The LAYERS needed in a modern/human Dreamling au. Some level of Endless family dysfunction, obviously. Hob's family can be be dead or not, it's all good. Are they old enough to have individually gained the awareness they are off-puttingly intense and should hide it a bit at first, or still in that "no, why would I need to Elsa this" stage?
Option A is both of them trying to play it cool, like "don't scare him off" except they so badly want to go from zero to sixty.
(Death and Desire have ruthlessly drilled Dream with flashcards about how to react appropriately in situations.
Desire: it's your one-month anniversary, what do you do?
Dream: [hesitantly] NOT propose?
Desire and Death, conferring, because that's technically correct but the delivery was suspect.
Death, encouragingly: Good start. And?
Dream: a nice dinner and maybe a walk?
Desire: well done!
Death: and for a three-month anniversary?
Dream: give them a key to my flat.
Desire: [airhorn] NO. RED CARD.)
Option B makes them the classic anecdotal "my grandparents got engaged within seven days of meeting each other and still are happy together".
(Death, rubbing her temples: so you met this guy--
Dream: Hob
Death: -- Hob, and within 1 day you gave notice to the Registrar's Office and figured out the best day to get married. And Hob agreed to this?
Dream: NO.
Death: oh thank go-
Dream: Hob SUGGESTED this.
Death: . . .
Dream: are you going to be a witness or not?
Death, 29 days later in the Registrar's Office, to Hob's witness: Is he sane?
Johanna Constantine, drinking heavily from a large flask: unfortunately yes, by all legal definitions.
Death: fuck
Johanna: [passing the flask over] if your brother's even a tenth as intense as Hob, they'll be fine. Probably.
Death, brightening: Is Hob that bad?
Johanna: You know how sometimes you meet somebody and think "oof, they're a bit much, best give them a wide berth"?
Death: yeah.
Johanna: Hob's like a camouflaged hole in the ground of muchness. Except he's done the hole up all nice and he knows that sometimes you just want to be left alone in the hole to sulk and rattle the spikes for a bit, and occasionally get a F&M hamper tossed in.
Death: [hmmmmmmm'ing approvingly]
Johanna, morose: the bastard.
In the background, Hob and Dream are pressing their foreheads together and basking in each other's presence)
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*Turns on megaphone* Lucifer Morningstar is a Service Top! ...That is all.
THANK YOU!
Can we all readdress the fact that Lucifer is a canonical switch? I understand liking bottom!Lucifer, I really do, but let this man top. As a RadioApple fan, is it really too much to want Alastor to get properly railed 😩
I suppose I'll have to be the change I want to see in the world, but I still wanna read/see it.
I'm pretty sure this is why I've been consuming so much RadioStatic content lately. Their dynamic is amazing AND Alastor gets to bottom. It's perfect.
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Incorrect Gilded Rose/Pyrruby?
Ruby: *finishing up a dreamy spirit journey after ascending in the Ever After*
Ruby: Thank you both for helping me sort out my emotions.
Spirit Penny: Of course, friend Ruby! It was never your fault! Now farewell!
Spirit Pyrrha: I’m happy we could help you, Ruby. But before I go, may I ask a big favor?
Ruby: Anything, Pyrrha! You want me to take care of Jaune for you? Tell him your last message?
Spirit Pyrrha: *looks to the side, nervously tapping her fingertips together* …actually…could I…maybe…possess your body while you have sex with him…? 😅
Ruby: …
Ruby: …what…?
Spirit Pyrrha: 😖 Can I be in your body during sex with Jaune?
Ruby: No! That’s so weird!! Why would you even ask that?!
Spirit Pyrrha: Oh come on! Pleeeeaaaaase?! Every day he gets hotter and regret my choices more and more!!
Ruby: I’m not doing that!!
Spirit Pyrrha: Please?!
Ruby: No!
Spirit Pyrrha: PLEASE!!!!
Ruby: No!!
Later…
Ruby: *naked, on the edge of the bed* WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU’RE STUCK?! We had a deal!!!
Pyrrha!Ruby: I’m sorry! I’ve never done this before! I’m still figuring out how it works! 😭
Jaune: *laying naked in bed, watching his new girlfriend angrily yelling at/apologizing to herself*
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one thing i really like abt grimmons is, in a way, the only thing really in the way of it is their rancid communication skills and pathetic inexperience with romance. like, grif and simmons both know everyone else fucking knows. they also do couple-y things and they KNOW it. the thing is they just DONT fucking talk about it. they are ALLERGIC to feelings and talking it out. its NOT a matter of stupidity and ignorance — they just dont fucking know how to even BEGIN to navigate it, and it fucking kills me dead.
i LOVE that. i love how theres this really unspoken codependency that toes the line and breaks both of their brains.
its not quite pining in the traditional sense of the word. but its not like its unrequited. its like mutual emotional twister. how far can we go without directly tackling the issue? how the fuck do we even adapt traditional romance when we’re fucking 40 or something and all we’ve known is war and death and sarcasm? left hand red, right hand orange. LOL
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thinking about moon knight having marc call steven the best superpower he's ever had during a really emotional moment and how that show handled DID better than just about any piece of media I've ever seen and. I'm sobbing actually. they equated his neurodivergence with being the greatest part of him after marc had spent so long trying to hide his DID out of shame. and maybe that sounds like bordering on glorification but it really wasn't. because they made it so obvious that what marc meant was that steven kept him ALIVE and that's the most he could ever ask for and anyway. whatever whatever it's fine
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