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#so if there will be less posts than usual I'm not dead c:
mo0nlyte · 23 days
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(we are posting a story finally WOOOOO)
(you being their little sister is your perspective, and I'm doing this to appease the demons, sorry I haven't been posting a L O T has been happening)
(G: Nubbins, P: Chop-Top, R: Drayton, and Blue is for bubs <3)
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You and the twins.
It's been a fight. Constantly.
Back and forth.
You wanna strangle them,
They wanna strangle you.
You guys still love each other, it's just.. well to put it in simple terms, you'd bite them if they touched the door handle to your room, but if a victim hurt either of them, the victim's life will be very short lived.
Of course, today is a hot Texas day like normal.
And Nubbins, the dumbass he is, is about to turn this into a 2v1. Sadly Chop-Top isn't siding with his twin.
Y'all are probably working on the front of the house, it's spring, making it look presentable and unsuspecting to the normal passerby.
Nubbins is getting bored, but you guys are nowhere near done.
"W-Why c-ca-can't we just f-f-fuck-fuckin' be d-done..?!"
His twin clocked him on the back of the head.
"Cuz, drayton'll have our asses if we don't finish!"
You snickered. Nubbins has mood swings, but they are getting worse the more he doesn't get to kill. You have no reason to worry, you're part of the family.
And family. Doesn't. Kill each other.
He just angrily yells, like full blown-
"AAAAAAAAAAA-"
You and Chop-Top look over like '??????????'
And he's storming off to the side of the road all mad.
"Get your ass back 'ere!"
His response 👇
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You're just standing there like ":0"
You've never seen Chop-Top run faster.
Ever.
Besides the time he was being chased by Drayton
And Nubbins is just running as fast as he can, funnily enough he was the fast twin.
Just not today, huh?
You watched him get tackled, and then get dragged back. "I-i ain't d-d-doin' t-this shit a-a-anymore!"
"Shut up before I hang you on a meat hook like last week."
Oh.
..OH.
Besides laughing, you remember that. It sure took the meat of their antics this week.. besides Nubbins flippin' his twin off.
Hours later, Drayton comes out to find Chop-Top and you relaxing.
Nubbins less so, sitting all grumpy.
"Ta' hell happened?"
You were about to say something, Nubbins didn't bother. Chop-Top interrupted you,
"Oh nuthin', just had to chase a rabbit down."
"I-i-if you weren't m-my t-t-..twin you'd be dead by n-now."
Drayton is confused.
You're laughed again.
And as you laugh, Nubbins and Chop-Top get into a fight. More psychical than usual, but it ends in Chop-Top carrying his twin over his shoulder.
Bubba was sleeping on the bone couch peacefully after a day of butchering victims.
Very confused what he's seeing as Chop-Top is going upstairs with his twin. Who's screaming and stuttering like an angry Chihuahua.
.. and you dying on the floor by the front door. Just laughing.
Drayton just shakes his head and goes to sit down.
"Jus' go get cleaned up when yer done laughin' like a god damn hyena.."
What a normal day in the Sawyer household.
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iheartchv · 6 months
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Could you do a vampire Ghost x F!Reader but in TMNT Street Punks and with prompts and can you do it a lemon
58. Turtle bedroom 5. “MINE.” 32. “Do you trust me?” 89. Mating season 123. “Don’t hold back.” 79. “Lay back and let me take care of you.” 142. “Bite me.” 74. “Just relax.” 132. “Argue all you want, we both know you belong to me.” and Turning into a vampire
Could you put this request on your Masterlist
Characters mentioned are 18+ THIS WAS WRITTEN BY AN ADULT FOR ADULTS! you've been warned ⚠️ If you are under 18, skip over this post.
Prompts(c) @turtle-babe83
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💜🌌💜🌌💜🌌💜🌌💜
"Come on, Ghost. Why are you ignoring me?" You stood behind the terrapin as he sat in his chair, looking over his weapons. "What did I do to you?"
"...you didn't do anything." He finally sighed and spoke. His voice was strained. He grit his teeth to keep his fangs from retracting.
"Then what?"
He quickly stood up, gripping the edges of the table. The quickness of his movements, and the squeak of his chair, made you jump a little. He then looked over his shoulder, his eyes glowing brighter than usual.
"I'm trying to keep from bending you over this table and take you... and sinking my teeth in your neck while I'm at it... Because you're mine."
Your heart raced, pounded against your chest. Butterflies filled your belly. You stood there in silence as you figured how to react or what to say; you didn't have a friend come up and tell you that they want to rail you everyday...
"I already know what you're thinking. You can try and argue all you want, we both know you belong to me.”
Then...
“Bite me.”
"What?"
"You heard me. Bite me, if it'll help."
“Do you trust me? Do you trust me enough to not harm you?"
You nodded. You trusted him. But... you only hoped that this wouldn't be something you regretted. "Please... I just want to help you."
With sonic speed, Ghost had taken you to his room. You looked back and forth between him and objects in his room with batted breath, anticipation making your body jittery.
“Just relax. It'll hurt less if you aren't so tense..."
Try as you could, you couldn't really 'relax' relax. He noticed and sighed. He tilted your chin up to make you look at him, and then when your eyes met his you felt like you were relaxing in a sleep/dream like state. Holding you to him, and exposing your neck, he slowly moved to the side of your neck where your pulse beat. Then his fangs pricked your skin, and even though your mind felt hazy you could still feel a small pain that then turned into a pleasurable feeling.
'MINE.'
The red copper life blood flowed over his tongue. Your blood tasted so divine, however... The sounds you were making really turned him on. He could feel himself getting aroused. When you were recovered enough... he was going to taste all of you, to have you.
💜🌌💜🌌💜🌌💜🌌💜
You opened your eyes... and saw Ghost hovering over you, his eyes looking predatory and his breathing deep and heavy. Your throat felt... funny, sort of dry. Well, you woke up... which means you weren't dead... you were part of the undead!
"Do you feel alright?"
"Yeah.. I think so."
"Good, because I can't wait any longer."
His hands tore at your clothes and started pawing at your naked body. His tongue, his lips, tasted every inch of you. How he wanted to take his time doing this to you, but he was too turned on. He wanted you NOW!
The moans and squirms that came from you caused him to lean his mouth in the side of your neck, just below your ear, and start to lick and leave small love marks. You tried to sit up. He knew that in the back of your mind you were wanting to protest against this. “Lay back and let me take care of you.”
You layed there, getting lost in the newfound desire that coursed through your veins. This feeling was making you feel like... you were going crazy, insane, with lust. You guessed this is what he was feeling, too...
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Feeling impatient, after getting you somewhat prepared, he took off his clothes and positioned himself between your legs. “Don’t hold back.” he purred as he lowered down to whisper in your ear to tell you how much he wanted you, how badly he needed you and only you. He pushed the head of his cock inside you, and you let out a small cry at his size. He pushed further in before he then pulled back and started moving his hips.
Your brain and your body couldn't comprehend the sensations that danced hotly under your skin. You were numb from all the pleasure. All you could do was moan and ride it out. You screamed and cried out as the orgasm that shook you was so intense it made you curl your toes and grabs fistfuls of the sheets underneath you.
Ghost fell on top of you, taking a lot of his weight off of you. Both of you breathing and sweating like you ran a marathon. When you found your voice, you asked him,"Did... that... help?"
"For the moment. I'm... ready for another round."
You were, too. You had enough stamina... maybe it was time to see how long you could last.
🎀 If you do/don't wanna be tagged let me know please
Tag list:
@turtle-babe83 @tmntspidergirl @leosgirl82 @angelcatlowyn @annaliaandtheturtles @pheradream-15 @cowabunga-doll @bluesakurablossom @darksaphire2002 @foreignbrunette @greenprincess @half-shell-bo @lady-maria-the-wolf225 @moonlightflower21 @narwals14 @nikitaboeve @nittleboo @raphaelsrightarm @southernblossoms @thelostandforgottenangel @white-masked-beauty @roxosupreme @kawaiibunga @captain-kinda-trash @thelaundrybitch @yumefuusen @sivy-chan-blog @artsolarsash @crazedtmnt @raisin-shell @leosgirl82 @egg-on-the-run @ashleighclark98 @dilucsflame33 @tkappi @happymoonangel @allybutton @android-cap-007 @androidships007 @turtallyawesome @doctorelleth @crazysarah-98 @phd-in-fuckery @gingerdraw-blog
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beta-lactam-allergic · 5 months
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I find it stupid that there are arguments within the trans community to the point that we have insults like "truscum" & "tucute" inside the community.
I'm a binary transwoman & I don't get why any other binary transperson would pick on non-binary (NB) or genderfluid people. How is doing that any different from cisgender bigots picking on us? Why would we expect gender identity to be binary when sexuality is a spectrum & when BIOLOGICAL SEX IS ALSO A SPECTRUM. Seriously there are so many intersexed conditions that our binary focused society just ignores or pathologises, it's disgraceful.
I had my surgeries (FFS, trachael shave, breast implants & bottom surgery) because I wanted them but I don't expect all or even most transgender people to have surgeries.
Not everyone wants surgery. Some can fix their dysphoria by social transitioning alone. Others will use hormones without surgery (if AMAB usually also use body & facial hair removal methods like laser or electrolysis). I don't see how only needing this is any less than valid than me needing & getting the surgeries to fix it.
Of those who do want surgery, not everyone wants the full works.
Some AFAB (whether Non-binary, gender fluid or binary trans-male) only want top surgery not bottom surgery as their dysphoria is connected to their breasts. If that's all they want, than I don't see the issue.
Some AMAB (whether NB, gender-fluid or binary trans-woman) only want FFS & a trachael shave. I don't see the issue here either, tucking works perfectly well if the dysphoria isn't connected to having a dick (mine was) & all you need to do is pass. As for breasts, some people win the genetic lottery & grow C cups or D cups on hormones alone. Some are satisfied with breast forms. I was unfortunate enough to not be satisfied with breast forms & to want a B-cup whilst only having an A-cup because my genetics means that I can stuff my face with food & do no exercise without gaining much weight, which means minimal fat to redistribute.
Some people are scared of the risks of surgery. That's fine, bottom surgery is dangerous, so is FFS for that matter. I went into both knowing that, knowing the ways I could either die or be permanently impacted by a failed surgery. The surgeon I had for bottom surgery asked me if I was aware of the risks before agreeing to schedule an operation date. I'm pretty sure that if I didn't know the risks, he would've said no.
Even though my dysphoria was bad enough that I was willing to take the risk, & that risk paid off for me (I'm happy with my results & had no complications), I understand fully why some people just wouldn't take the risk. It doesn't make them less trans, it just means they prioritise decreased physical risk over increased mental comfort in their bodies.
And than many people who want surgery can't afford it. I only could because my parents allowed me to live under their roof rent free whilst I saved up for my surgeries.
To discriminate against those who can't afford it is too discriminate against our most needy, those either born to families too poor to help them or to bigoted families that kicked them out onto the streets for daring to be themselves. For someone who can afford what I got to tell those who can't afford it that they shouldn't have our support is class-based discrimination for its only an accident of birth separating us from them.
The bigots are coming for all of our heads. Gatekeeping & infighting just makes us weaker.
It doesn't matter if you are FTM, MTF, NB or fluid, if you are post-op, pre-op or non-op. It doesn't matter if you are rich or poor. If you are white, black, Asian or MENA. None of this will make the bigots decide to spare you. The bigots want all of us, anyone who isn't cis, cleansed from the Earth the same way Hitler wanted a world without Jews.
The bigots won't stop until we are all dead, either by their hands or by suicide. We need to unite together amongst ourselves & with the cis allies we have or could have (& if you're in the Anglosphere, polls suggest there are more potential allies than there are bigots, even in places where the bigots currently hold the levers of power like the UK & the US South). That's how we weather this storm, that's how we win.
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Heyyyy! I'm about to buckle down for a survival-focused D&D campaign. Now D&D isn't ideal for this but I'm stuck with it for the rest of the year, however I would LOVE to know if you have recs for survival-focused RPGs. Thinking heavy on food/resource management; tracking and foraging mechanics; less about the fighting and more about providing for the group. Any ideas?
THEME: Survival Games.
Hi friend! One genre that really knows how to replicate survival and resource management is Post-Apocalyptic games, which is why you’ll see a heavy emphasis on those kinds of games in this short list.You might also want to look into games in the OSR style, which encourages your players to keep stock of their inventory in the event that an item solves their problems better than combat ever will. 
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Rad Divers, by Oscar C. Tango.
