#screaming @ myself no BIGGIE

[soldier--poet--queen]

oh tumblr mutuals we're really in it now

#rin rambles #rin rants #this week is the con and i still need to finish my cosplay #no biggie for the most part #what IS a biggie is that i also need to finish these other peoples' cosplay. and they. uhm. #best way how i can describe them is they were giving me shit last monday for not having everything done and one of them just finished the #first 1/4 of their outfit saturday #so i feel like i need to do everything myself right #so i want to give myself a haircut right #fix up my undercut right #WRONG IM GOING TO SCREAM #now i have a shitty self-made haircut with an entirely new piece of armor i need to make #because these same people thought unspoken requests were just requests #slamming my head in a wall

[loloslaystheday]

The World

pairing: katsuki bakugou x fem!reader

warnings: some fluff, some angst, no biggy. spoilers if you haven’t watched season 6 or read chapter 285+

katsuki never really thought about dating. he’s too busy for dating, and he doesn’t need a girlfriend. he never saw the need for one.

besides, it’d only slow him down. focusing on anything but becoming a hero was a waste of time.

but if that was truly how he felt, then why couldn’t he stay away from you?

why couldn’t he stop himself from loving you, from telling you he loved you, from holding you right now before he had to leave you.

“dang, katsuki, i’ll be here if you let me go for 2 seconds.”

“i don’t give a damn.”

“i gotta pee, bruh!”

his arms tightened around your waist, a smirk tugging at his lips as you squirmed and tried to push him off so you could get up and go to the bathroom.

“i’m not playing with you, man!” you grunted. after a few more moments of struggling, you managed to weasel your way out of his embrace and run off to the bathroom. “damn!”

he chuckled to himself. a sight and sound only you would get to hear.

unless, of course, he was laughing maliciously- but that isn’t the same thing.

his smile faded with each second until his usual scowl returned. he grabbed his phone, turned it on, and read the text.

too soon. he felt like he was leaving you too soon.

no time in the world would be enough to prepare him for what was to come.

as a matter of fact; he barely even knew what was to come. attacking the villains was a wildcard, with shigaraki apparently getting a power up or whatever.

“if i woulda pissed myself i’d beat your ass.” you joked, walking out of the bathroom and flopping down at katsuki’s side.

“yeah, yeah.” he grunted, nuzzling into your neck. he could smell your perfume and the faint scent of your lotion. he couldn’t get enough of it, he couldn’t get enough of you.

“whaaat are you doing?” you pulled back a big, eyebrow cocked as you stared at Katsuki like a stranger.

“w’you mean?” he gave you a slight glare.

“you’re not usually this touchy.. you want sum? i ain’t having sex with you until-“

“no you dumbass. i just wanted to… cuddle. is that do wrong?”

“from you? hell yes.”

he rolled his eyes, pushing your head back down to rest on his chest. his hand rubbed your back in gentle strokes.

“seriously, suki, what’s wrong?” you asked in a softer tone.

he debated telling you. he should tell you. but he just… didn’t want to.

“nothing.” he sighed.

you didn’t push further. you wish you did. you should have.

because as you stood there, staring at your tv, watching katsuki and izuku and endeavor take on shigaraki, your heart wouldn’t slow down and your tears wouldn’t stop flowing.

and in your head, you couldn’t help but think.

‘why didn’t he tell me?’

‘did he even know?’

‘please just be careful.’

because he was your world.

the whole time; you had the world in your hands and you didn’t even know. you took advantage of your luck.

but he was thinking the same thing.

he had the world in his hands, he didn’t want to let it go. if he had a choice he’d be home with you right now, protecting you and making sure that you’re safe.

making sure that you didn’t have to see him push his best friend out of the way and take the hit for him.

he didn’t regret it, but he regretted imagining the look on your face as you saw it. the scream you probably let out, and the sobs that couldn’t be contained for the life of you.

he just wished he was there to hold you and comfort you, to let you know he was alright and he wouldn’t let a bastard like shigaraki defeat him.

but for now?

you just had to pray he’d make it home safe.

despite your hands that trembled as they rested over your eyes, you refused to look away for too long because he was fighting for you and mitski and masaru and everyone he loved.

he was doing it all to protect his world, his reason to live.

and you would watch to make sure his sacrifices were all worth it and to let him know, if not in that moment, if not in person, but in spirit that you were there.

then damn it, it was worth it.

#x reader angst #black reader #bakugou katsuki #katsuki bakugo x reader #katsukibakugou #plus size reader #fat reader #fem reader #x reader

[thisonesatellite]

a sort of homecoming 1/1

...so, guys. i did a thing. i wrote a Leverage fic.

A few months back i was a little stuck inside real life insanity and writing despite all my rage, and i started watching Leverage for the first time. Yes, i know, so late to the party. But also--- i fucking loved the show.

Love the show. Still. Forever. For reasons.

Anyway. There i was, trying not to go off my rocker and started to write this bit of self-indulgence just to clear my head, and it was wonderful. Nobody knew i was doing it. Nobody was waiting for me to finish. i was never going to post it and so i didn't have to check myself or be reasonable or curb my instincts, i could let the self-indulgence run absolutely fucking rampant. And. i. did.

And it gave me the opportunity to build an entire original character from scratch. Which was so much fun.

But then i made the mistake had the good fortune of telling some people what i was doing and they went ahead and screamed shouty support encouraged my lunacy and here we are.

With a whole finished fic.

a sort of homecoming

SUMMARY: This starts in a corrupt medical testing facility (taken straight out of "The Experimental Job") and then takes a hard left into unknown territory, featuring intrigue and fraud, corruption and redemption, bad guys and worse guys, and comeuppance for all. Told from an outsider's point of view. This is my take on a Leverage episode-- with all the plot and hoops to jump through, but also a little bit of connection and human touch. It's not really a love story. It's first and foremost a character study with a bit of action. But there are some feelings here, too.

With all the thanks in the world to @cable-knit-sweater, because i may or may not have confided in her first and she said the LOVELIEST THINGS, and @optomisticgirl, because she did some epic support screaming, as well as a lightning-fast beta that only resulted in me having to add a piddly 2K words, no biggie. And of course to @ohmightydevviepuu who told me about Leverage before anyone else, it's true, but had the misfortune of doing so in one of those phases where my brain could not handle new stuff and was rewatching firefly and The Expanse, etc. 😂😂😂

And lastly, this is a gift for my lovely @anxioussquirrel -- who turned me on to Leverage again, last year, and who deserves all the good things in the world. i love you. A lot. 💕💕💕

#leverage #leverage fic #thisonesatellite #don't even @ me #i have no clue what i'm doing #then again - i never do #please forgive me

[ninja-knox-ur-sox-off]

OKAY STRAIGHT UP THIS FEELS TOO SOON, WATCHING TWO IN A DAY FEELS LIKE SO MUCH WITH THIS BUT HEY LETS KEEP ON SCHEDULE AND MAKE UP FOR MISSING LAST WEEK TO MYSELF

TIME FOR LMK SES 4 EP 7

First of all last ep was whack still trying to analyze what the heck was going on with Mk being crafted from Monkey Kings stone or something, like did I MENTION THE WONDERING IF SOMEONE MADE HIM AS A BACKUP IN CASE SWK GOES WHACK AGAIN? BECAUSE?? HECK MAN THAT’D BE CRAZY I’M JUST SITTING HERE LETS GO

okay iNHALES

here we go

THE DUNNNNNNNNNNNNN THAT HAPPENS IMMEDEATELYGBDFMSDF

PITIFUL CREATURES

OKAY

HELLO SMILEY INK MK HOWS IT BOPPIN

WHATS THE MATTER GUY

HELPGNSDFKMAOIEFM

“y… yeah actually that’s exactly what i want! :D “

;-;

well heck then ig

no more monster of the week adventures ;-;

“You’re not my friend, YOU’RE NOT ME”

HECK I’M HAVING A MOMENT OVER THIS IG

OH THE STAFF YESSSS

BEST FRIEND? HELP???GHL;SDFSD

OH THIS IS FUN

WHERE YOU GOING GUY?

UP ALL INSIDE OF MY HEAD

HORRIFYING THIS IS GREAT

I’M LOVING THIS

THIS IS AWESOME ACTUALLY SO SORRY YOU’RE GOING THROUGH THIS MK BUT THIS IS GREAT

I’M JUST MK, NOODLE DILIVERY GUY, WITH THE- POWERS FO THE MONKEY NO BIGGIE GBSDLFJASDFJ

OKAY INK MK BEATING UP REGULAR MK WOW THAT WAS A PUNCH

DANG

WILDIN

okay like at this point iv’e stopped having thoughts and am Just kinda watching heck HGSALK;JFASDF

AH YES BACK TO THE CREW

WHATS UP MY BELOVEDS

MEI’S ON A MISSION HERE HGSLDKFJSDF

I miss Ao lei ;-;

TANGEY GET YOUR HEAD IN THE GAME

GRAVE DIGGING HELP

MA’AM

TANG?????

