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uhhhhyandere · 4 years

Note

I love, love, love you ❤️ I was hoping I could request where the main character begs for Yandere Light to let her get a doggo bc she’s so lonely since he made her quit a job. Like full on having a full ass fit. I’m talking full blown brat shit. Just how he would react and what she would have to do to convince him if you catch that drift 😏😉

yeah, i know what i said in my last post. whatever. never believe anything that comes out of my stupid mouth i am the single biggest sob in the universe.

um… i took this in a… direction to say the least. someone has to stop me from riding suck n’ ride smut bc… it always goes like this.

next light smut there is going to be ass-eating or i swear to god my name isn’t kerry literally all im thinking about is giving him a rimjob. really. this is where we are at folks.

warnings: smut, face fucking (oops), dick sucking, sex, rough sex. he not happy boi

word count: 3.5k

All you did was watch dog videos anymore. Of course, you watched them because you literally had little else to do during the day, but you just… happened to be more open about it when Light came through the door. Did it have anything to do with the fact you’ve been thinking about getting a furry friend to keep you company from the silence of an empty house and the dark recesses of your mind?

No, of course not. It had nothing at all to do with it, and it certainly had nothing to do with the fact that if you ask him directly, he would say no before any more words could breach the air. You would have to be creative, because when Light said “no,” there was no more argument, and you wanted this argument.

“A Pug. Wow. Beautiful.”

“Look, it’s a—it’s a Corgi. Oh my—wow. That’s amazing.”

You’d play around with different sizes.

“This Mastiff? This gentle giant? Can do nothing wrong.”

“This Bichon matches with the snow!”

And you’d talk about listings you just happened to see online from the local shelters.

“This one—wow. All of her shots. She looks so nice. Oh, and potty trained! What a girl. Damn.”

“He’s sitting down—oh a paw. I see a paw. Can he do the other paw? Oh, yes he can. Also has all his shots. Wonderful.”

Considering the man you lived with, you were pretty positive that he figured out your intentions day one or day two max. It’s been about a week since you’ve been… outgoing in your interest. At this point, it was a game as to who would break first. You bet he was waiting for you to get annoyed with his ignoring of anything you said related to the subject with how blatant he was with shirking you off, forcing you to simply ask.

You weren’t going to make it so easy on him. Though he happened to be the king of hiding his emotions, you knew you had to be getting to him. Light would never admit it, and he would certainly never show it. He wanted to keep that satisfaction as far away from you as possible.

So, you turned up the heat.

Before, you would break off the dog topic after a time, wanting to etch it in your daily schedule only bits at a time. Now? It’s the only thing you talk about, no matter the actual subject at hand.

“There’s another event we have to—.”

“The animal shelter is having an event in the park next week for adoptions.”

“I’m going to have to go for groceries soon.”

“Look at this weenie dog dressed in a weenie costume.”

“I—.”

“Doggo cute.”

It was only a matter of time until—.

“This French Bulldog is—.”

“Y/N.” His voice was clear, demanding. Even after all this time, like a teacher scolding elementary students, it immediately brought you to silence. You sat on your shared bed, legs crossed, as he leered down at you from the bathroom. “I would say it was cute at first, but you know it’s a waste of time to try asking anything indirectly. As if I would succumb to your manipulation, but I let you carry on. You would get bored. You would stop and think and realize that it was pointless to keep it up, but you persisted. I thought to myself maybe you were just trying to see if I would crack and give you the satisfaction of indulging in your antics, and I was right.

“It begs the question. Why didn’t you just ask directly? Easy. Because I would say no, and you would be correct. To allow something else besides me your devotion? Not likely. But what? Did you think showing me videos of Shibu Inus and Pomeranians would make me want one first? You have the logic of a six-year-old, Y/N,” Light began to unbutton his shirt, “Did you honestly think it would work? Or did you simply want to get a rise out of me?” He removed the shirt entirely, then lifted his undershirt over his head just as easily. Light tossed the fabric into the hamper, leaving a pale, lithe abdomen on display. He turned to fully face you and took two easy steps forward. “Why would you want one in the first place? Have I not given my fiancée enough attention recently? Is this your way of getting back at me, hm?”

You were almost at an even height to his belt buckle, but you did your best to ignore that as his eyes demanded attention upwards. His gaze was near malicious, but not quite so. Ah. Lascivious. That’s what they were. You swallowed the knot out of your throat.

“Y-you wish.”

“Your hesitation is very resounding. Then, if you’re so sure, indulge me. Don’t tell me you wanted a distraction from your loving husband-to-be. I know you didn’t want something else to focus on besides me when I’m away at work, so tell me. Tell me why you desired a filthy, shedding ball of fur. Your answer may earn you some mercy.”

You unfolded your legs from underneath you as your foot began to numb under the weight of your leg. Your hands glided back and forth on your thighs. Was there a point in lying? No, scratch that. Was there a point in lying to someone who already knew the truth? Well, his own truth that Light would undoubtedly make yours. There was little purpose in making it worse on yourself.

“No, you’re—uh—right.” Light set his hands on his hips.

“Oh?”

“Yeah, I’m just… lonely when you’re at work. So… yeah.” You risked a peek upwards. Oh, geez the smirk on that fucker. “I’m sorry.” His arms rose from his hips to cross over his chest.

“For?”

“Huh?”

“What are you sorry for? Annoying me for days with your drivel? Wanting a mutt? Lying?” You furrowed your brows. “Oh, that one confused you, hm? Alright, well, if you won’t admit it, I can do it for you. Lonely-“ he scoffed- “You can’t be serious. Such a blatant lie from your lips. The second time you are insulting my intelligence. I’ll ask one more time. Where does your motivation lie?”

“I’m not lying!” You hissed, jumping off the mattress to stand. “What—just what am I supposed to do all day cooped up in this place like a goddamned prisoner? Clean? The place is clean. Cook? As if you’d even let me try. Watch TV? My brain is rotting. You don’t even let me help kids with math anymore online. Just what am I to do? Next thing I may just throw myself out the window—,” Hands gripped your shoulders, causing a slight pain at the intensity.

“You think I’d let you? I expect you to stay here and be good and thankful that you are where you are. I, just as much as you, know—knew women who died to be in your shoes, and you’re ungrateful to be alive and safe? You want more?” You tried to shrug out of his grip, and he allowed you to take the steps away from him.

“I’m asking to be a human being, for fuck’s sake! I’m going to sit here and go crazy. Isn’t it enough that I don’t fuck with the rules anymore? I’m quiet. I don’t say anything. I put every façade you ask me to. All I want is something for me! Something to distract me from literally going insane here! To distract me from everything.”

Light’s eyes sometimes spoke more truth than his mouth ever could. Right about now, the browns were all-consuming, aflame with ire, but his lips were upturned in a challenge.

“A distraction. Caught in a lie, Y/N. Bad form, even for you. After all this time, you still can’t face reality, dearest. I knew you’ve been pitting your mind in some gutter you call the truth. Makes this all easier to accept, but to go to the physical extent? I won’t allow it, and you won’t be able to recess your mind for long, so enjoy that pleasure while you can.” He paused, countenance recessing to something more composed. “You love me, don’t you, Y/N?”

“Yes.” There was no hesitation, no lie in that affirmation. It was the easiest of his questions to answer. “I love you.” Light inhaled deeply, chest flexing with the exhale.

“With love comes compromise, correct?” You responded with a glare. His tone was all too insinuating. “So, let’s compromise, yes? I hate arguing with you.” He reached an arm out, hand open. Your eyes glanced between the extended limb and his eyes before cautiously taking it. His hand squeezed and pulled you in tight. Light twisted and adjusted you so when he fell onto the bed, you landed comfortably on his lap. Releasing your hand, he brought his own up to gingerly glide his fingers across your cheek, a trail of bumps in its wake as it curled into your locks. Almost like a lover. Almost.

His fingers seized the strands and pulled, forcing your head back and opening your neck for his mouth to latch. “Then compromise, dearest. Prove to me what you think you deserve.” He spoke against your skin, open-mouth kisses with a hint of teeth between his words. “And I’ll make judgement.” His hand let go of your hair and traced to the back of your skull to slant your lips onto his impatient ones. The other wrapped itself to pull your body closer until he pushed you off with an unexpected force, almost knocking you to the ground.

From the unbalanced position, you watched him adjust his position to lie in the center of the bed, head angled to watch you from the pillows with both his hands as another cushion for his crown. Light smirked, watching you stand straight. “Well, go on. Compromise.”

Light was never on the bottom. It was non-negotiable. Being anything else was utterly unacceptable for a god. This situation, despite the physical placement of both bodies, was no different. You may be the one crawling on top of him, fiddling with his belt buckle, but he had every bit of this situation in his control. Under his watchful gaze, you removed the strip of leather and threw it across the room.

“You’re going to have to help me here,” you muttered after undoing the fly. Wordlessly, he obliged, allowing you to slip the trousers off of his person. You glanced at his feet. Thank god he took his shoes off already, so he only lied in his boxers.

No, you would never be accustomed to this.

“You always look like it’s your first time,” he remarked. “As if you haven’t seen my cock before. From my recollection, you should be quite familiar with it by now.” You inhaled sharply. “Unless you don’t want to compro—.”

“Shut up,” you hissed, crawling to straddle his legs. “Just be quiet,” you said more quietly. You reached out to rub the only half-erect cock through the fabric. Only small groans were elicited above you. Light was not a noisy one, to say the least. It took your first, painful, terrible experience of deep-throating to even get him to moan fully.

“Do you think teasing is going to get you anywhere?” His voice is always composed during sex, and it really was alarming because… you really couldn’t relate. You glowered, fingers digging under the waistband and pulling. He helped again, lifting so you can get the fabric off. “If you think you’re doing anything fully clothed, I should take a cold shower.”

You made quick work of taking the layers of comfort clothes you had on, off. “You really know how to put on a show,” he deadpanned.

“Shut. Up.” You returned to your position, seeing his cock now fully erect from your previous work. You were sure you were wet, but you ignored it as best you could. You had a feeling you would not be serviced tonight. Before you can even lean down, he spoke again.

“Beg for it. Beg for the honor of sucking my cock. Convince me you deserve it if you believe you are so entitled.” There was not a single physical restriction to keep you from taking it into your mouth, but his words were powerful enough to keep you still. Light was daring you to try and misbehave, and you really couldn’t help the physical reaction his words always do to you.

“Please—,”

“Pathetic. I can have any girl in my bed. I can stick my cock in any person interested, and here you are, an ungrateful brat who wants more. You’re making quite an unremarkable argument for yourself. Perhaps I will take away—.”

“Please, Light. Allow me the honor of sucking your cock, of you fucking my throat. I want the privilege of swallowing your seed. Fuck—please. I’ll do anything.” You leaned down close, but not touching anything. You only lifted your eyes up to his. “Please. I know I’ve been bad. Please, let me make up for it.”

Your words in bed were always forced. He knew you hated dirty talk as much as you did, therefore he always made you speak, always made you confess how much you craved him, wanted him, and whenever you spoke it was hardly ever in lies. Your embarrassment was too prominent in your body language to tell him otherwise.

“Go on, then. Show me.” You licked up his length first, then around the head and back down. “Teasing will get you nowhere,” he repeated. You resisted the urge to roll your eyes and took him in, inch by inch. Light was incredibly average despite his ego. It wasn’t impossible to fit the entire length into your mouth with slow adjustment, but that didn’t mean it was fun. You would continue to work his length, getting more and less intense with your pressure and the speed your head bobbed. Still, there was little reaction from him, not there really never was any mind the grunts you could make out. Your inclinations to keep going, and you did until you pulled back.

“How’s—,” His hand was at the back of your head immediately, forcing your head back down, pushing his cock down your throat, pushing until you could feel his balls against your chin. No hair. He was pristine down there. You convulsed, gagged, choked, but he did not release his grip. Hand keeping its hold, he dragged your head up just a hair enough to thrust upwards. Water began to pool at the waterline of your eyes. You had to relax your throat, or this was going to be just worse.

But it was hard, so hard at the pace he was thrusting at. You squeezed your eyes shut and took it the best you can. Listening to his quiet grunts and groans, you forced your lips to continue covering your teeth, but you could not force your throat to loosen. Drool pooled at both sides of your mouth, carelessly falling into both him and the sheets along with the liquid of your tears.

“Your throat is so fucking tight. That’s it. Choke on my cock. This is what your dirty mouth deserves.” Your limited experience could be to blame for its restricting. That, or the selfishness of the man whose grip on your hair tightened even more right before he allowed you to breathe once more.

And breath you did. Gasping, reeling for air as drool continued to leak down. From beneath your hair, you looked at Light, his eyes wild and alive with lust. Small heaves from his smiling mouth mixed with your wet and heavy ones. “Do you think you deserved that, dearest?” You finally wiped your mouth and shook the spit from your arm. “You’re lucky I am so generous. Come. For doing such a decent job.” His hands patted his hips. Swollen eyes met his. “Ride me, before I change my mind and fuck you into the mattress.”

Regaining some semblance of control, you moved to straddle his length. “Oh, your pussy is glistening. Did me fucking your throat really do that much to you? You loved to be controlled, don’t you?” You did not answer, shaky hands guiding his cock so you can sink onto it. You groaned at the feeling. “Tell me how good it makes you feel. How only I can make you feel like this.” You bit your lip, sinking down another inch or so.

“God, Light. Your cock feels so good. Only yours can make me feel like this. No one—no man, no woman, no person—can make me feel anything—like—this—fuck!” You sunk down to the hilt before you lifted yourself again, easing yourself up and down his length. “It’s so good—so good.” Light allowed you more time but decided your gentle pace was not enough to soothe him. He roughly grabbed you and flipped your positions.

“Too slow, Y/N. What did I say about teasing?” He brought his hips back and then snapped them into yours. You screamed, and you wondered if the neighbors would call again, but his pace did not relent.

“Light—please. It’s too—too much! It’s too fast. I can’t…” He smiled, a wicked grin over you.

“And you won’t. Don’t you dare think about cumming. I decided you don’t deserve it. This is your compromise. You get to live, marry, and get fucked by me, and only by me, and I will only have eyes for you. You’ll never feel like you need a… distraction again.” You clenched your teeth and pushed your head farther into the pillows. “I feel you clenching onto me. Don’t you dare think about disobeying me.” His thrusts were even, balanced.

“Please, please, please let me cum. It feels too good. You feel too good. I’ll do anything.”

“Then don’t cum.” You threw your hands back and gripped the headboard, feeling it rock in rhythm to his thrusts. They were beginning to become, sloppy, wild, he was close while you were holding back for dear life. “Y/N. You are mine and mine alone. Your body. Your actions. Your mind. I am the only thing you are allowed to think about.” With one final push, his seed released, filling and coating your insides. He rode it out, making sure every drop stayed. He hated to have to wash the sheets after, though your drool stains remained.

Pulling out, he retreated and stood, ignoring your writing, unfulfilled form. “Come. You aren’t going to sleep like—get those hands away from there. Let’s get you clean before you ruin the sheets even more.” Like before, he extended his hand to your heaving form. “Alright, alright, I’ll take care of you, but you need to get cleaned up first.” An unstable hand fit into his own. His gently pulled you to stand and allowed you to lean your weight onto his.

Hot water cascaded down your body. Though Light effortlessly scrubbed washed his hair, you could not bring yourself to match his speed, and by the time he was already done, you hadn’t even washed your body yet. You heard an incomprehensible mutter amidst the running water as he left you alone. He was washing his face as you finally emerged, wrapped in your towel. No romance tonight, you figured. Not that it was any different than any other night. You followed, brushing your teeth, washing your face, and taking your pills while he huddled in bed.

You could only dream of romance anymore. Getting your pajamas on, you approached the empty side of the bed. Before you could get on, Light shifted, opening his arms and staring at you expectantly. You froze. Did… did he want…? “Well, come on.” Ah. Was this supposed to be the ‘I’ll take care of you,’ he mentioned earlier? You supposed he would never wash you in the shower, so this would have to be it. You swallowed and fell into them, feeling his arm wrap you close to him so you lied nearly on your stomach, face buried in the crook between his neck and shoulders. His arm lied around your neck, the other near your elbow on the arm that sprawled on his chest. Oh, hello? What is this?

Ah. This is the quote-on-quote, attention he promised as a fiancé. His eyes remained closed as you stared. How forced was this? You wondered if he hated it, if he saw it was succumbing to your wishes, but it was unlikely. Perhaps it was him showing the physical love outside of sex that you lacked thinking it would keep you from having another outburst as you did before. Him keeping his side of the compromise so you would keep yours.

You allowed yourself to close your eyes before you thought too hard about his actions. The more you thought about it, the more—and less—real it all became, but if he was offering more conventional couple things: cuddling, dates, attention, you would not pose another argument.

“So, no dog?” you whispered.

#yandere light yagami #yandere light yagami x reader #yandere death note #light yagami x reader #reader insert #yandere reader insert #yandere x you #yandere x reader #uh oh spaghettio #tw: yandere #tw yandere

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bratkook · 4 years

Text

clairvoyant. (m) part nine.

masterlist

pairing: jungkook x reader , taehyung x reader

word count: 13k

warnings: lots of crying, mentions of sex, but nothing scandalous happens

author’s note: let me know what you think, i live off feedback and attention no cap lmaoo also this series is almost over and im upset and forcing myself to not drag it on

Jungkook is sat hunched on his bed, his feet dangling in front of him as his eyes focused on the floor. The sound of Taehyung slamming the dorm room shut made him flinch slightly, his body finally relaxing now that his room mate was gone.

He slumped back on the bed, his head nearly missing the wall behind him as he settled back into his sheets. He wiped his sweaty palms on his sweats, shutting his eyes and trying to calm his racing heart.

Taehyung had just chewed his ass out, he had been holding it in after you told him what had happened between you, Jungkook, and his stupid friend. You hadn’t meant to say anything at all but when you and Yoongi made it into your room Taehyung was already waiting there, taking note of your flustered appearance and thats when the questioning commenced. You had tried to play it down but with the way Yoongi looked Taehyung knew whatever happened had hurt you.

For the next few days Taehyung had just given Jungkook the silent treatment, ignoring when Jungkook asked him innocent questions or made small talk. Taehyung was petty, leaving the drawers to Jungkooks desk pulled out so Jungkook would ram his knee into them when he entered the room, not closing their room door fully when he left in the morning so Jungkook would have to decide if he wanted to drown out the noise of the hallway with his pillow or haul himself out of bed to shut it.

The last thing he had done was unplug his phone from the charger, successfully letting his phone die in order for the alarm to not wake him up on time for the class Taehyung knew he shared with you. Luckily Jungkook’s internal alarm had woke him up and that had apparently been the tipping point for Taehyung, his quick words and low jabs coming out and succeeding in wounding him.

Jungkook had never seen Taehyung as scary, or intimidating but the malice in his eyes as he tore him a new one made a fear creep up his spine. Never had he thought Taehyung was a violent man but when he had given him an open ended threat of not wanting to see him near you Jungkook decided that Taehyung was in fact very scary.

All the younger one could do was sit there and take it, refusing to make eye contact and silently praying that he wouldn’t get decked because even though Jungkook was buff he was also completely clueless on how to fight. His muscles were useless and he didn’t think he’d have it in him to even fight back if Taehyung swung first so when Tae stormed out it was a blessing.

A shuddering breath left him and before he knew it he was crying, his hands balling into fists as he felt the hot tears stream down his face. A small whine left his lips as he tried to get himself to stop crying like a fucking child, one of his fists slamming into the mattress beside him.

“Get yourself together.” His voice strained, aggressively wiping at the tears on his face as he sat up in bed again. His chest hiccuping and a few more tears slipping past his lashes. He had been holding that down for a while, not wanting to cry when Taehyung was there & still having some dignity left to not cry in the shower but he couldn’t sit here and act like he was the victim.

Jungkook took a deep inhale before standing up, going to his desk and swiping at his computers trackpad to see the time since his phone was lying dead on the desk. It was 7:30, Taehyung had apparently decided to become a morning person in order to tell him off.

He stared at his screen for another moment, he had half an hour to get ready for your shared class and he was dreading it. He had only seen you once since what happened but thanks to the fact that you had this class twice a week he was going to have to relive it again today. It didn’t help his nerves, seeing you ignore him entirely as you walked past his seat to go up to yours just made him want to fix everything.

Taehyungs threat still rung in his mind but considering that his friends words had been the reason he was in this predicament he decided that if Taehyung wanted to beat his ass then so be it.

He had made peace with the possibility of getting jumped by Taehyung, and possibly Yoongi as well because he seemed like the type to fight to kill if his friends needed him too.

He could feel the dark cloud of dread creeping up on him as he approached the cafe he had been avoiding, he had to suck it up and face it in order to do what he wanted. The cafe door felt like it weighed a thousand pounds as he pulled it open, the warmth of the building hitting his face, the smell of coffee making him realize how much he missed his morning cup.

Jungkook patiently waited in line, his eyes peeking behind the counter and thanking whoever was responsible for Jisoo not being on the clock. He ordered himself his typical americano, ordering your drink of choice as well, an iced coffee with white mocha and half and half, something he used to get you on the regular, before making his way to class.

His phone was still lying on his desk, charging this time, so he hoped he was early enough to class to be able to leave your drink without having to actually talk to you.

When he makes it past the students huddled around the door his eyes scan the upper row, sighing in relief when he doesn’t spot you in your seat. Jungkook sets his cup and backpack down at his desk, going up the steps until he reaches the last row. Jackson is sat at his seat next to yours, a very confused look on his face when he sees Jungkook approaching.

“Sorry dude, seats taken.” His reaches over, spreading his palm over the expanse of the desk top.

Jungkook hesitates as he holds the iced coffee, “Oh, yeah I know. This–uh, this is for Y/N.” Jackson relaxes at that, his hand coming back to rest on his own desk and a smile on his face, “Damn, I don’t get one too?”

Once again Jungkook blanks and his classmate takes pity on him, letting out a laugh, “I’m just teasing you. I’ll let her know you left it.”

“Okay.” He sighs, rolling his lips together as he sets the drink down, “I’ll just, uh, leave this here.”