Rad Divers is a game about building a sustainable city in a post apocalyptic world! Featuring a heavy focus on exploration and settlement management, this game is based off of Knave.
So go forth, and dive into the irradiated remains of the world that was!
Rad Divers requires your characters to keep track of multiple resources such as Security, Food, Water, Space, and Meds. Neglecting any one resource threatens to lead to turmoil within your settlement, and your crew must barter, scavenge, and ration their way to success. This is an OSR game, so your characters don’t have a lot of hit points to go around: cleverness will win out over brute force. The pdf layout isn’t anything to write home about, but the ideas within it are certainly worth a read.
Trespasser, Binary Star Games.
The Zone is an area that's been sealed off by a nation or group of nations due to its danger. It's filled with Anomalies, extremely dangerous areas where physical laws like gravity, magnetism, electricity, or chemistry can break down to lethal effect, as well as mutants and things considered impossible. But it also houses Artifacts: small objects that also defy physics, highly sought after by treasure seekers and scientists alike. And at the center is something even greater.
Like many, you have entered the Zone, but not legally. You are collectively known as Trespassers. Some inside are on their own, some in groups, some part of larger factions. But most want one thing: to reach the center and claim what it conceals.
Maybe you'll be the one to get there. Your Trespass begins now. Good luck.
This is a game about approaching the center of a dangerous Zone, uncovering its secrets, and either being defeated by it along the way or, worse, reaching its heart. You can play GM-less or with a GM, solo or with a group. 
Trespasser is designed off of Breathless, a game system that slowly depletes at your resources in the form of whittling away at the size of your dice. You’ll start with a few skills at a d6, d8, and d10, but every time you use them, those skills will be reduced in dice size, until they all reach a d4. If you want to bring those skills back up, you’ll have to “catch your breath”, at which the GM is able to introduce a new obstacle or problem for your characters to deal with.
For more Breathless games, you can check out this collection, created by René-Pier Deshaies (the original author of Breathless.)
24XX Joyrider, by SageDaMage.
Inspired by Lisa: The Painful and Mad Max, this 2400 hack describes a post-apocalyptic world revolving around crazy vehicles and drug addicts wracked by the past. Including Cosmic Highway-esque vehicle rules as well as bartering rules inspired by The Dead are Coming, this TTRPG has everything you need to jump right into a gonzo hellscape such as this one.
Welcome to the Last Generation!
2400 games are usually only a few pages, and this game is no exception. However, the scramble for resources is replicated in the way your items are broken in order to prevent a more imminent physical threat. Your characters will also be responsible for maintaining and upgrading a vehicle, your home out on the wasteland. If you want a game about desperate survival in a world that wants to rip you apart, I recommend Joyrider.
Other games I’ve recommended in the past
Reclaim the Wild, by Eldritch Knight.
Numenera, by Monte Cook Games (specifically including crafting and community rules from Destiny).
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Thinking about new years resolutions. I usually like making a list with the caveat that I'm not beholden to it. I feel like having exact goals and forcing myself to do them often doesn't work, it just sorta makes me feel worse when I can't do them. I'm self aware enough to feel satisfied about doing something I want without making it a hard goal. So anyways here's a more nebulous ramble of stuff I wanna do in this new year. Less I have to do this and more a direction of what I know will make me happy C:
I wanna cut out the dead time in my schedule. Not like the time I need to rest and do nothing or have pointless conversations with friends; I've learned those are kind of necessary to life. It's okay to not do anything when you feel bad, especially when the reason isn't tangible. No I want to cut to the chase when I'm lollygagging on deciding what to do with my free time, I wanna cut out stuff I just do to pass the time; when I'm not shutting down or not feeling it, I want to intentionally be doing the stuff that I know I'll love. I'm old enough that I know my tastes, I know what I'll like and I should just do it.
I wanna actually get through some of the games that have been on my list for a long time, the classic vns, the recommendations from my friends, etc.
I wanna get back to reading manga. It's a medium I've neglected a lot for the latter half of this last decade. And that's a shame because it's a medium that, when I like it, I'm fucking ravenous for. Shit is so easy to consume, I can do it right in bed and stay up for hours because I'm obsessed.
I wanna read at least a little bit more text. Reading books has often been a struggle for me because of attention issues (always losing my place and reading the same paragraph 14 times, not being able to shut out distracting noises so I have to idle until they stop, during the day I'm too antsy to read, and when it's too late or too early reading isn't stimulating enough for me to not drift off to sleep or get distracted). But there's books I want to read, books I know I'll love, books that have been on my shelf for 5+ years that i just haven't gotten to. Mainly I wanna start actually reading the monogatari LNs. I feel like it'll give me a greater appreciation of the series and open me up to parts of the fandom I feel like I've been cut off from forever. I consider it my favorite series so I wanna embrace every part of it.
I wanna watch anime for myself again. I always feel like I'm not watching any anime, even when i do. I've doing that tried-and-true trick of just watching anime with friends every week for like 7 years that I employed to keep myself from wasting away when i was in that post-college, retail job deep depression. But I've fallen out of watching stuff consistently on my own. I do it sometimes, but its usually when its a show i can obsess over a show w/ my online friends together (love you dis and mattie), but when we don't have that I often don't have the motivation. I wanna watch old stuff and new stuff and my friends' fav animes. I'll finish Aria one day and eventually start watching Lain.
I wanna post my feelings more. I feel like this site has enabled me to do that more than twitter (this itself is kind of an exercise in that), I just haven't gotten into the full swing because I've had poor time management and am still getting used to doing it. I want to express myself more to friends (both new and old). I feel like I'm so bad at managing communication with online friends; never reaching out to hang or initiating conversations. I can sometimes get intrusive thoughts born from jealousy or inferiority that make me feel insecure about some of the closest people I've ever known when the root of the issue is often just being bad at reaching out to them when they're usually free. Also, I just wanna play games w/ my friends more, even if I'm bad at it.
This is a new years resolution, but i wanna work out more. Specifically i wanna get back on that lower body routine I was on. In general I just want to boost my ass and thighs (my ass was never that skinny because i played hockey growing up, but there's potential i could be better exploring) and maybe trim my tummy a lil. I'm not actually all that dissatisfied with where I'm at now: soft at rest, but puffing out my chest will just barely give me that slightly buff look (for a guy) where the chest sticks out a lil bit further than the belly. My ideal is to sorta to be able to do both. I'm not too ambitious in going further than that, but I think I can reach that (or at least maintain where I'm at) if I can get on that basic lower body + cardio routine. Plus it'll get me more excited about cosplaying.
I wanna get more fem clothes and be more comfortable dressing fem around actual people. I want stuff that actually looks good together. I want to be confident enough to go outside in it and feel nice even if people are weird about it. I only went out once in a skirt and it was at 3 am walking down my street and back and i was basically just at critical-level-paranoid the whole time despite there being actually nobody else. It's something I've been interested in forever. I wanna be good at coordinating outfits in general; it's always looked fun, but depression, anxiety, and expectations about nerdy guys have always held me back.
I wanna get more fuckin sex toys. This is not in a down-on-myself-way, but, oddly enough, I'm a little ashamed that I'm a guy so late in my 20s that's explored so little of what I actually do to my body to get off. I should be a pro at rearranging my own guts by now. Like I'm confident in saying masturbating is kind of a hobby for me, I would do it even if I didn't have a sex drive that compels it because it's actually just fun for me. So I should treat it like a hobby where I actually learn about how to better please my body (as well as train it).
I wanna bake more. I can make bread now, I wanna be making that shit almost every week. I wanna bake more cookies. Cookies are one of the foods you can actually send through the mail so that means I cook actually send food out to friends and they could eat it. I could be actually making food for people and not be cagey about it! gotta learn what stuff they might actually like. But also for me. It's so satisfying just to be able to make the things you like, to be self-sufficient in that kinda way. I wanna learn how to cook more in general. There's a sense of control and power where you can just make your favorite things.
I wanna actually try writing fiction/fanfiction. Even if it's gunna be bad and cringe. I envy those who can do it even if it's written like a joke or done badly. I'd love to write stories, either about my own characters or just about my favorite ones from media. Specifically this year I've kinda learned about how good fanfiction can really be even when its sloppy or improvisational or the author doesn't feel good about it or all of the above. It's similar to cooking and baking where it feels like a magic power that you can actually learn how to do in this world.
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sleepyxcocoa · 2 years
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OG Katarina Headcanons!
I am back from the dead! After screaming for one week and smiling during the next, I am officially back! Sorry I wasn't updating or anything like that these past 2 weeks, it turned out my extracurricular activities lasted 2 weeks instead of 1.
I didn't have much time to think of new ideas for Bakarina headcanons for the RPG AU, so I'm thinking about posting them sometime later during the weekend. In the meantime, here are some ideas I had about OG Katarina while I was doing extracurricular activities!(In the OG Fortune Lover timeline, not the RPG AU)
Please note that some of these headcanons aren’t there to excuse OG Katarina’s behavior and to make her a saint, they’re made to help me understand her character and make her more human and fleshed out. Some of these were inspired from analyzations made by @dulcito-on-ao3 and @azure-wolf-227.
OG Katairna has extremely low self esteem, so much so that it can rival Bakarina's, because she A) is grasping straws when it comes to affection from her fiance, B) lives in an unhappy household, and C) has to maintain her reputation as she is rumored to only have been engaged because she is a duke, has weak Earth magic, and Prince Geordo only married her out of "guilt" of her being "damaged goods."
OG Katarina met Sienna Nelson 2 years ago in a social event before they attended the Academy of Magic. She respected Sienna for her diligence and intelligence, and instilled the confidence that she wished someone could provide for her. 
OG Katarina was a daddy’s girl through and through. At least, until she meets Keith and thinks that he’s her father’s bastard. She became a mama’s girl after that.
OG Katarina doesn’t have any actual hobbies. Sure, she excels in some lady activities and does them during her free time, but it’s usually done because it makes her mother proud, or for the sake of keeping up with appearances. She doesn’t have any activities she truly enjoys.
One of the reasons why OG Katarina clings onto Geordo is because she is desperate for love. She doesn’t want to end up in a relationship like her parents had, and wants to at least make this right. 
Because she never had an example of what actual couples acted like, she has a very screwed up idea about how love works, to the point that it's toxic.(for instance, possessiveness and clinginess)
OG Katarina and Bakarina are both determined people, however, they use their determination for various reasons and have their own boundaries to never cross. While Bakarina uses hers to survive the world of an otome game without anyone getting hurt, OG Katarina uses hers to survive noble society and get whatever she wants, even if it causes people to get hurt.
OG Katarina is a type of person that is willing to do whatever it takes to reap many benefits, even if it's at someone's expense.(however, it can depend at who)
OG Katarina bullied Maria and Keith because she felt insecure, and that the ones who she felt didn’t deserve to be in power and were a threat to her needed to be put back in their place.(hence why she didn’t bully Sienna, despite said girl having a less powerful noble status)  
OG Katarina is oblivious, similarly to how Bakarina, except in reverse. Rather than thinking that Geordo doesn’t like her, she thinks that Geordo loves her.(but is in a way, in denial) 
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katzkinder · 2 years
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Summer’s over and the cold rain's a comin', which means I'm about to hibernate until spring-- In the meantime, though, have a belated summer farewell in the form of headcanons!
Kuro burns very easily, like. The reflection of the sun off concrete is enough to give him a sunburn. Because of this, Mahiru always makes sure to slather him in sunblock before they leave the house. The brand came recommended by Lily.
Mikuni and Misono are both allergic to the same kind of red food dye, which makes festival food a bit of a minefield at times. Mikuni, however, is an awful little gremlin who will eat whatever and take medicine for it later. Because he hates himself.
Iduna might be able to handle the cold in a way that makes her look inhuman, but summer leaves her dying. She turns into a slug when it gets too hot. Don’t make her do anything, please, just let her suffer.
Mahiru's always active, but especially during the summer time. He loves the extra daylight, but loathes the rainy season for screwing with his laundry schedule. Usually by the time summer break is over, he's gotten himself a nice tan solely from being out so much.
Tsubaki has a summer home in the style of a traditional japanese mansion, which means... No a/c-- It's not uncommon to find some of his subclass trying to catch a nap on the veranda when it's the middle of the day and too muggy to do much else.
Speaking of Team M's summer property, there’s a portion of the garden path lit by lanterns that is affectionately referred to as “the parade route” due to the way the shadows cast at night by their glow always seem to twist and turn so eerily.
