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dumblr · 2 years

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The problem isn't your friends not showing up and supporting you. The real issue is you keep calling them your friends.

#quotes #feelings #facts #friendship quotes #life quote #social problems #supporting #emotions #thoughtful #real issues #sad but true #real friends #true friendship #dumblr

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religion-is-a-mental-illness · 8 months

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"Much of what are called 'social problems' consists of the fact that intellectuals have theories that do not fit the real world. From this they conclude that it is the real world which is wrong and needs changing." -- Thomas Sowell

Mostly because ivory tower academics - such as DiAngelo, Kendi, Butler, Crenshaw and others - have never actually lived in the real world, much less study it.

The social theories that plague us today are essentially arguments from ignorance.

#Thomas Sowell #social theory #social problems #equity #religion is a mental illness

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euesworld · 9 months

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"Walking down the street, I see so many people in need.. it's crazy how many people in the world need help. But in a crazy world like this, it's hard to tell who really needs it.. there are shifters and grifters all about. There are people with problems, and some with so much more than that.. there is kindness around every corner, people smiling.. you can hear their laughs. There are people that are angry, people consumed with sadness.. and people oblivious to it all. Who's to say who needs the help? Really now? Which ones are the one's that truly need help? It's hard to say, cause I think we could all use a little help now and again.."

Everyone has their time of need, it's up to us to be their humanity.. we are all in this together - eUë

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mapsofinnerspace · 6 months

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So I just read this somewhere on LinkedIn, haven’t stopped crying. Why?

Because all of this is nonexistent in my country.

Because I recently lost an awesome job opportunity just because the managers were illogically clung to the idea of the position being 100% on-site, even if it wasn’t a customer facing one, and even if the office was located in an overly conflictive and dangerous area, and my working shift would end at 9 pm.

I told them my concern, and they chose to increase the base salary instead of changing their minds about switching to remote working. Even when this position was 100% remote in all other countries they have presence at.

Even when the recruiter and the director himself interviewed me from the comfort of their homes in Italy and Latvia at weird evening times.

And this is too stupid.

In all the jobs I’ve had so far, my colleagues from other countries always work remotely. My local team and I are the stupid ones who have to go to the office at least two or three times a week. It doesn’t matter which company it is, or what kind of position it is about. We always, ALWAYS have to go to an office.

This is particularly traumatic for me (yes, TRAUMATIC) in a city like this, located in the third world. One of the most chaotic cities on the planet, with the worst traffic and deficient, slow, and inadequate public transportation systems where a major disaster happens every year. Where you can spend two hours trying to cover a 10 km distance.

This is one of the dirtiest cities in the world, with the highest levels of environmental pollution, litter in the streets and broken sidewalks that, if you’re not careful enough, you can step on and fall to the ground or into an open sewer. This is one of the cities with the worst rates of violent crime on the streets, countless kidnappings, rapings and femicides, and rampant drug and people trafficking.

And natural disasters. Yes, we do have rainstorms, floods and winds for most part of the year, along with incoherent temperature changes. And.. overly strong earthquakes from time to time (7-8+ degrees of magnitude) that can happen as you’re commuting to the office in the middle of the traffic at peak hours, or as you’re packed like a sardine in the underground, or at the 15th floor in the office, or inside their elevator with 10 strangers around you. Plus, we have too many hurricanes from both ocean sides, and volcano ashes that worsen my asthma, for which is recommended to stay indoors.

Well.. for me, having to commute to an office every fucking day has turned my work life into a nightmare, into something tremendously traumatic, depressive and deteriorating. Even more so because of the need to force myself to socialize in office settings, wearing uncomfortable clothing that makes me feel like a clown, surrounded by people from a backward and poor culture where they only watch Televisa soap operas as kids. A culture of nosy and gossipy people who don’t respect personal space nor personal boundaries, people who excessively use physical contact in unnecessary ways.. who are envious, jealous, classist, racist, misogynistic, and terribly competitive. People who instead of valuing my strengths and helping me overcome my weaknesses, chooses to see me as a threat, as a rival that has to be put down and eliminated. People that come from a nepotistic culture of laziness who do everything half-heartedly and get everything in life by being either the boot-licker of the boss, or simply friends or family with someone with power and influence in the company.

So why does remote work hardly ever exist here? First, because of the local culture. People from this damn country don’t know how to exist without being surrounded by others. They don’t know how to be by themselves, nor how to work without being micromanaged and without gossiping against each other, like the telenovelas they watch. And second, because this is a petrol based country, where petrol extraction and supply is controlled by the government and therefore, they need to sell gasoline at all costs. Having a mostly remote national workforce would kill their fuel business, so they do everything they can to promote on-site work by hindering laws.

