#so i appreciate you trying it!!

[mazeyphaedra]

was rewatching fabian’s baron moment on account of it being the most delicious piece of pvp in my recent memory and ally beardsley’s growth as a player just shone through so brightly and with such clarity. after dusting off their shock they immediately asked about the nemesis ward, had enough knowledge about fellow pcs stocked to remember adaine’s ac with such like frustrated confidence and certainty, suggested to siobhan to dimension door out of adaine’s room, like. they came into this making a character with 4 dex. and now the dice deity offered to roll a check to sense if adaine was in danger. making decisions, asking questions, getting invested in the story, trying so hard with the tools they have to save characters from danger; ally beardsley is an incredible d&d player.

#blahblah tried to fly with a ribbon dancer SHUT UP. SHUT UP THEY HAD A VISION. #margaret encino’s call to the guards in battle of the brands is also a good moment #‘bonus action pick up a turtle and kiss it’ is CHARMING and FUNNY and APPRECIATES the art team #i swearrr to god if anyone comments abt them trying to railroad other players' actions. what the fuck do you want from them. #u hate when they play kristen as unserious when she’s literally a teenager with adhd + when theyre literally a comedian on a d&d comedy sho #but if theyre invested in other pc’s welfare youll shut them down too? bffr #ally beardsley you are so special to me #fully aware theyre an adult who likely does not care about people on the internet talking abt how theyre doing their job. as they should #they dont need defending they shouldnt need it people should just be normal abt them and until they are beardsley get behind me #yna.txt #fantasy high junior year spoilers #fhjy spoilers #fantasy high junior year #fhjy #dimension 20 #d20 #ally beardsley

[inkskinned]

crows use tools and like to slide down snowy hills. today we saw a goose with a hurt foot who was kept safe by his flock - before taking off, they waited for him to catch up. there are colors only butterflies see. reindeer are matriarchical. cows have best friends and 4 stomachs and like jazz music. i watched a video recently of an octopus making himself a door out of a coconut shell.

i am a little soft, okay. but sometimes i can't talk either. the world is like fractal light to me, and passes through my skin in tendrils. i feel certain small things like a catapult; i skirt around the big things and somehow arrive in crisis without ever realizing i'm in pain.

in 5th grade we read The Curious Incident of the Dog In The Night-time, which is about a young autistic boy. it is how they introduced us to empathy about neurotypes, which was well-timed: around 10 years old was when i started having my life fully ruined by symptoms. people started noticing.

i wonder if birds can tell if another bird is odd. like the phrase odd duck. i have to believe that all odd ducks are still very much loved by the other normal ducks. i have to believe that, or i will cry.

i remember my 5th grade teacher holding the curious incident up, dazzled by the language written by someone who is neurotypical. my teacher said: "sometimes i want to cut open their mind to know exactly how autistics are thinking. it's just so different! they must see the world so strangely!" later, at 22, in my education classes, we were taught to say a person with autism or a person on the spectrum or neurodivergent. i actually personally kind of like person-first language - it implies the other person is trying to protect me from myself. i know they had to teach themselves that pattern of speech, is all, and it shows they're at least trying. and i was a person first, even if i wasn't good at it.

plants learn information. they must encode data somehow, but where would they store it? when you cut open a sapling, you cannot find the how they think - if they "think" at all. they learn, but do not think. i want to paint that process - i think it would be mostly purple and blue.

the book was not about me, it was about a young boy. his life was patterned into a different set of categories. he did not cry about the tag on his shirt. i remember reading it and saying to myself: i am wrong, and broken, but it isn't in this way. something else is wrong with me instead. later, in that same person-first education class, my teacher would bring up the curious incident and mention that it is now widely panned as being inaccurate and stereotypical. she frowned and said we might not know how a person with autism thinks, but it is unlikely to be expressed in that way. this book was written with the best intentions by a special-ed teacher, but there's some debate as to if somebody who was on the spectrum would be even able to write something like this.

we might not understand it, but crows and ravens have developed their own language. this is also true of whales, dolphins, and many other species. i do not know how a crow thinks, but we do know they can problem solve. (is "thinking" equal to "problem solving"? or is "thinking" data processing? data management?) i do not know how my dog thinks, either, but we "talk" all the same - i know what he is asking for, even if he only asks once.

i am not a dolphin or reindeer or a dog in the nighttime, but i am an odd duck. in the ugly duckling, she grows up and comes home and is beautiful and finds her soulmate. all that ugliness she experienced lives in downy feathers inside of her, staining everything a muted grey. she is beautiful eventually, though, so she is loved. they do not want to cut her open to see how she thinks.

a while ago i got into an argument with a classmate about that weird sia music video about autism. my classmate said she thought it was good to raise awareness. i told her they should have just hired someone else to do it. she said it's not fair to an autistic person to expect them to be able to handle that kind of a thing.

today i saw a goose, and he was limping. i want to be loved like a flock loves a wounded creature: the phrase taken under a wing. which is to say i have always known i am not normal. desperate, mewling - i want to be loved beyond words.

loved beyond thinking.