Hugh Dislikes Summer. It's hot, it's humid, there's BUGS... Terrible season, in his opinion. Autumn is MUCH more suited for a true vampire. The one thing he enjoys is that the Inn tends to get more business, because it makes Tetsu happy.
Speaking of Tetsu, he's well known in his area for always being available to be a helping hand with booth set up and post festival cleanup. The old folks in his area also rely on him to chase loiterers off.
Ildio is neutral to all seasons, but summer pings his radar solely because there's an abundance of produce. Niccolò is hoping that in the future, he can actually get his Servamp to sit down and take his time to enjoy some of Italy's best fruit and veg.
Licht's the type to wear his favorite sweatshirt year round no matter the weather, so he has to be mindful of heatstroke. He loves to swim, though, and has very fond memories of his childhood in Austria during that season. Yes you WILL find him challenging Lawless to climb trees faster than he can.
Lawless tends to work less part time during the summer seasons because, well. Everyone else that looks the same age as him is ALSO out and about looking for a nice gig. It's just a hobby for him, so he's not too broken up about it, and really, he hates doing service industry when all the tourists are coming in droves. He refuses to work Disney during peak vacation times ever again, thanks.
Everyone and their brother gets knocked dead by Freya keeping her hair up off her neck in a pretty ponytail that swings when she walks. It's very eye catching. Completely opposite her Eve, no matter what she wears, she seems fine? She looks forward to the farmer's markets being laden with summertime goodies.
Jeje sunning himself in Nod's windows isn't out of the norm, but my god this poor man SUFFERS if he spends any amount of time as a human. Humidity+layers=Not A Fun Time
Lily frets over the decreased amount of time for his kids to safely play, but he's also of the opinion that the increase in child friendly activities is worth the trade off. Before the vampire war, Alicein house would take their children out to festivals after dark and employ a buddy system of older subclass or older human children with younger kids or fresh turns in order to make sure everyone made it back by the allotted time, and no one got lost. If anything happens, they've got instructions on what to do and who to find for help.
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its-chickenwing-450 · 2 years
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Hypocrite; Bucky Barnes x GN!Reader (AU)
Request: Yes
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x GN!Reader
Summary: Wrestling with their inner demons, and we see the weight of assassination on their shoulders... and what does their "lover" have to say about it?
Warnings: SEVERE MENTIONS OF; Alcoholism, self-hatred/loathing, toxic displays of anger, PTSD, depression, dissociation. ALSO MENTIONED: Anxiety, Insomnia, Food. (Tell me if I missed any!)
N.B To the anon who requested this, it's honestly not at all what you asked for. It's extremely angsty and there is no fluff at all. I'm not sure if you'll like it,( if you don't message me, I'll definitely rewrite it!) I am posting it though because I'm actually very proud of it!.
ENJOY!!!!!!
Hypocrite;
noun [C]
someone who says they have particular moral beliefs but behaves in a way that shows these are not sincere
I've always hated hypocrites. People who say one thing and do another, people who lie and gaslight like they drink water.
Cowards. Dirty, hateful cowards... And I'm one of them.
I've never claimed innocence. I've never claimed saintship. Hundreds of people, hundreds of thousands of dollars. Countless hours spent plotting, refining and executing clean-cut, untraceable murders. Young, old, sick, healthy. Bullets don't discriminate, why should the asshole firing them be any different?
'Do you see how wretched you are? How filthy your soul is?' The demon that lives in my head purred.
I'd long since acknowledged that it was nothing more than a culmination of my shame, and anger and inner-evil that spoke, but that never mattered much. After all, they came from somewhere right?
A sip of the whiskey in my hand shut it up for a little, but I knew it wouldn't last.
'Expensive habit.' It sang once more, 'good thing you have enough blood money to..'
Another generous sip and the voice died, but I felt the words clang through me.
Blood money.
I knew it, deep down, that I was awful. That there wasn't enough goodness in this world that could drown out my bad. My heart was black, and my soul?
Even blacker.
One more sip and I was hauling myself out of my dirty living room into my slightly less dirty bedroom. The colours on the wall long since losing their pigment, and the few decorations that weren't breakable resided on my dresser. It was a sorry sight, the half-empty bottles of liquor, dirty dishes, broken plates and ceramic.
To be honest, it was hell.. but I knew I deserved it. So, I shut my eyes and waited on my nightmares to plague me. I wondered if it would be the usual mix of screams and the dead faces of my victims, or if my beautiful brain would cook up something even more devious...
Probably.
***
I woke up covered in my sweat, limbs fatigued from the many times I tried to jump out of my own skin. The sound of my heart was deafening. My body was tight and loose and full of pain, I felt my eyes burn and my vision blur. I felt the bile rise into my throat and tasted the searing, acidic flavour.
'Home. You are home. You are in your bed. You are safe. You are no longer in that terrible place. It was a nightmare.'
No, not a nightmare, A terrible memory.
My tears fell, hot and heavy, as I struggled to breathe in. I gulped down air, afraid there wouldn't be enough and tried counting.
In for 3, hold, out for 3. Repeat.
In for 3, hold. Out for three.
Repeat.
'I will not break. I am strong, and smart and deserving and I will not let this end me.'
In for 3, hold. Out for 3, repeat.
Eventually, my stomach settled, and my racing heart calmed itself. 'Good, I told myself. 'That's good.'
I now had two options, go for a run even though the city was still asleep, or join them, and have a nap.
I considered both, all while breathing in counts of three. The breathing calmed me, lulling me into quiet. 'Yes,' my body seemed to sing. 'Sleep, and wake up when the sun is out.'
Yes, I decided. I'll rest, and deal with the day later.
4 hours later, and I was up. The sun was out, and the sky was overcast— my favourite, perfect to read.
Breakfast, at least I managed not to mess up; eggs and toast.
'A fucking iron chef.' I snorted, and my fingers itched to grab the nearest bottle - to drink, or to throw it however would be the problem.
'You got rid of all your liquor, remember?'
Fine, I'd just break— nope, I'd gotten rid of all of those too. Now, all I had were stress balls and fidget toys. A sigh loosed my lips.
Ring. Ring.
"Hello?" I answered the phone without looking at the name on the screen.
"Chipper aren't we this morning Princess?" Tony's dry, sarcastic voice sounded through the speaker.
"What do you want?"
"Cutting right to the chase, so different from usual. You usually babble on for hours."
"What do you want Tony? It's been a rough morning."
"Avengers meeting in half an hour. Be there... on time for once."
"No promises." I pinched the bridge of my nose.
Unsurprisingly, I was late. Though it was nothing unusual, anxiety quietly lapped at me, what if it was something important? Still, all I could do was take my seat on the black leather couch that some unfortunate animal died for.
'It's okay, you're here now.'
"Now that we're all here." A pointed look in my direction, "we can begin."
Admittedly, I zoned out for most of the briefing. It was pretty the same thing anyway, and if it wasn't — which I strongly doubted— then I'd find out when I read my portfolio.
There was a part of me that screamed for a break. I was tired of the killing — even though I wasn't the one doing it— the missions, the role I was expected to play. The constant stream of people looking to me for help, as a symbol of hope. It was fucking exhausting.
I knew that I helped, and made things better but Jesus, the shit was never-ending. Kill- mission today, volunteer tomorrow, therapy on Fridays, hate my guts on the weekends, more work on Monday-
"Everybody got that?"
I struggled to reel myself back in but managed to let out a hum of agreement.
Another lie, but one I was too tired to give much care to.
I walked out with the rest of everyone.
"Hey, you okay?" I wasn't sure who asked, honestly,— I was too close to dissociation— but I gave a tight-lipped smile and answered semi-truthfully, "Trying to be. "
Don't get me wrong, my life wasn't all sucky. I had great friends, both in and outside of the avengers, I had hobbies, and a majority of the time, my work was fulfilling. I even managed to fall in love, though nothing was happening on that front. Bucky made it clear that he wanted no relationship with me.
Why? Couldn't tell you, but it's obvious that my feelings weren't one-sided.
Honestly, all I wanted was a nap. If not for physical fatigue, then to not feel these feelings... I'd deal with those later.
Bucky:
I watched them through that entire meeting. I saw the silent battle they fought. I stared as they walked out, and made haste to catch up.
"Hey," My hand grabbed their arm gently, albeit a bit quick.
They turned, and I felt dread gather in my gut as I looked at them. Their eyes, were dull, and slightly glazed over. They wore their age in their shoulders as if every step weighed them down like a millstone. The sheer, unbridled exhaust that stared back at me was nothing short of frightening. To put it in layman's terms? They were a dead man walking.
I spoke again. "You okay?"
They smiled at me, though it did nothing to ease my concern. "Trying to be."
I believed them, and I knew what they meant, and I loved them for that rare bit of openness. Was it a deliberate vulnerability? Perhaps not... But maybe it was the way I understood, maybe it was how I related. Maybe it was the unextinguishable ache in my chest that made me want to hold them, love them, help them heal... Whatever it was, I hated it.
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For the writer asks! - 5, 8, 14, 19 and 20 💖
ahh, thank you!! ٩(◕‿◕)۶💖
meta asks:
5. What character that you’re writing do you most identify with?
I'm primarily writing for JJK (& a bit of Haikyuu!! too) atm, so I'd have to say Megumi. He's always struck me as a more introverted character than broody or stoic; he's pragmatic but has moments where emotion overrides his logic, cares so much about his few close family/friends, and is developing confidence in himself/his abilities, all of which I can definitely relate to. Also, we both think Yuuji is the epitome of goodness and sunshine, so there's that lol.
8. Is what you like to write the same as what you like to read?
Overall, yeah! Sometimes I get in a mood for some light angst, but not often, which is why the majority of my fic is hurt/comfort and fluff. I also enjoy reading long fic, as well as fantasy AUs (I'm actually a huge sucker for pirate/mermaid AUs!), though I don't really write them myself anymore.
14. At what point in writing do you come up with a title?
Oof, usually at the end right before posting. Very rarely do titles make themselves known to me beforehand or during a fic. I usually just browse through my pretty words tag until I find something that feels right lol. I think plant kisses like seeds and love's only demand is that we fall are the only titles that were 100% known before the fic(s) were written.
19. Is there something you always find yourself repeating in your writing? (favourite verb, something you describe ‘too often’, trope you can’t get enough of?)
For sure! Y'all know I love tropes like first kisses, friends-to-lovers, sharing a bed, and nightmare-induced h/c. I've written a couple of fics using some variant of the phrase "hands out in front of [them] like [they're] placating a wild thing", because the symbolism of earning the trust of a frightened creature in relation to emotionally fragile characters is just *chefs kiss* to me, and I know I use "startled out of [their] reverie" a lot. I give a lot of attention to describing heartbeats and eyes too, I think. (Sometimes I get a little too in my head about it when I realize I'm reusing the same tropes/adjectives/phrasing but I figure that's just my writing style.)
20. Tell us the meta about your writing that you really want to ramble to people about (symbolism you’ve included, character or relationship development that you love, hidden references, callbacks or clues for future scenes?)
Ugh, I wish I could answer this question for LOD because I could probably ramble about that for a while, but since it's not published yet I hope this is okay! I remember writing this section of on purpose, i love him and wondering if anyone would catch on to the double-meaning:
Love is the greatest curse of all, he remembers Gojo saying once, not directed at Megumi but hollow beneath his breath as if he were reminding himself, and although his eyes had been covered Megumi could tell his gaze was far away, focused on some distant memory that he couldn’t begin to imagine. Of all the lessons Gojo’s taught him over the years, this is the one that Megumi understands best.
He fell in love with a dead man, after all. The fact that he manages to return doesn’t make that fact any less true. Still, despite knowing this can only end in tragedy, Megumi chooses Itadori anyway. Grabs on with a white-knuckled grip and refuses to let go no matter the inevitable agony because Megumi’s a sorcerer and sorcerers exist to exorcise curses and Itadori Yuuji the boy deserves to be loved wholly.
Which is that Megumi, as a sorcerer, intends to exorcise the "curse" of love by allowing himself to love Yuuji unconditionally (Idk if that makes sense??). Also, it's a bit of a parallel to SatoSugu's relationship, though ItaFushi's is (hopefully) headed for a better endgame.
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msmarvelwrites · 4 years
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The Winter Soldier - Part 15
Info: A Devastating car crash causes you to lose your memory and start over. The only thing left in the wreckage was the horrific nightmares which plagued your mind. If you knew what today would entail you would have just stayed in bed. But you didn’t and because of that, everything you knew was about to change.
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader
Warnings: swearing, gun violence. 