He doesn’t wait for a response, nervously skipping down the stairs and sliding into his seat, his head immediately downcast and focusing on the shiny surface of his desk.

When you walk in its like he can sense it, his body tensing up, desperately wishing he had his phone so he could fiddle with it and not look as nervous as he feels. He spares a glance up at you when you pass his seat, seeing you with an oversized university hoodie and your hair in its natural state, your attention very clearly not on him.

As you walk up the steps you spot the iced coffee on your desk, smiling when you slide into your seat and turning towards Jackson, “Did you buy me this?”

Your hands grasp the cup, stirring the straw to properly mix the half and half into your drink and thats when you spot the black scribbling on the side. Jungkook being the name scrawled into your cup and you freeze.

“You wish I bought you coffee.” Jackson jokes, “Freshman dude got it for you.” He points down at Jungkook and he can feel the back of his head burning from the attention. This was a bad idea, why did he do this?

Your heart betrays you as it swells in your chest but you’re stronger than this, only letting yourself take a tiny sip, okay a gulp, before getting up from your seat. The ice in your drink rattles together as you clench it on your way down the steps, the class is filling up but the professor hasn’t walked in yet so you don’t draw attention to yourself.

Jungkook holds his breath when he hears your shoes against the floor, seeing you appear from the corner of his eye and he thinks you’re gonna talk to him but you keep walking until you’re stood by the teachers desk, right in front of him.

Thats when he properly looks up, his eyes widening when he sees you staring straight at him until you look down at the trashcan by the desk and drop your drink into there with a wet thunk. Your eyes meet his again and see the clear sadness in them, but again you’re stronger than this. A fucking iced coffee is not going to be his method to fix this, he had hurt you and if he wanted to make amends he was gonna have to try harder than this.

Jungkook crumbles under your stare, choosing to focus on his hands fidgeting on top of his desk as you went back to your seat.

Jackson sat there slack jawed, turning to you with wide eyes when you sat back down, “I fucking knew you had it out for him, you still sure you don’t want me to set him straight?”

Jungkook hears that too, sinking further into his seat and thanking his luck that the professor chooses now to walk in, saving him from having to hear an answer to Jacksons question.

The rest of your day continues without a hitch, the practice exercises you had to do in your lighting studio class taking up your brain and letting you forget about the coffee dumping incident of this morning.

You exit your building and your hair gets swept up by the cold wind, your hands wrapping around it and holding it down. Taehyung spots you rewrapping your scarf and pushes off the building he was resting on, he was absolutely freezing as he waited for your final class of the day to end but he had grown to like seeing you at this hour. He approaches you, his smile hidden behind his own scarf but the way his eyes crinkle up let you know he’s grinning at your struggle.

When he reaches out and grabs the ends of the scarf you give up, letting him wrap the material around your neck twice until its fully protected from the cold air.

“Thanks.” You mumble out, accepting the kiss he gives you and smiling when he lifts up the edge of the scarf to cover your lips.

“You’re welcome, how was class?”

He reaches into his pockets and pulls out a pack of hand warmers, giving you one that you clutch onto as he wraps his arm around you to pull you in for extra warmth.

“Good, every time I leave this class my love for natural lighting grows. I fucking hate soft boxes, like I get it, totally essential or whatever but nothing and I mean nothing will ever top the beauty of golden hour.”

Taehyung chuckles at your mini rant, another smile spreading across his face when you wrap both hands around his waist and give him a gentle squeeze. The position has you both waddling awkwardly towards your building but he doesn’t care.

You had yet to clarify what your feelings meant but Taehyung didn’t care, he was a patient man, especially when it came to you. He had told you how he felt and now the ball was in your court, whatever you chose to do with that information was okay with him but with the way you’re holding onto him like you don’t wanna let go, you don’t blame him for hoping you want the same as him.

“Golden hours when the suns kinda setting and everything is like glowing almost right?”

You hum against him, your chin resting on his chest as you look up at him and smile, “Yes, exactly right. The prettiest almost magical portraits come from that lighting.”

He grins right back down at you, pressing a kiss to your forehead, “Teach me how to take photos one day, I wanna take a pretty almost magical portrait of you to make it my lock screen.”

He had been saying things like that often now and it just made you blush, not used to hearing Taehyung say such mushy cute things, the cute things you were accustomed to him saying was him calling you a twinkie as he stared at his cum leak out of you. It definitely took some getting used to, for sure.

“Sure, maybe you can replace the canvas of your ass with a picture of me instead.”

He laughs loudly as he remembers something, “I just might, Namjoon finally told me I had to cover up my ass or take it down because one of the students complained when he saw it one day. I currently have some post it notes over my butt cheeks as a compromise. I’m sure a photo of you would be nicer to stare at too it’ll give Jungkook a nice reminder to back off.”

You separate from him as you both enter your building, waving at Joy and entering your elevator, his hands being quick to grasp yours almost as if he just needed to keep touching you. “What do you mean?”

He clears his throat awkwardly, leading the way out of the elevator and towards your room, “I kinda...went off on him this morning?”

You gasp at him as you open up your door, waving at Wendy as you both step inside and start taking off your scarves and coats, “Taehyung, why?”

He gives you an innocent shrug, getting comfy on your bed and patting the space beside him so you can snuggle up, which you immediately do, “Im sorry, I was pissed okay. Theres no excuse for what him or his friends did and he has to know that acting like that is gonna get him his ass handed to him one day.”

The groan you let out just makes him laugh, especially when you bury your head on his chest. He wraps his arms around you, fingers raking through your hair as his eyes meet Wendys, shes smiling as she works on her laptop and he smiles back at her before looking back down at you when your head peaks up again.

“Is that why he did what he did this morning.” You speak more to yourself but Taehyung frowns, “What did he do?”

“Okay relax,” your hands pat his chest, “he just bought me an ice coffee. Left it on my desk, didn’t say a word to me, I threw it away in front of him though.”

“Did he seriously not get it?”

You sigh as you sit back up, reaching over for your laptop in order to pull up netflix for you guys to watch something, “I’m sure he got it loud and clear now.”

Jungkook had in fact not got it loud and clear. In his defense this was the only thing he could think of doing that didn’t involve going up to you out of class and risking getting jumped, sure Jungkook was dumb but not dumb enough to believe he could take on Taehyung and Yoongi.

He had tried reaching out to you via text message but when his usual blue bubbles had turned green and never stated they were delivered he realized he had officially been blocked. You had also gone ahead and blocked him off your instagram as well, the only way he knew what you were up to was thanks to Eunwoo, the only one of his friends who was sympathizing with him.

So for the time being iced coffee was his way in, his pockets were hurting seeing you continue to toss drink after drink away in the trash but when the third time came around and you didn’t stomp down the steps and Kobe your drink into the trash in front of him he felt like he was making some progress.

Until class is dismissed that is. You were prepared, having all of your things prepacked and ready so when your professor let you go you could bolt right after him.

You had the drink in your hand, the majority of which you had consumed because you were a fiend for caffeine, your bag was thrown over your body haphazardly as you took the steps two at a time to match Jungkook’s pace.

He was halfway out the door when you reached the bottom, chasing after him as he made a sharp turn and continued down the hallway. You probably looked like a psychopath as you hunted down a giant freshman but you didn’t care.

He was completely oblivious to you as he exited the building, thinking he could relax when the fresh air met him and thats exactly when you pounce. Your finger coming out to jab him in the arm and he lets out a small yelp, his heart kicking up when he sees you step in front of him and the look on your face is not the one he had been expecting.

You’re breathing heavy from having to practically run after him, the plastic cup being crinkled in your grasp and he stares at it, trying a smile out when he sees that you had drank it.

“Stop this.”

Jungkook looks up at you again, his eyes wide in the classic Jungkook way and you have to look away, instead focusing on the center of his nose to not let his eyes sway you, “I just–“

“I didn’t throw it away today because someone told the professor I was dumping liquid into the trash and I’m not trying to get in trouble because you don’t know how to fucking act.”

Just as he thought he had made progress it all falls apart in front of him and his expression pains you, the look of utter defeat on his face hurts you.

“Im sorry, I’ve tried reaching out but you blocked me on everything.” He says the words so quickly, scared you’re going to cut him off again before he can speak.

“Of course I did Jungkook, you hurt me. I don’t want you to reach out. Don’t be simping over a slut like me, right?” You drop the iced coffee on the floor between you two before walking off, the cup stays standing up and thankfully not splashing all over his shoes and pants.

Jungkook just stands there, his cheeks turning red when he notices the attention he’s getting from the students that were walking by. His hand comes up to awkwardly rub the back of his neck, bending over to pick up the cup and dispose of it before he’s speed walking with his head down, no destination in mind.

There really was no way out of this for him, he wished he could be more assertive, confident even when it came to talking to you. Maybe then he would be able to properly explain himself before you cut him off and threw words in his face that he swore weren’t true.

Jungkooks chest ached, the seed of a crush that had burrowed its roots was barely hanging on. He was trying to keep it in tact but you and his friends had taken to digging and stabbing the soil surrounding it and now he was the one hurting.

He walks deeper into campus, arriving into the makeshift lounging area, a bunch of benches and tables set around with trees and plants scattered in between. Jungkook deems this spot is fine enough and hunkers down into the ironwood bench, his body hunching over as he rests his elbows on his knees with his head hanging low.

His eyes are shut for a minute or so, the small chatter of students around him filling his ears, the crunching of leaves being heard approaching him, and then the sound stops in front of him. Jungkook furrows his eyebrows, cracking an eye open and seeing a pair of tan strapped boots a few feet away from his, and thats when he lifts his head up and meets the blank stare of Yoongi.

The older one is stood there, a beanie on his head and his bag strapped on, an unreadable look on his face that only makes Jungkook nervous. Had you told Yoongi that he had bought you coffee and now he was going to get jumped? On campus? Really?

“You know,” Yoongi starts, his sharp eyes looming over Jungkook, taking in his appearance and look of pure sadness, “I’m normally a really understanding guy but I can’t for the life of me make sense to how you fucked up so badly.”

Jungkook can only swallow, not entirely sure where this conversation was leading to. Yoongi didn’t seem pissed, but he was usually really good at holding a pokerface.

Yoongi had been walking around campus, killing time between classes when he stumbled upon Jungkook looking like a wounded animal on the bench. He knew Jungkook had hurt you and if you didn’t want to give him the time of day anymore then that was your call, Yoongi being as observant as he always was, knew there was more to whatever the fuck happened. He had grown a soft spot for the kid and the time they had spent around each other let him see that what happened between you two was so very out of character for Jungkook.

He wanted to figure it out, blame it on his boredom or his love for problem solving, but he also knew that Jungkook most likely couldn’t talk to anyone right now so he also wanted to do this for him.

“Are you here to kick my ass?” Jungkook mumbles out softly, his mind already accepting defeat.

Yoongi frowns, “What? Kick your ass?”

When Jungkook nods, suddenly flinching when Yoongi starts to laugh, “You really think I could kick your ass? Thanks man.” Jungkook cracks a smile, letting himself relax now that he knows he knows Yoongi isn’t a physical threat. “Where are your friends?”

Yoongi ruffles his messy hair and readjusts his beanie as he waits for an answer, Jungkook sighs, rubbing his palms down his pants, “I don’t know, haven’t really talked to them much lately.”

After that evening Jungkook had distanced himself, it was the first time he ever raised his voice and Mingyu never expected it. He had only stayed in constant contact with Eunwoo but because his friends had formed their friendship before Jungkook joined the bunch he just felt it was best if he was the one to step back. He wasn’t sure if it was temporary or not but he wouldn’t be going back to acting like buddies unless something was discussed.

Yoongi hums, his hands gesturing to the spot beside him and Jungkook nods, reaching over and grabbing his bag to plop onto the floor by his feet. Yoongi chuckles to himself at the motion as he sits, how Jungkook was always so quick to accommodate for friends, and that’s exactly how he knows what he had done was very much not Jungkook.

“So are you gonna tell me what happened between you and Y/N?”

Jungkook gulps at the question, his heart not ready to rehash this again with Yoongi of all people, would he run to you and gossip over whatever he said?

“I mean you saw it all happen.” Jungkook mumbles out, referring to that evening when his group ran into you and Yoongi.

The older boy sighs, resting his elbows on his knees to lean forward slightly, his eyes focused on the hedges a few feet away because he knew Jungkook would squirm if he stared at him. “No, what I saw was your friend be a douchebag and Y/N telling you off. It feels like I’m missing a pretty big chunk of the picture.”

He can feel Jungkook fidget in his seat, his thighs rubbing against Yoongis as he tries to readjust himself. Jungkook feels like hes sat in front of the principles office after getting in trouble at school except Yoongi is far more terrifying than any school principle, even as hes sat there patiently waiting for Jungkook to say his half.

He just groans softly, his palms coming up to cup his eyes in shame, dropping back onto his lap as he leans fully against the bench, “I was an idiot, thats what happened.” Yoongi hums in agreement and Jungkook isn’t even offended at that, his mind being made in telling Yoongi everything he hadn’t been able to tell his friends. His friends hadn’t known that you were helping him with the girl problems he swore he had, his friends just thought Jungkook was swooned by you, his mind fixating on the relationship you had with his room mate and forming that into a mindless crush.

But he tells Yoongi all of it, tells him about the cafe meetings and text messages, leaving out details of any sexual activities you did but he admits to hoping his date with Jisoo didn’t work out because you were the one thing constantly on the back of him mind. How he had let his dumb friends influence his thinking when all he had wanted to do was come clean to you.

“I like her, so much Yoongi and I fucked it all up and the worst part is she thinks I saw her as this object I wanted to obtain but fuck–“ his eyes look up at the sky, frowning at the grey overcast, “theres no saving it is there?”

Yoongi licks his lips over as he stares at him, the distraught look on his face shows how sincere hes being and Yoongi doesn’t doubt him. He had been telling you about Jungkook’s feelings before this had all crashed and burned and its because he saw the way Jungkook acted around you compared to the moments he’d see him in passing.

“If I’m being honest, I think there was still a chance until you sealed the nail in your coffin when your friend called her a slut and you said nothing to defend her.” He shrugs at the expression on Jungkooks face, “Y/N’s stubborn, and I know she acts hard but if you really want to try to make this better no one can help you but you. I’m not going to give you tips or pointers because she’s my friend and if she wants you to keep your distance I’m going to respect that.”

Jungkook sighs with a nod, “I’ve brought her coffee these last few classes and she kept throwing them away and today she yelled at me for it.”

Yoongi laughs and Jungkook finally looks offended, a pout forming on his lips, “Dude really? You’re trying to buy her attention with coffee?”

“No thats not what I’m doing.”

“Hm, kinda is man. Have you tried not bolting out of class and going to talk to her like a human being.”

When Jungkook looks embarrassed at the realization that you had told your friends of his olympic worthy bolts Yoongi just laughs harder, his hand coming out to shove his shoulder playfully. He’s pulling out his phone, seeing the time and getting up, “I gotta get going to class but its just a suggestion, or you can talk to her out of class. These aren’t tips though, I swear.” He raised his hands in front of him before giving Jungkook a wave and walking away.

Jungkook waves back and sags into the bench when he’s gone, his hand coming up to ruffle his hair and he finds himself grinning for the first time in a while. If Yoongi told him to try then maybe he still had a chance.

It’s not until a few days later, on the last Saturday of the month, that you realize you might need to speak to Jungkook. You’re sat at your desk at work, organizing files in their respective folders, you’re grumpy and anxious since today is the day where you would have to be Jimin’s plus one at his parent’s event. You love Jimin, really you do, but you’ve been to a handful of these events with him over the course of being his friend and his parents were not shy to lay on the back handed compliments and sly digs to get under yours and his skin.

The thought of having to be in a stuffy dress, surrounded by people all of which were insanely more financially stable than you could ever dream to be, trying to make small talk and going along with whatever lie Jimin decides to throw into the mix was making you irritable and your hands clammy.

“Okay, what’s your deal.” Yoongi challenged, his hands slamming down onto his own desk with a loud slap. He was officially fed up with you, having to hear the small remarks you let slip under your breath at literally anything he did or said today was pissing him off because he had done absolutely nothing to you.

His harsh tone snaps you out of your small grumpy haze, a pout forms on your lips as you sink into your chair and slowly spin to face him. The way you look in your chair cracks him, a smirk spreading across his face when he sees the dramatic change in emotion, “Are you on your period or something?” He teases.

That makes you sit up straight again, the scowl returning on your face as you stare him down, “I’m going to ignore how demeaning that question is, but for your information no, I’m not due until the 22nd you asshole.” You let your head hang back over the chairs headrest, the thoughts of the awaiting night flashing through your head, “I’m just dreading having to go help Jimin fulfill his wish of making his parents stare at us in horror.”

Yoongi hums at that, a curious look on his face as he just waits until you lift your head back up to give him another glance, “What?”

He only gives you a shrug, his eyebrows raising up softly as he sneaks a glance at the calendar icon on his computer screen that says its currently the 28th, “The 22nd huh?” That doesn’t give him a reaction at all, your mind was whirling too much from everything consuming your life so it doesn’t register, “Y/N, are you with child?”

That gives him the reaction he was hoping, your eyes bulging out as you whip back around to grab your phone from its place beside the computer. “Shut up,” you choke out, your now shaky hands unlocking the device and going directly for the period tracking app you had, the loading screen taking its sweet time until it finally opens up. The small dot on the circle calendar that shows your typical ovulation cycle and period cycle is now hovering a little past the date you were supposed to be starting said period.

“Oh god, can you imagine the offspring you and Taehyung would create, demon child I tell you.”

You only give him a weak laugh as you lock your phone again, late periods were fine, it’s not like they never happened to you before. Plus you were on birth control, always on top of making sure you took it at the same exact time everyday, even taking the placebo pills to not fall out of routine. But that sinking feeling still lingers in your gut, the realization that you and Taehyung actually hadn’t slept together since the night he asked you out on a date, how he had used a condom and finished on your face. Then comes the small flashes of the two mistakes you made on halloween night, fucking Jungkook without a condom and begging him to cum inside you.

“Yeah.” Is all you can muster out at his comment, he takes note of the forced smile on your face and can tell you’re starting to panic a little and he’s not sure why since the amount of times you’ve let Taehyung bust inside you has lead to one other pregnancy scare before. But when your now glassy eyes come back up to look at him, his own face falls, the unspoken question hanging in the air.

Was it Taehyung’s?

That same question haunts you the entire night, as you get to Jimin’s apartment and finish getting ready with him, the both of you decked out in expensive outfits that are down right insulting, not even him joking with you as you got into the car was enough to get you out of your head.

Jimin takes note of this, more so when you both arrive at the event, the way you cling onto his arm like you do during these things is normal but the way your eyes focus on the floor or chandeliers with a spaced out look on your face is not the norm.

The way you float along side him as he talks to the majority of the people here, this being one of the rules his parents give him that he respects, you barely speak up. Its a stark contrast from the way you two usually behave at these events, he’s used to the way you add on the small white lies he tells, how meeting new people was exciting because you could come up with a brand new scandalous story on how you two met. Jimin refrains from that today, the spacey look on your face only making him worry.

It’s not until two of the shareholders he’s currently speaking to, out of formality, start to give you weird glances, possibly wondering if you were under the influence of something from how out of it you looked, that Jimin respectfully excuses the two of you.

His arm wraps around your waist as he leads you towards the hallway, out of earshot from the nosey guests here and the way you let him drag you away without any complaints only worries him further. When the soft music no longer reaches your ears you seem to come back, your eyes blinking as you focus back in on where you are, seeing Jimin stood in front of you with his hands on your shoulders as he presses you against the wall gently.

“Are you on anything?” He asks softly, his head peaking down to stare up at you, your eyes aren’t hazy anymore but its clear your mind still isn’t fully tuned in, “Y/N, you gotta let me know if you took something ‘cause you’re kind of scaring me sweetheart.”

His hands come up to cup your cheeks, turning your face up to properly look at him and something about the way he stares at you, worry clear on his face and his lips pursed in concern, snaps something inside of you. Your eyes well up with tears, your lower lip trembling slightly as your face crumbles, hot tears spilling past your lashes and splashing against his hands still on your face.

“Jimin, I’m so fucked.” You garble out, the confession only making you cry harder which in turn makes Jimin even more worried. A few people attending the outrageous event pass you two in the hallway, giving you an odd glance but Jimin just glares at them, moving his body to cover you properly as you have a breakdown.

“What’s wrong?” His mind is desperately trying to remember if he saw you take anything, maybe you had drank something spiked, it could be a combination of things. “Did you drink too much champagne?” He tries to make light of the situation but his words only make you grip the lapels of his suit and tug him closer to you, burying your face into the black material.

Another sob leaves you, his hands wrapping around your body and holding you close, “Jimin.” You whine out, your voice sounding so broken and helpless and he knows something more serious is wrong. He glances behind him, into the full room, everyone mingling around with glasses in their hand and he spots his mom, grasping another flute of champagne as she stares directly at him and you.

She has the ever present disapproving stare on her face, watching her son holding you as you cry in a hallway. A few of the guests had jokingly mentioned your behavior to her in passing and the last thing she needed to hear was that her son and you were currently on drugs.

Jimin watches as she shakes her head and makes her way to another group of people, his jaw tensing at her judgmental gaze, “C’mon, lets get out of here.” He speaks to you softly, his fingers patting your head to get you to calm down, your breath hiccuping until you even it out slowly.

“O-okay, I’m sorry.”

He shushes you with a smile, grabbing your hand and leading you towards the back entrance of the building, “No, don’t be, I’ve been wanting to blow this joint for an hour now.”

Jimin knows he’s going to get the lecture of a lifetime for leaving but a couple of threats about his money being taken away seemed less important than his best friend having a mental breakdown. You let him drag you along the hallway, your other hand wiping underneath your eyes to try to fix your appearance any way you could.

By the time you two make it outside Jimin had already messaged the driver his parents had provided him with for the night, the black car already being parked out back. When you slip inside Jimin just asks him to take you both home, his fingers pushing the button to bring the partition up and you sink into the seat, avoiding his gaze.

