#scorpion steak

[tastesoftamriel]

Hey! Piggybacking off the previous ask: I would be desperately curious to hear some of your thoughts on Ash’abah cuisine! I also seem to recall you posting once about how the foods of Craglorn and interior Hammerfell might differentiate from foods along the coast, but I can’t seem to find it. Could potentially be related topics? Most bustling cities in Hammerfell seem to be along the coast, and I don’t imagine they’d want Ash’abah pariah tribes just hanging around, so idk. It’s a thought!

You are correct that the nomadic Ash’abah are primarily at home deeper in the northern Hammerfell deserts. This is partially because of the posher coastal folk making their disdain known to the group, and partially because, in the words of a member of an Ash'abah group I stayed with for a few weeks, they are at home in the desert.

In a similar vein to Ashlanders in Morrowind, Ash'abah cuisine is shaped by the hostile environments they inhabit, and are therefore unique from urban Redguard fare. While trade with wandering merchants is certainly arranged in order to obtain essential ingredients like spices, grains, and oils, it isn't relied on as the backbone of Ash'abah food.

The traditional Ash'abah diet is somewhat restricted due to the scarcity of the Alik'r, yet through generations of shared knowledge, they have learned to harvest the bounty of the sands. Dunerippers; lizards; giant scorpions, snakes, and spiders; wild goats and camels; rodents, and birds like fellrunners all have edible components, if you know how to cook them! Aloe and cactus are also popular, refreshing inclusions in food to make up for the lack of vegetation.

At the end of my time with the Ash'abah, we sought and gained shelter at a johad and shared a feast the night before my departure. Every other person in the group contributed a dish, meaning we had quite a spread! Jerboa grilled in giant wasp honey; cous cous salad with cactus chunks; sand-baked duneripper shank; barbecued lizard skewers; giant snake steaks cooked in black garlic and camel fat; whole fellrunner roasted on a spit with chili goat's butter, and a rich and spicy scorpion tail soup with wheat flatbread were the main dishes on offer. To end the meal, we had a chilled aloe pudding, made with goat's cream, cardamom, giant snake egg, and a good heap of sweetened aloe pulp. ~Talviel

#Asks #Ash'abah #Redguard #Redguards #Hammerfell #Tes #The Elder Scrolls #Cooking #Food

[officialparknerawards]

This Year’s Nominations

Fic Nominations

Best in Fluff

“Potato Gun Mechanics” by hisfirstnamesagent

“confessions (just for you)” by blxrryfxcxd

“(A Picture Can Say) A Thousand Words” by shipskicksandgiggles

“You’re Breathtaking” by Tea_For_One_Please

“Pete, I’m Fake Drunk and Wanna Go Home” by Sarah_Sandwich

Best in Hurt/comfort

“a rainbow doesn’t always have a pot of gold” by Scarlettpin

“She’s My Sister” by Weirdness_36

“For the First Time, Eye to Eye” by Sarah_Sandwich

Best in Angst

“Tools to Fix You” by shipskicksandgiggles

“we were all just humans” by MayWilder

“i wish that i was homeward bound” by thompsborn

“rise and fall of the tides” by enzhe, MayWilder

Best in Fieldtrip

“Obligatory Field Trip Fic” by Dredfulhapiness

Will be open for last minute nominations during voting, provide link in other option

Best in Social Media AU

“A Spider on the Web” by bee bark (nachtwaechterin)

“Potato Gun Mechanics” by hisfirstnamesagent

“creeper, aw man” by impravidus

“twitter beef so salty and scalding hot that it’s a well done steak” by impravidus

Best in Post-No Way Home

“We’re Happy To Serve You” by ExcaliburLibrary

“After You” by WaywardKeener

“i wish that i was homeward bound” by thompsborn

Best in Non-canon Compliant

“Space in Your Bed” by PeachyKeener

“we were all just humans” by MayWilder

“i wish that i was homeward bound” by thompsborn

“Tennessee Whiskey” by Superstitious

“Lemon Boy” by Sarah_Sandwich

Best in College/University

“Too busy being yours” by everythingisconnected

“Or Whatever” by shipskicksandgiggles

“The Hottie Across the Hall” by coconutknightshade

“i wish that i was homeward bound” by thompsborn

Best in Superhero Harley Keener

“it’s always who is spider-man, never how is spider-man” by i_regret_thatpersonalityquiz

“saving peter” by thompsborn

“Parkner Meets Miraculous Ladybug Tropes” by impravidus

Best in Identity Reveal

“Spider At Home (ah-ah)” by the_oncoming_stormageddon

“Simply the Best” by impravidus

“As You Wish” by Superstitious

“Tennessee Whiskey” by Superstitious

Best in Future Fics

“Head in the Stars” by shipskicksandgiggles

“not done yet” by thompsborn

“no one else was in the room where it happened” by LilacsAndLilies

Best in Proposal/Marriage

“The Proposal” by impravidus

“Stuck in the Middle” by impravidus

Will be open for last minute nominations during voting, provide link in other option

Best in Tony Stark Involved

“The Hottie Across the Hall” by coconutknightshade

“Potato Gun Mechanics” by hisfirstnamesagent

“Devils in the Details (but you got a friend in me)” by PeachyKeener

“Well, this is awkward” by Saturning

Best in Soulmates

“Lobsters are mermaids to scorpions” by sammiespider

“Garden Growing” by saladbabie

“promises, promises, promises” by MayWilder

“Skin-Deep” by m4xw3ll

Art Nominations

Best in Digital Art

Harley Keener Introduced At CEO of SI by TEDDY

"Laddie & Spidey !!" by cqlementine

Unnamed by Darka

Best in Physical Art

Aka Peter and Harley won’t stop flirting by Mauvera

Will be open for last minute nominations during voting, provide link in other option

Best in Collage Art

For October Parkner Week by EmmaElsa0000

Will be open for last minute nominations during voting, provide link in other option

Creator Nominations

Best in New Writers

Weirdness_36

DiAngelosBae

Will be open for last minute nominations during voting, provide link in other option

Best in OG Writers

@official-impravidus

@thompsborn

Will be open for last minute nominations during voting, provide link in other option

Best in Artist

@peanuttoffee

@cqlementine

Will be open for last minute nominations during voting, provide link in other option

#parknerawards #parkner #parknerawardsnominations #parknerawards2023 #harley keener #peter parker #harley keener x peter parker #peter parker x harley keener

[spinnysocks]

tlg outlanders as daz quotes

inspired by this tiktok :)

Sumu after watching Scar's Army get blasted away by the Lion Guard: ALRIGHT THEN! Moving out immediately! Kenge, grab your bag!

