steve gets up to clear away the old bottles, carrying them over to the recycling can. “If it was Argyle, would you have?” he finally counters.

Jonathan’s face breaks out in a flush that he tries to hide with a cough. “Can we agree not to mention this is anyone?” he changes the subject. “Say I just stayed over and slept on your couch, alone.”

Steve shrugs. “I guess. What, you ashamed that we cuddled on my couch or something?” Jonathan looks away. “Oh my god, you are. How fucking dare you?”

“What do you mean? This isn’t exactly normal for the two of us.” Jonathan stands.

“Sure. But you wanting to hide it means you’re ashamed. Are you ashamed that you slept with me.”

Jonathan gives him a blank expression. “Please don’t call it that.”

“I am calling it that, because it was true. The two of us, slept on the same couch, together, also while cuddling a little bit. It happens, it was an accident. We use it as a funny story and move on.”

“Or we don’t mention it at all.”

Steve crosses his arms. “Alright, under one condition. You admit that was the best sleep you’ve gotten in a while.”

Jonathan huffs. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“I think you know exactly what I’m talking about. Chronic insomniac Jonathan, falling asleep for what looks to be about, oh I don’t know,” Steve looks at the clock on the oven. “Six or so hours, undisturbed. That had to have been a good night’s sleep.”

Jonathan scrunches up his face before giving in. “Fine, ok.”

Steve laughs in victory.

“It was the best night I’ve gotten in a while, you’re right.”

“For me too, actually.”

“Wait. Wasn’t Robin here last night?” Jonathan remembers.

Steve’s eyes widen. “Yeah, she was. Where is she?” He lightly taps on her door before opening it, finding an empty, unmade bed. “Shit, she’s gone.”

“So, she saw us,” Jonathan accepts defeat. “Great. Where do we think she is?”

There is suddenly a loud burst of laughter from across the hall. “Oh no,” Steve groans.

“We’re never going to live this down, are we?” Jonathan asks with a wince.

“Nope,” Steve says defeated. “We go in together?” He turns to Jonathan.

Jonathan nods. “Only way to do it at this point.”

Steve heads across the hall to Nancy and Eddie’s apartment. He nods at Jonathan before opening the door to ruckus laughter.

“There are the sleepy heads,” Robin teases on the couch. Waving her phone in the air. “Hope we didn’t wake you up,” she fake pouts.

Eddie comes out of his room with a picture in his hand, holding it close to his chest when he realized Steve and Jonathan are there. “Oh, hey guys,” he says with a knowing smile.

Nancy starts laughing. “How’d you guys sleep?” she asks innocently.

Argyle sits on the armchair with crossed arms. “Terribly, I hope.”

“I thought this would happen,” Jonathan whispers while pinching the bridge of his nose. “We slept as good as two people sharing a couch do.”

“You admitted it so fast,” Robin barks. Cackling.

“You all already know,” Steve defends. “Also, what the hell is in your hands?”

Eddie tries to cover the picture with his hands. “Nothing.”

Steve walks toward Eddie. “So, I can see it then?”

Eddie runs to the other side of the room, Steve chasing after him. They do a whole back and forth at the kitchen table, Eddie almost running into the counter when he gets away. Steve fails to catch up with him as Eddie does another lap.

Jonathan moves out of the way before he gets run into, walking over to a still upset Argyle. “It really wasn’t that great,” he lies.

“Don’t lie to me,” Argyle says, avoiding Jonathan’s gaze.

Eddie runs into his bedroom, unable to lock the door before Steve gets it open, following him in. There’s a crash, causing Nancy to perk up with concern. But when yelling and sounds of wrestling continue, she sits back on the couch, sipping her coffee.

“Fine, it was the best sleep I’ve had for a few weeks. But it doesn’t mean anything, it was an accident I promise.”

“Are you weirded out by this,” Robin whispers to Nancy.

She just shrugs. “Not really.”

“It was really an accident?” Argyle asks.

“Yes, I really didn’t mean to. I’m sorry.”

Argyle finally looks at him, his face softening. “Promise?”

“I promise.”

“No,” Eddie yells from the bedroom. “Don’t rip it.” Followed by a “Ha, got it,” from Steve. He walks out victoriously with the picture.

“Neither of you are bleeding, right?” Nancy confirms, not really caring anymore. Steve shakes his head.

Eddie comes out of the room, leaning on his doorway, panting. “Please don’t tear it up. It was my last piece of picture paper.”

“Out of all of us, why is it you that has a printer?” Robin asks. Eddie just shrugs.

“What is it?” Jonathan asks, wincing.

Steve walks over to show him. “What you think. Why did you print it out anyway?”

“To put on the wall of many shames,” Eddie says, pointing to the wall covered in pictures of the group scattered along the back wall. Some with pictures drawn on their faces and other various situations they’ve gotten themselves into.

Steve looks at Jonathan, who just shrugs. With a roll of his eyes, Steve walks over and tapes it to the wall.

Tag list (let me know if you want to be added or taken off) @slowandsteddie, @annieofhearts, @cacdyke, @ubpd, @captain--low, @thespaceantwhowrites, @goodolefashionedloverboi, @anne-bennett-cosplayer, @lunaticparisianlady, @apomaro-mellow, @dolphincliffs, @dragonmama76, @maggiebug417, @stevesbipanic, @fearieshadow, @mentallyundone, @eightpackdiaz, @au79burger @bookworm0690 , @practicallybegging, @potato-of-the-lord

#morgan's friends au #stranger things #friends au #apartment au #spicy six apartment schenanigans #steve harrington #jonathan byers #robin buckley #eddie munson #nancy wheeler #argyle stranger things #pre relationship #implied steddie #implied jargyle #steddie #jargyle

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saturnbellfromhell · 1 year

Text

WHAT I THINK OF YOUR VENUS SIGN part I.

So after taking a month long break unexpectedly, I'm back with something fresh and fun to get myself back on track. I've already had a post like this, but it got flagged for inappropriate language. So this time, I'm toning it down a little. This is my SUBJECTIVE view on the Venus signs, so don't take it personally. For the record I'm an earth Venus, so if you experience some similarities, comment down below so we can discuss! With that being said, shall we get started?

🟫ARIES VENUS

For some odd reason, Aries Venuses always pop up in my life. As a boyfriend or as a lover, the main thing I love about them is how forward they are with their emotions. They can be love bombers, so watch out. But in my experience, they just want to skip to the good part. No caution what so ever. In love they are so playful, gitty, humorous and down to earth. They are always very fiery and exciting in the bedroom. If you want to have a summer fling, get yourself an Aries Venus, you will never forget it. Not saying they are only for that, when being in a relationship with them, you really have to keep things fresh and new, otherwise they will get bored and move on fast.

🟫TAURUS VENUS

O my, now of course since I am an earth Venus, this one really gets me. They just smother the hell outta me every time I meet them. Very grounded and patient in love. You won't really see a Taurus Venus jump from relationship to relationship. They are so passionate, loving and caring it can sometimes be too good to be true. Until...the jealousy appears. Tauruses in my perspective are very calm, cuddly and cute, until they feel insecure. Than they can become absolute hell. Make sure to reasure your Taurus Venus partner and shower them with affection and romance. Their love language is a mix of cuddling, acts of service and words of affermation. I really can't pin just one. They also love giving and receiving gifts. Such divas, I know.

🟫GEMINI VENUS

This Venus placement is not for the weak. First of all you have to be a very talkative and amusing individual to even grab their attention. Secondly, if your going to try to change their views on romance, love, marriage...think again. Gemini Venus is the sign that lives for an adventurous partner. They love their freedom more than anything. They're also the one's to not be very stuck on their ex, in my experience. They just go on with their life. Not the lovey dovey, die for you placement, but a very different experience if you ask me! This can vary if their is a lot of water in the chart, of course.

🟫CANCER VENUS

Want to stay in bed and kiss/cuddle all day? Well than Cancer Venus people are for you! They are the queens and kings of doing things for other people. So yes, their love language is acts of service and also psychical touch! They love to be hugged and kissed and all the time. They can be quite clingy sometimes and not want to leave the house, since they feel the safest that way. They are very emotional, intuitive and can get easily hurt. When being hurt they back away and look at the bigger picture. They are also a sign that in my perspective only goes good with another Cancer Venus or Pisces/Scorpio Venus.

🟫LEO VENUS

I've written about Leo Venuses in the past in one of my observation posts, but I'll say it again. They are not my cup of tea, but I absolutely adore them. They are the one's who want their significant other to shine all the way. They put their partners on pedestals and shower them in gifts and affection. They are not the one's to shy away from PDA or any semi sexual talk/act with their loved one. They are always risky in the bedroom, but like it their way. Their love language is for sure words of affermation and physical touch!

🟫VIRGO VENUS

I've grown up with two Virgo Venuses my whole life. My mom and dad are both Virgo Venuses and what I've learned from them and others is that this sign takes the crown for acts of service when it comes to love language department. They aren't the one's to be super romantic and clingy, but they show their love in other ways. They can be a little critical of their partner, but it isn't in a mean way. What they want is their partner being/becoming more successful. They love to do something and show to their partner, it puts a smile on their face when they validated threw their actions.

× Keep in mind while the sign in which Venus is is very important, where they act is in the houses. So of course an Aries Venus in the 1st house is nothing like an Aries Venus in the 9th house! Yes they have some similarities, but are nothing alike.

Like for part 2 if you enjoyed this!

xoxo n.k

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kurooo-is-here · 4 months

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Hear me out. Drayton and Kieran with a mute s/o?

(Tbh I feel like Drayton would think they’re just shy for the first couple of interactions until someone tells him though lol)

Okay, I'm not super knowledgable about deaf or mute folks. But here's my best shot at this ask, if I am incorrect about anything please let me know!

My interpretation of this is that reader is deaf and communicates through sign language, and they cannot speak at all.