The carpeted floors seems infinitely more interesting than you admitting to why you were absolutely losing your mind, you didn’t want say it out loud, scared that letting the words fill the air would somehow make them truthful. If you actually were with child like Yoongi had so kindly put it you wouldn’t know what to do, this had happened once before with Taehyung but you had gotten your period before you were even able to take a test so it had become kind of a joke.

But this, yeah this wasn’t funny, the possibility of being pregnant after sleeping with Jungkook when you two weren’t even talking any more was a nightmare and nothing could make this a laughing matter.

“You fucking scared me.” Jimin admits, resting his elbows on his knees as he leans forward in his seat, the layout of the car letting him directly face you. “Thought you took too many downers, you looked so out of it.”

You finally look up at him, your eyes red and burning from your tears and the mascara that bled into them, your cheeks are puffy and streaked up, a frown on your face when you see how sincere he looks. You hadn’t meant to scare him, you didn’t even realize how you were acting and the way anyone would perceive it. “I’m sorry.”

He waves off your apology, he didn’t need it, he was just relieved you had stopped crying, “Tell me what’s wrong.” Jimin watches as you chew on your bottom lip, your hands fidgeting on your lap as you give him a lame shrug. He stays silent, not wanting to speak until you fess up.

“I think,” You start, taking in a deep breath while your thumb scraped the nail polish off your index finger, “I might be pregnant.”

Jimin, much like Yoongi, knows how to keep his reactions in check, his face doesn’t move a muscle while he stares at you thoughtfully. His mind however is currently freaking out, trying to flick through any possible response he could give you that won’t end up making you cry again.

“Have you taken a test?”

Shake.

“Okay, have you told Taehyung?”

The silence that fills the car at his second question lasts for what seems like forever, the way your face twists up at his name, your eyes once again filling up with tears as you stare at your best friend. That same unspoken question hanging in the air.

Was it Taehyung’s?

Jimin doesn’t need you to answer it, the look on your face is confirmation enough, your words inside the event and the way you clung to him as you cried was more than enough. He brings the partition down a crack and tells the driver to stop at a convenience store nearby instead, telling him to drop you guys off there and that you’d walk home since his apartment wasn’t far from there.

The pair of you must look like a sight, Jimin dressed in his black Armani suit while you stood in a black Alexander McQueen dress he had forced you to wear, it would look picture worthy if your under eyes weren’t caked in mascara and you weren’t standing in the aisle that held pregnancy tests. Jimin hovers beside you for a moment as you stare at all the different options, stepping aside for a minute only to come back with a small green basket that was full of different things.

You’re clutching onto a pink box that promised to let you know 6 days sooner, your eyes glancing down at the basket he held, “What’s all that?”

He lifts it up higher with a smile, “Well, tissues and your favorite comfort snacks in case you...you know,” he gestures with his hand, also not wanting to speak the cursed words out loud, “and alcohol to celebrate if you’re not.”

As you stare at the items you feel the urge to vomit out of nerves, the possibility of not being able to celebrate is very probable. Your hand clutches the box with more force, bending the cardboard material slightly. Jimin reaches out and peels it out of your grasp, taking it upon himself to reach past you and grab two more tests from different brands and stuffing them in the basket as well.

“I think you should call him.”

Thats all he tells you, a sympathetic smile on his face as he walks around you to go pay for everything, leaving you in the middle of the aisle. The lump in your throat is back again, your hands twitching by your side at the thought of having to talk to him. As much as you don’t want to see him, or talk to him, you know Jimins right. In the off chance that you were...you know... it would make sense to have him there, he was partially responsible so it wasn’t fair that you’d be the only one suffering through this.

With much hesitation you reach into your small crossbody purse and pull out your phone, the screen lighting up instantly and showing you the recent messages Taehyung had sent you, asking you when you’d be home from the event along with an invitation to watch movies at his dorm since Jungkook wouldn’t be there.

When you read his name your brows furrow, why wouldn’t he be there? If he was out with friends would he even want to talk to you, would he even care, the Jungkook you knew before would but you weren’t even sure if that was still the case. You opt for sending him a text, simple and to the point, it would give him the option of reading it and responding instead of having a forced conversation on the phone.

You unblock his number and open up your thread of messages, not being able to delete the entire thing after blocking him. After sending the message you lock your phone and stuff it back into your bag.

Y/N 11:28pm We need to talk, it’s important.

On the receiving end of things Jungkook is stood in the backyard of a party Eunwoo had forced him to go to, his room mate Moonbin was currently trying to force him to chug whatever concoction was in his cup.

“No, I’m good–“ Jungkook mumbles against the plastic, Moonbin not caring as he tips the cup up, the cold liquid hitting his lips as he squeezes them shut, spilling out and down his face, successfully soaking his shirt in the strong liquor.

Moonbin just laughs, pulling the cup away, his eyes looking at the large wet patch on Jungkook’s chest, “Oh shit, I’m sorry.”

Eunwoo rolls his eyes, playfully shoving his friends shoulder while Jungkook shakes his head, “It’s alright, I’ma just,” he motions his hand towards the house again, the both of them nodding in understanding.

Jungkook slips his way in between people, a small grimace on his face as he feels the way his shirt now sticks to his skin as he makes his way towards the bathroom. He didn’t know why he agreed to come to this party, he didn’t hate parties, but he was used to going to them with your group. They seemed less intimidating when he was surrounded by seven extra people, and as much as he liked Eunwoo and Moonbin, he didn’t feel entirely comfortable in this environment with them.

When he manages to get into the bathroom, luckily not occupied by lovers, he grabs a fist full of toilet paper, peeling his shirt off of his chest and wiping the excess moisture from his skin. His white shirt is officially ruined, stained a faint red color and reeking of–his lifts it up to his nose and sniffs–vodka he thinks?

After tossing the soiled napkins he rests against the sink, fishing his phone out of his pocket to glance at the time and when he sees your name flashing on his home screen he momentarily wonders if he had in fact drank the poison Moonbin has spilled on him.

You messaged him. You had unblocked his number. You wanted to talk, and apparently it was important.

He slides the message open, his fingers hovering over the screen as he thinks of how to properly respond. A loud bang comes from the door and he flinches, “Hold on!” He shouts out, typing out a one words response of where before hitting send and exiting the bathroom.

Jungkook ignores the man stood by the bathroom door, shoving past him and through the bodies of everyone in the living room as he heads for the front door. He doesn’t bother letting his friends know that he’s leaving, already out of the house and walking down the street of a neighborhood he wasn’t familiar with.

His phone is clutched in his hand as he walks, the two short vibrations making him pause as he brings it up to his face, seeing you tell him to meet you at Jimin’s as soon as he could.

You’re sat on Jimin’s couch, your phone resting on his coffee table, the screen lit up after you read the message Jungkook had sent ten minutes ago, confirmation that he was on his way. Jimin was stood in his kitchen, trying to occupy himself while the both of you waited, he had been opening and closing his cabinets and rearranging whatever was inside them for a few minutes now, the constant slamming of the wood would normally get to you but right now your eyes were just glued on the three tests resting beside your phone. They were still in their boxes, you could have taken them before Jungkook got here but you didn’t have it in you.

So when you hear three brisk knocks coming from Jimin’s front door you shoot up from your spot, ramming your shin on the coffee table in your haste to get to the door. You bend over with a groan, clutching your leg in pain while Jimin beats you to it, opening the door with a gentle greeting.

His face scrunches up when he catches a whiff of Jungkook, his hand waving in front of his face as his eyes catch onto the wet spot on his shirt, “Fun night?”

Jungkook looks down at his shirt as well, “No, not really.”

He steps inside and spots you stood by the couch, not exactly sure how you should greet each other. He takes notice of your outfit, the black dress looking elegant on you even without your heels on, and he briefly remembers you mentioning the event Jimin needed you to come with him to, “You look nice in that dress.” He can’t stop himself from complimenting you, even though it makes you squirm as you stand there.

You ignore the compliment entirely, rolling your lips together as you take a look down at the coffee table, reaching for one of the boxes and holding it close to your chest. Jungkook follows the motion, his head tilting slightly until his eyes decipher whats written on the box, “I might be pregnant.”

It takes him a minute, his mind wondering why you could have possibly text him to come talk about this, and then he’s also remembering the two dreadful mistakes that happened halloween night. The way he had no complaints about fucking you raw, the idea of cumming inside you spurring him on and he can’t believe he had let himself act that stupid.

Jungkook takes the few steps necessary to reach you, standing a foot in front of you with his eyes wide in that same classic Jungkook way, “Have you taken it yet?”

“No, I was waiting for you to get here.” He watches as your face grimaces, your fingers pinching your nose as the stench of vodka hits it, “You reek, are you drunk?”

He shakes his head immediately, his fingers pulling the damp fabric again and Jimin takes sympathy on him, pushing away from his spot lingering by the door to go to his room and fetch him a clean shirt to wear, coming out with a black shirt. He tosses it at Jungkook wordlessly before announcing that he’d be leaving to give the two of you some privacy.

You force yourself to look away while Jungkook yanks the liquor soaked shirt off of himself, not giving him a glance until he’s dressed again in your friend’s clothes. “Sorry, my friend spilt his drink on me before I left.”

That didn’t matter, you honestly didn’t care if he was drunk or not, this might be a little easier if the both of you were drunk. Your fingernails start to wedge underneath the seal of the box, peeling the cardboard flap open. Jungkook reaches forward and grabs the second test on the coffee table, his trembling hands mimicking your actions. His mind was currently blank, not yet coming to terms with the fact that you could be pregnant with his child. He couldn’t think about that right now, maybe in a bit he’d feel the dread that usually comes with this but for right now all he heard in his head was static.

“Are you gonna take all three?”

You toss the empty box onto the table, holding one of the small plastic sticks in your hand, rotating it in your grasp with uncertainty, “Maybe? Should I take two and save one for tomorrow just in case?”

Jungkook doesn’t know, he’s completely clueless on what to do but he finds himself nodding because sure, leaving one test up for chance for tomorrow morning seemed to ease some of the anxiety off your face. “Yeah, yeah that sounds good.”

“Okay.”

When he pulls out the remaining test he feels the first hint of fear creep up his spine, the plastic feels heavy in his grasp, these stupid flimsy things held the answer on whether both of your lives would change or not. His brows push together as he reads the blue font on the edge of the stick, his mind now thinking of the what ifs.

He wants to throw up.

The sound of you walking towards the bathroom makes him look up from the test, seeing you standing at the edge of the hallway with an expectant look on your face, “Do you want me to come with you?” He manages to ask even though his throat feels dry.

You hold the test tighter in your hands, “Can you, I’m sorry I’m just kind of scared.”

Jungkook stands up straight, forcing his nerves away because you were whats important right now, he nods at you as he makes his way towards you, “Yeah, of course.” You thank him silently, hearing him trailing behind you as you enter Jimin’s bathroom, catching sight of yourself in his mirror and cringing at how you looked.

You set the two tests on the countertop, your eyes analyzing them, picking out the first one with the pink cap on the top of it. Jungkook can only stand there, watching as you walk towards the toilet thats right beside the sink, the dress you wear is long enough to fully cover you as you reach underneath it and tug your underwear down but he still finds himself looking away. He chooses to haul himself onto the countertop, a few feet away from you with his eyes glued to the obscure photo Jimin had hung up on the wall.

He hears the shuffling of your dress as you pick the material up around you, trying your best to bunch it up as you uncap the test and awkwardly wedge it between your thighs when you finally sit down. The idea of peeing in front of Jungkook, on a pregnancy test nonetheless, feels too domestic, too out of place for your current situation but it needs to be done.

You thank Jimin for forcing you to chug as much water as you did before he got here, your urge to pee aiding in the task. After a few seconds you pull the test out from between your legs, handing the plastic part to Jungkook and he hands you the second test, already uncapped as he sets the first one down gently on the black granite.

No words are exchanged as you do this, you just needed him here with you so you wouldn’t feel so alone, whatever you were feeling you knew he was feeling too and as much as you knew Jimin would be there for you, he wouldn’t be able to relate to these emotions right now.

Once the second test is done with and you’re no longer sat on the toilet, patting your hands dry after washing them you stand there, nibbling on your lip as Jungkook sets a timer for five minutes on his phone, “I can’t stand here and wait.”

He agrees, stepping his way out of the bathroom and motioning for you to follow him back out to the living room, plopping down onto the end of the couch. You walk around the coffee table, sitting on the opposite end of the same couch, bringing your legs up to clutch your knees to your chest as you rest your head on the back of the couch.

Five minutes feels like forever, the two of you lost in thought as his phone counts down the minutes. You can see Jungkook’s face, the way his hands are raking through his hair nervously, his nose twitching ever so often as a million emotions cross his face. God you didn’t want to be pregnant, not like this. The thought makes tears mist your eyes again, it starts as a silent cry, one or two tears slipping down your face undetected but once the dam is broken you can’t contain the sniffles you let out.

That catches Jungkook’s attention, his head whipping over to look at you, balled in on yourself as you cried, your shoulders shaking with every gasped breath you took. Seeing you look so broken and scared makes him slide his way over, not letting his uncertainty stop him from wrapping his arms around your body and bringing you into his chest.

For a brief moment he thinks you’re going to shove him back, but your arms let go of your legs as you let Jungkook hold you close, hearing his own breathing stuttering as he tries to hold in the tears he desperately wants to shed. “What are we supposed to do?” You sob, feeling his hands gently rub your back as your own hands finally wrap around his frame, needing all the comfort you could take.

“I don’t know,” he admits softly, his jaw clenching when that only makes you cry harder, “whatever you wanna do.”

You don’t believe that, “Really?” You rasp out between gasps, “So if I am and want to keep it you’re fine with that?”

He nods, licking his lips in thought, “Yes, if that’s what you want.” His hands pull you in tighter, “Like I said, whatever you wanna do.” Jungkook wanted kids eventually, ideally when he was married and had a good job, but if this was the cards life gave him and you wanted to keep it then so be it. The thought of this happening was scary, the image of having to tell his parents, of having to rethink the five year plan he had, having to potentially become responsible for a tiny human was frightening but he wasn’t going to force you to do anything, especially when he could only imagine what thoughts were swimming in your head.

When your breathing evens out, your hands still holding him close, he can’t get himself to revel in it, to enjoy the feeling of you holding him like you don’t hate his guts because he knows its just because of this. After this was done you’d go back to hating him, regardless of the outcome so when his timer rings out he dreads having to let you go.

The two of you pull apart from each other, your hands weakly rubbing away the stray tears as you stare at him, seeing his face is just as red from the silent tears he managed to shed. You share a look, a deep breath being let out between the both of you, you couldn’t put this off any longer so you force yourself to get up and somberly make your way back to the bathroom.

The light was left on, both of the used tests being face down since you and Jungkook couldn’t bare to stare at the small countdown on the tiny screen, you and him stand at the doorway, the reflection on the mirror showing just how distraught and unprepared you are for whatever the results are.

“Should we each flip one over?” He suggests, his fingers twitching at his sides, just wanting to get it over with.

“Yeah. Let’s do that.”

He reaches for the pink capped test and you grab the blue one, your fingers lingering on the sides of it with uncertainty, “On three.” He begins, seeing you nod in the mirror as you stare down at the stick.

One.

Two.

Three.

The both of you flip the test over, mentally bracing yourself as your eyes make out the tiny words on the gray screen. A small gasp is shared between you two, eyes wide in disbelief you crane your neck over to read the words on the test Jungkook holds and he does the same, not wanting to react until you know they both say the same thing.

not pregnant

“Oh thank fuck.” He whispers out, the test falling out of his grasp and clattering against the floor. Jungkook crumbles against the sink, resting his weight on his elbows as his head hangs low. You let yourself finally take a breath, dropping your head back to stare at the ceiling with the test still clutched in your right hand. The turmoil in your brain halts for a second, no longer thinking of how your life is on a downward spiral just when it had finally seemed to fall together.

The bathroom is silent for a moment, the pair of you trying to compose yourselves from the roller coaster of emotions that transpired in the past 15 minutes. You weren’t pregnant, you weren’t going to become a mother and Jungkook wasn’t going to become a father. Thank fucking god.

“Would you really have let me keep it if I was?” You break the silence, leveling your head back down and staring at his hunched over frame, his own head peaking up to stare at you resting against the nearest wall of the bathroom.

“Yeah.” He admits quietly, sending you a small nod as he looks into your eyes with the utmost sincerity.

“Were you ready to be a dad?” You give him an incredulous look, once again not believing he’d be ready to uproot his entire life over one night together. Hell, you weren’t ready to be a mother, you were selfish and the only thing you were focused on was finishing school and not being in debt. Having a kid was not in your near future.

Jungkook stands up again, giving you a shrug and staring at the marble floors, “No, not at all,” The relief on his face is clear as he takes in a breath, “but considering I had no complaints about not wearing a condom I don’t think I’m in any place to tell you what to do with your body.”

That wasn’t an answer you had been expecting, and for a moment you’re reminded on the Jungkook you had developed a crush on, the one that was always so willing to sacrifice his own comfort to make his friends feel better. When you had been in this position with Taehyung, after knowing you were in the clear, you had text him asking him what he would have done if you were actually pregnant and all he had sent you was the cartoon meme of a lady tossing a child into the air like a basketball.

It had made you laugh because realistically, that would be the route you would take but hearing someone voice how it was indeed your choice was nice, comforting even. You’re grateful it didn’t have to come to that though, hypothetically you know what you would’ve done but if you actually were pregnant you’re not sure if that choice would change.

He stares at you again, seeing how your face looks at ease now, your eyes focused on your feet pressed against the cool marble floors. “I’m sorry.” He begins, scared of where this conversation would lead to but he needed to suck it up, he had to properly apologize to you. If you shouted at him and threw him out afterwards he could live with that, as long as he was finally able to speak to you.

“That I’m not pregnant?”

“No,” he shakes his head, resting his back on the wall adjacent to the sink, seeing the realization sink into your face at what he was apologizing for, “I’m sorry for handling my emotions the way I did. For focusing on myself and not thinking of how it would affect you.”

A tiny scowl makes it way across your face, your free hand curling into a fist at your side but he looks about ready to barf so you let him continue, “I was scared of how our relationship would change after that morning, which sounds stupid now considering thats exactly what ended up happening because of me.” He’s forcing himself to maintain eye contact, not wanting to look away from you, “It was never my intention to make you feel like I was using you.”

He sees the flash of anger in your eyes at his words right before you bite, “How the hell did you think I would feel after that Jungkook? We sleep together and you immediately drop me, what did I do for you to treat me like that, should I not have asked you to have breakfast after?”

“No, god no. You didn’t do anything.” He wants to bang his head against the drywall, wanting to release his inner frustrations out on himself, “It was all me, I could feel the crush I had on you growing and I knew you didn’t want a relationship so I didn’t want to confess and then put you in an uncomfortable position. My friend’s got in my head-”

“Do you not have a mind of your own?”

He stops mid sentence, his head tilting slightly at your words, “What?”

You stand up straighter against the wall, your arms crossing under your chest while you glare at him, “You’re telling me that instead of doing what you wanted to do, you rely on whatever the hell your friends told you. The same friends that called me a slut I’m assuming.”

His face scrunches up at that, an apologetic look on it as he sighs, “I’m sorry-”

The hand you raise up stops him from apologizing again, “I don’t want to hear that, whatever you say now won’t change the fact that you did nothing when I needed you to.” He could say sorry a million times for the way his friend acted, tell you he fought him or yelled at him for what he said, none of that mattered because he had stayed silent in front of you. “I just want to know what they could’ve said that convinced you that treating me like this had a better outcome than admitting to a crush.”

Jungkooks eyes drop back down to the floor, landing on the forgotten pregnancy test laying beside his feet, the tip of his shoes pushing the plastic on the floor. He wants to go back to that day, he knows what his friends said shouldn’t have influenced him because he knew you, but the way they hounded him made him doubt everything. He had already been so unsure of the way he was reading things and their reaction just made him feel like he had no idea how to behave in situations that they claimed were regular occurrences for them.

“They told me I was stupid for thinking of telling you how I feel, that there was no way you’d see this as more than one night because you have Taehyung, to just let it go because you didn’t view sex the same way I probably did.”

His words just make you frown, “Jungkook, was I ever a bad friend to you?”

He shakes his head, his courage gone, no longer being able to look at you.

“Did I ever make you feel uncomfortable?”

Once again he shakes his head.

“So then why did you think you couldn’t talk to me. You know me better than any of your friends do, why were their opinions of me more important than yours?”

“I don’t know, but they shouldn’t have been. I was just scared of admitting my feelings.”

A sigh leaves your lips, you weren’t in the mood to shout at him, or argue, you were emotionally drained for the night. “You wanna know why I liked you Jungkook?”

He finally looks up again, his eyes dimming slightly at the word liked, past tense, you had liked him. “You’ve always been sweet to me, you trusted me enough to come to me for help, you always let us drag you along to places I could tell you didn’t want to be at just because you knew it would make one of us smile. Every time we hung out together I knew it was genuine, you were hanging out with me because you wanted to, not because you were expecting to get something out of it, but then you did this and it has me wondering if everything leading up to it was a lie.”

The hurt is evident on your face and Jungkook just wants to make it right, he doesn’t like being on the receiving end of this, “No I promise it wasn’t, I loved spending time with you, it wasn’t all for some end goal. You were the first person to make me feel comfortable in school.” He recalls the first day he saw you in your shared class, the way you had let him know he didn’t have to be wary talking to you, the open ended promise of a friendship before you parted ways.

“I literally gave you a black eye with my camera when I met you.”

“Yeah, but I deserved it right?”

That gets you to crack a smile, the way he scrunches up his face as he remembers the way your camera had felt when it sucker punched him in the face. He hadn’t deserved it, no one deserved to get a bloody nose and black eyes on their first day of college, you had just said that to hurt him.

“Yeah, you did.” You tease him, seeing the way he relaxes slightly when you let out a small laugh.

“I’m really sorry Y/N, I don’t expect you to forgive me, or not hate me anymore but I just needed you to know why I acted like a dumbass.”

