#shusaku i’m sorry who

[writingwithcolor]

Am I fetishizing my Japanese character?

noedandelion asked:

Hello ! I’m currently writing a comic where my main character is a mixed Asian/white man, to be more specific, he is half Portuguese half Japanese. And it’s there that i’m asking myself a question.

I’m consuming a little of pop culture from japan (I say little bc it’s not the same as when i was younger) and because of this i’m kinda worried that this could be seen as fetishism of Japanese people, he’s not the only Japanese character in the comic bc i have a lot of characters and i try to include several characters who share the same ethnicity. As my mains, he is the only one, not the only Asian character but they are not Japanese (he is not not the only main protag but he is more central, i hope i’m clear sorry).

I’ve never have any people told me it was not okay but bc i’m white, i’d like to have feedback. I don’t remember why i make him Japanese because i have him for a while, but i know it has nothing to do with worshiping of Japanese people. I’m writing him as fully developed character, he as flaws, qualities, things he likes and his development is not related to the fact he is miked or anything, i’m learning Japanese culture, tropes etc for writing him respectfully (and i ofc don’t use anime as reference of representation).

I’ve always seen people tell “as long as the character is written respectfully it’s okay” but maybe there’s things I don’t know that are fetishization, like well writing a Japanese character when you’re white and consume a little of Japanese pop culture/like to learn about Japanese history culture etc. (i’m actually learning about a lot of different culture not just the Japanese one but still).

I was thinking also that if it could be seen as such, i could change the fact that is half Japanese and make him from an another Asian country as ethnicity (east or south-east Asian), i don’t want to whitewash him (i will rework my character of course to be accurate bc it will not be the same culture), but i don’t know if it’s okay.

So should i keep my character the way he is ? (and be careful of how i’m writing him as I do with every character i have) or should i change it ? Thank you for your time and I hope you have a great day. (I’m sorry for my english, I’m italian so my first language is not english)

When people say “Write a character respectfully”, they often mean “Write the character as if you were treating that character with the level of respect you would want accorded to a character from your background.” 

In my experience, many individuals from European countries, like their American counterparts, do not have the requisite knowledge of cultures outside of their own background to create characters from many other cultures in this fashion. This is rarely bad intent. Rather you can’t know what you don’t know. Fetishization, particularly, is often the result of lazy/ ignorant writing, and ignorance is often linked to poor research or limited education. Japanese pop culture, for instance, does not remotely qualify as education in Japanese history or culture.  It’s hard to write a well-developed character if you have difficulty understanding the way their culture and background might (or might not) affect who they are. 

If you are new to this blog, you likely haven’t yet heard that:

We are not a great source of information for people in the early stages of research (These are called Google Scholar and Wikipedia)

You will often only be able to ask good questions after you have done considerable research

Are you planning on distributing or sharing this comic to others at this stage? My advice is that if you have all these doubts about what is or isn’t fetishization that you keep this character to yourself and play around with his development on your own while you do more research:

Read notable literature by Japanese writers in Japan

Read literature by members of the Japanese diaspora (ex. Kazuo Ishiguro, Shusaku Endo, Ruth Ozeki)

Consume nonfiction content on or by mixed Japanese people (Eg. Hafu: film, 2013, Naomi Osaka: 2021, docuseries, When Half is Whole: book, Stephen Murphy-Shigemitsu) 

Becoming familiar with a wide range of Japanese experiences is the easiest remedy for fetishization. I’m also going to make the unusual suggestion that you read up on Japanese food culture (Knowing the number of Italians I do, food is something that weirdly helps us understand each other very quickly). 

A common in-joke between me and the other moderators is my suggestion that if an asker is unsure whether or not they should write something that they should: 

Create a secret room with a door only they can open

Wear a disguise that hides their identity (I often suggest a plague doctor’s mask)

Write their story in invisible ink from the comfort of this environment. 

This is obviously an absurd idea, but who will judge you for something they don’t know about? Similarly, who is harmed if no one knows what you are doing and it doesn’t affect anyone else? The purpose of this blog is not to tell you what is right or wrong, but rather to help you create content that a wide variety of individuals can appreciate, regardless of their background. Whether you think that is important is purely your choice. 

