#sheesh i’ve got bois on the brain apparently

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 318: On Your Left

Previously on BnHA: The Hawksquad+Lurkers were all “well this sucks” and sat around a bit talking about how maybe they should actually come up with a new plan that is actually good, but then in the end they were like “nah.” Deku was all, “THERE’S SOMETHING INSIDE ME THAT PULLS BENEATH THE SURFACE!! CONSUMING, CONFUSING!! THIS LACK OF SELF CONTROL I FEAR IS NEVERENDING. IT’S HAUNTING HOW I CANT SEEM TO FIND MYSELF AGAIN. MY WALLS ARE CLOSING IN.” Just, literally that whole entire song. All Might was all “Deku you should take care of yourself, try eating a thing,” and Deku was all “BYE, ALL MIGHT,” and just LEFT. He left!!! What the fuck!!!

Today on BnHA: Endeavor is all, “maybe if Deku didn’t listen to All Might he’ll listen to me instead.” Deku is all, “[doesn’t listen to Endeavor]” because, well, yeah. The Vestiges are all, “surprisingly, even we are a little concerned -- maybe you should get some rest, kid.” Deku is all, “((Ò ‸ Ó)).” The Vestiges are all, “holy shit.” Deku is all, “[wanders the ruined city streets terrifying the populace on account of him looking like Shelob had a baby with one of the Nazgul].” Some shriveled-up puppeteer villain asshole is all, “HORIKOSHI SAID IT’S MY TURN TO ATTACK DEKU TODAY SO I AM GOING TO SUMMON MY FRIGHTENED HELPLESS ATTACK MOB!!” Kacchan is all “WHADDYA MEAN THEY FOUND THE NERD!!! -- oh wait, that’s me, I found him. I found the nerd, you guys.” And just in time, too. I was about to owe a whole lot of people a whole lot of dollars.

so I have been super good about spoilers this week as always, but let me tell you guys, for the past 36 hours my dash filters have basically been nonstop “manga spoilers” this and “bnha 318” that, and so I’m coming in with a fair amount of hype here. your move, Horikoshi

oh, good! they got Endeavor to call Deku to try to talk him out of it. what a great and wonderful plan

“listen up kid, you haven’t slept since March and you are basically a walking biohazard right now, I’m just telling it like it is. didn’t you get shot like three times?? and there was a whole thing about how you urgently needed medical attention?? and supposedly we gave it to you, but I mean you haven’t even changed your clothes and don’t seem to have any fresh bandages or anything, so did we?? did we, really?? and also we all got blown up yesterday, so yeah.” hmm he’s making some reasonable points here you guys, but you sure do go on and on, Endeavor

oh he says foreign aid is finally on its way! I’m sure they’ll be very helpful. I mean in fairness they can hardly be worse than the home-grown heroes at this point

hey Enji, could you maybe try appealing to Deku the sixteen-year-old human boy, as opposed to Deku The World’s Last Hope? he does have value beyond his quirk. I know that’s always been an incredibly difficult concept for you to grasp, but could you maybe TRY, jesus

and also we’re worried about you as a person?? you’re just a kid and you’re pushing yourself way too hard?? you were going to say that part next, right. why the hell didn’t Hawks make this call instead

“don’t worry about me... I’m completely fine” Deku you do understand that saying it over and over again doesn’t actually make it true

and again with the rush!! all the rush rush rush!! we’re running out of time, we can’t let AFO and Tomura keep getting stronger, I have to end this now, there’s no time to rest, etc. etc. etc. just the constant pressure of this whole big countdown on top of everything else

holy shit, you KNOW it’s bad when even the Vestiges are telling him to chill

these guys are basically the walking talking embodiments of self-sacrifice; if even they’re telling him he needs to take five, then he must seriously be like half a step away from death’s door

OH SHIT LMAO

DIDN’T EVEN LET HIM FINISH HIS SENTENCE BEFORE HE SENT HIM INTO THE FUCKING SHADOW REALM WITH THAT FUCKING LOOK. HOLY FUCK. DIDN’T EVEN KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO DIE TWICE. SHIT

(ETA: so I’m pretty sure this was just Danger Sense activating and so he cut them off to go do more hero stuff, but I’m gonna go ahead and stick to my original interpretation anyway lol.)

anyway so how’s everybody doing. we all good? En, you good? Banjou? Shino? I’m imagining you guys all curled up in a little ball on the floor right now lol. can’t say I blame you though, no shame

lmaoooooooooooo

“SHEESH.” sheesh indeed, lmao. “what in the FUCK was that”

see, this is why y’all need Kacchan. you need someone who’s not going to back down from him no matter what. if it’s a matter of out-stubborning Midoriya fucking Izuku, then there’s only one other person on the planet capable of that, and we all know it. don’t pretend like you don’t. I am not going to shut up about this! we’ve had our hurt so now what about SOME COMFORT, DAMMIT

“I’m afraid that he’s becoming influenced by my conscience” nah are you kidding Nana this is all 100% made-in-Japan pure original Deku right here

see, Banjou gets it. “that kid, he’s totally going on his own.” exactly. this was so inevitable it was basically scientific law

“well I for one don’t see the problem with Deku being so obsessed with saving everyone else that he pushes himself until his body and soul literally fall apart” okay, whose speech bubbles are these?? we’re about to have words

lol of course

well you always did prefer the direct route didn’t you. but even you can’t possibly think this is okay lol

dark AU!Kacchan please tell us more about your badass doomed timeline in which everything went to shit and you apparently had the same character arc that Deku is having right now except it somehow made you sexier instead of turning you into a rabid t-rex. I have so many questions

oh so now you want to help??? well -- good, actually. sorry if that sounded offended just now lol

(ETA: so at first when I got to the end of this chapter I was wondering if Katsuki B. had somehow summoned his alternate-universe counterpart through trippy OFA space telepathy lol. but in the original Japanese there’s no reference to “we”, so this appears to be a mistranslation. this line should probably read more like “if there’s something/someone out there that would be able to complement/complete the current Midoriya Izuku [it would be]…” which, oh hello, is that Horikoshi once again reaffirming that Deku and Bakugou complete each other lol. “guess what guys, the Vestiges ship it too" heck yeah. they know what’s up!)

look how admiring his boyfriends are. HORIKOSHI GIVE US THE REST OF THIS BACKSTORY ALREADY GODDAMMIT

“meanwhile somewhere in the depths of the ruined city, Deku was having a dance-off with the villains”

I like how the villains all have this “AHH WHAT THE FUCK” kind of body language to them lol. I mean if it were me, and an eldritch horror suddenly clawed its way from the shadows with its writhing glowy tentacles and pants-shitting nuclear death stare, I would probably just die on the spot. no need to stick around. only pain awaits

lol for a minute I thought this was Can’t Ya See-kun and I was like “WHAT A FASCINATING CROSSING OF PATHS” but it’s just some random girl

he seems genuinely confused lol

Deku it’s because you look like something that crawled out of a sewer drain, sweetheart

lol they just took his word for it?

so trusting. even though they’re immediately hauling ass anyway just to be safe lmao

“my appearance is frightening to others” no shit Deku it’s because you look like a fucking alien exorcism. you look like a Lich that got caught up in an oil spill my dude

NO NOT THE CHOSEN ONE ANGST AGAIN

I RAN OUT OF ESSAY JUICE FOR THIS ALREADY HORIKOSHI!! I’VE BEEN TALKING ABOUT IT FOR MONTHS NOW WHAT TOOK YOU SO LONG!! BUT ANYWAYS, GOOD!! I MEAN, BAD, THOUGH, OBVIOUSLY. BUT YES

“ENJOY THIS MONTAGE OF DEKU BATTLING A RANDOM KAIJU AND WANDERING THE WOODS LIKE A DERANGED GREEN BABA YAGA” okay yes but sir, exactly how much longer is this going to go on. if it’s a matter of you wanting to make sure we get it, let me assure you that aside from a few stray chuunis who think that Deku embracing the Darkness is the coolest thing he’s ever done, all of us here in fandom fully comprehend that this is Not Good

-- OH SO IT’S LIKE THAT

really. with the flashbacks to his loved ones’ smiling faces and everything. not even gonna try to aim above the belt, huh

AND NO KACCHAN??! NO CLASSMATES?!?! IS HE PURPOSELY NOT THINKING OF THEM??? OR ARE THEY BEING SAVED FOR THE NEXT PAGE??? SO HELP ME, IF THE NEXT PART OF THIS SENTENCE IS “CAN PROTECT THEM”, OR EVEN WORSE, “CAN SEE THEIR SMILING FACES AGAIN”, I...

WHAT DID I JUST SAY

(ETA: my man did Sero and Kaminari fucking dirty lmao. I miss their smiling faces too omg.)

the sheer, unparalleled irony of him saying this while he stands there looking like the gargoyle demon from Fantasia got crossed with an umbrella that got struck by lightning. Deku :(

oi who the fuck is this clown

is he controlling this mob with his evil hair. “what if I made an exhausted, running-on-fumes Deku battle a brainwashed mob at Ground Zero.” Horikoshi do you just have like a checklist of horrible things you want to do to your protagonist

easy there Sasori

well joke’s on you buddy because he’s apparently “completely fine”, so

“here’s to hoping that you know more about AFO’s location than the others” jesus christ Deku you really have hung your mercy out to dry huh

now he’s forcing his mob of terrified prisoners to attack Deku ahhhh. sucks to be them. at least they’re not being controlled by bees

so Deku is saying that Sasori’s control can be broken with “physical trauma.” similar to Shinsou’s quirk I guess. but so does that mean he’s gonna have to hurt them? ( •﹏•)

NO NOT MORE SAD EYES

“DEATH BY EMPATHY!!!” HORIKOSHI NO

fuck. he looks like he’s on the verge of passing out

this is what happens when you nerf a character’s self-preservation stats in favor of spamming their bone-breaking stats instead. NOW ACCEPTING BRAIN CELL DONATIONS FOR A BOY IN NEED!! with your loving generosity we can hopefully help him live to the ripe old age of seventeen

OMGFGGG

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

[grabs your hands] ლ(*꒪ヮ꒪*)ლ [swings you in a circle] へ(ﾟ◇ﾟへ)

THASSSSSSSS WHATSSSSSSS UPPPPPPPPPP

HORIKOSHI REALLY SAID FUCK THAT MASK (ノ°ο°)ノ YOU FINALLY LEARNED!! IT’S CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT!!!!

JUST FOR YOU KACCHAN, HORIKOSHI LEFT THIS ONE BAD GUY WHO’S STILL WEAK TO FIRE. GOD BLESS

IT’S YOUR COUNTERPART, KATSUKI B!!!! HOW WE DOIN OVER THERE IN THE TRIPPY COSMIC OFA SPACE REALM LOL. DO WE BELIEVE YET, FANDOM???

LIGHTS!!!!

INSTANT RESULTS!!! IT’S SUPER EFFECTIVE!!!

(ETA: imagine what this must look like to Deku though. he’s been caught up in this dark cloud of despair and exhaustion that’s been building up over... I’m gonna go ahead and say “weeks”, because yeah. and now he finds himself here, in the place where All Might’s legacy ended and the torch was passed to him. and the world is in ruins, and he’s surrounded by frightened people who are all trying to hurt him -- because who isn’t trying to hurt him, these days -- and he’s scrambling to figure this all out, but meanwhile the weariness is finally starting to catch up to him, and so he’s basically just standing there in a fog of complete and utter misery.

and then all of a sudden through that haze, he hears the one voice that’s more familiar than any other that he knows. like, I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if he thought he was just imagining it at first. Kacchan showing up to save him right when he’s at his most desperate and feeling the most alone. Kacchan, showing up to save him.

this is the person he always looked up to as a child (to be fair he was quite a strange child lmao). the person who was even closer to him than All Might. the person he always thought was amazing. and bam, here he is now. appearing in the sky out of nowhere to one-shot the bad guy with a single blast (which, btw, that was his armor-piercing attack too lmao dslkjlk take it easy there kiddo). like, that must have felt absolutely surreal to him, especially coming at a time when he’s already half-delirious and barely hanging on to reality. he must have really thought that he was losing it there for a second.

but he’s really there. it really is him. and for this brief moment -- before the rest of the situation catches up to him, and he remembers about all of the fucked-up AFO stuff, and remembers why he was so afraid and why he was pushing everyone away -- for just this one brief moment, he’s too exhausted and stunned to do anything except to just react. just stands there, looking up at him in awe.

and you know, it almost reminds me of...

just. you guys. the character development. the freaking character development. someone who brings reassurance. someone who shows up and makes you think, “oh, it’s all going to be okay now, because [person] is here.” the role reversals. the growth. the payoff!! because who is the one person who always had faith that Kacchan would one day grow up to become an amazing hero like that. WHO IS IT. YOU ALREADY KNOW.

omg. anyways, bless you Horikoshi, my feels which have been on backorder since fucking September have finally arrived lmao. yes, good, thank you. worth the wait. it is always, always worth the wait. fuck yeah.)

“LOWFRIES” SO YOU’RE TELLING ME THE WHOLE GANG IS HERE, AHHHHHHHH (º̩̩́⌣º̩̩̀ )

BEAUTIFUL. WONDERFUL. SENSATIONAL. I DON’T EVEN CARE THAT JUMP IS ON BREAK NEXT WEEK. THIS RIGHT HERE WILL SUSTAIN ME

#bnha 318 #midoriya izuku #BAKUGOU KATSUKI #!!!! #twowy mctwoface #bnha #boku no hero academia #bnha meta #bakudeku #bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #bnha manga spoilers #makeste reads bnha

[harlowsage]

Strange (CH)

{Part 2}

Pair: Calum Hood & Jude Armenta (fictional character)

Summary: this chapter is based on the song “Holding out for you” by Pond. A year has passed since the pair have broken up. Calum runs into Jude and they catch up on life.

Warning: mention of anxiety and therapy.

Character Preface: Jude Armenia is a Grammy award winning producer (sound engineer, mixer, songwriter, composer). She’s very well known and respected among musicians.

https://harlowsage.tumblr.com/post/660386524153675776/strange-ch

{Above is the link to Part 1👆🏼}

https://harlowsage.tumblr.com/post/660922684542238720/strange-ch-chapter-3

{Link to Part 3 of strange👆🏼}

{This is part 2 of Strange👇🏼}

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The sight of her made him freeze, causing him to stop in the middle of the road. The walking signal turned off and it was time for the oncoming traffic to proceed, the sound of cars honking woke him out of his still state catching the attention of Jude who was now looking up from her journal.

“Huh?”, her head tilted to the side as she watched him jog over to the sidewalk on her side of the road.

“Calum? Cal!”, she jumped up from her seat and waved him over with delight.

Whether they haven’t spoken in a year or the fact that he’s her ex, none of it mattered since at the end of the day she loved him.

Calum walked up to her, his hand scratching the back of his neck as a lopsided boyish grin plagued his sun kissed face.

“I almost didn’t recognize you, sheesh you’ve gotten buff. What are you lifting, like 250?” She laughed while reaching her arms out to him, pulling him into a warm hug.

Calum instinctively wrapped his arms around her shoulders hugging her back, as if 365 days haven’t passed with zero contact.

“295 actually”, he chuckled as they pulled apart.

“Jesus Christ, you cave man. The buff look suits you”, she grinned while gesturing him to join her and take a seat, which he did without a second thought.

“Your hair, it looks really nice on you”, he complimented her, making sure to not step over any boundaries.

“That’s good considering I didn’t have a choice but to chop it, I visited my brother a few months back and just my luck my niece and nephew had gotten lice from school”, she laughed with a slight groan, her nose scrunched in that cute way calum loved.

“Ah shit, not the little groms giving miss entomophobia the crawlees”, he chuckled, leaning back into his seat feeling more relaxed than nervous.

“It was a brutal week. Nonetheless it was nice having Layla be all motherly, washing my hair and picking the nasties off me”, she smiled at the fond memory.

Since Judes mother passed when she was a little girl, she never really got to experience what it’s like to have that motherly touch.

“As long as you had a good time, I know how little you get to visit them”, he hummed acknowledged her busy schedule.

“Much to your surprise, I’ve been setting aside work so I can become one with reality. Just like how you always used to tell me” she smiled coyly, her hands fidgeting with the pages of her journal.

“Seriously? What made you finally take a step back?” He asked, now sitting up straight, intrigued by this new Jude.

“You, actually. A few months after we broke up, my health was seriously declining. I never noticed that the only reason I was staying up and running was because you would remind me to take care of myself. With you absent in my life, my body couldn’t keep up with my brain. The amount of times I’ve had to get a liquid IV stuck into my arm began to become tedious”, Jude explained not meeting Calums eyes.

Admitting this information to him, embarrassed her. She never wanted Calum to know how bad things had gotten for her, but she’s never been able to not tell Calum everything. Talking to him came so naturally to her.

“Fucking hell, Jude I hate to hear that was happening to you. You’re ok now, right? You’re taking care of yourself?” He asked, now noticing just how thin she’s gotten.

“Of course! I have a nutritionist and I’m seeing a therapist twice every two weeks. Apparently I have anxiety, which explains a hell of a lot. The reason I worked so hard before was because, whenever I wasn’t working, my brain would be running a mile a minute”, she sighed, exasperated at the memories of her feeling off and not knowing why.

“That does explain a lot. I thought I caused it, then again I never knew the Jude before I entered her life” he hummed, taking in the new information she just gave him.

“You thought you caused my problem with overworking myself?” She asked, voice laced with shock.

“Well of course Jude, you stoped talking to me and I hardly got any time with you anymore. You were always taking on new projects when it came time for us to spend time together. I thought I had pushed you away”, Calum explained, his hands moving in big gestures showing her just how freaked out he was about the whole situation.

“Cal, no, you never pushed me away. I hate that you blamed yourself. It’s just really chaotic up in the noggin. But not anymore, I’m doing great. You’ll be happy to know I’m on a very long break from work. Made my manager turn down a fuck ton of projects so I can have a breather”, Jude laughed, excited at the thought of what she’ll be filling up her time doing on her hiatus.

“It’s like I’m talking to a whole new person. You’ve never turned down projects, even when you were working on 3 other ones”, he shook his head, eyes slightly wide, with a happy smile planted on his plump lips.

“Enough about me, what have you been up to!?” She asked leaning towards with her chin propped on her fist, giving him her full undivided attention.

“Well, the boys and I finished recording our next album. Now we’re just laying on some finishing touches before we send it in. On my free time, I’ve been taking Duke on morning hikes and learning how to surf. Aside from that, nothing much. Just living that slow paced life”, he chuckled at the current sight of her, staring up at him with her big doe eyes and wide toothy smile.

“Sounds like you’re living the life”, Jude hummed.

“More or less”, he shrugged.

“Say, you wanna grab dinner with me tonight? I discovered this super low key and authentic Italian restaurant near Cattle,” she asked him, her left hand in her lap secretly crossing her fingers.

“Why the hell not, I’ll break my carb diet for you”, he smiled as a soft laugh escaped his lips.

“I missed this”, she sighed happily.

“Me too”, Calum shyly smiled, hoping she’s feeling the same thing that he is.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Lemme know what you think :) feed back is appreciated. Where would you like to see these two go?

#calum hood fic #calum hood smut #calum hood blurbs #calum hood fluff #calum hood fanfic #calum hood imagine #calum 5sos #calum 5sauce #calum fic #calum hood #5 seconds of smut #5sos imagine #5sos smut #5sos blurbs #5sosedit #5sos

[itsscrystal]

One shot: Three is the magic number.

