Tumgik
#seeing his bestie in that black turtleneck
kooktrash · 8 months
Text
the art of obsession | kim taehyung
Tumblr media
summary: in a world of painters and poets, there were two college students looking for the right sort of inspiration. through devotion in your craft, you find yourself drawn to kim taehyung—a grad student painter who’s everything you’ve ever looked for in a character. his walk, his form of speech, his art, it all captivated you to the point where you wanted to recreate him in words and you begin to realize how similar the two of you really are. you share a sort of obsession in your work that seems like only each other could understand and he invites you into his world of oil paints and charcoals in hopes of drawing you on paper.
✎ genre/au: dark academia. college au. painter!taehyung x writer!y/n [afab. she/her]
✎ 17.4K words
“He’s more myself than I am. Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same.” — Wuthering Heights, Emily Brontë
warnings: smut. slight obsession with their work. prestigious college. tae literally takes oc to a graveyard. oc and tae dont take criticism well. unprotected intercourse. oral [f and m]. oc slobs on his knob and tae eats like it’s the last supper. missionary. side position. lowkey passionate sex. fireplace crackling. namjoon and oc used to be fwb. hints that oc and Jimin used to be fwb too. jungkook is tae’s sculpture artist bestie. jimin is oc’s ballerina bestie. namjoon is oc’s writer bestie.
Tumblr media
The smell of cigarettes was something you were fairly used to being around where you resided. You’re not sure what makes it so popular among young academics and sometimes you wonder if it’s not the need of nicotine but more so the aesthetic of it that they all seem to enjoy. It seemed to always linger in the air around campus where all the grad students would walk with their heads down and bags under their eyes as stress took over their entire being. You understand the stress but being an undergrad student yourself, you’re not sure you could understand the extent of it that they must feel. All you could really do is watch the way it slowly deteriorates their body every time they step into the library.
Maybe it’s the Literature major in you, but you never fail to try and assess each person that walks in as if you could see their entire character design and what makes them who they are. Today you got a bit lucky because despite how slow your homework had been going, your favorite case of study had just walked in wearing his usual black turtleneck tucked into a pair of loose corduroy pants. He wore a pair of rounded wire glasses that you love getting to see him in and they did wonders to conceal the eye bags you knew were there.
With this smallest hint of entertainment you’ve found through your long and boring study session with only one friend to confide in, you shut your copy of — excuse the pretentiousness — The Pictures of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde, and lowered the volume on your headphones enough to be more aware of the cause of his visit today. You rarely saw him in the library and if he did happen to come by it was to check out or check in a single book on Michaelangelo or Davinci.
You were surprised by how close he seemed to have gotten to you today. The table you studied at was only a couple feet away from a book aisle he had currently walked down and now he was just a meter or so away with his head down in his book. The usual smell of smoke surrounded him and despite scrunching your nose at the smell, you chose to ignore it and study him a little further. You even went as far as to lower your headphones until they curled around your neck giving him your attention even if he didn’t know he had it.
As much of an observer as you were, you never seemed to catch on to the way his gaze would shift to you any time you weren’t looking, eyes scanning your features rather quickly as he made his own assessment. You dressed warmly today, probably due to the fact that there’s been a light rain that has been casted over the city, always seeming to linger longer where the buildings were older and all signs of urban life seemed to dissipate. You were dressed in neutral tones today that placed you perfectly with your own surroundings and if this was a painting he’s sure you would be the focal point—or maybe the single spec of bright color you wore which was in this case your powder blue headphones. He’s not sure he’s ever used that specific shade of blue in a single one of his works before but maybe he’ll look into it.
He rarely visited the library but when he did it was always a pleasant surprise to see you there. He didn’t care much to get to know you, he just found the aesthetic of it all captivating. The library was beautiful, truthfully, with its dark wood shelves and polished tile floors that echoed with each step. It was eerily quiet and it always smelled of old books and always reminded him of a cathedral. There were large stained glass windows of poets, painters, dancers, etc. the clear glass windows overlooked the large pond that covered the back of the small campus where the woods began to take over and student life decreased aside from the occasional late night college party hosted there between trees and bonfires.
“He always comes into my work for paints. I wonder why he always pays in cash.” Your friend said, suddenly appearing next to you and not messing with the printer anymore. He must’ve caught sight of Taehyung before he left and considering he worked at a supply store, it was no surprise he recognized him.
“Maybe he hates banks,” you joked, turning to Jimin with a smile. Jimin pursed his lips staring down the aisle where Taehyung had disappeared once he had his book, “Maybe cash is more aesthetically pleasing. He’s an art major, isn’t he? I say he’s too pretentious to use a plastic card—or even worse, Tap to Pay.”
At that you laughed, deciding to continue the teasing of a man you barely knew while also trying to defend him, “Do people ever get tired of throwing words around?”
“Are you referring to my use of ‘pretentious’?” Jimin asked as he moved to the other side of the counter, “I used the term correctly, it’s an adjective meaning, ‘attempting to impress by affecting greater importance and culture than is actually possessed’. His refusal to adhere to society’s technological advances is pretentious in itself. I bet he still uses No. 2 pencils as an act of defiance against mechanical pencils—if he was a writer like you he would probably be more drawn to a pen but he’s an artist and artists make mistakes that get covered up or changed.”
You couldn’t help but smirk at that, “Tell me then, Jimin, what does a ballerina use to convey words? An Arabesque?”
Jimin released a loud groan, “I hate this goddamn school.”
You watched him open his newest generation laptop and hide behind it. He knew now how little room he had to talk. You, yourself, couldn’t utter a word to disagree with him either when in your hand was a Montblanc fountain pen that cost your parents a hefty 1,500$ to get to you when you were first accepted into the school. You’re sure when the time comes for you to finish undergrad, they’ll up the price and give you one worth 4,000$—the most profound amount of proof that you did in fact strictly use pens for everything.
You would never dare mention anything revolving around the money Taehyung’s family is rumored to have because you don’t know anything about him to do so.
All you knew were the few things you’ve noticed — a couple that even made it into your journal — like the fact that he specialized in two mediums; charcoal and oil paintings. He’s a known name at the University for his work and dedication and you saw that through one of his works. It was dark and a bit twisted but it told a story and you think that’s what drew you into him before you even knew it was him.
Despite his strong presence that always seemed to draw you in, he had a gift for making himself invisible in a group setting. He never spoke up in class, never caused a fuss, he was in and out like a shadow.
At the start of the semester you were taken by surprise when you found him sitting in one of the back rows of the lecture hall to an advanced anatomy class that you’re sure you took for very different reasons. Taehyung was interested in the study of the body so he could fully understand the way the it works from the inside out. He wanted to understand how each limb moved, how fluid each bone and muscle connected, how they could contort, see where the organs go, imagine the flesh coming to life when he painted.
In literature, anatomy isn’t referring to the human body. It refers to a separation of a topic into smaller parts for detailed analysis of the work. You did not make a mistake when you chose this lecture, you too wanted to study the body for your work. You wanted to learn how fragile it really was, how it could be destroyed, how hard it was to do so. You wanted to know about which bones were weaker, which organ puncture did the most damage. You need visuals and understanding of its healing process, of the way it moved, how the nervous system worked. Once you had a better understanding of the body, you just knew that you would be able to apply all these things to your writing. You would be able to detail how your character’s body deteriorated outside and in. How the body would slowly break down, which nerves were affected, how the heart worked in that moment. It would be gruesome but intriguing enough for your readers.
Maybe you needed to write something not so dark, something that didn’t make you take courses you didn’t really need but wanted in hopes that they’ll help you understand better. You didn’t actually need to go this far to describe a couple grueling scenes but it helped.
Tumblr media
The room was silent aside from the obnoxious sound of the clock, Tick… Tock… Tick… Tock…Ticking.
You stood at the front of your professor’s desk in his clustered office filled with classical literature books and awards for writing all over the shelves. His desk took up the majority of the space inside and whenever you were in here you couldn’t help but feel just a little suffocated. There were barely any words shared between the two of you, he only ever decided to truly grace you with his speech when he was critiquing and yet right now he’s been uncomfortably silent.
The silence had grown so long that you found your attention drifting toward the grandfather clock that was tucked away near the overwhelming stained glass window that overlooked the courtyard filled with wet and fallen leaves. The trees were bare and the fountain had a sculpture of a big swan with its wings spread in what looked like a dance. It always reminded you of the Swan Song, but you never knew if that was morbid of you. The idea of your University of Fine Arts decorating the campus in the black and white birds simply for decor always seemed strange to you too.
There was no way they would ever portray anything without meaning, or at least something not up for interpretation and yet every time you looked at one of the swans, you thought about the Swan Song, the way the bird’s wings were open beautifully with each detail chiseled into the stone. It looked like the swan’s final performance before its end. It wasn’t the sort of symbolism you liked to see at a school with such dedicated artists looking for a way to perfect every aspect of their work as if each one was their last.
“I like it,” your professor finally said, drawing your attention back to him in an instant, “Your writing has improved Y/n, I’m starting to really visualize the plot and I think it has a certain rawness to it that I’m not used to seeing from you.”
The corner of your lips turned upward like you wanted to smile but you wouldn’t fully allow yourself to. He hasn’t looked at you yet, his eyes stayed glued to your paper and it was clear he wasn’t done, “But it still feels stiff—well, the main character does. I can’t understand him yet, he’s just a mystery to me and not one I’m interested in unraveling. I can’t understand his depth and it’s becoming a big flaw in your writing. Everything else sounds wonderful, well articulated and with such emotion… that when I think of him all I see a huge lack of substance. He’s being drowned out by the rest and he’s supposed to be the one I follow when I read.”
You didn’t say anything as your jaw slowly clenched shut, eyes unwavering as he went on, “It’s like you have a lack of knowledge for human emotion and psychology, I’m not sure that’s something that can be easily fixed.”
“Does it make my writing bad?” You asked stiffly and he shook his head no.
“No, your writing is captivating but there’s a very huge disconnect I’m feeling from your characters,” he said, looking up at you, “It takes away the beauty of it.”
Your lips felt sewn shut as he handed you back your paper with all of his notes for you to fix and you felt like crying. You couldn’t even utter out a single word as you forced yourself not to react to his words and leave his office with your head held high.
What did he mean by disconnect? What more did he want you to do? What did you not understand about human emotion? You’re a human, what is there not to get? What else did he want from you?
These questions circled your head for what felt like an eternity, only confusing you more and more as you left for your next lecture. You spent the fifteen minute gap with your journal out jotting down every question that came to mind trying to see how you could find answers to these.
You sat alone in your row of seats waiting for other students to arrive and you took the time to brainstorm. He told you your characters lacked substance and implied that they were hard to visualize. He said that he can’t understand them, especially the lead and that he couldn’t be absorbed into a story about a character he doesn’t care for. He basically said that you lacked an understanding of emotional depth for the characters you write and therefore your stories will continue to have a disconnect until something changes. If only something could inspire you, maybe help you analyze these so-called emotions you couldn’t comprehend. You needed to remove some of the mystery around your character and really dive in on his arc, understand how he felt. How could you do that? It's not like you could fully visualize it yourself either unless you really began to study those around you more than you already do.
You sat up straighter in your seat and looked around as the lecture hall began to fill slowly. The room had a sort of ancient feel to it with long hazelnut rows of desks pressed side by side against each other in an amphitheater manner. There were diagrams and models of the human body plastered everywhere but none looked straight off of a doctor’s catalog. They looked like Davinci himself drew every skeleton in the room. It also had a small echo especially when the rain hit the wall or glass windows that sometimes tuned out the sound of talking students entering the hall.
You recognized most of the faces and the one who passed you as he went up a few rows seemed to distract you more than the others. Kim Taehyung didn’t wear glasses today but he wore a wool sweater and linen pants. There was a small splotch of gray paint on his knuckle that he hadn't seemed to notice as he swung his book bag onto the desk with a small thud, uncaring if anyone heard and ignored everyone around him.
He was similar to your character, almost. He always seemed closed off and unapproachable but behind his eyes was an aura of emotion that isn’t easily interpreted. You found yourself beginning to scribble down in your journal, just basic things you noted about him.
The lazy, bored look in his eyes that made him look tired and unamused by everything that happened around him.
Then there was his stance. He had good posture but when he sat down in his seat he leaned all the way back with his arms on the table like he was observing every person in the lecture hall, even you.
You knew this because for a second your eyes met with Taehyung’s and in that measly moment you just took in the sight of each other. Taehyung didn’t hold much expression in face but his fingers seemed to twirl his No. 2 pencil a little more intently now. He ran his gaze down from your eyes to the curve of your nose and curl of your lips. There was something about your facial features that he was delighted in studying. When you looked away and gave him a view of your side profile he leaned toward his desk more and the leather sketchbook that rested over his textbook was flipped open as he began to sketch you.
The drawing didn’t mean much to him, it was just a small doodle to pass time, his hands had to always be sketching and you happened to be his distraction today. Usually he doesn’t really pay attention to you when he’s in class, you sit far enough from each other that you never interact and when he catches you in the library you always seem lost in your own world.
He knows your name, he read your story last semester simply because it intrigued him. It was published on the school forum and won an achievement so he checked it out and it was good, your writing is intricate, or at least that’s what he thinks. He’s able to follow along to every word and not be bored or confused but with a certain degree of understanding that the reader needs to learn. There’s an aura of mystery around it, yet it was not something that he couldn’t comprehend and he thinks that’s why he was able to enjoy it.
At the end of the lecture he had three small drawings of you.
“Come on man, it won’t take long, just one drink,” Jungkook begged him for the third time in a row. Despite his friend’s darker exterior dressed in black jeans, a black tee, and a black leather jacket, he was way more outgoing. He was always trying to get Taehyung to go out for drinks or to party but he just doesn’t have the time.
“Not tonight,” Taehyung said as he opened up his pack of cigarettes and took one out, sliding it to his lips before burning the end with his lighter. He handed the pack to Jungkook who took it without question and did the same.
Jungkook released a sigh in disappointment, shaking his head a little as he said, “Whatever man, you say that every night.”
Taehyung shrugged his shoulders as he took a drag and pulled it out between his index finger and thumb, “Then get the hint.”
His friend wasn’t listening anymore, choosing instead to stare at the building in front of him, dimly lit from all the lamp posts. It was just after sunset and the only students around were probably working on assignments like Jungkook and Taehyung. Taehyung took advantage of the art room to work privately and in a bigger space while Jungkook worked in the warehouse where he could work on his new sculpture. Taehyung couldn’t understand why Jungkook cared about whatever was going on at the library till he casually looked over too.
“She looks familiar,” Jungkook said pointing to you as you walked down the sidewalk toward the bus stop. Taehyung looked too, you had a tote bag like most students around here and there was a butterfly clip in your hair but it still looked messy. Your hair was down earlier and at some point you decided to put it up and he realized now that he didn’t have a preference on how hair looks on someone. He likes the style you had earlier and the one you have now too because they enhance your features more.
“That’s Y/n,” Taehyung said casually as they went to the parking lot. Jungkook looked at him curiously before glancing back at you, “You know her?”
Taehyung didn’t have an answer for that so he didn’t give one, he just walked ahead wondering the same thing. “Let’s get a drink,” Taehyung finally gave in and Jungkook immediately cheered. “Yes! Okay, don’t worry, just one.”
Tumblr media
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder… that is what every artist has ever been taught. Taehyung has never been able to disagree with a statement more than that one. There is not beauty everywhere, it is not as inclusive as one might think and to truly understand art in the many forms it could take, one needs to understand the meaning of genuine beauty.
It’s quite terrifying in a sense, for one to be able to lose control and fall for the Dionysian seduction and view beauty for what it truly is. It is a raw and exhilarating topic that cannot be defined by just looks or words but more the freedom of life, life is beautiful in its own twisted way and to accept that definition is to be able to portray that in what you do. That’s why Taehyung’s art tends to lean toward a more dark and twisted form. When he creates art he’s not just looking at creating something nice to look at or something with a hidden meaning that no one would ever truly understand. When he creates, he wishes to express human emotion through his work—he wishes to make others feel things they’ve never felt before and that is the beauty he is chasing after.
Beauty is not a person but a feeling and when he looks at you he seems to understand that better.
It’s not just your outward attractiveness that draws him in. It’s the terrifying beauty that you radiate in your gaze, in your mannerisms, in your writing. It intrigues him and if he could put you on a canvas and unravel everything inside you — your fears, your joys, your tears — he would but till then you’re nothing but a familiar stranger that invades his mind when he least expects it.
“Taehyung, your work is beautiful,” his professor said, “Everything you create is effortlessly perfect but…”
He waited with a bated breath, already not liking where this was getting. He watched closely to the way she tilted her head in curiosity, “It’s rather dark, don’t you think? Maybe hard for interpretation an—“
“It’s not made to be interpreted by anything but the way it is,” Taehyung said boldly, “Once art is set for others to create a new meaning for it, is it ever truly art?”
“I guess I am not understanding what you mean,” she said leaning forward against her desk.
Taehyung released a sigh like this conversation with his senior was tedious, “When you look at Picasso’s work, do you think he created it for others to understand? Or was that something that people began to believe? He created art that was unconstraining to himself and his life.”
“Yes but look at Salvador Dali, the entire aspect of surrealism that he used was to unleash the power of imagination and creativity. You can’t just shut your art into a small box for the sake of aesthetic,” she said and that made him scoff, his lip curled in distaste, “And let’s look at Monet? He’s practically what started the entire idea of Impressionism.”
“What it meant to him, how he viewed it at that moment, that was all,” Taehyung said, which made the advisor release a sign, “Claude Monet once said, everyone pretends to understand his art, as if it were necessary to understand when it is only necessary to love.”
“I’m afraid this conversation will go back and forth if we continue,” she said with a huff, already irritated by the way things are going, “The exhibition is in three months, in a month I’ll connect with you on how everything is looking and give you the rundown as well is there anything else you need from me, Mr. Kim?”
Taehyung shook his head and without a goodbye he was getting up from his seat and storming out. Not even a second after the chestnut double doors shut, did he find himself reaching into the pocket of his jeans to get his pack out. The cigarette sat perfectly between his lips as he blocked one side with the hand so the wind didn’t blow his lighter out and he lit the tip, ignoring the ‘No Smoking’ sign just a couple feet away. He couldn’t help but mumble, “Stupid bitch,” under his breath once he finally left the building.
As he rounded the corner, something hit his chest and his free hand immediately the person steady in front of him.
Your hand was on his chest to keep from hitting him and as you looked up, your eyes widened just slightly. Taehyung didn’t say anything as he let you go, brushing against your side and moving around you to leave feeling your eyes on him. You watched him head the way you just came from and finally snapped out of it when you heard your friend call for you.
He turned to look for you seeing you already walking over to some tall and muscular guy. The guy gave you a dimpled smile as he followed after you, no longer in Taehyung’s peripheral.
“Maybe he has a point, Y/n,” Namjoon said as he walked with you to the bus stop, “If you’re struggling then maybe you should think about altering the character more.”
You shook your head in displeasure, “No, I’m not going to change him, I just need to be able to visualize his characteristics.”
Namjoon released a sigh as he pondered over what advice to give you, but came up blank, “I mean… maybe you just need some real inspiration from those around you. ”
The both of you went silent trying to find a solution and you looked up at him curiously. Namjoon would be an amazing reference for a character but he doesn’t fit the image you want him to. He was like light, he was kind hearted and charming and so unbelievably smart but that’s not how you envisioned the main character in your story. The kind of character you had in mind was supposed to act similar to… well, Taehyung. He’s supposed to be a bit mysterious, cold, not necessarily a likable character but someone they can’t help but be curious about.
“Namjoon,” you called his name and for a moment he grew hopeful to the idea that maybe you were thinking of studying him the way you do with others—even if he knew that would never happen. Instead, you came to a stop and looked up at him, “I forgot my laptop in the ffice, I’ve gotta go get it.”
His brows furrowed, looking down at your tote bag, “I’ll come wit—“
“No, you have to work, right?” You asked, already backing away from him, “I don’t want to make you late, I’ll just catch the next bus.”
Before he could argue, you were already taking off in a hurry back down the way the two of you came from. With a sigh he watched you leave wondering why he always seemed to be a couple steps behind you and never beside you. All he’s done since he met you was follow your lead in friendship and outside of it.
Even when the two of you had sex months ago it was always when you wanted and never when he did. If he even thought to ask, all you did was blow him off and then question him on if he’s seeing anyone at the moment. In the same second you would press your lips to his cheek and remind him how much you adored him even when you blew him off he always found the act of it a bit poetic.
He loved you, but it’s a love unreturned and if he wants to stay by you, it has to be with him at the back of your mind and never at the forefront.
With that understanding, he had no choice but to let you go back toward campus walking across fallen leaves and dead branches while he went to the bus alone.
Your legs had taken off before you could even decide where to go and in the end you found yourself heading back the way in which you met with Namjoon—and also the way you bumped into Taehyung. You were never much of the shy type even if it appeared that way, your friends always said you were the selective type—only choosing who to be outgoing with and even then it was rare and required a lot of work to get to you.
They had it easy, Jimin was a childhood friend and Namjoon was in the same writing department as you but that’s as far as your circle went. Well, no, there’s Yoongi too but he’s a pianist and these days he’s so busy with lessons and trips to the orchestra, you barely see him.
Like stated, you were selectively social and right now, you were choosing to find Taehyung so you could formally talk to him. It took you about ten minutes of mindlessly walking through the courtyard to locate him and when you did, you came to a halt. He was just a few feet away now, cigarette between his lips, crouched down against the wall of some historic looking building with castle-like elements and you know he saw you coming when he turned his head and looked right at you.
That was the push that had you walking toward him and saying, “Kim Taehyung?”
“Yes?” He asked, looking you up and down, eyes unable to help themselves as he looked up from your legs to your face. You wore a black fitted turtleneck underneath a brown sweater vest tucked into a black skirt. You wore long 70s style brown boots and mesh tights too. Your hair was pinned back with a hair clip and pins and your ears were lined with simple yet pretty earrings. When his gaze finally met yours, he couldn’t help but take in the sight of you once more.
“My name is—“
“I know your name,” he said with a small glint in his eye, “Obviously.”
You didn’t pull away from his intense stare and watched him bring the cigarette back to his lips, “I thought it would be more appropriate to introduce myself.”
“Mm,” he exhaled looking down at the cement below his feet, flicking the end of the cigarette to let ash fall, “So what could I do for you, Y/n?”
He looked up once more and you bit your lip in thought, “If you are free, I wanted to see if you’d like to get a coffee with me.”
“I don’t like coffee,” he said, finally putting the thing out and standing up, “And it’s almost sunset.”
You blinked in surprise as he stood in front of you now but you didn’t back away, “Then we’ll just have dinner.”
“Thanks,” Taehyung swung his bag over his shoulder, “But I’m kind of busy, I’ve got somewhere to get to.”
He was already walking away to hide his look of surprise. He didn’t expect the two of you to ever really talk and he didn’t really know what to do. He ended up rejecting before he could even truly think it over. He imagined you as just a fantasy — nothing he could ever explore but that he could dream about. He just wanted to look and think about you but never know anything beyond what was on the surface—like a painting.
“And you can’t have a plus one?” You asked in your final effort to get closer to him completely unaware of what he thought of you. You watched him come to a stop, and for a moment you tried to imagine him contemplating. Taehyung turned to face you, “I’m not going anywhere fun.”
You stayed quiet as he went on, “And some might find it scary.”
It seemed like he was trying to warn you as if to let you back out of your own proposal but he wasn’t saying no and that was hopeful. You tilted your chin higher, “As long as you don’t plan on murdering me, I’m sure I’ll be fine.”
That made the corners of his lips turn upward in an arrogant smirk, “Okay, Y/n, follow me.”
The walk wasn’t too far from the college but the college was already a bit on the outskirts of the city. All you saw were green, dying hills as autumn threatened to take over and it took you a second to understand where he was taking you until he was leading the way down a steep hill toward an empty and cold graveyard. It was a straight line of jagged tombstones and overgrown plant life entwined around them. There were clear dirt paths leading down row after row of old graves and a few Angel statues but nothing too bad, at least that’s what you’re telling yourself.
“I told you, you might be scared,” Taehyung said as he walked parallel to the graveyard toward a tree that stood tall along the sloping hill, “But this is the best view of twilight, if you want, I could walk you back to campus.”
“No, it’s fine,” you cleared your throat deciding to walk ahead of him so you could be the one sitting upright against the tree. Taehyung dropped his backpack a few feet away from you and began getting his things out.
You didn’t question him, only observed the way he carried on like you weren’t even there. It’s not like you minded, you didn’t have any real agenda to get him to spend time with you and frankly, you felt a bit relieved to see that he wasn’t trying to figure out what you wanted. It was unspoken the way the two of you seemed to think similarly and brought out your tools.
Taehyung didn’t say anything when he flipped his sketchbook open and found a charcoal he could use as he began to sketch without much thought into it. He even made himself comfortable by lying back, using the angle of the hill to help him not lay horizontally and he bent a knee up as a sort of flat surface he could rest his book on. There was a small breeze that carried through his linen shirt and brown trousers but he wasn’t much worried about himself.
He was more worried about you, who had asked to spend time with him but had no real plan to do so. He’ll admit, when he said no it was just on reflex from all the other times he’s out right rejected others before but he only thought it over because he’s been curious of you two. When you told him you would join him for a moment he debated saying no again because this was his favorite place to be to watch the sunset but it wasn’t all that normal. He even tried to warn you and offer to take you back when you saw the graveyard but you didn’t even seem to care when you sat down. Now that he’s looking at you up close, he can see the way your brows furrowed in concentration as you scribbled in your journal, already feeling inspiration.
It’s now that Taehyung is realizing why he’s been so curious. He finds you beautiful, he’s sure he’s mentioned that before, but he finds you beautiful in an unsettling way. Just looking at you seemed to send him into a wave of emotion like you’re exactly what he’s wished to create on canvas. Before he even knew what he was doing, his hands were working away to make another sketch, eyes on you as he worked.
“What are you writing in that little journal of yours?” He found himself asking after some time. The sketch was rough and yet it was so refined that there was no mistaking what it could be. It was a monochromatic sketch of you with your back against the tree, legs straight before you and your hair covering your face with the howl of the wind. Your hands looked delicate when you wrote and you looked so lost in your own work that managed to capture that same essence in his drawing.
When you first looked at him, your eyes went down to the pack of cigarettes he was now messing with and out of curiosity he raised it to you as if asking if you wanted one. Moving to sit forward, you took one and held it between your lips as he dug into his pocket for his zippo lighter, flipping it open and bringing it toward your face to light the cigarette. He watched curiously as you leaned back a little, took an inhale/exhale, and said, “I’ll tell you if you show me what you’ve been doing in that little sketchbook of yours.”
For some reason a small smile came to his face as he laid on his side using his elbow for support and reached over to hand you the sketchbook. You took it with a sense of excitement that quickly turned into disbelief as you looked at it. The back of your index finger hovered over it but never touched for fear that you would smudge it or worse—ash, and when you finally handed it back to him, wordlessly, his cold fingers brushing against sending a warm current down your arm.
At this exchange, Taehyung moved to sit up, not bothering to brush off any loose grass blades off his linen shirt and read over a short passage.
A certain coolness in his gaze that made him appear cruel.
A charming aura that seemed timeless, not modern but ancient like he was created from every classic literature known to man.
His gaze, his smile, his voice—all deep like red velvet.
The list went on, each short sentence followed by another in what one could assume was meant to describe him. He didn’t say anything either as he handed it back to you the same way you had done with his sketchbook. Neither of you were looking for critique or praise, more so acknowledgement of what the other had been doing and once you had it, it was enough.
Taehyung stared forward as the line of bright Orange finally vanished from the sky and a cool blue clouded it. The atmosphere shifted now as darkness began to swim across the sky and you both knew it was time to go. Nothing was said as you both stood up with your things and even less was brought up on your walk back to campus.
It wasn’t until you stood at the bus stop that Taehyung decided to ask, “Are you busy tomorrow?”
“No.”
He pulled out a piece of paper from the pocket in his trousers followed by a pen as he scribbled something down before handing it to you, “Meet me here at 8:00pm.”
You didn’t have to say anything for Taehyung to know you would show and he left without much of a goodbye.
Tumblr media
The place you arrived to at 8:00pm on the dot wasn’t exactly what you had in mind but it wasn’t much of a surprise either—it was a warm record bar. The one thing that did seem to surprise you was Taehyung’s choice in music where he preferred jazz over classical. The bar was dimly lit only by shaded, vintage lamps and the small yellow candles near all the booze. The walls were lined with vinyls and the deep mahogany trimming gave the record bar a sort of dark academic charm to it.
When you found Taehyung he was sitting at a small round table fit for two and he had a book in hand—The Picture of Dorian Gray. He wore his usual metal wiring rounded glasses and his dirty blonde hair seemed quite soft and full of life. The dark brown sweater he wore matched well with his tan slacks and you didn’t miss the way eyes would fall on him. It was this charming, educated college boy with a rich father sort of energy that radiates off him, but also the clear look of disinterest written all over his face and it made people curious.
You debated calling his name to let him know you were here but when he looked up in time to catch you walking his way, you were aware that he had been waiting for you and checking the door every couple seconds. Taehyung didn’t shy away from taking in the sight of you in an olive green maxi dress paired with a thin white cardigan tied together at the top of your breasts and below your collarbone. You wore black boot heels this time and when you sat down in front of him he couldn’t help but look at your face now.
“You’re late,” he said as he closed his book and set it to the side. You didn’t even bother to look at the Swiss watch on your wrist as you said, “It’s 8:00, like you said.”
“Yes but what I meant was 7:55 which should have translated to 7:45,” he said annoyingly arrogant as he slid a menu toward you, “As per the rules of a first date.”
His tone was serious as was his body language and yet you could see the hint of amusement in his attempt to hide a smile. You smiled softly, setting your bag down next to you, “I was unaware this was a first date.”
“So you assumed this was the second?” Taehyung had a teasing tone now, “I, personally, would not call an evening together at the cemetery a first date.”
“I do say, I’m a bit surprised to even know you consider this a date after we barely talked at all yesterday,” you said as a waitress came over with a customer service smile. Conversation floated between you two with ease.
“Are we ready to order?”
Taehyung looked at you but you weren’t all that hungry so he ordered a single slice of pastry for the two of you to share, “Yesterday was just to enjoy and accept the presence of one another, tonight is to communicate and learn.”
Taehyung never cared much for investing time into someone he was with, usually if he ever showed any interest in someone or was short lived. He’s not sure what would happen exactly but once the excitement of pining for someone romantically wore off… he just did not care anymore. There was too much to handle and he didn’t have time for any of it—not the clinginess, the crying, the whining. God, the whining got to him.
Why do you ignore me so much?
You’re always too busy painting to notice me?
Taehyung, I just want you to spend time with me.
It was the constant whining that he hated because they just did not get that he was completely devoted to his art and nothing else mattered as much as it did. Yes… maybe the small ounce of excitement he felt helped inspire him but… well he does not need whoever he slept with anymore.
The infatuation had worn off and he’s back to being alone again but now he’s a little too curious about you. Hence, why he asked you out first and in such a haste.
“Alright,” you said, “So then tell me something small, for instance, what time did you arrive? 7:45?”
“7:30 actually,” Taehyung said as he lifted his mug of hot tea to his lips, “I had business to take care of around campus and I didn’t want to make the trip back home.”
“Well if you asked for my number I would’ve arrived sooner.”
“It takes away the romantic aspect of waiting for the other to arrive without hearing from them—maybe I’ll write you a letter instead,” he teased. You just laughed softly and asked, “I didn’t peg you as much of a romantic. And what business?”
“Nothing too important.” Taehyung said vaguely and despite your curiosity you didn’t push him to answer. The corner of his lips raised as he looked at you, looked at him and found himself saying, “But as for being a romantic? It depends on who you ask.”
You focused on what he said about that instead of what his business was and that made him happy. What he did was not that important but it was necessary after what had happened with his advisor. He still couldn’t wrap his mind around what she had told him and in the end he made and impulsive decision to gift her something that might make her see things from his point of view. Of course it was slightly biased but he believed his piece really explained his views on beauty enough for her to understand.
Taehyung delivered two paintings to her inbox earlier. The first one was a more finished painting of you, still slightly distorted and a bit dark but there was no hiding the romantic element that radiated off of it. He called it ‘Genuine Beauty’. The second painting was a distorted and bright picture of his professor with exaggerated features that weren’t pleasing to the eye and he called it, ‘Beauty in the Eye of the Beholder’.
A true sentient on what he thought of her words. He wanted to know how she would twist the grotesque image of herself into something beautiful.
“What have you been up to aside from writing me?” Taehyung asked, looking at you with interest.
“Aside from that, I’m afraid not much else,” you confessed, “I’ve been in a sort of dry spell trying to understand my character.”
“Tell me about them.”
“Well, it’s a him and he’s similar to you.”
He listened closely to each word you said, taking in the curve of your mouth when you talked and the way you gestured with your hands. He’ll admit, the character did seem very similar to him so he can understand your curiosity in him and the fact that you seemed to lose yourself in your craft didn’t go unnoticed by him. He simply nodded his head and replied with short answers when asked.
In the end, he offered the only thing he could, “Let me be your case of study then, and in return you’ll be mine.”
You smiled this time, a small arrogant smile as you said, “Will you paint me like one of your French girls?”
He understood the reference and found himself saying, “If you write me like one of the lovers in your poems.”
By the end of the night you found yourself in the back of a taxi driving straight to his place under the pretense of another drink. Conversation seemed to flow with ease between you and it ranged from Davinci to Monet, Shakespeare to Milton and whatever was in between. Even when Taehyung asked such a heavy question, you didn’t seem to struggle to find an answer.
“Do you believe in love?” He had asked as the cab stopped in front of a house similar to an upstate New York townhome. He had you by the hand helping you out of the car and held onto you as he led you up the stone path.
“I have to, I’m a writer,” you told him and he seemed to pull you into him more.
“But what is it that you believe it to be?”
