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yangbbokari · 7 months

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Skz making a bet on you Hyung line pt.2

Pairing: OT8 SKZ x f!Reader

Genre, AU: angst ofc, lovers to exes!AU

Warnings: cursing, mentions of cheating, many mentions of insecurities. I think that abt it

Summary: you happened to learn one day that the never really loved you and only made a bet with the other members to see if you would fall in love with them

A.N: Not proof read at all and this is the hyung line pt.2 to the previous one. Maknae Line pt.2 is coming soon

Parts: Hyung Line Pt.1 Maknae Line

BANG CHAN He didn't even notice you were gone until his call ended. Going around the house, he called your name multiple times. When he got no reply, he assumed you went on a grocery trip. So, he took his time to shower, get dressed and get ready for bed. Before he knew it, he drifted off to sleep.

Chan hated waking up cold. You weren't there beside him. He'd gotten used to always holding you through out these 7 years. He grabbed his phone off the night stand and checked the time. It was already 6:57 in the morning. Not hearing from you at all left him with a bad feeling in the pit of his stomach.

So he immediately dialed your number. It rang once. Then twice. Then three times. You never let it ring more than two times so why weren't you answering? Finally, it went to voicemail. He called a couple more times just for all of them to go to voicemail. He started panicking. It was unusual of you to not pick up his calls unless something went wrong. One more time, just calling you one more time to make sure.

You woke up to the sound of your phone buzzing uncontrollably. Rubbing your droopy eyes, you took your phone and answered it. “Hello?” You groggily said.

“Y-y/n? Where are you? Why weren’t you picking up my calls!? Hello? Y/n?”

The moment you hear his voice, the sleepiness left your body. You stayed silent because you were sure that you’d burst into anger and most likely tears if you tried to talk to him.

“Y/n? Why aren’t you answering me? I-I-I’m worried… Please just say something. You’re scaring me…”

You sat up in bed, holding the phone close to your ear. After clearing your throat you finally answered him.

“What do you want?” You were right. You were a little too irritated the moment you started talking to him.

“What do I want…? What do you mean!? I’m worried sick right now because you weren’t picking up my calls and you didn’t even come home last night. You could’ve at least texted me something, y/n. Don’t just leave me guessing of all the possibilities that could’ve happened to you!” He was practically yelling into the phone at this point and it only made you angrier.

“Well, I’m sorry I’m not being the toy who sees you as their protector and is so incredibly annoying that you can’t say it to her and instead to your fucking friends!”

Chan was speechless for a few minutes before speaking up again. “What..?” He said almost breathlessly.

“I heard that phone call you were on.” You began sniffling and the tears began to fall. “You said that you had fun… fun playing with my feelings and making me believe that you were my protector an-an-and how annoying I was…” You could hear him sighing on the other end and you began to think that he was going to agree with you but he didn’t.

“No… no, Baby, you got it all wrong. I-I shouldn’t have worded it like that.” He sighed once more. “I was talking about when I pranked you earlier this week. When I pretended that I was dead when you tried to wake me up. And then you began crying telling me how much you loved me.”

As he told you about it, you began to remember. Why were you so stupid? You began grabbing your things and walking to the shared apartment, all while listening to his explanation.

“Now there’s nothing I can say about the annoying part. But I did say that because—. Wait, you didn’t hear me tell him— never mind. What I’m saying is that I started the sentence like that because I was saying that it just made me realize all the more how much I loved you no matter how hard it got between us. Because I know these small fights we have between each other and how mad we can get and how petty the arguments are. I just love you so much and the way you cried over me broke my heart. You’re everything I could ever possibly ask for and I’m just so gra—”

He turned his head and saw you standing in the doorway of the bedroom looking an absolute mess. He hadn’t heard when you came in since he was so busy talking to you.

“When’d you get here..?” Chan stood up and made his way over to you to make sure you were alright as he checked around your body. He had tears in his eyes. You couldn’t help but stare at your boyfriend’s face in awe.

“I-I-I-I thought you didn’t love me and I got scared. S-so I left but now everything is making sense and I feel so stupid. I’m so stupid. I shouldn’t have—”

Chan took you into his arms, muffling your words. “Don’t say that. You have every right to think that way especially from what you heard. But don’t worry. I love you more than words can express.” The two of you cried into the comfort of each others arms and you’ve never felt better.

After tears were dried and things were dealt, Chan looked at you curiously. It made you a bit flustered. “Wh-why are you staring at me like that. Want to take your words back now?”

“No! I’m just wondering… how’d you get here so fast?”

“I-I-I was at my friend’s apartment. It’s a floor above us.”

He took you into his arms once again, chuckling. “God, I want to marry you.” All you could do was blush. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ LEE MINHO The next day, Minho ran up to you and swung an arm around your neck. You were quick to push it off. He frowned and made a little pouting face.

"What's wrong? Why did you leave without me last night?"

You quickly answered each of his questions. Not wanting to be in his presence much longer. "Nothing. Something came up." You rushed past him and to class. Finals were just around the corner and you didn't have time to be dealing with someone like him.

This was your last year of school. You didn’t want the unwanted drama. You’ve sailed through school as a well-natured person, favored by the teacher’s. You didn’t want to ruin your reputation now.

But it wasn’t as easy as you thought. Minho would continue to bug you in each and every class. No matter what you were doing he was there. Constantly pushing him away wasn’t working and ignoring him CLEARLY wasn’t working. So you resulted to the only thing you had left, confrontation.

Without second thought, you went straight to him after school and kicked him in the shin.

“Ow! Who the fuck!” He quickly turned around to face you as his demeanor slowly changed. “O-oh, y/n… It’s you.” He sounded kind of disappointed if you were being completely honest.

“What did you do that for, Sweetheart?”

You rolled your eyes and stormed off. Leaving him to chase after you.

"Woah, woah, woah, hey..." He grabbed you by the wrist and spun you around. "What's the matter?"

He was the most disgusting human being on this planet and you didn't want anything to do with it. It made you extremely irrtated and you didn't want to be there. If anything, his act he was putting up was probably all a part of that sick and disgusting, "joke," as they called it.

"We'll talk about it tomorrow."

That was all you said before finally getting in your car and driving home. You hated that you were such a pushover. You hated that no one coud truly accept you for you. You hated that you were so stupid. You hated that you were so blind. You hated yourself.

You pondered over the entire weekend. Highschool's almost over. It didn't matter now. But to you, it did matter. You weren't going to just let people treat you like trash anymore. You knew just what to do.

On Monday, you came in as a fresh new person. Both physical wise and mental wise. You weren't gonna let people fuck with you anymore. You spent the whole weekend researching on makeup. You already knew lots about fashion. Your closet was already filled with fashionable items, you just weren't sure when to wear them.

With some accents to your school uniform, you looked perfect. Now the problem was the makeup. This wasn't your forte. You've never really used makeup so it was a struggle. But with enough practice, it was almost perfect. Even though it was a struggle, your makeup came out just fine.

When walking in, you could feel the eyes that followed you. It made you super uncomfortable. Maybe you did your makeup wrong and looked like a clown instead of what you intended. Your anxiety quickly built up and you ran for the bathroom. On the way there, you bumped into a wall. Well, a body rather.

The boy gently pushed your body off of his and you were quite dissapointed with the boy you were faced with. It was Minho.

"Woah... miss, are you okay? You should watch where you're going. You're too pretty to be hurt. Are you new here?"

All you could do was scoff. People were staring because you all of a sudden looked beautiful in other's eyes. Even Minho couldn't recognize you.

"It's me, Dipshit."

"Y-y/n?"

You rolled your eyes and kicked him in his balls before leaving the scene. That was the best feeling in your life. Two less problems to deal with. Minho and the judgement of society. Fuck the rest. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ SEO CHANGBIN You kept crying throughout the night. It shouldn't hurt this much but you couldn't help the tears from falling. At about 9pm, Changbin knocked on the door.

"Y/n..? I know you're upset with me but please come eat dinner. Please?"

When you didn't reply, you could hear him sigh. It's not that you didn't want to talk to him and that you were ignoring him. It was just that you weren't sure if your mental state could handle that right now. You didn't want to just lash out at him.

There was some clinking and clanking in the kitchen before you heard the front door shut. It made you want to cry even harder. But you were sure that any other girl would do better for him. Than the one who currently had her back against the door as she cried.

You slowly got up and opened the door to see if he really left. It kind of broke your heart but what else could you really do in this situation? You made your way to the couch and sat down, holding your knees close to your chest. The tears were unstoppable and kept coming. It wasn't like you wanted them to, it's just you didn't know how to stop them.

As you were drowning in you sorrows, you heard the front door open. Immediately, your head shot up only to see Changbin standing there with a guilty look and a bouquet of flowers. He stood there frozen in his place.

"Baby, why are you still u-"

"Where were you?" You interceded.

Taking a quick glance between you and the door, he pointed towards it.

"I figured that you'd need space so I went out. Then I realized that you might think something bad about it. Like I'm leaving you or something. So I went to grab some gifts and come back home. So that I can beg you to take me back if you decided to break up with me. If you didn't take me back then I wo-"

At this point, Chanbin was just rambling on and on. You could see how sorry he was and it made you feel like you were a fool. So you ran to him and wrapped your arms around his frame. You cried into his chest not knowing what else you could do.

Changbin was a little to stunned to move or speak for a minute. But he slowly embraced you after setting the roses down.

"Baby... I thought you'd be mad at me." He cautiously stated.

Your lower lip quivered as you replied to him. "I-I am! But just a little bit. I'd rather have you by my side than lose you forever over something silly. Plus it happened in the past and you told me yourself. S-so I guess it makes it a better..."

And at that, Changbin holds you even tighter and lets out a sigh of relief. "I thought I would lose you forever over a mistake, in the past, I made. Thank you for forgiving me." He pressed a soft kiss on your forehead. But you shook your head.

"No, thank you for loving me." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ HWANG HYUNJIN After running for a while, you slowed down and began walking. You went to the Han River and took a seat on one of the benches. Checking your phone, to see the battery life was out and decided to take the time to relax. A lot had already been going on in your life. You had just found out that your mother was sick and you didn't want to tell Hyunjin because that would make him worry. You got reprimanded at work for getting an order wrong. Nearly fired because you "didn't know how to do your job right."

It was a stressful day and you just hoped that movie night would make it better. Except it didn't. It made it worse.

Having to find out from Jisung instead of Hyunjin himself really hurt. You knew that Hyunjin would tell you when he was ready. But, you couldn't shake off the feeling that he never liked you, let alone love you, to begin with.

You also knew that Hyunjin loved you and you were just overthinking. But were you? The river was peaceful as is and you didn't want to face reality right now so that's where you stayed.

It wasn't until nearly midnight, did you return home. Upon entering your apartment, you were met with a very distraught Hyunjin. He looked freaked out about something. But as soon as he saw you, he took you into his arms, tightly. He sobbed out onto your shoulder as he said, "thank you," over and over again.

"H-hyunnie..? What's wrong?" You ask worriedly. Yes, you were upset. But seeing him like this did something to you.

"I thought- I thought that something happened to you. You weren't picking up your calls or replying to my messages so I told the boys and other friends we both knew to contact you too, figuring you didn't want to talk to me of all people. B-but then they all said they couldn't reach you either. So I came to your apartment and when you weren't here I got absolutely terrified. What if you didn't make it home? What if you got hurt. What if you got KIDNAPPED!? And that would all happen because I was too stupid to admit the truth. Because I made you angry. Because I made the one person I promised not to hurt, hurt so badly. A-a-a-a-an-and-"

He was terribly hyperventilating at this point so you grabbed his face and kissed him. He immediately softened into the kiss. His breathing got slower and his body began to slump.

You slowly pulled away and gazed into his eyes as you started consoling him.

"Hyunnie... my phone died and I stayed by the Han River. I did not get hurt or kidnapped as you can see. Since, I'm standing right in front of you right now. If anything did happen, I would never let you blame yourself because it wouldn't be your fault. Besides, I love you and I wouldn't want you to live with that."

His teary eyes looked into yours as his lips formed a soft pout. "You still love me?"

"Of course I do. Even if you made a bet on me."

It made him cry even more at the fact that you still had this much trust in him.

"I love you too."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Taglist: @123rinu @pgnwook @mixtape-racha @hannieslovebot @lolareadsimagines @garrixer-06 @bandolls @chansbabygirlsstuff @camilagonzalex @mariteez @beccaskz @kibs-and-bits @kaitchan

@lynlyndoll @bangchansslut6 @hanniemylovelyquokka @changbinsjuicybiceps @xx-twalia-xx @bangchansprettygf @lvlnijiro @totallynotlyntv @htnw004 @shecheatedwithme @jiisungllvr @neteyamsmate4life @yoongles2025 @cosniffee @gdaymates @iilliess @tadashisdisaster sry if I missed u on the taglist

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yeahspider · 8 months

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hotline 🕸️

Ve’s note - skz hyung line as voicemails they leave you . kinda angsty kinda fluffy . never done a format like this so bare with me . maknae line eventually i promise . this is sfw basically . not proofread ofc . enjoy !! <3

bang chan

babe i know it’s late and you’re probably not awake …. at least i hope not but i just wanted to call and let you know that i love you . i know i don’t say it often as i should . i’m sorry . i’m sorry i’m always away from you . i’m sorry i’m always at work . you mean the world to me and i never want you to think anything different . i love you . forever . anyways i’ll call you in the morning . i promise . goodnight .

lee know

fuck- i didn’t realize it was so late over there . i know i promised to call earlier and i’m sorry i didn’t . you didn’t answer so you’re either angry and ignoring me or you’re asleep . if you’re asleep i hope it’s peaceful . i know you get worried when i don’t call . it’s just tour is so stressful and i’ve been so busy ….wait i know that’s not an excuse . i’ll make it up to you as soon as im home . i promise . and i mean it . sleep well my love .

seo changbin

i know you’re upset . don’t go to bed angry it’s not good for you . call me back . please babe . i would like to apologize to you and not your voicemail . i know i’ve been distant lately and i know it’s causing a strain . but we can make it through anything . a few more days and i’ll be home and all yours . we can go to all your favorite places and i’ll pay for all . i’ll take care of you . just don’t shut me out . don’t forget to drink a glass of water before bed and to take your medicine in the morning . it’s on the bedside table . i love you . call me back when you get this .

hwang hyunjin

my light please pick up . why arent you answering ? i can tell you’re upset and it’s breaking my heart . let me fix it . let me apologize a thousand times over for making you feel anything other than happiness . just talk to me okay ? you can yell at me if that helps i just need to hear your voice . i’m almost home to you . i can’t wait to hold you in my arms again . there’s this song i’ve been meaning to show you . it’s just a draft but i wrote it for you . i know that won’t make up for anything but it’s just another show of my devotion to you . to us . to our love . just hold on i’m coming home . i love you .

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charmercharm3r · 1 year

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Study Buddy

SCB

Masterlist

word count: 1.7k

Synopsis: Changbin gives you a helping hand for your studies.

warnings: smut, sexual explicit content, softdom!changbin, oral (f receiving), praise, slight edging, brief pussy slapping

Changbin was home by 5:30 p.m. for the first time in what felt like ages. His being home meant he finally got to cook you dinner, cuddle on the couch, maybe run you both a bath and be in bed by eleven. He was washing the vegetables when he heard a thump coming from the dining table, followed by a pained groan.

“Baby?” He called out, quickly washing his hands and setting aside the dinner task in lieu of checking on you. You’d warned him when he got home that you were neck deep in homework, finals were just around the corner and you planned to burn the knowledge into your brain. It had been hours since you set up camp at the dining table, where you usually did when Changbin wasn’t home. It’s been a while since he’s been home early enough to catch you studying, usually voicing that when he was here, you wanted all of your attention to be on him. With such limited time together, Changbin didn’t bother protesting.

Rounding the corner, Changbin found you with your forehead planted against the plane of the table, body looking entirely too limp for the amount of empty energy drinks scattered around. He laughed to himself at the scene in front of him, unable to help snapping a quick picture of you in this disheveled state. After all, it was the domesticity he lacked in his glamorous life. With you, that’s all he felt, at home.

“Are you okay?” Hints of giggles lingered in his tone. You turned your head in his direction, cheek squished against the wood.

“I can’t feel my brain.”

Changbin skipped over to you and pulled out the closest seat, scooting the chair even closer. There were textbooks and notes spread all around, nowhere to put anything down that wasn’t school related. “Is that why you hit your head so hard I heard it from the next room?” Your weak attempt to nod made him smile again and plant a sweet kiss to your temple. “Oh, don’t do that, baby. You’ll hurt your pretty head and even prettier brain.”