BUDDY????

OH TANG BUDDY

AW

SANDY

HECK

THIS IS GOOD

SANDY IS SUCH A MISSING PUZZLE PIECE CALIMMING EVERYBOYD DOWN

AIR

MONKEY KING

MISS YOU

ma’am i love yo you’re great

MONKEY KING???

DO WE GET??

oh bruh

that

HECK?? A CRACK IN THE SKY???

HECK??

OH MK INK FIGHT FIGHT FIHGT FIGHT

STUFF MK DOESN’T WANT OT THINK ABOUT HUH THAT’S FAIR

OFC I’VE THOUGHT ABOUT IT

MAYBE

PLS WHY

YEAH

HECK

JUST WANTS TO BE MK

HECK MAN I’M JUST SITTING HERE

OH THE LBD VOICE MOMENT

THIS INK THING SNATCHING THE STAFF

OH WOW FIRE PUNCH THERE

WE HELP PEOPLE, I MEAN I HELP PEOPLE

OH THE SCROLL FR SLAPPIN

THIS IS GONNA HAUTN MY NIGHTMARESNGLSMKFMWEOMF

OH WHAT A MIS-MATCH OF ALL THE STUFF MK’S FOUGHT AND THEN INK MONKEY HEAD THIS IS

I LITERALLY JUST GOTTA SIT HERE AND LISTEN TO THEM TALK IT/FIGHT IT OUT HECKGN;SLFKS

WHOAH HEY

HEY I SAW THAT

MONKEY FR

RIGHT THERE

OH THAT’S NEAT

SO WE’RE ACTUALLY GOING TO SEE MONKEY MK IN THIS HUH

aw man is he yellow? :T LOOK IT LOOKS WEIRD OKAY WHERE’S THE MONKEY NOSEG;LKSMFWF

i can’t believe i get a single glimpse of the design and I’m nitpicking it SORRY I’M JUST GOING HTROUGH IT AND AND GRASPING AT STRAWS TO FEEL NORMALGL;DSMDS

SCREAMS

I JUST SAT THROUGH ALL OF THAT MONKEY KING SIR MATE MAN WE SAW HIM FOR A SECOND I DIDN’T THINK WE WOULD HECK OKAY MONKEY MK FR I FEEL LIKE I NEEED TO GBAC K AND TO THROUGH ALL THAT FRAME BY FRAME HANG ON

THE STOP

HECK

CRACKS IN IT

WILDIN LIKE WHAT IS GOING ON

YEAH BOIIIII THAT’S WHAT I’M TLAINGABOTU JHECKIGN  

KID

MONKEEEYYYY

HECK

THERE HE IS

I DIDN’T THINK HE’D SHOW UP OH MY GOSH ITS HIM

MONKEEEYYYYYYYYYYYYY

HECK WHATS HAPPENIGN

HOW’D WUKONG GET OUT OF THE CURSE TO KNOW WHAT’S GOING ON

OH WOW THAT’ S A LOT OF PWOER

BUT ITS FINE

HECKIN

I AM

HECK MAN MK JUST SO RELIEVED TO SEE HIM

WOW THAT’S A GIANT

HECKING

THINK MONSTER

YEAHAHHHH

CREW BACK

WB WB

WELCOME BACK

I LIKE THE ENERGY

HELPGNL;SDKFMDS

CURSE GIANT

OH BOY WUKONG LIKE WDYM THIS GUY HEY BRING THE MONKEYS BACK

AW

OH WOW

CIRCLET

SHUT UP BACK OFF

CIRCLET

MONKEY KING GO BRRRRRR

DARN RIGHT

OH THIS IS GREAT

HECK

HOW’S THIS GOING TO END I’M SCREAMIGN

I’M SO AFRAID OF THAT CIRCLET RIGHT THERE

NO

THIS CURSE THING FR PULLING ABSOLUTELY NO PUNCHES

THE FLASHES OF THE CIRCLET DUDE HECK

A H ???

OH MY GODS???

I’M GONNA CRY????

THE AO LEI??

WALKING PAST??

HAND ON HIS SHOULDER??

AND THEN IT’S MEI

TALKIGN

YEAH HECK

OH MY GODS THIS FR

YEAH

YEAH I’MA CRY FR

FAKING IT TILL WE MAKING IT SO YOU BETTER BE TAKIN IT S O N

TH

HECK

HECK DUDE

THIS IS KILLING ME

THE

LOOK

L O O K

ITS THE CREW

IN THEIR NEXT LIFE

AND THE HANDS ON MONKEY KINGS SHOUDLERS

THIS IS KILLING ME FR

GET EM BOIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

OH MAN COLOURFUL MOMENT

OH B R U H

HARBENGOR OF CHAOS??

HELLO??

STOP TALKIGN

SO TRUE

GET EM

WELP THERE HE IS

THERE HE ISSSSSSSSSS

MONKEEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

OH THAT’S BEAUTIFUL

THEN PROVE US WRONG

THAT

Y’KNOW

WHAT

THAT DOLOGUE IS SO GOOD

AND PIGSY “TAHT’S MY BOY!”

THIS IS GREAT

OH BOY

NO

KILL HIM

BITES

GRRGGRGGRR SUS MAN

GET EM

GET RID OF HIM

SUS LION

EAT THIS SUCKAH

HE’S JUST STANDING THERE I PAUSED IT I WANT HIM GONE PLEASE DONT’ BE EVIL I THINK YOU’RE AT LEAST GONNA CALL MK A MONSTER OR OSMETHING HECK

YEAH STANIDNG PROTECTIVELY

ME

SNAP

HECK BACK OFF NOOOOO

MONKEEEYYYYYY

MONKEY KING

DID HE JUST SNATCH MONKEY KING

HE JUST SNATCHED HECKING MNKEY KING

YEAH HEY JERKFACE BRING THE MONKEY BACKJ

HECK YOU GUYS I DIDNT’ THINK WE’D GET ANY MONKEY KING CLIPS BUT WE DID

HECK JUST

THE WAY HE APPROACHED MK WITH THE LIEK “YOU SEEM TO BE DOING FINE RIGHT?” JUST

HECK

DUDE

WORRIED BUT NERVOUS FEARFUL LAUGHIGN YOU’RE FINE RIGHT?

THAT JSUT HECK MAN

HECK

DUDE

WHAT THE CRAP

AND THIS IS ONLY EP 7???

THIS FEELS LIKE AN EP TEN

OH MY HECK HECKGLFSDFM

OKAY THAT WAS A LOT

I LIKED THE DIOLOGUE BETWEEN MK AND INK MK

HECK

THE

A LOT OF THAT WOULD BE HIS THOGUHTS

AND THEN THE INK MK BEING OKAY AND JUST “then prove us wrong” BECAUSE MK

HECK

EHCK I’M HAVING THOUGHTS ABOTU THAT EBING MK’S INTERNAL DIOLOGUE TO HIMSELF ITS FINE

THE WHOLE JTTW CREW MAKING AN APPERANCE, THE AO LEI BIT REALLY GOT ME HE’S SO WONDERFUL AND SWISHY AND LIVES IN MEI PROBABLY HECKIGN REINCARNATION STUFF AND I’M IN PIECES AND I ADORE HIM AND HER AND THEM AND EVERYONE AND JUST HECK THIS REALLY DOES MAKE THE SAMADHI FIRE BIT HIT JUST AS HARD AS I THOUGHT IT DID WITH WUKONG LOOKING UP AND MEI YELLING AND FEELING LIKE THAT’S AO LEI YELLIGN CAUSE THEIR DRAGONS LOOK SIMIALR AND THAT’S TENCICALLY HIM IN THE NEXT LIFE AND ALL THIS HECKING STUFF I’M FINE Y’ALL I’M ALL GOOD THERE WSA SO MUCH THAT HAPPENED IN THIS ONE

THE CIRCLET BIT

YOU GUYS THE CIRCLET THAT BETTER NOT SHOW UP AGAIN I SWEAR

THEY FR WENT THROUGH ALL THAT TO GET THEIR FRIENDS AND MONKEY KIGN OUT AND THEN HE JUST GETS SUCKED RIGHT BACK INTO IT BY HECKIGN AZUE PIECE OF CRAP SQUARE UP YOU BRAIDED JADED LOSER I’LL FIGHT YOU MYSELF

