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#she already knows i dont know how to take care of myself and that i work as a nurse in a city during a pandemic so. she doesnt need more
toastsnaffler · 5 months
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in a hilarious turn of events my flatmate didn't even know I use any pronouns....
#i thought when she was talking abt how her parents thought i was gonna come out as trans and kept checking my name/pronouns-#that the joke was that im ALREADY trans but in ways they dont know abt.... but nope she genuinely didnt know 🤭#to be fair. i dont rly let anyone in on my gender business unless we're close enough to be dating or its an anonymous online space#like im legally cis and thats fine. idc abt ppl using my name + she/her bc thats not my gender identity its just AN identity that i use-#to navigate the world without ppl being fucking nosy bc i pass as + am sociopolitically treated as a woman (if butch lol)#to ppl who are friends ill joke that my gender is dyke (true) and to friends whose gender falls on a similar spectrum-#or who are transmasc ill talk a little more honestly abt it bc theyre usually able to understand better than anyone else#other butch dykes w a weird gender going on are the only motherfuckers who actually Get It but theyre hard to come by tbh#to be frank i dont fucking know whats going on w my gender. and i dont rly care enough to do the introspection to figure it out rn#i have so many other problems in my life and im lucky that most of my beef w gender can be solved by presenting butch + binding#and using any pronouns around other queer ppl. its actually incredibly funny to me when ppl she/her me bc its like tch. this chump hasnt#unlocked my level of gender yet. pronouns and names in general are so far disconnected from the way i exist in the world...#its just smth thats fun for me to play around with + makes me feel weird sometimes but in ways i havent distilled yet yknow#and this has been my approach to gender for like?? 4-5 years now??? and likely will continue to be for a long while..#anyway. its not actually that surprising my flatmate doesnt know bc shes cis so ive never felt compelled to have a deeper conversation#abt gender with her. but also i could sweeaaar its been mentioned bc almost all our other friends are trans lol#and also ive been introducing myself at queer sports socials w any pronouns and i swear i talked abt that w her..... whatever#and my pronouns are on discord and shes def seen my tumblr before but maybe i didnt have them in my bio at the time... i digress#i kind of prefer cis ppl she/hering me tbh. theyre not able to they them or he him or whatever else me in a way that matters.....#altho i do find it fascinating when she or other ppl elect to use neutral or masculine terms for me. raising an eyebrow and taking notes#like when she got a job and joked abt me being her househusband.. pulling up the fem/masc tally chart and chalking a line up#a la nona the ninth.... ive been trying to figure out whos inhabiting this body my entire fucking life with no luck girl#ANYWAY just smth to think abt. im so tired i think my brain is gonna start seeping out my eyeballs#im gonna watch some more pluto and read and then -> 🛌#another 6:30 start tomorrow woohoo#.diaries#zzzzz
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slippery-minghus · 7 months
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...
#really struggling with treating myself with any sort of respect right now. let alone the gentle care of my bedtime routine#i thought about putting myself to bed without my adaptive devices so i'd intentionally get a bad night's sleep but it isn't worth it#lmao and i've slept so badly the past two nights anyway i doubt tonight will be different#i really wanted to go dig out a razor but the marks from a month ago are still really obvious and it's gonna be hard enough hiding those#on my stupid fucking trip next week that i DONT want to go on#i'd so much rather spend those two weeks at home sleeping off burnout#but it's a stupid fucking Once In A Lifetime trip that has been something we've wanted to do for a fucking decade#and now that we're both real adults we can finally go but I DONT WANNA#i don't wanna be away from home that long!!! and miss the colors change outside my window!!!#and i don't wanna be away from maple!!! and i don't want my mom in my apartment stinking it up even though she's the best catsitting option#i don't want the disruption to my routine especially after how hellish work has been and how wrecked my routine already is#i dont wanna go spend two weeks so far away from home i can't even take my damn meds with me#and i cant fucking SIT WITH the hurt that the thing i FUCKED UP ON means *i* can't bring my fucking adderall EITHER#i don't even fucking know if A relies on taking it as much as i do#but i can only fucking feel the shame of letting them down!!!#i can't look past it and even begin to feel how MUCH I HATE MYSELF FOR LETTING *MYSELF* DOWN#BECAUSE I FUCKED UP#i just wanna sleep. forever.#i'm just gonna go away#personal#self harm tw
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indycar-series · 2 years
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rant in the tags
#tw depression#i feel like i do this song and dance every two months or so#but im once again at the point that im considering admitting myself to a mental hospital#i literally can't take care of myself and i have no energy or motivation to do so#the house is a mess and my roommate is basically the only one doing anything around here#except for taking care of her cat. i do that.#and i raced this weekend with my friends and i felt so useless the whole time#like he was airborne in turn 3 at irp and when we got the car back in our pit box i basically just couldn't do anything#like yeah there were already 3 people examining the car#i felt like i was more in the way tho than anything#i just stood there holding the deformed tire and trying to figure out what was going on#and sure it was my first time really doing anything racing wise but still i should have been able to do more#i dont have an appointment with my therapist for another three weeks and i don't want to text her this late at night#and while my parents know my mental state is super fragile right now my mom didn't help#she just showed me this church sermon about how i should be proud to be me#like 1. why would you show me that 2. why did you show me that when i told you i was going back to ohio right then#and my dad stressed me out yesterday after i was already in a pissy mood after the brickyard but he bought me lunch bc he felt bad#i feel like mental health wise he's the only one i can talk to but i don't want him to call me right now#and he's been trying hard to keep me out of a mental hospital#even once i came clean and told him what a piss poor job i've been doing at taking care of myself#so i dont know what will happen if i tell him this time#on top of all this im dealing with some serious body dysmorphia that came up after my therapist asked if i was considering top surgery#like yes but only slightly#and now i'm having a full blown identity crisis#so yay... fun times for me i guess#i honestly should probably text my dad instead of venting but i also don't want him to drop everything and come out here#that would make me feel 100 times worse at the moment#i dont even feel anything at this point#just numb. tired. exhausted. drained.#enough ranting for now i think
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ri-a-rose · 2 years
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So my little sister got engaged which I'm happy about and definitely not a tiny bit jealous
#she and her boyfriend have been dating for a couple of years so its exciting that he proposed#and like this is so selfish and petty but im jealous bc like im the oldest and it just idk#i feel like shes exceeding which is fine thats great im gglad for her that she has more ambition than me#but i just idk my cousin just got married and now my sister and i just feel lonely#she and b are gonna be high school sweethearts and ive literally never had a man look at me with interest#its petty af but both my sisters are prettier than me and have aspirations and goals and i just go to work and complain about shit#and the weddings not til may and my parents are already starting planning or whatever and#im a lump like im not going anywhere in life like have the dumbest goals#buy a house near my parents place so i visit them more often bc i cant take care of myself like a normal human person#im disabled but not really bc i can do things but only the bare minimum so my quality of life is not great unless my mom helps me with#cleaning and food bc im just really dumb and feel like a burden i mean m is in college with a good job and now engaged and j has plans and#a scholarship and will be working lots#meanwhile i complain about having to work 8 hours a day bc i used to work 4 hours and thats much nicer to my body like i didnt realise how#fucking lazy i am til i have to work more than 4 hours not really disabled just lazy and i complain to them about having to work i dont#know why they put up with my dumb ass i mean fuck its not hard to figure out why guys arent interested in me#i mean i want a person someone to like spend life with i yearn to love and be loved#theyre so cute doing lame cute couple things it makes my heart hurt#im done im done venting sorry#tbd#vent
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the-kipsabian · 2 months
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i should be writing and instead i just spent a good while reading through some of my old lynn fics cause someones been leaving kudos on them on ao3 and now i miss her and sami so much good lord
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echo-s-land · 1 year
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Relating to the "eldest daughter syndrome" while not being the eldest is something
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klovesyall · 1 month
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Oh my. My brain is full of ideas, but I can't write.
Spencer, but it's his first time showering with his gf? Either she casually invites him to join her, or maybe she's also a member of the BAU and was injured and needs some assistance?
AN: oh absolutely hun. I wasn’t sure if you wanted nsfw or fluff so I went with fluff for a safe option. Also I’m so sorry if this lowkey sucks. This is definitely my first rodeo with writing and I know it’s not perfect but I hope you kinda like it?
OK MORE RECENT AN: im sooooooooooooooooooooooo sorry this took so long. I don’t even have an excuse. And I’m so sorry because this is ASS. But I feel bad not giving you anything so here you go
Warnings: Fluff, swearing? , talk of nakedness and stuff idk
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Spencer had been extra protective of you ever since you got hurt. He didn’t want you to lift a single finger, even though you were perfectly capable. He made you food , carried your bags, hell- he even offered to carry you if your crutches got too annoying. All of this to say , he was willing to do anything to make you comfortable.
“Spence, I’m gonna take a shower.” You say with your back turned as you grab some pajamas out of the dresser drawer.
“What?” His voice was filled with concern, as it often was. When you turned around toward him he had the same amount of concern written on his face
“I have to shower Spencer, my hair is so dirty it looks wet.” You haven’t washed your hair in a few days, relying on dry shampoo and braided hair to get you by.
Spencer was thinking for a moment , you could tell by the way his brow furrowed slightly. He finally answers “Let me help you.”
You were slightly taken aback by his response. Spencer wasn’t usually confident enough to initiate or out right suggest anything intimate. And taking a shower together was definitely intimate. Not to say you were opposed to the idea though
“Are You Sure Spence? You do know I shower naked right?” Your tone was some what joking but also kind of not. Regardless you hear the little chuckle you love so much
“Yes I know. I dont want you to fall and get hurt any more than you already are. If you don’t want me to thats fine I just-“
You cut him off
“That would be really helpful, thank you.”
You see Spencer’s worry ease from his face and it’s replaced with a little curve of his lip
You give him a little smile before returning to grabbing your pajamas and walking to the bathroom. Spencer graciously follows you inside, locking the door behind him. When you turn to the counter , Spencer is quick to slip past you, turning on the shower for you.
“Do you take your showers warm or hot.” Spencer asks as if it’s so incredibly normal
“Uh hot I guess? It’s ok I can-“
He stops you when you begin to walk over
“Let me Take Care of you. Please.”
You sigh “you know I can do it myself.”
Spencer takes a step toward you, placing his hands on either side of your shoulders
“I know, but I don’t want to risk anything. You do so much for me and you deserve to be helped as well, especially when your injured. So please let me do this for you.” His voice is soft but you can tell how strongly he feels about this
“Ok, I’ll let you handle it.” I say
He smiles “can I take your clothes off?”
I Nod “You don’t have to ask.” You said that a lot, and it didn’t matter how many times you did. Spencer always asked
He grabbed the bottom of your shirt and you raised your arms. He pulls the shirt off your body and folds it before placing it on the counter. He does the same with your pants. Your standing only in your underwear now
“Do you want me to do the rest?” You ask
He shakes his head “turn around for me.”
You turn so your back is facing him and he unclasps your bra, sliding it down your arms until it hits the floor. He hooks a finger under your underwear on either side of you, pulling them down and helping you step out of them. He smiles when he meets your eyes again
“See something you like pretty boy?” You raise an eye brow in a teasing manner.
“Always.” He replies before walking you over to the shower. Holding his hand, you slowly take a step inside until your under the water. Once inside , Spencer takes a step back and sheds his clothes as well before joining you in the shower.
Spencer had ensured that you had a shower bench installed into the bathroom you shared when you moved in together. He said it was for safety reasons but, you still wondered if it might be for other things.
“Sit.” Spencer says, leading you to the bench.
When you sit down he detaches the shower head and wets your hair. When it’s what he considers wet enough, he lathers shampoo into his hands and begins to massage it into your scalp.
This man has very capable hands, many uses. And washing your hair just got added to the list of them. You close your eyes from a moment letting out a contended sigh
“Feel good sweetheart?” Spencer asks gently
“Mhm, definitely.” You reply, barely opening your eyes.
Spencer rinses out the shampoo and conditions your hair. He helps you wash off and when you finally stand , you wrap your arms around his neck. His hands lace around your waist
“Thank you Spencer, you’re an angel.” You say pressing little kisses to his jaw. You can see the blush creeping on Spencer’s face.
“You’re welcome, I’m always happy to help you.” He says peering down at you.
The two of you exit the shower. Wrapping towels around your selves and getting dressed- well Spencer refuses to let you dress your self so he helps you. He even blow drys your hair for you because he knows you don’t like going to bed with it wet.
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You lay in bed on your side facing him as he looks back at you. You reach out and brush a strand of his hair out of his eyes.
“You should stay home tomorrow.” Spencer says breaking the silence.
“Absolutely not. I’m perfectly capable of going into work. Plus Hotch would have my head if I didn’t go.” You say and Spencer sighs
“I don’t like the idea of you out on the field” he says once again with concern
“You’ll be with me. I’ll be fine.”
He sits up “I don’t want you to be fine I want you to be healthy.”
You sit up and scoot close to him “Spencer I’m going to work. If it makes you feel better I’ll stay back with Penelope and help her.”
Spencer relaxes a little “yea. Ok that makes me feel better. But don’t go doing anything stupid. That means no trying to entertain Penelope with” Spencer throws up air quotes “crutch tricks”
You groan and lay back down “whatever you say.”
You can hear Spencer’s little laugh as he turns off the lamp.
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gentlyweeps-world · 5 months
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Ferrari Red .2
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summary: Tensions run high between the beloved Ferrari boy and his girlfriend after a complicated Austin GP. Pictures and rumors surface, catching the eye of Y/n.
pairing: charles leclerc x fem! reader
warnings: angst, Ferrari boys red flags, alcohol consumption, toxic actions, throwing up
next part
LIGHTS OUT AND AWAY WE GO
Slowly waking up, you let out a soft sigh, memories of the night flowing back. You sit up and glance around your friends apartment, seeing a note left on the kitchen island. 