In summary: If you worry about whether or not you are fetishizing your character, do more research. This applies to all of your non-Italian characters, including the Asian ones. Learn as much as you can about their backgrounds as you develop them, and then consult us again when you better understand what else you want to ask us. 

- Marika. 

#japan #Japanese men #fetishization #Japanese culture #creator responsibility #writer resources #recommendations #asks

[iohourtime]

Yamada Ryosuke x Kotaki Nozomu: Approach

QLAP 2018.01

Thanks to 草莓要配白巧克力 on Weibo for the clear scans. The photo is from Keitoholic on Weibo.  I went slightly fast and loose with this translation, so please let me know if there are any errors.

The two are co-starring in Yamada's drama. For someone who publicly declared “I love Yamada-kun” for a long time, Kotaki-kun was overwhelmed with joy?!

I want to see your frustrated expressions live on set!

--- The two of you will be co-starring for the first time in the new drama “Momikeshite Fuyu ~ Wagaya no Mondai Nakatta Koto Ni” (Cover Up Winter ~ there are no problems in our family, or “Momifuyu”). As we are getting closer to crank in, how do you feel right now? (The interview took place in early December)

Kotaki: Ah~ I'm getting nervous! Even now, I am very nervous. That's because I'm sitting next to such a cool person.

Yamada: Really? (Laughs)

Kotaki: Really!

--- In this project, Yamada-kun plays the elite police officer, Kitazawa Shusaku, and Kotaki-kun plays a kouhai of Shusaku, Ozeki Koki. What are your impressions of your respective roles?

Yamada: As a police officer, Shusaku has an image of excellence, but that is just the face he put out there. At home, he has a super accomplished brother and a super strong willed sister, so Shusaku is at the bottom of the bottom (laughs). I think I'm going to enjoy playing that gap.

Kotaki: It is surprising that Yamada-kun is playing such a role. He gives off this capable vibe at work, and he's someone with a strong star aura, so to see him treated this way in the drama by his family ...

Yamada: That's a fresh look, right?

Kotaki: Really quite fresh. Also, I think that it will be absolutely fascinating to watch you act desperately from a really weak position and show various expressions due to frustration, I definitely want to see those things live on set! (excited)

--- That’s a special privilege of the co-star (laughs). How about Kotaki-kun's role?

Kotaki: I'm one of the kouhais under Shusaku, although you don't get the sense that he is a kouhai. Ozeki is also a young, capable person at work and is considered the “hope” [of the department], so I want to challenge [portraying the role] with a sense of enthusiasm and confidence. Also, because I am in a special group called "SIT", I  want to look fearless when I wear a helmet,  so I think I will do some muscle training and lose some weight.

Yamada: But Ozeki has scenes where he wears a suit, right?

Kotaki

: There ... is?

Yamada: I watched the drama “Sekai Ichi Muzukashi Koi” (The World's Most Difficult Romance) in which Kotaki co-starred with Ohno (Satoshi)-kun. Even though [your character] wore a suit, he was a goofball, right? While [Ozeki] is also wearing a suit this time, I look forward to seeing what different character you will play.

Kotaki: Pressure! (Laughs) Although, the script is also quite interesting, and whether there are parts where you snicker or parts where you laugh, I hope there are lots of interaction between Shusaku and Ozeki.  I am already excited.

Yamada: In the scenes they have together, there are places where they are earnest, and there are other places where you think “what a bunch of idiots~!” For now, I am looking forward to Ozeki's drunk scene. As we are about to start shooting, what kind of acting will Nozomu show us, I think Nozomu’s fans will especially want to know. I think it will definitely be one of the highlights.

Kotaki: Due to my earnestness, I may have said something I do not have to say... it looks like.

Yamada: “Is that guy for real?!“ is the typical feeling [about him].  Hang in there!

Kotaki: I will do my best! (Laughs)

I jokingly said "Did you grow taller?" (Laughs)

--- Do you get together in private?

Kotaki: There were many opportunities for us to eat together for a while now, and I think we are gradually becoming closer. But I admired Yamada-kun since before I entered Johnny’s, so when I was still a junior and Hey! Say! JUMP was having a concert in Osaka, I thought “it would be nice to meet him even for just a little while”. I was one with the fans (laughs).

Yamada: But now, when we meet [in music programs or other events], he will jokingly say "Oi Ryusuke! Did you grow a little?” (laughs)

Kotaki: Well, it only happened because I was with the members [of Johnny’s West]! (Panicking) I would absolutely not say that had I not have back-up [from my group members]!

