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monzamash · 1 year

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itch — charles leclerc

charles leclerc x you (femreader) | 2.9k summary – spotting charles' weight session in your home gym. that's it. warnings – 18+ (sex, course language) a//n – had to re-upload because the tags glitched out but here's the second fic in the #monzamash special x

The soft, distant thrum of music playing was the only sound travelling through your otherwise peaceful home. You had set yourself up for a quiet afternoon with a glass of iced tea, catching up on work that you’d missed while travelling to a couple of races, watching your boyfriend do his thing. Charles always gave you the VIP treatment, making sure your time away from your life was worth it and of course it was. But nothing could beat the summer break at home in Monaco, with him by your side for a change.

Just as you settled into the couch, an almost finished lemon popsicle in hand and your laptop steadied on your lap, you heard your name being called from the other end of the house. The voice echoing through the hallway belonged to Charles and there was a part of you that wanted to pretend like you hadn't heard him, feeling way too comfy and in the zone to get up again if it wasn’t important.

That was until you heard your name again, a little louder this time and you knew that you couldn’t ignore him. Your man was persistent and even though you loved your time with him during the break and over the off-season, it did become apparent that when he was home, he always wanted you close by to talk to. Like he was trying to make up for lost time but he forgot that even though he had time off, your work life continued much to your dismay.

But you were both working on finding the right balance.

"Where are you?" You shouted back and pulled yourself out of your spot on the couch, on a mission to track down your needy but ridiculously cute boyfriend.

You followed the music, figuring that he must’ve been in the home gym he’d set up a couple of winters ago. The new Coldplay album was playing on the sound system, echoing off the mirrors that lined the otherwise blank walls. It was a messy sight as you walked in – yoga mats that you’d left behind sprawled out on the ground while Charles sat hunched over, scrolling on his phone with his legs hanging over each side of the bench press that was sitting in the middle of the naturally lit room.

He was quick to notice your presence in the door way and chucked his phone onto one of the many towels neatly folded up on the shelf behind him, "Could you spot me, please? Because I nearly killed myself with this weight."

You swear you were listening but you couldn’t help but take a second to drink in his appearance, suddenly feeling a hot flush wash over your chest. He was sans shirt and glistening with sweat, which would’ve been enough to fuel your desires but the tight short shorts and the hair sticking to his forehead was what really got the endorphins running. And as much as you could’ve stared at him for the rest of your days, the last thing you wanted was for Charles to notice how flustered you were by his appearance.

"If that thing is going to fall on your face, there's no way my twig arms are going to stop it," You scoffed, eyeing at the weights behind his head with concern.

"You just have to push it off me so it doesn't crush my chest," He shrugged with a small smirk tugging at the corners of his lips, far too nonchalantly for your liking.

"Oh right – just casually save my boyfriend from being crushed to death. Cool…" You sarcastically retorted while Charles wiped his hands on his shorts and scooted underneath the bar, back squeaking as it stuck to the faux leather.

"Just come and stand behind my head, baby," He sweetly directed and you sighed softly, knowing that he was going to keep lifting the stupid thing anyway and you would much rather be there if anything did happen.

So you shuffled around to where he’d settled himself on the bench, feet and shoulders with the part, ready to save the day if you needed to. Well, kind of ready because the view from where you were standing was not only magnificent but wildly distracting.

“Atta girl.”

Charles’ strong hands gripped the bar and lifted it carefully off the stand, flickering his eyes to each side and making sure they were securely off before bringing it down towards his tensed chest. The grunts that left his throat as the muscles and veins in his arms bulged under his taut skin sounded exactly like the noises he was breathing in your ear last night as he fucked you into the next dimension, the sound immediately transporting you back to the way his hands felt on your supple skin.

His tight chest puffed out in time with his sharp hips that bucked off the bench with each rep and the groans leaving his lips were making it difficult to keep an eye on the job, even though a part of you wondered whether this was all a ploy to get you in here and see this glorified soft core in session. Knowing Charles, it was almost definitely the latter.

"Okay two more," He huffed out, lifting the bar up and down a couple more times, concentration stitched into his sticky forehead.

The grunts got louder the closer he was to finishing the set, again casting your mind back to your night between the sheets, before he slowly pushed it up towards the stand and let your fingers hook around the bar, just in case it slipped out of his slick hands. Because every part of his body was perspiring – his biceps, thighs, neck, chest, the bridge of his nose that was achingly close to your core was glistening and so were you, from doing absolutely nothing. Dripping.

Charles sat up with a groan and took a couple of deep breaths, blood pumping through his veins as you watched the muscles on his rippling back contract, “You’re soaked – let me grab you a towel.”

This was your chance to try and shake the daze you were in. It was pathetic the way he wound you up without even knowing, hypnotising you with something as innocent as a workout. Maybe it was because you had been blissfully enjoying each other’s touch the second he dropped his luggage in the doorway, jumping into bed and hardly leaving it ever since.

Or because he was the sexiest creature you’d ever seen and seeing him gleaming with sweat and groaning like an animal was a massive turn on for you. Either way you were soaking after his performance, desperate to have those sounds breathing down your neck as soon as humanely possible.

He graciously took the towel you were offering with a wicked smile, wiping his flushed face and roughly drying his hair before spinning around 90 degrees on the bench, gazing up at you with the same smile but now with that devious sparkle in his eye that always had you hook, line and sinker.

"Merci."

It rolled off his tongue too perfectly and you couldn’t control the eye roll, knowing how much he loved teasing you in French. He also loved how quickly he could get you naked when he spoke in his native tongue, the mischievous smirk and his Monegasque charm leaving you spellbound.

"Any time," You sang in reply, attempting to leave the room before you combusted on sight but you were stopped by a fistful of fingers grasping the hem of your black cotton shorts.

Charles gently pulled you back, a hole already burnt into the material from his eyes zeroing in on your curves. He loved every inch of you, worshipped the air you breathed and pinched himself daily that you’d stuck around with his crazy stupid schedule and maniacal whims. God, he adored you and ached at how effortlessly beautiful you looked in your matching crop top and shorts, waltzing around the home you had built together.

And he couldn’t hide the way he felt when you looked around, bottom lip clamped loosely between his front teeth, chewing the inside of his cheek and admiring how fucking lucky he was to have such a beautiful creature in his grasp. Heaven sent.

"You look very cute today."

He was smitten; holding your hips in place as you slung your arms around his shoulders. His hands subconsciously trailed down to the back of your thighs and teased the thin hem on your shorts, fingertips melting into the skin like butter as he watched your gorgeously bright eyes narrow.

"I'm not wearing a bra just for you," You flirted, nudging closer to his chest and needing more than just the heat from his hands on your skin.

"I can see that," He hummed matter-of-factly as he gazed over the sheer top that had been driving him crazy all day, adoring the way your nipples hardened at his stare before pressing a peck to the bottom of your sternum.

Charles continued trailing soft kisses across your stomach as you brought your hands to his tousled brown hair, trawling your fingertips through the damp locks and massaging his scalp. A soft, barely audible whimper slipped from his lips as he tilted his head back and caught your eyes, succumbing to the drowsiness and closing them for a quiet moment.

"That feels so nice."

He practically whispered before opening his eyes and pulling you closer with his hands that were now hidden under your loose top, fingertips following the arch of your spine as you leaned down and captured his soft lips. He tasted salty, tongue deliciously warm as you explored his mouth with your own. You loved the way he inhaled you and swallowed the moans he was causing. The intimacy you shared with him never seized to make you weak in the knees, putty in his hands.

"I wanna watch you fuck me in this mirror."

Your words were muttered against his pursed lips and Charles’ eyes were wider than a flying saucer when you pulled back ever so slightly, noses bumping together from how close you still were. He huffed out a soft laugh as you nodded towards the mirrors lining the walls around you both, eyeing your reflection beside him.

"Really?" He asked incredulously, a humorous expression ascending onto his blushing cheeks as you returned the raised brow, confused by his question.

"Do I look like I'm joking?" You scoffed, the deadpan look never faltering from your face and causing his goofy smile to fall; finally realising you were being serious.

"Well... no you don't but... Do you want me to do you against the mirror or on here?" Charles asked frowning down at the bench before bouncing up and down on it to make sure it was sturdy enough for your spontaneous demand.

"I don't really care," You almost moaned, smoothing your hands across his strong chest and over his tense shoulders, leaning down and pressing your lips to his damp neck again.

"I don't wanna risk breaking this because it was the last one at the shop so I guess we could do it against the mirrors…”

The hesitation in his voice caused your brows to furrow in disappointment and your hands to drop from his shoulders as you stood up straight, looking down at your boyfriend with a frown.

"Jeez, don't get too excited about it."

The sarcasm was dripping from your tone as Charles shook his head fervently, quickly reaching out to pull you back. All he could think about daily was making love to you in different places in the house and shockingly, the home gym hadn’t been ticked off the list but god, did he want to. He was already twitching thinking about it, the tightness of his shorts already cutting off circulation to his legs.

"No, no. Baby, look at you – I am so excited but you caught me off guard and I was just trying to think… what’s the word? Logically… Logistically…”

"It’s logistically but honey – you called me in here and made me watch you gyrating and make sex noises, and then you told me I look cute and now you're caught off guard that I want to have sex with you?... Are you okay?" You joked, pressing the back of your hand against Charles’ sticky forehead, pretending to check if he had a temperature or if he even had a pulse at all.

He laughed, borderline giggled and shook his head, "Well, when you say it like that, it makes sense. I just didn't think you'd get turned on over that."

You couldn't help but laugh in his face at his assumption, "You're shirtless and sweaty and wearing shorts that are so tight that I can see your dick... There's no way you didn't think this would get me going."

You wagged your finger up and down his body and Charles simply shrugged, hardening by the second, "It didn't even cross my mind but if it's getting your going then let's fucking go!"

Charles slapped his hands down on his lap and immediately reached for the drawstring on your shorts. “These are definitely coming off…” He murmured, eyes narrowed in concentration as he slid them down your legs.

"I promise if we break the bench, I will personally call every single shop in Monaco and replace it.”

You stepped out of the cotton material around your ankles, grasping Charles’ shoulders for balance as he tugged on his own shorts; finally liberating himself of the constriction caused by his own unadulterated arousal. He had no control when it came to you.

"Jeez, you are horny," Charles teased as you climbed on top of him; his tactile hands guiding your knees to each side of his thighs with a devilish grin.

He was in his element with you on top of him; he had the perfect view of his girl and he could feel how ready you were for him when you rested on his thigh, your slickness cool against his soft skin. He loved how dialled in you were to his touch, every little wince or mumble making his heart pound harder in his chest – blood rushing to his dick every time you whispered in his ear.

But he knew that you knew how much he craved having you like this so of course he teased you in spirited retaliation, like any man desperately in love does to the one he adores the most.

“You know that if you ever need to get some inspiration, you can always come in and watch me work out, baby. You like it a lot, huh?”

"I do and I intend to enjoy this so shut up."

Now he was really hard, worked up beyond his limits.

As a distraction from his edge, he went back to what he did best – kissing you. You were both as pent up as each other, embarrassingly desperate for two people who had been going at it hammer and tong all weekend but you couldn’t get enough. It wasn’t until the firm grip on your hips tightened even more that you finally felt how enthusiastic he was about fucking you in his gym.

"You taste like lemons," Charles mumbled as your tongues collided.

You couldn’t mask the smirk on your lips as he kissed you again, reaching down and massaging him over his boxer briefs. You pulled away slightly from the kiss, ghosting his swollen lips as you softly stroked him in your hand.

"I bet if you'd seen me eating that popsicle, you would've felt the same way as I did watching you lift those stupid weights," and Charles chuckled at your annoyingly accurate theory, his warm breath fanning over my face before seizing your lips again, wiping that smirk on your sweet lips.

"I probably wouldn’t have lasted, let's be absolutely honest, ma belle," He whispered back with a knowing smile, completely unashamed to be enamoured by the woman slowly stoking him, eyes fluttering shut from the pleasure surging through his body.

“Maybe next time, sweetheart.”

Charles simply smiled, eyes barely open as he watched your bodies connecting in the most intimate way, tongue quickly swiping across his bottom lip in preparation for your kiss. As you gripped him tight in your hand and bottomed out on his achingly hard cock, you pressed your lips to his, forced to swallow the loud moan falling from your lips.

l' attente, you whimpered before a sharp inhale caused Charles’ eyes to shoot up to your closed ones, searching your face for any pain.

"You good?" He asked softly but swiftly with his hands firmly placed on the outside of your thighs, gently holding you in place until you have him the okay to move his hips.

"So good," You breathed, tilting your neck back and arching your spine to change the angle a little, feeling that sweet spot deep inside you being brushed ever so gently, “You feel amazing right there.”

Once you both hit that toe curling, achingly good rhythm that you had perfected together, Charles rested his chin on your shoulder and watched how mind-numbingly hot you looked riding him in the mirror, his hands firmly grabbing your ass and spreading you out like a meal he was desperate to devour.

"My god..." He growled as you looked down and followed his eye line, biting your puffy bottom lip when you realised he was watching himself disappear inside you, every inch taken care of. And you too, were groaning at the sight.

“You look gorgeous riding my dick, baby.”

"We look sexy," You were quick to correct, breathless from both the sight of Charles’ large, veiny hands leaving prints on your backside and his relentlessness to have you losing your goddamned mind on his dick.

Both had you twisted in knots, the pit in your stomach tightening with every thrust and all you could do was thank whoever had invented weight training because boy, were you reaping the benefits now. Sex in your home gym – tick.

+ + +

parlez-vous français? (the sequel to itch)

a//n – i had so many asks for 'you're soaked' with baby boy charles so i hope you liked this quick, mostly naughty piece x next on the schedule is danny ric, i believe and i'm horny just thinking about the idea i have for him so stay tuned x masterlist | askbox

#charles leclerc #charles leclerc one shot #charles leclerc imagine #charles leclerc smut #f1 smut #formula 1 #monzamashmasterlist #the monzamash special #charles leclerc x reader #f1 one shot

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smuddee-papabear · 1 month

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naga partner manhandles you with their tail 🙏

Ooh I love nagas. You didn't specify gender so I'm going to make both gender neutral

gender neutral reader X gender neutral naga

Tw: rough handling, biting kink

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Most mornings were easy, your partner was too busy warming up on their heating pad to complain too hard about you going into work. The day would start with you wriggling your way from their sizable tail before taking a shower. You'd get your breakfast and coffee before leaving after giving them a peck on the cheek.

Some mornings, however, they wouldn't let you go without a fight. This was one of them.

"I have to go into work." You know they won't care about that the moment their tail wraps your leg.

Your naga lets out a huffy sigh, tail trailing up. "I could provide you with everything you need without that silly job getting in the way."

"That silly job pays for your food bill." You tease, turning to look at them. It was a mistake. The way the morning light shines on their gorgeous scales is far too distracting. "And your heat pad."

Your naga partner clearly doesn't like that assessment. Their expression darkens slightly. "I can feed us both and I don't need a fancy pad to warm myself."

"Oh no?" Your raised eyebrow is another mistake.

You yelp as a strong force shoves unexpectedly on your chest. Before you know it you're wrapped in a coil and pushed into the floor right in front of them.

Your breath is knocked out of you, and not just from the force of it. Naga!Partner's eyes gleam with satisfaction as they loom above you. You're sure they can feel the jump in your heart rate. A devilish smile crosses their face.

"If you think I can't, get out of my coils and go into work."

For a moment you stare open mouthed at them. Get out of their coils? How does this prove that they can provide for you?

Finally you start wriggling against the well muscled body, trying to ignore how intently your naga watches. It doesn't take long before you're out of breath.

Unwilling to admit defeat you start kicking your legs and manage to make minor headway. Before you can be proud of that you hear tutting from Naga!Partner and another section of tail wraps your legs before you're yanked upside-down and dangled in front of the naga's eyes.

Heat flushes your face. "Hey! I was doing what you told me to!" A chaste kiss to your lips has you too flustered to splutter out more of your indignance.

"Are you just giving up?" The smug tone causes your blush to spread further.

You try to curl up and grab their tail but are stopped when they use another coil to shove up into your back, arching it almost uncomfortably. Once again the breath is knocked from your lungs.

You barely have time to get it back before Naga!Partner shifts the end of their tail to force your legs open just enough to put you in a very vulnerable position. They tease your crotch with the tip.

Despite what you should be wanting, to get free, a sharp moan escapes your mouth.

Your naga's breath tickles the back of your neck and sends shivers through your body. "I can provide for you." Their hiss is somehow so loving and so angry at the same time.

You open your mouth but are embarrassed the only thing leaving it is a breathy whine. Something cold and flat slides into your hand. Only a moment goes by before you realize what. Your phone; a clear demand to call in sick.

It takes effort but you manage to speak without another whine. "I have-...I have to work."

"No," Naga!Partner's teeth skim the skin on your neck. You can feel their fangs trail along. Goosebumps form where they do. "I can provide for you."

"Need...need t wo-work...!" You manage to choke out. To be honest you don't really care about it anymore. Your heart is racing, body throbbing with every shift of your naga's muscles, mind foggy with need.

Their fangs push into your skin. It's not enough to break it but it is enough to cause a jolt through your shaking frame. "I will provide you with what you need today."

You call in sick, and just as promised your Naga!Partner provides all you need and more.

#monster fucker #monster smut #naga smut #monster x reader #monster x human #gender neutral reader #biting kink #hope that was rough enough #it was probably pretty mild actually? sorry if it was less than expected #to be honest I love reading Naga but this is the first time writing it!#pa-bear writes

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sc0tters · 2 months

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Always His | Jack Hughes

summary: you were always meant to be jack's even if he didn't deserve it.

request: yes/no

warnings: sexual themes, swearing, slight degradation, p in v, oral (m receiving, hints to f too), mentions of alcohol.

word count: 6.47k

authors note: this was literally all written today so sorry if it is rushed but I wanted it out before the game (yes we manifested a bit in it) but this is too feed all of the girlies who needed it after the jack content that has come with the stadium series. to the anon who wanted jack and lukes best friend I hope you like this! our honourable mentions today though are @babydollmarauders for picking this plot (cause I'm indecisive) so lets than her for this one coming when it did!

You knew it was stupid coming to New Jersey this weekend.

Jack hadn’t stopped arguing with you since you arrived and Luke thought that he had woken up in some fever dream where his best friend and brother were at odds. You had been around the Hughes family for the last twelve years so it was no surprise that you and Luke grew so close. Being at Umich too it only then on solidified that friendship and everyone swore you were bound to be his one day.

But what they didn’t know was how complicated your past was with Jack. He was always the hot older brother that probably put up with you for the sakes of Luke. So last year when you were at the lake house soaking up the much needed vitamin D, you seemed to finally break Jack.

Not in the sense of emotionally, but you went from being Luke’s best friend to Luke’s hot best friend almost over night. No longer was Jack stopping Trevor’s little flirty comments to you because they were weird, now he wanted to be the one to say them instead. Yet Jack managed to keep his lips shut all the way until your final night at the lake house.

Almost everyone was asleep in the house as the clocks struck 3:19 which meant that nobody noticed when you and Jack were down by the pool table “you are gonna get me in trouble Blossom.” Jack had called you that for years after a Halloween party where you and two of your friends ended up as the power puff girls.

It made you smile as you looked up to see him staring “not doing anything wrong Jacky.” You pointed out as you shook your head “you sure about that doll?” He asked letting out a gasp as your ass went into the air as you potted the ball.

A smirk formed on your lips as you stood up straight “pretty sure.” You watched him take two big steps across the table and before he knew it he was right by your side “think you need to change your answer.” He clicked his tongue when his hands clung to your hips.

The power dynamic had switched as Jack had you swearing you were dreaming “you shouldn’t-” you warned as his lips hovered over yours letting any bit of self restraint leave your body.

Jack scanned your face as he looked for any kind of actual discomfort “tell me you want me to go upstairs without you.” He was amused as he knew he was pushing your buttons in just the right ways.

As your silence made him think that he had gone too far so as he began to pull away it seemed to trigger your mind. Your hands were quick to cup his cheeks bringing his lips onto yours.

Whilst your tongues fought in this needy battle Jack didn’t hesitate to push you onto the pool table letting his hands fiddle with the waistband of your shorts “Jack.” You moaned feeling his teeth graze over your lower lip.

His pupils were blown as they stared directly at yours “I got you Bloss.” The hockey player mumbled as left a trail of hungry kisses down your jaw.

Your legs swing as they hang over the edge of the table “if you aren’t gonna continue then I need you to stop.” You announced feeling yourself get hot under his touch “because I won’t be able to stop myself if you don’t.” Your breath hit the shell of his ear making him grunt.

Jack used little strength to pick you up as your legs locked around his waist “I want you tonight, all of you.” He mumbled kissing your lips again before he walked you both upstairs.

That night caused a fire to roar in your chest as the memories of his hands on your skin plagued your brain. But what you could never seem to shake was the way that he had left you to wake up the next morning all alone. The little evidence that he had been in your room was gone as his T-shirt that had been in your pile of clothes disappeared.

To say you were hurt was an understatement yet the final blow to your heart was that Jack hadn’t just left your room, he left the house. The middle Hughes boy made sure that he was out all day only coming home once he was sure you were at the airport. What made it all that much worse was that he wouldn’t even respond to your messages.

So after a week of trying to get answers from the boy, you stopped caring. You hated how much you had to care about it. Nights were spent avoiding your friends and their nights out as you stayed in your dorm to watch the devils play. You tried so hard to hate him but you couldn’t, and that’s how your friends ended up pulling you out of your rut.

It wasn’t pretty to put it lightly. You were a mess and needed a change which your friends were sure to give you. Jack watched from afar as things began to change. It started with your hair and then before he knew it you were in these tight outfits that had were flashed around your Instagram as you grew closer to the male athletes on campus.

As much as, he wanted to be jealous Jack knew he had brought it on himself. Luke was confused as he watched you step away from him, avoiding all in person contact when you knew that Jack would be there too.

That only worked for so long though as February finally came around and you were left out of excuses to send Luke as to why you were avoiding him. That’s how you landed up on the flight to New Jersey. Of course Jack had no clue you were coming as neither you nor Luke went to offer the boy the courtesy of telling him.