Drayton and Kieran with a mute/deaf Reader

(Ignore the snom gif I couldn't think of anything specific to use for this lmao)

Drayton:

Yeah, he's totally clueless at first. Doesn't get why you're doing odd hand motions instead of talking, but he figures everyone has their quirks. It really bothers you that he won't acknowledge it, so you ask Lacey to tell him for you.

When Drayton hears it from Lacey, he feels really bad and is immediately apologetic. He rushes over to you and attempts to apologize, then realizes he doesn't understand sign language at all, so he stumbles on his words a lot.

Lacey facepalms watching all of this go down, so she reluctantly teaches Drayton some basic sign language so he can get his apology across to you. He's delighted to finally be able to talk to you properly-- he has a crush on you, after all.

The rest of the Elite Four soon complains that Drayton studies sign language better than he studies for any of his classes, but he is absolutely determined to make things right with you. Lacey says she's never seen him work that hard!

When he finally confesses to you, he does it right. He makes sure he corrects himself if he messes up a sign, accidentally blurts out a few words while signing-- but you can tell he really means it. It warms your heart to see him trying so hard for you, despite his initial ignorance on the subject.

Drayton notices you get bullied a lot because you're some regular student hanging out with the big leagues (the BBA Elite Four). He IMMEDIATELY shuts down anyone who has the balls to talk shit in front of you knowing you can't hear them. That kind of vile behavior will never be tolerated on his watch.

He texts you a lot. He still talks to you through sign when he sees you in person, but since he's usually busy doing League Club work (or just pretending to be busy), he texts you when he has a moment of free time. At one point you changed his contact name on your phone to "The Drayster", which made his entire WEEK. He would NOT shut up about it.

Don't let this man figure out swears and silly insults in sign language, he's gonna use them all the time now. One time Crispin asked what Drayton was laughing about and he just signed "bullshit" in response which immediately had you on the floor in tears of laughter while Crispin looked SO confused.

Kieran:

Luckily he's more perceptive and understanding than Drayton, so he picks up on your disability right away. Turns out he already knew a bit of sign language from teaching himself too.

When you ask him how he knew sign language already, he just shyly responds that he wanted to be prepared for the event that he needed to communicate with Ogerpon through it for some reason.

He teaches himself a LOT more sign language after meeting you. He really wants to go the extra mile for his new friend and possible crush so he studies and does his research diligently.

Kieran already understands if you're socially awkward, because he's full of anxiety himself. He totally gets it if you need to rely on him to be your translator at any point.

He really loves you and has no problems with your disability, even if he has to try a little harder for you. And after a while, communicating with you becomes easier, which makes you really happy!

After the events of Indigo Disk, he becomes much more protective of you. He wants to become stronger so he can protect you from anyone who tries to bully you or hurt you. His Hydrapple is gonna have a word or two with whichever idiot tries to disrespect your name in his presence.

Whenever he greets you, he tries not to catch you off guard from behind or something, since you can't exactly hear him coming. He really tries to respect your boundaries too, so if you feel uncomfortable with anything he does, he understands.

Slightly unrelated, but Kieran definitely flips people off a lot. He tries to be less pissed when he's around you, but on his own? He's saying "fuck you" to a LOT of people.

One time he tried explaining to a guy about your disability, and the guy had the nerve to do the 👉👌 sign at you as some kind of sick joke... the BBA Elite Four found that guy beaten into a bloody pulp on the ground later. Kieran was taking NO prisoners that day.

#pokemon #pokemon scarlet and violet #pokemon drayton #pokemon kieran #pokemon drayton x reader #pokemon kieran x reader #reader is mute/deaf #drayton is such a boyfailure #but he tries his hardest god bless #kuro writes

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nsharks · 5 months

Text

bleeding blue | part fourteen preview

Blue holds her arm out, stopping you from taking another step.

"Sh. I see one."

Up ahead, a squirrel stills on a tree, beady eyes unblinking. In a matter of seconds, Blue throws her knife and pins it to the bark through the stomach.

"Nice," you comment. "You got it on the first try this time."

In your hand is the other squirrel she killed for you. Ghost started working on your bow yesterday. He didn't say anything to you about it, but you spotted him sitting on the porch chiseling away at a hunk of oak. Until he's finished, you've struck another deal: helping Blue skin the rabbits in exchange for her killing squirrels with you. She's better at killing them with a knife than you are, and you needed something to get you off the couch, anyway.

"This is good practice for me." She wriggles the knife out and hands you the kill. "Poor guy didn't see it coming."

"Probably better that way."

She slips the knife back to her ankle. "Do you need more? Or is two enough."

"Two is enough. I saw these flowers by the trench that I think are edible."

"You can eat flowers?" She makes a face. The two of you begin heading back toward the camp. You didn't go off too far with her. Ghost said she wasn't allowed to go past the pond without him. Truthfully, you were surprised he let her go with you at all.

"Yeah. Pink Sorrel. They taste lemony, and I'll add the leaves, too. Like a salad."

"Yum," she says sarcastically. "Did Paul teach you that?"

You nod. "He knew a lot about plants."

"Are you sure he didn't like you?"

"Blue," you almost groan. "You've asked me this twice now."

"Well, you seemed to have spent a lot of time with him, and he taught you a lot of things."

"You can spend time with someone and learn things from them without... liking them."

"I wouldn't know," she shrugs, waving her hand around. "There are no boys here for me to spend time with besides Ghost."

There is a pause as a cloud rolls over the sun, turning everything dim before it passes. The weather these past few days has been fluctuating like true spring. Cold showers in the morning, intense sunlight by noon, and clouds that come and go. The cabbages Blue planted have sprouted fat, juicy leaves. You've mentally scolded yourself for not including seeds in your deal with Ghost.

"So when are you and him going to start training or whatever?" Blue speaks up, switching subjects.

"Training?" you repeat.

"He told me you wanted to learn some things." She glances at you. "Look, let me just warn you, he can be a real hard ass. One time, he made me climb up and down a tree twenty times without stopping. And another time, he made me throw knives over and over until I hit the exact same spot on the tree again."

Right. Somehow, that last request you made of him has slipped your mind. You did ask him to teach you how to better defend yourself against other people.

It's been over a week now, and the two of you still haven't talked much except for the necessities. Honestly, it's probably best that way. Maintaining a clinical relationship with him should keep the peace and maybe even earn more of his trust. You're growing confident that he doesn't see you as much of a threat anymore. Last night, you ran into him again after waking up sweaty at some odd hour, and all he did was walk past you, step outside for a cigarette, and then go back to his room. He didn't seem suspicious of you being up at all.

That said, the reminder of the 'training' he's supposed to give you makes your teeth snag onto your lip.

When you don't respond, Blue adds, "What exactly do you want him to show you? I hate to say it, but I don't think he'll give you one of his guns."

"No," you shake your head. "I don't want that. It's not Greys that I'm as worried about. As long I've got distance, I can use my bow for them. It's more about... other people. They get close. Too close."

"Well, you can always bite their nose off," she gives a bump to your shoulder.

You cringe. "I'd rather not have to do that again."

She pauses, looking at her boots. "What did it taste like?"

"Fucking awful. Probably the grossest thing I've ever experienced."

She looks up. "If you were a Grey, you would've loved it."

"Well, I'm human still, and I much prefer these guys." You wag the dead squirrels in front of her face and she laughs. If you could replace all her tears with that sound, you would.

"You still haven't answered my question," Blue tilts her head. "When are you getting started? Because I have some training in mind for you, too."

You arch a brow but don't question it. "Um. I don't know. Ghost hasn't said anything to me about it, and he's busy working on my bow right now."

"Why don't you ask him, then?" She shoots you a knowing smirk. "Are you scared of him, Twix?"

"No," you say all too quickly. "No... I'm not. I just don't know how to talk to him. He's not exactly approachable."

"Just do what I do. I say whatever I want to him. Except when he's pissed, then—" she freezes for a moment and lays a hand on your shoulder. "—it's better to shut up and listen. Believe me."

You speak under your breath. "Noted."

#simon ghost riley x you #simon riley x reader #cod #ghost #simon ghost riley x reader #fanfiction

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lazyjellyfish300 · 3 months

Text

Still and All🌿

Miguel O'Hara x Fem reader

Gif credits to @miguelo-hara

Synopsis: You have a lifelong sexually transmitted infection. You've learned to live with it, but you started dating Miguel, and you need to tell him at some point. Word count: 4.7k

TW: MINORS DO NOT INTERACT. STIS: HERPES SIMPLEX VIRUS 2, TALK OF UNPROTECTED SEX, RELIGIOUS TRAUMA IMPLIED, INSECURITY, SLUT SHAMING, SELF DEPRECATING THOUGHTS, ANGST, STIGMATIZED THINKING ABOUT STIS, TALK OF SAFE SEX INCLUDING CONDOM USE, SMUT AT THE END( EVENTUAL UNPROTECTED P IN V, SPANKING, ORAL F RECEIVING), IN SHORT THE SUBJECT MATTER IS RATHER HEAVY AND IF ANY OF THE ABOVE IS SENSITIVE FOR YOU, TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF AND SKIP THIS ONE. ❤️

A/N: I DREW ON PERSONAL EXPERIENCE TO WRITE THIS. I HOPE WE CAN EVENTUALLY COMMUNICATE OPENLY ABOUT SEXUALLY TRANSMITTED INFECTIONS AND DISEASES WITH NO STIGMAS ATTACHED. BE SAFE AND HEALTHY. I GOT MY INFORMATION FROM THESE SOURCES, ALTHOUGH THE INFO IS IN LINE WITH THE SOURCES, PLEASE DO NOT USE THIS WRITING PIECE AS A SUBSTITUTE FOR MEDICAL ADVICE. TALK TO YOUR PHYSICIAN.

World Health Organization

Hopkins Medicine

Herpes.org NZ

-----

You weren't sure how you'd tell him. Or exactly when you'd tell him. You had told others before, but this time was different. You really really liked him. If you had the ability to envision someone you wanted to do the rest of your life with, he would be it.