My life.. it would be totally different today if there were remote job opportunities in this shitty country. Having a remote job would have allowed me to move to a better country already, as a digital nomad.. a country that has a better infrastructure, better laws, better services, better geographical conditions, and most importantly.. a better culture.

So here it is.. the text from LinkedIn..

“Remote work does not mean Work from Home (WFH)

Remote work means Work from Anywhere (WFA)

Here are a few other things it means:

1) It means not being handcuffed to an expensive city with a high cost of living.

2) It means access to the best opportunities from where you live your best life.

3) It means flexibility to work when you are most productive, not a rigid 9-to-6 shift.

4) It means anywhere is your office: a cafe in Paris, co-working in Melbourne.

5) It means trust & responsibility, with a culture of accountability and initiative.

6) It means a greener lifestyle, reducing carbon footprint, eliminating useless commutes.

7) It means improving your health & well-being instead of 2H a day commuting.

8) It means being a global citizen: colleagues of different cultures & time zones.

9) It means not having to choose between a fulfilling career or life: you get both.

10) It means breakfast with your spouse before work & dinner with kids at night.

11) It means being there for a family member who is dying of an illnesses.

12) It means quick adaptation to new technology, staying ahead of digital trends.

13) It means focusing on results and outcomes that matter rather than clocking hours.

14) It means removing the stress and anxiety that can come with office senseless politics.

15) It means having your ideal work environment to foster your creativity & focus.

16) It means doing the best, most meaningful, impactful work of your life.

17) It means seeing your kids walk, laugh & talk for the first time.

18) It means creating a more inclusive and diverse workforce.

Actually, remote work is the future of living!

It's about upgrading quality of life for billions of workers & their families globally.”

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jungledgeorge · 1 year

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My relationship with twitter atm

#twitter #mental problems #social problems

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usersh · 7 months

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Özüm daxil olmaqla, 20-li yaşları içində olduğumuz hadisələrlə yaşayan hamı üçün məyusluq hissi keçirirəm. 90’lar olmaq pandemiyadan tutmuş, müharibə ağrı-acıları, inflyasiyayadək hər şeyi 20’li yaşları hədər verərək yaşamaq imiş. 90-ların məhdud imkanları ilə indinin sərhədsiz imkan və texnologiyasının arasında sıxışıb qalan gənclik keçirmişik, keçiririk.

Belə ki, bütün bu problemlərin içində heç insanın vicdanı öz dərdləri üçün də dərd çəkə bilmək “lüks”ünə sahib deyil. Duyğular, hisslər - bunlar axırıncı plandadır. Öncəliklər mövzusunda qət edəcəyimiz yol uzundur.

Lakin bir də bu illəri bizə heç kim geri verməyəcək. Çətinliklərlə boğuşaraq qazandığımız uğurları da heç kim bəh-bəhlə alqışlamayacaq, asanddan ayırd etməyəcək. Çünki, insanlıq üçün həmişə proses yox nəticə əhəmiyyət kəsb edib.

#social problems #90lar #gənclik

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voids-ideas · 1 month

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The moment when I realized that my political views were "drastic" was when we were discussing the death penalty and my argument against it was "I don't trust a state to have the power to create a category of people worthy of death and not twist that definition to eliminate groups of their convenience" and the people around me looked at me with a face like: Wtf are you saying?

#I'm so fucking happy that you can trust them. But I can't #Note because almost every time I give a political opinion people assume that: No. I'm not from the US #my only connection to them is those times when they come to try to manipulate the government here #aka: The Universal Fucking Experience.#culture #politics #lgbtq #social problems #jay and social views

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femmespoiled · 1 year

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while I'm discussing books, I'll say, the notions that knowledge should be accessible to everybody regardless of capital and that writers, artists, creators should be rewarded for their work and all they do for society should and need to coexist

#random stuff #social problems #and I'll always prioritise accessibility to knowledge. if you're able to help a creator. please do. but understand. +#education is a human right and so is access to knowledge #and this should be addressed with more libraries. more social programs. SPECIALLY MORE LIBRARIES #''books need to be expensive because it's the author's work'' get the fuck out of here

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dumblr · 1 year

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Put your problems on Instagram story, they will disappear after 24 hours.