The question did make you think a little bit. It’s not that you thought Taehyung had an ulterior motive in asking you such a thing; it’s not like the two of you were seriously into the idea of it but you wanted to give him the right answer—one that truly described you and your ideals.
You didn’t answer his question right away as he let you into his home which was no different than what you imagined it to be. His apartment was in an old building turned into luxury Victorian styled apartments with modern eclectic touches. It was a put-together mess of sketches and canvases littered around the place. The floor was made of a dark, polished hardwood and his furniture all seemed worn through with velvet cushions and engraved wooden trimmings. He had floor-to-ceiling bay windows with twine hanging across them and papers clipped on with laundry pins to dry. There was a warm feel to the place and it had everything to do with his dedication to earthy tones and shades of Morocco red.
There were painting supplies everywhere from scattered charcoals and cans of linseed oil for his paints. There were stacks of literature books and various art ones piled high on nearly every surface and yet it all seemed to be organized to what you could assume only he could understand. Taehyung didn’t even seem to mind the clutter as he chose instead to ask, “Red or White?”
“Red.” You responded quite simply before resuming your studying of his place, the fireplace on one wall was surrounded by canvases and books—same as the vintage bookshelf and for a moment you wondered if his bedroom looked any similar. The thought vanished quickly when you got the smallest hint of which room that might be from the open door down the hall. He had plain gray sheets on an unmade bed and the furniture in there was scarce, like he barely spent any time there and if he did it wasn’t to sleep—the bags under his eyes told you so.
“Have you thought of an answer to my question yet?” Taehyung asked, reminding you yet again of what he asked earlier. He handed you a wine glass and you took it with a nod in gratitude as he left you to find a record to play.
“I’ve had an answer all along, I just wasn’t sure how you would feel about it,” you said and you could see him smile as he moved the needle over the start of the vinyl, Nocturnes, Op 9 began to play.
“I’m not looking for anything in particular, just an insight on what you think,” he said honestly and with a small sigh you decided to tell him.
“I think love is more so… a choice than an emotion?” You finally said as you watched him take a seat on the floor near his coffee table instead of the velvet couch behind him. He motioned for you to join him, “How so?”
“Anyone can feel love at any given moment but it is fleeting,” you sat down, knees nearly touching his, “Tell me, have you ever felt in love before?”
Your question seemed to catch him off guard yet he answered as bluntly as he would regarding anything else, “Only with my paintings.”
“And that had been a choice, to continue, right?” You asked, “Love like every emotion is temporary and inconsistent. Yes, doing certain things or being with certain people might invoke these feelings but once that has dwindled it is your choice to remain in that constant state of loving something—or someone. I love writing, I always have because it is my choice. I choose to subject myself to the hardships that come with my work even at times where I think I hate it. Even at times when I choose to give up I think about the joy it brings me, the emotions that pour out of me and onto every letter and word I put down on paper. I choose to love writing, I choose to devote myself to it and I choose to put it above anything else in the world, even my own relationships.”
Taehyung could see it in your eyes how strongly you felt about it. Your answer had gone slightly off topic but he understood your reference to it in every word you spew, “So when I say I believe in love… I don’t mean it in regards to a feeling that transpires throughout inconsistently, but I mean it as a choice to continue to feel that way even when it hurts and I can’t take it any more.”
A silence seemed to drag on between you and for a moment you wondered if you said too much and sounded too stupid. Taehyung seemed to inhale and exhale at once, “Well, I do say, we have very similar ideals. I don’t think I could’ve put it into better words than a writer even if I tried.”
You couldn’t help but smile, hiding it behind your wine glass, “Maybe you’ll paint them instead.”
“Maybe, I’ll paint you instead,” Taehyung said with a pale yet serene expression like he was scared to speak his words and exhilarated by them all the same.
How could someone seem to get lost and sound so dazed when talking about writing? Did writing mean as much to you as his art did to him? Is that why there was never a need for many words to be spoken between you? Was that why he was able to enjoy your presence so long and so quickly when before you would never even speak? Was there always this underlying connection between your minds and how you viewed art and your world?
You rested your glass on the table as you took in his living room again and all its character, there was a set of paintbrushes just laying on his table and you reached for one. The wood was smooth between your fingertips as you twisted it before looking up at him with a curious gaze, “With one of these?”
Taehyung simply nodded his head watching you lift your skirt up just enough to expose a bit of leg and you brushed the art tool against your calf, “It’s soft.”
His tongue ran over his lips and he leaned forward to gently take the brush back. You were nearing an apology for taking it without asking him first but he simply scooted closer to you on the blanket he laid beneath you and placed your legs over his, skirt of your dress rising even further until he was running the brush over the curve of your knee, “I use it to blend shadows, like this.”
The brush felt soft against your skin, sending tingles down your spine as he ran it over you in circular motions, eyes on yours.
“I tried painting once,” you said as his finger slowly traded with the brush until he was softly touching you, “I wasn’t that good, I couldn’t portray the right picture.”
Taehyung just smiled as he felt you hand go over his while taking the brush back until you were tracing the curve of his wrist, “Paint with your words, and show me you’d write me, like your character.”
“He is very similar to you,” you said, “In almost every aspect and I didn’t realize that until today.”
“Mm,” Taehyung hummed in content when you lifted the brush toward the collar of his unbuttoned shirt, teasing him without realizing it. You seemed to use the brush against him without much thought of what you were doing and how it affected him. You should know, though, that the feel of his art tool against his skin would feel good to him. The soft bristles tickled his collarbone, “How would he make love?”
That seemed to catch you by surprise as you slowed your touch to look up at him. He just bit his lip, hand on your leg caressing it as he waited for your response. Without missing a beat, you said, “Slowly, starting with a sweet kiss.”
A small smirk came to his face, one that only he could pull off without looking cocky. He looked smart and pretty with his glasses and blonde hair, when he spoke he made it sound poetic and when he looked at you it felt like he was focused on whatever was beneath the surface. You watched him push his glasses up the slope of his nose and before you knew it, he was leaning closer, lithe fingers coming up to touch your chin and tilt your jaw.
Although you knew what was coming, there was no denying the small second of hesitation that coursed through you when his lips so tenderly pressed against yours, his voice low as he asked, “Like this?”
You licked your lips despite the extremely small space between yours and his and without the ounce of hesitation from earlier, your hand came up to his neck where you pulled him into you for a real kiss. It started off slowly just like the two of you knew it would but there was no denying the desire that laced throughout it. At first all that happened was your mouths moving against each other, getting used to the idea of kissing — something neither of you have done in a while. Then, it became more feverish. If possible, you seemed to move closer with your hand on his thigh to support yourself. You were on your knees leaning into him and he had a single hand against the floor to support his sitting position while the other was cupping your chin for the best angle. There was a growing intensity between your mouths, lips moving more forcefully now, saliva gradually increasing when you felt his tongue make a swiping motion against your lips.
“Or like this?” His voice had become more hoarse with need. He enjoyed feeling the way your body seemed to lean toward his and he seemed to ask, “What would he do next?”
“It’s not what he would do next,” you said as you moved without your own violation and trailed your lips along the curve of his jaw, “But what would happen to him next.”
Taehyung’s head seemed to tip back as he used both of his hands to keep him upright while you moved between his patted legs to kiss down his neck. He licked at his lips, slowly blinking at the first feel of your tongue licking his ear lobe before you sucked it into your mouth making a tingle run down his spine. Your warm breath tickling his ear made his breath bitch and it didn’t take you long to realize that you had found his weak spot. Unable to help yourself you brought your mouth back to his for a kiss that was much needier than any of the ones prior.
“Y/n,” Taehyung’s throat was dry and it made his voice raspier than usual, “Touch me more.”
The words surprised you. You didn’t take him for much of a womanizer but you didn’t think he would seem this touch starved. The last person you had slept with had been your dear friend, Namjoon, and when you realized feelings were beg bring to get involved you were to end the rendezvous that had transpired between you two in an effort to save the friendship and his feelings. You couldn’t explain why you could never see him as more than a friend—and you couldn’t explain why it was so easy to view Taehyung as something more. Your mind had been drawn to him before your body and yet it all felt the same.
You began to crawl away from him and in an effort to keep this going, he went after you with another kiss before your hand touched his chest to keep him in place. It got to the point where Taehyung wasn’t sure if it was the cashmere brown sweater he wore that made his body heat up, or if it was being too close to the fireplace but he felt himself begin to break into a sweat.
He stretched his legs out before him when he got the hint of what you wanted to do watching you shimmy down until you were nearly eye level with his pants and the evident bulge becoming more prominent with each passing second. Taehyung was not ashamed of how quickly you seemed to get to him and his body’s reaction to you. Sex was a normal thing, it was poetic and passionate if done with the right person and he hasn’t done it in a while—a long while. It was completely normal for him to release a light gasp when your hand grazed his inner thigh just inching toward his growing erection.
The two of you made eye contact once more, his lip caught between his teeth and his eyelids low in a lustful gaze that matched your own. There was a strong attraction toward each other — infatuation if you will — and you can’t say there’s romantic feelings between you but there’s no denying that there has been the underlying sexual tension that rose from a clear understanding of each other’s devotion to your work. It turns you on to know he seems to connect with your ideals.
You didn’t even realize Taehyung had moved a hand behind you until he was pulling on the back of your head to drag you back into a needy kiss. Your hands had already gone toward his slacks and you had been unzipping the front as the two of you made out once more. Taehyung’s hand fell back to the ground with a groan as you yanked at his underwear making him lift his hips enough for them to come down with his pants. A small hissing sound left his lips as his hard dick finally made its appearance, springing free of its right confines, hard enough to already angle toward his navel.
Taehyung was not ashamed by the way his stomach caved in with a deep breath at the first feel of your hand wrapping around his tip spreading the beads of precum that had already dribbled out the slit. His tongue was in your mouth, sliding against yours with you swallowing each groan he let out when you began to stroke his length slowly from base to tip. Like earlier, when you tried pulling away from the kiss to catch your breath, he was following after you to stop you from breaking apart from him.
A thin line of drool connected your mouth to his as you finally pulled back, biting down on your lip. He watched you look down at his exposed member, leaning down until you were face to face with it. His long fingers curled around your hair, slowly pushing your head down just a middle until he felt the first tender lick of your tongue along his tip. Taehyung’s entire body reacted to the way you tentatively licked his head teasingly making a small shudder travel right through him.
You have to say, Taehyung has one of the prettiest dicks you’ve ever seen and you just couldn’t help but want to savor it. It was just so pretty and you found yourself wanting to play with it some more. Your hand held onto him at his base as you ran your tongue down the side of his length lathering it in drool to aid your closed fist.
His brows scrunched together as he attempted to watch what you were doing. He could feel your hand jerking him off as you teasingly kissed up his side and tip, tongue swirling around his slit that leaked precum. He just couldn’t see you over the bulk of his sweater.
With an annoyed huffed, he released your hair to pull at his sweater with one arm as he brought it up toward his chest and tucked it under his jaw. Just as he had it fixed, a low and deep sound vibrating in his chest feeling your lips finally surround his tip, sucking gently before relaxing and taking more of him inside. You made yourself relax so you could loosen your jaw enough to accommodate his length as you began to suck him off, tongue licking along the bottom side everytime you bobbed your head up and down.
You had a firm hand on his upper thigh as the other was at his base against his pelvic bone to hold his hips down and let your mouth do all the work. His sweater slipped from under his chin making him groan as he threw his head back, “So good.”
He kept his gaze on the ceiling taking in the feel of your warm and tight mouth taking his cock so deeply. You looked up at his stomach trying to see his face but with the way his head was tilted back, you just couldn’t. All you could see was his chest rise and lower with each breathy sigh he let out, ducking his cock deeper down your throat.
Unable to help yourself, you moved your hand to his navel, feeling his breathing better and he needed to see what you looked like with his dick in your mouth.
He held the end of his sweater between his teeth as he stared down the expanse of his torso to where you laid between his legs swallowing around his cock with a dark look in your eyes that had him muffling a moan.
His hips bucked helplessly into you making you swallow more and more of his length till you couldn’t breathe properly anymore and needed to get off. The hand you still had on his dick began to stroke him, wrist flicking on each upward stroke to make your palm run along his slit while you caught your breath. You watched him in complete awe, he was so hard and his balls tightened against that you couldn’t help but lick between them.
"Fuck," the sweater made it hard to hear him as hw sank his teeth into it feeling it begin to moisten annoyingly so bur he was not going to miss the sight of you kissing below his cock to his balls.
When you finally decided to take him back in your mouth there was no slow build up, it was quick and sudden as you took him down your throat to the point where you gagged around him. The way he bit into the sweater looked like a restraint and he looked so pretty with the fire reflecting off his tan, bare chest and his blonde hair was just a knotted mess from how often he shook it.
“Y/n, you feel so good,” You were never much of a talker during sex, especially if it wasn’t genuine and just superficial dirty talk but he sounded so good moaning your name even if you couldn’t hear him properly.
There wasn’t much warning aside from the incessant moaning that fell from his lips and was swallowed in cashmere for you to know he was close. His hips bucked messily into your mouth, cock twitching with the need to just let go and when you met your mouth with your fist jerking off the rest of him… he just couldn’t take anymore.
Taehyung’s head fell back with a dry moan as the urge to cum got the best of him and he let go in your mouth. You didn’t seem to mind either, once the surprise of the suddenness had worn off, you didn’t hesitate but to try and swallow as much of the thick semen as you could, not at all bothered by the taste of it. Taehyung had to let his sweater go to breathe heavily through his parted lips as he used his elbows to sit himself up in the blanket, trying to understand what had just happened.
“Mm,” you hummed, proud of yourself for making him cum down your throat and you sat up to look at him. Taehyung met your eyes with his feeling heavy with need as he licked his dry lips before forcing himself to sit up properly so he could drag you into a deep kiss. You released a light mewl in surprise, kissing him back eagerly with his hand below your ear on your neck guiding you to angle your head one way while he went the other.
There was not a single part of him that felt bothered at the taste of himself on your tongue, if anything it only made him want you more so he could repay you for treating him so well. Once you had gotten lost in your little makeout, it was easy for you to follow his lead as he moved over you to get you to lie down in his place. The only time he pulled away from you was to finally free himself from the confines of his stupid sweaters and kick off his pants the rest of the way. It didn’t take you long to get what he wanted and you hurried to remove your cardigan feeling the straps of your dress begin to slip off your shoulders. Taehyung dragged you to him, kissing along the exposed skin of your collarbone and shoulder, hands sliding down your back till they could inch the dress down and off of you, making you take it off through the bottom so he wouldn’t have to pull away again.
Your bra and underwear were made of a thin crème colored lace that looked pretty against your complexion and soft between his fingertips as he ran his hands over your covered breasts that had been taunting him all night.
A quiet gasp left your lips due to the way his lips kissed down the valley of your breaths, soft hair tickling your neck. Taehyung’s hands held onto your sides, sliding them up to the end of your bra, feeling you arch your back into his affections until he was able to move them under your to grab at the clasp. Once he was able to unhook it, he tugged it off your arms letting you throw it to the side and dragged him into another kiss when he cupped your bare tits in his warm hands, using his thumbs to rub over your hardening nipples.
“Taehyung,” you whined softly against him, eyes on the ceiling when he began to leave love bites along your neck, traveling his wet mouth lower and lower down your stomach.
“Hm,” he hummed in acknowledgement, making his way between your legs while his hands groped your chest loving the softness of your skin under his rough painter’s hands.
As Taehyung slipped further between your legs till his face was near your spread legs, he looked down. The lace underwear was transparent enough for him to see just a bit underneath and he could see a small shadow of slick over where your cunt should be. He tried to look up at you through his blonde fringe and you sat forward enough to brush it back, smiling as he pressed a teasing kiss against the hood of your clit over your underwear. You lied back down letting yourself relax feeling his fingers hook under the hem of your panties till he was tugging it off and move your thighs over his shoulders so he four fit snugly against you.
Taehyung didn’t waste time teasing you, he had already been so turned on that not even cumming down your throat was able to calm his raging hormones. He just wanted to have you as soon as he could, any way he could, and that meant with his tongue stiffening as he parted your folds around him before licking flatly toward your clit. A light moan left your lips as your clit immediately reacted to stimulation, a small gush of slick pushing out of your pussy with arousal. Taehyung was not inexperienced in the art of making someone cum undone on his to hue and that was becoming more and more evident with the way he made out with your cunt like it was your mouth.
“Oh my god,” you threw your head back, out of breath, as his tongue began to flick messily at your clit while hands slid further down your inner thighs until he was using his thumbs to pull your folds apart for him. You could feel your wetness begin to drip further down but he was quick to leave your clit and lap his tongue against your wet entrance where your arousal seemed to form a puddle at. With the way his thumbs kept you open, you felt everything.
Every now and then his thumb would teasingly push in just a little more than before, acting like he didn’t even notice he was doing it while he hungrily sucked on your clit, tugging it between his lips. His thumb was rubbing against your labia, pressing into it, teasing your entrance every now and then by pushing into it until he felt your legs begin to tremble around him. Unable to help himself, he got a big more rough, tonguing your clit with such effort that his head shook with eagerness, swallowing your slick and pressing his face into your cunt to taste all that you had to offer.
“Oh,” you breathed out shakily, hand sinking into his hair when he nosed at your clit, tongue joining his finger as he thrusted it into you, “I-I, oh god.”
“Mhm,” Taehyung nodded, urging you to let go of him and you had to bite your lip to keep from moaning. Your thighs tried shutting but his head didn’t let you and instead you pressed them against him making him groan with need, eyes nearly rolling as he doubled his efforts.
Your throat became dry as you planted heavily, hips bucking against his mouth until finally you felt the knot in your stomach come undone. His motions did not miss a beat in licking everything you had to offer as your orgasm came in a wave.
“S-so, good,” you breathed out tiredly feeling your pussy walls clenching around nothing and as much as you wanted to just be done, you needed him inside you. When he came up to kiss you, you wrapped your legs around his waist, pulling him flush against you so his hard cock rutted against your wet pussy. The taste of each other on your tongues was what made it easy for you two to want to keep going without the thought of repercussions. His hand slid between your sweaty bodies to hold his cock, lining it up with your entrance, bumping into your clue as he refused to break away from the kiss.
You wrapped your arms around his neck, holding him close as the two of you looked at each other with such need, such want that your lips didn’t spend too long apart from each other.
Your tongue met his just as his cock met the inside of your pussy, taking it slowly as he stroked himself with your slick to ease himself in better. His dick was rock hard, and your pussy was so fucking wet he couldn’t help but moan into your mouth as you took him in.
Taehyung has to hold onto you with a hand on your waist to keep you from sliding away from him too much as the blanket wrinkles on his wooden floor. He had his other tucked by the side of your head looking down at you lovingly as he finally began to thrust, “Tell me if it’s too much, love.”
“Mhm,” you said softly, legs falling apart even more to accommodate his as he dug his knees into the floor so he use his hips to fuck you better. A groan left his lips at the expert roll of your pelvis against his taking more and more of his length inside your tight walls.
“You make me feel so full,” you moaned gently into his ear as he dropped his head down against your neck to try and ignore the fact that your pussy around his dick without any protective layer between them felt so fucking good. You were already so close and he’s barely started. He fucked you slowly but firmly, getting himself used to being inside you and sucking on your neck, his hand left your hip to cup your breast once more and you gasped when he pinched your nipple.
“So tight,” Taehyung breathed out heavily with a single touch thrust that had your walls tightening around him, “So good for me.”
He did it again, and once again drew another moan out of you, repeating his thrusts more roughly than before until you were moaning out a string of his name.
Taehyung was well endowed and you never doubted that for even a second. He knew how to have sex, not just to fuck, but to have sex. It wasn’t just loud groans and rough thrusts. He was sensual, he kissed your neck, whispered sweet words of praise in your ear, touch your body as he fucked you almost passionately—unlike the usual guys you hook up with.
“It’s like you were made for me,” Taehyung groaned, brows scrunched together in concentration as he pulled back to sit and swing your right leg over him to press against your left until you were nearly lying on your side. He laid down next to you, curving his body against yours and lifting your leg back and held it up with his knee as he fucked you from the side. His lips were against your ear, whispering, “Just for me, like my own creation.”
“Mhm,” you hummed, “Just for you, please Taehyung, I’m so close.”
You looked straight out of a vintage erotica film. His apartment was warm due to the fireplace and comforting because of the classical music playing. The moon looked over you as you had sex, nearly love making, lying on your sides with his body cuddled into yours, fucking you with his cock while groping your breasts in his hands. You had to angle your head back and then your neck to kiss him and he swallowed your mouth with his, thrusts getting tougher as he curled around you, “Me too, love, all for you.”
“So paint me,” you moaned, fucking back against him.
For a moment he wondered if you meant on a canvas, or with his cock in your pussy, but he realized he would gladly do both if you let him. Your hand slid back to guide his hips into yours, “Cum, Taehyung, inside me, please.”
“Oh god,” a low growl left his lips as he dug his face into your hair, “Fuck, Y/n, d-don’t tempt me.”
“Do it,” your hand came up to his hair now, dragging his head toward yours until your lips met in a messy kiss, “I’m going to cum, Tae, please.”
It wasn’t a good idea. You were on the pill but he didn’t know that, all he knew was that he wasn’t wearing a condom and he wanted to fill you with so much cum that he painted you white.
“Mhm,” he moaned when you tugged on his bottom lip between your teeth and his hand pinched your hips, “Cum, Y/n, please—oh fuck.”
The only thing that came from you two was the sound of skin slapping as the urge to cum overtook you both and you were fucking like rabbits in heat. Nothing but animalistic grunts left him as he finally felt the flood of release you let go around with him with a whine of his name and before he knew it, he was cumming.
You immediately felt full with his release as it joined yours, cock pulsing inside you as he waited a moment to reel his emotions back in, sweaty forehead pressed against yours, “So good.” He hugged you closely, breathing heavily into your neck, softly kissing your skin affectionately.
It took you both some time to regain awareness of what had just happened and you lied on the fur blanket he had tossed on the floor. The fire sizzled behind you and some classical song [you were ashamed to admit you didn’t know] was playing. Taehyung seemed to be more in control of himself now and reached up to his small table in search of his pack. Once he had a cigarette between his lips, he lay back down next to you to catch his breath, pressing it to yours next.
Tumblr media
There was a sort of glow to your skin, your eyes shined with the night sky reflecting through the windows. Light came from the fire not far behind and a small dim lamp in the corner yet the moon was still casted over you two.
His eyes traced your features once more and before he knew it, he was saying something unexpected, “She was the most beautiful person he had ever seen.”
Despite the way your heart seemed to stop, your brows furrowed, “What?”
Taehyung took another drag of his cigarette, “Who wrote that? ‘She was the most beautiful person he had ever seen’ I read it somewhere… ‘With stars in her eyes’.”
Your eyes seemed to widen as you thought it over for a second. A sense of realization flooded you but even knowing you might be right, you still shyly asked, “Virgina Woolf?”
“Yes, I believe so, ‘She was the most beautiful person he had ever seen, with stars in her eyes and veils in her hair.’ I read it years ago,” Taehyung stared out at the moon through the bay windows, “Anyways, it just came to mind, and reminded me of you.”
There was a cloud of smoke drifting into nothing like they were his words being absorbed all around you. After that a silence seemed to fill the room and it was so calming in fact that you found yourself lulled to sleep against his chest.
It wasn’t until hours later when you had woken to loud noises, did you realize that he had not had the luxury of peaceful post-sex sleep.
The first thing you had noticed in your haze of sleep was the sky still blue out and the fire still crackling behind you. The second was that you still slept on the floor and Taehyung was not beside you anymore. It took you some time to realize all the noise that had woken you up was coming from him and his quick brush strokes.
Taehyung had a pair of jeans on and a smock. He didn’t even bother with a shirt, just slipped the smock over his bare chest and he sat on the floor with a pallet full of paint in his hands as he did soft strokes on his canvas. He was so focused that he didn’t seem to mind his glasses which had slipped down to the tip of his nose, lips slightly parted in concentration and eyes bouncing around his painting.
You wondered what this meant for you. You didn’t know what time it was but the way he worked so diligently didn’t even make you want to stay, what if it would bother him? You don’t want to do that and he seems to have already forgotten you were there and what you had just done. With a small sigh you looked around for all of your things, finishing getting dressed and in search of your shoes and bag.
Taehyung’s strokes were fast and agile, he didn’t even have to think of how he was painting, he was just moving mindlessly and mixing all the right colors and blending in all the right places. You took a seat on the sofa trying to put your boots back on.
“What are you doing?” Taehyung asked but his eyes never left the canvas. You could barely hear him over the sound of the record player still playing and it took you a second to know he was even talking to you.
You looked up curiously, “Um… it’s late, I should probably go, I don’t want to disturb your work.”
You were very understanding actually. There are many times you’ve woken up in the middle of the night to write and you didn’t waste time on thinking of anything else while doing it so if Taehyung was the same about his painting then you didn’t want to bother him.
Taehyung pushed his glasses up with the tip of his brush as he finally looked at you, “You won’t disturb me. Stay.”
He watched as you brought your lower lip between your teeth in thought before saying, “Seriously Tae, I don’t mind leaving. You’re working, I understand.”
“But I mind,” Taehyung said in his deep voice that sounded even deeper this late with the fire in the fireplace still crackling and Beethoven’s String Quartet No. 14 playing in the background. You didn’t say anything for a moment and he ran a hand through his messy hair, a small paint streak coating a strand, “Won’t you stay, Y/n? I’ve been in a slump and right now it just hit me all at once and I think it’s because of you. Please, won’t you stay?”
“Can I watch?”
Taehyung did not hesitate to nod his head and motion for you to sit on the floor next to him so you moved quickly to do so.
By the end of the night you watched him paint until dawn with your head resting against his back adoringly. His brush strokes were hypnotizing and the way he captured the light perfectly had you in awe, especially when you realized it was a painting of you.
It inspired you the way he was so devoted to his work and it reminded you of yourself.
Your days carried on as usual after that night with Taehyung. The only differences being ones that involved him. For instance, he has called you a couple times —he’s completely against the act of texting. It’s never anything major, usually to ask how your day has been or to get coffee. There was no sign of an actual relationship but it was close to it.
Today you had your shared anatomy class and he sat next to you instead of behind you like he normally would.
You’re not very fond of the fact that he’s distracting you more than you would like him to but it’s something you can’t explain. Your pen scribbled away in your yellow page notebook with word after word just piecing together effortlessly. Taehyung was utterly fascinated by it all, sometimes you wouldn’t even look down but your pen seemed to never fully lift off the page. You filled page after page in the three hour class, eyes on the professor but nothing you wrote down had to do with what he was teaching.
Every now and then you would look over at him and your eyes would meet, he would raise a brow and you would give him a smile, before looking down to write.
“I don’t think you heard a single thing he said today,” Taehyung said once the two of you made your way out of the lecture hall side by side. From the way you stared off into space, lips moving every now and then as if mouthing silent words, he knew you weren’t listening. He doubts you meant to ignore him but clearly you seemed to be in your own world right now, just thinking about writing and writing and he gets it.
You weren’t thinking of anything else, and he knows this because he had to grab onto your waist and pull you back to keep you from walking right into the pouring rain just outside. You seemed to snap back into reality and looked around, “Did you say something?”
Taehyung was opening his umbrella for you, pulling you under it beside him, “I’ve written notes for you, you seemed a bit distracted to take them yourself today.”
Your eyes slowly widened in surprise as it finally dawned on you that you had spent the last three hours doing nothing but writing about him. You came to a sudden stop and he waited there beside you with the rain pounding on his umbrella. With a small sigh, he let go of you to rummage through his bag with his free hand and took out his notebook, “I wrote two of everything.”
“Taehyung,” you said, “You didn’t have to do that.”
“I know,” he said with a shrug, “But you were so lost in your writing I didn’t want anything disturbing you. I had no problem with it, I’m a fast writer and a good listener.”
“Thank you,” you finally began to walk again now that you couldn’t bear the cold standing in one place, “I am bad at focusing on anything else when I write.”
“I understand,” he had to speak up so you could hear him over the rain, “And if you do not think I would be a bother, maybe you’ll let me watch you write more?”
“You’ll get bored,” you said as the two of you walked toward his car, a vintage Chevrolet Corvette that belonged to his grandfather.
“Watching you?” He asked, holding the door open for you, “Never.”
Your apartment was how he pictured it—books and papers scattered everywhere. You were still much neater than him but not by much, clearly the two of you focused too much on your craft that it’s completely taken over everything.
Your place was small yet spacious and well furnished with vintage chairs and mahogany bookshelves. There was a slight clutter of books upon books and dead plants that didn’t get enough sun with the curtains closed. It was warm and had your lovely scent. There was a stack of papers on a desk next to a laptop and an expensive looking typewriter.
There wasn’t much of a conversation going on between you, the last time you said something to him was when you asked him if he needed a drink. Your back was to him and he spent about an hour or so sitting alone on the daybed as he drew in his sketchbook.
After some time when you finally decided to join him, you were exhausted and physically drained. You lied down with your head on his lap looking up at him when his hand began to caress your cheek. “Taehyung.”
“Yes, my love?” He asked with his gaze meeting yours. The name just slipped and he didn’t care to take it back, only watched you curiously still waiting to hear what you would say. You blinked once, “I think I’m beginning to understand better.”
You had been writing nonstop for a long time but for the first time it felt like you finally understood your work.
There was no way to explain it but these interactions with Taehyung—your living reverie—have opened your eyes to his character and the way you wanted to write him in the first place. He was everything you had been searching for.
He leaned back, startled by the sudden way you sat up, hand around his looking at him, “You.”
“Me?” Taehyung asked with his hands on your waist, shifting you more on his lap, “You understand me?”
All it took was one nod of your head for him to be pulling you into a kiss meeting you halfway. He had a hand on your chin, angling your head opposite of his letting the kiss deepen, soon he was tracing the curve of your neck with his jaw. Every ounce of lust and greed poured out in his fingers when he touched you.
It didn’t take Jungkook long to realize something about his friend seemed different. He was used to Taehyung isolating himself when he had a wave of creativity. There would be days on end where Jungkook would call only for every call to be ignored. He would even write his friend letters but he never answered him. When he was back to normal, Taehyung would look tired like he hadn't eaten or slept in days.
Right now, Jungkook sees Taehyung but he doesn’t think Taehyung sees him. Despite sitting across from him, he wouldn’t look his way. Instead he was staring out the large windows that overlooked the courtyard
“Have you eaten?” Jungkook asked, looking up from his sketchbook. The two had been on the second floor of the library this evening studying classical art techniques. Jungkook had gotten bored and began to sketch up an idea for another sculpture while Taehyung drew someone he couldn’t recognize. His friend didn’t even so much as flinch and give any sign that he was listening.
A small scoff left his lips, “Taehyung.” With an annoyed huff, he reached for his sketchbook and watched with a confused expression, “Who is this?”
It was quite detailed despite how little time he had to draw this and Jungkook was in awe. For a second he wondered if this was original work from Taehyung, all created from his mind but as he followed Taehyung’s gaze out the window, he realized it wasn’t.
It was you.
You sat on a wooden bench facing the swan fountain and there was a book in your hands. Jungkook couldn’t make out the book but seemed to have all your attention because you stopped every now and then to highlight something then jot it down in a notebook. There were powder blue headphones on your head and you were in a red lace long sleeve top with roses embroidered on and under was a white shirt. The black skirt you wore reached below your knees with a slit on the side that exposed your boots and over it all, you had on a black coat. He’ll admit, you did look rather captivating against the dead green of the lawn and trees paired with the foggy sky from days on end of rain.
Taehyung seemed to have found his newest muse and it was all he could think about.
“Are you still interested in her?” Jungkook finally asked, catching the way a small smile seemed to fall on Taehyung’s face—something he rarely got to see despite how easily he gave them to you. Jungkook did recognize you in the drawing better once he got a good look at you. He had almost forgotten seeing you weeks ago when he was with Taehyung, but he had certainly forgotten his friend’s knowledge and curiosity of you.
“Only a little,” Taehyung said, ignoring the way Jungkook looked at him with disbelief. He was used to his friend having a sudden infatuation with a certain person but they were short lived and always ended with the poor girl crying about how cold he was—Jungkook knows because he was always there to pick up their broken pieces with a night in his bed [Taehyung never cared].
“She’s hot,” Jungkook said, half teasingly to read how his friend would feel. Taehyung merely gave him a side glance in acknowledgment but the smile he had for you had tightened as he looked back outside.
“It’s that guy again,” Jungkook pointed out as they both watched outside, “What’s his name?”
Kim Namjoon.
Taehyung was used to seeing him around throughout the years but he never had a need to pay attention to him before. Like most of those who he sees in passing they never become more than that—just a passing blur that he doesn’t care to know a single thing about. Namjoon used to be one of the ones he ignored until he heard you mention him once or twice.
“Who knows,” Taehyung said, shifting his gaze down to his sketch pad avoiding the sight of Namjoon and you now standing like you had somewhere to go.
Jungkook, the ever curious and procrastinating, kept watching you just out of sheer boredom. The library had gone dark aside from the few kerosene lamps scattered across tables but it was already getting hard to see his sketches properly so now he’s just waiting for Taehyung to finish.
Suddenly, all too suddenly that it made him jump in his seat, Taehyung was standing, shoving his things in his bag loud enough to create an echo in the cold library. Jungkook looked up at him, pencil laying limp in his hand now, “Are we done?”
Taehyung pushed his chair into the wooden table, not bothering to look back at his friend as he stormed off, “Yes.”
Not long after he watched his friend make his abrupt leave from the library… he saw him now approaching you and Namjoon.
You were blissfully unaware that you had been watching through the windows of a library as much as you were unaware of Taehyung coming up behind you as Namjoon talked. “I was thinking maybe we could go catch that new movie that just came out.”
“Oh, I was going to do some writing—You won’t believe it Joonie,” your tone changed so suddenly as you grabbed him by the arm, jerking him toward you excitedly carrying on like he hadn’t said anything, “It’s like I can’t stop writing, you wouldn’t believe how easily the words are flowing like… I don’t know, I’ve never felt this way before, Joonie.”