Tamka: When you come and meet me on a date I'm all romantic and shit! I'm in the corner like *strums guitar* Would you like a steak?

Scar's Army after every battle: Jesus Tapdancing Christ, I need a drink.

The Idiots: Oh my god, where are we? We're stranded in a land I've never seen before! Where are we? Wait, is that our friend's house?!

*Scar's Army arguing*

Ushari: You need to back off!

Janja: No one needs to back off, someone needs to explain the SCORPION!

Bunga to Kion: Don't ask your grandpa for help! What's he gonna do? Have a stroke in front of Scar?!

Kion: Look at the state of the Pridelands... You couldn't get much worse could you?

*Scar setting Pride Rock on fire*

Janja: We might actually win over the Pridelands!

*Gets absolutely blasted by the Roar*

can i just say the entirety of his cooking simulator series screams outlanders chaos to me, especially kenge vibes hgfhdh - i suggest watching it it's hilarious

bonus not-daz quote

Kiburi, pointing at Makuu: What kinda GARBAGE is that?! Oops, my anarchy symbol

#sorry there's not many i need more ideas 😭 #the lion guard #tlg #tlg outlanders #tlg memes #tlg outlanders memes #tlg incorrect quotes #incorrect quotes

[vg-soundtrack-showdown]

Song recs from nomination form below the cut

Professor Layton: Main Layton theme, About Town, The Unwound Future, The Veil of Night, London Streets Remapped, Folsense, The Gilded 7, The Scorpion, The Golden Garden, The Norwell Wall, The Great Don Paolo, Descole's theme, Theme for Targent

OFF: O Rosto De Um Assassino, Minuit fond la caisse, Silencio, Peppersteak, Desperately Safe, Pepper Steak, Windows Licking, Avatar Beat, Unreasonable Behavior..., Brain Plague (Rewind/Reverse), Soft Breeze, Flesh Maze Tango, Fake Orchestra, Fourteen Residents, Race of a Thousand Ants

#professor layton #off game #video game soundtrack showdown #soundtrack showdown #tournament poll

[nanistar]

hi nanistar. i was wondering if all your beautiful cat oc's were seated at a dinner party, who would sit next to saltburn to make her the happiest? amd who would make her the angriest to be sandwhiched between ? and what would she be eating? everytime your comic updates i eat salt.

i love this question what the hell. also don't eat straight salt

Normally i'd say, she'd be happiest between Silversky and Hollowspur, but if we're going off of where we are currently in the story, i think she'd rather sit next to briskwater. he doesn't particularly make her happy but i think she would enjoy bullying him with Hollowspur. She gets along with anyone and can make conversation, so i think she'd adapt to being placed next to anyone. She would have lots of fun besides flickerstar, and she would probably get into trouble if she was sitting between Chollatail and Vulturepaw. Angriest in current canon would be Silversky and probably her dad Chalknose, but she's placing a lot of blame on Silversky right now so just being in her vicinity would be enough to piss her off. if it were regular, outside of current canon, i'd say being placed next to Hawkwasp and Downjay. Hawkwasp for their treatment of Hollowspur-- which i will get in to (someday), and while she's fine with Downjay in small doses, they tend to get really argumentative and are the kind of person who needs to get the last word in, which she finds irritating. couple that with Hawkwasp's shit vibes and you've got a disaster of a dinner party just waiting to happen. If given the choice to eat Anything for a big dinner, i think she'd go with some classic tex mex, or a big plate of grilled steak+veggies (and scorpions, much to everyone else's disgust)

#nyask #saltburn #this one is really g ood i had to think about it for a long time

[helix-studios117]

Halo Reloaded: Crush

The mess-hall is bustling with activity today, and the members of Blue-Team found themselves huddled around their habitual haunt - a sturdy table that had borne witness to countless debriefs and offbeat conversations. Today's topic, however, veered into uncharted territory: the quagmire of relationships.

Fred kicked off the discussion with a lopsided grin. "So, anyone fancy a bit of gossip? Who's caught whose eye around here?" His attempt at casual conversation felt as awkward as a Warthog trying to pirouette.

Kelly, whose reflexes were only matched by her wit, snorted in amusement. "Fred, since when did you turn into a tabloid journalist? Planning to start 'Spartan Weekly'?" she teased, eyes glinting with mirth.

It was Linda, often as silent as a shadow, who dropped the conversational grenade. "Well... I've been thinking about John," she said, her voice as calm as a sniper's breath, yet the words landed with the impact of a plasma grenade in the room.

Fred's fork froze mid-air, a piece of synthetic steak dangling forgotten. "John? As in Silver-Team's John? The baby-faced, 'all-rounder' who's more vanilla than the ice cream they serve here?"

Kelly leaned forward, her smirk widening. "Yeah Lyn, John's as plain as they come. Sure, he's good at staying alive, but let's face it, we're Spartans. We're all good at that. He's like... if 'generic' had a face."

Linda's gaze, usually reserved for scanning distant horizons, held a far-off quality. "There's something about him, though. He's like a 'human Swiss Army knife'; not flashy, but he gets the job done. Every time. And that's... kinda hot?"

Fred chuckled, setting his fork down. "Well, when you put it that way, he's like the poster boy for reliability. And in our line of work, that's more attractive than a fresh coat of paint on a Scorpion tank."

Kelly, always one to add flair to the conversation, twirled her spork. "In a world where everyone's trying to be the hero, Johnny is just happy being a solid, dependable cog in the machine. It's endearing, in a 'bless his heart' kind of way."

The trio continued to banter, the conversation meandering through the many quirks and qualities of their fellow Spartans. It was moments like these - where they could peel back the layers of their armor and be more than just soldiers - that added a dash of color to their otherwise monochrome lives.