And what you needed to tell him could cause you to lose him forever. And that news was that you had a sexually transmitted infection. Herpes Simplex Virus 2. Or HSV-2 for short. And you lived with it for years. It wasn't a big deal, really. But it took you a long time to get to this point.

You wondered if your strict religious upbringing and being repressed for most, if not all of your adolescence and young adulthood were contributing factors. It all came to a head when you were finally an adult and could move out of your parents' hypervigilant gaze. You started feeling excited at this new found freedom but went a little crazy with it. You started dating casually. It was exhilarating and felt empowering to be desired. To know that men wanted you, craved you, and desired to know the deepest, most intimate parts of your body.

So, you had some fun.

It was clear most of the guys you dated weren't as educated on safe sex either, or the passion of moment just threw those safety precautions out the window. It was careless, yes. And absolutely risky. But you didn't know how to ask for these things and weren't taught how to. You were afraid to speak up, that they wouldn't want you anymore if you put your foot down.

Several months into your promiscuity, you had a sinking feeling in your stomach you should go get tested when you felt an odd tingly sensation in your genital region. You prayed that nothing was wrong.

The doctor could not have called you at a worse time. Right in the middle of your shift. You stood in the stairwell of your job, waiting for a sigh of relief or your entire world to come shattering down.

"Your blood work looks good, except..."

There it is. Except.

"You tested positive for HSV-2. You have genital herpes. It is a very treatable condition, but there is no cure."

Just like that, a life sentence. You were super young when this happened, so to you this was earth shattering. Your mind didn't even pick up the rest of what he was telling you as you hung up your phone.

The world outside seemed to grow fuzzy as though someone bludgeoned you in the back of your head. Colors rapidly disappearing, causing your retinas to only see gray. Claws of despair sinking into you. Not able to speak, not able to think, gasping for air while the tide crashed and beat against you again and again, keeping you under, forcing you to drown.

Your mind did what it does best and became your worst enemy.

"Nobody's going to want someone like me."

"I'm dirty."

"If you weren't such a careless slut maybe this wouldn't have happened to you."

"Quit crying, this is just a consequence of your actions, deal with it."

"You're being punished. Maybe if you weren't so weak and didn't lose your faith, God wouldn't have had to teach you this lesson. You wouldn't need to learn it if you were actually good."

"Typical for a pathetic girl like you with daddy issues who can't go a month without a guy telling her she's pretty. See what happens when all you're good at is spreading your legs?"

Your internal monologue flogged you like this for months. You had to take some time to just cry, just lay in your bed and wait, praying to the God that abandoned you. The winds and rains of self-doubt and misery mercilessly beating against you while you hid in a hole, waiting for the storm to pass. A numb expression on your face as you watched everyone outside live their lives while you just stayed frozen in place with a dark cloud over your head.

Just holding on for better days that hopefully laid ahead, hoping you'd make peace with this permanent new part of you that seemed to latch itself onto you overnight.

And... slowly, you did.

You started taking antiviral medication. And it improved your symptoms drastically. Having an outbreak could be quite painful and uncomfortable. Gritting your teeth and your eyes squinting in pain when you had to use the restroom with open sores, the sting causing you to suck air between your teeth.

Once you got the hang of taking your medication on a daily basis, any outbreaks you experienced were only a couple of times a year, usually popping up only if you were under extreme stress or if you had missed a few doses.

Outside of your physical health, dating was tricky. You pretty much began to avoid it altogether, despite the raging loneliness within you. You just wanted to know what it was like to recieve the love you were so ready to give someone else. To have someone hold you at night and stand across from you at the altar as you pledged to spend your lives together, a conscious decision to not let this condition stand in the way of you two being together.

Most people were understanding, but eventually they'd stop talking to you. The unmistakable shift in your dynamic as soon as you told them when things started to get good. You respected their right to not put themselves at risk while you simultaneously grieved for just once, to hear someone say,

"It doesn't bother me that you have this. I still want to be with you. Let's figure this out together."

You came across someone who also had it. But the relationship never grew into something serious for other reasons.

You took a long break. Just to find yourself and be comfortable with being your own person. Not letting yourself settle for less than what you deserved.

Eventually you found Miguel, who was a welcome change to all of that. After college, you were Spider Society's fresh new accountant, sticking out like a sore thumb amongst your STEM and Spider-Colleagues.

Miguel noticed you while he was walking to the break room for another pot of coffee. This wasn't even the usual way he'd go, but after a casual glance in your direction at the way your eyes were narrowed at your computer screen, lips slightly parted in concentration, he switched his route to include an accidental brush past your open office door from then on, intrigued with this new face around the place.

You noticed him the second time he passed by, and you had to do a double take. He was gorgeous. Strong cheekbones that led into a chiseled jaw and wide neck. Warm umber skin surrounding scarlet seas of his eyes and full, pouting lips. A majestic, tall frame that embodied strength in every sense of the word. The evidence lay in the fit muscles that crowned his entire body from his arms, to his legs and whew, that stunning back.

The third time, you noticed him approaching and gave a little nod of your head with a closed lip smile, the generic, passively kind, but also slightly aloof way that acquaintances passing would give to each other. He returned the gesture, and you felt your stomach do a little flip as he walked away.

Next time, you actually flashed a smile, and he raised an eyebrow but gave that lukewarm expression of acknowledgement again. Not quite a smile yet.

Oh, but the first time he smiled at you. That sealed the deal. At first, you felt that maybe you were in danger of just being in lust with the guy, his physical features the first thing to pull you in. But when he flashed that dazzling smile at you, you knew immediately that your heart was in actual danger of being absolutely wrecked by this guy at some point. The bottom row of his teeth were ever so slightly crooked. His bushy, sculpted brows so expressive despite the stoic disposition that always painted his face. He was sooo...so...

Perfect.

His laugh and his voice was a whole other issue entirely. His voice wasn't exactly deep, but it was gentle. A sweet caress against your eardrums. It dripped like honey. That small, whispery chuckle of his he'd let out when you finally made small talk with him had you wanting to bash your head against the wall.

"Top o' the mowwwrning to ya! " you said in a silly voice as he walked up to your desk.

He cracked a smile. "What's got you in such a big mood this morning?"

You smiled like you were keeping a secret. "Oh, just the fact that it's Friday, it's payday, I have a 32 ounce iced coffee, and I have theeee best job in the world!" (A little bit sarcastic about the last item you listed)

Miguel scoffed. "Well, I'm glad someone is happy around here. I can't seem to get any peace and quiet or work done with all these shocking anomalies we've been dealing with lately."

"You wanna know a secret?" You ask, raising an eyebrow, feigning mystery.

Miguel rolls his eyes but is unable to suppress a smile. "Dime." (Tell me)

"The bench at the bottom of the hill in the courtyard is actually the best place to go to get some work done. But don't tell anyone else about it because that's where I go on my lunch breaks."

Miguel's eyebrows raise. "Is that so? Well, you don't mind if I were to try it out this afternoon?"

You grin and swish your iced coffee. "Nope! All yours. You gotta text me about it and let me know how it went, though. Tell me I'm right."

Miguel scoffed. "You're on. But, I don't have your number."

Your cheeks burn a little bit but you scribble your number down on a sticky note and hand it to him. He shoots one more stunning smile at you and walks away.

Later, he did text you that you were absolutely right. Peace and quiet for a whole two hours outside managed to get him to complete 3 weeks worth of paperwork he was behind on. You felt like you were on top of the world, but it escalated to a whole new level when you were straddling his lap in the backseat of his car after your first date just a week later, making out with him in a quiet parking lot at the head of the trail where you two went on a hike together.

You were getting lost in how tasty his lips were, soft and full with just a hint of his sweat from the exertion. You feel the heat of the moment about to overtake you when he starts to grind his hips, feeling him starting to harden underneath you. Oh God, the way this man moaned was purely sinful.

You groan and whimper, realizing you can't take this further, no matter how much your pussy is begging for him right now. You pull away with a teasing smile.

"Let's wait..." you say softly, passion still dotting your voice.

Miguel shows the slightest bit of disappointment but nods in agreement. "Of course." He sighs and gives your thighs a squeeze of reassurance.

"I'm starving." you say, tracing his neck with a finger.

He smiles. "Well, let's go fix that right now."

You two shared grilled cheese sandwiches from your favorite food truck and as you walked into your apartment, you admitted to yourself that you were falling.

On your second date, you casually mentioned a little white lie that you were on your period to hopefully keep sex off the table so you wouldn't have to have the tough conversation.

"Oh, are you sure you're feeling up to getting dinner right now?" Miguel asked as you walked side by side towards the small Mexican restaurant.

"Mhmm!" You replied cheerfully.

Miguel gave you a skeptical look but followed you into the restaurant.

It was one of those express food places where you ordered your food at the counter. When the cashier asked if you were eating here or taking it to go, Miguel abruptly interrupted,

"We'll take it to go."

You looked up at him, puzzled.

"You're not feeling well, we should let you rest at home where you're comfortable." He replied, taking your hand in his.

"Oh, right!" You smiled and nodded enthusiastically. You totally forgot you were lying. Your heart starting to pump quicker in anticipation when you realize he's coming over. Give me the strength, please, God.

----

After you two went back to your apartment and ate, you talked for nearly two hours about literally everything. Your childhoods, your complicated relationship with family, favorite foods, places you've always wanted to travel to, politics, even.

As soon as you cuddled next to him on your couch and got a whiff of his cologne, soon your tongue was in his mouth and he was on top of you, kissing you with so much tenderness you were actually contemplating marriage in your head.

He sighed a little into your mouth, letting his hands wander down to your ass. Your eyes went wide, but you continued anyway, continuing to lock yourself against his yummy lips.

Miguel groaned and moved to kissing your neck, your vision flashing as your eyes fluttered at the tempting sensation he was giving you.

