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#say whatever you want I’ll forever love this man and everything he has become
sanitatcm · 1 month
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POLDARK SENTENCE STARTERS (19/?)
from season 3, episode 1. amend wording as needed!
“are you hurt?”
“please let go - i can manage!”
“you were in difficulty. would you rather i just abandon you?”
“i wish you nothing but good… you must know that.”
“must you turn everything into a battle?”
“lay hand or set foot on anything of mine again, and you will find the battle has barely begun.”
“i know little of these things.”
“perhaps it was a little reckless…”
“your efforts, though valiant, will be in vain.”
“you are my only concern.”
“the subject is closed.”
“you think i could have done better! yes, you’ve said so many times.”
“two words: boarding school.”
“the man never loved me.”
“that’s cheerful…”
“the cards tell me naught.”
“then what could possibly go wrong?”
“we are not so vulgar as to beg.”
“so you’ve escaped your jailers?” 
“i hope in time we can become good friends.”
“i need no permission to visit my own family.”
“am i a bad daughter?”
“he was a bad father.”
“i only wish i could come with you.”
“i’ll be there and back before you know it.”
“i thank the lord kindly, but i believe i know my own way.”
“i think we both know there are things which even you cannot buy.”
“surely his very existence displeases you.”
“i shall tolerate him - for the moment.”
“oh, he is kind - until he gets what he wants.”
“i’d stay but.. i’m already late.”
“what will you do now?”
“and what do you wish?”
“what harm can it do?”
“i did not say i disapproved.”
“i’m a great believer in fresh air and exercise.”
“i see we’ll agree very well.”
“help! give me some help here!”
“you don’t miss your former wedded bliss?”
“why would i distress him?”
“but what could i do?”
“i’m forever in your debt.”
“are you nervous?”
“a remarkable woman i’ve married.”
“would it kill him to know the truth?”
“i’m sorry for that.”
“everyone has shadows. the trick is to outrun them.”
“you should prepare yourself.”
“so much for my wedding night.”
“forgive me - i’ve no wish to be impertinent…”
“did they not love each other once?”
“this accident could hardly have come at worse time.”
“you think it was an accident?”
“a black moon… it is a bad omen, mark my words.”
“i never was the god-fearing kind, but if i was i’d pray.”
“i came back - i realized there was nothing there that cannot wait.”
“and will you stay with me now?”
“hold your tongue, old woman!”
“can you not wait til morning?”
“chastise him for his insolence!”
“that great lump! he doesn’t frighten me!”
“unhand me, you devils!”
“that child of yours… cursed he be…”
“i have never known the blessing of a happy marriage.”
“do not exhaust yourself.”
“can you ever forgive me?”
“what if i told you there was nothing to forgive?”
“there is a conversation which can no longer be avoided.”
“the babe doesn’t look at all like me.”
“are you here to congratulate me?”
“fatherhood changes everything, does it not?”
“will you take a drink with me?”
“why have you really come?”
“you will live in your world and i will live in mine - and there will be no need for our paths to cross ever again.”
“i regret i’m a stranger here.”
“i hope we may meet again.”
“i know why you’ve come.”
“since you’ve lost a part of your family, can you find it in you to embrace a part of mine?”
“there’s something i must tell you… though i fear you will not like it.”
“i’m with child again.”
“everything in this world seems less certain… except for you.”
“with you beside me, whatever life sends, we can face it.”
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Fundamental Differing
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Chapter XII: I’ll Call You Beautiful, If I Call At All
nav | masterlist | playlist | pinboard | chapter xi
summary: seattle always brings out the sentimentality in you, and eddie’s feeling it too.
tags: slow burn, rockstar!eddie x rockstar!gn!reader, mutual pining, forced proximity, fake dating, confessions of feelings (finally), some fluff, lots of angst, consumption of alcohol
a/n: this is one of my favorite chapters i’ve ever written. thank you to my lovely partner and beta reader @children-of-the-grave for helping me come up with an album title and doing the grunt work of proofreading. love you forever.