Moving slowly up and off the couch you read the note, which simply states that you can stay as long as you want and that shes sorry for what happened.
With a shaky sigh you wipe the already falling tears off your face, the same confusion and hurt consuming you. 
You grab a cup of water and drink some, hoping the water will calm your nerves. But a knock at the door has the glass shattering to the floor.
The door swings open and shows a dishevlled looking Charles with your favorite flowers and takeout. 
“Are you okay cheri?” He asks worriedly, moving into your friends apartment and closing the door behind him. He moves over towards your shaking body, setting the gifts he brought on the kitchen island, placing one hand on your arm he gently moves you away from the kitchen and into his arms, cautious of the glass and water on the ground. 
“Cheri are you okay?” He asks, his tone so soft and delicate manages to break you out of your silence. Shoving him away and out of your grasp breaks your heart but the rage you felt was more. 
“Dont call me that!” You shout out, tears forming in your eyes once more. “Please Y/n…cheri..you have to listen to me..” Charles begs out, moving closer to you as he wraps his arms around you once more, instead of moving away you simply just cry into his chest, sobbing as you softly punch his chest. 
“Why did you do that? Was I not enough? I dont understand Charles…why did you do that to me…to us Charlie” You sob out, still hitting his chest softly in frustration and confusion. 
Charles doesnt do anything, he squeezes you to his chest, not caring if you hit him or not. “I was missing you cheri, I needed you and couldnt have you..” He whispers out, his voice breaking at the sight of his love in so much pain because of him. 
“Then why didnt you call me? Or text me back?” You shout out, finally coming to your senses and shoving him away. 
“I..I dont know” He mumbles out, “I was upset, and I drank, I wasnt myself cheri you have to understand that…” He says, reaching out to you, but instead you move away from him. 
“And she..she came to me, she had a smile exactly like yours Y/n, I was only thinking of you…I needed you and she filled that space, I love you cheri…” He says, voice breaking as tears spill. 
“Go back to the apartment Charles…I- I need time..” You say, finally looking him in his eyes. 
It broke you, his eyes bloodshot, hair a mess, nose red from crying. “Please cheri I cant lose you….I cant..” He begs out once more, voice cracking and eyes wide. “Give me time” You state again, voice stern to put the point across. 
With a nod and a one sided hug he leaves, going back to your shared apartment like you had asked. 
After cleaning up the shattered glass and water, you eat the takeout Charles had gotten you, not that upset to ignore the free food right infront of you. 
Some time passes and your friend is finally back from work, “Let me guess you spent the time scrolling on your phone, watching Disney movies and sulking?” Sadie, your friend, says as she closes the door to her apartment.
“How did you guess?” You say groggily, rolling your eyes as you flip her off from the couch. “Okay first of all none of that please, also get yourself all dolled up! You are going out for revenge tonight!” Sadie says with a smirk and glint in her eye, one you reconginze very well. With a groan and sigh you slowly get up off the couch, forcing yourself to take a shower, do your makeup and hair. 
Thankfully you had kept a few dresses at Sadies apartment, and she picked the one that you both knew Charles would love. 
“Dude you look so hot!” Sadie squeals out after you walked out into the living room in your black dress, hair and makeup completed. “Thanks, you look good too, cute top” You say with a soft smile, Sadie pairing a risky top with some pants. 
Sadie gives you a reassuring smile, knowing you still feel upset. “Lets just go out and try to have some fun, yeah?” Sadie says, linking her arm with you, leading the two of you out of her apartment and onto the streets of Monaco. 
“Wait..did you tell Charles I was with you?” You ask as you and Sadie walk side by side, you glance over to her, and see a grin on her face, giving you the answer you were looking for. 
Instagram
@youruser
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liked by charles_leclerc and others
y/n: dressing for revenge
view all 1,295 comments
francisca.cgomes gorgeous gorgeous girl 😍
y/n all you kika 🫶
charles_leclerc 😍😍❤️
user why is he still liking her posts???
user23 he's probably in denial
user198 team y/n 4 life
user2330 honestly she probably deserved it
lilymhe I have such a beautiful girlfriend
y/n thank you love 🫶
alex_albon I'm literally right next to you lily
carmenmmundt 💛💛💛
sadie.collins LOVE LOVE LOVE
y/n ♥️♥️
You scoff to yourself, turning off your phone after scrolling through more of the comments from the post Sadie made off your phone.
You look around the club Sadie wanted to go to, it wasn’t all that bad, fun lighting, a nice bar and areas to sit.
Which was what you were doing, sulking off in a corner, sitting in a booth as you nurse your gin-tonic.
You would be having fun if Charles was with you, but he wasn’t. Letting out one more sigh you rub a hand over your face. Taking a deep breath, you finish off the rest of your drink and search for Sadie amongst the rest of the people in the club.
You find her near the bar, flirting up some random guys for drinks. Placing a hand against her back you give her a soft smile, averting eyes from the two guys she was talking to.
“Oh perfect! Adam, Lucas, this is Y/n my friend I was talking about!” Sadie says with a smile, handing you a shot of vodka.
“Oh aren’t you that Ferrari drivers girlfriend?” Lucas, you assume, asks. He’s tall, dark hair, tanned skin with dark eyes. You roll your eyes at his question.
Taking the shot down you hold back the grimace, “Not at the moment, no” You finally reply back with a smirk.
Knowing you caught the attention of him after he looks you up and down, handing you another shot, he wraps his arm around your waist, making you want to throw up.
“Let’s go party then” He whispers into your ear with a grin, which causes you to hold back a grimace.
You let out another groan, clutching your stomach as you vomit more into the toilet, Sadie holding back your hair as the pounding music from the club drowns out your gagging.
Feeling yourself sober up you move up off of the ground, groaning again as you flush the toilet. "You all good now?" Sadie asks, unlatching the door to the bathroom stall and moving to wash her hands and check her makeup in the mirror.
"Yeah..yeah, I'll be okay" You respond, rising off your hands and touching up your makeup. Leaning down into the sink you rinse out your mouth too.
You hear Sadie mumble out something with hot guys and drinks, then before you know it you're alone in the bathroom.
With a sigh you lean against the sink, checking Instagram you could feel the throw up come back once again.
Instagram
sadie.collins story
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charles_leclerc replied to the story
charles_leclerc who the hell is that guy on Y/n?
sadie.collins now you know how she feels
charles_leclerc when I get there she better be far away from him
You quickly refresh Instagram, checking if this was real or you were dreaming. Thankfully Sadie had deleted it off of her story.
Then you check Twitter, letting out a sigh as it looks like no one had seen it, or at least posted about it.
Sadie rushes into the bathroom and grabs your arm, yanking you out of the room and back into the club, rushing through the people.
“We have to go” She says, her eyes traveling around the club rapidly.
“Why-“ You ask, trying to keep up with her, but then you finally realized why, or more so saw why.
Charles Leclerc was standing only four feet in-front of you with a look of pure rage on his face.
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radio: Hope the second part was a good read, it took me all day to finish it!! Hopefully start working on the third part when I have the time 💙💙 !! This was not proof-read !! (please leave any thoughts, feedback and comments!)
taglist: @distancedss @janeholt3 @dessxoxsworld @lightdragonrayne @glitterf1 @bansheelydiia @kiarahblack @meadhbhcavanagh @cmleitora
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anonymouscheeses · 3 months
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Obvious shit I noticed part 3 (spoilers for welcome to heaven)
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Look at her! "Teehee"
Also she's nervous! Foreshadowing omg 🤯
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STICKERS! Two pride stickers and a cute donut. Gives me an idea to draw Chaggie at a donut shop while everything is burning down <3 (I'll probably do it but if any artist wants to as well go ahead!)
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*CHOKES ON COFFEE* I LOVE THEM. I'M SORRY I GET SO GIDDY WHEN THEY HAVE EVEN THE SMALLEST INTERACTION BUT UGHHH I NEED MORE, IT WILL NEVER BE ENOUGH 🙏🙏
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KISSY! MWA! *SCREAMS INTO THE VOID*
Vivzie give me more, moar now. MOAR
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DAMN. SHE CAN THROW- or maybe it just exaggerates the perspective in this frame but still- ZAMNNN
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Cherri x Sir Pentious fans RISE UP.
I wasn't ever really a fan of it myself but I always thought it was CUTE. Like 3 seconds before this part I was already begging for them to kiss 😭
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More foreshadowing!
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AAAAAA CREEPY BIRD THINGS!!!
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Oh wait- Sera's hot and Emily's already adorable
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If heaven don't look like what this is in the show, I DONT WANT IT! (THATS A JOKE PLEASE DON'T SMITE ME)
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JEALOUS GIRLFRIEND VAGGIE!! Can I just say how much I love Vaggie's face expressions? Not just here but like all the time. She's just made to be so exaggerated, out of all of them I thought it would be Charlie who would have the most dramatic faces but Vaggie wins it for me. I JUST GIGGLE SO HARD WHEN SHE LOOKS LIKE THIS BAHAHAH
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Okay yeah. It's very obvious now. Vaggie is definitely an ex-exterminator. They don't close in on Charlie here so it's made to subtly nudge the attention to Vaggie. HOW DID THEY IMMEDIATELY NOTICE IT WAS HER THO??
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Hot-
That's it.
SHARE THAT MOTHUSSY GIRL-
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YOU'RE TELLING ME SHE GREW OUT ALL OF THAT HAIR?!? YEAH ITS BEEN A LONG TIME SINCE THEN BUT STILL AJJSJD.
But overall the design is pretty meh. I always loved the idea of short hair Vaggie and even have seen art of it but it's just yknow, alright. Reminds me of Cassandra from Tangled: the series. IM LISTENING TO ONE OF THE SONGS RIGHT NOW HELPPP
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THIS SCENE HERE! WOOOOO! SO GLAD WE KNOW WHEN AND WHERE THEY FIRST MET!! Wish we got it extended tho. And also probably push it to next episode so it would have a better impact(atleast I think thats when they'll have the duet). BUT WHATEVER SOMETHING IS BETTER THAN NOTHING! or uh whatever
Vaggie must've been a bit terrified at first. The only sinner she ever sent mercy to was a child. Then to see someone who to her is an adult sinner who just looks really human, that must be crazy. BUT THEN IF SHE WAS TOLD THAT CHARLIE WAS ACTUALLY THE PRINCESS OF HELL? HOOOO, LOCK IN AND STEAL HER. THAT'S SOME WATTPAD SHIT. Also, I wonder how long Charlie thought of redeeming sinners. It would make sense to be after meeting Vaggie, since it could have been a wake up call to the fact not all sinners are bad people. Even though Vaggie isn't a sinner technically, Charlie didn't know that at the time. But maybe Charlie was always like this but just needed to meet someone who could start her dream with her. Long rant uhhh
Haha penis 🫵
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SCRAP WHATEVER I SAID IN THE FIRST PART. THEY PROBABLY DO FUCK- OR DONT?? I DONT KNOW- ANYWAY LESBIAN SEX (BOTTOM TEXT). WHY DO I CARE SO MUCH??? SOMEONE PULL THE TRIGGER.
Lute looks like a basic asf anime gorl. Adam doesn't ever take his helmet off, or maybe he just can't. OH HE'S DOING THE GAY SIGN 💅💅 Very appropriate for what he's saying
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Mentor, apprentice. I love that Husk is just trying to help Angel grow but isn't going to force him into it if he doesn't want to.
Im not a fan of huskerdust and think they'd be better friends as I can't imagine a relationship with them at all. But it's still nice and they are supportive of eachother so that's like- yknow. Basic rules. Or something like that. (HELP. I ruined it all at the last part)
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I- girl- WHY IS SHE GROWLING?? GRR GRR RR (INSERT TWILIGHT SAGA HERE)
VAGGIE'S FACE. SENDS ME. WHO GAVE HER THESE OVERDRAMATIC EXPRESSIONS, I APPLAUD YOU RGAGAGA
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Ooo... I didnt like this part at all... Instead of making the choice she just runs off. Then because the plot demands it, Adam says nothing. Kinda whish she atleast avoided the question, maybe in some way that would require actual thinking? For a character like Vaggie, she could choose either way and it feel like it's still her. If she chose to protect Charlie's dream, she would still be perfectly loyal to her but in the act of so would reveal a secret that could harm their relationship(which does happen at the end but that's because the plot wanted it like that). If she chose to side with Adam, she'd be hurting Charlie emotionally, sure, but it would keep a secret that could make Charlie see Vaggie less than who she is to her already(atleast what Vaggie might think would happen). Imo it should've been her deciding to protect Charlie, since it would mean she's devoted to her at all times.
ANOTHER THING! IF SHE COULDN'T MAKE THE CHOICE, THAT IS SOMETHING INTERESTING TO GO INTO. Maybe it could go deeper into how Vaggie doesn't know who she is without Charlie. So when she has a choice to make, like here, she can't do it without feeling the need to ask Charlie. BUT NOOO, YA HAD TO GO WITH THIS!! Wow. That was a long ass rant. Wtf 😭
Maybe I'm a dumbass. Maybe they'll talk about that next episode, but still, atleast touch on it a bit to not seem rushed?
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Angel looking out for his kids like a mom. We always did need the motherly figure, the one closest to that being Charlie but girl needs a mother in her life too(damn, wait, I did her so dirty).
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Huh, so why does it work here then? 🤨🤨 if it was said in the contract that Valentino can do whatever he wants only in the studio, then why is this the exception? 🤨🤨
Yes I'm stupid. Why do you ask? (No genuinely what's happening here)
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OH ITS THE IMAGE! I really like Sera so far, hope we get more of her soon or in season 2.