Luke didn’t hesitate to pick you up the moment you were in arms reach of him “Lukey!” You squealed as you were thrown over his shoulder “put me down!” You groaned feeling him almost lose his grip on your legs.

He laughed as he placed you back on the ground “gosh I’ve missed you so much.” Luke mumbled as he pulled you into a hug “too much.” It was the classic bone crushing hug that he loved to give you.

The boy was quick to let you go as he smiled “you’re gonna love the boys.” Luke squeezed your hand as he dragged you through the airport not giving you a chance to respond.

Nerves began to crawl through your body as you found yourself regretting leaving Michigan as you got to the door of the apartment. Jack’s laughter could be heard from inside and you tried your best to act as if it wasn’t terrifying you “you okay?” Luke’s voice was barely a whisper as he saw how your eyes were wide.

You could try to lie to him. You could have tried to say that you were tired or ready to see his family. But Luke knew you like the back of his hand and he would have seen through your lies “just thinking about this weekend.” You were thinking about seeing Jack again but thankfully Luke brought it.

He squeezed your hand once more before he unlocked the door “you took forever!” Jack complained as he dropped his phone into the couch as he locked eyes with you “Bloss.” His eyes grew wide as you tucked your hair behind your ear.

Luke lugged your suitcase into the apartment “hey Jack.” You chewed at the inside of your cheek as all of the emotions that you felt the day he left you come rushing back to you “why are you two being weird?” Luke had watched you both grow comfortable with each other over the summer so now as you stood in tension laced air it was suffice to say that the youngest Hughes noticed.

Jack sat up as he shook his head “just didn’t expect to see her here.” The center wanted to pay little mind to the fact that the last time he saw you, the sun ran through your half drawn curtains and hit your sleeping face to make you look beautiful “think mom said she wanted to talk to you though.” Jack lied handing the youngest Hughes boy his boy before he grabbed you by your arm.

It made a level of panic set through your body “I’ll show you around though.” His tone had him clearly irritated as pulled you into the kitchen “what the fuck are you doing here!” Jack whisper yelled pushing you against the counter top as he sent you a glare.

Your palms grow sweaty as your brain disconnected itself from the rest of your mind “didn’t realise that I fucked you dumb.” He spat as your silence only seemed to piss him off more than “Luke invited me.” You explained crossing your arms as you sent him a scowl.

You watched him process your response as he rolled his eyes “and you decided to come to this of all things?” You knew Jack could be cruel but you had never seen it in person before “Luke started to think that I was mad at him.” You shrugged him off knowing that the answer was more than likely not what he wanted to hear.

As his laugh echoed in your ears you were proved right as you found yourself growing more embarrassed by the second “you start worrying about your friend?” His taunts came as a never ending attack “yes Jack because I’m not a total ass like you.” You spat quickly coming to terms with the fact that the night you spent with Jack was only ever going to be a mere memory.

The boy ran his fingers through his hair as he let out a groan of frustration “just stay out of my way this weekend?” You were unsure if he was asking or telling you to do that but as you saw heard Luke hang up on the call with Ellen, you didn’t want to wait around with Jack “don’t have to tell me twice.” You grumbled pushing past the hockey player as you hit his shoulder on the way out.

At the family skate session came along Jack had to watch you make good on your side of the agreement. Every guy but Jack were privy to your attention but it seemed that as you struggled to skate in a straight line Nico found his place next to you. The interactions were nothing beyond innocent as Nico wanted to know why this was his first time the team was meeting the girl that Luke wouldn’t shut up about. The questions then had to turn to the fact that that Jack had stopped skating as he was now staring daggers at his teammate “should I be worried that Jack is looking at me like that?” Nico’s voice was barely above a whisper as he whispered that into your ear.

You turned to see Jack until he locked eyes with you which made him quickly turn away from you both “Jack is just Jack sometimes I guess?” You let out an awkward laugh “thought it would have been Luke who would have had us all banned from talking to you.” Nico didn’t think much more of it and you were grateful for that as he was quick to pull your attention to Luke in the middle of a media session.

Thankfully for you that was the most you really saw Jack as he made sure to avoid you, the only interactions you ended up having were when he came into the kitchen for his morning coffee and you were still half asleep on the couch. It wasn’t a reality you enjoyed but you assumed that it was the universe’s way of sending you a bit of karma for sleeping with your best friend’s brother. And you stupidly thought that you would be able to get through the entirety of the weekend avoiding Jack, yet Saturday night brought a different story.

The team went out to celebrate the win with their family and friends but you ended up wanting your bed - or in this case your couch - as you wanted to make little effort in trying to communicate with Jack “you sure you don’t want me to take you home?” Luke honestly wanted to spend his time with you and he didn’t mind if that meant leaving the team “no Lu, you go have your fun.” You squeezed his shoulder as you shook your head.

Ellen and Jim were stood waiting for you both as Jack was nowhere in sight “I can get an uber back to yours if you give me your keys.” You held your hand out ready to get your way “I’ll take her home.” The offer made you freeze as the hairs on the back of your neck stood up.

You didn’t even want to turn around as you knew he was looking at you “glad to see you can still be nice Jack.” Ellen teased as she hinted to the fact that she knew something was going on between you both as neither one of you could offer anything more than a glare to the other “you know me.” Jack placed his hand on your back as you chewed at your cheek knowing that Luke was studying your reactions.

He sent you a final look before he kissed your head “I’ll see you when I get home okay?” Fearing what you might let slip from your lips you nodded sending Luke your best smile “have good night you two.” Jim wrapped his arm Ellen before the trio walked off.

The moment they were out of earshot you began to walk off “where do you think that you’re going?” Jack asked as he crossed his arms “home.” You yelled back not daring to turn around.

Jack couldn’t help but roll his eyes “the car is this way.” He pointed to behind himself as it finally made you turn around “I am walking.” You quipped back making his eyes go wide as he took the short few strides to get back to you.

His grip around your wrist was sore “like hell you are.” Jack wanted to kill you for being so stupid. New Jersey at night in the cold was dangerous for anyone, especially for a girl who didn’t know the state. It made you grow angry as he acted like he cared “this is me staying out of your way so why do you care?” You let your brows form a fine line as you glared at him “look if I drive you home we can talk about it there.” Jack let out a groan as he didn’t think that you would be putting up a fight with him for this.

Your mind swayed back and forth as you knew that Luke would want you home safe “fine.” You sighed as you raked your fingers through your hair “gad to see you can still use that brain of yours.” Jack mumbled as he was honestly relieved that he didn’t have to carry you back to his car.

The ride was probably the most awkward thing you had ever been through. Your eyes were locked to your window as you refused to look in Jack’s direction. He was also irritated as he gripped the steering wheel, Jack played the moments from the lake house over in his head.

It was barely 6:00 when Jack woke up, the foreign aspects of the room around him reminded Jack of the events from a few hours ago. Soft breaths left your lips as you snuggled into your pillow “why’d you have to go ahead and be Luke’s best friend.” Jack sighed as he stared at your sleeping state “could have made my life so much easier if you didn’t break his tooth.” You and Luke became the best of friends after you both ended up laughing once Luke got a softball to the mouth when he offered to help you practice for the upcoming season. Jack always did envy his brother for getting you and he buried those emotions through acting like you were irritating.

Quinn’s voice echoed through the hall as he was on the phone to Olivia who was in Europe awaiting her boyfriend’s arrival “thanks for the night Blossom.” Jack kissed your forehead, careful not to wake you up as you began to stir in your sleep. The middle Hughes boy did his best to ignore the way that guilt consumed his mind. With one quick movement he took his clothes off of your floor as he sent you one final look before he snuck out of your room.

He felt like he was in the middle of a back and forth with himself as he sighed; this wasn’t something he could do again because as much as you might have been good for him, Jack knew he wasn’t good for you. And that was enough for him to make sure you didn’t have a reason to argue with him, it’s the very reason he made sure he wasn’t home when you woke up.

As you let the apartment door slam shut behind you Jack was pulled away from the memory, as happy or sad as it might have been. You headed straight to the kitchen “don’t walk away from me!” Jack dropped his keys in the bowl by his table as he scoffed “you did it to me first.” You were quick to quip back as the words rolled off of your tongue.

It made Jack scoff “that’s not fair.” He shook his head following you into the room as he was now ready to open the can of worms that you were angling to “you want me to tell you what isn’t fucking fair Jack?” You took a step closer to him as you swore that his words were cruel.

You felt tears form in your eyes even as you refused to give him the satisfaction of seeing you like that “having to wake up alone and get treated like the biggest mistake of your life.” Your voice broke by the end of your words as you didn’t think you would have the power within yourself to hold it together “so you don’t get to stand here and act like I’m being some brat for no fucking reason.” You spat as you went to leave yet you were pulled back by his hand around yours.

Jack cleared his throat as he sighed “I did it to protect you and Luke!” It was no secret that Luke would have been heart broken if he knew that there was something going on with you and one of his brothers, that was a line you were never allowed to cross unscathed.

Yet his words didn’t bring you the comfort he would have hoped for as it made you roll your eyes“don’t roll your eyes at me.” Jack scowled closing the gap to nothing between you both “or what?” You grumbled still agitated as you were left wanting to slap him.

The middle Hughes boy clicked his tongue “I’m not against fucking this bratty attitude out of you.” He warned making you scoff “what about protecting Luke?” You weren’t against using his words from just a few second ago against him as they ran off your tongue.

Jack laughed as he ran his fingers through the ends of your hair “seems like he can handle sharing you so well already.” His voice was laced with envy as he remembered watching you hold onto Nicos arm for dear life and Luke didn’t even bat an eye at it.

You knew it was truly wrong to admit but you were now feeling flustered “so this is all cause you couldn’t handle me getting a little male attention?” You cocked your head as you fiddled with the ends of your sleeves “you got a lot more than a little.” Jack’s voice was barely above a mumble.

Your eyes locked onto his as a smirk formed on your lips “not from anyone that mattered.” It seemed to be the line that got to Jack as he brought his hands to your cheeks as he kissed you.

It wasn’t like the lake house when it was full of lust, this time it seemed that frustration drove that kiss. Milliseconds went by until you had your hands under his shirt trailing up his skin as if this was clockwork in your brains. He let his hand move to the nape of your neck afraid he might lose you if he didn’t hold you. A moan left your lips as his other hand squeezed your ass letting him slide his tongue into your mouth.

He truly never thought he would be the kind of guy who could find himself obsessed with how sweet someone could be. No longer did you have the taste of the cheap beer that Trevor bought on your tongue and now you were like an addictive substance to Jack “fuck you’re such a pretty fucking girl.” He groaned pulling his lips away from yours as he picked you up letting the actions mirror those of the night at the lake house.

A squeal left your lips as you steadied yourself on him with your arms around his neck “shame you had to not be in my jersey though.” The hockey player mumbled as he pecked your lips taking the short walk to his room with you in his arms.

The moment you two walked in there you let your foot shut the door as you didn’t want to break the kiss “you get me in your jersey when you don’t act like a child.” You announced remembering the fact that Jack had been watching you in all of Luke’s merchandise and clothing all weekend.

You were unsure if what you said was right when he practically threw you to his bed “was gonna treat you like a princess tonight but it seems like all you wanna do is keep on acting like a brat.” Jack sighed as he pulled his coat off of his shoulders “and we all know that brats don’t get rewarded.” He leaned down letting his mouth ghost your ear.

Your gasps went straight to his cock as it grew hard against his jeans “then why am I here for you?” It was a blow that made him tug his fingers in the roots of your hair “god are you always this fucking talkative?” Jack spat as he rolled his eyes “really think I need to shut you up.” He mumbled to himself hating how you pushed his buttons and that he actually enjoyed it too.

His nimble fingers undid his pants letting them drop to his knees as Jack let his hand wrap around his aching cock whilst he pumped it a few times “you remember our safe word?” The hockey player wasn’t a monster and make sure you had a word you could use if he pushed you too far “Ace.” You nodded feeling your mouth water at the sight of his precum oozing out of his swollen head.

Jack watched you take some kind of initiative as you moved your hips closer to the edge of his bed only stopping when his cock was merely centimeters away from your face “you look so pretty down there.” The compliment made you squirm as your tongue began to do these kitten licks to his cock peppering kisses on the swollen tip “c’mon Bloss you know how to use your mouth properly so don’t start with this shit.” Jack warned as he reminded you about the last time that you had sucked him off.

That was all it took for you to force your lips around his cock beginning to take as much of him as you could “that wasn’t so hard now was it my sweet girl?” He spoke through gritted teeth as you began to settle on a steady rhythm with your hands going flat against his thighs “let me see your pretty face as you suck my cock f’me.” Jack cooed running his fingers through your hair as he made a makeshift ponytail up as his hands helped you take more of him.

Your tongue swirled around his cock as you looked up at him through your batted eyelashes “tried playing nice and like a good big brother when I could have had all this.” Jack grumbled letting his grip around your head tighten as he grew annoyed “cause you just know you’re my little slut ain’t ya Blossom?” Your thighs came together to suppress the desire that came through your mind as you hollowed out your cheeks.

Even if you had only slept with him once before this you knew how to get Jack to the point of no return and that was through turning your mouth into a vacuum of sorts “god you’re so fucking good at this.” Jack groaned as he shook his head as his eyes screwed shut “just like that and then I’ll fuck you real good.” The offer didn’t go missed even as you opened your throat to take more of him.

It was that gesture that sent him over the edge as his body began to shake “you gonna let me make a mess in that pretty little mouth of yours?” He asked surprising himself that the question even came out of his lips. All you could do was nod in response as the sounds of you gagging around him and the warm feeling of your mouth practically sucking him like a straw were enough to push Jack over the edge “right there f-uck!” The hockey player kept your lips wrapped around him for a few more seconds forcing you to breathe through your nose as he began to get control over his breathing again.

Your mouth felt warm as his cock slid out of your mouth leaving your jaw sore “lemme see you swallow that f’me doll.” He mumbled softly placing his hand around your throat so that he could feel you swallow before you stuck your tongue out. Jack watched in awe as a string of spit left his lips and landed on your tongue as you brought it back into your mouth pressing your lips shut “good girl.” He good bending down to peck your lips.

He was reminded on the 43 jersey you were in and that brought a scowl to his lips “think it’s about time I get you out of this.” He added as he shook his head still cringing at the fact that you were in someone else’s jersey “you jealous or something Jacky?” You teased as his fingers ran over the waistline making you lift your arms up.

Jack scoffed as he rolled his eyes “ya cause I’m gonna be jealous of someone else when it’s me who get’s to fuck you at the end of the night?” The hockey player could have laughed at the absurdity behind your words “I could have any man that I wanted.” Even you were unsure of your words as you were left in your bra.

It made him smirk as he crouched to be eye level with you once more “you could have anyone.” He nodded as he took in the sight of the lacey bra against your skin “but you choose to fuck me each time it seems.” You didn’t know how he did it, Jack could take your insults to him and fully flip them on It’s head.

The hockey player ran his finger up your chest from the valley between your breast “don’t go getting in your head now Blossom.” He pleaded as he hooked his fingers under your chin as he forced you to look at him “you gonna let me make you feel good tonight doll?” It seemed that his pet names for you were in full use tonight as if he feared that he would never get the chance to use them on you ever again.

Yet it was so much more complicated than that as you nodded “make me feel special Jacky.” You begged as your voice got caught in your throat “you are forever my special girl Blossom.” Jack mumbled as he stripped you out of your pants and undergarments leaving you fully nude whilst he still had his shirt on “this is mean Jack.” You complained making him smile.

He pressed his lips against yours as he his hands came down on either side of you “just like seeing how wet you get for me.” He confessed eating up the way you whimpered in response “don’t even think that I need to get you ready for me.” The boy confessed as you nodded before he leaned back up to pull the shirt off his body when he kicked his pants off “need your cock.” You begged feeling his fingers run up and down your slit spreading your wetness over your clit “when you ask me so nicely how could I say no?” The question was rhetorical as the sound of him ripping open the condom wrapper was like music to your ears.

Your legs on impulse came up as your heels pressed against your ass “look at you getting all ready f’me.” Jack cooed as he rolled the condom over hid hardening cock “been thinking about doing this all weekend.” He confessed as he ran the covered head over your slit and down your slit before he stopped it at your glistening hole.

His eyes never left yours “yet you had to go act like-“ you were quickly cut off when Jack bottom you out leaving you both silent as your cunt stretched to hug his cock “I act like what?” Jack’s lips found your neck as he began to nip at the skin making you moan.

Jack gave you a few seconds to settle into it before he began moving again “like a fucking asshole.” You moaned bringing your hands up between your bodies as you went to tease your breasts “those are mine Bloss.” He shook his head “and since I’m such an asshole ‘m not gonna share.” It was a quick movement that had your legs over his shoulders as he arched his back allowing him to bring his lips to your nipple.

The feeling made your eyes flutter as his cock hit parts of you that you truly didn’t think were possible “just like that Jack.” You whispered digging your shoulder blades into your bed as you moaned “why are you so quiet?” It was like he wasn’t okay with that as he rolled his eyes “got the whole fucking apartment to yourself so I wanna hear you tell Jersey who is fucking you like this.” Your cunt clenched around him as his words brought this new possessive sense over him.

It made Jack smirk as he brought his lips back up to yours “you enjoy it when I tell you you’re mine?” You weren’t sure if he actually meant it but those words from his lips made you feel like you were dreaming “so so much.” You nodded as he kissed your lips finally tasting his salty release on your tongue that made his cock throb all over again.

The chain that he was wearing from his pregame outfit was still on and it hit your chin as Jack began to quicken his thrusts “wanna make such a fucking mess in your cunt.” His hand softly slapped your thigh as you bit your lip “remember I wanna hear you or I stop.” His warning was all too serious for you as you felt your coil in your stomach begin to tighten.

A flurry of moans and incoherent sounds left your lips as you panicked “you fuck me so good.” Was the only thing he understood before you let his chain get trapped between your lips “you getting close pretty girl?” Jack asked as he let his hand trail between your two sweaty bodies feeling your cunt practically suffocate his cock.

Your head bobbed as he took it as the chance to increase the pace of his thrusts only resulting in a cry that left your throat feeling raw when his fingers began rubbing at your clit “theres my sweet girl.” Jack cooed as the sound of skin slapping echoed in your ears “Jacky ‘m gonna come.” You announced as your legs began to shake trying to trap Jack in your grip.

He shook his head “fucking hold it.” All Jack needed was a little more as he could feel himself not far behind you at all “please!” You begged not knowing how much more of this you could take as it felt like al of the air within your lungs had been taken from you.

His lips were rough against your jaw “told you to fucking hold it.” Jack spat clearly not interested in your complaints as your fingers tugged through his hair “fuck baby you are perfect.” He grunted as you tried to kiss him needing something to stop you from begging and pleading with him to make you come as you feared that you might then not come at all tonight.

You didn’t even stop to notice his words as they were shortly followed by “make a mess on my cock Bloss.” You didn’t need to be told twice and you felt your eyes roll back into your head as your cunt practically spasmed around his cock “fuck fuck shit!” You groaned letting your toes curl as tour body writhed against his.

Jack’s orgasm shortly followed yours as he tried his hardest to fuck you through yours “got you my girl.” He mumbled kissing your shoulder blade as he went to rest his head from a moment when his movements stifled. You both lay there for a few moments trying to catch your breath “holy shit.” Your chest heaved as he slid out of you making him laugh.

The sight of your release oozing out of your cunt made Jack feel warm inside “holy shit in deed.” He nodded in agreement pecking your lips before he got up “think you are up for a bath?” Aftercare did happen to be something that Jack was surprisingly good at but these were stops he only ever pulled for you.

You nodded as you sent him a soft smile “always.” As he picked you up and brought you into the bathroom it was no secret that you were close to falling asleep and Jack was honestly surprised you held out on shutting your eyes until you got dress and was tucked back into his bed where the warmth of his covers took over.

As you woke up with an arm still firmly gripped around your waist you couldn’t help but blink repeatedly gaining your bearings of this foreign room. A soft groan left your lips as you rolled over to see Jack smiling back at you “hey Bloss.” His words were soft as he ran his hand up your side.

You sent him a dull smile as you yawned “think I need to get up.” You went to lean forward as the center stopped you “told Luke you went for a run.” Jack handed you back your phone as he didn’t want to lean over you again to continue charging it.

The boy went to kiss your lips but you were only confused as you looked at him “you know my password?” You tried to remain calm as there were definitely a set of lingerie pictures that you did not want him to ever see.

Your worries made him laugh “you’re gonna have to pick something a little bit harder than your birthday if you want to act shocked.” Jack teased making your cheeks turn red “you’re cute when you get all flustered.” He added delivering the compliment as though it was liquid gold.

His fingers were rough against your jaw as he hooked them under your chin “what are we doing Jack?” You sighed pressing your hand against his chest as you feared not having the strength to say this to him tomorrow.

He frowned as he looked at you “I was gonna kiss ya.” The hockey player pointed out in a duh tone “I mean this.” You motioned between the two of you as this was the second time you landed up in his bed in eight months.

The boy sighed as it was clearly something he didn’t want to talk about “why does it have to be anything?” Jacks words struck you like a slap to the face “you said you liked me last night.” Amid all the arguing you still remembered his confession.

Jack watched you sit up straight as you were met with his silence “let’s just keep things casual.” Jack meant what he said about being worried about hurting Luke and you were still in college and over an hour away by plane. He wouldn’t say this part to you but he was also scared of committing to you and having it stay that way.

Your entire body cringed “so you can continue fucking every little puck bunny that lays her eyes on you?” It was a low blow but you were hurt “firstly I haven’t slept with anyone since the lake house.” He pointed his finger at you making you go quiet.

He continued on “I wanna scream that you’re mine from the roof but now just isn’t the right time for us to get serious.” Jack knew how to make you turn to putty in his hands “you’re right.” You didn’t even know if you agreed with him.

But as he flipped you over leaving you on your back you couldn’t say no to him “of course I am.” Jack nodded letting his lips nip at your skin.

