Being fat, actually fat, with an eating disorder is fucking hell.
People assume you have BED, and if you actually do have BED people are so gross about it. If you have a restricting disorder people get concerned when you start eating more. People get concerned if you start to like yourself. People love to see you fucking miserable, and will completely ignore your misery in the same breath. It makes them feel good. They benefit at your expense through weight stigma.
So many physicians prescribe disordered eating to us. ED specialists in many places won’t even consider how EDs affect us. Our own community uses our bodies as inspiration to hurt themselves. Because nothing could be worse than looking like us, right? How are you supposed to love yourself when so many people actively don’t want you to?
To the fat person reading who needs to hear this, I give a shit if you recover. I give a shit that you are hurting. So many people don’t notice, so many don’t give a fuck, but I do. You deserve better. I want you to eat even if it means you gain weight. I want you to be happy in your body as it is. I want you to feel loved, I want you to feel seen.
If you are fat with BED, I see you. There is so much stigma and it is not your fault. Your weight isn’t “your fault”, you are sick. It’s not a moral failing. You deserve compassion, and the extent to which people project their own issues onto you is awful. You deserve to be comfortable in your skin, and your body is wonderful.
If you are fat with purging tendencies, or with restricting ones I see you too. We get praised for hurting ourselves, or no one notices. I see you. I’m sorry.
I wish so badly the world were more compassionate to you, but if no one else gives a shit, I do. Fight for recovery for me, even though I know that journey can be so, so lonely when you aren’t thin.
To those of you who have recovered, to those of you that may. You are worth it. You may be fat for the rest of your life, and that’s okay. It’s wonderful, your body is wonderful, and I see you and I’m proud of you. Sadly I know many of us recover alone, but I hope you know you aren’t. I’m rooting for you.
2K notes
·
View notes
I'm actually begging thin people to make fat characters. You have so much power to normalize fatness by simply not making every one of your OCs thin (whether it's thin and dainty or thin and muscular).
More specifically, I want to see characters who are fat and are quick and quiet and have high dexterity. Characters who are large and burly and something other than a brute-force melee class. Make fat elves and nymphs and succubi, not just dwarves and orcs. Make fat characters with complex personalities. Don't have every fat woman 'make up for it' by having an extreme hourglass figure. Make fat characters who are desirable and loved.
But also, on a related note: please make characters who love to eat well, regardless of their size, and do not make it into a joke or a goofy trait. Make characters who go on long traveling quests and don't magically lose weight from all the walking, because not all bodies work like that. Make characters gain weight as a sign that they are physically or emotionally healing. Don't have every character refuse to eat as a tell when they are upset. Don't be afraid to have characters enjoy food. Please.
840 notes
·
View notes
people say that eds are terrible and terrifying, but I've been in mine for so long that it's comforting more than anything else. there's something safe about scrolling through thinspo, something about body checks that feels like a hug, something about the empty feeling that feels like home. idk. i just know I'm not ready to let go of that yet.
2K notes
·
View notes