#scared of having done something wrong

[aerknight]

@naffeclipse orcas beach themselves to hunt seals orca!eclipse beaches themself to hunt y/n :)

#falls over #sometimes art inspo grabs you like this eclipse and you start something and do not stop until it is done #that was me with this LOL #i have joined the orca eclipse hype train #yeah uh if someone looks at you like this dont stick around #anyway #i saw some people mentioning on the fic comments they think yn is gonna be turned mer #i hope this does not happen because I CRAVE THE ANGST #cancel the happy endings >:) #also i know the orca thing could just be a design choice #but i like to think its because either #a: mimicking to scare off other predators like sharks #b: mimicking to hunt orcas #imagine being an orca and this thing that kinda looks like an orca at a distance and then when you get closer its all WRONG #apparently this is called aggressive mimicry #mer!eclipse #fnaf au #orca!eclipse #apex polarity #fnaf daycare attendant #my art

[theloveinc]

yandere!bakugo, essentially, TO ME, is just: "If you're good to someone, there's no reason they wouldn't love you. So i'll be good to them, even if it's by force."

#he genuinely thinks simply liking someone and treating them well is enough to make them love him #ignoring the fact you didn't have fun on the last date or the most recent one -- because you said it wasnt for any particular reason #(except he was dark and brooding and scary #and kissed you a little bit too long when he dropped you off.. his arm a just little too tight around your waist) #so why should he stop chasing you? the feelings are bound to stick anyway! he bought you something nice #and even waited very patiently for your to praise him... even if he had to remind you to and asked to go on a date as real thanks #there's nothing wrong with that!! #so why are u still so shy around him!! and have been so busy lately? it cant be on purpose can it? he made sure to kiss u hard at work #to the point you were squirming bc you didn't want people to see!! #caitie here: he's so pathetic he doesn't realize the more he doubles down the more he scares u #and by the time he decides he needs to show you much you mean to him and how to love him back... #he doesn't know that it will never be love. not anymore. not after how he's weighed you down #but he still things HE HASN'T DONE ANYTHING WRONG #terrifying #i could go on. but. #this feels like a sloppy medium just ask me abt it lol #shii posts #gen

[hella1975]

realising something bad about someone that means the world to you should be illegal. id like to live blindly actually

#ive been tiptoeing around this realisation for a WHILE now but today was the first time i actually verbatim in my head #went 'i dont like living with my mum'. and the moment i thought it was like no nooononono lets NOT do that #like objectively my mum is my favourite person in the world and i love her more than every other person in my life combined #but LIVING with her in HER HOUSE is just not... it. and it makes me feel awful for even thinking it bc that's her biggest fear #that we're gonna grow up to have the same relationship that she had with her mum and that ISNT what's happening like i could never #be distant from my mum in fact the reason she has such a chokehold on me is BECAUSE there's so much love there #but it would still break her heart to know i felt this way and i just feel so shitty for it. but like? i CANT relax here #like the thing that made me think it this morning wasn't even an explosive thing like it usually is with her #like every shouting screaming argument we've had ive just taken it. but then this morning when nothing exceptional happened #i was just. done. so basically i told u guys she wanted me to hoover today and already yelled about it YESTERDAY which. whatever #and she goes out every thurdsay until lunchtime and i think ive said on here before that the days we're home alone are HUGE flashpoints #bc if she comes home and perceives that not enough chores have been done/one thing has been done wrong she just hits the ROOF #like her temper is entirely disproportional she gives the same energy for the washing up not being put away that another mum would #give for finding drugs in their kids room. ive truly never seen someone maintain a temper like that woman can it's actually impressive #so yeah she was gone this morning and it just always leaves me On Edge it's never a huge thing bc im not SCARED of her but im not relaxed #and i hoovered for an hour and washed up and then also dusted the stairs and did some other tiny irrelevant jobs #and my sister did fuck all. she pulled a sickie off work and stayed in bed while i fussed about what to do with the dogs and shit #and so when my mum came home ig i was expecting some sort of acknowledgement? like not a round of applause #bc obvs it's just chores and the hoovering she literally told me to do but when my sister had been SO unhelpful and it had been #SO on my mind for hours now i was just. waiting for something? and even i didnt know what so it's not even fair #but my mum came home and decided she was in a bad mood and she had a go at my sister for being lazy and not doing the chores she said #she'd do today and she DIDNT yell at me which she sometimes does just do if she's pissed at my sister. but she just got mardy with me? #like she got up and left to go watch TV in her room and i was like 'oh i can watch it with you?' bc sometimes when they row my mum #hints at me and her going somewhere else to bitch about my sister. but she just shook her head and snapped at me for some dumb shit #like TINY shit id missed and then wouldn't even spend time with me and i was just like. are you serious #and THAT was when i had the thought bc i was like there is actually no winning with her temper #and i can never fully relax around her because of it. even when we're getting on she is at any point seconds away from ripping my head off #and it's not nice being around someone like that ALL THE TIME. and i dont mind it when im at uni bc im at my own house in my own life #but when it's HER house and she makes it very clear that it's HER house and we need her and the car if we want to so much as LEAVE #then that's just not a fucking pleasant environment to be in? right? even if it is just me being a baby? ugh idk and i hate this