W/c: 2.9k
A/n: I’m double posting for @kalesrebellion​ because she called me out. So here you go babe. Also, I did an embarassing amount of research trying to come up with the basics for the serum. But I concluded that this is fiction and it doesnt really matter. But if you’re ur a science major and this doesnt make sense please dont come for me lol
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There are moments in your life that define you. Moments you look back on after everything and wonder, if you had listened to your gut, maybe it would be different. This was one of those moments. Bucky’s world shattered around him as Natasha’s words rang through his comm. 
“We’ve been compromised, Buck. I’ve been hit. They got Y/n.” Her voice, broken and solemn. 
No. 
Dammit, NO.
This isn't how this was supposed to happen. This was an easy job. Only a few Hydra agents resided in this compound. The whole thing felt like a dream. One he was completely and utterly unprepared to handle. How could he let this happen. He should have been there. 
“Dammit. What's your location? I'm coming to you.” He shouted. His blood began to boil and he heard your heavy breathing on the other side. You were running. “Y/n, please come in. Please, doll. Where are you?” Bucky hated how broken he sounded. He knew the rest of the team could hear his begging, but he didnt care. He couldn't. He just needed to get to you. 
“You always were a fighter. Right till the bitter end.” A man’s muffled voice came through his comm. He didn't recognize it as anyone he knew, but there was something familiar about it. A distant memory he couldn't quite piece together. Before he could speak, your voice broke though, a small whisper shattering his heart and sending him into a blind rage. 
“Bucky” You breathed, choking on a cough. 
“Y/n. I’m coming to you, doll. Don't worry, I've got you. I’m going to get you out of this. Don't worry, I’m coming.” He pleaded, but was only met with static, and then finally silence. The rest of the team kept quiet, waiting for any kind of sign of life from you. When none came, Nat spoke up. 
“Guys, we gotta get out of here. They've set off a security alert, this place is going to blow in three minutes.” Her voice was now back to its usual tone, but Bucky knew better. She was scared, he could hear it.  “ There’s no sign of her out here. She’s just… gone.” He could hear that she was running now.
“Bucky, we gotta go.” Steve spoke from beside him. Bucky’s head snapped to his friend, eyes wide and body still frozen. 
“We can't leave. Not without her.” He all but begged. 
“You heard Natasha, she’s on her way.” He paused, “Nat, you got the files?” He spoke into his earpiece, motioning Bucky to follow him to the entrance they had come through. 
“Yeah, I have them. Thanks for asking by the way. I’m great, two more bullet holes in my gut, but yeah, files are more important.” She scoffed, causing Steve to roll his eyes.  “I’m headed to the entrance right now.”
“No, I’m not leaving without Y/n!” Bucky tried to pull away from Steve, but he was stronger. A fact he would never admit to the guy, his head was already big enough. 
“She’s not here Buck. They wouldn't blow the compound with her in it.” He persisted.
Sam’s voice interjected, “Jet’s fired up, you guys better get the fuck outta there. We have less than a minute.” 
Bucky and Steve ran through the dark hallways together until they almost slammed into Nat’s small frame. He gasped when she appeared in the hollow moonlight. Her face was contorted in pain, something he was all too familiar with. Guilt.
“I lost her. I’m so sorry, it was my job to-” She broke off into a sob. Bucky wanted to agree. Yell that if she was a better agent- a better person his girl would be coming home with them. But he couldn't... This was on him. He knew it was a bad idea to bring you on the mission. He deserved all the blame. 
“She’s not dead. Not yet anyways. But we will be if we don't get out of here.” Steve yelled over the alarms blaring in the hallway. 
Bucky and Nat both nodded, and followed Steve across the field. Before they could reach the jet, the warehouse behind them rumbled before letting out an earth shattering explosion, sending the two of them flying into the ground. Without hesitation, Bucky grabbed Natasha's hand and pulled her from the ground. He wrapped her arm around his shoulder and all but dragged her body onto the jet. 
“Vision’s been alerted we need medical. He’s been staying at a safe house in Munich. We can be there in thirty minutes.” Steve spoke urgently, rifling through the cabinets of the jet looking for the first aid kit. 
“Seriously guys, it's a flesh wound. I’m- Ah!” Nat screamed in pain as the jet hit a spout of turbulence. 
“Like you were saying.” Wanda smirked, placing her hands carefully on Nats' wound. Her hands glowed a deep red as she tried to relieve the pain. The spy’s face relaxed, but only for a moment before she was back to worried. 
“He’s alive, Buck.” Nat spoke, and when she did, he could hear the fear in her words. 
“Who?” Steve demanded, but Nat’s eyes stayed put on Bucky’s. 
“Tommy. She said his name in the hallway. It was him, Buck. He’s not dead. He’s the one that shot me, the one that took her.” Nat flinched in pain as Wanda's hands fell from her side. 
“That’s not possible.” Bucky shook his head. “Steve found my mission file. I killed him. I remembered it. You just don't walk away from that.” 
“Well, clearly you do.” Nat spoke sarcastically, pointing to the gushing holes in the body. 
“So Tommy’s alive? And he’s Hydra now?” Wanda asked, suddenly realising her hands were not on Nat’s wounds anymore. She placed them back silently apologising. 
“And he’s got Y/n.” Bucky added, his jaw clenched in anger. 
“We’ll get her back.” Steve spoke. He placed a hand on Bucky’s shoulder which he quickly shrugged off, pacing back and forth through the small aircraft. 
“I know we will. And i’m going to finish the fucking job and tear that prick in two.” He seethed, mostly to himself. 
He tried to focus on the task at hand. Desperately brainstorming how to get to you, but his mind was spirling. How could he just leave you? How could he have been so stupid? The sound of his name leaving your lips echoed around him, only fuling his growing rage. 
“All our tactical suits have hidden trackers in the sleeves. We will hear it go off, but until then we wait. They cant have gotten far.” Steve started as the jet began its descent. “We're almost at the safe house. We’ll track her from there. In the morning, we’ll head out.”
“Morning? That's too long. She could be-'' Bucky cut himself off, too broken at the thought to finish that sentence. “I’ll find her myself tonight.” He grumbled. 
“Oh no you don’t. We’re a team, Buck. We do this together. Vision will be able to enable her tracker. But we need to work together. We can't lose anybody else to impulse decisions.” Steve scolded. 
He knew his friend was right but it didn't make it any easier to agree. All Bucky wanted to go but get you back. Keep you safe and never let anyone touch you again. He tried to keep his distance before, he really did, but that was out the window now. There wasn't a chance in hell he was leaving your side after this. As for the man that ripped you from his grasp, oh boy… He tried not to make a habit out of fantasizing murder, mostly as it resulted in the Winter Soldier coming out of the shadows, but if that was the case with Tommy, so be it. Only when Bucky stood in a pile or carnage and gore and blood would he finally feel peace again...
“We're coming up on the safe house. Y'all ready to bail?” Sam's voice tore Bucky out of his thoughts, and thankfully so. He was sure it was leading to a very destructive path. 
“Buck, help us get Nat inside. Wanda and Sam - sweep the area, make sure no one has followed us. I’ll fill Vision in on what's happened and see if he can turn on Y/n’s tracker now.” Steve commanded as he hopped out of the jet. 
“Can you stand?” Bucky asked, dipping down to tuck Nats arm around his shoulder, helping her up. She nodded reluctantly, wincing in pain as she moved. 
The safe house was a small cabin in the middle nowhere. Munich was only a few minutes down the road but the thick coverage of trees that surrounded the cabin made it feel secluded and hard to be spotted from above.  If they weren't followed, no one would ever know they were here. 
Bucky helped Nat inside, letting Steve and Wanda take over once they were through the door. Before he could enter, he stopped, taking a moment to gaze upon the sun rising over the mountains. In a few hours, he’d be with you again. He just had to make it until then, and pray to whatever god would still have him, that you were alive. 
………………………………………………………………………………………………………
“Продолжай копать. Нам надо её найти.” Keep digging. We have to find it. The voice rang in your mind, waking you from the recurring nightmare. Visions of Tommy and that boyish smile that once brought so much happiness.. His voice, the way it used to say your name, now only causing you ache. 
“Wait, rewind there! Вернись. That’s it.” The voice spoke again, echoing around the room. You opened your eyes slowly, taking in your surroundings, but all you were met with was darkness. You could feel movement around you, but the blindfold tied around your eyes masked their faces. 
“I’m positive she told me what was in that serum.” His voice caused your heart to just about leap from your chest. You knew that voice anywhere. 
“You better be right. You're as good as dead to me otherwise.” Another man spoke. 
“No I’m sure. Wait! Right there. Replay that part.” Tommy asserted. 
Suddenly a headache burned through your temples, scorching the inside of your eyes. You screamed in pain as it coarsed though your body until an image appeared in your mind. It replayed over and over, making you dizzy. 
“Whatcha doing?” Tommy cooed, taking a seat on your desk. 
“Just trying to find the right components.” You spoke, not taking your eyes microscope as you examined the petri dish below. 
“Cummon, baby. You've been at this for hours. Come eat something.” You looked up, Tommy stood there with that big goofy smile you loved so much. 
“I’ve almost got it. Just a little longer.” You reassured him, rolling in your chair and picking up another sample and analysing it. 
“What exactly is, it?” he asked, emphasizing the word. 
“If I mix the steroid with-” 
Another shrieking jolt of pain seared through you as the memory disappeared, leaving you trembling. 
“Go back, we almost had it!” Someone yelled from beside you. 
You tried to scream, to beg them to stop, but it was no use. Before you could try again, the same horrible pain erupted through your body, ripping you back to the distant memory. 
“If I mix the steroid with human blood, it does as it's designed.  But taking into account the theory of nuclear transmutation, we can assume given the right element we can use the serum to absorb its surroundings, right?” You spoke, like it was common sense. 
“Sure…” Tommy chuckled. 
“So, strip down the original serum, add radiation to its compound, now it needs the ability to absorb energy… What element do we know has that power?” it wasn't a question, nor did you think Tommy would know the answer so you continued, “Water, and our bodies are basically made of that. So in turn, if we can create the original serum mixed with high levels of radiation, inject the person, granted you're not killed by that high levels of toxicity, we're looking at a new type of Super Soldier. One that could, in theory, mutate around the serum and absorb its surroundings!” You finally finished.
“I have no idea what any of that means… But it sounds cool. Now put the vile down, and eat something.” He laughed, grabbing the sample out of your hands and carefully placing it on the table next to you.
“Thats it!” Someone shouted. “Of course, why didn't we think of this. Call the commander, tell him we found it.” 
You felt your body twist in agony, but soon the memory left, leaving you back in the dark with disembodied voices echoing around you. 
“What do you want me to do with her?” a man asked. 
“I don't care. убить её?” Kill her? You froze at his words. Even if you could move, your hands were tied down to the chair. Gentally you wiggle your fingers, careful not to draw any attention to yourself. Not that you would be able to tell. The ring that Shuri had made you was still there. If you timed in right, and you still had Wanda’s borrowed power, you could use it to untie yourself and hopefully get the fuck out of this hell hole. 
“Kill her?” Tommy choked. “You didn't say anything about killin’ her?” 
“You should be thankful. The girl’s been sharing a bed with the same man who killed you once before. In fact, I’m so pleased with your work developing this memory decoder that I’ll give you the honour.” The man spoke, shuffling around the room. “Here, tell me when you're done having your fun.” A few heavy footsteps later, and you finally heard the door close. The silence was deafening, but eventually, Tommy let out a deep breath and took a step towards you, ripping your blind fold off. 
You squinted as you tried to acclimate your eyes to the lighting of the room. It was small and dark, but a few dim lights hung above you illuminating Tommy's features. Once upon a time you would have described them as strong and rugged. Now they seemed to loom over you, sending a shiver down your spine. 
“Are you okay?” He asked, softer than you expected. You quickly clocked the pistol in his left hand and tried to suppress a scoff. 
“Am I okay?” You gawked at him. “You just dug through my head like a sand pit. No- no I’m not okay you shit head!” You screamed. 
Tommy chuckled, using the gun to scratch the back of his neck. “Touché…” He spoke, pulling up a stool and plopping himself down on it infront of you. “I missed that attitude baby. Really, these past couple years have been hell without you. These guys are really scary, but I told em- I said, my girl will know what to do. And you did, baby. I never doubted you.” His voice was like honey. Thick and sickenly sweet. 
“What are you talking about?! I thought you were dead!? I mourned you, asshole. And you've been alive this whole time, working against me?” You couldn't believe how cavalier he was being about this. Tommy only shrugged, fuling the rage inside you. 