"Not going to lie...I want you right now..." He whispered against your skin.

You whimpered. "I want you too....so much....but I'm on my period, remember?" Hoping he'd buy it.

He inhaled sharply at your words, increasing the intensity of his kisses.

"I don't mind..."

Dammit.

You feel your eyes water and before you know it, you're crying. Miguel pulls back, concern in his eyes.

"Did I hurt you...? What's wrong...?"

He presses the back of his hand against your cheek as one tear after another and another streaks off to the side of your eyes and into your hair, gravity causing them to run downwards as you're still pinned underneath him.

"I can't..." You choke out. "It's just something I need to tell you."

Miguel swallows and allows you to sit up. His eyes remain locked on you and scan your face for any inkling of what you're about to tell him.

Just drop the bomb now.

"I'm not actually on my period right now. I can't have sex with you right away because I need to tell you that I have an STI. It's Herpes Simplex Virus 2. I'll have it the rest of my life. I get occasional outbreaks in my genital region due to stress or if I miss a couple doses of my antiviral medication. I've had it for over 5 years now and it's quite manageable."

Miguel nods, his face in an unreadable expression. His eyes leave yours for just a moment as though he's starting to think quietly in his head.

You exhale shakily, the worst part is over, but continue with the facts which you've rehearsed many times.

"It's very common. As many as 1 in 6 adults may have it in the US, but many who do show no symptoms, as a result they might not even know they have it. But, I understand that you need to do what's best for you and come to your own conclusion about what I just told you. So if you choose to not continue seeing me, I understand." At the last sentence, your voice cracks a bit. "I like you a lot. I'm sorry for getting emotional..."

Miguel sits in silence for just a moment longer and he puts a hand on your thigh. "Thank you for telling me.... To be honest, I was expecting worse news than that. Like, you have a secret boyfriend I don't know about or... " He gives a little scoff, then looks at you, not moving his hand from your thigh.

"It's not the best of news, but it's not the end of the world. And it certainly doesn't define who you are. You're still you, and I've enjoyed getting to know you quite a bit and find myself liking you a lot too..." Miguel swallows. It's been a while since he's been this expressive with his feelings, but he feels he can venture a little outside his comfort zone since you're putting yourself in such a vulnerable position right now.

"I don't know much about Herpes myself. I'd like to educate myself more on this and then we can talk more about what we can do from here. Is that okay with you?" He asks, his voice gentle.

You nod, eagerly. The weight of the world had just been taken off your chest, you could breathe at last. He asks you a few more questions, like how often you take your medication, when you got diagnosed, how you manage your condition and so on. You answer honestly and firmly, pausing to gauge his reaction and make sure you explained yourself clearly enough. After talking for another hour or so, it's about 10:30 pm. You've definitely reached quitting time, and you're fighting to keep your eyes open.

You two share a long embrace before he walks out the door.

"Thank you, for a wonderful night and for dinner and being so understanding. I haven't always had the best response when telling people about this." You say into his chest, trying to hold him long enough his scent will stick to you after he leaves.

He smiles, still holding you. "You're welcome. Thank you for being honest and vulnerable with me. I'm kind of amazed at how much we have in common. I'll talk to one of my medical contacts some more about this. Don't be worried if I don't text you right away tomorrow. Then, we can talk more about what we'll do."

You nod, and after giving him one last kiss on the cheek, he leaves out the door and into the night. You watch him walk down the stairs and close your door with a soft click.

----

The next day, Miguel's at HQ speaking with one of the physicians in the lab.

"What are the different types of Herpes Viruses?"

The doctor leans against the counter and answers,

"There are two types of herpes simplex virus: HSV 1 and HSV 2. HSV 1 commonly causes oral herpes, or cold sores. It can show up as an upper respiratory tract infection during early childhood, whereas HSV 2 is the cause of most cases of genital herpes. However, it is possible for HSV 1 to cause genital herpes and HSV 2 to cause oral herpes."

Miguel nods and asks more questions.

"I ask because I started seeing a woman recently who has HSV-2. To my knowledge, I don't have it. What would that mean for us in terms of intimacy?"

The doctor nods and she answers,

"HSV-2 is mainly transmitted during sex through contact with genital or anal surfaces, skin, sores or fluids of someone infected with the virus. It can still be transmitted in the absence of symptoms. If you plan on being intimate, I recommend the use of condoms to decrease the risk of transmission. If your partner is also taking antiviral medication to suppress outbreaks, that helps decrease the risk of transmission as well. But, if your partner is having an outbreak or symptoms, I recommend abstaining from sexual activity until they resolve."

Miguel nods and takes in all the information the doctor is providing him, thanking her for her time.

He calls you, and you answer eagerly.

"Miguel?"

"Hey," he answers. You can hear the soft smile in his voice as he greets you. "Want to meet at Central Park in an hour? I figured we could go for a walk and talk in person. You don't need to be worried. I want to see where this goes with us, and now that the doctor gave me more information, I want to talk about it with you."

You feel your chest rise with hope. "Yeah, absolutely. I'll meet you in an hour. Thank you for taking the time to learn about it. You have no idea how much that means."

Miguel smiles. "Of course. You've been so patient with me, it's the least I could do. See you soon, get there safe."

"See you soon!" You hang up, and go get dressed.

---

The rain has started to come down a little bit, sprinkling and peppering the pavement in little dots, the earthy petrichor permeating the late spring air as the sky melts into a faded grey overcast with a thick layer of cloud cover.

You tuck your hair in your jacket hood, starting to jog a little faster to escape the falling raindrops as you approach Central Park. You see Miguel sitting on a park bench, across from the pond, totally unphased by the precipitation. You stroll awkwardly up to him, not sure where to look as you get closer to him. He hears footfalls approaching and turns, searching for the source and finally notices you, becoming slightly amused at your displeased reaction to the rain.

"Sorry, perhaps meeting in the park wasn't the best idea considering the weather," he says as he stands up, causing you to move your chin up a little to meet his tall gaze.

"Yeah, perhaps not." You huff.

Miguel grins and gestures towards some trees that will provide a little bit of shelter from the budding rain shower and you follow him there.

He leans against the tree, hands on his hips. "I talked to the physician. All in all, it sounds like a very manageable condition, which you've already covered with me. You're already taking antiviral medication daily." He clears his throat.

"But, when it comes to sex, we should use condoms. At least in the beginning to decrease the chances of transmission, and make sure you're feeling well and have no symptoms before we do anything. You've had the condition for long enough, I trust you that you're aware of your body and can pick up on whether or not you're about to have an outbreak. Do you have any thoughts on that?" He looks at you.

You nod. "I think that's completely reasonable. Thank you for trusting me, really." You lay your hand on his shoulder, giving it a small squeeze.

He gives you a small side smile in return. "Just so you know, I'm not expecting sex right away. I just bring it up now, in case we find ourselves in a heated entanglement like we did last night..." He kisses your hand. "We'll have already covered it and know what to expect."

You nod. "I definitely want to, at some point. But I'm in no rush either. We'll wait for the moment to present itself I guess?"

He grins and stands up from where he was leaning, letting both of his hands cup your face now, nothing but soft affection for you lining his pupils.

"Sounds perfect to me."

You two traded warm, lingering kisses as the rain poured a little harder around you, saturating the city of Nueva York, turning the trees in Central Park a vibrant, otherworldly green, the thunder shaking the sky in a deep rumble.

----

2 years later on a cruise ship gently coasting the Caribbean

The blinds were drawn around your ocean suite, giggles escaped you and Miguel as you gave him a playful shove back onto your freshly made bed after dinner, courtesy of housekeeping, both of you about four wine glasses deep.

His breath hitches as he watches you slowly hike your strapless maxi dress down your body, biting his lip when your tits bob out of your dress, practically drooling as though it's the first time he's laid eyes on you when the fabric slinks off the rest of your body, kissing your curves on the way down until it's laying in a heap on the floor, leaving you naked in front of him.

"Ven aquí..." (Come here) He whispers, pulling you closer as he sits on the bed, the noticeable glint of a silver wedding band with a small diamond embedded in the middle on his left hand.

He leans down and licks hungrily between the folds of your pussy. You sigh and close your eyes, using those beautiful broad shoulders of his to steady yourself, the twinkle of your own sizeable rock on the wedding band on your left hand catching in the dim light of the honeymoon suite.

The sound of his licks get more sloppy and wet as you drip more and more into his mouth, his tongue fueling the fire. "God, baby...."he groans, landing a sharp spank on your ass.

You gasp and buck your hips into him, pleasure sizzling in your core when your clit brushes against his nose. He pulls you in tighter to his face and you lift your leg, putting one foot on the bed to spread your pussy wider for him.

He scoots back instead, pulling you on top of him and directly over his beautiful face, his chest hairs poking out of his half buttoned dress shirt. He has one hand gripping your thigh and one squeezing your ass cheek as he continues to eat you out. "Lower, baby.." he whispers, tugging you downwards so you're sitting right on his face.

You feel your cheeks burn as you look at yourself in the mirror hanging above your bed on the wall. Completely naked and legs spread, riding your new husband's gorgeous face, his powerful large body pinned underneath yours.

One orgasm later, you're panting and sweating on the bed, looking up at the ceiling when Miguel gets back on top of you, planting a sweet kiss into both ankles as he brings them to rest on his shoulders. You look at him through half-lidded eyes that rake over his majestic form, his arm muscles rippling slightly as he gets into position.

He brings his cock to the entrance of your pussy, your ankles still perched on his shoulders, swirling the tip around the outside to collect any remaining arousal as lube. Both of you gasp at the same time as he slowly eases his cock inside you. That first thrust sends you straight to heaven and you release a satisfied moan. He sets a steady pace, fucking you in splendid, deep, strokes.

Your lips fall open and he traces them with his thumb while still rutting into you. You close your mouth around it, sucking and swirling your tongue around his thumb while you gaze into his eyes.