THE FACT DESTINY CONTINUES TO BE A THING THROUGHOUT ALL THIS AND THE LIKE DEFYING DESTINY AND THE ECHOS OF LBD AND THE FEARS OF HSI FRIENDS THINKING HE’S A MONSTER AND WILL TURN ON HIM AND SEEING THE FRIENS SQUARE OF AGAINST INK HIM WOULD MAKE IMAGING THAT SO MUCH EASIER AND THE FLICKING INBETWEEN HIMSELF AND MONKEY HIMSELF AND WUKONG STAYING CLOSE TO MK AND SHEILDING HIM AND HTE MONKEY MK (heck I’m gonna make a couple monkey edits right away to at least give him an one his face looks so empty hgslk;fjsadf) AND THE SLOW MO BIT WHEN HE’S DIVING AND HOW HECKING BEAUTIFUL THAT LOOKS I DESPERATELY NEED TIO USE THIS IN AN AMV OF SOME KIND HECK AND HTEN HE’S BACK TO FLICKERING THEN HECKING AZURE *STABS HIM STABS HIM STABS HIM STABS HIM* WUKONG IMMEDEATLEY SHEILDING MK AND THE CREW FROM THIS GUY, THE LIP CURLED DISGUISTED LOOK ON AZURES FACE SHUT UP DUDE SHOVE UR FACE IN THE DIRT, WUKONG LOOKING BACK PANCKED I AM NOT OKAY, MK FLICKERING AND THEN MEI TAKING MONKEY KINGS PLACE SHEILDING MK IMMEDEATELY BECAUSE THEY ALL KNOW THIS DUDE’S SKETCHY AS HECK BUT MK STILL DOESN’T KNOW WHATS GOING ON AND HECK HECK EHCKE HECK ARE THEY OUT OF THE SCROLL NOW? IT LOOKS LIKE THEY’RE OUT OF THE SCROLL, MONKEY KINGS STILL IN THERE THE BRUH WANTS TO KEEP HIM TRAPPED AND TAKE HIM SOMEWHERE OR SOMETHING DOESN’T HE AAAAAAA STABS HIM STABS HIM STABS HIM, SQUARE UP LION FACE, FACE MY WRATH YOU BLUE GUMBALL- OKAY

OKAY

WE’RE GOOD WE’RE FINEEEEEEE I’M GONNA LOSE MY MIND NEXT WEEK HUH, THIS IS EP 7 THERE’S THREE MORE LEFT HECK, OKAY OKAY, WATCHING IT WITH MY BROS AND LOSING IT WITH THEM IG, I’M HAVING A MOMENT WE COOL WE CHILL TTYL KNOX OUT

#knox reacts #lmk s4 spoilers #lmk s4 english #MY GOSH #I'M GONNA BE LOSING IT FOR A WHILE IG

[acorpsecalledcorva]

Issue I'm dealing with right now is a great example of why I hate people who push the "DID isn't a disorder it's an uwu quirky super power" idea. (Obviously no shade to those who view their own system hood as a net gain but I see people treat 'disorder' or 'maladaptive' as dirty words in general and I find it really demeaning to those who do struggle, myself included obviously, as though it's just a matter of perspective and I just need to turn that frown upside down 🙃)

TW for needle stuff under the cut

So being trans and chronically ill, I have to get blood tests, like, a lot of blood tests. I also use estradiol injections as my primary HRT method. So needless to say, needles are a huge part of my life and healthcare. A couple years ago this was completely fine, I just stare off into space for a 20-30 seconds and it's over before I know it. I dissociate. Very useful skill, been great all my life yay no fear of needles I'm a big girl with my big girl sticker (bandaid).

The last couple years however, things started to go a bit wonky, I've started to pass out during blood tests. I'm fine I'm fine I'm fine and then suddenly the lights go out and I come to with a very apologetic and worried nurse. This led to one hospital visit where I needed to get several tests and so they put a cannula in my arm. Oh boy my brain did not like that solution, my wolf alter fronted and needed to be actively prevented from ripping it out with her teeth.

With my estradiol injections however, something different started happening. I do them weekly on the same day, Thursday, and first I would keep "forgetting" to do them. No Biggie, though, would just do it the first opportunity I remembered to. Then, I started drinking. Every Thursday, without fail, I would remember to do my shot and realise I've been drinking alcohol without even thinking of it. I was getting sabotaged.

Then last week, things got stepped up a gear. After administering my shot it hurt much more than usual. The next day, my jeans waistband was pressing on the bruise(?) and rather than just feeling ow, I started panicking. Every time I would move in a way that hurt it I would instantly be filled with dread. Dread that I had been stabbed and was going to pop my stitches.

Then, as if that wasn't enough, I've been having nightmares about needles getting stuck in my veins and needing to squeeze them out like zits.

So why is all this happening? Because of the dissociation. My brain relied so heavily and readily on dissociation as a coping mechanism for all this needle business, that it became a trauma. All those repeated chronic minor routine events, by not being integrated due to such an inherent tendency to dissociate are bouncing around in my subconscious and upsetting the system.

As such, protectors and persecutors are getting royally pissed off, because it keeps happening, and I keep doing it to myself. They're screaming out at me to stop doing this absolutely horrendous horrible life threatening thing because being mostly locked inside they don't actually understand why I need to do it. They don't care about the outside world, they just care that I'm repeatedly triggering parts of the system and want it to not happen anymore.

This is so endlessly frustrating for me, because I had no issue with needles whatsoever. Everyone else I know who has issues with needles gets exposure therapied into being fine, but for me? I get new trauma from things that shouldn't and wouldn't have been traumatic if it wasn't for my brain operating on automatic responses.

So yeah, fuck dissociation, all my brain homies hate dissociation and I'll bite the next person I see saying that it's inherently a positive force for good in everyone's lives that does it.

#sysblr #system community #actually did #system things #did system #actually traumatised #trauma vent

[moonjxsung]

hi bb! how are you?

i got an iced coffee & brownie (there was no cheesecake😪) at my local coffee shop in ur honor🫶🏻 bc i’ve had such a busy week with uni, so i treated myself.

i failed in taking a pic of my pc with the coffee😪

did you watch ji’s new reel? truly the ace of kpop😍

i’m going to the vet tomorrow for tofu’s next checkup so i’ll update you! (she’s got the cone of shame now bc she kept touching her eye and she hates it😂)

i love you sm bb, i hope you’re having a great week💜

-🐈‍⬛

HIIIIII BBYYYYY I love how we’re all getting our little iced coffee & pastry treats this week SOOO DESERVED 🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶 I hope your week is going so good my angel!!!!

I DID SEE JI’S NEW REEL…… the way I screamed…. I just love how his instagram is for posting covers like he’s just so passionately in love with music and now he has an outlet to post whatever he wants 😭 I’m so proud of him he’s just so talented in every single thing he does

ALSO DID YOU SEEEEEE ONEW IS BACK 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 WARRRR IS OVERRRRRRR 🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶 I was taking a nap when he finally posted about it and my sister called me SCREAMING about the news, we cried so much and spent the entire day listening to Onew and Shinee I AM SOOOOO HAPPY I WAS NOTTTT EXPECTING IT 😭 his agency also posted that we can finally send fan mail so I’m going shopping this weekend with my sister so put together a FAT package of gifts and letters for him 🫶 I really want to buy us matching necklaces or rings or something like yeahhh this is my matching necklace w Onew from Shinee. no biggie ! I just can’t believe it I’m so excited for more Onew stuff FINALLYYYYY it’s so good to see him in good health and to know we’re gonna get Shinee ot4 content again soon (and ot5 forever in spirit🫶) what a blessing from the universe 👼

Good luck at Tofu’s appointment bby!!!! Keep me posted what happens!! Cone of shame 😭😭 my cat was SO bad w her cone of shame I wear it never stayed on for more than an hour at a time bc she would just rip it off RRJRJRJDJS it was so annoying 😭

(I love u bby I hope this week is good to you!!!!! 👼🥹🫶💞💝💘💖)

#🐈‍⬛ anon #ask

[hilarychuff]

20 questions for fic writers

tagged by @2btheanswertothequestion. ty for thinking of me!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

rn i have 23 but i have number 24 going up soon 😈

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

202,248

3. What fandoms do you write for?

rn i'm in my chrissy cunningham phase (stranger things) but i'm still in my overarching sansa stark phase (asoiaf). i have been known to do a rewatch and dip back into my jemma simmons phase (agents of shield). and i'll always sort of be in my lily evans phase (marauders).