The air falls silent once more, the both of you look utterly defeated, drained and vulnerable while you stand in the giant bathroom. You bring up the test that was still in your grasp, your lips pressing together as you reread the text. “Jungkook, you were ready to become a fucking dad, I don’t think I could totally hate your guts.”

Jungkook can feel his chest ache again, his hands clenching at his sides, urging the feeling to go away, he couldn’t think about the stupid seed of a crush still hanging on to his heart. The both of you had been through enough tonight, you admitting to not being able to hate him was good enough for him.

“Really?”

You push off the wall and toss the test into the trash bin by the toilet, Jungkook bends down and picks up the one on the floor, handing it to you as well. “Yeah really, you’re on thin ice though.”

The soft smile you give him makes him sigh in relief, “I’ll be on my best behavior. Scouts honor.”

You snort as you turn and walk out of the bathroom, hearing him flick the light off and follow you back out to the living room, you pass the coffee table and turn into the kitchen, pulling out the bottle of red wine Jimin had bought, grabbing the giant bag of chocolate chip cookies and wine opener as well before walking back out towards the couch.

Jungkook eyes the items in your hand, flopping onto the couch as you sit beside him, holding the bottle of wine between the two of you. You hand him the wine opener and he makes do, twisting the end of it into the cork and popping it open quickly, setting the device onto the coffee table, “To not becoming parents.”

The bottle is raised high between you as you smile, bringing it to your lips and taking a giant gulp of the fruity liquid, wiping your mouth as you hand it to Jungkook. He repeats what you do, taking a massive gulp and setting the bottle down with care, scared of spilling the red liquid on Jimin’s light couch.

To not becoming parents.

Somewhere in between finishing the bottle of wine, you find yourself sprawled out on the couch, your legs curled up by your chest with your head resting on Jungkook’s thigh. In turn his body is sinking into the couch, his head resting on the back of it, one of his hands laying on the arm rest while the other gently plays with your hair. You’re lazily munching on a cookie, the warm feeling of being wine drunk settled into your bones, Jungkook’s touch only aiding in making you feel sleepier.

“I think I’d be a really shitty mom.” You mumble out between chewing, your hand reaching down between your legs to stuff your hand into the cookie bag once more.

“What, why?”

Jungkook feels you shrug against his legs, “I don’t know, I’ve never really been maternal, kinda selfish.”

His eyes are shut, his cheeks are flushed and he feels warm but content, “Don’t say that, do you want kids?”

“Maybe, thats why it scares me though.” The thought of having a kid and being a lousy parent is what stopped you from visualizing a future with a family, you didn’t want to be a shitty mom. Flashes of the way you were raised flick behind your lids when you shut them, the strained relationship you have with your parents, the reality that some people really should’ve never become parents. The last thing you’d ever want to do is bring a child into the world and instead of nurturing it with unconditional love all you manage to do is tear them down.

“I think you’d be a great dad though.”

Your words are quieter now, your eyes slipping shut as he hums in thought. You could picture Jungkook as a dad, married to someone just as sweet as he was, living near the beach or somewhere suburban. He’d be the kind of dad who took his kids to all their sporting events, teaching them a little bit of everything because Jungkook had that talent. To think that might have been kickstarted tonight if things had gone differently.

“You think so?” Its a soft question, almost as if he hadn’t meant to voice it at all but you mumble out a yes in response, smiling once more when you hear him sigh gently, almost picturing the grin thats surely on his face.

Silence falls over you two again, and for a moment you think maybe he had fallen asleep since you weren’t too far from it, but his fingers continue to comb through your hair, “Are you with Taehyung now?” He asks shyly, he had heard about you going on dates and hanging out with him alone more often but he didn’t want to assume anything again, thats exactly what got him in this predicament in the first place.

“No, I’m not.” The words fall from your mouth instantly, almost as if you’re eager to let Jungkook know he had a chance, no matter how small, you want to blame it on the wine, on anything really, but you can’t deny that Jungkook had you charmed the minute you met him, the feeling only growing as you got to know him more.

His fingers freeze in your hair for a split second before continuing like your words had no affect on him. He smiles though, his lips curving up softly, his eyes blinking open and tilting his head down to stare at your drifting form, nuzzled onto his thighs in a way that made him forget the events that had happened these last few weeks.

When he doesn’t speak you take it upon yourself to tease him the way you knew best, “So, you had a crush on me huh?” Your words are mostly slurred together from sleep slowly taking over but he hears you clearly.

Expecting him to be bashful, scoff and deny it, pretend like he was over it but instead he sighs, his body sliding down the couch half an inch, the hand in your hand coming down to drape across your shoulder softly, “Yeah, I have a crush on you.”

The words replay in your head, the soft warmth in your chest spreading throughout you and you really can’t fault the alcohol for it, for the way you feel fuzzy at the confession of him still having a crush on you but you reel it in, shutting your eyes once more and humming in response. The two of you slowly drifting off on your best friends couch after the events of tonight, exhausted and relieved all at once.

When Jimin finally makes it back in a little before 1am he holds his breath, shutting the door softly when he makes out the shape of your silhouettes sleeping on the couch. His eyes lock onto the empty wine bottle and he feels his body sag in relief, thankful that you had drank the alcohol in celebration and he wouldn’t be walking into another scene of tears because he wasn’t sure he’d be able to hold his own back this time.

Jungkook looks boneless on his couch, his head hanging off the side with his mouth dropped open slightly, his hand is still draped across your shoulder while you sleep soundly on his thighs, the dress you wore to the event still on you and the two of you look like complete messes but Jimin still smiles.

He reaches out and grasps the empty bottle, gently pulling the bag of cookies from where its wedged between your legs, deciding to save the lecture on crumbs for tomorrow morning. As he pulls back, giving you and Jungkook another once over he freezes when he sees Jungkook’s bleary eyes blinking at him in confusion.

“Congrats.” Jimin teases softly, ruffling Jungkook’s hair with his free hand, seeing the soft smile that spreads across his face, his body sagging into the couch once more.

“Thanks.” He murmurs, adjusting the arm draped around you to go back to raking through your hair. Jimin and his eyes lock once more, a silent conversation between them and Jungkook understands and hopes that the second morning after plays out better than the last.

#btsghostie #jungkook angst #jungkook smut #taehyung smut #jeon jungkook #jungkook fluff #bts smut #bts fics

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clumsyclifford · 4 years

Note

1 WITH LASHTON PLEASE BELLA I LOVE YOU SO MUCH BUT I'LL LOVE YOU EVEN MORE -Alex

alex i love YOU like an infinite amount this is literally the least i can do in exchange for that ART like im reeling still

imagine if i DIDN’T write lashton angst. like just imagine that for a second. who would i be.

ALSO: upon receiving these prompts i realized i could kill two birds with one stone here because there are a fair few songs i’ve been meaning to make fics out of so i used those to write these SO. this one is talk me down by troye sivan

(if u wanna read this as a continuation of my emo lashton fic, u can.....it’s written that way....but it can also def stand alone)

By the burning red glow of Luke’s digital clock, it’s three in the morning when Ashton wakes him up.

“Ash,” Luke mumbles. He gets a bit of whiplash sitting up so quickly; Ashton awake at three in the morning almost never means anything good, and Ashton waking him at three in the morning is probably worse. “Hey. Hey. What’s up?”

Ashton shifts on his feet like he’s not sure if he can get in, so Luke sits up and moves over, patting the space beside him.

“Sorry,” Ashton says, which is always his first word when he wakes Luke, no matter how many times Luke has told him not to be sorry. That this is what he’s here for, what they’re here for, and that Ashton can wake him at any time, whenever, for as long as he needs. It’s impossible to phrase, exactly, the way that Luke is so sure he needs — and wants — to be there for Ashton.

“Don’t be sorry,” Luke says gently. “What’s up? What’s wrong?”

“No, nothing,” Ashton says hollowly, sinking into the mattress and tucking his legs up under him. “I don’t really know. I don’t know.”

“Okay,” Luke says. He reaches tentatively for Ashton and Ashton doesn’t jerk away, so he settles a hand in Ashton’s hair, smoothing it down and running his fingers between the strands. “That’s okay.”

“I felt like I needed to come home,” Ashton whispers, “but this is my house. I live here. It doesn’t get more home than this.”

Luke moves closer, wraps an arm around Ashton’s shoulders. “I know the feeling.”

“You feel like home, though,” Ashton murmurs, deliberately training his eyes on the duvet. “In here, with you. Anywhere with you.”

Luke feels his heart drum up a rhythm, and tries his best to ignore it. “I know that feeling, too.”

“I’m sorry,” Ashton says again, slightly desperate, though for what, Luke can’t imagine. “I know I can’t — I shouldn’t — say things like that, but I just —”

“Ashton, it’s okay. Really.”

“You make me feel safe,” Ashton says quietly, finally turning to look at Luke. Darkness shrouds his face, and Luke can barely make out the outline of his features, cheekbones sunk, jawline strong, eyes as piercing as ever. “Always, no matter what.”

“Ashton,” Luke breathes, gazing at him, unable to find the words for what he wants to say; it’s too big for words, too fragile to speak into existence.

He leans in, and then jerks, because this is something delicate and balanced; barely manages, “Can I —” before Ashton meets him halfway, kissing him like it’s the only thing in the world he’s sure of.

It’s easy to kiss Ashton. It’s the easiest thing in the world, because Ashton really is home for Luke, more than any other person, place, or thing, more than Sydney or LA, more than Michael or Calum, more than his own house, his own dog. The space Ashton fills in his heart is too big to call anything but home, and by the way Ashton sighs into his open mouth, it’s a more or less mutual feeling.

That’s what they do, here. Mutual feelings. They break in canon and heal in canon, and every once in a while they overlap on good days or bad days, but they always fix themselves up and start over. Half the time, Luke only dusts himself off from the knowledge that he’s going to need to be at his best when Ashton undoubtedly crashes in a few days. In every sense, Ashton is what hauls Luke to his feet when he’s at his worst, what sets him straight once again on the path towards doing better, being better.

In the dark, right now, lips moving in tandem with Ashton’s, Luke has never felt more aligned.

Ashton pulls back by a millimetre, leans his forehead against Luke’s, exhales. “I don’t deserve you,” is what he murmurs, all air and no substance, the words floating from his mouth to Luke’s.

Luke fists the back of Ashton’s shirt collar in his hand. “Stop it. It’s not a question of who deserves whom. If you want me, I’m yours. I’ve always been.”

“You can’t say that,” Ashton says helplessly. “I’m not — you can’t trust me with that. I’ll hurt you.”

“Ashton,” Luke whispers. “Would you ever hurt me?”

“No, of course not, not on purpose. But I might, by accident. I’m volatile. Come on, Luke, you’ve been living here long enough to know that.”

“Then I’ve been living here long enough for you to know I’m not much better,” Luke says, trying to balance gentleness with a hard undertone. “I’ve trusted you for seven years and you haven’t let me down yet. And I trust that if you make a mistake, you’ll set it right. Just like I will.”

“You sound awfully sure of yourself,” Ashton says, with a shaky laugh.

“I’m not,” Luke tells him. “It’s all a front. I’m secretly terrified, all the time, about everything.” Ashton smiles hesitantly, one of his hands finding Luke’s in the dark and tangling them together. “But I’m sure about you,” Luke adds. “About this, with you, whatever you want to call it.”

“Nothing,” Ashton says, sounding apologetic. “Nothing, yet. I don’t —”

“Okay. Nothing yet.”

“This is what I mean, you can’t —”

“Ashton,” Luke says calmly. “I can decide for myself. You matter to me. However I can be here for you, I will be. No more, no less.”

Ashton breathes out, long and slow. “When did you get so fucking sincere?”

Luke squeezes his hand. “Maybe around the time I met you. I just know how I feel, and this is the way I feel.” Ashton looks on the verge of saying something, but then he closes his mouth and sighs. “Whatever you want to ask for, just ask. I can always say no.” Though I wouldn’t, he thinks, because he can’t come up with a single thing he would refuse Ashton.

“Can I sleep with you?” Ashton whispers. Then, hastily: “Just sleep, not, like…just sleep.”

“Of course,” Luke says. That’s already a given; beds are for sharing, always. “You don’t have to ask about that.”

“For the rest of…permanently,” Ashton clarifies, nervously. “Can I just stay here, with you?”

Luke scratches lightly at Ashton’s scalp with the hand around his neck. “Of course you can.”

“Can I kiss you again?”

“Always,” Luke says, and the word is captured by Ashton’s mouth on his, sweet and wet and warm and Ashton, so unlike anyone Luke’s ever kissed before.

They fall asleep like that but lying down, faces so close their breath intermingles on the pillow, Luke holding Ashton tightly, like if he’s not careful Ashton will be gone by morning.

(He won’t, though. He isn’t. This thing may be fragile but it’s a lot tougher than it seems, and so is Ashton.)

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neoneversleeps · 5 years

Text

the sun, the moon and the stars | m.tl

pairing: moon taeil x reader (hanahaki!au)

genre: angst

warnings: major character death, mentions of blood, mentions of underage drinking

description:

She was the sun and he was the moon, and you were the stars that burned with the desire of attaining something unattainable.

words: ~6k

notes: hey guys! this fic has been a long time coming and im so happy to have finally finished it. this is also the first time im writing angst so bare with me if its not that good. hope you enjoy it nonetheless !!

- lilac

Moon Taeil. The name was fitting, really. Every time you thought of him, you thought of the moon. You thought of the nights all those years ago where Taeil drove the both of you to the hill outside the city in his hand-me-down car in the dead of the night because you just needed to get away. How the both of you sat on the grass looking up at the moon, his hand gently resting on yours and the soft night breeze drying your tear stained cheeks. he was your shoulder to cry on in those times. A comforting presence. Much like the moon in the night sky, Taeil had become a constant in your life from the very beginning.

You remembered the time when you were young and stupid and drank way too much at some house party. How the both of you stumbled through his garden at 3am, you desperately stifling your laughter as you tried to maneuver Taeil without him falling flat on his face. He was even more of a lightweight than you. You ended up tripping over your own two feet and sending both of you crashing onto the ground. Laughter flitted from you both as you stared at the moon in the sky. Suddenly Taeil leaned up and hovered over you. You didn't even have time to think as his lips planted a kiss on yours, and you kissed back. His kiss was warm and soft, hot breath fanning against your lips in stark contrast to the cool air around you. You couldn't quite remember how you ended up falling asleep in his room that night, but you definitely remembered the morning after.

Waking up the next morning on the mattress next to Taeil's bed, you had looked at the sleeping boy with newfound hope. Hope that your pathetic little (or not so little) crush on Taeil would be reciprocated. However, when he finally woke up he had no recollection whatsoever of the night prior. Your first kiss, forgotten so easily by the boy who had held your heart in his hands for as long as you could remember. Life went on normally after that, as if nothing had changed. But something had changed, and you were terrified because of it.

You were scared, so, so scared but you pushed every thought of the dreadful disease that plagued your world to the back of your mind. You weren't in love with Taeil, right? It was just a crush. It would fade. Its wasnt love. It wasn't. It couldn't be. He was your best friend and your love for him was purely platonic. These were the word you repeated to yourself over and over in your mind, hoping that if you said them enough they would become true.

You knew, however, that you were lying to yourself. Still, repeating the mantra in your head seemed to keep the disease at bay for quite some time. There even came a time where you thought you had successfully avoided it all together.

You were wrong.

It was the day Taeil's college acceptance letter was said to arrive. You had already gotten yours and had a confirmed spot at the University you were both aiming for. You were just as nervous as Taeil about his results and were headed over to his house for moral support (and to calm your racing heart). But as you turned the corner onto the street where Taeil lived, said boy was already running towards you, a piece of paper held high in his hand, chanting “I got in! I got in! I got in!”. He reached you and immediately picked you up in his arms, swinging you around a couple times. You were taken aback at first but soon laughed with the overly happy boy. He set you down again and as you looked into his eyes, the ones that shimmered like the moon in the night sky, you just knew.

He hugged you impossibly tight and whispered in to your neck: "I'm so happy we'll get to stay together. I don't know what I would do without my best friend." And you smiled, because you knew that his words were sincere and warm but there were tears pooling in your eyes at your sealed fate. He pulled away and the smile on his face morphed into a concerned frown at your teary look. "Are you ok?" His worried eyes bored into yours. "Yes," you responded, "I'm just so proud of you." The smile he gave you after that was worth the ache you felt in your heart.

That night, the seed was planted in your lungs, and a few months later you coughed up blood for the first time. You were a goner now.

It had been almost five years since that day and somehow, you were still alive. It seemed that the universe wanted to draw out your suffering for as long as it could. Both you and Taeil were now finished with college and well into your work-life. You had decided to become a graphic designer, as it was your passion since you were young. It only provided you with some odd jobs and didn't exactly guarantee a loaded paycheck, but it made you happy and you figured, with what limited time you had left, you might as well enjoy it. You worked mainly out of the comfort of your small apartment. It wasn't much, filled with tiny fake succulents and vintage knick knacks you had collected over the years, but when the golden hour settled throughout the city, the warm light bathed the apartment in an orange glow. And at night, you could perfectly see the moon shining down at you from where you sat at your desk, distracting you from your work countless time as your mind drifted to the man who shared it’s name.

Moon Taeil. The boy you had met as just a child had now grown into a man. He had become a true virtuoso on the piano (musical instrument he had mastered in his teen years). He was sought after by many theaters and often played shows that were sold out in the blink of an eye. In addition to his musical work, he had also taken on a day job as a music professor at the Uni you both studied at. He was as happy as could be, and you were happy for him. All these years your love for him had never faltered and even though it meant bloody petals would force their way out of your throat every once in a while, you didn't regret loving Taeil. You never did. It was just so easy to love him and to you, it felt natural. No matter how much it hurt.

However this did mean it hurt unbearably to see him happy with someone else. Tanaka Michiko, a Japanese transfer who had moved to Korea 2 summers ago. Taeil fell head over heels for her, and you couldn't blame him. She was gorgeous. Her sooty black hair fell in waves just above her shoulders, soft freckles dotted around her nose, a permanent dazzling smile on her face and honey skin which was warm to the touch.

His face brightened every time he would talk about her to you, about how much he wanted her to be his. Hours he had spent telling you about every detail that defined her as his head rested on your lap, your fingers combing through his tresses. From the way she talked, a cute accent highlighting every word that left her mouth, to the way her nose crinkled when she laughed. With every miniscule particularity you had learned about the girl, you were sure you could draw her from scratch in your mind.

So, finally, one night you had smiled at him and with a heavy heart and petals scratching at the insides of your lungs, and told him to go after her.

He chased after her for some time, but it wasn't long before she too fell for his charms. How could she not? Taeil was the perfect man. Handsome, thoughtful, kind, talented. It was impossible not to fall for the guy. A few months passed before they were official, and Taeil had proudly introduced her to you. You felt that you should hate her. Hate her for taking Taeil away from you, taking up his time, for having that which you have always hoped for. But you found that you just couldn't. Because she was sweet and understanding and kind and most importantly, she was good to Taeil.

You could see how much love she held for him in the way her eyes lingered on his face every time he smiled. You'd know that look anywhere. It's the same one with which you looked at him. When the two of them were together, it was like she was the sun and he was the moon, an absolutely perfect pair. Both of them completely opposites but a faultless match nonetheless. When you sat facing them in yours and Taeil's favorite diner, you felt as though you were the stars looking onto their love, but never getting to touch or feel the love you so desired for yourself. Always watching from a distance. Always longing for the warmth they held. But much like stars in the freezing expanse of your universe, you were left out in the cold.

Two years had passed since they first got together. Their anniversary was coming up and Taeil had begged you to help him come shopping for something special, claiming he needed your help choosing "the right one”. You had asked him what he meant on the phone but he was evasive.

Now you were being pulled through the crowded streets of Seoul by a very excited Taeil. "I've already narrowed it down to this one shop, but I just can't decide which one she would like better and I *need* your opinion." He explained through quick breaths as he moved through the huge number of people that surrounded you, all heading their separate ways. You were still very confused as to what he meant. "What do you mean, Taeil? Which wha-" you were cut off by Taeil's shout: "Here it is!". You looked up at the sign above the quaint little elegant looking shop in front of you.

The name Manon's Bijouterie was printed above the entrance, elegantly curled in a feminine looking font. Your stomach dropped to your feet. You should of seen this coming.

He was going to propose.

And of course he wanted his best friend to help him choose the perfect ring. You gulped and looked up at the man beside you, a sheepish grin on his face. "You sure you ready to pop the question?" You asked him, trying to keep your voice a teasing tone, despite the shakiness hidden underneath. He laughed nervously but answered determined nonetheless. "I'm sure." He smiled at you, genuinely happy. You couldn't help but smile back, surprised at the fact that it was genuine as well. Then again, all you ever wanted was for Taeil to be happy, and he was, so by default, you were happy too.

The two of you spent the next hour and a half deciding on a ring. He ended up buying a small and delicate silver ring with a beautiful golden shimmering quartz stone. "It reminded me of her warmth." He had told you, a warm smile spread across his face. "You know, kinda like she's the sun and I'm the moon". He giggled slightly at his confession. “It’s silly i know.” You felt unable to respond in any way, instead resorting to chuckling bitterly at the irony of the fact that you had made that same comparison in the past. Fate really loved to rub salt in your wound. Taeil didn't notice your little change in demeanor though, he was far too immersed in thought as to how he was going to make his proposal as perfect as possible.

That night ended up with flowers once again forcing their way up your throat, scratching at your inner walls and taking drops of blood with them. Hanahaki ,as you had discovered, also had a cruel way of always choosing a flower that reminds you of your unrequited love and for the past years the petals you had coughed up had always belonged to the same flower.

The moonflower.

Ipomoea alba, sometimes called the tropical white morning-glory or moonflower or moon vine, is a species of night-blooming morning glory, native to tropical and subtropical regions of the New World.

“The moonflower requires full to partial sun, so it is important to find it a place where the sun's rays can easily reach it.” This particular sentence had stuck out to you as you had looked up the name of the flower during one of the first times it happened. You almost laughed at how much the universe seemed to love irony.