#spilled ink #writeblr #personal #please don't ask me to talk on my experience on the spectrum lol. i hate how ppl talk to me about it #i really try not to write so specifically about it #bc inevitably someone talks to me like im a child #i think this is the first time i've ever openly identified with it but i've been hinting for years #i might delete this. feels big. #the thing is that being on the spectrum actually IS a spectrum #and if u say ur autistic #inevitably someone makes an assumption about ur needs/symptoms #please do not treat me differently than u usually would. like.... we can tell when you do #and like i mention. i do appreciate the effort. i do truly appreciate the effort. #but it still feels like... #when i was blind. sometimes people kind of did the same-ish thing. #they'd find out i was blind and start talking really loudly? #and while i KNOW they're just trying to help. it would be like. i'd be trying to find #the right way into a building (sometimes only 1 door is unlocked and i couldn't see the signs posted about where to go) #and ppl would be like ''OH UR BLIND? YES SO THIS IS A DOOR. IT OPENS INTO THE BUILDING. IT IS LOCKED NOW." #''A DOOR CAN BE FOUND IN MANY LOCATIONS.'' #and it feels like. when i admit to being autistic #someone comes screeching into my life being like THIS IS A DOOR.

[egophiliac]

redesigning my headcanon for Sebek's parents, based on important new information (SCALES)

(you can't see it but they're both wearing crocs)

#art #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland spoilers #twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers #twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers #they are truly the most inspiring love story of our generation #though i guess he's not dr. zigvolt since zigvolt is the clan name... #unless he took her name which i absolutely could see. why would you ever not want to be called zigvolt. #this does tie nicely in with my headcanon that sebek's siblings got more of the fae features than he did #and he has a Complex about it #i get the impression that sebek's siblings are much closer in age to each other and also have more of their dad's chill #so sebek is sort of the baby of the family and he's got a Complex about that too #i think a lot about the zigvolt family for characters who have never actually appeared #on the subject of actual canon though #i do actually really appreciate that both sebek and silver each had a little moment of reassuring each other #that this is 400 years ago and also incredibly unfortunate circumstances #and present-day reality lilia and baul love them very much #(i do think sebek is secretly baul's favorite grandkid) #it was just nice to see! especially from sebek! he is sometimes a very thoughtful boy and it's always nice to see that side of him #sebek trying SO hard to get baul to like him though 😭 #and lilia being like 'aw i think you're getting kind of fond of him :)' #i love. Characters.

[fluttershiesworld]

[ID: text reading:

Frequently Asked Questions:

How did you become like this? How was your childhood? Do your loved ones find you constantly grating? "Your clinician may ask to talk to family or loved ones to get complete information on the ways that your symptoms are [affecting] you. "Did you know you can lead a normal and fulfilling life? Did you know no one will ever truly love you? Do you know what compassion feels like? Do you care? How does anyone deal with you? How should I talk to you? Wow, you seem so different from everyone else who fits this arbitrary group of symptoms that I vaguely know. Why are you different? Are you special? Are you stupid? Are you human? Are you cursed? Are you monstrous? Are you possessed? Are you made of metal? Is rust eating you from the inside out? Are you a real boy? Are you a real girl? Are you raw meat? Are you beautiful? Are you an angel corrupted by pride upon seeing the shape of god? Are you an abstract painting? How can I make you what I want you to be in my singular narrative? end ID]

frequently asked questions, sunny valentine

#sunspeak #creations #this is about getting diagnosed with gender dysphoria and also bpd! i hope ppl like it #figured im not going to try to publish it so may as well put it out there #rbs notes etc appreciated love you<3 #trans poetry #trans poets on tumblr #trans art #poets on tumblr