Osamu x fem!reader

a/n: idk if this makes sense but suddenly this came out?? hopefully it doesn’t seem as bad

warnings: cursing, angst, mentions of someone dying, but it’s a happy ending at the end so...

summary: is Osamu a lucky man? while he couldn’t end up with [l/n] [y/n] for the first two lives, maybe things would be better for his third life. afterall, three is the magic number, right?

ONE

Osamu never knew he could be so lucky.

To be able to marry the love of his life, [l/n] [y/n]. Their families have always been close. One day, their parents have decided that uniting the two prestigious families, Miya and [l/n], would be a good idea. Hence the arranged marriage between their two youngest children— Miya Osamu and [l/n] [y/n].

This wedding felt like a dream. He was so happy that he could finally stop hiding his blush whenever he saw her. To be able to stand next to her, not as her friend, but as her husband.

When he took a sip of sake with [y/n], love in his eyes, he was already looking forward to spending the rest of his life with her. He knew, this moment where they both made eye contact shyly over the rim of the cup, will be etched in his mind forever.

One moment. He didn’t know what happened. He only knew he blinked his eyes, at the same time admiring [y/n]’s flutter of eyelashes, when the bright orange flames licked her and everywhere.

“F-Fire! Put it out!” His twin’s panicked voice reached him. His hands let go of the wooden cup as he raced to save his beloved.

Orange. It was all he could see. Where is everyone? Why can’t he see anyone? Where is his wife?

He could only feel intense heat burning around him as he reached out in the direction of his love. Relief flowed in his veins as he felt one hand clutching his.

“[y/n]-sama? Is that you?” Osamu cried. Moving closer, he realised it was not her, but his twin. “We gotta go! `Samu, hurry!” Atsumu tugged on his hand. “B-But [y/n]-sama?” “Save yer life first! We can talk about her later!” Choking on the smoke burning on the wood of the shrine, he was dragged through the flames unwillingly, his hoarse voice calling for her.

It was only later when he was away from the site he looked hard for [y/n]. No, no, where is she! Fear fuelling his heavy legs, he ran back towards the flaming shrine, only to see a glimpse of [y/n] in it.

She didn’t make it.

“NO!” Osamu screamed and was about to take another step when he felt his twin pulling him back. “Yer not going back! I will not let ya die!”

I love you.

That was all Osamu could see on her face as she slowly disappeared from sight.

No, no…

“They’ve tried. They told us that there’s no way they can go back and save [y/n]-sama too. The fire was too big then. `Samu, I-I’m sorry for yer lost…”

Osamu never knew he could be so unlucky.

TWO

Osamu never knew he could be so lucky.

What are the odds that his best friend, [l/n] [y/n] would kiss her? None. Unless she’s in love with him too.

Osamu tried to quieten the pounding of his heart as he looked at the now-knocked-out girl. Earlier during the evening, as both their parents are out for a business trip, his brother, Atsumu, has decided to invite their friend over for dinner. As well as to raid the expensive cabinet of liquor at home.

Looking at his twin lying on the couch, dead to the world, he decided to just leave him there and carried [y/n] into his bedroom. Technically, he shares his bedroom with `Tsumu, but now it’s just HIS room.

I want to sleep on my bed too… I’ll just put her on `Tsumu’s bed. For a while.

Next morning, he woke up to two people talking. With his eyes shut, he decided to eavesdrop a little.

“[y/n]! So you’re here after all!”

“`Tsumu? Oh my god I actually slept on your bed I’msorryI’msorry—”

“Why are yer sorry? I like it.”

“Huh?”

“I mean it. I like seeing ya on my bed. I’ve been wanting to tell ya this for a while. I think I like you, [y/n].”

“Damn, luckily I’m not the only one. Dummy, I love ya too.”

What’s going on..?

“I thought you liked `Samu…?”

“What? I know both of ya look the same, but I like you. Not `Samu. Well… Unless you don’t like me…”

“No! I like yer too! A lot!”

Osamu was glad he chose to face the wall instead of `Tsumu’s bed. Because he could not stop tears from leaking out of his eyes.

Osamu never knew he could be so unlucky.

THREE

Osamu wasn’t sure if he was lucky or not.

Having a twin that has an identical face as him, seemed to bring more trouble than he wants.

Firstly, it did not help that his twin, Atsumu, was known for his bad boy reputation in school. This made teachers mistake him as his brother. Hence, he was often scolded and targetted by many of them.

<Well, while Atsumu was the residential bad boy, Osamu was the shyer, quieter twin that has way better grades and conduct. Pity people can’t seem to differentiate both of them, despite the very obvious difference in hair colour. He thought that if he could convince `Tsumu to bleach his hair piss-yellow, things might change. Apparently not.>

Secondly, of course his brother’s girls kept finding him. He’s tired of telling people repeatedly that No, I didn’t sleep with you last night. No, I’m not Miya Atsumu, but his twin Miya Osamu. No, I’m not interested in that. Yes, I like staying normal. If only people can just leave him alone! Or maybe stop identifying him as his brother.

While he loves his brother a lot, this is starting to become annoying and bothersome.

So his response to the girl was “No, I’m not Miya Atsumu. Please go away.” when she came to him and proclaimed her love for him. “I know?” She replied in confusion, head tilted to one side.

“Yep. You must’ve gotten the wrong Miya twin. That’s right. Good bye.” Placing his books neatly into his bag, he quickly grabbed it and left the library. Sheesh, can’t he get a little break from all the annoying girls? He just wants to study and get a nice grade for the test tomorrow!

“I mean, I know. That you’re Miya Osamu, not Miya Atsumu. Both of you have different hair colours. I have eyes that are working fine, okay?”

Osamu was surprised. Okay, someone finally identifying the right guy. “Uh, so what did you say earlier?”

She huffed in annoyance. “That my name is [l/n] [y/n] and I LIKE YOU. I HAVE A CRUSH ON YOU.” Osamu wasn’t sure how to reply to her confession. Not like he had much experience with this kind of thing. “Uh… Okay? What do I say next?”

“...”

Osamu nervously pushed up his glasses that are beginning to slip down his nose. “I-I mean...”

“Let’s be friends?” [y/n] finally spoke. Osamu couldn’t help but shiver a little. When did her voice sound so good? “O-Okay.” Osamu nodded and then exchanged numbers with her. Maybe she'll be my study partner. It’s kind of lonely to study alone.

•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•

“And that’s it.” Osamu said. “What? Are ya serious? Lame!” His twin, Atsumu cried. “Ya need to bring her to a date. Ya can’t meet up just to study!”

“But all I do is study…” Osamu muttered. “What am I supposed to do…?”

“Easy! The movies!” “`Tsumu the last time I went to watch a movie I slept through it as I finished the popcorn.”

Atsumu was stuck. He wasn’t sure what to tell his brother. What he usually does can’t really be applied to Osamu. “Do ya like her though? Are there any feelings? Any spark?” “Are ya stupid? This ain’t some fairytale.” “Don’t ignore my question! Hey why are you hitting me with your pillow? Wait yer blushing—”

•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•

Osamu had decided to meet up with [y/n] again. This time, he decided to listen to his twin’s suggestion. Watch a movie. Yes. A movie.

Breathe in, breathe out. You will not sleep during the movie. Eat your popcorn slowly. Or drink water. Yes. You’ve brought two litres of water for this.

“I’m here!”

Osamu unconsciously smiled as he looked at his phone. Wait, why is he smiling at your text?

Looking around, he spotted [y/n] and took a moment to admire her. In a pink sweater and jeans, she’d never looked so good to him. Is it her fashion? Maybe that’s why she looks so good now.

He was about to wave and call her name when he saw a flash of piss-yellow colour. His brother, the more popular twin, Atsumu walked towards her and slung an arm around her shoulders. “What’s a pretty girl like ya doing here without a date? Your name’s [y/n], right?”

<how does he know her? scratch that— for his pea-sized brain, how does he remember almost every girl’s name?>

Osamu wanted to turn around and walk back to the campus. Maybe he should just text her and tell her he’s not feeling well…

“Sorry, Atsumu-san, can you remove your arm? I feel quite uncomfortable like that.” [y/n] boldly pushed his arm away before continuing, “well, I’m meeting Osamu-san. Do you know where is he? He hasn't replied to my text yet.”

“Are ya serious? He actually agreed to this? He hates—” “Hiya [y/n]-san.” Osamu decided to intervene before Atsumu could continue. “`Samu! It’s her? Oh my gosh FINALLY.” “Huh?” Both Osamu and [y/n] stared at Atsumu in confusion. “Nothing!”

“Oh! [y/n]-san do you want to go on a date with me? `Cause I’ve never seen anyone so pretty~” Atsumu suddenly asked. Osamu had never wanted to hit Atsumu so much. That jerk even winked at her cheekily and had flipped on what Osamu mentally called the flirting switch.

“Uh Atsumu-san…”

Osamu was panicking inside. Maybe [y/n] had given up on him and not liked him anymore. No! He was planning to—

“No thanks but she’s with me because I like her too just like how she likes me so now scram before I punch you you knew she’s the one I liked how can you `Tsumu I’m even willing to watch a movie like a movie and not study—”

“Woah! Woah. I didn’t know ya could speak so much `Samu! I was just joking ya know…”

“So you like me too?” [y/n] tugged on his sleeve and asked. “I-I…” Osamu couldn’t stop the flush on his face. Oh my god why did I choose this time to confess this is not what I’ve planned…

“Well, I’ve got to say, unlike you, I do not like her that way. So hurry up and say yes you idiot!” Atsumu whined and stomped his feet impatiently. “Yeah… I like you too [y/n].” Osamu replied and then tugged her into his arms. “So, uh, what movie are we— I mean just ME and [Y/N]— watching again?”

“Okay, I got the hint. I’m leaving y’all now! Have a good date~” Atsumu rolled his eyes and then screeched “`Samu REMEMBER TO KISS HER AFTERWARDS OKAY”

“SHUT UP YOU PISS HEAD” Osamu shouted.

Well, one is sure: at the end of the movie, Osamu had a girlfriend— [y/n].

Hmm… Well, Osamu can consider himself a lucky man, I guess.

THE END

“Aww… At least the guy got to be with the girl! Like in his third life,” Komori Motoya sighed and then gasped. “Wait! Miya-san! Look! He looks a bit like you!”

“HUH?” Miya Atsumu, one of the setters invited to the All-Japan Youth Camp, screeched. “From what you’ve just said, are you cursing me?”

“No! I’m just stating a comment. The image the author attached at the end of the story features the guy and girl in the story. Apparently she drew this up and said that she imagined them looking like that.”

“Hmm… It looks a little like Miya-san but not really. The hair colour isn’t piss-coloured…” Kageyama muttered.

Unfortunately, Atsumu heard that. “Oi! Tobio-kun, you’ll hurt my feelings like that! My hair colour is the definition of cool and beautiful. It’s not that bad!” Coming closer to peer over Komori’s shoulder, he squinted at the phone screen. “You’re right… He does look like me… But since it’s such a sad story, I’m going to say it’s `Samu! Not me!”

“Who?” Komori asked.

“`Samu. The obviously not-so-cool twin. Here’s a picture.”

“You sure he’s not as cool? To be honest, his hair colour is nicer than yours…” Kageyama frowned.

“Tobio-kun! Not you too!”

“See? That’s why I rather talk to the other Miya and not you, Miya.” Sakusa Kiyoomi’s voice could be heard as clear as day, even though he was standing ten metres away from everyone.

“Hey! Not you too Omi-kun!”

“And I’ve said not to call me that, Miya.”

a/n: in case y’all are still confused: the story about Osamu is actually a story Komori read online. thank you for reading this !! likes and reblogs are appreciated :)

#haikyuu #hq #haikyuu x y/n #haikyuu x reader #miya osamu x reader #miya osamu x y/n #miya osamu #miya atsumu #miya twins #komori motoya #sakusa kiyoomi #kageyama tobio #oneshot #fluff #angst #itsscrystal

[yamithediaperdork]

Crime and punishment (MHA)

Crime and Punishment

Out of all the duties that Katsuki thought was a waste of time for hero's in training and legends of awesomeness like himself, Touring experimental new prisons had to be up there near the top. Normally he'd be able to bully someone else in the class into taking the job off his hands but today no such luck as the teachers had taken notice and were watching him like a god damn hawk. Adding to his bucket of annoyance was who he was partnered up with for this little tour, Izuku Midoriya himself..or as Katsuki preferred to call the green haired cry baby: Deku. (though it did spoil some of his fun his cruel nickname for the weakling had been taken by the crybaby as his hero name. still...) Adding to the total bullshit that this assignment was, not only were they suppose to take notes and report back with their suggestions so the full trained heroes could make a judgment call (which rendered the whole fucking thing moot if you asked Katsuki his humble opinion) But they had to do it in costume. Being of the mindset he put on his uniform to fight and blow things up, not do paperwork, this just served to piss the already poorly tempered hero in training off even more. they were currently in the office of the warden for this new experiential jail and he'd gone off into his own little world while the balding man with the big nose rambled on and on. He knew Deku would be a good little suck up and soak in every word and he'd just copy the nerd's report when this was all done anyways. He only tuned back in when Deku nudged him with his elbow and Katsuki realized they had been talking to him and he'd just been staring off into space. "what?" He asked. "..As I was telling your collage here, we need you to both sign some waivers given the technology that will be on display here, as well as a wavier not to tell anyone other then the hero's your reporting too about what you saw here today." the warden said, frowning. "Yeah yeah, whatever. just give me the stupid paper work and lets get this over with." Katsuki said. "Ah, Great Explosion Murder God Dynamite...I think you should read the paper work and make sure you know what your signing first. Since you kinda..zoned out there." Deku said. "whatever nerd." Katsuki said, though GOD he loved his hero name and leaned in as if he was going to humor the nerd..then just signed the paper work. The warden rolled his eyes but took out two badges that the heroes could wear around their necks and handed them over. "..what, you think SOMEHOW your guards are gonna mistake us for some of your inmates?" Katsuki asked and Deku face palmed. "I really wish you'd just pay attention.." the crybaby whined softly. "what?!" Katsuki huffed. "Maybe if you didn't have the attention span of a toddler Mr..and I can't believe I'm even going to say this.. 'Great Explosion Murder God Dynamite', You'd of heard how much of our system is automated and that badge will keep you from being seen as a prisoner by the computers." the Warden said dryly. "..Who you calling a tod-" Katsuki started, but Deku stepped in and broke it up.

Huffing and pouty, Katsuki trailed behind the warden and Deku as they talked on and on and pictured how easy it would be to just toss a little blast at their feet, for a jump scare. 'heh, better now. Deku will just wet himself and bawl like a baby, again. They should just get a pacifier for him to suck on like the big baby he is.' Katsuki mused, mentally picturing Deku in just a oversized diaper and in a playpen, oversized paci in his mouth and bawling. So vivid was the mental image for a second Katsuki thought he must of been imposing it as he looked into one of the cells. Because there on the floor, hugging a teddy bear was a bald tanned skinned man, maybe in his 30, and he was dressed like a fucking toddler. like, as in paw patrol socks on, and he was wearing a freaking diaper shirt with a dino print on it and uh, yeah.. Mother fucking diapers that showed due to their thickness! the guy didn't even seem to notice him, he was busy sucking on a paci and watching a tv in the room. "what the fuckkkkk?" Katsuki laughed out loud. "..and I see the toddler is back with us." the warden said. "I'ma let that slide because what the fuck? why's that guy in huggies?" Katsuki asked, jerks a thumb at the window and snickering. "We uh..we went over this in the office Great Explosion Murder Death God..This prison is utilizing a new form of regressive therapy.." Deku said, rubbing the back of his head. "Man, the fuck did this guy do to end up being put back in pampers?" Katsuki asked. "must of been a real terror in actual prison for them to make him partake in this!" "-sigh- for the benefit of toddlers who don't listen.." The warden said, coming over and taping a few button on the control panel by the prisoners door, and the wall became transparent for them to get a better view. "Call me a toddler one more time, I fucking dare you." Katsuki grumbled. "ANYWAYS! Every one of the inmates in this prison is a volunteer who is getting 10 years shaved off of their sentences to try this. If the program is approved and if they wish to keep being part of it, further time will be shaved off." The warden said. "Each cell  is equipped to look after and care for the inmates as if they were little boys or girls since it's a unisex prison, or if they just happen to be transgender. it's not OUR place to judge them." As the warden spoke, the prisoner who apparently didn't know he was being watched, suddenly got up on his knees and hugged a stuffie close to his chest as he started to make scrunchie faces. "..Is he.." Deku asked, turning and looking away to give the guy privacy. "Oh yeah, he's totally baking brownies." Katsuki snorted. As Katsuki and the warden watched, the back of the inmates diaper shirt and well, of course, diapers puffed out and expanded, to the point the crotch snaps burst open. "Sheesh, fucker must of been holding it in for ages." Katsuki observed. "actually it's part of the diet their on, we feel frequent and massive movements help with breaking down their ego's and let's them accelerate the reforming processes." The warden said proudly. "Righttt..ok fess up. you just like making tough guys shit they're brains out right?" Katsuki asked and chuckled. "..Your a very unpleasant person. I'm going to make a request you NOT be sent for the follow up review." "Oh nooo, I don't have to come here and listen to you drone on and on and watch adults crap themselves. I'm soooo heart broken about that." Katsuki said and rolled his eyes. walking away from the scene and leaving Deku trying to look over and make sure it was ok, Katsuki fiddled with his badge as he walked away from them and missed the sight of the metal arms coming out of the walls and attending to the stinky inmate, though Deku did take a interest in this part can came over to watch. "He doesn't um..seem that upset." Deku said. "oh this isn't his first dirty diaper, and there are speakers in there with a calming female voice praising him for making such a big present and telling him what a good boy he is. again, it could of been a male or female voice, we go with what works best for the inmate." Indeed, one of the metal arms with white gloved hands was coming down now and gently patted the inmates squishy bottom as his head, making the man blush but give a big toothy smile. "you wouldn't know it to look at him now, but he was a several bank robber and known for his brutal tactics. I figure with this treatment he'll be reformed in maybe 4 years..5 tops." The warden said with pride in his voice. "wow..I thought he looked familiar..Hey Ka- Great Explosion Murder God Dynamite, you gotta come and see-" Deku turned to call Katsuki over and the machines started to lift the inmate to a changing table, but the Blond was gone. "What a shock. the toddler wandered off." The warden said, and punched in a command on the control panel again, making the wall go back to normal. "we'd better go and find him.." Deku nodded and they headed up the hall towards where the the hall split into two paths, and it was there Deku looked down and found Katsuki's ID badge. "uhhh warden? what are the chances he'll be snagged without this on?" Deku asked, holding it up. "Between his attuide and wandering off into areas without at least someone else wearing a badge? 93 percent." The warden said, clearly amused. "...Weeeee better hurry...if they try and diaper him he's libel to blown this whole place up. "

Katsuki had at some point stopped playing with his badge and was just busy looking in at the different inmates, trying to see if he knew any of them from news reports and the like on tv. He made a point of knocking on the windows and getting the big babies attention and smirked as they would blush and hide (well some of them, others would just give a sheepish wave and others outright ignored him) Sadly there didn't seem to be any super villains locked up, though then again what villain would of volunteered for something like this? He was making his way to the next cell when suddenly a green light scanned over him, hurting his eyes for a second. "Ow! the fuck!?" he growled, rubbing at them. "Warning: inmate in hallway and not in proper attire. deploying prisoner recapture protocols." A robotic voice called out in the hallway, then was replaced with a sugary sweet male who started to scold him. "Now now, what are you doing out of your cell, and without your cute widdle outfit on little man? you don't wanna make a mess everywhere do you?" as it spoke, multiple holes in the walls opened up and more of the metal arms with the white gloved hands came out of them. "Uh..Hold up, I'm a superhero visiting. I've got a badge and-" Katsuki said, gulping a little and taking a step back, reaching for the badge and finding it gone. "...Well shit on a stick. guess we're doing this the hard way." Having only expected to be doing a little walk around, he hadn't stored any of his explosive sweat for use, though with a fair idea of what these things wanted to do with him, he was flop sweating enough to make up for it. "Such foul language! somebodies in for a mouth washing if he doesn't start behaving! you're already getting a spanking and corner time mister." the Voice announced. "Counter offer: fuck you." Katsuki said and went to work, blowing up two of the arms right off the bat and chagrining in, there was NO way he was gonna lose to a bunch of shitty robot arms! Or that was the going theory till as he got close one of the hands opened up and sprayed a green mist in his face. coughing and then seeing double, Katsuki pouted and got out a final statement before collapsing to the floor. "Knock out gas? No fairrrr!"