It made a breath catch in your throat “now stop using your pretty little head and let me make you feel good.” He ordered pushing your shirt over your stomach “please Jack.” Your voice was airy as you felt him pull your legs apart letting him face your soaked cunt.

You couldn’t help but wonder as you watched Jack lower his head, if he was truly stupid enough to think that you would wait for him.

But in reality, maybe it was that you craved his love enough to stay, so what would happen when a certain Wolverine began to play his cards right with you?

#jack hughes smut #jack hughes x reader #jack hughes imagines #jack hughes oneshots #nhl smut #nhl imagines #hockey smut #hockey imagines #imagines #oneshots #hockey oneshots #nhl oneshots #amber writes fics

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awfcspencer · 3 months

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Sweet N Low || alexia putellas x reader

alexia putellas x reader

prompt: Alexia and you are in a friends with benefits situation, but what if you each realize you each want something more but at different times.

warnings: angst, smut (top!alexia with bottom!reader), begging, fingering, strap

a/n: inspired by sweet n low by lily kincade with some of the lyrics slightly modified to fit better.

Part 2 Here

“She leaves my place at 3 a.m. She’s just here to take the edge off”

“Alexia… please I’m close” You beg out, gripping the white satin sheets. You and Alexia had been at it all night.

Alexia was kneeling with her face between your legs as she sucks on your clit with a harsh tug every so often. Her fingers knuckle deep in your heat as she watches you come apart under her. The panting breaths and the moans leaving your mouth filled the room as Alexia pounded into you.

“Cum” is all she needed to say.

Feeling the familiar tight coil in your stomach. Your back arches off the bed and your hips buck forward as you reach orgasm for the third time tonight.

“Fuck” Your raspy, breathless voice cries out.

Alexia helps guide you through your high as your legs spasm and your thoughts are no longer clouded with the stress of the work week that you had experienced, but rather drunk off the way Alexia is touching you.

Alexia didn't want to stop, she had to keep going. She didn't want to face the reality that when you were done, you would leave. You never spent the night. No post-sex shower or cuddles. At the end of the night, Alexia would be all alone.

Alexia licks another hot stripe up your sensitive heat as you try to pull away from her, knees buckling. But she is a lot stronger than you, placing a hand on your stomach as she pushes you back down.

“Alexia” you whimper out. The room is hot, sweat droplets have formed on your forehead.

“One more. I know you have one more.” she demands. She continues her ministrations on your clit, her tongue buried deep inside you, sending ripples of pleasure throughout your body.

It doesn’t take long for you to reach your high and Alexia knows it. She can tell by the way your thighs tighten around her head, moans becoming louder. You ride out your high and Alexia cleans you up with a warm towel and grabs the water she had placed on the nightstand.

You lingered in her bed, in her arms, as your body comes down. Far longer than you meant to, but not nearly long enough for Alexia. But now you need to go, another long work week ahead of you. It’s routinely at this point. You collect your clothes of the bedroom floor that Alexia threw off when you had first arrived and leave. No hug or kiss goodbye, just a forward head nod and a promise to text her when you arrived home. It was easiest this way you thought, not wanting to ruin what you had going on. Alexia was there to take the edge off.

Each time you left, Alexia felt a piece of her heart break, not that she would ever tell you that though.

“I like it when she misses me. So, I make it a habit to be keeping myself busy.”

Meetings, meetings, and more meetings. A high executive job that requires your upmost time and effort. You had worked your way up the corporate ladder on your own. You had rightfully earned everything that came to you.

In the middle of another late night spent at the office, you hear a ping that gains your attention. An all too familiar ping at this hour.

A simple text from Alexia, ‘Come over.’

You had been plenty busy prepping for a huge presentation that could be influential for your career. Maybe purposefully ignoring Alexia, secretly loving when she missed you. Wanting to hear her beg, beg you to come over, just like when you have to beg her to let you cum. You click the call button and it barely rung twice before Alexia picked up.

“Hello.”

“Quick answer. Must be extra needy.” you hum out, knowing you were riling her up, getting on her nerves. The sex was always better this way.

It was an interesting dynamic between the two of you. You held the power in deciding when you would go over, when you would let her fuck you senseless. Alexia held all the power in the bedroom though. It was the easiest way to forget everything going on. To clear your mind. A release. Letting Alexia guide your body to a release.

“Come over.” she demanded again in a stern voice. You can tell she meant every word, a tiny hint of desperation that only you would be able to pick up on though.

“Now you know that is not how it works Alexia.” It was like giving Alexia a taste of her own medicine. You needed to hear it, hear her beg for you.

“Please.”

“Please what Alexia?” You knew you were already going to give in to the desire. Packing up your belongings and swiftly exiting the office.

“Please come over.” Alexia begs.

“Now was that so hard? I was already on my way.” You baited her and did it successfully. A small huff leaving the midfielder’s mouth right before you hung up.

—————

A desperate Alexia was always means for rough sex.

Pounding into you from behind as if her life depended on it. Hips hoisted upwards with help from a pillow. Your ass in the air, Alexia’s favorite view, bent over begging as she stroked in and out with impeccable pace. An impending orgasm sitting in your tight stomach.

Alexia quickens her pace, hitting deep with every thrust. Pleasure is rippling through your body as you began to quiver, desperate to let go. But you knew the rules, Alexia’s rules.

“Ale… Please, please… let me cum” You didn’t think you could hold any longer. Your words came out in breathy moans. The tension in your core ached and your legs were sore, Alexia was on one tonight.

The nickname had slipped out of your mouth. An accident that was quickly forgotten as you tried to not reach your high without her permission.

Alexia was blindsided by the nickname, you always called her Alexia, never Ale. Thoughts of what this could possibly mean, were you falling for her like she was falling for you? Caught up in the moment she almost forgot to let you let go.

“Cum for me.”

Her words were the final straw, sending your body over the edge. She coaxes you through your orgasm, slowing down her movements and eventually pulling out.

The routine began again, the warm towel and the water. Each night, for some reason that you weren’t necessarily sure of just yet, you would spend longer and longer in Alexia’s arms. Her strong arms wrapped around your smaller body, it was comforting and safe.

You had to leave though, the routine would be broken. It worked better this way. Alexia understood the rules, understood why they were put there in the first place. A late night hookup, friends with benefits situation, nothing more. What happens when one wants more though?

The nickname you had used for Alexia sent a wave of confidence through her body. She wanted you to stay. She wanted to spend the night cuddling your warm body. She wanted to make you breakfast in the morning and spend the day on the couch watching a film. She wanted you to stay. She didn’t want to be alone anymore, she wanted you.

Trying to untangle yourself from the Spaniard, you can tell she is lost in thought. Like she was trying to figure something out in her head.

“Stay?” Her voice was vulnerable and quiet. She knew that it was uncharted territory, uncharted for a reason. Her eyes locked in a staring match with yours. She could tell it was a battle deciding in your head.

Should you stay or should you go?

Against every single fiber in your body that screamed no, you lied back down, your chest finding her back as you relaxed into her.

As you dozed off in her arms, her scent invading your nose, you swore up and down that this was a one time thing. In no way shape or form would you be staying over again. It could ruin the setup you two had, no one was supposed to catch feelings. Tonight was just different. A one time occurrence.

Unfortunately for Alexia, she was far to deep. Since the arrangement had been made, she wanted to scream at the top of her lungs that she fucked up, she had fallen for you. Besides the life altering sex the two of you had, in the small moments where the two of you were actually friends, she could see your humor, you always managed to make the usually serious captain laugh. She loved the passion you had for your job because she had it for hers too. Your smile made her smile, your laugh made her laugh. Ultimately, Alexia knew she had fucked up, she had caught feelings when the one simply rule was don’t catch feelings.

Waking up early the next morning, Alexia was set on making a lovely breakfast for the two of you to enjoy. Her smile quickly falling though, your side of the bed was cold and empty. Alexia thought that maybe, just maybe, you also wanted something more, but she guesses she was completely wrong. Your absence speaking volumes. A single text message on her phone from you, ‘home’.

Ever since you had stayed over that one night, you found yourself staying over several nights after that, but always leaving before Alexia woke up.

Alexia was hurt, more than hurt. Her heart was broken. She couldn’t keep doing this to herself, it wasn’t fair to her. It seemed obvious that that feelings were not mutual so she forced herself to move on, she had to, or she would never get over you. She knew a girl at the local cafe near the training grounds who was interesting, maybe she would finally take her up on her offer for a date.

You had left a few hours before Alexia had woken up. It was the routine. You could not fall for Alexia, and you hadn’t, yet. Pushing the thoughts of Alexia to the back of your mind as you start yet another busy week at work.

“Yeah, she says she talks to other people. But I guess that’s okay if we’re both saying that we’re single.”

Alexia had been distant the last few days. Your texts were delivered, you were sure of it, but there was silence from the other end of the line.

You thought about calling her, missing her. Her body. And secretly maybe her strong arms and comforting post-sex cuddles.

You had tried so hard to force yourself not to fall for the girl, but maybe you had? Maybe you had fallen for Alexia?

Thankfully Alexia had shown signs of life and requested you to come over. You hadn’t seen her in a few days so you hoped tonight would be rough. But it wasn’t.

Alexia took things slow, kissing every inch of your body, almost as if she was savoring the taste of you, like she wouldn’t ever taste you again. Forcing Alexia lower as you were getting impatient, she suddenly stopped and sat up.

“Is there something wrong” You asked, thighs rubbing together to get some sort of friction to where you really needed it.

“I’m talking to someone.”

Her words hit like you like a truck. You had just gotten to a place where you had accepted maybe you had fallen for the girl. The girl who even when she fucked you raw, always made sure to clean you up and give you food and water. The girl who stayed up after rounds of tiring sex to make sure she received your text that you had arrived home. The girl who shared similar interests and passions with.

Fuck, you had fallen for Alexia when she clearly hadn’t fallen for you.

“Oh… yeah that’s good, yeah good for you. I um, I’ve got to go, early meeting tomorrow.” You quickly reply. Needing to escape not only the embarrassment, but also the pain in your heart.

Collecting your clothes, just like in the routine, you couldn’t bare to make eye contact with her. Tears begging to leave your eyes. And as you walked out of Alexia’s home for the last time, you had come to terms that Alexia simply hadn’t felt the same. You didn’t expect her to, you were both single anyway, a situation-ship that had to end sometime right?

#woso x reader #woso community #woso fanfics #woso imagine #woso #woso one shot #woso soccer #woso blurbs #womens soccer #woso couples #woso smut #alexia putellas x y/n #alexia putellas x reader #alexia putellas #alexia x reader #barca femeni #barcelona femeni

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transmascissues · 5 months

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some thoughts about top surgery recovery, as of 3 days post-op:

when they say using your chest muscles sucks afterward, i never realized exactly how much was going to be be limited. coughing, sneezing, hiccuping, laughing — all of it is terrifying right now. even talking for too long starts to put that kind of stress on my chest, and my voice isn’t as strong as it usually is. it takes me forever to fully empty my bladder when i’m on the toilet because i’m totally relying on gravity to do all the work (and shitting was effectively impossible without a stool softener even though i haven’t taken the pain meds they said i would need them for)…and don’t even get me started on figuring out how to wipe (hint: back to front while sitting, using my dominant hand to push my non-dominant hand far back enough). using the computer is also harder — i was planning on playing lots of baldur’s gate after, but for the first couple days i could only really go for a few minutes before using my arms that way got too tiring. having a mastectomy pillow has been an absolute godsend when i’m using my phone because i can prop my arms up on it and not really have to use any muscles at all to hold them up.

the biggest piece of not being able to use my chest muscles right now, which i’m writing separately because it’s been such a huge thing for me, is that i cannot sit up or back by myself at fucking all. like, if i sit on the couch and lean back a bit to sit against the cushion, it hurts to pull myself back up to fully straight — and if i’m leaning back any more than that, i just can’t do it at all and i’m stuck there unless my boyfriend puts their hands behind me and pushes my dead weight back up. i totally get why some people sleep in a recliner now because i’m completely at the mercy of having someone there to help move me around once i’m at any sort of angle. sitting back is mostly the same as far as what i can do, and arguably hurts worse to attempt at all, but my ability to do it seems to be coming back faster than my ability to sit up. if you’ve never had your mobility limited to that extent before, prepare yourself: the first time you’re stuck somewhere and the person who normally helps you doesn’t answer immediately can be really fucking scary (i learned that the hard way).

the anesthesiologist warned me that i might have a sore throat after surgery from being intubated, but i was not prepared for what “sore throat” ended up meaning for me. you know that feeling of swallowing something that’s too big and you can still feel it in your throat even after it’s down? it’s like that times 20, and further down in my throat. the worst pain i’ve felt in the last three days wasn’t from the surgery itself, it was from trying to swallow pancakes when my throat was at it’s worst. today is the first day it’s even started to fade, and even now, it hurts just to swallow my own spit. i don’t know about you, but that’s not what comes to mind when someone tells me “you might have a sore throat”.

on that note, the incisions themselves have really been the least painful part in general, probably because the nerves there aren’t reconnected yet. the vast majority of my pain and discomfort at this point has been from the drains and bandages — the drain sites getting sore or just randomly starting to sting, waking up feeling suffocated by the ace bandages, etc. it’s not because anything is wrong with them — the drains weren’t placed wrong and the bandages aren’t too tight, they’re just a huge pain in the ass to deal with 24/7. i can’t express how much i’m looking forward to getting the drains out and being able to take binder breaks because it’ll make things so much more comfortable.

my incisions are connected in the middle because my chest tissue was all really close together, and the part where the incisions connect is really the only part where i’ve felt any pain so far. i suspect it’s because the swelling on either side is making that part of the incision push together and press against itself, and then the binder pushes on it even more. it’s not a severe pain at all, but i do sometimes lift the center of the bandage off my chest for a second to give that spot a bit of a break.

i’ve already started getting some of the weird sensations associated with nerves reconnecting, and it definitely is wild. so far, it’s been mostly tingly feelings, sometimes like chills and sometimes more like a limb falling asleep. (weird observation: taking a shit makes my ribs tingle? i’ve got no good explanation for that one.) i’ve gotten a zap on one side and some buzzing feelings too. it’s pretty mild right now, probably because it’s so early on.

i’ve also gotten what i would describe as phantom boob feelings, especially on the first night. specifically, when i close my eyes, sometimes i’ll feel like someone is touching or jiggling the boobs i don’t have anymore. definitely not a super pleasant experience, but i think being out of it from the anesthesia still really helped me not be too upset by the worst of it. i’ve gotten a couple little phantom nipple touches too, but those were just split second blips of sensation that were far less bothersome in comparison.

i never realized that the classic post-op hunch is caused more by the binder than by the body itself, but we had to take all of my bandages off the night after my surgery to send pictures of something to my surgeon, and i was shocked by how much straighter i could sit with everything off. i was definitely still hunched, but it was more like a natural slouch and less like i looked like i was using an invisible walker. with the binder on, it’s super uncomfortable for me to try to stand straight at all because it feels like the ace bandage doesn’t come with my body and just drags everything down, and i’m always holding my mastectomy pillow or my hands to my chest while i walk around to stop it from feeling like gravity is going make the bandage tear my chest open.

every so often, when things are getting especially painful or uncomfortable or just generally difficult, i do start to wonder if i made the right choice. not because i regret getting rid of those things — not by a long shot — but because it’s a fucking hard process to go through. this is probably the hardest thing for me to admit, but the rational part of my mind knows it’s natural to feel that way once in a while. all of this is temporary and the relief from dysphoria will be permanent, but right now? this is my entire world and it doesn’t feel particularly temporary and i do have moments of “why do i have to go through all this when other people get to just have the right body from the start? why couldn’t i just live with what i had? why can’t i just be living my normal life right now?” no matter how sure you are of your choice, no matter how proud you are of being trans, this shit is hard and it’s okay to feel that.

i’m going to put the pictures of my chest one day post-op under the cut, because i think it’s pretty rare to see pictures from that soon after the surgery. they’re not gorey at all — the actual incisions are totally covered by steri strips and everything around them is clean — but still, if you don’t want to see relatively fresh surgery results, don’t look under the cut.

for all the discomfort and pain and limitations and other weirdness of recovery, every time i look at these pictures it reminds me of exactly why i’m doing all of this, and i’m so glad i kept fighting for this for so long. some people might never understand why someone would choose to go through this whole process, but i know it’ll be worth it in the end.

here’s my chest one day post-op! i think it looks super good and my surgeon said it looks like it��s healing perfectly (as much as it can be healing at one day). for reference, my chest was a DDD/F before surgery. i know this isn’t how my chest will look in the end, but i’m already thrilled with how things are turning out! i’ve truly never been more confident in my choice of surgeon — like, come on! look at that! she did so good!

#top surgery adventures #<- gonna start putting all the posts about my top surgery in that tag #top surgery #trans man #transmasc

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orangelala · 16 days

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touch me - m.s

female reader x dom matt

summary: after a night out with the triplets, matt finally has you right where he wants you. what happens when he finally breaks down your barriers?

warnings: SMUT, pure filth, nsfw, thigh riding, choking, spanking, hair pulling, fingering, praising, oral (female receiving) p in v, swearing, pet names, some use of y/n (18+)

word count: 850+ words

i sat watching him move. gracefully, like art in motion. the strength in his arms. muscles that clothed his legs. i let him play. my flesh immersed in his scent and i was captivated by the sweetness of his kiss. so i let go.

freed my thoughts to run. he touched me. caressed my chin and walked away. blankets of warmth slept over every inch of my flesh, leaving me flustered under my own skin. yet it was his glance that pierced through me before he spoke a word. i knew his demand, so i kneeled and crawled towards him. "good girl." it turned me on to please him.

he turns around and leans down, gripping beneath my thighs before lifting me off the floor, easing me onto his thigh as he sits us down. "this?" he asks. "more," i whisper. “i know what you want, but i love to hear you beg." i began to grind myself on him for friction as i feel drenched in my wetness.

"that's it, princess. ride my thigh. push that gorgeous pussy harder against me and soak my jeans until i have a wet spot on my thigh from all those juices dripping out just for me. cum for daddy." he holds my gaze, tightening his grip on my neck when my eyes start to close as pleasure washes over me.

i don't hold back my moans, not caring if anyone hears. my breath comes out in hard pants as i stare at him, the way my body shakes and clenches tells me he's going to have a very obvious wet spot on his thigh. i feel like liquid, boneless, and finally feel like my chest isn't as tight as before.

"there she is, my girl."

"fuck," i gasp, closing my eyes and burying my face against the pillows as i collapse onto the bed. he doesn't let me rest for long, though. matt reaches out to thread his fingers in my hair, yanking-my face up for my viewers to see and to whisper abousltle sweet nothings.

i was confused as now when he grabs both of my wrists and places them behind my back. “what are you doing?" he kisses the hollow of my throat. "i want you at my mercy while i do all the sick, perverted things ive been dreaming about for months."

"tell them how i feel," he orders, and when i only whimper, he lightly slaps my ass. "don't tease them, y/n, baby. that's not very nice." neither is he, and i worry that ive gotten in over my head this time.

he was rough around the edges, and that attracted me. far too deeply. i loved the way he plays my body. like a cello rested against the wall. my arms, he grips beneath his hand while the other one hovers over my skin.

fingers tug my lip and flutter over my breasts as he enters my aura deep. his kiss violets my mouth until i quiver with every note he plays with my body.

i took in every inch. you see, i love the feel of two opposites coming together, causing friction. abrasive and refined intertwined. if you're lucky, you both end up gleaming from a thorough polishing.

oh, the spark of the sea that lit his eyes. as he flips me over onto my back, my imagination got the best of me, so i allowed his hands to roam. fingers enveloped my neck. until his art penetrated me in deep. what a masterpiece my mind has painted. to travel back down to my soaking core and push not one but two fingers.

he found that perfect spot. that combination of finger and tongue that made me want to scream and cry and escape, all the while praying that he wouldn't stop. once he found it, he was merciless. it was fucking fabulous.

my toes curl against the sheets, back arching as he continues to finger my pussy once more with his eyes fixed on my face. "good girl. good fucking girl, baby. just like that. just a little more."

"i can't."

"yes, you can, i bet you can. i bet you can cum again for me."

i wrap my holy legs around his heavy head and let his tongue swim toward salvation. he didn't stop. i lost my breath, but he penetrated. harder. deeper. spanked, in circular motions. vibrations. up and down, until sweet nectar dripped around him, like honey.

“jesus,” i cursed, my legs shaking violently on his shoulders coming down from my high. he begins to kiss my core and thighs as he brings my legs down to hover over me.

his expression was serious, but i liked how it softened slightly when he looked at me. like the way he looked at me was different from how he looked at everyone else.

smoothness oozes from him with every kiss he takes towards me, starting from my breasts to my face. i lay in awe until his arms wrap tightly around me. i breathe. this scent he so lustfully carries, it fills the air around me.

tags: @nicksmainbitch @sturniolossss @sturnlova @its-jennarose @freshsturns @luverboychris @tubl-mc @ghostlypineappl @sturnzsblog @sluttformatt @urfavstromboli @junnniiieee07 @bernardsbendystraws @drpepperworshipper @ksturniolo7 @samandcolbyfan22

#sturniolo triplets #matt sturniolo #matthew sturniolo #matt sturniolo x you #matt sturniolo x reader #sturniolo #orangelala

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norrizzandpia · 6 months

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Lacy (Part 2) (Lando’s Ending)

Summary: In which the two soulmates finally get together.

Warnings: language, sexual innuendos at the end, everything’s depressing for a bit

Note: SURPRISE YALL!!!!! I ended up staying home from classes today because I got my period and it hurts so fucking bad 😀 so anyways I took this time to write Lando’s ending and let me tell you THIS EATS so grab the popcorn and the tissues and strap in because this concludes the lacy trilogy 😭

LANDO POV

There’s a specific quiet in the wake of the moment when you realize you had been in love with your best friend for as long as you knew her. It’s a quiet that is not peaceful whatsoever. Rather, it’s a chaotic, loud, and painful quiet which twists your insides and makes you want to smack your head against the nearest wall.

That’s the quiet I experience when Luisinha walks into the room and I find myself wishing it was Y/n.