Now that we know the context of this, yeah, that's fucking insane. And badass. WOMEN.
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HMM. THATS STRANGE. DID YOU NOT FOR ONCE THINK THERE COULD BE A POSSIBILITY SHE MIGHT HAVE BEEN AN ANGEL? Okay I probably wouldn't either but I have an excuse, I'm an idiot. Some girl with a standing out outfit, with one eye, looks unusually human, right after/during the extermination... that's pretty solid ass proof. But I'm dumb so don't take anything i say seriously :D
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Imagine this. No- shit. Just-
JUST LOOK! THEY ARE SO CUTE! EVEN THOUGH CRAZY SHIT IS HAPPENING.
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*SWEATS*
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Vaggie is DESPERATE. PLEADING. That's obvious yeah, but don't mind me I had nothing to say for the last 3 images I just thought they were cool
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I mean. Slay I guess. 😍💅
Do all the exterminators look similar or is it just Lute and Vaggie? 🤨
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Even though Vaggie and Charlie may be going through this horrible thing with a hard punch in the gut, but Vaggie is always going to comfort her and I just think that's so adorable.
Also Adam looks like a chicken hah.
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Everyone fears to be like Lucifer. If they don't do bad things they believe are for the greater good and make sacrifices that put them higher than those in hell, they could themselves be fallen. It's really interesting but I don't know if it's going to be fleshed out enough with the amount of episodes left. Which also worries me about everything else that still hasn't be concluded. There's gonna be loose strings I just know it. Hopefully though they rather do that then rush everything out y'know?
I want the next episode to be mostly focused on Vaggie and Charlie's relationship and the healing of what happened. Not for the entire episode of course, it would feel drawn out if it did, but atleast address the problem for the first like I would say 10 minutes? Then the rest would focus on one or two loose threads while also having Vaggie and Charlie acting upon moving on. That's just my idea but yeah-
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confusedsiewmai · 2 years
Text
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#i dont know how to explain to my friends that i cried when they helped me while i was sick and vomiting because its everything i wanted#i told them its because (acc to my therapist) i cry upon feeling my belief system that im undeserving of help is threatened#which is why i cried the previous time i felt protected by my friends in a pretty confusing situation#but i didnt tell them how lonely i felt all the previous times i was sick at home#because i literally had to take care of myself so much#i told my dad to turn down the volume of his music because i felt like puking. and he did. but then he didnt bother with me#the next day he said he hadnt even realised i was feeling sick#i told my mother i needed help because i was feeling sick and she said she'll come in a minute#and then i waited 1-2 hours before she arrived and by then I had already puked into a plastic bag#after which she left me alone quite quickly#and then the next morning i woke up and realised i had accidentally puked a bit on the floor and had to clean it up all by myself#on the other hand my friends like.... i was so scared and worried that I would ruin their day for them#and they were okay with helping me clean up. and they made sure i was feeling okay after. and they bought me water#and said it was ok and it was expected of them and it was okay if i didnt pay them back for the water they bought and everything#and when i had to sit down to puke again they just sat around me and talked abt how nice the nightview was while comforting me#idk how to explain how much overwhelming love and care i feel and how much better they made this awful experience#after so long of feeling no one cares and i have to take care of everything myself and that i shld and its disgusting to take care of me#i feel so so much overwhelmimg love and care#i joked abt how i previously wrote a sickfic of sb puking based on my experience and now i want to write one again#but i didnt explain how the first time i wrote it it was because i felt so fricking lonely and i wrote a self-fulfillment fic#of sb being taken care of while i wasnt#and now i want to write a fic to show how much fricking love i felt being taken care of. and how happy i felt.#vent#rant#talking to myself#emetophobia
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You could drink your whole life away and still never get that taste out of your mouth.
half commission for @salempie half completely self indulgent dreck pieced together from our insane conversations abt franke and elka. told myself id finally write a big explanation for all of the dum shit between these two for context so Thats Under The Cut.
so I already wrote some stuff about elka and franke's relationship back in whispering rock so feel free to look at that too . it goes over elkas blindness/‘seeing’ with clairvoyance and how her and franke started talking & all that good stuff
SO FOR STARTERS. a lot of thsi wont make sense without a big breakdown of elka herself. because elkas potential as a character is like insane to me. like just the idea of her in the long run of her life reads as something so potentially tragic; a young girl whos plagued with visions of doom and destined to be an outcast even in her own home for things she cant control and clings to the One vision of her wedding that she thinks is 'happy' even despite the fact she doesnt really love the person in it. im choosing to take the li-po doc as canon here because its funny shes the only one with backstory-
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but my fucking god even the smallest look into what her parents are like is soo fucked up to me. and i do think elka especially gets a lot of influence from her mother; its funny how easily you can fit mabel doom into a box just from what elka says about her. knees deep in an avon-esque pyramid scheme and leaning into her daughters depressing ass visions & taking her to therapy at age 11 (which would be good if not for the kind of person you can already assume she is & so i doubt the therapist she has really does her any good. i think they share one). she reads as a very I Am My Daughters Best Friend type of mom to me and i can see elka being a centerpiece of the conversation when she has her Amway Girls over for drinks. wine-mom that lets her kid sip from the glass so she can feel like a big girl type deal.
and you can tell that elka is trying to hard to be too mature for her age even in her campster posts. how she writes letters to nils' mom and exchanges baking recipes with her and that feels like she really only interacts with middle aged women and not really many people her own age outside of camp (like her moms friends). which makes sense shed feel the need to ‘grow up’ early when shes probably had to process so many hard things at a young age bc of her visions.
theres a lot of filling the blanks here of course.
elka obsesses over nils to an overbearing degree even despite the fact he treats her like shit ('you promised no talking' and so on) and she treats him bad right back. she leans onto stereotypical heterosexual ideals like taking care of him and overblowing how Manly and Protective JT is and she admires romance stories like pride and prejudice and it feels like she Projects Soooooooo much of what she wants onto boys she barely feels anything for without knowing what its actually supposed to feel like. and clearly she WANTS that ideal future, a happy marriage, an actual romance- but according to nils even when they were dating she ignored him most of the time, which just seems Very Telling
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like shes filling a role, overcompensating for emotions and lacktherof she cant digest quite yet, and it only makes more sense when you know shes had visions of their future together. how could that be bad for her? shouldnt it be like the books and movies? but she doesnt really connect the fact that her visions are only for Doomed futures, and if she does she certainly doesnt show it. Doomed relationships. it's been a part of her family for generations and she isn't turning out much different, is she? i dont think she even realizes thats all she ever sees yet, just that its Going to happen. that it's Her future, and it always will be
and like, her only reference for a real marriage so far has been her own parents, and she already Knows they have an affair, and theyre doomed to split, (and i actually like to think they were in rough waters anyway and elka was a child meant to mend a crumbling marriage but thats a whole other thing) and so without a framework for what an actual healthy relationship is supposed to be like she cant really grasp that her relationship with nils Isnt that and isnt ever going to be. she can only cling to this one happy idea of the future, and thats why she keeps chasing him, self fulfilling the actuality of her situation and creating and fostering the unhappy life they will inevitably live together.
and that bleeds into everything else in her life, of course, because as the years go on, as the visions grow in number it just makes sense for her to fall into the predictability of her life. she always knows whats going to happen, her visions are Never wrong- so why try to change things? shes had time to process tragedies days, weeks, months, years before they happen, shes had time to settle into every crack of her life. her parents divorce, her various break ups, her future with the psychonauts.
“and she's already seen so much of a future with [nils] she feels trapped almost. Like she has to be happy in it or else it just means her life is miserable. And it's a mixture of pride and fear of the unknown that keeps her clinging to the One thing she knows. BUT LIKE!!! She knows what's gonna happen! It's easier to grieve when she's been grieving for years... She wants so badly to be happy, But to do that she has to step into the unfamiliar. And that's more terrifying than staying the same miserable person she's always been.”
and thats where franke comes in— and yeah you Do have to take a lot of liberties for frankes character since it’s basically, like, all the info for her is just that shes a Supreme Baby Dyke but thats enough for me. i think she has protective butch itch in her . on campster shes defensive over other women evidenced in the way she keeps watch over the girls cabins for lili when elton is pursuing her . but shes also eager to please and constantly trying to make kitty laugh and also Very naive. but she tries! and i think it only solidifies more as she gets Older and really gets a hold of her feelings & her powers. this is incredibly franke to me
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and i think as they grow older together— because i think franke and elka Do stay friends, both because elka is just pathetic and needs that positive connection even if she doesnt realize it and because i think franke is a very Loyal person & annoyingly persistent if you let her be . and i am also a kitty/franke truther. because kittys also important in this web we weave
because i think franke and kitty stay together after camp, to a point— theres a falling out facilitated on kittys end and they break up, but reconnect, and franke kind of... saves kitty from herself a little, from her strict military father whos love only extends thru finances , from her own stifling future , she drives all the way to bakersville in her shitty van handmedowned from her dad and they move in together eventually . they get jobs at the motherlobe , because it’s a pipeline to a decent job, because it’s whats easy, because franke doesn’t really have a future, because she’s never really been good at much, because shes never had much sense, because franke doesnt really care as long as she can live and help, sometimes, if she can, and because kitty’s there, and because elka’s there, and shes so used to being elkas eyes now and shes good at it. shes good at being the muscle of the missions when her colleagues lack it, when hypnosis and predictions arent enough. she likes it that way.
and elka appreciates frankes company. she listens, shes sweet, she does little things for her that no ones ever really put the effort for before; she likes her. franke is strong and bold and makes her laugh and shes always there but god elka cant let go of that future, of that box shes put herself in, that her mothers put her in, of being a Good Wife to a Loving Husband, of getting married normally and falling into unfailing familiarity. thats all shes ever wanted and shes not going to jeopardize that . not for franke, who may not be a boy but is handsome like one, whos always held her after every break up with nils and the men that filled empty days inbetween.
and elka is too stubborn to recognize those feelings anyway. too prideful to accept a way out. too set in her cycle no matter how much she hates it, her little self fulfilling tragedy of her own making, wallowing in her own doom. she struggles for control of her own life when she feels like every choice has been made for her anyway, she puts up her walls and carefully constructs what people see. but franke was always harder to trick, because while empathy isnt a particularly useful psychic power it’s certainly an inconvenient one. all franke has to do is get too close and all those carefully crafted walls fall apart, and elkas control is gone, and thats all she really has. and she tries to distance herself, really she does, but franke is also too persistent. and elka wears gloves, keeps contact that would make her walls crumble from happening as best as she can, but she cant really keep herself from the brief moments where she feels like someone actually fucking cares about her.
and that slightest lack of control, the need to wrestle it back is why she proposes to nils the next time theres a falling out— she knows how it happens, she plans every detail. and he accepts, despite everything. gets her a cheap ring and it feels like lead on her finger and its nothing at all like how shed thought it to be when she was a kid, theres no feather light feeling in her chest, only that dreadful reality that she cant turn this back. BUT WHAT CAN U DO LMAO
elka doesnt tell franke about this engagement until later, on their way back from a mission. late at night when neither of them can sleep, and franke invites elka to smoke in her van, because its been so long since theyve been alone like that, because elkas been so strangely absent lately. and because of everything, because frankes always so damn nice, because elka hates the feel of the ring on her finger, because she let herself get high alone with franke fucking athens whos always been so good at pulling her apart— the truth of it all spills out and its messy and emotional and she hates it, she hates the life shes made for herself, but franke makes it easier to bare and now shes here and shes so close and god she wishes she could see her smile again, she wishes she could see franke, thats all she needs right now and she cant but she can touch her and she can hold her and for tonight, she can be known, she can let those walls crumble, she can be something else just for once here with franke . she can kiss her here in this van, touch that happiness for just a moment, and forget the future that waits for her outside of it. franke begs her to forget the wedding, to just let herself be happy— and god, she wants to, but it means turning her back on everything shes known and everything shes saw to be inevitable, and franke has never been in her future, so if it were supposed to work out why hadnt she seen it and she cant, she cant take that risk but she can have this, even if its temporary, she can have it.
and just as soon as she gets a taste of it, its gone. after that night, after the missions over and theyre back at the motherlobe and have to pretend like nothing happened (franke doesnt, of course she tells kitty about it, she tells kitty about everything.) but that brief moment together haunts elka every time she sees franke, sees herself through frankes eyes, sees herself in her wedding dress because god its all franke can think about! of course it is! she knows how much elkas destroying herself she knows how much misery shes wallowing in that kiss in the van felt like an emotional punch to the teeth and she hasnt ever forgotten it and all she can do is sit and watch while elka throws herself into a loveless marriage. she can come to her wedding and see the way the bride and groom kiss with the emotional weight of a wet towel no matter how hard elka tries to hide it under a pretty dress and bouquets of flowers and meticulous planning.
and elka resents nils but she cant really hate him, its not his fault, not really. he feels trapped just like she does and his feelings of misery only cycle back into hers . they fight and gnash and wear away at each other and its a relationship thats crashed and burned a million times before elka even said i do. and its inevitable that she falls into her mothers habits, a sip of wine here and there to loosen up, until it turns to a glass, until it falls into a bottle on nights when whatever work nils does runs late.
but franke’s still there. shes always been there, hasn’t she? always trying to play knight, always trying to save her, dragging her home when shes stumbling over herself because god who else is going to do it but her? who else is left to care? certainly not nils. never nils. because franke knows her. because franke pities her. shes always pitied her. shes always known. and elka hates it, she resents it, but god in the same breath she’s desperate for it, she envies it to her very bones. elka is a mess but after frankes done with her she has someone to go back to that loves her. and god what elka wouldnt do to have that. to take it and keep it for herself because shes never ever got to have that movie romance shes always wanted.
so now comes this.
because elkas particularly miserable and particularly spiteful and she needs to get franke to understand, just for a moment, drink with her and get on her level and she needs her there with her no matter how her pity makes her feel. no matter how much it makes her shake with anger and envy and desperation, but god the way franke looks at her, the way she still tries to salvage what they have, the soft, slurred way she tells her that it’s okay but its not okay, none of this is okay, it never has been and she just wants franke to shut up and see that, and if she cant then she’ll show her, she’ll show her all the raw angry desperation, with too much teeth and hands that claw and grab and she’ll know why everyones always said she’s too much.
and she knows this puts her on nils’ level too. that this makes her a cheater, that shes no better than he is now. no better than her father and his affair. but god, she wants to be selfish. she wants to be in control. just for once. she wants to feel right and she wants to feel happy and she wants to feel loved. thats all shes ever wanted. and franke will let her have that, just for a little while, at the very least.
anyway. sorry. sorry for being crazy . this isnt even getting into the shit after the comic takes place . elkas stupid brainworld thag she has to overcome in order to finally be allowed in the polycule and live happily ever as worlds first lesbian divorceman
sorry for all the shit i make up instead of caring about actual characters with screentime . bye !