He woke up shortly after, and found himself in one of the nursery cells and almost totally naked.  the almost part came from the thick mitten that had been put on both of his hands rendering his powers useless and the booties on his feet. "Nggggh.. damn cheating bas-" "Foul language detected! Bad boy! somebodies getting a mouth washing!" came the male voice over the intercom and before Katsuki could even try and fight back he found himself forced to sit up on the changing change and his arms pinned at his sides by two of the arms.A third one came out of the wall wielding a wet and sudsy bar of soap and Katsuki glared. "Go fuck yourself if you thin-" he started to rant, not quite figuring out that he should of kept his mouth shut and as such the bar was forced into his mouth and he couldn't spit it out, eyes shutting tight and soapy drool trails leaking down his chin. "Maybe five minutes as a soap sucker will help you stop swearing Little guy..but daddy isn't going to hold his breath." the voice said. 'oh good, not only is it a crazy fucking AI that wants to make me a diaper baby..but one with a sense of humor.' Katsuki thought dryly.

Five minutes later and the bar was carefully removed but held close, clearly the machine was waiting to see if he'd learned his lesson. Katsuki for his part was PISSED and wiped at his touage with his mitten hands, trying to get rid of the icky taste. 'Ok Katsuki..you've seen what being a brat got you..let's tone down the attuide and try logic...' He thought, eyeing the walls warily. He hadn't been diapered YET but it was clear that was where he was heading if he didn't figure something out. "uh..What do I call you?" Katsuki said. "Daddy of course little man,m or would you prefer a mommy?" the voice said cheerfully. 'I'd prefer someone dumped a bucket of water on your CPU' Katsuki thought but with GREAT effort kept the comment to himself. "C-Can we talk logically for a second and hold off the diapers? ..Please?" Katsuki said, giving a smile to show he was trying to be good but said smile would of terrified young kids. "..heh I'll hear you out." "Ok so..Were you programed to accept any new inmates at all today? do you have a profile on me that tells you what crimes I supposedly did?" "Scanning..Nope." Daddy said. "Alright..then if I'm not in the system, then I must be telling the truth when I tell you I'm not a inmate right?" Katsuki said and smiled for real. "Hmmm.. well the programmers have been known to be lax when it comes to updates..and you've already earned a 2 month prison term regardless." Daddy said. "What!? what for!?!" Katsuki demanded. the tv clicked to life and footage of Katsuki destroying two of the arms was played. "Destruction of government property." "..ARE YOU SHITTING ME!? YOU STARTED THAT FIGHT!" "Hmmm mouth washing didn't work, let's try anther something else..." Daddy said and the arms moved in again and restrained Katsuki on his tummy and to his horror, a large enema bag was brought out and a rather large looking nozzle. "I bet your just so grumpy because your backed up little guy!" daddy said. "..I really..really..Hate these kind of missions..." Katsuki whimpered.

Deku and the warden did finally find Katsuki, but it was only after finding the scene of the fight, and the warden warning Deku that the machine was programed to automatically add a months sentence for every damaging attack on it. "I mean, I'm sure if we get the head programmer in here we can clear that up..but the machines AI automatically files the charges with the DA so we'll have to talk to them too." the warden explained. With that knowledge in mind Deku thought he'd been prepared to see Katsuki, having known by that point he'd likely been er well..dressed as a inmate. Getting to the cell the warden believed he was in, he punched in the code to make the wall transparent and well..they were greeted by the site of a enema nozzle JUST coming out of Katsuki's backside, and he was being rapidly taped up in a massive white diaper. the blond brat's tummy was bloated and Deku almost could swear he could hear it sloshing and a Pacifier gag had been strapped to his mouth. "He must of been using excessive swearing for it to paci gag him." the warden said, sounding amused. "Yeahhh I can see that.. Uh..Anyway you can try and get this to stop? Like.maybe it won't release him but is there a training potty or something at least?" Deku asked, rubbing the back of his head. truthfully while he wanted to bust a gut laughing he knew that wouldn't be fair to Katsuki, even if the brat had brought this on himself. "Nope. once one of the super poopers goes on, it doesn't come off till filled to the brim." The warden chuckled. "..Super poopers?" "the name of that massive diaper the toddler is wearing." "..you know your enjoying this a little too much." "Oh come on, and your not, even a little bit?" Before Deku could answer he's eyes were drawn to Katsuki as the blond hunched over and loudly whined though his gag, the warden had taken the extra step of making it so they could hear everything too. "Anddd I don't think he's gonna last long enough for a training potty to get in there anyways." taping on the control panel, Katsuki went from staring down at the floor, sweat dripping at his face to looking at them and his cheeks flushed red. he held up one mitten covered hand and waved it, trying to get them to look away but daddy spoke up. "oh look little guy! you have visitors! Hello warden, How are you today?" Daddy asked.

Katsuki whined and started to cry. between the cramps and the utter humiliation of being seen like this he lost any sense of bravo and turned away from the pair watching him, trying to find somewhere to hide before he well, disgraced himself. "I'm fine Daddy. You've made a mistake though daddy, This isn't a inmate of the prison." Katsuki whimpered, massive diaper butt wiggling as he tried to crawl under the crib in the nursery and hearing Deku snort and start to laugh before coughing. "Oh, I guess the little guy was right. It doesn't matter though, per regulation 3467 he's been sentenced to two months of baby rehabilitation warden. the DA has already approved and made it final." Daddy said. "Of course you can start a appeal but that will take 3-5 business days and my little guy here is about to make presents." "wait, how can it get approved if they don't even know who he is?" Deku asked. "I sent a picture of the big baby to be to the DA's office and they handled the rest." Daddy said cheerfully. "..Man I know he pissed off some of the DA last month when they tried to give him a lecture but.." Deku said and rubbed the back of his head. "oh so he's just a ray of sunshine for everyone huh?" any further conversation was drowned out as hearing how he might actually be stuck in baby land for two whole fucking months, Katsuki lost the battle of will's and the back of his massive diaper started to fill up. a little meter even appears as the mushy mess poured out of him, going from 'clean' to 'oppise poopise' in a matter of seconds and heading for 'whoa, stinky' at a alarming pace. "awwww see? I knew my little guy was backed up! Oh! Receiving data from the DA...Update file...There's my good little Katsuki! who's a good super pooper? and such a silly baby, trying to hide!" Daddy coo'ed and then two arms came out and dragged him out from his half way hidden spot under the crib. a rocking horse was moved over as Katsuki was picked up in the air and he shook his head no over and over, but was planted with a SQUISH anyways. "Ride'em cowboy!" Daddy encouraged and Katsuki lost it and was full on bawling, even as he was forced to rock back and forth.

One week later and Katsuki had semi gotten used to his new daily routine. it didn't mean he liked having to wear and use diapers or the stupid fucking baby food or formula..but after 3 days of being gagged except for when eating he'd learned to keep his opinions to himself. he was just a baby in daddy's eyes after all as he was reminded. He got used to the squishy warm wetness that came with a wet diaper though still bawled like..well a baby every time he pooped though he made a honest to god effort to load his diapers at least twice a day to avoid anther enema. Making things so much worse for poor Katsuki was the fact that somehow it'd gotten leaked where he was, though both the warden and Deku claimed it wasn't either of them, and as such other students from the school LOVED to come back and watch Katsuki in his baby punishment. Katsuki didn't even think they should of been able to get in but the bastard warden was handing out passes like candy on Halloween night. Still, Deku had promised he'd follow up on getting Katsuki's appeal put though and get him out, and he should be getting out either today or the next. Or so he thought till a sheepish and squirming Deku visited him. "Ummm.. Sooo I have some bad news." he said. "..Don't tell me they rejected the appeal!?!" Katsuki whimpered and whined. "Uh..yeah..see..It's a little bit worse then that. After reviewing the footage and all the facts..the judge decided that you not only deserve the two months in here..he..might a added 3 month on top." "WHAT!?! But..But..I..But.." Katsuki whimpered, plopping on his diapered behind and picking up a nearby stuffie, cuddling it. "T-That's..thats not fair!" "W-well he says as a hero in training..you need to be held to a higher standard..and thanked me for pushing so much on the appeal, he wouldn't of thought of it otherwise..soooo..uh..Sorry?" Deku squeaked out. "Your sorry? Your SORRY!? I'm the one who's gonna be crapping his pants for almost half a year and YOUR sorry!?!" Katsuki growled. "Little man.." Daddy warned. "uh..Katsuki..you might wan-" Deku started but Katsuki tossed the stuffie at the wall. "know what? FUCK IT! If I'm gonna be here and get a stupid diaper punishment I might as well fucking earn it. fuck YOU! fuck DADDY, and fu-" was as far as he got before the gag was popped back in. "I'm sorry Deku, somebody is cranky and need a little time out. please come back later." Daddy said. Not wanting to watch whatever punishment the blond was about to get, Deku nodded and walked away, wondering if he maybe should of mentioned that every time daddy was forced to punish Katsuki, the blond would get a week added. 'Nah..I'll just mention it to him tomorrow when I visit.'

the end?

[taeswurld]

Ace VII [8 fucking 30]

pairing: bakugo x fem!reader

genre: humor, romance

TW: violence, cursing, angst, fluff

Summary:

Shifting into My Hero was a total mistake, all those tiktoks you watched on a daily about shifting somehow convinced your brain to take part. Now the question is how to wake up, and most importantly, DON’T GET ATTACHED TO STUPID DRAWINGS!

A/N:

Yuhhhhh i made a new chapter. Reblog and like for clear skin hotties! 

{ACE MASTERLIST}

Once you finished resting up, and once everyone cleaned up their appearance, you all decided to pay a visit to a certain superhero to see if they could help you figure out your little problem.

Well, not little problem. Big problem. Very big problem. 

“Hey Y/N,” Midoriya began as he walked besides you and Hiro. “Do you by any chance remember All Might? Or Mr. Aizawa?” 

You shook your head and looked down. “Sorry Midoriya, I don't really remember anything. I mean, the names sound familiar, but I can't exactly put faces to them. All my memories are blobby.” 

“What the fuck does blobby mean?” Bakugou asked as he stomped behind you. 

“You don’t know what blobby means, Bakugou?” You asked as a smirk covered your face. “Come on dude, catch up with the lingo.” 

“Shut up! No one know what you and your stupid vocabulary means half the time anyways. You always sprouting some stupid shit.” He scowled. 

“Yeah Bakugou,” Todoroki grinned. “Catch up with the lingo.” 

“Shut the fuck up, Teapot.” He growled. 

“Hey! Before you two get into another fight,” Midoriya intervened. “I suggest we get this problem fixed first.” He gave them a hard glare. 

“Whatever. The only reason why I’m here is because I don’t need Y/N’s dumbass making us look weak.” 

“Yeah, yeah,” You said rolling your eyes. 

Dear God, this guy was infuriating. 

“We get it dude. I’m weak and stupid and you’re the greatest Hero ever. Woopie.” You said pouring as much sarcasm as you could into your voice. 

“Hey, cut it out, you two.” Midoriya said. “We’re here. I overheard they were going to have a teacher meeting, so let’s just wait outside until they're done.” 

You turned away from Bakugou and turned to look at a huge door. You could hear slight muffles, but nothing too clear. As much as you wanted to eavesdrop, you couldn’t bring yourself to disrespect the people who are probably going to determine your future. 

The four of you decided to sit against the wall, with Midoriya to your right and Todoroki to your left. Hiro was being stiffly pet by Todoroki, while Bakugou sat in front of you. 

“So what was your life before you were morphed here?” Todoroki asked. 

“Nothing special,” you shrugged. “In my dimension, or whatever, there was this huge pandemic that pretty much took over the world. It's like, highly contagious, so we can't leave our house. I did school online and pretty much have stayed home. You can’t exactly come into contact with too many people.” 

“Sheesh, a pandemic?” Midoriya asked. 

“Yeah, it was pretty bad, a lot of people died. And it sucks. But I’ve stayed home a lot. Other than that nothing interesting’s been going on in my life. Literally go on tik tok everyday for like 3 hours everyday though.” You said with a small smile. 

“Tik what?” Bakugou asked with a furrow in his brows. 

“Nothing. Just a stupid app. But what happened here? Like I wanna get an idea of what part of the timeline I’m in.” You asked, looking around. 

“Villains attacked us at U.A.” 

“We fought villains at the train camp where Bakugou and you were targets.” 

“I beat Deku’s ass.” 

“Okay! Okay! Maybe I should’ve been more clear.” You said putting your hands up to get them to pause on the talking. 

“Wait, Midoriya, he beat your ass?” You said giving him a disappointing look. 

“Hey! I didn’t actually expect an actual fight! And just for your information, I for sure won that fight” He said giving Bakugou a slight glare, but still grinning from ear to ear. 

“Oh yeah? You wanna go again shitty nerd?” Bakugou smirked. 

“I’ll be sure to record when Midoriya beats your ass into the ground.” Todoroki chimed in.

“Shut up, Half-and-Half. I’ll beat your ass too.” Bakugou turned to look at him. 

“As much as I would love to see that, I don't need you idiots destroying anymore school property.” 

The four of you looked up to see a pale man with long hair. He had eyebags that could go on for miles. And he had a white scarf around his neck. Honestly, the man looked like he hasn’t showered or slept properly in years. 

“Mr. Aizawa!” The boys exclaimed. The three of them quickly stood up to give him a bow. 

“Hey.” You waved, clearly not getting the hint to stand up. Hiro, however, gave the man a friendly bark and also stood up. 

“I see you still have your rude American customs Y/N. How many times I gotta tell you to bow to your sensei.” He said giving you a playful glare. 

“You can take the girl out of America but can’t take the American out of the girl.” you said, giving him a smirk. 

He sighed, looking used to your snarky comments. “Well, get on with it. Why are you all here?” He asked looking towards Midoriya. 

“Well, we have a slight problem. You know how she had that accident last night?” Midoriya began. 

“She stupidly lost all her skill and any memories of how to work that idiot quirk of hers.” Bakugou chimed in. 

“What? Y/N, explain.” Aizawa said sternly. 

“Okay, well, I’m not actually from this dimension.” you stood up looking at the man nervously, hoping he doesn't kick you out for what you’re about to say. 

“I was transported here last night. Or was it this morning? Well anyways, I’m not actually from here and in my dimension we don’t have powers, or quirks, or whatever, and I don't even know what I’m doing here because I’m totally supposed to be in first period right now, or is it third? I don't know but I don’t know if this is a dream, because to be quite honest, I’m like totally freaking the shit out, and I have this super duper power, and I don't know how to control it, and my dog apparently has powers too but I don’t know what it is cause we haven’t had the chance to test it out, but I make people’s ears bleed, and-” 

“Alright, enough!” His eyes glared a bright read and his hair stood up. 

Immediately, you shut your mouth, hoping not to get him mad. 

“So you don’t remember how to control your quirk?” You shook your head no. 

He sighed looking much more stressed than when he first saw you. “Okay here’s what we’re going to do.” He began. 

“Everyday, for the next 2 months, you will be training with these three troublemakers in hope of getting your control back. I’ll talk to principal Nezu about this and see if there's a reason why another version you ended up here in this dimension. I will also be asking All Might to supervise you four just in case anything happens. We’ll monitor your progress weekly.

“I’m not sure if your memory affects your knowledge on what we’ve been learning so far, like Math. I’ll be sure to ask your teachers to test you on what you’ve been learning.” He concluded. 

“Oh come on! Tests? That blows.” You complained. 

“As for your dog,” He said giving you a glare to shut you up again, “We can go ahead and use Midoriya’s notebooks and the file we have to check him out. As far as I can remember, you two are a team, he helps you gain control, and at the same time provides backup.” 

“We can take a look at my notes later, okay?” Midoriya turns to give you a reassuring smile. 

“Okay, well for now, I suggest the three of you go back to the dorms, take a shower, and wait for the rest of your classmates to get back. I’m not sure if this is a one-day thing, but I want you to get to bed early, got it Y/N? And I’m talking Bakugou-bedtime early, got it?” He said. 

“Yeah, don't worry. What time do you sleep, blondie? 10? 10:30?” You turn to ask. 

“Try 8:30.” Todoroki said, rolling his eyes. 

“8 fucking 30 dude? Are you insane?” You yelled, widening your eyes at the new information. 

“If you don't like it princess, it’s not my problem. Teacher’s orders.” He said smirking. 

“Am I understood Y/N? Also no more use of your quirk until there’s a certified adult around.” He said. 

“Yeah, yeah. I got it.” you said dejected at the fact that you would be sleeping at the time you ate dinner. 

You turned to glare at Bakugou, silently promising to yourself that if you ever managed to get your control back, you were going to participate in that fight the boys were talking about earlier to beat the shit out of Bakugou’s ass. 

taglsit: lanaxians-2 soft-levi-girl-blog

#bakugou katuski x reader #myhero #my hero academia x reader #bakugou x fem!reader #bnha #bnha bakugo katsuki #bnha bakugou #bnha ochaco uraraka #izuku midoriya #denki kaminari #shouto todoroki #Ochako Uraraka #eijiro kirishima #mina ashido #tenya iida #boku no hero academia #ace #anime #bakugo katuski #Katsuki Bakugō #my hero academia #bakugou x y/n #bakugou x reader #katsuki bakugo x reader #katsuki x reader #x reader #yn

[halfbloodglader]

And Yet (Minho)

Minho x ACE! reader -1,700 words

because we love a best friendo Minho :)

The rain had started and in no time soon was it going to disappear. Every single one of the Gladers was quick to fight against time and pack up any last bits of their work before they became saturated. Minho, however, rest quite contently with his legs up in his hammock. He’d been back from the maze for a while now having decided to turn back around noon after seeing clouds building overhead. Chuckling to himself, he leaned back and put his arms behind his head, letting his mind slip off to whatever dimension it pleased. 

