#sdr2 incorrect quotes | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

alex-just-vibing · 2 years

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Fuck you I'm gonna make sdr2 survivor incorrect quotes and none of you can stop me (spoiler warning for who survives)

Hajime: Don’t stay up all night, Akane. Last time you got this sleep-deprived, you tried to eat your own shirt.

Akane: When you work at lush and a customer comes in and bites the soap because they think it’s cheese... this happens way more frequently than you think. Kazuichi: If you stopped literally presenting soap as deli food this wouldn't happen. Akane: Who goes into a bath store and thinks something covered in glitter is cheese? Hajime: Who goes to the store and just takes a bite from the cheese?

Hajime: I just want someone to take me out. Kazuichi: On a date? Sonia: With a sniper gun? Fuyuhiko: Both if you're not a coward.

Fuyuhiko, holding a rock: Kazuichi just gave this to me and said "I feel like you deserve the moon but all I can give you is a rock". Hajime: If you don't marry them, I will.

Hajime: What do you do when someone offers you drugs? Kazuichi: Take them! Akane: Punch them in the neck! Sonia: Say thank you! Fuyuhiko: Offer them more drugs to assert dominance! Hajime: … Hajime: No.

Hajime: I’m telling you, my team is competent. Sonia, rushing in: Hajime! Kazuichi tried to make pasta in the coffee pot and now it's broken!

Akane: As someone who has a long history of not understanding anything, I feel confident in my ability to continue not knowing what is going on.

Akane: If you spell skeletons backwards, it still spells skeletons. Hajime, deadpan: Wow, I can't wait for Halloween to see some snoteleks.

Kazuichi: If I run and leap at Hajime, he will most certainly catch me in his arms. Kazuichi, running towards Hajime: Coming in! Hajime: No! I’m holding coffee! Hajime: *Drops coffee and catches Kazuichi*

Fuyuhiko, at the slightest provocation: I came into this earth screaming and covered in someone else's blood and and I'm not afraid to leave the same way.

Akane: If you put a milkshake in one yard and crack open a cold one in another yard, which yard would the boys go to? Kazuichi: Schrödinger's boys. Hajime: FUCK! Sonia: What about cracking open a cold milkshake? Fuyuhiko: As we all know, the milkshake brings the boys to the yard. The presence of the boys is a prerequisite for the cracking open of a cold one, but cold ones do not have any inherent boy-attracting abilities. Milkshakes, however, do. Fuyuhiko: All else being equal, the boys would proceed to the milkshake yard. While it is possible to announce the presence of cold ones in the hope of attracting some boys, the pull of the milkshake is much more powerful by comparison. Akane: ... Kazuichi: ... Hajime: ... Sonia: ... Fuyuhiko: Mind you, all of this nonsense hinges on whether or not the boys are back in town.

Kazuichi: BWWAAAAAAAAAA! Oh, you hear that? That's the wrong opinion alarm. Fuyuhiko: That is not something you actually have installed. Kazuichi: Sorry, say again? I couldn't hear you over my alarm that YOU SET OFF with your WRONG-ASS OPINION

Hajime: Two brooooos! Kazuichi: Chillin' in a hot tub! Hajime: Five feet apart 'cause we're not gay! Kazuichi: Hajime: Kazuichi: *tearing up* Hajime: Babe, c'mon... Kazuichi: AND HERE YOU REALLY HAD ME THINKING WE HAD SOMETHING. Hajime: Babe...

Kazuichi, Entering Fuyuhiko's room: Akane did it again. Fuyuhiko: Peace disturbance? Kazuichi: What no- Fuyuhiko: Arson..? Kazuichi: NO, JESUS CHRIST, HOW MANY- Fuyuhiko: uh....Attempted murder? Kazuichi: NO, SHE ATE ALL THE FOOD IN THE FRIDGE, BUT WHAT THE FU-

Kazuichi: Hey random, what are your favorite flowers? Hajime: Peonies, why? Kazuichi: Hajime: Were you going to get me flowers? Kazuichi: Hajime: Kazuichi: ᶦᵗ’ˢ ᵃ ᵖᵒˢˢᶦᵇᶦˡᶦᵗʸ

Hajime: Bottling up negative emotions is bad for your health, so you shouldn't do it. Fuyuhiko: I know, that's why I bottle up all my emotions, both positive and negative, so it cancels out. Hajime: Th-that's not how that works-

Akane, setting down a card: Ace of spades. Fuyuhiko, pulling out an Uno card: +4. Hajime, pulling out a Pokémon card: Jolteon, I choose you! Kazuichi, trembling: What are we playing?!

Akane: Would you like something to drink? *She opens the fridge* We have water, milk, juice, spiders, Dr. Pepper- Kazuichi: Spiders? Akane: Spiders it is then. Kazuichi: No, that wasn’t- *But she were already pouring them a brimming glass of spiders…*

Hajime: I swear to god I'm the only one here with a braincell. Sonia, Kazuichi, Fuyuhiko, and Akane: ALL HAIL the keeper of the sacred braincell!

Akane, knocking on the door: Kazuichi, open up! Kazuichi: It all started when I was a kid. Akane: That’s not what I- Fuyuhiko: Let him finish!