#halo #halo fanfic #halo fanfiction #master chief #master chief fanfiction #master chief fanfic #john 117 #blue team #john 117 x linda 058 #fred 104 #kelly 087 #linda 058 #halo au #halo headcanon #halo reloaded #ultimate universe

[tiredpandaportfolio]

What spice tolerances so you think the sparda boys have?

Oh, as a spice fiend, I always have a lot of thoughts about this :D

All Three

So, being part demon means they have hypersensitive... well, senses. They can smell and taste even the most subtle aromas and flavours. Of course, this is a double-edged sword, as it means that while they can savour foods in ways normal people can't, they are all also very sensitive to spices, among other things.

It does help that they all have stomach acid that could melt stones, so they aren't really prone to stomach aches.

They all have rather different tolerances and reactions.

Dante

Dante has an alarmingly high spice tolerance. Despite the sensitivity, he actively enjoys the burn, as long as it has some flavour to it. Specifically, he really likes some sweet with his fire, so he enjoys hot sauces that incorporate fruit.

He won't eat spicy foods often but once in a while he gets that craving and will find the absolutely most mouth-melting hot sauce or spicy dish to have. He treats it as some kind of unhinged challenge to satisfy his adrenaline-junkie ways. Since even mild spice hits harder, he's always trying to see how far he can push it. He doesn't react too strongly too it, pushing himself to try and no-sell the burn. At most, he'll sweat a little bit and sniffle for a bit.

At the moment, he's sitting somewhere around the ghost pepper range (1 mil Scoville and change) and is already itching to find the next challenge.

Trust me, he'll balk at the Trinidad scorpion. The sensitivity/tolerance balance will tip too far, and he will have no regrets.

Nero

Nero likes spicy foods, but his tolerance range is tempered by his reactivity to it. He prefers tangy spicy sauces and dishes, with a lot of salt and lime.

Nero will go for spicy foods whenever he can get them, and tries to make them himself, with varying results. That sticky note in Nico's van is evidence of a poor understanding of cooking... I mean, steak and jalapenos in the oven? Come on... There is a degree of testing his limits rather than enjoying the food for it's sake and frankly, he's still learning to adjust his flavour palate to more "adult" preferences, like pasta all'arabiatta.

He is not above trying to shotgun an entire bag of Flamin' Hot Cheetos just to prove he can.

He unfortunately has some very visible reactions to spice. He sweats like a pig, sniffles for up to thirty minutes afterwards and, after a certain threshold of spice, drinks water and other liquids constantly, to the point of almost making himself sick.

His current record is Thai pepper sauce (about 50-70k Scoville) and that was already a bit of a stretch of his limits. He's one double-dog-dare from Dante away from a trip to the hospital.

Vergil

Vergil does not handle spice very well. At all. His tolerance, much like with alcohol, is rather embarrassing. He actually prefers rather bland food but there's some signs of improvement as he reintergrates into society. He's not even a bit shy about his inclination towards burgers.

He may scoff at Dante, but his own diet is really just as bad. He won't seek out spicy foods but if he's around Dante or Nero, the goading will eventually get to him and he'll try something. Sometimes he ends up liking what he's eating, sometimes not. It's terrible whenever he feels he needs to compete with them because then he'll try something beyond his tolerance and that never ends well.

His reactions are the most extreme; he sweats, his face gets very red, he gets a very runny nose and cannot stop drinking whatever liquid he gets his hands on. He'll get stomach cramps soon enough.

The best Vergil can do is Serrano peppers (about 10-20k Scoville) and that's a stretch. He actually doesn't want to try anything hotter but again... daring/challenging him proves to be his undoing every single time.

#panda writes #devil may cry #dmc #dmc headcanons #headcanons #devil may cry headcanons #dmc dante #dmc vergil #dmc nero #vergil #nero #dante #ask the panta: answered

[jabberwocky-warrior]

Grasshopper Mouse Beastmen

Imagine a Grasshopper mouse Beastmen at NRC.

Everyone would think they are easy to bother and bully. they are in SavanahClaw cause I want them to be.

The dorm is having a cook-out or smth And a student trying to be nice and inclusive, hands them a plate of veggies and greens much to their disgust.

Much to everyone’s surprise and Leona’s amusement, idk they beat the shit out of the guy for the assumption, thinking he's making fun of them or smth.

The Grasshopper mouse is Carnivorous. They eat grasshoppers and Moths to even other mice and in some cases, even rattlesnakes. They kill by jumping on their back and attacking the skull or spine.

Meaning they are just going ham on the steak and ribs that the dorm is grilling.

They probably catch birds around campus for fun.

Public Enemy Number One against Crowley's Crows and Ravens.

honestly, Rook loves following them around as they are a little menace, hunting small game.

They're also nocturnal and howl at night so I think Jack and the other wolf beastmen would have a blast.

Apparently, Grasshopper Mice are Hella resistant to certain Scorpion venoms. [the Bark Scorpion specifically]

I imagine they're really good at potionology. Especially making poisons because of not needing to worry about you know Being poisoned.

All that being said I love them.

Like seriously have you SEEN a Grasshopper mouse they are so cute. They just happen to be slightly homicidal.

The inspiration for this post:

**********************

#twisted wonderland #twst #disney twisted wonderland #savanaclaw #disney twst #twst imagines #twst shitpost #twst oc #Jabberwocky Writing

[vespertineart]

▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎

~☆My General La Squadra Headcanons☆~

Part 1

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Ft: Risotto, Prosciutto, Pesci, Formaggio ~♡

▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎

Risotto nero

◇ Other than Metallica, his favorite bands include Pierce The Veil, Iron Maiden, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Guns N Roses and Linkin Park.

◇ Despite what most people like to think about his personality outside of Passione, especially when it comes to strangers, he is surprisingly very tame. Although he is a very strict and often violent man, it's only with his enemies. As shown in the Doppio fight, he likes to take his time to analyze things; he's patient.

◇ With strangers, he has a more wholesome side. He sometimes gets nervous, dare i say shy when talking to either elderly people or women, mostly his age or of single digit age.