-
July 1990
Eddie takes another gulp of his beer before slamming it into the recycling bin. “Y’know what, we’re done. I’m not doing this anymore.” He slurs his words as you watch, eyes glazed over with tears.
“What do you mean? We can’t be done if we weren’t anything to begin with.” You’ve had a couple drinks yourself, and the effects are taking a strong hold.
“Perfect! I don’t ever wanna see your face again, got me?” He doesn’t mean that, not even close. But he can’t do this casual hook up thing, not with you. “We don’t know each other.”
“You’re right. I’m not sure we ever did.”
-
Present Day
Your POV
You wake up to an empty bed, the space Eddie once occupied now cold as your eyes open, reorienting yourself. Outside the tiny window, the sun is rising over the Washington horizon, and you feel a wave of peace wash over you. After tonight, you have a whole week off to do whatever you want, in a city that’s become a kind of home to you since leaving Eddie.
Seattle is special, a place you never mind being in, even with its constant rain and uptight citizens. It’s the place grunge was born, and a place you’ve always thrived. Playing here is a dream come true, and you can only beg the universe for it to go well.
The tour buses pull into a rest stop off the highway, and you shove the comforter off your sweaty body. You’d slept fully clothed, something you hadn’t done in a number of years. With the added layers, plus Eddie’s extra body heat, your hair sticks to the sides of your face.
Sliding open the door, Steve greets you with a sleepy smile. “Morning! Sleep alright?”
“As well as I could, all things considered.” You try to hide your embarrassment. You’d slept better next to Eddie than you’ve slept in your own bed, but that’s not something Steve needs to know.
“Well, you’re free now. Go grab some food, we’re almost at the hotel.”
You nod and shuffle through the bus, weaving through the guys of Corroded Coffin, who stand in the hall chatting and chewing on what look to be soggy French fries. You notice Eddie’s voice lower as you approach him and Gareth in the breakfast booth.
“Aw, leaving already?” Gareth teases as Eddie avoids your eyes next to him.
“Haha, yeah. I can tell when I’ve overstayed my welcome.” Eddie’s eyes flick to your face, and you challenge him with yours. You want him to tell you you’re still welcome, you’re always welcome, but he doesn’t say a word, so you turn and exit the bus.
-
Eddie’s POV
The door clicks shut behind you, and Eddie turns back to his bandmate. “Anyway, as I was saying, I have never jumped out of bed so quickly in my life. I woke up and they were like, pressed into me.”
“Were you hard?” Gareth chokes out a laugh at Eddie’s flustering.
“I’m only a man. Of course I was! I debated rolling onto the floor and just never getting back up.” Eddie grins as he speaks, remembering the panic as he bolted upright in bed, dick stiff against his sweatpants as you snored soundly next to him.
“You think they know?”
Eddie shrugs. “God, I fucking hope not.”
Gareth cackles and Eddie shoved him playfully. Truthfully, it was the best sleep he’s gotten in awhile, and he’s forced to admit it’s because of you. Everything about your presence stresses him out, but sleeping next to you has been something he’s mourned for the last two years.
“You guys all set to get moving soon? Ed, go get some food, I haven’t seen you eat in days.” Steve’s standing over the little table, hands on his hips like he’s a soccer mom disappointed in her poorly performing child.
“Yes sir,” Eddie mockingly salutes his friend, who responds with a dramatic roll of his eyes. Eddie slides out of the booth and off the bus, the humid air hitting him in the face as he walks into the rest stop.
You stand with Robin and your other bandmates, in line for greasy burgers as you wipe the sleep from your eyes. You’re still in your sweats and a shredded t-shirt. You lean your head on Robin’s shoulder, seemingly fighting sleep from taking over again. Eddie gets in line behind you, careful to keep his distance.
“Hey, sleepyhead!” Robin turns to greet him, her eyes wide and sparkly.
“Mornin’, Bob.” Eddie grumbles, voice raspy from lack of much use yet today.