Yamada: It looks like you can get away with it when the members are around?

Kotaki

: That 's right. I was caught in the moment (laughs).

Yamada: But that's Nozomu’s cute side (laughs)!  I am envious because I am not the type who can act like that with senpais, it is unexpectedly nice for the senpais.

Kotaki: Oh, are you sure?

Yamada: Yeah.

Kotaki

: You are not angry I called you Ryosuke in e-mail, right?

Yamada: Yeah. I guess you were getting a little carried away.

Kotaki: I got a little carried away with email. Sorry!! (Panicking)

Yamada: Liar (laughs).  Also, Nozomu, when I take you out for a meal, you will eat like everything is super delicious. You will say, "It’s delicious! It’s delicious!" (laughs). I think that makes people feel comfortable.

Kotaki: Wow! I'm happy~ !! (Thankful) I'm feeling really happy (laughs).

--- Kotaki-kun, with this collaboration, are you likely to further shorten the distance between you and Yamada-kun?

Kotaki: It’s not like I can keep calling him "Oi Ryosuke!" on set when everybody is around (Laughs). I don’t know, say, a meaningless skinship?.......

Yamada: Nozomu, you got it~! Like mysteriously touching the butt (laughs).

Kotaki: [Saying] "Good morning!" and then smoothly touching your shoulder.

Yamada: Casualness is good.

Kotaki: By the way, when I was co-starring with Ohno-kun, I would say "Good morning!" and "Good job today!" 3 times a day.

Yamada

: That’s annoying! Ohno-kun was kind enough to accept that, probably! (Laughs)

Kotaki: The last time, he responded with "I'm fine~ (forced laugh)". But as much as I am annoying, he must have been a little happy.

Yamada: That is difficult ... (laughs).

Kotaki: Ahahahahaha!

Yamada: If it were me, I won’t forgive you until the third day.

Kotaki: And then ignore me after that?

Yamada: I will pretend you are not there.

Kotaki: Oh, I am air! (Laughs)

---It will be interesting to see how useful Kotaki-kun’s strategy will be.

Kotaki: I will try my best without hesitation! Also, during [the filming of] this drama, I think I am going to eat with Yamada-kun one-on-one. Up to now, we have not gone out to eat with just the two of us.

Yamada: Well, maybe there hasn’t been any one-on-one [meals].

Kotaki: That's right. So somehow, it will need to happen this time! Like the two characters in the drama, I want to be able to talk with you about all sorts of things one-on-one.

Yamada: I hope our first two-person meal will happen during this shoot.

Kotaki: Thank you!!

----

Site Report: From the first day, there were a lot of smiles and teamwork.

Shusaku (Yamada) cranked in at the workplace. Yamada appeared fresh faced even though he was recording another variety program until late last night. Starting with the director, it was a set full of familiar staff, and [people were] chatting, joking and relaxing. The director said, "Everyone, please call [Yamada-kun] unit chief!  Unit Chief Kitazawa!", he subconsciously smiled at those instructions; the set was in a cheerful mood from the first day.

A crank in that was full of unintentional smiles

(Yamada)

When the director asked [Yamada] to say a few words, he said “Eh? I didn’t know about that!” and started panicking.  "It is a cold winter, so let's keep on working hard to not catch a cold!", he greeted everyone.  After that, the director said "Congratulations on Kohaku!", and he smiled shyly.

Since this is a comedy, he first discussed the comical acting style with the director and then did some pattern testing; making adjustments along the way.  In one scene where he had to paced back and forth, he was instructed to “come back like a squirrel”; he did it with amazing precision that will even put the little creatures to shame (laughs).

(Kotaki)

Kotaki also cranked in on this day.  Being nervous about acting with an admired senpai for the first time, he considered many facial expressions.  However, after taking a cut, Yamada made a fantastic and smiley face.  The director also praised him, saying “it’s great”, and he said “Yes” while feeling pretty good!

In a scene where he had to stamp documents, in the actual cut, he dropped the stamp.  He said “I dropped it (laughs)” as he got his first NG.  “Rebellious period*?”, the director made a bad pun joke.  He said “It is a great start to the morning! (laughs)” while cringing?!