Today, that just happened to be his running partner. That seemed to be a pretty common topic for his brain to latch onto as of lately. Anytime he had the slightest moment of silence, she filled his mind and there was no way of shaking it. Minho was fairly self-aware and knew it wasn’t because he was infatuated or in love with his best friend. His understanding of their relationship didn’t stop the invasive thoughts, though. As of late, he’d just been blaming it on the fact that he spent most of every day with her and he cared deeply for his friend. 

If you cared enough about someone, of course they’d be on your mind all the time.

“Where’s Y/N?” Newt broke Minho’s daydream like a glacier shifting, his face far too close and the overgrown mop of blonde hair shrouding his eyes. “It’s almost dinner, go find her would you?”

Minho recoiled when Newt smacked his shoulder impatiently. The runner scowled and sat himself up with a huff. “Ah, I guess I could do that. How much you gonna pay me?”

Still frustrated, Newt kicked Minho’s feet which now hung out from his hammock. “Nothing, Minho! She’s your friend too and I’ve got other things to deal with right now!” He threw his arms up in the direction of the homestead, the doorway crammed with boys trying to escape the sudden deluge. 

“Sheesh, apparently not even time for a joke.” Minho chuckled and stood up, patting Newt’s shoulder. “Don’t worry man, I’ll find her.”

“Good, get your lazy butt out of here!” Newt, for some reason, yet again tried to kick at Minho as he jogged off. 

As quickly as he could, Minho darted for the deadheads in order to take cover under the trees. It really was a no-brainer surrounding the case of the missing Y/N. She’d be in the maproom. She was a runner, liked quiet places where she could be alone and was possibly even more invested than Minho in finding a way out. 

Somedays, Minho felt sorry for her. She was the only girl here. Even though she did just find holding her own and got on well with everyone, she was still stuck in a stone box with fifty boys. It couldn’t be easy. There truly was no question as to what factors might have played into her becoming a runner. 

Other days, he was so glad she was here and was the only girl. No matter what, her opinion was valued above anyone else's. Frankly, she always had the best ideas, too. She cared for everyone and was the ears ready to receive at a moments notice when someone needed a place to mail their worries off to. In no way would this place be the same if she wasn’t here. And of all the girls in the world, she was probably the best of them all to be placed here the Glade. One, because she was very easygoing and had the attitude of one of the boys. Secondly, she had never shown interest in anyone here and had no problem kindly declining romantic advances. 

Just as he expected, opening up the maproom door, there was Y/N, half reclined against the wall. Some papers in her hands and feet every so slowly sliding away from her body on the loose-dirt floor. Quietly, Minho approached without her noticing and put his foot out to stop her feet from sliding anymore. Noticing the sudden halt of her feet, she lowered the papers and looked up to see Minho with a classic smirk carved deep into his face. 

“Newt send you?” Y/N asked, shifting her position so she was sitting up against the wall straighter, disregarding the papers. 

Minho tilt his head in question and sat across from her on the floor. “Yeah…how’d you know?”

Y/N stifled a little laugh and rolled her eyes. “He comes looking for me everyday before dinner. He must be busy with this storm though.”

“Oh my god, he’s busy alright.” Minho complained. “He kicked me, twice!”

“Wow!” Y/N gasped very animatedly, as if pretending to be shocked. “Two kicks? He must be super stressed!”

Minho broke into laughter and so did Y/N. They sat gasping for breath for a little while before finally collecting themselves and standing up. 

“So,” Minho went and opened the door. “Want to head back to the homestead and grab some dinner?”

“Yeah, sure.” Y/N agreed, putting on her shoes and bracing herself for the cold rain. She cheerily smiled up at Minho as she scrunched her shoulders up, ready to be hit with the cold.

“It’s not too bad,” Minho pushed Y/N out of the door haphazardly and followed behind her. “Especially if you run!” He blew past the girl, breaking into a sprint.

Minho hardly beat her there. 

“Finally,” Newt grumbled as he ushered the pair into the homestead and hurried to shut the door, preventing as much rain from pelting in as possible. “I thought you two got swept away in a flood or something as equally ridiculous.”

“Now that would have been interesting,” Minho nodded in amusement, pursing his lips and then looking to Y/N and trying to not break out in laughter. Newt was sure in a mood today.

“Go get your bloody dinners and head off to bed.” Newt ordered. “Because the sooner you do, the sooner I can get to bed. And I swear, if you two cause a ruckus I’ll—“

“We got it, Newt.” Y/N assured. “I’ll make sure Minho doesn’t burn the place down.”

“Good that.” He thanked the girl and let out a sigh of relief as he walked off. 

Snickering, Y/N and Minho got their meals and ate with a few of the other boys. After a while of talking, everyone decided it was time to pack it in and so Y/N and Minho said their goodnights before heading upstairs to his room. Many, many nights had the pair spent in here on rainy nights just sitting on the floor, talking about anything and everything. 

Just as usual, they situated themselves on the floor, staring out the window, talking about whatever first popped into their heads. Nights like these, they didn’t talk about the maze. When storms rolled in, it was their time to forget the world and all of their heavy burdens. It was their time to be the young people they truly were. 

After endless questions and horrible topics of discussion, Minho felt the allure of sleep enticing him. However, there had been one untouched topic that had been weighing on his mind for the past few hours. Granted, he’d been curious about it for a long time, but he’d never been itching this bad to actually find out.

“Okay, you don’t have to answer this question, and I might be stepping over some major boundaries here.” Minho suddenly seemed much more awake. “But…”

“Minho, it’s fine.” Y/N assured.

The keeper of the runners felt his confidence wavering. “I guess I’m confused about…well, I’ve never been able to understand…Understand why you aren’t with anyone. As in…”

"I know what you mean,” She stopped him before he had to further embarrass himself trying to find the right words to explain what he was thinking.

“There’s so many people here who would be with you in the blink of an eye given the chance. There’s no shortage of people who like you.” He said sternly, trying to catch her eyes in the dim light. “And yet…? You choose to be alone?”

Y/N was silent. Minho feared he’d hurt her.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have brought this up—“ Panicked, he tried to trace his steps back.

Y/N then shrugged and spoke softly. “I’m not alone though, I have all of you. I choose to not be with anyone like that because I don’t feel the need to. I don’t want to. It just isn’t an interest to me. As far as I can remember, it never has been.”

In the dark room, only slightly illuminated by the sheet lighting outside, Minho reached out and threw his arms over the shoulders of his friend. Y/N’s arms fell under his and she rest her head in the crook of his neck. They embraced one another tightly. Minho squeezed so hard his arms began to seize and Y/N felt how much he cared right deep in her chest. She cared just as much back.

Love came in so many different forms, especially here in the Glade. One could be more than happy and have a life full of intimacy without needing to fall into a relationship like most people expected. Some types of love didn’t need a label or to be explained. They simply had to be felt.

Minho did love her, in a way. And, now, he figured she loved him back just as well. 

“Thank you for being such a good friend, Minho.” The girl gave Minho one last tight embrace before letting go. 

Minho left his hands on her shoulders as she sat across from him. He smiled. “Thank you for being the best running partner I’ve ever had.” 

Y/N looked shocked, but in a playful way. “You…did you just say something nice?”

“Aye!” He snapped. “You caught me in a tender moment! It’s between us! Only us!”

#the maze runner #the maze runner imagines #the maze runner imagine #the maze runner x reader #the maze runner minho #minho the maze runner #minho tmr #minho imagine #thomas the maze runner #thomas tmr #the maze runner thomas #Thomas Imagine #the maze runner newt #newt tmr #newt the maze runner #tmr newt #tmr gally #gally the maze runner #gally tmr #the maze runner gally #gally imagine

[mcheang]

Social codes

I should think this counts under crack fic. Although this wasn’t based off an episode, I realize this reminds me of Big Time Secret. Takes place during Chat Blanc right after Marinette dumps Adrien.

Adrien’s warning surprises Marinette but she flees to the subway and escapes the akuma. Adrien follows her downstairs and transforms out of sight, he cataclysms the butterfly.

Adrien texts Marinette, who was about to transform, that the butterfly has been handled by Chat Noir. Marinette does not reply or respond to any of his calls.

Heartbroken, Adrien gets Alya to help him learn why Marinette broke up with him. Nino is currently with Adrien.

Alya agrees to help because she is so surprised and curious. Why would Marinette break up with her dream boy? (Not to mention after all the work Alya invested in their relationship, and having to listen to Marinette moan about her love life, Alya feels kind of cheated that all that would be for nothing.)

Alya leaves their phone call open as she interrogates a sobbing Marinette.

“The *sniff* the other day, Mr Agreste came to the bakery. *sob* He said I was ruining the Gabriel Agreste brand image and that I had to break up with Adrien or...or he would pull Adrien out of school!” she falls back into sobbing.

Adrien is stunned. Their BFFs are furious.

When Marinette explains that she couldn’t tell Adrien because he would confront his dad and get pulled from school, she begs Alya to keep it from Adrien.

Alya guiltily turns off her phone.

Adrien is stunned and very pale.

Nino is sympathetic and sorry for his friends, but also angry at Gabriel. Banning him from the house and refusing to let Adrien have a birthday party is one thing. But blackmailing his son’s innocent Girlfriend to break up with Adrien is another.

Nino gets reakumatized into Bubbler via his glasses. He doesn’t have a weapon. Bubbles just appear when he visualizes them.

Bubbler orders the bubbles to go after the adults again.

When he goes to Marinette to tell her the problem has been solved, Marinette’s alarm is derailed and she asked who told him that.

“Did Alya tell you that? Ugh! Does she tell you everything I told her? What happened to the girl code?”

Bubbler realized he messed up. He decides to send a ranting Marinette in a bubble to go join Adrien. Hopefully his bro can cool his angry ex-Girlfriend down.

Too bad Chat Noir was present when his Best Friend got akumatized. (The Bubbler left Adrien alone, with the promise that he’s Adrien’s wingman and will ensure Adrien and Marinette will get the happily ever after his bro keeps talking about.)

Marinette turns into Ladybug and summons a lucky charm. A magnet. She uses it to stick to a metal pole till Chat frees her. They both hide and wait to discharge.

Ladybug’s anger has cooled and her sadness has returned. Chat asks her what is wrong but she is unsure whether she should tell him.

Chat: I’m always here for you Milady. You know I would never betray your secrets.

At that Marinette sobs again. “I have to break up with my Boyfriend because his father won’t allow it. And it’s not fair because I haven’t done anything wrong!”

Children crying snaps Marinette out of her funk and she pulls herself together.

Fight yada yada yada. Timers prevent Chat from further talk with Ladybug.

When Nino is deakumatized, he comes across Marinette confronting Alya and she is furious to know Alya pulled a 3-way conversation on her. Does privacy mean nothing to the journalist?

Nino just got rescued and now his Girlfriend looks like she wants to murder him. Where’s an akuma when you actually want one?

“What’s next? Does Adrien tell you my secrets too?” This is to Nino.

Nino is freaking out and starts babbling. (Hell hath no fury like a Marinette). “No, no, dudette. Adrien has never spilled any secrets. He only asked me for advice. You know, like about Kagami and how to get you to accept expensive gifts, you know like that charm bracelet...”

Alya shuts Nino up who realizes belatedly he should have kept his mouth closed, but not before he reveals that Adrien told embarrassing moments on their dates that Marinette had wished confidential.

Marinette is mortified. “You know, breaking up with Adrien doesn’t feel so bad now because right now I can’t face any of you.”

Marinette runs up to her room to cry into her pillow, feeling betrayed and mortified. Nino is left to face the wrath of Alya.

Nino’s brain: meep

Later, Nino facechats Adrien and warns him that things got messed up.

“I’ve got good news for you. Marinette’s not breaking down now over your break up.”

Adrien perked up, “Did she find a loophole?” If anyone could find a way, it was his Lady.

Nino winced. “It’s more like she feels better about breaking up with you after you broke the Boyfriend code?”

Adrien was confused and cursed his homeschooling. “The what?”

“Yeah, Marinette’s not happy about some of the stuff you told me about. Apparently they were supposed to be just between the two of you.”

Adrien is confused before Nino’s earlier words settled in. Marinette was happy about breaking up with him? Why? Adrien was panicked. “Can’t Alya help us?”

Nino sulked, “Can’t. She’s mad at me because I broke the Boyfriend code too, and now Marinette’s mad at her for breaking the Best Friend code.”

Adrien was confused. Too many codes. “Slow down and break it down for me please.”

After Nino does so, Adrien regrets Chat’s words to Ladybug. He did betray his princess’ secrets. Adrien starts sobbing dramatically into his pillow.

Plagg rolls his eyes. Kids these days. He eats his cheese and offers some as consolation to the inconsolable Adrien.

The next day, the girls ignored Nino’s hopeful smile and Adrien’s kitten eyes. Alya just got back into Marinette’s good graces by giving her those pens with invisible ink that only show up in blue light.

Nino makes it up to Alya by proclaiming he got her an interview with Chat Noir. (Thank you Adrien!) Nino just assumes Adrien has connections and uses them. I mean Marinette got Alya that private interview with Ladybug...

Adrien is in a funk and it clearly affects his work and studies. When Gabriel threatens to pull him out of school, Adrien retorts that is his threat for everything, so what is the next threat once that carries out?

Gabriel doesn’t want to deal with teenage drama and instructs Nathalie to handle it.

Nathalie figures out Adrien is depressed that Marinette has broken up with him and this leads him to not care about anything else.

The evidence was obvious: she found Adrien staring dreamily at a shrine he dedicated to his Girlfriend. As well as stuffing his face full of the bakery’s pastries (courtesy of his friends who also unknowingly bring Plagg yummy cheese danishes) to try to deal with his heartache. Adrien doesn’t even get up early anymore.

Nathalie gets Gabriel to allow them to date but Adrien still isn’t happy because Marinette won’t even look at him anymore, and he blames it all on them. (Marinette refuses to look at Adrien so she won’t get her heart broken or she still feels some lingering mortification and betrayal.)

Nathalie sighs. Dealing with Dramatic Duusu is actually simpler than dealing with Adrien for once.

Nathalie brings the tablet with Gabriel’s face on it to apologize to Marinette so they can actually get decent work done. But Tom still forbids them to enter. Gabriel has to apologize in public to Marinette outside the bakery, admitting his wrongdoing.

This situation is actually more awkward for Nathalie.

Marinette is stunned by what just happened that she actually breaks her rule and calls Adrien.

He picks up immediately.

“How did you get your dad to agree to let us date?”

Adrien himself was baffled. He had been too depressed to pay attention to anything except akuma attacks since that was the only time Marinette would talk to him. “I have no idea. Maybe he had a change of heart?”

Marinette’s brain: unlikely

Adrien’s brain: Hello my love. You are as beautiful as ever, your radiance outshines the sun...

Adrien: does this mean you’re willing to talk to me again?

Marinette: I don’t know. Are you live-streaming our video conversation right now?

Cue Adrien begging for forgiveness.

Adrien: Apologies, Princess! I swear by all the Camembert in the world to never let one word between the two of us slip through without your explicit permission....(yeah, Plagg is going to hold him to that.)

Marinette: (laughing) Sheesh, you are such a dork.

Adrien: (kitten eyes activate) but I’m your dork.

Marinette: you are so lucky you’re cute.

Adrien: cute? Marinette, I am a model. I am not cute. I am beautiful.

Marinette laughs. “Ok, fine. Beautiful Adrien. How about you make it up to me? You can treat me to dinner.”

Adrien’s face lights up. “I’ll come over right now.”

“...Adrien...it’s only 2 heures.”

Adrien pouts. “But I miss my princess so much.”

Marinette giggles and admits, “I’ve missed you too, my prince. But I have work to do. You can come pick me up at 6.”

Adrien nods eagerly, looking more like a puppy than a cat. “Very well. See you then, Princess. I love you.”

“I love you too.” And you can just hear the sincere emotion in Marinette’s words.

End call.

Adrien sighs and falls back into his bed. His lady still loves him. She forgives him.

Plagg hovers over the teenager, cheese in his paws. “You are embarrassing.”

“I don’t really care right now.” Adrien sighs.

Eventually he gets down to planning the most romantic date yet.

Nathalie comes home to find Adrien focused since...well, since Marinette dumped him. She informs Adrien that she already booked a private booth for them at the Eiffel Tower Restaurant: Le Jules Verne.

Adrien happily thanks Nathalie and goes off to prepare his wardrobe. Thank God! It had been a disgrace to the brand to see Adrien walk outside with bed hair, shadowed eyes, rumpled clothes, and a distinct odour of stinky cheese. Gabriel about had a stroke at the sight of his Son in such a state.

The evening had been a success. Adrien had romanced Marinette that the night had ended in a very long makeout session that poor Gorilla had to wait through. Good thing he could just play Miraculous Crush.

All was right in Adrien’s world again. All breaches in codes had been forgiven. (Chat had been presentable for the interview in the hopes that a happy Alya would be a helpful Alya. It was a vain hope since Alya was wary of risking Marinette’s anger so soon after the former was forgiven.) Marinette was his Girlfriend again. And Plagg got to try restaurant-quality cheese too.

One week later, Gabriel questioned why Marinette seems to be a constant presence in his house when Adrien has Chinese right now.

Nathalie gives a helpless shrug. “Your Son claims it was our fault Marinette ended their relationship and he had been deprived of his girlfriend’s presence for long enough. He drags her everywhere now. To photo shoots and fencing practise where she and Adrien’s bodyguard play some app games. When Adrien has piano rehearsal and Chinese class, I’ve seen Marinette playing video games quietly in the background.”

“And this doesn’t interfere with his concentration?”

“Surprisingly, no. Adrien only gets distracted when she leaves the room.”

“And doesn’t Miss Dupain-Cheng have work at her family’s bakery.”

“Your Son has paid off his friends to work her shift...using your credit card, I might add.”

Gabriel is alarmed. Has his perfect son turned into a thief? “When did I give him that!?”

“When you told me to let Adrien know that Le Jules Verne was on your tab.”

Gabriel regrets breaking them up so much.

#adrienette #miraculous ladybug fanfic #miraculous ladybug fanfiction #miraculous ladybug fic #ml fanfic #ml fanfiction #ml fic #chat blanc #chat blanc fic #chat blanc fanfic #chat blanc fanfiction #bubbler #ladynoir #ml crack fic #miraculous crush #puppeteer 2 #chat blanc au

[ghostsray]

Ch14: Breathe

(first - previous - next)

Niel drifted across the sky, letting the wind brush against his invisible form. The city lights shone below him like stars on earth. As he floated along the wind, he thought about how strange it was that very few humans were able to experience flight the same way he did. Niel was born (or rather "born" in quotation marks) with his ghostly abilities and considered them a normal part of his life. Then again, most things about his life could hardly be described as normal.

As he flew, he saw the hard-to-ignore outline of Fentonworks, with its large UFO-shaped ops center on top. Seriously, the Fentons had a strange sense of architecture. He drifted closer and found a familiar boy sprawled out on the roof, gazing up at the sky.

A plume of blue smoke escaped Danny's mouth as Niel got close. Rather than leap into action, Danny just sighed and droned, "Who is it this time? That better not be Box Ghost again."

Niel invisibly grinned, and he moaned in his best Box Ghost impression, "Beware!"

He let his invisibility drop, showing himself hovering above Danny with his arms raised, fingers wiggling. Danny snickered. "Nice Boxy impression."

Niel landed cross-legged next to Danny's prostrate form. He traced his vision up to the sky, where the stars twinkled as if the cosmos were breathing. "Ellie said you like space."

"You mean you don't?" Danny replied with an eyebrow raised.