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

i carry it in mine (asoiaf, jon/sansa canonish soulmate au)

all the best people see you (all the best people know) (stranger things, chrissy/robin s4 au)

i remember (i remember) (asoiaf, jon/sansa canon drabble)

in any world (in any way) (asoiaf, sansa-centric au graphics collection)

the royal records (asoiaf, jon princess diaries au)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

usually!! i really like getting comments and i guess i have assumed that having someone respond incentivizes them so i always want to incentivize comments!! i think it is i polite to say thank you also. and i mean i love to talk about my fic so i'm always like "oh y'all tryna chat????" but usually nobody is trying to chat back ahhahaha. sometimes i hide from comments if i'm feeling guilty about not updating something but i always appreciate comments and they're usually p motivating to me

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

hmmm. most of my fics are like alternate media-based au concepts or lil oneshots or stories that are yet to have endings, so hard to say exactly which is angstiest.

i think my angstiest story is a pre-hydra reveal agents of shield one i did as a secret santa for someone where fitz was dead(?!!?!?) and grant ward showed up to bring jemma simmons back to the team and that was yeaaaaars ago but whenever i think of it i'm always like ok wow i hope that is what that person wanted. what bold choices to make in a gift for a stranger!!

other than thaaat i do think of i carry it in mine as a fairly angsty fic but it's intended to have a not so angsty ending so

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

well please trust that any princess diaries or miss congeniality au is going to end up with the main ship getting together, presumably happily for the rest of their lives!! desert hearts (aka all the best people see you all the best people know) is heading towards a happy ending. howl (sansa-centric scream au) i think will have roughly as happy an ending as any horror movie final girl can hope for.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

ummmm not really. i definitely have but the only time it felt like anything other than a one-off was when i essentially started tumblr beef by wandering into the wrong tag. and that was not fun and people were hating on their own blogs for a min BUT it died down and nobody really went out of their way to bother me directly about it after that, so it was not ideal but it was fine. tagging etiquette is tricky!!

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

hmmmmmmmm historically no. but i have outlined smut!! and i'm thinking about actually writing some maybe even soon!! it's interesting bc i've discussed smut with friends and edited for them and used to roleplay and write smut scenes and that all felt fine but i haven't yet wrapped my head around the idea of being like "this is my little smut scene i made up all by myself and now i'm broadcasting it to the masses." feels like i'm opening myself up to psychoanalysis!! but also maybe once i actually write the smut scene i'll be like oh. no biggie. ok post. so we'll see hahahahah

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

not crossovers in the traditional sense but crossovers in the sense that i pick up my little blorbos and cast them in other tv shows/movies/etc, yes, constantly.

i mentioned howl above but i love that one, my sansa-centric scream au. i love jon snow mia thermopolis princess diaries hahahahah. i think it's cute and funny. i love using robin and chrissy from stranger things to make miss congeniality gay. the fic i'm posting in a few days for the stranger things rare pair big bang is also about robin and chrissy in a lil reality tv verse, so that one is really fun and silly and sweet too i think.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

i don't think so! the only time anything like this has happened to me was like a tumblr rp blog misunderstanding a long time ago.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

no but that would be cool!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

no but i started writing mainly through role playing! so that was co-writing just in a different sense, and i miss that. it's also just really fun to talk about ideas and stuff with friends and then not always actually have to write them. i do play around with concepts a lot with @mistysharks and @beholdthemem for chrissy and the stranger things teen crew, and @cellsshapedlikestars and i also help each other brainstorm sansa and jon related asoiaf stuff which i always super appreciate

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

i'm more of a favorite ship per fandom kind of gal than a favorite ship over all, but i'm also a multishipper in that i can kind of get into my main blorbos with anyone. i'm super still in my chrissy phase rn and i love writing her with robin, but also in a lil steve/chrissy/eddie ot3. that said i feel like i mainly read hellcheer!!

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

i hope it doesn't surprise anyone to hear that i DO have designs to finish i carry it in mine!! and howl. and desert hearts. like i have specific enough endings in mind that i am working towards for all of those.

the wip that i wish i could finish but know i never will is my marauders mediator series au based on the meg cabot books where lily can talk to ghosts and james is a ghost. i started writing it like back in 2015!! and then even started rewriting it in 2020. and i still love it. but it would be a big project to take on and one that would take a lot more work to figure out, let alone just write, and i don't really see it happening. that said i will always love it!!!

i also started a resurrection au marauders story where lily etc all start coming back to life when harry is like 24 so seven years after the end of the books, and i always thought the like emotional drama in that was so slay too. but the resurrection show itself never really had good answers for the paranormal plot/how it would play out and so i didn't have anything to crib off of lmao. and i never really invested much thought into figuring it out myself iirc. so i never really knew like plotwise where i wanted it to go so much as i was just like "how would the characters react if this happened" but i did like that thought exercise. maybe i would've written more if it would've felt like that would be satisfying to read for other people without actual like. plot.

16. What are your writing strengths?

ummm i'm really interested in like. character profiles. so i think i tend to gravitate towards that sort of story personally. a character figuring themselves/what they want out.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

low key i just like almost never write physical description stuff into my stories?? like it's all fanfiction so i'm like ok first of all you already know what everybody looks like. it takes a lot more active effort for me to be like. does the reader need to know what the character looks like right now?? does the reader need to have a clear vision of where the characters are?? what the room looks like?? i could probably afford to do that more but i find that i tend to skip it a lot

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

hmmm i really only have one fic where that might apply i think. i'd probs try to do it minimally bc i wouldn't want to do a bad job but if it's just one line i could see myself just, you know, doing google translate if i don't know a speaker i can run it by

19. First fandom you wrote for?

harry potter!! i found my way to marauders era pretty quick.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

i have a lot of love and tenderness in my heart for desert hearts and i carry it in mine. so far those are like my heart-squeezey fics imo. but i also love howl!!! a combination of some of my favorite interests and stories. i feel like these are my main three wips too so i gotta just keep tinkering away until a new chapter falls out. hopefully sooner than later for desert hearts and i carry it in mine, which i have in fact been reorganizing a lil lately!!

anyway!!

ty again for the tag @2btheanswertothequestion!! if you want to do this: @cellsshapedlikestars @mistysharks @beholdthemem @chdarling

#my writing #my fics #tag meme

[just-jordie-things]

i dont know if you were asked this before, sorry if i am bothering you! Do you have any writing tips? I don't have anything specific but just any in general. I really admire your work!

you're so sweet!! i feel like i'm the last person who should be giving writing advice as i just blindly go into a brainrot induced stupor and spout off into docs as if i'm screaming into the void-- i have been asked this before but it's no trouble to copy it!! <3

a biggie take your time finding your style- as you can see on my masterlist i have a looot of shit on there from years of writing fanfic and experimenting. getting out of my comfort zone can be kinda hard for me personally, but with writing it was so worth it bc you can really see a metamorphosis there of when i was writing just to write and when i was writing with a drive.

don’t be afraid to ignore the rules of grammar. run on sentences are beautiful. i’ve found that especially so when the plot is driven by someone’s stream of consciousness as though they’re narrating it. thoughts are messy, they’re long and sometimes awkward and there’s no such thing as grammar in your mind !! of course spelling and punctuation are important and i’d recommend editing tho (idk her 😳) but get creative with it!!

thesaurus.com is my bestie 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩 i often find myself using a lot of the same words and i don’t want to bore readers with repetitiveness! and also it’s just an easy way to expand my vocabulary too. (in person i stammer and have the reach of a fourth grader lmfao so i always want my writing to be concise and make the reader feel exactly what i want them to with my language)

also something i’ve started doing recently !! when i’m away from my wip and daydream about it, i write it down right away! in my notes app or on sticky notes or even my hand hehe. sure if it’s a significant enough plot point i’ll probably remember… but there’s no time like the present!! i want A to look at B a little differently in that one quick scene? i want to make them eat something different for foreshadowing? little details like that can be huge in your writing !! something a reader might gloss over but then realize later it was all a part of a greater scheme?? yes. so take note of those thoughts and daydreams you have !! even if you don’t end up adding it to your work, it’s better than having a profound, fic changing idea that you forget before you get the chance to write it!

this one is simple but a biggie- think about what you would want to read. i’ve been trying to keep this in mind as of late, especially when writing longer pieces where i want to make y’all suffer. find new ways to build the tension in your plot. give us different points of view, give us an untrustworthy narrator that thinks they’ve got it all figured out. throw in extra conflict. fanfiction is the melting pot of whatever the fuck you want !! so go stupid go crazy and make it something you love, and you should be good to go!! not to be cheesy but as long as you love it then you’re solid. doing something you love over and over will naturally lead you through growth and finding your style. don’t be wrapped up in notes right away (yes it can be a bit of an issue on this app- but none of has have control over how people enjoy your work- so you might as well focus on enjoying it for yourself) because as long as you’re doing something you’re passionate about and sharing it with us, more people will soon flock to enjoy it with you <3

lastly i just enjoy making mini playlists for whatever i’m currently working on. they don’t have to correlate completely with your plot. sometimes the sound of a beat is good enough for me to throw it on. if it gets me excited and planning out scenes i haven’t gotten to yet then it’s good enough for me!! i will listen to the same song on repeat in the name of ✨vibes✨ even if the words themselves have nothing to do with the plot i’m writing. that’s probably lazy basic advice but it works well for me and i love listening to music so !!

hopefully the copying of a previous ask isn't annoying and ya find this helpful! just my thoughts and processes tho, you gotta find a style that's best for you! and remember its a hobby. if you get stressed take a break and come back later! you're on your own schedule, and you don't owe anyone anything, so just have fun!