*Rebellious period is hanko-ki in Japanese.  Hanko is a type of stamp in Japan. So the director was really saying “Stamp time?” in reference to the scene, making this a pretty bad pun.  I looked this up in the bad pun database, which is a thing!

#yamada ryosuke #kotaki nozomu #momikeshite fuyu #momifuyu #interview #QLAP 2018.01

[panadabro]

Rough translations of Owari no Seraph Chapter 55 PART 2

Page 22 Yu: ...I'll carry Akane Yoichi: Yu-kun Shinoa: Yu-san Yu: ...It's not like that I have no thoughts on this. The medicine Ferid injected me with had an effect, at that time I didn't feel my demon/oni Narumi: How many times did you put your comrades in danger because of your egoism? Crowley: No it's enough Page 23 Crowley: Yu has to come down with us anyway. To kill a 5th Progenitor we need the power in Yu, it's a exercise to control it If his violence bursts out here, we'll cut off his limbs to stop him. Page 24 Narumi: ...Damn it Even if he says so, then do it Yu: Sorry Narumi. But I want to meet my family Page 25 Yu: So please stop me if I have a violent outburst. Narumi: Just don't burst out. And you don't have to apologise Yu: Hm? Narumi: Since I know that feeling very well Yu: Alright Page 26 Yoichi: Yu-kun Ah~Wait a second. For just in case. Calm down a bit. Page 28 Yu: ...I'm sorry Akane, that I escaped alone..... Page 29 Yu: But, I'll definitely revive you. Mika: Yu-chan you cannot resurrect people. And even if they got revived Page 30 Mika: Many worse things will happen. You've seen the face of that Guren guy at the airport, right?If Ferid's story is true the world, because of that guy- Yu: Mika I don't really care about this world Mika: .... Yu: So I can understand Guren's feelings ...Ruined, this is exactly how Ferid thinks Page 31 Mika: Yu-chan, I want to save you Yu: Me too, I want to save you as well. I'll promise that I'll even sell the planet to make you human again Mika: ...That's Yu: And Akane, the kids, Narumi's family and Kimzuki's sister, I will bring them all back. Crowley: And let the world be destroyed because of your egoism Page 32 Crowley: That's an incredible greed, just like the devil Yu's mother: You are the devil!!You are the devil's spawn!! So you have to die!! Yu: I, don't care as what you call me, the devil a monster I like it As long as I can protect my family The family who accepted someone like me... Everyone here is my family. Crowley: Then let's go met this family Page 34 Yu: ...Everyone is here, everyone... Mika: Yu-chan Page 35 Mika: [No tears want to come out] [But] [I only have to protect Yu-chan...] Narumi: Shusaku...  ...Definitely Page 36 Shinoa: Is that a person you know?Crowley: ...That...ah what happened, since Ferid-kun's character isn't good Shinoa: Do you also want to revive the dead? Crowley: Vampires don't have those desires anymore, that's why we can manage the "Seraph of the End" Shinoa: So does it mean that the method to control the "Seraph of the End" inside of Yu-san, is here? Pahw 37 Shinoa: ....the crest of the Demon Army. But to decrypt these research datas take a long time... Crowley: They say, there are people on the way to help, your comrade. Shinoa: ...Comrade? But there aren't any... Page 38 Shinya: Where are we? Guren: You should know if you look at it. A ghost house

#seraph of the end #owari no seraph #yuichiro hyakuya #mikaela hyakuya #akane hyakuya #shinoa hiiragi #yoichi saotome #shiho kimizuki #mitsuba sangu #narumi makoto #shusaku iwasaki #crowley eusford #ferid bathory #guren ichinose #shinya hiragi #rough translation #spoilers #chapter 55

[lordgeales]

One entire year at Tumblr :D

DEAL WITH IT

An entire year at Tumblr running a rp blog for a vampire that we now know.. A tiny bit about. Instead of just a whole lot of nothing. When I think about it, I don’t think that much has changed, but looking back... It has. Back when I started up, I honestly had no idea how the customs of tumblr RPs worked. I didn’t know about rules, formatting posts, icons... Honestly NOTHING at all. I’m still amazed that no one yelled at me. 