Niel gazed at the night lights in the sky. He had to admit, there was something comforting about them. Space was so vast, it made him feel small...but strangely calm at the same time. There was a whole universe that will continue to exist in spite of all the problems he went through.

Oh, great, he was starting to like astronomy.

"Ellie," Danny said, snapping him out of his thoughts. "You mentioned that name before. Is it your nickname for Dani?"

Niel wrinkled his nose. "Come on, calling her Dani has got to get confusing at times."

"Oh, absolutely. But it's also hilarious. Like how--"

"There's two Hawkeyes?" Niel guessed.

"And two Spider-Men. Also two Captain Americas. And Hulks. And Thors. And--"

"Geez, how many doubles are there in Marvel comics?"

"Like a lot, you have no idea."

Niel laughed, and Danny smiled. He was still lying on his back, looking up at the stars. But despite his smile and his jokes, he looked tense.

Niel looked away and fidgeted with his cape. "So...how are things with your family?"

Danny shrugged. "My parents who wanted to hunt me down for two years now know that I'm the ghost they wanted to kill and are super duper guilty about it. It's a little awkward, but hey, no big."

"You didn't have to reveal yourself to them."

Danny sighed. He pushed himself into a sitting position and stared down at his lap. "No. You were right...back when we first met. You said I was scared of my parents."

"Oh...I did say that, didn't I," Niel said sheepishly, remembering the day Danny and he met face to face and Niel had tried to get Danny to ditch his family in favor of Vlad.

"That's the thing," Danny continued. "I was scared, as long as they were planning on capturing Phantom. I had to tell them the truth. It was the only way to allow myself to breathe."

"And now you're okay with them?"

Danny nodded. Yet he still didn't seem relaxed.

"Are you sure?" Niel said with a frown.

"I am! Sheesh. You're my clone, not my sister."

Danny was pointedly not looking at Niel. Niel tried to lean into his vision, but Danny turned his head away.

At first, Niel figured he was still tense about his parents. Then he began to wonder if Danny was angry at him for some reason. Did he do something wrong?

Then he realized: Danny was avoiding looking at him the same way he did back in the lab.

Niel summoned the spot of warmth in his chest and turned into his human half. As soon as he did, Danny visibly relaxed. He even let out a small breath he had been holding.

"You're scared of my ghost half," Niel said.

Danny finally looked up at niel. He bit his lip guiltily and glanced to the side. "No, I'm not."

"Yes, you are."

He sighed defeatedly. "I'm sorry. It's not you. It's just...you remind me of someone."

"Is it Vlad?" Niel asked. He knew he had some of Plasmius's traits in ghost form, whether from the few genes Vlad gave him, or from unconsciously mimicking his dad's ghostly appearance. Vlad was the only one beside Danny that Niel knew he looked similar to.

But Danny shook his head. "It's not Vlad. It's..." He took a shaky breath and said, "It's me."

"You're...scared of your ghost half?" Niel asked, tilting his head.

"No! Not me me, it's..." Danny sighed and rubbed his face. "Sorry, this is a long story. It's a version of me I'm scared of."

Niel could definitely sense that it was a long story. He scooted close to Danny until the two were sitting side by side. "You mind telling it to me?" Niel asked.

Danny rubbed his neck. Niel could tell he was nervous, and he was about to give up listening to his story until Danny spoke, "I went to the future once."

"Because of Clockwork," Niel guessed. Danny looked up at him in surprise, and Niel shifted in place and quickly added, "I've heard of him. Ghost who controls time, right?"

He figured now was not the best time to admit that he had met the time ghost himself. Danny just nodded and continued with his story.

"Clockwork," he said. "He...well, his employers kind of wanted me dead."

"Why?"

"I kind of did something really bad in the future."

"It can't be that bad," Niel said. Danny was such a good guy. There was no way someone like him would do anything terrible.

Danny raised an eyebrow and asked, "Does causing the end of the world sound bad to you?"

Niel's jaw dropped. He waited for Danny to laugh and say he was kidding, but Danny was completely serious. Once Niel remembered how to form words, he said, "What?"

Danny hunched over, like he was trying to protect himself from the air blowing around them. His expression turned grim. "Apparently, my family died in that timeline, and that made me flip," he explained. "I...he killed his human half. Then the whole world. Even that wasn't enough, and I messed with all the ghosts in the ghost zone. I was...he was horrible."

Niel was so shocked that he didn't know what to say. He wanted to tell Danny something comforting, but of course, he inherited Danny's terrible social skills, so what came out of his mouth was instead, "I look like your future self? But I thought I look younger."

"It's Plasmius," Danny said. "For some reason, my future self absorbed Vlad's ghost half or something. I don't know. Probably a part of his flipping out saga."

"And that made him look like a mix of you and Plasmius," Niel said. He felt his gut churn with guilt. No wonder Danny couldn't look at him. He unconsciously moved his hand to his ear, which was round in human form, but he knew how much pointier it looked when he was a ghost...more like Plasmius than Phantom.

Danny brought his knees to his chest and hugged them. "So, yeah," he said, "I was that bad in the future."

"But that's not your future anymore, is it?" Niel said, growing a little nervous. "You would never turn into him."

"No," Danny agreed. "Clockwork made sure of that. I won't become Dan--uh, which is what I call him." He buried his chin into his knees and said in a small voice, "But I didn't have a change of heart so easily. When I first saw a glimpse of Dan in Clockwork's time window, do you know what I first thought?"

"That he's a bit of a jerk?" Niel ventured.

"That his powers were cool."

"Oh," Niel said. "Yikes."

In the night's darkness, Danny's normally azure eyes looked almost black. They looked down as he said, "It's not until I actually visited the future and saw for myself all that he had done, all the pain and destruction he caused, that I knew just how bad I could turn up." He lifted his head from his knees to take a deep breath and said, "But it's fine. I'm over that now."

Niel was skeptical of that last statement. Danny didn't seem very over that, not if he still tensed up at the sight of Niel's ghost half. "Are you?"

Danny's jaw set, and he stated, "I promised myself I would never become Dan."

Niel could sense an unspoken but. Danny didn't continue, so Niel prompted, "But...?"

Danny bit his lip and turned his head away from Niel. "But nothing," he lied.

"Danny, I'm practically a carbon copy of you," Niel insisted. "I know if you're hiding something."

Danny winced guiltily and buried his head between his shoulders. "But..." He glanced at Niel quickly before saying, "But you exist."

Silence. The words seeped into Niel's brain until he understood their meaning, and once he did, he was filled with rage. "Wait--you thought I would turn into him?"

Danny threw his hands up and exclaimed, "What was I supposed to think? You were talking about how you were made to replace me--"

"I wasn't going to actually do that!" Niel argued, bristling.

"You were raised by Vlad!"

That shout seemed to echo across the sky as Niel fell speechless. Both boys were silent apart from their ragged breathing. Niel turned away, and he said in a tiny voice, "Oh."

He thought that he and Danny had grown to become friends. But apparently, Danny still distrusted him as much as he had since their first meeting. He bit his tongue and glared down at the streets below.

Next to him, Danny's breathing softened. "I'm sorry," he said. "I didn't mean that."

Niel shook his head. "No, you're right. I was raised by Vlad...I am being raised by him."

He heard a slapping sound and looked up to see Danny facepalm himself. "I'm so stupid--here I am talking about my problems, and I didn't even think to ask about you and your dad."

Niel clenched his jaw and turned his sight back down. He had been holding on to the tentative hope that Vlad could become a better person, but now, he wasn't so sure. Still, he raised his chin and said with faux confidence, "I think he can change."

Niel expected Danny to respond with skepticism, or worse, outright disbelief. To his surprise, Danny mumbled, "Yeah, you're right."

He looked sideways and saw that Danny had returned his gaze to the sky, but his eyes held a distant look to them, like he was thinking back to an old memory. Niel wondered what made him consider Vlad capable of change. Did it have anything to do with the future he visited? But that didn't make sense...Dan absorbed Vlad, didn't he? Or was that just his ghost half? Could it be seperated?

Niel's head hurt. He didn't understand anything, but he was too afraid to ask.

A quietness settled between them. He looked up, watching the stars twinkle and the clouds move with every breath the sky gave.

"You're not a bad person, Niel," Danny broke the quiet by saying. "Regardless of whether Vlad decides to change or not. And...I know you're not Dan."

Niel wanted to believe him, but the more he thought about it, the more he realized Danny did have a point earlier--he was raised by Vlad, and he learned some morally questionable things from him. Besides... "I almost burned down a restaurant today," Niel recalled guiltily.

He didn't need to look to the side to imagine Danny grimacing. "Hey, at least I stopped you, right?" He saw Danny shift in the edge of his vision and turned his head to see the other boy facing him, his eyes fixed intently on Niel. "Maybe we can both watch over each other, make sure neither of us turns evil. We'll look after each other...as brothers."

"I thought you insisted I'm not your brother."

"That was before I got to know the real you underneath Vlad's brainwashing."

Niel felt a warm feeling grow in his chest, but he squashed it down. Instead, he said, "What do you call Ellie? Your cousin?"

Danny appeared to be caught off guard by his question. "Um, yeah."

"And I'm her brother," Niel said. "That makes us cousins, too."

Through the darkness, he saw Danny smile. "Alright, then, Cuz."

They turned their attention to the horizon, where the slightest hint of red light was climbing the black sky. Was it dawn already? He had spent nearly the entire night awake.

"It's late," Danny said, voicing both their thoughts. "I should probably head back inside."

Niel was already on his feet. Once they were both standing, they faced each other awkwardly and shook hands.

"Bye, Cuz," Danny said. "I'll see you at school."

Niel groaned and brought a palm to his face. "I can't believe I forgot about school."

Danny chuckled. "At least you have the weekend to catch up on missed work. Maybe you can text Sam for help. I know you have her number."

Niel kept his hand on his face to hide the blush that crept into his cheeks. "Yeah."

Danny moved toward the door leading downstairs. He paused and looked back to see Niel still standing in the same spot, unchanged.

"Um, you can change into your ghost form," Danny said. "I can handle it."

Niel gave him a small smile and said, "It's fine, I just want to stay here a bit longer, if you don't mind."

He pretended not to notice Danny's poorly veiled relief at not seeing him transform. Danny disappeared into his house, and Niel was left standing on the roof by himself.

The high altitude breeze was cool against his human skin. He took in a deep breath, then let it out.

He had already known that his dad was not the best person, and neither was he. But could he really become corrupted enough to turn into a world-ending monster? Was Danny right in believing people could change?

Ugh. He was barely half a year old, and already, his life was a complicated mess. He really hoped things aren't always this hard or confusing, but he had a feeling they will be.

After a few more minutes of breathing in air and watching the stars, he lept off the roof and transformed, letting the wind carry his ghost form home to a father who may or may not have been redeemed.

#the month of may is over but im still tagging this as #dannymay #dannymay2020 #danny phantom #niel masters #danny fenton #fic #fanfiction #fanfic #writing #mine

[bunny-wk-fanfic]

Could I possibly, maybe, get a cute fic with Kuwabara being all sorts of nervous about his first date with Kagome, who he met in class at college? Yusuke and Keiko can be his coaches, while Kurama is trying to make him all suave and debonair and Hiei is being Hiei? Cause I've been craving some Kuwa/Kag something fierce ❤

Despite what his friend was saying, he was nervous. His palms were sweating, and he kept rubbing them against his pants, and all he could do was try and smile at the conflicting advice he was being given.

“Uh, guys?” his nervous call went unanswered as the only couple in the room were more occupied with each other on whose advice he should follow.

“No, Yusuke, he shouldn’t display his power in front of the poor girl.” Keiko shook her head, frowning up at her smug fiance. “He might end up scaring her for life.”

Yusuke snorted. “It won you over, didn’t it?” he smirked in her suppressed cry of anger, easily taking the smacks to his arm as if they were nothing. Which, in his case, they probably were.

“Why- Oh, you ass!” her gaze narrowed when she realized that her slaps to his arm were doing nothing, instead, reaching up to snatch an ear and pull Yusuke to her height. Teeth gritted at his surprised yelp. “It’s their first date. First dates shouldn’t involve fighting of any kind! Ya got that!”

Turning away from the two that had been eager to help him when he first revealed his interest in a classmate, he turned to a certain redhead that appeared amused by the couple obviously lost in their own world. “Kurama?” when he had his friend’s full attention, he offered a shaky smile. “Ya got any advice that I can follow?”

Smile turning into something, suave, Kurama nodded his head. “Of course.” red hair was flicked over his shoulder as green eyes took on a more golden hue. “Make the entire night about her. Compliment her, keep eye contact with her throughout the night. It would be better to keep some form of physical contact with her as well. You’re the male in the relationship, so take the lead but be polite and subtle about it.”

Kuwabara had been nodding his head, understanding some of what his friend was saying, but it slowed before stopping completely when the advice would end up hurting his chances with the girl more than help him. “Say what now?”

“If, for whatever reason, she seems to be bored with whatever you’re talking about, don’t be afraid to show her that you have options.” more of the kitsune spirit began to leak through, the tone and words taking on a slightly more devious quality to them. “Flirt with other women if you have too. You might even be able to swing both women into a night-!”

Keiko’s screech and a resounding slap interrupted Kurama’a continuation, thankfully in Kuwabara’s opinion. He wiped his brow with the back of his hand as his friend blinked a few times, coming back to his senses. “What did you ask for again, Kuwabara?”

“Tips on my date tonight?” his smile was still sheepish, hoping that Kurama would now have valid advice and dreading that it could also spiral into something that may have sounded like a skin flick reject.

“Oh, yes!” green eyes brightened. “Be polite and courteous. In these days, give her the option when it comes to certain things, but also let her know it’s no trouble. Such as paying for the meal, opening doors for her.”

Swallowing, Kuwabara soaked up the more helpful advice. This was something that Kurama often did when he accepted a few rare dates with a coworker or classmate of his own. Seeing it work for his friend had been the main reason he asked Kurama for assistance, he didn’t want to think about what could happen should their relationship became more intimate.

Looking back up, he halted when he saw that Kurama was currently attempting to keep Keiko from scaring Yusuke too badly when the filter between his brain and mouth apparently stopped working. Instead, he turned to the last member that could offer some sort of words of wisdom, if he was willing. Seeing the heavy red gaze on him, he took a chance to ask. “Anything you want to add?”

Hiei snorted, gaze turning away. “I couldn't care less if you mate the wench or kill her. I’m just happy Yukina got over her little infatuation she had with you.”

Blinking, he pulled back at his words. “Yukina had a crush on me?” the scowl his question earned had him attempting to real back to save his neck. It was somewhat flattering that Yukina had a crush on him, he would have thought she’d be more attracted to Kurama or another yuki-onna. But, like Hiei, she proved to be more than what she appeared to be. “Ah, don’t worry, don’t worry! I see her as a sort of kid sister!”

Obviously sensing the truth in his words, Hiei scoffed once again and turned away to observe the world outside of the window he claimed as his current perch. Looking at the clock, Kuwabara stood up from his seat and attempted to straighten out his outfit. “Well, I gotta get going, guys. Thanks again for all your help!”

Keiko and Kurama looked up at him with bright smiles. “Good luck, Kuwabara. She’s a lucky girl.” Keiko’s comment had him ducking in an attempt to hide his blush.

“I agree. You ‘ll do fine, just be yourself.” Kurama muffled Yusuke’s mouth, no doubt stopping any raunchy comments from being heard.

With another wave, Kuwabara left and made his way to where he was picking his date up, from her home. He found it admirable that she took such a long trip to get to and from their university, so she could stay and help her family with their home. When he came to the right address, he now understood what she meant by not being surprised and waiting for her to come to greet him. Looking at his watch, he realized he was early, so he decided to climb the steps that led up a steep hill. To think that she walked up and down these steps every day! Although, they weren’t as many as at Genki’s place, but there were still a lot.

Cresting on a humble shrine, he was instantly wowed by that large tree that towered over the courtyard, the late evening sun casting the tree’s over the small home that was tucked away in the back, guiding his way. There had never been a tree that he crossed paths with that felt like that huge tree, it was calming and now it was no wonder how his date seemed to maintain the same air around her all the time.

When he knocked on the front door, a boy blinked up at him. “Woah.”

Smiling, Kuwabara waved in greeting. “Hiya, little fella. Your sister home?”

The boy didn’t answer him, instead his eyes narrowed as he looked him up and down. “You’re weird looking.” with a shake of his head, ignoring Kuwabara’s slight miffed expression, he opened the door wider allowing him entrance as he called out into the house. “Sis, your date is here!”

“Coming!” her voice echoed from somewhere upstairs, instantly easing Kuwabara’s growing tensions.

Closing the door, the boy looked back at him, gaze still narrowed and lips pursed. “You better not do anything to her.”

The accusing tone had Kuwabara jumping to defend himself. “Oh! No! No, I would never!” he was just about ready to jump and defend his honor. If there was one thing his sister made her he knew growing up, it was to treat women right and with the utmost respect.

“Souta! Quit it!” exasperation accompanied by quick steps, had both turning stairs, watching as a young woman they were waiting for approached.

To saw Kuwabara was floored would be an understatement. He always thought she was pretty, but right now, she was beautiful. She left her hair free to curl about her shoulders, a dark blue dress that had faded flowers printed brought to point just how petite she truly was but made her all the more feminine. Simple silver earrings with a matching simple delicate chain was all she wore for jewelry, and as for makeup, perhaps some mascara and tainted lip gloss.

“Kuwabara!” her expression immediately bloomed into a bright smile, cheeks blushing slightly as she reached his side. As she stood on the tips of her toes, she tugged his taller frame to meet her half-way so she could kiss his cheek. “I told you that I would meet you at the bottom of the stairs.”

“Nah.” smiling down at her, he forgot all his worries when her small hands kept holding onto his arms as she slowly dropped back to her feet. “I’ve climbed more than that. And it wouldn’t be proper to make you climb all those stairs alone on our first date.”

Both of them blushed when his words seemed to make them realize that they were going out as a couple on their first date. The moment was interrupted when Souta spoke up. “Sheesh, talk about a couple of saps. I’m gonna get a cavity with all this sweet lovey-dovey crap.”

Kagome’s expression soured when she turned to her brother. “Keep that up, and Hitomi won’t stick around for much longer.”

Souta blushed and backed away from his angry sister. “I- I- I’ll be leaving now! Have fun! And if you hurt her, I’ll hunt ya down, ya got that!”

Kuwabara chuckled, but agreed to Souta’s threat, welcomed him to keep his promise even. He smiled when Kagome huffed and shooed her brother away. “So annoying!” her cheeks flushed as she pouted.

“He’s just doing his job as a brother!” Kuwabara chuckled when he poked a puffed out cheek, mentally cooing at how cute she was. “Are you ready?”

With another huff, she muttered about just needing to put her shoes on. He happily helped her, giddy when she accepted his held out hand to keep her balance. With a few careful taps, she looked back up at him with a bright smile. “I am now!”

Grin widening, he turned them to the door, bidding her family farewell with a promise to bring Kagome back home at a reasonable hour and unmolested, he set them out on their first date.

“I’m happy you accepted.” he was on cloud nine with Kagome on his arm, there was nothing that could get him down.

Ducking her head, Kagome blushed as she peeked up at him “I’m happy you asked.” a quick kiss to his cheek nearly caused him to trip and drag her down with him. Her giggles echoed around them as they walked down the sidewalk, Kagome asking if he was alright and him assuring her that he was.