“Nah, it's not like that. I was dead, really I was. But then Hydra came and BOOM I was back. They promised me that they’d keep me safe, as long as I could help em get that serum you were always talkin’ bout. Said they wanted to give it time in your system, make sure it didn't kill ya.” He started, narrowing his eyes slowly, “You grieved me? That's a funny way of putting it. Cause from what I saw in that head of yours, you were pretty chummy with that Soldier.”  
You couldn't stifle the scoff that erupted in your mouth. “You're kidding right? Jesus, Tom. They brainwashed me. And I don't need to explain myself. You're sick, you know that?  How could you do this? Do you have any idea what they're going to use that serum for?” You fired the questions off like explosives into his chest, but he didn't even flinch. 
“I don't really care. They told me if I gave em’ your little recipe, they’d let me go.” He shrugged. 
“And so what? Now you're going to kill me?” 
“No… Maybe. I haven't really decided yet.” He looked down at the pistol like it was the first time he really noticed it was there. Contemplating your death like he was deciding between his morning coffee. 
“I would get going on that if I were you.” You lifted your hands, wiggling your wingers playfully “Really, Tommy, you're not cut out for this line of work.” You spat, jumping from your seat and landing a hard kick to his gut, sending him flying back. The gun ricocheted off the ground and hit the wall, but before he could react, you grabbed it. In one swift move you turned the safety off and placed your finger on the trigger. 
“Cummon baby, let's talk about this.” He raised his hands in surrender. “You wouldn't shoot me.” 
You cocked a brow, “You sound really confident in that statement. Especially for a boy who was debating my death a moment ago.” You argued. 
“Dont take it personally, baby. Anything you can do, I can do better. Remember?” You smirked. 
................................................................................................................................
A/n: Another Cliff hanger? Yes. Do I know how to wrote anything else? No... My bad lol. I hope your enjoyed this one as much as I did writing it! As always, @cutie1365​ is the bomb dot com for editing this for me. Tommy sucks, we both agree. I hope he gets whats coming to him... please leave some love and reblog if you read it! 
@kalesrebellion​
@projectcampbell​
@calwitch​
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pixie88 · 3 years
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Delilah
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Chapter 1 - Alone - Third A&E Series.
A/N: I originally posted this on a side blog but I was having trouble switching between the two and I also didn’t want to start again. As I said there this A&E series is a lot more darker, hitting RL subjects I have been through myself please don’t judge me as you can’t make me feel an worse than I have made myself in the past. The stigma around these subjects are real and so many people don’t speak out about them. Friends and family don’t even know the secrets I will reveal in these chapters as I am ashamed and worry about what they will think. I hope this helps even just one person realise they aren’t alone. I hope you like it 😘
I’m not going to annoy people with re-tags, so I’m not tagging in these first two chapters as most my usual tags have read it.
Find previous chapters HERE under Together - Adam & Ellie.
Word count: 1905
WARNINGS: ⚠️ Angst & adult language.
Pairings: Adam x Ellie.
Enjoy!
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A Year and a half after the last chapter of A&E Together.
"She's beautiful, Ellie! A girl! We have a little girl," she looks over to him feeding their daughter. All the panic and worry was worth it! She thought to herself as she's getting stitched up.
16 week's earlier.
This pregnancy had been harder on her than Charlie's, her morning sickness had carried on until 24 weeks, she was in pain with her hips and back. Adam made her give up work at 32 weeks. She was reluctant, but knew he was right, plus at home, she could do more research on shops for sale in London.
By the time she had hit 36 weeks she had found the perfect shop, they had a cheeky weekend away in London to view the property while Ellie's mum had Charlie for them. Being heavily pregnant they didn't do much sight seeing, but they did spent a lot of time tangled beneath the sheets in the hotel room. This would probably be the last time in a long time they would have time alone, so they wanted to make the most of it. 
When they arrived back home Ellie had to sort out the internal and external work. She had put in an offer and was in the proceeds of owning the new shop being, so close to the end of her pregnancy Adam took over all the dealings of the new shop not wanting his wife stressed. 40 weeks Ellie woke on her due date irritated and fed up with being pregnant their little lady showed no signs of wanting to come out.
That afternoon Ellie was in the bathroom when she thought her water had broken, looking down at the floor, she was expecting to see clear waters but instead she saw crimson red puddles of blood. She calls out to Adam who was downstairs soon rushed up to his panicked wife. Shock grew on his face as he saw what had her so panicky. He quickly regained his composure, trying not to worry his heavily pregnant wife.
Adam quickly called her midwife who told them to head to the hospital after dropping Charlie at Elaine's door. He helped an hysterical Ellie into the car. On the way her contractions started they were very close together so when they arrived, he practically had to bridal carry her out to the car with her bag to the labour ward where they handed him a wheel chair. Once in the delivery suite and after a few puffs of gas and air Ellie start to calm down she was so mellow that she wasn't even bothered when the doctor took a sample of her blood, she usually hated blood tests but the gas and air had worked its magic.
When the doctor came in Ellie was completely out of it. Between contractions, she was drifting, those few seconds between each one felt like heaven "Sorry, did you say your name is Doctor Curry? I bet you had the korma taken out of you at school!" she laughs at her own joke, then apologizes when she realised what she had said "Don't worry, I know it's the gas and air talking believe me, I've had worse. We are just going to listen to baby and see how they are! OK?" She nods.
After 10 minutes whooshing the doctor and midwife didn't look very happy with the result "What's wrong?" She asked him. He had that look all doctor have when they're about to tell you bad news "You baby's heart beat keeps dipping" tears started forming in her eyes "Dipping? What do you mean?" He hands her a tissue "Mrs Barlow, we want to deliver your baby as safely as possible and with the fluctuations of their heart beat you have an hour to deliver this baby, or we will have to take you down to theatre for an emergency c-section" her heart sank "But how am I going to have a baby in less than an hour? She just said I'm only 3 centimetres" She looks up at Adam, he's calm which soothe her.
"Well, we need to first break your waters, hopefully that should speed things along a bit. So, I'm going to leave Charlotte here to do that and I will be back in half an hour to see how you are doing" DR. Curry makes his way for the door. "Ellie, after your next contraction I'm going try and break your waters. So, I need you to tell me when it's over, OK?" Ellie nods the next contraction comes and goes. Charlotte successful breaks her waters "That feels so warm!" Ellie laughs just as the next contraction starts to build.
"Oh my god! I feel like I need to push!" She screams as the contraction takes hold. "Ellie if you need to push, then push, but little pushes!" Scared her body is tricking her, she refuses "I can't! You said I was only 3 centimetres. I'm not ready!" She hisses at Charlotte "Hey Ellie, listen to me if that's what your body wants to do then do it. I will keep an eye if nothing happens we will stop! OK? You need to trust what your body is telling you to do!"
The next contraction build she begins to push... crashing Adam's hand in the process until it fades again "You're doing brilliant, beautiful" Adam kisses her forehead "Anything?" She asks her midwife "Well, I can see the top of baby's head..." She's cut off by the next contractions "There's the head" Charlotte tells her "With the next contraction she'll be here" another starts and Ellie pushes again "And here she is 7:43PM welcome to the world little one!" Charlotte says as she cleans her up.
"Ellie, you did it again! She's here!" Adam cups her face and kisses her lips "Skin to skin?" Charlotte asks, Ellie nods "I'll just get Daddy to cut the cord" she looks over to Adam and hands him the scissors. He proudly cuts through the cord before Charlotte moves her to Ellie's chest "Does she have a name?" Charlotte looks at both of them "We're still haven't decid..." she cuts Adam off "Delilah!" Ellie looks up at Adam as the brightest smile appears on his face "Aww that's lovely! Where did you get that from?" She asks the pair.
"It was my Nan's name" Adam says not quite believing she finally had a name and a name that means something to him. "That's sweet! Ellie do you want to give Delilah to Daddy while we get this afterbirth delivered?" Charlotte places Delilah in a towel passes her to Adam as DR. Curry walks in "How are we do...oh baby is here! Wow how long did that take?" He looks over to Charlotte "15 minutes after I broke her water. She had the urge to push right away!" He looks at her stunned "Whoa! That's amazing have you requested her IV drip yet?"
Ellie looks confused "IV drip?" He looks over to her "We estimated you probably lost just over a pint of blood. This will just stop anymore bleeding" Charlotte smiles at a worried Ellie "Nothing to worry about its just because you've lost more than usually. It's routine"
"I'll go and get what we need. While you finish up in here" DR. Curry says as he leave the room.
Later, Charlotte has shift had ended and a new midwife had taken over "When can I go for a shower?" Ellie asks her new midwife Demi she wanders over checks the IV drip monitor "You have another 45 minutes on this then you should be OK" another midwife walks in and calls Demi out of the room a few minutes later she comes back in "We are going to have to move you up to postnatal ward now" Ellie looked shocked with Charlie's Labour she was allowed to have a shower before heading up.
Her legs were still covered in blood as well as her hospital gown. She got off the bed with her IV drip and into a wheelchair, Adam close behind with Delilah. She gets into her cubicle and take a seat in the chair after the midwife leave, she bursts into tears Adam puts Delilah down in her cot and rushes over to his wife "Hey, what's up beautiful?"
She looks up at him "Everything I'm covered in blood, I'm still in this awful thing. I want get into bed, but I can't sit on there like this! I want to cuddle my baby, but my arms are cover in blood. I feel dirty like I'm a cast member of the walking dead! And from what it sounds like we have a snorer the other side of this stupid curtain" He lifts up his wife's chin "Watch Delilah I'll be back in a minute" he gets up and leaves the cubicle through the curtain.
10 minutes later he comes back with a wheel chair and a midwife "You help her into the chair and grab her bag I'll grab baby" the midwife tells Adam. Wiping her tears she looks up at him "What's going on?" He smiles at her "You'll see now come on!" He lifts her out of her chair and into the wheel chair. They walk down the hall and through a door. Once inside she spots another bed and a bathroom "Adam?"
She looks up at him "This was the last one they had!" She looks at him still confused, he laughs, "£90 a night for a private room with a bath in the bathroom and this lovely lady has said if you've had over 80 percent of that drip she'll take it off you, so you can go for a soak" her eyes well up and she starts to cry again.
"It suppose to make you happy not sad!" He laughs, "Happy tears!" The midwife smiles at them both as she catches sight of Ellie, she shook her head "Oh dear, look at the state of you! They let you come up here like that! You poor thing, let me put her next to the bed and get you off this. Even if I have to put you back on after you can't sit like that!" She puts Delilah next the bed and takes Ellie off the drip before helping her to the bathroom.
20 minutes later all fresh from her shower, she emerges from the bathroom in her own comfortable clothes. Adam is changing Delilahs nappy. He looks up "Feeling better?" She smiles as she nods at him before she gets onto the bed next him. She places a kiss on his cheek, "Thank you!" He looks over to her "Why are you thanking me? You did all the hard work!" He places Delilah back in her cot "You were calm while I was losing it! I crashed your hand and you spent money on a hospital room just to make me happy!"
He laughs, "I did have my own motives! No one, not even me was going to sleep with a motorbike snoring next door!" he pulls her to his chest and pulls over the blanket over the both of them "We better sleep while she does. So, night beautiful!" She kisses his cheek "Night! I love you!" She feels him chuckle "I love you more"
Continue reading this story here - Chapter 2.
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C/TW for financial abuse rant plz scroll past if you don't want to see it
My parents were always strapped for money. By my twenties the house was working off of dad's paycheck and TWO disability pensions (both mine, and mother's) and yet somehow we could still barely afford anything.
The homeloan was refinanced several times, we barely if ever went out to do anything, family holidays just didn't exist 99% of the time. It was always hammered into my head that we never had any money.
I never let myself bring up anything that needed replacing until I absolutely definitely did not have a choice anymore. For years I worked with a zombie laptop, slept on a dead mattress that had springs poking through and digging into my back, and lived on a ruptured metal bedframe that sliced at my leg every time I woke up. But I never said anything because we were broke.
Three quarters of my own disabilty pension went straight to the family funds without me even seeing it. And if I ever asked what it was being used for, I was usually answered in an increasingly aggressive tone. So I stopped asking.
I was often told I was "helping pay" for things that benefitted me in absolutely no way with money that was technically being stolen from me, now that I think about it.
Our poverty didn't stop the house from being riddled with random useless crap, however.
Because, we were poor... Unless it came to something that mother wanted.