A hand raked softly through your hair, your eyes fluttering closed at the feeling. Even when you were overwhelmed and exhausted, Changbin’s presence was always soothing. You groaned again when he stopped and let you sit up.

“I took so many notes and still don’t understand. I even made flashcards as if that would help.” You rolled your head around to stretch your neck, eyes closing momentarily.

“You’ve been sitting here for hours. Let me help,” Changbin stood, walking behind you and feeling his big hands slide up your shoulders. You instantly relaxed into his touch, almost melting upon his body radiating heat like a furnace. “What are you stuck on?”

The question almost didn’t register, too lost in the way his thumbs now massaged the knots in your neck. “Theories of first language acquisition.”

“What’s the first theory you remember?”

“Um– oh, oh.” Lips attached to the junction of your shoulder, lightly, slowly making its way up your neck.

“Answer, baby,” he mumbled against your skin. The smallest of touches had your mind going foggy, distracting from the work in front of you.

“Erm– m– mediation theory.”

Hand coming around to cup your face, Changbin knelt at your side and kissed you gently, briefly. He barely allowed you to fully fall into it before pulling your chair back and crawling under the table. While he did, he laid more kisses to the expanse of your legs, thighs, wherever skin was exposed. You suddenly regret putting on the shorts knowing with your boyfriend home, they’d be off soon enough.

Except he stopped upon coming face to face with your core, smirking to himself as he watched you scoot forward and spread your legs more. “Tell me about it.” Changbin grazed his fingers over the inside of your thigh, drawing gentle shapes and slowly coming closer to where you wanted him most.

“It’s, um…” Your mind genuinely couldn’t think of an answer.

At your pause, Changbin peaked his head out from under the table, “I don’t wanna stop, baby. But if you can’t answer then I’m gonna have to.” The sudden fear of the loss of his touch made your eyes grow wide, shaking your head no. He grinned, ducking between your legs again. “Continue.”

“Mediation theory,” the same gentle fingers traced the outline of your cunt through your shorts, feeling a gush of arousal seep through. Just as the tip of his finger ran over the sensitive bundle of nerves, your entire body shivered. A teasing laugh sounded from beneath the table. With a shaky voice, you answered, “s– self stimulating response t–to a word or sentence.” It came out in one rushed breath.

With a satisfied hum, Changbin leaned in and ran his tongue over your clothed pussy, faintly tasting your essence. You moaned out, throat suddenly dry. Reaching under to grab at his hair, Changbin gently swatted your hands away. “No touching. Focus on your studies, baby.”

“How am I supposed to focus with your head between my legs?” It was a legit question, one that made Changbin evilly chuckle knowing what he wanted from you was going to be impossible.

“Because if you don’t, I’m going to leave you here high and dry. And I really, really don’t wanna do that. Think of every step closer as a reward.”

“A reward?” The word made your thighs clench around his head. In normal settings, Changbin would gladly take it. But right now, he wanted to push you a bit. It took a little bit of force to get your thighs to release him, but bit a loving and proud mark into the flesh all the same.

“Only if you can answer my questions. Remember, we’re studying.”

“Mhm, mhm. Sure. Studying.” You guided his head back to wear it was before, right before your throbbing core.

A pleased sigh, he continued his mission. “Tell me about another theory.”

Changbin poked his tongue out, drawing tight circles to your clit. He was only in this position for maybe five minutes and you were already soaked. Curiosity got the best of him, pulling the garment to the side to reveal your bare, dripping pussy. A short laugh fanned his breath over your sensitive nerves, another shiver rippling through your body.

The tip of his finger slicked through your folds, he hummed to get your attention back on track. “Behavioralism supports ch– children being born with no p– preconceived notions.”

He quickly flattened his tongue over your cunt, taking long licks and circling your entrance. A hum of approval made you whimper. “Another,” he demanded.

“Constructivism combats that by saying children are born with innate–” two large fingers pressed into your hole, cutting off your sentence entirely and sucking in a deep breath. “Oh, fuck.”

Changbin instantly stopped, stilling his motions and looking up at you through his lashes. “If you stop again, so will I.”

“No, no! Please don’t! I know this, I promise. Just please, don’t stop.” He happily chuckled, mostly at how desperate you already were. He couldn’t blame you, though. Changbin could feel his own dick throbbing to the point of almost painful, so incredibly turned on by how well you were doing for him.

Taking his position again, Changbin began to move his fingers again, slowly fucking them in and out while simultaneously lapping at your clit like a dog. It was almost too much, yet not enough at the same time. Yet, your head was falling closer to empty with every passing second.

“Constructivism.” He demanded louder against your cunt.

“Born with innate knowledge a– and learn to function through in– interaction.”

He took your clit between his lips and sucked hard, drawing a loud moan. Popping off for a moment, “good girl. Good fucking girl,” and went to town. The slurping noises bouncing off the walls was obscene, borderline pornographic when paired with your cries of pleasure. It was almost as though Changbin could feel how good you felt, his own noises muffled by your pussy almost just as loud.

The build up felt like it had been happening forever. That, or you were so worked up and sensitive that you felt like coming in mere minutes. Moreso, the latter.

“Gonna– gonna cum–”

“Hold it,” he ordered, slowing his fingers and going back to rubbing figure eights with his tongue. “One more question and you’ll get your reward.”

You trusted him with your life, but you were starting to think he wasn’t going to give it to you. Changbin was dragging it out as long as he possibly could, avoiding suckling on your clit because he knew your body better than you did. You didn’t need much more to fall over the edge.

“W– what’s the last question?” You gripped the edge of the seat, leaning back and feet instinctively raising off the ground. He tried his hardest not to press his free hand into his cock, distracting himself by draping your legs over his shoulders and anchoring onto your thigh. The small pinches he left to your skin was only egging you closer and closer. He loved the way your walls clenched around his fingers, adding a third just because you were so enthusiastic.

“Which do you believe?”

“What?”

“Behavioralism or constructivism. Which do you believe?” He wound tighter circles into your clit, curling his fingers just right to lightly brush against your g-spot.

You were going to answer, you swear. But one good, accidental flick of his tongue made your thighs clamp around his head again, trapping Changbin in place while white clouded your vision and heat suffocated your skin. There was no stopping your orgasm now, so he gave in and suckled on your nub to help you ride out the high.

When you finally came down and released him, he licked the same fingers that were in your pussy and clapped a smack to your overly sensitive sex. It made you flinch and your knees shot up to hit the underside of the table. Your boyfriend took ahold of your ankles and forced them back around his neck as he came back in close to your core. Changbin delivered a few more wet slaps before soothing over it with his tongue.

“You failed, baby. Guess we’ll have to keep going.”

A/N: I have so many longer wips that I've been working on. Hope you all have been enjoying these shorter stories!

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his-angell · 11 months

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dumb prank. (s.cb)

plot; (y/n) found a stupid prank on Instagram, one where they wouldn't kiss their lover all day. While they thought it was a funny idea, Changbin didn't exactly take it well.

Paring; Seo Changbin x gn!reader (no pronouns mentioned!)

Genre; Angst, Fluff

Word Count; 1.1k

Request?; No

----------------------------------------------------

It had been a long day. Not as much for you as it had been for Changbin. He was so tired with filming and rehearsals, he just wanted to curl into the arms of his beautiful lover. But today was so weird. You had been avoiding any kisses from him, any hugs. You only held his hand. You weren’t mad, you weren’t upset. In fact, you were playing a stupid prank on your boyfriend. One you found on instagram. It was to go a day without kissing him. You thought it would be funny, but you hadn’t really thought it through before playing it on the male. Changbin was clingy. Anyone who knew him was aware of that fact. He needed to constantly be holding onto you, whether it be your hand, your waist, your pinky even. He needed to be touching you any time he could.

You had been home for a while. You always hung around with the boys while they were filming, or rehearsing, but today, you had gone home early. You were getting needy for some kisses. But you couldn’t fail your own prank. So you had left Changbin with nothing more than an ‘I love you!’ and a pat on the cheek. He had texted you after you left, asking where his kiss was. In which you only said, ‘Sorry my love, I didn’t wanna make the boys uncomfortable or anything.’ Which absolutely threw Changbin off, since you never had a problem kissing in front of them before now.

It was then the man started to overthink. Did you still love him? Did his breath smell? Was he too clingy? Were you ashamed to love him in front of the others? It had started to affect his performance a bit. He dreaded this all. Chan had noticed his behavior and talked to him. Changbin had told the leader of your weird actions all day. Chan did his best to give the other some words of wisdom. Which helped him through the rest of the day. Thank god.

Changbin had rushed home to you that day. He needed to talk to you. To get some sort of answer of why you were acting like this. He entered the code to your guys’ shared apartment and walked in. He slipped off his shoes and shrugged off his jacket, hanging it up. “Baby?” He called out as he walked further into the apartment. “In here, Bin,” You called out, looking up from your laptop, which you were using to watch some youtube.

Changbin rushed over. He sat down beside you and gently closed your laptop. You frowned as you watched him toss your laptop to the other side of the couch. You chuckled a little. “Yess?” You hummed, raising your eyebrow at your boyfriend, who gave you sad puppy dog eyes. “Why haven’t you given me any kisses today? Or even touched me other than holding my hand?” He asked, staring into your soul with his doe eyes.

You laughed nervously and shrugged. You felt as if he were interrogating you for some horrible crime. You swallowed the lump in your throat. “I dunno, just haven't felt like it.” You said. You weren’t ready to end the prank yet. You immediately regretted your choice though as you saw the way your boyfriend's face fell. He moved out of your personal space and looked down. “What do you mean you haven't felt like it?” He mumbled. It was like a punch in the face. Maybe he was taking it to heart, but normally you don’t tell your partner that you don't feel like giving them affection.

His heart ached as he thought about it. “Are you falling out of love with me?” He cracked out, his voice shaky and hesitant. Your eyes widened as you sat up, taking your boyfriend's face. He didn’t meet your gaze. He didn’t want to. He didn’t wanna see the look on your face. You let out a shaky sigh. “Binnie.. No,” You said. “Then why were you acting weird today?” Changbin moved out of your grasp and hid his face in his hands. He sniffed as tears brimmed his eyes.

He knew that he wasn’t overreacting now. He was so sure he was gonna lose the love of his life. It all showed. The way you shrugged him off today. All day! Even when he got home! It was normally everyday that he would come home and cuddle in your arms before dinner. He would shower you with kisses, and you would shower him back. It was something so small and sweet, but so important. He needed it. He needed you. Changbin felt like nothing without you. You were his world. His happiness. His darling love.

His sniffles and soft sobs filled the silence of the apartment. “No, no, no, Bin,” You got off the couch and kneeled in front of him. You moved his hands from his face and held them tightly. “Look at me,” You said, feeling your heart shatter when Changbins teary eyes met your gaze. “It was a prank..” You finally muttered. Changbins eyebrows furrowed. “What?” He whispered. “A prank- Today. It was stupid, I should have never done it. I didn’t stop to think how badly it would hurt you, and I'm so sorry, binnie.” You whispered softly, not breaking eye contact. You need him to know how truly sorry you were.

Changbin sniffled. “So you don’t hate me?..” His voice shook. You shook your head. “No! No, baby, I could never hate you!” You said quickly, taking his face into your hands. “Can I kiss you now then? Please.” Changbin asked, his eyes locked on your lips. You laughed softly and nodded. “Yes please.” You hushed. He pressed his lips to yours and smiled against you. He moved to grab you and pull you into his lap, not breaking the kiss.

After a while, you pulled away for air. You smiled softly. You gently wiped his tears with your thumbs. “I’m sorry, Bin, I really am.” You apologized again. Changbin shook his head. “It's okay..” He hid his face into your neck and hugged your waist. “I love you. Please don’t ever do that again.” He muttered. You hummed and ran your hands through his hair. “I won't. I love you too.” You kissed his head…

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this is a small story I wrote, and it's the first one im posting to tumblr, whoohoo!! This style of writing is new to me, 2nd person I think it is? If theres any mistakes, i'm sorry. I did my best! Most of my writing is in 3rd person, but I wanted to give this a shot. I hope you guys liked it! If there's anything i could do to improve my writing, please do let me know. I am taking requests, so plspls leave them!!

this story is based of a story by, @ppiri-bahng , 'thinking about a no kissing prank gone wrong on Minho.'

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inkelea · 5 months

Text

silent cry! ✭

pairing: roommate!seo changbin x gn!reader

synopsis: changbin always appears to be there when you are in your worst moments.

genre: angst, hurt/comfort. drabble.

warnings: very self indulgent, vent. can be triggering for those with anxiety or similar symptoms. implicit anxiety. the fic isn’t really about groceries, you can interpret it however you like.

word count: 0.5k

a/n: first binnie fic:), sorry for it being so sad.

the cold surface of the countertop freezes your face right after you lie on top of it. your eyes close, constant images of your worst nightmares coming true appearing one after another.

when a hand squeezes your shoulder, you jump, being freaked out by the sudden contact.

seo changbin is standing right next to you, a frown displayed on his face. for some reason, he is always aware when things aren’t right, always ready to give out a helping hand or a comforting smile.

“did something happen?”

by this point your eyes have closed again, water piling in them threatening to spill down your face onto your neck.

the origin of your state is too embarrassing to explain. something about having to express word by word all the feelings hovering in your mind makes your tears start to roll. your forehead stays glued to the table, hiding from the boy at your side.

“you can tell me if something has happened.”

you can’t see him, but you still know he is biting his lip, trying to find a solution to whatever that it’s tormenting your soul. nevertheless, that doesn’t work this time. you are way too deep already, ugly memories spinning in your head. unless other times, you don’t try to stop it, you let it guide yourself into the void, away from reality, from your problems, and from changbin.

the ceramic under you starts to feel too itchy, like it has only been now discovered that it’s rock, and so your headache begins. it’s a weird feeling, sensing everything and nothing at the same time. it’s too hot, and you need changbin to get his hand off you right now, but you are too cold to even think of letting his body warmth go away.

your name echoing in the room makes you snap back. your eyes finally see changbin, no longer imagining him with a worried expression but actually seeing him with it. he is tense, but your stone cold face doesn’t change, which only makes it worse. your eyes catch a glance of his right hand opening up and down in an anxious manner, something he always does when he is nervous. he doesn’t let you focus on it too much as he puts his other hand on your shoulder.

“i have to go do the groceries.”

his eyes open and his hand drops from your shoulder. checking all over you in search of any external injury makes him look like a madman. it’s funny, since you aren’t really registering anything happening at the moment. you’re on autopilot, your consciousness in a far away place.

“what?”

“but i’m too lazy.”

your tears have stopped rolling, only desperation being left.

taking out a chair from the counter, he sits, hand taking yours and resting both in your lap. “then stay home.”

home.

your eyes water up again. everything has changed. your eyebrows furrow, and your lip starts trembling.

hugging changbin isn’t new, but the situation is. he doesn’t care when you stain his shirt with silent cries, nor he cares about his shirt getting wrinkled by how hard you are holding into it. it’s like hugging an old plushie that still smells like happiness.

“okay. i’ll stay home.”

@mochamvgz

#skz x reader #stray kids x reader #skz angst #stray kids angst #skz hurt/comfort #stray kids hurt/comfort #seo changbin x reader #seo changbin angst #skz blurbs #stray kids blurbs #skz drabbles #stray kids drabbles

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chvnnie · 10 months

Text

Letter One: Smoke and Tears

Love Letters Series Page

wc: 2.7k

genre: angst

warnings: apocalypse au, creature feature, use of weapons (guns), alcohol - brief, injuries (gunshot wounds, though no details), fire. I believe that's all, but if I missed anything, PLEASE LET ME KNOW

summary: It's been over a week since you've heard from Chan, and the guilt is burning him alive.

this is a work of fiction. this fic in no way represents the stray kids members as people, or as a whole. you are responsible of the media you consume. please read responsibly.

series taglist: @straystayvlive, @fawnpeaks, @strayingawayy, @almighty-obsession, @ershyni, @chai-papa, @moon0fthenight, @djeniryuu — comment to be added

Hey, you.

I know I promised to write sooner. There has been a lot happening and while I sat down with my notebook daily, fully intending to respond to your last letter, something forced my attention away. I’m so fucking sorry it took me this long. I haven’t been very good about keeping my promise, have I?

I promise to change that. Actually. There’s no excuse for missing that week window like I did. And it will never happen again.

We got to the south side of town seven days ago. It was difficult leaving midtown, but staying there wasn’t practical. On top of all the haunting reminders, it started to get overrun. Rather than cling to the past, desperate to keep it despite its death, we chose to leave.