#prompts #fanfiction #crossover #anime #Yu Yu Hakusho #Kazuma Kuwabara #Kurama #Keiko Yukimura #Yusuke Urameshi #Heie #Kagome Higurashi

[screensirenfic]

Black Leather - Chapter 29

It took another forty minutes to get this trash heap battle ready; most of our time spent turning the bus into a makeshift bomb shelter to withstand the wrath of some inter dimensional creature that, lets not forget, we weren’t even sure actually existed.

At least Steve had finally managed to get the boys to pitch in, though they’re idea of helping seemed more like arguing over petty shit that really could wait till later; maybe after we weren’t counting down the seconds to a monster attack.

Still; me and Steve had managed to corral the troops onto the bus, and pour a gasoline trail from the door to the meat pile to guarantee we can light up this fucker like a barbecue with minimal risk to the kids.

Now all that was left to do was wait, something that was easier said than done considering keeping the kids calm and on the bus was like herding toddlers, but not because they were nervous.

The kids seemed far too eager for this show to start; as if it was one big fucking game of laser tag rather than a potential life and death situation.

Despite the risk and the newfound responsibility; me and Steve remained pretty damn calm all things considered.

We were sat on the bus seats next to each other; my feet propped in his lap and my shotgun nestled in my arms, looking very ma and pa for two ragtag teenagers waiting on a monster battle.

Steve kept fiddling with my lighter, flicking it on and off in a visible nervous tick that disrupted the illusion of coolheaded leader.

Across the aisle, Max sat alone, watching us with contemplative eyes, as if us being here at all confused her.

“So you thought one of these things before?” She asked; no disbelief in her voice, just interest.

“Yup.” Steve confirmed nonchalantly, popping the p with insane casualness as if we were talking about the weather or something.

“And you’re like; totally one hundred percent sure it wasn’t a bear?” She continued to question, and look; there was that disbelief I was waiting on.

“If it was; it was a pretty fucking freaky looking bear then.” I chirped, though my words fell flat; coming out clipped and tense.

“Shit. Don’t be an idiot, okay? It wasn’t a bear.” Interrupted Dustin from the back of the bus, finally breaking his silent sulking.

It seemed the kid still hadn’t gotten over the fact he might lose her to his best friend, and decided that the right person to be mad at was her; rather than his romantic rival sat on the roof.

“Why are you even here if you don’t believe us?” He continued to spit, rising from his seat to walk up to her face on.

“Just go home.” He barked, and I kinda wished he had that kind of confidence in the first place; would’ve saved him a lot of heartache if he’d just confronted her about his feelings all along.

“Sheesh! Someone’s cranky. Past your bedtime?” She retorted sharply, before getting up from her seat and climbing up the ladder to the roof.

Poor girl. She didn’t even know why Dustin was so mad; had no idea of the massive crush on her.

Why did boys have to be so damn constipated when it came to feelings?

Fuck; if I knew.

“That’s good. Just show her you don’t care.” Steve praised Dustin, and I had to hold off slapping him around the back of the head, because really?! That’s what he got from this?!

“I don’t.” Dustin replied, already pacing up and down the bus, and I was beginning to think I’d missed a big part of the picture back in the woods; because when did this become Steve’s advice?!

“I’m sorry; did I miss something?” I asked; mainly directing my question at Steve.

If we survived this we were gonna have a serious question at setting an example for the kids, and Jesus; I was sounding like a mother again!

“No. Nope. Nothing.” Steve lied blatantly, and believe me when I say Steve was a terrible liar.

We were so having this conversation when this was over...

And why the hell was Steve winking at Dustin?

“Why are you winking Steve? Stop.” Dustin spoke my thoughts, because at least someone here had some emotional maturity; even if that person was thirteen; and Jesus; Steve was doing it again!

“Enough, Steve.” I instructed, holding the lighter shut whilst I was at it, because Steve was becoming annoying, and I don’t think I could go the rest of the night without braining him if he kept this up.

———————————————-

So I managed to make Steve settle down and not act like a complete child, meanwhile the actual child was still pacing up and down like an elderly war widow, and my other charges were up top, probably sucking face if Max was anywhere near as petty as I wa—

Fuck! And not in a good way.

An ear piercing shriek that was somewhere between Godzilla and the Queen Xenomorph in Alien echoed across from the other side of the junkyard.

Steve, Dustin and I immediately got to our feet, making our way over to where we left some strategic gaps in the barricades on the bus windows.

Steve and I got there first, peering through at what appeared to be a completely deserted junkyard; mist rolling out over the metal skeletons of cars.

“You see him?” Dustin asked; peering over our shoulders to try and take a look.

“No.” Steve replied, eyes still scanning over the landscape outside.

“Lucas; what’s going on?!” Dustin yelled upstairs way louder than I’d like, making Steve and I both grimace with disapproval.

“Hold on!” The other kid- no; Lucas, yelled back.

We waited on baited breath for our elected lookout to put his binoculars to good use.

“I’ve got eyes. Ten o’clock.” Lucas instructed, and I immediately swivelled my head to the left, my eyes scanning for a sign of—

“There.” I pointed, honing in on a shadowy doglike figure on the outskirts of the junkyard.

“What’s he doing?” Dustin asked, leaning in real close, because apparently this kid knew nothing about personal space.

“I don’t know.” I replied, trying to make out more of the suspect demogorgon, but unable to see much else in the shadows.

The demogor— Dart, began walking towards the pile of meat; slowly and cautiously like a stray dog, and if not for the starkly reptilian colouring, I could be convinced he was one.

He stalked closer and closer to the meat, and for the time being, it looked like our plan would work and we’d have bagged this sucker before curfew.

Thirty feet... then twenty... then fifteen... and then ten.... and

Stop.

Dart just stopped dead in his tracks, like he suspected something was up, but that was impossible; that would mean he...

“He’s not taking the bait. Why is he not taking the bait?” Steve asked; a slight hint of panic edging on his voice as he voiced the question we were all thinking.

“Maybe he’s not hungry.” Dustin suggested, surprisingly calm, all things considered.

“Or maybe he’s sick of cow.” I said; reality dawning upon me, because of course! The demogorgon didn’t want to be fed; it wanted to hunt! That meant it needed—

“Steve; what are you doing?” I asked, watching as he got to his feet and began stripping off his jacket.

“Helping.” Steve stated matter-of-factly as he swiped up his nailbat with one hand.

“Steve; where are you going?” Dustin began to panic; alarmed that our all star quarterback seemed to be making a break for the outside world.

Steve didn’t answer, already making his way to the front of the bus.

I followed him, grabbing hold of my shotgun ready to hold him at gunpoint if it meant stopping him from doing something stupid.

“Steve; I’m not letting you do this...” I objected, standing between him and the exit, because Steve was already a white knight; I didn’t need him to be a martyr.

“I’m not asking you to, Lo.” Steve countered, moving to step past me.

“Steve; this is suicide!” I argued, grabbing hold of his arm in an attempt to stop him.

There was no way I was letting him do this!

“Then spot me from the roof.” He instructed, gently pushing my gun towards me, as if playing sniper was a good counteroffer for letting him play bait.

“Spot me from the roof!” I scoffed, following as he went to open the door of the bus, because no; he didn’t get to be a hero, whilst I sit with the kiddies like a good damsel.

“Steve Harrington; if you think for one minute I’m gonna sit pretty on the roof whilst that thing makes lunch meat out of you; you’re dumber than I thought...” I lectured, positioning myself as a suitably pissed of human barricade between him and the door.

“Then what the hell do you expect me to do?” Steve asked; whining and protesting at me ruining his action movie moment.

“Let me come with you.” I countered, because when Steve was in white knight mode; there was no way he was leaving it, but godammnit; I was coming for the ride.

Steve stared back at me; looking for an opening or an excuse, but I wouldn’t give him one.

I was Lola Fucking Hopper, and if anyone was gonna out-stubborn me it wasn’t gonna be a six foot pretty boy.

Then Steve relented, nodding in agreement at me, because dumb or not; he knew when he was beat.

He moved to open the door, when Dustin rushed up front; panic colouring his face and voice.

“Would someone please tell me what’s going on?!” He asked, eyes flickering wildly between the two of us.

Steve gave me a look; one we’d shared a thousand times since we were kids.

It was the we’re about to something painfully stupid and borderline dangerous look.

I loved that look.

“Get ready.” He said, turning his attention back to the kid with ominous words of wisdom.

He pulled my lighter out of his jeans pocket and tossed it towards Dustin.

Dustin clumsily caught it mid air, looking at it like it was a live hand grenade.

“Hey?! What am I supposed to do with this?” He panicked, but it was too late.

Me and Steve had already stepped off the bus and into the night.

#stranger things #stranger things 2 #stranger things fandom #stranger things2 #strangerthingsfanfiction #fanfic #strangerthingsfanfic #fanfiction #stranger things oc #strangerthings oc #original character #jim hopper daughter #hopper daughter #Billy Hargrove #billy hargove x reader #billy hargrove fanfiction #steve harrington #steve harrington x reader #dustin henderson #Lucas Sinclair #Max Mayfield

[pepperf]

2017 fic roundup

I was tagged for this a(bout a month ago, sheesh) by @catty-words, one of the sweetest and loveliest people I have the pleasure of calling a friend. *HUGS*

That said, doing this was a little depressing, when compared to 2016 - so thanks for that, hon! ;-) But it’s mainly for a good reason (new job that I actually enjoy and which keeps my brain busy), so that’s kind of okay really. I just miss being properly involved in a fandom.

Total 2017 Word Count: 34,603 (9 fics) Total 2017 Hits: 9,466 Other 2017 AO3 Stats: Kudos: 902; Comment threads: 84; Bookmarks: 78; Subscriptions: 28.

Total 2016 Word Count: 110,113 (24 fics) Total 2016 Hits: 23,744 Other 2016 AO3 Stats: Kudos: 1507; Comment threads: 301; Bookmarks: 115; Subscriptions: 45.

Links and titles to 2017 works:

Fate Goes Ever As It Must: The 100, Pangur Ban AU, Bellamy/Clarke, 6171 words. Clarke is a medieval nun who makes illustrated manuscripts, Bellamy has a talking cat. It was a thing.

Slow Burn: The 100, Bellamy/Clarke, 2555 words. Canonverse AU. Clarke decides to woo Bellamy.

A Whole Lotta Grown-Ass American Women: The 100, Ghostbusters AU, 2768 words. Clarke, Raven, Octavia, and Lexa as the Ghostbusters.

You Are The Opera (Always On Time And In Tune): Community, Annie Edison/Jeff Winger, 12165 words. AU following 603 Basic Crisis Room Decorum. Most of this was written a while ago, I just finished it in 2017, so that knocks about 10,000 words off my actual total written last year.

Touchstone: The 100, Bellamy/Clarke, Stargate AU, 1612 words. Bellamy and Clarke are rival leaders of Gate teams. Apparently I like doing AUs in t100 fanfic.

It’s A Boy!: The 100, Bellamy/Clarke, Stargate AU, prequel to the above fic, 1736 words. Bellamy gets de-aged, because Stargate has all the best tropes.

Self-Rescuing Princess: The 100, Bellamy/Clarke, 4735 words. My take on what could happen for the big s5 reunion.

And This Is Why I Sojourn Here: Community, 792 words. It all makes sense: his uncanny abilities as a lawyer, his amorality and deviousness, his weirdly pointy good looks... Jeff is a fairy.

Nothing I’d Like Better Than To Fall: The 100, Bellamy/Clarke, John Wick AU, 2069 words. Clarke is an assassin for hire (retired), and she has just had the WORST day.

Favorite Fic: You Are The Opera. I like the stuff I wrote two+ years ago best. :7

Hardest Fic: All of them have been like pulling fucking teeth. I have three I’m determined to finish (all Community), and a ton of WIPs that I’d love to write. And if I find the inspiration, a load of follow-ups, but I honestly can't see that happening.

Do You Plan to Take Prompts in 2018?: Honestly, this depends on me finding time, energy, and inspiration. It might well take finding a new fandom that hits me as hard as Community did, and those come about once every ten years, tbh. So, it’s unlikely. :(

What was the best thing about 2017?: That I did actually get some stuff written, actually more than I'd thought. I was really glad to finally post You Are The Opera, I'm really please with some of the lines in that.

What was the worst thing about 2017?: Having lots of ideas and no time or energy. I MISS WRITING! I MISS THE INTERACTION WITH YOU GUYS!

Any last thoughts for 2017?: Shoutout to MizVickers on AO3, who has been going through all my Community fics and commenting on them - I’m failing to respond, but bless you for it, I do notice and appreciate it! And also to everyone else who reads and hits kudos/comments, every single one gives me a boost, and makes me want to get back to writing. I love you all. :)

Also, I want to express my eternal appreciation for @bethanyactually, who I was privileged to meet, this year. The fact that I’ve produced anything this year is largely down to her, and she’s unfailingly supportive, without being pressuring.

Goals for 2018: Finding a way to fit writing back into my life. I actually love my new job, and that’s half the problem (I know it’s a GOOD problem, don’t get me wrong): my brain is actually focused on work. But I really do miss writing, so now that I’m more settled in, maybe I can find time. Coming up with ideas in the car, now I’m more familiar with driving? Writing on train journeys, if I can find a way to get over people reading over my shoulder, or find a way to shield my screen? Writing when I’ve got overnight trips? These should all be possible, in theory.

#fic roundup #fic by pepper #2017 fic #I drafted this response ages ago but I hate creating links on my iPad and I hate typing on my laptop #so #it's taken a while to actually post

[shewhowantsmouseears]

Love Like Lava, 10

Notes: As always, big thanks to my editors Drucilla and BlueShifted!

MICKEY SHE LOVES YOU, SOMEONE SMACK THIS BOY WITH A CLUE BY FOUR.

Also, Neraja and Garma are disney characters from the comic book series Wizards of Mickey!

Summary: As Mickey seeks advice for the questions in his heart, Donald faces a mysterious burden from the Sisters of Fate.

Mickey truly and deeply loved his odd family of mermaids and nereids, despite the headaches and annoyances they could give him on a daily basis. They weren't the smartest fish in the sea, but they had good hearts and treated him well. Yet when Mickey headed out that day to see them, it was with great reluctance and hesitation. He needed help with a problem and he had no one else to turn to. The Axelias only knew what Mickey told them, and as for Minnie...well, the problem was about her. That was everyone here in his social circle, so he had no choice but to turn to his girls for aid. Whether they'd actually be of use was anyone's guess, but he had to try.

Their usual morning started out as it always did. He gave them whatever trinkets they had previously requested, they gave him fresh fish to eat, and then they dissolved into babbling about whatever sparkly thing had caught their attention an hour or two ago. Once everything appeared to have settled, Mickey loudly cleared his throat to get everyone's attention. The majority of the women turned their heads, but one or two still kept their conversation going. Mickey didn't mind.

“I need to ask you girls some questions,” Mickey said, his cheeks already starting to burn despite the whole embarrassing ordeal having only just begun. “But you can't tell anyone else about this, okay? Not even Minnie.”

“Why not?”

“Is this a new rule, like the No-Aphrodite rule?”

“You broke the rule!”

“I did not!”

“Minnie is very pretty, I like Minnie.”

Clearly things were off to a fantastic start. “Because I said so, that's why,” Mickey cut in before they could distract themselves even further from the topic at hand. Thankfully the girls appeared to accept his curt reasoning. “All right, first question. I know some of you got boyfriends and girlfriends and folks you...you...” Oh boy, the word itself was already giving him trouble. “You know, you... you really...” He desperately hoped they'd catch on so he wouldn't have to say it, but instead he merely had an audience of slow blinkers. “You...you...” He cleared his throat again and turned his head away, mumbling, his tongue feeling like taffy. “Okay, just...how do you know when you...luh...luuuhhh...love someone?”

Growing up, Mickey had heard the mermaids and nereids happily talk about men they had caught for themselves. To Mickey, that whole concept had seemed as distant as any other island. When he listened to them talk, it often sounded more like they'd caught another shiny bauble than had any genuine feelings for someone. But every so often a mermaid would fall for another mermaid, or a nereid with a nereid, or one for the other. Young Mickey had difficulty understanding the difference between this and friendship. At first it didn't seem any different than how they treated the other girls. All of the women in the water hung off each other, complimented each other freely, gave away kisses, it was all standard. But little by little Mickey had taken note of the subtle nuances of each relationship – like Delphina and Cyrena, who sometimes went whole minutes without saying anything, instead more than content to lean on each other and stroke each other's hair. Or Eleni and Feodora, who instead of asking for jewelry for themselves instead asked Mickey to make something for their other, wanting to match perfectly.

If these strange, bubbling, happy feelings toward Minnie were love, then Mickey had to do something about it. But first he had to know if these strange, bubbling, happy feelings were love. Mickey needed things in his life to be precise and accurate.

The girls had never been asked such a serious question before, and they gave it serious thought – as serious as they could make it, anyway. “Kissing!” one nereid volunteered, her hair so thick that clown fish often hid in it to hide from predators. “When you love someone, you want to kiss them a lot!”

Mickey thought he was in trouble before an elder mermaid spoke up, wearing a self-made “scarf” of seaweed. “That's not true! You can love someone and never ever kiss them. My third husband and I never kissed but I loved him very much. Love isn't about touching. Love is about feeling.”

“Yes, feelings, feelings! It feels good!”

“Love feels very good!”

“I want to feel love!”

“I love you very much!”

“Aw, I love you very much too!”

Mickey snapped his fingers three times in a row to keep things back on track. “Look, I know love is a feeling. Sheesh.” He rolled his eyes. “I need to know if that's what I'm feeling! Or is it just friendship? How do I know which is which?”

Either Mickey wasn't being as sneaky as he thought he was, or his family was a whole lot smarter than he gave them credit for, because it was Aquata who looked him right in the eye and said while pointing her finger, “It's Minnie.”

“What - no! No it's not!” It was perhaps the most pathetic attempt at lying he'd ever made.

“Who else would it be?”

“You're not in love with any of us, are you?”

“And not with Axelia. Wouldn't say Axelia.”

“Mickey loves Minnie! Mickey loves Minnie!”

“You spend a lot of time with her, more her than us.”

“And she makes you happy happy happy.”

“You smiiile when you talk about her.” “And you talk about her a looot.”

Of all the times for them to actually pay attention to something! Mickey rubbed his face over and over, trying to find something to deny but they were right on the mark. The warm sensation in his chest never happened with any of the mermaids and nereids, nor with Axelia. As much as he enjoyed his time with all of them, spending time with Minnie was different. She engaged him, she wanted to learn, she was fascinated with everything he came up with. She valued his happiness and wanted to bring it to life day after day. Whenever she did speak about her life, it was only about the friends she made or who she adored and wished to help. She was sweet, and kind, and caring, and clever, and adorable, and oh no, he did love her, didn't he?

“Well,” Mickey said, but no argument came forth, the word running out of his mouth like a stalled motor puttering and broken, in a silly attempt to get his brain working. “Well. Well. Well. Well!” Eventually the word stopped sounding like a word and just sounded like babbling, which his girls copied in amusement. “Well, okay, so, maybe, maybe, just maybe, I luhhh. I luuuhhhh. I love her. A little bit. DON'T START CELEBRATING!” He knew that was coming and with his hand out, he put an end to it before it even began, several girls frozen in cheering poses. “The second question is much more important.”