“That’s good, Y/n but,” Namjoon’s words slowed down as he looked behind you at the looming figure standing a few feet away. He’s never spoken a word to Kim Taehyung despite both being grad students, he only knows of him from what others have spoken and he’s very… cold. Since when did you and him begin to talk? Namjoon took your hands in his as he pulled you closer to have your attention knowing you still didn’t know who was behind you, “But it’s nice to get a break, you don’t want to overwork yourself.”
“You don’t get it, Namjoon,” you said his name instead of the affectionate nickname you’ve always called him, he couldn’t help but look at Taehyung who pretended like he wasn’t watching closely with a cigarette dangling between his fingers, “I can’t stop. I cannot stop. If I-I do, I don’t know.”
His gaze shifted behind you making you turn to look too and your eyes seemed to soften as you made eye contact with the dirty blonde you’ve been spending time with lately.
“Y/n,” Taehyung’s deep voice spoke as he stared at you two, “I thought you would be busy writing”
“I’m on my way to right now,” you said, taking a step toward him with your back to your friend, “Would you join me?”
A smile came to his face as he pushed his glasses up, “If I could paint you again.”
You stood still in thought. The first time he painted you was after you had sex for the first time when it felt warm, passionate and hungry. He never slept that night, he stayed up the entire time getting the right blends of pigment on your body as it lay on the flue blanket completely nude. You’re not sure if he knew what saying that would make you think but from the way his brow raised questioning made you think he did.
Namjoon felt his jaw clench, eyes glaring at Taehyung who didn’t even bat an eye in his direction. You looked back to Namjoon now who waited for you with a bated breath. You walked up to him making his heart face as you pressed your lips against his cheek with your softly brushing against his jaw. The kiss was tender on his face and when he looked down at you, you gave him an apologetic smile, “Will you call me?”
“Will you answer?” Namjoon asked but you weren’t beside him anymore. You were next to Taehyung who took your book bag off your shoulders and put it over his, a hand grazing your back as he talked to you but too far out of your friend’s ear shot.
“What did your friend want?” Taehyung asked.
“To see a movie but I have to finish what I’m writing before it slips my mind,” You said moving your hand to his bent arm walking alongside him, “I’ll have to catch up with him another day.”
He didn’t have anything to say to that but you could still feel his eyes on you. A part of you wanted to ignore his gaze because you find yourself at a loss for words any time he looks at you that way. It’s like he sees through you not at you and sometimes you don’t know which one is better.
There’s no denying that he likes the look of you, he finds you attractive and not just physically. You know that. You just can’t tell what he’s thinking that makes him look at you that way.
“Namjoon.”
He stood alone where you once had been beside him, just watching you leave with the art major he had no idea you were even involved with. Since when did you begin to talk to him and how did Namjoon never notice? Did you just decide that you would not be open with him anymore?
“Jimin,” Namjoon looked at his friend, a bit stunned, “Hey.”
The ballerina watched after you alongside him now as he asked, “Y/n is leaving with Taehyung?”
“Are they together?” Namjoon asked suddenly, “Did you know?”
Jimin shook his head no, “Not exactly, I mean, Y/n never hid the fact that she had a thing for Taehyung, I’m just surprised to see them leave together. Y/n never told me they began to talk.”
Namjoon bit his lip nervously, “You don’t think they’ll date or anything, do you? This just seems sudden.”
He looked to his friend for some comfort but all Jimin did was shrug his shoulders and say, “I don’t know, you know Y/n doesn’t really date and neither does he, they’re always too focused on writing or painting to think about anything else. Who knows, they might just work out because of how similar they are.”
“Yeah but…” Namjoon was trying to find words to say but nothing came to mind. Maybe he was just being bitter… he’s been your friend for years. He’s always been there for you anytime you needed him without question. You were attracted to him enough to sleep with him but was that all it was ever going to be? You won’t see him as more than just a friend but then Kim Taehyung comes along and suddenly you have no problem walking away from Namjoon to go with him?
Jimin looked at his friend apologetically, he sympathized with him. He’s known you for longer than Namjoon has and he’s been through this exact same thing before too. There was a time when he thought you and him were the closest until Namjoon came along and suddenly you spent all your time with him instead. Now Namjoon is experiencing what Jimin did but this time because of Taehyung and he feels bad for that.
“Look, I’m going to be honest,” Jimin tried to work out what he was going to say so it didn’t come off badly, “I think, Y/n loves the idea of Taehyung on paper… how she can write or create him like she’s done with you and I in the past. I think maybe it’s nothing past something superficial but at the same time…”
“At the same time,” Jimin repeated himself with a bated breath, “I see a lot of similarities between them especially when it comes to putting their work first and maybe that’s something they seem to understand about each other that we don’t.”
Namjoon didn’t get it.
So was it not that you two had feelings for each other?
Was it not that you might love each other?
Was it just that you two understood each other?
He doesn’t get it. Now, Namjoon might not understand your obsession with perfecting every aspect of your writing… but that didn’t mean he didn’t love you. He loved you a lot—more than he assumes Taehyung could love you.
It’s not like it’s a secret, Namjoon has always been open about the way he felt about you so why did you choose someone else? All because he couldn’t understand you the way Taehyung might? Is it because he can’t just look at you and know what you need the way Taehyung can?
Is it because he doesn’t spend hours missing sleep or eating just so he could obsess over his work too?
How could Taehyung possibly understand you more than he does?
::.
okokok this was kinda long but I’m sorry, blonde Taehyung as an art major was doing it for me 🫶this was a romance but also not necessarily bc the focus isn’t entirely on their relationship 🤒neither one of them are supposed to be super likable so if you hate them and the way oc did Joon and Jimin dirty i get it 🫡but they just genuinely do not think about anything but their craft.
permanent taglist: @notmyfaultbutours @rerefundslocals @fandems @sugaluvmyg @guvgguk @kimyishin @libra04 @kooromiwrld @classycreationcupcake-blog @alwaysdreamingnotsleeping @cherrymonlightt @nikkiordonez12 @asking4-sanity @thvlover @saweetspoiled @uwu2rawr @shaybts-blog @babycandy111 @tearyjjeon @joons-uparupa @jeonninja @yellowcupid08 @02010802faves @knudsenheggedel @skzthinker @unnatae @aurorthi @beautywine @95ene @taekookstata @lilliankoo @shescharlie @annenakamura @lesoleile @burnahtsw @babybella337 @kooloveys @ku-ku @chaelvrx @minnie-mouser22 @Imeneghd @whoa-jo @evajeonsworld @marvelbun @sunnikthv v @kochycooky @heyhowyoudoin3 @acielelyseen @giselleswifeee @jeonjk25 @ilikeitlikethatt @bangmechanpls @lvr2seok @badbyeyoongi @jaerisdiction @watermelonjuice15 @artmsmaid @xyahrinx @angeleen777 @jooniesxbby @brillantdarling
2K notes · View notes
loakstahni · 2 months
Text
Na'Vi? More like puppy.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Warnings⚠; smut, fuff, piv sex, unprotected sex, fingering, object use (reader gets fucked with highlighters), Virgin!reader, size difference (reader is 7'0 and teyam is 9'2), tail pulling, bit of kuru pulling, couch sex, best friends to lovers, modern au!
A/N; this is a collab with my mootie and bestie @quicktosimp, go give her all the love! She is the best and I am extremely thankful to have worked with her💕
Word count; 6'434👀
Tumblr media
Modern!aged up! Neteyam x fem!snow na'vi reader!
Tumblr media
It was around mid-afternoon by the time Neteyam got back to the dorm houses, making sure to kick His snow-covered shoes off at the door before unlocking the door and walking inside.
His keys jingle lightly as he sets them on the table beside the door, stretching his sore arms above his head before rounding up some clean clothes. He pads into the bathroom on the other side of the dorm room and shuts the door, starting up the shower. While waiting for the water to heat up, he undressed, finding a few furs from his roommate on his jeans. He smiles fondly, shaking his head before stepping into the hot water.
Once he had rinsed his braids and washed his body, paying extra attention to his shoulders and back, he rinsed off and dried himself with his favorite white, fluffy towel. He slips into his clean clothes, a loose pair of gray sweats and a simple black turtleneck.
Neteyam wanders back out into the main room, glancing at his roommate's bed. He flops himself onto the soft mattress, seeing a few clumps of white-gray fur puff up into the air before slowly landing back on the bed. He cocks his head to the side, ears twitching in interest. He sits up, fidgeting with the soft shedded fur. Neteyam sighed softly, rubbing the soft furs between his thumb and pointer finger, wondering what more of the fur would feel like, what it would smell like.
His ears flicker towards the sound of someone outside the door; he shrugs it off as nothing before turning his attention back to the soft fur between his fingers. his tail swaying slowly behind him as he brings the soft fuzz up to his nose, inhaling gently.
It wasn’t unusual for Neteyam to be on (Y/N)’s bed; in fact, it was to be expected. So when (Y/N) walked through the door, shaking the excessive snow stuck to her fur off, she knew to go straight to her bed. Pouncing on Neteyam into a hug.
“Hey Teyam! How was practice?” she chirped, rubbing her wet furn into his clothes.
A soft grunt leaves Neteyam as his hyper roommate lands on his back. He chuckles, slightly turning his head back to catch a glimpse of her fluffy face. “It was fine, a little more than normal, but fine.” he replied calmly, smiling gently.
(Y/N)’s face lit up, “I heard they were going to be working you guys harder! Since you’re supposed to be going against another school soon!” her tail waved back and forth in excitement.
“Yes, but I am sure we'll do fine in the compensation.” Neteyam hums. His skinny tail slowly started to curl around (Y/N)’s fluffy one, hoping she wouldn't notice.
“So, who are you guys going against? I know it won't be anyone from the north. None of us, Tundra or Arctic Na’vi, have used a bow before,” She questions, leaning her head onto Neteyam’s neck.
“I haven't been told who we are going against yet. but I promise you'll be the first to know.” he hums, his heartbeat picking up slightly. Trying his best to keep himself calm, the last thing He wanted was to make things awkward between him and his close friend. “What about you? anything new today,  sevin?” Neteyam asks, his voice soft.
“It snowed today!” (Y/N) practically yelled, “There are also several snow banks that I was able to go play in finally! There’s nothing like jumping into the perfect snow bank!” her tail increased in speed as it wagged.
“But I wished I could join you in archery,” (Y/N) pouted a little, “Seriously! But I can’t due to my hands! Have you ever tried to use a bow covered in fur? My fur bends out the bow! And then there’s my hands! Also covered in fur!” she laminated, fully flopping onto Neteyam’s lap dramatically, covering his turtle neck in her white and grey fur.
Neteyam chuckles fondly, his golden eyes locked onto her bright blue ones. “well, you could always shave your fur off. Remember when we were young, and Lo'ak and Spider shaved your fur off with my mother’s razor?” Neteyam laughs, his shoulders shaking slightly.
(Y/N) looked up at Neteyam with wide eyes, absolutely horrified, “Nope! Natta! Not happening again! I looked like a naked pa’li! Do you also remember how long it took to grow back? Or how long it took to clean up all the fur?”
Neteyam bites his lower lip slightly, holding back his laugh. “Yes, but a very cute naked pa’li.” He teases, ruffling her fluffy white hair.
“I wasn’t sure who was the most angry, my parents, ‘cause I got shaved or Tiri, 'cause we used all her razors,” she cocked her head to the side, leaning into Neteyam’s hand, “We also broke your dads.”
“Ah, yes.. sa'nok was pissed.” Neteyam chuckles, gently brushing his fingers against one of (Y/N)’s fluffy ears. Neteyam hooks his arms around (Y/N)’s tiny waist, standing up without a struggle and walking towards the kitchenette, setting her down on the sofa while grabbing water for himself and her before plopping down next to her. Handing the bottle to (Y/N). “So..sevin, may I touch your fur..?” Neteyam tilts his head slightly, heat rising to his face, making his cheeks flush a dark purple.
(Y/N) sat up, straddling Neteyam’s lap, “Sure, Teyam! I’ve missed having someone play with my fur!” her tail was back to wagging happily as she removed her top. Thick fur covers the expanse of her body, leaving everything hidden from sight.
Neteyam’s ears drooped slightly; the tips flushed red. “I..” his face flushed a brighter shade of purple. He forces himself to not look at (Y/N)’s chest; even if the fur hid her breasts, it still didn't feel right to look.
“I’ve missed having grooming days! Because of all the fur, we would help each other as a family! I’m really happy you asked Teyam!” (Y/N)’s smile was blinding as she spoke almost faster than her mouth could cooperate.
Neteyam nods slightly, moving a hand up and lightly running his fingers through the fur on her neck. His tail thumps against the couch as he brushes his fingers through the soft fur.
(Y/N) giggles lightly, “You’re gonna have to go harder than that, Teyam. I can’t feel anything through my fur!” she wiggles lightly.
“Do not... Say it like that...” Neteyam mumbles, scratching the skin underneath the fur on the nape of her neck. “It makes things sound weird..” he huffs, glancing at (Y/N)’s face.
“Like what? Why would that be weird?” (Y/N) mutters as she leans into Neteyam’s touch; a gentle purr starts to rumble through her from his touch.
“Never mind.” Neteyam shakes his head slightly, shiny braids swinging slightly. His eyes glance down at the swell of her breasts, covered by the fur but still visible. He forces his gaze away from her chest, looking at the wall behind her. His hand moves towards the top of (Y/N)’s neck, scratching gently.
(Y/N)’s purrs increase as Neteyam continues to scratch at her neck. She leans back more into his touch, wanting more, trusting him to hold her up. The thoughts from before had vanished.
Neteyam’s other hand held her up, keeping it flat on the small of (Y/N)’s back, his thumb brushing against the base of her fluffy tail. Neteyam leaned his head back against the couch, sighing softly to keep himself relaxed.
The brush against (Y/N)’s tail shot sparks through her body. Her eyes dilated as a held-back choked moan, not understanding the sensations, “Teyam?” she asked softly.
Neteyam’s ears perked straight up, his golden eyes flying open as he stared at her in disbelief. “I.. What’d I do..?” he sits up, moving his hands away from her body. Afraid he touched her too hard or pulled her fur without noticing.
(Y/N) was upset by the lack of touch now; even if she didn’t understand it, she liked it. “My tail Teyam. You pet my tail. I liked that?” It came out as more of a question as she wiggled impatiently.
“O-oh.. Right.. Sorry.” Neteyam mumbles, placing his hands around her small hips, slipping them around towards her tail, stroking the fur at the base while running his other hand along the length of her tail. “I thought I hurt you, sorry.
(Y/N) fell forward, rubbed her face into Neteyam’s neck, “Teyam.. Teyam!” she cried from the shocking pleasure, her tail lifting higher along her back.
Neteyam’s eyes widened, His pupils dilating. “Easy, sevin.. I got you..” Neteyam whispers, wrapping an arm around her while stroking the length of her tail. He felt heat start to pool in His lower belly, making his body feel hot.
“Teyam, it feels good?” she whines as she starts to rock her hips with Neteyam’s hand.
“I can tell..” Neteyam drops his face into (Y/N)’s neck, breathing her scent in deeply. The arm supporting her moved to hook behind her rear, squeezing her ass gently. “You smell... So much better than I thought..” He mumbles out, lightly tugging her tail. He felt dizzy off her scent, her pheromones driving him bonkers.
Deep in (Y/N)’s core, she felt something tighten, not understanding what it was, but warmth flooded between her legs, something she’d never felt before, “Teyam, what is it? I like it!” She whined, sniffing at Neteyam’s neck, liking the new scent she smelt from him.
“Not sure yet,” Neteyam hums, bringing his hand away from her tail for a moment. he cups (Y/N)’s chin, tilting her head slightly before leaning in and connecting his lips with hers.
Neteyam’s lips muffled the whine from when He let go of her tail. But (Y/N) was soon distracted by his lips, slotting her against his properly, as she reached around, threading her fingers into Neteyam’s hair.
The groan Neteyam let out was deep and rough, full of need. His eyes fluttered shut as He pressed his lips firmly against hers while his hand left her chin, slipping down to brush the longer parts of fur away from her breasts, exposing the soft, little globs of flush, covered in fur as well.
(Y/N) broke away, panting heavily, “What are you doing with my breasts, Teyam?” She asks, confused but trustingly, As the tight feeling from before loosened.
“You'll like it, I promise..” Neteyam said softly, cupping one of her breasts in his palms, gently brushing his thumb over her nipple before leaning his head down. He lightly licks his rough tongue over the little nub, sucking lightly while his other hand kneads at her right breast.
A shocked moan leaves (Y/N)’s lips as she pulls Neteyam closer. (Y/N) sat on Neteyam’s lap fully, as she enjoyed his touch, pulling on his braids. “I like it, Teyam,” She admits quietly, embarrassed as no one had seen her breasts before.
Neteyam hums in contentment, his tail wagging against the sofa. He lifts his head up slightly, pulling his turtleneck over his head and throwing it somewhere off the couch. He leans his head up, nibbling at her jaw before grabbing her tail again. “I've liked you for a while; you have no idea how happy you're making me right now..” he huffs, his voice low.
The moment Neteyam’s fingers touched her tail, (Y/N)’s tail flew up flush with her back as she pushed her hips back. In (Y/N)’s haze, she recognized His words; her heart sped up faster, this time from happiness, “Yes, Teyam, I’ve always loved you,” She admitted, rubbing her cheek into Neteyam’s neck: the glee and unfamiliar touch battling for dominance.
Neteyam gently moves around, carefully laying (Y/N)’s smaller body down onto the sofa. He bends over her body, gently nibbling at her right ear before he moves down, kissing her neck, even if it was just her fur he was kissing. Neteyam’s skinny tail curled around her fluffy thigh, both his hands placed on her hips.
“Teyam! You stopped again!” (Y/N) whined, disliking the lack of touch on her tail. The warmth between her legs was receding once again. In retaliation, she grabbed Neteyam’s tail, gently tugging it while flicking at the soft tip.
Neteyam’s hips involuntarily buck against her as she grabs his tail, his head drops down slightly, a low moan falling from his lips. “Sorry, syulang..” Neteyam mumbles out, sitting back on his knees, gently tugging at her tail again before gently sliding his hands along her legs, gently hooking thumbs underneath the waistband of her pants.
(Y/N) sat up, lifting her hips for Neteyam. As she settled down, her back was to the main part of the couch, and Neteyam was kneeling between her legs; if it weren't for her thick fur, she would be a blushing red mess. “Teyam, I’ve never played down there before…” (Y/N) whispered nervously.
Neteyam's ears perk up, and he nods lightly, gently tugging her pants off her legs. “You've never touched yourself...?” He asks with a head tilt. He glances down at her thighs, spotting her light blue panties. “Why not..? If you don't mind me asking.” Neteyam asks once more.
She looked away, unable to meet his eyes, “Too much fur. Every time I’ve tried, I can’t find anything…”
“We'll fix that now, won't we...?” Neteyam gently lifts her hips upwards, pulling her panties down and setting them on the floor. His mouth fills with drool as he gently parts her legs open, having a hard time seeing her slit until he parts some fur out of the way; finding her tight, little slit, and little nub. “Found it, syulang.” He hums.
(Y/N) shifts as she feels Neteyam’s eyes on her open slit. Her core dripping from his attention, “How do you play with it?” Her voice was meek as She watched Neteyam.
Neteyam gently guides one of her hands down, placing her middle and pointer fingers over her own clit. “Feel that..? Rub it slowly,” Neteyam said with a gentle smile, patting her inner thigh.
Uncertain (Y/N) does as Neteyam says, rubbing Her fingers over Her clit, (Y/N)’s throws her head back as she moans unashamed. Her fur became wet from the amount of slick She was producing, rolling her hips into the touch.
“There you go, keep touching yourself; I gotta open you up,” Neteyam said, pressing a tender kiss to her forehead before gently gathering the slick at (Y/N)’s entrance, coating his middle finger before carefully easing just half of his finger in, feeling just how tiny and tight she was.
(Y/N)’s legs closed as she winced, “Teyam, it burns,” fire flowed through her cunt, as Neteyam’s finger tried to make its way inside.
Neteyam pulls his finger out of her, looking down at her little cunt. “I'm sorry, love.” He said gently, sitting up as he glanced around slightly. Reaching towards the highlighter on the coffee table before glancing back at (Y/N).
Spotting what Neteyam was looking at (Y/N) became confused, “My highlighters? What do you need those for?”
“If my fingers are too big for you, maybe this is small enough..?” Neteyam said, bringing one highlighter up to his mouth slicking it up with his spit.
As Neteyam covered the highlighter in his spit, he used his other hand to gently spread (Y/N)’s legs apart again, giving him room to work. Once the highlighter was slick enough for Neteyam, he slowly brought it to (Y/N)’s slit, feeling the end up and down, pressing over her clit before gently sliding it in. The highlighter slipped in much easier than his finger did, so he slowly slid it in and out.
Neteyam’s eyes were locked on (Y/N)’s face, watching for any signs of discomfort or pain. He made sure he was gentle, sliding the highlighter in and out of her tiny slit carefully.
The highlighter was painless, but (Y/N) was unused to the sensation of being filled by anything, her brows furrowed in confusion. Recognizing her expression, Neteyam brought his other hand to her clit, his thumb slowly rubbing circles in time with the highlighter.
A gasp leaves (Y/N)’s mouth as she’s assaulted by the simulations.
Neteyam’s thumb rubs her clit more, working on thrusting the highlighter in and out of her more. Still being careful not to hurt her. “Does it feel good...?” He asks, tilting his head to the side.
“Yes,” (Y/N) moaned, starting to enjoy the sensations more.
Noticing that (Y/N) was taking the highlighter well, Neteyam let go of the highlighter inside her, leaving it there before turning to grab two more.
Neteyam turns back towards her, slicking up a second highlighter before carefully pushing it inside alongside the first one.
“Oh!” (Y/N) exclaimed, surprised by the new addition. The second marker caused more of a stretch, pleasantly filling her more. She lifted herself up onto her elbows, looking down at Neteyam, “How many more are there?” She asks, as her slit throbs.
“One more, syulang. Then I think you can take my fingers... And maybe then my cock..?” Neteyam teases, sliding both highlighters in and out of her little cunt. His tail curls around his fuzzy ankle, the fluffy tip brushing against her foot.
In Neteyam’s hand, only the green highlighter was left, meaning the pink and yellow ones were inside her. (Y/N) clenched around them as she watched them slide in and out of her. “Your cock? I haven’t seen one before,” her face flushed as Neteyam angled the markers into her g-spot. Her toes flexed, and her legs shook.
“You will like it once you see it,” Neteyam promises, his ears swiveling forward as he takes note of her sudden change in body language. “You gonna cum for me? Huh, sevin syulang?” He hums, starting to push the green highlighter inside her along with the pink and yellow one.
The sight was lewd; even though the highlighters were thin, the three of them out together in her tiny cunt was obscene. Each of them pulled her entrance taunt, as the bright colors couldn’t be missed. It was like a target right for her weeping cunt.
“Cum? What do you mean cum?” Her voice rose in pitch as something in her belly tightened again, stronger than before.
Neteyam chuckles gently, rubbing her clit a bit harder. “Deep breath, you're doing a great job. Let it happen.” Neteyam coos, leaning over and pressing his forehead against hers.
She shook her head from side to side as she continuously clenched around the highlighters, the coil tightening with nowhere to go, “Teyam! It’s getting stronger! I don’t know what it is! Teyam! Teyam!” She screamed her release as the coil snapped. Wave after wave of pleasure washed over her as she continued to shout her release. Slick gushing from her cunt and over the couch and Neteyam.
“Good job… there you go, sweet girl..” Neteyam coos, pressing a few tender kisses to (Y/N)’s forehead. He carefully pulls the highlighters out of her, his ears twitching at the squelching sound.
(Y/N) flinched from the additional pleasure, as she had already cum once, her bleary eyes tried to focus on Neteyam, watching as he placed the highlighters into his mouth, sucking her slick off of them.
“Teyam? What are you doing? That’s gross!” (Y/N) tiredly exclaimed.
“It's not gross, it's delicious..” He smirks, tossing the highlighters off the couch before sitting back on his knees. He places his hand on her thigh, parting her legs a bit more before prodding at her soaked entrance with two of his fingers.
“How can that be delicious? It was inside- Oh fuck!” (Y/N)’s thoughts were cut off as Neteyam slipped two fingers inside her. Wiggling them around, feeling her gummy walls.
(Y/N) tried to close her legs from the oversensitivity, only succeeding in trapping Neteyam’s face between her legs.
Neteyam sits up a bit, spreading her legs open again. “Shhh.. I know, relax. I got you, syulang..” Neteyam soothes, hooking his two fingers upwards before scissoring his fingers apart.
(Y/N)’s eyes screwed shut as Neteyam continued on. Her pussy had never been stretched that far before, let alone feel the pleasures that Neteyam brings her. Each curl and spread of his fingers caused her to shake even more as she writhed in place. Unable to move out of Neteyam’s grip.
Neteyam gently kisses the tip of (Y/N)’s nose, pushing his fingers until they hit the last knuckle. “Look at how well you're doing, little one..” He coos against her ear.
“Teyam, it’s too much! It’s so big!” Tears sprung in her eyes, one slowly trailing down her face.
The same coil from before was tightening again, and she didn’t know if she could take it.
“No, no, no... It's ok..” Neteyam gently cups the side of (Y/N)’s face, gently pulling his fingers out of her slit.
(Y/N) can’t stop the whine as his fingers left her slit; as much as it overwhelmed her, she couldn’t help but be disappointed about the emptiness. Another whine leaves her, this one more frustrated as it seems like she couldn’t figure out what she wants or needs.
“Do you want me to keep going, syulang..?” Neteyam asks gently, cupping her cheek gently.
“Yes? No? I don’t know, Teyam!” Her words were sharp from her frustration, but there was something she did know she wanted, “Kiss me? Please?” She asked him softly.
“Of course, sweet syulang..” Neteyam leans down, pressing a soft and tender kiss to her lips. Gently rubbing her inner thigh.
(Y/N) gently reached up and cupped his face as she leaned into the kiss. The gentle kiss comforted her, leaving her feeling protected. Feeling bold, she remembers reading something once about kissing. Hesitantly, she bites Neteyam’s bottom lip gently before letting go.
Neteyam groans softly, nibbling on her bottom lip before slipping his tongue into her mouth, his tongue wiggling around with hers.
A soft sigh leaves her nose as their tongues intertwine, their breaths synchronizing together as they parted briefly, only to rejoin each other. (Y/N) was unfamiliar with the taste on Neteyam’s tongue, not realizing that it was her own slick she was tasting.
Neteyam breaks the kiss, tipping her chin upwards and biting on her neck gently. “Do you want me to touch you again..?” He asks gently.
Much calmer this time, (Y/N) notices that the overwhelming pleasure has died down to a steady thrum instead of the electric shocks flowing through her, “Yes, please.”
Neteyam gently brushes his finger against her clit before slipping one finger inside her entrance, curling it upwards.
This moan was softer and deeper; this time, the feeling was expected. Letting her enjoy the feelings more, but it still left an ache. The need to be filled more.
Neteyam gently pushes a second finger inside her, being a lot slower and gentler now. “Does that feel good...?” He coos gently, rubbing his cheek against (Y/N)’s.
“Yes, Teyam. It feels good!” Her whines were sweet as she leaned up and licked the shell of Neteyam’s ear, gently biting down and pulling on it before letting go and nipping at his neck.
“Good girl…” Neteyam praised, slowly scissoring his two fingers apart. “You're so tight and wet for me…” He purrs, nuzzling her cheek.
Even after being stretched from before, Neteyam could barely comprehend how tight she was as her walls gripped at his finger, trying to suck them in deeper.
“I’m doing good, Teyam?” Her bright blue eyes searched for his, wide and begging.
“Yes.. You're doing so well, ma syulang..” Neteyam purrs, gently stroking his fingers along her inner walls.
(Y/N) tightens around Neteyam’s fingers as his words bring warmth to her slit; she wiggles happily, even as the coil slowly builds.
“Do you think you can handle a third finger?” Neteyam asks gently, nuzzling his cat-like nose into her neck. His fingers steadily pumping in and out of her soaked pussy.
Nervously (Y/N) nods; each of Neteyam’s fingers were thick and strong from years of archery practice, and she wonders if another one will fit.
“Deep breaths,” Neteyam hums, gently pressing his third finger against her already stretched opening. Neteyam carefully pushes his last finger inside her, gently curling it upwards.
“Oh fuck, Teyam!” (Y/N) yipped, the stretch slightly burned, making the pleasure all the more intense.
“Yeah.. Tell me how much you like it, syulang. Let me hear you..” Neteyam purrs, nipping gently on the tip of her left ear, all three of his fingers pumping in and out of her steadily.
“It’s good! It feels so big, Teyam!”  (Y/N) whined as the pleasure started to cover the burning pain.
“Good girl..” Neteyam coos, peppering kisses all over (Y/N)’s face and down her neck. Gently brushing his thumb over her clit.
(Y/N) jumped at her clit being played with, electric-like pleasure shooting through her body, “Teyam!” She cried as her legs started to shake.
Neteyam curls his three fingers upwards, brushing them over her sensitive inner walls. Increasing the pressure on (Y/N)’s clit as well. “You gonna cum for me, huh, little one?” Neteyam cocks his head to the side, his braids falling over his shoulders.
“Y-yes,” (Y/N) threw her head back as her walls started to milk Neteyam’s fingers, eagerly chasing the sensations.
Neteyam hums, pumping his fingers in and out of (Y/N)’s tiny cunt, gently tugging her tail with his free hand, wanting to help pull her over the edge quicker.
“Ah-ah-ahhhhh!” (Y/N) screamed her release, her slick gushing out of her tiny hole, the pleasure of her pussy being played with, and the teasing of her tail too much.
(Y/N) continues to roll her hips, chasing the lingering feeling.
“There we go.. good girl, yawne.” Neteyam slowly pulls his fingers from her cunt, licking her arousal from his fingers before he leans up and presses his lips against hers, swiping his tongue against hers. Allowing (Y/N) to taste her own arousal.
(Y/N) couldn’t stop the moan that left her lips, the slight humiliation from tasting herself on Neteyam’s tongue building her arousal all over again. Slowly (Y/N) wrapped her legs around Neteyam’s waist, pulling him closer to her slit.
Neteyam chuckles gently against her lips; he pulls back slightly, tugging his sweatpants down his thighs and throwing them on the floor, his boxers following soon after. His protective slit was dripping pre already, the tip of his cock peeking out from inside. “You sure you can handle my osìn, yawne?” He cocks his head to the side, golden eyes blown wide with lust.
(Y/N) looked at his slit, seeing just the head peeking out, it was bulbous, and next to her hole, it was obscene, “I want it, Teyam,” She whispered, unsure if she could actually take it.
“Wanna help me out first, then, love?” Neteyam hums gently, taking one of her smaller hands in his own and guiding it down to his slit.
(Y/N) nods her head as she gently touches his slit; it is warm to the touch and easily parted for her fingers, making more room for his cock to slip out. Her fingers traveled lower, brushing against the tip of his cock, and with her small hand, she reached several fingers inside his slit, urging his dick to come out.
Neteyam’s eyes fluttered shut in bliss; he gently squeezed her thigh to ground himself. His cock slowly slipped out, already hard and dripping pre. “that's it, yawne..” He purrs.
Neteyam’s cock was long and thick in her hands; her hand couldn’t fully wrap around the girth of his cock, as it stood to attention. Hard and throbbing in her hands.
Neteyam's golden eyes fluttered open, locking on (Y/N)’s face. His eyes were lidded and full of lust. “You sure you want this, love..?” He asks gently.
“Please, Teyam, I want it,” (Y/N) whispered, ready to give Neteyam her virginity.
Neteyam nods softly, grabbing one of the couch pillows and gently setting it underneath (Y/N)’s hips. “Ok, I'll be as flrr as I can.” Neteyam mumbles, gently bending over her body, the tip of his length nudging at her clit.
Neteyam’s thick tip bumps into (Y/N) entrance, the tiny hole dwarfed by the size of his cock. A small whimper passed (Y/N)’s lips as the reality sunk in, but it didn’t stop her want or need for Neteyam.
“Shh.. I got you..” Neteyam nuzzles his nose into the side of (Y/N)’s face, a soft purr rumbling through his throat, trying his best to soothe her.
He angles his hips, lining his thick tip up with her tiny entrance before he slowly pushes forward. His tip barely fit even after all the stretching beforehand.
(Y/N) yelped as it pushed inside her, the tip resting just past her entrance, and just that was immense. The thick tip, spreading (Y/N) wider than an arctic Na’vi, is meant to take. Her tiny cunt, stretched far past its limits. (Y/N) rests a hand on Neteyam’s chest, urging him to still and wait for her.
Neteyam gently strokes the fur on (Y/N)’s thigh, pressing his forehead against hers. “You're doing so well, Yawntutsyìp..” He praises, his eyes locked on her face, watching for any more signs of pain or discomfort.
(Y/N) can’t stop herself from clenching around Neteyam’s tip, the thick head simply resting there, as her body struggled to adjust. (Y/N) was always thankful that Neteyam was such a sweet and thoughtful man.
“Slowly, Teyam,” She whispered.
“You sure..? We can wait longer...?” Neteyam lifts his head up slightly, his ears swiveled forward, and his eyes locked on (Y/N)’s.
“I’m sure… Just please be gentle,” (Y/N)’s bright blue eyes meet Neteyam’s, filled with trust.
“Ok, love..” Neteyam nodded gently; he slowly pushed his hips forward more. Slowly his hard length stretches more of (Y/N)’s little cunt open.
(Y/N) whimpers as he slides deeper into her cunt, forcing her inner walls to make room for him, shaping her to the form of his cock. From this day forth, (Y/N)’s cunt will only fit Neteyam's cock.
Neteyam pushes forwards until his pelvis is flush with (Y/N)’s, his cock resting, snuggling inside her little slit, fully bottoming out.
“Fuck Yawntutsyìp.. You're so tight for me..” he groans softly, pressing his forehead against hers again.