The journey south only took us a day or so, but was relatively easy. Jisung cried the entire first day, walking further behind us than we would have preferred. The change has been the hardest for him — he really hasn’t settled in yet here. I’m scared he never will.

But other than that, there really weren’t many hiccups. I was feeling optimistic; we hadn’t had this good of a journey probably since the start of it all. No injuries, no misplaced anger. Simply doing what we needed to survive.

We even found a bunker within the day of arrival, saving us the risk of camping out in the open. A tall, abandoned building. I think it used to be an office. The cubicles have been nice. You know how limited privacy is now, so we take what we can get. It was easy to barricade all the exits, and our walkies actually work here (that was the one thing about midtown I despised). There’s even a kitchen! God, what a luxury. Truly, it seemed like a long term place.

Until day four.

There’s only two entries to the office; the front and the fire escape. It was Seungmin’s night to guard the front, Hyunjin at the back. I sat in the long conference room with Jisung — the window faces the street. It’s a good lookout. All was quiet, as it had been so far. I pulled out my journal fully intending to write to you.

That’s when Jisung gasped, pulling his binoculars from his face and hitting me to grab my attention. I grabbed my own, and followed where he was pointing. No, it wasn’t what you’re expecting.

“Are those people?” Jisung had asked me.

My vision isn’t bad, but even I had to squint. He was right; though the group wasn’t big, it was obvious by the way they were walking.

By the torches they were holding.

For a while, we just watched. But I don’t think it was from lack of entertainment, rather sheer shock. The torches were touching homes, old buildings, flames blossoming at high speeds and dancing in the night sky. Screaming for attention, begging the Nots to come find them. To find all of us.

The south side isn’t safe. Though the word has spread, I can tell you my love, that I’ve never feared I wouldn’t see you again until we broke into this god forsaken office building.

Jisung had a window cracked, the perfect amount of space for his sniper to slip through. He was up and at the gun before I could fully process what was happening.

“I have a shot.” He says within seconds, the cracked circular glasses fogging up. “At one. I could take at least three out—“

“Don’t.” I said, adjusting the binoculars to get a better view. Twelve people, I counted. All around our age, a mix of men and women. Each of them laughed as they turned the earth to ash. “Wait.”

“Chan, we need to act now.” He’s getting ready. I can tell. Tongue between his teeth, digging until the muscle breaks into a tiny cut, blood slowly filling his mouth. “They’re headed our way.”

He’d give away our location, I explained. The group isn’t close enough to be a danger. We need to wait, to see if there's a motive behind the destruction. Humanity is all united against the dark — there has to be a purpose behind this betrayal.

Jisung wasn’t happy with me. Between forcing him from midtown and now this, I feared that night that if we didn’t lose our lives, I’d lose one of my most trusted friends. Still, he didn’t shoot, following the one we picked as the leader with his gun. Ready in case the okay was given.

It didn’t take long for me to allow it. I don’t want our letters to just be about the horrors we’re facing. The suffering of being apart. So I will spare you the details of what made me allow the shot, and death of these twelve people.

We didn’t see the thirteenth until it was too late. Until the makeshift cross was pitched in the center of the burning homes, the screams of this man were loud enough to wake the dead. In a world where everything has been taken from us, our lives forced apart, something I believe we all deserve is safety.

Except for the twelve. While I mourned the man, I was delighted to watch the fire claim its creators.

The rest of the night was quiet. Jisung and I sat in silence as we watched other refugees extinguish the flames, sharing a can beer we had been shaving. The luxury felt needed after what we had witnessed.

His hair has gotten long. I think you’d really like it; it’s charming, especially when he ties in a little half pony. The cut on his cheek I mentioned in my last letter has healed nicely; Seungmin is getting better at his stitch work. The stars weren’t visible that night, but with the moonlight that pooled in from the windows, his eyes made you think there were.

After he took a sip of the beer, his face twisted in disgust. “This is rancid.”

It made me laugh, the dramatic way he stuck out his tongue as he searched for the water jug. “I think it might be a little expired.”

“Oh? You think?”

“If you want to be a bitch, then I’ll just finish it off.”

God. I wish you could have seen the way he smiled, or could have felt the warmth that filled my chest at the sight of it. It’s been so long since I’ve seen Jisung smile like that. He even laughed, which made me do the same even though my eyes were burning from smoke and tears.

I volunteered to keep watch the next few nights, though it didn’t come without push back. I said I wasn’t tired, though the truth is that I didn’t want to subject the rest of them to the suffering happening outside this building. They’ve had it hard enough, and I don’t want to add to their burden.

Day five, Felix and Changbin went out to find supplies. We made a list — things we needed, things we wanted. If a luxury could be stolen, it should be. Felix had the paper, smiling brightly at me when I gave it to him.

I never expected to hear his sobs mere hours later. Head on Hyunjin’s lap as Seungmin tended to the wound he had gotten while they were at a store. They ran into a group of humans, they said. In the same building, though at the other side. While Changbin kept his gun drawn, they agreed to ignore them. That’s just what you do — let others survive.

Until they saw them. And laughed, laughed, laughed when they shot Felix in the thigh. Changbin’s voice trembled when he described the group of people. Jisung looked at me, face expressionless but eyes wide.

There were more than twelve.

Superficial, Seungmin said. He was able to remove the bullet and tend to the wound. Felix would be okay, other than the limp he’s sure to suffer long term.

“Charming, in a way.” Seungmin joked, but it made Lix laugh. Exactly what we all wanted; if he loses his sunshine, what’s the point?

We were blessed with day six. Nothing happened. Literally — Jeongin even started to nod off at his position. The day was spent playing cards or huddling around the beat up radio. Hyunjin started a mural on one of the walls, the colors bringing us the joy we so desperately needed.

I spent the day in one of the empty conference rooms. Sitting under the window, thumbing through the photo book you gave me. Remember that day we went to the movies to see some cheesy Christmas movie? You hated it, mocking it the entire time just to get teary eyed at the end. In the parking lot, you hit me with a snowball and how was I to let that slide? I love that photo of you, drenched in water and snow, laughing as you build another snowball.

I flipped through it over and over, happily losing myself in the worlds tucked in those glossy photos. Though everything in the world is meeting a fiery end, you are the one constant. The driving force behind my survival, behind the protection of the others. Without you, I would succumb to the flame. Life is not worth living without you, even if all I have is letters and memories.

Fire may take your words, though it will never take my heart.

That day would have been a wonderful one to write. But instead I spent it reading your letters, tracing the characters of your name. How does it look so lovely? How do you make words beautiful? I spent it looking at your pictures, bringing the album to my nose and inhaling deeply. It still has faint hints of the home we shared together. Do you think we might be able to return one day? Even if not, it won’t matter. I just want you.

But closer. We are getting closer, and closer to getting to you. It’s taken more time than I would have liked, but the apocalypse doesn’t really like making time for people. By the time you read this, we’ll have left the south side. Step by step, closer to you.

I miss the way you kiss me. The way your lips feel against my body. I miss your breath tangling with mine like the snow colored sheets we used to lay upon. I miss inhaling you, breathing you. The way your breath would hitch when you’re surprised, when you feel good. The little huffs of air your face before laughing your heart out.

Fuck. I need to hear that sound again. The cassette tape you sent me isn’t enough anymore. I need you.

I fell asleep in that office, your letters pressed to my chest. And when I dreamed, it was only of you. Watching the smoke hand and hand.

The sixth day, yesterday, the Nots arrived.

We watched as they entered the town; boney backs arched, long nails scraping the streets. Their horrible squeals were almost piercing, even with our windows shut. It’s always so chilling to see them; the remains of humanity lingering on their morphed bodies. Slowly, they slink down the street. Sniffing for any signs of life.

Felix was tucked in one of the bathrooms with Seungmin, a walkie turned on loud. If we needed to go, it needed to be fast — which left Hyunjin packing our belongings as Changbin, Jisung, and I stood in the very same conference room where we first saw the twelve.

“They look rough.” Changbin comments, leaning against the window. He had been keeping watch on the front entrance; even though Jeongin and Minho were standing guard. A warning would be valued. “They’re hungry.”

Jisung gagged at the word, cleaning his glasses with the sleeve of his sweater. “Fucking gross, don’t say that—“

“Why do you think they’re so loud? They’re getting desperate.”

At this point, I realized my optimism was playing a part in my downfall. Even as I watched the crowd of Nots scavenge the debris, looking in trash cans and behind fences, I could only think about how lucky we were to be so high up. They couldn’t touch us, tucked away on the fifth floor of the building.

The lookout walkie gave a crackling noise before Minho’s voice cut through; clear, measured, even though his tone was obviously frantic.

“Breach at the fire escape.” He says quickly.

I picked up our walkie. “Do you hear anything?”

It felt like a century before he responded, all of us holding our breath as we waited. The silence was more chilling than the shrill squawks below. It’s one we all know too well; they’ve found prey. I can only hope it isn’t us.

Minho clicks back on, and I realize it was naive of me to be scared of the Nots. “Laughter.”

The room began to spin, my ears void of all sound except the sound of laughter. Louder and louder it, closer and closer to our floor. The most horrible melody, leaving the bitter taste of blood in my mouth as my body feels like it’s melting.

They have flames.

“Seungmin, take Felix out the front.” I clicked in, trying to stay as calm as possible. “Now, hurry—“

“The Nots are out.” Changbin says, eyes bouncing from the direction of the fire escape to the window. “They’re not going to make it.”

“We don’t have a choice.” Jisung mumbles, opening a window to set his gun up. He squints one eye, tracking the creatures with the barrel of his gun. “I’ll take out as many as I can.”

It was a lose/lose. No matter which exit we took, the risk was high. But something in my gut told me that we rather deal with the Nots than whatever is making that bloodcurdling laugh.

“How close are they, Minho?”

The silence is a beat too long. “Too close. We need to fucking go.”

There wasn’t much more than needed to be said. By the time Jisung had shot down a good number of Nots, the laughter was accompanied by banging. Slow, hollow knocks. Their fists were hitting the door.

And then came the heat.

The flames grew slowly from under the metal door, dancing on the worn out carpet. By the time we were rushing down the main staircase, it had already enveloped the room I had slept in. Where I had dreamed of you.

If it weren’t for Jisung, we probably wouldn’t have been able to escape as easily as we did. Hurdling over twitching bodies of Nots, we kept our gaze ahead. Running past the cross, ducking behind remains of buildings. I don’t know how long we ran for until we came across an empty convenience store. Changbin pushed a stand against the door after we cleared it. Boxing ourselves in temporary shelter.

At the window, Jisung stood. Arms crossed, watching the smoke tangle with the clouds. He heard me coming, yet didn’t even look up at me. “I told you we should have never left the mid.”

He didn’t sleep last night. Neither did I.

We are leaving the store pretty soon. Seungmin is checking on Felix’s wound, Changbin and Minho mapping out a new route as I write. We’re heading east this time. I’m not sure when we will stop yet.

But east means we’re closer to you.

I’m mailing the letter today, too. According to the calendar we’ve been keeping, it’s now August 23. The heat has been sweltering here — how is it there, for you? Probably that much different, but you’re further north than us. I can only hope a cool fall breeze will greet us when I meet you again.

I picked a new spot for you to send your letter as our location has changed — I’ll attach a map to this and check it daily. I know we’ll be in that area for a while, so send there for now. Hopefully we won’t have to flee again, but I won’t be too optimistic this time.

The world may be on fire, but so is my love for you (hahahahaha). But truly, if it weren’t for you, the apocalypse wouldn’t seem so bearable.

Stay safe, my love. I’m coming home soon.

Forever yours,

Chan

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bbyquokka · 1 year

Text

not alone

pairing: seo changbin x gender neutral reader

genre: angst, comfort – MDNI

synopsis: it's getting bad again and changbin knows so he comforts you the best he can, reminding you that you're 'not alone'

warnings: mental health, general feeling of very low moods, established relationship, pet names, negative emotions, soft ending

words: 1.7k ~ (1762)

☆ m.list — ☆ you can also read it on my ao3

dont repost. dont translate. minors, ageless & default blogs; dni! feedback and reblogs are highly advised and appreciated!

it's getting bad again.

your old habits are creeping up on you and as much as you don't want them to, you have no choice but to let them.

you look down at your digital sketch, hate, resentment and anger seeping from your pores. you hate it, you hate it so much you're tempted to erase it and start all over again.

you snap a quick picture, sending it to your friends in hopes that their words would help soothe your overbearing thoughts. when you see notifications pop up here and there, friends telling you how talented of an artist you are, it does soothe you–to some extent

however, that side is telling you differently. you know they mean well, you know their words are filled with love and that they truly mean what they say, but you can't help but feel like they pity you, just saying things you want to hear to make you feel better.

you don't want to hate your art. art is what you love most, finding inspiration from everything and anything. you tried one more time to fall in love with your current piece before giving up after you feel yourself getting angry at trying to fix the same wonky line.

“that's enough for today.” you mumble to yourself, leaning back in your chair. your phone pings, a message from changbin pops up. you press your lips together, placing your phone screen side down on the desk. “sorry binnie, not today.”

you chew on your bottom lip, the sound of your phone constantly vibrating causing you to get anxious as well as annoyed. letting out a hefty sigh, you pick up your phone to see that changbin has called you 4 times and left dozens of messages.

“I said, not today.” you grumble, throwing your phone on your bed. it lands with a soft bounce as you rub your face with your hands.

you gather the remainder of your energy to push yourself up off your seat. you drag your tired body to the kitchen, rummaging around in the cupboards in hopes to get some inspiration on what to eat. your mind runs on blanks, your mood dipping lower and lower.

you're tired. not psychically, mentally. you don't want to feel like this and you wouldn't wish it upon your worst enemy. at times like this it's easy for you to isolate yourself, stay locked up in your bedroom and sleep the days away–but a certain someone won't allow that to happen.

as you make your way to the bedroom to bury yourself under the blankets and watch some corny series, a knock at the door is brought to your attention. your brows furrow together, anxiety creeping its way up to the back of your throat.

who could that possibly be? you weren't expecting a delivery nor company. the thought of company drained you even more, if that was even possible.

you look through the peephole, sighing softly before opening the door to let in your boyfriend.

“why haven't you been returning my calls or messages?” he asks, looking at you as you close the door.

you swallow, looking down as you play with the sleeves of your oversized hoodie. you chew your lip, guilt sinking in along with the tens of thousands negative emotions you're feeling right now.

he knows. you don’t have to say anything. he's observant. he softly sighs, wrapping his arms around your frame and pulling you into his broad chest.

“it's bad again, huh?” his voice is so soft, making your resolve crumble. you grip onto his clothing tightly, eyes squeezing shut as tears suddenly fall down your cheeks like a waterfall.

“hey, it's okay. binnie's here, binnie's got you.” he wraps his strong arms around you, rocking you side to side as his fingers comb through your hair slowly. he hushes you, kissing your head gently. the material of his own hoodie getting soaked in your tears and snot.

your uncontrollable sobs shake your body, uneven breathing as you choke on your saliva and tears.

“hey hey hey.” changbin pulls away for a split second to cup your cheeks in his hands. you look up at him, lashes wet, eyes red and puffy as your cheeks are stained. “breathe baby, remember to breathe”

you look at him, coping his motions and techniques. you breath in, count to ten before slowly letting out your breath. you feel your heart rate slow down, mind feeling somewhat calmer.

“well done, darling.” he whispers before pulling you back into his chest. you bury your face into his hoodie, clinging to him like a new born baby as you inhale his scent that helps calm you down.

“why didn't you call or text me, baby?”

“i don't… i don't know, binnie.” you whisper, the same guilty feeling resuming and sinking in your stomach heavily.

“what have i told you in the past?” you look up at him with a sad pout, sniffling softly.

“t-to call you when i start feeling bad again…”

“mhm.” changbin hums, wiping away your tears and snot with the sleeve of his hoodie

“a-are you mad at me, binnie…?” you whisper, swallowing. you hope he isn't however you wouldn't blame him if he was. you did promise him and you broke it, it'd be understandable if he was.

“no, i'm not mad, baby. why would I be?”

“because i promised and i broke it…”

“that doesn't matter, baby. what matters is that i'm here now and i'm going to care for you.” you nod slowly, pulling away from his grip as you take deep breaths

“first things first, get dressed.” you look at him with a blank expression on your face.

“why?”

“we're going out.” you sigh deeply, shoulders slumping.

“binnie, i–”

“not asking, i'm telling and i won't take no as an answer. i'll give you 10 minutes and we're leaving, whether you're ready or not.” you nod once before dragging your body to the bedroom.

you settled on jeans and one of changbin's oversized sweaters, ruffling your hair to make it look better before walking back to him.