“You want to know how to make her love you,” Calista guessed, and many nodded with her in agreement.

“Of course not.” Mickey's temper cooled – if he was in her shoes – well, scales – he'd have made the same assumption too. “A girl like that deserves better. And I don't wanna ruin the nice thing we have going. She's a great gal, a great friend. The sooner I stop luh-luuuh-having those feelings, the less awkward things gotta be.” The idea of Minnie loving him never crossed his mind. That'd be madness. A girl that fantastic and a reject weakling like him?

Even if she said there was nothing wrong with him. Even if she accepted all of him. Even if she cried over his past and had apparently devoted her life to his happiness. None of that meant she could love him. She was just being a very, very, VERY good friend. Of course. Obviously. Maybe she acted like that towards all her friends – although that idea made his stomach churn.

Andria raised her hand. “Think about all the stuff you don't love about her! Like how...” She trailed off, trying to find a negative point about Mickey's friend and unable to come up with one. Rare silence fell over the group as they all tried to come up with her faults and came up with nothing, save for wordless gestures and scratching of heads.

Yet Mickey thought it was a good idea. “No, that's good! That's good, Andria, good girl.” Andria beamed, even if she didn't understand. “See, you guys aren't with her as much as I am, she's got some bad stuff about her too. Like, sometimes when I'm working, she'll sit on the floor and lay her head on my lap and just watch me.”

Rydia squinted. “That doesn't sound bad at all.”

“Of course it's bad! When she does that, I can't concentrate at all! And then there's times, like, with the boat! She'll make me want to do something I don't like to do.”

Damara clicked her tongue. “Didn't you wind up liking that a whole lot? You told us you wanted to make an even better boat after seeing it.”

“Yeah, well, um, that's just more work for me!” Oh boy, he really did love Minnie, didn't he? Did he ever stand a chance? “Maybe this wasn't such a good idea after all.”

“I've got an idea, but it'll break a rule,” Lydia offered, swimming up to be closer to Mickey. “Is that okay?”

“Fine, but just this once.” He patted her head to reassure her she wouldn't be doing anything wrong.

With permission granted, Lydia gained more confidence, and began to clap her hands in her water, making big splashes. “Just pretend she's Aphrodite! You hate Aphrodite, so if you pretend Minnie is Aphrodite, you won't love her at all!”

“Hmmmm.” Mickey shifted around on the sandy shore, uncomfortable with the suggestion. “I don't know...Minnie's nothing like Aphrodite. She doesn't use her looks to get what she wants. She works hard, and she's smart! Not some air-headed beauty who just sits on Olympus and lets everyone tell her how nice she looks. Minnie's not like that. That's like comparing apples and oranges!”

“I like apples and oranges!”

“They're both very yummy.”

“Are we allowed to talk about Aphrodite now?”

“Poseidon told me she's getting married!”

Mickey sighed, shaking his head. He thought of reinforcing the rule, but the girls had clearly done their best to give him their honest opinion and help him out, so he let them rattle on with silly gossip for a little bit more. What was the harm?

“Is she? Who is she marrying?” “She's marrying Hephaestus.”

“Isn't Hephaestus Mickey's name?”

“Mickey's name is Mickey!”

The harm was being so stunned Mickey almost slid into the water. “Wait a minute, back up, back up!” he yelped, flailing his arms about. “Did you say Aphrodite is going to marry Hephaestus?!” He then jabbed a thumb at his chest to remind them that, yes, he was Hephaestus.

Tallia had been the one to hear the rumor, and as she leaned her head back in thought, she remembered that, oh yeah, he was Hephaestus, wasn't he? “Poseidon said that's what she said. She said she was in love with Hephaestus and she'd marry him. It made Queen Hera very, very mad. Are you going to marry Aphrodite? I thought you hated her.”

“Of – of course I'm not marrying her!” Mickey sputtered, a hand to his head as he tried to find some logic to this revelation. What in the world had happened up on the Mountain? Why would a goddess, the goddess of love and beauty, want to marry him? It made no sense – and then his anger returned, hard and hot, as he found the only reason she would do such a thing. “Why, she's just making fun of me! To her, I bet it's some big funny joke!”

Tallia tilted her head. “I don't get it.”

“She's mocking me! She must've learned about me, and thought it'd be a gag to say that the goddess of love is marrying the ugliest god! The goddess who everyone accepted right from the get-go, and the god who got thrown off when he was born! I bet she thinks that's rich!” Each word became hotter, a rabid snarl as he imagined some vapid beauty laughing cruelly at his life, eating it up with the other snobby gods and goddesses on Mount Olympus. Why not? His whole life was a joke. Well fine, what did he care? I don't need nobody and nobody needs me -

Ah. But. That wasn't true anymore, was it?

Mickey's growling stopped, replaced with somber silence. His tense muscles relaxed, his anger evaporating, and he glanced at his reflection in the water. But instead of seeing his face, he saw Minnie, sweet Minnie, who had held him and kissed his leg and would never leave him. She'd never do anything to hurt him.

“Minnie would never do that,” Mickey said quietly, watching Minnie's image vanish in a few ripples. “She's not like Aphrodite at all.”

Normally when Mickey's anger, or more specifically his sorrow in reaction to any form of pity, was at its highest it was impossible to calm him back down. He would rant and rave and return to his cave to vent out his aggression on his projects. Yet here and now, the girls saw that he managed to calm himself down all by himself just by thinking of Minnie. They'd already liked her because she was so pretty and because she was Mickey's friend, but this solidly sold her on them forever. If Minnie made Mickey happy, why, she was the best woman in the whole wide world.

“I like Minnie a whole lot,” Rydia said, and in short time was joined by the others.

“I do too. I want her to stay with Mickey forever.”

“I love Minnie lots.”

“Mickey and Minnie should get married!”

“I wanna go to Mickey's wedding!”

Mickey smiled, and moved to stroke the hair of whoever was closest, allowing them to speak of weddings and pretty dresses and all the other tangents that grew from it without interruption. He doubted he was going to get any better advice, and decided to leave it at that. In time, he'd get over his feelings for Minnie. Since they were both immortal, they had eternity to change, and Mickey was confident that one day he wouldn't feel any love for Minnie. How, he couldn't say. It wasn't as if he was going to get sick of her curious questions or the feel of her hand atop his own, definitely not anytime soon.

Minnie was good and sweet, and deserved any man she wanted. He mused that such a soul would be the luckiest man in existence. For now he was content to be with his family, engaging them in whatever drivel they were yammering on about – he topic of weddings had led to rings and now the mermaids wanted rings on their tails – and his heart didn't ache. Instead of dreading or planning for the future, he ultimately decided to just be happy with what he had.

Minnie's tiara would be ready soon.

~*~

Deep in the furthest depths of the Underworld lived three people Donald didn't enjoy visiting. He avoided them whenever possible, as they gave him the creeps whenever they had a conversation – and he was well aware of the irony of the Lord Of The Dead getting creeped out. The Sisters of Fate were the keepers of mortal life, spinning the threads of life and snipping them when it was time to die. On several occasions Donald had come to them, reluctantly pleading for a mortal's life to be extended due to sad circumstances. He hated being seen as a softie, even if Daisy found it charming. The Sisters tended to mock his sympathies, and regularly abused it to make him beg on his knees for what he wanted or demand luxurious gifts. They knew that no matter how harsh they were, Donald couldn't punish them. Who else knew how to thread mortal life?

They absolutely never reached out to him, which meant that today the Underworld must have frozen over, since that's what they did. Donald was working on his schedule, trying to figure out the best time for him to see the nephew he'd never visited. He wasn't confident he could do it alone, and Daisy assured him that she and Minnie would be there. Then there was the matter of what exactly to say to the boy – other than an extremely overdue apology – and how he should present himself. Should he be natural as he was, Donald? Or try to impress him as the Master of the Underworld, Hades? He was pacing about, writing on an endless scroll, his mind bouncing about.

Should he get on his hands and knees? Or just hug Mickey when he saw him? Should he get his nephew a gift? Maybe invite him to the Underworld to see what it was like? He was so lost in these thoughts he didn't see the thin yellow thread sliding its way towards his foot – but he certainly felt it wrap around his ankle, and in the second he looked down to see what was going on, it yanked him off his feet and speedily began to drag him away across the cave floor.

On the River Styx laid islands inhabited by spirits, and each spirit stopped what they were doing when they heard a deafening “WAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUGHHHHHHHHHH!” echo across the Underworld, followed by several expletives so harsh that elder ghosts covered their descendants' ears. To save whatever is left of Donald's dignity, there's no need to go into all the bumps, corners, jagged rocks and near drownings he endured as a result of his dragging. It ended in roughly five minutes as he entered the lair of the Sisters of Fate, his belly scratched and aching, and having poofed into his smoky form about six different times. The thread untied itself from his ankle and laid down, now as normal and lifeless as thread should be.

Donald took one look where he was. “YOU CAN'T JUST WALK OUT AND ASK FOR ME LIKE A NORMAL PERSON?!” Whereas most mortals would tremble and cry at his thunderous voice, the Sisters just scoffed in unison.

“Why should we ever have to leave our home?” asked Neraja, the Sister of the Past, and the youngest by seconds. All three were ducks with soft white feathers, but Neraja was not only the tallest, towering over her sisters and her own spinning wheel, she was also the most beautiful. She had raven night hair spilling down to her feet, and eyes equally dark and alluring. Her flowing silk dress so deeply red that it would have been easy to mistake it for blood, and her arms were coated in trinkets symbolizing the moon and planets. It was her duty to pull along the threads of life so mortals could be born, and even now her hands were effortlessly pulling forth threads in all of her fingers, birthing several mortals at once across the world.

“You should be honored we've called upon you,” declared Magica, the Sister of the Present, the middle child. She was a head shorter than Neraja, and the shortness also applied to hair that stopped at her shoulders, and a dress that cut off at her knees. Her outfit contained fading red and darkening purple, depending on how the candles in the cave were flickering. Her legs had ringlets of solid gold in perfectly shaped circles. It was her duty to keep the threads smooth during one's life, and cross and tie them over if certain lives were destined to meet and entwine. At the moment she was untangling a pair of lovers that had argued they should split up for good, and Magica was taking great enjoyment from it.

“It's deplorable that you show us such disrespect,” came with a snort from Garma, the Sister of the Future, the eldest of the siblings, and with all the wrinkles on her face, one might have thought she was older by centuries. She was the smallest of the three, with a hunched back and blue veins throbbing underneath her dry feathers, her fraying gray hair dyed yellow in a pathetic attempt to hide this. Her dress had become so dark and faded it was impossible to tell what it once was, especially given how tattered and ripped it was, though she wore each tear like a badge of honor. Sharp teeth jutted from her beak, even showing when her mouth was closed. It was her duty to cut the thread when a mortal's life was up, and out of all the sisters, she enjoyed her job the most. Her scissors cut the air even now, eager to sever a living person from their body of flesh.

By this time Donald had managed to poof back into his normal form, and once the make-up was off he stood to attention and crossed his arms. “There's no way you hags invited me here for a pleasant chit-chat, so what did you need me so badly for?”

The Sisters grumbled together, reluctant to come forward and admit there was a problem. Impatient Neraja straightened her back, sticking out her chest – ever since Donald had married, she had tried to tease and flirt with him, but he'd never taken the bait, which was a great wound to her pride. Even now he looked at her eyes and nowhere else. “There's something amiss with one of the threads.”

Donald blinked, looking at the millions of threads that laid on the floor, hung on the walls, roped the ceiling – it was impossible to know what the room really looked like, since everything was covered in different colored threads. He wasn't even sure if the Sisters had seats to sit on, or if the threads were so intricately wound and numerous that they could solidify and be sat upon. He never cared to ask. “How can you tell?”

Magica crossed her arms, glaring at Donald who glared back. “We've been at this since the first mortal was given life, we've never had this happen before!” She got out of her stone chair – oh, so they did have seats, Donald mused to himself – and strutted up to Donald, holding up a single white thread in his face. “Look at this!”

Donald looked at what he saw as a perfectly normal thread. If the Sisters said there was something wrong with it, then it had to be wrong, since they took pride in their work and hated being around Donald. He didn't want to come across as a fool by saying he couldn't see what the problem was, so he sucked on the inside of his cheek and squinted. With every passing second, the Sisters' eyes became harder, and he could feel himself shrinking. If only Daisy was here today, she'd give these women what for! Any insult they lobbed at her she could give back twice as hard. She wouldn't allow them to cut Donald down -

Cut? Donald blinked, and then reached over to touch the beginning of the thread – which indeed looked too perfect, too even, as if it'd been cut with a precise sharp object. “Say,” he finally spoke out loud, rubbing the end with his fingers. “Garma's only supposed to cut the end of it, right?”

“I didn't cut it at all!” Garma hissed, her old bones loudly clicking underneath her flesh, her elbows sticking out in angry flutters. “How dare you imply that I would! I have half a mind to come down there and cut off your beak!” Garma sat atop the highest seated platform, so she could look down upon her sisters. Magica's and Neraja's were evenly spaced and evenly sized, as they often teamed up to insult their elder, when they weren't insulting each other.

“The old biddy is right,” Neraja said while sliding a sleeve of her dress down her shoulder. Still no reaction, as Donald was studying the thread intensely. Peeved, she rolled it back up, deciding to stick to business, or at least what she saw as her business. “She knows her place. She'd never cut a thread before it's time.”

“Who are you calling an old biddy, you impetuous brat!”

“Don't tell me you're going deaf, you stupid shrew!”

If Magica had joined in, Donald would have been more than happy to put the whole weird matter behind and leave as fast as his feet could carry him. But Magica was even-minded, sometimes, and she managed to stay focused. “Neraja has no memory of spinning this thread! It happened many days ago, I was pulling along as usual, and that's when I found this abrupt beginning of life!”

“And only felt like telling me now, I see,” Donald muttered under his breath. No doubt the catty ducks had thought they could solve this issue on their own, and only “asked” for Donald's assistance when they realized they couldn't. He drew himself up, trying to figure it out, scratching his head with one finger. “So if I've got this right, instead of being born, this person just...suddenly...appeared out of nowhere and lived? Is that even possible?” It was a silly question because it couldn't be answered, but he had no clue how they thought he'd be of any use. “I guess I could try and look into it, but if it's just the once and it's done no harm, is it really that important?”

Neraja answered that first by throwing one of her sandals at his face. “Of course it's important! Creating life is MY job!”

“And if you don't figure this out,” Garma snarled, pointing her sharp scissors in Donald's direction, “We'll never do another favor for you for the rest of eternity! No matter how hard you beg!”

“Noted,” Donald sighed, rubbing the sore spot where the sandal had smacked. “Okay, fine, I'll look into it, but I can't make any promises. Can you tell me anything about this mystery person?”

Magica rubbed her fingers along the thread, her eyes momentarily reflecting the color of the thread, a marble white. “A young woman who lives with a sculptor...She knows nothing and must learn everything. She has been called a heroine in this humble village. At first she only wanted to please her man, but now she seeks to understand how the heart works.”

“Yeah, that's not a needle in a haystack at all,” Donald replied dryly, unimpressed by Magica's mystic mutterings. He managed to back up before she could kick him in the shin. “I said I'll do it already! But you have to keep your word too! As long as I'm making the effort, you still have to listen to my requests.”

Neraja cackled, tossing her hair over her shoulder. “Of course we'll still listen to your pathetic wails over mortal life! It's one of the highlights of our lives! Seeing the great and mighty Hades grovel like a dog...”

“...All for the life of an insignificant peon!” Garma finished, laughing and knocking her head back as she found it funnier and funnier. “The lord of the dead who doesn't want any dead!”

This time Magica did join in, curling the thread around her fingers as she sneered. “Never forget, we hold the real power here! You will always be beneath us!”

“Sure, whatever,” Donald smoothed down his robes, the insults having gotten pretty dull since he'd been hearing them for years. What were once daggers to his soul were now more like yippy Chihuahuas nibbling at his ankles. At times he wondered if they acted this way because they were lonely and wanted attention, even if it was poisonous, and so he was often the one feeling pity for them. Not that he'd ever tell them – they couldn't kill him, but they'd make him wish for it. If these miserable crones enjoyed being miserable, let them go at it. “I'll keep you updated.” Relieved that it was done, he headed for the circular exit of the cave.

“One more thing, Lord Hades,” Garma voice was low and dangerous as she glowered at him, and the others followed suit, lowering their heads and rubbing their hands together.

“Of course,” Donald groaned, and turned right back around. “What now?”

“We have seen a prophecy,” Garma announced, standing up tall, as did her siblings. “And it must be heard!” It wasn't often, but sometimes in the course of their duties, a spark would fly from the various threads, giving all three Sisters a vision of a possible future. It wasn't guaranteed, but whenever they had one, it had been ordered that Zeus was to be told immediately. They would tell Donald, who would tell Fethry, who would tell Zeus, who would then announce it to everyone else. It had been a rule established since the first prophecy prediction, which had said Zeus would overthrow his father, although later prophecies had never been so momentous.

Donald raised an eyebrow. “The last time you guys chucked out a big one, you said Zeus would be dethroned by a son. I don't see that happening anytime soon.” If what Daisy had told him was correct, Mickey was in no shape to overthrow anyone, nor had a desire to. Zeus probably had hundreds of sons and daughters out in the mortal and godly planes, but so far none of them wanted his seat either. Not all of their prophecies came true, but for a big one to fail like that – it didn't bode well for the rest.

“It could still happen,” Neraja defended, though her shoulders were slumping in defeat.

Magica ignored her and continued on from Garma. “In the near future, a great and bloody war will overtake the mortals! Thousands will perish, and the war will be endless! The Underworld will be flooded with the souls of the innocent! The will of Ares will bring about an end to mankind as we know it!” She drew up her hands, fingers twitching as if she was raining down souls from her fingernails.

Donald stared at all three of them, his temper threatening to rise, but he managed to stave it off. For a second. “You know, if I actually believed you, I would have suggested that you should have SAID THAT WHOLE THING FIRST BEFORE GOING ON ABOUT SOME STUPID THREAD!” Now it was he who towered over them in his form of deadly smog and glistening red eyes. “HAVE YOU BEEN HOLDING BACK ON ANYTHING ELSE?! OR DO YOU WITCHES JUST LIKE TORMENTING ME?!”

“Yep.”

“Absolutely.”

“Well, duh.”

Honestly, what kind of answer was he expecting? He scowled at them a moment longer before poofing back to normal, not bothering with his make-up or ponytail or any other additions his anger tended to give him. “Doggone stubborn little...” He stormed out of the cave, cursing his rotten luck that his job was saddled with those wretches. He would tell Fethry about the prophecy, but he sincerely didn't believe a word of it. The will of Ares? Puh-leeze! Pete was a lazy slob who preferred to watch people fight, and threw temper tantrums when people got along. Besides, Zeus, as lazy as he was, would surely prevent the “end of mankind”. He enjoyed the physical pleasures of it so much he'd never let it die out. Prophecies were merely one path out of millions. It was not a guarantee of anything.

With that in mind, Donald decided he wouldn't bring Mickey down and risk any chance of running into the Sisters. They didn't deserve a chance to meet his nephew, and he wouldn't subject Mickey to their sadistic whims. As his anger cooled, Donald reasoned that he should also find a way to thank Minnie for finding Mickey in the first place. He'd only met her once, but he found her charming and sweet. He wouldn't mind seeing her again, and much like Daisy, he found an urge to protect her from the things she was only just discovering.