[snazzi-strawberri-artz]

HI HI HI!!!! OKAY SO LIKE,,, IM DOING COMMISSIONS NOW,,,GASP????😨😨😨

Ok but seriously ive been thinking of doing commissions for a long time, but the fact that my drawing tablet is slowly dying out on me gave me that nice final push <3

So yeah, all details in my carrd and all that jazz!!!

[I also have a Peso version here!]

#digital commisions #commisions open #AUGH im so scared ive never done this before #but i have to ... for my poor baby tablet 😭😭 #SO THEN I WILL DO IT SCARED!!! #ive been working on this carrd the entire day please appreciate its beauty <3333 #also im so scared that something might be wrong or i missed something in the info #SIGH OH WELL LIVE AND LEARN!!! #and yes that is me modeling for the prices <3 im the best model i know #ive actually made a commissions sheet long long time ago but it was just so. Cluttered and messy and hard to read?? #So yeah carrd it is!!!

[poppies]

2023 was the worst year of my life. not sure what's to come or where to start but i know things have to change, i have to fix things somehow

#i haven't been very active online #last june i experienced something traumatic and i'm stuck in an environment in which i cannot heal #plus chronic pain has inhibited my life to a devastating degree #so all i've done these past months is sink further and further into a sadness and emptiness and pain i can't describe #it's scary to look in the mirror at somebody entirely unrecognizable. i feel hollow and devoid of any traits #i feel i've lost everything that made me 'myself' #lost my family. lost my health. lost myself. lost all the things i cared about once #i don't think i can ever return to the person i was before. so i have no option but to start anew #i need to stop being so terribly nostalgic for the things i can never get back #i can't keep clinging onto broken shards #honestly i know deep down that holding on to the hurt has never served me. and i doubt it ever will #but i'm scared to let go. scared of what will take its place. scared of what i'll find. #i don't think i can heal here #so i'm just enduring. but it's scary how time keeps passing. i've been so dissociated and none of this feels real #i feel so hopelessly lost and trapped and behind. i'm 23 now but it feels so wrong #✩

[asterchats]

you did not get to choose how you responded, your trauma brain did, and you are still alive which means it made a damn good choice

#iiiiiiiiii ammmmmmmmmmm still looking for the thing this is quoting but wow it soothes a huge part of me to have this in my brain #and hold onto it sometimes #you are anxious and you are scared and you are not a bad person for being anxious and scared #and nobody needs to have done something wrong for you to be anxious and scared #and you are trying to survive trying to survive trying to survive. #it is okay to be spooked. it is okay to be figuring out how to be there. you are brave you are brave you are brave #your trauma brain is reacting because it has kept you alive before. it doesn't need to react that much. anchor and keep going

[intoafandom]

.

#right so I’m hiding this sht in the tags because im going to sound like an absolute crazy person and i hope no one sees this or reads this #because im going to sound stupid and delusional and ik im 99.99% sure this is not gunna happen but i have to say it anyway to get it out of #my head. sooo woong dyed his hair back to black which normally i wouldn’t bat an eyelash at but idk im just getting this feeling because #they just freaking played bring it on on the radio and were dancing and singing to ravns part and ON TOP OF THAT THEY ALSO DID REWIND WHERE #XION LITERALLY SANG ALL OF RAVNS PARTS and like i cant stop thinking about it. rewind. REWIND of all songs. why did they pick THAT one. #out of EVERYTHING they picked rewind. the song that pays homage to their past memories as 6. literally doing the choreo in their seats when #the song is about TURNING BACK TIME. and now woong dyed is hair back to black. like how it was right before yj left... #leedos hair is also the same length now...and if Seoho’s hair is back to black as well... #we all feel like something big is coming and when u pair this with all the japan stuff...i cant help but think...and im still thinking about #ravns insta stories. there will be an answer let it be. ive done all i can do now i have to wait for fate. paraphrasing but yeah. #and lets not forget the fact that ravn JUST posted his full face for the first time in months. everything feels so significant and like #everything is coming together for some big moment. i cant stop thinking about it. fvcking rewind. like they’re going to be turning back the #clock completely. same looks as malus aka their last true comeback as 6 and apparently their next comeback is ALSO IN SEPTEMBER?? like... #im probably reading into this but...i cant help but think......something very huge is coming. something HUGE. something more than just #ravn dropping his mixtape. if that’s all that happens I’ll be happy 100% duh...but idk...i just think there’s gunna be something MORE. #im too scared to post this on twitter cuz ik ravn lurks and if im wrong which I probably am I wouldn’t want him to see it #or anyone else either. but im saying it here bc if i dont say it at all ill go crazy. and most of my followers here are b’s fans so they #wont read this and maybe i can bury it lol