Neteyam’s cock came with the feeling of fullness; slight sparks of pain fluttered through (Y/N)’s pussy, but the longer he stayed inside, the more the pain faded, leaving (Y/N) feeling whole and complete.
“Big, Teyam, you’re really big,” (Y/N) moans, wrapping her arms around his neck and threading her fingers through his braids.
Neteyam groans softly, dropping his head into her shoulder. Relishing in the feeling of her tightness. “You feel so good around me, syulang..” He purrs out, holding himself still for now.
(Y/N) rhythmically squeezed Neteyam’s cock, as she adjusted to his size, “You can move now,” (Y/N) rested her head on top of Neteyam’s, holding him closer to her.
Neteyam simply nods, withdrawing his hips until half of his length remains before gently pushing forward again, building up a steady and slow pace.  
Neteyam's hands held her hips gently, his face pressed into the side of her neck. (Y/N) held him close as her heels dug into the small of his back, trying to force him back in.
“Teyam, you’re inside me… it feels good,” (Y/N) moaned as he continued to thrust into her gently.
Neteyam grunts softly, continuing his slow and steady pace. Not wanting to risk hurting her at all. “Mhm.. Such a pretty girl for me..” He mumbles against (Y/N)’s fluffy neck.
(Y/N)’s tail starts to wag at the praise, all the while moaning from the pleasure; she tries to curl herself impossibly closer, wanting to touch every part of Neteyam, whining when she is unsuccessful.
“Careful, syulang..” Neteyam mumbled gently, gently laying on top of her, his chest pressed into hers even if it meant having to arch his back awkwardly.
“Ohhh,” (Y/N) purred, comforted by the touch, her chest rumbling in a purr, “More Teyam, please,” She used her feet to push on his back to urge him faster.
“I don't want to hurt you, small thing..” Neteyam mumbles, brushing his hand through her fluffy white hair. His hips still moving slowly.
“Please, Neteyam, I can take it,” (Y/N) pleaded, moving her hips, chasing the pleasure herself.
Neteyam grunts softly, a low growl rumbling in his throat. He pulls his hips back, leaving just his tip inside her stretched cunt before pushing forwards again, picking up the pace of his thrusting. Angling his hips upwards slightly, searching for (Y/N)’s sweet spot.
“Fuck!” (Y/N) cried as her pussy was taken thoroughly, her spongy insides taking the brunt of Neteyam’s thrusts, “Please, Neteyam! More!” She cried again as her legs tightened around him even more.
Neteyam groans deeply, his large hands holding onto (Y/N)’s hips. “Needy little thing..” He whispers into her ear, nibbling on the end.
Neteyam’s hips shove into hers at a slightly rougher pace, each thrust pushing his cock deep. His tip kissing (Y/N)’s cervix.
“Yes! Yes! Fuck!” (Y/n) shook her head from side to side as the pleasure overwhelmed her; her most intimate place was being ravished by Neteyam. Her cervix soon became tender from the constant pounding it was taking.
Neteyam switched between grinding his hips against hers and thrusting into her; his tail curled around (Y/n)’s fluffy tail. “You look so pretty, taking my osìn like a good girl..” He grunts out, pressing his lips against hers in a messy kiss.
(Y/N) leans into the kiss as they wrap around each other completely, their tongues meeting in the open air before their lips sealed together. They both tried to breathe through their noses, unwilling to let go of the other's lips as they moaned in tandem.
Neteyam moans against her lips, feeling heat start to bubble in his lower belly and core. He snaps his hips against (Y/n)’s, drawing lewd squelching from in between them. Neteyam’s thrusts became deeper, forcing her to take his hard length deeper until a bulge in her lower belly formed underneath her fur.
(Y/N) squirmed and whined as she takes Neteyam’s cock, a deep coil stronger than before was building. The sound of flesh meeting her fur was loud, ringing throughout the dorm room as they both near their release.
Neteyam reaches a hand down, circling his middle and pointer fingers around her little clit. “Gonna cum for me..? Huh, pretty girl..? Keep squeezing me; feels so good…” Neteyam moans into her ear, his cock starting to throb as he nears his own orgasm.
(Y/N) squealed as Neteyam played with her clit, as she spasmed around Neteyam’s length, grabbing into his braids for leverage while accidentally grabbing his kuru and pulling.
Neteyam’s body tenses up, his eyes rolling back into his head and his jaw dropping open. “F-fuck Yawntutsyìp!” He gasped sharply; the feeling of her hand grabbing his kuru and pulling sent Electric shocks up and down his spine, making his brain tingle. “Oh- fuck.. ‘M gonna cum..” He warns, his thrusting growing sloppy.
“Cum! Cum! Teyam! Cum inside me; I want your cum, please!” (Y/N) begged as her core was tight, her walls already attempting to milk his cum deep inside her.
Neteyam’s cock throbs a few times before his hips; still, he throws his head back, gripping the sofa cushion tightly as he empties himself inside her little cunt. Muttering, Na'Vi curses under his breath.
“Neteyam!” (Y/N) screams, using Neteyam kuru as a tether, bringing him into a deep kiss as she cum around his cock, Milking him, drawing his cum deeper inside her.
Neteyam’s hips jerk against hers as she grabs his kuru again, and he whines against her lips. His cock throbbed again, squirting the last of his cum inside her, some dribbling out around his cock.
(Y/N) whines, unhappy that Neteyam’s cum is leaving her slit, wanting it all inside, and also slightly irritated at the feeling of it in her fur, “Stay, Neteyam,” she asks, brushing his lips against hers, not letting him leave her.
Neteyam pants heavily, gently resting his head against hers, soothing his hand over her side. He stayed still like she asked, his body still tingling with the aftershocks of his orgasm. “Nga yawne lu oer.. My (Y/n)..” He breathes out.
“Nga yawne lu oer, Teyam,” (Y/N) whispers as she urges Neteyam to become more comfortable, having him lay on his back while she lays on top of him, never letting him leave her cunt.
Neteyam wraps his arms around her middle, tugging her closer. “Nga yawne lu oer more,” he chuckles gently, petting her back. His skinny tail curling around her fluffy one.
(Y/N) hummed in return, too sleepy to say anything, simply basking in Neteyam’s presence.
Neteyam nuzzles his nose into (Y/N)’s hairline, a deep purr rumbling in his chest, making his chest vibrate. “(Y/N)? “ he gently cups her cheek, brushing his thumb over the soft fur there.
(Y/N) hums in response, showing she was still awake but happily stated, as he leaned into Neteyam’s touch.
“Date me,” Neteyam mumbles, his ears drooping slightly at the boldness of his voice.
She looks up at him, her eyes drowsy, as a large smile covers her face, “mmmhmm,” She agrees sleepily but joyfully.
Neteyam smiles happily, nuzzling his forehead against hers, his tail slowly wagging against the sofa. He relaxes with her, starting to grow drowsy himself. “I love you..” He mumbles before drifting off, snuggled up and purring against (Y/N).
The two of them were asleep seconds after, happily resting in each other's arms.
136 notes · View notes
allyeardepression · 2 months
Text
@jegulus-microfic | feb 29 address | words 1881
hi, so this one is so fucking long, i don’t even know how it happened. anyways, hope you’ll enjoy it :3
first part | previous part
Reg
So
Will you be there tonight?
James looked at the message he received almost half an hour ago and for the hundredth time deleted his response.
‘Of course I’ll be there’ sounded too eager. ‘Yeah’ was out of question with it being too dry. ‘I’ll try to make it’ was just mean, like when you have a big event at school and your parents say that exact line, and you just feel like shit. So he sat there, on his couch, contemplating how to answer the man he apparently fancies. He thought the crush went away with them going separate ways after school, but oh well. With just one dinner, all the feelings came back, making him feel like a teenager again.
He deleted another answer when Regulus texted him again.
Reg
You know I can see you typing then changing your mind over and over again, right?
And that, ladies and gentlemen, was his chance to keep this from getting any weirder.
James
yeah i know sorry about that
and answering the first question yes ill be there
:)
With that, he threw his phone as far away from himself as he could and went to have a crisis while taking a shower. And don’t get him wrong - he really wanted to be there, to see the art Regulus makes, but at the same time he didn’t want to make a fool of himself. He liked Reg, he wanted to get to know him again after all those years they haven’t talked. And yet, he was still afraid he would fuck it up somehow.
“No you won’t” he said to his reflection in the mirror. “You won’t, just pull yourself together. And don’t act weird, just… be who you are. If he doesn’t like it, back off.”
After that little motivational talk, James started to get ready properly. He did his skincare routine, tried to (and failed) tame the nest on his head, also known as hair, and went to the closet to find something suitable for the occasion. How does one even dress for opening?
Having no better option, James decided to do the most stupid thing he could do.
“What are you wearing tonight?” he asked without any greeting. On the other side he heard the most feral laughter ever and just groaned at it. “It’s not funny, I really don’t know!” the laughter became even more hysterical, so James just stood in the middle of his closet, waiting for Sirius to calm down.
“Oh god, this is too good” his best friend chuckled a little breathlessly. “Are you trying to impress my brother or what?”
“I’m not trying to impress anyone, I just… what should I wear? To not look like an idiot?” more giggles from Sirius.
“Yeah, well, me and Moony are going in our usual clothes, so maybe something in between?”
“You mean I should go as a slutty grandpa?” James grumbled. His bestie just barked another laugh at that.
“Yes, exactly! Hope I helped, gotta go, see you there” and the call ended.
It actually did help, to his surprise. He put on a maroon turtleneck, paired it with suit trousers and his favourite red converse. The entire outfit, although simple, seemed to emphasise his muscles, giving the exact result James was aiming for. He put three golden hoops in his ear and finally felt ready.
Grabbing the phone from the armchair it landed on, James check if Regulus sent any new messages - he did.
Reg
I’m glad.
Don’t overdress, it’s a casual event, nothing fancy.
Do you know where to go?
Should I send you the address?
?
Hello?
Are you alive?
James, it’s been more than an hour, are you alright?
James smiled at all of this, quickly replying with ‘yes everythings good the shower took longer than it should pls send the address’.
***
He arrived at a small local art gallery, where the opening took place. As soon as James got out of his car, Remus and Sirius spotted him, practically running in his direction. The shorter man, dressed in a silk shirt, unbuttoned halfway down his chest, and tight jeans (all black, of course), jumped into his arms, screaming excitedly, like he hasn’t seen him in a while (since yesterday). From behind, Sirius’ fiancé rolled his eyes, smirking at their antics.
“Fancy seeing you here, Prongs” Remus said cheekily, when the long-haired man came to his side. It was James’ turn to roll his eyes.
“Are we coming in or are we just gonna stand here and freeze?” Sirius asked, snuggling closer to Remus.
“You should’ve dressed accordingly to the weather. I’m feeling petty so - Moony, would you mind giving me a fag?” James chirped sweetly, batting his lashes at the taller man.
He didn’t give him the cigarette, what’s with his shivering partner, so they just walked in to the gallery.
James spotted Regulus immediately. He was wearing a dark green sweater with a white collar sticking out from under it, black trousers and low Docs. He looked innocent and hot at the same time. He could see the younger man noticing him, too, when his lips turned into a little smile.
“Hi, Little Star” Reg snorted at that, and that was all he had to do to get himself a wide grin from James.
“Hello, James. Thank you for coming” came the slightly amused answer. They scanned each other for a second. From up close Regulus looked even better, James thought.
“You look good, I mean, like, very good” Reg chuckled softly at that and the other man melted a little.
“You look good, too” younger man replied, his cheeks turning slightly pink.
Their moment was interrupted by Sirius barging in, saying how proud of his little brother he is, while ruffling Reg’s hair. Even though he didn’t like it, Regulus hasn’t voiced his displeasure. It was nice of him, really.
Not long after, some professor welcomed everyone from the middle of the room, talking about all the hard work his students put into this exhibition and how glad he was to see so many people coming to appreciate that work. Some ovations. Then they were free to admire the pieces. Most of them were paintings, but there were also sculptures and some photographs.
The theme of the exhibition was ‘love’, so the students presented how they perceived it - some in a cute way, whit elderly couples sitting on a bench or some places they loved, but there were also darker ones, presenting the topic as suffocating or painful. James felt sorry for all those people who suffered because of something that should have been beautiful.
When they finally reached Regulus’ pieces James felt something warm crawling inside his chest. He didn’t immediately understand them, since Reg created abstract art, but the longer he looked the more he could see. On the first one there were spots of paint that must’ve been two cuddled figures in the dark place, surrounded by a little light, just around them, like a halo. James thought it must represent how Regulus felt about his brother, what was confirmed as he spotted Sirius’ eyes glistening in the bright lights of the gallery.
The second one was brighter, like it was some kind of meadow maybe? There also were smudges of paint in different colours - some of them lighter others darker. Those probably were Regulus’ friends and James had an urge to comment on that one.
“That’s so cute. They must’ve loved it so much” he said, looking down at Regulus. “Where are they, by the way?”
“They will come later, when there’s not so many people so we can really discuss others works” the younger man replied simply. “We’ll probably just end up laughing at them, really” he added with a shrug.
At that James pretend to be outraged, gasping and putting a hand to his chest.
“Oh! Am I not worthy of laughing at other people’s art with you? Tell me how can I be granted this privilege, I’ll do anything!” He kept up his act, grabbing Regulus by the shoulders, bending his knees like a sufferer begging for water.
The younger of Black brother looked at him, trying real hard to not look amused, but his eyes were giving him away.
“You’re pathetic” he said, not even a little bite to it. To be honest he sounded a little like he was enjoying James’ antics.
“Yet, you like me so much you managed to rob your own brother of my number” James said it like he was plotting something. “And you wanted to rob me of my time, the audacity.”
“Please stop” the shorter man buried his face in his hands. “Don’t mention it ever again” he added, a little muffled by the hands. He had really nice hands, James noticed.
“Oh, I will not stop till the day I die.”
They moved to the third piece and- oh. James might not be the brightest person alive, but he knew what was on the last painting. It was similar to the other two they saw earlier, smudges of paint in different shades creating two figures. The figures were hugging, not like the first ones, but more like lovers trying to become one. One person was rather pale, contrasting with the other who looked tanned. Their hair was black and deep brown, respectively.
James looked at it with awe, felt the butterflies waking up in his stomach and flying freely all over his body. He looked at Regulus, but the other man hasn’t met his eyes, staring straight ahead at his work. James noticed he turned a pretty shade of reddish pink on every bit of his face. His own lips turned into a big fucking grin. He wanted to reach out, touch Regulus, hug him, anything really.
Unfortunately, from behind him came Sirius’ gasp and then excited “Oh my god, Reggie, you painted me and Moony? Oh, that is so lovely, can I have it later?”
James, Remus and Regulus looked at the man at the same time, each one with a deep frown, not believing how delusional Sirius is. As if they shared a brain cell, all three of them nodded in agreement to not lead him astray.
Regulus cleared his throat, and turning to his brother he said “Yes, that’s you and Remus, and no, you cannot take it.”
As the older turned to stare daggers at the younger, they just started bickering about who should have the painting, Remus and James looking at them with amusement.
After some time Regulus’ friends came and the three older man ushered to exit so the younger guys could have fun together. Just before they left, James approached Regulus one last time, cheeky smile on his lips.
“Sirius and Moony, huh?” it earned him an eye roll and a sheepish ‘shut up’. He just smiled wider and leaned down to whisper in Reg’s ear, feeling the black-haired man’s breath hitching “Text me when you get home.”
With that he walked backwards in the general direction of the exit, still looking at Regulus who looked positively stunned. James winked at him and Reg, after waking from the haze, flipped him off. James just chuckled at that loudly, turning to the door.
102 notes · View notes
jamneuromain · 2 months
Note
😍🕯🎉 with lloyd hansen 🫣
happy 500 followers, jammy! (it's me, petalj, from my main blog hehe) you deserve each one and more 🥰
Hi bestie<3 (yes I followed you right after I saw this request but it still took me forever to write....
okay so for 🕯 I present to you this small drabble:
Take Care
Lloyd Hansen x You
Warning: None?
Summary: He's going to take care of you.
Tumblr media
You look like as if you were about to faint any second now.
Which, to Lloyd's surprise, stirs the few drops of sympathy - if he still has it - at the bottom of his long-forgotten conscience.
He doesn't blame you, of course, since this funeral is lasting way too long for his liking as the priest drones on about good people going to heaven and blah blah blah. As you wipe your tears away with a handkerchief.
It's your grandfather's funeral, after all.
Lloyd bounces his foot on the marble floor.
He is not sitting among the common folks. Hell no.
He reserved himself a seat on the second floor, a perfect spot to place a sniper rifle - which he did, by the way, in case anyone dares to disturb the peace of this boring-ass funeral, but also to watch and observe.
If it weren't for this old man saving his ass a couple of years back in Nigeria, he wouldn't even bother.
Yet, he's here anyway. Fulfilling his promise to "take care" of your grandfather's family after his death.
Lloyd pops a bubble gum into his mouth, blowing a pink bubble when the priest asks you on stage, to deliver a few words before the casket is buried.
This is going to be fun. Lloyd thinks to himself, snapping a picture of you with his phone, and sending it to his investigator.
Now, should he tie you up with a red ribbon or a black one?
Tumblr media
You murmur "thanks" to the last guest at the door. It's been a long day and you should probably head to your family house for the small gathering and receive another round of "I'm sorry for your loss".
But you want to spend some time alone, with your grandfather's body. For this could very well be the last time you could see his face.
As you close the door with a heavy thud, someone clears his throat behind your back.
It seems you have one last guest left.
"Thank you for attending the funeral, the gathering is at our family house on Blackcast Road in about half an hour." You manage a small smile, "Mister...?"
"Hansen." The moustache man in a black turtleneck replies, "Your granps is a nice guy."
"Thank you, Mr. Hansen." You shake his hand. Boy, he has a strong grip.
"No need." The smile on his face seems inappropriate for a funeral - or someone who has come to say goodbye. Lloyd widens his grin, "I'll see ya' later, sweet cheeks."
Red ribbons would look amazing on you.
Tumblr media
Find Jammy's 500 Follower's Celebration here 👈
Questions? Comments? Requests? 👉Send them to my inbox 👂
83 notes · View notes
gallawitchxx · 1 month
Text
weekly tag wednesday thursday!
oooh baby, look at all the hotties that tagged me to play yesterday: @darlingian @creepkinginc @suzy-queued @metalheadmickey @too-schoolforcool @lingy910y @crossmydna @sgtmickeyslaughter @iansw0rld @juliakayyy @thisdivorce & @energievie !!!! THANKS HOTTIES! how fun!
how is your day going?: so far so good! i honestly laid in bed for hours this morning - much longer than i intended to. but i think that's fine!
are you okay?: life has been super whumpy lately & i haven't been riding the waves all that gracefully. but yeah, i'm okay! this too shall pass.
what is your favourite shade of your favourite colour?: i don't really have a favorite color, but i love turquoise that's more blue than green.
are you single?: i am Very Married!
are you happy about that?: yeah! my wife's the best! we have our shit, like all couples do, but i wouldn't be who or where i am today without her. i'm very lucky.
what age do you feel in your brain?: oooh... 970?
do you feel like the good times are behind you or ahead of you?: both! past, present & future good times for me, bayybeee!
do you have a best friend?: many! but in the traditional sense, yes. i have two besties who i've known since childhood & it's a blessed miracle that we're still loving up on each other after all of these years.
did you have a childhood pet?: i had fish & a couple of cats!
do you sing or whistle around the house?: oh, i was literally just singing take me or leave me from rent (both parts thank you very much) while doing the dishes! so yes! my wife & i also are constantly making up dumb songs lolol.
do you light candles or incense?: yes yes both! more candles now, but incense when we used to *gasp* smoke weed inside hahahalksgjsl. but now we're strictly backyard stoners, so the candles work just fine. plus, i have tons of witchy candles too that i'm always working with for spells & such.
are you busy Friday night?: no? lol. what day is it? we have some weekend plans, so a friday night in sounds grand!
if you were a circus performer which act would you be in?: probably a fortune teller (typecast), but i think in another life, i'd want to be a trapeze artist & swing from the rafters!
what is your favourite outfit?: oooh this one's easy! a white mock turtleneck, my black Wildfang overalls, and sneakers!
what's the last thing you created?: i'm working on a writing project for work & still attempting my end of the Having a Ball collab with @callivich (hi calli, ily calli, thank you for your patience calli), but i suppose the last thing i created was this art of mickey's booty.
what is your favourite fic or book of all time?: it might need an update, but my forever favorite book is a tale of two cities by charles dickens. my favorite fic? shit that's hard. eerrrrmmmm - i truly cannot answer this, sorry lolol.
what are you looking forward to?: by this time next month (plus a few days), i'll have hugged all of my favorite people! HOW EXCITING FOR ME!
what can put you immediately in a better mood?: a movie night with the pals! a play sesh with my pup! a smoocherooooo.
do you like hugs?: love 'em! c'mere! let me squeeze you round the middle & bury my nose in your neck!
what is something you wish people understood about you?: oooh. um, i think that because i'm pretty positive all the time, people don't think to check in on me & see if i'm doing ok? this isn't a plea by any means lol - i'm good! - but it takes a lot of effort to keep a good attitude when the world can be so harsh. also! i'm a witch! don't mess with me! *wink*
tagging @heymrspatel @howlinchickhowl @whatwouldmickeydo @whatthebodygraspsnot @milk-o-bitch & @squidyyy23 - who may not ever see this, but who i almost put down for favorite fic! (i'm DAD's #1 stan!) & who i miss every day of my life! if you don't want to play, that's cool! imagine we're laying together in a field of green, looking up at a clear, sunny sky. ily.
16 notes · View notes
mqole · 8 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
hbjhkgvhj ok here are uh. some character designs i did abt a year ago
these are all based on the incredible @kayzero's fic zero win game, which is a rewrite of ztd with akane as the protagonist, and it has possibly THE BEST characterization of akane ive ever read- listen just. just go read it you will be enriched i promise.
im not putting an image description bc i dont know where to start (sorry!!) BUT ill put a bunch of character design notes below the cut for people who are insane like me <3333
ok first of all. i know when i sent these to kay the other day they said there were some details canon to zwg that i missed (akane's lil hoodie pocket, aoi wearing white to contrast junpei's black (which is SO inspired btw.)) so just. PRETEND those are there bc i forgor <3
i spent the most time on sigma, phi, akane, junpei and aoi just because they've had multiple iterations of designs. it was fun to take bits and pieces from each version of them, so thats why they get a feature page
you can see a lot of my little pink notes with criticisms of the ztd designs there. in general, i really dont like the ztd designs, they all feel unnaturally bland to me (although thats probably also the artstyle).
most people whove looked into the colour symbolism in zero escape are probably familiar with the whole red/blue thing: that is, theyre colours representing the morphogenetic field. akane and aoi are the most obvious examples of this. 'aka' means red, and 'ao' means blue. in the first nonary game, akane and clover wear red - the colour for transmitters - and aoi and light wear blue, the colour for recievers. in 999 proper, akane wears purple, to symbolise how she can recieve AND transmit, while junpei wears red and blue by themselves. you can do a whole analysis of these colours and i will not put it here thats a whole SEPERATE post
anyway! the actual designs!! i'll start with sigma. i wanted to reconcile his vlr design with zero ii's design, and initially i planned on giving him a coat, but it didnt really have a nice silhouette, so i ditched that idea. instead, i turned his jumpsuit from vlr into a polo shirt - much like what he has in ztd - and gave him some zero-y accessories: the white turtleneck, the belt and the gloves all come from zero's design. once id included the white turtleneck, making the pants white felt really logical. in character design, its generally best to limit the palette of colours as much as you can, so it was a good excuse to reuse a colour while also paying homage to his ztd design. i also cut his hair bc hes a scientist and he'd do that.
phi's design is a lot more like her vlr one than her ztd design. the blue coat was her hallmark accessory, and im shocked that they ditched it for ztd, so i gave it back - along with her boots and hair accessory. i kept her pants and glasses from ztd, as well as the way the bottom of her shirt is tucked into her pants. they just have a much nicer silhouette to me. between my first pass of colours and my second pass, phi's colours changed the most - i realised i had too many blue guys in the lineup, and wanted to make the colours stand out individually. so i leaned into phi's orange-ness. giving her hair accessory, pants and boots an orange hue instead of a blue one, as well as shifting her coat to a more teal colour really helped make those colours pop.
AKANE MY BESTIE!!!! her design was probably the one i had the most fun with. i basically just took her ztd design and purpled it. I did want to include some more details though - her neck scarf was in both her 999 AND vlr design, so it felt wrong not to include it. i also added some gold highlights to her design, just to complement the purple - her boots are also toned yellow, so it felt fitting. the cut of her sleeves, as well as her hair, felt really natural: i gave her the side ponytail from ztd, while letting more of her hair fall to the side to retain her silhouette from 999. i stole the sleeves wholesale from vlr akane, but can you blame me. look at that robe. its so pretty.
overall i have mixed feelings on ztd junpei as a character, but i think his darker turn is at the very least a fun direction to take him. I do like the jacket he has in his concept art. IT SURE WOULD BE NICE IF THE MODEL ALSO HAD A JACKET. his design went relatively unchanged overall, i basically just retoned his hair, gave him a button-up instead of a t-shirt, and puffered his jacket. the red and blue from his vest in 999 is reused here, but in darker, more muted tones. you can see in the corner of the drawing i played around with swapping the red and blue, but the red focus felt too edgy for junpei. the blue also pops really nicely against his dark clothes, so i kept it.
anyone who has spoken to me for more than ten seconds will know how insane i am about aoi kurashiki i mean come on my name is santa. i think a lot about his two designs: that of the first nonary game and in 999. in the first nonary game he wears a blue scarf, harkening to his role as a reciever, but in 999 he wears monochrome. my personal interpretation of this is that his 999 fit was him purposefully disguising his connection to the morphogenetic field. so post-999, since he doesnt have to worry about that, i gave him his blue back!!! his general fit is the same- his pants and shoes are artistry so obviously i kept those, and i ended up making the rest of his look black to contrast his 999 design. if i were to redesign him now wearing white, id probably go a different direction altogether. that third little drawing ive included has some test outfits for him, carlos, and maria, but i never really went anywhere with them. also i gave him dark roots to show his relation to akane a bit more. and also because i like projecting my roots always grow back SO fast
that brings us to the 4 characters introduced after vlr: carlos, mira, diana, and... maria??? yeah like i said go read zero win game. do it. maria is such a fun character. she was, coincidentally, ALSO the only character where i had to design someone from scratch. you can see i fiddled a little with colour palettes, trying to figure out how to give every character a unique look. diana and carlos' designs actually go almost unchanged here- i think dianas design in particular is actually pretty great, and works as a nice foil to luna in vlr. carlos is just kind of normal. he can have his silly polo shirt.
miras ztd design is. ugh ok look its FINE but i hate the boobie designs in zero escape because they always feel like they were designed seperately from the character. mira in zwg is still a sussy baka, but she's a lot more cordial- i enjoyed seeing her more as a snake lying in the grass. I ended up giving her green because its a fun colour to give characters who youre meant to distrust. SO MANY TIMES reading zwg i was like "oh maybe mira's chill - oh wait maybe shes not - oh wait maybe shes chill again" and i love her for that honestly. she still gets boobies because i love women but i gave her a fun little long sleeved corset top. the amount of skin she shows directly correlates to the amount you should trust her (i am only half joking.)
i wont talk about diana because honestly the only change i made was giving her a little blue strip at the bottom of her skirt, but i'll talk about maria and carlos together. carlos i kept as a little pink boy because i love him and i love pink and listen its my character design ill do what i want. maria in ztd AND in zwg experiences reverie syndrome, which is connected to the morphogenetic field. her and carlos' designs both incorporate red and blue again- (just realised diana also has red and blue. pretend that was intentional) -to show their connection to the field. yes yes i know its pink but listen its red enough. like aoi, i gave maria and carlos both different iterations of their designs. i'm less sold on carlos', but i did actually like the baggier, heavy designs for maria. with those ones she looks more depressed than she does wearing overalls, so im calling that a win. maria's was the design i was least satisfied with overall, but hey i did these like a year and a half ago and ive gotten much better since then soo.
if youve read this far this is once again a reminder to read zero win game by kayzero on ao3
53 notes · View notes
disaster-j · 8 months
Text
Bestie @magicaldreamfox1 said yes on my post about sharing a snippet so here's Buck and Eddie's first (official) meeting in the modern royalty arranged marriage au
~~~~
The first time Buck had seen King Edmundo Diaz The II he was all decked out in an expensive navy three-piece suit with tasteful gold accents that somehow made his whiskey eyes shine under the bright ballroom lights. He’d seemed so otherworldly- too handsome, too regal, too perfect -like something you can only ever admire from afar.
Tonight, as he leans casually on the back of the sofa and stares at Buck’s creepy portrait, he seems a lot more approachable. Still just as ethereal, no doubt, but more man than legend. He’s dressed just as casually as he stands, in a way that appears thoughtless but that Buck knows is intentional. The beige trousers paired with a solid black turtleneck would be a boring outfit on lesser men but the King makes it look as expensive as it must be.
Doesn’t help that the way the clothes fit the man leaves little to the imagination.
Buck stays hidden in his spot in the hallway for another minute to prepare himself for the night. Not to ogle the King’s perfectly sculpted ass, nope.
Ritesh had told him his parents had already greeted the royal party of two. The King was travelling light this week, with only his advisor joining them for dinner. He had a pair of guards that Buck knew had stationed themselves somewhere on the grounds but wherever that was they were out of sight.
His parents were in the library with Athena Grant, King Edmundo's infamously scary Advisor/Head of Security. They were probably going over the details of the visit and discussing the pros and cons of the courtship the King was about to initiate. Laying down ground rules that Buck would have to follow and ironing out what would be expected of him.
In the meantime, Buck had been asked to give the King a tour of the grounds while the grown-ups talked.
Not that he was calling the King a child. The man was in his thirties and single father to an adorable nine-year-old. Buck was the child in this scenario. The one who needed constant supervision and couldn’t be trusted to make choices for himself and had to be told exactly what to do at all times.
Perhaps he was still a little bit bitter about losing his hard-won freedom, after all.
Buck takes a deep breath and finally steps into the drawing room. The King turns to him almost instantly and whatever greeting Buck had been forced to memorise leaves him in a flurry when the man smiles at him. It’s so bright and warm Buck thinks one could easily confuse it for the sun.
“Evan! It’s good to see you again.”
He’s never liked his name but something about the way Edmundo Diaz says it makes Buck’s knees buckle a little bit. That’s gonna be nothing but trouble. He packs the feeling away somewhere deep inside his head where he won’t venture anytime soon and, instead, focuses on the other words that had flowed out of the King’s mouth like honey.
“I don’t believe we’ve met?”
Buck would’ve remembered meeting the King even if he wasn’t, you know, the fucking King. It would be hard to forget a man like that.
~~~~
This fic has taken over my life this past week so expect me to post the first chapter sometime this week 😌😌
28 notes · View notes
capitalisticveins · 11 months
Text
The Balance Headcanons
took extra long cuz I kept drawing a blank sorryyy winky facceeev
- If someone kills Blake on Fortnite, he looks into their future, finds out when they die, and tells them their deathdate with no context before leaving
- Bestie, like Camelopardalis, owns a zen garden
- NOBODY likes playing Jenga with Smartass, this mf makes the tower stand in ways that shouldn't be possible. And they're not nice about it either, they shit talk the entire time playing.
- Sunshine had a hardcore emo phase while in middle school for like 3 months and Elliott started calling them "Sunshine" on purpose to make them mad. The nickname stuck around
- Brachium's black and foggy eye tear things can create a cloud under him from which he stands over the river with
- Bestie is a MASTER at having lucid dreams. 
- Brachium has tried talking to the river before realizing how stupid he looked
- Sunshine owns a music box, I'll give you $20 if you can guess what it plays
- You know how Elliott acted right after Scorpius temporarily blocked his memories? That's how he's like when he's drunk.
- Aaron likes the Boss Baby movie
- Brachium has a scepter he likes to spin around like a stick
- Blake gave Bestie bangs once when they were 6
- Scorpius thrives in either crop tops or turtlenecks with the boob window shut up
- Brachium has tried to talk to the Sovereigns once when he was younger…didn't go well
- Aaron and Elliott would always sit up by the couch, make cookies and popcorn, and watch the Nightmare before Christmas every Christmas Eve
- Smartass steals the company pens
- Bestie's hair, untamable.
- Scorpius doesn't do skincare, but he could be on the cover of vogue.
- Blake considered games like Animal Crossing, Stardew Valley, and Minecraft "the worst of the worst games" until he saw Bestie playing them. They have their own world in Minecraft now.
- Brachium would have an unhealthy addiction to chocolate
- Sunshine likes to keep their hair short, but they don't know how to cut it evenly, so Elliott does it for them.
- Brachium is taller than everyone by a MILE (more like 2 feet taller)
- Scorpius has piercings, I just can't say where.
- Blake has a slutty little waist
- Brachium likes to draw in the sand/dirt by the river
- Bestie owns a hamster that has made 7 attempts to kill itself
- Elliott can't make sandcastles, they deconstruct the moment he removes the pail
- Sunshine on the other hand can make those really detailed ones you see in cartoons
- If you ask Brachium “Is the cup half empty or half full” he’d go “both”
- Smartass calls in sick days whenever they can
- Blake doesn't give up his seat to the elderly, nor does he hold the door for people…unless Bestie is around
- Brachium had a pet bird as a Serenity Daemon
- Bestie is into witchcraft
- You know that scene from El Dorado where Chel and Tulio nearly get caught making out? Yeah that was Blake and Bestie when they hooked up
- Elliott and Sunshine have been friends since they were 7 so Sunshine has met Aaron, he just doesn't know they're dating
- Scorpius THRIVES in horoscopes and the zodiac shit. He hates all Geminis equally
- Bestie has shot Blake with a paintball gun when they were kids
- Brachium likes Honeycrisp apples
- Both Aaron and Smartass prefers orange juice 
- Sunshine and Elliott prefer apple juice
- Blake and Bestie adore passion fruit juice
-Brachium likes sudoku
- Scorpius twerks
- Smartass has a pet rat Aaron HATES.