In all your time living with the disease you had gotten pretty desensitised to the flowers crawling up your throat. Tonight, however, you broke down in tears. And for the first time in a long time, the fear of death plagued you nightmares.

It was becoming more and more noticeable that your health was slowly deteriorating, gradually becoming worse in the months leading up to the fateful wedding. Taeil and his future wife were far too busy with preparations and their own jobs to realize there was something wrong. In fact, most of your friend group were too wrapped up in their own worlds to notice either, which you were thankful for. You didn't want any questions. You had never told any living soul about your little “issue” and you promised yourself you never would. Unfortunately for you, your good friend Johnny was very perceptive.

He invited you to coffee and you had innocently accepted. How were you to know that he would end up interrogating you? "Y/N, I know there's something wrong. You've been looking really under the weather lately and I'm concerned. Also, before you say anything, know that I won't let up until you tell me." His tone was firm, one of his hands resting comfortably on yours. You loved the fact that Johnny was so caring, you truly did, but right now it was very annoying. "How many times do I have to say it? I'm fine, Johnny. I just have this cold that's been clinging on for longer than it should. That's it." You say as nonchalantly as possible, itching to just change the topic. "Well, I don't believe you." Johnny states matter-of-factly. You roll your eyes at him. "Fine, don't believe me then, but that's all there is to it." He gave you one last disbelieving look but dropped the questions. You released a sigh of relief. However, from that point on you were careful to cover up the paleness of your skin whenever you were around Johnny, aware that he still had his suspicions.

Time had a habit of slipping through your fingers. In seemingly only the blink of an eye it was the night of the rehearsal dinner. You talked with some of the guests and greeted Taeil's parents, admiring the beautiful beachside location the couple had chosen for their ceremony. The venue had a breathtaking view of the ocean, full moon standing tall in the night sky and perfectly visible from the small balcony where guests mingled throughout the evening.

You had started to wear heavier makeup to hide the bags under your eyes, the paleness of your skin and the hollowing of your cheeks. You gave your speech perfectly and had the whole audience, including Taeil, tearing up at your emotional words. You were so numb to the pain in your chest by now that delivering the speech was an easy feat.

That night, as you laid in the bed of the hotel room close to the venue that Taeil had rented for you so you wouldn't have to drive back to your apartment in the night , you looked out at the sky through the huge balcony windows. The same full moon from earlier looking down at you. The moon had caused you so much pain over the years, serving as a constant reminder of the boy whose heart would never be yours. Yet somehow, even after all the suffering, the moon still brought you comfort. Still reminded you of those many nights where you and Taeil gazed up at it's beauty, all your hardships and concerns being swept away by the wind. You smiled at the memory and, somehow, you felt at peace.

There were no flowers that night.

The next day was strangely enough one of the happiest days of your life. You had expected to be close to bursting out into miserable tears every second or to be so numb to everything around you that you wouldn't be able to utter a single word but instead, you found yourself waking up with a weight having been lifted off your shoulders. The whole day you were filled with a sense of happiness.

You sat in the prep room with Michiko, talking and laughing about all kinds of things together with the other bridesmaids. You even told them childhood stories about you and Taeil, something that would normally bring back painful memories. You told them about the times the two of you had secretly snuck out candy from your local convenience store or how you would always prank Taeils older sister on april fools day each year. You even recounted some drunken Taeil tales that had Michiko clutching her stomach in laughter, her makeup artist desperately trying to keep her still as she tried to do her job.

Shortly before the ceremony was set to start, you had located Taeil's fitting room, rasping your knuckles lightly against the door before he uttered a "come in!". You slipped inside the room. Taeil was standing in front of the mirror, nervously arranging his bowtie with a thin sheen of sweat covering his forehead. He looked handsome. In that moment you thought back to the scrawny Taeil you had grown up with. You were so proud of how far he'd come.

Picking up a napkin, you went up to him, turning his body so he would face you. You lightly tapped the napkin against his forehead to remove the droplets of sweat before moving to perfectly set his bowtie. Taeil sighed and smiled at you. "What would I do without you?" "Crash and burn, probably." The both of you chuckled. Taeil looked nervous so you laid a hand on his shoulder as you spoke to him. "Taeil, you're an amazing person and you deserve all the happiness in the world. You both do. And I know you're going to be the best husband ever." He seemed to want to retaliate but you didn't let him. "You can do this. Deep breaths.This is just like playing a sonata in front of a bunch of people. You've done that loads of times." "Yeah but this time I'm not playing the piano. And as far as I know a sonata does not require a lifelong commitment." You gave him a pointed look. "You know what I meant." He smiled at the look on your face and took a breath. "You're right. I can do this." He hugged you before you stepped back out of the room.

"Go get em tiger."

That day you walked the aisle, not as a bride (as you had many times imagined) but as a bridesmaid, and yet, the smile you wore was still blindingly bright. It was like the happiness that filled Taeil on this day was within you too. You found it weird, of course, but there was no itch in your throat and no ache in your heart so you were content.

Everything went smoothly and after the ceremony and the cake-cutting, the real festivities started. You danced with God knows how many people that night and drank quite a few cocktails. You were pretty sure you had danced with Taeil as well at some point. You still faintly recalled seeing his face in front of you as he moved rather dorkily to the music. Your own laughter rang in your ears. It felt as if you were on cloud nine.

Little did you know, that you would soon plummet from said cloud very quickly and very painfully.

You were growing tired and Johnny had offered to walk you down to your hotel room.

That's when it happened.

It was like everything hit you at once. There was a pang in your chest as every ounce of heartbreak you had felt came crashing into you, the pain making you cripple over. You could barely hear Johnny's concerned words over the ringing in your ears, could barely feel his hands trying to hold you steady as every moment of rejection you had ever had played in front of your eyes like a broken record. Suddenly, your throat seared with a burning heat and you were throwing up more flowers than you ever had, the white petals contrasting with the angry red of your blood as they lay on the ground in front of you. The world around you was muffled. You could hear someone's frantic shouting and footsteps but it was distorted, could see flashing lights in your peripheral but everything was spinning. Soon enough, your vision faded to black as you collapsed onto the floor.

You woke up to the beeping of a machine. Slowly trying to open your eyes, you were met with a bright white ceiling and pale blue walls, a window with the curtains only half shut, letting in enough sunlight to let you know it was daytime. You turned your head to the side. A heart monitor. That confirmed the fact that you were, indeed, in a hospital. Your throat still burned slightly, a bitter aftertaste of blood in your mouth.

The door opened carefully and a nurse’s head popped in. "Oh, you're awake!" She spoke chirpily as she met your eyes. "Your friends will be happy to hear that. I'll go let them know as soon as I take your vitals. Is that ok?" You nodded, afraid that if you opened your mouth to speak, a river of flowers and blood would spill out. Her gaze met yours a couple of times as she took your vitals. She always smiled at you, but there was an underlying sadness behind it, maybe sympathy or pity. You couldn't blame her, you were in a pretty pitiful situation.

She left the room and soon after, Johnny appeared before you. "Hey you." He smiled, trying to sound as happy as he was normally, probably to make you feel better. It didn't, but you were appreciative of his attempt. "Johnny." You croaked out and his eyes flitted to yours.

"What happened?"

Johnny explained that he had called the ambulance as soon as he saw the petals and that Taeil had come running frantically as he got wind of the situation.The ambulance had promptly arrived near the chapel and he guessed that most of the guests knew by now. Taeil and Michiko were both here at the hospital all night, same as Johnny. They had only stepped out half an hour ago to get a late breakfast.

You frowned. You felt bad for ruining your best friend's wedding, one of the most important events in his life. You were brought out of your thoughts by Johnny. "Just a cold that's been clinging on for longer than it should huh?" He quoted your words back to you and you shrugged, not really knowing what to say. You felt bad for lying to Johnny too. He let out a frustrated sigh. "How could you not tell me about this? Or anyone, for that matter? I mean, I can understand that you wouldn't want to tell me, maybe we aren't close like that.” You winced at his words. “But not even your family? Not even Taeil?" You laughed bitterly at that last part, which then turned into a choked sob, tears gathering at your eyes. "Oh God. It's Taeil isn't it?" Johnny whispered in realization. Then you burst into tears. Too much. This was all too much. Sobs wracked through you as Johnny held you, softly patting your hair as he whispered sweet nothings to you.

You calmed down after a few minutes, just in time for the doctor to walk into the room. "Good morning." He greeted the both of you. "I have a few things to discuss with the patient.” He glanced at Johnny. “Normally only family members are allowed to be present but if you want your friend to stay I can allow it." You squeezed Johnny's hand as you turned to talk to him. "You wouldn't mind if I spoke privately with the doctor, would you?" Johnny gave you a reassuring smile as he squeezed your hand back. "Of course not". He gave you a kind smile once again, nodded politely at the doctor and left the room.

"So, miss y/l/n. According to our test, you have had this disease for nearly a decade. Am I correct?

"Yes."

"And during all these years, you were the only one with knowledge of you having this disease?"

"Yes."

"And were you aware that there was a procedure to remove the roots from your lungs?"

"Yes."

"And you knowingly chose not to have this procedure?"

"Yes."

Of course you knew about the removal. That in the early stages you could remove the roots slowly growing inside your lungs before they became too many. Was the reason to not have this removal stupid? Maybe for some people, but not for you. It might sound crazy to anyone else, but the feelings you had for Taeil were a part of you, they were woven into your soul and had, for as long as you could remember, been a part of your life. Losing those feelings would be like losing a part of yourself. Besides, the procedure removed all feelings of love towards the person in question. Wouldn't that also mean you wouldn't even feel platonic love towards Taeil? You couldn't risk losing your friendship with him. Taeil was one of, if not the most important person in your life. You couldn't lose him. You couldn't.

The doctor sighs thoughtfully. "To be honest with you. It's a miracle you've even survived this long. Most people suffering from hanahaki die in the first two years if they do not get it removed.” He looks at you for a reaction, but you do nothing. “The fact that your body has held it off for so long is medically unprecedented. However, the disease has become so advanced that we don't even have the possibility of removal now. And the flowers inside your lungs just keep on increasing in quantity. At this rate, I'm afraid the time you have left is at best... three days." You swallowed hard at that last sentence. All these years you had known this day would come. You had prepared for it, trained yourself to not feel fear in the face of death. Yet here you were, and the thought of your life ending still absolutely terrified you.

Seeing as you didn't respond, the doctor figured you might want some time to process the information he had just loaded onto you, so he cleared his throat. "I'll leave you to-" "Is it possible that my friends not be informed of how much time I have left?" The doctor blinked a few times before he answered. "Legally, we only have the obligation to inform your family of your condition so yes, your friends do not have to receive that information. But are you sure-" You cut him off again. "I'm sure" You spoke firmly and the doctor nodded, turning to exit the room but you stopped him once more. "One last question." He turned back to face you. "Does it hurt?" You asked, voice barely above a whisper. The doctor looked at you with sympathy in his eyes. You didn't have to say it, he knew what you were referring to. "I wish I could tell you otherwise… but death by hanahaki disease makes the person suffer a great deal." You nodded at him to continue. He sighed. "The plants will build up to the point that they pierce through the tissue of the lungs, filling them with blood, which the person will then start to cough up as the lungs tear apart from within and the person will start choking as they are no longer able to breathe. The whole process can take up to a few minutes." He spoke calmly and you absorbed all the information, leaning back on your bed, not being able to avoid picturing the scenario in your head.

You told the doctor he could go so he left the room. Only a few minutes passed before Taeil entered the room. His hair was slightly tousled and the dress shirt he wore was wrinkled and untucked. He looked tired and stressed out and your heart ached at the sight. He came to sit down on the chair next to your bed, clasping his hands together and placing them on your bed before laying his head on top of them, his face not visible to you. He inhaled and exhaled deeply, as if preparing for something. Slowly he lifted his head but his gaze still wouldn't meet yours.

"Is it me? Is it because of me that you've suffered all these years?" Taeil's voice came out raw and pained, the quiet sound would have barely been heard if it wasn't for the fact that the room was deathly silent. You bit your lip, you had to tell him. Your hand moved to comb through his hair and he let you,the gesture a comfort to him as much as it was to you. You didn't quite know how to start so you just went with your gut feeling "I don't regret loving you. If I did, I would have had the roots removed but I couldn't-" "Why didn't you?" Taeil stood up abruptly, his voice suddenly much louder in volume. "Why in the hell didn't you get it removed? Why? Why? When you knew that it could kill you!" He was yelling now, tone strained and desperate and you felt hot tears gather in your eyes all over again. "I couldn't risk losing you! I've loved you my whole life Taeil!" "But I haven't. I never loved you like that and you knew it." Your heart broke at his words. It was one thing to be aware of it but another entirely to hear the words directly out of Taeil's mouth.

He raked his hands roughly through his hair in frustration. He was angry, that much was obvious. "Why couldn't you just think of yourself for once? And why did you have to be so-...so stupid as to not tell anyone? Why-" His voice gave out at the end, a sob threatening to spill from his throat. Taeil had always loved you, just not in the same way. The fact that this was the reason that you might lose you was excruciatingly painful for him. He looked over at you, saw the silent tears rolling down your hollowed cheeks and the way your formerly vibrant eyes seemed to have lost all it's color. It felt horrible to see you like that and he mentally cursed himself for not noticing sooner. For not helping. For being a terrible excuse for a best friend.

Neither of you said anything for a while until you broke the quiet. "I'm sorry..." You looked at Taeil as you said it. You were sorry. Sorry for Taeil and the fact that he was the one you fell in love with, which wasn't his fault. Sorry for your friends and family whom you had kept this a secret from all these years.

But most of all, you were sorry for yourself, for falling in love with the one boy you would never be able to have.

Taeil stepped towards you and enveloped you in hug. Unbeknownst to you, you had started crying once again. You were tired of crying by now, tired of everything, in all honesty. As Taeil held you and tried to calm you down it was like you knew that your end was close, even closer than the doctor had predicted.

In that moment, you made a decision.

After a few more minutes your cries had ceased. "Taeil? Could you do me a favor?" His eyes met yours as you talked. You saw anger, sadness but mostly fear swimming in his dark orbs. obrs that still shimmered like the moon in the sky, even after all these years. He nodded nonetheless. "Remember that bakery we used to go to all the time when we were in college? It had my favorite chocolate muffins ever. If I recall correctly, it's somewhere near here. Would you mind getting me one, please?" Taeil's brows scrunched up slightly at the odd request. "Please?" You added, trying hard not to sound desperate. "Of course." He said and gave you a small smile.

He stepped towards the door, opening it before glancing back at you one last time. "Should I tell the others to come in?" He asked. "No, that's ok. I'd like to get a little rest to be honest." You chuckled softly and gave him a reassuring smile. "Ok." His eyes flitted over you briefly. Clearly, he was nervous about leaving you alone. Eventually he gave a light sigh. "Well, I'll see you later then."

"Yeah, see you later Taeil."

The door clicked shut behind him and you reached for your phone. There was something you had to do. You scrolled through your notes until you found the one labeled "for my parents" which was a letter you had written a while ago in the event of your death, to say goodbye. You copied and pasted the text into an email and sent it. Then you went through your files to retrieve a video labeled as "taeil". You had recorded the video months before, on a night were you had coughed up so many flowers you had thought it would be your last. You attached the video into another email, finger hovering above the send button. You waited about twenty minutes, the itch in your throat and the ache inside your body getting worse every minute until it was almost unbearable. And as the flowers started to force themselves out, you hit send.

Taeil knew something had happened as soon as he entered the hospital wing you were stationed at. His phone buzzed in his pocket and he fished it out, looking at the notification that lit up his lock screen.

[1 new email]

from y/n

goodbye taeil

(no body)

[1 attachment] - taeil.mp4

His blood ran cold and suddenly he was running frantically to get to your room. His phone had started buzzing again. He turned the corner and his eyes met Michiko, taking notice of the tears running down her cheeks as she held her phone next to her ear. He stopped dead in his tracks, the squeaking of his shoes alerting Michiko to his presence. She slowly lowered the phone as she locked gazes with Taeil. His eyes flitted downwards as she mouthed the words “I’m so sorry.”.

It was then and there that Taeil’s world froze in place. No. No. No, no, no, no, no. This was not happening. This was not was not happening. This wasn't real. It wasn't. She couldnt be dead.

Could she?

He felt the impact of Michiko running up to him and wrapping her arms around his shoulders. Felt her nails digging into the fabric of his jean jacket as she held him tightly, desperately trying to ground him. He noticed as his tears dropped onto her shoulder, heard his heavy intakes of breaths ringing in his ear, but he felt as if he wasn't truly there.

You. The one person in his life he had taken for granted. The one person who was always, always there. A constant presence he could count on. You weren't supposed to leave. You were supposed to be there forever.

But now,

you were gone.

And you were never coming back.

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jj-ktae · 5 years

Text

Erotica - Epilogue - (M)

Pairing: Im Jaebum x Reader Genre: SMUT Summary: You’re a rookie porn actress on the rise and everything goes well until you get offered a role in a big-budget porn movie, starring the most famous actor in the porn industry. Words: 2515 Warning: Read at your own risk Erotica was banned from the Tumblr search engine so it appears nowhere no matter which tags I use and you can only find it in my masterlist or in your dashboard. Might as well link the previous chapters and my masterlist here lol

MASTERLIST

- Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Epilogue -

Epilogue

Im Jaebum is funny.

You wouldn’t be able to explain the past two years without wailing. He has one or two flaws, most of them involving his laziness but nothing out of the ordinary.

It’s like he was made for you.

Today is the last day of his career. Jaebum has an interview for one of these magazines you always refused to appear in and he will be done with porn forever. It’s a day to celebrate, not only because you’re both out of the porn industry, but also because it’s the beginning of a new life.  Erotica made you earn a lot of money and allowed Jaebum to invest into an old building to transform it into an apartment complex.

So naturally, he left this job after months of struggling with the idea of dating someone who regularly has sex with other people. It was hard for Jaebum, but he had no other choice.

It’s the first serious talk you both had, right after your first official night as a couple. You ended up accepting the fact that he had to keep working until the end of his contract, just like he had to accept the fact that you too, had other things planned before quitting.

You found yourself stopping before he did and started looking for another job, while he filmed his last movies as JB the porn star.

Tonight is a celebration yet Jaebum insisted on staying home and enjoy a peaceful night together. He brought food and wine, along with a pretty necklace that he insisted you should wear every minute of your life.

Your stomach is still full as you’re lying flat on your bed. It’s a hot summer day and not even the cool breeze is enough to electrify your moist body. You’re somehow lost in your thoughts, from the stress coming along with your new job to the relationship you’ve spent month building with Jaebum.

Said Jaebum aims for your attention when he sees you all spaced out, visibly full of food and ready to doze off.

He refuses to blame your hazy state on the slow sex you both just had.

“What are you thinking about?” He takes in the sight of your naked body, hand pressing against your burning skin as he leans a little bit to rest his head over your body. He finds shelter near your hipbone where he nibs at the skin before blowing cool air over it. “You look so serious.”

Jaebum isn’t used to you being so unaware of your surroundings. You’re so cautious of everything you do to forget about everything else but now you seem unfocused, not even bothered by the fact that he is drawing tiny patterns on your thigh.

“My tummy’s about to burst.”

He chuckles, biting at the tiny bulge under your navel. “You ate so well…” he mocks, kissing the spot when you start wriggling, falsely annoyed.  “Seriously though, I was thinking about you.” You add, barely lifting your head to meet his questioning gaze. He rests atop of your hip bone, body leaning sideways and arm around your naked waist.

Jaebum even looks pleased, his teasing smile replaced with an expectant gaze. “And what about me?”

You sigh, moving your free leg so it would reach a cooler part of the bedding. “I was thinking about how crazy it is that we ended up dating when we were both porn actors.” You shift a little when Jaebum nods, his chin tickling your skin.

He muses, eyes reaching for the roof as a sign of his reflection. “I think it makes sense. I don’t think anyone can accept that job, let alone introduce a porn actor to their parents.”

“Your parents know.” You scoff. Even his family is chill.

He shrugs, mouth going to your stomach to kiss it. “My parents are supportive, that’s all.” He waits a moment, before lifting his head again. “Not that your mother isn’t, of course.”

You chuckle, nodding. “My mother would have a heart attack. At least I’m really working as a waitress, now.”

Jaebum coughs, moving on the mattress so he can finally reach your level before grabbing your leg to circle it around his naked waist. “Speaking of which, are you sure you want to work as a waitress?”

He has that tone you only hear when something upsets him. Jaebum barely gets mad and even if he does, it starts slowly, like a warning before the actual storm.

But as he nudges you to press his face against your neck, he sighs. “I’m worried about people recognising you and annoying you.”

“Babe I was a porn actress, not Angelina Jolie.” You try to mock him but he doesn’t buy your shit and tightens his hold instead.

“It’s worse. They might think you’re easy or some shit like that.” His hand goes to your side to tickle you and you giggle, leg kicking his butt. “I’ll have to come and check on you every night.” He sounds so dramatic, but his smile can’t be missed. “I’ll be careful.”

“You could be my secretary instead. That way, we can live a real-life porn. ‘Hot secretary fucks angry boss in his office’.” Jaebum laughs when you make a funny face, yet goes back on serious mode, arm tightening your leg around him and it’s starting to be too pleasing to focus on whatever he is saying.

You sigh when he rolls his hips, his flesh rubbing against you. “Seriously though, I’m not fond of this idea…” he trails off, voice laced with a craving you could never get enough of.

You can’t help but whimper, lips parting as you shift toward his chest and breast finding shelter against his broad body. “I never pegged you as the possessive type,” you reach for his neck, bringing him closer until his breath fans your face, hurried. “You didn’t seem to care until I ended my contract with my agency.”

Jaebum hums, the probability of a serious conversation out the window if his growing erection is anything to go by. He rolls his eyes, “Porn is porn, nightlife is different.” His position changes just enough for him to lean and still a short kiss. “Now that we’re both out of this, I don’t plan on sharing you, rookie.”

You tap his shoulder lightly, the sound of your hand slapping his skin stronger than the actual damage it caused. “Stop calling me rookie!”