[machathecat]

Being around my dad is like being around a fucking ticking time bomb. One bad word and it slip into a lecture and angryness yay

#I'm terrified of just BEING around him because I'm so scared of having done something wrong

[glamorouspixels]

Birthday + I Didn’t Mean to Turn You On/Phrack 💕

It’s the night before Jane’s 16th birthday, and Phryne and Jack are in Jack’s kitchen, baking a cake

It is a relatively simple chocolate cake, but Jack, who is usually an excellent baker, is still nervous because the cake is for Jane’s birthday, so it’s got to be perfect

He practically lives at Wardlow by now, and it is Jane’s first birthday with Jack as a permanent member of the household

(And her first birthday with Jack as her father, but Phryne knows he knows and doesn’t feel the need to point it out to him)

The second time he gets pieces of eggshell into the bowl, Phryne takes the reins and deposits him gently into the nearest chair

Fortunately for their plan, this gets the cake into the oven much faster; unfortunately for Jack’s sanity, he’s rarely seen Phryne in the kitchen, and if there’s anything more overwhelming than having a daughter, it’s having both a daughter and a partner to share his life and his home with

He walks up behind her where she’s chopping more chocolate for the glaze, wrapping his arms around her waist and pressing his mouth to hers when she turns in his arms

He doesn’t expect her to reverse their positions and press him up against the counter (although he probably should have)

She can be rather forceful when she wants to be, and he yelps when his hand flies straight into the dirty bowl in his effort to keep his balance

He can just barely keep it from clattering to the floor, but his hand is covered in chocolate and his sleeve ruined

He can’t take his shirt off without taking care of his hand first, and before he can get to the sink, Phryne has grasped his wrist in both hands and is sucking the cake batter off his fingers, her eyes heavy on his

His shirt isn’t the only thing that comes off, and if they can do that much with such a small amount of batter, he’s not sure he wants to know what they could get up to if they planned for this possibility in advance

(He absolutely wants to know)

Jane’s birthday passes smoothly; there’s laughter (Phryne and Jane), half-suppressed happy tears (Jack), and Jane gets a new bicycle

It’s a good thing that he still has his bungalow, because when his own birthday rolls around two months later, the baking of the cake (with lots of extra batter) is the start of a long, and very private, celebration

It is followed by another far less private celebration at Wardlow, and it’s Jack’s first birthday with both a partner and a daughter

Send me two tropes from this list + a ship and I’ll describe how I’d combine them in the same story!

#i'm not sure what happened here and whether i should apologize for it 😂 #this was fun but as soon as i was done my brain returned to its previous state of... i don't even know what's wrong #but something is #could be the amount of uni work i'm doing #it feels terrible and inescapable and i have no idea what to do about it #also i'm really scared that this is terrible and i'm going to get a bad grade in tumblr ask game

[theforgottendaydreamer]

doctors and nurses should be forced to work in retail before being allowed anywhere near patients

#had to tell the stupid nurse “if i'm not familiar with any of this why am i expected to know everything about it? it's your job to explain” #“i- but-” no no shut up. i'm done with these things. honestly. shut up. #put them in their place. don't be scared to raise your voice when they act allmighty #“you're old enough to-” shut up. would you tell that to someone who's +30? #just because i'm young it doesn't mean you can talk to me like that. at all. stay in your fucking place. #i did every fucking thing by the book. shut the fuck up. it's not my fault if you guys don't fucking communicate #and you know. this happened to me when i got surgery. one doctor told me to take idk what before it. #then the aneathesiologist gave a second dose to me. and i was like “hm. i think i already took that one tho” #“oh really? you shouldn't have” #sir?? it's your colleague's fault. he prescribed it to me. said “take it before the surgery” and i did #how was i supposed to know that the two of you don't communicate?? #“what do you study?” “translation.” “ok then you know languages and this isn't your field of exp-” fucking exactly #so why the fuck are you coning at me?? i'm not saying anything #imagine pulling up to the hospital and a nurse decides to patronise you for being a patient?? uh?? #sir your people told me to do this and that. wtf. #coming* #“say something if you get lightheaded” i'd rather fucking die than rely on you. this is between me and god now. shut up. #* anaesthesiologist. i can spell. #“ok but if you got a weak immune system you should have-” sir. sir. i do what you people tell me to. i can't fucking do whatever i please. #you prescribe me the wrong stuff & then complain when you make a mistake as if it were my fault?? wow. #medical malpractice

[r0p3-bun]

someone just laughed really loud I think it was childe?