“We need to break up.” I stutter out, my brain not thinking as it dawns on me the confusion toward the feelings I had for Y/n was anything but that. I never should’ve felt confused because it was right in front of me. My love for her had always been there, lingering in the background as I admired her smile. To think I waited this long and pushed her this far away only to realize I needed her is something indescribable.

Luisinha’s face falls as she sits down beside me on the couch, “What?”

Shaking my head, I look in her eyes, “I’m so sorry, Luisinha, but I think I’m just not ready to be with you right now.”

“Because of her.” Her arms cross over her chest as she tilts her head, “So, when I asked you to choose between me and her, and you chose me, that was… what? Confusion?”

“No, I- It was…” I’m rendered speechless as I try to explain myself, “It was a dick move. I’m sorry. I never should’ve shut her out and I never should’ve treated you the way I did. When you asked me to choose, I hadn’t thought about the fact that she’s always been my best friend and she’s been there for me for longer than you have. This isn’t to say I didn’t love you or adore the time I had with you. It’s just me realizing that I’ve gone so long needing her and that will never change.”

Her somber nodding adds another knife to my heart, the amount tripling by the minute as she takes in another one of my mistakes, “You love her? Be honest this time, Lando. I know I asked you this same question after that night when Max and I found you two close on the Monaco street, but I need to know the truth. No matter how much it hurts. So, tell me. Do you love her?”

Sighing, I come to terms with it all, “Yes, I do. I’m not sure when it happened, but I think it’s always been there.”

“You loved her while you were with me?” Her teary eyes meet mine.

Water wells in my eyes, matching her brokenness, “I’m sorry, Luisinha. Truly, I never knew it for sure until I stopped talking to her after choosing you. If I would’ve known before having met you, I wouldn’t have dragged you into this. I’m regretful of how I handled everything, but I’m not regretful of you. I never will be. I hope you won’t be too.”

She shakes her head, “No, I’m not. It just hurts to know your boyfriend loves someone else and be told it’s not true, that you’re crazy, only to be proven right when he can’t go a second without her.”

I expel a breath, “I’m so shit for this. I don’t know how I’ll ever be able to make it up to you.”

She gets up from the couch, grabbing her bag off the counter and making her way to the door, “I’m not the person you need to make it up to, Lando. You apologized to me, that’s enough. But, Y/n? There’s a lot of groveling needed to fix that fuckup you made.”

—

Walking into the McLaren Garage, I feel hopeful. Hopeful that when I explain the past few months to Y/n, that she’ll understand; hopeful that she’ll let me love her openly; hopeful that she’ll love me again.

The infamous papaya colors comfort me once more as I round the corner, going to the one place I know she’ll be.

Hospitality. Probably making friends with everyone she sees, knowing every soul that catches a glimpse of her is immediately enthralled and obsessed.

Just like I was.

My eyes land on her, in a white sundress that makes my world stop, and a smile graces my face at her laughter. My eyes wander to the person beside her, the one that had conjured the sweet noise out of her, and find Oscar.

My heart drops for a moment, but then plummets to my feet when I see his hand over hers on the table in front of them and her other hand wrapped around his arm as she tips back in her chair, still lost in the laughter. I stop in my tracks, observing their behavior like my life depends on it, trying desperately to figure out the depth of their partnership.

I must be standing for an awkwardly long time because Mark, Oscar’s manager, comes up next to me, a small, pitiful smile on his face as he states, “Weird, yeah? Everyone’s trying to figure out if they’re together or not. Apparently he was the only person she would see after you broke things off with her.”

The air in my lungs renders empty, completely leaving me and the rest of the life left in my body. My eyes dart over them, that comforting hopefulness draining from my being as they continue their conversation like it’s second nature.

I seem to drown in my emotions, not responding to Mark as he nudges me to a secluded corner of a random hallway. His hands on my arms, he dips down to meet me at eye level, “Lando, you need to pull it together. She’s finally getting better, do not ruin that for her. If she sees you fawning over her, that’ll confuse her and all the progress she’s made will go to shit. I’m begging you, do not screw this up.”

My mouth opens and closes as I try to form some sort of sentence, something to describe the crushing pain that has numbed me and taken things from me I never knew could be taken.

“I was going to try and win her back.” I mumble.

He immediately shakes his head, “Absolutely not. If it’s the last thing I say, do not get near her. You cause her unnecessary pain. At least do it for her, Lando. Leave her alone.”

“But, Mark-” I begin, but he’s quick to cut me off.

“No, Lando. Just, no.” At that, he lets go of me and walks off, as if he hadn’t just crushed specific dreams of mine and left them to die a slow death.

Cruelly, in the distance, I hear her laughing again and my heart shatters at my feet.

Knowing she laughs with him now, instead of me?

I will never come back from that.

—

“I tried calling her the other day. She declined it.” Max states, hands running through his hair as he looks at the screen and makes sure we’re muted.

My fingers hover over her contact under the table, but they don’t move to press it, too scared to really know the outcome.

“I do this everyday. It’s torture.”

The chat blows up on the screen as people ask what we’re doin that warrants muting, but both Max and I ignore it.

“Why don’t you just talk to her? I’m sure she wants closure too.” Max tries.

I shake my head, “She wants closure. I just want her.”

Max rolls his eyes, “So, tell her that.”

“She’s with Oscar!” I exclaim, throwing my hands out and confusing the viewers of our stream even more.

“You don’t know that!” He mirrors my position, both of us staring each other down.

Huffing, I shift back in my chair, turning the microphone back on and effectively ending the conversation.

Max eyes me as he vaguely states, “Lando, you don’t know. We both know you don’t know if that is correct or not. All we know is that they’re friends which they always have been.”

Messages from fans asking who we’re talking about, some getting it perfectly right as they suggest we’re talking about the dating rumors between Oscar and Y/n.

“I don’t want to talk about this with you anymore.” I dish out, tension arising in the room at my aggressive tone.

“Yeah, because we both know I’m right.” He smirks as if my feelings and this situation are entertaining.

“Fuck off, Max. I’m serious.”

Patting my back, he gentles his choice of words, “I know, mate. I know.”

—

MAX F POV

Knocking on her door, I clutch the chocolates in my hand in a death grip. I’m so nervous to see her, nervous that she’ll shut me out and never forgive me.

My mind’s loud and messy as the lock clicks and the wooden slab opens slightly, Y/n’s face peeking through.

When she catches sight of me, her fingers begin to push the door shut again, but my foot is quicker as it wedges in between it.

“Max,” She starts exasperatingly, “I’m not interested in talking to you.”

I nod my head, “I know, I know, but just hear me out, Y/n. You’re my best friend. Please.”

My pleading seems to work as she sighs and then opens her door, gesturing for me to come in. The foyer looks different and I’m not sure why until I realize it's because, whenever I would come over, I would see something of Lando’s strewn on the floor or bench. However, the only papaya I see now is a jacket which has Oscar’s name on it.

She seems to catch what my eyes have landed on, “He’s not here. He forgot that last night.”

My eyebrows rise, looking at her questionably, “Oh?”

She rolls her eyes, “Don’t push it, Max.”

Nodding, I follow her further into the house, still feeling weird that Lando’s presence isn’t blaring like it had been months ago. When we reach the kitchen, she sits down on one of the stools, moving the one beside her further out for me to take place in.

“Let’s settle this like adults then, yeah?” She gives a light smile, restoring hope inside me that she’ll give thought to my redemption.

Once I’m settled, I look her in the eyes and recite what I had practiced in the car, “I am so incredibly sorry for not being the true friend I should’ve been during the Lando situation. I should’ve been there for you, should’ve stood up for you and I never should’ve gone along with him and Luisinha pushing you out of the group. There’s only a few things I regret in life and this is absolutely one of them, the worst one by far. You have been nothing, but the greatest person to me ever since Lando introduced us. I should’ve met you with the same behavior, same loyalty, and I always said I would when it was needed, but when the situation arose, I fucking failed you miserably. You never deserved anything that was shoved in your face and I am so sorry I sat on the sidelines, letting it happen. Y/n, I miss you. I miss my best friend and I’m asking you to forgive me because I won’t fucking screw this up again.”

Her tears strike something in me, something protective as I pull her into a hug.

Her tears wet my shirt as she says, “Yeah, I didn’t fucking deserve any of that. You both were so shitty to me. I never did anything to you.”

I nod, running a hand over her back, “I know, I know. And I’m so fucking sorry.”

She pulls away, rubbing away her tears, “It’s not even you that hurt me the most. It’s Lando. I gave him everything and he still threw me to the fucking curb when it was most convienant for him. I hate him so fucking much, Max.”

I know what she says is false because I can see it in her eyes how much she yearns for him to tell her everything they’ve been tiptoeing around their whole lives. I see it in the way she doesn’t seek comfort in me, but in him, and I see it in the way she forgives me so quickly because the love she holds for me will never be as great as the love she will always hold for him.

“You don’t mean that.”

She stands up, frustrated, “Yes, I do!”

Walking over to her and grabbing her wrists, forcing her eyes to meet mine, I said pointedly, “No, you don’t.”

her resolve breaks completely and the tears wrack her body. Falling into me, she cries, “No, I don’t.”

—

LANDO POV

Seeing her standing below the podiums, in the crowd, cheering in her papaya colors is a type of pain I will always remember because I know she isn’t cheering for me.

She’s cheering for the man standing beside me, the man standing on the third place podium with a trophy in his hands as the Australian flag waves on the screen behind him.

P1 should feel better than this, but it proves to feel like absolute shit as the one thing I truly want isn’t even here to support me. The celebration is frantic and quick as I will myself to hold back the tears trying so hard to break free especially when Oscar leans over the railing to smile down at her, waving, as she screams louder, giving him the same smile she had given me multiple times when I was in the same position.

I watch her watch him, her eyes gleaming with pride. It’s hard to see her forget about me, shut out memories of her cheering for me when she probably gets Deja vu as she does the same thing for someone else.

For months, I’ve tried to mold myself into something she would miss, show only parts of myself on social media that would specifically call out to her, but, still, I’ve come up empty.

I’m bitter as we step back into McLaren’s headquarters on the paddock, and when Oscar tries to congratulate me, I dismiss him harshly. Shoving his hand off my shoulder and storming off to my room, wanting quiet, but not the quiet that only holds memories of her and all we could’ve been.

I’m with my thoughts for a few moments until there’s a small knock on my door. Standing up and going to open it, I’m about to tell off whoever has come to disturb my own personal hell, but when I catch a glimpse of her y/h/c hair, I’m quick to shut my mouth.

“I came to congratulate you.” She says, her voice quiet and unassuming.

There are tears in her eyes as she says, “I know we haven’t spoken, but I also know how much your first win means to you. I know how great you're probably feeling and I don’t want to disrupt that, but I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I didn’t tell you how proud of you I am.”

My voice quivers as my eyes go blurry, tears building up in them, “You think I feel good? You think I’m happy?”

Her nodding has me shaking my head, “No, Y/n, I’m not. I haven’t been since we stopped talking. This isn’t fun. Seeing you cheer for him, seeing you laugh at his jokes and stay by his side. None of this makes this win what we both thought it would be. This win will only be everything we chalked it up to be if you would listen to what I have to tell you.”

Her eyebrows furrow, “Lando, you stopped talking to me. You almost told me you loved me and then, the next day, just went fucking silent.”

I nod, “I know and I’m sorry, but she made me choose.”

Her eyes widened, “Luisinha made you choose between us and you chose her? Well, that’s fucking perfect, Lando!”

I shake my head vigorously, “No! Fuck. No, Y/n. That’s not how I meant it to sound.”

She puts her hands on her hips, jutting it out, and, usually, I’d laugh at the sassy pose, but, now, it just makes me want to hold her and kiss her, tell her how much I’ve loved her all this time.

“How’d you mean it to sound then, Lando?”

Groaning, I threw my hands out beside me, “I meant that, yes, I chose her, but after a few days, I realized that was a stupid decision because…” My eyes meet hers as I yell, “Because I fucking love you! I’m in love with you! I always have been. There has never been a time where I didn’t have the overwhelming need to have you be mine and I was just so confused by that feeling that I only realized it when you were gone. I broke up with Luisinha the second I figured my shit out and ever since then I’ve had to endure your happiness with Oscar! I’m so sorry for everything I put you through and the hurt I enabled that you never deserved, but it’s bull-fucking-shit, Y/n. I was going to do everything in my power to win you back and, not just as a friend this time, win you back, so we could finally be what we’ve always wanted to be. But, no! Just when I allowed myself to lean into the feelings I have for you, you got with Oscar and I’ve had to deal with the fact that I lost you to him this whole time. It’s worse than hell, Y/n. It’s worse than anything I’ve ever felt in my entire life.”

Her body visibly tenses, “Are you fucking kidding me, Lando?! Oscar and I aren’t together!”

My mind goes quiet, “What?”

She scoffs, “We were never together! He was helping me get over you! Which proved to be hard because I haven’t yet.”

I shake my head, utter annoyance at my own stupidity, “So, that was never a thing?”

She throws her head back, “Oh my fucking god, Lando, if I didn’t love you, I’d kill you. No, we were never a thing. Oscar was just the one friend I had during the dark part of my life where I tried to move on from you.”

My jaw dropped as I looked at her, my brain trying to form some kind of response, “I’m so sorry, Y/n.”

She nods, “Yeah, you fucking should be. You took so long to realize your feelings for me and then took longer because you read into something that always has been and always will be platonic.”

I drop my head down, but it’s moved up when her hands cup my chin and force my eyes to meet hers, “Lan, why’d you make it so complicated?”

Shaking my head, I exhale, “Because my feelings for you are complicated.”

She smiles lightly, “No, they aren’t.”

I mirror her smile, “No, they aren’t. They’re as clear as day. I love you.”

Her giggling restores the life into my body I lost all that time ago, “Say it again,”

Her wish is my command, always, “I love you.”

I continue to say it softly as I lean down, my hands winding around her hips and pulling her into me as I kiss her. Our first kiss seems to be the best one I’ve ever experienced as her touch glides across my neck and my hands grip the skin of her back after having pushed their way under her shirt. It’s soft and slow, representing the love we found between us. When she pulls away, her face millimeters away from mine, she asks, “Does this make your first race win everything you thought it would be?”

I chuckle, kissing her once more before pulling her into my room and shutting the door, “Yes, but I have an idea of how you could make it even better.”

Her eyebrows rise as my hands begin to move her shirt up and off her body, “Yeah?”

Taking in the start of her bare, gorgeous body, I nod slowly, smirking mischievously, “Oh, yeah.”

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allysunny · 5 months

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Guiding Lights | Nanami Kento x Fem!Reader

Synopsys: Nanami barely acknowledges you once he gets home. It's late and you've been waiting for hours. Again. Lately, it's all you seem to do for your husband. Wait, while he arrives home later and later. You decide to confront him about it, and things escalate.

Words: 6.5k

Warnings: Angst, heavy angst. Like, super angsty. Arguments and yelling, mentions of cheating, neglect and death. A very tired Nanami who's overworking himself. Angst with comfort, angst to fluff. Very happy and cheesy ending. Hopefully not OOC Nanami. Do let me know if I forgot something!

A/N: Hey guys!!! Oh my god I have been working on this fic for quite a while hahaha! I started it a few months ago, but then you guys started sending in your (lovely) requests, and it sort of got lost in my drafts. But I really wanted to get it done, so I focused on it again. Also, I'm terrible at summaries, I'm so sorry!! </3

I think this is my Magnum Opus so far. I really like how it turned out. I love my man Nanami, and I love angst (lol obviously), and I've always thought about this specific scenario. This is sort of like, the fic I've always wanted to read, you know? A "fine, I'll do it myself" fic, if you will, hahaha!

Well, I hope you enjoy reading it!! I certainly had a blast writing it <3

The door to your apartment closed as softly as it opened, and if you weren’t so intent on confronting the man who had just walked through it, you wouldn’t have heard the sound.

Looking up from the show you were watching and just paused, you take your husband in. He’s clearly seen better days. Shirt and tie slightly dishevelled, hair askew, large bags under his tired eyes. There is a big cut ripping his suit, and a smaller one on his jaw.

“I’m home.” Nanami mumbled, taking said jacket off and placing it on top of the couch.

“Hey,” You replied, unsure of what exactly to say. You’d been awake for hours now, patiently waiting for him to come back, but now that he’s standing in front of you, you don’t know what to tell him.

You must’ve not thought things through, because instead of keeping quiet and letting this man enjoy some peace and quiet (something he seemed to lack), you decide to speak your mind.

“You’re late.”

Nanami sighed. He does not dare to meet your eye, instead making his way towards your kitchen to pour himself a glass of water. “There was a curse that needed to be exorcised. I was closer to the location, so they sent me.”

“You could’ve called.” He hadn’t even kissed you. Just walked straight to the kitchen, barely acknowledging you. “I was worried.”

“Well, I was busy.” Nanami put his glass down and rubbed his forehead. He looked drained. The sharp edges of his face look like they could cut your fingers, should you touch him. The exhaustion was piling over him, and it was clear to see.

You didn’t wish to push his buttons – God knows how hard his work as a Jujutsu Sorcerer was. But it’s not fair for him to leave for hours on end without telling you his location. You don’t want to control him, nor keep tabs on him all the time; you just want to make sure he is safe and doing okay.

You just want to make sure your husband will return to you and your son at the end of the day.

“And you couldn’t have spared me a minute? Just a text would’ve been fine.” You said, standing up and walking to him. Too busy to call? It would take him less than a minute to tell you he was safe.

“[Y/N], I didn’t have the time to call you.” Now he looked at you. Those beautiful hazel eyes which usually regarded you with affection and care, looked fatigued and weary. These eyes belong to a man who has seen too much, a man who is in desperate need of rest. But no matter how much you tried to coerce him into taking a break, he wouldn’t have any of it.

Ever since you had your son, he was more intent than ever on working and making sure curses were exorcised as soon as they appeared. All to keep your bundle of joy safe, to make sure he grew up in a better world. But lately, it seemed like he was stretching himself too thin, taking on every single mission, arriving home later and later.

“I was worried sick. You look hurt.” Nanami looked away once more when you approached him. Just as you were about to raise your hand and inspect his jaw, he turned away from you.

“I’m fine. You should go to sleep. It’s late.” His voice was almost devoid of any emotion. Is this what Jujutsu Sorcery did to people? Wear them down, strip them of their humanity and emotions until they were but a vessel of what they had once been?

When you first started dating, Nanami couldn’t get enough of you. He’d get home on time, every single day, just so he wouldn’t keep you waiting. He’d treat you like you were precious, because to him, you were. And now it seemed like he was perpetually tired, like there was something holding him back from the sweet man he had once been. You suspected he hadn’t held your son in a few days. Nanami always stopped by Haibara’s room before he went to sleep, just to watch his slow breathing and make sure all was well. But it had been weeks since you had seen him hold his child.

“Kento, you’re not fine. Just… Stop pushing me away. Please.” You reached out to touch his arm, and he shakes it away.

“Look, I appreciate your concern, but it’s just a scratch. I’ve had worse.” How could he be so careless about his health? Was he not aware of the family waiting for him at home?

You shake your head. You really didn’t want to do this. Not today. Not now. You’re tired – Haibara had been fussy all day, asking for “papa”, and there was nothing you could do to soothe him. And your husband looked tired too. Let’s not do this today. Not now. Go to bed, you thought. Go to bed.

Unfortunately, your mouth was quicker.

“Oh, yeah? Well, when’s it gonna be enough?” You questioned, crossing your arms over your chest. “It’s just a scratch. Well, yesterday was just a scratch as well. So was the day before. And the day before that. Is tomorrow going to be just a scratch as well?” Your voice was rising, and you were fighting hard to keep the tears away. “It’s always justa scratch. When is it going to be enough for you to stop? When’s it going to stop being just a scratch? Huh? When you break an arm?”

“[Y/N].”

“When you lose a limb?”

“[Y/N].”

“When you lose your life?!” You tightened the grip you had around your body, using your arms as a shield against the despair and hopelessness you felt. You seemed to have stunned your husband into silence. Nanami breathed softly, looking at the floor. “When is it going to be enough for you?”

“I’m doing this for your sake.” He mumbled softly.

“Maybe you were, once. But not anymore. No, you’re doing this for yourself.”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.” Now it was your husband’s turn to raise his voice ever so slightly. His fists were clenched by his side, and his shoulders moved in sync with his breathing. “I’m out there, every night, doing this for you. For our son, for our family.”

“No, you’re not!”

“Yes, I am! If I’m out there, exorcising those disgusting creatures, it’s because I want our son to grow up in a safer world! I don’t want him to live in fear, I want him to be safe. And that’s exactly what I do.”

“You say you care about your son, but you haven’t seen him in days.” You scoffed and shook your head. How could he say such things when you knew damn well he hadn’t even seen him? Let alone hold him or play with him. And the lack of attention from his father was clearly taking a toll on Haibara, who cried and cried, eyes anxiously looking for the tall figure he learned to associate with comfort. Not that he didn’t like you - you were his mother, and arguably, the only person he truly knew, but a baby boy needs his father, and Haibara didn’t seem to have his.

You stare at your husband, noticing how time has changed him. The once gentle features have turned knifelike, his eyebags have become wide and deep, his eyes perpetually tired behind the fatiguing-looking glasses. What could possibly be more important than his family?

An unsettling feeling starts pooling in your stomach. You’ve tried not to entertain this idea for long - hell, you couldn’t think about it without becoming nauseous. Because he would never, would he? He’s your husband. The father of your child. Meeting another woman behind your back is clearly unthinkable, right?

The voice in your head that you’ve been trying to quiet down this whole time gets louder and louder. Ask him, it says, ask him and find out the truth. You deserve to know it, you’re his wife. What if he’s hiding something? Ask him.

You want to trust your husband. You really do. You love him and always have and always will. But your mind is playing tricks on you, the weariness of the day and lack of comfort from this very same man messing with your brain.

“Is it someone else?” You ask, feeling braver than you felt.

“What!?” he looked at you, eyes wide in surprise. As if what you’d ask was completely preposterous (to him, it was).

“Have you been seeing someone else, Kento? Is that why you’re not home?” You were sounding surprisingly calm for a woman accusing her husband of cheating on her.