◇He fears he might end up scaring everyone away, sometimes. It's not everyday you see a 6'7 beast with black scleras and fiery red eyes. He tries his best to make his testosterone drowned voice less intimidating, often making his voice small.

"T-that'll be it, ma'am, thank you," He murmurs to the cashier, his back arched so he meets her level. Safe to say his face is red.

(90% of Jojo fans migrated from the Arcana Fandom so i hope you understand what im saying when i tell you to compare him a bit to Muriel)

◇ I don't care what anyone says, he is a huge sweet tooth. I'm sorry I'm stupid and I have a huge soft spot for gentle giants who love sweets and are a literal marshmallow deep down.

◇ Amazing father figure.

Prosciutto

♧ 28 years old.

♧ He is just as disappointment-filling as the Fandom portrays him to be.

♧ favorite bands include Red Hot Chili Peppers, Judas Priest, Kiss, and shamefully, Destiny's Child. He doesn't tell anyone about the last one, but he knows he memorizes 'Bills,Bills,Bills' like his own name and will accidentally hum it when it plays.

♧ However let's give him a little bit of credit. He's not cold with everybody, and most definitely not Pesci. Actually, if he ever was cold, it'd be 10x worse than we think.

♧ Deep down, he has a soft spot for everyone in the team. Especially since, unlike Pesci, as much as he's trying to be, are more stable and mature, they meet up to his 'qualifications' of good company. They don't cause him any trouble most of the time, grâce à two certain members of the hitman team.

♧ Is secretly lactose intolerant, but instead of actually admitting it, he comically dumps that personal hatred onto Pesci.

♧ Despite popular belief, he does not smoke. Cmon. When was the last time you saw a panel of him actually smoking? Is it for the old man aesthetic?🤨 In fact, he hates it. Will start a fight if someone puffs the smoke in his face.

♧ Outside of uniform, he dresses up semi-formal and often has a sweater around in case it got chilly. He owns a ton of Doc Martens and the velvet boots with that ugly mustard color.

♧ His favorite foods are savory ones. Enjoys salmon and steak greatly. Make them for him and you might just win his heart (that's a joke, no you won't)

Pesci

♤ 26 years old.

♤ No, he and Pros are not related.

♤ He has caffeine intolerance, but doesn't know it yet. Despite him knowing it makes his stomach upset, it never bothered him enough to actually ask about it, so he just ends up blaming himself for being too weak.

♤ His favorite bands are The Scorpions, Backstreet Boys, Elvis Presley and a few songs of Paul Ankha.

♤ Is best friends with bugs. He's tried to convince the team to help him make a terrarium for the ones he caught, but Formaggio saw a cicada on the floor and immediately booked it. Or...came back and killed the cicada, in a better sense.

♤ Over the course of later years, he's become more hostile and confident. Though, he still has trouble getting out of situations like having to be in charge of a certain job while the actual worker leaves to do something.

♤ Prefers soft foods. Is really fond of native dishes from a round the world, and enjoys going to diverse restaurants everytime he eats out.

♤ If DP didn't decide to do Pesci so wrong with that shit voice, I'd headcanon his voice to be that of Silco from Arcane.

♤ Style is very casual, he likes to match pinks and greens on smaller articles of clothing a lot.

♤ Owns about 100 Converses and a singular pair of winter boots he's had ever since entering the team.

Formaggio

☆ 24 years old.

☆ He's the Mista of the team. Very clearly. Very good looking, a definite ladies man but absolutely fucking dumb.

☆ His hair is a buzzcut. He's ginger and has freckles and moles everywhere on his body, all over his back, arms, legs , even his-

☆ His favorite musicians are Shakira, Black eyes Peas, Michael Jackson and Kiss. Very chill about his music, and cares more about vibes and being able to sing along easily than just the lyrics.

☆ Has a lowkey decent voice when he hums to his favorite song. Accidentally hit that one high note in Celine Dion's song at 7 am when getting ready, and it was the only clean note throughout his entire screaming session. He still got his ass beaten by Prosciutto.

☆ His style is FRESH fresh. Wears a lot of bracelets, has so many piercings including above his eyebrows. He's a big fan of subtle body modification. He wears anything and everything. Hawaiian shirts and baggy pants, short tees that he styles as crop tops with puffer jackets over them. He's really a vibe, has the best style out of everyone in the team.

☆ Loves anything sour. Will eat a lemon whole when he gets the chance.

☆ Very boyfriend material, he's very hyperactive but chill, shows a sense of responsibility with how he's taking care of his beloved cat, and is overall just a score to pull. Look at him he's so handsome ♡

#jojo's bizarre adventure #jjba part 5 #vento aureo #la squadra #jjba x reader #jjba x you #la unita speciale #la squadra x reader #jjba fanfic #jjba headcanons #headcanon #jojo fanfic #jjba formaggio #jjba prosciutto #jjba pesci #jjba risotto

[tastesoftamriel]

The Drowsy Owl

A taste of Bangkorai in Hallin's Stand's oldest tavern. Weekly specials include basket of roomali roti and yoghurt dip of the day.

Lassi of the week: Coconut and banana

Morndas

Evermore roast chicken rice, served with a rich chicken broth

Tirdas

Fried goats cheese pita pocket, with falafel, breaded Damar Farmstead goat cheese, salad, pickled chilis, and tzatziki

Middas

Horse steak, served medium with mango chutney and curry cream sauce

Turdas

Bangkorai goat cachupa, with beans, lentils, corned goat, spicy goat sausage, and root vegetables

Fredas

Millet and Beef Stuffed Peppers, with fried goat chorizo

Loredas

Halcyon Lake catch of the day, grilled over coals with lime and scorpion pepper sambal

Sundas

Northglen Farm roast goose, with goose fat gravy and a saffron bulgur and date stuffing

#the elder scrolls #tes #food #cooking #Hallin's Stand #Bangkorai #Hammerfell #High Rock #ESO #elder scrolls online #World building #Worldbuilding #Menu #Fantasy menu

[mnikhowozu]

lovely canis, i've only jst found out abt chip & . i simply must kno more abt him pls !!! 👁️ what r his fav foods n hobbies in the wasteland ? ty !!! 💛⭐

of course!!! thank you so much for asking, he is so so special to me 😭😭💖

i've joked about chip being a god-awful cook (or more accurately, a really good cook, but his methods of cooking are a little horrifying sometimes; for example, cooking baby back ribs in a pillow case with a hairdryer). his favorite foods he makes for himself are probably gecko steaks with grilled maize, fried cram sandwiches made with tortillas, and wasteland caravan lunches (cram, instamash, pork n' beans).

his favorite foods in general are probably raul's huevos rancheros, anything boone makes on the grill, anything lily bakes, and of course his favorite drink, sunset sarsaparilla :^)

in terms of hobbies, i think he's really fond of racing sleipnir/horses, playing cards, and having shooting competitions with his companions (probably at scorpions or bottles. or raiders. or legion assassins.)