His own mouth falls open a little, lust blown pupils of his showing he's dangerously close to cumming as he lets out a deep moan.

"Fffuck, baby, you look so beautiful like this. Sucking my finger while your pussy takes my cock..." He purrs.

You let out a filthy moan in response, still sucking his finger while he drives his cock deep into your pussy with both ankles on his shoulders. He leans down to kiss you, letting your ankles fall to the side and back onto the bed, opening your thighs a little bit as you welcome his body in missionary. He tilts his head to the side a little bit, scarlet irises pulling you in, then kisses you gently as his body continues to make love to yours.

You savor the kiss, letting your tongue explore his mouth, the taste of your pussy lingering in it and bringing both hands to tangle themselves in his hair. He pulls away for just a moment for air, and you coo softly to him

"I love you so much..."

He exhales slowly, slowing down his strokes just a little but making them more deep and dramatic, causing a twinge of pain and pleasure to course throughout your veins.

"I love you, my wife. Forever."

You kept fucking deep into the night, tropical colors painting the sky as the sun dipped below the horizon, nothing but ocean air and the thrill of adventure awaiting at your destination.

Your diagnosis and any other obstacles remained long forgotten as you and Miguel entered forever with hands intertwined, still and all.

-----

#miguel o'hara #miguel atsv #miguel x reader #miguel o'hara x reader #miguel ohara #atsv miguel #miguel o'hara smut #miguel o hara angst #miguel ohara angst #miguel o'hara x fem!reader #miguel ohara x fem!reader

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walliedarling · 1 year

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your characterization of wally not being malicious and just a... weird little guy is my new favorite thing ever he's so silly.. but i have a question! :)

since wallly doesn't understand the concept of crushes or having feelings for someone, and you've already made a post about how he deals with his feelings for us, but how would he react to us telling him about what it really means? would something click in his head, and he'd realize that that's what he was feeling all this time? would be attempt to confess to us then, or would he continue to be oblivious for the rest of his little felt life?

i think it would be an interesting concept for him to be rather weird in his approach to confessing if it ever came to that, since I don't think we would ever really explain that in detail- so he would just have to figure it out himself! as i assume, anyways.. and by that I wonder what means he would do to tell us how he feels, albeit odd or in any other way it comes across to us.. maybe he'd ask for some advice from his other lovely neighbors or just dive head in, whatever his forte is in that department @:)

this was longer than i originally intended, but i love your writing and enjoy reading through it!!<3

I'm glad you're enjoying my characterisation of him :D!! I'm not sure how popular it is (I've been a bit busy, so haven't read TOO many fics other than my own), but I am always happy to elaborate more on the way I see him!

You can explain to him what romantic feelings are, and it still doesn't immediately click for him, nor does he fully understand the significance of any of it. He doesn't have romantic fantasies in any traditional sense of the word, after all. But he does really want to be close to you, and he does think about you a lot. So, maybe…? He has to know more first, so he'll ask lots and lots of question. He'll ask more questions. How does it differ from friendships, exactly? What are things you would not do with a friend, but would do with a partner? How do you know if the person you 'like' also ' likes' you? (He makes quotation marks with his fingers every time he says it.)

Wally doesn't get embarrassed or flustered while discussing this at all, because he doesn't know that he's Supposed to be! He's just curious about this whole new type of relationship and love he's never considered before. It puts some things into new perspectives for him, though. Mainly any and all interactions between Eddie and Frank. He thought that was just something exclusive to them! Honestly, the whole explanation is likely brought on by him making a comment about something they were doing together.

He figures out what 'confessing' is when you tell him that's how you usually figure out someone likes you back. For a moment, he's tempted to ask you directly how you feel for him, right then and there, but he gets a little nervous. His usually calm demeanour does have its limits. Wally realises he's nervous because he doesn't want you to say that you don't feel the same way. So… That means he likes you, right? He guesses he'll have to confess!

But he feels completely lost on the subject after that, and is most likely to ask Eddie for advice. He introduces Wally to the concept of love letters, and the idea of what he wants to do is born from there. (If he hadn't gone to him for advice, it's likely he would've just blurted out the question 'Do you like me?' at a random point during the day.)

His confession letter is written in crayon, with little hearts at the edges of the paper. Wally writes in choppy, short sentences, not unlike the way he talks, that he's been thinking about you a lot, and even more since you told him what a crush is. He likes talking to you a lot, and he wants to talk to you a lot in the future as well. He still doesn't fully get what people do 'in a relationship', but would you like to show him? Do you like him as well?

Instead of having Eddie deliver it though, he will deliver it directly to you himself, and insists you open it right in front of him. It's… A unique experience, to say the least, because he's staring hard at you the whole time, even more so than usual.

#wally darling x reader #wally darling #welcome home x reader #welcome home arg x reader

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batrachised · 4 months

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Watching Anne of Avonlea (through sheer determination and after a series of events that involved unsuccessfully digging through the website's source code, I managed to rent it), and it strikes me how (in this instance, similarly to the book), Anne repeatedly crushes any romantic advancements on Gilbert's part. In the book, Anne avoids being alone with Gilbert and begs him not to propose to her. It makes me wonder: why did Gilbert think proposing to her would work? Is it because he wanted a sense of finality? Because he did genuinely think he had a chance? He does say this:

“There isn’t anything to forgive. There have been times when I thought you did care. I’ve deceived myself, that’s all. Goodbye, Anne.”

This implies that he did think a yes was possible. Yet I find this difficult to believe, because while we all know Anne does in fact care that way for Gilbert and doesn't know it yet, Anne has also been pretty blunt about how she doesn't think she does. Anne of the Island's first chapters are filled with Anne thinking about how awkward walks with Gilbert are now, or with her crushing any overtures he makes. Exhibit:

Gilbert suddenly laid his hand over the slender white one lying on the rail of the bridge. His hazel eyes deepened into darkness, his still boyish lips opened to say something of the dream and hope that thrilled his soul. But Anne snatched her hand away and turned quickly. The spell of the dusk was broken for her. “I must go home,” she exclaimed, with a rather overdone carelessness. “Marilla had a headache this afternoon, and I’m sure the twins will be in some dreadful mischief by this time. I really shouldn’t have stayed away so long.” She chattered ceaselessly and inconsequently until they reached the Green Gables lane. Poor Gilbert hardly had a chance to get a word in edgewise.

[Gilbert asks] “And after those four years—what?” “Oh, there’s another bend in the road at their end,” answered Anne lightly. “I’ve no idea what may be around it—I don’t want to have. It’s nicer not to know.

“I wonder if I can ever make her care for me,” he thought, with a pang of self-distrust.

“If I had my way I’d shut everything out of your life but happiness and pleasure, Anne,” said Gilbert in the tone that meant “danger ahead.” “Then you would be very unwise,” rejoined Anne hastily. “I’m sure no life can be properly developed and rounded out without some trial and sorrow—though I suppose it is only when we are pretty comfortable that we admit it. Come—the others have got to the pavilion and are beckoning to us.”

Anne was never attended by the crowd of willing victims who hovered around Philippa’s conquering march through her Freshman year; but there was a lanky, brainy Freshie, a jolly, little, round Sophomore, and a tall, learned Junior who all liked to call at Thirty-eight, St. John’s, and talk over ’ologies and ’isms, as well as lighter subjects, with Anne, in the becushioned parlor of that domicile. Gilbert did not love any of them, and he was exceedingly careful to give none of them the advantage over him by any untimely display of his real feelings Anne-ward.

The only set up we get is this:

Gilbert, to be sure, was still faithful, and waded up to Green Gables every possible evening. But Gilbert’s visits were not what they once were. Anne almost dreaded them. It was very disconcerting to look up in the midst of a sudden silence and find Gilbert’s hazel eyes fixed upon her with a quite unmistakable expression in their grave depths; and it was still more disconcerting to find herself blushing hotly and uncomfortably under his gaze, just as if—just as if—well, it was very embarrassing.

My guess is that based on the paragraph above, Gilbert thought he had a chance - that and his line about how "things can't go on like this any longer." It's still odd to me in the context of the larger pattern of behavior though. Not in a bad way, more in a "tumblr, please provide your thoughts because batrachised's brain cell has quit its job without notice" way

#i am slowly absorbing myself in shirbert #time to dig into this #aogg #anne of the island #anne shirley #gilbert blythe #anne x gilbert

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fairuzfan · 3 months

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Hey, sorry to bother, unsure if you're the best person to ask this but you seem to have a lot of knowledge and a big platform, so..

I saw this post claiming there are no Palestinian Jews, that all the ones in Gaza were forced out and the ones in the west bank are not Palestinians and are actually settlers. So Jews in Palestine have only existed in historical Palestine.

I want to doubt it, because to me it's hard to believe, but I'm not sure... any source you can point me to about this?

https://www.tumblr.com/applesauce42069/740878769339924480/palestinian-jews-are-being-ethnically-cleansed?source=share

This is kind of a reductive argument to have because it ignores the fact that a lot of Palestinian Jews from "Mandate Palestine" (aka, when the british were the colonizers) either were forced out or automatically considered citizens of Israel when Israel came about. So yeah, Palestinian Jews *were* and *are* ethnically cleansed because their status as a "Palestinian Jew" was superseded by Israeli Law and even in modern day I wouldn't be surprised if Jews in Palestine from Palestinian descent still consider themselves Palestinian Jews. I can't say that I know too much about this specifically though. Massoud Hayoun, who is not Palestinian but a North African Jew, talks about how his "arabness" is an essential part of his identity and how colonialism caused him to doubt that part of himself.

But there are Palestinian Jews who still have israeli citizenship and identify as Palestinian or not as Israeli as far as I can tell. Hadar Cohen, who lives in Jerusalem with generations of families from Jerusalem, talks about being an "Arab Jew" which according to Avi Shlaim, the definition of "Arab Jew" is a Jew who lived in an Arab country, which he identifies as, since he was born in Iraq. All this to say I think its a little odd to know how every person identifies in Occupied Palestine (in other words Israel) and make an absolute assertion that "there are no Jewish Palestinians."