“Sleep okay?” He hears the teasing in her tone, but chooses to ignore it.
“Well enough,” He looks at you, and you’re studying the tiles on the floor like a museum exhibit. “I’m ready for a week off, though. Might fly out to Indiana early, go see everyone.” Eddie hasn’t been back since he moved out, shortly after graduation. “You guys got any plans?”
Robin shrugs. “I’ll probably go back home in a few days.”
You nod. “I dunno, I live out here now but it would be cool to see everyone. I’d need to get a hotel, or maybe,” you look at Robin, “my ever so lovely best friend can house me?”
“You know you’re always welcome, my mom adores you.” You beam at her, and Eddie fights the urge to stare, your bright smile now a rarity he likes to cherish when you’re not paying attention.
You and Robin order your food, bidding Eddie adieu for now. He gives you a small smile, but you don’t return it.
-
The buses pull into the hotel parking lot, the rain coming down hard now. He grabs his duffel from under the bus, using it to shield his hair from the weather. Steve is talking to the concierge, looking far more stressed than usual.
“What’s up?” Eddie leans an arm on the hotel desk, and tries to ignore the way the young girl at the desk ogles him.
“They don’t have enough rooms.” Steve rubs his face in frustration.
“Okay, no problem, we can all share.” Eddie’s trying to be optimistic, much to the confusion of his best friend.
“Well, I mean, we definitely could. I’m not sure how that would work, honestly. They have enough doubles for most of us, but-“
The hotel clerk interrupts. “I mean, if you and Y/n take the single, you’d all be set!” She’s practically squealing.
“Ah, so you know who we are, then?” Eddie jokes, causing the girl to blush.
“Of course I know who you are! And Y/n, and both of your bands. I’m a huge fan!” She rambles on, and Eddie feels a pang in his chest. There’s no way you’re gonna let this fly.
Steve sends Eddie a questioning glance, and he shrugs in response. “You’ll have to talk to them. I’m adaptable, I’ll manage.”
As if on cue, you’ve appeared on Steve’s other side. “Why’re you all stressed, Mama bear?” you tease, poking at Steve’s bicep playfully. “Did this lovely lady reject your advances?”
Steve groans. “No! I’m not being creepy, we’re trying to sort out the room situation. They have five. Four doubles, one queen.” He doesn’t continue, awaiting a reaction.
You blink at him. “Okay, that’s enough for everyone, no?”
“It is, if-“
“If Eddie and I take the queen? Because everyone else here is completely platonic with a capital P?” There’s not a hint of irritation in your voice, much to Eddie’s surprise. It’s then that your eyes land on him. “Is that okay with you?”
“Uh, yeah,” Eddie says dumbly, barely hearing you over the banging in his chest. “That’s fine. What’s another night?” He winces as it comes out, realizing how it sounds.
You nod curtly, tight lipped before you look back to Steve. “Book ‘em, big boy. No need to be dramatic.” You give him a pat on the shoulder. As an afterthought, and meeting eyes with the enthusiastic concierge, you approach Eddie again. “I’ll see you tonight, then? If you decide to come back in the first place.” Before he realizes what happens, you’re on your tiptoes. In his ear, you whisper, “I’m gonna kiss you on the cheek now. Because it’s gonna make this girl lose her mind. Okay?”
Blood is pounding in Eddie’s head as he nods. Your lips barely graze his cheek, warm and soft against his scratchy stubble. He closes his eyes, but before he can focus, it’s over, and his cheek is cold again.
“Bye guys! Bye,” You squint at the clerk’s name tag, “Hannah. Nice to meet you, thanks for your help.” You turn, and shuffle back to the elevators, probably to relay the news to your friends. Eddie can feel Hannah’s eyes burning into his skull, but he refuses to acknowledge her again, worrying his eyes will betray him. He’s never been a great liar.