#jordie says stuff

[aahsokaatano]

I havent heard about the songbird! Can we get that story?

Lmao yes of course

So when I was about... probably 7 or 8? My mom and I went to the Cleveland Zoo.

For context, I grew up going to the much smaller zoo that was closer to my hometown, and that is the one that I still remember with the most fondness (especially that summer zoo camp program that you and I did together one year, that was super fun!). But the Cleveland Zoo wasn't too far away, all things considered - just a few hours by car. And it's got a bunch of things that the local zoo did not have.

Such as an aviary.

The aviary is the ONLY thing I remember about that trip - actually it's the only thing I remember about the Cleveland Zoo in general even though I'm fairly certain I went there more than once, but this memory blotted out literally everything else surrounding the Cleveland Zoo.

So in the aviary, at least when I went there as a child, you were given a little cup of... food of some kind? I THINK it was like. Nectar/sugar water, and was for the hummingbirds, but it might have been seeds? There may have been a selection of both. I legitimately do not remember the contents. I just remember crushing that paper cup in my hand while screeching in pain.

But I'm getting ahead of myself.

See, this little trip happened in the fall - probably on a teacher work day or something, when I was out of school, and after the family business from the previous story had closed for the season so my mom was free. And during the previous summer, I had been allowed to get my ears pierced. I didn't have a lot of earrings at the time, so I was mostly still wearing the piercing pair.

Which were little studs with pale blue balls - they looked pretty similar to this

Now. The Cleveland Zoo aviary has a lot of birds flying around freely. And they know that people have food, because pretty much every person walks in with one of those little cups.

I very clearly remember having a delightful time watching birds land on my hand to eat out of the little cup, flitting around my mom and I because we were pretty much the only people in there other than a zookeeper.

I felt a bird land on my shoulder. No biggie.

I felt a sudden SEARING PAIN in my earlobe.

The little shit on my shoulder had seen my earrings and decided "oh that is very food-shaped" and BIT ME. And when I screamed and jerked my head, it decided to HANG ON.

This was about the point where I reflexively crushed the little paper cup that all of the polite birds were eating out of and scared them off. But not the asshole on my shoulder, oh no, it decided that it was actually a bulldog and was going to hang on to my ear for all it was worth.

So now I'm flipping out, my mom is trying to shoo it off and making no progress, the zookeeper runs over and is trying to help my mom and is also making no progress, and the bird is still absolutely convinced that if it just holds on long enough, that tiny bit of painted metal will magically turn into an edible seed.

The zookeeper finally whapped the bird a few times with her walkie-talkie and it decided that my earrings weren't worth that sort of nonsense and let go, flying off without a care in the goddamn world

I wasn't bleeding or anything, but my earlobe was noticeably swollen for several days after the fact, and I have a probably lifelong fear of small birds now

Hawks? Eagles? Vultures? Herons? Cool.

Sparrows and finches and robins? Can fuck RIGHT off.

I don't even wear earrings anymore and my piercings have long since closed but I still don't trust those little shits.

#avidreaderffn #max answers #tales from the hill

[remindingpersephone]

Returning With Randomness

Good morning, my darlings. My Tumblr mini-break has resulted in me changing the way I utilize the blue hellsite. I'm putting all this babbling under a jump to keep your scrolling aesthetically pleasing.

14 days isn't much of a break, but I was testing out a theory. I felt like I was checking social media, or at least the 4 Biggies: Facebook, Tumblr, Twitter, Instagram, too frequently and in too automated a fashion. Got five minutes between tasks? Check Insta! Need a breather from spreadsheet madness? Log in to Twitter! And on and on. While it is always nice to check in with my mutuals, I would then get sidetracked and the next things I know I've lost 20 minutes to somebody's thread about SCOTUS or lunar eclipse or whatever. Not terrible, in and of itself, but when added to all the other noise and distraction in the world, it has become detrimental.

Life offline these days is busy and stressful. My job is good but hectic, so I have to stay focused and disciplined with my time and attention. Home life is difficult and I'll leave it at that because it involves other people who don't want their shit aired out online. So even if I wanted to read about the latest Kardashian drama (keep your mitts of Marilyn's dress, Kim!) I just don't have the time or the mental bandwidth.

Moreover, reading gossip and useless opinions just isn't good for my mental health. I'd argue it's not good for anyone's mental health, but I believe everyone has to the right to live their life any way they see fit, including but not limited to social media brainrot. You do you, baby.

Which brings me to my point (I have one, I swear): social media may have been an unfortunate mistake. Or at least, 75% of it. The 25% that allows us to meet each other, learn new things, talk to people around the world, share, connect, inspire, is awesome. A truly wonderful gift. But the other 75%: rampant disinformation, bullying, repeated ugliness, echo chamber effect - is an awfully high price to pay. Is it too high? I don't know. I think we need to recognize it now, acknowledge the problem it has become, and find a way to preserve the good and eliminate the bad. There has to be a way. Our society has done some amazing things. We have to find a way to keep trolls from ruining the world.

I think it was @hopefulmisanthrope who said a while back "Do we really need everyone's opinion?" in regards to social media's negative effect. I found myself repeating this sentiment a few days ago. I told someone "We don't need everyone's opinion, all the time."

I must clarify that there is a difference between using Twitter or Tumblr, etc. to express yourself, and using it to spread maliciousness. Use it to write something silly or sad or moving or beautiful. To just put something out into the universe. I wholeheartedly support this for everyone. Remember, a thing isn't free unless it's free for everyone. So follow your bliss and post your heart out if it brings you joy. God knows, I've posted about meaningless shit before, because it made me happy. I just posted on Twitter about wind, for fuck's sake. I'm not contributing to the overall betterment of society with my 479th Instagram picture of orchids. But neither am I harming it buy doing this. It's the thousand mile long thread of echoed hatred and ignorance that worries me. That's the shit we've got to stop. It is not a case of, "Well, who's to say what's hate and what's not?" We are. We all know the difference between what is evil and vicious and what is harmless. I want the people that scream freedom as a way to absolve themselves of responsibility for the things they say and do to shut their mouths. Adults know when they are protecting true freedom and when they are using it to mask discrimination and acrimony.

So, to get back to my original thought when I started writing this post a hundred years ago, is to say that I want to use Tumblr differently. I want to check in on my mutuals by going to their individual blogs. I want to write my own posts when I either have something to capture so I can refer back to it later, or because I want to share something. I don't want to start scrolling mindlessly, miss all the good stuff, while zoning out. So if I don't appear for a while and then suddenly heart bomb the hell out of you, this is why. And if I miss you and you wonder why, drop me a line. I do check messages to see if anyone is trying to reach me directly.

Everything is tumultuous (to put it mildly) in the world these days. I'm looking for ways to maintain equilibrium with my energy, attention, and output. I am responsible for what I allow myself to absorb, and what I put out into the universe. I want both of those to be good, healthy and helpful. So the learning and the adjusting and the analyzing and the changing and the growing never stops. Neither does my rambling, apparently. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I love you, kittens. Take care of yourselves and be good to each other.

#tl:dr #responsible social media usage #sunday rambling

[munadrawson]

Commentary on the "Pardner" project

Before I mention the musical number project, fair warning that this will get personal. I worked on this project during the month of Ramadan when I could not leave home, which resulted in some mental anguish. But I won't get into details since it is pretty much self-explanatory if you're queer. FYI: This is long af. Lots to say.

Background:

I've been drawing fan illustrations/fan comics for 15 years. I never once reference anything from my cultural background. Wild, I know. One of the reasons why I have yet to do so until now was that there wasn't a desi-inspired character that I would enjoy as much as Frye, especially from a franchise that I had adored since day one when I was broke and just started college. There was no way 17 years old me would believe an inkling idol with a Desi background would be a thing and not be offensive. I know some voiced their issues with Frye's design, but after looking through the art book, I am GLAD this was the design they approved. I won't talk about colorism/racism in this post. Don't want to get into the social issues. This is a representation that I'm okay with, and it is a positive one.

So, I grew up watching musicals, whether it is from Disney or Bollywood/other box-office desi movies. Music is a pretty biggie dealie for yours truly. Gosh, I remember in elementary/grade school, I had a classmate who had the same energy as Frye and did the teeth thing as she brought a tape to school. She shared "Lal Dupatta" with the homeroom teacher on the school CRT tv. She was dancing and singing along with the song and tried to have me join in the festivity. But I was and am a shy girl, so I couldn't do it. I did enjoy her enthusiasm and the song. This was something I culturally understood. I felt connected.