Piles upon piles of random fabrics, wool, spindles, sewing threads, ribbons, design books, custom wooden weaving stands, and a whole bunch of other junk that was rarely if ever touched littered the house. Like, literally littered it.
There were entire sections of the house you just could no access because of all the things mother had shoved into them.
We were poor, mother wasn't.
There was so much junk in the house that it bled into my own spaces. I don't think I ever lived in a room that wasn't filled with shit that wasn't mine.
But that's a rant for another post.
Right up until I fled, I had absolutely no control over my own finances. They weren't even going directly to me. They went to mother's account first, and then to me. Even when I started receiving NDIS payments as well.
Everything went to mother's account.
Thankfully when I fled, a decent amount of the money she stole away was transferred back to me.
But I had no control. And every time I tried to coerce some control back, I was essentially bullied into giving it back up again by the time the conversation finished.
I had no say in where my money went, what it was used for, who it went to, or anything like that. I usually wasn't told, anyway.
Mother often cited "juggling" funds around her twenty asinine and redundant bank accounts. I still don't understand why anyone would have more than a main and a long-term save. It doesn't make sense.
And even when she tried to "teach" me about banking, she tried to force me to make my accounts like hers, and casually dropped a story about trying to kill herself in the middle of it. So it was a pointless effort.
In that house, most of my (what i could keep, anyway) money went towards drugs and alcohol, which kept me in just enough of a dissociative state that I could get through the day. It definitely was not good for me though.
When I finally got myself to leave, it was almost debilitating having complete control and access to my own pensions, and I'll admit I went a bit ham on it for a while.
But at least I knew where my money was going and what it was being used for.
Eight months later, I'm still poor as shit. But at least I'm less poor than when I was having all my money stolen from me with aggressive non-answers being given to any questions about it.
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Hi, love!! First of all, I'm discovering wonderful fics I've never read because of people's questions in your Tumblr so... thank you so f****** much!!! Now, do you have a list or would you recommend me some fics where John is a doctor? Can be in Afghanistan, with Sarah, AUs of any time and type... But where John being a doctor is an important part of the fic or the principal one. Thank you, lovely!! By the way, I've been reading your comments about the John hate and I agree with you!! 😘😘
Hi Lovely!
Ahhhhh okay you’re in luck, because I was sorting a list of “sick fics” and one of the categories was “John Takes Care of Sherlock” so I can add those onto these other “doctor John” fics!  I don’t know if I have any where he is strictly a doctor, but let’s see what’s sorted in my bookmarks right now!
DOCTOR / CARETAKER JOHN
Whispers in the Dark by coloured_ink (G, 833 w. || Bed Sharing, Anxious Sherlock, Anxiety, Caring John, Spooning, Little Spoon Sherlock) – Sherlock has anxiety attacks. Good thing John always knows what to do.
Static by Johnnlocked (Krullenbol2602) (G, 917 w. || Fluff, H/C, Doctor John, Headaches, POV Sherlock, Fluff, H.C, Pre-TSo3) – Sherlock suffers from a headache.
The Most Awful Thing by whitchry9 (K+, 1,072 w. || H/C, Holmes Brothers, Seizures) – When Mycroft witnesses Sherlock having a seizure, he is at a complete loss as to what he should do. Thankfully, John is there.
Cuddling by GraciousK (G, 1,107 w. || Fluff and Angst, Cuddling/Snuggling, Fluff, Hypothermia) – When John finally finds Sherlock, he’s hypothermic and delirious. John warms him up the only way Sherlock will allow: body heat. It ends up more angsty than sexy. Part 2 of 30-day OTP Challenge: Johnlock
Bringing Colour to the World by SD_Ryan (G, 1,168w. || Est. Relationship, Sickfic, Fluff, Schmoop) – In which we encounter a sick detective, a snuggle on the couch, and a silly fairytale.
Shut Up and Sleep by Cumberbatch Critter (T, 1,257 w. || Hurt/Comfort, Friendship) – Sherlock has a knack for hurting himself, although not entirely on purpose. John is a doctor, and it’s a good thing he’s there.
Mentality by Cumberbatch Critter (T, 1,350 w. || Friendship, Hurt / Comfort, THoB Fic, Doctor John) – It was weird. But Sherlock was having a panic attack. Re-write of the Hounds of the Baskerville scene. 
Lost Without My Army Doctor by ItsRealForUs (K, 1,499 w. || Hurt/Comfort, Friendship, Migraines, Doctor John, Domestics) – Sherlock’s fighting a losing battle with his migraine when John comes home to help.
The Two of Us Against the World by slashscribe (T, 1,617 w. || Post-TAB, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Drug Addiction, Anxious Sherlock, Angsty Fluff) – John is there to take care of Sherlock as he comes down from his overdose in The Abominable Bride. Set immediately after the tarmac, back in 221B.
Conciliatory Coffee (It’s All Fine) by dget (K+, 1,635 w. || Hurt / Comfort, Friendship, Post-TRF Reunion) – "He can feel John’s shuddering breaths in his own lungs, feel John’s heart beating behind his own sternum.“ Because John Watson is a doctor, and Sherlock Holmes is a detective, and neither really knows how to be anything else. A post-Reichenbach reunion oneshot. Can be read as Johnlock.
The Doctor’s Capable Hands by Totally-Out-Of-It (K+, 2,012 w. || Sherlock Whump, Doctor John, Hurt/Comfort, Hospitals, Anxious Sherlock) – Sherlock is injured during a chase. John sits watchful at his bedside in the hospital and wonders. He wouldn’t leave Sherlock alone like this. Especially not if Sherlock wanted him to stay.
This is Life in Colour by agent iz hyper (K+, 2,038 w. || Hurt/Comfort, Friendship, Sherlock Whump, Doctor John) – John thought with a flash of amusement that only Sherlock Holmes could look like he was about to pass out and still maintain his usual level of acerbic scorn. “You’re a git,” he told him mildly. “And an idiot,” he added as an afterthought, though no less pointedly.  A look into the perks of being both a doctor and a soldier when one is the friend of Sherlock Holmes.
Assurance by belovedmuerto (T, 2,382 w. || Bed-Sharing, Friends to Lovers, Fluff, Idiots in Love) – It’s not so much the ‘you’re half-dead, you wanker,’ or even the broken ribs, the hairline fracture of the pelvis, the dislocated shoulder and knee, and the wrenched ankle.
Intensive Care by aceofhearts61 (T, 2,539 w. || Ace!Sherlock / Straight John Queerplatonic Relationship, Hurt Comfort, Angst, Cuddles and Snuggles, Hugs, Doctor!John, Medical Procedures) – In which John looks after Sherlock directly following the events of “Bless You and Keep You.” Sequel Fic. Part 15 of A Love with No Name
Green Carnation by glenien (T, 2,616 w. || Sherlock’s Mind Palace, Meta-Fic, Angst and Fluff, Communication, Post-TAB) – John takes Sherlock home. Part 1 of It’s No Longer Eighteen Ninety-Five
Someone Else’s Heart by thisprettywren (E, 4,188 w. || First Time, H/C, POV Sherlock, Caretaking John, Pining Idiots) – A crime scene, a rainstorm, and something they both should have known all along.
The Sum of His Parts by CommonNonsense (T, 4,311 w. || Body Worship, First Kiss / Time) – There are eleven major organ systems in the human body. Sherlock knows about all of them to some degree, but none fascinate him as much as the ones that make up John Watson.
Very Good Indeed by StillWaters1 (T, 4,531 w. || Hurt/Comfort, Friendship, Doctor John, John Whump) – John Watson was a doctor, trained to observe details; a fact Sherlock had never been more aware of than when a drugged John’s lifesaving instructions were based on an unlabeled syringe and an unconscious murder suspect’s body.
This Time by Radon65 (T, 4,766 w. || Hurt/Comfort, Friendship) –  He has practically just finished talking to Lestrade when it happens. A sudden dizziness assaults his brain, things tip sideways, and he barely catches himself on the arm of the sofa to slow his descent before he collapses altogether to the floor.
A Case of Identity by PostcardsfromTheoryland (T, 4,978 w. ||  Post-TRF, John on Holiday, Pining Sherlock, Whump, Angst, Reunion) – All John wanted was to get away from London for a few weeks. No people pointing and whispering about Sherlock Holmes when he walked past, no reporters wanting an “exclusive” about the dead detective, just some rest and relaxation in the sunshine. Then again, these holiday trips never seem to go as planned.
Needles by Kryptaria (M, 5,194 w. || Hurt / Comfort, Friendship, Needles, Referenced/Implied Drug Use, Doctor John) – At the end of January, 2010, John and Sherlock move to 221-B Baker Street. By mid-February, John takes up his role not only as Sherlock’s guardian and helper, but also his doctor. As the months pass, they grow closer and the trust between them deepens, until Sherlock puts it to the ultimate test.
I think You Need A Doctor by TheGoodDirector (M, 5,254 w. || Hurt/Comfort, Friendship, Sherlock Whump, Mistaken Couple, Humour, Platonics, Mary is Nice) – John’s not been to Baker Street in four months and returns to find a bleeding Consulting Detective. John can’t help but take care and put up with him. Set after The Sign of Three/Before His Last Vow.
Recovery by thesignsofserbia (T, 5,948 w. || HLV-Fix It / Rewrite, Villain Mary, Pining Sherlock, Major Character Injury, Scars, Self-Hatred, POV Sherlock, Doctor John, Friends to Lovers) – Set after the confrontation with Mary, and Sherlock’s cardiac arrest, John stays at 221B to aid Sherlock’s recovery, forcing them to confront wounds both old and new as they try to heal their damaged relationship.
The Death of Doubt by Gingerhermit (E, 6,584 w. || Alternate Canon, BAMF John, POV Sherlock, Sherlock’s Mind Palace, Hurt/Comfort, Angst/Drama, Meddling Mycroft) – Mycroft asks for John’s help in rescuing Sherlock from his Serbian captors.
Survival Instinct by shirleyholmes (T, 7,162 w. || Post-TRF, First Kiss, Schmoop, Nightmares, Fluff & Angst, Grief, Idiots in Love) – After Sherlock’s “comeback” John starts obsessing with constantly making sure he’s alive (checking his heartbeat etc.)
The doctor is in by PlainJane (E, 7,581 w. || Omegaverse || Sex Therapist, Anal, Hand Jobs, Frottage, Virgin Sherlock) – Sherlock is a young alpha with an aversion to his cycle. John is a gender medicine specialist. Nothing could possibly go wrong… Part 1 of Doctors and detectives
I’m Pretty Sure This Changes Shit by cwb (E, 7,672 w. || Fluff, Cudding, Doctor/Patient, Accidents) – Sherlock finds increasingly ridiculous ways to get John to patch him up after hurting himself.
The T-Shirt Thief by watsonsherlocksuniverse (T, 7,968 w. || Pining Sherlock, Doctor John, First Kiss, Canon Fix-It, Developing Rel., Mutual Pining) – Sherlock steals John’s t-shirt from the laundry. John catches him wearing it one evening, fluff ensues with an endeared yet teasing John?
You’re a Doctor, Fix me by edken (G, 8,342 w. || Fluff / Cuddling) – Sherlock doesn’t do anything halfway, and that includes getting sick. John nurses a very sick flatmate back to health using cuddles, forehead kisses, and a massage. Humor and fluff promised this time, but also some character analysis because who doesn’t love that?
Matters of National Security by mistyzeo (E, 8,465 w. || Jealous Sherlock, First Time, RST, Idiots in Love, Frottage) – John starts dating a male client of Sherlock’s, and Sherlock can’t figure out why he’s so incensed about it.
Incapacitation by Cumberbatch Critter (T, 9,424 w. || Hurt / Comfort, Friendship, Sick Sherlock, Doctor John, Appendicitis) – The doctor had just asked how bad the pain was when the pain spiked. Sherlock’s initial response was a gasp that evolved into a whimper. “Ten,” he gasped. “Ten…”
Someone I Love by hudders-and-hiddles (M, 10,002 w. || Canon Compliant, HLV-Filler Fic, Pre-Slash, Jealous John, PIning Sherlock, Angst & Fluff, UST/URT, Dog Tags) – John gets married and Sherlock finds comfort in wearing John’s identity tags around his wrist.
The Thin Line by Odamaki (M, 10,809 w. || Virgin Sherlock, Awkwardness, Confessions, First Times, Anal) – John swallows. Keeps his eyes on Sherlock. Begs him not to ruin him.Sherlock leans forward over the witness box ever-so slightly, “I was distracted,” he informs the court, “by my partner, John Watson.”