I think I caught on pretty quickly tho, four months later, I made this blog. Changing from a sideblog, to a main. And boy, that changed a lot. With that came the new icons(why did I decide to go all out with them... Whhyyy), promos, rules, a design(that is very old holy-), and everything a RP’er should have. At least according to tumblr. 

Although I have to say that I still felt a bit alone being on tumblr. I never really got to speak to people OOC, and the ones I reached out to.. Oboi (((: Let’s forget about that. It gradually became better. In May I met what I’d call my first “tumblr friend”. Who unfortunately isn’t very active RP-wise anymore.

December was wild compared to the rest of my time. Starting with a meme that led to me getting to talk with Lily(@elyon-kurae​), not to mention the dear Vero(@monophagia​) joining in on the RP :D! That has led to yet another chain event, and I’m very much involved in the RP community now. I think I finally understand what it’s all about.

And although I’ve been through a lot, weeks of inactivity, spikes of activity and shitposting, tons of asks, lack of asks.. Hm, well, we’re still here. I still have the pleasure of talking to most of the people I did back in the days, and a lot of new to call friends.

The people I’ve been interacting with through the time under the cut. Read at own risk it’s very... Long.

People listed in the correct order they appeared at my blog c;

@lestkarrkingofeurope: Starting out with a strange RP on a drawing I won(reblogged just before this post~). I have no idea what we were doing, but it was a lot of fun! Also the reason I even stumbled into this community to begin with. Lately I’ve had the pleasure of being... blessed a lot. Save me from my sins, oh holy tsunami.

@forgottenprogenitor: I think you came along with Lest, with your former muse, Akane. I adored that RP, giving me a chance to show some of Urds more gentle sides. Akihiko was the absolute breakthrough though, I adore him. I love our interactions, and look forwards to yet another year!

@tatsu-rose-bathory: YOU CAME WITH A FLOWECROWN! I remember that much :D! It took a few weeks before we eventually interacted, but I was pretty much in love with Tatsu from the start(still very much am). I really enjoy reading about her, not to mention their occasional small talk they do nowadays. It’s so nice having someone around that Urd actually looks at with gentle eyes ;-;

@makotonarumi/@dusksovereign​: Unfortunately no longer active, but just for the sake of people reading it - Holy fUCK?! When you first reached out to me I was soooo confused. Still am. You are/were an amazing writer, and honestly I felt so bad whenever I wrote replies, because.. Ah, I didn’t feel worthy at all. You were extremely nice to me, however, sending me all kinds of anon-love, tagging me in memes... Ahh. Thank you so much. I don’t think you know how much it meant to me. Just. Thank you. And I’m sorry for being such a slob with the replies.

@ferid-trash-bathory/@shusaku: Turns out you’ve been around forever. Through it all. Wow. Sometimes I do wonder just how bad of an impression i left back then *lol*. Ah, I remember us talking every now and then, it’s just lately I’ve come to know you for “real”. I really like your portrayal of “Fred”, not to mention Shusaku.... Who I might have been a bit mean to back then.... *coughs* Aha, but I’ve been sure that you were nice for a very long time. Still very happy that I reached out to you about the Egypt AU. Although Vero was dying in the background. Best meme lord. Also someone I can always trust to help Urd get revenge on Saito. Gotta get back at that ass amirite.

@mrsaitou: “My first real Tumblr friend” ahh. I really miss having you around. We talked a lot about... I don’t even know. But we talked a lot. I can’t even remember if it started in May, where the first meme with you were tagged, or if we started talking later on. I think I have your personal somewhere... Might dig that out sometimes soon to hear what you’re up to.

krultepxs: Deactivated, unfortunately... A Krul I had tons of fun with, planning all kind of strange stuff. Urd keeping Krul a prisoner after her treason in the Kremlin. An AU where they had to marry. Unfortunately we never got to RP, or plan that much due to me going hiatus for a few weeks. 

@lvstforblood​: OKAY WE BONDED OVER A MEME... And then never talked again. Rip. But if you ever feel like rp’ing, you know where to find me. Winks at.

@asurayuucentral​/@perfectasura​: I can’t even remember when you started coming around tbh, but we haven’t interacted that much. Still I feel like you’re kinda my friend, and I love to see your little likes and crack reblogs ;-;! Also I’d love to rp with you some more whenever!