“ready?”

“i guess.” you shrug.

“let's go then.”

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

changbin took you to an embankment next to a river. the sun is slowly setting, saying goodbye to the world before the moon and her children appear to light up the night sky.

you stare into the sunset, watching it slowly sink. the orange, yellow haze of the sky makes you feel warm, reminding you of summer. you wrap your arms around your knees, holding them close to you as a cold breeze suddenly hits.

“here.” changbin takes off the jacket he was wearing over his hoodie, placing it around your shoulders.

“thanks.” you weakly smile at him, before resting your chin on your hand.

“why didn't you call me, babe?” you shrug, swallowing a burning lump in your throat.

“because it's easier if i don't talk about it. it's not real that way.”

“but you shouldn't have to struggle with this alone, darling.”

“i-i know but i don't want to be a burden. it's bad enough i have to live with it. i don't want to push it onto others as well.”

“when we got together, what was the first thing i said to you?”

you clench your jaw, furiously blinking back tears as your bottom lip quivers. changbin smiles softly, wrapping his arm around your shoulder and pulling you close to his side.

“t-that i'm not alone.” your voice breaks, tears spilling down your cheeks.

“exactly. so you shouldn't suffer alone, babe. i'm always here for you just like everyone else around you because we care and treasure you!”

“but what if… what if you get sick of me and leave? what if i'm too much for you?”

“you'll never, ever be too much for me babe. you're stuck with me forever. life works in mysterious ways. sometimes it treats us well and sometimes it treats us like shit, that we cannot help. however–” he pauses, taking your hand in his gently. “–it's how we deal with the rough that makes a difference. sure, you can go back home, bury yourself in your duvet and isolate yourself from everyone, but what good will that do?”

“it doesn't. it just makes it worse..”

“exactly. so why do it babe?”

“because i don't want you to hate me, binnie and i don't want to hate you either, but sometimes it's too loud up there that i project my negative feelings onto others which makes me hate and fall out of love with things and people.”

“then hate me because at least you're still here to hate.”

“b-binnie–” you look up at him, tears cascading down your cheeks. he wipes away your tears with his thumb before stroking your cheek.

“i know, deep down, that you don't hate me, that you love me more than anything. i know that babe. i want you with me, i want you by my side. there is only one of you on this earth, so treasure yourself like everyone else around you does.”

“but my feelings–”

“are valid. you're valid, babe. i know it gets loud up there but surround yourself with people who help lessen that burden, who silence the noise.”

“why do i feel like this, binnie…”

“because you're human, my love. you feeling things and emotions, whether they be good or bad, proves you're alive.”

“why me..? why do you put up with this when you could just easily leave, find someone else and have an easier life.” you mumble, biting your lip gently. changbin sighs softly, cupping your cheeks in his hands.

you look in his eyes, suffocating with the amount of love his eyes hold for you. you place your hands on top of his, feeling your worries melt away. all the negativity and angst slowly washing away as you get lost in his eyes.

for the first time in a long time, you could feel your heart beating hard against your chest, threatening to break free.

“because i don't love anyone else other than you. i treasure the good and the bad. you hurt, i hurt. i want to protect you, be a shoulder for you to lean on. till death do us part.”

you laugh softly, rolling your eyes at him.

“binnie, that's something you say when you're getting married to someone.”

“maybe i want to marry you.” changbin says, nonchalantly.

“d-dont play with my heart binnie.” you stutter, cheeks flushing pink at the thought.

“who says i'm joking?”

note: the last instalment of starry's treasure trove!

i wrote this a while ago as a way of comforting my friend. he gave me permission to post this in hopes others will find comfort in it as well ‹3

don’t forget to leave feedback, reblog and tell me what you think here. curious as to what is next? here is my wips list! i hope you all enjoy! ‹3

tags (open): @sstarryoong ; @oshimee ; @fairylouist ; @septicrebel ; @bbujiikseu ; @cixrosie ; @alyszaen ; @writerracha ; @hyunluvxo ; @aestheticsluut ; @xcookiemonsteer

#kwritersworldnet #wkcnet #straykidsland #skz angst #stray kids angst #changbin x you #changbin x reader #skz x you #skz x reader #stray kids x you #stray kids x reader #changbin angst #seo changbin angst #seo changbin x you #seo changbin x reader

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noramoons · 2 years

Text

feels like we only go backwards

pairing: seo changbin x fem reader (afab)

genre: college au, frat boy!changbin

includes: angst, smut, (slight) fluff

rating: mature/18+ (minors DNI.)

warnings: mentions of drinking, food, language, explicit sexual content, friends with benefits, oral (f receiving), unprotected sex (wrap it before u tap it), a relationship that starts out toxic (please communicate with your romantic/sexual partners :D)

word count: 8.5k

summary: it’s been three years since you’ve seen changbin. you’ve gotten over your crush on him.

haven’t you?

This is, without a doubt, the worst frat party you've ever been to.

In all fairness, it's also the only frat party you've ever been to. You've spent almost the entirety of your college career away from this crowd; your goal has always been to get in and get out of university, nothing more, and nothing less, and you've done it in record time—just over three years, with your next semester also being your last. You're proud of yourself for how hard you've worked—how you've put your nose to the metaphorical grindstone and done nothing but work for three years, turning down all the party invitations, the weekend getaways, the spring break trips—all of it, so you could be done with school and get started on the part of your life that actually matters.

Well—you turned down most of them.

Your roommate, Saori, had begged you to go out with her this weekend—you’ve been such a stick in the mud (a direct quote!) for the past three years. She’s known you for years, your whole life, practically, and she says she misses who you used to be be. Back when you used to be fun. And it’s almost the end of the fall semester—there won’t be that many parties after this, after all.

So you agreed to go, albeit begrudgingly. Those goddamned emotions were finally getting to you again, of all things.

But now you're here. Saori had left you for the dance floor hours ago, leaving you with your back against the wall at the back of the room with a half-full red Solo cup in one hand. How revoltingly cliché.

You scan the room in front of you again. These kinds of parties have to only be fun if you're drunk—you can't understand the appeal otherwise. The dance floor across from you is full of nothing but senseless swaying and grinding, half of it not even on beat with the music booming in the speakers, reverberating in your chest and pounding against your ears.

It's on this final scan that you see a familiar face, though, and you nearly drop the plastic cup in your hand.

You almost laugh, but you don't.

Instead, you stare at the side profile of the man you think you'd recognize anywhere until he finally turns to make eye contact with you, and he looks just as surprised as you.

Seo Changbin.

"Y/N?"

You throw up your free hand in feigned defeat, plastering a fake smile on your lips instantly as he strolls over. You have an instant of mental panic thinking he's going to go in for a hug, but he saves you from your thoughts when he delivers a light punch to your shoulder.

"What are you doing here? I didn't know you even went to this school."

You let out a short laugh at that. "Yeah, I didn't know you did either. Kinda defeats the whole purpose of going to college this far away."

He cocks one eyebrow at you. "You came all this way just to avoid me?"

You make a face. "N-no, I meant people from high school. In general."

Changbin's grin widens. You could smack him. "Right."

You change the subject. "So...you're in this frat?"

He nods. "Sure am. Thought it would be a good way to meet people, get involved."

Right. "How's it been?" The small talk is killing you, you think, eating you away from the inside out—but you suppose it's better than the alternative. Besides, the two of you have always been good at this—practically lying to each other's faces to keep from actually having a serious conversation.

"It's been great, I've had an awesome time so far. I'm surprised I've never seen you before though—did you transfer?"

As if. "Oh, no—I came with my roommate. This, uh, isn't really my thing."

Changbin smirks at that. He lifts his index finger from being curled around the drink in his hand to point at the cup in yours. "That your first drink?"

You nod.

"I'll grab you another one. These are no fun if you're sober."

Funny—you'd just been thinking that. "Oh, Changbin, you don't have to, I—"

But he's already waving your words away as he walks towards the drink counter on the other side of the room.

He'd been your lab partner in chemistry senior year. God, you'd hated chemistry—but he hadn't. Rather, he'd taken to the subject like a duck to water, much to your chagrin—at least, until you realized he couldn't write an essay to save his life. A bargain was struck: he'd help you in chemistry, you'd help him in writing composition. Simple.

Simple. Which was exactly what it was supposed to be. And, in your defense, it had been, at first: his house wasn't even that far from yours. You'd walk over after school, or he'd knock on your door an hour or so after you got home. You'd exchange tips on your respective homework, and you'd return to your respective houses.

Before long, you're both doing well enough in your classes to stay afloat—but you still find yourself over at each other's houses several days of the week anyway. Half the time you don't even talk about school—you catch up on a show you're both becoming obsessed with, or he shows you a new song from some group you've never heard of, or you tell him about how crazy your parents are driving you this week, and he tells you about his ex-girlfriend being passive-aggressive towards him in the cafeteria, and it all still feels simple. Easy. Meant to be.

It still feels that way the day he kisses you on the couch in the middle of your movie marathon. You're glad you'd seen that movie before, because you don't end up getting to watch the end of it—or any of the sequels afterward. It's nothing more than background noise with Changbin's lips on your neck and his deft fingers unbuttoning the front of your jeans.

You barely make it in the front door the next time you come over before his hands are on you, and the time after that is the same way—all hurried, hushed words and soft kisses and clothes in a pile on his bedroom floor—and God, you've never known anything like this. You've fooled around before, maybe, but it almost scares you how fast you fall for Changbin. You had admired him long before you became lab partners in your shared chemistry class—you'd secretly been so glad when those classroom assignments had been announced, and you had been happy to just be friends at the beginning. This—whatever the two of you are now is more than you could have ever hoped for. It feels like all the pieces are falling into place.

That's why it's such a surprise when he doesn't ask you to come over the day before your next chemistry exam. You'd been planning a big study session for both of you—flashcards, color-coded notes, the works. And maybe you'd put on that pink set of lingerie he liked so much underneath your clothes that morning just in case anything else happened. Again.

Instead, he sends you a message, asking you to meet him in the parking lot after school. You'd felt that uneasy pit of nerves forming in the bottom of your stomach at the text, something you've never felt around him, and you hope you're just overthinking things.

You aren't.

Those last words of his to you stick in the front of your brain for weeks, like gum you can't get off the bottom of your shoe.

"I just don't think I can do anything like this right now. You know it hasn't been that long since Suran and I broke up, and I just think I might have moved too quickly on this."

You'd nodded quickly—too quickly, swallowing back tears as you did so. "Y-yeah, no, I get that. It's okay."

Changbin had given you a sad little smile. "You know, you can keep my jacket. If you want."

Asshole.

He'd said he didn't think he could do anything—so why had he done anything in the first place?

You're distracted from your thoughts when he returns with another red cup, holding it out towards you. "How're classes going?"

You almost miss the smirk that flashes across his face for a brief instant as he watches you down the rest of your drink in one gulp, taking the new cup from his outstretched hand. "Alright, I guess. How about you?"

Changbin shrugs. "Same here. What's your major again?"

'Again—' as if he'd asked before. "Communications."

"Oh, nice!" he says, nodding. "I'm in music production."

You almost let out a laugh. "Music production, huh? What, are you on SoundCloud, too?"

His grin only widens. "Want me to send you my link? Or you could come over and listen to it, sometime," he adds with a wink.

You laugh, despite yourself—and maybe it's the alcohol in your system loosening the tension in your chest, and maybe it isn't—but you feel suddenly stricken with the reminder that the two of you were friends, once. And he'd been easy to get along with, easier than any other guy you'd ever hung around.

Those first few weeks after you'd broken up (could you even say you'd broken up, really, if you'd never actually been together?) had been weird, to say the least. You'd done horrible on the exam the following day, something you would spend the entire rest of the semester making up for, and neither of you said a word to each other for weeks, about the class or otherwise. It wasn't until the next test rolled around that you reluctantly suggested comparing notes again—after school, of course, and in the coffee shop downtown. You weren't letting him in your house again, and you certainly weren't going over to his.

It had struck you in that moment, too, how well the two of you got along—sure, it had been awkward at first, pulling out your notes and talking about chemical titrations again like nothing had happened—but maybe it was better this way. You both work better as friends, clearly, so maybe that's all you should ever aim to be. At least you have this.

You think about that as your gaze flickers back up to his. You should say no, you think. You should yell at him for being such a pretentious dick, for not even bringing up how you'd left things senior year—but you don't. Instead, a half-smile crawls its way up the side of your mouth before you can stop it. "Sure."

~~~

It had scared you, those years ago, how quickly you'd fallen for him. Now, it scares you how easy you're able to fall into a routine again with him—as if nothing at all had happened. As if you're simply picking up from the last day of your shared chemistry class.

You still have an infuriating amount of things in common—you may even have more of the same interests now than you did in high school. You still watch the same shows, listen to the same music—and you'd be lying if you said he wasn't talented in that department, too. He invites you over one night while he works on an assignment with a few other students from the music department, and they're all good. Unbelievably so.

You fit in well with his friends, too—they're all just as funny and quick-witted as Changbin. Seeing him laugh again—especially when you're the cause of it, making him laugh that hearty, musical chuckle with something you said or did feels better than you remember.

You're all laughing together one night, playing a stupid drinking game at your apartment, and the alcohol in your system isn't the only thing making you feel so light headed. Changbin keeps grabbing hold of your shoulder when he laughs, throwing his head back and holding on to you for support, and you're suddenly having a hard time remembering why you'd been so stressed to see him nearly a month ago at that party.

The oldest of Changbin's friends—Chan, the grad student, points at you as he tries to stifle his laughter. "You lost!" he says, a little too gleefully. "Again!"

"Okay, okay! I get it, I'm going!" you shout over the noise of the music playing in the background, shooting him a fake grimace as you throw back another shot of vodka as punishment for not knowing the drummer for some obscure band you've never heard of.

They all cheer when you slam the empty shot glass back on the counter, and now you're the one giggling as you hold onto Changbin for support. He shoves your shoulder lightly when he notices, but he doesn't push you off of him.

"Alright, alright," Chan starts again once the commotion starts to quiet down again. "Changbin's turn. Truth or dare?"

Changbin shrugs. "Truth."

"Okay. What was the first thing I asked you last year in Professor Jang’s class?"

Changbin tilts his head to the side, but he only has to think for a few moments. "'Do you have a pencil I could borrow?'"

There's an immediate chorus of laughter around the circle, Jisung's laugh heard almost above everyone else's from your left. "He's too good at these, man. Changbin's no fun with these games."

Chan waves his words away. "Quit complaining already, it's your turn. You lost last round, so you get to ask."

Jisung scans the circle. "Alright...Hyunjin. Truth or dare?"

Hyunjin takes a moment to decide. "Dare."

Jisung, however, doesn't take long to choose a dare. "You should kiss Y/N."

You feel like everything slows down immediately, as if you're suddenly completely sober. All four pairs of eyes are on you, looking you up and down—including Hyunjin's.

You meet his gaze right back.

"You don't have to, you know," Chan reminds Hyunjin (and the rest of the group). "You can always take the shot instead."

Hyunjin's eyes haven't left yours. "I know."

You think you'd probably be panicking internally if you were sober—this is only the second time you've seen Hyunjin, and you were decidedly much less tipsy the first time you'd met. Not to mention the fact that he's practically Adonis reincarnated—you'd have to be blind to not notice the sharp cut of his jawline or the fullness of his lips.

But you aren't sober now—and that's probably what gives you the courage to take a step closer to him. The rest of the group practically melts away when he cups a hand under your jaw, tilting your head up to press his lips to yours in a brief kiss—hardly more than a peck, really, but you're brought back to Earth by the cacophony of cheers from the men around you, taking a step back as Hyunjin lets go of your jaw, both of you grinning sheepishly.

Your eyes flicker past Hyunjin, to the man right behind him, and your blood practically runs cold when you see the look in Changbin's eyes—the quiet kind of anger you've only ever seen on him a handful of times.

You suddenly feel a twinge of guilt—why? There's no reason for you to be thinking about him. There's no reason for you to feel guilty about doing anything without his permission, for Christ's sake—you couldn't be less involved if you tried. And yet, you think about that inexplicable emotion in his eyes, that clench of his jaw with his hands in his pockets, for long after the party ends.

~~~

This is stupid, you think.

Changbin's ignoring you. There's not a doubt in your mind.

You'd been meeting Changbin at least once a week for food or studying before that party—he'd text you or you'd text him. It's been three weeks since that now-infamous party, since your barely-there-kiss with Hyunjin, and there's been nothing from Changbin. Complete radio silence.

You tell yourself you don't care. You've gotten by for three whole years since high school with scarcely a thought about the man. Surely you can carry on now without seeing him every now and then.