As far as I personally know, yes, many, many, if not most, Jews in the west bank are settlers and violently displacing Palestinians. I will never negate that and it's important to recognize that. Many Jews in gaza who were forced to leave Gaza in the 2000's were settlers themselves. But I can't say for certain whether or not ALL of them identified as "Israeli" and not "Palestinian." Jews are automatically subject to Israeli citizenship most of the time. So like yeah there might not be "Non-Israeli" jews in Palestine but theres also a legal framework involved that you can't discount in defining people who "identify" as Israeli.

Also, Palestinian with Israeli citizenship are legally called "Israeli Arabs" so like you have to acknowledge that yeah some people of Palestinian descent consider themselves Israelis but maybe not necessarily because they want to but because they have to. When we say "ethnically cleansed" we mean their identities as PALESTINIAN jews, people who practice and participate in Palestinian society and customs and traditions, were folded into the title of "israeli" with no identification of their Palestinian routes.

This isn't me saying "actually all of the people with Palestinian Jewish ancestry all absolutely identify as Palestinian always" this is me saying perhaps we should consider that not every palestinian jew with israeli citizenship identifies themselves as "israeli" and not "Palestinian." I'm saying this mostly because there's got to be resistance efforts of Palestinian Jews within Israel that I just don't hear about as often. Sim Kern talks about early Palestinian Jewish resistance to zionism. Here is the article they refer to in the video. Is it so weird to think NO Palestinian Jew still resists in Palestine...?

Anyways, there are Palestinian jews in diaspora who are also experiencing ethnic cleansing right now by virtue of being Palestinian and identifying as Palestinian and watching their people die and get pushed out of their land.

to clarify though to really drive it home: MOST of the jews in the west bank are settlers. dont discount that at all. my critique is mostly of how people assume there are no people who identify as palestinian jews in israel at all.

#palestine

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redahlia-writes · 1 year

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only if for a night. | joel miller

Abstract: “It’s midnight,” you whispered, lips tingling with the aftermath of his hungry kisses. He looked down at his wrist, where a watch would be but the skin sat empty, and then turned his head slightly to look at your watch. His mouth was bruised as he licked his lips, a light furrow crossing his brow as if he could not believe the audacity of time to interrupt him. You leaned in - the distance was not really distance, his frame still caging you against the counter - and pressed a quick, almost ridiculously chaste kiss to his cheek. “Happy birthday, sweetheart.”

Words: 5.7K

Content: f!reader; pre-outbreak + post-outbreak, show timeline but references to the game, a lot of kissing, suggestive language but nothing explicit, mentions of child death, mentions of death in general, reader has a broken leg, guilt, angst, a little bit of hurt/comfort, some fluff, joel gets Clingy

A/N: who’s surprised? not me. the original idea was longer but i ended up trying to compress everything in a single one-shot because i have no chill.

also on AO3 - masterlist

feedback is always greatly appreciated. you can send it here, too

September 25, 2003.

Joel’s hand was warm against the small of your back, soothing and electrifying at the same time as he led you from the living room to the kitchen, one last glance over his shoulder in Sarah’s direction.

The girl had fallen asleep on the couch next to him, the movie’s volume getting lower and lower as the night went by, forgotten by all three of you in favor of each other. Sarah kept asking you questions about your job, about your life, poking fun at her father every now and then, and in return he would good-heartedly scold her for being too nosy, tethering the annoying, to which the girl would pout but immediately return her attention to you instead.

You were just glad she’d liked you. Things with Joel hadn’t been going on for long - you’d known about Sarah right away: she was his favorite subject of conversation, his whole face brightening when he mentioned his daughter, and you’d understood it was also his reason for certain boundaries of his - your house, not his; not staying the night; taking things slow.

And then he’d asked you over for dinner, and the girl had told you right away she’d already known of your existence because her father was so gone. Plus Tommy had ratted him out for the one time you’d brought Joel lunch at work - a casual thing, really: he’d mentioned forgetting to pack it for himself during a call and you were gonna pass that way anyways.

“Can’t believe how much that kid manages to humble me,” he muttered, turning his head to look at you. Laughing softly, you drew closer to wrap your arm around his middle, creating a temporary odd tangle of arms before he turned to face you. “You sure you can’t spend the night?” he asked then softly, hands coming up to cradle your face.

Joel’s hands were rough and calloused from his work, but warm and gentle as he touched you. He cupped your jaw, fingers spanning down your neck except for his thumbs, tenderly brushing at your cheeks as you leaned into him. It had been fleeting touches all night, both out of respect and nerves - a quick peck at the door, hands brushing when walking past the other as you got ready for dinner, knees bumping underneath the table, sitting shoulder-to-shoulder on the couch as the movie played and Sarah talked.

“Got an early morning,” you shook your head slowly, movements limited by his insistent touches as he leaned closer or pulled you to him. “I need to go to the hospital for a check-up.”

He groaned softly as you wrapped your arms fully around him - there was no space left between the two of you, his shirt wrinkling against your chest and uncovering a sliver of his skin while the buckle of his belt pressed into the lower part of your stomach. You craned your neck a little to kiss the noise away from his lips.

Joel sighed, chasing your mouth with his - he glanced once more towards the living room from above your shoulder before letting his eyes flutter shut. He dropped one hand to your side, thumbing the hem of your shirt and lifting it slightly, enough so he could slide his hand underneath and caress your bare skin.

Melting against him, you felt your lips part at the mere brush of his tongue across them, fingertips tracing mindless patterns against his back from above his shirt as he moved slowly, turning you both around and backing you further into the room, back and back and back until you were pressed against the kitchen counter, leaning slightly backwards under his weight as he crowded you. In the meantime, with the hand still cupping your jaw, he caressed your neck with his small and ring finger, right over your pulse point.

“Joel Miller,” you reprimanded in a breathless whisper after pulling back, his name slightly muffled by his mouth searching yours right away, making you lean back towards the counter, one elbow resting against the marble surface as you looked up. “Are you trying to get in my pants?”

He grinned, the hand underneath your shirt rising a little in a slow caress. “Is it working?” he wondered quietly, dipping his head again for another kiss. You turned your head, his lips landing on your jaw instead as you scoffed.

“Not with your teenage daughter in the other room, it isn’t,” you warned, another groan leaving him in protest as he trailed his lips down, jaw to neck to a small spot behind your ear he’d found one afternoon by mistake that had you close your eyes with a deep inhale, legs threatening to give out underneath you. “I really like her, Joel, and I really, really really want her to like me and this,” you tapped his back, moving up his spine, “is not the way.”

“She does like you,” he hummed, still nuzzling your neck. “She might even like you more than she does me,” you snorted, detangling your arms from him to wrap them around his shoulders, head tilted to the side - you exposed even more skin to him, and he pressed himself closer.

For a moment longer, you just let him have his way with you. It was easy to succumb to the bliss of his touch, of his lips tracing patterns on your skin back up towards your mouth, to linger in his kiss that went on and on and on until you swore your head was spinning and you were fifteen years younger, teenagers stealing kisses when nobody’s watching. And then you stole a glance towards your watch, wrist resting over his shoulder, and Joel exhaled as you broke the kiss again.

“It’s midnight,” you whispered, lips tingling with the aftermath of his hungry kisses. He looked down at his wrist, where a watch would be but the skin sat empty, and then turned his head slightly to look at your watch. His mouth was bruised as he licked his lips, a light furrow crossing his brow as if he could not believe the audacity of time to interrupt him. You leaned in - the distance was not really distance, his frame still caging you against the counter - and pressed a quick, almost ridiculously chaste kiss to his cheek. “Happy birthday, sweetheart.”

“You kept me up this late on a Thursday night,” he turned to look at you again, both his hands now resting on your sides - one still underneath your shirt that rode up your back, leaving the cold marble to cool your skin down. “Wretched woman,” he accused with mock-sternness, and then looked over his shoulder, arms winding around your middle as he checked that Sarah was still asleep before pulling you up on the counter. “I think I deserve a birthday present for that. Don’t you, darlin’?”

The space was small, leaving you to wrap arms and legs around him as you did your best to not yelp at the sudden shift. Joel grinned, satisfied as you kept him caged between your thighs, his hands slowly trailing down your sides. With his chin tipped up to keep looking at you, in the faint light of the kitchen, you ran your hands gently through his curls, brushing them back from his lovely face.

“How about you let me go home instead,” he began protesting, hands gripping your thighs to pull you to him, as if by getting closer he could melt his very being with yours and keep you there - you shushed him gently, still raking your hands through his hair, down to the nape where the cut was a little ragged. “I’ll call you when I’m done, and we’ll discuss Saturday?”

“Saturday?” he repeated, a small pout crossing his lips. It was difficult to not lean in and kiss it right off of him - it was difficult to focus when he looked at you with those eager, big eyes.

“Yes,” you cupped his jaw, the same way he had with you, small finger curling underneath and scratching lightly at his stubble. “You spend your birthday with your daughter, and then I’m taking you on a date on Saturday. Deal?”

His lips turned in a quick, surprised smile, still looking at you as if the thought of letting go of you was the least appealing thing he could think of at the moment. But his hold on you eased little by little, until his hands were simply resting over your thighs, and when you unhooked your ankles from behind his back he did not protest.

Instead, he leaned in - one last time - and left a lingering kiss to your mouth before pulling back, leaving enough space so you could get off of the counter as he took your hands. A brief brush to your wrist, looking at you with his head slightly tilted before he sighed, almost resigned, and brought your hands to his mouth.

“Deal.”

20 years later, and then some.

There were many things you’d missed from before the outbreak. Traveling. Going out for dinner. Going to the movies. Showers. Baths. Music. The sea.