In A Changing Age by allonsys_girl (E, 15,590 w. || Victorian AU, Virgin / Demi Sherlock, First Kiss / Time, Friends to Lovers, Love Confessions, Mild H/C) – Sherlock wakes up in the 19th century, with no idea how he got there.
Partners in Crime by Richefic (T, 16,560 w. || Hurt/Comfort, Friendship, Sick John, Meddling Mycroft, Caring Sherlock, Domestics) – John Watson receives some devastating news which puts a spanner in his medical ambitions. Will Sherlock prove capable of the kind of comfort and reassurance he needs or will their partnership be ended before its even begun? Set between 1.1 and 1.2.
I Will Take Care Of You by SailorChibi (T, 16,664 w. || Hurt/Comfort, Sick Sherlock, BAMF John, BAMF Lestrade, Reunion Fic) – Two years after Sherlock’s death, John comes to find him on the sofa. Wounded and ill, Sherlock is convinced he’s hallucinating and refuses to share any details about Moran or the fact that Mycroft has been compromised. That doesn’t stop John from stepping up and taking care of the last of Moriarty’s web, BAMF-style.
And A Doctor by StillWaters1 (T, 27,393 w. || Friendship, Doctor John, Whump, Soldier / Doctor Dichotomy, Five and One) – It was only when people actually saw John working as a physician that they began to understand: that it wasn’t just about bullets and IEDs and trauma care under fire. That “doctor” actually covered a pretty wide field. And that John was bloody good at covering ground. 5 times Dr. Watson treated others and 1 time he treated himself.
The Midas Touch by flawedamythyst (E, 32,231 w. || Magical Realism, John has a Magical Cock, Dub Con, Healer John) – John Watson has a medical condition that means everyone he sleeps with is instantly healed of all illness and injury. This causes complications when Sherlock breaks his arm, and even more complications when Sherlock falls in love with him. Yes, this is a story where John has a literal magic healing cock. It’s a lot less cracky than you’re probably imagining. Warning: Contains complex issues of sexual consent, although not between Sherlock and John.
The Yellow Poppies by SilentAuror (E, 34,952 w. || H/C, Nightmares, HLV Fix-It, PTSD, Trauma, POV Sherlock, Doctor John) – Sherlock is threatened and assaulted in the hospital immediately after having been shot in the heart, first by Mary, then by Magnussen. As he recovers at Baker Street with John and plans the attack on Appledore with Mycroft, he fights to work through the trauma caused by these two visits. Set during His Last Vow.
Corpus Hominis by mycapeisplaid (E, 47,709 w. || Casefic, Fluff, Romance, Frottage) - John knows the human body intimately. He’s had plenty of opportunity for study as a doctor, soldier, and lover. There’s one particular body, however, he knows very little about. When Sherlock launches himself head-first into a new obsession and they get sent on a case in an unlikely location, the pair discovers each other’s bodies with confusing yet delightful (and sometimes hilarious) results.
Electric Pink Hand Grenade by BeautifulFiction (E, 67,718 w. | First Time, First Kiss, Headaches and Migranes) – If Sherlock’s brain is a hard drive, then these attacks are an electro-magnetic pulse.“ Sherlock Holmes does not do anything by half, not even a migraine. It falls to John to witness one of the greatest minds he has ever known tear itself apart, and he must do his best to help Sherlock pick up the pieces.
The Moonlight and the Frost by CaitlinFairchild (E, 77,289 w. || Case Fic, Post-HLV, Self Harm, Virgin Sherlock, First Time, Oral/Anal/Rimming, Romance, Angst, Mary is Not Nice) – John has to somehow rebuild his life in the wake of Mary’s betrayal and Sherlock’s deceptions.
To Light Another’s Path by BeautifulFiction (E, 128,654 w. || Post-TGG, H/C, Case Fic, First Time/Kiss, Drug Addiction) – Teaching John to observe seems to be a losing battle, but when Sherlock falls ill and submits himself to John’s care, will he realise that there is more to life than the science of deduction? Meanwhile, there is a murder to solve, and John must try and convince Sherlock not to sacrifice his own health for the sake of the case.
The Horse and his Doctor by khorazir (T, 129,003 w. || Horse / Vet AU || Magical Realism, Horses, Vet John, Horse Sherlock, Implied Alcoholism) – Invalided after a run in with a poacher in Siberia, veterinary surgeon John Watson finds it difficult to acclimatise to the mundanity of London life. Things change when a friend invites him along to a local animal shelter and he meets their latest acquisition, a trouble-making Frisian with the strangest eyes and even stranger quirks John has ever encountered in a horse.
MARKED FOR LATER
These fics are just a few I remembered I put into my MFL list recently, and I haven’t read them yet, so read at your own discretion!
A Home for Us by sussexbound (NR, 3,440 w. || Scars, Bedsharing, Grief, Doctor John, Hurt/Comfort, Post-TRF, Implied/Referenced Torture) – He has been on the road for two years, and he is exhausted. He’s almost accepted that he will never see London (John) again—almost. But then there are nights like tonight, where he is weak, and all he can think of is the warmth of the flat they once shared, the crackle of the fire in the hearth, the teasing smile playing at the corner of John’s lips, the boxes of half-eaten Chinese takeaway balanced precariously in their laps. He aches at the memory of it, at the realisation that it is something he may never experience again.
How They Move In Silence by Breath4Soul (M, 3,516+ w., WiP || Doctor John, Doctor/Patient, Voiceless Sherlock, Sick Sherlock, Texting) – Sherlock loses his voice and has to communicate through texts which leads to love confessions.
Recovery by mainegirlwrites (M, 26,935 w. || Injured Sherlock, Disfigured Sherlock, Doctor John, Hurt/Comfort, John Takes Care of Sherlock) – The great Sherlock Holmes is recovering from disfiguring injuries with the help of Dr. John Watson - but can a broken spirit be fixed?
You Go To My Head Series by 7PercentSolution and J_Baillier (E, 257,765+ w. across 8 Stories, WiP || Surgeon AU || Medical Realism, Doctor John / Doctor Sherlock, Friends to Lovers, Pining, Addiction, Angst, Slow Burn, PTSD, Pining, Insecurity) – This series is an alternate universe one, featuring the exciting medical and romantic adventures of doctors Watson (senior neuroanaesthetist) and Holmes (neurosurgeon).
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dangan-happy · 3 years
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Beep boop, I'm stuck in the chicken coop
[TW: Mention of Pet Death]
To anyone, preferably Miu or Mikan because they're comforts.
For the past few days I've been with my dog, he's an old boy and I really love him a lot but lately I've noticed he's been acting a little odd. His balance seems to be off and he trips up when he's just walking around to get comfy in bed with me, he tripped on his way out of his bath, and he tripped a bit when he was walking onto a patio on his way inside. He's been way less energetic all of a sudden too, and he hasn't been eating all of his food either, both really uncharacteristic of him. I'm laying down with him right now, and usually he's asleep at this point but his eyes are wide open. I'm really worried that he's getting at that point of his life, and I really want to stop thinking about it, but I can't. I'm too scared to even sleep because i'm worried that if I wake up, he'll be dead. I've been crying for about an hour now I think. I don't want him to die, I'm really scared, I don't know what to do. Please, just any kind of help would be great right now. If it's alright, I want to ask for a hug. I'm just really emotionally distraught right now.
Well, duh doy, he’s old, course he’s gonna be acting weird! But...I shouldn’t be so mean, sorry anonymous.. The natural reaction when your classmates are complete mushheads.
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Now if ‘ya ask me, this sounds like something the clumsy nurse can answer better than I can but! I’d be willing to give my 2 cents from my golden brains.. So listen here, alright?
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I think the best route to go to would be taking your pup to a vet, see what’s up with him & why he’s acting strange.. They’re the experts when it comes to animals & all, so that would definitely be your best bet right now. I know you don’t want to lose him either babes, but finding out what’s going on ASAP will help you get a step closer to figuring out what you can do to help him..
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Course ‘ya can get a hug, yanno what, I want to request you & your pup.. I’d like to give ‘ya both a hug, I’m wishing you guys the best. Keep me posted, ok?
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I-I-I A-Agree with what Iruma said! Y-Your dog ac-acting wierd c-can be yo-your first indicator that something i-is wrong with your do-dog- If interest is lost in playing games, going fo-for walks, eating, and su-sudden lethargy are good key indicators that so-something is wrong, and your dog i-is trying to tell you in their ow-own way... I-If that makes sense-
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I-I can understand being sc-scared of the idea of you losing your pe-pet... I-It’s really scary for sure, Bu-But even if it happends that you lose them, I’m sure th-they appreciated a-all the good times with you, right? I-I’m sure they al-also would want for you to stay st-strong for them! even without them... Th-Things like this wi-will happend at one point in our li-life... but it’s better to re-remember the good times you had, the mo-moments with them that helped y-you stay strong and be happy, right...?
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Ke-Keep your head up h-high! A-And spend the moments you have left with them, I-I may not be the best at comfort... B-But if a hug can help, I-I’m more than happy to give yo-you one. You both are strong, Okay? Li-Like Iruma said, please ke-keep us posted!...
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LESSON #24 THE CHECKLIST OF THE INCORRECT MAN
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Celebrating the post 80 and the almost senescence of the blog, it is time to review again if they are all paying attention and putting into practice all the wise #yawey councils distributed here.
At this stage of the game, you should have it very clear #colorchocolate what are the things you should look for in a man and what not. Enfantizando the no.
Check this checklist and see how many of these characteristics your new candidate has:
IT IS TERRITORIAL:
You give him a bit the same 80% of the time and the other 20% is grabbing you making you think he does not give the same, but deep down you're as interchangeable as a world-class album figure. It always happens like this: Something happens between you, it disappears, and it seems to make it clear that the thing is not going anywhere untilaaaaaa ....
Until someone else loves you, even better if someone is close to him. There if he comes back and for all. Why? Well, because he loves you.
I lied! By ego.
That's right, look at it as Candy Crush but instead of candy, egos, and you are the chocolate ball at that moment. Points for your ego to prove that you can have it when you want, double "sweet" "divine" points if it rises in positions within the ranking of their friends.
So every time you agree to grab it, throw it away, answer the chats, change plans for him, you're collaborating with him to feel even more winning and level up ... do you want that? EEEEESOOOO QUIEEEERES? # YesI wantNoMentiraI do not wantPerdónameColombiaSoltera.
YOU HAVE A PANIC TO COMMITMENT
All the men in our fabulous and rather deceptive romantic comedies have a quasi-lethal phobia of commitment. But what Hollywood teaches us is that if you behave yourself and you also look like Emma Roberts, the anillophobes will put aside their emotional disorders, and they will make you their foreva and eva.
Well, in real life, the thing is a little more cumbersome and less entertaining. A man who does not want to define things does not do it because:
- You do not convince him, then he is still checking the menu while he has you there on the waiting list.
- You have mommy issues, or daddy issues, or some kind of trauma where life taught you that relationships only bring problems, in which case you will need more than short dresses and sharp comments, to get him out of his mental traps.
- He loves to stay with several legs open tabs: he is a man who enjoys having options, it is more of the emotional buffet than a la carte, and if you like to be the white rice of your life, then go ahead.
IT IS AMBIGUOUS:
If you could describe how it feels for you in a single word it would be:
a) adsñkasldad.
b) I do not understand the question, there is a lack of data.
c) Fish.
If you marked any of the above is because you clearly DO NOT HAVE IDEA. And you have no idea because his behavior seems to indicate that he feels love / hate / disinterestedness / friendship / madness / indifference / laverdadnosleolloolor.
He is an ambiguous, ethereal guy, everything he says sounds gaseous and highly misinterpretable. He is one of those who can throw you a "miss you" and mean 32 things at the same time.
Why do you insist on living in a world where you have to guess what Wednesday is happening all the time ?! Is not it enough for you to live in Peru ?!
Look, you're not a Xmen character, he can not choose to be 20% girlfriend 50% grip 30% friend 10% psychologist 10% entertainment-on-board-while-I'm-in-the-chamba-and-I-do not -a-nobody-with-who-textear. You are a person and you have the right to be one, and declare, to have a man with eggs, to come out of the emotional closet, and define how things are #TechitoModeOn.
IT IS IMMATURE
Sleep with children and you will wake up ...
Children often do not take responsibility for what they do, if the 3 year old breaks the jar, will not come to tell you that you are going to look for an equal or deposit your value, probably try to hide it under the carpet or blame his sister. The little ones do not know well how to deal with certain emotions and they get desperate, that is why sometimes they push the friend, or they get tantrum.