#oc: chip #im so happy to talk about my man. he's such a funky fella

[lastweeksshirttonight]

What is this?? Lee actually following up on promises of posting longform writing??? I know, I'm scared too.

Last Lee Tonight (wherein Lee quotes noted political commentator Olivia Rodrigo) Season One, Episode Nine

(Original air date: 6/29/2014) Topics covered: Burwell v. Hobby Lobby, LGBT rights and discrimination in Uganda

Trigger warning: discussions of homophobia

"That is why I, personally, refuse to pay for Mennonite cabinets. Because Jason Bourne could, conceivably, beat someone to death with one of those things."

Because the last time I posted one of these reviews was (checks notes) August 2023, a brief recap of where we are in terms of the season developing is in order. Episode Eight was the first time the entire main story was put on LWT's YouTube page, after a very... scattershot approach to uploading segments onto social media. The show is also coming into its own - although the recap of the week segments are bouncing between being extremely surface-level, sometimes only one joke long, and closer to the current iteration of a small yet rigorous dive into a relevant topic for a few minutes before the main topic, the main stories are beginning to take longer form, even though they are still tied to the idea of the show being immediately relevant.

This episode is one of the few I think is, with a few exceptions, almost completely available on the LWT YouTube page worldwide. Both major segments are uploaded, as well as an extended interview segment. Looking forward, they do experiment with the idea of breaking up most of the episodes and loading them onto YouTube for the rest of season one. At least they're actually, um, loading the main parts of the episodes on YouTube from here on out. As I've said many times before, no one had any idea what kind of show LWT was supposed to be or what it would become.

Another fun fact - apparently you can no longer screenshot these episodes I bought on YouTube on my desktop with PrtSc. What the fuck. Is up. With that?! (aaaah~) Fuck you business daddy you complete sack of daddy-shaped shit. (Clearly I have my ways of getting around this, even if the screenshots seem a bit blurry to me, but... fucking hell, I'm just trying to take a screenshot OF SOMETHING I PAID FOR.)

ANYWAYS. There's an episode of LWT we're ostensibly discussing!

Our first topic is the 2014 World Cup. England has been knocked out, so the tournament is dead to John. Oh John. So innocent. So full of life. You have no clue about the shitstorm you're gonna drop on FIFA's doorstep next season.

At the World Cup, an Uruguayan player, Luis Suarez, bit an Italian player, something I totally forgot about. He also bit TWO OTHER PEOPLE. John calls the Italian player "a delicious piece of prime Italian steak" - I forgot that chaotic bisexuality has been baked into this show from day one but I love it.

(Based on the only hate comment I've ever received, I know someone will probably deign to tell me that John is not bisexual, which... I know. But the writing of this show has chaotic bisexual energy - in some seasons, like the one where John begs Adam Driver to chokeslam him into a table regularly, energy honestly isn't a strong enough word to describe whatever's going on - and I like acknowledging that element of the show.)

John mentions the week has been awash with depressing terrorism news but leads into a segment about Boko Haram being driven out of their hiding places by snakes and bees, an incredible victory for the scariest parts of nature. John is furious that scorpions have instead decided to hide in bananas in supermarkets instead of fighting terrorism. John's grin after delivering that joke is effervescent. He loves this kind of stupid, "now THAT'S a sentence"-style joke.

He's so happy y'all

We take a hard left turn into discussing Syria, and that the US is looking to send money to "appropriately vetted" rebel soldiers. The obvious question is asked - how do you vet rebel soldiers? John suggests a trade-school-style commercial to recruit potential rebel soldiers. (The offer is open to bees and snakes!) One thing I like about the early episodes that does still come through from time to time on the show are these sorts of Daily Show-style fake commercials and PSAs. They can get repetitive after seeing the segments they're covering, but there's usually some fun twists and chances for some real absurdities and escalations you can't do in the show proper.

Our first real segment follows after this, on Burwell v Hobby Lobby. You may remember this as the court case that allowed for Hobby Lobby, a crappy JoAnn's knockoff run by evangelical Christians who also stole artifacts for a bible museum, to not pay for an employee's birth control through the Affordable Care Act because it went against their religion. As a corporation. Because corporations are people now. God this country sucks.

At the time of airing, this decision hadn't been made yet by the Supreme Court, so John is going over the details of the case, including the questions at the center of it - do corporations have freedom of religion, and are corporations people? John confidently says "no" before realizing he has to actually discuss this, and I really want to live in 2014 John World. This whole segment has a lovely capper extending two ideas to their logical, absurd extremes - government cannot be an a la carte system, something John demonstrates by showing a wild variety of things people don't want to spend their taxes on which starts fairly even-keel but spirals into Fox News talking heads saying that their tax dollars are being spent on Mexican prostitutes. And on the flip-side, if corporations are people, well, people die. Amongst other things.

Something that's been a bit lost about this case in the ten years since is that a Mennonite sect that owned a kitchen cabinet making company also sued the government over providing birth control. I totally forgot about that.

Our "And Now This" segment is on politicians misusing the word 'literally'. Chris Traeger literally adored this segment. (It's short and is exactly what you'd expect. Not much to say here.)

The next segment is on LGBTQIA+ rights in Uganda. Interestingly, John introduces this segment by saying "finally tonight..." despite being only 12 minutes into a 30 minute show. Definitely had me checking the clock in confusion.