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darkbluekies · 9 months
Note
Don't know if anyone asked but what would the yandere's reaction be to the reader patching them up after they get injured?
Warnings: mentions of cuts, blood, killing, yandere, feeling depressed? (I'm not sure what to call it)
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Silas: 
He is strongly against you seeing him in this kind of condition. He’s supposed to be your protector, supposed to take care of you … not the other way around. But you manage to push him down on the toilet and start to clean his wounds while he hisses and curses, although afterwards, he’ll shower you in kisses and tell you how grateful he is.
“You’re not supposed to — fuck — do this. I can take care of myself, you know. Give me that — oh motherfucker — that disinfectant and I’ll do it myself. Yes, I am happy that you’re worried about me, but this isn’t my proudest moment, baby. Let me spare some damn dignity.”
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Dr Kry: 
He has cut his palm deeply on one of his sharp tools while cleaning up after a surgery. He returns to your room where he keeps all of his stuff. His hands are shaking too much to be able to clean it. You decide to help him before he bleeds out. Dr Kry guides you through the process to make sure you do everything as you should.
“Take that and pat it on my hand. Be careful though, that disinfectant is pretty strong. Ouch — I’m fine, don’t worry. Then you have to take the bandage and wrap it around my hand nad wrist. Don’t wrap it until my hand turns blue, but make sure that its tight. Good job, Y/N. I think I’m good now. But now you need to get back to bed, you know that you shouldn’t be out too much … as a thank you, I can get you dessert after dinner, alright?”
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King Edmund:
Cut in the shoulder by a sword. An enemy had caught him in a vulnerable moment. You sit him down on the side of the bed and remove his shirt before starting to clean the wound. Edmund groans and throws his head back to avoid seeing the mess. Although complaining a lot, he doesn’t want anyone else treating him. No one but you are worthy enough to touch his body.
“Hurry up, please! For the love of all mighty, aren’t you done soon? I’m going to die! Yes, I am, you wouldn’t know. I’m going to mangle that scum who had the nerve to dislocate my shoulder. Y/N, you are going to take care of me until I’m well again, won’t you? You have to. I’m your king … your husband. You need to take care of me.”
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Jerry:
Another one who’s extremely against you seeing her in this condition. She tries to push you away when you try to help her, but she’s too weak. In the end, you manage to corner her in the bathroom and treat her bloody wounds. For once, her hard demeanor seem to fall. She’s quiet, limp. You ask what’s on her mind, fearing for why she’s not being her normal dramatic, sarcastic self.
“I honestly thought that I was going to die … I have never been so … scared before. I’m pathetic, aren’t I? Yes, I am. Don’t try to tell me otherwise. I know it already. You should have left me alone, Y/N. You shouldn’t patch me up. You should have left me to die. I love you. I know I don’t say that a lot, I just wanted you to … know. Sorry for being a pathetic pussy … I just … nevermind.”
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Hedwig: 
She’s crying while you clean the wound on her cheek. She had been shaving off some baby hairs — a trick she’d seen online — but had been too uncertain, resulting in her cutting herself. You clean it softly and place a bandaid over it. 
“I look so ugly, don’t I? I can’t go to school like this! People will laugh at me. Everyone will know that i tried to shave and that I couldn’t do it. Please stay with me, Y/N, stay with me forever. You’re the only one who doesn’t care what I look like. It doesn’t look … that bad … right? I never want to be without you, i dont think i could do it.”
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whyse7vn · 4 months
Text
SHIPPED -
[ot7 x reader]
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TAEHYUNG -
tae: pop quiz should i kill myself?
y/n: please
tae: knew it
you fucking hate me and you ARE in love with that mingi guy
y/n: mingi
tae: it’s okay baby no need to apologise i know how crazy fans can get and i know you love me and me ONLY
not mingi
come here let’s cuddle (fuck)
y/n: k
tae: wait 😭😭😭
baby you forgot you apologise
y/n: for what
tae: mingi
they are shipping you with mingi
i can’t even say his name
y/n: you’ve said his name like four times already
tae: ok but i threw up every time
y/n: but you still said his name?
tae: what is your problem
y/n: i miss mingi i’m sorry
i get mad when i don’t see my man for a while
tae: aw babe 🥰
come over
y/n: did you even read what i said?
tae: i’m depressed
y/n: cool don’t care ur not mingi
tae: i could be
y/n: no you couldn’t
tae: ok but
y/n: but?
tae: nothing
y/n: that’s what i thought
loser
tae: don’t call me that
yk it gets me hot and bothered
y/n: are you horny or depressed
tae: don’t ask me stupid questions wtf
ofc i’m horny 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
do you want to fuck?
say yes
y/n: saying no
tae: ok wtf
you really are with mingi aren’t you
y/n: yeah
tae: babe
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ur changing i can’t stand this my heart can’t take this damage and the way i feel can’t stand this mmmmm baby i don’t understand this
y/n: did you just sing xxxtentacion lyrics to me
tae: he gets me
y/n: ok
tae: you don’t get me
y/n: thank god
tae: ok now say omg tae ur the only one for me not that moji guy
y/n: moji?
tae: motor?
y/n: ?
tae: mistletoe????
y/n: what
tae: minion
y/n: mingi?
tae: mitochondria
y/n: mingi.
tae: microscope
y/n: it’s mingi
tae: no i think it’s misconstruction
y/n: what do you want from me rn
tae: tell miscarriage to fuck off
y/n: i literally met him once
tae: so???
he wants you
i know it
all the shippers know it
and all these STUPID edits know it
delete his number now
y/n: i don’t even have his number
tae: oh
ok then
y/n: yeah
tae: so like
y/n: don’t ask me anything stupid
tae: thoughts on iceland banning the colour green
y/n: you just made that up
why
ur so strange
tae: babe can i sing for you again
ik u love it when i sing
y/n: leave me alone tae
tae: do you let michael sing to you???
not jackson btw
cuz he’s like dead
y/n: would you like to join him
tae: mingloo or michael jackson???
pls be more specific babe
hey
where did you go
seen?????
ur leaving me on seen are you fr????
ok at least it’s not delivered
or a block like last time
ur real mean yk
at least i know my worlds are getting to you
now let me sing ok?
it might seem crazy what i am 'bout to say
sunshine she's here you can take a break
i'm a hot air balloon that could go to space
ok why did my messages go green
oh
i’m blocked
again
hahahahahaha
cheating fuck
FUCK YOU AND MINTY
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SEOKJIN -
jin: the way i don’t even care
y/n: what
jin: i don’t care
y/n: idk this song i’m sorry
jin: i’m not singing
y/n: oh
jin: can he cook
y/n: who
jin: ur mc buddy
y/n: minghao?
jin: yeah
ur new boyfriend can he cook better than me?
no nvm
don’t tell me i don’t even care
not one bit not even two bits
y/n: okay?
jin: no it’s not ok
what about this is ok
OH WOW UR NEW BOYFRIEND IS 26 I DONT EVEN CARE
y/n: why are you shouting at me
jin: I DON’T CARE
LOOK AT ME DOES IT LOOK LIKE I EVEN CARE
y/n: lowkey
jin: he can’t cook
look at his fingers they look weak
a man with weak fingers can’t cook
y/n: ur so right
jin: yeah i know
so can he cook?
y/n: idk babe
jin: why don’t you know
y/n: because i don’t
jin: he’s your man says twitter
you should know these things
y/n: is this you jealous rn?
jin: i don’t even care what are you talking about
y/n: my fault i thought you cared for a second
jin: well i don’t
do you have his number
y/n: yeah
jin: don’t care
y/n: u sure?
jin: whatever man
he was weak fingers
he looks like he has a lisp does he have a lisp?
y/n: no??
jin: yes he does
stupid lispy bitch
y/n: SEOKJIN DONT BE MEAN
lisps are cute
jin: do you like his lisp?
bet you wanna kiss him every time he speaks
bet he’s all like “i theriously thlipping love thew” all in ur ear
and u blush so bad
y/n: LAMSOSOD WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
jin: i don’t care take ur 26 year old lisp bitch
y/n: all this because of a few stupid shippers?
jin: he looks at you a lot
and you look at him
A LOT
there are so many videos
you look at him like you wanna get him pregnant
y/n: what the fuck
jin: you should only look at me like that
y/n: i’m sorry????
jin: i don’t care for your sorry
or this situation
or that ur new man is 26
i don’t CARE
y/n: ok baby
jin: if i smoked i would light a cigarette rn
y/n: i believe you
jin: good
would be like a chain smoker rn
y/n: i believe you baby
jin: and i’m not talking about that little emo band thing or whatever
y/n: didn’t think you were
jin: me
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cuz i’m i’m a chain smoker in spirit
y/n: !!!
jin: girlfriend
y/n: boyfriend
jin: ….
so like i’m gonna be honest
y/n: ok
jin: i do care
y/n: no way
jin: ik it’s hard to believe cuz i’m a good actor and all
y/n: naturally
jin: but wow why is he looking at you like he needs to be inside of you
y/n: ok ew?
jin: right i was thinking the same thing
y/n: why would you say that
jin: WHY WOULD HE LOOK AT YOU LIKE THAt?????????
y/n: let’s end this conversation
jin: let’s end his life
y/n: gn jin
jin: think about it
y/n: no
jin: when he looks at you do you feel uncomfortable
y/n: i’m uncomfortable rn
jin: OHMYGOD IS HE WITH YOU
IS HE LOOKING????
BABE TELL ME
y/n: no
jin: i’m literally a chain smoker
in spirit
cuz smoking ages you
look at jungkook 26 looking 206
y/n: goodnight jin
jin: so is ur new man with u or not??
y/n: no jin
goodnight
jin: good i didn’t even care anyways
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YOONGI -
yoongi: fuck you
you know what you did
y/n: contrary to popular belief i am unfortunately not all knowing nor am i a mind reader
yoongi: kill yourself
y/n: full of love and joy today i see <3
yoongi: do you know
how may edits i’ve seen of that one clip of you and soobin
why is he smiling so hard at you???
tf is his issue
ur not fucking funny at all trust me i know
and you look really good
why are you looking good around other people???
and WHY did you touch him
and why the fuck did he blush so hard?
you need to kill yourself it’s the only option
y/n: strange way of telling me ur deeply in love with me but i’ll take it
yoongi: kill yourself
y/n: WAIT WDYM IM NOT FUNNY
yoongi: am i laughing rn?
y/n: okay that’s not how being funny works
it comes naturally
yoongi: naturally it doesn’t come to you and that’s fine
y/n: yes it does
soobin thinks i’m funny
and so does everyone else
yoongi: soobin doesn’t count cuz he’s a loser
he was also looking at ur tits the whole time i would be smiling if ur tits were in my face too
and everyone else? yeah shut up
ur not funny and that’s ok
y/n: HE WAS NOT
just ur a sick pervert doesn’t mean every man i come into contact is as well
soobin is a nice respectful young man
and are you trying to say my only personality trait is my tits????
that’s real fucked up actually!!!
yoongi: i mean it’s not ur humour thats for sure
y/n: and you think ur comedian of the year?
yoongi: i pull my weight
y/n: YOONGI
baby
babe
be fr
i’m the funny one in this relationship and that’s ok
your good at other things
yoongi: that’s crazy
we must be a really unfunny couple then yikes
y/n: what is ur beef?
yoongi: you and soobin
y/n: soobin is a baby to me
there is no me and soobin
yoongi: yeah ok
he’s 6 ft yk?
y/n: i know
stood next to him
yoongi: did you compare hand sizes
y/n: are you calling me a whore?
yoongi: is he funny?
y/n: yoongi
yoongi: is he funnier than me??
y/n: no yoongi
yoongi: wow that’s insane thought i wasn’t funny??????
soobin must have the personality of a fucking rock then
y/n: rolling my eyes real hard rn
yoongi: is he a good kisser?
y/n: ok now ur being ridiculous
yoongi: you touched his arm
y/n: he’s suit was fucked up
yoongi: have you imagined him in a wedding suit
y/n: what
yoongi: was his skin soft when you touched him
y/n: again he was wearing suit didn’t feel his skin at all
yoongi: bet you wanted to
y/n: ur impossible actually
incoming FaceTime call from yoongi :3
yoongi: answer me
y/n: are you going to apologise for telling me to kms
yoongi: no
want to see ur pretty face tho
answer pls
y/n: why would i answer after that
yoongi: pls
y/n: you want me so bad
yoongi: me or soobin?
y/n: …
yoongi: ok sorry
answer :3
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JUNGKOOK -
jk: hey can wonbin do a kick flip?
y/n: idk probably
jk: wkjsjsjxjdjswiiwskdkekekdkwkke KSSKXKSKSKSKCKDMDKDJDJSKDKKKWOQWOSODKDKSKDKDJEKDKDKSKDDKDKDKKDKSKDKDKDKDKKCKMDKDCDKDKDKKDKDKFDKDKKDKDKDDKKDDKDKDKDKKDKDKDKDDJDKDKKDKDKDKDKSKDKDKDKDKDKKDKDKDDKKDDKDKDKFKDKDKDKAKS/@@:@;’ wmkdkdkdkdkd sskskdk kddkmdmdmdxm-@/29/929920//09/9/9:9
y/n: woah ok?
you don’t even skate why does this matter?
jk: exactly
y/n: i’m not following
jk: do you know his songs?
y/n: pulling back the sirennnnnnnnnnnn
jk:😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
y/n: ??
you literally asked me to? why are you crying
jk: do you have his number?
y/n: yeah
jk: /‘sjdjdjcjkdidfkckkdkfkdkdk&/&&/&/8/88/8/8/8/88/8818:’snn@2@:’dndn’dmn**$*****$\$$\$$€!!!!’annanjjjsnsnsndjxjxjjxjjxjzjj&/&:&:&/&7(7(7(7(&?&!@!@)&();6;6:5;7)&??,(:3-;:&)9!£0£@!&()::54:(,£,&?@£9£0&0£9£9£9)&(7;5:437)&££9&9)@(7(7(6(£?&!9&0@!’ b gxfxgxgstdgcnjhkbvkhnb hchdtsrdhchvkhopjpjojonobkvjbjvgihighij
y/n: jungkook…
jk: has he ever looked you in the eyes?
y/n: babe
jk: he has hasn’t he?