#quotes #instagram #personal problems #feelings #emotions #wise words #thoughtful #true story #try it yourself #its working #social problems #life quotes #dumblr

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veyoux · 1 year

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okay tumblr, we should talk about polish preselections for eurovision contest.

as some of you may have heard, polish “national” (that is — political biased) tv station faked the results. i can assure you it’s highly possible. the audacity of polish politicians is so disturbing, they think that polish society is blind and won’t notice what they’re doing — taking away our freedom and rights. we wanted a brave, original candidate, someone who could really represent us — the oppressed and devastated people of XXI century (not mentioning the terrible situation in our neighbour’s country, praying for Ukraine).

TIME TO SAID IT LOUD!!

in poland we are being ashamed and abused BY THE GOVERNMENT because of

— having different look

— being disabled

— having different sexuality

— having different religion

— having different opinion

— being a woman

— not being ready to give birth and wanting abortion

AND MANY MORE THINGS. IT’S TRUE PEOPLE, I LIVE IN THIS COUNTRY AND HAVE OPEN EYES. WE HAVE NEVER HAD THE PRIDE MONTH, THE GOVERNMENT OUTLAWED ABORTION, DON’T SUPPORT DISABLED PEOPLE (OR SICK PEOPLE, LIKE HAEMOPHILIACS), THE MINISTER OF EDUCATION HATES ON WOMEN ON LIVE TV, AND THE FCKING SHTYY CLOWN WHO RUNS THIS COUNTRY DARES TO LAUGH AT TRANSGENDER PEOPLE! NOT MENTIONING CATHOLIC CHURCH STEALING MONEY FROM OUR BUDGET!!!

it’s sick that we still agree to that nonsense! but our contribution to fair competition is truly amazing. after the eurovision preselections had been frauded, we stood against fakers. we are sympathising with each other in order to fight for the right choices and honest decisions. that’s truly amazing because we mostly are great people, really close to each other when we have the same goal. and right now our goal is justice.

please, don’t hate on all polish people. be aware of the situation we’re living in. it’s hard but it’s great to know that there are still many people ready to fight for justice

#poland #polish #eurovision #preselection #eurovision contest #eurowizja #polska #preselekcje do eurowizji #tumblr #social problems

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kanna-kizuchi-enjoyer · 2 years

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The more I talk to other people about my mental health, the more I realize I'm not healthy

#mental health #emotional abuse #verbal abuse #social problems #social anxiety #fear of failure #fear of abandonment #fear of confrontation #fear of dogs #father issues #toxic father #toxic #hate #scared

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religion-is-a-mental-illness · 4 months

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What Representing Men in Divorce Taught Me About Fatherhood | Marilyn York

I'm six years old, and all I can think about is getting the pink Barbie Corvette! I need five more dollars. Luckily for me, it's Easter, and I know that my dad always hides one coveted five-dollar egg. I also know the best egg is the hardest to find.

This year, I'm ready! Before long, I spot it, right in the middle of my sweet '70s swing set pole! You know, the one that runs along the entire top of the set. I scramble to get the ladder and the yardstick and duct tape it to a broom handle.

I fish it into the pipe, and I shove at it hard. It flies out the other side, and by the time it hits the ground, I'm waiting above it like an expectant father.

The egg cracks open and inside … is the very opposite of my grand prize. Instead, a perfectly formed dog turd rolls out.

I burst into loud hysterics. At the same time, my father explodes with laughter. I run as fast as I can to my room, but he's not far behind.

It's time for one of his talks. "Honey, it was clear that you already learned the important life lesson: the harder you work, the better the payoff. So, it was time that you learned another valuable lesson: sometimes, no matter how hard you work, you just end up with shit!"

And who better to teach just this sort of hard-hitting, direct, and painful life lesson to six-year-old me than my father?

I'm a divorce attorney. I've been practicing for over 20 years. I began in Los Angeles, but I've owned my firm in Nevada since 2001. My firm has a particular sub-specialty: men's rights. My nine female employees and I specifically represent men in divorce and custody battles.

And guess who runs the business end of my law firm? My father.

In my practice, we've represented over 2,000 men, 650 of whom are fathers.

My expertise not only comes from my career but just as much from my personal life. I'm a mother. My children are 23, 15, 12, and barely 3. They come from two different mothers and three different fathers. Hooker!

Let me explain. I helped my ex-husband raise our 23-year-old son, whom I didn't birth, from age 5. I share custody of my 15-year-old daughter with the same father. My 12-year-old son sadly lost his father to suicide when he was just 7. And my 3-year-old is being raised at home with his father and me. I literally live my work every day!