@erisblonde​: Wonder if you’re still around and into the fandom? We’ve theorized a lot about Urd ahh... Unfortunately it kinda died out - probably due to me going inactive. I tend to do that a lot, huh... Just know, that if you feel like talking theories, hit me up. Anytime. Anyday.

@riddlemehiss/@dil-a-to-ry: WOOP! MY FAVORITE CAT! Okay I was kinda skeptic when The Cheshire cat waltzed into my askbox. But surprisingly I really enjoy his interactions with Urd. You play him amazingly, like holy shit. I’ve enjoyed every single second. Also you’re a really nice person, I think I still see you around every now and then, although Cheshire is on Hiatus. But if you ever feel like reviving him... You can count on Urd to be confused by his lack of respect for gravity :P!

@masterofzawarudo: Can I just say that I love everything about Dio. Although Urd doesn’t. In fact he’s probably annoyed by every single fiber of his being. Sorry for not reaching out to you more often, you’re seriously awesome. Although I find it kinda hard to connect on the strength-level, since our muses come from such different verses. BUT AS LONG AS THEY DON’T FIGHT I’M UP FOR ANYTHING. COME FIGHT ME! YA! wait, don’t do that. Fuck. Also I don’t follow you because I don’t watch Jojo, and you post so much stuff about that rip, still love your blog tho

@kruliisms: Hmmm... Here’s where I’m in doubt. I never wrote it down anywhere, but are you perhaps Krultepxs? Ah, I don’t know. What I know for sure, is that we never really got back to RP’ing, and that you’ve gone inactive yet again. But just to let you know, if you ever feel like doing something with Urd - you’re more than welcome to hit me up :)!

@krullish: Hmm... I think we planned something a while back, but never got around to do it? But anyway, if you feel like RPing with the... shitty russian vampire lord, well... Here I am. Still around c;!

@repulsc: EEEYYYYYYY CASCADA AND LATE NIGHT SHIT POSTING! That my jam. Also chain kinks. I did not say that. I don’t think we’ve ever done anything aside from shitposting and endless icon threads of stare-battles. Always up for more. Or smth serious, whatever you feel like. Winks very hard at.

@brassboundvalkyrie: I think I first noticed you for real when you commented on a picture of me(the mun), however I never really got around to talk to you. Unfortunately our muses are not very compatible orz! BUT HEY! Suddenly you were there, yelling to me about Vero, and whelp... I accidentally joined. Whops. You’re a real nice person, and I looove your Horn. Hope she’ll find a Crowley soon. Until then, I’ll suffer in silence with you. Looking forwards to meeting you c;! Just... No straw, and no masks, k?

@wintersoldier-barnes: Wiggles eyebrows Please send me more Urd. Send me all the Urd. I love the Urd. Gimme the Urd. Urd drug buddy. Also yet another sinner of the SaiUrd squad. Feel free to send me (n)Urds at any times, or just anything in general. You’re amazing to talk to, so~! Also you’re a really pretty Urd holy shit

@rk-silverknight: You just fit in here for some strange reason, because Noblesse yass! We’ve never interacted ic, but you’re still a really nice person! I hope we’ll get to talk some more sometimes in the future. Or perhaps break the bundaries between our muses worlds... Who knows. Perhaps they could actually get along.... Or just have a silent starring contest. 

@elyon-kurae: I can’t even... How did we go from relationship meme to... Talking about high and low? You are an adorable person, and.. So sorry for ruining your innocence orz! BUT EYY SAIURD BUDDY~! Also corner buddy, Tumblr sis, and everything really. I like you tons <3

@rigr-stafford: It’s really nice to have you around! I know we haven’t talked much ooc, but just stretching a leggi out and saying EY I LIKE YOU TOO! Looking forwards to our future interactions!

@borntobeafangirlxd: I think it’s really cute how you manage to like my posts all the time. Aaahhh, you probably have no idea how much it means to me! I’m so happy you like my portrayal, 

@monophagia: How the fuck did the tag “Another traitor has joined the game~” END UP IN A THREAD WITH MIKU, A TV BEING IMPALED BY A SPOON, AND MAKEOUT ON THE BLOODY FLOOR?! KJLaslfhalskfd. I cannot. Even. Just... Lol. Also you liking that Saito-rp-partner ask, and actually making a blog for him is probably the best thing that happened in my whole Tumblr history. You almost deserve a whole post by itself, so I’ll just stop before it gets too long lol. I love u bby, and I fucking adore your Saito. Be it angsty human Saito who gets way too dramatic whenever Urd ignores him, the priest who adores his pharaoh way too much, or the canon-vampire with his weird pudding obsession. You’re a joy to write with, and honestly I’m amazed we’re still keeping it up. I’M SO HAPPY YOU REACHED OUT TO ME?! OK SEE U IN LIKE... SOON. Don’t kidnap me for too long when I come to Germany tho. I cannot German. 