KILL ME NOWWWWWWWWEEWWWWWEJEJEJJEJEJWJWWWWENENEJEJEJNEJEJEENENNENNWJEJEJEJJEJWJEJEJEJEJEJEEJJWJWEJJEJWJWJWJWJEJEJEJENEJEJEJEJEJEJEJJEEJJEJEJJWJEJWJWJJWWJJWJWJWJWJWJWJWJWJWJWJJWJWNWNWNWNWWNWNWNWNWNWNWNENENNENENENENDNRNNRNDNNRNDNENENNENENENENENENENENNE
but can even sing?
y/n: yes kook
that is literally his job
jk: NOOSIEOSOSOOSOSOSOOOOO SNJSJSJDJDJSJSJDNMDNDMDNCMDMNDNDMDNDNDNDNDNDNNXJDJDN SNJSJSNDMDMDNDNDJDKXJDCJNXXNNCDNNXNXNX SJSJZKSJXNSJXJX JSJXMMXMX JXNXNDNNXNNDXNSNDN SJDJNDNXNXJXJX JSJXJXNXJCXJXJSISKS SJDJDJNDNDNDNDKNXXND NSJXJJDJXJDJD NJDJDJSJSJSJDJKDKDD DNDJKXKXKDXNXJX JSJDNDJDJSKISISOSKSKKS
there are so many tears in my eyes i can’t see
i cant think
i cant be
my left lung has given out and i’m losing hearing in both my ears
they are probably gonna have to amputate both my big toes and a couple fingers
it’s fading too black
baby
babe
pretty girl
can you hear me
do you care for me
did you ever care
did you even love me
y/n: jeon jungkook
jk: loml
y/n: get over it
jk: ok
y/n: ….
jk: i’m sorry
i love you
what even is a wonbin?
my biggest enemy in this life thats who
y/n: what happened to being sorry and over it?
jk: but babyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
everyone is saying he’s like in love with you
and he can do a kick flip
what if you pick him
y/n: i said he could probably do a kick flip
not that he actually can
why does that even matter?
jk: cuz kick flips are cool
and bitch takeable
y/n: what
jk: he might pop a kick flip out of nowhere and steal you
i cant have that
y/n: learn how to kick flip then idk?
jk: BUT YOU TOOK MY SKATEBOARD AWAY
y/n: oh yeah i did
didnt you almost brake ur face?????
AND you kept riding it in the house
pretty reasonable of me
jk: so what ur saying that ur waiting for wonbin to kick flip in front of you
y/n: ?????????
no
jungkook i am not leaving u for wonbin
jk: you say that but when he drops the most sexiest panty dropping kick flip known to man right in front of you i’m gonna be left single and depressed
y/n: you are stressing me out
jk: can i have the skateboard back
y/n: no
jk: 😞
Y/n: i said no jungkook
jk: 😕
y/n: stop
jk: ☹️
y/n: fine whatever idk break all ur bones
jk: kick flip kook coming soon >.<
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JIMIN -
jimin: pretend i’m wonho for a second ok?
y/n: wonho?
jimin: yeah wonho
y/n: boob
jimin: hey lol ur really pretty 😍 😋❤️‍🔥 you should totally ditch that ugly lame excuse of a boyfriend you have (jimin) 🤢🤮 and come be my girl 💯🤗🥰❤️❤️❤️❤️
y/n: boob 🤤
jimin: be mine
y/n: show me ur tits
jimin: u fucking cheating bitch
y/n: wonho don’t be mean 😢
jimin: i am no longer wonho
i am jimin
y/n: lame
turn back
we want wonho
we want wonho
jimin: who is we
y/n: me and the voices in my head idk
jimin: even the voices not even fucking with me anymore???
ohmygod
the wonho shippers were right
y/n: what the shippers saying
jimin: “y/n just looks so bored with jimin” “did you see her smile when wonho was mentioned”
y/n: WAITTTT THEY SPITTING 🙏🏽🔥🔥🔥
jimin: do you know how insane that is
LIKE YOU LOOK BORED WITH ME
BABE LIKE THATS SO INSANE
y/n: ig u got to get ur funny up idk
jimin: do you understand how this is impacting my mental health
y/n: i like when their a bit insane dw 😍
jimin: i’m real fucking insane
i hear voices
constantly
they tell me to do things
i listen to jay park
you like that huh?
y/n: ok calm down i said a bit insane not jay park lover insane
wtf is wrong with you
jimin: are you bored
y/n: sorry what were you saying i almost felt asleep
jimin: i hope wonho treats you right
y/n: yk i’m tit level to wonho
isn’t that perfect
my face just all up in there
constantly
jimin: me and him are the same height?
y/n: ok but it’s more exciting with wonho
jimin: should i get a boob job???
y/n: please
jimin: WOW
the standards these days are insane
you were supposed to tell me my body is perfect the way it is
y/n: it is
jimin: wow ur so convincing!!!
y/n: i mean it fr fr babe love u body yk that
little tittes matter too
im for the cause!!!!!!!!!!
jimin: i came to you for love and reassurance
y/n: i think i provided
jimin: i’m gonna kill myself infront on wonho
so he’s traumatised
y/n: i did say i like them a bit insane
but whose to say he’ll go insane from watching YOU die????
jimin: excuse me?
y/n: i’m just saying
jimin: a lot of people would go insane from watching ME die
y/n: not wonho
jimin: you can never be too sure
y/n: no i’m sure
jimin: are you trying to find out rn???
y/n: do it
you won’t
jimin: do you love me be honest
y/n: the most
jimin: fucking simp lmao
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NAMJOON -
y/n: HIIIIIII JOONIE 😝😍
namjoon: hi
y/n: ????????????????????????????????
?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
namjoon: ?
y/n: where is my “hi love”
where is the love
where is the life
not even a silly emoji???????????
who took my bitch
namjoon: death soon i hope
y/n: emo era joon omg?
namjoon: where are u rn?
y/n: some boba place with tae and kook
namjoon: oh
we’ve never gotten boba together
y/n: you don’t like boba joon??
namjoon: taste buds change??
y/n: we can go on a boba date tomorrow if you want?
namjoon: no
y/n: LAMOSOSK
ok babe
namjoon: yk people think ur fucking tae?
y/n: ew
namjoon: i’m not joking
like people think you’re cheating on me with tae
y/n: people always think i’m cheating
namjoon: yeah…
but like not with tae :/
and there isn’t always all these edits and stuff
people are even in our weverse talking about it
y/n: people are so silly
namjoon: yeah
why are you calling me?
y/n: why aren’t you answering?
namjoon: don’t want to interrupt ur date
y/n: my date???
namjoon: your date.
y/n: namjoon
namjoon: yeah
y/n: ur being silly
namjoon: in this clip ur looking at tae like he hung the all stars in the sky for you or something
y/n: get off twitter
namjoon: i’m gonna end my life
y/n: babe
namjoon: cheater 😔
y/n: jonnie r u jealous rn >.<
namjoon: i’m not jealous
y/n: what are you then?
namjoon: heartbroken?
sad
depressed
on the verge of suicide
y/n: tipsy?
namjoon: NO HAHA WHY WOULD YOU THINK THAT??????
y/n: yeah thought so
this is a little out of character of you babe
kinda jungkook core idk
namjoon: did you just compare me to jungkook???????????????????????
do you want me to kill myself that bad
oh my god
are you fucking jungkook too??????
y/n: ?????
namjoon: is boba code for sex
y/n: no namjoon
namjoon: yeah ok
cheater 😞
after i learned what rizz was for you..
y/n: i’m am not fucking tae or jungkook my love
namjoon: was my rizz not good enough
y/n: are you listening to me joonie????
namjoon: it wasn’t was it
ofc it wasn’t
i’m sorry i wasn’t good enough
sorry i didn’t have enough rizz
i’m really sorry
y/n: namjoon
namjoon: no you know what
i really tried it wasn’t my fault
no one deserves to be cheated on like this
it’s all your fault
y/n: oh
namjoon: i’m guilt tripping you
y/n: what
namjoon: are you coming home now?
y/n: ???
namjoon: baby
y/n: you can’t tell someone ur guilt tripping them
that’s not how it works
namjoon: baby i’m not guilt tripping you
y/n: it’s too late now
i know what ur doing
namjoon: baby
y/n: wait…..
namjoon: waiting
y/n: no
ur not
namjoon: baby what’s wrong???
y/n: baby?
don’t tell me ur horny rn joon
namjoon: would that be so bad baby?
y/n: these mood swings??? insane actually
thought i was a cheater
now you wanna fuck???
namjoon: life is crazy
are you coming home???
or would you rather fuck taehyung instead
my fault
i’ll just go…
y/n: ur toxic
namjoon: ur a cheater
come home cheater
y/n: yeah yeah give me 20
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HOSEOK -
hobi: hawk putuh
ik ur awake
and i know you see these rumours
y/n: did you just fucking spit on me??
hobi: yeah and what
will do it again
hawk putuh
told you
i don’t lie in these parts of town
don’t enjoy it too much
flipping freak
y/n: what rumours
hobi: don’t ignore my second spit wtf
y/n: shut up
hobi: u trying to get drunk and nasty rn? 😝
y/n: ?no
hobi: no u right we supposed to be arguing
y/n: i’m always right
and why are we supposed to be arguing?
hobi: umm that’s NOT true
and people are literally shipping you with mingyu rn…
y/n: how is that my fault
hobi: WRONG ANSWER
hawk putuh
y/n: stop spitting on me
hobi: you like it
y/n: no i don’t
hobi: wow you’ve changed
you used to like it
did mingyu change you???
where is the y/n i know and love
where is my y/n who likes spit
you should never let a man change you
be who you are
and what who you are is my spit loving girlfriend so act like it
y/n: i have never let you spit on me
like ever
hobi: why is that ur focus rn
you should be denying the fact that you’ve changed for mingyu
y/n: i haven’t changed for mingyu and i don’t like spit leave me alone
it’s 2 am hoseok
hobi: why are they shipping you with him what the hell pretty 😞
i’m in my feels rn
feeling aju not fucking nice rn
y/n: cheer up
hobi: no
y/n: ok fuck you then
hobi: i bet mingyu is giggling and blushing and at all of these stupid edits
UGH
by bts
i’m sick to my stomach
y/n: get better
hobi: word on the street is head makes the pain go away
y/n: on the street by jhope ft jcole
hobi: would you give head to mingyu be honest
y/n: you don’t want my honesty right now…
hobi: i do
y/n: let’s just say
hobi: NVM
nvm
let’s not say anything
how about we just hold hands at look each other deeply in the eyes
y/n: i’m cool with that
hobi: are you cool with mingyu
y/n: cool with you by newjeans
hobi: me?
little old me >.<
y/n: always you
hobi: lol stop loveboming me wtf
y/n: yeah kys
about to give mingyu the sloppiest top known to man
hobi: mingyu doesn’t even like girls like you
y/n: girls like me???
hobi: yeah
i don’t need to explain i think you get it
y/n: are you calling me ugly rn…
hobi: you said it not me
y/n: ok
hobi: ok
y/n: hawk putuh
hobi: you didn’t….
y/n: i did
hobi: what fuck
y/n: yeah and what
hobi: what if i said
y/n: no
hobi: yeah
i enjoyed it real bad
do it again
let me catch it this time
😋
y/n: fuck off fuck you leave me alone
hobi: mingyu would never treat you like i do
y/n: i’m sold
tell mingyu i’m on my way
hobi: …
tags: @piw6n @92jinnies @birdie-vhs @kooksmilitarywife @hob3loveofmylife @jujubiism @bloopkook @ratchetpizza1 @myntalks @arloo00 @watamotee33 @y2kcy3brz @taiwan0618 @freyadanvers @gguksbeloved @raetf @bbsantc @winuvs @medicinemybish @bxnnyhime @leleluvsbts @baetukki @zyaaaszn @thelilbutifulthings @jazminethecreator @k4ngelz @jmnscutie @sopebubbles-replies
lowkey hating joons and kooks but it’s okay better shit to come this just my warm up ong 🙏🏽💯🔥
310 notes · View notes
blackest-soul · 7 months
Text
A Short Girl’s Guide to Working at the BAU
I. Dealing with Morgan
Derek: How short are you?