Sonia: Fuyuhiko doesn’t look very happy. Hajime: That's his happy. He's just a bitch.

Hajime: BEHOLD, the field in which I grow my fucks! Lay thine eyes upon it, and thou shalt see that it is barren!

Akane: How is the most beautiful person in the world? Sonia: *blushing* I— Hajime, butting into the conversation: Kaz is perfect, thanks for asking.

Fuyuhiko, grinning: I have a knife! Sonia: Put it down, Fuyuhiko. Fuyuhiko: Make me! *sprints away*

Kazuichi: Are you an F5 key? Because that ass is refreashing. Hajime: Are you a software update? because not right now.

Kazuichi: It's pretty cold outside.. wanna hold hands? We should stay close. Hajime, blushing: Okay. Fuyuhiko: It's fucking summer.

Akane: *sees Kazuichi and Fuyuhiko together* Akane: They're cute. I would put them on a boat. Hajime: You mean... you ship them?

Hajime: *speaking Spanish* Kazuichi: I know, I know. Fuyuhiko: You speak Spanish? Kazuichi: No. I just know the phrase, 'this is all your fault' in every language Hajime speaks.

Kazuichi: Look, I know you think my judgement's clouded because I like Hajime a little bit. Fuyuhiko, holding Kazuichi's notepad: You doodled your wedding invitation. Kazuichi: No, that's our joint tombstone. Fuyuhiko: My mistake.

Kazuichi: The last time I went to an urgent care clinic, I checked off 'excessive crying' on the symptom list, and then the nurse got really confused and said that was meant for babies.

Fuyuhiko: Dandelions symbolize everything I want to be in life. Kazuichi: Fluffy and dead with a gust of wind? Fuyuhiko: Unapologetic. Hard to kill. Feral, filled with sunlight, bright, beautiful in a way that the conventional and controlling hate but cannot ever fully destroy. Stubborn. Happy. Bastardous. Friends with bees. Highly disapproving of lawns. Full of wishes that will be carried far after I die. Hajime: Edible.

Hajime: Yo! I heard you like reptiles, got any fun facts? Kazuichi: If a crocodile eats your dad, they become your new dad.

Hajime: Are you the big spoon or the little spoon? Fuyuhiko: I'm a knife. Kazuichi, from across the room: He's the little spoon.

Kazuichi: The greatest trick the devil ever played was getting me banned from an all you can eat pizza buffet. Fuyuhiko: Why’d you get banned? Kazuichi: Touched the rat. Fuyuhiko: … What rat? Kazuichi: Chunky Cheese.

Kazuichi: We have a problem. Hajime: No, YOU have a problem. I have an idiot who keeps making them.

Hajime: Why is Kaz crying? Fuyuhiko: They saw a leaf on the sidewalk and- Kazuichi: IT LOOKED SO CRUNCHY! Hajime: Please don’t say what I think you’re gonna say- Kazuichi: AND WHEN I STEPPED ON IT THERE WAS NO CRUNCH! Hajime: NO, NOT THAT!

Fuyuhiko: You shouldn't be using a straw. Kazuichi: I know, I know, it's bad for the environment and stuff. Fuyuhiko: Yeah, but I mean... it's a weird way to eat spaghetti.

Fuyuhiko, pointing to the wall: What color is this? Kazuichi: Gray. Sonia: Grey. Fuyuhiko, turning to Akane: Now tell them what color you think it is. Akane: Dark white.

Sonia: Would you slap Kazuichi- Hajime: Yes. Sonia: I didn't even finish! Hajime: Sorry, continue. Sonia: Would you slap Kazuichi for 10 dollars? Hajime: I would do it for free. Kazuichi: Rude...

Kazuichi: This date is boring! Fuyuhiko: This isnt a date. I said I was going to the store. Kazuichi: Then why did you invite me? Fuyuhiko: I didnt, I specifically said "dont come with me" then you said " fuck you Fuyuhiko I'll do whatever I want!

*Kazuichi and Fuyuhiko playing minecraft* Kazuichi: Oh no, oh no, oh no- Fuyuhiko: What’s wrong? Kazuichi: I did a thing. Fuyuhiko: You regret the thing you dID- Kazuichi: *screams* Fuyuhiko: What the fuck did you do- *sees mass of aggravated Piglin* Damn it- Kazuichi: *screams again*

Kazuichi: We’ll find another route, it’s not safe for amateur adventurers. Akane: That sounds like a challenge. Kazuichi: I have to stress, that is not a challenge. Akane: ...Is exactly what you say to dissuade the weak of heart from accepting the challenge. Well, challenge accepted! Kazuichi: There is no challenge!

Kazuichi: *Locks Fuyuhiko in the car.* Look like a child, get treated like a child. Fuyuhiko: What? Isn't it illegal to leave a child locked in a car?

Kazuichi: Is the pink panther a lion? Hajime: Say that again but slower. Kazuichi: I don’t get it. Hajime: He’s a PANTHER. Kazuichi: Is that a type of lion? Hajime: No, it’s a fucking panther. Kazuichi: *googles panther* They aren’t pink? Hajime: AND LIONS ARE?!

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