So, what has 20 years of representing men in family law while living my own reality show as a wife, mother, and daughter taught me about fatherhood?

Allow me, if you will, to start with the second thing I learned about fatherhood: men parent differently than women. Big surprise! But their influence is crucial in the development of their children. Do you know any mom in the world who would put dog shit in an Easter egg?

Okay, maybe that's a good thing. Let me better demonstrate this point from my legal experience.

When getting my father clients ready for court, I prepare them for this kind of interrogation:

"Who's your children's doctor or dentist?"

"What's the name of your school principal or even their teacher?"

"What grades did they get on their last report card?"

Nine times out of ten, they miss the majority of these questions. Seriously. Does this mean they don't care or love their children as much? I bet it makes you wonder.

But please, hold your judgement. Here are the questions that my father clients can easily answer:

"If your son could be a superhero, what would his power be?"

"What kind of monsters do your kids fear?"

"How high does your daughter feel comfortable flying in a swing?"

"What makes your son feel defeated?"

Yet, in my experience cross-examining hundreds of mothers in family court, these are the harder questions for them.

Most of us know, motherhood brings with it a sixth sense and an unspoken bond to our children. But what about fathers? Even fathers feel insecure about this reality. After representing 650 fathers, I can count on one hand those that felt secure in their instinctive role and significance to their children.

What's interesting is my anecdotal legal experience suggests otherwise. In 20 years of practice, I've had over 100 men take a paternity test - like Jerry Springer. Seriously. Do you know how many were wrong in predicting their biological relation to the child? Two.

This shocked me and taught me my third lesson: fathers, too, have a genetic bond and instinct about their children from infancy.

Forget where you are for a moment, seriously, and close your eyes. I'd like to ask you to feel. Think about your childhood. Picture your father, his smiling eyes, his strong hands. Hear his deep voice. What did you love about your dad? Did he throw you high into the air? Teach you to ride a bike? Carry you home when you got hurt? Push you when you tried to give up? What did it feel like to have a daddy? Secure? Fun? Challenging?

Now, go back in your memories and erase your father from every scene. This is what the other 40 percent of people's childhoods look like.

Just under half the people listening to me, including my own 12-year-old son, felt sad, angry, or blank during the peak of your joy, while playing along. Eye-opening, isn't it?

Nearly two of every five children in America are growing up without their fathers, or 17 million, according to the 2016 census. Other sources estimate as many as 30 million.

In 2011, I joined the board for a local charity called Nevada Youth Empowerment Project, or NYEP. NYEP is a housing program for homeless girls ages 18 to 24. As board president of this small charity, I've been closely involved and gotten to know the girls and their tragic stories over the years. Hundreds of otherwise homeless girls have come to our program. Their backgrounds and what they have endured would haunt you.

Do you know the one thing all of these girls have in common? They all come from fatherless homes. Sadly, these girls aren't the exception; they're the rule.

My fourth lesson about fatherhood came from the data. According to the Center for Disease Control, children from fatherless homes account for 90 percent of all homeless and runaway kids, 71 percent of high school dropouts, and 63 percent of youth suicides.

While you listen to me speak, you have to be wondering, "What makes fathers so crucial?" Honestly, the answer is complex and better explored by psychologists. What I can tell you is that the data unequivocally tells us fathers are vital and yet laws and society undervalue their importance, making it harder for them to be in their children's lives. Even fathers underrate their own value.

I know this data upsets a lot of mothers, me included. But advocating for fathers isn't about diminishing mothers.

While children deserve both parents whenever possible, this crisis is specific to fathers. The occurrence of fatherlessness is epidemic, the effects are catastrophic, and the causes are male gender specific.

Nearly 30 years ago, leading child psychologist Michael Lamb reminded us: "Fathers are the forgotten contributors to child development." Yet, researchers have found that children with involved fathers have stronger cognitive and motor skills, elevated physical and mental health, become better problem solvers, and are more confident, curious, and empathetic.

Sadly, we've had this data for 30 years, and fatherlessness has only continued to rise during this time.

The main contributors to fatherlessness are divorce and out-of-wedlock births. Every 13 seconds, someone in America gets divorced. That equates to almost 2.5 million divorces a year. Lucky me!

Currently, more than 40 percent, or 1.5 million babies, are born out of wedlock each year in the US.

And this brings me back to the first and most significant thing that my career has taught me about fatherhood: family court is one of the critical places where fathers are disadvantaged, and this hurts kids.