Y/N: you mean how tall?
Derek: no, how short??? You can barely reach my shoulders!
Y/N, in a soft voice: not my fault i got the southeast asian genes and you are very aware that im only 4’9 so shut up ok.
Derek: fine fine fine. So, just out of curiosity…hmm can i, well, can i use you as a hand rest coz u are the perfect height!!!
Y/N: do that and you will die
II. Emily and her unwanted maternal instinct
*Y/N, walking around the bullpen without her ID, in a backpack*
Concerned Agent: hey, hey kid. Are you lost? Where’s your guardian? You cant just go walking around here…
Y/N, spotting Emily and pointing at her: Don’t worry, Agent. There’s my mom. I’ll just go and talk to her.
Concerned Agent: huh, didn’t know she has a child. Wait let me call her for you. SSA Prentiss!! Your daughter is here!!!!
Emily: WTF ARE YOU ON ABOUT?
Emily, seeing Y/N: STOP CALLING ME YOUR MOTHER YOU ARE 25 ffs!!!! WE DONT EVEN LOOK SIMILAR!!!
Y/N: not my fault he can’t remember me.
Y/N: so mom, what’s for lunch?
Emily: i packed you an extra sandwich. You should eat more.
Also, Emily: why the fuck am i mothering you!?? I can’t even take care of myself
III. A tired singlefather!Hotch
Hotch, reprimanding Y/N for all her choices in life: … and lastly, stop eating expired and dirty food! I saw you eating your sandwich after you dropped on the floor for lunch!!!! Am i not giving you enough allowance?
Y/N: the food barely touched the floor!!! Besides germs wait for the five second rule so i am going to be fine. And what allowance???!!!??
Hotch: you are giving me a migraine. Shut up and let me process the words that just came out of your mouth
Y/N: really???? maybe you should start eating dropped sandwiches more coz i do not get migraines
Hotch: one more sound and you will be grounded
Y/N: as if!!! What are you gonna do?
Hotch: no phone
Y/N: we need phones for work
Hotch: no internet for a week
Y/N: try again, I work with Penny.
*Reid, walking by to get another coffee*
Hotch: No Reid
Y/N: NO REEIIDD!!!!
Hotch: YES! NO REIDD
Y/N: you cant just do that!!!
Hotch: YES I CAN!!! NO REID TIL COLLEGE, YOUNG WOMAN!!
Y/N: TIL COLLEGE!!!!!!!! Rossi will hear about this
A few moments later
Reid, to Hotch: hey Hotch, can Y/N and I hang out later? I wanna invite her to watch a movie with me.
Hotch: No.
Reid: what do you mean NO.
Hotch: She’s grounded. NO REID TIL COLLEGE.
Reid: she has two PhDs already.
Hotch, unblinking: NO. REID. TIL COLLEGE.
IV. Rossi and the granddaughter he never asked for but clearly loves
Rossi: so tell me what ails you, bambino.
Y/N, pouting and whining: Hotch *hiccups* grounded *hiccups* me. He said *hiccups* I cannot see Reid. Til college *wails, while dramatically throwing herself to the sofa*
Rossi: don’t you cry now, cara. I will talk to your father about this. Here’s $100. Go buy yourself something nice for your date with Reid.
Y/N: it is not a date, nonno. Just a movie.
Rossi: Regardless, take it. I will talk to, Hotch.
V. Reid and his never ending explanations of “yes she is my girlfriend. no i am not a pedophile, we met when she’s 25. yes i am sure she is 25. And no i am not dating a high schooler”
*Reid and Y/N, finally on their movie date.*
Bouncer: hey young lady. Do you know this man?
Y/N: oh yes, sir. He is my boyfriend. If you will excuse us, we need to catch a movie.
Bouncer, suspiciously looking at Reid
Reid: SHE IS 25!!!!
Bouncer, suspicious stare intensifies
Reid: she is just short please we are adults
Bouncer:
Reid:
Y/N:
Y/N: here is my ID, sir. We work for the FBI. I am Asian and just really short.
Bouncer: oh okay. Sorry. You can never be sure these days.
Reid: thank you for looking out for other people, though
Bouncer, suspicious stare:
Reid, whispers: wtf
288 notes · View notes
tangerinesilk · 9 months
Text
- I CAN SEE YOU : TANGERINE X FEM!READER
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tangerine is going on a solo mission… well, at least he thinks he is. with lemon missing by his side, he’s left with one other option that is supposed to make his job easier. unfortunately for him, you’re not the easiest to work with. stubborn, strong-minded and feisty. you’re both so alike yet nothing has made your bloods boil more than each other. 
rating ✷ r (18+ minors dni!)
warnings ✷ (very quick) smut: fem receiving, kisses all over bodies, a needy but quick hj, p in v, dirty talk, praising, implied rough (consensual) sex / others: cursing, drinking alcohol, mention and use of guns and violence, male hurting female (?) but not between main characters, mentions of blood and wounds.
tropes ✷ enemies to lovers!!!, person a is all talk no bite + person b knows that but still pushes them, playful banter, hiding together in small spaces, fake dating (?), if one is hurt– the other goes a bit crazy, says ‘i dont care’ then cares 5 seconds later. 
word count ✷ 6k!
songs that fit the vibe ✷ i can see you - taylor swift | moth to a flame - swedish house mafia + the weeknd | king of my heart - taylor swift | attention - charlie puth | nonsense - sabrina carpenter
a/n ✷ so i made a poll a months ago and this trope + pairing won! i’ve honestly been wanting to write a dave lizewski one as well and got a request idea. so.. we will see lmao. i will probably post then maybe edit later if there's still things i don't like... also, if you couldn't tell but im kind of a swiftie so i will love to write fics inspired by whole ass albums y'all.
but i hope this is what u guys expected and wanted. i actually do love writing for tangerine. just gives into my delulu thoughts. also, if you guys would like a plain pwp fic and not all of this fluff and dialogue stuffed inside, pls let me know bc i am definitely into that idea. 🫡
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“You had to go and get yourself shot… then you wonder why you have to wear a bulletproof vest. Fuckin’ hell.” 
Tangerine kept his voice at a hushed tone, basically talking under his breath as he strutted through the grand hall of the hotel. Golden light glossed over his figure, passing by couples who were at standing tables with their cocktails.
“Well, Thomas said-”
“Thomas didn’t say shit. Don’t get me fuckin’ started now.”
Lemon already knew Tan was in a bad mood. Another Thomas the Tank Engine factoid wasn’t a playful move right now.
“Hey, mate. Don’t get all fussy wit’ me. You’re just mad about your new partner for the night.” Lemon rolled his eyes.
“Can’t believe I can’t be held accountable of myself. I can handle it on my own but you had to call the fuckin’ princess-” 
“She’s good. Your denial is obnoxious, bruv. It’s only a night, you get in and get out.” Lemon replied, holding his wounded side as he laid in his bed back in England, “What happened between you two that you’ve got beef like this?”
“No time to explain nor do I have the patience.” He arrived at the small bar to the side of the room, “If I leave her behind, can I take half the pay that’s supposed to be hers?” Tangerine asked.
“She’s supposed to be wearing a red dress. You’ll see her there… and please don’t cause a scene.” His brother begged.
“No promises.” He replied before hanging up. 
Tangerine blows a sigh past his lips, quickly asking for his drink of choice before scanning the mass of people around him. His blue eyes could only search so fast for the man that the hit was called on, causing him an instant frustration when he’s already worried about you ruining things regardless of how long you’re together.
“He’s next to the woman in the tacky gold ballgown… about two feet away from the ice sculpture.” Your soft voice suddenly spoke next to him, “But, I didn’t need to tell you that, right?”
The smirk on your face burned at his nerves and you noticed the clench in his jaw.
“Well, if it isn’t the fuckin’ Queen herself.” He said in a stern tone, “What? Germany was too borin’ for ya? Had to figure out a way to ruin someone’s operation?”
“Lemon is the one who called me in, and it isn’t about you. It’s about the pay out… you’re bound to screw something up with your ‘shoot first, ask questions later’ tactic.” You trailed, rolling your eyes as you turned your head away.
“And I’m certainly not afraid to use that tonight and not your fucked up, painfully long mind games like some fuckin’ psycho thilling killer.” He spat as his drink was place in front of him.
You narrowed your eyes at him, “Fuck you.”
“Darling, I’m flattered, but we have more important things to do right now.” He lowly groaned, purposefully looking at his target so his back was facing toward you.
Behind his tall stature, you glimpsed past his shoulder and saw your target chatting up a woman. 
He won’t be smiling for long, you thought.
“Alright, I’ll wait for him to slip away, follow him and you go through the kitchen.” Tangerine said under his breath, keeping quiet for only you to hear him.
“To go where?” You ask, walking around him to stand face to face.
“Erm…” He sighed, “Whatever car or vehicle you got here in, drive yourself back to whatever place you’re staying and I’ll figure out how to wire you the money.” He shrugged, downing the rest of his drink.
He took a step but you placed your hand on the center of his chest, “Not so fast. I’m not going down if you make a mess of this.”
“I don’t make messes. Well, actually, I get away with them once I’ve done ‘em so, I don’t need to worry about a liability.” Tangerine smirked, a bit of a tilt to his head. Cheeky bastard.
“The only liability here is the one who is ready to pull the trigger in his back.” You said before huffing, “I’m not sorry for what happened in Paris, but that was my choice. So, I’m going with you because it’s our operation. You know… I don’t need a fucking helping hand either.” You practically growled.
The two of you held a long gaze, creating a tense eye contact before he sighed, “Didn’t even say anythin’ about Paris, but if you’d like to assume I’m still mad ‘bout that, be my guest, princess.”
His shoulder bumped yours, making you clench your jaw before quickly following behind his tall stature. While he seemed persistent, you grabbed his hand which made him stop in his tracks in the middle of the dance floor.
He turned, “Am I your babysitter?”
“No, you’re my date. Hold my hand, you idiot.” Your eyes pierced through his.
As he looked down at your hand, he slowly grasped it, your fingers intertwining with one another’s before he proceeded through the glamorous crowd.
Couples swayed and waltzed between each step you took, assuming you were unnoticed by your target. Tangerine kept his eyes on him, easy to with the frosty-white full head of hair he had slicked back. The woman in the tacky dress ran her hand down his shoulder, pressing her lips to his ear to whisper something which made you and Tangerine veer to the side at a standing table.
“Are they movin’?” He asked, facing his back toward them.
Your eyes smoothly shift, taking a quick glance at the assumed couple. You ran your hand down Tangerine’s arm, accidentally feeling how toned his bicep was through the thick fabric of his suit jacket. You almost glanced down, wanting to give another squeeze before clearing your throat. A heat rose on your cheeks as you turned your head to face away from him.
“Y-Yeah, near the bathroom. There’s also a backdoor that leads up to the second floor… lots of private rooms for reasons that are obvious.” You said in a hushed tone, moving away from him to the other side of the table.
“Alright, since you wanna tag along, I’ll follow them and you cover the door.” Tangerine suggested once again.
You furrowed your eyebrows, “You do understand what teamwork is, yes?”
He chuckled, “Yes, I go up there, shoot a few rounds, then we make a getaway.”
“Will you just trust me?”
“Your trust means nothing… I need to know you’re not going to fuck anything up. Just like in Paris.”
You smirked, “So you do have that against me.”
“Well, it’s not like it was your best. Leave me with a shot in the arm, Lemon on the ground and you, little miss greed, get away with your cash. If we all did this job for money, we wouldn’t be riskin’ our lives just runnin’ around killin’ or resucin’ people just for someone’s dime. You obviously do though.”
You narrowed your eyes, “You don’t know me…”
“Nor do you know me so…” He huffed, “Let’s just do what we have to do.”
There was tension between you, as if there was more fo a protective instinct than hate toward one another. You couldn't figure out Tangerine’s deal. Why was he so hostile toward you? Yes, what happened in Paris was fucked up, but he wasn’t the type to hold a grudge. He didn’t take shit from anyone, so why were you getting under his skin?
“Shit!” He grunted under his breath, seeing your target disappear into the hall.
The two of you hurry, yet still try to act casual to not raise eyebrows, and exit into the same hallway. As you push open the door, you hear the two talking in the stairwell before another door closes.
“You got your gun on you?” He asked as his hand slid into the back of his pants.
“Of course.” You scoffed, tearing up the slit in your dress. He saw the small pistol strapped to your thigh, making his mouth a bit dry.
He nodded, “Good…” 
Taking a quick breath, Tangerine opened the door. You slipped through and he followed behind, your backs facing one another as you scanned the hallway. It wasn’t narrow but if anyone slipped out of one of the rooms, they were right in your sights.
“I’ll take this one, you take that one.” He whispered, pointing his gun to the opposite door of his.
With your heart in your throat, you slowly crack the door open and don’t see anyone before a body flies from behind and slammed the door open from Tangerine’s side. The woman lied dead on the floor, blood all over his dress, and just as you turned around, a punch slid across your cheek. 
Instinctively, you ducked to dodge the second jab and swoop under to get on the other side of the man as Tangerine wrapped his arms around the guy to pull him to the ground.
Tan loudly grunted as he tried to gain control, basically attempting to straddle him in order to push his arm against his neck. Even with all his strength, the man gripped his hands around Tangerine’s arms to throw him off along with trying to push his knee between his crotch.
“Watch the door!” Tan directed to you. 