Reminiscing that moment, I declared that I should reference one musical number that would fit in the Splatoon universe. For her sake and mine.

Old musical number:

One rule I had while I was searching for a song was that I didn't want the song to be too culturally specific or ignorant of stereotypes. So, no dancing. In the future, I'll draw Deep Cut dancing but nothing culturally significant until I do some well-deserving research before flinging myself into the fiery pits of hell. I learned my lesson internet, lol.

I had one specifically in mind before the partner song. More romantic implications, but it had one person singing. No duet. Sure, BM would appear more, but it would be just him playing an instrument while Shiver singing. Then I would have them crashing together while Frye witnessed this whole shebang at a distance. I also planned to add the Squidbeak Squad be the peanut gallery and have Craig do the "Harold, they're gay" joke. That was the initial idea until I stumbled upon a better one.

New musical number:

After eating my dinner, I passed by my mother while she watched Sholay. During that time, Mom was watching movies from the 60s and 70s on youtube. One was nostalgia, and the other was missing out on some or does not remember some of the stories. Sholay, particularly, caught my attention because the silver fox daddy, Sanjeev Kumar, appeared on the screen. Rood af, bruv. I know, thirst trap.

Seeing him in this movie triggered a memory where Dad showed me a motorcycle scene. I remember Kishore Da was the singer for that song, but that scene was from a different movie. A similar concept of two buddies riding on a motorcycle together, but the energy wasn't there. Out of curiosity, I ended up watching Sholay with Mom.

After viewing the friendship song, I shot up with excitement. "THIS! This one screams them!" As I initially said in the main post, I sought that chaotic energy. Two morally good-leaning thieves sing in a duet about their friendship while being a menace to society. That's THEM!

I know BM is an essential member of Deep Cut, but I'm not considering the movie but this specific score. If this project was about the movie, I would have DJ Octavio as Silver Fox Daddy, and BM would be Shiver's romantic interest. I did have plans on doing so in a separate post, but I gave up on that thought because I became exhausted after drawing eight pages of Fryver. I thought this would take me at least three weeks to draw. Instead, it was more than a month! I couldn't continue because of the lack of going to the gym, a month's worth of fasting, and in the middle of the holy month, I got sick from a stomach virus. Sorry BM. I want to tackle some other projects right now, and as promised, there will be more of him.

4 became 6, then 7, and finally 8:

Initially, I had the project divided into four pages. These were the four:

While drawing the four, I debated whether I should add in the coin toss scene. At that time, I could not figure out who could fill the village girl role until I was gobsmacked, realizing how slow and stupid I could be. I thought BM for the longest time, but he's too nice. If the coin rejects the idea of sleeping, he will give them the signature bear hug instead of waddling away. I want these two to be dunked on, especially after stealing his icy pop. "I'm upset that the dastardly duo stole my ice cream, but FRIENDS!!!" That kind of energy is NOT needed for this goof.

Once I figured out that the cousins could fill the Village girl role, the project became six pages long. I left that as a bonus. I acknowledge some people ship each of the cousins with Shiver/Frye. I nodded in some parts, like Callie's blushing. Hopefully, this bonus one was respectful enough. I didn't want to offend anyone.

At this point, I was confident that I was done until I realized there was no introduction to this project. Who the hell would know this 48-year-old movie reference? Very few. Which is fine. I don't know many pop cultural references. If you mention something about star wars, I would go whomst. Not a musical? Disengage, lol. I am not a movie buff to begin with. Music (folk metal plz) and (indie) games I fuck with. Anyway, I drew the introduction to the sketch dump:

I've laid the chorus across on the top. The background is straight out of the game (you got me bent sideways if you expected me to draw a unique background. Like, I'm insane, but not THAT insane.) I drew the characters that appeared in the sketch dump. These three stealing the show. How the hell did I draw this in one go?:

Damn, this hand. They're too cute for any school.

After, I've drawn the introduction. Surely, at this point, I'm done with this project. Nope. There is no conclusion. Can't have an introduction without a conclusion. Gotta include an ending. So, I contemplated. While doing that, I cleaned up some of the sketches, and I shared a part of the WIP with my partner, jokingly stating:

She was right. To close this project, it's literally sealed with a kiss. Why didn't I think of that?! Maybe because I assume they ARE together.

Despite being romantic, I often don't draw two characters kissing. I drew four kisses, including this one, within 15 years of actively drawing. I guess either I'm not confident at drawing that, or it's not a huge part of my love language. Also, it can't help when your girl towers over you. Usually, it's me receiving not giving. I need to carry a ladder around to kiss, lol.

At last, I drew the kiss. And boi, isn't it dramatic, huh? Nonetheless, It's thematic. I can finally close this project for good...? *Nervously laughing* There's more coming.

Additional Thoughts:

Fryver: If they're partners in crime, then they gotta gay equally. I made sure both of them had their moment in the spotlight. For example, in the coin toss scene, I initially had Frye flipping the coins. But, after drawing four pages where Frye leads some parts more than Shiver. Break the role and have Shiver take charge in this scene.

It works well, especially Shiver using their hand as a fan while simultaneously displaying the coins. This was before the art book! Pure coincidence that a character I finalized happens to like counting money in their pass time. This entire time, I thought BM was the money person. Big Man, big money. Naw, it's your local octoling, Shiver! Also, Frye doing the ;d with a tooth sticking out, giving a thumbs up. Great. Love to see it.

Big Man: Before the introduction page, BM only appeared once in the "MY ICECREAM" scene. This was drawn after the introduction:

The idea of having BM playing the trumpet while he perches on top of a moving truck, it's fucking hilarious. He rather not risk his life whenever either of the two operates a vehicle, but he's okay with playing incidental music on the roof of a stranger's car. Sure, buddy. You do you, lol. Squid Sisters: I have a project I want to do about the cousins. I am still determining how long that will take, but it's pretty long. I want to start something small.

This was my first time drawing them. I've drawn the other idols. Although chibi Marina should not count as adequately drawn. I do have an Off the Hook comic I want to work on. First, I need to write the script!

This was the first panel I drew before I worked on the other panels. This is basically my sister and me whenever we encounter someone we don't like or don't have the energy to engage. Lil sis will give her signature fake smile, and I'll give a stank look. No mask, no filter. I'm glad I could capture the dichotomy of the cousins in a single frame.

Final Thoughts:

There were moments when I wanted to give up entirely on this project. Negative thoughts such as, "No one would bat an eye at this," repeatedly. But as a perfectionist, I hate unfinished work. My work specifically. I persevered by telling myself, "Just do it for yourself."

It was a good drawing exercise. I want to get better at drawing these characters. Get to know and understand them better. I've abandoned trying to draw in Splatoon's anatomical proportions. Not my style, lol.

I'm happy that I drew the kiss. After sketching, yes sketching, seven pages, I was exhausted. I got sick in the middle of the fasting, unable to leave home because of fasting. It was too much (it's a good thing, I work remotely from home.) BUT. It's not gay, ya know. I'VE got to draw the SMOOCH. Or else this project will be trapped in the "gal pals" limbo. Also, not me struggling to NOT be wed to a cishet desi man. Anyone that is queer, plz.

Sigh. I had to draw this kiss secretly, away from my parents' prying eyes. I don't want them to question why I'm drawing two bipedal cephalopods kissing, let alone it being gay. And for whatever reason, they keep entering my office and staring at my monitors. I am a professional graphic designer, too. Let me work in peace!

Anyway, the kiss.

Honestly, talk about a mood. Especially when you're in a long-distance relationship. Five years in a romantic relationship and will be nine years in a platonic relationship with my partner in crime.

#Muna's Commentary #I'll be tagging commentaries just to keep things organized #That's the tag from now on #In case anyone is curious about my thought progress even if its zany shit like shitpostting

[hime-memes]

                         • Into The Spider Verse Soundtrack Starters • 

I was re-watching this movie the other night & remembered how good the soundtrack was. Here we are today, with a set of lyric starters ! Enjoy ! 

                   - Click the Song Titles to be redirected to a youtube™ video of them. –       As always: These have been modified for cohesive and sensical use for the general RPC. Feel free to change anything within these that you see fit to make it work for the receiver’s muse !     Recommended For: Any Muses/Plots/Timelines.