48 notes · View notes
hannahlovesluca · 6 months
Note
So i heard about u doing nijisanji matchups so why not :DD
Nijisanji male matchup pretty plz w cherry on top
Gender:Gender is nothing but a social conCepttTttt(jk cis female but there were times ppl mistook me as a guy once LMAO)
Pronouns:I don't have any in particular,i don't mind any of them as long as its not they/them
Sexuality:....i..don't know actually.Like.Women.But Men.But women.i'll just say bisexual..
Zodiac:Aquarius
Appearance:Shoulder length black hair,i'm kiiinda tall?Im taller than most of my friends.Black fox-like(i think thats what they call them??) Eyes,and i wear literally anything.Like imagine someone in a black turtleneck and some random ass floral button up shirt with the most obnoxious pants ever(for clarification this isnt my attempt at getting in r/builtdifferentfromothergirls i just get cold easily).Oh and im as blind as a bat without my glasses,i only put them on when i wanna put myself in the attractiveness scale for shits and giggles sometimes i wear random jackets i find in my room like that one hot pink jacket i covered in the bee movie stickers for some reason
Mbti:Entp
Idk my ennagram sorry :((
Personality:im pretty laid-back but based on sources(aka my mutuals) i am the embodiment of a living cockroach because of me almost dying like 5 times(vibe checked by god 5 times and he did NOT approve of me...like mf be frfr) i procastinate until like a day before the deadline cause i only work with pressure cause my brains just built like that(rushing calculus my beloved) I LOVE MATHS SO MUCH U CANT IMAGINE(and the cries of my discord besties cause the moment they go back on vc they see the discord whiteboard filled with god knows what) and im preeeeetty confident in myself unless someone genuinely compliments me,if that happens im just gonna disintegrate into dust
Likes:that one meme where the green guy from avengers goes "why is galora",yugioh,jumping into my friends random vc comedically 4 shits and giggles,resident evil,taking care of everyone(and not taking care of myself cause im a self aware hypocrite),DEBATES I LOVE THEM SM THEY GIVE ME SO MUCH ADRENALINE
Dislikes:when someone gets into my persona space toooooo much.oh and the fact that u can divide 91 by 7.literally unreal.and thunder??dunno it sets uncomfy in me i probably offended zeus in my past life or smth
Love language:
I dont know what that is....i mean like,id send whoever i get random memes i found at 3 am,shower thoughts??and hugs??and cuddles??and giving them reassuring words??does that count?
Extra:im bilingual(swedish,russian,korean,german) so i can make ppl say what seems like romantic words when its a deez nuts joke this is a flex btw.i pace around tasks pretty fast,sometimes im too lazy to get up sometimes i go around doing literally everything at once
Im sorry if this is confusing to u this is my first time doing this :((
i pair you with…
Ver Vermillion!
Tumblr media
hear me out…
• you guys will absolutely nerd out over yugioh and will probably end up playfully arguing and malding over the other (i dont know much ab yugioh im sorry 💔💔)
• if you let him nerd out to you and rant to you about the most random things he will immediately fall in love
•likewise if you nerd out/rant to him he will fall in love bc the fact that you confide in him???
• similar to shu yaminerd, he is a huge nerd but hes better at hiding it
• call him a dork. he says he hates it but he loves it.
• YOU GUYS WILL HAVE MEME BATTLES.
• youll sit in discord vc, no sound except the little giggles erupting out while you read each others memes and random messages that you just keep on sending
• will randomly whip out the “why is galora” meme to make you laugh out loud in vc with others, on stream, etc even in public
• god, he loves your hair
• your cuddles up in his arms, half-asleep, and hes running his hands thru your hair AHHH
• will also send you hot-takes out of nowhere so you guys can debate on it solely because he knows how much you love it
• “banana pizza is good.”
• “soggy socks feel nice.”
• will also throw you random compliments because he knows its the only thing that will get you
• “are you a hot mom because damn mama you hot.”
• will assist you in sending deez nuts jokes to your friends in korean
• “내 불알을 빨아.”
RUNNERS UP: Shu Yamino, Doppio Dropscythe
10 notes · View notes
neyxmessi · 1 year
Note
Hey! I got some interesting questions for you if you wanna fend off boredom, but feel no compulsion to answer<3
Personally who all would you choose in what positions, and as the manager in your ideal XI football team?
If you had to marry one and adopt the other one between Leo and Ney, who would you marry, adopt, and why?
Out of all people (including all genders) gracing the green carpet of FIFA the best, what are your top 3 looks and why?
Okay that's it profiee! Good luck not being bored, tkm🧚‍♀️
BESTIE HI!!! ❤️❤️ TKM
1. This is such a cop out lmfao but I loved the 14/15 Barca team. Just everything about them. So that’s my easy answer. I would need to take some time to sit down and think about like current players for an ideal XI football team tho.
2. This is hard. Cause I feel like Neymar is more adoption worthy than Leo due to age and personality, but for the same reason I also feel like it would be more logical for me to marry Neymar?? Horrible answer to this question, I apologize.
3. Loved Leo and Anto’s look. The black was so cohesive and looked very sleek. Love the sparkles on Leo’s suit (although I would love to see him in a tie instead of a bow tie), and Anto’s red lip and rose bag was very fun. Alex Morgan’s pink jumper/two piece was also so fun and different!! I think the shade of the pink went so well with her skin tone. And Virgil’s green suit was so nice. I honestly like it when guys branch out with different colored suits besides your standard black and white one. Color looked great on him too, and the black turtleneck-ish shirt underneath just made him look very suave.
8 notes · View notes
having-conniptions · 10 months
Text
KinnPorsche ep 4 Rewatch Rambles:
Hahaha Pete and Porsche being besties and joking around while Kinn is having a whole crisis about kissing Porsche
VEGAS WITH THE LIGHTER ugh I know he's just trying to get on Porsche's good side but damn he's good at it
Lmao jealous Kinn is almost as scary as jealous Mile
And again I'm distracted from the awkward "do you remember what happened last night" convo by the huge Deutsche Bank building lol
POL NOT NOW
KINN'S SMILE WHEN HE SEES PORSCHE IN THE SAUNA THAT MAN IS WHIPPED ALREADY
The way he sits right next to Porsche after putting more water on the hot rocks AND PUTS HIS ARM BEHIND PORSCHE LIKE A SCHOOLBOY TRYING TO GET HIS ARM AROUND HIS CRUSH BY STRETCHING OHMAHGAH
He has such a crush on Porsche "isn't your girlfriend mad that you're here?" is like 1 step away from "so, uh, are you single? Do you like men?"
"Since I've been here, I haven't seen you with any girls" yeah Porsche and what is that telling you? You literally escorted his hookup home. CLUELESS BISEXUAL BEHAVIOR
"If you were a girl, would you like a guy like me" KINN IS TRYING SO HARD TO FLIRT I'M SORRY KINN YOUR CRUSH IS THE MOST OBLIVIOUS GUY ON EARTH
Yeah yeah it's cute that he just keeps Porsche's head in his lap and smiles like that BUT PORSCHE JUST FAINTED GET HIM TF OUT OF THAT SAUNA YOU DIMWIT
Fuckkkk Vegas Bible is so pretty
I wanna steal Vegas' wardrobe, at least the less obnoxious shirts and that necklace he's wearing
Early VegasPete interactions... boyyyy they don't know what's coming
Jealous Kinn ayyyyy
Oh yeah just squeeze a little cheese ad into this very tense and awkward situation
BIBLE'S SOFT VOICE ADDS SO MUCH TO VEGAS AS A CHARACTER I AM (STILL) IN LOVE
I replayed Tankhun hitting Vegas in the head several times and at 0.75x speed bc it just never stops being funny
Porsche bragging to Big about being in the sauna with Kinn xD poor Big, he's been through enough
Especially bc he was supposed to bring the paper bag to Kinn (knowing damn well what's inside and who it's for) so I really can't be mad at him for transferring that responsibility to Porsche
Now I want a teddy bear like Arm's to hide behind, the secondhand embarrassment is too much
Lmao Big thought Porsche would be shocked that Kinn's gay, I smell internalized homophobia 👀
Porsche's little speech and Kinn watching with a that smile ahh
Pete is so cute aaaaaa
"Kissing is for people that we like only"
CHAYYYY MY BABYYY
JEFF I MEAN WIK I MEAN KIM I MEAN AAAA PRETTY BOY I WANNA STEAL HIS GENDER AND ALL OF HIS JEWELLERY
HIS SMILE AHHHH
HIS FACE WHEN CHAY KNOWS ALL THE WIK MVs THAT HAVE CATS IN THEM
At that point he didn't know who Chay was right?
"Take off your shirt" and I oop-
"He's mad, so he returned you to me" - "if he hadn't returned me, would you ever think of taking me back" I'm gonna break something
Just remembered what happens after the diamond auction - aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa why did it have to happen like that
THE CORKBOARD
Why is Pete the only one wearing a black turtleneck instead of a white shirt? Why are Ken and Arm not wearing ties? I really thought their dress code would be more strict
VEGAS SEEING RIGHT THROUGH KINN'S LIE ABOUT TANKHUN BEING MAD AND RETURNING PORSCHE
"Saved by the bell" ashdjskdmfnsjdkdb
Tay! Give me your gender! Ahhhh he's so beautiful
Lol everyone sees through Kinn's lie EVERYONE BUT PORSCHE ONCE AGAIN FOR FUCK'S SAKE
Porsche trying to ask Kinn if it's ok for him to accept the water + Kinn trying to smile at Porsche = recipe for disaster
I can't believe I didn't realize it was Vegas who had Porsche kidnapped when I watched for the first time - but then again I was pirating it and the quality was fucked so I couldn't see shit and I didn't know anyone's voices well enough yet
But oh my god "I'll try to be gentle" AAAHHHH WHAT THE FUCK BIBLE YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME
Lol I paused at exactly the right moment to see that Vegas had a bit of a wardrobe slip-up... his black boxer briefs are visible through his white pants lol
WHEN HE FLIPS PORSCHE OVER LIKE THAT UMMMM I-
Oh no I know what's coming. Kinn no. He's drugged. KINN. STOP.
Yes he threw up but he's obviously not sober. The whole scene just makes me uncomfortable
On another note, Kinn's tits. 10/10
Porsche agrees
I'm sorry I just can't enjoy this scene as a fan of 1) slow-burn and 2) consent
Finally I'm seeing Vegas' ass in full HD - why is he naked while smoking in front of the mirror in a room full of candles anyway, like just for the aesthetic or...?
The "reveal" that he was the one who had Porsche kidnapped - THAT I MISSED WHEN I FIRST WATCHED IT BC HIS FACE WAS SO PIXELATED I WAS LIKE WHO TF IS THAT GUY STANDING IN A DARK ROOM WITH RED LIGHTING I'VE NEVER SEEN THIS FACE
This is the only reason why paying for TV shows kinda pays off
3 notes · View notes
multi-lefaiye · 2 years
Note
omg bestie you should talk about some of your thoughts about the founder of lunism
haha wow bestie omgg this is so unexpected!!! (this is a joke, i am aware i sent myself this ask)
(content warning for this whole ask for discussions of religion and cults--though this is a fictional religion, still tread lightly! i'm putting things under the cut after a certain point just to be safe! and because this got long)
alright, so i decided ultimately that this guy isn't the FOUNDER of lunism, but he is immensely important within the church itself. his name is dr. vitaly lazarus and he's the head of the New Moon facility located in the city of Luna, which is pretty much the center of lunism as a whole.
as a reminder, the goal of lunism, because yes this is an organization with an agenda, is to find a way to kill the gods. lunists believe that the gods are imposters, and they want to destroy those imposters and replace them with their own gods :) they also believe all magic is inherently heretical and must be eradicated.
(picrew link: [link])
Tumblr media
[Image Description: A picrew of my OC Vitaly, a pale-skinned man with pointed ears, narrow green eyes, and fluffy brown hair. He has thin stubble on his chin and a small scar over his mouth, and he wears a grey turtleneck sweater under a black coat. In the picrew, he has a smirk on his face and is holding up one hand, which holds a cigarette, as he stands against a red-black gradient background. End ID.]
dr. lazarus is 36 years old and the youngest son of lunism's actual founder, a woman whose name i haven't decided yet but i have a few ideas. because y'know i need a murderous girlboss here. and, yes, he has his doctorate AND his position at the facility purely through nepotism, and he is completely shameless about it. he doesn't even pretend to have the experience or qualifications necessary for his position, but no one challenges him because he has a direct line to his mom (and also because his other siblings are pretty murderous as well, but that's another thing entirely).
now, don't get me wrong--he IS incredibly intelligent. vitaly is calculating, smart, and manipulative. he also just happens to be a whiny little asshole who gloats about his connection to the founder and uses it to get what he wants.
in terms of his role in the story, vitaly is the one who finds out about gaia's whistleblowing and decides to have them.... taken care of, which he plays a very direct and personal role in.
however, what he didn't expect was for gaia to survive and escape the facility, nor for them to start going against lunism very publicly to dismantle the religion as a whole.
throughout the larger story, vitaly is one of the main antagonists trying to find gaia and mihael, and while i do think he has the POTENTIAL for a redemption arc, i'm much more interested in seeing how bad he can get. i love the idea of him and gaia having parallel corruption arcs, spurred on by their desperation to fucking destroy each other.
one scene idea i have is like. a confrontation between vitaly and gaia, in which vitaly, who has been staunchly anti-magic for much of his life, injects himself with pure, undiluted magical essence to give himself powers so he an Fuck Gaia Up. unfortunately, he also triggers a super painful body horror transformation for himself! good job, vitaly!
anyway vitaly is the epitome of a poor little meow meow and i love and loathe him in equal measure. i want him to get fucking drop-kicked.
i also really want a scene where he meets eve and adam, two people who were put through horrific and painful torture at his orders. i just think.... adam and eve deserve to kick his ass... just a little.
3 notes · View notes
acewithacase · 3 years
Text
The writers had to kill off steve rogers cause if he saw bucky with the short hair short sleeve dog tags combo he would’ve had an aneurism
212 notes · View notes
Text
Tumblr media
in which you’re harry’s assistant and harry needs to open his eyes.
a/n: ASSISANT!YN has finally arrived! this took me three weeks and a half to write, so please enjoy and kindly rb with feedback! i’ve had this concept in mind for SO long, and i’m proud of it! this is also inspired by my love for the barcelona pic, pictured on the left, that I think about on the daily along with some thoughts in a dressing room! also picture on the right at the final show is an aspect in the story as well!
also big thank you to my bestie @stylesloveclub for screaming and hyping this up for me while I rave about it, ily!
enjoy a long slowburn of 26.3k words of a friends to lovers fic that’s filled with angst and some smut! genuinely be ready for the angst hehe
COME INTO MY INBOX AND LETS TALKING ABOUT WANT YOU HERE! i’d love to know your thoughts and feedback!
pls rb to share! <3
Tumblr media
16 December 2017
The smell of fresh flowers brought allergies to your senses as you shuffled and continuously rubbed your nose with a tissue. 
You were at the flower shop with two bouquets in your hands as you debated which bundle to get. You were given specific instructions to find a bouquet that’s full and big with the color white being the dominant color of the bouquet, and your options were a white orchid bunch, which weren’t your personal favorite, but it was one of the white bouquets, and your other option was a white lilac bouquet with a couple of white roses and baby’s breath around the large lilacs. 
“Do you need help choosing a bouquet?” The lady that was named Vicky asked. She had an expression of curiosity as she was probably wondering if you were going to buy anything since you’ve been standing in the corner for quite some time as you tried choosing which bouquet to get. 
“Oh, no. Thank you,” you replied back with a smile, and she nodded her head, walking away to help another customer, but you knew she was going to be back to ask you again in the next ten minutes if you don’t make your mind up right now. 
After another three minutes of deciding, you opted for the white lilac bouquet, and headed to the cashier. You gave the employee your number for rewards since you were at the flower shop quite a lot that you’ve managed to rack up some points in order to get a free bouquet. Once you paid and were on your way, your phone rang in your purse. Struggling to reach for it as you were holding the big bouquet and a few shopping bags, you moved to the side to set your paper bags down on the ground, and quickly grabbed your phone so it won’t go to voicemail. 
“Hey,” you answered cheerfully, knowing exactly who it was. 
“Hi there. Where are you?” The voice from the other end asked. 
“I just left the flower shop—should be there soon.” 
“Okay, perfect. Thank you for everything.” 
“Harry, you don’t need to thank me every single time,” you chuckled. “I’m your assistant. It’s my job.” 
“I know, I know. It’s just…I’m grateful for what you do,” he said thankfully. 
“I know, and I’m grateful for having this job and working for you. So, thank you also.” 
“Look who’s saying thank you now,” he joked, and you laughed. “But I’ll see you soon. Walk back safely, please,” he said, bidding you goodbye. 
“Always do. See you,” you hung up the phone, picking up the shopping bags, and walking towards Harry’s place. 
You’ve been Harry’s assistant for quite some time now; exactly two years. You started working for him when you were both twenty one, and he had just gone separate ways from the band. Harry was in the midst of writing his very first album and planning his first world tour as a solo artist in smaller theatre venues, and desperately needed an assistant to do some basic errands and remind him of his scheduling. Luckily as Glenne’s friend, you were in need of a job. You were fresh out of college as you had your bachelor’s in public relations, and being friends with someone who’s boyfriend is in the industry has its perks. 
Glenne had immediately recommended you once Jeff mentioned that Harry was looking for an assistant, and since Jeff had met you a handful of times, he told Glenne to call you in for an interview, but somewhat knowing that he was going to hire you already since Harry desperately needed one and you were a friend. 
When you walked into the interview, you were greeted by Jeff and Harry. That was your first time meeting Harry, and you were quite shocked that he was a real person. Of course you were a fan of him, and you were still surprised whenever Glenne talked about him, but when you saw him for the first time, you immediately thought that he was more gorgeous in reality. 
“So nice to meet you,” Harry said, shaking your ring filled hand. The coolness of his metal rings met your shaky hands, and sparks had immediately shocked your body. 
“Great to meet you too. I love your shirt,” you complimented. He was wearing a bright blue button down shirt with a cherry blossom print on it with a white t-shirt underneath along with some black skinny jeans and brown boots. 
“Thank you. Your trousers are very nice,” he said back, looking down at your pants. You were wearing burnt orange corduroy pants with a white semi turtleneck blouse with a pussybow tie on it, along with some black booties. “Actually, I love your whole outfit,” he added, and you chuckled, trying to hide your blush. 
Never in a million years would you have thought you would meet Harry, let alone Harry complimenting your entire outfit. You’re really living the dream. 
The interview went extremely well and only lasted about thirty minutes. The first ten minutes were some generic interview questions because they still had to keep it professional, but the last twenty minutes consisted of asking about your interests and simply getting to know you because you would spend most of your time with Harry. 
At the end of the interview, it was quite obvious Jeff and Harry knew they wanted to hire you. They loved your personality and how you made jokes, especially how you laughed at Harry’s jokes, which he thought was a very important aspect of being his assistant. 
Jeff exited the room, telling you he would be right back, but really he went into his office to grab some paperwork for you to sign. That left you and Harry in the conference room alone as you made conversation with him about university. You also told him that you were a fan of his, which you thought was a mistake to tell him because you’re sure he doesn’t want a crazy fan to be his assistant and practically have access to his personal life, but he said gratefully said thank you, and asking if you had a favorite song off new released album. Your favorites off his album were ‘Only Angel’ and ‘From the Dining Table.’ 
“Good picks,” he teased. 
“I would hope they’re good picks. It is your album,” you teased back, making him laugh, and he thought that it was a great choice making you his assistant. 
Once Jeff was back, he opened a folder, taking out various paperwork before Harry broke the news and told you that he’d love for you to be his assistant. You hadn’t expected to be hired on the spot, or be hired in general, but there you were, reading over the contracts and signing your name at the bottom of the last page along with the date. Jeff and Harry both shook your hands, telling you that they were excited for you to be along with the ride, and you told them that you were excited as well. 
You had thanked Glenne a million times for getting you an interview, and till this day, you always made sure to thank her because one mention of your name had gotten you an opportunity and a well paying job that you actually really loved. 
Harry also made the job bearable; not truly treating you as only an assistant, but rather a friend who helps a lot. Throughout the years of knowing each other, you and Harry had grown quite close. With always being around him, it was like hanging out with him, and you were thankful for that because you were sure no other job would feel like this. Harry also doesn’t give you difficult tasks either. He just has you go on coffee runs or run to the store to grab him something, but the most work you’ve had to do for him was to call several people on his guest list for a party he was hosting last year or write out his whole schedule for the entirety of the year. But nothing strenuous that would leave you frustrated with him. 
He would also make sure everything that he assigns you to do is okay for you to do, and you really appreciated that, but you would do anything for that man. 
You stood in front of Harry’s door, setting your bags down onto the floor before you reached into your purse to grab your keys where a spare key to Harry’s place hung on the metal ring. Before your hand could even find them, the door swung open revealing Harry smiling at you, looking impeccably sharp in his suit, which caused your heart to flutter. 
“Ah, thought I heard you. Here, let me help you,” he grabbed the shopping bags from the ground and the flowers from your hands, leaving you empty handed as you followed behind him into his home. “Thank you for getting these. I’ve just been so busy lately,” he thanked once again as he did on the phone. 
“Yeah, I know. Afterall, I am your assistant,” you teased, and he laughed as he studied the bouquet. 
“This is a lovely bouquet. Good pick,” he said, and your mind immediately goes back to when he said that to you for the first time at your interview. He said it quite often as you ultimately always make the decisions when he asks you to go out and grab something for him. 
“I thought so too. Also,” you opened one of the shopping bags, taking out the garment bag before unzipping the entire thing, “I got the exact dress you asked for, and get this: it was the last one in her size. Lucky man, you are, Harry Styles,” you handed him the Yves Saint Laurent black dress so he could get a better look at it, and he held it up, smiling. 
“It’s perfect. Thank you so much, angel,” he said, and you slightly blushed from the pet name that you would never get used to. 
Harry started calling you ‘angel’ when you were two months into working for him. With all the work you do for him, the pet name had slipped out, but it stuck once he kept calling you that. You loved it--a lot, and you hoped that one day, he wouldn’t forget to call you that because you would miss the simple name coming out of his mouth very much. Plus, it was fitting because your favorite song of his is ‘Only Angel.’
“Are you excited for tonight?” You asked. 
“Yeah, I am. It’s been a while since I’ve properly taken her out on a date, so I’m stoked for it. Pretty sure she is too.” Harry had a busy schedule. With being involved in interviews and promo for his upcoming tour, he was a busy man, which you knew of course. But it had affected his personal life greatly. 
“Well, I’m happy if you are. I hope she loves the dress,” you said painfully. 
“She will. She’s been talking about it for a while now. I just hope she didn’t go buying it without telling me because that would be really awkward once I tell her to go change into this,” he chuckled softly, and you joined him, agreeing. Harry quickly checked the time on his phone as it read 6:30 p.m, and he carefully placed the dress back into the garment bag and zipped it up. He grabbed the bouquet of flowers and his wallet on the counter. “I gotta go. Gonna be late if I don’t leave now. Lock up for me if you decide not to stay, yeah?” You nodded, walking him to the door as if it were your house. “Oh!” He turned back around because he had forgotten something, and you were holding up his keys already, and he chuckled. “Thanks again. You’re a lifesaver. Don’t know what I’d do without you,” he leaned in to give you a brief kiss to your cheek, which he has done often, and you waved at him. 
“Have fun tonight! Call me if you need anything,” you called out from his front door and he waved the flowers as a sign of goodbye before getting into his car. You watched him reverse out of his driveway and drive off to his girlfriend’s house. 
With a sigh, you closed the door, looking around at what needs to be done. Harry’s place was relatively clean. He just had some things laying around on random surfaces, and you think that was probably because he was in a hurry, so he just placed them on the nearest surface. If Harry were here, he would probably tell you that cleaning up his own mess was so unnecessary and that he doesn’t expect you to, but you know that he’s grateful you’re doing it anyways. 
You were silent as you tidied up his house, putting things back in his closet, and washing the bowl of yogurt and fruit he eats in the morning. It was an unnerving silence, and you just wanted to make any kind of noise just to fill the quietness that was slowly eating you away. You grabbed one of his shirts off the ground that slipped off the hanger, and you brought it up to your nose. His scent filling your senses as you closed your eyes, taking his smell in. You inhaled enough to practically take away his entire scent that was left on his shirt to fill the satisfaction in your body as you pretended he was close. 
As you did that, you uncontrollably sobbed into the material, letting out a heartbroken cry as you covered your face with his shirt. You slowly sank down to the floor, completely sitting down on the cold tiles. The sudden outbreak of your cries weren’t new; they had made their appearance when he left for dates or after he was done talking about someone he liked. When you would go out to the store and grab things he wants gifted. When he would call you angel while he was with the devil who was keeping you two apart. 
Once you calmed down a bit, you thought about how hugging his shirt was the closest you would get to him as you wished you were the lucky person he would be greeting them with his presence and a pretty batch of flowers, but he doesn’t even know your favorite flower.
Tumblr media
It was the next day, and you woke up in the comfort of your own bed. 
You had taken an Uber home around ten p.m the night prior as you figured Harry was still on his date and perhaps wouldn’t be coming home till later. So, after watching a movie on his couch and having dinner, you turned off all of the lights and locked up as you headed to your place for what you hope is a relaxing night. 
A weird feeling had taken over you as you got ready for bed and it felt strange. You knew you weren’t yourself, and you hated that. The outburst of your crying was long forgotten as you climbed into bed and slept the day away. 
Once you had woken up from your deep slumber, your charged phone was ringing with your text tone. Groaning, you stretched your body from the tenseness from your sleep before you reached for your phone, unplugging the charger. You rubbed your eyes and blinked a bit as the brightness of your phone was straining to your vision. When your sight had cleared up, you were greeted with various messages from Jeff, asking if you had heard from Harry or if you’ve seen him. Going to Harry’s message, you hadn’t received anything, so you texted Jeff back and told him that he hadn’t contacted you and the last time you saw him was last night. Jeff immediately texted back, asking you if you could kindly go to his place and check if he was there, and you instantly said yes, a bit worried as Jeff seemed to be worried as well. 
You got out of bed for the day, not wanting to leave, but knowing you had responsibilities, you got ready for the day, doing your normal hygienic routine.
 It was Sunday, and usually on Sundays, you didn’t have much work to do since it was Harry’s day off as well. That is, if it’s not on tour, he gets a nice little day to himself. So, you chose a comfy outfit—one where you wouldn’t sweat so much as you walked to Harry’s house in the summer heat. You opted for a big t-shirt and pairing it with black biker shorts, and some sneakers. With one last look in the mirror, you were out the door and headed to Harry’s house. 
The day was beautiful as the sun was out and the sky was blue. Rarely any clouds to overcast the sun, and there was a slight breeze in the air, making the walk more bearable so you wouldn’t sweat all that much. 
Once you got to Harry’s house, fortunately, it wasn’t that far of a walk from where you live, you unlocked the door and walked in. 
“Harry?” You called out, looking around the living area. His shoes that he normally wears out are by the couch, so he should be somewhere. He might still be asleep, you think. You walk up the stairs to his room, knocking lightly before entering. And what you saw was something you wanted to erase from your memory forever. “Oh, fuck! Sorry!” You immediately slammed the door as you stood still outside of his room, in disbelief of what you just saw. 
You had just witnessed Brooke giving Harry head. They were both obviously naked, and her actions were on full display too because the bed faced the door and Brooke was on the side of Harry rather than in front of him as she had his dick down her throat, and of course, Harry had his head back, simply enjoying it because what guy wouldn’t. 
You heard shuffling through the door, and that took you out of your spaced out mind; quickly walked down the stairs and to the kitchen, grabbing yourself a glass of water, feeling yourself get flustered from how bare Harry was in front of you. 
“God, does she ever learn how to fucking knock?” You heard Brooke faintly say as they both walked down the stairs, most likely thinking you didn’t hear, but you definitely did as her voice echoed throughout the whole fucking house. “Hey, girl,” she smiled once they both made it to the kitchen, and it was the fakest smile you’ve ever seen. No wonder she’s a good actress, you think. 
“Hi,” you said back, sipping your glass of water as you avoided eye contact with Harry. 
“Hi. What are you doing here? Do I have to be somewhere today?” He greeted, but immediately asked questions as if you were invading his privacy and day off. You looked at him very briefly, but remained your sight on his marble counter. 
“Uh, no. Jeff told me to come here and check on you; said that he hadn’t heard from you, so he was worried,” you explained, glancing up and Harry nodded. 
“Oh, okay. The last time I talked to him was before I left, but I hadn’t checked my phone since. Was it anything urgent?” You shook your head, realizing Jeff never really explained why he needed Harry, but you brushed it off. 
“He bought me this lovely bouquet of flowers and a pretty dress for dinner!” Yeah, I know. I was the one who got them, you thought. “Then he took me out on a boat ride, and we came back here-”
“Spare me the details? I already know all of this. I am his assistant afterall,” you said in a not so friendly tone, interrupting her and not wanting to know the details of what happens in his bedroom that entails Brooke. Usually, you weren’t so harsh to anyone, but you had a reason to be a bit stern with Brooke because she bites back. Unfortunately for her, you bite back even harder. 
Harry and Brooke have been dating for what seems like forever, but it’s really only been about six months. You tried being nice to her--you really tried, giving her your patience, but every time you see her, she would act cold towards you. Of course not in front of Harry because he thinks she’s an absolute saint, but she was the complete opposite of that. She was the devil and you were the angel. But of course, Harry doesn’t see that. 
Brooke gives you a harsh look, rolling her eyes a bit as Harry grabbed a glass of water for both of them. She turns to him, giving him a big smile before reaching up to kiss his lips, knowing exactly what she was doing in front of you. She then took a sip of her water, hugging Harry before she said, “I gotta go. Have a meeting at ten. I’ll call you?” Harry nodded, walking her to the front door, giving her one last kiss before she was off and Harry shut the door. You scoffed to yourself as you watched them, rolling your eyes in a way to attempt to hide your pain. 
Harry walked back to the kitchen, leaning on the counter, matching your stance. 
“I’m sorry you had to walk in on us-”
“Harry, it’s fine. I should’ve waited before I knocked,” you tried to get rid of the thought of seeing Brooke’s mouth on Harry. That was the first time you’ve walked in on him like that--fully bare on the bed while in action. Brooke was probably his first serious girlfriend in years, but he’s had some one night stands here and there, which he called you in the morning to pick him up. It wasn’t your preferred task to do because of the pain you would always feel when you would see him walk out of the house he just slept in, but then again, he is your boss. 
It was a bit quiet between you two, and Harry thinks that it’s because you practically saw his dick on full display. Partially it was for that reason, but it was also the way Brooke would treat you almost every time she sees you. Harry thinks back to when Brooke was in the house, and he could practically feel the anger from you when she was there. 
“You know, you could be a little nicer to her,” he stated, recalling what you said to Brooke and how you said it. 
“Well, she could be nicer to me in general,” you raised your brows, waiting for what he has to say about that. 
“She is nice to you. She always talks about wanting to invite you places, but she comes back sad because you’re always so quick to turn her down.”
“Brooke has never invited me anywhere. In fact, she’s never said a word to me unless you were there,” Except for that time a couple of months ago when you two had a little chat that ended up with you in tears at the end of the night. You laughed as you were in disbelief that she would actually lie to Harry that she actually wanted to be friends with you. 
“What? No. She’s always talking about wanting to get to know you more, but you just shut her down,” Harry’s brows furrowed, and you laughed even more. “W-What’s so funny?”
“Harry, you would know if she would have talked to me because I would’ve told you, but your girlfriend has never mentioned anything other than…” you trailed off as you stopped laughing, not wanting to overstep or overshare some of things that Brooke has really said to you. 
“Other than what?” He noticed that you cut yourself off. 
“Maybe ask her if you wanna know. I gotta get going,” you said, brushing it off as if it didn’t matter to you as you avoided his suspicious eyes while you headed for the door. “Make sure to call Jeff too. Oh, uh,” you turned around to find him following you to the front door, “Did you need me to do anything for you while I’m here?” You asked, still knowing that he was your boss. 
“Oh, hmm, no. Don’t think so. Enjoy your day,” he said, and you got off of his doorstep.
“Bye, H-,” you were interrupted by the sound of his door closing. You raised your brows in confusion as Harry never really interrupted you, especially not like that. He would usually wait for you to get in your car and pull out of the driveway, but he didn’t even wait for you whatsoever. 
You tried not to make it a big deal because you figured he was frustrated and probably a bit pissed that you weren’t so nice to Brooke, but how could you cover up her lie like that especially if she was so mean to you? You grew some thick skin when you first started working for Harry, and that meant that you learned how to stand up for yourself no matter who is talking to you, not even Harry’s girlfriend. 
You groaned; on the topic of Harry’s girlfriend: how could he possibly think she’s a nice person? She put up such an act in front of him, and whenever he’s not around, that act is the complete opposite. 
When will he realize what’s right in front of him? That’s been right in front of him for years now. You were tired of meeting his new love interests and picking him up from other people’s houses when he could be at yours without worrying about going anywhere or leaving because the morning would be spent cuddling and making breakfast together. Oh, how you envied the people he got to hold onto tight and freely kiss as you wished for those lips to land on you as he called you angel. 
The thought was driving you insane because you wouldn’t dare tell him whatsoever. Afterall, he was your boss and it would be awkward if he didn’t feel the same way. But you think he would never see you in that way, so you keep your mouth shut and hold your heart close as you just go with the flow despite the pain you feel. 
Tumblr media
20 December 2017
Harry was laying on his back breathless as Brooke collapsed right next to him, deeply sighing as she tried catching her breath. 