That is why they have mothers who raise them, and turn them into little men capable of taking responsibility for their actions, who know what they want and where they are going, who understand where certain emotions come from and do not intimidate them, on the contrary, they live them maximum.
Well, this one skipped that step and except for not needing a diaper or using a bottle, it's still a baby. One capable of tearing you apart and hiding under the carpet, of forgetting your supposed "friendship" and hurting you, of beginning to babble about the need to do something productive for your life other than beating your own PlayStation record.
IT IS A MAN "OF MANADA"
The friends. THE FRIENDS. Your tribe, your pack. It is a concept that goes beyond being only legs, here there is a theme of who is alpha and who is not, of a man who does not bring a dead animal, not a man. Then there are the sacred dates with the cronies, the mutation that suffers every time you are with them that makes you want to call the Ministry of Culture and say that you have found the remains of the Cromagnon man. And everyone has a bit of macho, a bit of "oe huevón do not be stepped on all day you're behind that skinny" and "do not let any woman tell you what to do" (and usually they are the ones who need to be say WHAT TO DO #SiSabesALoQueMeRefiero
He is the typical individual who feels so pressured by the group, who always walks in the internal battle of being a normal asshole or being a quasisimio # EvolucionasMásLentoQuePikachu
Then it is important to tell you that you do not need to have someone who has so little confidence in himself that he has to try things on other people all the time.
RESULTS
If you did not mark any:
See how you've grown. It seems like yesterday you were hugging the water, cursing the moment you took that third Jäger and left that second message. And now you have a guy next to you, well, I have no idea if it's the right one, but if it's none of the above, it can not be that bad, so we'll consider it a crushing victory.
If you marked one:
The idiot you have on your side is not the worst idiot on the face of the earth, but you should end it / stop checking your last connection time on WhatsApp. It's like the beginning of the flu, right now it's a little annoyance, but you know it's going to be horrible.
You have learned some, but you have clearly skipped a couple of lessons, please start from number 1.
If you marked two:
Your man is almost 50% unacceptable. What does not imply that you can continue wallowing with him for "all those cute things that are in the other almost 50%". The other half are probably also signs that it's not for you, like having an ex that is your "best friend" and telling your fights with him. If you leave it now, it could still happen as a good anecdote for your friends and a reason for drunkenness playing I never.
If you marked three or four:
Have you ever seen one of those movies in which someone is stuck in his car in the middle of the rails and the train just approaches and can not catch the fucking car ?. Okay, that's you and you're about to be crushed by a toxicity machine. Your boy is like those bathrooms that smell terrible but they have put spray to try not to stink so much #ApestanYPeor. You are so close to disaster that if you do not go out now, you will not go out as a sister.
If you marked five:
Congratulations! Somehow you have managed not only to find a asshole, but one multiplied by 5, something like a Great Assassin, a Tera Assassin, a colossal or apotheosistic asshole. It requires a foolish woman, with questionable capacity for reasoning, and a poor vision to achieve it. Poor creature, you must have forgotten what a good man is; flee, run away now and we promise to make us crazy when someone asks us if that is your ex.
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dorianpavus · 7 years
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katieeee you're super good at mercy (seriously, i get hype every time you post a highlight video, i love watching you play) and i was wondering if you had any tips for dying less on her :o i'm a good healer but my e:d ratio is abysmal, and i've started using her pistol more lately, so i just need to. not die as much. rip
omg first of all?? thank you so much omg!!! :’)
so this is gonna get a little long, so i’ll try and organize it so it’s an easier read, ya? below the cut~
step one: constantly fly around
i mean it. most people are not a) good enough, b) playing a mobile enough hero, and c) patient enough to consistently try and tail a mercy that’s flitting around nonstop. you can keep your stream on a teammate that needs the heals and still fly around constantly, as long as your teammates are relatively close by. don’t think you should camp with your tank or dps. mercy’s greatest weapon isn’t her blaster (though being lethal with that is certainly Clutch), it’s her mobility. make sure you’re using it!
how to fly around easier/be more mobile:
you have to keep stock of where your teammates are at all times, for your own safety as theirs. look around constantly, so that someone watching you on death cam might get a little sick. this helps check for enemy flankers (constant vigilance), as well as giving you an understanding of where you can fly to escape at all times. no one wants to end up being a mercy who’s being sizzled by a winston and doesn’t have any idea where their teammates are, cause while you’re looking, you’re Getting Dead. always keep stock of them, so at the first sign of danger, you can be like “lol nice try buddy” and fly away. those seconds that you don’t have to spend looking for an escape route are gonna save your life.
naturally, if you have a pharah or a widow, congrats, they are your escape 9 times outta 10. flying up to characters on platforms is super helpful cause normally, ya know, people can’t get to you while you’re up there so quickly. it takes time, and now that mercy has been buffed, she regens health super fast – faster than most mobile heroes have access to their abilities. if they still come after you after you’ve found a teammate and regained your health… rinse and repeat. they’ll get tired or dead eventually. (see below)
what to do when someone won’t leave you alone
so let’s say you’re flying around constantly, trying to make yourself a hard target to hit by choosing smart and irregular flight patterns. but alas, you have someone tailing you! what should you do?
if your team has a good enough dps:
try and fly to them and attack boost them (and duck around any shelter you can find to keep yourself out of range of bullets, obviously). if they’re good, their attack boost will wipe out whoever is chasing you, as long as they notice you’re being chased and want to help… which is why this is usually easier when you’re either grouped with them or they have Proven Themselves as an honorable and cherished teammate :^)
if you don’t:
tragically, let’s say you’re playing alone, or your dps sucks and is evil and selfish and you’re suddenly in a horror movie where everyone is out to get you… there are things you can do to stay safe!
tracer attacking:
tracers are usually really easy to kill as mercy, as long as you’re good with your blaster – she only has 150 health and 1 recall for every 12 seconds. that’s less health than you, and less than 100 health more than you if you count her recall.
tracers don’t expect mercys to fight back a lot of the time. if you start shooting at her, and knock her down to half health in like a second, she’s gonna use her recall back to full health 90% of the time. then she’s either gonna be like “oh shit this mercy’s not worth it run away” or she’s gonna continue to attack. 
if she does continue to attack, keep flying around your teammates (always fly around, always always always), make her burn her blinks to get you. and keep shooting the entire time. tracer does more damage the closer she is to you, so if you can keep distance between yourself and her and make her lose that recall, you can kill her ez.
genji attacking:
most genjis aren’t very good with their weapon, because it’s hard to aim with it. well, i suck at genji, and i think so at least. you’ll find that a lot of the time they’re trying to come after you, they’re running at you in a straight line – because they don’t think you’re gonna fight back, either, and it’s easier for them to aim that way. perfect. unload a few shots into that cute lil face of his and genji will be dead very quickly – his coming at you straightforwardly makes headshots easy.
but let’s say this genji is actually pretty mobile – double jumping, that sort of thing. just keep shooting – honestly, your blaster is easier to use than his weapons. unless the genji is really good, you’re gonna out-shoot him, especially if you’re making yourself a hard target to hit, too. try and stay around corners and everything, find shelter so he can’t dash through you.
and always be ready to pull your finger off the trigger in an instant if he starts deflecting. no one wants to die to their own bullet.
winston attacking:
a tank?!? a tank???? god. i know. tracer and genji are so slight, but winston’s packing 400 health and armor?! honestly, you’re not gonna win a 1v1 fight with winston. you’re not, most of the time, unless he’s already taken some hits or he’s really bad. 
you need to draw this out as long as possible – keep as much distance between you and winston as you can. fly to a teammate, ideally a dps. when winston starts to leap after you, the teammate is now caught in winston’s sizzle. they’re gonna fight for their own life, and you should start blasting away at winston, too. the two of you together should be able to take him down – but if you find yourself about to die, fly away again. winston will either remain preoccupied with the dps or he’ll come after you – but hopefully you’ll have followed the advice from above and regained some health points first. then fly back to the dps, heal them up a bit, and repeat. winstons don’t usually have a pocket mercy, so he probably hasn’t healed much in the 10 seconds this has all transpired in. you can take him down now. 
d. va attacking
your strategy for d. va is much the same as it is for winston -- you’re not gonna be able to take on a full-health d. va usually, so fly around and get help. even if your teammates aren’t the type to protect their mercy, if you bring the d. va to them, they’re gonna have to fight for their own sake. :^)
try NOT to find cover inside a building with d. va, though. she’ll just corner you in a room (winston’s jump doesn’t really work for that, but d. va’s boost does) and make it impossible for you to fly away to a teammate. since you always want to fly, and you can’t kill her on your own... that’s pretty much instant death.
sombra attacking 
honestly, sombras are a lot like tracer. they don’t have too much health, and when they take a hit, they usually use their translocater to fall back to a health pack. that’s usually enough time for you to regain health and reposition yourself better. 
sombra’s biggest strength is hacking you, of course. so the second you hear that sound, you start firing your pistol -- she can’t hack you if she’s taking damage. DO NOT try and fly away when that’s happening, because she’ll just hack you, you’ll lose your mobility, and then you’re stuck in a 1v1 shootout. you could still win that if you have good aim, of course, but you never want to put yourself in that position.
pharah attacking
it’s hard to shoot a pharah out of the air with mercy’s pistol, so don’t bother. fly to your long-range dps so they get hit with her rocket too, and now you have someone who wants to kill pharah. try and alternate between healing them and attack boosting them (hopefully around some kind of cover to shield yourself) to help them wipe her out.
if she’s super committed to killing you, though, and still dogging after you hard... keep trying to make yourself hard to hit, and try and make sure your dps is doing their job. you’re really not going to be able to kill her on your own, unless she falls down to the ground. if she does, and she’s already taken some hits, finish her off -- otherwise, unless you know you have really good aim and can land some headshots, keep flying. pharah’s rockets do too much damage for you to be particularly effective against her.
no one’s really coming after you, but you still end up dying
maybe a soldier is firing into the crowd and he just keeps hitting you, or maybe you’re getting sniped, or roadhog keeps hooking you. what can you do about that?
avoid line of sight
most of those kinds of problems where mercy ends up dead is that you’re making yourself too accessible. maybe you’re not flying around enough, or you’re not taking cover enough. mercy should usually be doing one of those two things -- flying, or behind some sort of cover, whether it’s around a corner while your teammates fight on the payload, or just far back enough that no one’s bothering you (while you keep a constant eye out for flankers).
if a roadhog keeps hooking you, just keep tabs on him. make sure you stay far back and behind shelter. he can’t hook you through a wall (not anymore, anyway. take that asshole). if he’s hooking you, it’s because honestly, you left yourself too out in the open, too vulnerable, and didn’t put anything between yourself and him (even if that’s just a teammate).
if widow is sniping you, it’s the same thing -- you’ve left yourself too vulnerable. widows are usually super stationary, so as long as you keep tabs on where she’s set up, you can not step out into the place that she has an angle on -- and if you must cross it, try and fly past it, so you don’t fly slowly into her Zone but quickly across it. just.. be generally careful when you fly if the other team has a good widow. you still need to remain mobile, but always try and walk along walls and stay out of her scope.
if someone is just shooting you, same thing. take cover, either behind a tank or a wall (preferably both). and once they start shooting something else and your health is regenerating, get back to flying a lot.
avoiding ults
a fundamental part of playing mercy is avoiding getting caught in people’s ults -- if you’re caught, you can’t heal or rez, and it’s a tpk. ALWAYS take note of who you’re playing against, and if the other team is good, play defensively so that you don’t get caught in things. 
if you notice it’s been a little while since zarya ulted, stay far behind your team. if it’s about time for a death blossom, constantly scan around for a flanking or teleporting reaper (you can, you know, shoot the red smoke while he’s teleporting, and that will hurt him and make him super super super easy to kill). if reinhardt has been on fire the whole game, try and stay behind a wall and/or out of alignment with the rest of your team, so that if he sees the three of them grouped up all ripe for the picking, you don’t get caught. if you’re coming from spawn and the fight is brutal, don’t fly up to your teammates --- walk up. they might get hurt more, one might even die since it took you longer to get there, but then you won’t have flown into a massacre.
basically, just never stop thinking about the other team ulting and how that can affect you and how you can avoid it. never. :^)
well... that’s all i got for right now, haha. if you actually read this i’ll be amazed. :P but also if you have any questions, let me know!!! i probably forgot something useful.
but seriously, thanks for asking in the first place. it’s very flattering :’)
good luck with mercy friend!!!
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