#~vani #im scared now #why is he laughing #whats happened #i feel like i have a bunch cats in my head that have done something wrong

[robocops-a-christ-allegory]

Its a shame nobody talked about it like this but I am still convinced there was all kinds of meta shit going on with the Peacemaker show that was really interesting to ME at least. Like the decision to make two guys that hated each other best friends now, and Adrian specifically being Peacemaker's wacky unhinged sidekick whos obsessed with him when Peacemaker made his intro to DC as a wacky unhinged Vigilante villain who was obsessed with Vigilante. Also I still think everyday about how in the show Peacemaker shot his dad with the same kind of gun that his dad killed himself with in the comics. Like.

#I do still think the show was good but its tragic things cant just be good. #you know. like now Peacemaker's stuck with his show design and speaking style and possibly backstory #I am still really scared his shits gonna get rewritten with his show backstory #ok anyway. #My friend was convinced there was something meta with Adrian early on saying people think hes racist because of Peacemaker #because of the racist vigilante issues happening post-Peacemaker appearing and Im forever stuck between like #well thats reaching and well James Gunn is clearly the worlds luckiest weirdest fanboy. #I will say though I cannot objectively judge the show like I cant. #It was like decent and Im unhinged about Peacemaker so to me it was high art #I think adrian stans might have the opposite going on and might hate it on principle of what its done to #the perception of their guy which yeah #if Peacemaker was super OOC in his first big appearance I wouldnt be well. #literally im starting to dislike the show based on peoples reactions to Peacemaker because everybodys #GETTING HIM ALL WRONG ! now

[bards-anonymous]

#delete later #ugh. i feel so lonely #like it just hit me like a truck #sitting in my house completely alone. #i feel like ive done something wrong #im dealing with alot right now and I cant bring myself to talk to anyone about it. i can breath everything about my dad out to anyone #and laugh it off #but rn. #it hurts #it hurts so bad #and why bother anyone with it #im always the one with a problem #of course she would have another one #her fucked up little family and her fucked up body. #nothing can be normal #and as I feel myself slipping #i gotta smile and laugh and act like myself #i feel so scared about what will happen if I lose that. #i feel so isolated and I miss my friends and try to be so good #i know they don’t hate me #i wont make a version of them in my mind that does #but god im so scared all the time

[bibiana112]

Girl are you okay? Cause you've been looking through the "My lesbian experience with loneliness" tag again

Well the short answer is no :D

#the long answer is I saw one post of someone going 'well now that I'm 28 too maybe I'll try doing the same thing the protag does here'' #and nearly cried because 28 is such a ridiculously long time away except not really except it's SO #fucking long and so close to what I was gaslit into believing I would ever have that I'd be lucky to make it to my thirties for no reason #and I never wanted anything different and just wanted to live and had panic attacks when reading but I'd still believe it was inevitable #and now I am suddenly having to come to terms with so much I want from life that I had resigned myself to never having because I couldn't #but how am I meant to do that? it's just hanging over my head now and it feels so stupid and I feel so out of place everywhere #it feels like I'm too bad at being a person to be loved and too angry to even admit I want to be #and too regretful to seek it because I'm scared of trampling over people's boundaries like people have done to me #and like I did too before I grew up and thought my way through having some empathy #why do only boys show any interest in me.... why is every friend I make entirely outside the range of people who could possibly reciprocate #why is it so easy for me to brush crushes aside aren't people supposed to suffer for this stuff #does that prove it's not a romantic crush and it's just that I want to be held and wanted #it feels so wrong to want this after fighting so much just to have fulfilling platonic relationships what's wrong with me #that I still want something else what more could I want this life is so ideal as far as 12 yo me is concerned #...when did my brain start viewing any and all kinds of want or ambition as doomed efforts for me? #I have such a headache all of a sudden #I think... the way I value self preservation has gotten all the way around into being harmful maybe #at least a little #everyone I know is nowhere near the amount of control freak as I am and they just go do things they want to do #have I seen them hurt over the consequences multiple times yes. but . I'm tired of hurting over absence #''did you know wishing you had more extreme and easily verifiable trauma is in itself proof of having undergone trauma'' well yeah but like #fuck why couldn't I be traumatized by anything else that wasn't literally the profession supposed to help you with all the trauma #delete later #like for real I want to delete it rn but I also don't