“How does it get better every single time?” She giggled as she was in a post orgasmic state. She shifted so she was laying into Harry’s side, cuddling him as he wrapped his arm around her. He smiled, kissing the top of her head. Brooke’s hand roamed his chest as it was her way of showing that she would like to go for another round. 
She started kissing his chest and his neck, and Harry wasn’t opposed to the idea, but the sound of his phone vibrating on his bedside table had killed the mood. 
“Don’t answer it, please. Want you again,” she sat up slightly and buried her head more into his neck as she kissed and sucked his skin. He was so close to listening to her, trying to block out the sound of his phone, but as it kept vibrating, he realized he couldn’t ignore it. 
“M’sorry,” he sat up causing Brooke to pull away as she groaned, laying on her side of the bed. Harry picked up his phone and Brooke had a little peek at who was texting him. He had changed your contact name from your name to your nickname ever since he started calling you ‘angel,’ and it’s been the same ever since. He loved it; it added a little flare and he would always smile when he sees your contact name pop up on his phone. 
“Does she always have to make an appearance at the worst times? Or in general?” She asked, but the last part was definitely muttered under her breath as Harry was too focused on reading your texts. Harry had sent out a text  a few hours after you left on Sunday, saying that he was sorry for being rude and practically slamming the door on you. You had texted back saying that it was okay, and that you were sorry for being rude to him too. There were no rude remarks towards him, but your tone had said otherwise, and you knew that you could’ve handled that conversation better. 
My Angel: Hi, H. I was wondering if you wanted to do some suit fittings before you leave to go back home or after? Let me know so I can tell Lambert and Harris. 
“Sorry. She’s just wondering if I’m available to do some suit fittings for the upcoming tour,” he said to Brooke before texting you back. 
H: Preferably after the holidays. We’ll do it right at the beginning of January. 
“Isn’t she your assistant? Why doesn’t she just schedule it already?” She asked cluelessly. 
It wasn’t like Brooke was stupid. No, she was smart. But there were some things that didn't click for her, which makes Harry and anyone have to explain things twice. She would usually have her assistant do everything for her without confirmation, and Brooke would just go with it.
“Well, I still have to approve of it, love. Can’t just book me without me knowing,” he chuckled slightly. 
My Angel: Okay, perfect. I scheduled the fitting for January 4th. That’s okay right? I know you’ll be back before New Years, so I just wanna make sure. 
He always loved how you were so cautious about everything. Sure, he wanted you to let loose sometimes and not take everything so seriously, but you two were a perfect team because you need to keep him in check sometimes, but you did let loose and have fun off the clock. 
H: Yeah, should be good. Thank you, angel. xx
My Angel: That’s what I’m here for! You don’t have anything scheduled for tomorrow before you leave. Do you wanna get some coffee before your flight? Say at 8?
He smiled down at your text. Brooke noticed, which made her furrow her eyebrows in confusion, so she started rubbing his back and his stomach as she tried getting a look at his text messages. Once she saw a bit of it, she climbed on Harry’s lap. 
“Do you want to get lunch tomorrow before you leave? I’m gonna miss you,” she pouted slightly, and Harry had only glanced up at her very briefly before looking back down at his phone as he was in the middle of responding to your question. 
H: Sure! That’d be great. The usual spot?
My Angel: Yes, the usual :) see you then, H! 
He grinned before locking his phone and placing it back on the bedside table. He looked up at Brooke who was impatiently waiting for him to give her attention as she had her arms crossed. 
“Well?” 
“Oh, sorry I’m actually getting coffee with Y/N,” he frowned slightly, somewhat feeling bad rejecting her offer. 
“You don’t wanna see me before you leave?” She asked in an annoyed tone, getting off his lap to sit beside him on the bed. 
“W-What?” He said in disbelief. “You’ve been sleeping over since Saturday. That’s why we planned for you to stay here until I leave right?” He stated obviously. They clearly talked about her sleeping over after their date on Saturday until he leaves to go back home for the holidays. So, he’s wondering if she’s missed something or she’s just acting like this to get a rise out of him. 
“You think four days is enough? You’re gonna be gone for two weeks until I have to see you again, and you would rather spend your time-” 
“Four days is a really long time! And I’m seeing you for New Years. I don’t understand where this is coming from,” Harry got off the bed and pulled on his boxers. 
“I’m just saying…she’s already your assistant. Why do you have to spend so much time with her?” Brooke asked as she got under the covers as she watched Harry pull on his sweatpants. 
“She’s also my best friend. Where is all of this coming from? Are you jealous or what?” She scoffed, rolling her eyes, and Harry furrowed his brows. 
“Please. Like I could ever be jealous of her. All I’m saying is that I just want to spend all the time I can get before you leave, or I can go with you back home…” she suggested, and Harry perked up. 
“What? You want to come with me?” She nodded eagerly as she smiled. 
“Yeah, why not? We can spend the holidays together, and it’ll be fun. What do you say?” She crawled over to the edge of the bed where Harry was standing, and she sat on her knees as she looked up. 
They’ve been dating for six months, and Harry hadn’t introduced her to his family. It wasn’t like he didn’t like her or he was embarrassed that he’s dating her, but that was a really big commitment that needed a lot of thought put into it. Meeting the family is just a big step for him, and although his family has met his previous partners, that was when they were still friends and not together. But with Brooke, it all happened so fast that his family had never met her when they were friends or hooking up. They obviously know he’s dating someone, but to bring them home? Especially on Christmas? He wasn’t ready for that. 
“Maybe some other time. I’ll talk to them to see if they want to come over here for my birthday or something,” he rejected her suggestion. Home was just something so vulnerable to him that he wouldn’t just bring anyone. 
Brooke sighed deeply, “Okay, I’ll hold you to that,” she said, impatient that she hasn’t met his family yet, but he’s met hers. “How about I come with you tomorrow morning to get coffee?” She looked at him as she pleaded with her eyes. 
He knew that you wanted to spend time with him before the holidays and he wanted to as well. But Brooke obviously wanted to see you as much as possible now that he’s denied her suggestion of coming home with him, but she had been sleeping over for the past four days, which Harry thinks is enough time. 
“I’m sorry, but no,” he said as it came out more like a question as he didn’t want to seem rude by saying no to her. Throughout the months of dating Brooke, he learned that she hates when people say no. Obviously, it’s fine when he says no to sex, but he could tell that it really frustrates her. “I haven’t seen her in a few days because I’ve been with you the whole time, so I think it’ll be good to catch up with her before I leave,” he smiled lightly, trying to make light of the room. 
“Sure. Have fun,” she said sarcastically before heading to the restroom. 
Harry sighed, grabbing his duffel bag from the closet before he started packing. He was simply just excited to see you tomorrow and his family over the holidays. 
Tumblr media
21 December 2017
You waved over at Harry once you saw him standing at the entrance of the coffee shop. Harry walked over to you with a beaming grin as he looked incredibly handsome. He wore black circular sunglasses that sat on his nose, a blue hawaiian shirt with a gray t-shirt underneath as a brown coat was thrown over his body. He wore his famous black skinny jeans and his famous brown Yves Saint Laurent boots that you know he has a whole collection of. His hair looked amazing as he recently cut it a week ago, and it’s starting to grow out a bit as the ends of his hair started to curl. 
As he was close enough, you snapped yourself out of your trance of checking him out before you stood up, giving each other a hug and a cheek to cheek kiss. 
“How are you, angel?” He asked, taking his coat off before taking a seat, and setting his coat down on the chair next to him. 
“I’m good. I hope you don’t mind, but I went ahead and ordered for us. Should be out soon.” You had gotten Harry an iced black coffee, and despite the weather, he was always up for an iced beverage, especially when it came to his coffee; and you had ordered him a coffee cake--the coffee house’s specialty. 
“Of course not. Thank you. So, you’re going back home right?” He asked, placing his arms on the table. Right as he asked, the drinks and food had arrived and you waited for the barista to leave before you answered. 
“I might,” you said, taking a sip from the coffee mug. 
“What do you mean you might? Told me that you were going,” he furrowed his brows in confusion because you two had just had this conversation the other week, and you were excited to go back home. 
Home was in Oregon for you, and you moved out when you were eighteen to go to school in New York. It had always been your dream of moving to the big city, and although you loved Oregon, New York had made space for you to have a home as well. 
“I mean, I was. But you know how I’m saving to buy a house right? Well, flights are expensive, especially when it’s around this time,” you explained. 
“I can always-” 
“No, no. Before you go saying that you’re going to buy me a ticket, don’t even waste your breath because I’m not taking it,” you shook your head, and Harry chuckled. 
“C’mon, please? I know how excited you were to go back home. Don’t want you to be alone during the holidays,” he pouted as he cut into his coffee cake. 
“I told mom the situation, so they might come here for a change, but not definite yet--was just a suggestion. But honestly, I don’t think they will because it might be too late and all that, y’know how they are,” you chuckled, knowing how late your family will be if things happen last minute. “Don’t worry though. Glenne asked if I could take care of Penny, and I said yes if I’m not going home,” you said, smiling at the thought of the shih tzu that Glenne and Jeff own. 
“I mean, you can always come home with me,” he put it out there, and your eyes perked up. 
“W-What? No. I can’t do that.”
“Why not? It’s not like I would be buying you a plane ticket either. We’ll be using the jet,” he smiled lightly as if there were no meaning behind his words. 
“God, you just don’t know how rich you are--saying shit about your own fucking jet,” you teased, and he laughed loudly. 
“But really. Think about it. Mum would love to see you again and I know Gems has so much to catch you up on,” he said, taking a sip from his straw. 
You had met Anne and Gemma several times as they often visited sometimes or you would fly home with Harry and hang out with them while he’s working. They were a lovely family, if not, your second family, you would say. They were the kindest people you’ve ever met, and you’re so grateful that Harry was raised by great people surrounding him. 
“Really, H. Thank you, but I’m going to pass that up. I’ll probably just suck it up and buy a plane ticket,” you scoffed slightly at your indecisiveness. 
“Alright. Well, if you change your mind, which you have practically a day to figure it out, let me know and I’ll see what I could do with the jet going back here,” he said with a smile, wanting you to have choices rather than being stuck at home all alone during the holidays. 
“Thank you, Harry. I appreciate it.” 
The rest of the hours spent at the coffee spot was filled with conversation and laughter. Luckily, Brooke wasn’t one of the topics during your time together, and you were glad for it. Harry was also happy you didn’t mention Brooke either because he just wanted his mind to rest during his vacation, and not to say that he doesn’t like her, but it can be a bit stressful to communicate things with sometimes. 
“Oh, you have to head to the airport already,” you said, looking at your phone and realizing that he has about two hours to head to the airport. “Do you have everything packed?” You asked as you two stood up from your seats and put your coats on. Harry put on his sunglasses, hopefully a way to avoid the curious eye of the public. Luckily when you two were having coffee, no one approached him, but there were some looks made towards you two, but none of them walked up to the table. 
“Yeah, you have my shirts right?” 
“Yup. They’re in my car.” Once you two made it outside, you were parked on the curb and Harry’s car was about three cars behind you. You took Harry’s shirts out from the backseat that were folded very nicely and ironed. You had borrowed a couple of shirts from him when you would sleepover and had forgotten to give them back to him, but Harry said it was fine for you to keep until he needed them. “Alright, here you go. Don’t need anything else before you leave right?” 
“Actually, if you’re not busy doing anything, do you want to drop me off at the airport? I can call ahead of time and tell them that my driver isn’t going to take me, so we have access to the back,” he said with hopeful eyes. 
“Oh okay, sure,” you smiled softly. 
“Great,” he gave you a big smile before looking down at his phone, and you assumed he was texting Kyle, his driver, that he didn’t need to pick him up anymore. “Okay, I’ll see you at my place? I just have to get my shit.” 
“Okay, race you there! Wait, no, just kidding. Really, drive safe,” you chuckled, and Harry laughed. 
You met Harry at his house which was only about ten minutes from the coffee shop. His car was already in the driveway when you had pulled up, and you just decided to wait outside by your car for him, popping open the trunk. A few minutes later, Harry came out with his duffel bag, locking the door behind him. 
He put his stuff in the trunk before hopping into the passenger seat of your car, and you were off to the airport. 
Traffic was a bit heavy, but you made it just in time for Harry to check in and get settled without having to worry if he was late or not. You had pulled into an underground garage of the airport, and got out of the car as Harry got his stuff out from the trunk. 
“Guess I’ll see you on New Years?” You stood in front of Harry behind your car. He nodded before taking you into your arms. 
“Yeah, I’ll see you then. Let me know if you’re going back home or if you decide to join us,” he said into your ear as he hugged you tightly around your waist. Your arms were looped around his shoulders, giving him a warm squeeze. 
“I will. Have a safe flight, and text me when you land,” you said back into his ear. 
“Always do.” 
Both of you pulled away, but his touch had still lingered on your arm; raking his hand slowly down your arm as he walked away, and you had wished you weren’t wearing a coat with many layers underneath just so you could feel his hand on your bare skin. 
“Don’t miss me too much,” you teased. Harry turned around and smirked; the one that made your stomach do flips. 
“You know I will. Gonna miss me too?” He asked in return. 
“Always do, H. Always do,” you blew a kiss at him, and he caught it, placing his hand on his heart before walking through the doors. 
You sighed as you got into your car before pulling out of the garage and driving back home. 
It may seem a little peculiar on how you two ask towards one another despite him having a girlfriend, but it’s always been like that between you two. It all started when you were at a party right beside Harry, and a few friends of his went up to you two and asked when you two were going to get together. At that time, your heart stopped because you had just figured out that you had feelings for him. But Harry responded with “until she lets me,” and it was meant to tease you, but it had left you in confusion. 
Since then, you two would tease each other and somewhat act like you were together, but it had died down a tad bit ever since he’s gotten a girlfriend. And although Harry is a natural charmer, you two were best friends, so there was a tad bit platonic flirting between you two. 
But you wished that he would see past the best friend line and assistant line. 
Tumblr media
31 December 2017 
The cold air from the room had made goosebumps rise onto your skin, although it seemed warm in the room from the crowd that was gathering rather quickly while the music started becoming louder, and chatter and laughs filled the room. 
You were talking with Glenne and observing the people around you at the same time; everyone was wearing their best attire for the new year, and you were as well. You were wearing a red silk dress that hugged you just right as the material in the back dropped to your mid back, showing almost the entirety of your back. You wore nude four inch heels, feeling like the height of your shoe was enough so you weren’t completely struggling to walk throughout the night. And your makeup was sparkling with gold colored eyeshadow and a red lip. You looked hot, and you knew it. 
One of Jeff’s friends had booked a hotel room on the top floor, literally right next to the ball drop, so everyone can just look out the window rather than going outside in the freezing weather. 
It was nice to dress up after being cozied up throughout Christmas. You had decided to go back home after all, buying your plane ticket right when you got home from dropping Harry off at the airport. It was a bit pricey because of the fact that you were buying the ticket a day before the scheduled time the flight is supposed to take off, and considering that it was the holiday season as well. But you had gotten a Christmas bonus unexpectedly, and everything worked out. 
You enjoyed your time with your family and getting to spend a week with them before you had to leave for New York again for New Years. 
You also hadn’t expected to receive a gift from Harry on Christmas morning when your mom was passing gifts out. With a confused expression, you took the big box from your mom’s hands that was wrapped in red and white festive wrapping paper with a bow on it. Once you opened it, you had softly gasped when you saw the items inside; it was all of your favorite things, including some extra items Harry had picked out for himself. He had gotten you a much bigger planner, for the next year, that will help for work, and you smiled, knowing that he had remembered you talking about how much you wanted the planner so badly. The box also contained some of your favorite snacks, little Knick knacks that reminded him of you, and a velvet rectangle box that held a small diamond pendant attached to a thin gold chain. 
It was absolutely stunning, and Harry must’ve spent a lot on it, but he didn’t mind. He thought it was going to look so beautiful on you, and it made you feel special that you were wearing something so meaningful from someone that means so much to you. 
The gold chain sat perfectly on your collarbones, and you hadn’t taken it off ever since you received it; only when you showered, but you put it right back on after. 
The volume of the room had increased, and you turned your head towards the door and found Harry walking in with a bright smile on his face, and of course, Brooke right alongside him with her arm looped with his. 
They looked absolutely stunning together as they walked inside the building as they greeted everyone with big smiles. They radiated perfection and luxury as everyone’s eyes were on them as if they were a piece of art hung up high in the gallery--worthy enough to be looked at. But your eyes were placed on one person in the room, and you so wished you were right beside him instead of her. 
The couple had made their way through the crowd when Harry spotted Jeff in the corner. With Harry leading the two of them with their hands interlocked together, they greeted Jeff and Glenne before Harry let go of Brooke’s hand to give you a hug. 
“Hey, angel,” he smiled, wrapping his arms around your waist as he slightly picked you up off the ground. His hands met the exposed skin of your back and he felt goosebumps rise onto your skin as his cool metal rings touched your skin. 
“Hi, H. How are you?” You asked against his ear and he set you down on your feet before pulling away. 
“Good, good. Missed you.” 
You blushed, “Miss you too. Also, thank you again for your present, it was so thoughtful and lovely.” 
“I’m so happy you liked it. Thank you for yours as well. I love it a lot,” he beamed as he looked down at you. You had given Harry three presents. The first one being a black soft leather journal with his initials engraved in the middle and spine of the journal in gold. The second gift was a manicure set because he recently started to paint his nails, so you wanted him to have all the tools and colors he needed. The third gift was a photo album of his success (you also threw in a couple of you and him). You told him that he can look at it anytime he wants, but it’s just a reminder of how proud you are of him and how far he’s gone; and you would be adding more in the future. It had made him tear up a bit as he found the gifts to be so sweet and sentimental of you. 
“Hi, Brooke,” you greeted with a small smile, and you saw her face beam as she hugged you, but you knew that it was definitely a fake one to put up an act in front of her boyfriend. 
“How are you, girl?! I feel like I haven’t seen you in forever!” She yelled over the loud music. 
“Good, thanks. How are you?” 
“Great! Did you see what Harry got me for Christmas?” She waved her arm out to show you the diamond bracelet that sat on her wrist. It was very beautiful, you had to admit. It was very Brooke, and you were glad Harry didn’t ask you for any help with trying to find her a Christmas present. 
“I’m gonna get another drink,” you excused yourself, not really wanting to be around her much longer as she smirked and tried to flaunt her gift in your face. But you didn’t let it get to you because you truly loved the gifts Harry had gotten you, and it made it extra special because he put so much thought into it. 
You made your way to the bar, downing the remains of your drink before asking the cute bartender for another one. 
“Having fun?” He asked with a smile as he set your drink down onto a black square napkin. 
“Sure, let’s just say that,” you chuckled sarcastically before throwing your head back to take the entire cup of alcohol down your throat. 
“Thanks,” you set the glass down before walking away. 
You wanted to go back to where Glenne was standing, but you had bumped into some friends that you had met through Jeff on your way, so you had to catch up with them and tell them everything that’s going on with you after they told you their whole life story. 
The hours to the new year went by pretty quickly. You ended up hanging out with a few friends and going outside with them to have a smoke. The alcohol and weed had eased you, and you actually had a really fun time with them. The idea of Brooke clinging onto Harry had left your mind and you loosened up, smiling and dancing along with drinking. 
There were five minutes left until midnight, and everyone was gathered next to the window that overlooked Times Square. The volume in the room was loud as everyone screamed and laughed—excited for the new year. 
You were standing next to Harry, and of course Brooke on the other side of him. Glenne and Jeff were on the left of Brooke, and both of the couples had their arms around each other as the only thing you were holding was a glass of tequila as you didn’t have anyone to celebrate the new year with. 
“Ten! Nine! Eight! Seven! Six!” Everyone chanted, and you chuckled, laughing at your loneliness when there were so many people around you. Your eyes watered up, crossing your arms as you looked at the shining lights through the window.
“Five! Four! Three! Two! One! Happy New Year!” The sounds of cheers and party horns erupted in the room as people took each other against their lips. 
You slightly glanced right next to you and saw Harry and Brooke kissing lovingly as she smiled into the kiss, along with Jeff and Glenne. 
You turned away, looking out at the window as you raised your glass. “Cheers,” you whispered to yourself before throwing your head back and consuming your tequila shot. 
Everyone was so consumed in one another that nobody noticed the tears streaming down your face as the loneliness you had felt physically and mentally took over. 
Tumblr media
4 January 2018 
Harry was standing on the elevated box in front of a mirror. He was wearing a sparkly pink suit with gold lining on the seams, along with a gold shirt with a pussybow. Harry Lambert was behind up, straightening out the jacket. 
You had sat on the couch of the large private dressing room as you observed. Harry looked at you through the mirror, giving you no emotion. You smiled, but he didn’t smile back; only looking away and taking his attention on the suit. You furrowed your brow, confused as to why he was looking at you like that and so coldly. 
You stood up, walking over to him. “It looks great, H.” 
“Thanks,” he said quickly. 
“Think you can dance in it?” You teased as you smirked, trying to add some sort of lightness to see if his cold looks were accidental. 
“Pretty sure,” his tone was very short, and your smirk fell. 
“Wait right here. Just need to get something really quick for the pants,” Harry Lambert said before walking out of the dressing room. 
There was a moment of silence, and Harry pulled on the suit jacket so it sits nicely on him. By this point, he would’ve asked for your opinion and for some reassurance because sometimes he needs those extra words that tell him it doesn’t look too much or weird on him. But you got silence. 
“Is everything okay?” You asked warily. 
“Yeah.” 
“You sure?” You still weren’t convinced enough. 
“Yes, now can you please stop asking me? Fuck,” He rolled his eyes, voice slightly raised. 
“What is your problem?” Your brows furrowed. 
“What my problem is, is that you won’t leave me the fuck alone nor would you stop talking. I’m just trying to do some fittings, but you wouldn’t stop talking,” he huffed. He didn’t even turn around, just kept looking at himself in the mirror. 
You scoffed, grabbing your bag from off the couch. “Don’t fucking ask me to come with you if you didn’t want me here.” You headed for the exit before turning around at the last second. “And next time, look me in the eye and tell me that shit,” you said before you completely exit the building and head towards your apartment. 
You’ve never been so annoyed before, and that says a lot because you deal with a lot of people from the industry and Brooke. You didn’t know what came over him because he’s never talked to you like that nor has he raised his voice at you. With utter confusion, you sat on your couch, taking off your shoes for the day since you didn’t have any other work to do for the day, and you thought going with him to his fitting was a waste of time if he was going to act all pissy on you. 
Only moments later, you heard a knock on your door, and you immediately knew it was Harry probably coming by to tell you that he was sorry and he didn’t mean to say those words. But words are words and despite not meaning to say them, they still came out meaning that he was thinking it. But since this was Harry, the kindest human you’ve ever met, you opened the door because he’s your best friend and you deserve an apology. 
Huffing, you opened the door to find Harry standing on your doorstep with his head down and a slight frown to his face. Without saying anything, you moved to the side, opening the door wider for him to walk through, which he does. You walk over to the couch and take a seat; Harry sitting on the other side. The fact that you weren’t saying anything was killing him, but he doesn’t blame you. You crossed your arms as you waited for him to say something, and he inhaled deeply before he spoke. 
“I’m sorry for what I said back there. I shouldn’t have taken all my anger out on you because you don’t deserve that whatsoever. You were just trying to make sure I was okay, and I really appreciate that,” he resented himself for acting that way towards you. His eyes were red and he looked quite sad, and you want to know what made him originally feel this way. 
“Why were you so mad to begin with?” You asked curiously, and he sighed as you brushed away his apology. 
“Brooke and I have been fighting--ever since New Years. She claimed that I was always hanging out with you and that I left her at the party to be with you, but that’s not true right? I feel like I barely saw you during the party,” his brows furrowed in confusion. He was right; you barely even hung out with him during New Years because you were some other friends, and the only time you really spoke to him was when he arrived and after the countdown, but that was it. 
“Why is she so…” you trailed off, not wanting to sound so offensive towards his girlfriend. 
“You can say it.” 
“Possessive? Obsessive? Threatened by me? I mean I get that you’re her boyfriend, but I haven’t done anything to trigger that, have I?” You tilted your head as if you were thinking. You were never the one to steal someone’s boyfriend because that wasn’t any of your business; no matter how much you liked that person. But your attitude towards Harry was very much best friend-like. You miss him on days when you don’t see him, you give him big hugs when you reunite, you give each other friendly kisses on the cheek in a way to say ‘thanks,’ but it was never meant to steal him away from her. 
“No, you haven’t. I don’t know… I feel like she’s always had this problem with you because you’re my best friend, but also assistant--the closest person to me. I always tell her that she has nothing to worry about, but she doesn’t trust me for some reason.” 
“I’m sorry, H,” you said, placing your hand on his knee in a way to comfort him. He placed his hand right over yours in a way to say ‘thank you for understanding.’ 
“I should be the one apologizing. You didn’t do anything wrong. I really am sorry for how coldly I acted towards you,” he softly smiled, and you gave him one back. 
“It’s okay. Was it unnecessary? Yes. But it was one time,” you forgave him. 
“You’re the best. But I should get going to finish up the fittings,” he said, standing up from the couch. You stood up, walking him to the door. “I’ll see you?” You nodded, giving him a big hug. He embraced you with both arms as he squeezed tightly before he walked out the door. You figured there was no point in going with him since he only has a couple of suits to try on, so you stayed back. 
About thirty minutes later, your phone vibrated. Seeing Harry’s contact name, you smiled to yourself. 
H: Attachment: 2 images 
How do these look?
You chuckled. He had sent you mirror pictures, holding up a peace sign as he was in a sparkly blue suit. 
My Angel: You look like Cinderella lmao
I love it!
Harry smiled. He was about to text you some silly joke about being Prince Charming while you’re the princess, but he heard a voice at the door, making him stop what he was doing. 
“Hey, babe!” Harry looked up and saw Brooke walk in. His eyes widened as he turned around, and she gave him a kiss. 
“W-What are you doing here?” He asked, confused. 
“Jeff said you’d be here, so I decided to surprise you!” She said cheerfully, holding his hands. 
“O-Oh, I’m very surprised,” he chuckled nervously. He didn’t really know why he was nervous, but possibly the fact that if he hadn’t snapped at you, then you would still be in the room, which would have raised questions and yet another argument with Brooke. 
“I figured after you’re finished, we could get an early dinner and you could come back to my place?” She suggested. “Think we need to talk about some things.” 
“Yeah, that sounds good. I have about two more suits, so you can wait outside-”
“Silly! No, I’ll wait here,” she took a seat on the couch you were just sitting on thirty minutes ago. He nodded without saying anything before he proceeded on to his next suit. 
You looked down at your phone on Harry’s message thread, waiting for his reply. You saw the text bubbles pop up and you smiled, waiting for him to say some corny joke, but they went away. You waited for a moment, so they could pop back up, but they didn’t. So, you shrugged, locking your phone, and wondering if he got caught up in something, so he couldn’t reply. 
Tumblr media
1 February 2018
It was Harry’s birthday and the crowd was rolling in. 
He decided he wanted to spend his birthday in Los Angeles since most of his friends are there anyways. Plus, it’s a small get together before the tour starts next month and then he would be all over the place. He wanted a semi small party at his house, nothing too crazy, he just wanted everyone he cares about at the party. Anne and Gemma flew in the day before to join in on the fun, and you were excited to see them because you missed them like crazy. 
“Angel! This party is great! Thank you for keeping it so nice and small,” Harry said, giving you a hug. He also handed you your favorite drink, which is a whiskey on the rocks. 
“I’m happy you like it, birthday boy,” you smiled as you watched everyone gather into his Malibu house. There were about thirty people in total that were on the guest list, only adding people Harry was close to.
“Ah, there’s mum and Gem. Let’s say hi,” he told you, and you excitedly smiled, walking towards the door. 
“Mum!” Harry called out, and Anne’s eyes lightened up. 
“Oh, my baby! Happy birthday, my love,” she kissed his cheeks as he hugged her. 
“Hi, Gems,” he greeted his sister, also giving her a hug. 
“Happy birthday baby brother. One more year and you’ll be a quarter of a century,” she joked, and Harry chuckled. 
“Ha ha, very funny. I’m so happy you guys are-” 
“Y/N? Is that you? Oh my god, come here you!” Anne interrupted Harry once she saw you. Her eyes widened and she was smiling like crazy as you walked towards her, giving her a lovely hug. “Oh, darling. It’s been a while since I saw you!” 
“Yeah, it really has been. You both still look so amazing,” you said, giving Gemma a hug. 
“Please, you’re too sweet to us. How have you been? Don’t want to quit just yet because of this one?” Anne joked, nudging Harry as he playfully rolled his eyes. 
“Heyyy,” his brows furrowed, and Anne pinched his cheek. 
“I’ve been good. And not yet. Give me about five months and we’ll get back to this conversation,” you joked back, looking at Harry to see him frowning. You looped your arm around his waist, giving him a hug, and he stopped frowning; his face turning into a small smirk. 
“Let’s definitely catch up later. I’m going to say hi to Jeff and Glenne. Be right back,” Anne said before walking through the crowd, Gemma following her. 
You and Harry were alone again as you two sipped on your drinks. Some people said hi to them, but not making conversation for too long as they wanted to get another drink or food. 
“Is Brooke here? Haven’t seen her,” you asked curiously. Harry’s face dropped, and you looked at him confusingly. 
“Oh, fuck,” he pinched the top of his nose as he looked down, shaking his head. 
“What?” 
“I totally forgot she was coming,” he said, and you fought the urge to laugh. 
“How did you forget your own girlfriend?” 
“I don’t know--I was just so focused on the tour and this party that it slipped my mind that she was coming,” he sighed. 
“Oh okay. What’s so bad about her being here?” You wondered. 
“That means she’s gonna meet mum and Gem.” Your mouth formed an ‘o’ as if realization struck you, and Harry nodded his head as if he was saying ‘yeah, that’s why.’ 
“Better prepare for that because I could already hear her laugh,” you placed your hand on his shoulder, patting it. Harry took a deep breath and downed the rest of his drink before he walked over to the entrance. You chuckled as he did so as you found it amusing that he had to do that to deal with her. 
After you heard her squeal, which meant that Harry had gone up to her already. You started walking towards the entrance door, and you saw them hugging; she then started jumping and kissing him, whispering into his ear and biting her lip as he gave her a smirk. 
As you watched from the sidelines, your heart started to ache. You wished that it was you instead of her. You wished you could whisper all things sweet and dirty into his ear as he looked at you with a smirk before biting his lip. You wanted him to give you the same smile he gave her, although you were starting to see less and less of that smile. You wanted what she had. 
But you would never get that. 
“Hey, you,” Gemma sneaked you from behind you, causing you to slightly jump. “Sorry,” she chuckled. 
“It’s okay. What’s up?” You smiled, trying to hide the pain in your eyes. 
“You’re not going to tell him, huh?” 
“Tell who what?” You raised your eyebrows, pretending to be oblivious. Gemma gave you a knowing look as she raised her eyebrows. 
“You know what. Not gonna tell him at all?” You sighed, shrugging your shoulders as you turned your head back to them. They were posing for some pictures with their arms around each other’s waists. They took a couple: smiling ones, funny ones, and even a kissing one. You turned your head back to Gemma once they started to kiss for a picture, and she softly smiled at you. 
“There’s no point. He’s with Brooke, and it’s not like he’s ever going to like me or get with me,” you sadly explained. Gemma looked at you as if you were totally wrong. “If he’s happy with Brooke, then why would I ruin that for him because of my selfish reasons?” 
“It’s not selfish for wanting to tell someone you love-”
“I don’t love him,” you immediately interrupted. 
“Y/N…c’mon,” she raised her eyebrows, knowing you’re completely wrong. 
“Okay…” you sighed in defeat, and she chuckled, continuing what she was saying. 
“You’ve known him for what, two years? That man makes sure you’re a priority. He makes sure you’re happy. If you could hear the stories he tells us and how he talks about you, you would think otherwise,” she stated before taking a sip of her drink. 
You stay quiet for a moment and think. Was there any way that Harry could have possibly liked you? There’s no way. You hadn’t noticed anything different about his behavior in the past two years you’ve known and worked for him. So, there was no way he could’ve liked you. And you know you’re only telling yourself that now, so you don’t lose your shit at his birthday party. 
“W-What does he say about me?” 
“Maybe you’ll know some time in the future if you tell him,” she challenged, and you rolled your eyes, causing Gemma to laugh. 
After Harry and Brooke managed to get away from the entrance, you and Gemma saw them walking towards you both. 
“Y/N, hi!” She greeted you with a not so surprising high pitched tone; only because Harry is right next to her. She also gave you a hug, which you only put in half the effort like always. Harry smiled at both of you, and she let go. 
“Gems, where’s mum?” He asked his sister. 
“Think she might be in the back,” she replied, looking at Brooke for a brief moment before looking back at Harry. 
“This is Brooke,” he introduced his girlfriend. 
“Hi! It’s so nice to finally meet you,” Brooke said with a big smile on her face, giving Gemma a hug. Polite as Gemma is, she hugged back. 
“You too,” Gemma simply said. 
“Should we go to the back and find mum? Brooke wants to meet her,” Harry asked, and Gemma nodded before walking towards the backyard. 
You stayed back, realizing that you weren’t needed and you didn’t have any business following them for Brooke to meet Anne. So, you walked over to the kitchen to grab a plate of cheese and crackers. Since the kitchen was right next to the large doors that led to the backyard, you looked up and saw Brooke jumping up and down slightly as she greeted Anne with a hug. You saw Anne smiling, hugging her back before they pulled away and started talking. Harry looked at them so fondly as they spoke. 
“Hey,” a voice next to you had startled you, making you slightly jump, taking your attention away from what’s happening in the backyard. Luckily, not dropping any of your food. 
“Hi,” you said back to the man you don’t know. 
“I’m Alex. One of Jeff’s friends. I don’t believe we’ve met yet,” he shook your hand, smiling. 
“I don’t think we have. I’m Y/N,” you nicely said back. 
“So, how do you know Harry?” He asked, grabbing a grape. 
“I’m his assistant, and best friend.” 