I appreciate that John opens this segment not sugarcoating anything happening to LGBTQIA+ individuals in Uganda, even before he gets into the details of the anti-gay laws there. While there's been segments prior that have been obviously extremely serious, this is the first one that feels like John is coming from a place of seriousness first, jokes second. There are plenty of jokes, yes, lots of very funny ones. But when you compare how this segment opens, with no frills or equivocating, to even the Hobby Lobby segment earlier this episode, there's a pretty obvious difference.

People really didn't know how to react to the line "the moral arc of the universe is long, and it bends away from Uganda." There's like one scattered laugh at that. I'm pretty sure it wasn't supposed to be a joke.

A lot of the details of this segment are deeply upsetting, especially post-Trump in a world where it feels like freedoms are rolling back everywhere and extremist hatemongers like Scott Lively are being treated more and more seriously. The fact that he was laughed at here in the past is refreshing, but knowing that he'd likely be a top senate candidate now is so distressing. There's a lot of things that can be seen in this show in hindsight, most of them so far more benign than this. Unfortunately, the exportation of homophobia now looks less like the death throes of a dying political position, as John posits here from 2014, and more like a big factor in sowing the seeds for this last decade's right-wing global surge.

That being said, Pepe Julian Onziema is a true portrait of grace under fire. The interview with Onziema in the show is extremely illuminating, the kind of interview that makes me wish John did more interviews. Onziema is a delight - I love his seriousness in speaking to the realities of living as an LGBT+ person in Uganda, and his bravery in fighting this fight despite the looming threat of severe prison time. Relatedly, "Sorry doesn't cut it" is such a great comeback to John apologizing for being part of two groups of people that brought this wave of homophobia to Uganda.

There is an extended interview with Onziema on YouTube that dives further into some of the specifics of certain social elements, like context into how Ugandan discourse took on elements of American homophobic talking points (like "gay people are recruiting children") and a timeline of Scott Lively's touring of Uganda. John manages to completely break him by singing part of an early hateful song about "the rainbow belonging to God" as well, which made me so happy. Turn those hateful things into ludicrously stupid ones to destroy them.

I do highly recommend watching this interview - it's one of the best things that LWT has ever done, still. This has stayed with me for 10 years.

Other notes:

Hey. Hey Lee. You gonna talk about the fit?: Yes of course I am, the meds didn't change my brain THAT much. We have a light blue shirt with a dark blue tie with lighter piping, and a gray suitjacket. This is a subdued look but I like the neutral slate color combination going on here. 8/10

I haven't mentioned the unique title cards for each episode of LWT yet, mainly because this is the first one I found really funny - it's a picture of Renaldo with the caption "Kickus Ballium". (New name for football ahoy!)

Please enjoy this incredible "I'm so smooth" looking freeze frame that I took while pausing the episode to write. So smooth.

"I've got to be honest, being British is sometimes a little like being an alcoholic. When someone says you did something awful, you find yourself going, 'Honestly, I don't even remember doing that, but yeah, probably, probably. I'm a dick, I'm a dick.'" He slipped so easily into that Ian Duncan mode for this line, I so hope he comes back for the Community movie.

#john oliver #last week tonight #last week tonight with john oliver #last lee tonight #Youtube #i am aware that i have spent over half a year on this and have only gotten nine episodes in

[dungeon-meshi-tournament]

You guys voted for it, so here's the

Most Delicious Meal in the Dungeon Tournament

This is the masterpost for the tournament. I'll pin it and update it with every new round, so you'll be able to easily find all polls easily.

The rules are very simple: You just vote for whichever meal you think tastes best, and the meal with the most votes advances to the next round.

Finale:

Red dragon meal vs Marcille's hometown local cuisine (Red dragon meal won)

Battle for the bronze:

Vegetable and chicken stew with bread vs Hamburg steak with changeling sauce (Hamburg steak with changeling sauce won)

Previous rounds under the cut

Semi-finals:

Vegetable and chicken stew with bread vs Red dragon meal (Red dragon meal won)

Hamburg steak with changeling sauce vs Marcille's hometown local cuisine (Marcille's hometown local cuisine won)

Quarter finals:

Mandrake kakiage and big bat tempura vs Vegetable and chicken stew with bread (tie, Vegetable and chicken stew with bread advances)

Red dragon meal vs Cockatrice and egg ankake (Red dragon meal won)

Soul eggs benedict vs Hamburg steak with changeling sauce (Hamburg steak with changeling sauce won)

Head-chopping rabbit curry vs Marcille's hometown local cuisine (Marcille's hometown local cuisine won)

Round 3:

Huge scorpion and walking mushroom hotpot vs Mandrake kakiage and big bat tempura (Mandrake kakiage and big bat tempura won)

Vegetable and chicken stew with bread vs Court cuisine full course meal (Vegetable and chicken stew with bread won)

Tentacle and kelpie stew vs Red dragon meal (Red dragon meal won)

Dryad potage and sauté vs Cockatrice and egg ankake (Cockatrice and egg ankake won)

Fifth floor meal vs Soul eggs benedict (Soul eggs benedict won)

Golden castle meal vs Hamburg steak with changeling sauce (Hamburg steak with changeling sauce won)

The breakfast menu vs Head-chopping rabbit curry (Head-chopping rabbit curry won)

Golden country dragon vs Marcille's hometown local cuisine (Marcille's hometown local cuisine won)

Round 2, part 2:

Rolled harpy egg omelette vs Fifth floor meal (Fifth floor meal won)

Ice golem savoury egg custard and cooked fish vs Soul eggs benedict (Soul eggs benedict won)

Golden castle meal vs Hippogriff soup (Golden castle meal won)

Changeling dumplings from fairy ring vs Hamburg steak with changeling sauce (Hamburg steak with changeling sauce won)

Hot succubus milk vs The breakfast menu (The breakfast menu won)

Head-chopping rabbit curry vs Baked Senshi (Head-chopping rabbit curry won)

Seawater-pickled Izutsumi vs Golden country dragon (Golden country dragon won)

Marcille's hometown local cuisine vs Stir-fried walking mushroom with medicinal herbs (Marcille's hometown local cuisine won)

Round 2, part 1:

Huge scorpion and walking mushroom hotpot vs Roast basilisk (Huge scorpion and walking mushroom hotpot won)

Mandrake kakiage and big bat tempura vs Living armour full course meal (Mandrake kakiage and big bat tempura won)

Vegetable and chicken stew with bread vs Exorcism sorbet (Vegetable and chicken stew with bread won)

Court cuisine full course meal vs Looted grain porridge (Court cuisine full course meal won)

Grilled kelpie vs Tentacle and kelpie stew (Tentacle and kelpie stew won)

Tentacle gnocchi vs Red dragon meal (Red dragon meal won)

Boneless dragon ham vs Dryad potage and sauté (Dryad potage and sauté won)

Cockatrice and egg ankake vs An eastern meal (Cockatrice and egg ankake won)

Round 1, part 4:

Stewed dullahan's horse's head vs Hot succubus milk (Hot succubus milk won)

The breakfast menu vs Succubus and bicorn brain doria (The breakfast menu won)

Phoenix confit vs Head-chopping rabbit curry (Head-chopping rabbit curry won)

Baked Senshi vs Chilchuck ruibe (Baked Senshi won)

Seawater-pickled Izutsumi vs Shinkei-jime Marcille (Seawater-pickled Izutsumi won)

Green dragon's acqua pazza vs Golden country dragon (Golden country dragon won)

Mysterious bavarois and some kind of tea vs Marcille's hometown local cuisine (Marcille's hometown local cuisine won)

Round 1, part 3:

Fifth floor meal vs Mushroom and cheese risotto (Fifth floor meal won)

Nightmares steamed in sake vs Ice golem savoury egg custard and cooked fish (Ice golem savoury egg custard and cooked fish won)

Barometz balut vs Soul eggs benedict (Soul eggs benedict won)

Golden castle meal vs Skyfish and chips (Golden castle meal won)

Griffin soup vs Hippogriff soup (tie, Hippogriff soup advances)

Boiled hippogriff potstickers vs Changeling dumplings from fairy ring (Changeling dumplings from fairy ring won)

Hamburg steak with changeling sauce vs Crispy mushroom and egg sandwich (Hamburg steak with changeling sauce won)

Round 1, part 2:

Grilled giant parasite vs Grilled kelpie (Grilled kelpie won)

Tentacles with vinegar dressing vs Tentacle and kelpie stew (Tentacle and kelpie stew won)

Frog suit vs Tentacle gnocchi (Tentacle gnocchi won)

Let's cutlet the dragon to pieces! vs Red dragon meal (Red dragon meal won)

Boneless dragon ham vs Orc medicinal concoction (Boneless dragon ham won)

Portable meal set for adventurers vs Dryad potage and sauté (Dryad potage and sauté won)

Cockatrice eisbein and dryad sauerkraut vs Cockatrice and egg ankake (Cockatrice and egg ankake won)

Round 1, part 1:

Man-eating plant tart vs Roast basilisk (Roast basilisk won)

Mandrake and basilisk omelette vs Mandrake kakiage and big bat tempura (Mandrake kakiage and big bat tempura won)

Living amour full course meal vs Golem field fresh veggie lunch (Living armour full course meal won)

Vegetable and chicken stew with bread vs Treasure insect snacks (Vegetable and chicken stew with bread won)

Special interfaith holy water vs Exorcism sorbet (Exorcism sorbet won)

Court cuisine: full course meal vs Boiled mimic (Court cuisine: full course meal won)

Kelpie oil soap vs Looted grain porridge (Looted grain porridge won)

#dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #food #cooking #tournament #poll #tumblr poll #masterpost #most delicious meal in the dungeon tournament

[kitsunabi]

You're telling me that the steak meat dropped by scorpions is not mysterious?

#genshin impact #I imagine lumine seeing this and immediately handing it off to Paimon to taste test

[anon-karasu]

Short-Sighted

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Summary: When Lucifer forgets his glasses, Mammon helps him out in a moment of need.

Category: Gen

Rating: General Audiences

Language: English

Characters: Lucifer, Mammon, Leviathan, Satan, Asmodeus, Beelzebub, Belphegor

Relationships: Lucifer & Mammon

Additional Tags: Helpful Mammon, short sightedness, I just wanted to write something cute, Lucifer needs glasses, no beta, Akudonald’s, demon brothers, Forgotten glasses

Short-Sighted

Lucifer adjusted his grip on the carrier bag in his hands as he finished checking the contents inside before he glanced back at the six demons, who were following him down the cobbled Devildom street, and heaved a weary sigh.

“I think that’s everything in terms of grocery shopping,” Lucifer announced, “so unless there’s anywhere else that anyone—?”

“Lucifer, we’ve been out for hours,” Levi groaned loudly as he dragged his feet behind the rest of his brothers, “can we go home now? Before Mammon and Asmo make us go back to Majolish again or to some other normie place.”

“No one said that ya had to come along too,” Mammon pointed out.

“Besides, Satan made us go to the library so it’s only fair,” Asmo chimed in.

“Don’t drag me into your argument,” Satan muttered irritably from behind a book as he walked.

“Will you put that away, you’re going to trip over if you don’t look at where you’re going.” Lucifer shot at Satan in a reproachful tone.

“Tch.” Satan tutted before he muttered something under his breath as he closed the book and glared back at Lucifer. “Happy now?” He asked, sarcastically rolling his eyes.

“Hey, we should stop for a bite to eat.” Belphie piped up, slowing his pace and eyeing an Akudonald’s as they passed by, but quickly rejoining his brothers after.

“I’m cooking dinner when we get home,” Lucifer said, “you can wait until then.”

“I don’t think Beel’s gonna last that long,” Belphie frowned as he stopped to point towards his twin who was visibly torn between keeping up with his brothers and retracing his steps back to Akudonald’s, “I could use a break myself,” Belphie added as he tried to stifle a yawn.

“We’re a fair way from home anyway, so it won’t hurt to get something to eat now,” Mammon shrugged.

“And this is Beel we’re talking about, I don’t know about you guys but I’d rather avoid one of his hungry rampages,” Levi pointed out.

“Very well,” Lucifer relented with another sigh.