[pierog]

tiny comic about eating toast with friends

#i have sooo many more thoughts about this but i couldnt be arsed making a longer comic..a few ppl seemed to relate so i will put it here #comic #art #artists on tumblr #axolotl #studyblr #academia #<-why the fuck not. it's set at uni #furry #mine #personal #i do wish i spent more time on this but i got 80hd #anyway the experience of loved ones + food is so important to me #and those little moments which you don't realise are so special until they're gone #i'm very bad at living in the present.. always have been.. gotta learn to appreciate wot i have #my hall experience was a mixed bag - loads of fun but also problematic as an institution and i dont miss it #im lucky to have heaps of friends who i love :) #but it's my first year as a Real Adult outside of academia and im trying not to be scared of growing up

[crunchycrystals]

credit to u/ioncelostashoe on reddit for this comment i need to post it on here to share

(also would explain why they knew it should stop at 5 rounds)

#crunchyposts #im frantically going through the reddit post rn trying to talk to people lol #game changer #game changer spoilers #tell me if the image id is wrong btw im not great at writing descriptions for things #100 #150 #200 #300 #400 #500 #edit if any of yall were curious i checked the comment again a day later and this post has more notes than that has upvotes #so if you feel like it maybe like share your thoughts w them on reddit???? i feel like they might appreciate it but idk do whatever you wan #i dont have an account im a stalker lol

[wispscribbles]

why are you and your drawings so cool 😭🙏

afdsasdfasg thank you !! irl ppl would laugh at me being called cool lol - Have a ghoap as thanks <33

#ask #chloe-is-slightly-epic #ghostsoap #doodle #i'm trying to get better at letting myself be a bit more open online #a bit more uncool if you will #im an anxious perfectionist so a lot of art and posts end up in drafts forever #like this sketch i drew..... 4 months ago #hope you all wont mind if I start posting a bit more #unfinished work like sketches or fic snippets #Im constantly making stuff and writing but I just dont post #womp womp anxiety #so yeah decidedly uncool but im happy you like my art :') #btw if youve ever sent an ask or asked a question that i've never answered... yeah its probably in my drafts because i got stuck on somethi #and then forgor #and now its been so long that it feels weird to reply #sorry!! I super appreciate everyone who take the time to write

[buglaur]

for a girl whose never built anything from scratch before i'd call this a triumph

#it's safe to say i won't be building ever again. this was painful. #4 houses and a little pub with 2 apartments upstairs #it is fully unfurnished but that is a task too immense for me to tackle right now #and the sides are very bare.. i'll fix that #so excited to play gahhh #i have until the 16th to finish all of my assignments but after that it'll be sims sims sims #do ye have any recommendations on anti-virus software? #i've been using mcafee but it's the most god awful program know to man #the only annoying pop-up ads i get are from mcafee itself #trying to get me to sign up for shit and buy better plans #would appreciate recommendations thank you 🙏

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

💙❤️Happy Holidays!❤️💙

#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #lan wangji #wei wuxian #This is *specifically* fanart of the interfaith christmas cards featuring santa and his jewish rabbi husband spending time together #Why? Well as I was trying to think of things to draw for the season I realized there was another classic Blue and Red pairing to reference #They are going out for chinese food after this photoshoot. Kosher of course. #I want them to star in an interfaith hallmark film. A meet cute + save christmas + murder mystery in a small town kind of story #Or! Maybe they are just going to have a chill holiday break together and bake some treats with the extended family #So many fun possibilities about this bonkers concept I have no intention of making a bigger deal out of #speaking of Big Deals though; #If you have ever wanted to show appreciation for this (free) daily comics blog then I have one Holiday request: #If you have the means to - please donate your money to either a local food bank or a Yemen relief fund #there are so many people going without food and every bit helps. Truly would be the best holiday treat ever #and if you do not celebrate this holiday season…it’s also my birthday! You wouldnt want to let down the birthday cat would you? #(DISCLAIMER: it may or may not actually be my birthday. I may just be pressing emotional buttons to influence people to my cause) #(DISCLAIMER 2: I cannot vouch for any charities you donate to. Please be cautious and research properly before donating)

[wholecakes]

zoro who is so caught off guard by sanji’s kinder actions towards him is one of my favorite tropes. sanji crafting him specialized post workout snacks personally adjusted for him but still down to fight and call him names. he’s still the biggest asshole zoro has ever had the displeasure of knowing, and he’s horribly considerate. he’s a little confused but doesn’t reject any of sanji’s specialized treats. it’s not like sanji is fawning and doting over him like he does nami, so zoro feels like he can cross off sanji actually liking him from his list of reasons as to why sanji is acting like this. but it’s still fucking strange..

meanwhile sanji is in his kitchen wondering how zoro hasn’t taken a damn hint yet