Your husband shook his head vigorously, looking you in the eye.

“I’m not. I haven’t been seeing anyone else.” You got a glimpse at your Nanami, the one who’s caring and sweet, the one who holds you when you cry and talks softly when you’re overwhelmed. You see him right now, in the way he assures you there’s no one else.

“You’re not home. You arrive late, leave at the crack of dawn. Don’t hold our son, don’t touch me. Is this why? Do you have someone else? Do you love someone else?”

“[Y/N], I told you, there is no one else. I’m not seeing anyone,” he sighed, signalling his own exhaustion (as if it wasn’t evident by the way it clung to his face, body, and soul). “I’ve just been busy.” Nanami repeated, turning away from you, to place his glass in the sink.

“Too busy to see your own son?”

“I told you, I’ve been busy, [Y/N].”

“He’s your son!”

“This is my job - “

“We’re your family!”

“Well, you can’t expect me to stay home all the time and cater to your every whim, can you?” Nanami had never yelled. Never in your time together you’d heard him raise his voice at anyone, let alone you. But the man before you couldn’t be your husband because he’d done just that.

“I’m not asking you to stay home and cater to my every whim!” Tears clouded your vision, and you stuttered pathetically, still trying to hold your ground. “I’m just asking you to be more considerate!” The more you spoke, the more you stuttered, the more your tears fell. Nanami, your sweet Nanami, your caring and loving husband would’ve never allowed this years ago. He’d have embraced you and kissed your forehead and wiped your tears. The man before you has no intention of doing that.

“I have a job to do, [Y/N], I have a duty, I made a promise -”

“You made a promise to me when we got married!” You wiped your tears away. Or tried to - they wouldn’t stop coming, big lousy tears that ran down your cheeks and made you feel even more miserable. “You made a promise to our son when he was born! And now look at you - you haven’t held him in days!”

“He’s a baby, [Y/N]. He won’t die from lack of affection from me. God damn it, he won’t even remember it! You’re making a big deal out of nothing!”

“You say that because you don’t spend time with him! I’m not making a big deal out of nothing; I’m telling you you’re neglecting your son!”

“[Y/N], he’s a baby!”

“He misses his father!” Now it was you yelling, sleep and rest long forgotten. No, right now, all you wanted was to get to the bottom of this, to once and for all make your husband see reason. “He cries for you because he misses you! I miss you! Your family misses you terribly and all you’re doing is pushing us away!”

An ear-piercing cry erupted from the monitor next to you. Hell, you probably didn’t even need the monitor. Haibara’s cries were loud and heart wrenching, and you snapped out of your rage fuelled trance as soon as you heard them.

“Haibara,” you whispered, pushing past your husband and all but flying upstairs. You opened the door to your son’s nursery, and maternal instinct took over as you made your way towards his crib and picked him up. His tiny fists were clenched, and he waved his arms and legs around, crying his little heart out.

“Shhhh, shhhh…” You cooed softly, taking him in your arms and pressing soft kisses against his forehead. “Mommy’s sorry, my love… Mommy was yelling, wasn’t she? She’s sorry… It won’t happen again my darling, I promise… I’m so sorry…” You cried, cradling his little body against yours.

Upon hearing your voice, his cries subsided, and the baby looked up at you with teary eyes, hands coming up to touch your wet cheeks.

“Mama?” He asked in that tiny voice of his.

“Yes, my love, mama’s right here. I’m sorry. Mama was yelling, it must’ve been so scary.” You wiped his tears, kissing the top of his head.

“Mama,” he said again, tapping his hands on your face once more, as if making sure you were there.

“Yes baby, mama’s here. Mama’s right here.”

“Papa?” Haibara looked around, and his lips turned into a pout once more. “Papa?”

“I’m sorry, my love. Papa’s busy. He’s working hard to keep us safe,” Please don’t cry again, you thought, go to sleep baby, just go to sleep. Mommy needs rest too, especially after today.

“Papa? Papa?” His cries became more insistent, and you tried your best not to burst into tears again. You felt like a failure. A failure of a wife, a failure of a mother. You felt like the home you tried too hard to build and cherish and fill with love was crumbling apart.

“Go to sleep baby, okay? Papa’s busy, but he’ll see you some other time. Right now, he needs to rest because he’s been working so hard… And so do you, baby. Just get some rest, alright? Please.”

You sniffled a few times, singing and talking to him slowly, the way you knew calmed him down. “I’m so sorry for yelling honey, so, so sorry… It won’t happen again… How scary it must’ve been for you… It’s alright now, see? Mommy’s here, she won’t yell anymore…”

You rocked Haibara and placed him so he was lying down in your arms. He looked at you first with a confused gaze, then with a small smile, and finally with a sleepy expression. Your sweet baby boy, who was all furrowed brown and blonde locks of hair, exactly like his father. Your sweet, sweet son, who’d babble in excitement when you twirled him around the living room and danced around as soft music played and knocked his head against yours in a loving gesture. He was your one weakness. You’d do anything for him.

The love you have for this child is stronger than words can communicate, and you wonder how Nanami can possibly ignore him as easily as he does.

You rocked Haibara some more, humming a tune you knew he liked. Once you turned around, you spotted Nanami leaning against the door, staring at the both of you in a mix of awe, hurt and sadness.

You returned his gaze, unsure of what to say.

What even was there to say?

The life you’d so lovingly built for yourselves seemed to have come crashing down, until all that was left were broken pieces.

Nanami approached you two, with slow heavy steps. Once you managed to get a good look at his face, something inside you broke.

Nanami was crying.

Big, silent tears rolled down his cleverly sculpted cheeks, and his eyes drifted to the sleepy baby in your arms.

And then he did something neither of you were expecting.

He sobbed.

Loudly.

So loud, little Haibara stirred in your arms, looking over to the source of the sound.

His face twisted in confusion, and his pouty lips parted to utter a single word.

“Papa,” he babbled, hand pointing in his direction. “Papa. Papa. Papa.” Haibara mumbled over and over again, arms flailing in Nanami’s direction. He twisted his whole body, muttering “Papa” and whining loudly.

“Haibara,” Nanami whispered, hands coming up to cradle his son - an adorable sight, really. Your husband, with his big, strong hands, handling a tiny baby with the utmost care. He held Haibara straight, and cried once the baby knocked his head against his, gurgling in excitement and flailing his arms around.

“Papa!” If your son was or had been sleepy, he didn’t show it, instead babbling a single word repeatedly, hands either coming up to touch his father’s face, waving around, or clapping. “Papa!”

You wondered how long it had been since Nanami had held him. It was clear Haibara missed him, and although the sight before you was heartwarming, it still hurt that, for this to happen, Nanami had to ignore his child.

“My son,” Nanami cradled Haibara carefully, leaning his forehead against the baby’s. “My sweet, sweet son. I have been such an idiot. I’m so sorry…” He kept on sobbing, kissing Haibara all over his face, head, and hands, as if trying to convey his regret in some way. “I’ve failed you. I’m so sorry.”

It was both heartbreaking and heart enriching. There he was, your husband, finally holding his son, finally apologising, finally making amends. You knew him to be telling the truth. Nanami might be stoic and cold on the outside, but you got to him. You knew him, inside and out. You could tell when he was genuine, and, well, he’d never been more genuine than now.

Nanami turned to look at you, eyes still puffy from the tears. He shook his head once, then twice, then turned to face his son once again.

“I’m so sorry… I’ve been neglecting you all this time… My family, my own family… I promised to take care of you…” This confession only made him sob louder. Your son quickly picked up on the atmosphere because he too started pouting, and expressing his discomfort through sounds.

“Oh -” Nanami was quick to change the baby’s position, making him lie down on his arms. “Shhh, it’s okay. Everything’s fine now, alright? Why don’t you go to sleep and give your mother some rest?”

“Papa,” Haibara blinked his eyes once and reached up to touch his father’s face. Nanami smiled, holding his son’s little hand in his, pressing a soft kiss against it.

“That’s right. Papa. Papa’s here.”

“Pa - pa,” Your son was interrupted by a big yawn. He blinked at his father once again, and quickly turned around, snuggling against his arms and chest.

There was something about tall and strong 7 to 3 sorcerer Nanami Kento melt while holding a tiny baby in his arms that made you chuckle. You wiped your tears and watched as your husband kissed your son’s forehead one last time, before putting him down on his crib once again.

Nanami made sure to check Haibara’s crib, gazing at him with that adoring look in his eyes, before exiting the room. You did the same and did not need to be told twice - you followed your husband, who was already in your shared bedroom, sitting on his side of the bed and facing the wall.

Leaning against the doorframe, you stared at him.

None of you wanted to break the small bubble you’d been immersed in. Although you hadn’t spoken with each other, the last few minutes with Haibara had spoken volumes. It was as if the ocean of hurt and neglect had been breached by the child who was a careful mix of the two.

And yet, it still hurt to address the elephant in the room.

You’d hated yelling at Nanami. You’d never done it. And he’d never yelled at you. Not even towards his most eccentric and insufferable coworkers, Nanami dared to yell. He believed arguments and misunderstandings could be solved without raising one’s voice. But he’d gone and done the one thing he promised never to do.

It was Nanami who, after what seemed like an eternity, reached across the ocean.

“I’ve lost my focus,” he said, still staring at the wall. “I’ve gone and ruined the one good thing in my life.”

All you could do was listen. You’d waited too long to hear these words.

“The truth is, I’m scared.” There it was again, that vulnerability in his voice, that softness and truth that reminded you your sweet husband too was human. “I’ve been scared ever since Haibara was born. I want to make the world a better place for him. I don’t want him to grow up surrounded by curses, always looking over his shoulder in fear…” He clenched his fists, only this time, the anger wasn’t directed towards you.

“I thought if only I worked hard… If only I worked all these extra hours, I'd be making a difference. I’d be protecting my family.”

You had no control over your body, but it didn’t matter. Your heart would always follow Nanami Kento, and right now, it was telling you to go to him. You stood near the bed, just a few feet away from his sitting figure.

“You are protecting your family,” you said, just as softly as him.

“No - no, I’m not. What if something happens while I’m gone? What if I’m not home, and someone gets to you first?” Nanami sighed, voice laced with fear. You could tell he was close to tears once again. “I’ve been so busy trying to take on each and every mission, I forgot to protect my family in the most important way - next to them.”

You remained silent.

There was nothing you could come up with. He was right. Those were your words and your thoughts. Then why was it that when they were finally uttered, you felt sadness rather than happiness or relief? It pained to see your husband hurting.

You sat down next to him, and placed a hand on his shoulder, an encouraging gesture.

“I miss you…” he continued, tears now running freely. “I miss you two so much… Haibara… Haibara’s growing up without a father… And it’s all my fault…” Hunching over his knees, Nanami took his face in his hands, crying silently. “And you, my love - you’ve been here all this time, working so hard to keep our family together, and I was too blind to appreciate it… I’m so sorry…”

He then looked at you, and you saw years of your relationship fly by.

In his eyes, you saw your first meeting. You saw the day he bought you coffee for the first time. Satoru playing matchmaker. You saw your first date, full of nervousness and a fleeting kiss that lasted no longer than a few seconds but was enough to leave you both flustered and breathless. You saw the day he asked you to be his girlfriend, a bouquet of bright pink camelias in his hand. Him holding you close after you’d loved each other for the first time, hands tracing patterns on your back, whispering words of appreciation and love in your ear.

You saw your wedding day, the first dance you two shared and how he smiled like a fool despite all the teasing from Satoru and his students. You saw him carry box after box, unpacking items and decorating what would later become your loving home. You saw the way he cried in your arms when you showed him the positive pregnancy test, and how he kneeled before you to kiss your stomach.

You saw him holding your hair back while you puked, always so attentive, making sure you were fine. Him massaging your feet, rubbing your legs and preparing you meals according to your cravings. You saw him hold Haibara for the first time, hazel eyes ever the softest. You saw him sleep with your baby the first few weeks to ensure you had enough rest.

You watched as he got up earlier and earlier each morning, some of them even going as far as to forget to kiss you goodbye. You saw him arrive later and later, claiming he was “too tired” to eat with you, “too busy” to see your son.

You saw all of this in a span of just a few seconds. You saw all the love, the regret, the hurt, the pain, the happiness and desire, all of it. You saw the life you had carved together, the house decorated to your and his liking, the way it just felt like home, and lately felt like anything but.

Nanami left the bed and knelt before you, eyes still watery.

“I’m so sorry,” he started. “I’ve been a neglectful husband. I’ve been taking you and our son for granted.” Slowly, he took your hands in his. You allow him, having missed his warmth, his comfort. “Will you forgive me?”

That was the question.

Would you?

Could you?

“You don’t have to answer me right now,” he shook his head, thumbs circling your palms affectionately. “You can take all the time you want. You can think about it, make me suffer all you want - hell, I deserve it, after all that I put you through. Just… think about it. Please. Even if you never forgive me, just know that I am so, so sorry for all the suffering I caused you. I’ve been such a terrible husband…”

HIs cries don’t seem to subside, and he lays his head on top of your hands.

It breaks you to see your husband like this. No matter how much you were hurting, no matter how much you missed him and his absence broke you inside, you never wanted to see him hurting.

Instinctively, your hands flew to his hair, caressing it softly, massaging his scalp like you always did during lazy Saturday mornings, when he’s clingy and needy after having worshiped your body thoroughly, or during Sunday afternoons, when you watched your son play with his toys in the garden.

Nanami’s shoulders sagged, and he rested his head fully on your legs.

You think about what he said.

Forgiveness.

Could you ever forgive you husband after all the pain he’s caused?

After the late nights spent with dread, fearing the worst, after the early mornings devoid of any affection and love, after the distant weekends and inexistent holidays?

But even as you thought this over, your heart had already decided for you.

You’d walk to the end of the earth for Nanami Kento. And you were sure he’d do the same.

Delicate hands are placed on the sides of his face, and your husband looked up, a pained expression in his eyes.

“I love you,” you whispered, hoping that somehow, someway, these three little words would convey just how deep your adoration for this man goes. “Of course I’ll forgive you, Kento.”

His chocolate brown eyes seem to sparkle, and he holds his head higher.

“What?”

“I love you. We can fix this. I know we can.”

“Yes - [Y/N], yes. We can. I can. I will. I promise you.” Kento placed his hands on top of yours, holding them gently. After all, he’s holding the entire world in his hands.

And although you just want to skip to the good part, you shake your head, interrupting him before he can get too excited.

“But,” you began, “You need to change. This needs to change, Kento. I… I can’t raise a child on my own. I can’t nurture a home all by myself.”

“Yes - yes, you’re right. My love, I’m so sorry.”

“I won’t ask you to give up Jujutsu Sorcery.”

At this, he seems to tense a bit. You knew how important your husband’s job was to him. After all, he was keeping people safe, making the world a better place. It was terrifying, but it made him happy, and that’s all you could ask for.

“Just… Be more careful.” These words are uttered with the utmost softness, in fear of breaking the little trance you were in. “You have a wife waiting at home for you. A son. Your family needs you. And I know you’re making a difference out there, but we also need you here. With us.”

“And if some day, you do end up working overtime, just… Please say something. Just to let me know. I don’t want to know your whereabouts all the time, I don’t want to control you. I just need to know you’re safe.”

Nanami nodded. Eagerly. It was as if you’d just told him you would gift him his weight in gold three times. In fact, you’d given him something better than that. Your love. Your forgiveness. To Nanami, getting you back, winning your trust again, that’s what truly mattered.

“Thank you.” He kissed your hands. “I will. I promise, I’ll change. I’ll be a better husband for you, and a better father to Haibara. My love… My sweet wife, the love of my life… I can’t believe I took you for granted. I was so worried about failing you, I forgot what was truly important. My family.”

“Kento,” you said, shaking your head. Your eyes filled with tears once again. “You have never disappointed us. You will never fail us.”

“If I didn’t work hard enough to clear the world of curses, I would. If I don’t make a difference, I’m letting you two down. I want to protect you. I don’t want to lose you like I lost…” Nanami was unable to finish his sentence. You knew he still felt responsible for the death of his friend. Too responsible. When you suggested naming your son after his best friend, he’d choked up and cried. It is a beautiful tribute, he’d tell you later. “I don’t want to disappoint you.”

“Nonsense.” You spread your legs and pulled him by his face. Nanami quickly got the hint and stood in between them, facing you directly. “You are making a difference, Nanami Kento. You’re making the world a better place. Haibara and I are so proud of you.”

Nanami wept, and you wept with him. He leaned his forehead against yours, and you cried together, not sure of where his tears ended and yours began. You closed your eyes, hands still on his cheeks.

“I’ve been such a terrible husband. Such a terrible father.”

“It will get better. Promise me you will be better.”

“I will. I promise. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

“It’s in the past now, Kento. Let’s focus on the future. Please.”

“I’ll make it better. Cross my heart, [Y/N], I will. I’ll start right damn now, by doing something I haven’t done in a long time.”

Nanami took your chin in his hand, angling you towards him. Then, he leaned forward, kissing you softly. You let out a noise of contentment and kissed him back, hands pulling his face impossibly closer. It’d been a while since he’d touched you, let alone kissed you. You missed this. You missed him.

You kissed him with the hunger of a starved woman, and he kissed you with all the regret he had. You poured all your sorrow into this kiss, while he tried to communicate just how much he loved you. Your tongues moved in sync, and the kiss felt like home.

When you eventually parted for air, Nanami opened his eyes, taking you in. Eyes red from the tears, cheeks puffy, lips plump and swollen. He hated seeing you in pain but thought himself deserving of torture for making you suffer this much.

“I missed you,” he whispered, kissing your lips again, this time quicker.

“I missed you too,” you replied with what looked like a hint of a smile. You hadn’t smiled in a while. Nanami knew this and chastised himself mentally. Never again would you suffer like him. And never again would he be the cause of your pain.

“I’m taking the rest of the week off,” he mumbled, staring into your eyes. He’d almost forgotten how they had the loveliest of colours. In fact, they’d become his favourite shade. Waking up to those gorgeous eyes of yours had once been his greatest joy in life. He would make sure to make it a priority once again. “Damn it, I’ll take the whole month off. We’ll spend some time together. Just you, me, and Haibara. How does that sound?”

You giggled. And how lovely was the sound of your laughter.

“That sounds perfect. I’d love that very much. I think Haibara would too.”

“Yeah? You think so?”

“I know so. He’s been missing you too much. I’m sure he’ll be delighted to spend some time with Papa.”

“Well, I am ecstatic to spend some time with my little one. And my beautiful wife as well.” This one earned a bigger smile from you, and you wrapped your arms around his neck, crashing your lips onto his with vigour.

Nanami chuckled against your lips, and parted from you, getting up and extending his hand towards you. When you cast him a confused look, he nudged his head towards the en-suite bathroom.

“I need to wash the day off me. Will you join me? Please?”

And how could you refuse when he asked you so nicely?

The bath was by far the most relaxing time you��d had the past few months. You sat with your back against Nanami’s chest, and felt the tension leave your body as he lovingly massaged your shoulders and back, placing kisses along the line of your neck.

You washed his hair, massaging his scalp and putting his hair up in all sorts of weird shapes, earning a few smiles from him.

You kissed him with slow languid kisses, caressing his jaw, shedding a few tears of happiness, sadness, sorrow. He replied tenfold, whispering words of adoration against your lips.

It wasn’t sexual or lustful.

It was caring, slow, loving. It was a man showering his life with love, showing her he cared, showing her he loved and cherished her, and would never again take her for granted.

Once you two had rinsed off and dried yourselves with towels, Nanami gently applied body lotion in your body, kissing the spots he’d covered in hydrating cream.

“You smell nice,” he mumbled against his skin.

He carried you to bed, lying you down and scooting over to you. How you’d missed being held by the man you loved. How you’d missed his weight next to yours, his arms around your waist, pulling you close. You turned to him, nuzzling his torso with your nose, placing your hand on top of his chest. You could feel his heartbeat and relished in it. It meant he was alive. He wasn’t dead in some ditch, all alone and away from his family. He was right there next to you, safe and sound.

“I’m sorry for getting lost.” You heard Nanami whisper a few moments later, when the world is quiet and dark, when you two were the only souls still awake.

“You’re back now. You came back to us. Thank you for coming back.” You kissed his pectoral, and he kissed your forehead. An exchange.

“I won’t get lost again. I promise. Not as long as I have you to guide me. You’re my light, [Y/N]. My guiding light. You and Haibara. I love you two so, so much. I would do anything for you. My family.”

“We love you too. We’re so glad you’re back.”

“And I’m here to stay. I really am. Tomorrow’s going to be all about you two, I promise. I’m sorry I yelled. I’m sorry I said Haibara wouldn’t remember. I wasn’t thinking straight. I was tired. I know that’s not really an excuse, but I promise to make up for that behaviour.”

This is what you loved most about your husband. He was down to earth. He recognised his flaws and worked on them. Whenever he made a mistake, he made sure to apologize for it. Your arguments in the past (although small and dumb compared to today) had never gone unresolved, with calmness and willingness to listen from both parties. You could count on your husband to be the respectful diplomat.

You looked up at him. He had his brows furrowed, the way he always did when he was thinking, the way you’d seen your son do once or twice. He was the spitting image of his father.

“I know,” you said, caressing his jaw. “I’m sorry too. For yelling. For saying all those things. Saying you didn’t care about us. I know you do. You’ve been busy, but –“

“No.” Nanami interrupted you. “Don’t that. Don’t say it’s not my fault. I appreciate your apology, and I understand what you mean. But you were right. I mean, I do care. You know I do. But I lost sight of what truly mattered.” The cadence of his voice soothed you, and your eyes got heavier as each second went by.

“I was actually going to say, ‘You’ve been busy, but that’s no excuse to brush off your family’. Oh no, Mister, you aren’t getting off the hook so easily.”

Nanami chuckled and kissed your forehead once again.

“You’d never let me, I know.”

A few silent moments went by, with only the sounds of your and Nanami’s soft breathings signalling your presence.

“[Y/N]?” It was quietly ushered, and you’d miss it if you weren’t so connected to this man.

“Yeah?” you replied, just as quietly. It was such a fragile moment. Better not to speak too loudly in order not to break it.