Lucifer followed behind his brothers as they filed into the Akudonald’s and quickly separated off into pairs to choose from the menus displayed on the screens above the counters.

“I think I’ll get three gigadeath burgers, a devil zebra steak stack, five sides of deep fried scorpions, and two double poison cheeseburgers,” Beel murmured more to himself as his eyes quickly scanned over the menus.

“That sounds great, Beel.” Belphie yawned. “Hey, can you just grab some devil nuggets for me? I’m just going to rest my eyes a little in that booth over there by the window, okay?” Belphie pointed vaguely before he shuffled away to find a seat while rubbing tiredly at his eyes.

Lucifer frowned as his eyes slowly trailed over the bright menu screens.

“I’m having the flame grilled barbeque black tapir wrap,” Mammon said.

“Then I’ll have the belladonna and hemlock salad,” Asmo said with a thoughtful hum.

“A salad?” Levi gave a snort of laughter and shook his head. “Really, Asmo?”

“Hm? What’s wrong with that?”

“Who goes to a fast food restaurant like AkuDonald’s and orders a salad?”

“But everything else on the menu is so heavy,” Asmo groaned as he turned to the menus once more, “maybe I’ll just get a bloodberry muffin instead?”

“What about you, Satan?” Levi turned to the fourth-born instead.

“Shadow goose burger with fries and a hell soda,” Satan decided with a curt nod.

“Woah, he chose something so fast.”

“That’s what he always orders,” Asmo rolled his eyes.

Lucifer watched as Levi, Satan and Asmo moved to the counter to place their orders before he tried once again to read the menus.

Lucifer narrowed his eyes to squint in hopes that in doing so the words might become clear enough for him to decipher,when he was finally left with no other choice Lucifer reached into his jacket pocket.

Ah.

He tapped over his other pockets as realisation dawned upon him.

I must’ve left my glasses at the House of Lamentation.

He saw something move out of the corner of his eye that pulled him out of his own musings only to find that Mammon had moved closer to his side to read the menus again.

Mammon let out a low, indecisive hum.

“Man, there’s so much to choose from…” Mammon said loudly, “... I have no idea what I fancy.”

“Hm?” Lucifer gave Mammon a perplexed stare. “I thought that you had already picked the flame grilled—”

“I dunno, I’m kinda feeling the spicy devil chicken burger now… or maybe… the spicy poison newt belly wrap?” Mammon mused aloud again before he turned his gaze from the menus towards Lucifer instead. “Hey, Lucifer, you like spicy food right?”

Lucifer stared at Mammon in confusion for a moment or two before he caught a knowing look in the avatar of greed’s eyes.

“That’s true,” Lucifer felt a small smile tug at his lips as he played along, “but I was thinking of getting something a little simpler today.”

“I get what ya mean,” Mammon nodded as he moved away from the spicy food menu to read from another screen, “spicy food can lead to heartburn, so do you think I should go for a wrap or a burger?”

“Definitely a burger,” Lucifer replied with a chuckle as he followed Mammon’s lead, “oh and Mammon?”

“Yeah?”

“I feel like treating you, so I’ll be paying today.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mammon placed the food ladened tray down on the table before he and Lucifer slid into the booth opposite Satan and Asmo.

“What took you both so long?” Satan asked, peering over the top of his book curiously as he watched Mammon divide the food on the tray between himself and Lucifer.

“I couldn’t decide what to get,” Mammon said with a small shrug.

“But isn’t that the flame grilled barbeque black tapir wrap?” Satan frowned as he nodded towards Mammon’s meal.

“Honestly,” Asmo shook his head at Mammon, “you spent that long deciding on what to order and ended up picking your first choice anyway?”

“Heh, I guess, I did.” Mammon chuckled to himself.

#obey me! #obey me! shall we date? #obey me! fanfic #obey me! ao3 #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me satan #obey me leviathan #obey me beelzebub #obey me asmodeus #obey me belphegor #omswd #omswd fanfic #obey me belphie #obey me asmo

[arugula2048]

Top 5 fave pokemon??

This list used to be a lot edgier (Gengar, Yamask, Drifloon, etc) but then I got PokemonGo and mellowed out a bit in general

5. Excadril: my top workhorse in Pokemon Go... but time made me fonder of its whole evo line even when I first thought it was mid. I know better now, I admire their name pun and the steady dependability in performance that they and their Ground type brings to the team.

4. Gliscor: fav from the beginning, its pixel art form was so cute and unique in silhouette to me. Also I love that it bounces around on its tail to move AND has wings, it's so all-terrain on top of its rare purple-gray-pink color and blatant scorpion inspo. I think as a kid I took pride in liking them as if it gave me hipster points?

3. Swampert: eventually the I herd you liek mudkipz jokes stopped being ironic, and I really like Swampert's fuck-off energy. Plus I have fond memories of the safari areas and the cute safari ball. I would've used the safari balls outside of the area if the game let me... we dont talk about Marshtomp, awkward puberties are normal

2. Infernape: fav from the beginning, I chose Chimchar as a starter and took every victory with the rival NPC intensely personally, especially when my other Pokemon friends kept saying Water type Empolyeon was the best and most meta choice. I think I screamed when I got a lucky Monferno with 3* stats in Pokemon Go. I named it Sparks and immediately went broke powering it up

1. Weavile: I love this bratty menace of a pokemon and I have a 3* one named Bolero that I poured all my resources into in PoGo. To be honest I know if pokemon were real it would wreck my shit so fast it would end up on the 6 o clock news, but Weavile is such a vanity pokemon to have that this fact only makes them more of a prize 'mon. These things are canonically mean, nasty, and cut everything in sight up. If I would buy Taco Bell for my Excadril, I would have to buy raw steaks for Weavile.

For my Linoone icon, I was originally wanting an Obstagoon one but found mostly pokefurry art when I looked for pics. Zigzagoon was too cutesy for my taste, and Linoone was a good balance of something that looked like an animal that wasn't... disrespected... in depictions. For now it remains off the top 5 list because I don't have one with good stats yet in PoGo.

#pen pals #i was lowkey surprised i had so much to say abt pokemon when i went into it #this was fun!!