#i always thought sanji was really weird about showing affection to anybody who isnt nami or robin #bcz with them its just second nature like he likes them so much its so easy to shower them in love #meanwhile you have ZORO who is like #‘is that asshole trying to kill me?’ #zoro who thinks its similar to when you get a dog excited to get into the car only for them to go to the vet #thinks sanji is ‘buttering him up’ for his own sick desire #sanji whose sick desire is literally just to make snacks for his crewmate as a display of care #doesnt even have to be romantic just wants to show a bit of appreciation #still tagging as zosan because. luv my babas #zoro: wtf is your problem #sanji who just made him lunch: MY problem?? #zosan #one piece #txt #roronoa zoro #headcanon #sanji #vinsmoke sanji #zoro #prompt

[letsmcfreackingloseit]

So yes I have OF COURSE read @naffeclipse new fic Apex Polarity and yes, I AM OBSESSED!

So I decided to make a little comic of how I think their "first encounter" might have looked like from Eclipse's perspective.

I can't help but think about how alien and scary we most look to him (especially if there is a history of fasco hunting polar sirens in the past). With all that gear we look like emotionless beings, just observing and uncaring of this ice world. But then when y/n shows up and probably exudes this joy and wonder for his world + shows respect for the creatures and the environment??? Mmh yeah, I can see Eclipse falling for y/n, especially considering how alone he might be...

So yes, that's what I have for today! If you want to read the fic I'll link it right here. I can't recommend it enough, but as always, read the tags so you know what you're getting into! And lastly I also want to @themeeplord beacuse Eclipse's design is basically their design in my style (god I love their design so much, their character/creature designs are the BEST) so all the credit goes to them! Polar!Y/N is my design thou! ;P

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go read the two latest chapters-

YIPPEE!!!

#apex polarity #orca!eclipse #polar y/n #dca #dca fandom #I am once again plagued by the terrible ramble disease #but I got thoughts and I wanna share them >:/ #so here are some more: #when I say the humans look alien I mean Grey alien level alien #Emotionless face? Check. Big empty eyes? Check. Studying and probing the inhabitants? Check. Possibly abducts inhabitants? Check #or mad scientist vibe #imagine professor Membrane from Invader Zim while he's saying 'I know better know' <- that kind of vibe #ok- one last thought! #as you can see- I decided to go full out and try coloring and stuff! #and one of the reasons why I decided to do that is because I'm not well practised in those departments- but I want to get better at them! #so if you think this looks like a hot mess- it's because they are XD #but with all this considered- I think I did pretty well! #So I hope you enjoyed it! XD #Now I'm giving all of you who's read ALL OF THIS a giant gold star #because wow- you're dedication and focus is absolutely INSANE and I appreciate you taking the time to read this #NOW GO AND BE FREE MY FRIEND!!!

[zarla-s]

So I spent the last couple days making a HeavyMedic fansite and it is the most ELABORATE SITE I'VE EVER MADE and I'm so unbearably proud of it, it looks SO COOL!! Especially the Fictracker page!! It's even responsive!! You have no idea how long it took to get everything looking right and spacing it and everything. I've never made a site that looks this fancy before! I'M SO PROUD OF IT LOOK AT IT!! LOOK AT IT!!! LOOK AT IIIITTTT plz

Also made some link buttons! Still don't really have an official name for the site as it is but WHATEVER maybe I'll decide on one later. YOU CAN USE THESE TO LINK TO IT FROM YOUR OWN SITE you have your own site right, you should make onneeee (here are some resources if you don't know how) and if it's a TF2 site TELL ME AND I WILL LINK BACK TO IT

[patreon]

#team fortress 2 #heavymedic #red oktoberfest #there are some easter eggs on the site too :3 #try and find them!! #i just have this open in a tab and keep looking at it and being like man this is so cool #web design can be so tedious and yet so rewarding #have a new appreciation for how slick the tf2 ui is #absolute goldmine for site design #lol comparing this to the huntersmoker site or ghost tutorial that's as barebones as you can get

[aquanutart]

#wind waker #loz #zelda #beedle #linktober #link #aquanutart #day 1: merchant #i really liked beedle in the wind waker he just always seemed so genuinely enthusiastic and happy to see you #i thought his compliment card was hilarious. i always bought a lot of bait anyway to complete my sea chart #and because i liked messing around as a bird i guess i'd buy hyoi pears; so i always racked up enough points without really trying #however i wasn't a fan of what they did with his character in games after that. he became pressuring and insincere #i understand why people would find a two-faced salesman character funny or interesting in his own right #but it's the opposite of what i originally liked about him #unfortunately this makes me question whether it was meant that way to begin with? #i don't know but i like to believe wind waker beedle actually meant his enthusiasm #back when ww beedle was the only beedle i always meant to show appreciation for him so i'm doing that now