“I love you.”

You smiled.

“I love you too.”

He heard the smile in your voice, and it made him smile too.

“You’re the love of my life.”

“You’re the love of my life as well.”

More silence.

Followed by your husband, again.

“I love our family.”

“I love our family too.”

You snuggled closer, inhaling his scent. It was intoxicating. Musky and manly, and it made you swoon every time. Great choice in body wash – a choice made by you.

“Are you smelling me?” Nanami chuckled, his eyes too closing.

“You smell really good.” Now you were the mumbling one. Nanami had to work really hard to understand what you were saying.

Perhaps the night had run its course.

“Goodnight, my love,” he whispered, placing one last kiss on top of your head.

“Night night, ‘Nami…”

You fell asleep in your husband’s arms with a content smile, and a full heart, and Nanami refused to let you go.

He’d lost focus, been to hell and back, too afraid to let his family down.

But as he held half of his world in his arms (and lovingly thought about the other half, comfortably tucked in his crib), Nanami felt blessed. He’d gotten incredibly lucky, with an amazing woman who loved him for who he was and always made sure to remind him of that, and a son who inspired him to be a better man every day that went by.

As he thought about how wonderful his life was, Nanami smiled.

You and Haibara, his guiding lights.

He would never get lost again.

A/N: That's it! Whew!!! Well, once again, I really hope you guys liked it! I loved writing it - Nanami and angst might be my favourite combination, hahaha. Or anyone and angst. I just really like the feels. Anyway, I hope you guys have an amazing day!

#nanami kento x reader #nanami kento x you #nanami kento x y/n #nanami kento x yn #kento nanami x y/n #kento nanami x you #kento nanami x reader #nanami drabbles #nanami x reader #nanami kento fanfiction #nanami kento #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen x you #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen fanfiction #jjk fanfiction #jjk x reader #jjk x you #jjk x y/n

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f1girliefics · 6 months

Text

A Difficult Start

Charles Leclerc x Reader

Warning: mention of injury

Summary: You were a sweetheart, but he was taken.

When you became the social media manager for Max Verstappen, a new door opened for you and you met the other drivers.

Working for Red Bull and Max was amazing and exactly what you were looking for.

Helping and managing social media accounts, and taking pictures at times, you quickly became a part of the team.

When your eyes met Charles for the first time, it was strange. You felt a connection you couldn’t describe.

It was as if you met your other half.

The problem?

The problem was the tall woman by his side.

The woman he probably didn’t even fully know.

That night, during your first meeting, you went to the bathroom when she came in with her friend.

The things she said about you.

You were disgusted.

And you should have known to trust your instincts, she was indeed a bully.

And she further proved your point when she decided to pour her wine all over you.

She apologised but still couldn’t keep the smirk off of her face.

Nah, you won’t play her games.

Back then, you promised yourself that you wouldn’t allow her to do anything else to you.

And so far, you have managed to do just that.

Avoiding her and the Ferrari team was a good start.

But fate often had other ideas.

Somehow, no matter what you were doing, you ran into Charles.

You have been taking photos of the team for a year-book you wanted to have as a gift for everyone when you ran into him by accident.

“Oh, sorry.” you said even before you saw who it was you ran into.

“It’s all good. Are you okay?” the accent was unmistakable. You looked up and nodded at Charles.

“Sorry about that.”

“It’s okay, you seem busy.”

“Oh, I’m taking pictures of the team.” you showed him your camera.

"That's nice! You always take such good pictures. I would hire you myself if I could but you are already... taken." it felt as if his words had a deeper meaning, but you tried not to search for it.

"Thank you very much. I'm glad my work is paying off." you smiled.

“It really is. Sorry, but I have to go, take care.” he smiled. He had such a gorgeous smile.

Then, everyone was invited to celebrate Max’s win. Or should you say another win?

Charles and his girlfriend was there of course and you could feel her eyes stabbing daggers into your back from afar.

She really didn’t like you, and you had to be ready in case she would do something.

You went to the bathroom and on your way back you noticed Charles standing alone, he looked at you as you got closer.

“Enjoying yourself?” he asked but the music was so loud you didn’t hear him, you leaned in closer as he leaned into your ear and asked the same thing.

You quickly nodded as an answer and he smiled.

This, apparently to his girlfriend, looked like flirting… her insecurities were showing.

“Don’t flirt with my boyfriend.” she said as she tried to pour another glass of wine on you, but your hand came up and the glass ended up on her.

You quickly spoke up.

“Oh, I’m so sorry! I didn’t see your hand there!” you said and you just knew she would use this against you.

Make you out to be the jealous one and ruining her dress.

She stormed out with Charles following her.

You looked across the table and saw Carlos looking at you.

“I saw it.” he told you and you smiled. At least someone was on your side.

But your evening didn’t end there, why would it?

After her attempt at ruining at your dress, now it was suddenly her mission to break your ankles.

She tried to trip you up at least five times already, and it had been only two hours since you arrived.

But then, she took it too far.

She pushed you down a flight of stairs.

“Oh my Gosh! Y/N!” you heard her yell. “Someone quick, she fell down! She had too much to drink!” you would have cared if it wasn’t for the throbbing pain in your wrist. But the red blinking of a camera pointing right at the stairs did give you some ease.

You were taken to the hospital where they determined that you had broken your wrist.

As you thought back the noise of your bone breaking kept on making you cringe.

“There was a camera, check the footage, I didn’t fall, she pushed me.” you informed the police after you called them into the hospital.

You were there when they arrested her.

Her story went from blaming you for drinking to saying she was trying to catch you and finally, she said it was all an accident and she never touched you.

They saw the footage, but her constantly changing story was also raising many red flags.

“The footage from the club clearly shows you pushing Miss Y/L/N. You are arrested for assault and will be brought in for questioning.” said the officer once he had enough of her drama.

You quickly turned and walked back to work.

You avoided everything expect for the police when they came to interview you or called you for updates.

You just worked.

Then a week passed.

Two weeks.

A month.

Now, you were in Monaco getting ready for the next race.

You had your laptop as you posted more photos of the Team and Max, you all were excited for the weekend as usual.

It was difficult to find a quiet corner but when you finally did, you were very glad.

You worked for about two hours in silence when you heard someone approaching.

“Hi.” he said as he came around the corner.

“Hello Charles.”

“I see you needed a quiet moment as well.” he said as he sat down at the table across from you.

“I did. I can leave if you need yours.”

“No, you can stay.” he said, silence followed, rather uncomfortable silence which he ended up breaking. “I’m sorry. I should have said this sooner, but I’m sorry about my ex.”

“It wasn’t your fault.”

“She told me you were jealous of her, I found it strange, you don’t seem the kind who would pour wine on a person for that… And then the police showed me the video. I am truly sorry, Y/N.”

“She thought I would steal you from her.”

“All she wanted is my money. She always asked me to buy her new things. I later found out she sold a couple things and the others she kept, she went around and showed it to everyone.”

“She was a bitch.”

“Yes.” he agreed immediately. “I just hope we can start a friendship.” you smiled at him and nodded.

“I’d like that.” he smiled as well.

— a year later —

As usual, the Pit was loud, with people talking, engineers checking the cars, and teams discussing the strategies, you even saw Carlos a couple times talking to everyone in the Ferrari pit.

You were walking from the AlphaTauri pit back to the Red Bull Racing one when someone grabbed you.

“Gosh! Stop scaring me like that!” you said as you almost dropped your camera.

“Sorry.” Charles laughed at you.

“Excited for today?” you asked and he nodded like a child in a candy store.

“I have a great chance at winning I feel like.”

“I hope you do. But even if you don’t we will have a party.” although your relationship with Charles started with turbulences, you two managed to work it all out.

“Will you wear the red dress?”

“Only if you win.” you smiled with mischief as he pulled you closer and placed a quick kiss on your lips.

“I will win. I have to see you in red.” you pulled him in for one last quick kiss before he had to leave. "You will see."

You were certainly looking forward to seeing him on that podium.

#charles leclerc #charles leclerc x reader #f1 #f1 fanfic #f1 imagine #f1 imagines #f1 x reader #formula 1 #charles leclerc imagine #formula one #charles leclerc fanfic #charles leclerc imagines #charles leclerc fanfiction #scuderia ferrari #charles leclerc x fem reader #charles leclerc x female reader #charles leclerc x you

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tkaulitzlvr · 7 months

Note

could u do 2008 tom getting in an argument with the reader and after arguing a lot, the reader just tries to go to bed. after a couple mins, tom realizes he was wrong and tries to climb in bed with the reader and is like super clingy and tries to touch the reader but gets ignored. and he’s all like “yk how i get when i can’t touch you” AUGHH😩😩 and then it’s js smut that ends with fluff/aftercare

btw ur my fav writer ever i absolutely adore ur writing 🖤

LET ME SHOW YOU - T. KAULITZ

synopsis: you are tired of arguing, deciding to go to bed before things get too out of hand. tom realises that he has messed up, but you are being stubborn, still not over what he has done. he doesn’t give up so easily, begging to get what he wants.

content: angst to smut, little bit of fluff throughout.

a/n: thank u so much that really means a lot!! love this idea, i hope u enjoy!💞

“you know what? i’m done. i’m tired of explaining this to you when you clearly don’t get it.” i huff, shaking my head and running my hands through my hair.

“you’re right. i don’t get it. you’re mad at me for doing my job!” he shoots back, eyes cold and dark, jaw clenched as he stands across from me on the other side of the kitchen.

“you can’t be fucking serious! don’t paint me as some clingy selfish girlfriend when all i’m asking is that you don’t come home at midnight every night, and go straight to bed! it’s like we aren’t even together anymore. we live in the same house but we never talk, never communicate. you only show me affection if it’s a quick kiss or hug, or you want sex.” i rant, fuming at his lack of mindfulness, failing to believe how he is so oblivious.

“what so we’re just lying now, is that what this is?” he scoffs, taking a breath before continuing. “cause you know that’s not true. i always hug you, kiss you, tell you i love you, don’t i? and you know that i value you way beyond sex, so don’t even go there.”

“you’re completely missing the point!”

“then what is the fucking point?”

his voice raises far higher than mine, louder than it ever has before. he would never raise his voice at me, not like this. my mouth opens, tears clouding my vision as i am taken aback at his sudden outburst, but he doesn’t seem to care, my silence only seen as an invitation to keep going.

“hm, what is the point? you’ve always known that my job demands a lot of me, and i told you that it would be difficult, but i’m trying my best. if i could be with you more, i would. you know that we’re pushing to get this album perfect, so can you give me a fucking break and stop acting like i’m some awful boyfriend?” he shouts, anger laced within every word, each one stabbing me right in the heart, making me feel stupid for even bringing this whole conversation up. i just missed him, but he couldn’t seem to understand why.

i nod my head, pursing my lips together as the tears cascade down my cheeks.

“okay. i’m going to bed.” i whisper, not waiting for him to respond, turning away from him and leaving the kitchen, trudging up the stairs towards our bedroom. he doesn’t follow me, instead i hear a loud bang come from the kitchen, his fist colliding with the counter as he curses in frustration.

the room is strangely cold as i walk into it, completely dark with little natural light coming through the window despite the curtains still being wide open, reminding me of how late it is - and how long i had been waiting for tom to come home. my feet walk along the carpet, the floorboards creaking a little until i arrive at my bed, climbing into it and letting the covers embrace me, instead of tom. i feel numb, not enough energy in me to cry, yet too upset to just sleep it off. instead, i stare out of the window, the cityscape invading my eye line as i try to distract myself from what had just happened, watching the world around me as it moves on and on, wishing that i could do the same.

the door slowly creaks open, my head turning in its direction as tom walks through it, his expression one of pure regret. he is silent, not saying a word as he goes over to the mirror, taking his cap off and placing it gently on the dresser, taking his dreads out of their ponytail, his eyes suddenly meeting mine through the mirror as i stare into them.

“baby can we talk?” he says, still looking at me through the mirror as he removes his shirt, folding it neatly and leaving it on top of the dresser, his bare back facing me from across the room.

“about what?” i scoff, finally breaking the eye contact and laying down, staring motionlessly at the ceiling. “you were pretty sure of what you said, there’s nothing else to speak about.”

my gaze still fixed on the ceiling, i hear him step away from the mirror, walking cautiously towards the bed. i feel it dip beside me, before two arms snake around my waist.

i roughly pull away from his grip, taking his hands and shoving them back in his direction, not falling for his attempts to iron out the tension, especially ones that involve him putting his hands on me.

“baby…you know i didn’t mean any of that.” he calmly speaks, trying again to touch me, this time taking my hand in his. once again, i refuse, shuffling even further away from him.

“can you not touch me? i’m not in the mood for your shitty apologies just- go to sleep.” my voice is harsh, hurt taking over his expression as i speak, but i don’t feel an ounce of sympathy for him. instead, seeing him experience even a fraction of the sadness that he had just put me through satisfies me.

“leibe…please listen to me. i’m so sorry.” he begins, turning onto his side so that he is now facing me. “i’ve been a shitty boyfriend lately, you don’t deserve that. i’ve just been so caught up with the album and it brought me away from you, but i shouldn’t have let it. please baby, please forgive me. i’ll never let this happen again.”

as he comes to the end of his speech, his hand tentatively reaches for my cheek, his thumb trying to stroke the skin, but i move backwards, becoming irritated at his ignorance.

“are you deaf? stop touching me tom!” i ignore his apology, because right now, it means nothing to me, his initial words still a fresh wound. no apology, no matter how sincere, would be enough to make me forget them just yet.

“schatz, please, you know how i get when i can’t touch you. don’t accept my apology, don’t talk to me, i get it, i deserve it. but please my love, just let me hold you, that’s all i want.” he begs, his voice reducing to a whisper as it cracks a little.

his love language had always been physical touch, and, even when we were fighting, he would always hold me whilst we slept, no matter how mad i was. i knew that me refusing his touch was getting to him and, despite me being completely infuriated, it was impossible to ignore the slight pang of guilt that settled in my heart as i listened to his pleas.

i say nothing, moving a little closer to him, leaving enough space so that he would have to reach out to be able to touch me. he takes my silence as a yes, inching his body closer to mine, his arms pulling me tightly into him, his head resting in the crook of my neck. i feel him relax a little, his shoulders dropping as he pulls me further into his embrace, holding me so tightly that i can feel his heartbeat from within his chest. his breathing tickles my neck, his head snuggling into it as he takes in my scent, clearly having missed being this close to me. but still, i say nothing, giving him this small sense of comfort though anger still courses through my veins, in no position to forgive him just yet. however, it is impossible to deny the security i gain from his embrace, the way his hands run comfortingly up and down my back giving me a sense of contentment that only he can bring.

“i love you. i love you so much.” he whispers into my neck, planting a short and soft kiss there. “you’ll never understand how much i love you baby, you’re everything to me, my whole world.”

his hands begin to caress my lower back, travelling downwards and giving my ass a soft squeeze as his lips plant slow kisses on my neck and collarbone, all whilst he continues to whisper sweet nothings into my ear, pouring his heart out whilst his movements begin to increase - making his intentions crystal clear.

“tom please, not now. i’m still mad at you.” i say, trying to keep my voice stern, but an elongated sigh pours from my parted lips once his find the spot below my ear that makes me go crazy.

“you won’t be once i’m finished, i promise baby. just let me show you what you mean to me, mhm?” he asks, pulling his head from my neck to look into my eyes, a glint of desperation present within them.

i study his features, starting at his brown eyes - warm and enticing, looking into mine with so much admiration, so much love. his skin, smooth and flawless, unable to count how many times i have felt it against mine. his lips, soft and inviting, decorated with a small metal ring, loving how it would always feel against me, the harshness of it always contrasting with the warmth of his lips as they would move against mine.

and it is that small glance that makes me give in, my hands reaching for his head as i pull it downwards, quickly joining his lips with mine. he is taken aback, but it only takes him a few seconds to kiss me back, cupping my face with his hands and bringing me in even closer, our bodies merging as one.

he pulls away, a soft smile tugging on his lips as he begins to gently remove my clothing, starting with my shorts, kissing upwards until he reaches my hoodie, that soon following, leaving me in only my lingerie.

“so perfect.” he mutters, pecking my lips. “you’re so beautiful meine liebe, you know that?”

my cheeks heat up at his words as they spill like liquid gold from his pink lips, our fight feeling further and further away. it becomes harder to imagine that it ever happened, the way he touches me with such care making it seem almost impossible.

his clothes already off as he always sleeps in just his boxers, he reaches to remove his underwear, turning his attention to my own panties, letting them join the existing pile of clothes scattered around the room.

he moves to the top of the bed, sitting with his back resting against the headboard, gently picking me up and placing me into his lap as i straddle his waist, hands resting his shoulders as i stare into his eyes, a little nervous as i am never usually the one on top.

“tom i-”

“shhh, you’re okay, just ride.” he comforts, moving loose strands of hair from my face, placing a reassuring kiss on my lips.

i nod hesitantly, lifting my hips up and sliding down onto him, moaning as i take him in, my walls stretching as they become accustomed to his size. tom’s head has fallen backwards, fingers digging into my hips a little as his lips are parted, no noise escaping from them.

once i am used to his size, i begin to bounce slowly, picking up a steady rhythm as tom continues to hold on to my hips, helping me move.

“doing so well baby. just like that.” he sighs, his teeth sinking into his bottom lip, eyes squeezing shut.

it doesn’t take long for my legs to ache, no longer able to continue moving up and down, already tired. my movements are slow and lethargic, almost half-hearted as i try my best to keep going, chasing my release as i crave it more than anything, tom clearly feeling the same as his hold on my waist only tightens, his grip strong enough to leave faint marks on the skin.

“i can’t.” i whine, frustrated that i can’t keep going, completely spent. i fall forwards, collapsing onto tom’s chest, still inside him as he slowly thrusts upwards into me, his arms wrapping around my back as he kisses my forehead.

“you did so good baby, don’t worry.”

those are the only words he says before swiftly flipping us over, my back flush against the mattress as he begins to thrust into me at a relentless pace from above, my mouth falling open as loud moans pour from it, his name a mantra as it effortlessly falls from my lips. he hits places within me that have never been touched before, so deep inside me that i can feel him in my stomach, a small bulge visible as he moves in and out of me.

“love you so much, fuck-” tom groans, his hands on my thighs as he kneads the flesh, prying them further apart as the pleasure prompts them to try close around his waist.

“getting close baby, you close?” he mutters, moving his head so that his forehead is against mine, eyes studying my face as he awaits my response.

all i can do is let out an almost inaudible ‘mhm’, so close to my release that i can almost feel it, the knot in my stomach ready to burst any second. the way his dick twitches inside of me tells me that he is there too, his thrusts irregular.

“let go schatz, cum for me.” he says, watching as my face twists in pleasure, my release washing over me, the pressure of his coming at the same time too much as i squeeze my eyes shut, hands clutching onto his upper arms. my entire body shakes, the feeling overwhelming, mouth open in a silent scream as tom moans into my ear, still rocking in and out of me slowly, riding out our highs.

i am completely spent, laying motionless beneath him, my throat raw from the sounds that had emitted from it, breathing heavy and reckless. tom pulls out, wiping a few tears from my eyes that i hadn’t even realised had fallen, kissing the skin afterwards.

“you okay baby? you did so good, did i go too hard?” he says, my mind not fully registering what he is saying as i am completely exhausted, eyes starting to flutter shut. “you can’t sleep yet, let’s get you cleaned up, yeah?”

i manage a weak nod, feeling tom lift me up bridal style, carrying me into the bathroom and carefully placing me on the counter. he walks over to the bath, turning the taps on and letting the water run, before rushing back over to me, taking a damp cloth and wiping me with it as a jolt when he is a little too rough, the area sensitive.

“sorry baby.” he mutters, kissing my forehead, separating my legs and moving to stand between them, embracing me in a hug and resting his head on top of mine whilst the bath fills up, small ‘i love you’s’ escaping his lips as he rubs my back, trying to soothe me in any way he can.

after a couple of minutes, he picks me up, gently placing me in the bath as the water submerges me, the warmth of it already easing the aching pain that runs through my body. he climbs in behind me as i sit between his legs, my back against his chest.

he washes my hair, massaging the shampoo into my scalp as my head falls backwards onto his shoulder, the feeling relaxing me even more, completely at peace in his arms. he moves to my body, carefully washing the delicate skin, planting occasional kisses on my shoulders and back as my breathing slows, on the verge of falling asleep.

he sees that i am too tired to stand up myself, picking me up and carrying me out as i wrap my arms and legs around him. he finds a towel, setting me back on the counter and drying my body, leaving the bathroom for a second and returning with some fresh ‘pyjamas’ - which consisted of a random t-shirt of his and some clean panties.

“come on baby, put these on then we can go to bed, mhm?” he says as i lift my arms up, allowing him to place the t-shirt onto my small frame, the material hanging off my figure as it reaches my knees. he takes my panties, moving them up my legs slowly, my hips bucking upwards so he can fully put them on me, finally putting his own underwear on.

he takes me to the bedroom, tucking me into bed and placing the covers over me, climbing in beside me, his arms wrapping around my waist as i cuddle into him.

“i’m so sorry for everything. i love you.” he whispers, kissing my hair softly.

i mutter a small ‘love you’ against his chest, falling asleep within minutes, completely exhausted.

requests are open! keep sending them in, working through a lot rn but pushing reqs out as fast as i can!!

#tom kaulitz #tokiohotel #tom kaulitz angst #kaulitz #tom kaulitz fluff #kaulitz twins #tom kaulitz smut #tomkaulitz #tom kaulitz x reader #bill kaulitz

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flnpushy · 8 months

Text

A tricky Pushing

It happened so fast. An internet hookup. He wasn’t even who he said he was. The guy was a complete jerk. I fell for his charm, but deep down I knew he was no good. Why did I let him do it? Why didn’t I just walk away…. He was aggressive with me, almost abusive in the back of his truck. Before I could do anything he had me naked…. After the one night stand he ditched me, never to have contact again, I tried to tell him but he ran, there was no getting him back. So now here I am, 9 months later. With his baby in my belly.

