#so she embraced that but won't ANYONE do that to merlin | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

redtaylorsversiongirlie · 2 years

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we'll never have sex again - s.b.

summary; after having sex with sirius countless times, you decide it's time to come out.

warnings; asexual y/n, talking about sex, angst ig

a/n; months ago, i had my first sexual interraction and i wasn't completely ready to do something. unfortunately, i was too scared to say "no". i was scared they would break up with me. i'm telling you this because it's important to know that if your partner would be mad at you for not wanting to do anything sexual, they are not worth it. look after yourself, i love you all!

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it's not that it didn't feel good, it felt really good. but you just. . . didn't want to do it, to the point you ft yourself being at the edge of tears when sirius was making love to you.

you were tired of lying to him, making excuses whenever he starts kissing your neck and his hands moves in between your legs. it was hard, but you would rather suffer than experience a heartbreak.

sirius was someone who made you feel safe and loved (excluding the sex part). but a part of you thought and believed he would break up with you if you came out to him as asexual. or maybe he wouldn't, but, as your past boyfriends, he would ask if he can sleep with other girls when not with you. that's something you wouldn't want to.

mary knew about everything. and as always, after you came down to the common room with a sad face as you bit the inside of your cheek to hold back tears.

you sat down next to her on the couch and leaned your head against her shoulder, letting the tears fall.

"i don't know if i can continue," you whispered.

she shook her head and answered honestly, "you can't."

you laughed through tears. "geez, thanks."

"that's not what i meant," she lifted your head, took it in her hands and wiped your tears. "you need to tell him. it's ruining you, we can't have that."

you sighed. "but i love him."

"and he loves you," mary assured you. "he won't break up with you because of that and if he will, i swear to merlin he will suffer."

you smiled, knowing she will keep her promise. "thank you. i don't what i would do without you."

she gave you a warm embrace. "i'm always here for you," she paused. "will you talk to him, then?"

"tommorow," you nodded. "he's sleeping now."

you were ready.

***

when you arrived to the boys' dormitory, sirius was already there, alone, waiting for you.

"oh, hello!" he smiled brightly. "how is my best girl doing?"

"good," you sat down next to him on his bed and kissed his cheek.

sirius kissed your lips. you liked that. his kisses were always full of passion and love. and lust, but you tried to ignore that part.

his hands moved to your waist as he placed his hot lips on your jawline and then neck. your heart began beating faster because of how nervous you were. when he tugged at the white shirt of yours, you stood up, deciding it is the time tp say something.

"i can't."

he raised an eyebrow. "you can't what?"

"i can't have sex." you shook your head. "i mean, i can, but i don't want to, okay? i don't want to have sex. now and never."

"okay."

you furrowed your eyebrows. "what do you mean by 'okay'? haven't you been listening to me? i don't feel sexually attracted to you or to anyone. therefore, i don't want to have sex. i'm asexual, okay?"

he stood up and nodded. "okay."

you inhaled and exhaled deeply. "so if you want to break up with me, better do it now."

his eyes widened. "what? no, i don't want to break up."

"you don't?"

he shook his head. "no. i'm very proud of you that you decided to tell me and i'm very sorry we had sex before when you didn't feel comfortable with it."

"oh, no that's not your fault."

"i know, but still," he kisses your forehead and hugged you tightly. "so, do you want to sneak out to the kitchens and eat everything until we feel like vomiting?"

#harry potter #harry potter imagine #marauders #marauders imagine #moony wormtail padfoot and prongs #harry potter x reader #sirius black #sirius black fluff #sirius black imagine #sirius black angst #sirius black x you #sirius black x reader

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ferretandtheweasel · 3 years

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Ginny:

What the heck was his problem? No seriously, Ginny Weasley wanted to know. Granted, she was in the wrong class (by mistake, mind you!) and she was just as embarrassed as anyone would have been in her situation but that hardly warranted the scornful look he had on his face upon seeing her. She wasn't exactly thrilled to be in Malfoy's company either, Merlin knew the memory of that day tortured her as much as it annoyed him but she didn't go around acting disdainful towards him. Okay sure, it had been a brief connection, eye to eye, steely grey met her own honey brown, but his look stung her in her chest for some reason, it was a look accusing her of being in the same room as him, as if she wanted that! Leaving potions class, after quickly making apologies before Snape could use her momentary blunder to take points off of Gryffindor, she tried to make sense of her dilemma.