“Oh, shit! Special person I’m talking to, right here,” he smirked. Alex was cute and very attractive, but it wasn’t the same kind of smirk that you’ve been in love with for two years. 
“Hardly,” you scoffed before giving him a small smile as a way to tell him you’re somewhat joking. 
“Hey, don’t sell yourself short. By any chance, you want to go somewhere to sit and talk?” He proposed hopefully. It wasn’t a bad idea whatsoever. You needed to make new friends and possibly make some new connections. You also didn’t want to depend on Harry all the time when you wanted to talk to someone because he’s busy, and his girlfriend doesn’t like you. So, you nodded. 
“Yeah, I’d like that.” He smiled, leading you to a more quiet area of the house, which was the sitting area. 
Meanwhile as you were chatting with Alex, Harry watched Brooke interact with Anne with a smile, but he still felt a weird feeling in his chest, like he’s happy about it, but he’s still wary. He brushed that feeling off, looking around and wondering where you were--if you’re having a great time. He turned his head towards the kitchen, and saw you talking to Alex. Smiles were placed on both your faces, and Harry frowned. He knew Alex was charming him up because that’s what he does. Alex technically wasn’t a bad guy, and Harry’s known him for a few years. He was nice, attractive, and can charm the shit out of someone just like Harry. But the sight and thought of seeing him actually charm you did not sit well with him. It really didn’t sit well once he saw you following him out of the kitchen. 
Harry took deep breaths, trying not to let the thought of you possibly enjoying hanging out with Alex as he carried on with his birthday night. 
Tumblr media
6 February 2018
A deep sigh was let out once you sat in your seat on the plane. 
It was cold in Los Angeles and you knew the flight back to New York was going to be a bumpy one considering the weather in both cities, so you dressed comfortably, wearing grey sweatpants, a black sweatshirt, and some white sneakers. Your headphones had been plugged into your ears ever since you were cleared at TSA. 
As you got comfortable in your seat, Harry sat next to you, sighing. You obviously didn’t hear it because your headphones were in, but you definitely heard it the second time when he did it louder. You didn’t do anything, just browse on your phone until he dramatically sighed again, even louder this time. 
“What?” You said, taking your headphones out. 
“Why are you ignoring me?” He immediately asked, and your brows furrowed. 
“Ignoring you? Why would you think that?” 
“Well, for starters, you haven’t really spoken to me since my birthday. What’s up with that?” 
“Well, I didn’t really have to, did I?” There was no reason for your somewhat sarcastic tone and it’s not like you weren’t mad at him or anything, but you were exhausted from flying back and forth, plus doing your job. It’s not like you were ungrateful, but sometimes, you just needed a break, and that included, not talking to anyone. 
“You could’ve just answered my texts saying you were okay and that you weren’t going to be on your phone,” he scoffed, and you knew he was right. You were about to say you were sorry until he muttered something else. “Too busy with Alex, I see.” 
“What?” You asked in disbelief, knowing he said what you heard, but wanted to clarify. 
“You were, right?”
“What does this have to do with Alex?” You were starting to grow frustrated. 
“I mean, I saw you two at my party, and you two left together and stuff. So, you were probably busy for the entire week,” he said casually, scrolling through his phone as if you weren’t fuming right next to him. 
“It was one night-”
“Are you saying you had sex with him?” He turned his head towards you with raised eyebrows. He had this look on his face that told you he knew everything, but he just wanted to hear you say it. So, you did. 
“Yeah. So what if I fucked him? Is there something wrong with that? Didn’t get a little birthday sex? Don’t worry, I had some for you!” You tried containing your yells, but it came out like a loud whisper. Luckily there weren’t that many people on the plane; only the people who flew first class. 
It was true. When Alex had suggested talking, you found out that he was a very nice and funny guy. The night was getting late, and you said you were going to head home (which was a hotel), so he offered to drive you since you took an Uber, and that led to you inviting him up to your room and him gladly saying yes. It all happened so quick. You had immediately kissed him once you closed the door, and that led to him taking both of your clothes off before he fucked you. It was average sex, but you had fun considering that it’s been a while since you’ve had someone fuck you. That morning he left, telling you to text him, but you hadn’t and you don’t know if you will.
Harry stayed quiet, looking back down at his phone, and you shook your head, sitting correctly, and looking out the window, knowing that this was going to be a long flight. 
Just as you knew, the ride was bumpy, raising your fear and anxiety as you held onto yourself for dear life. You turned your music up, put your hands into your sweater, and crossed your arms in a way to calm you down and feel like someone is holding onto you. You closed your eyes, trying to focus on the songs until you felt a hand on your arm. You opened your hands, and saw Harry with his eyes closed, but you knew he wasn’t sleeping. He had always held your hand when you two would fly together and there was turbulence. It was something he did that made you feel safe and comfortable during the flight. 
You smiled softly, taking his hand in with your as you shifted closer to his seat despite the middle console in between you two. For the rest of the flight, you weren’t as scared. 
Once you two landed, Harry’s driver was immediately outside in the designated area, and you two were taken back to your place before there was any cause of commotion at the airport. Harry helped you with your bags, walking to your front door. 
“Hey, I’m sorry for everything on the plane,” he said as you looked for your keys in your purse. 
“It’s okay. I’m sorry too--for not replying to you and for snapping at you on the plane as well,” you said back. “Can I just ask why you were so...angry I was with Alex?” You wondered. 
“I…uh,” he stumbled over his words, trying to find the right thing to say without it coming out like he was a jealous prick. “Just...Alex is known for charming the shit out of you, so he could sleep with you, but seeing as you already slept with him…” 
“Harry, isn’t it my job to decide who I can and can’t sleep with? I get that you want to look out for me, but just let me decide that, alright?” You said softly, and he nodded. 
“Think I was jealous,” he blurted out, and he immediately closed his mouth and widened his eyes once he said that because he really didn’t mean to. 
“W-Why?” You looked at him concerningly, and Harry took a deep breath because now he had make up an answer because god knows what the truth is. 
He took a step forward, looking at you so intently. You felt like he was staring you down, but you didn’t look away as you were so lost in his eyes that it physically made it difficult to even glance the other way.
Next thing you knew, he was inches away from you, glancing down to your lips and back up to your eyes. You held your breath as you looked up at him, looking extra close at the pinkness of his lips. Your chests were pressed so close against one another that you were sure he could feel your heart pounding through his. It was so loud that it rang through your ears—so loud you couldn’t hear anything else except for the constant chanting in your head screaming ’Harry, Harry, Harry.’ It was Harry that you wanted to kiss so badly. It was Harry who’s lips you could touch in an instant if you were to just lift your feet. It was Harry. It always has been. 
But you couldn’t.
Brooke.
You immediately stepped away from him as your eyes looked down, finally away from Harry. “I’m sorry-”
“No, I’m sorry-”
“Because Brooke, and-”
“Yeah…” 
You nodded, not sure what to do next, but seeing as you were still outside of your door, you finally got your keys out, and unlocked it. 
“Well, I’ll see you.” 
“Yeah, I’ll text you,” he said as he started walking backwards away from your apartment. 
You nodded. “Yup. Bye.” He waved, turning around and walking down the hall. 
Walking into your space and bringing your luggage in, you sighed as you closed the door. It was completely silent as your mind was racing and your heart was beating. 
What the fuck just happened and what the fuck was that?
Tumblr media
3 March 2018
The first show of Harry’s tour was kicking off, and you were excited for him. He was slightly nervous and jittery, but that was expected. 
The ‘moment’ you two had when you came back from Los Angeles after your birthday was past you two. Although, you still think about it way too often, Harry seemed like he didn’t want to talk about it, so you respected that and didn’t bring it up. Besides, what was there to talk about anyways?
The first show started in Basel, Switzerland and you were very stoked. You’ve never been to any of the countries he’s going to play in besides London and some cities in the states, so it was going to be an adventure for you. For his very first tour that included small venues, you rarely went to any of the shows, so to say you were excited was an understatement. 
You were with Harry Lambert, looking at the first show suit in the stylist room. It was a Gucci black sparkly suit with gems on the lapel. You hadn’t seen this particular suit on him yet because you weren’t at the fitting the day he tried it on, but you absolutely loved it. It gave everyone just a hint of what the rest of the suits for the tour will look like. 
“Har—oh,” Brooke had entered the room, assumingly looking for Harry, but was disappointed when she saw you. “Have you seen Harry?” 
“Uh, I haven’t. He might be out on the stage,” you said honestly, and she nodded, turning around. But before she could exit the room, you called her, “Hey, Brooke.” She turned around, rolling her eyes. “I just kind of want to mend things between us. I feel like there has always been some sort of tension ever since we met, and seeing that you’ve been around for long and might be around for even longer, we should be civil towards one another.” 
“Well, obviously there has been. You’re trying to steal my boyfriend,” she said straightforwardly, and you raised your eyebrows, looking at Lambert. He was looking at Brooke with a not so friendly look, knowing that you would never do that despite knowing that you were in love with him. “I’ve said it once, and I’ll say it again. You will never get Harry. He’s in love with me, not you. Don’t think I don’t know what you’re trying to do. You will never be enough for him because you’re just his assistant. That’s all you are to him. Don’t think you’re more than that, okay?” She said with a smile, and you bit your lip, not wanting to argue with her. 
There was something about her words that really got to you, and you think that’s because she’s actually dating Harry and has managed to weave her way into his heart.
“I’d hate to continuingly have to tell you this, but I think the first time was enough, right? Now you’ve made me tell you twice,” she continued as she scoffed. “Anyways, I need to go find my boyfriend,” she turned around but suddenly stumbled back as she was met with Harry. “Oh, Harry. I was just looking-”
“Don’t even speak right now,” his eyes were dark and he was angry. 
It wasn’t like you to see Harry so often considering that he sometimes deals with rude fans and pushy paps, but he was mad. 
“I-”
“Are you fucking kidding me right now? Trying to degrade my best friend and assistant?” 
“Har-”
“We need to talk,” he told her, leaving the room. She turned around to look at you with sad eyes, but you simply couldn’t help her, not like you would anyways. She followed him, and the room was left with a weird tension that needed to be cut with a knife.
“Well, wasn’t that interesting,” Lambert said. 
After about thirty minutes, Harry walked back into the room. He stayed complete silent and started undressing to get into his suit since there was thirty minutes left until he had to go on. You and Lambert looked at each other, not knowing if you two should say anything, but decided to keep your mouths shut and let him get ready. 
Once he was dressed, he thanked Lambert and walked out of the room; once again with the same tension being in the air. You walked out as well as you debated whether or not to talk to him, but you saw him and the band gathering together, so you figured you could just talk to him after. 
The show had finally started, and the band was going out on stage. The crowd was roaring like crazy as the anticipation of seeing Harry was finally coming to an end. Once the band was fully equipped, Harry started to climb up the stairs. Around the stage it was dark as the beginning of ‘Only Angel’ started to play. You turned on your flashlight on your phone, and called out for him.
“Harry!” He turned around, holding the railings of the stairs, and his expression was normal; no smile or anything.  “Goodluck out there!” Once you had said that, the corners of his lips turned up as his mouth turned into a soft smirk. 
“Thanks, angel,” he said before pointing up as a way to say ‘listen to the song.’ “This is for you,” he quickly told you, running up the stairs and to the stage before the big circular screen rose up. 
You watched the rest of the show from the side of the stage, not too far away from the front of the pit. He was spectacular on stage; he truly belonged there. He charmed the crowd, made them laugh, scream, cry, and dance their hearts out for an hour and a half, and you were truly amazed. The atmosphere of the venue was insane, loving every second of it. 
Once he finished with ‘Kiwi,’ he said his goodnights to Switzerland before running off the stage and meeting the band, talking about how crazy and fun the first show was. He told everyone that it’s only going to get better from here, and everyone nodded and high fived excitedly. 
After a few minutes, Harry walked to his dressing room to cool off, and you followed behind him. It may seem as clingy, but you were concerned for your best friend. A lot went down with Brooke in just a few minutes, and you wanted to know if he was okay, despite not showing any signs of sadness or anger on stage. 
You knocked on his dressing room door and opened it before you heard ‘come in.’ Harry looked up, and saw you peek your head through the door, and he gestured you to come in all the way, which you did. 
“That was an amazing show, H,” you complimented. 
“You watched?” He asked surprisingly. 
“Yeah, didn’t miss a moment. I was on the side of the stage.” 
“Oh, well. Thank you,” he said. 
There was a moment of silence as you tried to form your words on how to go about talking to him about what had happened before the show. 
“I-I just wanted to ask if you were okay?” You started. He took a seat on his couch as you stayed standing up in front of him. “I’m sorry for what happened before the-”
“Why are you saying sorry?” He asked, looking up at you as if he was genuinely asking. 
“I...I don’t know what happened with Brooke, but if something did happen then I’m sorry,” you nervously. The only reason why you were so nervous was because you hoped that he didn’t get mad at you for whatever happened with her. 
“You didn’t do anything, angel. You did nothing wrong at all,” he sighed, and you stayed quiet as there was definitely more of what he wanted to say. “But I did break up with her.” Your brows raised at that, and you fought the urge to jump and cheer. 
“Y-You did?” 
“Yeah. I kind of wanted to a few weeks ago, but I never got the chance to. But before the show, she gave me another perfectly good reason why we shouldn’t be together, so I ended it.” There wasn’t a hint of sadness on his face as he told you. 
“What were the other reasons?” You hadn’t known that he wanted to break up with her before the events that happened today. You would expect him to talk to you about it, but you weren’t hurt by it. 
“I…” he cut himself off, and you waited patiently to see if he was going to say something. After a few more seconds, you saw him debate with himself to see if he actually wanted to tell you, and you wondered if he trusted in that sense; to talk to you and tell you things that were on his mind, but you didn’t want to get into it with him. 
“Are you okay?” You asked instead, truly wanting to make sure. 
“I should be asking you that.” 
“No-”
“Angel, c’mon. Behind closed doors, I didn’t know half the shit she was saying to you. I told her to fess up everything she’s done to you, and she did. Let me tell you, I was not happy at all that you had to deal with that without me knowing. And that fact that she lied to me about asking you to hang out and pretending to be nice to you--no wonder why you didn’t want to hang out with her.” 
The first time you had hung out with her was when you had to pick up some lunch and dry clean for Harry. They had only been dating for two months, so you thought it was best to get to know her since you were Harry’s best friend. You asked if Brooke wanted to go, and she hesitantly said sure, but when Harry thought that was a great idea, she perked up to it and said yes. When you two were in line for lunch she had asked you the basics of your job before rudely interrupting you and telling you that she knew that you were in love with him. Before you could even deny, she wasn’t having it and told you that you weren’t good enough for him and that you were only hired because you were Glenne’s friend. You were quite devastated after that and you faced Harry everyday with a smile on your face, but with the lingering thought of her words in the back of your mind. 
“Yeah, she wasn’t my particular number one person to hang out with,” you said sadly, and Harry sighed, standing up. He walked closer to you, and it felt like that time when you got home from the airport, and placed his hands on your shoulders. 
“Her talking shit about you was the last straw. Can’t have anyone talk to you like that, ever,” he said while looking into your eyes as if he was trying to convince you. 
“I am really sorry that you had to go through a break up though--especially on your first night of tour. Plus, it was your first serious relationship you’ve had in a while,” you felt bad because no one should go through the pain of a breakup. 
“It’s alright. Wasn’t in love with her like she said--didn’t even say those words to her. And it was her idea of wanting to meet my family. I was still wary about it, but that was one of the subjects for most of our arguments,” he sighed. “But I’m gonna be much happier without her. Felt like I was always stressed out around her,” he chuckled, causing you to as well. “But if anyone that I know talks to you like that ever again, please don’t hide that from me. I hate knowing that you were taking all of that shit, especially for months.” You nodded your head and he gave you a smile. 
He pulled you in for a hug and you wrapped your arms around his waist, resting your head on his chest. You two stayed like that for a moment as you both felt like it’s been a while since you two has had one of these hugs. All thoughts and worries flew out of your head--not thinking about when the next time you’ll have one of these types of hugs again, and you felt safe in his arms. 
And you cherished it. 
Tumblr media
30 March 2018
Tour was going by rather quickly as the first ten shows were already done with. 
You were able to see some beautiful sightings of the countries with Lambert and some of the band, and throughout that time, you had wished Harry was with you all, but for obvious reasons, he couldn’t be out in public so casually. 
Everything you’ve seen was so beautiful and your jaw dropped everytime you would look at a tall and high building, or the skyline of the entire city. You were quite amazed. 
Now, everyone was in Barcelona, and it was by far one of your favorite cities that you’ve visited. You loved the atmosphere and the ambiance that walking through the streets of Spain had placed a beaming grin onto your face. You were only staying for a couple of days before everyone had to pack up and head to Madrid, but you made sure to snap a mental and physical photo to remember your time in Spain. 
But rather than spending your day on the streets, roaming around the beautiful city, you were currently looking for Harry because Lambert was also looking for him, and of course, you decided to help find him. You pretty much checked every room backstage besides the bathroom, and you didn’t really think to check the restroom, but he might be in there, so you made your way towards it. 
“Oh! Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to barge in,” you said once you entered the restroom. 
The sight before you had made you sweat. A series of butterflies made its appearance in your stomach, making your hands shake. The slightest bit of air from swinging the door open had made chills rise onto your skin, but you knew that it was because of the beautiful man in front of you. 
You had walked in on Helene taking pictures of Harry, possibly so he could post them on Instagram. But he was candidly looking into the mirror as he sprayed on his Tom Ford Tobacco Vanille cologne; the one that you had picked up for him multiple times, and the one that you think smells amazing, specifically on him. He strutted around like it was made for him, and it was honestly your favorite scent. His suit was a custom Palomo black and white checkered sequined suit that just looked fucking good on him. 
“No worries, sweetheart. Just about finished. He’s all yours,” she winked at you before heading out of the bathroom. 
“What’s up, angel?” 
“Just wanted to tell you that Lambert is looking for you. Said he needed to fix up a stitch really quick before you go on stage,” you said, not meeting his eyes. 
“Is that all?” He asked, sensing your nerves, and he knew that it was possibly from walking in on him, doing a mini photoshoot because he knew he looked good. 
You gulped, “Y-Yeah.”
“You don’t sound too sure,” he challenged, walking closer to you, but not too close as there was a bit of space between you two. 
“Uh-”
“Tell me,” he shifted even closer, making you nervous. You didn’t know where the sudden outbreak of him being somewhat flirtatious as he demanded you to tell him came from, but the sound of his raspy and deep voice, and the way he was looking was making you act up as you were about to confess your feelings towards him. 
You figured it was time as you felt like he sensed that kind of vibe from you, plus Brooke mentioning that you were in love with him, which you think you’re pretty sure he heard, but you’re wondering why he hasn’t 
“I-I want to tell you something, and this may potentially ruin things between us, but-”
“There you are!” The sound of someone else’s voice in the room and the banging of the room had interrupted you, and you and Harry stepped back from one another. “Everything okay here?” Lambert asked, looking at both of you and practically feeling the tension. Once you two nodded, not looking at each other, he looked at you both suspiciously before continuing. “Anyways, come with me. I need to fix something,” Lambert walked out of the restroom as Harry followed him, not giving you another look. 
You turned around to look in the mirror, sighing to yourself as you shook your head. 
Well, guess that’s not happening right now, you thought. 
Watching Harry up on stage was something you would never get used to. You made sure to never miss a show as you watched from the side, and since he knows where you stand during the show, he always makes sure to go to that side of the stage and wave to you. But seeing him on stage was different every night. His performances and conversations with the crowd were always different and that’s what made them and him so entertaining. 
Once the show was over, he made his way off the stage and to the dressing room. He talked a bit with the band, as they always did right when the show ends, to talk about their favorite moments and which songs they needed to work on for rehearsals. After that, Harry walked to his dressing room and you would follow every single time. 
“Another great show, H. Never get tired of watching you,” you said once you entered the dressing room.
“Thanks, angel. Always feel like I’m on a high when I’m trying to cool down, like I just have so much energy to perform another hour,” he chuckled, wiping some sweat off his forehead. 
“That must be exhilarating--being up there every night for your fans,” you walked towards him to stand in front of him as he leaned on the table of the vanity. 
“Yeah, it really is,” he smiled. He pulled your arm towards him and wrapped his arms around your waist, giving you a hug. You were surprised by the sudden affection, but Harry was an affectionate type of guy, and really, you didn’t mind being close to him. Plus, he seemed extra needy since he recently just broke up with someone. “Thank you for being here.”
“Of course, Harry. Always going to be here for you,” you said against his ear as your arms were around his shoulders. 
“And I’m always going to be here for you,” he said back. 
For a moment, it was just this--hugging him as he cooled down in your arms, and you liked it...a lot. But when you pulled back, you didn’t pull back completely and it made you face to face with him, literally inches away from each other. You two looked at each other in the eye, glancing your eyes to his lips and back up to his eyes. The only thing you thought was: I really want to fucking kiss him right now. 
And it seemed like he did as well because he crashed his lips with yours, molding them together as your arms were wrapped around one another. It was everything you expected as you dreamed of his lips on yours quite often, and you absolutely loved it. He felt like a drug, like all of your pain and worries went away once his lips touched yours, and you were addicted. You wanted so much more. 
Your tongue makes its way in his mouth, meeting his, and he swirled it with his before lightly sucking on it. Your teeth found a way to bite his bottom lip and he let out a groan. He pulled back for a bit, looking at you before kissing you again. 
“God, been wanting you for so long,” he groaned, and you felt butterflies in your stomach, trying not to take his words literally as to keeping your hopes down. But little did you know that his words were serious. “Can I touch you?” He whispered in between kisses. 
You nodded, whispering out, “Please.” Harry’s stomach did flips once you gave him consent, and his hands trailed down your body. Luckily, you were wearing a simple dress with straps, so it was easier. He bunched up your dress up to your hips, and you held it up with your arm before touching you over your panties, feeling a wet spot over the fabric. 
“Practically drenched. It’s for me, right?” He muttered, wrapping his free arm around your waist so you were closer. 
“Yes. Always going to be for you,” you moaned as his hand continuously rubbed you and he smirked. Your words had completely slipped out, but it was the truth. 
“Can I take them off?” He asked, and you nodded your head before he slid your drench underwear down your legs and you kicked them off to the side somewhere in his dressing room. You molded your lips with his again and grabbed a fistful of his curly hair, causing him to kiss you even harder. 
Harry then started roaming his hands around your thighs, going to ass and squeezing the flesh, and you moan against his mouth. His hand moves up and to your stomach before trailing down to your hot core. He took his fingers and swiped up your slit, making you groan from the feeling of his hands. 
“Fuck, you’re so wet,” he whispered before touching your clit and rubbing it. He buried his face in your neck to kiss, suck, and nibble on your skin, and that feeling made you throw your head back as his hands rubbed you and mouth kissed you. The feeling was indescribable, but it was Harry. 
You felt his fingers slip inside of you, starting off with one finger before pumping in and out of you. He then added another finger as he curled them in an inward motion and brushed his fingertips against the soft upper area of your pussy. 
“Shit, that feels so good. So, so good, H,” you groaned out. Harry took the straps of your dress off your shoulders, and kissed your chest where the gold chain he had gifted you rested. He pulled on the front of your dress to expose your tits, and his mouth immediately wrapped around your hard nipples, sucking them and pulling on them before releasing them with a pop. Your grip on Harry’s hair tightened as you felt like you were going to rip out his hair from the way you’re feeling. “Add another,” you whimpered out. 
“Another finger?” He looked at you with wide eyes, but all he saw was your eyes closed and head being thrown back; and you nodded. He added his pinky finger in with his ring and middle finger, trying his best to curl them up into you, but the snugness of your hole was challenging him. “Fuck, you’re so tight. Practically squeezing my fingers,” he said, kissing your neck. 
His words and fingers had gotten you to the edge, and you were minutes away from releasing around him. He saw you bite your lip and take deep breaths, and he knew you were close. 
“C’mon, angel baby. Let go for me, yeah? Know you’re close,” he thrusted his fingers deep into you, and that was when you hit your peak. With loud moans, you jolted around his fingers, riding your high out as Harry continuously pressed kisses to your chest and neck. He took his hand, sticking one of his fingers in your mouth, and you swirled your tongue around his finger that was covered in your orgasm, and moaned. He took the other two fingers, and placed them in his own mouth, tasting yourself on his fingers. “Taste so good,” he smirked, kissing your forehead, and you leaned your head on his shoulders to take a breather.
Once you calmed down, you turned your head to kiss his neck, sucking on his skin to calm your breathing down, and Harry hissed. His hands ran through your hair and all the way down to your back, soothing you. After a minute or two, you lifted your head up, meeting his eye before you kissed him, deeply. You two made out for a while you unbuttoned his black shirt, and you pulled away from his lips to kiss down his torso until you were on your knees. Harry was hard as rock in his pants and desperately needed some release that he could possibly come any minute with how you’re kissing him. 
His entire suit was still on and he went to take his jacket off, but you stopped him. 
“Keep it on,” you looked up at him as you told him so before proceeding to kiss down his stomach. He put his arms down, and gripped and sat on the edge of the desk. You got to the hem of his pants and looked up at him, giving him a sight to die for. “Can I take these off?” 
He looked down at you, smirking before nodding his head. “Please, take it all off,” he gave your cheek a stroke with his thumb, and you smiled looking back down to his pants to unbutton it, pulling down his trousers to his ankles, you saw his bulge, and smirked before you kissed over his underwear. Harry took a deep breath in as you palmed him before grabbing the hem of his briefs and pulling it down, his dick springing up as Harry’s shoulder relaxed from the lack of restraint. 
“Fuck, you’re so big,” you said, grabbing his dick. You knew very well that he was well endowed because of the many times you’ve seen him get hard on stage, and also from that moment when you walked in on him in Brooke’s mouth had confirmed it, but seeing it up close was unreal. You licked your hand and grabbed his cock before looking up at him. “What do you want me to do, Harry?” Your voice asked seductively. He was completely under your spell as his breaths were staggered while you stroked him. 
“Anything you want,” he breathed out. You smirked at the state he was in at the moment, and you loved every second of it. 
You put your mouth around his tip, sucking it lightly, and that caused Harry’s breath to hitch in his throat. You took more of him in your mouth as you relaxed your jaw. He was bigger than the guys you’ve fucked and you really hoped you were doing a good job for him because you wanted him to feel good. You hollowed your cheeks in and sucked hard, slicking your tongue on the underside of his cock. 
“Feels so good, angel baby,” he moaned, throwing his head back. He was already embarrassingly close, but he wanted to feel you more, so he tangled his fingers in your hair, getting a gentle but steady grip, and started guiding your head up and down his cock. You let him take control for the time being because honestly, you loved hearing the sounds of his moans start to progress. “That’s it,” he muttered under his breath once he felt the back of your throat. 
You placed your hands on his thighs, gripping his skin harshly so that your nails dug into it, and he hissed, but the pain felt so good to him. After a few more pushes to your head, you pushed on his thighs so he could release you, and when you did that he knew that he was done being in control. You grabbed his cock that was slick from your mouth, and you loved your head down so you could take his balls in your mouth. More of the beautiful sounds coming from his mouth came out more loudly as you sucked until he finally said the words. 
“Gonna cum, angel. Gonna fuckin’ cum,” he moaned. You saw his knuckles practically turn white as he gripped the desk hard. You loved your head back up to place the tip in your mouth as you fondled with his balls before he spurts his come in your mouth. “Such a fuckin’ good girl,” he said as you swallowed. 
You kissed back up his stomach and to his neck before meeting his lips again. He tasted himself on your tongue, and you were a good mix with him. You two pulled back from one another, looking at each other before you both started giggling—post orgasm haze. 
“Jeez, such an angel, but that mouth of yours is sinful.”
Tumblr media
5 June 2018 
The rest of the Europe, Australia, and Asia leg went by, and you were back in the states for the first show of the US leg. 
Ever since the dressing room escapade, you and Harry had been acting differently towards each other. There weren’t anymore sexual acts, but there was a lot more affection. Sadly, not any kisses to the lips, but kisses to the cheek and forehead were made, and they were welcomed and given. He would always put an arm around your shoulder when you two were walking, and there was the occasional cuddle in his hotel room before or after the show. It was definitely different, but you enjoyed it. 
What you didn’t enjoy was the fact that you hadn’t told him you liked him. You were sure he had an idea, but you wanted to say it out loud to get it off your chest. You also didn’t know if he felt that way towards you whatsoever, and that thought scared you. Just because of what happened in the dressing room didn’t necessarily mean he had feelings for you. The thought of him just leading you on and messing with you feelings made your heart sink when you think about it, and you really hoped it wouldn't get to that point. 
Tonight was the Dallas show, and Harry wore an Alexander McQueen embroidered pink floral suit. As always, he looked amazing. But your favorite was the Barcelona suit, and you might be a bit biased on that given the events that happened in that particular suit. You chuckled to yourself as you followed Jeff and Glenne to your seats. 
You decided to watch the show with them in the reserved seats in the lower level of the arena, and it was a change from the side of the stage, but you could really see more from the seats. Once you got to your seats, Harry had already finished up with ‘Only Angel’ and was moving on to ‘Woman,’ but a familiar man had caught your eye. 
“Alex?” You called out through the music. 
“Y/N! It’s so great seeing you!” He said, giving you a hug. 
“What are you doing here?” 
“Jeff and Harry invited me! Haven’t seen Harry perform since last year, so they reserved me a seat,” his face was close to your ear, so you could understand him better through the loudness of the crowd and the bass of the music. 
“Ah, well I’m glad you’re here! It’s been a while,” you said completely innocently, and he nodded, smiling before turning his head to watch Harry on stage. In all honesty, the thought of Alex slipped your mind because your head was constantly thinking about Harry as it always does. 
For the rest of the show, he was amazing. The crowd was wild as always, and he absolutely looked so cute in his suit. Your favorite part was when someone threw a rainbow sequined cowboy hot on stage, and he picked it up to wear it. It was a look, to be honest. 
Before the band said their goodbyes to the crowd, the four of you headed backstage, so there wasn’t any delay with everyone trying to leave at the same time. As you were walking, you were walking next to Alex as Jeff and Glenne walked in front of you two. 
“Hey, I was thinking. Maybe we should get dinner tonight? Y’know, to catch up? I know some places that are still open,” he suggested, and you liked the idea. 
“Yeah, sure. Sounds good,” you said, smiling back. 
The four of you met with the band as they laughed and talked about the show. You met Harry, giving him a hug as you told him that he did amazing out there. He hugged you back tightly, telling you thank you. 
“C’mon,” he said, taking your hand as he wanted to go to his dressing room as you always did after his shows. 
“Oh, uh, actually,” you pulled your hand back, causing him to stop walking. “I’m going out to dinner with Alex…” you said nervously, and he raised his eyebrows, looking down the hall and noticing Alex talking to Adam. 
“Oh okay, yeah. Go ahead,” he let go of your hand, completely dropping it from his as his face dropped. In that moment, you wished you didn’t say yes to Alex and went with Harry to his dressing room. This would be the first time you were going to miss out on dressing room chats as he calmed down from his energetic state from being on stage. It would be the first time you weren’t going back to the hotel with him while holding his hand in the car and up to your rooms. 
“Hey,” Alex caught up to you, not feeling the tension between you and Harry. “Ready to go?” You looked up at him briefly, placing a fake smile on your face before looking back at Harry who already had his back turned towards you, walking to his room. 
“Yeah, I am.” 
Tumblr media
21 June 2018
The prospect of not talking to Harry as much hurt you a bit. 
You haven’t had a full conversation with him in about two weeks. The most you’ve ever spoken to him was when someone was looking for him or if he was clearing up and clarifying his schedule. But other than that, nothing. You didn’t know why it was like that, but you tried not to let it get to you as you told yourself that he was tired from the tour. He was on the last month of tour and the flying had definitely caught up to him. 
But that wasn’t the real reason. 
You have been going out with Alex ever since that night in Dallas, and you thought it was nice to have someone to talk to other than Harry and the rest of the crew and band--although they’re very nice and fun people, you saw them everyday. And you came to find out that Alex was even more fun once you’ve gotten to know him even more. 
Alex made you feel free. There was something refreshing about hanging out with him that made you want more, and he definitely took your mind off of thinking about Harry... by having his tongue down your throat and inside of you. There have been plenty of pleasurable times when Alex had made you feel good, and vice versa. It started out in the night at Fort Lauderdale, two days after Dallas, and you went out with Alex to a bar in the city. Both of you had too much to drink and he asked if you wanted to go over to his hotel, which of course you said yes. One thing led to another, and you were underneath him, moaning his name out. Ever since then, he would watch every other show and you two would have date nights that took the night away into a hotel room. 
It was nice, and he liked you and you liked him back. 
Liked him as much as Harry? Not quite. But there were definitely a little bit of feelings for him. Besides, he calls you nice things and tells you you’re pretty. 
It was Harry’s first New York show in Madison Square Garden as a solo artist, and he was pumped, but also a little nervous. You were so incredibly proud of him and what he’s done in his career, so you were happy for him. And you were happy to be back home for a few days as well because you haven’t been home since the beginning of the month. 
Alex stood next to you with an arm around your shoulder the entire time of Harry’s show. He was wearing a custom Gucci white suit with flowers printed all over and the phrase ‘Memento Mori’ underneath it. The lapel part of the suit was a velvet material and he wore a black shirt underneath. The trousers were flared from the knee down, and you absolutely loved it. 
When the show was over, you and Alex headed backstage to meet with the band. You had expected that he wanted to get dinner already, but he hadn’t mentioned anything, so you assumed that you were going to go back to your hotel and hang out with him there. 
“Lovely show, H,” you hugged him tightly, but he didn’t reciprocate the same energy into the hug like you, and you found that odd because he usually hugs you tight. 
“Thanks,” he smiled softly, shaking Alex’s hand before thanking him for coming to the show. 
You turned towards Alex and asked, “What’s the plan for tonight?” 
“Oh, I was going to tell you, but I’m hanging out with a couple of friends from college that live here. So, I can't hang out with you tonight. I’m sorry,” he slightly pouted. “I’ve got to get going now though, so I’ll see you tomorrow?” You nodded understandingly. 