Historically, this maternal preference was solidified in the tender years doctrine, which mandated custody of children under age four be awarded to mothers. This doctrine was in use until the 80's.

As the laws progressed, visitation for fathers improved, but it took a lot of years before the law was finally gender equal. In fact, it wasn't until 2017 that Nevada finally adopted a presumption for joint physical custody.

When I began my practice, and until 10 years ago, the best my father clients could expect was every-other-weekend visitation and maybe a dinner on the off week. While significant legal progress has been made, this long-standing bias against fathers still occurs in the enforcement of custody orders, in child support rulings, and it exists in paternity laws.

All the while, the number of kids growing up without dads continues to rise. Between 1960 and 2016, the percentage of children growing up with just mothers nearly tripled, from 8 to 23 percent.

Paternity laws desperately need more reform to protect the 40 percent of children born out of wedlock each year in the US.

Right now, once custody has been ordered, it's illegal to remove a child from their father - usually a felony. But it's perfectly legal, in all 50 states, for a woman to conceal her pregnancy, leave the father's name off the birth certificate, and never tell him he has a child, ever! How is this not kidnapping?

Just as horrible, a woman can knowingly list the wrong father in a child's birth certificate, deceive him, and a short while later, in many states, the wrong man becomes that child's legal father forever. He's obligated to a child that isn't his. And that child just lost their real father with little to no recourse. This is a betrayal of the worst kind. And the law not only allows it, it creates the opportunity.

This is what we know. Every bit of data we have tells us children need their fathers! The law, its application, and society at large disfavor fathers. The law is improving, but the statistics are not.

So, what can you do? We are the change makers, all of us.

If you're a father, make the effort, do everything you can to be in your children's daily lives.

If you're a mother, encourage and facilitate the relationship between your children and their father instead of trying to interfere or control it.

If you're a child, spend time with your dad, ask him to do something, seek his advice and guidance.

If you're an employer, grant the fathers you employ the ability to be at their children's events, to help in their schools, to take sick days to care for their kids.

If you work in the legal field, help us continue to progress, change the laws, and ensure that they're enforced to protect fathers and their children.

The importance of this pursuit cannot be overstated. The fate of nearly half of America's children depends on it.

I'd like to close by asking all of you to do one final thing. Please, stand if you are able or raise your hand - I'm serious, please - if you grew up without a father, if you raised or are raising a child without a father, or if you are a father who's been separated from your child.

Now, look around: the people really affected by fatherlessness. Really, look. Those of you standing and raising your hands aren't numbers. You're real living and feeling humans. You're the children scarred by fatherlessness.

Now let me tell you who can't stand.

The 1,000 fatherless children who were murdered last year.

The 3,000 fatherless children who died from drugs.

The 3,200 fatherless children who committed suicide last year.

And the 14,000 fatherless children who were incarcerated.

Everyone, please, stand for them! And do everything you can to help the remaining 17 million fatherless children avoid these fates.

Thank you.

The statistics on fatherlessness and the impact on development and society as a whole are remarkable. And we've known about them for decades.

https://www.baltimoresun.com/opinion/bs-xpm-2014-10-08-bs-ed-child-custody-20141008-story.html

The negative impact on our children is dramatic. For instance, according to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, the U.S. Department of Justice and the U.S. Census Bureau, children raised by single parents account for: • 63 percent of teen suicides, • 70 percent of juveniles in state-operated institutions, • 71 percent of high school dropouts, • 75 percent of children in chemical abuse centers, • 85 percent of those in prison, • 85 percent of children who exhibit behavioral disorders • And 90 percent of homeless and runaway children.

If you worked on just fatherlessness, you'd do more good for kids - including and especially black kids - than any bogus woke "systemic racism" campaigns.

[ Source: Pew Research ]

Of course, activists don't want to do anything, both because it undermines their grand oppression narrative by admitting that there are other problems, and because it means the problem could actually recede and make their activism and ideology obsolete.

You might wonder who would be against shared parenting by default. NOW, the National Organization for Women, has spent decades fighting shared parenting bills.

"[Presumptive joint custody] creates an unparalleled opportunity for belligerent former spouses to carry on their personal agendas or vendettas through the children -- and with the blessing of the courts." -- NOW Executive Vice President Kim Gandy.

That is, fathers only want custody of their children to harass and control their ex. According to the experience of an activist.

#Marilyn York #fatherlessness #fatherhood #fatherless #divorce #father's rights #parenthood #social issues #social problems #equal parenting #religion is a mental illness

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