So yeah, why was Malfoy being an utter twat, more than usual, you ask? Well, it all came down to that one fateful day when she was out with her class in the forbidden forest. Dumbledore had announced a compulsory program for year 4 and aboves, they were meant to form groups and with teachers' supervision, would have to spend 5 days learning camping skills. Apparently the ministry of magic thought that students had become too "lazy" and needed more outdoor activities. She didn't even know what Draco was doing there in the first place since his class was supposed to have their camping exercise later but who cares now. All she remembers is that somehow she'd walked right into him sitting near a lake reading a book. And before you ask, she was initially going to ignore him and walk back to the camp, because believe it or not she wasn't particularly interested in talking to him, plus she had wandered off a bit too far in her search for food, and she wanted to go back to her friends when he spotted her and made a rude comment.

Here's the thing you should know about Ginny Weasley, she had that infamous Weasley temper (which she's working on, come on now give a girl a break please), but yeah she can get exceptionally hot headed when she's hungry... and she was very hungry that day hunting for food, so she may have been particularly nasty towards him and may have said something about his upbringing. Listen, he was rude first, she just returned the favour. That kind of started their age old tradition of insulting each other and somehow she and Malfoy ended up in close proximity, somewhere during their shouting match. She doesn't really remember how but it's possible that she may have been the one to shove him first, in her defense, he had insulted her mother's annual Weasley jumpers so she had to do something. That is definitely how both she and him, ended up in the lake and here's the thing, she kinda doesn't recall much of what happened afterwards, because he did look like a snack alright. It's because his white shirt was wet and it was see through, so she had a moment of weakness, may her ancestors forgive her. So yeah, she may have looked at him a certain way, but he was at fault too, he was giving her looks that did things to her heart and elsewhere in her body, his cool silver locks fell over his molten grey eyes and she was sure her heart probably stopped beating at the sight. She can't explain it.

Merlin knew that moment is exactly where her mind was wandering off to, when today she had accidentally, walked into professor Snape's potion lecture when she was meant to be attending charms for year 6 in a different building! No no no, this would not do. Ginny would have to take control of her mind that kept wandering to that day- ugh! There it was again, she was trying NOT to think about it but somehow the memory of Draco's soft lips descending upon hers, his slender hands slowly making their way down her body, her arms pulling him closer and their tongues locking in a passionate embrace.... yeah, that memory won't leave her alone.

It... It felt like he'd done something to her, like that kiss had changed something fundamental in her, she couldn't look in the mirror without thinking of his kiss. She could still imagine it, picture it, taste it even if she closed her eyes long enough... It felt as though he had tattooed that kiss on her lips and it will never go away.

The point is, yeah, she had been affected by that sudden kiss, but she wasn't going around the school being grumpy and passing him dirty looks. She was feeling tortured inside but she was acting indifferent and trying her hardest to forget everything that had transpired between them because unlike a certain irritating man, she didn't want people to suspect anything. She was sure he was disgusted by their kiss, but could he act more mature about everything please? Because she was trying her hardest to ignore him but his constant remarks every time they crossed paths, his eyes which dug holes in her back and his scathing looks were making it very difficult for Ginny Weasley to forget what they'd done in forbidden forest.

Just last evening she was trying her hardest to concentrate on her homework in the library, she had to read each sentence several times to get it through her head, that's how much Malfoy's presence had started to affect her. As she was trying and failing to concentrate, a loud thud from the other table rang throughout the quiet room, making everyone snap their heads in his direction. Malfoy was grumpily packing his books to leave the the library, giving her a murderous look as if everything was her fault somehow he left. She wished things could go back to normal somehow, but what was normal for them, ignoring each other? Or going back at each others throats? It was all very confusing.