You don't care. You don't.

Which is definitely why you practically jump out of your seat when his name pops up at the top of your notifications.

s.c

> you going to jisung's tonight?

y/n

< hadn't planned to lol. is something happening?

s.c

> we're doing a movie night

> i told him to text you like a week ago lmao

You could've told me, you think. You're reminded of the feeling you'd had at that first frat party where you'd seen Changbin, almost three months ago now—you knew as well as you knew your own name then that you should have said no when he asked you to come over.

s.c.

> you coming? it's at 8

You should say no this time.

y/n

< yeah, i'll see you there

~~~

Changbin's friends are, to put it nicely, absolutely terrible chefs.

Chan and Jisung had meant to make pizza rolls for the group, using the oven they were so happy to have in the apartment to feed their friends with. Once everyone comes over, however, the rolls are all but forgotten in the commotion of six people talking in the apartment all at once—at least, until Hyunjin suddenly smells something in the kitchen, he says. Something really bad.

Both Chan and Jisung let out an anguished yell at the same time—"the pizza rolls!—" but it's far too late for the blackened, melted orbs in the oven that were once frozen rolls.

There's only a few other things the boys keep in the pantry that you could even consider edible—which is how you find yourself on the couch a few hours later, a bowl of stale popcorn on your lap and a half-empty bottle of water in the other.

Half the men had fallen asleep in the middle of the first movie, and the rest had dozen off somewhere in the second. You're the only person awake to catch the end of the trilogy, but you find that you don't really mind, even if it's a movie you've seen once or twice before. There's something impossibly and almost beautifully serene in the moment—five other men around you, who have been some of the loudest people you've ever met, all perfectly quiet and asleep, empty bags of chips and candies strewn around them on the other couches and armchairs. It's an unusual scene, but it's one that you find yourself comfortably content in anyway.

Once the movie's over, you tell yourself you're going to go home, letting the TV go on autoplay as it selects another random movie to begin as you slowly rise up from the couch, trying your utmost not to disturb any of the sleeping men in the room.

At least, you'd thought they'd all been asleep.

A hand clasps at your wrist as you move to stand.

You look down. "Changbin?" you whisper, sitting back down as slowly as you can. "I thought you were asleep."

He shakes his head, moving to sit up beside you on the couch. "I've been awake for a bit. That movie bored me half to death."

You laugh quietly. "I didn't think it was that bad. Not like that stupid space series you used to be so fond of, though."

Changbin gasps, clutching his chest in mock offense. "I can't believe this, Y/N. We're too different these days," he says, laughing. "We used to be so similar."

There's a pang in your heart at those words. You had been so similar, once. There was a time, albeit a brief one, where you did everything together, and it had felt so right. Like you'd been meant to do so.

He grins, continuing. "I'm glad we're friends again."

A soft smile flies to your lips before you're even aware of it. "I'm glad we are, too."

You sit in that moment of contentment with him for just a moment too long, or maybe not long enough, before you feel it shift. You're suddenly aware of his hand on your knee—when did it get there?—but his eyes are still locked on yours. You find that you aren't entirely surprised at all when his free hand comes up to cup your chin and his lips press to yours, softly. Hesitantly. And when he pulls back again, waiting to see if you shove him off of you, to stand up and walk away like you know you should, but you don't, you aren't surprised when he kisses you again, deeper this time, because this feels right, too. Like you'd known he was going to do this all along.

You curl your fingers through the hair at the nape of his neck as you kiss him back, and the soft sound of a groan into your mouth at your actions makes you feel far prouder than you probably should. In return, he squeezes at your knee, sliding his hand up your thigh to rest at your waist as you maneuver against him, practically sitting in his lap at this point.

The kisses turn more intense quickly, neither of you stopping until you're both left gasping against each other's lips, Changbin kneading at the skin of your waist reassuringly. But you don't miss the way his eyes flicker down to the waistband of your jeans, slowly moving a hand to gently rest over the button. "Is this okay?" he whispers, his warm breath cascading over your lips and making you shiver all the way from the top of your spine down. You know what he's asking.

But you know you shouldn't. For fuck's sake—there are four other men in the room, fast asleep on different couches and the floor, and you don't think you could ever look any of them in the eye again if they woke up to Changbin fucking you at what was supposed to be a movie night with friends. "Changbin," you start. "I don't know if we're—"

He guesses how the end of your sentence was going to go. "Hey," he reassures you. "If you want to, this doesn't have to be anything. No strings," he says, mimicking a pair of scissors cutting with the hand not currently resting on your stomach.

That hadn’t been what you’d meant, but you wish he'd said something like that when you'd known him back in high school. You should've known back then that Seo Changbin has never wanted an actual relationship with you—not in the way that you want. Used to want.

No, your mind corrects. Look at how quickly he's wrapped you around his finger again. You absolutely still want him, regardless of what had happened in the past—there's no point in lying to yourself anymore. Maybe it'll be different this time.

You know that's a mistake to think. It has to be. But the way you feel is the truth—a part of you has hoped, since that fateful moment in the parking lot nearly four years ago, now, that you'd end up in this exact situation, with Changbin wanting you again. You've tried to lie to yourself for years. But you still know this isn't healthy.

You kiss him as an answer anyway.

~~~

You'd thought it had been easy to fall into a friendly routine with Changbin before, fitting into each other's schedules to study or watch movies like you'd made your schedules for each other. Falling into a friends-with-benefits routine is almost easier—he eats you out before class, or you suck him off after an exam he'd been particularly worried about, or the two of you fuck in between note-taking sessions. It works surprisingly well, and you think again that this is the only way you and Changbin seem to be able to work. And you're happy with that, even if you can't stop that ping in your heart every time he leaves almost immediately after cleaning the two of you up.

Your roommate catches him walking out one day as she returns to your apartment from class, and you wince at the thought of having to explain whatever the hell you and Changbin are—you hope she'll find it slightly awkward and just avoid the subject altogether.

You have no such luck.

Saori raises an eyebrow before gesturing to the door behind her. "Who was that?"

"Changbin," you say plainly, as if that explains anything. "He's a friend from high school."

She stares at you for a beat too long. "Just a friend?"

You take a moment too long to answer, and she immediately crosses the room to plop on the couch next to you. "Spill. Now."

And you do—you think you may have needed to tell someone about all of this a long time ago, because it seems like once you start, you can't stop, seemingly talking for hours.

The only time Saori interrupts you is at the end—she can tell you just need to vent. "So...why do you like this guy, again?"

You almost laugh, but you think the fact that it takes you a moment to think of an answer is telling in and of itself. "I...I always looked up to him in high school. I still do now—he's so talented, and smart, and funny, and it feels like a miracle that he wants to keep someone like me around."

She frowns at that. "Someone like you?' Y/N, you're one of the most talented, smartest, and funniest people I know. You've got everything this guy has and then some. Why are you so convinced he's out of your league?"

That is something you don't have an answer for. "I think I'm just happy to have him around at all, whatever that means."

Her eyes widen with concern. "Y/N...there's no way you don't hear how that sounds." She lets out a shallow laugh. "He's funny and cool, maybe, but he's still just a guy. Come on. You deserve better than someone who just gets to pick and choose when you get to do anything. Having a friend with benefits is one thing, if it's truly 'no strings attached,' but it's not, is it?" she asks softly. "I don't think it's ever been."

You wish you had an answer for you why'd become so fixated on Changbin—why you were willing to let him treat you this way, why you were so willing to let him be oblivious to your feelings. But you don't have one. Your heart had picked him a long time ago, and it's refused to let go ever since. Affection apparently does ridiculous things to people, after all. "So...should I tell him? How I feel?"

Saori licks her lips nervously. "I think so. I think you should cut off the friends-with-benefits for sure—it's not fair to either of you since you're obviously on different pages about it. And you deserve someone better who won't just look past how you obviously feel."

You know she's right. You know what it is that you have to do.