I awoke from this crazy dream. This dream I've had for 9 months now. Hoping this time when I woke up, it wasn’t true. However when my eyes came open, there it was, a big belly hanging from my tiny frame. Ugh… I just want this to be over. Get back to the fun, outgoing, 18 year old girl I was. But this baby had to come out first. I went to all my appointments, and found that of course he had to put a huge baby boy in me. A first time 18 year old mom to be with an 11 pound baby in my belly. I’m so small I thought, I’ve only had sex once, how the hell am I going to push an 11 pound baby out of my tiny pussy? I guess I was about to find out.

After getting pregnant I vanished from people. I didn’t see my friends, my family, or even go outside of my house, except to the doctors. I just wanted to push this baby out and be done. I knew nothing about birth or pregnancy, the doctors said I should seek help to birth or even hire a midwife. I wanted nothing to do with this. It was too embarrassing and I had too much anger to cope with an assisted birth or midwife. I would just do this myself. I tried to end the pregnancy by pushing, reaching inside me and messing with things, hoping to break the water or something. But it was no use. The baby was inside me, and i had no choice but to let it grow….. So much anger, If only I could find that guy and take revenge…..

As I arose for another day of being pregnant alone, It hit me, A hard pain in my gut. I knew it was going to be happening. Finally i thought, I can get this baby out of me. Just push it out nice and fast, and be done.

These pains became more regular. A Couple hours passed. I curled up in a blanket to watch Tv and ride the pains. All i wanted to do was just push, but I knew there was no way the baby was going to just drop out of me. There had to be a dilation thing… right? I truly didn’t know. I stood up from my couch and pulled off my pants, shirt, and panties, exposing my lovely little body. I rubbed my painful belly a couple times and pushed like i needed to poop. This is how you do this? I think….

I pushed a few times, I quickly grew impatient. I carried his baby around for 9 months and now its going to be hard to push out! Seriously! I just wanted this to be done. I stuck my fingers up inside me. I reached way in as far as I could fit my fingers. I felt something bulging. Not sure what it was though. I decided to lay back down on the couch.

Time passed, the pains got worse. It was afternoon, then evening. Was I even going to have the baby today? How long does this labor thing last? Evening turned into night. I went to bed in pain. Awaking every 15 minutes to searing pains in my belly. Now i was really angry.

The next morning came. I had been feeling pains for 24 hours now. But things felt different. The burning and stinging deep inside me was gone. Now The burning was inside my vagina. I awoke and immediately inserted my fingers. I pushed in a ways and bumped something. Its was membranous, squishy, and warm. I pushed in a bit more and felt something hard. Was this the babies head? Suddenly i felt a large gush, my hand was soaked and so was the bed below my body. What the hell was that?! Now the pains got worse… Have I done something bad? I thought to myself? I didn’t care. I walked painfully out to the couch and sat down. I was naked and it felt good, But my body didn’t, My vagina area was really starting to hurt.

“THATS IT!!” I said aloud, “THIS BABY NEEDS TO COME OUT!”

I thought of him again. All this pain for his little bit of pleasure…. UGH!

I then felt like i needed to poop, and badly. I headed to the toilet and sat down. I pushed a few times and quickly realized it wasn’t poop, it was time for me to push the baby out. I made a couple grunts on the toilet before returning to the couch. My body began forcing me to push, it wasn’t very painful yet, and it felt good to push. Each pain made my belly tense up. I put my finger back in my pussy and pushed. I could feel something hard pressing against my finger about 2 inches inside. It must have been the babies head, but i wasn’t sure. When i stopped pushing it receded back a bit. This heightened my frustrations. I stood up, spread my legs wide and pushed hard. I did this for about 15 minutes until i could feel my pussy bulging . I reached down again and felt inside, just within my opening was a head, i could feel a tiny tuft of hair. I knew i was getting close now. Getting closer to being normal again, with no baby in me. Little did I know the battle was just beginning.

I continued pushing standing up for about 20 minutes, growing ever more frustrated that the baby hadn’t come out already. Is this baby stuck in me? I couldn’t help it, i reached down and felt inside me again.

“SERIOUSLY!” I said out loud.

The baby had hardly done anything, not even a centimeter of movement. It had to be stuck. It had to…. But I didn’t know what to do about this. I wasn’t going to seek help… no never. All i wanted was the baby out. I sat back on the couch and pulled my legs up as far as i could, my big belly protruding out hugely in front of me. I pushed a couple times as a bead of sweat ran down my face.

“UGH!! COME OUT!” I yelled.

I realized that I could not see what i was actually doing. My belly was much to big for me to actually see my vagina. I got up and found my big mirror from my bedroom. I took it from the room and balanced it up against my coffee table about 2 feet from the couch. Now i could actually see my vagina. I went to push again. But caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror….. I took a hard look at my huge belly and by puffy pussy below it. I thought of him…. I couldn’t truly believe what his seed had done to me. I was angered once again. I pulled back on my legs and began pushing once more. I continued watching the mirror as i went. After about 20 minutes a tiny slit opened a bit in my pussy, I reached down and pulled my labia open, i could see the head now. As soon as my push ended the head disappeared from sight….

What the hell i thought… Its back inside! I had to think about it, i had held a newborn baby when i was younger that my cousin had gave birth to a couple weeks prior. I remember the size of the head. I looked at my pussy and realized….. How on earth is that going to fit….

Didn’t matter…. I needed this baby out!

I pushed hard again. This time the head could be seen with out opening myself up. I pushed hard an held it. The little head stayed there, until i stopped pushing…. Then it slid in.

“Ugh!!” I said aloud.

I tried again, once more holding the push, seeing the little head, and then watching it slide back in. Was this how it was supposed to be? Or was the baby already stuck?

“Get outta there!” I said aloud.

I pushed again and reached down to feel the little head. How could i see it, touch it, but no matter how hard i push it won’t come out?

It was starting to feel like pushing wasn’t effective. But i kept going.

I squatted down holding the couch behind me. I could still see below my belly with the help of the mirror.

“Mmmmm aaaaaaaa.” I pushed. I could see his little head again.

“aaaaaa hhhhh.” Another push. More of the head.

‘Come on little man…mmmmMMMmmmm.” A bit more head, about the size of a silver dollar was showing now. The contraction ended. Almost like a vacuum the babies little head slipped back inside me. I slid back from my squat and sat on the couch. I closed my legs and relaxed, sealing the baby back in my belly. I relaxed for a few minutes and regained my composure to try again. I squatted back down and began pushing. Nothing with the first contraction, not even a sliver of the head. The next contraction revealed a sliver of the babies head, before retracting back inside me again. One more push with the contraction revealed a bit more head, but not much before disappearing again. I became frustrated. Thinking about his baby stuck in my belly. He had it so easy… Now i have to push….

After another hour of making no progress i decided to walk around and push. Maybe moving around would trigger something to happen, or make more room for that little head to squeeze outta there. I grabbed a little mirror from the bathroom that I could carry, this way when i pushed i could see what was happening. I walked around the room, pacing through contractions. When a contraction hit me i squatted and pushed. I did this for awhile, Walking then, squatting to push, only to continue to see the baby slide back in each time. I continued this for a half hour. Finally i ended up back at the couch, full squat, and pushing more again. I began wiggling my hips as i pushed. Trying anything i could think of to make progress. It just wasn’t coming out. Now i was mad.

I leaned back and pushed with all my strength, i reached down with my hands over my big belly and pulled back on my pussy lips. I tried getting my fingers in and around the babies head as if to attempt to pull it out. But it was no use, the head was to slippery to get a grip on. I was upset and exhausted.

Minutes went by, my body started basically pushing on its own. I had no choice now, there was a baby in me and my body was doing everything it could to push it out. All could do was work with my body and hope the baby came out. About 30 minutes of this passed, finally my pussy was opening farther and farther, slowly letting the baby come forth. Each push shoved the head farther into the opening and attempted to stretch my tight opening. Soon the head was starting to poke out a little bit, but my tight pussy lips continued to grip the babies head relentlessly. The head was now getting ever closer to crown, but still only the size of a silver dollar was really showing in my opening. I needed assistance to get this head to come farther. Maybe how the baby went in could help get it out I thought. I began rubbing myself and playing.

15 minutes passed and i couldn’t hold any longer. I orgasmed. The pressure was crazy as the orgasm contractions slid the baby down a bit more. the head was now pressed so tightly in my opening, it felt like i was going to rip open. The head was now so much bigger in my pussy opening. I pushed a few times but no progress was made. I was getting so close to the forehead of the baby coming through. It was so close, but yet the baby could still slip back in. I was scared to have to go through this again, so i constantly squeezed my muscles to prevent the baby from sliding back. I couldn’t bare the frustration of the baby going back in me now. It was so close to coming out.

“Come on baby, get your head out!” I yelled pushing as hard as i could.

This was the case for 45 minutes. Pushing with all my strength, making absolutely zero progress. I was pushing, my body was pushing, But with everything i had the little baby refused to move.

“COME ON BABY!” I yelled.

I began wiggling my hips side to side and bouncing up and down. Doing anything in my bodies power to release the baby. It was stuck firm. I got up and walked around. the head didn’t move from its position making walking just about impossible. I pushed as i walked hoping for the baby to just fall out of me. But gravity was no help either. I went back to the couch and began to sit down. Thats when i screwed up…..

As is sat down I closed my legs slightly. I felt it…. The slip…. The babies head began retracting back inside.

“NO NO NO NO!!” I yelped. “AHHHHH!” It was painful as the baby retracted. I watched in the mirror, pushing as hard as i could to stop it. But there was no stopping my body. I watched as the head got smaller and slowly disappeared back inside me. I saw in the mirror as my pussy closed up, sealing the baby back in my belly. I literally was flabbergasted. 6 hours of pushing and i still end up pregnant! I took a break.

30 mins went by. Finally i built up the courage and strength to go at it again. I pushed and things went faster this time. One push had the head in view. The next had the baby back where it was. Finally i made one more big push and i was at crown. Now it was time….. For the ultimate push.

I dug my hands into a pillow, gritted my teeth, curled my little toes and push with every ounce of muscle mass that my body had. In one huge movement the head popped free. The baby began to rotate. The new push had the shoulders. Finally one last push freed the baby from the tight clenches of my 18 year old womb. I was done.

#birth #birth kink #giving birth #pregnant #crowning #pregnancy #breech #birth denial #birth story #stuck baby

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websterss · 1 year

Text

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐎𝐍𝐄 𝐖𝐇𝐎 𝐒𝐄𝐄𝐒 𝐓𝐇𝐑𝐎𝐔𝐆𝐇 𝐌𝐄 — 𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐇𝐎𝐍𝐘 𝐋𝐎𝐂𝐊𝐖𝐎𝐎𝐃

𝐑𝐄𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐓: Heyy! Could I request an Anthony lockwood x reader where lockwood gets injured on his side on a mission so at home reader helps him take care of it but he has to take his shirt off. Basically full of fluff

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆(𝐒): A lil bit angsty with some fluff

𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐓: 2,881

𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆: Anthony Lockwood x fem!Reader

𝐀/𝐍: Hope you enjoy it! :) I added angst cause I couldn’t help myself. Anthony Lockwood screams angst lol.

𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓

“Can you stand at all?” Lucy gave a once over to the boy pressed up against a stone. Lockwood grimaced as he felt an ache course up through his rib cage. He faintly nodded a yes to lessen Lucy’s worry over him.

“I think I can manage.” He smirked to mask the pain he was in. “Though I could use a hand.” He reached up, eyes falling onto George. The curly haired boy met his hand and helped him onto his feet again. A muffled grunt didn’t go over their heads. One silent glance of communication was enough to agree to head on home. A home where you currently waited for the trio in.

“Y/n is not going to be pleased about this.” George grimaced.

“So don’t tell her.” Anthony scowled with a grimace.

In a series of cases you would accompany them. The trio originally being a quartet, but after a case with a type two and a torn ligament. Lockwood thought best to keep you under house arrest, much to your chagrin, though you happily obliged to his wishes. Staying home at least until your foot is fully healed. That meant you weren’t allowed to apply pressure to your injury, thus preventing you from doing normal human things. You did your best to offer your knowledge and help out in terms of research, but you would much rather be out there in the field, another thing Lockwood was firm about, no forms of physicality. You hated being homebound, stuck staring at the small four walls of every room in the house, though you knew as much that Lockwood would have a cow if he so much saw you anywhere else but within the apartment. The bloke nearly panicked one day after you stepped foot outside to fetch the mail. Now you wondered how he would react once he knew about your rendezvous scales up and down the staircases. Your foot was far from healing at this point though you obliged. Wanting to keep the peace.

What seemed like a never ending wait, quickly vanished as the familiar twist of the doorknob got your attention from the living room. You hastily pushed yourself up to stand, hobbling towards the entryway. Your smile greeting your tired friends. Lucy reciprocates your smile, whereas George brushes past you with a curt nod, and Anthony…well he has yet to meet your eyes. You glance over at Lucy in hopes of an explanation, but she only further replies with. “It was our most difficult case yet. I’d give him some time.” You place your hand over hers that fell onto your shoulder in passing up towards her room. Your hand lingering on your shoulder. Tucking your neck in, as you subconsciously tether on your good foot. All your weight applied to your left side.

“Anthony.” Your voice rings out but it’s a faint mutter. Loud enough to dance in and out of his ears. You didn’t dare raise an octave. Too scared to break the silence with so much as a raise of your voice. “Ant-“

“Please.” He begs, shaking his head. Not in the mood to be lectured or frowned upon, he wouldn’t be able to bear it, seeing a frown on your soft features. He already got a glimpse of your worry stricken facade. He didn’t want to add on to your concerns. He didn’t need you to strain yourself over the horrible ache in his right side, not when you had your own injuries to worry about. His breathing becomes labored, his jaw clenches. The visible vein popping against his forehead makes your smile downcast.

“You’re hurt, Anthony.” You point out the obvious. You sigh, closing your eyes for what you knew was about to be a stubborn battle that was about to commence.

“It’s nothing.” His voice shakes, making his brave exterior falter. “Nothing I can’t handle.”

“Show me.” You gesture to the side he holds.

“I’m fine. No need to get over dramatic on me.” He straightens out with a smirk. His arms open wide for emphasis. “You have your injuries. I have my own. Goodnight, Y/n.” You roll your eyes, letting him brush past you slowly, then watch him ascend onto the second level. You wait a second then follow after him. Your slow thudded steps are not missed by him. He stops as he reaches the last step. Watching you hold the railing to support your climb. “What the bloody hell are you doing?”

“Wondering if you enjoy pissing me off.” You retort. You land on the deck with a huff. “Wow, that does not get easier.”

“Have you been practicing?” The realization hits him hard. His jaw drops, as two and two come together. You climb with ease, quite possibly faster than he could with his injuries.

“It was either I sit around all day. Or ascend the stairs. What do you think?” You pat his chest. Walking ahead and into his room. You turn back around to face the brute still gaping at you in the middle of the hallway. “Now show me!” You gesture for him to enter. He hesitates, but obliges. Coming into his room, and shutting the door behind him. He glanced up at you, waiting patiently for him to let you tend to his injuries.

“You really ought to just head on to bed. I’ll be fine.” He suggests, rather than fall vulnerable under your now narrowed annoyed eyes.

“And you really ought to know when to shut up.” You motion with your head to his bed. He averts his gaze, looking anywhere that isn’t your hard glare. He knows you mean well, but feeling the full blunt force he received when he fell against his ribcage. He didn’t want to imagine what his side appeared as if it’s caused him this much pain already. He didn’t want to burden you. See you in such pain. Your nurturing and caring stature is something he adores. You always look after others when you should apply such tendencies to your own self. You put others needs before your own, and right now, he knew after showing you how bad he was suffering, how much he was hiding, your mind would linger on this moment for a long time, until your mind occupied something new to dwell and overthink about. It’s why he’s so hesitant to even sit on the edge of his own bed.

“When will you stop being so stubborn and ask for help?” You walk over to the corner of the room, collecting a small aid kit, you recommended Anthony keep, in times of need, and situations as such. He had the tendency to gain a few cuts and bruises here and there. Overworking himself, and hardly gaining any sleep.

“Why bother? You see right through me every time.” The corner of his lips lifts. Eyeing you carefully as you set the box beside him. You roll your eyes, bringing a vacant chair over in front of him to help you clean up his wounds. You scoot until your knees brush. You sigh once more, meeting his eyes that have yet to leave yours.

“You’re right. I do see through every bullshit attempt of feigning okay.” You nod. “Though I wish more than anything that you’d tell me instead. That you’d use your words instead of having to see pain written over your face. I wish you’d tell me, Ant.” Your eyes begin to water. As do his. He holds your gaze, letting his walls tear down to allow you a second of entry.

He nods knowing that he definitely lacks verbal communication. He nods because he knows how this all affects you. He nods because you're the only person who truly sees him. Who doesn’t push him, but encourages him to find his voice and let his guard down around you. A tear falls down his cheek. “It hurts.” He finally allows himself to admit.

You hastily nod, swallowing down the ache in your throat. You sniffle as you try to gain your composure. “Where?”

“It’s my side…” He grits his teeth. “I fell on my side.” He closes his eyes as you go to lift the bottom shirt. His hand quickly stops you from pulling the shirt upwards. “No, no, no. I don’t want you to see. If it hurts this much then it can’t be far from looking bad.”

“Anthony please.” You plead. “I need to see so that I can help you. Make sure you don’t have a broken rib or worse!”

He thinks about it before giving in. His grip on your hand lessens up. You meet his gaze for a brief second then slowly go to lift the hem of his shirt. You lift and lift until his mid section is revealed to you. Your audible gasp has him thinking the worst. You reach out to touch him but stop. “I-I need you to remove your shirt.” You clear your throat. Tears brimming your eyes again. Your teary eyes lift to meet his now concerned ones. “Can you remove it?” You don’t even need his answer, his injuries do look as bad as he says he feels. A firm shake of his head is all you need to help slide down his blazer past his shoulders. Once carefully removed. His shaky hands fumble with unbuttoning the buttons. You take over and start from the top to the bottom. Once you reach the last button, you halt your movements. The overly confident person you are diminishing in a heart heart. Your cheeks grow warm as you overthink about the compromising position you just put yourself in. A shirtless Anthony was not something you thought you’d encounter.

You undo the button and push the shirt open. His chest, now revealed and his bruising and cut now more visible. Your breathing comes out shaky as you go to grab a cloth and disinfectant spray. Your eyes fleet back to his chest, shamefully letting your eyes take in his build. Anthony was a sight that was always sure. Despite the bags under his eyes, and overconfidence, you can see past it all and gawk at his attractiveness. His ego was now surely boosted as his eyes crinkled mischievously. A smirk prominent on his lips as he watched you try and subtly avert your eyes elsewhere, like towards his injuries, but your gaze flickering between his own eyes and open chest has him finding this whole predicament amusing.

“You’re bashful.” He teased, reaching forward to poke fun at your cheeks.

“I am not.” You scoffed at his accusation. You denied him, reluctant to let him see that he was winning and you were losing, very very badly.

“You know if you wanted to rid me of my shirt, you only needed to ask.” His laugh broke the barrier, the evident grimace now apparent as he grunted about the pain he felt. He had to make a mental note to not shake of laughter, at least until he got better and his side wasn’t currently sore.

“Keep laughing, see where that gets you.” You chuckled, yet the familiar twinkle in his eyes was now reflecting back at him. “Besides…who says I wanted to see you shirtless?” Your eyes fail you as you chance a look at his chest again, then to his knowing stare. You let your head fall wanting to avoid confronting him and your clear feelings for him. Though the slight lift of your chin by his own hand has you thinking that the feelings you hide might not be all so invisible to a certain someone.

“I say.” His face inches closer, the warmth of his breath closer to your lips than you wanted. The smallest flicker down to your lips then up to your e/c irises does not escape you. Your breath hitches when he lets his head lean against yours. Heads now pressed together. His hand still lingers under your chin, never retracting or falling back down to his side. “I am so utterly grateful for you, Y/n. I don't know what my life would be like if you hadn’t walked into my life.”

“I didn’t exactly walk though now did I?” Your smile widens. Eyes crinkling at the corners as you pulled back to look at him. “More like fell.” You laugh, reminiscing over your first encounter with each other. Another one of your cases gone wrong, you fell backwards when Anthony had opened the door your back was pressed against. Two strangers meeting under a ghostly scenario. What more could perfectly describe your bond with one another?

“You were scared that day.” He remembered. You nodded.

“I was…It was my first case. I was on my own till you showed up.” Your stomach flutters under his gaze. You fiddle with the cloth in your hands. “I’m glad you did though. You saved me that day.” You let out a breathy laugh. His eyes never faltered, never fleeting. His gaze was intense, wanting to remember every little detail about you. This life you all lived, nothing was ever truly promised, you and him weren’t so easily promised. Tomorrow could come, but there’d be the chance that you wouldn’t. He was so afraid of losing you. Losing the team, and ending up alone like how he was after his parents died. He was trying to hold onto you all until he couldn’t anymore.

“No.” He denied it. “You saved me.” He adjusted himself into a better sitting position. Straightening up. You gave the faintest smile. Looking away in hopes to lessen your flustered state. You saved him, and he saved you.

“You okay? I bandaged up the wound as best as I could, but you’ll need another clean up tomorrow.”

He looked down to observe your masterful work of art. He nodded reassuringly that he was okay. “Nothing a few pain meds can’t fix.” He joked, but saw you hesitate. “I’m okay. The pain isn’t as bad anymore.”

“Sure?”

“I promise. You’ve cured me.” He beamed.

“I wouldn’t go as far as that but I do try my best.” You began gathering the mess you made and all the opened wrappers.

“No, you are the best doctor anyone could ever ask for.” He placed his hand over yours stopping you from cleaning up after yourself. “Thank you.”

“You don’t have to thank me everytime I bandage you up Lockwood.” You reminded him. You’d help him any day given, no questions asked. “I want to help.”