Trigger Warnings For: Violence & some mild language

‘ Elevate ‘ “ I had to get out all alone. “  " I’ll figure it out on my own. “ “ I know what I really want now. “ “ ... And now I see clear in HD ! “ “ I ain't got time to waste. “ “ They wanna fight ? I'm just gon' let 'em hate. “ “ You better choose a side -- ! “ “ You gotta choose a side ! “  “ You better do what's right, or you’re gonna lose the fight ! “ “ This is my arena ! “ “ I'm the black widow with a bad stinger -- “  “ I'll make you scream like a bad singer. “ “ I'm everything that you wanna be, plus more ! “ “ ... Since there's no heroes anymore ... “ “ Who’s the bad man that a man gotta bash on ? “ “ They will slander me -- I just plan to be somethin' powerful for my family. “ “ I tried to balance life and my sanity. “ “ How can I possibly act right ? “ “ I know you heard 'bout my last fight ! “ “ ‘ Cause I win, over and over again ! “ “ Fightin' my demons; I'm nice for a reason. “ “ My strength and my honor is trusted by children. “ “ I'm ready and willing to fight all these villains ... “ “ No chaos or killings -- my style is so brilliant ! “  “ I may have lost the battle, but I will not lose the war ! “  “ And, I did everything that I did on my own. “ “ Better talk to me nice; better watch your tone ! “  ‘ Way Up ‘ “ I went from boy to a man. “  “ My opposition had to stand down. “ “ ... And I had to make a perfect plan. “ “ I had to fight for the city. “ “ I had to fight for the people ! “ “ You gotta do what all leaders do ... “ “ Everyone here ? We believe in you ! “ “ We know you can be a hero, 'cause we’ve seen you do it ! “ “ Now, there's no villains allowed. “ “ The competition was lethal ! “ “ Honestly, it's no biggie. “ “ I had to do what all leaders do. “ ‘ Familia ‘ “ Father, father, unforgivable -- “ “ This is my house; you made it personal. “ “ It's always trouble when they go too far -- “ “ Nobody mention my familia. “ “ Father, father, could you bless his soul ? “ “ He’s talking crazy, I may lose control ! “ “ La lealtad vale más que el dinero ! “ // “ Loyalty is worth more than money ! “  “ Y yo me vo' a morir leal y nunca como un traicionero ... “ // “ And I'm going to die loyal and never as a treacherous ... “ “ Yo hasta doy la vida por mi familia ! “ // “ I’ll even give my life for my family ! “ “ ... Y que en paz descansen los que se mueren de envidia ... “ // “ ... And may those who die of envy, rest in peace ... “ “ Y en la familia no se falla, pero si te traicionan ... “ // “ and in the family you don't fail, but if they betray you ... “ “ No les das la espalda, tú lo ayuda' y perdona'. “ // “ You don't turn your back on them, you help him, ' and forgive '. “ La familia primero. ” // “ Family First. “ “ No lo compra el dinero ! “ // “ Money don't buy it ! “ “ Real hasta la muerte -- ! “ // “ Real until death ! “ “ Yo nunca vo' a traicionarte ... “ // “ I will never betray you ... “ “ Y si tú te cae yo mismo vo' a levantarte. “ // “ And if you fall ? I myself will get up ... “ ” Nobody pop off; nobody get murked ! “ “ Nobody scream, it'll prolly get worse ... “ “ Now I'm the curse -- this is my terse. “ “ Before I kill 'em, Imma torture them first ! “ " You about to need a prayer from a preacher. “ “ Eye of the tiger, faster than a cheetah -- ! “ “ Hop out the spider, then it's hasta la vista ! “ “ Now you’re a dead man for real. “ ‘ Hide ‘ ” Need a drink ? “ “ Really think I found my home -- Shorty make me feel at home. “ “ She made me leave the thrills at home & I'm fine with it ... “ “ She really made me lose control. “ “ Imma let my love unfold. “ “ We're just two lost souls, but we're fine with it. “ “ There's love at my front door ... short notice ! “ “ You're not like the same girls, I notice. “ “ Think I met my soul mate, and yeah -- I know it. “  “ When it gets dark outside; In you I confide. “ “ You help me face my demons. “ “ I won't hide ... “ “ Girls like you are hard to find ! “  “ I hope you don't mind, If I give you the time of your life ! “  “ Life is not the same -- “ “ Now that you're here ? I want nothing to change ! “  “ You pick me up when I'm down, look - I need you around. “ “ You’ve seen me through my darkest times ... “ “ You brought meaning to my life ! “ “ All because of you, I do right. “ “ Because of you, I have a purpose ! “ “ I fight for the world, because you're worth it. “ ‘ Scared of the Dark ‘ ” I'm not scared of the dark. “ “ No, I'm not afraid of the fall ... “ “ I'm not scared, not at all !  “  “ Why would a star ever be afraid of the dark ? “  “ I ain't never scared & I ain't never horrified. “ “ I just looked down at my Rolex, it said it's the darkest times. “ “ I ain't never terrified, I ain't never petrified. “  “ You know I see dead people, I just tell 'em, ‘ Get a life ‘ ! " “ Let me testify. “ “ I have never testified. “ “  I'm married to my pride. “  “ I got eyes like marbles; if I cry -- they sparkle ! “ “ You know I can read your mind like I'm the author. “ “ Take a deep sigh, it’s a sayōnara, I ain't afraid to die ... “ ” Okay, put my heart to the side. “ “ In my feelings, hey - let's ride. “ “ ‘ That’s my baby ! ‘, Boy, you crazy ! “  “ If only you count the tears I've cried ... “ “ A million times, I swear I've died ! “ “ I'm trying, but it's still not right -- “ ‘ Memories ‘ “ My memories came back in the form of someone else. “ “ I know this feelin', yes, I know this very well ! “  “ Why won't you love me now ? “ “ It's gon' take some gettin' used to. “ “ You feel the pain when it hits you. “ “ Don't you ever let them fool you ! “ “ ' Cause I know, that you know, that it ain't true. “ “ I learned the hard way about trust ... about us. “ “ We're not so stable anymore. “ “ What's left if I give you my all ? “ “ You stepped over me like a sidewalk. “ “ That's your loss ! “  “ You self-destruct and I watch. “ “ I can't deal with ya. “ “ I finally had enough. “

‘ Home ‘ “ I'm at war with their enforcement. “ “ Tryna fight for what's right and got sidetracked ... “ “ Where is your mind at ? ... ( Never mind that ! ) “  “ I stay with my brethren & pay for protection. “ “ I'm doing what's right and not askin' no questions. “ " I'm ready and waitin' for my day of salvation. “ “ I’m right where I belong now. “ “ They're looking for saviors. “ “ I'm looking for safety. “ “ I'm never gon' beg or plead. “ “ Say it out loud: Are you ready for war ? “ ‘ Start a Riot ‘ ” Who in here tryna start a riot ? “ “ That ain't no flyin' saucer ... “ “ You better just fix your posture ! “ “ And every hero needs his theme song, so -- “ “ You ain't got a chance, boy ... “ “ I thrown in everything but the kitchen sink ! “ “ I try to be friendly in the neighborhood. “ “ ... And here you come, all bargin' in ! “ “ ... All ugly like a brown fur cardigan ... “  “ I'm comin' through with my crew to make 'em pay ! “  “ I don't need no super suit, I'm feelin' brave ! “  “ Don't be a hero -- turn around & walk away ... “  “ Every day is like a sticky situation, when evil's lookin' for a chance ... “   “ We got the power in our hands ! “  ‘ Invincible ‘ “ I wanna feel like I can't come down ! “  “ I got a dream so I can't stop now. “  “ I gotta stop feeling invisible -- and start feeling invincible ! “  “ The hardest thing is believing in your dreams ... “  “ I feel like a stranger to myself, and sometimes that feels dangerous. “ “ ... But, I'll bet you'll see me for who I truly am. “  “ Some days I look in mirrors, and I wonder who's that man ... “  ” When your fear's near, you don't wanna get closer ! “  ‘ Let Go ‘  ” Sometimes I don't really know myself. “ “ Devil’s on my back, pray for me -- I need help. “ “ An angel’s in the front tryna guide my steps. “  “ Who do you call when you need some help ? “ “ Who do you call when you by yourself ? “ “ Who do you call when you feel down low ? “ “ I just wanna scream -- I just wanna explode ! “  “ I got a devil on my left & a angel on my right. “ “ I'm just tryna live my life; You know I'm just hangin' in the fight. “  “ Violence in the streets: I just wanna calm the beast ! “  “ All these problems I'm just fightin' with myself are enemies. “  “ I'm looking for my happiness now. “ ‘ Sunflower ‘ ” Needless to say; I keep her in check ! “  “ Callin' it quits now ? Baby, I'm a wreck ... “  “ Crash at my place -- Baby, you're a wreck. “ “ Someone took a big ‘ L ‘; Don't know how that felt ! “  “ Lookin' at you sideways, party on tilt ... “  “ Some things you just can't refuse. “ “ She wanna ride me like a cruise & I'm not tryna lose ! “ “ ... Then, you're left in the dust. “  “ I think your love would be too much. “  “ You don't make it easy -- no. “ “ Wish I could be there for you ! “  “ Every time I'm walkin' out, I can hear you tellin' me to turn around ... “ “ Fightin' for my trust & you won't back down ... “ “ Even if we gotta risk it all right now ? “ “ I know you're scared of the unknown & you don't wanna be alone ... “ “ I know I always come and go ... but, it's out of my control. “ ‘ What’s Up Danger ‘ ” Two-thousand surroundin' us. “  “ You’d travel two-thousand kilometers to hang out with us ?! “  “ What's up, danger ? “ “ Ayy, gettin' old; they doubted us ! ( Makes it that more marvelous. ) “ “' Cause I like high chances that I might lose. “ “ I'm insane, but on my toes -- I could keep the world balanced on my nose. “ “ I had a slumber party wit' all my foes. “  “ Now, I wear 'em like a badge of honor on all my clothes. “ “ If I'm crazy, I'm on my own. “ “ If I'm waitin', it's on my throne. “ “ If I sound lazy; just ignore my tone ! “ “ Mama was always askin', ‘ Where did I go wrong ’ ?! " “ I like it when trouble brews, I won't dare change ! “ “ I like it when there's turbulence on my airplanes. “  “ I like it when I sense things that I can't see yet ... “ ‘ Save the Day ‘ “ I pull up and save the day. “  “ How could I forget ? “  “ It takes some courage to bet. “ “ That must be why you’re in debt. “ “ You take the bait and get caught in the net ! “  “ Evil will never prevail, suckers ! “  “ What is real will never fail to prosper. “ “ All of these people sayin' that they want the treasure ? “ “ Careful of the wishes you make up on your blessings. “ “ Because the devil in you is plottin' against you ... “ “ ... And you'll find that your worst enemy is within you. “ “ It's me & my friends & I know that they got me ! “ “ Got no fear in my heart 'cause I know that I'm brave. “ “ Never gave up, kept my head in the game ! “ “ If you ever get lost, then I'll come back and find you ! “ “ On a bad day, a villain can't defeat me -- “ “ Everybody gotta fear when there's combat. “