@playfulprogenitor: For some reason I can’t tag you? BUT just want to let you know, that you’re free to swing by anytime! It was really fun seeing you join in on the shitposting! 

@lacus-owns-you: We actually interacted through your OC @louischerel long before I even knew that it was you on that Lacus account. HELLO MOMMY! You’re a joy to talk to, and although we rarely RP, I still enjoy haning out with you ooc <3!

@hiiragi-yukine: Aaah you seem so nice! Although we haven’t really spoken outside the RPs, I really enjoy your OC. Also Yukine as faceclaim doesn’t make it any worse noragamiftwamirite.

@ALL THE PEOPLE I PROBABLY FORGOT

Thank you so much for following me! And I’m so sorry if I forgot you, I had to go through a lot of posts, so I probably did orz.

@ALL MY ANONS

I LOVE YOU TONS THANKS FOR ALL THE ASKS THANKS FOR THE SUPPORT

AND THANK YOU FOR LOVING URDS BUTT I know it’s amazing

He secretly loves you too

#ooc #THANK YOU GUYS #FOR AN AMAZING YEAR #HOPE TO HAVE YET ANOTHER #SMOOCHES TO ALL OF YOU #AND SCREAMS AT ALLLLL PEOPLE OUT THERE #I probably forgot like.. Everyone lol #rip me #lestkarrkingofeurope #forgottenprogenitor #tatsu-rose-bathory #makotonarumi #dusksovereign #ferid-trash-bathory #shusaku #mrsaitou #krultepxs. #lcstforblood #asurayuucentral #perfectasura #erisblonde #riddlemehiss #dil-a-to-ry #masterofzawarudo #kruliisms #krullish #repulsc #brassboundvalkyrie #wintersoldier-barnes #rk-silverknight

[nakaharaxchuuya-blog]

@silxntrabiddog

Chuuya looked over his lover’s shoulder; Akutagawa was pinning him against a tree, the knife on his throat stinging and the thin streak of blood making his skin itchy, but at least he wasn’t having his throat immediately cut. 

Yet.

The man standing behind Akutagawa was for all means and purposes mediocre. Quite tall, young, with a perfectly tailored suit and a pair of glasses in thick, black frames; he gave off the impression of a middle-class, boring office worker, who loved numbers more than anything and considered his nine-to-five work heaven on Earth. And yet there was something sinister in the glint that shone in his light, almost yellow eyes; the only feature characteristic of him. 

“...who the fuck are you?” Chuuya growled, though his demanour was calm and steady. He calculated his possibilities; calculated his options; wondered about the variables. This was action; Chuuya was good and getting out of situations like these. For now, all he wanted to know is what he had to do to make sure Akutagawa will get out of this with him. “...no matter, actually. No one’s gonna give a shit what your name was once I’m fucking done with you. Now let Ryuu go, and maybe I’ll consider killing you painlessly, bastard.”

The man simply smiled at him; a gentle, warm smile of a librarian that looked way too off paired with these sinister, somewhat insane eyes. The man chuckled then; a quiet cackle, completely void of humour. His eye ticked as he did, making it look even worse, really. 

“My, how rude of me not to introduce myself, Nakahara Chuuya-san. My name is Shusaku Endo.” 

Okay, Chuuya had to admit. For someone who seemed to know him and his routes and preferences so well, who seemed to have an actual, personal grudge against him, he thought the name would ring a bell. It didn’t. It just made him raise an eyebrow at the guy between worried glances at Akutagawa’s face. His lover’s expression didn’t change, and eyes didn’t lit up again; but somehow, by some intuition, Chuuya could see suffering under the emotionless, doll-like mask. And then it hit him; gods, Akutagawa could see this. He perceived everything that was happening; he just had no control over his body. If the man will manage to force him to cut his throat... 