Your boyfriend choses to stay silent, leaving you expectant as he pushes you onto your back. “Anyways, don’t get mad at me for being petty about you being molested in a bar in the middle of the night.” Before you can protest he plunges, aiming for your collarbone which he attacks vividly. His teeth graze upon the hidden bone, drawing shivers and goose bumps all over your body. He snickers in the middle of silence. “I’ll have to beat up the pervs.”

You wriggle against the sheets, laughter mixed with pleasure as he darts his tongue to trail a path down your chest. “So virile…” you sigh, earning a hidden shrug from a busy Jaebum.

“Yeah?” He smooches your warm skin, liking how unforgiving he sounds.

It’s cute in a way. Jaebum never had to show anything but acceptance toward your job, considering he was still a porn actor himself. Maybe he had it harder than you thought. You understand him though; it’s not cool to greet your boyfriend when he was banging another girl the same day.

“I don’t think I’ll ever have enough of you, rookie…” He whispers and slides on the bed, head back on your stomach and creating messy patterns over your skin. You almost break right there, the confession unusual but not unpleasant.

Jaebum never imagined he could have such stamina. His sexual life was close to non-existent before he met you and his physical interactions were limited to the scenes he filmed in the studio. It had ruined his personal life with such ease, turning sex into a duty rather than a necessity and killing his hormones with a slow and numb burn. When he started filming with you and felt the tingling sensation again, he understood right away.

He couldn’t thank you enough for sticking around and waking him up from his creepy slumber made of daddy kinks and choking in front of cameras. Thanks to you he built up the courage to start his project and stop his career, turning him into more than a guy who has sex for money. He is such a bad actor anyways.

DVDs and CDs are neat into your shared apartment, like a silent memory of something none of you regret doing. Yet it doesn’t mean he will ever miss it.

You forget about whatever names he called you when he reaches your pubis, mouth watering and dropping tiny patches of saliva over the heated flesh.

You almost knock your head against the wall when the first lick falls. It’s insistent and slow, devastating in the sea of your needs as Jaebum knows exactly what pace to use to make you crazy.

It’s something you discovered with time. Jaebum is into slow and deep thrusts, soft doggie style, lazy morning sex and it’s a mixture of finesse and bestiality, along with loving words. He is comfortable for he isn’t disturbed by nudity, can say whatever he wants without sounding creepy and barely has any requirements when it comes to sex.

He welcomes all your faults and imperfections the same way you do and none of you bother with petty fights, the words too heavy to question a future you both want. Jaebum has that honesty which leaves little room for misunderstanding. He confessed the same night he brought you to his flat yet didn’t force anything on you.

And you love him just that way.

You gasp when he grabs your ankles and bends your legs, nestling them on either side of your body to reveal more of you. He barely goes wild and you suspect he is trying to prove a point but your brain shuts down when his tongue probes at your opening, teasing just enough to collect wetness and smear it over your folds. You glance down to peek at the beautiful scene but Jaebum is already looking at you, pleased by your bewildered face and flustered cheeks.

He dips down a second time, eyes darkening and tongue out to lap every engorged part of your pussy. He stops just long enough to show you how he licks his lips and goes down again, head shaking from right to left and making you roll your pelvis against his restless mouth.

You still gather yourself to make fun of him. “Are we…filming…again…?” It’s hard to speak between moans yet your voice is loud and clear, breathless. Jaebum doesn’t like your teasing and attacks you even harder, the hint of a smirk hardly hidden behind his brown locks. He even hums teasingly, the vibration of his deep sounds shaking your flesh.  He doesn’t slow down even when your orgasm hits. You jerk away from his mouth, moaning and grunting but he keeps you in place until you can only shake. It burns your body from every pore, mixing with your blood like a shot of strong alcohol and making your vision blind with pleasure. You complain and beg for him to stop and he only releases you when you freeze from the overstimulation, unable to function anymore.

You shake your head, a false accusation painting your exhausted features as you glance at a smiling Jaebum whose hand is wiping the remains of your climax from his smiling and reddish lips  Your legs fall, lifeless on the bed but you can’t let him suffer. His penis is hard and threatening, the bulbous head a deep shade of red and length swollen by the numerous veins.

He pumps himself slowly, tilting his head to the side. He raises one eyebrow. “You okay?” he rasps.

You nod, deciding to play along with his celebration sex and rolling on your stomach. You raise your butt just enough for him to grab it and rub himself between your asscheeks, grunting.

“You’re so beautiful…” He whispers, free hand running along your curves and stopping by your drenched pussy to play with your clit. “So damn beautiful…”

He penetrates you slowly, his willpower winning the inner battle of his arousal against his brain. You breathe out, searching for air and dipping your head into the pillow.

“Come here.”

Jaebum commands, already reaching for your body so you can lean against him. He sticks your bodies and starts moving his hips, penis sliding deep inside you.

He finds a good pace right away, from the tip of his dick poking out to the base hitting your asscheeks, Jaebum knows how to burry himself inside you. It feels amazing, the pressure from the position and your needy moans lulling him toward an orgasm he can call his own private pleasure.

He is infatuated the way you mould with him. He loves pinching the tender skin of your nipple as his hand cups your perfect breast, he enjoys the way your head finds its home into the crook of his neck and he can’t stop himself from tilting your head steal numerous kisses.

You open your mouth eagerly, tongue out to play against his own in a carnivorous embrace. He bites and sucks on your lips, his sighs spilling from his parted lips whenever the tip of his cock hits a specific spot inside you.

You arch until your back hurts, looking for more stimulation and nearing your second orgasm. Jaebum is struggling, you can feel it from the way his abs tense behind you. He is all stiff, all ready to fill you up yet not giving in.

You know his body language by heart.

You collapse against him when a second wave of pleasure hits you. It breaks your bones and destroys your muscles, leaving your lifeless against a panting Jaebum who can only suffer from the contractions around him. The waves of pleasure hit you as much as they hit him, sending you both into another universe.

He allows himself to cum right when you’re done and he is satisfied with the pleasure he gave you. You’re nothing but a dead weight against his chest, eyes closed and smile smug as you giggle to yourself because your brain is messed up and you can’t think straight.

You still wonder how can someone be so skilled at sex.

Jaebum lets you rest on the bed, not the least bothered by the mess he creates when he pulls out of you.

Instead he wraps you around him again, hugging you close and kissing your nose.

“This is what I call a celebration, rookie. Who needs Erotica when I have you all to myself?” He muses, fingers rubbing against your cheekbones while he pecks you once more.

You giggle, head shaking at this boy’s antics. He can be such a dork.

“The pleasure is mutual.”

AN : Erotica is officially over! Thank you all so much for following this series (I see you, naughty readers). I’m sad that it’s over and I’m going to miss Porn actor Jaebum but Priest Jinyoung is waiting for me so I’m off to new adventures ! Thank you for the support and love you sent me through this series, I love yall!

#Jaebeom #jaebum #im jaebum #im jaebeom #im jaeboem #got7 jaebum #jaebum got7 #im jaebum got7 #jaebum x reader #why do I even tag this #lol enjoy #thx again for reading!#jaebum au #jaebum smut

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hyunjinssmile · 5 years

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“Lyrics For You”; Han Jisung

Disclaimers:

Descriptions of sex, dirty talk, angst, fluff, swearing, friends with benefits -> lovers,

Also, excuse my handwriting in this, as well as the lyrics (theyre mine and already in a released song, (aside from the my head hurts; thats for plot)

It was the usual, by now.

He would come home from practice, or hanging out with the boys, and then have you waiting for him, ready for him, to take care of him. It only really took one call; a message even, and you were both there for eachother, but dont get ahead of yourself y/n, you arent in a relationship.

Since highschool, you were both close, really close, but not in a relationship sense. Both of you produced music together and danced together, and even now after he has debuted, it just easier for him to have you; no strings attached, plus the world already knew you as 3rachas friend; a producer that made sure they would eat and rest, stays around the world thanked you for that the most.

Basically, somewhere along the line, Jisung and yourself became more than friends. You became friends with benefits, and unfortunately for you; like the plot of the 2013 Smuts on wattpad, you had fallen for him.

You had fallen for Han Jisung.

Would you ever tell him? Definitely not. Especially since after everytime you both hang out alone, he always thanks you so much for being his friend and understanding his situation, saying he loves how things always are.

“Y-yeah! Its fine” you smile at him as he puts on his clothes, after getting a call from JYP to come to practice earlier than he expected, to which he jumped up and got into the shower.

To be quite honest, the sex was distant. It was passionate, but quite clearly he was distancing himself from being intimate, he would never call you by anything other than your name, no pet names, and hed always take you from behind, never looking into your eyes. It was rushed, and rough, and although you found it incredibly hot and arousing, the emotions, rather the lack thereof, made you sad. It stopped you from enjoying it as much, you loved being close to him, and since he obviously didnt like you like you liked him, this was the closest youd get to it, to him.

It wasnt fine, as he shut the door, mumbling a goodbye and a promise to call you later, your hips hurt, you couldnt walk properly, and your heart ached. It ached for him, because of him.

You reached for your laptop beside you, wincing at the shocks of pain in your hips, before starting to make something, you needed to get your emotions out.

You work on a beat, the notes holding a sad feeling in your gut as you manage to get up from the bed, chucking on one of jisungs shirts that he had left from countless sleepovers, because even now, with the benefits part, he was still your best friend. You waddled your way to your studio, one that was often used by chris and changbin, as well as jisung, as when one of your songs you produced blew up; you could afford an apartment with a personal studio.

You sat down in your chair, cursing at the way you relaxed at the smell of jisungs shirt, before letting the beat play around you, adding in some tonal melodies ontop, before scribbling down some lyrics.

Time had flown by, and you got caught up in the process, the melodies and lyrics meaning so much to you, that tears ran down your face, your heart hurt, and this was how you were going to let it out.

Your phone had been going off in your room for ages, too caught up, you failed to recieve the messages from jisung, and in a panic, he travelled to your place.

Apon entering your apartment, he was met with a heavy bassline, but a slow, almost sad melody- contrast to your usual upbeat songs.

Jisung had liked you since he met you, but when he decided he wanted to persue being an idol, a producer, he knew he could never date- at least not in the public eye. You were his best friend, and after one night when you got closer, you both never looked back, friends with benefits was something that suited you both; well, judging by how quick you were to agree on the title; it suited you at least.

He wanted you to himself, he could only think of having you always in his arms, calling you his own, rather than the plaguing thoughts of you in a bed of someone else, but who was he to tell you not to? You werent exclusive, he made that clear. He groans at his stupidity, before walking to your studio, the lights were off as always, but he saw you hunched over your desk, the music blaring through the speakers next to you.

“Y/n?” He called out, before turning the music down, being left with your broken sobs as his eyes widened. You looked up in surprise, to find him standing there, wiping your eyes and attemtping to smile.

“Hey- jisung!” You said trying to be happy, which only made him more concerned.

“Whats wrong?” He said immediately,

“N-nothing, just writing something.” You tried to convice yourself you were fine for a moment, hiding the lyrics under your arms.

“Youre crying?” He moved closer to you, “and this is a sad song, y/n, you dont write sad songs, whats up?” He pauses, playing the devils advocate “boy troubles?”

You could only dryly laugh, “yes, actually”

Jisung felt his heart drop, before moving closer to you, trying to peer at the lyrics, watching you hide them. “Can i read?” He asked softly.

“No.” You said without looking at him, making him more confused. He tried to grab them, moving around, but each time you covered it, until he grabbed it from you.

“Jisung- just give it back-“

He held the page in his hands as he read it,

“Who is it?” He said softly, genuine care in his voice.

“Just give it back!” You stood up, making his eyes fall to your smaller figure, the shirt immediately recognised as his own.

He couldnt help but smile at the way you jumped to try and get it back from him, your cheeks pink, tears in the corner of your eyes.

“So you like someone? Maybe we should stop this” he gestured at the both of you, trying to conceal his hurt.

“What?” You said softly, your eyes widened.

“We should call this quits, us, ill find someone else” he was being casual, he knew it would hurt you, but it hurt him that you liked someone else, while he fucked you into the mattress every other night.

“Jisu-“

“You know, i thought i liked you, for a little while. I wont hide it. But, id hate to be the guy you liked if you fucked someone else while writing sappy song lyrics about them.”

He was being mean, really mean.

“I dont like you anymore, and were done.” His voice was cold, and the tears kept falling from your eyes, wide open with shock.

“You- I- the lyrics-“ you tried to speak softly, but he was mad. “Am i not good enough for you? Hm? Do i mean nothing?” He kept going.

“Get out” you whispered, eyes full with tears.

“What?” He was taken aback, you had never told him to leave, even during arguments.

“I SAID GET OUT”

And he was gone,

He took the paper with him, reading it in pain and ager the whole way back to the dorm, slamming the door behind him as he entered.

Chris was the first to talk to him, asking what was wrong. The boy crumbled in his arms, explaining everything, even mentioning how you two were friends with benefits, making chris surprised yet it suddenly all clicked.

“Let me see the lyrics”

As chris held the lyrics up infront of him, jisungs eyes widened as he saw a name scribbled on the back, immense guilt filling his entire being as he lost all air from his lungs.

“H-hyung move- move your hand for a second-“

Dread filled him, as he immediately got up, running as fast as his legs took him down the hall, out the door and out onto the street, running to your house, with tears in his eyes.

“You fucking idiot” he whined to himself as tears fell down his face, the colder air from winter bit at the skin on his face, but he kept running, until he was at your door, walking in, and running straight to your studio, finding you lying on the ground, crying your heart out and from experience, having a panic attack.

He immediately ran to you, picking you up and taking you to your room, placing you on the bed, looking at the way your eyes widened at his presence.

“W-why-“ you tried to speak, but he just held you tighter, pulling your body against his in a tigh hold, arms around you, squeezing you against his chest, your face pressed into his shoulder, as he cried into your own.

It would always calm you down, his hugs. Whenever you had panic attacs when you were younger, jisung was there, there to squeeze you and make you realise youre not alone.

“Im here- im here baby- shh-“

Endless petnames flew from his mouth as he helped you calm down, his nimble fingers wiping your tears away gently, his eyes reflecting your own.

“Im an idiot-“ he started slowly,

“Yes you are” you said softly, voice broken.

“I deserve it if you hate me, y/n. Im so sorry, even all this time id been using you because i thought you didnt like me enough to go out with me- and because of my job , i thought this was the closest id get to having you-“

“You have me” you whispered softly, making his eyes widen. “I felt the exact same way, you dumbass “ you said, looking up at him.

“So i could have been making you mine this whole time, taking you out, but all ive done is fucked you roughly, never said anything and had no emotion, all the times you said you were fine-“ his eyes widened again at the realisation of how it must have hurt you, confused you.

“Baby i am so, so fucking sorry.”

You held him closer to you, tightening your own grip as he rested his head in the crook of your neck, his breath fanning warm heat onto the surface.

“Ive never kissed you?” He suddenly said, breaking the silence, moving from his place on your chest , gour hands slipping from his soft locks of hair. You had talked for a while, sorting out how you felt and what you wanted, and then lay in silence, in eachothers arms for a few hours.

“No, you haven-“

He cut you off, pressing his soft lips against your own, his right hand cupping your jaw as he let himself wiggle between your legs, laying ontop of you and covering your body with his own, the feeling of him finally pouring all his love for you out, yourself doing the same, sent you both into an overflow of emotion, he pulled back, observing the way your cheeks tinged pink, his eyes locking with yours as he admired them, the view of you pinned beneath him, hair flowing our around you, made his heart skip a beat, his eyes landing on your now swollen lips from the kiss, warmth filling his being as he admired your beauty.

“Youre so beautiful, y/n, your eyes, your lips, your hair, your smile, your laugh, your jokes, your little pout, the way you stumble sometimes when you walk-“ he was blabbering, he knew it, but your heart filled with so much happiness, “i notice it all, i really do love you y/n. Be mine?”

“Im yours” you said softly, making him smile.

“Now to do this properly..” his hands dragged your underwear down your legs, removing his shirt from your frame as he undressed himself.

You immediately got onto your hands and knees, making him chuckle, immediately grabing your hips and pushing you back onto the bed, your back against the sheets as you gasped in surprise at his show of strength.

“I want to watch you as i make love to you, i want to watch your expression as i fuck this tight pussy, make it mine, youre mine, right?”

You nodded, making him smile down at you lovingly, pressing his lips to yours as he kissed you passionately, his fingers trailing down to your heat as he felt your wetness, his eyes widening is surprise “youre so fucking wet, you needed this huh? Making love is much better, i agree, im harder than ive ever been right now baby” he groaned, before letting one of his fingers enter you, slipping inside before moving so his hips are inline with your own, kissing up your neck to your lips before pushing himself inside of you, his hands holding your hips down against the mattress as he bottomed out, a whine falling from his lips as you whimpered into his ear, his brows furrowed as his lips found yours again, smiling against them as you did the same. “Feels so much fucking better, knowing that youre mine, baby.”

Bonus, 2 months later:

“This is such a good song, Chris, whats the chorus?” Your voice was happy as jisung held you close to him, his arms around your waist as you both sat on the couch in your studio, cuddling into eachother.

“I got inspiration from you two drama queens really. “

“Really?” You both turned to eachother, looking in eachothers eyes, finding nothing but happiness in eachother.

“Yeah, I used some of yours actually y/n.”

“Thats fine, you gave me some last season.” You reassured, smiling.

Chan smiled and pressed play on the chorus of the song, the lead up including a muffled audio scream, before you heard it;

“My head hurts”

Side note:

I actually write, make and produce some music too, so i felt quite close to this story. The emotions running wild whilst writing can really get heavy, and i actually do find myself crying whilst recording a demo, or writing the score, its the same with writing a fic, dont worry if its angst im crying along with ya, its just passion and heartache mixed together in a cocktail of emotions.

Lmao thats another one of my lyrics, ok ill stop thankyou for reading

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ayellowcurtain · 5 years

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please do part 3 I need it

we need a part 3 where eliott is ok and they explain everything and just talk it out with lots of fluff

I need part 3 of the Eliott/Mika/Lucas drama please

im hoping there is a part three comingg?

omg you need to write another part but eliott and lucas talking about that eliott’s pic! eliott telling lucas that he is his only love

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When Lucas wakes up on Sunday morning, he can feel his arms sore, still around Eliott’s waist. The other one seems to be sleeping, but Lucas doesn’t risk opening his eyes to double check.

He saw the high highs on Friday night and on Saturday’s morning and while he tried to talk to Eliott after they watched some movies, he could feel the lows starting to surround his boyfriend. He couldn’t bring himself to care more about that photo than about Eliott falling apart right in front of him.

Opening his eyes slowly, Lucas finds Eliott sleeping close to him, his parted lips blowing a calm, warm air against Lucas’ forehead. He takes his arms off of Eliott slowly, stretching a little but keeping his eyes on Eliott, not wanting to wake him up, too scared of how Eliott will be feeling when he wakes up.

Seeing him upset breaks Lucas’ heart every time and this is even worse. He feels guilty for screaming at his face on Friday, threatening to break up with him. Eliott is still on Friday’s clothes.

Lucas gets up slowly, trying not to move the mattress too much, closing the curtains so the sun won’t wake Eliott up and he opens his closet quietly, getting some clean clothes for Eliott to put if he feels like it when he wakes up. That leather jacket must be bothering him by now.

He leaves the pile of clothes that he chose on the floor by Eliott’s side and he opens the bedroom door, checking if the flat it’s empty. He rushes to the kitchen, getting a big bottle of water and the chocolate croissants that Eliott baked yesterday, going back to his bedroom and locking the door.

“Hi” Eliott’s voice is rough, catching Lucas off guard as he puts everything on the table, he coughs a few times, turning around and lying on his back, not bothering to open his eyes again.

“Hey...” Lucas can’t help the smile on his lips, sitting on the bed, looking at Eliott who is not moving again, probably falling back asleep. He comes closer, propping his chin on Eliott’s shoulder. “You don’t want me to help you get out of this clothes? So you can sleep better...”

He’s not sure if he’s gonna get an answer, but Eliott nods after a minute, not moving more than enough to get rid of his jacket and shirt at the same time in one go, pulling everything by the neck, throwing it to the side. Eliott doesn’t seem to mind his jeans, not moving his legs, but Lucas checks with him.

“You’re gonna keep the pants?” Eliott doesn’t answer, so Lucas assumes he’ll keep the pants. He looks at the older one, looking so relaxed, but Lucas knows that’s not how he feels. So he takes his hoodie off, putting it on Eliott’s chest and putting Eliott’s hand on top of it. Again, it takes a few seconds, but Eliott moves, putting Lucas’ hoodie on and then turning to his side, pulling the hood over his messy hair.

Lucas watches him for a while, lying down slowly and Eliott doesn’t fight when he puts a leg in between his two and the other one around Eliott’s waist, pulling his body closer, an arm around his neck, his fingertips massaging the nape of his neck.

He stays quiet for a little, just admiring his boyfriend. Eliott doesn’t seem to be sleeping, but his eyes are closed, probably avoiding any type of conversation he doesn’t want to have.

“Thank you for the croissants, I ate one earlier. Maybe you’re not such a terrible cook.” No response, no movement, but that’s ok. Lucas feels like talking, to himself or to Eliott if he wants to listen too.

“It’s been nearly 48 hours since you last kissed me, can you believe it? I feel like I’m gonna start to shake and crave it soon.”

“I doubt it.” Eliott whispers after a second as Lucas was starting to talk again, making Lucas smile because he finally got something back from Eliott.

“I don’t, really. But I can wait, it’s good enough to be here, cuddling. Life is way better with you in it. I’m more than happy to spend the rest of my days with you. Minute by minute.”

“I don’t think we’re gonna make it.”

“I know we are. You know, one of these days I read somewhere that your soulmate looks like you, you know, you and your person are so perfect for each other that, physically, soulmates would look alike. And we have a lot of similarities. Dark hair, bright eyes, we have very similar noses!”

Eliott gives him the tiniest smile, just the corners of his lips turning up slightly. Lucas pulls him even closer by the waist, smiling as well.