You just don't know if you can do it.

~~~

Changbin texts you the next day that's he's coming over to work on homework. Of course, you know what that's code for (sitting between his legs while he reworks the same song for the seemingly thousandth time), but you're convinced you can tell him what you need to tell him, that it's time to end this weird, vicious cycle you've wrapped yourselves in because of your own feelings. At least, you hope you can.

But you can tell something is different from the moment he walks in the door to your apartment—there's a strangeness in the way he's carrying himself, in the set of his shoulders that you know you've never seen from him before.

You try to discard the observation, attributing it to your own nerves about the situation as he sets his backpack down beside the coffee table and pulls out his laptop, offering you a brief smile before getting to work.

You let him work in silence for a bit, going through your own pages of notes to summarize what you need to for the essay that's due next week, but you can't focus on any of it in the slightest, the words on the pages all swirling around in your mind and combining into one massive mess at the forefront of your thoughts.

You set down your notes, clearing your throat to speak just as Changbin takes his headphones off and sets them aside on the couch. "Y/N," he starts, shifting in his seat. "Do you mind if we talk for a minute?"

You nod, maybe too quickly. "Yeah, I—I actually wanted to talk to you today, too."

He nods. "Okay—great. I, um—there's no easy way to say this, is there?"

You feel a lump forming in your throat. No way.

"I...I'm not sure if we should do...this," he says, gesturing with one hand at the space in between the two of you, "anymore. It's completely my fault—I think I've made it to be something in my head that it's not. If you're okay with going back to being friends, that's fine, but if you're not, I'd totally understand, too."

You don't know what to say. You're in shock, frankly, and you feel like your mouth may even be comically hanging open.

He's breaking off the friends-with-benefits. He wouldn't even let you have the moment of getting to decide it for yourself.

The haze that you've felt over your mind about Changbin for the past several months finally, finally evaporates—you see your emotions clearly for the first time. You feel like a shaken-up bottle of soda, and his words are the catalyst that finally flick the cap off.

You speak, finally. "I'm sorry—you're breaking it off? You think this is unhealthy?" You scoff. "You've got to be fucking joking."

Changbin frowns. It's obviously not the response he thought he was going to get from you. "Y/N, I—"

You don't let him finish. "Changbin, I...I've been practically head over heels for you since high school. I let you treat me however you wanted because for whatever reason, my stupid brain picked you, of all people, to fixate on. I was fine with just being friends. I was fine with being your occasional fling, all because I just wanted to be around you—and you're the one who thinks this is unhealthy?" You let out a short laugh. "You're right. It is. And I should've seen that a long, long time ago. So if anyone's calling this thing off, it's me."

Changbin stares at you for a long, long time—you almost keep going with what you've said before, just to break the uncomfortable silence you've created, before he opens his mouth to speak again. "You...you've liked me? Since high school?"

You throw your hands in the air in exasperation. "Yes!" you say. "I thought that was obvious."

He slowly shakes his head from side to side. "Y/N....I thought you'd hated me, after how fucking immature I was senior year."

You let out a sigh. "I wanted to. Believe me, I really, really wanted to—but I didn't. I was mad at you for a while, sure, but I've never hated you."

Changbin's eyes still haven't left yours. "I...Y/N, the reason I wanted to call this off is because I like you. I didn't say anything because I didn't dare think you could ever feel the same way after how stupid I was in high school, just treating you as a rebound when you deserve so much better than that. I was surprised that you were okay being friends with benefits, but I never let myself think you'd ever want anything more than that."

It takes you a long time to process everything he's just said. "...What?" you whisper. You think about how long you've wanted him to say something like that—you wonder if this is all a dream. Is it something you really still want to hear from him? "Changbin, I was going to call off the friends-with-benefits today because I'm tired of liking you and not doing anything about it. I...I never would have ever guessed that you felt the same way." You let out a nervous laugh as you shake your head in disbelief. "Why are we so fucking bad at being honest with each other?"

Changbin lets out an uneasy laugh too. "I don't know. I just didn't want to fuck this up—I like you too much for that. I didn't ever want to push you past what you were comfortable with, but I...I guess I still did. Y/N—I'm so, so sorry."

You can't believe this. You really can't—but this is real. Changbin's sitting in front of you, right now, and he's saying something you never thought you'd hear him say in your entire lifetime. "What about back in high school?" you ask, trying to keep the sudden nervousness out of your voice. "When you told me you didn't think this would work, that you'd moved on from your ex too quickly...dammit, Changbin, why did you do anything to begin with?"

He winces. "Y/N—I should have apologized for that a long time ago. I pushed you away from me back then because I was scared. I was eighteen, and an idiot, and I'd just gotten out a relationship that had lasted way too long and...and I was falling for you. Really fast. And that scared me, so the only thing I could think to do was push you away where I couldn't hurt you."

You take in his words for a moment. You think about how you would have done anything for him to say something like that three years ago—but maybe that was immature, too. Is he different now? Are you? Certainly—but clearly neither of you are any better at communicating how you feel, too afraid to step on the other's toes.

You let out another sigh, your breath still shaky. "This is...insane, honestly. I wish we could just start over, somehow—undo whatever the hell this is that we've gotten ourselves into."

He nods. "I...I think we can do that. If that's something you want—I'd be more than willing to try."

You laugh. "Changbin, I really—"

But you look down to see Changbin's outstretched arm pointing towards you before you can say anything else. "Hi," he says. "My name's Changbin. I like you."

You stare at his hand in utter disbelief—disbelief that he's doing this, disbelief that the two of you have gotten to this point that you never thought you'd get to—for only a moment before you clasp his hand in yours. "I'm Y/N," you say, decidedly. "I like you too."

It seems stupidly comical for the situation you've found yourselves in—but you both dissolve into laughter within an instant, mostly out of relief. "God, Y/N," Changbin says, running a hand through his hair. "I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry. If you can forgive me for being so stupid, I...I'll be amazed, honestly, but—I promise I'll be better. I'll do everything I can to be better."

You take a deep breath. "I need to be better, too," you say honestly. "I should've been upfront about how I felt so we didn't get into this mess of trying not to make the other person uncomfortable, even if we both felt the same way. If...if you want to try again, I'll do everything I can to be better, too."

Changbin nods. "I...I think you deserve better than me," he says, swallowing uneasily.

He's probably right. "I know," you say, and his expression doesn't change. "But for whatever reason, I don't want better than you. I still just want you."

The relief in his eyes is palpable as he lets a small, soft smile appear on his lips at your words. "Y/N...I know we just met," he says, his smile growing slightly wider at his own joke, "but—can I kiss you?"

You smile at him, too. "So forward," you tease, biting back a smile. "But yes, man I just met—you can kiss me."

That grin widens ever so slightly before he cups your cheek with his palm, leaning in to press his lips to yours. He kisses you, but it doesn't feel at all like that kiss you'd shared in Jisung's living room—rather, the soft touch of his lips to yours feels like that first kiss you'd ever had with him, on the couch of your childhood home, where you'd been so hopeful of what the future with him held.

You know that was foolish, now—but that was then. Now, that you're both older, better, smarter (maybe), determined to make a change and actually tell each other the things you feel when you feel them—you feel a new kind of hope for what you could have with Changbin.

Regardless of that, you still can't believe that you'd psyched yourself up last night to break your friends-with-benefits situation off with him, and now you're kissing him softly on your couch. "This doesn't feel real," you admit to him.

He grins at you. "It's real."

You shake your head, biting back a grin. "I don't believe you."

Changbin laughs at that. "You don't believe me? Damn. I guess I'll have to do something to make you believe this is real, then," he says, crashing his lips against yours again, gently winding his fingers through your hair and pulling you close to him, and he doesn't pull back away until both of you are gasping for breath.

"Well?" he asks, and you'd almost forgotten about what you'd started. "Did that feel real?"

You smile coyly, shaking your head. "No," you whisper. "I think I'm going to need a little more convincing than that."

You practically see the switch flip in his head when he finally, finally catches your meaning. "Hmm," he says, pretending to mull it over. "Let me see what I can do about that." Before you can blink, he's slid one hand under your knees and the other around your shoulders, lifting you into his arms with ease before he makes his way into your bedroom, tossing you haphazardly onto your bed before he crawls beside you, meeting your lips once more.

This is already decidedly different, and it warms your heart instantly—he’s only been in your room once or twice before, anyway. Your hookups before have almost always been in less-than traditional places, somewhere the two of you could get off quickly and hide the evidence quicker—a couch, his desk, that one time against the wall—but this is different. It's a small, minute difference, but it's practically night and day to you. It's a sign that this might be different.

So you kiss him back again, holding tighter to his arms above you as his hands slide down your body to tug at your hips. You feel him laugh softly when you shiver at the feeling of his hands on you, but his hands hover at the hem of your shirt—an unspoken question, but you know what he's asking. You take hold of his wrists and guide his hands under your shirt, and both of you let out a moan that feels positively electric as his hands skim your bare skin, running their way up to your chest and gently cupping, circling your nipples with his thumb before you tilts your head back against the pillow behind you, sighing into his mouth.

Changbin moves one of his hands out from under your shirt, feeling your breath on his fingers when he cups your chin with two fingers and brings your gaze back to his. "You're so beautiful, Y/N," he says.

He’s said this before, but you’ve never looked at each other this way, or for this long. There’s meaning behind what you feel now, not just unspoken hopes behind empty words, and that’s why your face flushes pink at his words, enough to bring a wider smile to his face at the reaction.

You lean your head to the side enough to kiss the inside of his wrist before he pulls his arm away. “You’re beautiful too, you know,” you say, and he grins back at you as his hands trail back down to the hem of your shirt, playing with the fabric gently. When he tugs it over your head, you let him, and you yank at the collar of his own shirt before he’s laughing, pulling his own shirt off to join yours on the floor beside your bed, just like how both of your pants and underwear follow until you’re both bare before each other—which, again, shouldn’t be anything new for either of you. It isn’t, frankly, but there is something new in the atmosphere, and you know he feels it too. There’s none of your usual hurriedness to disrobe each other, to get everything started as soon as possible so it can be over as soon possible, too—instead, his hands on yours are unbearably tender, rubbing over the skin of your arms, legs, and stomach softly like it’s the first time he’s ever touched you. You’re vulnerable underneath him in a way you’ve never been before—he knows your heart, now, and you know his.

He doesn’t stop the tender touches, squeezing reassuringly at your hips while he gives soft bites to the skin of your thighs, smoothing over the skin with his tongue before moving to where he knows you want him—where you need him. You shiver just at the feeling of his breath between your legs, and you know he can feel it when he smirks up at you. “You okay?” he asks teasingly.

You roll your eyes. “I should be, unless you keep taking your sweet time down—ah!” You cut yourself off inadvertently when he lays the flat of his tongue against you, licking one long stripe up your slit.

You feel him laugh quietly against you, the vibrations of his voice against your cunt enough to make you squeeze your thighs together, but he’s wrapping both arms around both your legs and pushing them further apart before you can even protest.

You cry out when he moves ever so slightly further upward, sucking hard at your clit that doesn’t take him any time at all to find, now—he knows your body so well, even if his hands on your skin are as gentle as if it’s your first time. It’s not long before he lets go of one of your thighs, moving a hand down so he can slip a finger, then two beside his tongue, pushing and curling in and out at an achingly slow pace to get you to beg for him—and you do.

“Ngh—Changbin,” you pant, grasping the ends of his hair in your hand. “Please.”

He increases the speed of his fingers ever so slowly as he pulls his mouth away from you, breath ghosting over your pussy. “You want me to make you come, sweet girl?”

You shake your head. You’ve never said no to him before, that’s for sure, but you can’t wait any longer. You need him inside of you—now. “Want you,” you manage to get out. “Need you inside of me.”

Changbin lets out a deep exhale. “Fuck, Y/N,” he groans as he pulls himself above you. “You really always know what to say.”

You very nearly laugh at that before you see him stroking himself once, twice, taking his bottom lip in his teeth with a hiss at the sight of you before lining his member up with your entrance. It’s a stretch you’ve grown accustomed to, certainly, but it still burns slightly as he pushes into you, watching your face when he finally bottoms out, hips against yours while he waits for you to tell him he can move.

You nod, wordlessly, and he leans down to land a quick kiss to your nose before he finally, finally starts to move inside of you. He starts at that same teasing pace as before, obviously enjoying the look of frustration on your face as you grasp at his shoulders. “What is it, Y/N?” he asks sweetly, grinning at you while he slowly fucks into you.

“‘Bin,” you gasp out when he just barely misses that spot inside of you that usually makes you see stars—and you know he’s doing it on purpose, too. Bastard. “Fuck me. Please.”

You see his grin drop almost immediately, clenching his jaw at your words and the nickname that you know drives him wild. “Baby,” he starts, grabbing a hold of the sheets on either side of your head as he starts fucking into you faster, rolling his hips into you the way he knows you like. “If you ask like that, I’ll never say no.”

Just the sight of him like this has you near the edge—none of that usual hurried nature, his eyebrows knit together as he tries to focus on being quiet enough so the two of you can make it last as long as possible—no, now he’s looking at you like you’re the only person in the world, like you hung the stars in the sky, the same stars that you see in his adoring eyes now.

You can only take so much of his beautifully intense gaze, though, paired with the bruising pace he starts to keep up between your legs, and you turn your head to the side in an attempt to muffle your moans against the pillow beside you.

Changbin, of course, will have absolutely none of that. He lets go of the sheets on one side to grab your chin again, tilting your head back towards his face, keeping you you from looking away. “Nuh-uh,” he chides, tightening his grip on your chin ever so slightly. “Let me see your pretty face like this, while you’re being so good for me.”

You let out another moan at his words, especially when he moves his other hand down to draw tight, slick circles on your clit. “Fuck,” you gasp, digging your fingers into his shoulders, pulling him as close to you as you can manage. “Feels so good—Changbin—”

He’s heard that warning tone in your voice enough to know what it means. “Feels so good for me too, baby—shit. I can’t believe I get to have you like this,” he groans as you tighten around him. “All mine.”

You are his—have been for probably longer than either of you knows. So you nod. “I’m yours,” you repeat, and you think his eyes nearly darken immediately at the admission. He swallows, nodding too.

“Mine.”

The sound of his skin slapping against yours fills the room, as crude as ever, but you can’t find it in yourself to care, no, not as his deft fingers speed up their ministrations against your clit while he continues to fuck you as hard as he can, coiling that pleasure below your stomach into a tight knot until you finally feel it snap with a cry of his name, shuddering as you arch your back against him—and Changbin isn’t far behind you, grabbing one side of your waist hard enough that you know you’ll have marks tomorrow as he thrusts back into you three, four more times before he reaches his own climax, stilling inside of you.

For a brief instant, you halfway expect him to pull out, clean the two of you up quickly, and leave for his own apartment the way he has before—but he doesn’t. Changbin lies there, on top of you with his forehead pressed lightly to yours, him softening inside of you for a few beautiful, quiet moments—at least, until you think you might stop breathing if he doesn’t get off of you. You shove at him lightly, but he gets the message, grinning against you before he rolls over to one side, keeping an arm slung around you while he gazes at the ceiling, the both of you slowly catching your breath in gradual exhales.

Now this, certainly, is different. You’d never let yourself lay in the afterglow with him like this, too afraid of the conclusions your hopeless romantic brain would draw if you let him hold you as you both came down from your highs, but he never stayed around very long afterwards, either. Now you know it may have very well been for the same reason.

He kisses the crown of your hair before pulling back to meet your gaze once more. “What are you doing tomorrow night?”

You almost feel like you’ve gotten whiplash from the question, seemingly coming out of nowhere. “What?”

Changbin’s grin widens slightly. “Can I take you out? On a real date? If you…you know, still want to try this.”

Oh. You laugh softly, feeling every worry you’ve had dissipate like a puddle under the warm sun. “Yes, Changbin. I’ll go out with you.”

He makes a show of wiping imaginary sweat from his brow. “Thank goodness.”

You continue to lay there, gazing at each other in an unbelievably loving way for longer than you could have ever anticipated Changbin to have the patience for—but you don’t feel uncomfortable under that gaze at all, occasionally moving a hand to comb through his hair as he strokes a thumb over your cheek.

You suppose you have no real way of knowing if this will be better than how your relationship with Changbin has been before—he’s said he’ll be better. You’ve said you’ll be better. What else can you go off of? All you can do, you think, is hope that you—the both of you—are better. That you’ll both do better for each other. It’s what you both deserve.

And as you feel his heartbeat slow down against you, his hands gently stroking the small of your back while he holds you as close to his chest as he can, you feel more optimistic about your chances of this—this beginning, the ending of the old chapter and the start line of a decidedly new one—occurring than you have in a long, long time.

taglist: @petrichor-han @kangroo-chan @ot7lonelylover @lilacdreams-00 @mainexiii @awkwardnesshabitat @lotus-dly @elizabeth11moreno @nerdysl-t @quinnsmindpalace

©️ noramoons 2021-2022. do not translate or reupload my writing.

#stray kids oneshot #stray kids smut #stray kids angst #changbin x reader #stray kids x reader #skz x reader #skz smut #skz angst #changbin smut #changbin angst #stray kids fic #skz fic #seo changbin x reader #seo changbin smut #seo changbin angst #beck writes ✍️

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yangbbokari · 4 months

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If…

Pairing: any skz member x gn!reader Genre: Angst no comfort WC: 1.?k(I’ll fix it when I get home) Warnings: Cursing, yelling, self-harm, death, crying, reader referred to as y/n and member referred to as (name) Summary: Of all the questions you’ve asked him, he wished he answered truthfully A.N.: Just some thoughts I had !NOT PROOFREAD! As always

He’s regretted every thing he’s ever said leading up to this moment. He hoped you didn’t take him seriously but you did. Now he had to suffer the consequences. Alone. ~~~

You loved him, you did. And you tried to show it all the time. But maybe love wasn’t made for you in this life.

As your tired boyfriend trudged through the door, you looked over at him with worry in your eyes.

“If you’re hungry I can warm up some food for you.”

“I’m fine. I already ate with my coworkers. I’m not that hungry.”

He made his way to your shared bedroom without saying another word. You stood up and yelled out to him.

“If you need a bath I have one set for you. With your favorite scent and bubbles!” You smiled, sure you’d get his favor this time.

“I’m just going to take a quick shower. I’m too tired for a bath. You want me to drown?” He yelled back.

You felt your heart begin to crack apart. “Oh, okay. Well… If you need anything just call for me.”

With a loud and clear sigh, your boyfriend yelled at you. “If I needed something then I would call for you! Quit being annoying and shut the fuck up.”

A small and quiet, ‘oh’, left your lips as you sat back down, holding in your tears. This was a side never shown in your relationship so it left you feeling quite shocked.

So you blamed it on stress.