#lyric sentence starters #song lyric meme #lyric starters #rp meme #roleplay sentence starters #roleplay meme

[luciddasher]

Ello and welcome to my first ever imagine, in advance i would like to say sorry for the Grammer mistakes, I am your host for this afternoon/night/morning which ever one you prefer to use.

Let me introduce myself i am very own your @lucid_imagines_<3 if you have any questions or are simply interested about anything feel free to leave a message/ comment 💖 (I do take requests)

Tlb 87 × reader angst

Sleep paralysis demon Dwayne 🖤🌌

"Imagine if i decided that tonight was the night 🌃 that is came to an end, all this suffering, not like anyone would care, they'd be happy I'm gone because I'm not worth time or trouble, I'm just useless little Y/N".

pov flash back

The hot humid breeze that traumatized the civilians of Santa Carla was something else especially in the hot summer nights .

Waking up in the middle of night covered in sweat was no biggie for me, most nights I'd scare myself awake with just the sound of my own crying, but tonight was different I felt as if I was being watched.

Snapping back into reality back into the real world, i Opened my eyes my hair drenched in sticky sweet, after a quick scan of the room my body froze as i stared in fear into the corner of my room looking back to me, yellow eyes that only seemed to disappear into the dark shadows of the corners of my room.

End of pov

I remember as i was growing up i would

I'd always talk to the man in the corner i liked to call him Mr whispers, he was my only friend growing up even though I'd never actually seen him before, no one else knew about him besides me.

My mum said he wasn't real and that he was. Only apart of my imagination, she told me that i should make friends since i didn't have any, but I didn't mind that i didn't have much friends growing up, not that i cared, Mr whispers would come by every night to see me, he'd tell me stories about everything he even told me about his brothers, 3 of them, Marko, Paul, and David. But Mr whispers would never stay for to long There were nights that could drag into Mornings,

But after a couple of years he stopped visiting, And that's when the night got boring and cold, i was only 9 at the time but that didn't stop me from looking for Mr whispers.

So every night when my mum would go to sleep i would jump out of bed and tiptoe to the door pushing open the slides and let the curtains flow across the the stone cold floor as the cold breeze danced with my curly Brunette hair breathing in a deep breath of salt air before stepping on the the soft sand.

End of flash back…

Present…

Walking on the beach of Santa Carla was like a treat after a long days of work, minus the over baring surf Nazis that though that they practically ran this shit show

With nothing but the moonlight to guide me along sea shore it was like old times where me and mum would walk along the beach Just enjoying the smell of ocean water as it came crashing like the waves as it filled my nostrils.

Half way down the beach i could see and hear the joyful laughter and excited screams as they filled the air, colourful lights of the carnival rides, games and the smell of deep-fried food there was. Always something about the thrill of the chase that excited me, nights I'd spend hours on the beach and just listen to everything around me.

the sound of water crashing onto the shore, but tonight felt different like there was something waiting for me in the distance, that distance being the board walk, Making my self across the beach trying my best to avoid any no good slimy surf Nazis, without any trouble i make it to the stairs only to come face to face with baddest bunch of them all The 'lost boys'

( dun dun dun👁️👄👁️ Zaddies 🤧 I'm sorry but that all I have for you tonight please leave a comment on anything I should to make it better)

Requests are open so feel free to ya know, ask and you shall receive 😌

#zaddie #lost boys 1987 #tlb 87 #marko #paul #david #Dwayne #soulmate

[kahaani-writer]

spitball incident:

Yeah his eyeball is rolling on the floor. Yeah, he’s screaming. So what? I believe he deserved it to be quite honest. His loud mouth got him into this in the first place, and I don’t think it will get him out of it. My eyes travel to the eyeball once again, gruesome and morbid as it is. Other children yell for the teachers and the girls cover their eyes in horror. I stay calm in the center of the chaos. Quiet and tranquil, wanting to pounce. They are afraid of me, I see that now. Maybe accepting my defeat is the best idea and I should walk myself to the principal's office.

What a lame story to have. “I lost my eye to a spitball incident back in 6th grade.” Granted the spitball was nothing less of a rock. I should have given him a tale to tell, one that draws attention. “Oh this? No biggie, just got mauled by a lion back in my youth.” Well, too late to rethink my choices, he's already one eye down and I dont think I can get away with mauling the second one out.

My feet mindlessly take me to the office I know so well. The kids shout after me, taunting me while painful screams from the mangled boy reverberate through the empty halls. Do I believe that this will be the last straw for the school? Traumatizing a class of children, handicapping another child. I'll be expelled at the least. Could this be classified as a premeditated attack? It most certainly was.

My grandma drove me to the dollar store to pick out some slingshots with me. She had no idea the ways I planned to utilize them. Really in some ways it's the teachers fault for leaving an entire class unattended.

#writers #writing #reading #books #my writing

[babysoulblaze]

today I’m gonna talk about my eating disorder...

I’ve always wanted to talk about it for so much but i can’t with people cause its silly for them. It’s always like “oh, just eat” like WOW honestly I never thought about telling myself this every time i stare into one of my u8sed to be  favorite food; thinking about how many calories are in it and the guilt I’ll feel after i consume it. It honestly makes me wanna scream not these thoughts; how anyone could be so inconsiderate and ignorant to a point to tell you thats bad or just eat or you should eat u can’t do that. Of course the thoughts also make me wanna scream but in a totally different like i will just rip my head and throw it out of the balcony. Back to the ignorant people; there is this other type that has no consideration or ever tried to think and sympathize with someone before ever in their life. It honestly makes me wonder how could someone just get to a point like this. Its the triggering type that absoulotely know you have or suffered from an eating disorder. I’m so mad writing this cuz It pisses me off and triggers me. They be like “oh i haven’t eaten anything today.” “i haven’t had dinner at all this week” “i baisically live on tea” “ Oh i don’t eat” FUCK YOU HONESTLY FUCK YOU FOR UNVALIDATING MY ED AND TRIGGERING ME AND BEING THIS FUCKING INCONSIDERATE. FUCK YOU FOR RUINING MY RECOVERY. MY ONLY CHANCE TO RECOVER. 

About this recovery one time I told this person what I was having for breakfast, and MIND YOU this person knows that i have an ed, and the audacity THE AUDACITY!!! they were like “OMG YOU EAT A LOT WOW YOU EAT A LOT” i just wanna know what was a lot? was it the boiled egg? or was it the bite size no carb bread? or was it the 4 grams of labeneh spread on that bite sized bread? I just wanted to know. Even if it is actually a lot you should never tell someone recovering thats a lot no matter how much it is. 

Another thing people that don’t listen or see screams for help like really really? I’m literally right here showing you that ive lost this much weight in a short span of time and you congratulate me? Making you lie to my mom about me eating and apologizing and you say that its no biggie and you’d do the same if u were me??? I’m just too mad too mad there are so many more sitiuations countless but these were the one that stuck to me.

#eating disorder #anorexjk