“You’re stuck with me, I guess. I miss you, I dream about you every day. I'm the luckiest man alive to have you by my side”

Lucas is still hurt, his heart is broken, but they’ll have time to fix things another time. Now he just needs to be there for Eliott.

#skam france #elu fic #Lucas Lallemant #eliott demaury #elu

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littlebitoffanfic · 5 years

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Instinct

Fandom: Jeepers Creepers Character: Creeper Relationship: Creeper/reader Request: Do you think you can write one with The Creeper from Jeepers Creepers where the reader is pregnant with ensues a lot of fluff and whispering sweet nothings to one another? Then they go into Labour? Bonus if they're like the Creeper with their own unique skills. If that's too much trouble because you don't know enough about him. Then maybe do it with slashers as headcannons such as Jason, Lizard, Michael Myers, Pennywise? Sorry its a long one, but know i do genuinely enjoy your works. A.N: both? Both. Both is good. You stood on the roof of the old farm house, waiting anxiously. But you had nothing to worry about when you saw your other half fly up and land on the side of the roof. The human he carried struggled in his hand but it was no match for your partner. a soft snarl left his lips as he held the human out to you. You knew what he wanted to know. “Which part?” His growl and movements asked you. You walked closer, sniffing the area. It was a little harder because at this point, your sense of smell was drawn to creeper, but you had to single out what it was you were craving. “Lung. The right one.” You spoke, sure f yourself. Creeper cocked his head to the side, surprised by how precise you were being. Of the two of you, he was the most picky. But since your current change in ‘circumstance’, you had a very particular taste that needed to be satisfied. Even if it was nearly light out and this was a heavily watched area. Creeper then snapped the neck of the human and when the body dropped to the ground, he started to tear the clothes and skin open to retrieve your treat. your hand ran across your stomach, which only showed the faint outline of pregnancy unlike humans. It was more for defence. Creeper babies are conceived during the time you wake to feed. It develops over two sleeps, so takes about 46 years from conception to labour. You had just woke up from the first sleep, and the second was certainly going to be interesting. Neither you nor Creeper knew you had been pregnant when you had went to sleep, lying as your normally did, side by side with your wings protecting you both individually. But now, you would cuddle into Creeper, resting against him as you encased yourself in your own wings as normal, but his wings would enclose you, protect you and his unborn child. that was all you really knew as did Creeper. It was so uncommon for creatures of your time to cross paths, that actually becoming mates and conceived a child. But as Creeper stood up, offering the lung out of the chest of the human, you couldn’t help but smile and take it. The small movement in your womb told you the baby was excited by the smell alone. So you ate. “We must leave.” Creeper walked up to you, streaming you to the edge of the roof as his eyes darted behind you. You were about to stretch out your wings, but you were swept up into Creepers arms as his own wings spread and he jumped off the roof and taking flight, leaving the body on the roof. you giggled, resting your head on his shoulder and kissing his neck. When you first woke and realised you were pregnant, you didn’t know how he would react. It was so unknown to you both. But he had beamed at you, his eyes darting to your stomach with joy. You came to understand why. He was like you. You had always assumed you would be alone for the rest of your long life, unable to find another of your kind in the short time you were awake. So when you had ben drawn to Creeper the first time by his distinct smell, you couldn’t believe your luck. He had welcomed you with open arms, eager to prove himself to this female and gain a mate and companion. He would show you how he could provide for you, take care of you and make you happy. He offered gift he made, humans for you to feast on and anything your heart desires. You were concerned at first, because you had some human blood in your bloodline. Your skin was different than his, not leathery black, but softer and this made it easier for you to fool humans into trusting you. Your hair covered the webbed claws that only went up to your ear. You had learned English over the years and it was your preferred method of communication, so you had been both stunned and impressed with Creeper had opted to learn for you. The first three sleeps, you would return to your own den, but on the fourth, he asked you to stay with him. And you did. That had been nearly a thousand years ago and you had stayed by his side. When you stayed with him, he got more protective of his domain, making sure that no human could enter while you slept. He would position himself in front of you, acting as a small barrier for you. He was more than you could had wished for, in terms of a partner. He was loving and protective as well as being utterly in love with you. He worshiped the ground you walked on and even more so now you had found out about the child growing inside you. “Thank you.” You whispered to him as he landed outside the little cottage that lead down to your den. He simply smiled as he placed you down, his clawed hand passing over your stomach but pausing there for just one moment. “Anything.” He whispered to you lovingly. It was the second last sunrise until you were due to sleep but, for the first time in your life, you wanted to sleep earlier. Creeper had said it might be because the baby would be tired and it must be draining. He started to carry you rather than flying because the pain in your back made it difficult to fly. Creeper guided you into the cottage and down into the basement which lead to the den. “Im sorry you haven’t been able to hunt much with me.” You give him an apologetic look but he shakes his head. “I only wish for you to be happy and healthy.” He smiles, taking your hand and pressing a soft kiss to the skin. You couldn’t help but smile. “You have certainly succeeded.” You smile, wrapping your arms around his shoulders as you kiss his lips. You felt his claws grip at your sides, wrapping around you completely as he kissed you back. you felt a shiver run through his body as he suddenly lifted you up to press you against the wall. “Carful. That’s how we got in this situation in the first place.” You giggled, breaking away for air. His eyes rolled as he placed you back down. You turned your head away as you yawned. “Tired, my love?” He breathed, cupping your cheek as he looked at you with a degree of concern. “a little.” You nod, continuing to the den. As you pushed the door open, you were greeted by the familiar soft glow of candles and the smell of home. “Do you wish to sleep earlier?” He follows you, closing the door over and locking it security. “No, its fine.” You shake your head, going to lie on the bed he had moved down here for you. It allowed you to lie down and stretch your wings out. You allowed your wings to unfold from behind you and, as you sat down on the bed, you spread them out. This meant you could lie down. you closed your eyes, wondering what the next sleep would bring, when you felt a hand resting on your stomach. You opened your eyes to see Creeper crouched at your side, his hand running over your stomach so softly and gently. His eyes were fixated on your stomach, and you understood why. The next time he woke, it would be to a baby. A child of his own. Who he could teach and help grow into a creature like its mother and father? You both had so many questions. How quickly does a child grow? Will they want to leave and establish their own den when they grow older? Will they sleep through the first 23 years or will you need to rise with them? As far as you knew, it was near impossible for you to wake during your sleep. But there was so much you didn’t know, and neither did he. “you are worried.” Creeper looked up at you. “Don’t be.” “Easy for you to say.” You smile as you sit up. Your eyes fell to your stomach, your hands instinctively going over his own. “I just, I don’t know what to expect.” “You can expect that I shall stay with you. And whatever happens, I will face it with you.” Creeper spoke with such love in his voice that it made you look up at him. Tears welled in your eyes as you reach out and cup his cheek in your palm. Creeper moved closer and presses a loving kiss to your lips. -------time skip ---------------- You woke to a pain in your stomach. You groaned, wrapping your wins further around yourself as your eyes fluttered open. Another pain shot through you as you grunted and nearly screamed out. Your hands found your stomach and you could feel the baby moving around, but not like before. you felt tired and sore, bad you needed to breath. It was like the wings around you were suffocating you. But as soon as you started to panic, you felt Creepers wings loosen from around you and becoming more like they were doming you rather than wrapped around you. It gave you enough room to move out from within. But as you started to leave, you saw he was still asleep. Fast asleep. You had little time to process as you felt another pain shoot through your body and you gritted your teeth. You knew exactly what was happening. You were going to give birth. You and Creeper had fell asleep on a nest in the corner of the room. It was large enough for you both individually, and was made of soft furnishing that had been gathered over the years to stand the test of time. But now you needed that bed. Opening your eyes, you saw it was nearly nightfall outside, but the soft glow of the sun was still present. Your eyes fell on the bed, the wooden frame still looking sturdy and the mattress comfy. You managed to crawl over to it and pull yourself up, lying on your back with your wings spread out, ready to fold around yourself if there was a threat. After your sleep, you normally couldn’t move for a few hours, but you had to. You looked back to your mate, only to see his wings wrap back around himself as he would have done normally. He still wasn’t awake. You couldn’t help but wonder how early you were. Would it be dangerous? Did this mean something was wrong. Your voice was too horse to call to him and your foggy brain struggled to even think of a coherent sentence. you spread your legs instinctually as you felt your whole body shake and if felt like someone was setting fire to every nerve ending in your body. You couldn’t smell anything, you couldn’t hear anything and your vision was blurring. The only true sense you had now was the pain that was coursing through your body like a lightning bolt. the baby was coming. All you could do was push in your panicked mode. You hoped your body knew what it was doing and that this was normal. ---------------------time skip -------------- When Creeper woke he immediately noticed that he could no longer feel your weight in his arms or on his chest. He didn’t wait to loosen his limps or stretch out his wings properly. he needed to find you. Retracting his wings back behind him, he sat bolt upright in the nest, his eyes darting around the room. He searched for any sign of you until he smelled something… new to the side. He looked to his right and immediately felt a wave of relief wash over him. There you were, your wings wrapped securely around your body. You always had slept longer than him by a few hours or so. But then he saw a slight movement under your wing and you moved, showing you had awoken. He could sense something new, but he couldn’t figure out what. Until you slowly pulled your wings back, stretching, and he saw the bundle that lay across your torso. Your eyes opened lazily and you looked at him with a soft smile. Creeper moved closer, his eyes locked on the bundle. And it moved. his child. He could see it now. With small wings instinctually wrapped around itself, it lay face down on your chest. Due to the thin nature of its new wings, they were thin and he could see the soft breaths it was taking. Still very much a new born baby, despite the fact you had given birth 2 years ago and you both fell back asleep, it let out a gurgle and its wings moved back and it raised its head, looking around curiously. big, blue eyes, its skin was more like your own rather than the greyish blue of his. He could see the start of the slit in its nose was forming, along with the claws around the outside of its face. Never had he seen something so pure and perfect. “Morning.” You whispered, your voice pulling him up to you. “When?” He breathed, reaching out to the child. The baby let out a soft giggle as he stroked its head ever so gently. “I think a few years ago. I woke up in pain and, well, this happened.” You smiled down at the bundle of joy on your chest. You had fallen back asleep with him cuddling into you, seeming to settle the second your wings wrapped around you both. “And you?” he asked, looking up to you. His eyes showed worry for you, but he relaxed when he saw you smile. “I am fine.” You confirm, wrapping your arms fully around your baby as you sat up so you could draw your wings in behind you. The baby watched your wings and you saw its own wings trying to mirror yours. You couldn’t help but chuckle as you press a kiss to the baby’s head. as soon as your wings were closed, you saw Creepers own come out from behind him and they wrapped around you and the baby. You cuddle into his side, carful that the baby had more than enough room to move as Creepers wings engulfed you. His arms wrapped around you both, as he pressed his forehead against your own and closed his eyes. A sign of affection and love. But then something caught your attention. A scent. Sweet, mouth watering and close by. You pulled back with your eyes closed, trying to focus a little more. Your stomach rumbled as you did and you suddenly felt the hunger rake over your body. “Where?” Creeper asked, knowing exactly what you needed. “A mile north.” You tell him, opening your eyes as he stood. You followed, stretching your legs as you held your baby against your chest. The baby was more than a little excited as it bounced up and down. It was almost like it knew what was happening. Like its instincts had kicked in. You followed Creeper to the door of the cottage while your baby looked about in awe at every little thing. “I’ll be right back.” Creeper turned to you, raising his hand to cup your cheek lovingly. “I know.” You smile, turning your head to press a kiss to his palm. With that he took off into the sky. You little child watched its father go in amazement and you felt its wings fluttering as if trying to commit the movement to memory. You couldn’t help but smile and press a kiss to the top of your baby’s head. Whatever was to come next, at least you could all rely on your instincts.

#creeper #jeepers creepers #jeepers creepers x reader #creeper x reader #pregnant reader

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bookcrook · 5 years

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Absolutely Smitten

Dang. I really suck at keeping my word, don’t I? Whelp, for those who care, it’s here now! This is the first of I don’t know how many parts of “Six Foot Seven”, a new series/book thing I’ve been working on lately, requested by @i-cant-reach-im-too-short! The entirety of the series will be based on her real-life love story, as well as a playlist she gave me. First song was Absolutely Smitten by Dodie Clark. Hope you all enjoy! :)

“Teddy, come eat!” I call out from the kitchen, rattling his food around the large metal bowl. I wait a few minutes before yelling out his name again. “Teddy! Teddy Bear! C’mon! I have to leave soon and you need to eat.” Still no response.

And so begins my daily game of “Find the Giant Dog Hiding in my Tiny Apartment and Hope He Didn’t Run Off and Start the Zombie Apocalypse Without Me”. Such a great way to start my day…

I search behind couches and loveseats, inside closets and my bathroom only to find absolutely nothing. “Where, oh where has my Teddy gone, oh where, oh where could he be,” I sing softly under my breath, “In the closet he’s not, with me he’s… Also not, oh where, oh where could he be.” I continue with my non-rhyming song, raising my volume a little as I get closer and closer to my bedroom, the only other place he could be hiding.

When I finally reach the doorway, I hear a playful bark come out from beneath my bed. I lower myself down to my knees, pull up the flashlight on my phone, and put my right cheek against the carpet. And, sure enough, I’m staring into the eyes of my slightly-obnoxious-but-still-very-lovable German Shepard. Who also just so happens to be stuck underneath the bed I just got.

How he got there is beyond me and getting him out is going to be a serious victory on my end. As in, the kind of victory that deserves a pint and a half of double chocolate chip ice cream and a box of Cheez-Its after work. I try coaxing him out, seeing if he can squeeze himself just enough to remove himself from the tight spot. I bribe him with treats and squeaky toys, but he doesn’t move a muscle. So, I move on to what I knew was, ultimately, inevitable and would no doubt break all of my limbs off of my body.

Have you ever seen a 5’2 Asian girl trying to lift up a Queen size metal bed frame (with the mattress on top of it because she had just woken up half an hour ago and was still extremely tired, so she wasn’t smart enough to take it off) at least a foot off the ground completely and utterly by herself? I haven’t, but God damn it must be hilarious to look at. Actually doing it, though? Terrible. Absolutely horrid. The worst thing I’ve ever done in my 22 years of living. I mean, seriously. What is this thing made out of? Steel with a brick-filled mattress? Ridiculousness, I tell you!

Twenty minutes later, Teddy is roaming free around our brand new home while I’m lying on my bedroom floor exhausted and trying to find a will to live, which immediately comes with an alarm going off on my phone. Who would’ve thought I’d be so ecstatic to leave the comfort of my apartment for an entire day of work behind a desk only running on four hours of sleep. I force myself up and attempt to wipe as much dog hair off of my once clean clothes, abandoning hope soon after---there’s just no escaping it.

Collecting my things, I make my way toward the door, glancing quickly at the clock on my stove. Right on time, I think to myself. Waiting for the elevator was maddening. Come on...

I mash the button impatiently, muttering curse words under my breath in frustration. I do the same when the doors finally slide open, revealing a small family of three with a tiny puppy on a leash. The slow background music only fueled my anxiety.

Before the doors are even wide enough to accommodate an entire person, I slip through the tiny gap and race outside. I flatten my hair and my eyes immediately dart to the left, finding exactly what---or, more specifically, who---I was looking for walking toward me.

“Holy shit,” I murmur softly. How is it possible for one person to look so amazing just walking down the street? I soon realize I’m staring like a literal stalker, so before I’m caught, I turn and start walking swiftly in the same direction he’s going.

“Megan!” I hear a familiar, deep voice call from behind me, “Wait up!”

“Not a chance! I’d say you’ve got long enough legs to catch up to me,” I respond, an air of fake confidence in my voice. I slow down only slightly, despite my original statement, and, sure enough, Owen manages to reach me in a few long strides.

“You’re difficult, you know that?” he laughs softly. I pray that no one saw my insides turn into literal jelly. What am I even supposed to do? My legs keep moving, but my mind is such a jumbled mush that it can’t comprehend anything around me. Which shouldn’t be happening. I’m a strong, independent woman---I don’t need him telling me if I’m pretty or not. I don’t.

So, as we walk, I begin concentrating on not concentrating on him. I quickly find that doing so is no use to me and caused me to not hear a single word Owen just spoke.

“You still there, shorty?” he teases, poking the top of my head.

“Hmm? Oh, yeah! Sorry. Just a little out of it, I guess.” Which was true, to be fair---I just decided it would be better to give him only half of the truth, for my heart’s sake. “What’d you say?”

Owen’s shoulder bumps into mine slightly, “I asked if you were eating in the office today. Thought I’d join you, but it looks as though you’re empty-handed.”

I stop in my tracks as he finishes speaking. “Idiot. Idiot, idiot, idiot,” I whisper to myself, hoping he doesn’t hear me. Because my luck is shit today, he does, and he seems to believe I was talking to him.

“Excuse me?” Owen laughs nervously, surprised by my comment.

“No!” I exclaim a little too loudly, “Not you! I was talking to myself. Didn’t realize it until you mentioned it, but I forgot my food at home; it’s been a crazy morning, so I didn’t really think about grabbing to before I left.”

“What happened?”

“Oh, nothing important, really. Just stuff with my dog…” I wanted to add ‘and you’, but it seems a bit… Forward. Creepy. Stalker-ish. Take your pick. “Made some grilled chicken, noodles, and asparagus last night, too. Looks like it’s the vending machine for me today! Yay.”

“I mean, you don’t have to…” Owen looks away slightly as his sentence trails off.

I let out a bitter laugh. “Unless you’re suggesting that I turn back and risk being late just for a bag of mediocre food, I’m afraid I do.”

“Fair point, but no. ‘Tis not what I mean by that, miss,” he taunts, putting on one of the worst fake British accents I’ve ever heard. It’s something he does often. Why? No clue---not even an inkling of an idea, but it makes my heart melt every time.

“Then what do you have in mind?”

“We could always go out to lunch. There’s this cafe-diner-thing a block or two down from the office that serve the best grilled cheese known to man. If you haven’t tried don’t think I won’t drag you there myself,” Owen laughs. I can feel my eyes light up at the prospect of that. “It can be a group thing or something.”

My shoulders deflate just a tiny bit. I knew it wasn’t going to be a date---I’m not that stupid, but I hoped it could at least be just the two of us. It’s okay, I think to myself, taking in a deep breath, It doesn’t matter. We’re just friends. I force a smile before agreeing. “Oh, yeah. Totally! Sounds great. I can see if Laura and Chelsea want to come.”

We’d finally reached our destination when the conversation began and are now parting ways as it ends. “Awesome! See you then?”

“Definitely,” I say softly. Despite my disappointment, I’m able to produce a small---but very genuine---smile.

I’m practically floating as I make my way to my tiny desk and collapse onto my rolling chair. Slumped completely down (in a way that is terrible for my back), I let out a startled screech as a voice, seemingly coming from nowhere, scares me senseless.

“You’re late,” Chelsea teases in a sing-song tone from above me.

“...No I’m not.” I point at the large clock across the room.

“How…” she stumbles over words, “How do you know I didn’t come in early and change the time on all of the clocks because... Pranks?”

“Chels, you’re still wearing your coat.”

“It’s cold.”

“How about the fact that, one, your coffee is still steaming and you refuse to drink the tar that they have here. Two, you don’t wake up any earlier than you absolutely have to because you’re the definition of a night owl. Or, and I’d say this is my most convincing argument, three, you just don’t care enough to do that.” I sit up as I rest my case and begin pulling out my things for the day.

“You’re no fun,” Chelsea pouts, lowering herself behind the cork board wall that separates us.

Ignoring her very hurtful words, I continue the conversation as though nothing happened, “Has Laura come in yet?”

She scoots her chair over to your side as she answers, “I don’t think so. Or if she has I haven’t seen her. Why?”

I let out a groan and drop my head onto my desk, smashing the keys on my laptop. “Great. I needed her to help me make some copies because I have to meet with some clients later today and I have no clue how to work that… Thing.”

Chelsea opens her mouth, prepared to offer help, but I cut her off before she can, “Don’t. I love you, but she’s the only one who can tame the beast. I swear that if anyone looked at it the wrong way it would set the entire building on fire. Especially if it were either of us.”

“That’s fair,” she relinquishes. Suddenly, a tornado in human form tears through the office dropping a pile of things on Laura’s desk and races into a conference room, all in a matter of .04357 milliseconds.

“She’s here,” I chuckle slightly.

Twenty minutes later, Laura races back into the room and all but sprints to her desk. Thinking she might actually be done in there, I try to ask for her help. And, before I’m ever able to finish saying her name, she explains, “Can’t talk right now. Still doing the presentation; just forget some papers.”

Not long after that, Laura is finally free and snatches my papers from my desk, taking them to that dreaded machine and returning with 15 more than I need.

“Sorry about the extras,” she sighs as she drops them in my lap, “There was an error with the copier, but at least you have those if you need them.”

“Thank you!” I exclaim in a hushed voice, “You are a life saver, I swear!”

“Are you just now figuring that out?” Laura laughs.

I stick my tongue out at her before continuing my work.

I later feel a light tap on my shoulder. Turning around, I find Owen standing there, a large stack of papers in his hand. “Hey, what’s up?”

“I was just on my way to steal Anthony’s copier, but I thought I’d let you know that James, Benny, and the others can’t make it to lunch. Any luck with you?”

Before I can even consider speaking, Laura immediately turned the focus of the conversation to Anthony. “Wait. Wait just a second. Anthony’s been hiding a perfectly working copier from us?!”

“Guess so.” Owen gives a small shrug.

“What the hell!” she exclaims angrily.

To avoid the situation from escalating, I direct us back to our original topic. “I completely forgot to ask about lunch. Umm… Chels, Laura, either of you doing anything for lunch? I forgot my food this morning, so we thought it’d be a fun idea to get a little group together to go out.” My friends share a conspiratorial look when I’m finished.

Chelsea’s the first to respond. “I really wish I could, but,” she pauses, “I have to run home and feed Pepper. Planned on just stopping by McDonald’s or something on my way back.”

“Neither can I,” Laura sighs with an ingenuine sadness in her voice, “Thomas wanted to take me out at that new sushi place across town. Sorry. Hope you guys have fun.”