But over the next few months, the cycle repeated. He’d come home and yell at you. Each and every time.

Each day your heart cracked a little more until he stepped on it and it shattered completely.

In the middle of a heated argument, you yelled at him and he yelled back.

“If you really love me that you wouldn’t treat me like this!”

“Well maybe I don’t love you as much as I initially thought!”

You went quiet. You just turned around and went back to cooking dinner. He ignored you for the rest of the week and he never apologized. So you did.

“Baby, I’m so sorry for how I acted the other day. I was just feeling a bit insecure.”

“I don’t care. Just never act like that again.”

You nodded your head in shame as he brushed past you. Slowly, your ‘if’s’ became ‘sorry’s.’ ~~~ Your boyfriend came storming through the door, shutting it loudly behind him, causing you to jump.

He looks at the table, then looks at you.

“Where the fuck is my dinner? God, y/n. You always claim to have this and that; and the one time I want it, YOU NEVER HAVE IT!!!”

You scrambled to your feet, rushing to the kitchen. “I’m sorry, baby. I’ll get it done right now. Just take a shower and before you know it, dinner will be done.”

He huffed his breath before making his way to the bedroom. He came back out, stomping.

“What the fuck, Y/n! You don’t have dinner ready but you can’t even prepare me a fucking bath!? God, you’re so fucking useless. I don’t even know why I ever started liking you in the first place!”

You sighed heavily. “I’m sorry. I’ve just been out of it today.”

“Clearly! Now if you don’t have dinner done by the time I come out, don’t expect me to stay here tonight.” And he went to shower.

“Sorry…” ~~~ It began to get too much for you. You couldn’t take it. It was overwhelming and heartbreaking. You missed the old (name) you used to know. You just wanted him back.

You slowly stepped in the bath and settled down before calling (name). He picked up. Surprisingly.

“What do you want, Y/n? You already know how busy I am. It better not be any bullshit.”

“I just want to ask you a few questions.” You voice wavered and you hoped he couldn’t tell that you were crying.

“Well, then get it over with.”

You took in a deep shaky breath.

“If I left you, how would you feel.”

“I don’t know, y/n. Ask me when I get home.”

“WAIT! P-please just listen… I just need you to listen as I ask.”

After a moment of silence, you continued.

“If you could never see me again, would that hurt you? If I died, would you care?”

You could hear a loud sigh coming from the receiving end.

“I don’t know. You act like you’re dying. I’m hanging up. I’m tired of you.”

*beeeeeeeeeeeeppp-* ~~~ When the call ended, (name) didn’t know what to do. He grew a bit worried. He knew he shouldn’t have talked to y/n like that. Work’s just been taking a toll on him and he took it all out on y/n.

He knew you should’ve apologized but his ego stood in the way so he never did.

But he couldn’t shake that horrible feeling that something terrible would happen. So he grabbed his coat, locked his office door, got in his car, and drove off. ~~~ The call ended. Any hope left that you had, hoping (name) still loved you, gone.

You grabbed the box cutter from the side of the tub. Tears blinded your vision and your pained sobs could be heard from miles away.

“I’m sorry, mom. I promised I wouldn’t join you so soon. But it hurts. It hurts so much. I don’t know if I can take it anymore. I can’t take it anymore. I’m tired. I don’t want to hold on anymore.”

You sobbed even harder as you slid the blade out. “I’m sorry that I love you, (name).”

Then you slit your wrist.

You could feel the blood dripping from it. It was warm like the water you were currently in. You felt your body slowly become colder as you heart beated rapidly. Your eyes began to droop and your breath became ragged.

You saw your memories come flashing by. Most of them being the happy memories you shared with (name). You smiled. You were dying and you smiled. At least the pain was ending and you no longer had to hurt. You guessed this was what people meant when they said that your life flashes before your eyes as you die.

You looked down and the water had become red already. The blood was sill draining from your body.

Then you heard someone burst through the door. You couldn’t tell who it was and you could barely hear them as they lifted you from the tub. ~~~ (Name) rushed into the house and he had to break through the bathroom door when you weren’t responding.

“Y/N!!! Oh, god. Y/n…”

He wanted to scream but he knew he had to stay calm. He was scared. This was all his fault.

“Y/n, y/n baby. Stay with me, yeah. It’s okay. It’s okay. I’ll get you out of here soon.”

He grabbed a face cloth and wrapped around your wrist to stop any further bleeding. Then he lifted you up and out of the tub.

“It’s okay, love. It’s okay, I’m here. You’ll be alright. Everything will be just fine.”

He wasn’t sure if he was saying that for you or for him, but it worked. What he was sure of though, was that he was thankful that y’all chose an apartment not to far from the hospital. About a 5 minute drive.

He rushed you to the hospital and they hooked you up but it was already too late.

You died as they were trying to put you on the hospital bed and give you blood. You were gone.

You were gone and you left (name) all alone.

He couldn’t believe it. He knew that he was the reason and the guilt ate at him. He already promised your mother to take care of you and he couldn’t even do that. He hated himself. He hated all of it.

“If you can hear me, I’m so sorry, y/n.”

#Skz angst #skz fanfic #yangbbokari #Mumu writes #skz imagines #skz scenarios #skz drabbles #bang chan #lee know #seo changbin angst #hwang hyunjin #lee felix #yang jeongin #kim seungmin #skz x reader #skz x y/n #skz x you #skz x stay

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red-airhead · 9 months

Text

𝓙𝓾𝓼𝓽 𝓣𝓱𝓮 𝓦𝓪𝔂 𝓨𝓸𝓾 𝓐𝓻𝓮 | 𝓢𝓮𝓸 𝓒𝓱𝓪𝓷𝓰𝓫𝓲𝓷 |

Masterlist

word count - 2,348

genre - fluff, romance

warnings - idol!changbin, he goes all out, afab! reader, feminine terms, changbin is emotional, reader is emotional, mf sings a song for you, use of pet names (baby, darling, love, muse), lmk if i missed anything.

the ring

the dress he picked out

“There’s a very pretty girl in the crowd! Can we get her up here?”

It made your heart pound for a second. You were so surprised by Changbin’s words as he stared at you, pointing you out.

You were at a fan meet for your boyfriend of 4 years, and while it was hard to be in a relationship with him as an idol and it being public, you never let it stop you from loving him unconditionally.

Everyone in the crowd already seemed to know who they were talking about as they all squealed, and the two fans beside you shook your shoulders and squealed about it.

Your ears felt like they were ringing from it, but you couldn’t help but smile shyly from all the attention. It makes you nervous to know what he had planned, but not even most of the members knew what he was doing so it surprised them as well.

-flashback-

“Darling, you’re coming to the fan meet right?” Changbin had asked you from the kitchen. You were sitting on the couch, setting up the snacks on the table that was set out for movie night.

“Yeah! Why are you asking?”

“I just wanted to make sure.” He replied, walking out with the freshly made hot chocolate you loved so dearly.

“Well, it’s good that you were confirming, because if you left without me I would’ve been more than concerned.” You teased, watching him set down the cups of hot chocolate, just before pressing a gentle kiss on your lips.

He sat down next to you and got bundled up in the blankets with you, starting whatever action movie you had put in. You had a little jar with popsicle sticks that had different genres of movies, and it was his turn to pick so he got lucky and got action.

You rested against Changbin’s chest as you watched the movie, occasionally shifting to take a sip of your hot chocolate or to get some of the snacks that were set out, Changbin would also ask you to feed him or hand him his cup of hot chocolate.

Hearing his phone go off, Changbin sat up as he checked his messages. You saw the contact name but not what it had said. It was from Felix, which isn’t out of the ordinary, but he seemed to be smiling at his phone excitedly before shooting a text back and setting his phone face down.

“What was that about?”

“Oh! He just had something to confirm with me.”

“And you smiled because..?”

“He worded it weirdly, it was hard to understand it for a second.”

He then pulled you into his arms, squeezing you lightly as you got comfortable again.

“Are you gonna dress all pretty for me for the fan meet?” He asked after 20 minutes of silence, he usually never asked what you were wearing so it made you a little confused.

“I’m not sure yet.. You wanna forget this movie and figure something out?” You suggested, looking up at Changbin with an excited expression. He quickly smiled at you and nodded, sitting up and pausing the movie, taking another sip of his hot chocolate as he stood up and stretched.

“C’mon, muse, we don’t got all night!” He hummed excitedly, quickly helping you up. You were amused with his excitement, and you certainly didn’t mind how happy he was acting too.

“You’re more excited than ever, aren’t you baby?”

“Well yeah! I get to pick your outfit this time!” He responded so quickly that it almost gave you whiplash as you walked to your shared bedroom.

The next 15 minutes were him going through an abundance of your dresses. He’d have you try them on and then he’d say no to almost every single one, until you got to a specific floral print light pink dress. The moment he saw it on you he fawned and quickly said yes to it.

“Yes to the dress?”

“Yes to the fucking dress!”

-end of flashback-

You sat at your chair in the room as he began walking towards you. You stared at him with the biggest smile on your face.

This wasn’t the first time he’s done this, but it felt different this time, like there was a bigger meaning behind this.

“Will you take my hand and follow me please?” He said into the mic, holding out his free hand, in which you gently nodded and took that hand, standing up carefully as you fixed your dress after sitting for so long.

So many fans squealed and started taking pictures of the two of you. You knew that it would be all over the internet by the end of the fan meet but you didn’t mind. The fans seemed to love you.

With his mic down, you looked at him as he walked back to the mini stage where the long table was, “Binnie what are you doing?”

“It’s a surprise, love. You’ll see.” He whispered to you, standing off to the side with an arm now around your waist, holding you close.

While it was a strange thing for Changbin to ask you to come up, it wasn’t unusual, so the other members just went about goofing off. He often walked away to join the others just before going back to press a kiss on your cheek or forehead.

You watched the others in amusement, seeing how they seemed so energetic and happy.

Deciding to check your phone for a little while, you were now distracted, so that meant it was almost time. Changbin had left your side to whisper to Felix, in which Felix nodded and whispered to Jeongin, who the smiled and nodded excitedly and told Minho, Chan, and Hyunjin, who all three then turned to Han, whispering to him to get the staff to change the music in a few minutes.

Han then ran off to the back to go inform staff about the plan, who seemed to be in it as well.

You really must’ve been drowned into your phone because you didn’t even notice Felix coming up to you to talk to you.

“Y/N! It's so nice to finally see you again. I was gonna come over earlier but I got distracted.” He explained, in which you put your phone away and nodded quickly.

“Oh no, it’s okay! I get that you’re probably having fun so I don’t mind. How have you been?” You had asked, your attention now turned to Felix.

Changbin was with the others, basically huddled. Felix was your distraction now, because Changbin was getting the ring ready along with humming the words to the song he was getting ready to sing.

Originally he asked Han and Jeongin, but he felt like this was something that he needed to sing.

Han showed up after 10 minutes and quickly went to Changbin.

“It’s all set up, so whenever you’re ready.” He whispered, in which Changbin nodded and cleared his throat.

While you were so immersed in the conversation you were having with Felix, You couldn’t help but turn your attention to Changbin who seemed to have a giddy and nervous smile on his face.

You slowly stopped in the middle of your sentence as you smiled at him. He looked so cute to you that you couldn’t help but smile, and especially when he was getting ready to speak.

“So as you all know, Y/N has been my muse for about 4 years now, and you all have been nothing but supportive to the two of us.” He started, him signaling Felix to start nudging you towards the center, and while you complied, you were still so confused. Changbin met you there, pressing a kiss to your nose.

“You also all know how happy I am with her, and with how much I talk about her on bubble I think that's pretty noticeable.” He stood facing you, watching you smile at him and look at him with those eyes he loved so much. He watched as you looked at him with such love and admiration that he was so excited now.

“I have a little song to sing to the love of my life, and I hope that you’ll enjoy it. I hope that she will enjoy it too.” He added, and it caused you to giggle. Is this what felt different?

He then looked over to a staff member who then changed the song… Just The Way You Are, your guys’ song.

He began to sing the song with the confidence you loved so much. You watched as he moved around and sang. He watched you giggle and watch with excitement.

Your cheeks had started to get red as he performed. Fans were recording and watching in awe. Of course none of them knew what was going on, so they all thought you two were just being your usual couple self.

Through the whole song, you didn’t even notice the guys all watching with admiration, seeing how healthy and adorable you both looked together.

It was so hard not to look away from Changbin, and he knew you enjoyed every bit of what was happening, but one thing he was nervous about was the official proposal.

How would you react? He knew you’d be happy but how happy would you be?

After a few seconds, he had finished the song. He let the fans cheer as he held your hand gently, staring back at you with just as much admiration and love.

He tilted the mic to you a little after the fans finished.

“Thank you Binnie, it was such a beautiful performance.” You said gently into the mic, in which all the fans awed at you.

He turned the mic back to him, Felix then speaking up, “While it was a beautiful performance, there’s just one more thing that he has for you.” He smiled at you, in which you were now confused. It wasn’t just a performance.

And with a shaky sigh, Changbin began his little speech.

“Y/N-” He paused for a moment, thinking about the words he had just looked over, “I’ve been,, nothing but happy these past 4 years with you.” He smiled as he spoke, and you smiled in return.

You squeezed his hand with reassurance, and that helped him relax.

“The members can vouch for it, the fans can too. They all see how happy I’ve been ever since I decided to ask you to be my girlfriend. Every moment with you has been such a memorable moment.” He took a deep breath, shifting his grip on the mic he held in his hand.

“I tell you every morning that you look beautiful, even if you haven’t gotten out of bed. I tell you every evening that you look just as beautiful as you did that morning, and I want to keep reminding you that you’re everything to me. I’ve seen you, the real you, and you’re perfect.”

You mouthed a little thank you to his sweet compliment, heart fluttering at the words falling from his lips.

“You showed me what it’s like to love so hard you forget everything, You’ve given me everything I could’ve ever asked for from a person, and you’ve done so much for me that it’s so hard not to give back.” He let go of your hand to reach for the velvet box in his back pocket.

“I’ve been thinking about these,, moments in our lives. The moment when we grow old and look back, or when we get married, have kids, and tell our kids all about the life we had together.” He was stalling, he was so nervous and you could tell.

He cleared his throat as he held the velvet box in his hand, “But that’s not what I want to think about.. What I want to think about is.. What will you say.” He shifted, carefully getting on one knee and looking up at you.

Oh how badly did you want to start crying. Your heart raced, tears threatening from your eyes.

Was this really happening?

Changbin kept quiet for a moment, letting the fans squealing die down. The fans were so excited for this, and it was shown from the amount of squealing and cheers for Changbin to go on.

“I love you, Just the way you are.. You’re amazing and I want you to remember that when you look at this ring.. Darling you have been nothing but good to me, and I want to be just as good to you..” He could feel tears brimming at his eyes as he sniffled, a couple of tears falling. That made you start crying as your hands covered your mouth.

“Y/N, I really want to be just as happy as I am with us being boyfriend and girlfriend.. I want to be even happier as Husband and Wife,, if you’d let me?” He swallowed thickly, opening the box to reveal such a beautiful ring.

“Will you marry me, my muse?” He said shakily, setting down the mic on the floor just after turning it off.

You cried for a little while longer as everyone got ready for your answer.

You couldn’t even form words, and when you tried to speak you stammered and hiccuped.

“Ch-Chang— Changbin..”

He waited anxiously, but patiently.

You sobbed gently, and while you wanted to say it in words, you just couldn’t.

So you nodded. You nodded frantically and quickly.

Fans screamed and cheered at this, in which he quickly took the ring out of the box and slipped it on your left ring finger. He was about to stand up but your knees had given out and you came crashing down. He sat on the floor as he pulled you into a warm embrace for a short moment before pulling you into a loving kiss. The first one you’d share in front of fans.

His touch was so gentle, and you had practically drowned out all the cheering.

This was definitely going to be all over the internet.

#stray kids #stray kids angst #stray kids smut #stray kids comfort #stray kids fluff #seo changbin #seo changbin hurt #seo changbin fluff #seo changbin angst #seo changbin smut #changbin #stray kids hurt

47 notes · View notes

his-angell · 8 months

Text

Strike 3. (s.cb)

plot; You never had a good relationship with your parents. So when they invited you to a family dinner, you were unsure of whether to go or not. Changbin said you should at least try. So you did. You went. But you end up wishing you hadn't.

pairing; Seo Changbin x fem!reader

genre; angst, comfort

word count; 2.7k

warnings; mentally abusive parents, weight insecurity, knifes cause cooking is mentioned, one small blood mention, alcohol mention, trauma reminders, cursing, established relationship, description of panic attack, crying, pet names

request; no

----------------------------------------------------

As you stared at your phone, your thumbs hovered over the keyboard. Your mother had texted the night prior, her text reading, “We’re having a family dinner at home tomorrow. We would like you to come.”. Which would have been great and all, if you had a good relationship with them.

Ever since you were young, your parents were hard on you. Always belittling you for such small things. Praising your older brother, since he seemed to be getting further than you were. You were always jealous of the way he was treated. He always got the praise and love you never got.

When you brought it up to Changbin, he said you should go. He knew of the way they used to treat you. But he assumed maybe this dinner was gonna be different. That this was their redemption. So with some convincing, you finally agreed. So here you sat, texting your mother a simple, “I’ll be there.”

You didn’t wear anything special. Looking at yourself in the long way mirror you and Changbin had in your room. You wore one of his white hoodies, black cargo pants and your converse. You weren’t gonna try and impress them. You didn’t wanna seem like a try hard.

You sighed as you grabbed your phone and lanyard which held your keys. You walked over to Changbin who was cleaning up the kitchen. “I’m heading out.” You said as you leaned up to kiss his cheek. “Alright, tell me when you're on your way home, yeah?” He turned to you. You nodded and gave a soft kiss to his lips.

As you walked out, you heard him call out. “I love you!” You giggled a bit. “Love you most!” With that, you headed out. As you walked to your car, you were really contemplating if you wanted to go or not. But you guessed you had already made your choice when you texted your mother back. You sighed as you got in, starting the car.

You drove in silence, needing time to mentally prepare for what was to come. You parked on the side of the road in front of the house. You turned off the car, stuffing your phone and keys in your pocket, the my melody lanyard hanging out. You walked up to the door, slowly holding your fist up to knock.

It was only a few seconds before your brother opened the door. He stared for a second. “You look fancy.” He said sarcastically. “Yeah, thanks.” You rolled your eyes as you walked into the house. You gave a small smile to your mother who came to greet you.

You bowed your head and hugged her. “Hi momma.” You said quietly. “Hi, Jagi.” She said back, leaning back to cup your cheeks. She pinched at them. “You’ve gotten some extra chub to your cheeks.” She said, huffing disappointedly. You frowned. “Oh- I..” You just cleared your throat, knowing better than to talk back.

Your father was next to walk to greet you. Except there was a noticeable grimance on his face. “You look lazy.” He motioned to your outfit. “Yeah. It's to hide all that weight she gained.” Your brother leaned against the wall.

Strike one. Did you really look that bad? “Sorry.” You bowed your head down, holding it as a deep apology. “Anyways! Come help me with dinner, dear!” Your mother patted your head. Your father and brother headed out to the living room.

As your mum explained to you what you were gonna be doing, you nodded. You were gonna be cutting the vegetables for the salad. She handed you a knife and you began to cut the vegetables.

You seemed to be zoned out, because as you were cutting, you cut your finger pretty good. “Aishh! Shibal-!” You cried out, dropping the knife onto the cutting board. You whimpered as you held your bleeding hand over the sink.