“Yeah, definitely. Probably best we don’t hang out all the time because I don’t want you to get tired of me,” you joked, and he shook his head no. “But I’ll see you tomorrow. Text me,” you told him before he gave you a kiss on the lips before heading towards the exit. 
Harry had watched the whole interaction with a small frown. He tried to contain his jealousy when he saw Alex kiss you and you smiling, but it was difficult for him to not scoff loudly, so he turned around and walked towards his dressing room. You turned around to find Harry missing, and you assumed he went to his dressing room, so you headed over there. You knocked on the door before entering, and you found him on the couch with his phone in his hands. 
“Hey,” you smiled, sitting on the couch as he muttered a ‘hi.’ “Are you okay?” 
“Yeah, what makes you think I’m not?” He said defensively, and you furrowed your brows. 
“I never said you weren’t. I just wanted to make sure you were. I haven’t talked to you in a while.” 
“Well, that’s not my fault,” he whispered under his breath before continuing to scroll through his phone. 
There was a bit of a silence, and unfortunately, it was an awkward one. You didn’t feel needed in the dressing room, but you sat there awkwardly as you didn’t know what to say to him. 
“You’re seeing Alex?” He suddenly asked, breaking the silence. 
“Yeah. Just hanging out with him,” you got up to grab a water bottle from the table, and you opened it, taking a sip. 
“So, you’re fucking him?” He said casually, but you choked on your water, immediately coughing. Once you calmed down, you looked at him with watered eyes. 
“Uh…” 
“You can tell me,” he said sternly. 
“I mean, yeah, we had sex a few times, but there’s no label or anything like that. We’re just hanging out,” you told him, and he nodded. 
“Do you like him?” He raised his brows, and you took a deep breath, wondering what all these questions were for. 
“I think so, but-”
“Good, he’s a good guy,” he interrupted you. You liked Alex, yeah, but comparing your feelings for Alex to Harry...unmatchable. “I’m glad you’re happy,” he said, getting up from the couch before grabbing a towel from the vanity and walking out of the dressing room. Once he left, you were alone in the dressing room. You sighed deeply as you buried your face in your hands. 
“Yeah, sure I am.”
Tumblr media
22 June 2018
The sound of ringing had woken you up from your slumber. 
You groaned as you tried to make out where your phone might be on your bedside table with your eyes closed, but you were hitting empty spots, so you opened one eye and grabbed your phone. 
“Hello?” Your morning voice coming out through the speaker. 
“Y/N. Can you come by, like right now?” It was Harry on the phone, and you groaned. After the night prior, you thought he didn’t want to talk to you, but seeing as you’re still his assistant, of course he would call you. 
“Why must you call me at,” you pulled your phone back to look at the time, “six in the morning?” 
“Please. It’s important. I have some stuff I need you to do,” he pleaded, and you stretched your limbs out, making inhumane noises while still being on the phone, and Harry chuckled. 
“Fine. Be there in like twenty.”
“Thank you, angel! See you.”
He must be in an awfully good mood this morning, you thought. And it’s been a while since you heard your pet name, but you brushed it off and got ready. 
You unlocked the door of Harry’s house, letting yourself in. You found him sitting on the couch, reading a book until he looked up at the door and saw you. He got up and walked towards you, and opened his arms, giving you a big hug. 
“Hey, angel. Thanks for coming by,” he said into your ear, leaving you in goosebumps. 
“Course. Everything okay?” You asked once you pulled away. 
“Yeah. I miss you, y’know. Feel like we haven’t spoken in a while,” he trailed off a bit, and you squint your eyes at him. 
“I sense a ‘but,’” you said, and he chuckled. 
“I actually need you to get these for me, if that’s okay? Just need them before the show,” he handed you a list, and you looked at it. 
The items were something similar as before: a bouquet of flowers and a gift basket with various types of snacks. As you read through it, that’s when you knew and your heart sank. 
“So who is it?” Harry looked at you curiously, and you waved around the list up. “Who are you dating?” 
“Oh, this girl I met through a mutual friend. She actually was at the Dallas show and we met after at a bar. She’s in the fashion industry; her name is Rena,” he explained with a smile. “She’s coming to the show tonight, so I just wanted to get her a little something.” 
“Okay, I’m on it. I’ll see you tonight,” you headed out, figuring since you had nothing else to do, you could stretch your errands out until the show. You decided to have breakfast first and get some coffee since it was quite early still, and enjoy a day to yourself until Harry introduces you to yet another girl. 
Rena was a nice lady. She was two years older than you and Harry, and she was drop dead gorgeous. You’ve never seen anyone this stunning up close. She always had the sweetest smile, and you were contemplating if she was real or not, and why Harry is calling you ‘angel’ and not her. It was difficult to hate her, and it’s not like you wanted to, but considering that you have feelings for Harry, you wanted something to be wrong about her--maybe a Brooke 2.0, but she was so kind to you, and she loved everything that was gifted to her from Harry, even if the items were the smallest things. So, there were no complaints. 
Harry seemed happy with her, so that’s all that mattered. 
Tumblr media
1 July 2018
It seemed like Rena was around all the time now, like she was at every show since night two in New York. You tried to busy yourself by going around the town you were in or talking to Alex, but you missed Harry. It was always like this when he was dating someone; the first few months, he would completely forget about you and always hang out with the person, but once he starts settling in, he wants to talk to you. And since he’s only been dating Rena for a month, he hasn’t been talking to you lately. 
You watched Harry on stage in St. Paul next to Rena, Alex, and Jeff as Harry was wearing a sparkly pink Gucci shirt with a pussybow on the front and some black trousers. The energy in the room was amazing. By far it was the best performance of ‘Medicine’ you’ve seen him perform. He even held out a pair of handcuffs in front of the crowd, making them go crazy, and he looked up at your section, glancing at Rena before smirking, making you cringe a tad bit as she cheered. 
At the end of the show, you greeted the band, and immediately Rena was attached to Harry, which made you impatient because you wanted to hug him like you always do. But they were wrapped in each other’s arms as they kissed, no plans of letting go of one another. 
“Hey, wanna head out?” Alex asked. You still hadn’t said hello to Harry, but you figured you could text him later, so you nodded, glancing back at the two of them and walked out with Alex. He took you to a diner that wasn’t too far from the hotel and you both ate breakfast for a midnight meal because breakfast simply hits differently when it’s at an unusual hour. Alex then walked you back to the hotel room, and you were exhausted by this point. You just wanted to get out of your shoes and sleep for a very long time. You were lucky that you weren’t sharing a room with Alex because sometimes you just needed to be alone, and this moment was that time. “So, I’ve been meaning to ask you something,” he said, stopping in front of your room and your brows raised as he continued. “We’ve been dating for about a month now, and I really like you, so I wanted to ask if you wanted to be my girlfriend.”
You had expected anything else, but that question. Your heart beat practically stopped for a moment as you looked at him, wondering if he was serious, and when he didn’t say he was joking, you realized that he was actually being serious. 
“Oh, uhm…”
“It’s been fun getting to know you and travelling to these places with you, so I figured it was time to ask you.”
“Alex...you’re a really nice guy, but I’m just not sure I can be your girlfriend,” you told him honestly, and his brows furrowed. 
“Why’s that?”
“I-I like you, but I feel like my feelings for you aren’t 100% there when it comes to being your girlfriend.” He only nodded, and you were getting quite anxious when he didn’t say anything. 
He then started laughing, pacing around in the hallway and you crossed your arms. 
“That’s hilarious,” he said. 
“What-”
“No, the only reason you don’t want to be with me is because you’re in love with someone else!” His voice raised, making the hallway echo a bit. You looked at him, not knowing what to say. “Yeah. I know you’re in love with Harry. Noticed that the first time I met you; that you were staring right at someone that wasn’t yours, but desperately wanted to be.”
“I…” you were speechless. Had you really been that obvious about your feelings towards Harry that everyone around you noticed? 
“It’s a shame though, isn’t it?” He had a grin of the devil; mischievously and humiliating. You looked at him nervously, urging him to continue. “You’re in love with someone that doesn’t even want you,” he stated. “That doesn’t look your way for a second when he thinks about a relationship because you’re only his assistant. Not once would he look your way down the street if you weren’t working for him,” he looked you up and down, and your eyes started watering, and you were embarrassed that you were about to cry in front of Alex as he crushed you in every possible way. “It’s okay, don’t cry. You have me,” he opened his arms to take you in for a hug, but you physically pushed him away because now you were angry. 
“I have you? Are you fucking kidding me? After you just humiliated me?” You were breathing out through your nose as your tears made their way down your cheeks. 
“Hey, I’m just telling you the truth-”
“Why did you even ask me to be your girlfriend?” You asked, genuinely confused on his logic. 
“Well, the question that you’re supposed to be asking is why did I talk to you in the first place?” 
“Why did you?” 
“Since you want to know so bad,” he teased, and you rolled your eyes. “When I saw you, I definitely liked you, but then I saw you were giving heart eyes to Harry, so I thought I could change your mind. See if I could switch your feelings up,” he chuckled. 
“So, this was some sort of experiment? Guessing your hypothesis was wrong then, huh? Go ahead and write your conclusion as: fucked her, but dick wasn’t good enough to fall in love. So, fuck off,” you rolled your eyes and opened the door before slamming it shut in his face. Your back was leaning against the door as more that you’ve been holding onto fell from your face as you heard him still talk. 
“You’ll never be like Brooke or Rena, or whoever he dates in the future! You’re nothing to him!” He yelled through the door as his words came out muffled. 
Sliding down the door, you finally heard him leave, and you were full on sobbing. You tried not to let his words get the better of you, but the way Alex spat them out so easily, it was hard not to. 
Because what if he’s right. 
Tumblr media
7 July 2018
Harry noticed that you had been feeling off the entire week. 
It was like you were simply existing, but not present in some moments when people would talk to you. You had this dull look on your face, and it wasn’t the same as your bright and happy look that he looked forward to everyday. He noticed it when everyone was leaving from Minnesota, and he told himself that it was because you were tired, which was true, but he didn’t know the whole reason. 
After the show in Seattle, he didn’t see you like he used to, and he wondered where you or if you even watched the show. Once he high fived and talked to everyone for a bit, he headed to his dressing room, hoping that you were in there, but you weren’t. So now, he was worried. 
H: Hey, where are you? He texted. Luckily, Rena wasn’t around anymore because she would want all his attention after the show. He simply couldn’t take someone being so clingy, so he called things off with her. It may have also had to do with the fact that he didn’t want to hide his feelings anymore, and being with other people just wasn’t working for him anymore. Not when you were in front of him. 
It’s been a long time coming now, and he felt stupid for not telling you in the first place since he’s been in love with you since last year--during the time he was with Brooke. He was honestly afraid to tell you, and when he heard Brooke say it, he just felt so much shock run through him, so he kept his mouth shut. He didn’t have an excuse as to why he got with other people while being in love with you, but it just made him feel in control of himself because he couldn’t control his feelings towards you, so he got scared. So, he decided that when everyone gets to California in two days, he’s going to confess his entire feelings for you. 
Harry walked to your hotel room, knocking on it as he waited for you to answer. He could hear shuffling and movement through the door, and he hoped to god that Alex wasn’t in there with you. 
“Who is it?” You said through the door, softly. 
“Angel, it’s Harry. Can I see you?” He asked. There was a pause, but then he heard the door handle rattled as you opened the door. 
Your face was a crying mess and your hair was up in a very messy bun. Harry’s mouth opened slightly as he concerningly asked, “What’s wrong? Are you okay?” His question and concern had made you sob even more as you shook your head. “C’mere,” he pulled you in for a hug and you sobbed into his chest as he walked you over to the edge of your bed. He observed your room and saw that there were a stack of clothes folded on the other bed along with your open luggage with some of your belongings inside. “Angel, what’s going on?” You pulled your head out of his chest to look at him, knowing that he was probably wondering why you were packing; and he had a sad expression on his face. 
“I’m leaving,” you simply said. 
“Leaving? Where are you going?” His brows furrowed. 
“I’m going back home.” 
“W-What? Why?” 
“I can’t be your assistant anymore, Harry,” you cried, and Harry’s heart sank as his jaw dropped. 
“What are you talking about? A-Are you quitting?” You stood up, placing the stack of clothes in your luggage as you sorted them. 
“Y-Yeah,” you said quietly, and Harry has never been more confused in his life. 
“W-What did I do wrong? I’m sorry we haven’t been seeing each other lately, but I promise after tour-”
“No, no. It’s not you, I promise,” you shook your head. In this moment, you felt like you should tell him everything because he deserved an explanation from you. “Please, listen, okay?” He nodded. You walked to sit on the desk chair in front Harry as he sat on the edge of the bed. You proceeded to tell him everything that Alex said from him asking you to be his girlfriend to you saying no. “He said these mean things that-”
“What the fuck did he say?” He gritted his teeth and took a deep breath. 
“Just listen,” you stopped him. “He said those things because I’m in love with someone else…I’m in love with you, and you probably heard Brooke say that, but you didn’t say anything, so I just assumed that you didn’t want to believe it.” It was the words Harry has been wanting to hear and he went to open his mouth, but you immediately started talking again. “I have been ever since I started working for you, and I thought it was just a crush on my boss, but it’s way more than that. Alex told me I’m not good enough for you and that you would never love me, and I think that’s true-” 
“No! That’s not true! I love-”
“Please, don’t,” you shook your head as you sobbed. You’ve been waiting for years to hear those words, but you knew that you couldn’t hear them just yet. “Don’t say those words because I’m leaving and to prove Alex wrong.” 
“I’m not trying to prove him wrong, it’s true,” Harry’s eyes watered, and you sighed.
“What he said got me thinking…I go to all these stores and pick shit up for your love interests, sending me a list of all their favorite things, and wishing that they were for me. And in the midst of it, I realized you don’t know what my favorite flower is! I’ve been hurting for so long that I covered it up everytime and put a fake smile on my face just to see you happy.”
“Your favorite flower is-”
“I just really think that I deserve to be happy as well,” you nodded your head as a way to try and convince yourself. 
“You do deserve to be happy, angel baby. But we can be happy together? I-I… want you here. With me.” His voice was filled with hope, and it only made it harder for you. 
You closed your eyes for a moment, burying your face in your hands. “I want that so bad. I do, H. But I really need to be happy with myself and by myself first. I depended on you and the others around me a lot, and I just didn’t save that love for myself, so…I need to leave,” you sniffled, wiping your cheeks. 
“And when you come back?” 
“I don’t know when that will be or what’s going to happen, but I’m not asking you to wait for me or anything because you should live your life. But when I come back, I’ll call you, and we’ll talk,” you told him, and it seemed like you had everything planned already, but you were just as lost as he was. He dropped his head, crying into his hands. You rolled your chair closer to him, grabbing his wrists, and he lifted his head. “We’ll be alright, okay? Just need a little time to myself.” He nodded, sniffling. 
You stood up and walked over to your luggage, zipping it closed before you looked around to see if you forgot anything. Harry stood up and walked over to you, grabbed your wrists, and pulled you to him, giving you a hug. His face was buried in your neck and you felt him press kisses against your skin as he cried. 
“You’ll be back?” The pain in his voice was enough to tip you over the edge of bawling. 
“Yeah, I’ll be back,” you said in between sniffs. “I’m going to stay with my parents for a while; get a job back in Oregon,” you told him, so he’s not completely out of the loop. He pulled back, looking down at you. 
“When you come back, your job will always be here.” You smiled sadly, raising your hand to caress his cheek. 
“We’ll see, okay? But I have to go to the airport now. My flight is in two hours,” you managed to free yourself from his grasp as it tightened so you wouldn’t go, but you really had to. 
“Let me drop you off?” He offered, and you shook your head. 
“No, it’s only going to make this harder,” you said, grabbing your luggage and backpack. “Have a great rest of the tour, alright? Take care of yourself,” you placed your palm on his cheek again, looking in his sad eyes before you reached up and kissed his cheek. “I’ll see you, honey.”
You walked out of the room with no glance back at him, and Harry was alone in your hotel room, and it was the last memory of you that would be ingrained in his mind forever. 
Tumblr media
14 July 2018 
The crowd cheered loud for Harry for his final show in Los Angeles. He overwhelmingly smiled as he took a deep breath before continuing onto the next song. Everyone seemed to know what the next song on the set list was, so the room went a bit quiet as the crowd turned on their flashlights as the lights went completely dark, and the only thing was heard was the strumming of the guitar. 
Woke up alone in this hotel room… As he sang, he took in his own lyrics, feeling like they really related to him at the moment despite writing the song two years ago. Harry sang with every emotion in him as he let it all out in the dark room that was silent, and the only thing he heard was his voice and the guitar that was played by Mitch. 
We haven’t spoke since you went away…He had thought of you every night he sang this song since you left in Seattle, and it pained him that there was no contact between you ever since you left, but he figured that was what you wanted. What you needed. 
Comfortable silence is so overrated… The moments when there would be silence between you two, he hated looking back at those moments because he knew he should’ve said something, you would’ve still been here. 
Why won’t you ever say what you want to say? Why didn’t you say anything, Harry? 
Even my phone misses your call, by the way…He missed your contact name pop up on his phone that went along with his contact picture for you. You were smiling bright as you ate ice cream. It was a summer day in New York and really warm outside, so you decided you two took a break from running around and got some ice cream. You were so happy that day, and he was happy he got it on camera. 
Harry would often find himself looking at your pictures together; trying to pinpoint the exact moment you knew you were in love with him. Your smile always made his day, and it broke his heart knowing that he wouldn’t get to see that smile for a long while--at least he hoped it’s not a long time till he gets to see you again. Since, he knew when his feelings had progressed, he looked back on the pictures when he knew he fell hard. His smile had gotten bigger and the look he gave you was full of love, and he wished that you saw how he looked at you. 
He missed you so much. 
Tumblr media
13 December 2019
It took you quite a while since you felt whole again. 
You hadn’t felt so empty as you had been when you left Seattle. The year and a half you spent back at home really helped you with that. You were able to find yourself again; spending time with your family and with yourself was something so refreshing that you cherished every moment with them. You learned a lot about yourself, and you reshaped your own worth and values. You came back stronger than ever and you’ve never been happier than you are now. 
You nervously walked over to the section you were going to be sitting in. The room was dark and the crowd was absolutely wild as they were finally seeing the one person they’ve been waiting for. You looked down, watching your step as you held your phone with the flashlight on your feet as they stepped onto the red floor of the pit, until you saw the familiar faces you’ve been looking for. 
“Y/N! There you are!” Glenne smiled, taking you in for a hug. “I’ve missed you babe,” she said in your ear as you hugged her tight. 
“I missed you too, so much.”
“Hey, Y/N. It’s good to see you again,” Jeff said, giving you a warm embrace. 
The music was playing and the crowd had gotten louder as the man of the hour finally stepped on stage, and all the spotlights were pointed on him. You watched him as he walked down from the high stage to the main stage, grabbing his guitar as said hello to everyone before strumming the first note. 
As you remembered, he was amazing on stage as he wore the same outfit as the album cover. He ignited the crowd with his charm and voice that left people in tears from being so overwhelmed by him. You felt overwhelmed as well; seeing him for the first time in a year and a half had made you quite emotional. 
You knew you wanted to go to Harry’s ‘One Night Only’ show when he first announced it. From keeping in contact with him, you figured you could keep in contact with updates of him, and what he’s up to these days. You streamed his music, watched his music videos, and stayed up late just to hear a snippet of him on the radio. You were always excited when you would get the notification on your phone of new pictures and videos of him because that was the only way you were able to see him. You found out that he had spent quite some time in Japan towards the end of last year and the beginning of this year. You really hoped he was doing okay. During the days of finding yourself, the thought of seeing him again had scared you, and you weren’t ready for that, so you waited until this day to see him. 
So, at the beginning of the week, you had texted Glenne that you wanted to go to the show, and she immediately said yes, putting your name on the list. You told her not to tell Harry just yet because you wanted to surprise him, and she was on board with the idea as was Jeff. 
They were both really supportive of you during your times sulking and growing, and Glenne had even visited you in Oregon to make sure you were okay and simply just missing you. You were really thankful for both of them because you knew that it was hard to see their two friends in pain, but you were glad that they supported your decision. Glenne had always known that you were in love with Harry, and you told her ever since you figured your feelings out. But you had made her swear on her life and Jeff’s that she wouldn’t say a word about it to anyone, not even Jeff (although Jeff saw it coming). 
“He’s going to be so happy to see you and know that you’re here,” Glenne said to you as the beginning of ‘Fine Line’ was starting. You thought the album was an  absolute masterpiece that was composed of beautiful lyrics, melodies, and emotion. You made sure to dance and cheer for the songs you didn’t know the words to extra loud, and you sang to the ones you knew without hesitation. You stayed up all night, listening to the album multiple times on repeat and trying to get the words down, and you were sure everyone did the same. 
As you listened to Harry sing the outro and the words ‘We’ll be alright’ coming out so effortlessly, you were reminded of your words to him as you left the hotel room. The song was quite hard hitting and you felt every inch of your skin cover in goosebumps. 
You practically lost your shit when Stevie Nicks came out and performed ‘Landslide’ with him, and when he sang ‘Wonderful Christmas Time’ while fake snow was falling from the ceiling. Before you knew it, Harry was in the middle of singing ‘Kiwi,’ and Glenne tapped your arm, telling you to follow her and you knew that you three were going backstage already. You felt butterflies in your stomach, feeling really nervous to see him again up close after a year and a half; and you only hoped that he was happy to see you as well. 
You heard the muffled final beat of the song as the crowd loudly cheered for him, telling him to do another song, but you knew that it was the end of the show. Jeff had walked way ahead of you both to grab Harry really quick, so he could point his attention towards you. Your hands were shaking as your arm was looped with Glenne’s as she provided physical support for you, holding you up, and continuously telling you that he’s going to be so ecstatic. 
Cheers erupted from the crew as everyone hugged each other, proud and happy of the success of Harry’s first show of his sophomore album. Once you were close enough, you could make out everyone’s faces. The band was there along with Harry’s friends and producers that had written the album with him. Finally, there was Harry; his back was facing you as he hugged Jeff, and Jeff gave you an amusing smile as he hugged his best friend. You heard him whisper into Harry’s ear, and Harry pulled back, saying, “What?” 
Jeff nodded, and Harry quickly turned around. His face was pulled into a shocked expression as his eyes widened and his body was practically frozen as he took in your presence. You smiled softly, waiting for him to say or do something because you didn’t know how he felt with you being here on his special night. 
Finally, he took two long strides towards you, pulling you in for a hug. Your body collided with his, and smiled into his shoulder, wrapping your arms around his tone body. 
“How are you?” You whispered in his ear as you practically felt him shaking in your arms. 
“I’m doing good. Better now,” he said softly. “What the fuck are you doing here, angel?” He chuckled, finally realizing that you were here in his arms. The sound of your pet name had widened your smile as your eyes watered; feeling so happy that you finally got to hear that name come from out of his mouth again. 
“Came to see you,” you said in his neck. He pulled back, looking at you in the eye before smiling like crazy as he took you in his arms again. He felt like he was on the moon; the overwhelming feeling of the feedback from the album, the show, and now finally getting to see you for the first time in a very long time—he truly couldn’t believe it, so he held you tight, not wanting to let you go as he felt like if he did, then you would vanish again. You felt his hesitancy or not wanting to let you go, so you whispered in his ear, “Hey, I’m here. Not leaving.” 
He eventually pulled back, and noticed everyone that gathered around you two, and smiles were on their faces with their hands over their hearts. They all had really witnessed Harry struggle the past year and a half; from song writing, recording, rehearsing, and just being present. They really saw Harry at his lowest, and now they're happy to finally see him happy now that you’re here. 
“I-I have to go meet some people and take some pictures, but do you think, uhm…” he trailed off, realizing that he might be acting too eager. 
“H, I’m right here. Do what you have to do, and I’ll wait for you, alright?” You told him with a smile, and he nodded. He didn’t want to walk away from you, but you knew that some people were waiting for him, so he had to leave. He gave you one last hug, which brightened your smile, and he walked down the hall of The Forum. “Stay in my dressing room!” He called out, and you laughed, remembering the talks and moments in his dressing room after his shows. 
Heading over to his dressing room, you stopped to say hi to everyone as they excitedly greeted you. You couldn’t believe that you were here again. The journey to get here was a struggle, but reuniting with everyone had made it so worth it—seeing Harry again was worth it, and you knew that you had to do it. 
After an hour of catching up with the crew and band, and sitting on his couch, mindlessly flipping through the pages of the Fine Line Booklet that contained pictures of Harry in the process of recording his album, he finally showed up. Sighing as he walked in from the rush of the entire day, once he saw your face again, he knew he wasn’t in the state of dreaming because you were really here. 
He took a seat on the couch next to you, taking your hand in his. He hesitantly raised your hand to his mouth and placed a kiss on the back of it; you smiled at the sweet gesture, caressing your thumb against his hand. 
“How are you, angel?” He asked, softly smiling as he was trying to contain his excitement that you’re finally here. 
“I’m good, H. I’m happy,” you said, and hearing that made Harry’s eyes glossy because that’s all he wanted from you. He wanted you to be happy; with yourself, with others, and with life. 
“I’m so glad to hear you say that,” he smiled, dimples poking out. You reached over to caress his cheek, rubbing his dimple out, and he turned his head to kiss the inside of your hand. 
“I want to hear everything from you--catch me up on everything?” He nodded eagerly, wanting that from you too. 
“Security said that the parking lot is empty now because they had to practically kick everyone out, so there’s no one out there, but what do you say we go out there and walk around the parking lot?” He suggested. It was almost midnight, and despite being exhausted and overwhelmed by this whole day, he’d rather stay up and talk for hours with you. 
“Are you sure? You’re not tired?” You asked, and he shook your head. 
“No, not at all. It’s been a year and a half since I last saw you. I want to spend time with you.”
“Okay, I’d like that,” you smiled, and he nodded, telling you that he was going to change really quick. He walked over to his duffel bag, grabbing some clothes before walking over to the changing room that was in his dressing room. Before he walked in, he turned around, facing you. 
“Hey.” You perked up, smiling. He missed your smile so damn much. “Your favorite flower is a baby pink peony,” he said before walking into the room. 
You were immediately taken back to the night when you had left when you had told him that he didn’t know what your favorite flower was, but all this time, he knew. He had always known. 
Walking towards the exit of the venue, the night was dark as the moon shined from up above you. With cold air rushing through you, you shivered, and Harry smiled next to you as you two walked through the emptiness of the parking lot. Before you two even spoke a word on how to go about having the ‘catch up’ conversation, you sensed Harry’s nervousness as he felt a bit hesitant with you because of the distance and time spent apart. But you wanted to remind him that you were the same person. You had the same feelings for him, and you really hoped he had some feelings for you too. 
So, you brushed your left hand against his right hand, cheeks flushed, and you interlock your fingers together, holding his warm ringed hand with your small one. 
This was it--this moment right here. This was where you were supposed to be. 
Tumblr media
please come into my inbox and tell me how you’re feeling and what you thought of this! she was an emotional one :’)
5K notes · View notes
Text
-> original AU's for the inazuma characters ----- warnings -> none! ----- characters included -> yoimiya, ayaka, yae, gorou, kokomi, sara, ei, thoma ----- who wants more parts for this :')? or I can do headcanons for these,, it's up to y'all- (these are also AU's with these characters,, like I've never seen a streamer! ayaka before. I did NOT come up with the streamer! AU,, but you get the gist-) ----- thoughts below the cut!
yoimiya: grocery store employee! AU
yoimiya as a grocery store worker would be so incredible. her bubbly personality would be very popular among shoppers, and her customer service is on point. she's always kind to everyone, even the occasional rude person. she's unimaginably patient with everyone, and is always there to assist others! whenever someone spills something in an aisle, that's ok! yoimiya has the mop right then and there! a kid needs help with self-checkout? she's already within a 10ft radius of it!
ayaka: streamer! AU
ayaka as a streamer would be a blessing to this earth. she especially loves horror games,, and her reactions are the best. her reactions can range from her literally freezing on the spot, letting out a cute little squeak, or full-blown shrieking. ayato often comes in to check on her, and holy shit do her fans love him. they love his dashing looks and soothing voice,, almost more than they love ayaka's. she also wears fuzzy socks and cute pajama pants when she streams, and the sight is too cute to bear. she has on pair of pants she wears most often, and they have tiny panda's on them, and she wears a lavender t-shirt most of the time as well.
yae: nurse! AU
you cannot tell me yae would not be fantastic in as a sly and seductive nurse. she'd purposely bend down to display her cleavage to her patients, and they'll often fake injuries just to come to see her again. she'll wink at them and turn her head over her shoulder,, purposely trying to look hot. she also visits yoimiya in the grocery store on the daily, and they talk about men (+ women,, people of any gender <3) and how stupid they are.
gorou: programmer! AU
gorou would be such a hot emo programmer boy and you know it. he'd have glasses with a slim black rim,, and would wear a black turtleneck and jeans to match. he'd look so basic yet so hot, and his voice would be deep and mysterious. he'd be "that one hot emo guy" at your school,, the one all the girls would secretly swoon over. he'd come off as aloof and distant, but he's actually a big softie on the inside.
kokomi: gardener! AU
kokomi would be the cutest gardener,, and would have the cutest little daisies dabbled all over her household. on the outside, rose bushes and irises with dahlias engulfed her yard, and the sight really is just downright breathtaking. she'll often ramble on and on about the language of the flowers, and it's really really cute hshshshs-
sara: hairstylist! AU
sara would be the hottest single mom hairstylist ever. she'd be the best at french and dutch braids, and would find the most interesting things to talk about while she does hair. it's also oddly satisfying to watch her work, and her hands move so quickly it almost looks like she's not trying to style hair at all. somehow it comes out perfect every time, though-
ei / raiden shogun: model! AU
ei would make the best model in the world,, as well as the hottest. people from all over the world would come to her fashion shows, and her magazines are insanely popular. she's "the model", and the one woman every young girl aspires to look like. her long and silky hair and her perfectly shaped face make her all the more attractive, not to mention how she rocks black party dresses/cocktail dresses.
thoma: teacher! AU
thoma would be the best teacher in the world,, and would most likely teach first grade. I'm not sure why that's the first grade that came to mind,, but it just kinda fits,, y'know?? he and the kiddos would be besties, and he adores when the kids take the time to talk to him during lunch and/or recess. he cherishes picture day, and even orders pictures of all of his students to frame and hang upon his wall.
164 notes · View notes
Text
Worship
Howdy everyone no one asked for this but I saw a pic of Asa and the fact that I could see his man tum made me go absolutely feral and i needed to write about it thanks besties hope yall enjoy sdfghgfdfghgf
Asa Emory x GN Reader Word count: ~700 Warnings: Lots of body worship, mentions of oral, submissive reader
Tumblr media
As soon as his deft fingers unlock the collar from around your neck, you quickly kneel on the ground before him. He barely has to instruct you what to do anymore, instead, he settles himself on a chair in the middle of the room. You crawl towards him as he leans back, spreading his legs so you can settle yourself between them. Looking up at him with awe, his eyes shine from behind his mask as he watches you carefully.
You raise yourself to your knees, placing your hands on his firm thighs with trepidation. A low purr rises from his throat as your fingers inch towards the front of his pants, his cock already hard behind the straining fabric. You tremble as you touch the leather of his belt, his breath hitching as he waits for you to continue. Before he can punish you for taking your sweet time with it, you look up at him with the most innocent look you can muster. Hands drifting just above the belt towards the hem of his black turtleneck, you ask, “Please, sir, may I touch you more?”
Asa looked down at you, so small and fragile and ready to drop everything to fulfill his whims. His abdomen twitched at the tender yet questioning touch just below his navel. Slowly, his mouth curled into a sadistic smile, sending shivers down your spine and sparks igniting the arousal in your belly. “You may,” was his only response, his words like molasses to your ears, trapping you in its sweet and sticky trap.
Eagerly you pushed his sweater up, revealing his stomach to you. It was such an intimate act, revealing his most vulnerable areas to you, and yet you had proved yourself as a loyal pet. That deserved some sort of reward. And Asa gave the best rewards for good pets that obeyed.
Your fingers glided up his stomach, stroking the light trail of hair that disappeared below his waistband. Thumbs lovingly stroked over the slight pooch of his stomach, feeling him tense beneath you. You would never admit it out loud lest you anger him, but you couldn’t help but feel your breath quicken whenever you got the pleasure of seeing him fully naked before you. He was far from unhealthy by any means, but seeing that glimpse of his tummy drove you wild. While you certainly didn’t mind washboard abs or rippling muscle, something about this terrifyingly brutal man having such a normal physique sent your head spinning. His muscle was all real, his body perfectly fit, and he displayed it often with how he easily dragged you around like a ragdoll. 
Without a second thought, you leaned forward, lips brushing sweetly against his abdomen. Asa held his breath as he watched the genuinely romantic action. It always surprised him how no matter how much he deprived you, teased you, edged you, and made you cry, that you would still treat him like a lover when allowed free reign over him. You almost threatened to make him soft. Almost. 
Feather-light kisses trailed down his stomach, hands on his thighs as you savored the time you were allowed to do this with him before he took control again. His slow breaths were hypnotizing, lulling you into a gentle rhythm. Each kiss along the slight curve of his belly felt heavenly, worshipful, like how the satin sheets of the bed felt against your bare skin when he rewarded you by making love instead of brutally fucking you. As you dipped below his navel the tickle of his hair over your lips made you smile against him. You wanted these moments to linger forever, locked in limbo with your master as you simply sought comfort through each other’s touch.
But as you pressed the last kiss above the coarse fabric of his pants, his hand slowly but firmly yanked your head back. Fingers curled in your hair, you gasped sharply as you were met with his eyes again. His lips hung open as he panted, looking down at you with only lust in his dark stare. As he held you in one hand he used the other to quickly yank at the buckle of his belt, causing your heart to quicken. “That’s enough. My turn now.”
171 notes · View notes