A smile twitching on his lips, Owen turns back to me. “Just the two of us, then.”

“Yep,” I mumble quietly, my face growing warmer by the second.

“See you in a bit?”

“Yep,” I repeat myself. His smile was now a grin as he left. Once he’s gone, I snap my eyes back to the two girls, glaring.

“What the fuck was that about?! First of all, you,” I point at Chelsea’s floating head, “Don’t a cat. Or a dog. Or any kind of pet! As for you, Laura. Don’t think I don’t know that Thomas won’t be home for another week. That’s all you’ve been talking about since he left!”

“It’s a week and three days,” she corrects me.

“Exactly my point!”

“Sorry, but we had to!” Chelsea cuts in, “You’ve had one of Cupid’s little arrows stuck in your ass since you started working here two years ago!”

“Not to mention the fact that this is probably the happiest we’ve seen you since your sister made you move out all because what’s-his-name told her to,” Laura adds.

I sigh, sinking into my chair for the second time today. “I know you guys are just trying to be nice. And, you’re right; I have been. He just makes me feel all kinds of weird inside. It’s like I can’t control anything when I’m around him, but that doesn’t mean I need your help with him.”

Laura scoffs and Chelsea rolls her eyes at my obvious lie. “Okay. Fine, I do. But don’t do it so obviously next time!”

My personal matchmakers lower themselves back down and I spin back to my computer. Just another hour to go…

🔹🔹🔹🔹

Lunch seemed to fly by quickly. As we waited on our food, conversations were had about simple, silly things like our favorite color, or how we drink our coffee. Others were about how work had been going and what movies we’d watched recently.

“Okay...” he pondered as he took a sip of his sweet tea, “What’s your favorite scary movie?” Shocked by the question, I couldn’t come up with an answer, so I gave him the most definite one that I could. Kind of.

“Probably anything but the Chuckie movies,” I laughed.

The moment that sentence left my mouth, he immediately corrected me. “It’s Child’s Play, you know?”

“What?”

“The movies.”

“Whatever it’s called, it scarred me for life, and I want absolutely nothing to do with it.” I crossed my arms and shuddered at the thought of even possibly watching it again. I knew it was a terrible movie, but that didn’t change anything.

The stroll back was uneventful, but peaceful. And, now, as we wait out the last couple minutes before we had to return to our respective desks, Owen and I have found ourselves walking slowly back to mine, trying to make our time together stretch as long as possible.

Suddenly, Owen grabs my arm gently, pulling me to a stop just a few feet short of my destination, and leans in. My breaths shorten and my body goes frigid as he does so.

His lips brush against my ear as he says softly, “Please don’t think I’m weird for doing this, but Laura and Chelsea have been eavesdropping since we were within listening distance. Anyway, I was wondering if you’d maybe like to go out to dinner tonight? Or this weekend? Or just, at any point in time that would conveniently work for you?”

I let out a chuckle---no, a giggle---at his awkwardness, but then I’m immediately hit by butterflies flooding my stomach as I take in his words. Once I finally come to my senses, my head is frantically bobbing up in down in complete and utter agreement.

After we shared out little… Moment, I make my way to my desk. At this point, I’m not even trying to hide the giant grin on my face. Or my blushing cheeks. Or the fact that my heart is thudding in my chest with pure excitement and joy.

Chelsea and Laura don’t bother pretending that they didn’t see what just happened, and they were sure to let me know about that.

“Did you see the way he was looking at you?” Laura gushes, “And that smile?! What’d he say?”

“What are you even talking about? It was nothing,” I roll my eyes at the rambunctious, gossip-hungry pair, but tell them anyway. “He just asked if I wanted to go out for dinner sometime.”

“Nothing?” Chelsea practically yells, “Are you kidding? There’s no way he doesn’t like you!”

I roll my eyes yet again, knowing not to get my hopes up, but I can’t help but wonder. I’d like to believe I’m not completely clueless; it’s obvious he just asked me on a date, but will it actually go anywhere?

The days that followed were spent trying to coordinate Owen and I’s schedules on the way to work, and deciding where we could go. We also found ourselves around each other outside of work more than usual as we waited for the day to come.

One more week… That’s all I’ve gotta do; make it one more week and I’ll know for sure if this will work out.

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dabiapologist · 5 years

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[My Hero Academia Fanfiction]: Fever Dream, Chapter 2

Pairing: Dabihawks, hawksdabi, hotwings, spicywings

Characters: Dabi (My Hero Academia), Hawks (My Hero Academia), Todoroki Enji | Endeavor, Shigaraki Tomura | Shimura Tenko, Usagiyama Rumi | Miruko, Toga Himiko

Rated T

Word Count: 3.4k

Chapter 2/3(?)

Tags: i've always wanted to write a sick fic, Don't Judge Me, Sick Fic, Fluff, bratty dabi is my favorite dabi, chock full of cliched tropes, and im not sorry, tfw you catch feelings for your annoying villain liaison

Summary:

"Endeavor-san? Quick question."

"What is it? I'm busy right now."

"How do you know if you're sick?"

"...excuse me?"

"Like, how do you know if you're running a fever? Do you even get fevers?"

"Why?"

"Uh, um, just curious?"

On the other end, he hears Endeavor sigh in annoyance. "Of all the things, Hawks, Why would you be curious about that?"

"Well," Hawks chews his lip anxiously as he turns to look back over his shoulder, back at the sizzling bundle of blankets on his couch.

Sizzling.

Oh. That's probably not a good sign.

// Chapter 1: In Good Conscience //

Read it on || AO3

Chapter 2: Sick Day

It is way too quiet right now.

That is Hawks’ first conscious thought when he wakes up. The fact that he even managed to squirrel away a few hours of uninterrupted rest is already worrying in and of itself, though he’s not ungrateful for it. It’s been ages since he got a good night’s rest. Or any rest, for that matter.

Hawks’ eyes crack open and he bolts upright in bed, fully awake and immediately on his guard, still wearing his hero costume and even his boots. Though at the moment, he is glad for that, as the double doors that lead out to his balcony are still propped open, allowing the freezing morning air to filter in unencumbered into his bedroom.

He walks over and gently closes them, shivering when one final draft enters through the tiny slit in the door before he brings them together.

And now, with the doors closed tight and the noise of the city traffic below effectively blocked out and silenced, the silence throughout Hawks’ apartment is even more pronounced. And eerie.

Knowing who is sleeping just over in the next room, Hawks wasn’t sure what to expect come morning, but it definitely wasn’t this unnerving quiet.

“He’s probably still out cold,” Hawks jokes to himself, somewhat anxiously. Fuck. Thinking back on it, he did headbutt Dabi kind of hard. And for all of his attitude and apathy and hair-trigger pyromania, Dabi really isn’t all that hardy of a person, physically speaking.

Hawks makes a worried noise as he feels the small but painful bump on his own forehead. Crap. Hope I didn’t give him a concussion.

He quickly sheds his hero costume, still somewhat damp and vaguely weird-smelling from the heavy rains last night and changes into a long sleeved thermal shirt and sweats. He lets out a pleased sound as he feels some warmth immediately start to seep back into his frame.

“I wonder if he’s really still out,” He wonders out loud as he leaves the room, cracking a grin,“I bet I could just lay on him for a few minutes and not be cold anymore.”

He promptly shuts up, however, when he sees that the door to his guest bedroom is cracked open slightly. Last night was a blur, for sure, but Hawks is certain that he did close the door after depositing Dabi’s lifeless husk onto the bed and tossing a bunch of blankets over him. He looks down the hall, to the bathroom. The door is open and the light is off. He’s not there, either.

Hawks turns his attention back to the guest room, listening for any sign of the villain. Nothing.

“Dabi?” He whispers into the thin crack in the door, “You up?”

His voice rises an octave. “You alive?”

No answer.

“Yo!” He calls a bit louder, gently pushing the door open with a finger. “Dabi, are y- uh…”

Nervous quickly turns to annoyed. “...What the fresh fuck…” Hawks scoffs as he takes in the state of the room. The lamp and nightstand are both overturned on the floor, and the glass of water and medicine he had so kindly set out for Dabi are also on the floor, though thankfully at least the medicine is still capped and unopened. One of the fancy carved spires of the headboard has been somehow knocked clean off and is sitting next to his foot. How the hell Dabi even managed to do that, or why, is beyond Hawks.

Also, and most notably, there is a giant burn spot in the middle of his very nice, very expensive guest mattress. Hawks’ eye starts to twitch. That mattress was almost a hundred and twenty-five thousand yen.

But amidst the surprisingly not on fire wreckage that was once his expertly decorated guest room, Dabi himself is nowhere to be found. And for that matter, neither is any of Hawks’ bedding.

Hawks blinks once. Twice.

“Did this motherfucker really just make off with all my blankets?”He asks himself, shaking his head, trying to wrap his brain around the idea, and failing. Unbelievable. “What a dick. This is what I get for trying to be nice. ”

He grumbles loudly, combing his fingers through his hair as he leaves the room. Well, Dabi was never one to show any type of consideration or respect for anyone, let alone any understanding of basic social etiquette. Hawks supposes he really shouldn’t be surprised, in that respect. It’s not like Dabi would suddenly become a considerate person just because he was sick.

But still. Did he really have to run off with all of Hawks’ extra sheets? Where the hell would he even put any of it?

Actually, he takes it back. He’s seen the state of Dabi’s so called apartment building. It’s basically condemned, and barely has power. Yeah, he figures, Dabi probably needs all those extra sheets way more than he does.

Feeling a headache coming on, Hawks decides to wash his hands of the whole situation. Dabi’s gone, so it’s no longer his concern. “Whatever, I tried. I guess it’s not my problem anymore, then.” He mutters to himself.

He stops in the bathroom and goes about his morning routine, pushing all thought of the night before from his mind, instead focusing on what he’s going to busy himself with today. His days off are few and very, very, very far between, by his design mostly, and only really happen when his sidekicks gang up on him and bully him into taking a day off before he burns out.

He knows deep down that they’re right, but fuck. That doesn’t make it any less boring.

With a wide yawn, he leaves the bathroom, scratching under his shirt as he ambles towards the kitchen. “I guess I could just get some takeout, and catch up on that sh-fwwwahh!”

Thankfully, he lives alone, so there is no one around to hear the loud, undignified squawk Hawks lets out when he trips over something on the floor and falls face-first onto the carpeted floor.

God, if his sidekicks could’ve seen that.

Hawks knows he isn’t the most graceful creature in the morning, but he’s not messy either. Wondering just what the hell it was he tripped over, he sits up on his knees and looks back.

A black boot.

A very familiar black boot.

“Uh…”

Hawks rises to his feet, still staring down at it, puzzled. “He left without one of his shoes. Okay.”

Now mulling that over, unsure of whether he’s amused by it or not, Hawks continues on his way to the kitchen.

And it’s not long before he stumbles across the other boot. The other boot, plus Dabi’s overcoat and belt, seem to make a beeline across his carpet, past the kitchen into the living room.

Feeling a distinct heaviness beginning to weigh in his belly, Hawks pads curiously along the fabric trail, following the haphazardly discarded garments out into his living room. There he finds Dabi’s pants, sitting on the steps that lead down to the entertainment room.

Hawks’ eyebrows rise at that.

“He’s not wearing pants…?” Hawks asks aloud, hands on his hips. What the actual fuck is happening right now?

He never took Dabi for that kind of guy, yet here he is, staring down at Dabi’s dingy and ill-fitting pants, lying in a heap on the floor. Curiously, he toes at them, and Dabi’s box of cigarettes slides out of one of the pockets. The burner phone he uses to contact Hawks is already sitting some feet away, face down and probably cracked.

The window shades are all down, casting a somber but peaceful grey over the room, and, Hawks notices, the TV is on but both dimmed to the darkest setting and the volume is very low.

“Huh.”

He walks over and tugs on one of the shades, allowing some sunlight into the room.

“Close it,” A new, albeit familiar voice suddenly groans from somewhere behind him, nearly startling Hawks out of his own skin. Hawks could slap himself. He really needs his morning red bull, he thinks, because this is just shameful. Even with his quirk, he didn’t feel another presence in the room. He either needs an energy drink or he needs to go back to sleep for another twelve hours.

Slowly pulling the shade back down, Hawks chances a glance over his shoulder, looking in the direction of the couch. He already has a feeling he knows what he’s going to find. And sure enough, tucked in the L of the couch, with all of Hawks’ missing bedding piled on top of him in a giant nest of fabric, is Dabi. Although at the moment, the only way Hawks knows that it’s Dabi is by his voice, albeit much lower and more hoarse than normal, and by the familiar shock of black hair poking out from the bottom of the mound. The visible portion of his face is partially burrowed into one of the couch throw pillows. Hawks can just make out one bleary blue eye, glaring at him.

“Close it,” Dabi mumbles again.

“I did.”

“Close it!”

“I di-- It is closed!” Hawks says loudly, pointedly motioning to the closed shade. But Dabi is already groaning exaggeratedly as he rolls over under his blanket pile, facing his back to Hawks and curling more into himself.

Hawks exhales loudly.

Oh, boy.

Briefly taking in the scene, if it were anyone else... it could almost be called cute. Like a little kid staying home from school, Dabi is all bundled up and watching infomercials on TV until the good stuff comes on. All he needs is a bowl of soup and a nice, nerdy set of pajamas.

There is a faint sense of nostalgia in it, too. Hawks used to do the same thing when he was small. Hell, he still does it now, as an adult, on those rare instances where the planets align perfectly and he allows himself to acknowledge that he’s feeling under the weather.

Although to be honest, he’s not exactly sure how he feels about having that in common with Dabi, of all people. They’re more alike than he is comfortable admitting; pushing through whatever is in their path, stubbornly trudging forward until they either overcome it by sheer willpower alone or they are overtaken by it. They’re a lot alike, he discovers more and more everyday, and it irks him.

Still, despite his feelings towards the other man, there is a weird sort of… something, to it, seeing a more vulnerable side of Mr. Big Bad Blue Fire, something that Hawks can’t quite put into words. But it’s intriguing; the man behind the villain, demystified somewhat. Under the scars and the smug attitude and flames, Dabi is still a human being, he supposes.

A human being that is still simpering and whining, even though the fucking shade is down.

Risking Dabi’s temper in this unpredictable state, he walks over and clambers up onto the couch too, perching himself on the back of the couch with his wings draped neatly behind him.

He stares down at Dabi for a beat, shaking his head before saying, “You’re not looking too hot there, cupcake,” as he brings his legs up to his chest, balancing perfectly on the back of the couch.

He waits for a second. And then another, and then another. A full minute passes with no movement.

Hawks frowns.

Oof. No reaction to the ‘cupcake’. At all. Dabi hates nicknames, especially the purposely cutesy and condescending ones Hawks likes to give him when he feels like picking a fight. And right now, he is most definitely picking a fight, if only to get Dabi out of whatever sickness haze he’s in and to start acting more like himself.

Then at least Hawks would feel a little better, knowing it’s not really anything serious.

But Dabi doesn’t even move, let alone do what Hawks was fully hoping he’d do, which was jump up from the couch in a huffy ball of blue fire and expletives, challenging him to call him that again.

That’s not good.

They remain like that for a long while; Dabi lying down, possibly asleep, and Hawks staring down at him while twiddling his thumbs, wondering where the hell he goes from here.

He has a sick villain in his apartment. A sick, very dangerous, very wanted villain. A high-ranking member of the organization in which it is his mission to infiltrate and bring down from the inside.

Hawks cradles his head in hand, unpacking all of that in his mind. Yeah, there is a slight chance that, maybe, he did not think this through quite as much as he should have.

“I’m gonna go make some coffee,” He says out loud, more to himself than to Dabi, who he is sure probably didn’t even hear him. He doesn't even really like coffee, but he just needs something pointless and mechanical to focus on for a few minutes, so he can sort this ordeal out in his head.

This is fine, he thinks as he rips open the package of coffee grounds, this is okay. So far, it doesn’t seem like he’s gonna make a scene or anything. Hopefully, he’ll just lie on the couch all day in a borderline coma, and if he’s conscious by tonight, I can maybe sneak him out. Of course, I'll need to blindfold him or something, so he doesn’t know where I live… fuck. I didn’t even think of that.

Hawks freezes, mid-scoop. How the hell had that not occurred to him before? That bringing Dabi up to his apartment would mean letting the villain know where he lived, giving him and the League an extra advantage over him?

Last night he had been so focused on not leaving Dabi half-dead on the street, that he didn’t think of the consequences his little act of kindness could bring for him in the immediate future. And just now, he had been so focused on finding Dabi that he didn't realize that the other man trashing his guest room and passing out on his couch instead was actually the best possible case scenario he could have hoped for in this situation. The last thing he needs, he realizes in a cold sweat, is Dabi, whose face is extremely recognizable, wandering around his apartment building, deliriously sick and liable to cause all sorts of mayhem.

“Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck fuck,” He chants to himself. But what if he was up at night when I was asleep, checking out the surroundings? He continues setting the coffee maker to boil.

Hawks looks back over his shoulder, out over the island and into the living room, where the top of Dabi’s blanket mound is just barely visible.

Then again, he’s so out of it right now, and was last night, too. I mean, I can’t imagine another reason he’d trash the guest room, other than he woke up and was disoriented and freaked out.

“Nah, he couldn't have. Not in his condition.”

He barely made it to the living room, let alone outside or to the windows. Surveillance is the last thing on his mind, right now. Hawks stares at the coffee as it drip, drip, drips down into the coffee pot, condensation beginning to form on the outside from the heat. It’s weirdly calming.

Hawks sighs to himself.

Well, I guess it’s too late to worry about that now. What’s done is done. For now, I just have to figure out how to work this situation to my advantage.

Hawks ceases his mental calculating when he feels a certain vibration ripple through his smaller feathers, along with the near silent rustle of fabric along the kitchen's tiles behind him. At least this time, Dabi doesn’t surprise him. Although, he has to admit, how Dabi manages to move so quietly even while sick to point of delirium is quite impressive.

“Is it ready yet?” He hears the other man ask over his shoulder.

“You were awake?”

“Mmn. Barely.”

Hawks turns, and almost can’t believe his eyes.

Wow.

Dabi, to be blunt, looks like a straight up corpse that was freshly rolled out of a grave. His eyes are glassy and squinted somewhat, sensitive to the light in the kitchen, and his skin, the parts that aren’t scarred and unhealthy, are so pale he looks almost otherworldly. Save for his nose, which is a little pink around the nostrils. And, just like last night, he still seems unsteady on his feet; there is a noticeable side to side sway as Dabi stands there, eyes unfocused.

Still, Hawks can’t fight the smile that is creeping onto his face. When he first met Dabi, never did he imagine that one day in the near future, that same smug, lying bastard face would be in his kitchen, staring back at him while cocooned in what Hawks is sure is no less than ten different blankets and bed sheets. Currently, the entire bottom half of Dabi’s face is covered, allowing Hawks to only really see him from the nose up.

“Are you cold?”

“Yeah.”

Hawks snorts to himself as he turns back to the coffee pot, shutting it off after it chimes. “I didn’t even think you got cold.”

“When I’m sick, I do.” Dabi says, without much fanfare. Huh. It’s a little unnerving, Dabi giving straight answers, for once. He’s certainly being a lot more forthcoming than last night, that’s for sure.

Ah, the straightforwardness that comes with realization and the cessation of denial.

“Is it ready?” Dabi asks, already reaching for the coffee pot.

“Yeah, it’s rea- Hey! What the fuck are you doing, you lunatic?!”

Hawks quickly but carefully wrestles the still scalding hot coffee pot out of Dabi’s bare hands, managing to catch him just seconds before he upends the open pot over his face and into his mouth.

“I’m cold,” Dabi moans, glaring at him. Hawks glares back in disbelief.

“Okay, can I put the shit in a cup first? God!” Still holding the coffee pot tightly by the handle, Hawks shoves past Dabi to get to the cupboard and pulls out two mugs.

“This ain’t Game of Thrones, you fucking jackass,” Hawks snaps as he pours the coffee out into the mugs, “You're not a dragon. And you don't need anymore third degree burns.”

Dabi mumbles something rude but thankfully unintelligible as he lumbers closer, still keeping a tight grip on the blankets around him.

“What the fuck does that even mean?” He mutters as he bumps Hawks out of his way, “Move. I want coffee.”

He swipes one of the mugs before Hawks can even protest --that was his mug-- and does exactly what he had intended to do before: he chugs the piping hot liquid so fast he upends the mug over his face, eyes rolling shut blissfully. He doesn’t even stop to breathe.

Hawks watches the scene with saucer-wide eyes, and silently accepts the empty mug back when Dabi hands it to him some ten odd seconds later, a sated little grin on his face.

“I… stand corrected…” Hawks says in shock. Did he even feel that? Hawks has so many questions. But right now, he only settles for a few. “You good now?”

“Mm, yeah.”

“Are you still cold?”

“M’no.”

Hawks slowly raises a finger and points over to the couch. “Will you go back to sleep now?”

Dabi follows his finger. “Mm-hm,” He mumbles before he abruptly turns and ambles out of the kitchen. Hawks watches him go, not quite believing how easy of an interaction that was. Dabi and easy are two words that don’t belong in the same sentence. Ever.

He watches him go until he sees Dabi tumble face first down onto the couch. Hawks listens for a few seconds, to the rustle of sheets and blankets and Dabi’s little muttered curses as he makes himself comfortable in his blanket nest again.

When he finally settles down, Hawks lets out a loud exhale, allowing himself to take a sip of his now warm coffee.

He doesn’t like coffee all that much, but still, he already recognizes this as a rare moment of peace; one of the few, if any, he’s going to get today, so he takes advantage of it.

Halfway through the cup, he hears Dabi groaning from the living room and rolls his eyes. Rare, and so very, very brief.

He sets the cup down on the counter loudly.

What now?

That, he realizes as he walks out the living room, is not a question he really wanted an answer to.

#dabihawks #hawksdabi #hotwings #spicywings #bnha fic #fanfiction meme #bnha fanfiction #expect chapter 3 by this time next week most likely!

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