[uncanny-tranny]

If somebody in your life offers to knit or crochet or, really, create anything for you, please be an active participant in the creation of the piece they are making. I adore making and gifting things, but nothing bums me out quicker than a person who passively just goes "okay," to my ideas about what I'm making them - it can send the message that they won't like it, or that they don't care, even if they're happy about my offering. The back-and-forth feedback is a great way to make sure that you are being gifted something that was truly worth the time, effort, expertise, and money that will inevitably go into the gift!

I know it's really hard to be an active participant, believe me, I'm an anxious ball of horror, but it will only do good for both parties to interact in this situation. It is a big deal to be offered a hand-crafted gift, but it's also something we want you to love and use, and that can only happen if you tell us what would make you fall in love with what we create.

#advice #relationships #art #fiber art #knitting #crochet #i always try to remember that some people's responses to something big is to clam up and become more passive... #..i just want to remind you that you aren't in danger of Ruining Everything by suggesting things or asking questions or saying what YOU wan #like i asked my dad specifically how he would feel if i made him items SPECIFICALLY so i could gauge if he would like them for instance #i don't just want to create something i want the recipient to actually LIKE it #which is why i typically (not always) ask how somebody would feel about me giving them a specific gift #i know some people genuinely don't care in the sense that they would appreciate ANYTHING but sometimes that doesn't always translate i gues #im crocheting a set of coasters for my dad and i really hope hell truly like them because i'm not sure based on how he responded to my ideas #it makes me so happy to gift things but it's with the caveat that the recipient will think it is An Amazing Gift That Is SO Good And Useful

[willowser]

on the topic of princely bakugou—

i love the idea of his hand in marriage being the peace offering between your kingdom and his clan, as in he comes to live with you and rule in your castle. and he genuinely wants to do a good job; he's not coming in and tearing down the walls or defiling shrines or anything like that, because that would be the easiest way to lose good graces with his new realm.

the thing that i love the most about this is him being so barbaric, raised in a completely different way from you, taught to value different things and rule a different way—and yet he's sitting with his council (half of which are appointed men that swear loyalty to the realm regardless of who rules, and the other half being men he specifically chose and trusts) dressed in his furs and boots, scars out for all to see, and he's carefully trying to read letters and documents and negotiations, like a civil man would.

and it's not that he's changing anything about himself; he is firmly, to the core, always going to be a wild little barbarian pup—but he's grown enough to know the difference between respect and surrender. to know that he will be nothing without the support of the people, and to lose that after fighting so hard for it would be foolish.

he's very different than you expected, than you were ever taught to expect; your shared bed is too soft for him and he tosses and turns all night and gets up before the sun rises; he cooks, and you've found him fiddling around in the kitchen on more than one occasion; he values your opinion on a multitude of matters, and speaks to you more about politics than your father ever did.

you were told that he'd ravage you in the dirt, dripping sweat and the blood of your people, but—he hasn't laid a hand on you, hardly speaks to you unless it's absolutely necessary. you can almost feel it, though, sitting in his throat when you're across from him at the dinner table, or when he sits at the edge of the bed and looks back at you over his shoulder.

everything he does is so careful, thought out, and you think he might be doing the same with you, too. not barging in or breaking down doors, but waiting, patiently, for you to open up your heart to him.

#i just love the idea of big beefy barbarian man sitting at a desk with paper and ink #he's doing his best !!!! to do it right !!!!!! #he wants to actually be a good king !!! it matters to him !!!! #and good kings do not burn their kingdoms to the ground and raze the lands and nuture hatred from their people !!!! #he's trying to be respectful 🥺🥺🥺 #how could you not appreciate that 🥺🥺🥺🥺 #and maybe he thinks you're so pretty 😔 and so intelligent about political matters 😔 and he's a little intimidated akfbfuhskaqk #✿ thoughts: bakugou

[vole-mon-amour]

x

#neil newbon #this gives me a VERY heavy heart #astarion #bg3 #beating a trauma survivor is always so fucking hard #and i feel that bc you experienced that pain and abuse and decided to try and find a better version of yourself #you also understand how it is for other people and you try to act with care #maybe that's why he's trying to be so understanding and so forthcoming #i respect and appreciate him for that #even how he himself wants to hug astarion #I'm FEELING #*being a trauma survivor #ugh