You nodded, catching your breath with your back against the wall by the door. The adrenaline ran through your veins and heard your heartbeat in your ears as one tear of blood dripped down your cheek. The crack of bones made you turn your head, seeing the man’s body go limp as Tan began to stand over him.
He quickly walked over the man, as if he was in the way, and comes to your side.
“He nicked you bad. Lemme see.” Tan said, your eyes meeting his as he held your cheek. The touch of his hand seemed to be some comfort, his thumb wiping the blood away and trying to see how bad the wound was.
“Bastard.” He muttered, “C’mon, let’s go before someone comes up.”
Without a word in, he grabbed your hand and dragged you behind his lead. You two headed for the exit door down the other side of the hall as you heard footsteps rumble from the other stairs you came up.
“Wait a minute.” Tan said, fiddling with his belt buckle.
Your eyes widen, “What on earth are you doing?”
He smirked, “Relax, darling. You flatter yourself too much.”
You rolled your eyes as the sound of his belt slid against the fabric of his belt loops before curling the leather strap around the door to keep it locked. The two of you fled down the stairs and suddenly found yourselves in the kitchen area. A few eyes followed as you both ran through, very obvious that you were running from something, but still aimed to get to some kind of exit.
With sudden luck, Tangerine saw his car across the street, instantly knowing which way he was supposed to go. Without skipping a beat, he grabbed your hand once more and the two of you ran across the street. Hopping into the passenger seat and Tan taking off was like a blur, just happening in seconds.
“Y/N?” Tan saying your name woke you from your trance.
“Huh?” You asked, shaking your head.
He quickly turned his head, “You alright?” He said with concern, one hand on the steering wheel and his foot easing off the gas.
“Y-Yeah, I’m okay. I don’t know what happened back there.” You trailed, a bit embarrassed. You were never one to let your guard down, well– enough to get hit right smack in the face.
“Are you sure?”
You turned your attention to him, “I’m fine, why wouldn’t I be?” You asked rhetorically.
“‘Cause of that big cut on your cheek.”
You narrowed your eyes, “Alright, what’s your big plan now, Einstein? Were just going to sleep in your car and hope we don’t wake up decapitated?”
He half-chuckled, “You truly think so little of me, don’t you?”
“Is that rhetorical?”
Tan rolled his blue eyes, “We’re goin’ somewhere safe.”
– – –
You wanted to believe you were strolling into some kind of trap. The lobby had a classic aesthetic to it, pale gold wallpaper and a wall of keys behind the person at the small front desk. You two placed your go-bags on the red carpeted ground as Tangerine checked into a room.
“Hello Mr. Tangerine.”
Oh, great. He’s some guest of honor here.
“‘Ello, Colin. My usual room.”
“Is that what you say in front of all the girls?” You tilted your head, standing behind him.
He rolled his eyes, “‘Cuse her.”
The man chuckled, crinkles by his eyes, “How many nights are you staying this time?”
This time. You could scoff out loud but you didn’t want to hear the tude from him.
“Just overnight. Nothin’ too serious.”
“Well, enjoy your stay, as always.” The man nodded before Tangerine thanked him.
The two of you head toward the old elevator, watching him quickly press the up button before you stand by his side. You half chuckled, “I’ve never seen you act so kindly toward anyone, tell me, does he see you bring girls through here all the time or-”
“Has anyone ever told you to shut your pie hole?”
“Hmm, not verbally. But, those eyes of your say enough for me… you’re too predictable, sometimes, Tan.”
He gave you a lingering look as the door opened, passing him into the elevator. The two of you make your way to the fifth floor and the hall is eerily quite for a hotel full of private contractors and assassins. You had your hands behind your back then patiently waited for Tangerine to jiggle the key into the lock, opening a door to a huge room with a surprisingly wide view.
“You’d think the curtains were closed.” You muttered as he walked over, closing them anyways.
Suddenly, he stripped from his suit jacket and you couldn’t help but see how tight his button up was around his biceps and chest.
“Did you get that a size too small?” You ask as you chunk your heels into the corner.
“Well, I certainly can’t kill fuckin’ bloaks wearing baggy clothes now.”
“But, you can in a three piece suit?” You cocked your eyebrow.
He licked his lips, “As if your dress is a flexible material.” Tangerine said as he pulled his rings off, placing them on the night stand.
“I can say the same for your pants.”
Tangerine wanted to look down but didn’t give into your comment. You place your bag down on the bed, grabbing your silk pajamas nearly folded on top and changed in the bathroom.
“God, just go to bed. We’ve got a long day tomorrow.” You somewhat groaned.
You sit on the top of the bed, unfolding the duvet before shoving it off to get underneath them.
Tangerine paused, “What the fuck do you you’re doin’?”
You furrowed your eyebrow, “This thing called going to sleep. Try it sometime, you’d be less grouchy.”
He rolled his eyes, “I know that, smartass, I mean what’re you doin’ in the bed that I’m goin’ to be sleepin’ in too?”
You rolled over, putting your weight on your elbows, “I know you’re dramatic but this takes the cake for top performances.”
He faked a laugh, “If you don’t get your ass out of that bed in two seconds, I’ll throw you in the tub with a pillow.”
“Oh, wouldn’t you like to. Fine, do it.” You said before laying flat into the mattress, staring straight at the ceiling.
He didn’t care for your equal amount of sarcasm, but he just gave you a cocked eyebrow.
“Okay, fine. I’d rather sleep on the floor anyways.” He said, stretching his arms up and behind his head. Your eyes quickly admired his muscles before turning back.
“Be my guest, princess.” You scoffed, slipping on your pajama shorts, “I’ll enjoy my big comfy bed.”
You pulled the heavy duvet over your waist, curling up with the dense pillow beneath your head. 
Tangerine stood there, biting the inside of his cheek as he watched you roll on your side. He tilted his head back before unbuttoning his shirt and tossing it on the desk chair. Although your eyes were closed, his side of the bed sunk in and you tried to hold back your smile at his faded stubbornness.
With your backs facing one another, you two just listened to the silence of the city. It gave you a moment to think of Paris– the last time you were with one another or much rather supposed to be against each other. You were a double agent, not exactly proud of it but you let greed take over your motivated justice. 
Having to scam Lemon and Tangerine wasn’t your finest hour either, you thought about it for months and finally coming face to face with Tangerine (out of the two, he wasn’t the one you would want to bump into again), all the guilt came rushing back like the snap of an elastic band.
– – –
The morning sun runs through the thin silk of the curtains, shining over your bodies in the bed. You wake up to the sound of light snoring, happy that you could sleep through it, and Tangerine in a deep slumber with his arm over the bed. He suddenly looked like innocence, so soft and tender, simply laying there like it was any other day.
You sit up, putting your hair out of your face then head to the bathroom. When you turn the light on, you’re almost surprised to see your reflection. Forgetting about the scar against your cheek, you look more rough around the edges. You sigh as you run your fingers over it, remembering the way Tangerine did last night.
After washing up, you go back out and Tangerine is now standing up and stretching his arms above his head. Your eyes quickly shift up his body, admiring the tattoos in their random places and how the band of his briefs rest on his hips. You sealed your lips from smiling at how sharp his v-line was accompanied by the happy trail disappearing into his pants.
“Sleep good with that stick in your ass?” You retort, passing him.
He rolled his eyes, “...You’re annoying, ya know that?”
“Oh, you’ve made that clear.” You mocked him as you closed the curtains more, “That’s why I love to do it.”
Tangerine flicked on the lamp, giving the room a warm glow.
“Alright, I say we lay low today. Better to be out of sight and–”
You cut him off, “Stuck in this room together?... are you trying to kill me t–”
He then put his hand over your mouth, looking deep into your eyes, “Yes, stuck in this room where we can keep an eye on each other and you can’t screw me over again.”
Your heart stopped for a split second, as if he couldn’t have been more of the controlling one. He took his hand away and you gulped, “Yep. Fine. Fair.”
Tangerine pressed his tongue against the inside of his cheek before you go to your bag in the chair that’s pushed in the corner of the room. You slightly bend over to look inside your duffle and his icy eyes can’t help but look up the back of your thighs and straight at your ass and lower back. How he could easily put his hands on your hips and make you hold onto something.
He shook his head, feeling like he was coming down with something to even imagine that thought.
You pulled out an old novel and sat yourself back on the bed, hoping that the hours would pass as you sank further into the broken-in mattress.
Tangerine sat down in the chair nudged into the corner, adjacent from your view, and he pulled out his gun that was conveniently tucked into the back of his pants.
“Are you actually holding me hostage?” You furrowed your brows, but didn’t take your eyes from your sentence.
“Whatever fantasy you’d like you believe.” He trailed, opening his gun and emptying his rounds into his palm.
– – –
Suddenly, you leaped out of a deep sleep. Your book laid open on your stomach while an extra pillow was between your legs. Your eyes fluttered open, thinking the past few days has been a dream, until you noticed Tangerine wasn’t sitting in the chair. You quickly looked around before hearing the bathroom door open and he stepped out, shirtless and in new dark slacks that rested on his hips.
Your mouth became dry. How could you dislike him so much yet here you are, ready to jump his bones as he crossed the room.
“What are you getting dressed for?” You asked, rubbing your eyes.
He half-chuckled at your groggy voice, “I want a drink.”
“Oh, like you’re not just going to abandon me here like I did you?... Where you go, I go.” You warned him.
He rolled his eyes, “Don’t be so dramatic.”
“A bit hypocritical coming from you.”
Tangerine just ignored your smart comment and opened the door, letting you through first before he followed. His eyes, once again, trace your lower back and trailed down your legs. His cheeks flushed pink as he quickly looked away, clearing his throat as he caught up to you so you two were walking side by side.
You pushed the faded down button as you pushed a big breath past your lips. Tangerine put his back against the wall and crossed his arms, his muscles basically restraining in his light button up. As you turned around, you rolled your eyes– but not at him, just at yourself. How could you have any little feeling for someone who also annoyed you to your core?
He took your silence as a bit of a tease. To be fair, you two didn’t really know one another. You met once before and then you simply betrayed him. Quickly, you were dead to him, but now you’re forced to be together and it raised an important question to himself too. Why was he helping someone who obviously can’t be trusted? 
Tangerine furrowed his eyebrows at that thought, knowing he would have thrown you to the wolves last night after you closed your eyes. He played with his watch a bit before the elevator dinged and caught both of your attentions.
After entering, the low-sounding shifting mechanics of the elevator were the only sounds between you two. You heard Tangerine sniffle, seeing him stretch his neck out of the corner of your eye, but you kept a straight view to the doors. While Tangerine thought you were continuing to give him the silent treatment, you were lost in your own thoughts of the past.
You flashbacked to your last night in Paris together, and remembered how the guilt creeped up on you knowing that, in a few hours, you’d have to betray both Lemon and Tangerine. Before knowing them, you didn’t care, but now that you’ve realized how hard you were falling for Tan, it felt like a double edged sword. If you didn’t do it, maybe you could stay with him– have a life together. But, if you went through with your selfish heist, you’d lose the guy who made you comfortable with being vulnerable after a long time. 
Obviously, you regretted your decision.
“Is this what you want?” You simply asked.
Tangerine quickly turned his head, “What?”
You rolled your eyes before facing his direction, “This.” You gestured between the two of you, “The weird animosity and constantly arguing and nit-picking?”
He never thought you’d be so bold to point it out, “I mean, we don’t like each other. Simple, isn’t it?”
“I guess…” You trailed, facing back toward the doors.
Tangerine licked his lips, wondering if he should utter the words on his tongue.
“...But, that doesn’t mean we can’t start over.”
You looked over your shoulder once more before turning around to him, “You mean that?”
He arched his eyebrow, “Should I regret it now?”
Just as the elevator dinged, the doors slowly opened and the hotel lobby appeared empty. You smirked to yourself, “Why don’t we catch up over that drink, huh?” You sort of teased– not sure if it had purpose.
– – –
Your drink tasted smooth, easily trailing down your throat as you leaned your head back to finish off the rest of the liquor in your glass. Once you tilted your head back straight, you were met with Tangerine’s signature eyebrow arch.
“Don’t worry, I’m paying for my own drinks.” You sighed, placing your glass back down on the wooden table top.
“As long as I don’t got to carry you back up to the room.” He sighed, sounding more defeated than witty, then his blue eyes glanced down then back into your eyes.
You hummed, running your finger along the rim of the empty glass. 
“‘right so, what’ve you been doin’ since we last…” He cleared his throat, “saw one other?”
You crossed your leg over the other, “Not much. Actually, it’s the first time I’ve been out for a while. After leaving you guys, I laid low in Tuscany.”
“For how long?”
You shrugged, “Five months? I was on the countryside and I wanted to be alone…” then, you smirked, “I heard that you were in Kyoto.” 
Tangerine could chuckle about it now, “For a bit. Had a job to do for some psychotic, fucked up family. The dad called in us, they were all turin’ on each other. Whole fuckin’ thing…”
“As in…” You trailed, “Against one another? The whole family?”
He just nodded before taking a sip of his drink.
You raised your eyebrows, “Wow… and you got out with no bruises or cuts? Bullet holes?”
Tangerine licked his lips before he presented the side of his neck, lighter skin over his tanner tone to show the scar. You carefully reached out, brushing your fingers against it which made a tingle go up his spine. You sit back down as he turned back in his chair, and he seemed to tense up.
“Amazing you survived it.” You sealed your lips.
He crossed his arms, “I supposed…”
A comfortable silent fell between you, the light, jazz music playing at a low, and Tangerine’s eyes trailed up the side of your bare leg. He didn’t mean to stare this much, but he felt more vulnerable than usual. One thing you knew is that Tangerine was a layered person, you had to take time to get to the center of him and realize he’s not so cold once you get to know him.
“Five months in Tuscany, I bet that was lovely.”