Painkillers. What you wouldn’t have done for a painkiller as you twisted again on the creaky bed - an actual bed, more than you had had for the past 20 years - attempting to find a position that did not make your leg scream.

The makeshift cast was heavy and uncomfortable, and all you wanted to do was reach inside and scratch until your skin was raw. But each movement sent jolts of pain up your spine, and it was back to missing painkillers.

It was unbearable, making you groan and wish, yet again, for some sleep.

“Hey, Captain Ahab,” a light knock on the door made you screw your eyes shut, head sinking deeper into the pillows. “How are you doin’?” “Screw you, Tommy, I still got both my legs,” albeit one didn’t work.

It had been a surprise, seeing Tommy again after 20 years. You weren’t sure how you’d recognised each other - covered in filth, having seen each other just once before the outbreak - but the name Miller had had every muscle in your body tense as he and Maria brought you within the community and she tended to you. For a week you’d inhabited their house, unable to stand up for longer than ten minutes, the woman forcing you to do so every now and again.

“Is that how you greet an old friend?” he scoffed in mock-offense, then stepped into the room. “I brought you something.”

“Is it Oxycodone? An aspirin? I’ll take anything if -” pulling your head up from the pillows you groaned softly as you spoke, shifting your weight on your elbows to try and sit up - and then froze as you looked towards the doorway. Tommy stood against the wall with a smirk on his face, and on the other side of the door was a girl, looking confused between the two of you and then behind her shoulder.

For the first couple of days, Tommy had kept aside, leaving Maria to help you - it had felt like a reason enough not to ask. Tommy was there in Jackson, and he wasn’t, so of course something had happened, something must have happened, because he wasn’t talking about him, nor had he asked anything, so of course Joel -

Joel.

Twenty years gone by and, grays aside, Joel Miller still looked the same as he stood in the doorway. Almost. Not quite. It was the same face, the same arched nose, the same lips, the same neck and shoulders, if dusted. But his eyes were all wrong - brows knitted, a stern, harsh look, wrinkles at the corners.

And he was staring at her, his lips parted, throat bobbing, hands shaking. Or maybe it was the whole world spinning for you, a distant ringing in your ears and tightening in your chest.

“Joel?” a whisper, incredulous and trembling. Was it the pain? Had it just been a week of hallucinations, and that was it? The final one, the cruel joke of seeing him again, and then it’d be over.

“You -” one word, his voice low and familiar that snuck its way into your chest, wrapping itself around your aching heart. His chin turned towards Tommy, as if he’d intended to look at him, but his eyes stayed on you. “It can’t be.”

Tears and pain blurred your sight as you tumbled out of bed, a protest coming from Tommy as you staggered forward, movements faster than they’d been all week - just a few steps before you felt your injured leg give out, but the ground never came.

A pair of arms wrapped around you to keep you upright, and there was a tightness in Joel’s hold that made you believe you would stop breathing as he squeezed and squeezed and squeezed and your ribs were hurting, too, but it did not matter because it was Joel, and you were clinging to him, fingers and hands brushing every part of him that was available to your touch just to make sure he was real.

“Oh my God,” a prayer, a thanking - you weren’t sure. You weren’t sure God was listening anyway, or that he’d care at all, so it didn’t matter as you buried your head into his neck and sobbed, and perhaps you were trembling against him. On the ground by the door was his backpack, the girl still looking between the two of you with her eyebrows slightly arched, mouth sealed shut.

He smelled awful, like sweat and smoke and that pang of blood that had seemed to permeate everything outside Jackson. But underneath there was Joel, the scent of his skin like a punch right to your stomach, achingly familiar and yet so distant in time. When you pushed your fingers against his back, his muscles shifted, real and surreal at the same time.

“It’s you,” you exhaled at last, and felt the ground vanish from under your good leg as he pulled you up just slightly, just enough to not risk you shifting your weight onto the injured leg. “It’s really you, tell me it’s you. You’re real, aren’t you?” his arms were wound tight around you as you pulled your head back to look at him, reaching for his face.

“Real as it gets, darlin’,” he sighed as you brushed his face, eyes fluttering shut for a moment at your fingers running across his cheeks and temples and up through his hair. “How are you here?”

Tommy was the last thing he still had from life before the outbreak - or so he had thought. When his brother had told him there was someone he might want to see, he hadn’t been able to picture this - you, in his arms again, touching his face and awfully real.

“She got jumped by a group of hunters on her way here, actually,” Tommy called, and the temporary bubble of isolation you’d created around yourselves popped, leaving you suddenly exposed. “Which is why she needs to stay in bed. Leg’s broken,” he added as a warning, nodding towards the bed with its pillows lingering on the edge.

“Tommy -” you protested, but Joel was already moving, carrying you back to the bed - you almost laughed at the absurdity of it all, of Joel being there, of him holding you, of the way he plopped you down on the mattress and knelt between your legs, the uninjured one bending as if to cage him in. You looked away from his brother and back to Joel, hands coming down to brush at his cheeks over and over again, his beard tickling your palms as some of the filth came away under your insistent touch. “Christ, Joel, you -” you breathed out, the ache in your ribs making it all more real with each inhale, exhale. And then you glanced up all-too-quickly, a gasp trapped in your throat. “Where’s Sarah? Is she here?”

Silence was something you’d gotten used to - it was a necessity in the world you lived in. But after a week in Jackson, waking up with people talking and laughing below your window, and music and movies heard faintly from house to house, the sudden quiet felt unnatural and heavy. Tommy’s face dropped first, and he was quick to turn his gaze away, shuffling on his feet and away from the wall. Next to him, the girl frowned, looked over her shoulder and then back at Joel.

Joel - he had been looking at you all the while, and at the mention of his daughter’s name his gaze had just gone unfocused, the hands resting over your thighs clenching and unclenching as his shoulders shook a little. You felt your hands grow cold against his flushed face, the euphoria of seeing him dropping in your stomach and leaving space to dread, because 20 years could make anyone recognise that look that had taken over his darkened eyes.

“Kid, c’mon,” Tommy’s voice was distant, and at the corner of your vision you saw him moving, reaching to rest his hand on the girl’s shoulder - she flinched out of his touch but stepped back, her eyes still glued to the back of Joel’s head. “Ellie, leave them a moment, alright?”

A broken watch sat on Joel’s wrist, the glass shattered, hour hands frozen in time somewhere above the 3 and he kept fidgeting, his jaw shifting under your touch.

“Oh, sweetheart,” you whispered, the all too familiar sting of tears at the corner of your eyes making your eyelids drop. Joel grunted, his mouth sealed shut and nostrils flaring as you bowed your head. His fingers dug into your thigh as he pulled away, turning his head as he slipped out of your hands.

“I’m filthy,” he muttered, slowly sitting back on his heels, escaping your hold and touch altogether. When you looked up at him again, he did not look at you. Shifting at the edge of the bed, you reached for him - he was just out of arm reach, making you lean forward and strain your leg. “Stop that, you’re gonna hurt yourself.”

“Then don’t make me chase after ya,” you called back, resting one hand next to you for support while the other fell to the injured leg, his gaze following the movement as he kept his head bowed. “Look at me, Joel.”

He hesitated. Fingers drumming over his thighs as he clenched his jaw again, the shift barely perceptible - how could someone be so familiar yet look like a total stranger all of a sudden? Holding your breath, you waited, and waited, and when he shifted his chin up just barely you tilted your head to meet his gaze.

“Could you get back here, please?” you murmured, tapping your fingers to the mattress at your side. When he didn’t move, you sighed, leaning forward again. “At the very least get off the floor.”

A moment longer, and then he stood, dusting his knees off as he shuffled on his feet, unsure of where to look - at you, your leg, the window behind you. Rocking side by side, he lingered on the spot until, with his head lowered again, he made his way to your side. The bed creaked when he sat down, mattress dipping slightly with his added weight, and silence fell again.

It stretched on, minutes of quiet interrupted only by the distant sounds from outside - when he didn’t protest your hands resting over his, you interlocked your fingers together, pulling it towards your lap, gaze lowered to the broken watch. His knuckles were bruised as you rubbed your thumb across them, and the shadow of dirt lingered around his nails as he squeezed your hand - once, twice, I’m sorry.

He’d never been one to apologize with words, not even before.

“You said you’d be at the hospital,” he murmured after a while, his eyes cast down again. It was odd, seeing the contrast of your almost too-clean hands against his. “That day - you weren’t home, were you?”

“No,” you shook your head, kneading your thumb into the palm of his hand. He sighed, turning his head ever so slightly to focus on the movement. “I was trying to get back home when they closed everything - city was losing it, communications were jammed. Ended up making that road-trip I told you about,” he scoffed, daring a gaze up towards your face.

“California?”

“Too far. Made it to Laredo though, and then my car died - there was a shelter in San Agustin. Held up a few years, but patrols at the border were insane, and the Rio Grande attracted the infected,” you shrugged as Joel slowly turned in your direction. “Then I heard about this place and I thought - why not? Might as well try,” he began returning your touches, thumb tracing the small scars and scabs that had formed across your knuckles, Joel’s hands were rough and calloused, but warm and gentle as he touched you. “Got to Houston, then New Orleans and then up North to here. Almost made it all in one piece,” you tapped your free hand to the cast, groaning softly. “Could’ve been worse.”

“On your own?” at last he looked up fully, and it was difficult to focus on the rest of the conversation when you met his gaze. It was difficult to realize he was no longer your Joel, that as much as the past years had changed you, they’d changed him even more.

Your Joel lingered there, far behind the cloud in his eyes, and the rigidity of his posture - you wondered if his shoulder still bothered him, or if, like many, he’d simply learned to live with the pain and didn’t pay it any mind anymore. He was still so far away.

“Small groups, never more than four, never more than a few months - but we covered each other’s back,” fidgeting, you squeezed his hand. “Last stretch was on my own, hence the leg. I believe I owe Tommy my life.”