Your father whipped around, glaring at you from the other side of the bar counter. “Don’t you curse in my house!” He yelled, gripping the glass of whiskey in his hand. You opened your mouth to speak when you were slapped upside the head making you wince.

“You know better! That is unlady like! It's disgusting!” Your mother spat at you. You looked at your brother as he chuckled, leaning back in his chair, sipping at his glass of whiskey. “You need to grow up, dude. It's a small cut.” He scoffed. You clenched your jaw.

Strike two. You stormed out of the kitchen, rushing to the bathroom. You cupped your hand below your finger, attempting not to drip any blood anywhere. Once you got to the bathroom, you closed the door with your foot. You held your hand in the sink and let cold water run over it.

You felt your eyes get fuzzy as you let the water run. Nothing changed.. It was the same thing when you were younger. Walking in crying, having scraped your knee on the pavement. You were told to grow up. You weren’t dying. You weren’t broken. Get over it.

Never did you get a kiss better. A mother to hush your cries as she bandages your knee with a bandage and neosporin. You took a deep breath. You shook your head, blinking back your tears. You grabbed the first aid kit from under the sink and began taking care of your finger.

You picked up your mess, putting the kit away and looking at yourself in the mirror. You wiped your eyes and huffed. You walked out of the bathroom to see the table set and ready, your parents and brother sitting down.

“Took you long enough.” Your father scolded. “Sorry, dad.” You apologized as you sat down. It was normal to let the men at the table grab their food first. Then your mother, then you. You started to put food on your plate. “Should you be eating that much?” Your brother spoke, mouthfill of food.

You sighed, placing the main course back in its bowl, just sitting with salad on your plate. You weren’t really hungry now.. So you picked at the food on your plate. There was only so much patience left before you hit strike three.. You were like a ticking bomb.

You stared at your plate, waiting for someone to start a conversation. As if on cue, your mother spoke. “Are you still working as a kindergarten teacher, (y/n)?” She asked. You pursed your lips before nodding. “Yeah. I like it there. The kids are the sweetest.” You forced a small smile.

“Aishh.. So disappointing.” Your father tutted. You looked at him. “You know, your brother is climbing the family company chain. He's about to be vice president next month.” He praised the male. tick tick tick…

You nodded a little. “Good job.” You nodded to your brother. “Thanks,” He shook his head a bit. You grabbed your glass of water, taking a sip from it. “Are you still dating that Changbin guy?” Your mother asked, covering her mouth as she chewed her food.

This might be better. They were asking about your lovely boyfriend! You smiled a bit and nodded. “Yeah! We’re about to hit our four year anniversary.” You said proudly. You faltered though when your brother cackled.

“Wait, you mean that idiot in the band? The one who got mad at the last dinner we had?” He pointed. You glanced down. “He wasn’t mad. He just wasn’t comfortable with how you were treating me,” You said matter of factly. “Don’t you dare talk back to your brother like that!” Your father raised his voice. tick tick tick…

You balled your fists, your leg beginning to bounce under the table. “You’re so dramatic, jagi. We treat you just fine.” Your mother said. You scoffed. “Yeah, do you?” You said, your fuse getting smaller by the second. “Yes, we do.” She shot a glare at you. tick tick tick…

You stared her dead in the eye. “You guys belittle me like i'm a bug!” You laughed in disbelief. “Not true, (y/n). Like your mother said, you're just being dramatic.” Your father piped in. “It's your stupid boyfriend. He's putting lies into your head to make us look bad.” Your brother spat. tick tick tick…

You stared at all them in utter disbelief. “You're joking! You did nothing but belittle me all night. The second I got here, you degraded me!” You raised your voice. “And you praise him like he's so much better than me!” You pointed at your brother. tick tick tick..

“Because he is better than you!!” Your father yelled. BOOM.

You shot up from your chair. Your stormed out of the house, slamming the door. The tears in your eyes stung. Your chest was tight. You got in your car and started it, immediately driving home.

As you walked in the door, Changbin could already read your body language. The way you angrily untied your shoes, throwing them on the floor once they were off your feet. The way you tossed your keys on the counter instead of hanging them up. He looked at you as you just walked to your room with not even a hello.

You shut the door of your shared bedroom. You didn’t even make it to the bed before your legs gave out, sending you straight to the floor. All of what you held back in the car was coming out now. Your chest was tight and you couldn’t catch your breath.

Your lips became tingly and dry as you clutched your chest. A choked cry escaped your lips as you closed your eyes tightly. Your head was so heavy. You felt as if you were gonna vomit. You gripped onto the hoodie, coughing as you choked on sobs.

You were unable to hear anything, due to the ringing in your ears that gave you a pounding headache. Changbin was in front of you, trying to get you out of it. “Baby! Hey! Breathe! Please breathe for me!” He tried.

His voice echoed in your head. You slowly opened your eyes. “I’m right here, Jagiya.” He said, holding your hands tightly. “Bin!” You sobbed. “Gh- hurts!” You still couldn’t seem to catch your breath. Still choking and coughing as the sobs escaped your throat.

Changbin nodded, rubbing gently over your knuckles with his thumbs. “I know, I know..” He mumbled. “Can you breathe with me? Like we practiced.” He said. You nodded quickly. “In.. One, two.. Out. One, two, three..” He said. You did as he said, following his breathing.

“Good.. You’re doing so good, baby.” He said. After a few more, you were semi calm. You hiccupped. “Do you wanna talk about it?” He asked. “Can.. Can I shower first?” You asked. He nodded. “I’ll sit in there, if you’d like.” He offered. You nodded.

He helped you up and you walked to the bathroom. You pulled off your jeans and socks. Changbin sat down on the toilet after setting the lid down. You slowly took off the hoodie, nothing but a bra under it. So there you stood, in your bra and underwear staring in the mirror.

Changbin squinted at you for a moment, watching how you stared at your stomach. He stood up and walked behind you, hugging your waist. “Binnie.. Do-Do you think im-” He was quick to cut you off. “No. No. No.” He said. He kissed your shoulders, kneeling down and turning you around.

He littered your stomach with kisses. “You’re so gorgeous, Jagiya.” He hushed against your skin. “Your stomach is so beautiful. All of you is beautiful.” He nibbled at your tummy a bit. You giggled softly, running your hands through his curly hair. “That tickles-” You hummed.

He looked up at you. “Mmm.. I wanna hear you say it,” He said. You frowned. “Say what?” You mumbled. “That youre beautiful.” He stood up and went back behind you, hugging your waist again. You blinked. You stared at yourself in the mirror, shaking your head.

“I can’t..” Your voice cracked. “Yes, you can, baby.” Changbin kissed your shoulder gently. “I-I..” You looked at Changbin in the mirror. He was giving gentle eyes to you. “I’m..” You started. He nodded gently. “I’m beautiful.” You finally said. Changbin gave a gentle smile. “So beautiful,” He said.

“Now get in the shower, yeah? I’ll go put your towel and pjs in the dryer so they're warm for you.” He said. He kissed your cheek and left the bathroom. You couldn’t describe how grateful you were for him.. You stripped out of your garments and got into the shower.

You spent a little while in the shower. Scrubbing a little harder than normal to get the disgusting words from your parents off your body. Changbin sat outside the shower, humming to a song he had stuck in his head as he scrolled through his phone.

Once you were done you turned off the water. “Bin, can you go get my clothes?” You asked softly, poking your head out from behind the curtain. He nodded and smiled at you before heading to get them out of the dryer.

You stood in the shower as you waited, thanking him when he returned. He left the bathroom so you could dry off and change. After you did so, you brushed your hair and teeth. You looked at the door, closing it a bit.

Even having heard Changbins words from before, you couldn’t forget the ones from your family. You leaned closer to the mirror and pinched your cheeks. You turned, tracing your jawline. You sniffled and gripped the sink. You groaned, leaving the bathroom quickly.

Changbin had made the bed nice and comfy for you to come back to. You smiled softly and sat down next to him, leaning into his chest. “You smell so nice,” He giggled as he ran his hands through your damp hair. You laughed softly, rolling your eyes playfully.

You took a deep breath. You promised you’d tell him after you shower.. So that's what you did. You began to tell him all of what happened. From how they bashed you the moment you walked in, to the moment you left.

When you had mentioned your finger, he gasped loudly. “Oh, Jagiya!” He frowned, taking your hand gently. He had seen the bandage before but he was too focused on calming you down. He brought your finger to his lips and placed a gentle kiss to it.

He had listened to all of what you had to say. Humming here and there to let you know he was listening. He would wipe your stray tears with his thumbs when they fell down your cheeks. Deep down he was pissed. Rightfully so. He hated how your parents treated you.

He had witnessed it first hand when they invited the both of you to dinner at a fancy restaurant. It was disgusting how they shit talked her like it was nothing. Then to turn around and praise their other child just as easily. He hated it.

He rubbed your back comfortingly. “I’m so sorry sweet Jagi.” He sighed softly. You shrugged. “It’s whatever.” You sighed. “I knew better when I decided to go.” You mumbled. “Still. You don’t deserve that,” He said. “Get some rest, yeah? I’ll treat you to a better dinner tomorrow?” He smiled.

You smiled softly, looking up at him. “Thank you. Bin. I appreciate you more than you know.”

You whispered. “Aishh.. No need to thank me.” He gave that nervous smile. You giggled and kissed him softly, which he happily returned.

You pulled away after a moment and hummed. You both crawled under the blanket and tangled your legs together. He reached behind him and turned off the lamp before wrapping his arms around you and pulling you close.

“I love you, Jagiya.” He whispered. “I love you more, Bin.” You hummed and closed your eyes, drifting off into a comfortable sleep. He would stay awake though.. Just for a few minutes. Taking you in. Admiring you from the dim streetlamp that shined through the window. He didn’t understand how anyone could be so rude and unkind to someone like you. So pretty and sweet.. He sighed softly and closed his eyes, kissing your head and falling asleep soon after.

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im so proud of this tbh :0 i literally thought of this as i was falling asleep and i wa so excited to write it, i love angst. i hope you guys enjoyedd! stay safe, loves! muwahhh!!

all writing rights are reserved to @his-angell do not repost or translate my work without my permission.

144 notes · View notes

ch4rm3r-skz · 1 year

Text

"The Devil Doesn't Bargain"

Genre: Angst to Fluff

Pronouns: N/A

Members: Hyunjin (Briefly) & Changbin

TRIGGER WARNINGS: Mentions Of Yelling, Mentions Of Cheating, Mentions Of Crying, Cheating from Y/n, Soft! Changbin, Cheater! Hyunjin, Speeding In A Car, Kissing.

Description: "The Devil Doesn't Bargain, He'll Only Break Your Heart Again."

Word Count: 2097

STORY BELOW THE LINE

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“Don’t you dare leave,” Hyunjin yells from the living room as you’re about to leave the house. You slowly close the door as you walk out, immediately running to the stairs to exit your apartment building. As soon as you reach the bottom of the stairs you’re met with your closest friend, Changbin. He takes one look at you and pulls you into a hug.

“What’d he do this time?” He asks as he rubs your back. You shake your head as you try to hide the fact that your tears were slipping from your eyes and then soaking into the thin material of his shirt. He felt it, of course, he did. He felt it every time this happened. Last time it had been sneaking around, before that it was lying, but he knew this time was much worse. You never asked him to meet you. You always came to him. This time, however, you couldn’t bring yourself to drive. You knew the second you got in the car you would burst into tears. He continues to rub your back as he shakes his head.

“It’s worse this time, isn’t it? Did he hit you? I swear to god if he hit you-”

“Changbin shut up! He didn’t hit me! I promise…” You croak out through tears, hoarse from the hours of screaming back and forth you and Hyunjin had just shared.

“Then what?” He whispers, pulling you as tight into his chest as he could without hurting you. He cared. He has always cared. He needed to know what happened. If Changbin had just been honest with you, you wouldn’t be in this situation, to begin with, and he knows that. He blames himself for every fight, every tear that falls from your beautiful eyes. Truthfully he knew it wasn’t his fault, but he’d blame himself regardless.

“I caught him…” You whisper, which leaves him puzzled for a second, but that second is gone just as quickly as it had come. He shakes his head and slowly makes you look at him.

“He cheated on you?” He asks, noticing how your lip was quivering and how tears spilled from your eyes the second you’re sure he’d realized. You pull away gently.

“It doesn’t matter, I promise. He’ll change. I can do it, I promise… he’ll be better one day. It’ll only hurt right now. Only for a little while.” You whisper, your words used to work. You used to be able to force yourself to think he’d be better for you. He promised he’d be better for you. You didn’t understand. You gave him every part of you, and he didn’t care. Your thoughts pushed you too hard, your legs beginning to shake with the rest of your body as you slowly lower yourself to sit down on the floor.

“I can see that you’re sure you can change him, but I know you won’t.” Changbin, hums sitting down next to you as he pulls you into his arms. You shake softly as you cry, chest heaving as your breathing begins to come harder than before.

“I can do it, I can do it… in a few months-”

“It’s been four years…” Changbin whispers. He remembers. He remembers you sobbing in his arms on every single forgotten anniversary, all four painful years.

“I can do it.” You whisper, tears slowly falling from your face.

“He’s gonna break your heart over and over and over, and you’re never gonna give him up, are you?!” He bursts loudly which makes you jump. He immediately pulls you closer. “I’m sorry… I don’t mean to meddle, I’m sorry… it’s just… I see it. He’s never going to change. He’s never going to be your Prince Charming. He’s going to keep hurting you over and over and over again. He’s never going to settle down for you. He throws you away like you’re trash. I told you, didn’t I? I know you don’t wanna let him go, but I swear-”

“Changbin, stop, please… for the love of God, please stop.” You whisper, crying softly. “I know… okay…? I know… but I love him… I need him to get better… I need things to change… I need him to change…”

“He’s never going to change, I know you think he will, but I think you’ll find that the devil doesn’t bargain. He’s only going to keep hurting you. I promise you it’s not worth it. He’s never going to give you what you need. He’s never going to change. Whether you put all of your efforts into it or not. You could give everything to him, but it won’t change him. I’ve seen him do this to more than 10 people. He’s not going to change for you, angel, regardless of what you do for him.” He says gently, using the sleeve of his shirt to wipe the tears from your eyes which only makes you cry harder.

“I don’t wanna be here anymore…” You whisper out, looking up at him. “Please…” You whisper, he instantly lifts you as he stands to his feet, carrying you to his truck, setting you gently into his passenger seat, and buckling your seatbelt for you before he closes the door. He walks to the other side of the truck, about to open the door when he notices Hyunjin out of the corner of his eye. He quickly hops up into the truck, slamming and locking the doors just as Hyunjin gets to your door.

“Y/n, I swear to God if you don’t get back upstairs-” Hyunjin is interrupted by the sound of the engine as the truck roars to life.

“Say the word and I’ll pull away…” Changbin whispers, looking you in the eyes to keep your attention away from Hyunjin.

“Please… I don’t wanna be here anymore.” You whisper. Immediately Changbin threw the truck into drive, speeding away from the apartment buildings.

“Where to?” He asks, looking over at you once he hits the highway. Immediately he notices that you must’ve cried yourself to sleep, as you’re passed out, holding tightly to his right hand. He gently tries to peel his hand away from you but you hum.

“Don’t… please..” He stops moving his hand and simply continues to drive.

An hour later Changbin is pulling into the driveway of his house, parking the truck. He slowly slips his hand out of yours and then makes his way over to your side of the truck. He opens your door gently, unbuckling your seatbelt. He proceeds to carry you into the house, walking you straight to his room as he lays you down momentarily, slipping your shoes off. He tucks you into his side of the bed, kissing your forehead softly before he begins to collect some things for his night on the couch.

“Binnie…?” You mumble out, having been woken up by the sound of his dresser drawer opening. You slowly sit up, eyes adjusting to the dark, the outline of Bin’s shirtless body being one of the only things you can see. He makes his way over to you, sitting at the edge of the bed.

“Yes, angel?” He asks quietly, gently resting his hand on your calf.

“Thank you…” You whisper and he immediately knows you’ve started crying again.

“Can I lay with you?” He asks to which you nod, reaching for him almost instantly. He wraps his arms around you as he lays down next to you, pulling you tight to his toned chest. You breathe in his scent, salty, like the beach, but warm, like vanilla.

“Binnie…?” You whisper again, tears coating his chest quickly.

“Hm?” He hums quietly, allowing his hand to loop gently into your hair as he begins to massage your scalp.

“I wanna be a hypocrite.” You mumble, looking at him slowly.

“What do you mean by that?” He whispers, noticing how close your face had gotten to his. Without another word, you catch his lips in yours. He doesn’t even hesitate in kissing you back, wrapping a strong arm around your waist to pull your body tight to his, his other hand slipping to cup your cheeks. He kisses so lovingly, hungrily almost. He kisses you with so much passion. You feel as though you could read his emotions completely when you kiss him. You pull away, his lips following yours momentarily before he pulls away as well.

“Hey, Y/n…?” He mumbles, looking you in your eyes.

“Hm…?” You whisper, allowing one of your hands to slide onto his broad chest, the other resting against his large bicep.

“Be a hypocrite more often…” He hums out, kissing you deeply once again, kissing you more deeply than before. The kiss is slow, and so comforting. You feel your body melt into his, your lips working in time with his, feeling so comfortable with him. You wrap your arms around his neck as you pull away, burying your head in his neck.

“Kiss me more… promise I don’t mind..” You whisper, hugging him tightly as you feel him snuggle gently into your neck as well.

“He’s not gonna change.” He whispers and you nod.

“I know he won’t… I keep hoping he will, but… Binnie, I’m so tired…” You whisper, tearing up once again. “Do you think he ever meant it when he said he loved me…?” You whisper out, sniffling softly. Changbin immediately knows he needs to take your mind away from Hyunjin. He can’t bear to see you cry anymore.

“Get up.” He says quickly, rising to his feet. “Let’s go.” He says, grabbing a hoodie and tossing it to you. “Put this on.” He says as he throws a long sleeve shirt on.

“Where are we going…?” You giggle, shaking your head. “We can’t just up and leave.”

“Yes the fuck we can, let’s go.” He hums, grabbing your hand and pulling you out to his truck, having somehow grabbed the keys off of his dresser in his rush for the door. He lifts you into the passenger seat, once again buckling your seatbelt for you and then shutting your door gently. He hurries to the driver's side and hops in, turning the truck on and flipping the car into drive, pulling out of the driveway quickly.

“Binnie! You’re speeding!” You squeal, holding tightly to his hand.

“Do you trust me?” He asks, looking at you for a moment.

“If I didn’t, I wouldn’t be here.” You whisper, giggling softly as he speeds the car up more.

“You remember where we met, yeah?” He asks. Of course, you did. It’s not every day people become best friends at the aquarium.

“Of course I do, why? Bin, they’re closed.” You laugh softly, looking over at him again.

“Do you trust me?” He asks again, pulling over to look you in the eyes.

“Always.” You mumble, unbuckling to kiss him deeply. “Always…” You mumble against his lips before pulling away.

He immediately drives to the aquarium, getting out of the truck to open the door for you. “After you~” He hums as you hop out of the truck.

“We can’t get in, they’re closed!” You hum again, kissing his cheek. He wraps his arm around your waist and leads you to the staff entrance.

“You sure?” He asks, pulling the door open. “I come here to relax all the time~” He hums, leading you inside. “Do you remember where we met?” He asks softly to which you nod excitedly.

“STINGRAYS!!” You squeal softly, pulling him to the stairs and then up to the stingray exhibit. “Woah…” You whisper, staring at them. “They’re so…”

“Beautiful..” Changbin whispers, looking over at you. “You know something…” He mumbles, squeezing your hand softly, looking you in the eyes.

“Binnie…” You mumble, slowly cupping his cheeks. “I know…” You whisper out. “You don’t have to say it, I already know… me too..” You mumble, kissing him deeply.

“Don’t let him hurt you again…” he whispers. “Just give me a chance, I promise you I won’t ever hurt you the way he does..” He says gently. “I promise you I’ll do everything I can to make you happy.”

“All you had to do was tell me how you felt…” You mumble, hugging him tightly. “I was just waiting for you…” You whisper, nuzzling your face into his chest.

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