He slowed his walk as he remembered that she too was an unusual discovery. It seemed like ages ago when all of the gods, goddesses and lower creatures were struck with that odd sensation, that “something was coming.” That “something” had been Minnie, and then everyone went on as normal without ever questioning where she'd come from. Much like the odd mortal thread, he supposed, which indicated a mortal merely popped into life. Maybe the two were connected somehow, though he was sure Minnie would have brought it up to Daisy if she'd known anything. The two were as close as actual loving sisters, as opposed to the hateful brew back in the cave. Seeing Daisy speak so happily of her friend was quite entertaining, and while Daisy would try to deny she felt that strongly, it was clear that Daisy adored Minnie and would do almost anything for her.

Still, that made two mysteries in one short leap of time. Instead of concerning themselves over one mortal, shouldn't everyone be more worried about one goddess? Mortals couldn't come from nothing, and neither could gods. Gods had to be born too. That was the only way.

…Well. There was one other way to create a god.

But the idea of Minnie being created in such a way was so ludicrous that Donald slapped his own head for even imagining the concept. What had he been thinking? He should be concentrating on Mickey first, then the thread, before thinking about the impossible. When nearby spirits asked what had happened, he told them it was nothing important and they accepted it at face value. Donald resumed his planning, and chose not to give Mickey a gift, since he didn't know Mickey well enough to know what he liked, and chose to merely be himself when they met. It took up all of his day.

Yet far, far back in the reaches of his mind, the idea of the other way lingered, and one day it would be visited again. Only a handful of gods knew about this method, and they had no reason to speak of it because it hadn't happened since the dawn of creation. There was no way it could have happened again.

But. But! But! The almighty word that lingered and created frightening yet fascinating possibilities.

But if she had been born that way, then Minnie had the potential to be more powerful than Zeus and Hera combined. She would have enough power to topple Mount Olympus and burn the world itself to ash and dust.

What Donald didn't know was this was also one of the possibilities and prophecies that the Sisters of Fate had seen. They'd deemed it so ridiculous that they didn't bother to speak of it. Yet it was still out there, along with infinite others on the horizon.

The day ended with no questions answered.

#disney #fanfic #love like lava #mickey mouse #donald duck

[beholdthemem]

Episode 1: Rollercoaster

All right, I said I was going to watch Phineas and Ferb in order since I can’t sleep, the store is closed until at least 6 AM, and I never have before. I don’t think I actually saw the first episode when it first came out, so I guess this should be interesting? It is 3:26 in the morning, I can’t feel my legs, and my brain is going a million miles an hour. Let’s do this.

....Any dialogue directly from the episode will be typed in bold, because I’m organized. So there.

Also the times.

1:00: Ahh, Bowling for Soup. I feel like I’m ten years old and life is still full of possibilities instead of endless crushing psychological horror.

1:14: Wait, they had actual children voicing the characters? I’m listening to Phineas speak, and that SOUNDS like a eleven year old- though, to be fair, an eleven year old with good voice acting skills. Good job.

1:43: Ferb is reading a book on what I can only assume is the history of apples. Bless his weird little heart.

2:06: “What if a... WHAT if a satellite falls out of orbit and crashes into the house??” Don’t SMILE while saying that, woman! No wonder she doesn’t leave you in charge much, geez. What’s wrong with you.

2:10: “Mom says I’m in charge conditionally!”           “Whatever.”

Huh. That is... slightly more attitude than I remember...

         “Wait a minute, what are you doing?”          “Homework.”

Did you just lie to her face? 

         “It’s SUMMER.”          “That’s cool. You wait till the last minute then.”

And there’s the attitude again! Damn kid, I remembered you being more mellow. Looks like school let out just in time, you need to chill.

2:22: “Well, I’m watching you. And I’m in charge! Conditionally!” Conditionally.

2:43: “No, I told you, I can’t I’m watching my brother and stepbrother.” EWKAY, It’s been a while since I’ve seen this show, but I’m pretty sure I remember BOTH boys- Ferb included- referring to you as ‘Our sister’, Candace. Ferb thinks of you as SISTER. NO STEP. That is COLD.

3:20: Isabella!

3:40: “Does your stepbrother ever talk?” Once per episode, I think.

         “I was going to the pool. You wanna go swimming?”          “Kinda in the middle of something here.”

You know, you could have just said no. Rude.

4:16: This must have been a weird moment when the show first came out. Also, lovely photo, Doof. Very nice.

5:00: “Seems like we’ve had this conversation before!” And you’ll have it again.

6:41: “Phineas and Ferb got a roller coaster?” You know them by name? How small is this town?

7:14: Phineas, how are you going to watch your brother at least TRY to make himself more presentable and then show up in the same t shirt and shorts? Get a vest or something, class things up. PRESENTATION, kid. SHOWMANSHIP.

7:34: That does not look structurally sound.

8:01: “You all signed the waivers, right?” WAS THERE REASON TO? YOU BUILT THIS THING!

8:13: “REALX, they’re just rubber!” This coaster does not need your sass, dude. Is this what you’re like during the school year? Sheesh.

8:27: The smile of what is either a future serial killer or a current adrenaline junkie. Maybe both.

8:48: YOU JUST STABBED HIM THROUGH THE FOOT WITH A SCREW?!

8:56: NOT COOL, PERRY THE PLATYPUS. NOT COOL.

9:16: Oh wow, they pulled a Gumball- or did Gumball pull a Phineas and Ferb? I don’t know. The realistic tinfoil looks very weird compared to the cartoon buildings.

9:20: ...Yeeeaaaah, the thing about tinfoil is that it’s not real strong.

9:25: IT’S EVEN WEIRDER AGAINST THE SKY

9:47: It’s weird seeing them BOTH in peril. 

10:15: Being Candace is hard sometimes.

10:37: Wait, are the kids still on that thing? Have they noticed they’re slightly higher up then they should be?

10: 41: Yes and no, apparently.

10:59: ....Is that the same construction site that almost killed Milo Murphy six years later?

11:12: “I worry about you sometimes, Candace.”

11:18: The Statue of Liberty?

11:20: Mount Rushmore?

11:28: Hi Jeremy

11:31: The EIFFEL TOWER? WHICH TRI STATES IS THIS AREA IN?! SOLID, LIQUID, GAS?

12:03: Aaaand there’s the photo-realism again. Creepy.

12:06: “We should have charged more.” YOU CHARGED THEM?

12:41: And Ferb says...

12:55: “Well, a brother is a brother- but I couldn’t have asked for a better one than Ferb.” DID YOU HEAR THAT CANDACE? HM?? A BROTHER. BRO-THER. NO STEP. OHANA MEANS FAMILY.

13:09: Maybe you should extinguish the burning rollercoaster car before it sets your tree on fire.

13: 14: Too LATE

13:20: Property values in this town must be nuts.

#phineas and ferb #two more hours till the store opens #actually wait #no yeah six AM

[drink-n-watch]

That title is really very tenuously related to the episode. I mean themes of love and longing and young men’s fancies and all but really it’s very different story in a completely different style and setting. I’m still using it as a title. I’ve always quite liked it and if I can encourage one person to read (or reread) some O’Henry today I will consider it a good deed.

O’Henry always makes me happy. We can all use some happy. OOOHhh, brain maelstrom! There should be a Slice of Life anime adapting O’Henry’s short stries. That would be so adorable! How do I make it happen?

Sorry guys, I got over excited there. That seems to happen a lot doesn’t it? I really like O’Henry. In fact, I really like a lot of authors. This sort of betrays my bias for this show.

And just as I predicted, Woodpecker Detective’s Office is proving to be frustrating. At least to me. A decent first episode followed by a very strong second, a so-so third and forgettable fourth and now, a very odd choice that’s likely to appeal to a super specific niche. Or maybe just to me! I think a lot of viewers would have found episode 5 of Woodpecker somewhat boring and I don’t blame them. I really liked it.

Are your seatbelts on? We’re about to take a real sharp left turn here. I’ve been rambling on abut things I like so why break the trend. I really like Sound Euphonium. There is an episode in the second season I believe which is  the orchestra competition. There’s a bit of build up a few scenes between the leads but really, almost all of the episode is dedicated to watching them play. over 1 minutes of unbroken classical music with accompanying animation of kids playing instruments. That’s it. No cut away no drifting into some dreamscape no cutting the piece off after the intro. I considered this spectacular. To me, it was an achievement that I wouldn’t have been able to find elsewhere.

This episode of Woodpecker Detective’s Office reminded me of that episode of Sound Euphonium! Yes there was a bit of strife between Kyosuke and Ishikawa (what else is new?), and sure there were funny and sad little interludes of love bursting about here and there. But these love stories with competing suitors or unrequited feelings were all just a framing device for the show to deliver what was essentially a classical Japanese poetry recital. And boy was I impressed.

I’m sort of picky with poetry and usually prefer it in French. Some of these pieces were beautiful other’s went above my head. I really likes Ishikawa’s quote of “The smell of paper in Western books always makes me hunger for money“.  I know I put quotation marks there but I’m actually paraphrasing. I tried to find where that quote was from (it is in quotes in the episode so I thin it’s from something. As you probably guessed I couldn’t retrace it.

Anyways, my point is not so much that the poetry was beautiful, some of it certainly was but poetry is a very personal ting. Just like music. What is great to m is that a whole production team got together and said to themselves, our viewers are going to appreciate an entire episode of classic poetry. These are viewers that are going to give something different a chance even if it isn’t full of action and artifice. This tells me two things. That the production has faith in the audience and that someone on the team really likes poetry. And I find both of these ideas completely charming.

Of course there was a poem about cats. Japanese literature has a lot of cats in it.

We did get some story out of the episode as well. Mainly it was a fairly lighthearted affair with most of the supporting authors pining over a server at the regular izakaya trying out poem each other for her affections. I particularly liked how Nomura innocently asked if the young woman’s feelings should be taken into consideration just to be ignored by the rest and have it come back to bite them.

We even got introduced to Bokusui Wakayama who is apparently the best when it comes to poems about alcohol. Of course I had to look it up and as he seems to have drank himself to death (a depressingly common fate for literary types) I figure there is some truth to it. I read a number of his poems and liked them quite a bit. This is the only one I could find that directly relates to drinking:

Some distance away thunder roars divinely yet here rainless – under crimson sunset clouds I keep heating sake alone

Sheesh, if yo thought the episode was way too full of poetry for your taste, I’m not making it any better am I?

Here are my general thoughts. I seem to like this series best when Kyosuke and Ishikawa are arguing. I’m not sure why. Also, although I in fact like Ishikawa a lot, I think the series benefits when it doesn’t focus on him too closely. Having other characters pursue their own stories helped balance things out. He is a bit too  specific a personality type to always be onscreen.

Also, although Kyosuke is presented as the straight man and the adult in the room most of the time. He is in fact a total drama queen and it’s pretty funny when you think about it. During these 5 episodes, he’s thrown some type of mild tantrum  in 4 of them. Granted, in that time his best friend almost framed him for murder but really what do you expect by picking someone like Ishikawa as a best friend.

The only actual crime happened (maybe) at the very end of the episode. We  didn’t get to see much but I thin it was a murder. From the few images there that’s what it looked like. Also it’s always murder in this show. Actually I should have just lead with that. It’s murder cause it’s always murder….

Well let’s see what they do next. Maybe a deeply offensive episode?

Woodpecker Detective’s Office Ep.5 – Springtime à la carte That title is really very tenuously related to the episode. I mean themes of love and longing and young men's fancies and all but really it's very different story in a completely different style and setting.

#anime #episodic #historical #Mystery #Woodpecker Detective&039;s Office

[giancarlonicoli]

25 Basic Life Skills That Should Be Taught in School (But Aren’t) 

Editor’s Note: I know lots of you are homeschool parents. But please accept before reading this article that many kids are sent to public schools for a wide variety of reasons. Please do not turn this into an argument about homeschooling vs. public schooling or an insult festival toward parents who send their kids to school. That’s not productive. Let’s talk about what is taught vs. what is missing. And also, keep in mind that school is the only chance that some children have to learn new ideas because their parents are either disinterested or close-minded. While most of us try to teach our children these excellent skills at home, many young people are not raised in households like ours. ~ Daisy

By Meadow Clark

Think of the vast amount of time that students spend in school. But what do they come away knowing? They are taught very few life skills, so are they really prepared for the real world?

Here’s one of the glaring problems with public school: it’s designed to waste time.

Like a Weeping Angel from Doctor Who, school can zap your life away. It wouldn’t be half bad if you were being taught something useful. Sure, reading and math are important, but the bulk of those things can be taught in much shorter periods of time than are being utilized right now. Plus, reading skills are deteriorating and math was swallowed by Common Core.

Ideally, there would be myriad forms of trustworthy education that could suit any personality. And ideally many of these skills would be taught by family and imparted by experienced people – but that’s getting harder to do.

So in the list below, think of what it would be like if schools were ideal and actually preparing people to live meaningful lives.

Without further ado, here are…

25 Life Skills That Should Be Taught In School (But Aren’t):

#1 Individual Thought

Instead of regurgitating what the teacher says and mirroring their peers, people need to think for themselves only. That means no groupthink. Most people think they are unique but are only parroting. That’s why you can figure out who they are from just two of their beliefs. A lot of people struggle with who they really are but can’t even have a thought of their own. Life shouldn’t be so monochromatic and Borg-like. Calling all real individuals.

#2 Personal Finance, Saving & Budgets

The credit card and personal finance industry should not be the ones teaching us about money. And while I think Dave Ramsey’s advice from Total Money Makeover to start an emergency fund is golden; I’d like to nominate The Index Card by Helaine Olen as the curriculum. It is by far the best, most objective personal finance advice I’ve ever gotten. Takes all the confusion away. The name is from the idea that everything you need to know about finance fits on an index card – and the book even comes with it!

#3 Health & Nutrition

No fad diets. Just self-care and nutrition. Food selection and important information about vitamins, minerals, and bio-compounds. I know they teach health in school but c’mon… And why not include gardening and food prep?

#4 Resiliency & Failing Gracefully

The world can be crushing enough, perhaps resiliency and tenacity can be emphasized instead of measuring students against failure. Failure is inevitable after all, so people should be shown how to fall and get back up again.

#5 The Art of Conversation

‘Sup! Hav U taken this class B4?

#6 Logic, Reasoning, and Public Discourse

Did you know that schools have been rapidly dropping Logic classes? It’s time to stop the Idiocracy from spreading and revive Logic! Also, it would be nice if public discourse didn’t amount to two people rabidly screaming at each other.

#7 Character

You can’t legislate morality, but young people are eager to learn character. Instead of burdening children with global warming responsibility and punishing them severely for breaking unspoken social justice mores – how about letting them have fun but fostering a sense of character. Show them they have personal control/responsibility and that there are real-world consequences for their actions. Relationship skills probably shouldn’t be taught by government-run schools but ultimately those come from a person’s character.

#8 Negotiation

In order to make it in the real world and provide for a family, negotiating is crucial. It means being firm, having a backbone and the willingness to exhibit some disagreeableness.

#9 Cooking from Scratch

It’s a seriously needed lost art! And it overlaps with health, budget and survival classes.

#10 Survival & First Aid

All forms of survival, prepping and first aid, including wilderness first aid, should be taught to everyone. Survival without tech and during disasters or live shooting events – all of it. Gardening, self-defense, and firearms overlap with this class, too. The Dangerous Book for Boys, The American Boys Handy Book,  The Field and Forest Handy Book: New Ideas for Out of Doors would be a great, fun start! Of course, The Organic Prepper makes a great curriculum – hi, homeschoolers!

#11 Speed Reading (But with Deep Comprehension)

Speed reading is not the same as skimming. Many people have been taught to skim haphazardly because of the Internet, new gadgets and pressure to multi-task. This study shows that skimming is actually not a great way to comprehend more. Speed reading removes “subvocalization” while reading, and it can be done while maintaining comprehension.

#12 Self-Defense

Both with and without firearms. It would include boundaries, situational awareness, and improvisation.

#13 Crash Course on How Government Works

People are told to go out and vote but a lot of them don’t even know much about the positions they are voting on. I wish School House Rock had kept up the government songs! “I’m just a bill…”

#14 Creativity

Our linear-thinking and tech-driven world is rapidly extinguishing right-brain thought, and that is a travesty. Our creative force needs to be ablaze at all times and should never be downgraded or snuffed out.

#15 Household & Basic Car Mechanic Repairs

Why are these skills not taught to everyone? Learn to be handy and be independent from others while putting thousands of savings toward paying down a house. A lot of people are afraid to try, but only because they weren’t taught and may be afraid to ask for help.

#16 Time Management, Focus, and Productivity

Multi-tasking is a proven fraud. In a world driven to distraction, the art of focus is priceless in the working world. Maximized time is a maximized life.

#17 How to Read Literature With Deeper Understanding

Let’s face it: high school makes a lot of people hate books. Something tells me that’s the real reason why 1984 is mandatory reading. Who actually remembers the deeper message later in life? Curriculum: The Well-Educated Mind by Susan Wise Bauer is a straight-forward, wonderful guide through the classical education most of us never got.

#18 Entrepreneurship, Career & Starting a Business in a Gig Economy

This is a crucial skill desperately needed in a changing job landscape. It could teach sales skills for all different personality types. And hey, wouldn’t it be great to cultivate what your passions are instead of being wedged into categories by those career assessments?

#19 Etiquette

Seriously. Make. This. A. Class.

#20 Social Skills

Social skills are different than etiquette and manners. It involves picking up on cues and tone, and knowing how to appropriately respond in different situations. There is dating etiquette and there is also dating social skills. These are just as important as having social awareness on the job.

#21 Study & Deep Research

Why do 12 years of school without first learning this key element?

#22 How to Selectively Make Real Friends

An elective class to win GOOD friends and influence people. Networking. Watching out for red flags in relationships. School is basically a big bullpen where you’re with the same people every day for 12 years. And they think homeschoolers aren’t “socialized”? Sheesh! Plus, social media gives the false impression of connection without much selectivity.

#23 Effective Communication & Writing

So apparently this is being taught now, but…is it really?

#24 Resume & Cover Letters

Firstly, a lot of people do not know how to craft these. And secondly, most of them are thrown into the trash or get lost in cyberspace. The soul-crushing job application process needs a serious makeover, but until that happens, people need to learn how to write an attention-grabbing human-voiced resume that gets that foot in the door.

#25 Understanding Credit Cards, Bills, Taxes, House/Car Purchases, Student Loans, Insurance

This is a much-needed course, unfortunately. This class would help students avoid predatory financial practices instead of being ushered right into them. Day 1: teacher cuts up all credit cards in a class demonstration.

Last but not least….a bonus that is only being sort of taught apparently?

GEOGRAPHY!

If people want to let their government charge trillions to lob bombs into another country, then by Jove, they’d better be able to point it out on a map… I’m being darkly facetious, but seriously, geography is important.

It may even drive a wanderlust to explore, and the government doesn’t want that. We were always at war with Eurasia!

What electives would you like to see taught in school?

I was tempted to put some other electives on the list like “Relationship Skills by Interviewing Elderly Couples” or “Why TV Sucks” but I realize that these fall outside the realm of objectivity and belong in class #1: Individual Thought.

Would you like it if schools taught some of the skills above? Which ones are your favorites? Did I leave any important skills out of the mix? Leave your nominations below!