“Not really. I isolated the whole time… I wanted to be by myself, but I felt bad about what happened… what I did in Paris.” You admitted, but didn’t look into his eyes, fearing that he would turn on you in a second.
Tangerine sighed, “You had to do your job, we did ours… that’s ‘bout all that can be said.” 
Assuming from the lack of eye contact and his tone, he seemed hurt too. You could easily let it boost your ego, but, you actually felt a relief. This hatred you’ve held against each other has finally come down and even though it wasn’t actually said, both of you can feel hostility leave the room.
You bit the inside of your cheek, “Remember, we’re starting over. Clean slate. I hope I’m making a good impression so far.” You raised your eyebrows, lifting your glass again just to drink the mixture of watered down liquor. 
He chuckled, “You’re just lovely.”
The comment made your face get hot. You blame the accent and how it can just get under your skin.
“I don’t think you’ve ever called me something so nice.”
Tangerine smirked, “Funny since we’ve just met, darling.”
Darling.
It was the first time you heard it as a term of endearment then pure spite.
You rolled your eyes, but you could humor that Tangerine was going along with it. This new cheeky side of him was something you didn’t think existed– maybe it was the liquor talking, but you hoped it wasn’t just that simple.
“So, what brings you here?” You continued to tease, placing your elbows on the table, “Business… or pleasure?” Your hand laid on top of his, brushing your fingertips along the chunky rings that perfectly fit his fingers.
Multiples thoughts sounded through both your minds.
“Maybe it’s the liquor.” “Maybe we’re a little over our heads.” “Maybe we’re bored.”
But, Tangerine held your hand on top of the table, gently holding it as his thumb grazes over your knuckles.
“Depends…” He trailed, now leaning in too, “What are you here for?”
– – –
In just a few minutes, you two were back in the room you felt trapped in for hours.
Tangerine pressed your back against the wall, a tingle running up your spine from the coolness of the wallpaper. Your lips pressed together over and over, tilting your head before biting his bottom lip. He effortlessly lifted you up with his hand under the back of your thighs, and your ankles meet around his back.
He needed so bad, desperate even… and the feeling was mutual.
He put you down on your feet again, pressing a kiss against your scarred cheek then another on your jaw. His light kisses run down the middle of your breasts as his hand lifted up the end of your skirt. You pushed your hips out as your back was against the wall still, watching him pull down your panties in an instant. You kick them to the side and Tangerine placed your leg over his shoulder, kisses along your inner thigh and your hand ran through the front of his curls.
Suddenly, his tongue ran over your swollen clit before sucking on it. With one hand in his hair, the other caressing your breast and running your thumb over your nipple.
Tangerine panted, moving his hand against your pussy lips. He pushed them apart, showing your tight hole and how you clench around nothing. He lowly groaned, running his fingers over your clit before sliding his two fingers into your pussy. You bite your bottom lip to hold back the moan stuck in your throat, watching him suck your clit and finger you at the same time.
Just as your climax neared, he felt your cunt tighten around his fingers. He couldn’t end it like this so, he took them away. You let your leg down, watching him come back up and tower over you.
“If I’m goin’ to make you cum…” He sighed, “I’m gonna be deep inside you when you fucking crumble.” He said so low before pressing his fingers against your tongue, and you tasted yourself.
You pulled his hand back, running your thumbs over his tattooed hand.
“Not if I make you cum first.” You trailed, moving his hand down so you could kiss him.
He could drop to his knees in an instant, but Tangerine surprisingly kept his composure. 
You smirked as you pushed him toward the bed, the back of his knees hitting it to make him sit down. As you stood in front of him, he leaned on his elbows as he watched your dress drop to the floor. It pooled at your ankles and when his eyes shifted back up, so glossed over, your bare body was the center of his attention.
“Hmm, I don’t think you’ll last.” You taunted.
As much as he could snap back, you straddled him and pulled apart his tightly buttoned shirt. Your hands ran over his toned and tatted chest before reaching down to his pants, unzipping the fly and he shuffled a bit to shift them off his hips. His cock was hard, restrained from his boxers and you felt flattered.
You giggled, leaning forward to share a slow kiss with him. Your bare pussy rubbed against his cock as you moved closer to him. A low groan mumbled between your makeout, and you pushed him back so you two both fell on the bed.
Your hands pressed into each side of the mattress, gaining strength to help yourself grind against his hard. His big hands tightly held your hips as you continued your smooth momentum, whimpering at your clit being rubbed by your harsh grind.
As heat rose in the room, your right hand dipped between the two of you, and ran over his hard cock once more. Tan’s lips now desperately met your jaw before taking a light bite at your neck. The feeling of your hand caressing through his boxers could make him release right there.
Becoming more impatient, you finally pushed your hand into the band of his boxers and he once more moved his hips to shift out of them. 
“Fuck, your cock is so big… can barely hold it with my hand. God, I want you to stretch me out…” You moaned, “Is that okay?”
You purposefully let him believe that he was in charge, and you were falling into the submissive role. Tangerine gained a bit of confidence from your desperate comments, and he sat more up on the bed.
“Fucking christ…” Is all he could say.
He moved the swollen and red tip against your wet slit, also aching and needing your walls to wrap around him now. At first there was pressure, pushing the tip inside your hole then slowly guiding your hips down to completely take in every inch of his cock. 
Once he bottomed out, your body lightly shook as your lips brushed against his. He was fully inside you, the tight and warm feeling making him wither beneath you.
Tangerine moved his hand, kissing your shoulder, “God, you feel like fuckin’ heaven.”
“Don’t stop. Please…” You huffed.
– – –
Then, it was morning. 
The rising sun peaked through the small split of the curtains. As you tried to shift, your body ached throughout every muscle. A small groan left your lips, but you were pulled back by a strong arm wrapped around your waist.
It snapped you back into reality. Last night really happened… and you were okay with that.
Tangerine’s tattooed arm unconsciously tightened around you, holding you close still as he still slept behind you. You barely look over your shoulder and saw his face, his eyes still shut and his curls looked wild.
You faintly smile as you turn around to face him, and that’s what woke him up. He pulled his arms back and rubbed his eyes from the brightness of the sun coming in. You run your finger along a curl on his forehead, pushing it to the top of his head and your heart melted from the sight of those blue eyes.
“Did last night really happen?” You mumbled, but with a faint smile on your lips.
He placed his hand gently on your cheek, caressing his thumb against your jaw. 
“I think the real question is…” He trailed, “Do we stay another night or go back to pretending to not know each other's existences?”
You bit your bottom lip, lightly giggling, “I think we pick secret option three and go somewhere else. Get away for a while… see where this is going. Don’t you?”
Just at that moment, Tangerine’s phone vibrated in his pants that were on the floor next to the bed. He turned over on his other side, reaching down to pull it out and reading a text Lemon just sent.
“Got a call about a job in Budapest. Are you in or overstaying your weekend?”
Tangerine smirked at himself, then felt your lips press against his neck. You placed another kiss on his shoulder, leaving a tender love bite before he turned back around to kiss you. Maybe it was the natural thrill of the chase, but you loved the not knowing. 
Whatever was next, you could only hope that he kept it interesting.
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second, never first
part twelve | part one | part two | part three | part four | part five | part six | part seven | part eight | part nine | part ten | part eleven
chris x fem!reader
summary - you grew up hating one guy all of high school but suddenly become friends, but as time goes on feelings develop, only its one sided.
warnings - swearing, kissing, use of y/n, mention of family issues , BOYS (no smut… for now lol)
word count - 1.5k
NOT PROOFREAD
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y/ns pov
i woke up and immediately smiled at the scent of chris filling up my nose. we didnt move once throughout the night, i was laying face down on top of him with my arms wrapped around his neck and my head in his shoulder. his arms rested around my waist with one under his hoodie on my back.
i take time to soak in this moment and nuzzle my head father into his neck. feeling his breathing under me and hearing the low hum of the show he had playing. i knew it was way too early to be awake since it was still pitch black outside.
i lift my head lightly to look around and suddenly have to pee.
i gently removed myself from his grasp and lift myself off the bed. while being careful to get off the bed my attempt is failed when i see his eyes squint at me getting up. “is everything ok?” he mumbles, “um yeah i just have to pee.” i respond hovering over him. he hums and rolls over on his side, i grab my phone from my bag and walk to the bathroom.
once i finish up i walk back to his room but stop once i reach the door. i check my phone for the time, 3:46am. i sigh and lightly push open the door softly closing it behind me.
i softly get back into bed and see chris with his eyes open “come back.” he mumbles putting his hand on my thigh. i flinch at his cold hand and slide down under the covers. he wraps his arm around my waist as we revert back to me laying on him. my head on his chest this time. i look up at him, “do you think everything will be ok when i go home?” i ask and his eyes sadden, “try not to think about that right now.” he says looking down at me. he strokes my head and a sigh putting my face on his chest again.
i clutch on to his shoulders and bring my face up to his and put my hand on his cheek. “i know i probably already said this but im extremely grateful for you, i dont know what i would have done tonight if it werent for you.” i smile. he smiles back and wraps his arms around me tighter placing a kiss on the top of my head. “lets go back to bed we still have school tomorrow kid.” he whispers, i nod in response and lay my head down closing my eyes that still felt like they were burning due to how much i cried tonight.
he moves his hand under my hoodie again but places it on my waist and the other under by body as we drift off to sleep again.
-
waking up again to chris’ alarm he had set i jolt up and turn it off. i sit up beside him and rub my eyes. somehow chris slept through it so i gently shake his shoulder and he squints up at me. “what wrong?” he questions. “we have school.” i frown, he nods and rests his head on my thigh. “you big baby we need to get up.” i chuckle and he groans. “why cant we lay here forever.” he whines, “come on we need education.”
we both brush our tetth and i finally look in the mirror at my puffy face. splashing cold water on my face to try and get rid of it. “fuck i look like im stoned right now.” i say walking back into chris’ room, he chuckles as he puts his shirt on and shaking out his hair.
“can you turn around for a second?” i say. he nods and i put on a pair of leggings from the bag i brought over and just decide on wearing chris’ hoodie as it is super comfortable. i brush my hair and put on my school bag and we make our way out.
chris’ pov
shes happier this morning, im glad. she didnt mention her parents all morning minus when she woke up in the middle of the night. i want to get more out of her about the situation but its not my business to pry on. if she wants to tell me she will.
i sit in the drivers seat and she sits with her knees up and she rests her chin on her knees as i drive. she decided on wearing my hoodie to school ‘since it felt like a blanket’. i love it. i wish she would replace her wardrobe with my own.
she catches me starring at her, “eyes on the road driver.” she smiles pushing my face back on to the road and i laugh. “you ok?” i ask, “mhm” she replies looking straight ahead out of the window. “kid if your not we can not go or i can bring you back to my house.”
“no no, i have to just go back to normal life. cant be running scared of whats going on at home if im not there.” she breathes.
i nod and smile at her, “do you um- think you could let me sleepover again tonight. i know we dont have school tomorrow so its kind of inconvenient but-“ i cut her off, “of course kid dont worry about it.”
we continue the drive to school and i cant help but steal glances at her. the way the white snowy atmosphere lights up everything about her, even in sadness she is still the most beautiful thing ever. she doesnt deserve what shes going through. i wish i could take it all away, but of course that isnt an option.
y/ns pov
i walked through the school halls as if i was a zombie without chris. sitting through each class felt like a ticking time bomb. my mind was just racing with what could possibly be happening at home. as much as i wanted to go and see if my mom was ok i couldnt bear to see that she wasnt. in my mind what i dont know wont hurt me. im choosing to believe it wasnt real.
last night didnt happen and i just had a sleepover with chris because we are good friends who for some reason cuddle before bed?
ugh this wasnt going to work if i keep doubting myself.
the class bell goes off and i finally get to go home, or chris’ home.
i walk up to his car and wait for him to come so i dont freeze to death outside. boston winters were not for the weak. the brisk air entering my nose and practically freezing the inside as i wait.
i see anna and all of her friends giggling and starring at me as i wait for chris. i could actually give a fuck what they think about me right now. she is my smallest priority and to be honest convincing people that me and chris were dating was getting so easy to the point where i almost forget we are pretending.
my thoughts come to a halt as i see blue eyes and long brown hair walking up to me.
chris walks over and kisses me grabbing either side of my face and i move me hands to cover his. “sorry i took so long i was just talking to matt, him and nick want to go out to eat after school.” he breathes pulling away. there it is again, the world stopped spinning again.
“i have no money, my wallet is actually the one thing i forgot at home.” i mumble looking at the ground. “my treat, girlfriend.” he says emphasizing ‘girlfriend’.
his words make me blush and he places another kiss to my forehead before walking over the the drivers side of the car.
we meet up with matt and nick at the restaurant and get a table for four. then the questions started.
“what did you guys do last night?”
“is everything ok?”
“are you guys actually dating now?”
“why did you have to sleepover last night?”
i open my mouth to answer each question but every time i do one of them ask another question. “can you two fuck off for a second. she is just dealing with stuff she doesnt need you two giving her shit for no reason.” chris defends. “no its ok.” i reassure him.
“you guys are like basically my only friends so i guess it would only be right if i told you.” i begin. matt and nick stay attentive as i explain, “my family life is just not great and last night it got to a point where i couldnt be there anymore so i asked chris to come get me.”
“thats it?” nick huffs, i raise my eyebrows in confusion. “i really thought you guys were actually dating now i mean its all chris talks ab-“ hes cut off by chris kicking him under the table. “ow what the fuck!” nick exclaims as we all giggle. not chris though, be is starring daggers into nicks head. “i do hope your doing ok though, all three of us are here to talk if you need it.” matt smiles at me. i nod and feel chris’ hand go over mine under the table.
-
thanks for reading xx
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