Draco:

Merlin! She was doing this on purpose wasn't she, "accidentally" walked into potions, yeah right! How was he supposed to forget the mistake they'd made if she kept showing up everywhere, looking like... that! What was wrong with him? She must have put some kind of spell on him to torment him. Yes, that made sense, because why else on Merlin's earth would he, Draco Malfoy, find her agreeable. It was worse, he found her more than agreeable, those damn red hair, they enchanted him how they flew with the wind as she rode her broom during a match or when they partially covered her face in the dining hall while she would talk to her friends, tempting him to abandon all common sense and run his fingers through them to tuck them behind her ears. Fascinating, how those silky strands danced on her button nose when she was working on her homework in the library until she ended up putting them in a messy bun, which made her look adora— Mental!

She looked mental, she was a weasel afterall. Draco was frustrated, he was tired and most importantly he was angry, how was it that one kiss, one moment of relapse in judgement on his part could change things between him and a nobody like her so much so that here he was, all rewired somehow sitting in potions thinking about her red hair!! Was this how it was going to be from now on, she would just walk into a room and just like that, all logical thoughts in his mind would go out of the window, he would be transported to that singular moment of his life when her honey brown eyes looked up at him right after their kiss, in surprise and... shock. When she had moved her fingers to touch her lips in astonishment, innocent brown eyes looking up to him in confusion, hesitation, wonder? and then they had heard Pansy calling out for him which had made them both snap back into reality. Within moments, they were out of the lake, unspoken agreement that whatever happened, didn't happen.

And now here he was days, weeks later trying his best to be the old Draco, except it seemed like he didn't know what in the name of Salazar he was supposed do in a situation like this? All he knew was that she was suddenly everywhere, in the dining hall, on school premises, in the quidditch training pitch but most importantly, on his mind! That was the worst place she had occupied, it made it impossible for him to function anywhere. She had ruined his peaceful quiet reading spot because he couldn't go there anymore without thinking back to what they did, without imagining 'what if' scenarios, what if Pansy hadn't come to looking for him? What if Ginny wasn't a Weasley, what if he wasn't a Malfoy? Merlin! His ancestors were all probably rolling in their graves right about now.

"Weasley's sure got a nice arse"

Crabbe's loud observation almost made him want to hex the guy but miraculously, at the last minute his self preservation skills kicked in and he was able to keep his cool. He wished Ron Weasley had heard it right now, he would not only shut them up but also provide quality entertainment while doing so. Seriously, if Merlin was about to put him through Crabbe and Goyle's disgusting comments about Ginny Weasley's arse then, he would have no other option but to jump from the astronomy tower maybe, because no way in hell was he going to sit here as Crabbe and Goyle discussed her. Besides, her arse was just okay, like it wasn't all that special or anything. It wasn't big or small, just the normal size... if he was forced to comment on it, he would say it was pert, well-shaped probably because of all the quidditch training she did, it was perfectly round and firm, and frankly speaking, made to fit right in his palms. It wasn't his attraction speaking, no, it was just an objective fact that her arse fits in his hands, he knew that because he'd had the chance to grab it when they had kissed that day. Of their own accord, His hands itched to do touch her again —

"Woah, relax mate, you're gonna break that thing."

Draco looked at where Blaise was pointing and realised he was about to snap the beaker full of potion, he relaxed his hands and exhaled a sigh he didn't know he had been holding. What was that bint doing to him, he was going insane. Zabini didn't press him on what was going on and he was grateful for that. Instead he read more instructions and kept on working on THEIR class project, something they were supposed to do together! Had Draco not been so out of focus lately he would have helped out, but as it happened, a certain foul-mouthed, red-haired, brown-eyed gryffindor was on his mind and everything in life was upside down.

When Draco and Ginny fall into a lake in the forbidden forest, it ends up in an unexpected event. One moment they're arguing, honouring their ancestral family rivalry... the next they're locked in a passionate embrace neither saw coming. What happens now? Where do they go from here? How the heck did it even happen? Merlin, help them.

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