“Thank you for everything you do for us.” For me, he wanted to say. You rolled your eyes and gathered up all the trash. You moved the chair back to stand and was stopped by Anthony’s grip on your wrist again. “You okay?” Your brows furrowed, looking down at him. He strained himself, using your arm for support to stand up to his feet. His breath shuddered as he stood silent for a second. “Anthony you okay?” He nodded in response. Then he grew flustered himself. You opened your mouth to speak again but clamped it shut when he leaned forward. His lips pressing a soft gentle kiss against your cheek. Your eyes widened in surprise, and your breath hitched in the back of your throat. Your dilated pupils met his own that were widened in shock of what he had just done. Your grip on all the trash loosened causing all the scraps to fall and float towards the bottom. “Oh I uh-” You scrambled, bending down to collect all the trash. Anthony raised a hand to rub the back of his neck subconsciously. He did not expect you to react this way.

“Sorry here let me-”

“No it’s okay I got it-” You waved him away. Though as you rose to your full height and he lowered closer to the ground, your heads budded against each other. You both groaned, touching the areas that collided.

“I’m so sorry-” He began, grimacing as the pain in his side returned.

“It’s fine!” You reassured him, rubbing your aching headache.

“No really. I shouldn’t have kissed you. I caught you off guard and I-” He was then cut off by your own lips. You pulled back in haste. Eyes widened in shock. You reacted impulsively and your mind said to kiss him, so you shut him up. “Oh…” He was the speechless one this time.

“Sorry-” You began. He held onto your shoulders, shaking his head to reassure you.

“No, it's fine. I just didn’t expect it.” You nodded in response this time.

“I’m gonna go now…” You answered lamely, gesturing with your thumb to the door. “Let you get some rest.” You took a step away only to be stopped once more. The tug on your forearm causing you to turn back around to face him.

“Stay.” The four lettered word caused your heart to skip a beat.

“Stay?”

“I want you to stay.” He muttered softly.

“You want me to stay?” You breathed out softly.

“I do. Please stay…If you want to of course!”

“I do.” You nodded surely.

“Okay.” His smile grew, tugging your arm to lead you closer to him.

“Okay.” You breathed out a laugh as you continued to let him tug you closer.

#anthony lockwood #anthony lockwood x reader #anthony lockwood imagine #anthony lockwood x fem!reader #anthony lockwood imagines #anthony lockwood oneshot #lockwood and co fanfiction #lockwood and co #lockwood and co x reader #my gif #writings by juls

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kingofspadescos · 5 months

Text

Astarion x Reader - All You Wanna Do

Warnings - ANGST WITH GOOD ENDING

TW - Trauma, Sexual trauma mention

ALMOST MADE MYSELF CRY FROM THIS-

So in Six we all know Katherine Howard's (the pink one) song right? '

'All You Wanna Do'

And it goes through her lovers but how they only used her for her body?

Tell me that isn't Astarion.

Imagine after escaping Cazador (or at some point) he tries to get back out into the dating pool. He just wanted something, anything to make the numb feeling go away. And he thought he found it, but every day he'd wake up to an empty bed and every time he could feel more and more of himself break. Its an endless vicous cycle that he tries desperstly to break but fails inevitably.

He gives up, slinking back to the shadows and watching from afar.

But then one day when he slips out at night to visit a midnight market he accidently bumps into someone.

And it just so happens to be you.

He tilts his head when you smile up at him

"Sorry, sir, apprantly the skill of walking has alluded me" you said.

He's dumbfounded, a snarky remark at the tip of his tongue but unable to make it past his lips. How could it? You were truly breathtaking, the moonlight reflecting off your skin in a way he could only describe as ethereal.

And the way you looked at him, oh gods your eyes had him reeling. There was no hunger in them, no want, no lust, just embarrassment and genuine kindness, something he was not used to being the target of.

He could handle pure mindless need, but this? Such a sweet innocent little thing like you? Oh, no, he couldn't handle that. Not when you looked at him like he actually mattered in the world.

He barely managed out a stangled 'its fine' before dashing back to his dwelling...where he proceeded to lock himself away for days.

What else was he supposed to do? His heart was beating to another rhythm, a time that only meant heartbreak, anger, and self loathing. He couldn't handle it, not again.

But then, after a few days, a knock sounded at his door, and with caution he had opened it to find you there, holding his blade.

"Hi! You dropped this at the market a few days ago" you said "I asked around about you so I could find you, which was tremendously easy, apprantly there is only one known vampire around here."

And there that smile was again and those same eyes that had him crumbling.

"Thank you" he had coughed out, gently grabbing the blade. He wanted you out, far away from him as possible, just so he could function normally. But then your fingers accidently brushed his and he was almost done for.

Panic, excitement, fear, and hope came down on him in waves as he looked into your eyes again. He barely manged to stop himself from taking a step back as if the adoration and happiness that were captured in your eyes had physically pushed him.

"Well I should probably get going" you said turning to walk, and a new panic rose in his chest, the fear of never seeing you again.

"Wait!" He said too quickly for his own liking "come in for some tea, won't you? It's the least I could do to repay you."

From there you two go closer and closer, spending as much time together as possible. Each second he spent with you he felt his heart reach out towards you as if to embrace you and never let go.

But the fear was still there, the fear that he would get to close and you would leave him, just like everyone else.

However, the day came when you confessed. A new dagger in one hand and a rose in the other you looked up at him with those eyes. The same eyes he had yet to act normal about and told him you liked him and wanted him to be yours and you to be his.

The cold hand of panic that crippled his heart made an appearance, twisting the fear into his body and causing his knees to buckle. God's, he felt so stupid, felt so vulnerable and useless, but then a warmth surrounded him.

Your embrace.

You held him, arms tightly woven around his body keeping him secure to you.

"You can say no, you can tell me no" you had whispered, and he almost jumped at the out "but if you're willing to let me hold your heart ill shall cherish it til' the sun no longer shines and even then I shall create my own."

You had him in tears, hands clutching at you in desperation and head burying into your neck.

The rest of the night was spent with assurance and love, you guiding him through a simple kiss that led to nothing more.

And in the morning when he awoke, he cried again when he saw you curled into his side, hand clutching his with the intent of never letting go.

#Bg3 #baldurs gate #baldurs gate astarion #baldurs gate 3 #bg3 astarion #astarion #astarion my beloved #astarion ancunin #astarion x tav #astarion x reader #angst #angst with a happy ending #Six #six the musical #im crying #fanfiction #vampire

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lyjen · 2 months

Text

Deathwish

Summary: When Evan walks (Y/n) home to her apartment, they bump into something that turns (Y/n)’s cop radar on. They decide to check it out. But it goes horribly wrong when she makes a mistake.

9-1-1 Masterlist

…………………

“You know.. you didn’t have to walk me home.” (Y/n)’s voice spoke as her fingers intertwined with Evan’s, while he had his arm resting around her shoulders.

Evan smiled down at (Y/n). “You know I wouldn’t let you walk home alone. LA is full of creeps and criminals these days.“ He knew she would tell him to just go home.

They were walking home from the bar. Well, Evan was walking (Y/n) home from the bar. And after he watched her get in to her apartment, he would walk himself home. That was the plan.

The bar wasn’t that far from their homes. It was just a few blocks. A little bit too much to ask to call an Uber for.

“Yeah.. that’s true. But now that I’m a cop, I’m pretty sure i can handle it by myself is something would happen.” She says, as she glances a soft smile towards her boyfriend.

“Technically, you’re not a cop yet.” Evan spoke, as he received an offended look from (y/n). “I mean.. you are a cop! But not yet a cop.. cop. You know?..” He tried to talk himself out of it. He tried his best. God, she loved teasing him. To see him freak out like that, trying not to hurt her feelings..

She glances up at him, while their fingers were still intertwined together. As she starts to laugh at Evan’s try to save himself from this conversation.

Evan stops walking and let his arm slowly glide down her shoulder as she keeps on walking. He sighs while he shows a smile.

He knew he was panicking for nothing.

(Y/n) took place in front of Evan. “Yeah, I get it. I’m not yet a cop, I’m still a rookie. But I’ll get there.” She says determined.

Evan smiles and grabs her hand to pull her closer to his chest. He presses a kiss on her lips. Her hand tracing towards the back of Evan’s neck. For a second, it felt like it was just them. No drama. Just them.

(Y/n) flinches as she hears something falling in the alleyway they were standing in front of. Her head shot right to the entry of the narrow way. It sounded like break in noises. Her cop radar was already going off. “What was that?” She reacts to the sound.

Evan was also looking right at the alley. He pressed his lips into a thin line. As he softly shakes his head. “I don’t know.” He simply answers to her question.

She dropped her hand which was still placed on the back of Evan’s neck. And she pushed her jacket away, to let her right hand rest on her gun, which was pressed between her hip and her jeans. She always had a gun on her, now that she was a rookie. She turns her body away from Evan, so her body was facing the alley now.

“That were probably a few street cats messing around.”

For Evan it could be a couple of cats fighting and throwing stuff around. But it wasn’t that. It sounded suspicious. She knew the sound of a cat fight. And this wasn’t exactly the sound.

“Stay here.” (Y/n) whispers as she leans forward to take a step, but gets stopped by Evan pulling her arm.

“Are you kidding me? I’m going with you.” Evan stated with a low voice.

“Do you have a gun? Have you learned how to use one? No. So let me do this. I’ll be fine. Just trust me.”

Evan hesitated. But nodded in agreement. He knew he couldn’t stop her, once his girlfriend has something on her mind, he could try anything to go and stop her. But it wouldn’t matter because she would just go with her own plans.

Their eye contact disconnects, as she slowly but carefully walks into the alley. She can hear her own heartbeat beating in her ears and in her throat. She’d never done this before. But she had to step outside of her comfort zone if she wanted to be a cop.

Step by step, she gets deeper and deeper into the alley, holding the gun in front of her. She turns to the right. Following the soft voices she could hear. This alley was huge, like there wasn’t an end at all.

When she finally found the source of the voices, she kept waiting on the corner. So they wouldn’t see her. She could see three men, or at least she assumed they were men. All of them were wearing their hood. Which meant, those people were clearly up to no good.

She knew she couldn’t handle them on her own. (Y/n) had to call for back up. The only way to do that, was to call 9-1-1. But she had to get back to do that. Otherwise they might hear her.

When she heard enough, (Y/n) slowly started walking back the way she walked in here. “Going somewhere?” A low toned voice spoke up. Which send a shiver down her spine. There was a guy in front of her. Mask on, fully black clothed. When she feels how a few more came standing behind her.

She’s surrounded.

She feels a burning pain when something metal makes contact with her back. Which causes her to fall down on her knees, while she tries to break her fall with her hands. She holds herself up, keeping her from falling forward.

Tears started running down her face. The pain was spreading across her spine and shoulder blades. She started to breathe heavily, trying not to scream out, that’s the kind of reaction they wanted.

Not many seconds later, she felt one of the feet of the guys meet her abdomen. Which made her fall on her side. With her arms she reached towards her abdomen. She felt how the blood inside her body rushed through her veins to the place where the foot met her stomach.

A cough leaves (Y/n)’s mouth, blood mixed with spit coming out of her mouth. She groans at the burning feeling inside of her body. And with all of her strength she rolls onto her back. Trying anything to make the pain she felt to be come less.

He roughly grabs a fist full of her hair and pulls her up. Her back wasn’t touching the cold wet ground anymore. She was now sitting up, at least with the strength of the man in front of her. She didn’t have the power to keep herself up, to ease the pain that was pounding through her scalp now.

A furious yet annoyed look projected on (y/n)’s face “Mind your own business next time. Cop.” she collected all the spit and blood which filled up in her mouth, and spit it in the man’s face.

He lets go of her hair and wipes a hand down his face. She tries to break her fall with her arms and hands. Full with anger and disgust he takes a look at his hand, now full of the spit and blood. As he suddenly within a second points a gun towards (y/n).

“You have a deathwish? Cause I can make that wish come true right fucking now!” He said with a loud voice. (Y/n) stayed quiet holding herself up with her hands behind her back. Looking emotionless at the man.

(Y/n) had been in these kind of situations before. And she reached the point where if someone was pointing a gun towards her, it didn’t do anything to her anymore. It’s like she found the switch off button.

One of the others puts a hand on the top of the gun, and pushes it down to the ground, so it wasn’t pointing at her anymore. (Y/n) hears them mumbling something, she couldn’t quite catch whatever they were saying.

The man looks like he’s walking away. But then, within a blink of an eye, the man ran towards her. He’s standing over her, pushing her to the ground and hitting her in the face like she was a living punching bag.

Her vision turns blurry, and spots in black and white were starting to form in her eyes. She could still feel the man hoovering over her, as her vision totally turns into black.

Evan tapped his feet, and impatiently takes a look at his watch. Three minutes.. she went into that alley, three minutes ago. For him those three minutes, felt like three years. Evan couldn’t simply stand back and wait.

He wasn’t the type for it. He always wanted to help.

Evan knew that dating a cop, or a rookie, came with consequences, like his own job did too. But it was different. In some sort of way, it seemed like being a firefighter came with less dangerous situations. Yes, they’d run into burning building, help anywhere they could when they were in the middle of a natural disaster. But being a cop came mostly with weapons, criminals, drugs, fights and so much more where Evan didn’t have any experiences with.

It was scary because it was the unknown. He didn’t know what kind of criminals were running around in Los Angeles. He didn’t know what they were in capable of doing. Especially if they knew (Y/n) was a rookie.

“Come on..” he whispers to himself. He promised (Y/n) to stand back. To wait. To trust her. Yes, she’s a cop in probation period. But that’s still a cop. And she was a damn’ good one.

Another minute passes by. He groans, and let a hand go through his blonde curls. He sighs.

“Fuck it.” he mumbles to himself as he walks straight into the alley he just saw his girlfriend vanishing into. Gun or no gun, he was going in. Maybe he could fist fight himself out of it, if there actually was trouble. He had trained enough.

When he slowly, but carefully walks into the ally, Evan is focussed on every sound he hears. He can hear his own breathing fastening when he turns a corner.

Evan walks deeper and deeper into the alley, which truly felt like a maze by now. When he turns another corner he sees something on the ground in the distance.

Before he could even process what was going on, who or what was lying down on the ground a few feet further down the alley. But his gut was telling him that it was his girlfriend lying on the cold wet ground.

He feels how something cold gets pressed into the back of his shoulder. He hears a click. And within less than a second he could feel a cruel pain fill a huge spot on his shoulder.

(Y/n)’s vision was still blurry, but with every blink, they went a little more clear. She groans and turns on her side.

With her vision now being crystal clear. A gunshot rang through her ear drum. The gunshot went from a normal shot into a high frequency sound. She could see how a body fell down to the ground. Lifeless.

She doesn’t know who it was, who got shot. All she knew is that she needed to help. She rolled another 90 degrees, so she was now on her belly. (Y/n) tries to collect every single piece of energy she had left, and pushed herself up to her feet.

With her right hand still resting on her stomach, to try and ease the throbbing pain she felt from the bruises she assumed. She limps towards the victim. When she gets closer. She recognises that jacket. The grey jacket Evan wore at this exact night. “Buck?” She said with a confused tone. Why did he follow her? When she told him not to.

Panic rushed through her body when she saw her own boyfriend lying lifeless on the ground. She tries to run, but her body couldn’t handle it. So she made it a speed walk, mixed with a few limps in between her movements.

“Buck!” she called out louder through her sobs as she truly realizes what was happening. She drops herself to her knees next to his side as she cried his name out multiple times, with the hope that he would open his eyes. “Evan. Please Evan. Wake up.” She shakes his arm and pats her hand on his cheek.

(Y/n) takes a look at his body, scanning him for the wound that got him going unconscious. As she spots the wound, she immediately starts putting pressure on it. She pushes the skin down with as much strength as she got. Both of her hands were spread with blood. (Y/n) reaches with one hand into the left pocket of the jacket she was wearing, reaching for her phone. Smears of blood were over her phone when she tries to dial 9-1-1.

“Firefighter down. Firefighter down” she repeats with a voice which sounded like she was out of breath and sobbing.

After a while she hears the sirens of police cars and ambulances in the distance while she was still trying to keep enough pressure on the gunshot wound.

Her arms were starting to shake, she was tired. Her whole body was aching at the wounds they had left her with. She can feel the presence of a few people getting to her side and her Evans. “27 year old male, gunshot wound to the left shoulder. Unconscious since I found him.” She hears how one of them tells her that she can let go now. That they’ve got this.

It feels like everything around her was happening in slow motion. But she wasn’t really present, it’s like nothing in her brains seems to see what’s going on.

The second she feels a hand touching her shoulder, she lets go of her boyfriend’s body. And she gets guided towards one of the other available paramedics.

She saw a familiar face coming into view. It was Eddie, who was probably on shift because he was wearing his dark blue uniform. “What happened?” He instantly asked her when he recognizes (y/n). Her face had a few cuts mixed with bruises and a black eye.

For a second it was silent. “It’s my fault.” she whispers. His eyes narrowed, and a confused look was projected on his face. He didn’t understand. “What do you mean?” he asked her with a confused tone. “He told me not to go.” She cries. Eddies lips went into a thin line. “Come here” he says as he pulls her to his chest, and feels how instantly a wet spot on his chest is created because of her tears. After a few moments, he pulls back. And takes a look at her face, which didn’t look good at all. “Let’s check you out hm?” (Y/n) nodded, and limped with him towards the ambulance.

…………………

Evan was sitting in his wheelchair one of the nurses gave to him. He wanted to see his girlfriend so badly, that sometimes he’d try and sneak out of his room. But he never came further than the doorframe of his own room. After the workers decided he was fit enough to ride around in his wheelchair, he was outside her room within seconds.

He was staring at her, through the window with these awful hospital blinds. She was in her bed, eyes closed with her face facing the ceiling. A few cuts spread over her face and a black eye that was healing.

Evan was brought in, unconscious on a gurney. And (Y/n) was perfectly fine. At least that was what they thought. But right now, they were waiting for (y/n) to wake up.

“Thought I’d find you here… I was starting to think you’d rolled yourself out of this hospital by now.” Eddie’s voice sounded through his eardrums. He took place next to Evan, so that he was now also looking through the window.

After a few moments of silence. He broke the silence. “You know what she said when we got on scene?” Eddie paused. Earning a questionable look from Evan. “It’s my fault. That’s the first thing she said.” He continued. Buck looked at Eddie. But didn’t know what to say. As he turns his head back to peek through the window. When Eddie didn’t receive anything back. “She’s blaming herself Buck.”

“I know.” Evan says now, with a trembling voice. “She told me to stay back. But I’d never be able to forgive myself, if I didn’t go after her.” He continued.

“She could’ve died, Eddie.” Evan finishes his sentence, Eddie could tell that Evan was on the edge of crying. He could hear it in his voice. Eddie puts his hand on Evan’s shoulder to give him some comfort. “Let’s not talk about what could’ve or should’ve happened okay? She’s alive. And so are you. That’s the only thing that matters.”

“But what are you doing out here? Why aren’t you in there?”

Evan shrugged with his shoulders.”I don’t know.” He answered simply, while he was still facing the window. Eddie put both his hands into his pockets. “Yes you do know.” It suddenly was like Eddie was talking to a child. They were silent. Eddie was waiting for an answer from Evan.

“I’m scared..” Evan broke the silence. “I’m scared that, if I enter this room. I’ll make everything worse. Like I did with entering that alley.” Evan continued. Eddie sighs. “It’s like the universe put a curse on me. Because when something is finally going good, everything falls apart again.”

“Buck. Stop. You’re not cursed. You two were just at the wrong place, at the wrong time. But all I know is, at this very moment.. you are at the right place, at the right time.” Eddie tries to convince Evan.

“(Y/n) needs you. She needs you to hold her, and tell her that everything is going to be okay.” He finishes. Evan sighs deeply, as his eyes went from the window to his best friend. “The only way to do that. Is to go in there.” Eddie says, while his and Evan’s eyes make a connection. Evan pushes his lips into a thin line. Deep down, he knew Eddie was right. So he nodded. His hands went to the breaks of the wheelchair, to take them off so he could move the chair freely.

Evan couldn’t wheel himself. His shoulder was still hurting and healing from the surgery they performed on him. So Eddie pushed the wheelchair inside, so Evan could sit on the left side of her bed. Eddie patted him on the shoulder and left the room.

The room was filled with beeping sounds of the equipment which was connected to her body. He didn’t know what to do.

He sighs. “Why would you blame yourself?” He whispers. He decides to put his hand on hers. Her hand wasn’t cold. But it wasn’t warm either. He rubs his thumb over her hand.

“Remember when we met for the first time?” He smiles at the thought. “We got a call of a house fire. So went out to the call, and we found you and your TO outside the house with the victim. And Bobby got so mad at you two, because there were so many toxic gases in the house. But you went in to save that man’s life anyway without any gear.” He chuckles while a tear went down on his cheek. “He was so mad” he laughed while he squeezed her hand.

“And then when we offered you a health check. And after you got checked out when I was walking back towards the truck, to bring back my oxygen tank.. You straight to the point told me I was cute, and that we should go on a date.” He smiles at the memory. She was so straight to the point sometimes. And that’s what he loved about her. “I’m so happy that I listened to my gut, and went on that date. Even though everyone around me questioned it.”

Her head rolled to the left side, as she slowly opens her eyes. Her vision blurry, but with every blink it became clearer, and clearer. She smiled when her eyes connected with her boyfriends. Her throat was dry as she tries to swallow. “Me too.” She answers his last sentence. Evan’s smile grew wider as he puts his other hand on her cheek. “Hey” he says softly.

“I’m so glad that you’re okay.” Evan sighs as he puts her hand towards his mouth and gives it a kiss. But he notices how her facial expression changes within a snap of a finger. “What’s on your mind?” He asks.

“I should’ve called it in.” She sighs. Still blaming herself for the incident. “I could’ve just ignore the sound.” She goes on. Evan shook his head. “You were ambushed. And outnumbered. Any other cop, would’ve done exactly the same as you. You can’t blame yourself for doing something good, even if it goes wrong.” He tries to get eye contact with her, but she was looking at her feet. A tear falls on her cheek. Evan puts a strand of hair behind her ear. And wipes the tear away with his thumb.

“Don’t blame yourself for being who you are.”

#911 #911 fox #911 imagine #buck imagine #buck x reader #evan buckley imagine #evan buckley x reader #evanbuckley #imagine #911 abc

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