...Akutagawa will watch himself killing Chuuya. 

Fuck.

“Doesn’t fucking ring a bell. What the hell do you want with me? What the hell do you want with Ryuu, huh? Let him the fuck go, if you wanna be smart and kill me then at least do it one on one instead of like this, you fucking coward.” 

Again, the man smiled the sweet, gentle smile at him, and honestly, Chuuya was feeling sick just looking at it. 

“Of course you’d say that, Nakahara Chuuya-san. You, the top executive of the Mafia, known for your loyalty and your influence over those under you... and, ah, this...” for the first time, something like disgust flew across the man’s face. “...partner... of yours. How... unnatural.” he said, the word partner sounding like something disgusting an older lady picks up with tweezers and throws into the toilet. Still, the man continued, seemingly not aware of the sheer amount of murderous intent oozing out of Chuuya at this moment. 

“Incidentally, I don’t have any particular interest in you... but you see, I am a good person.” the man smiled angelically again. “And as a good person, it is my holy duty to save people... and your organization, ah... kills so many. Corrupts so many more... with... unnatural ideas and such.” He nodded gravely. “I am quite sorry, but I’m afraid you will have to die. With you dead, and this... partner of yours... waking up to see himself having killed you, I come to understand Port Mafia will take a solid hit. Well, no need to prolong this. I would offer you last sacraments, but, ah...” he waved his hand elegantly, before smiling at Chuuya once more, his gaze moving to Akutagawa.

“Let us proceed.” 

#silxntrabiddog #;my beloved [Akutagawa Ryuunosuke] #;in darkness I found you [ChuuAku] #;withered pages [drabble] #;to kill you with a kiss

[titleleaf]

best shit I read in 2016

(aka, Some Shit I Read This Year – ~inspired by~ @forthegothicheroine​‘s list with accompanying musical selections and that of @maddie-grove​ but… overall, just plain less good)

psycho-sexual: male desire in hitchcock, de palma, scorsese, and friedkin - david greven

Some of the only tolerable essays I found in my pre-Yuletide Hitchcock plunge – a really really really fun text if you, like me, tend to faceplant into Films About Dudes.

columbine - dave cullen

Read this if you want to feel fucking awful; it contains at least one pretty nervy assertion that is contentious among Columbine survivors and worth examining no matter what your stance is, but it’s good and hard to quit reading.

leopold and loeb: the crime of the century - hal higdon

Idk how a true crime book released in 1975 by that guy who wrote all your mom’s favorite marathon running books is this decent, but it is.

born to run - bruce springsteen

Sweet sweet memoir action about family, generational patterns of trauma and mental illness, writing, music, and unraveling your many many influences. Also, I’m gay for Bruce Springsteen, I’m sorry. I only got gayer.

angels in america: a gay fantasia on national themes - tony kushner

This one’s a play! No! It’s two plays! It’s fucking funny and bitter and intense and you should go read it.

the long goodbye - raymond chandler

I read a bunch of hardboiled-adjacent stuff this year and watched a lot of weird noir, but this was THE TOPS. It’s weird and fucked up in a very circa-1953 way but I think I need to reread it.

the secret of drearcliff grange school - kim newman

This… is going to be even more of a fucking downer to reread than ever (YA girl’s school adventure novel dealing in part with the rise of fascism in miniature, goody, what the fuck) but I found it remarkably good-hearted and sincere and also JAM-PACKED WITH GIRLS. There is exactly one male character I can even remember existing in this novel and he is of no importance whatsoever.

we were liars - e. lockhart

This one was just fun and it walloped me despite being PURE distilled tropes, and also YA – I guess YA Martha’s Vineyard psychodrama with fucked-up twists beneath its sunbaked surface? But oh dude I dug it, and it had shades of VC Andrews in a way I like.

wolf in white van - john darnielle

I wasn’t really sure what to expect out of this – it’s a different kind of unreliable narrator than in We Were Liars, in that he’s not trying to lie to you or fuck with you, but it's a good twisty serious book about trauma and surviving stuff people assume you cannot possibly have survived and feathering your nest with stuff that means something to you, no matter how lowbrow people might say that stuff is. 

silence - shusaku endo

READ THIS IF YOU WANT TO FEEL BAD and also to get fucked up about faith (and confused about Catholicism)

#ska reads a thing #books