“That’s rough - don’t let him hear that,” he attempted a smile, perhaps reassuring, but the corners of his mouth twitched - up and then down, a little frown almost vanishing underneath his beard. “I think I was hoping he would’ve told you already.”

“He didn’t even tell me you were alive. When I saw him here and not you I just assumed -” you hesitated, drawing your bottom lip between your teeth with a shuddering breath. You leaned in slowly, bringing his hand up towards your face, resting your cheek to his knuckles while looking up at him. “I’m so sorry, Joel.”

“She asked about you, that night,” he cleared his throat, carefully swiping his thumb over your cheekbone. “Almost made us drive back to get you,” he lowered his gaze to the bittersweet smile tugging at your lips, turning his hand so that he was cupping your jaw, your own hand falling to his wrist, right underneath the watch. “A soldier shot at us while we were trying to get away.”

“Christ -” “It’s been 20 years, it’s not -”

“Don’t do that,” you squeezed his wrist, cutting him off. “It’s me, sweetheart. Talk to me.”

“I can’t,” while he didn’t snap, and his touch was still gentle, Joel’s voice was firmer. Somewhat colder. Lips pressed together, you pulled your head up, breaking the skin-on-skin contact - his fingers curled at the absence, gaze flickering between the empty space and your eyes, shaking his head lightly. “I can’t,” he repeated, a little breathless.

“Joel,” a whisper, pleading. He was so close to you, yet he could still have been miles and cities away - it could’ve still been any day of the past 20 years spent in unawareness.

“Are you both decent?” a call from outside the door, down the corridor, Tommy’s steps louder than they needed to be.

“Joel, please,” you whispered again, clutching his hand as his jaw clenched.

“Yeah,” he called right back, standing from the bed in spite of your hold on him only tightening. “I’ll be right out.”

“Joel,” he broke free from you easily, his palms tingling in his absence.

The last time you’d seen each other, you hadn’t known that could be it. He’d kissed you, smiled at you, walked you to the door and kissed you again, keeping you a little longer from getting into your car. He’d watched you go with a grin on his face and his cheeks flushed.

That bye had not felt final - his later now did, awfully final and definitive, pushing the air from your lungs when he turned his back on you. You’d gotten used to goodbyes, but seeing Joel go was dizzying and painful, and the tears returned unprompted as soon as he was gone.

It was late at night when the floorboards creaked - still used to being on edge at all times, you pulled your head up and reached for the nightstand, reaching for your sheathed knife.

“It’s me, darlin’,” Joel’s voice was a rough whisper, and in the faint moonlight you managed to make out his shape. “Just me.”

You lowered the weapon slowly, the noise seemingly echoing throughout the house before you turned on the light and squinted towards him. He stood in the doorway, hands half-way lifted, washed down and in new clothes that clearly belonged to his brother.

“What are you doing here?” you sat up to face him, weighing on your hands placed behind your back. He shuffled on the spot, lowering his hands and tugging at the sleeves of his shirt.

“I’m leaving tomorrow, first thing in the mornin’,” he murmured, gaze lowered to the knife rather than towards your face. “Gotta take Ellie someplace, but -”

You waited in silence, looking at him look anywhere but in your direction, his lips parting and closing, parting and closing, searching either for air or words, you weren’t sure - but you waited. Joel Miller needed time - the very thing you’d believed was not an option anymore, but that Jackson made seem possible. Though a part of you believed that, for Joel, you’d have waited three more apocalypses and then some.

“I didn't like the idea of leaving the way I was,” he said then - one step forward, lingered.

“Without saying goodbye?” you offered, head tilting slightly to the side. “Without even lookin’ at you.”

Your lips parted for a moment, taken aback - it was a snapshot of the old Joel, the one you used to know, a thread of light in the darkness of the past 20 years. Not smiling, but almost grinning, looking at you the way he used to. For a moment you’d believed nothing in this life could surprise you anymore, and Joel Miller had proven you wrong twice in a day.

“I’m leaving tomorrow,” he repeated, his voice lower as he took another step forward - his hands twitched at his sides. The watch was still there, still broken. “But I can’t sleep, because you’re right here, and it somehow feels like I’m dreaming.”

“I would’ve preferred if you dreamt about me with both my legs working,” you scoffed, leaning back - a half-sitting, half-lying down position. He chuckled, the sound devoid of proper humor, and reached the side of the bed. “Walk around, Miller. This hurts bad enough without you accidentally bumping into it,” you warned, gesturing towards your leg.

He kicked off his shoes at the foot of the bed as he went around, the last few steps quiet before he sat at your side, bed dipping under his weight. He hesitated a moment longer, watching at the corner of his eye as you settled back down against the pillows and opened your arms - suddenly it was homecoming.

Joel wrapped himself around you, head resting over your shoulder (it would grow numb through the night, but you didn’t mind it that much, or at all). One arm draped across your stomach and the other tucked underneath your back, he tucked you closer and sighed raggedly when you brushed the back of his neck, a soft, gentle caress up to his hair.

“I should’ve come looking for you. Sarah would’ve told me to,” he choked up on her name, squeezing your ribs a little, pressing himself almost harshly against your side. “Had I known you were still out there, then maybe -”

“You didn’t know, Joel,” you brushed your hand through his hair, and his head followed the movement as you looked down towards him. Up close, with the faint light on the nightstand, you could see his eyes - dilated pupils, wrinkles at the corners, dark shadows underneath. “We cannot afford to have regrets in the world we live in. It’s difficult enough to survive already.”

“But you did,” he murmured, shifting a little higher on the bed.

“Yes,” bringing your free hand to his face, you ran the tip of your fingers over his beard, the gentle scratch against your pads a reminder that it was real. He was. “So did you.”

“Not so sure about that,” he muttered, gaze flickering away.

You grabbed his face then, thumb and middle finger pushing into his cheeks to guide his head back until he was looking at you again. He blinked rapidly, slightly taken aback, a sharp exhale flaring his nostrils.

“You’re still alive,” each word was enunciated slowly, soft-voiced. Joel flinched, throat bobbing. “And it sucks that Sarah isn’t. It’s unfair, and stupid, and nothing will ever make the knowledge go away, or make it easier, I know,” he tried to shift back, a slight quiver in his mouth before he pressed his lips in a tight line, your arm around his shoulder keeping him in place. “Wouldn’t she have wanted you to survive, too? To live?”

Of course, the response came immediately to him, but there was a tightness in his throat and he was afraid that if he opened his mouth the last 20 years would catch up on him. So instead he just nodded, slowly, and the hold on his face eased - he buried himself into the crook of your neck, feeling the shift of your ribs as you inhaled slowly and wrapped both arms around him.

“Having survived is not a fault,” the hold on you tightened furthermore at the whisper against the top of his head. “Don’t blame yourself for it, sweetheart.”

The bed shook with his exhale - part sigh, part sob, gripping you so tightly it almost hurt. One of his hands dragged down your side, to where your shirt had crumpled up, and he pressed his fingers directly against your skin - he was still warm as you remembered.

“It shouldn’t surprise me that you managed to keep your humanity after all, should it?” when he spoke, his beard tickled your collarbones, a gentle shudder running down your spine.

You wanted to say that it was not the case, that it was difficult each day, that sometimes you felt more inhuman than the infected probably were, a wretched creature hanging on by a thread - but that would mean admitting how often you’d thought of him, of Sarah, to find your sanity again. How, each city you got to, you hoped to catch a glimpse of them. How you prayed that the Jackson community was real, and that they’d be there.

“I’ve missed you, darlin’,” Joel filled in the silence, his lips brushing your skin almost by accident. “How am I supposed to leave you again?”

You wondered briefly if he’d meant to say that out loud.

“You didn’t leave me, Joel,” running your hand through his hair again, you felt him shift closer, part of him now over you - could you stay like this forever? Could he mold himself around you and never let go of you? “And you’re not leaving me now.”

“I have to go,” he said softly, nosing at your jaw. A small smile crept up across your lips, unwilling and unaware, eyes fluttering shut at his gentle nuzzling. “I can’t leave Ellie now.”

“I know,” you nodded - pieces of information pieced together between Tommy and Maria as they came and went through your room, knowing the man at your side had grown to care for the girl but wouldn’t admit it just yet. “But you’ll come back to me. You do what you gotta do and then you’ll come back to me, Joel Miller - and I’ll be here waiting, because I still owe you a date,” he chuckled, leaving a quick peck to your neck that made you sigh. “Deal?”

Joel lifted his head, planting his elbow between the two of you on the bed for leverage, and looked down at you at last - the light from the nightstand was feeble, casting shadows across your face as he brought his free hand away from your side and up, tip of his fingers tracing a line up your throat and jaw until he was cradling your face. His thumb brushed across the apple of your cheek, tender and slow, while his small and ring finger curled at the side of your neck.

He could feel your pulse jumping underneath his touch, a mute question in his eyes.

A nod was all he needed before he was leaning in, shifting up higher on the bed until the tip of his nose bumped yours - once, twice, your warm breath caressing his mouth as you rested both hands on his shoulders and then up, up the curve of his neck. He closed the gap between your mouths in the next breath, his lips oddly gentle against yours, almost tentative.

One moment, two, and then your bodies recognized the other, and with a sigh Joel was kissing you as if no time had passed, pressing himself against you with need and desperation, and your lips parted for him as you locked him in your embrace where he would spend the night.

One kiss after the other until your lips felt numb and you almost laughed, ignoring the dread creeping up your spine because it was this one night, with no certainty of what came next. It was easy to pretend it’d be forever - to bask in the bliss of his touch, of his lips on yours, on your neck tracing patterns on your skin and back up towards your mouth, to linger in his kiss that went on and on and on until you swore your head was spinning and you were thirty-five years younger, teenagers stealing kisses when nobody’s watching.

When he pulled away, you could’ve sworn outside it sounded like morning, and you held onto him a little tighter, a little longer, drinking in his whispered reply.

“Deal.”

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