Steve looks at his stunned friend, the smallest of smirks on his face. “You alright over there?” Eddie doesn’t answer, so Steve grabs him by the wrist, waving goodbye to Hannah, who’s still hypnotized by the whole interaction. Once out of earshot, he tries again. “Yoo-hoo, earth to Eddie?” He waves a hand in front of Eddie’s blank stare, snapping him out of his trance.
“What? Yeah, yeah I’m good. I’m great! I’m totally, one hundred percent fine.” He clamps his mouth shut, stifling the panic that will probably return to him later.
“They haven’t done that yet, huh?” Steve teases, no longer hiding his smirk. “You gonna be able to handle this whole fake dating thing?”
“I’m handling it fine, thank you.” Eddie snaps, and Steve raises his hands in defense. He’s not handling it well in the slightest, really.
“Okay, okay, whatever you say. I’ll drop it. But you gotta work on your poker face if you wanna be believable. Even if I had no idea, I’d be pretty skeptical right now.”
“Whatever, dude.” Eddie brushes him off as the elevator dings, and they both step inside without another word.
-
Your POV
“I need a fucking drink!” You flop, face first into Robin’s bed as you groan. Buried in the mattress, you feel safe enough to let it out. Because you can’t do this anymore, and you’re starting to push your luck. “I’mstillinlovewithhim.” Your confession is muffled by the fabric, and the only clue that Robin understands you is her reaction.
“Yeah, no shit!” Don’t think I didn’t see what you pulled down there!”
“What I pulled?” You push yourself back to your feet, jolted by the irritation in her voice.
“Kissing him like that, whispering sweet nothings into his ear.” Robin bats her eyelashes, singing a recap of the events in the lobby.
“I’m supposed to do that, Robin. I’m being paid to, actually! I was told to.” You inject as much venom into your words as possible, and Robin bites her tongue to stop from spitting back.
“Okay. You’re right, you’re right! Just,”
“Just. What.” It’s a challenge. You’ve absolutely had it with the peanut gallery. Between her and Steve, you’ve gotten a verbal retelling of every single time you and Eddie are together.
Robin has never been the type to back down from a challenge, though. “There were no cameras, Y/n. Just a starstruck fan you probably caused the heart failure of. You didn’t have to,” She flails, gesturing to your body, your face, you, “be so all over him.”
You stop short, breath caught in your throat. “Are you defending him?” Of course not. No, she wouldn’t.
“He was my friend too, Y/n. And I cut him off for you.”
Her words sting. “I didn’t ask you to do that.”
“Not in so many words! But I saw how you treated Steve when you caught him and Eddie having a drink. You didn’t talk to him for a month.”
You don’t have a response. She looks at you, eyes wide with what you can finally recognize is anger. “You left Eddie because you thought he changed, right? Have you realized yet that maybe you changed?”
You gnaw your bottom lip until you draw blood, heart quickening as you feel a sob blooming in your chest. Before you can stop them, you feel the tears running down your cheeks.
Robin is quick to notice, and flops onto the mattress. She pats the bed next to her, and you take your seat. “What would be so bad about trying again?” There is no more accusation in her voice, she’s past fighting with you.
You sigh, resting your head in your hands. “I don’t want to admit I was wrong.” Robin is silent, so you look back up to her. She’s stifling a laugh. “What?!”
“Sorry, just hearing you say that threw me off. I know how much you value your pride, but if there’s anyone to let your guard down for, it’s gotta be Eddie. It’s always been him.”
“He just got so different when he started getting famous. I don’t know what happened in the last two years to make him revert like this, but-“
“Seeing you again probably had something to do with it.”
You keep your eyes glued on hers, searching for the punchline. “Please. If it was because of me, he wouldn’t have changed like that in the first place.”
“Okay, maybe not just because of you, but think about it! He got signed, what, only months after graduating? Moreover,” you giggle at her suddenly expansive vocabulary, “He was probably still reeling from, I dunno, almost dying? We all were. He just never got the chance to grieve, let alone get a good night’s sleep! Seeing you after all of that, when he’s been without steady ground to stand on for two years, has to be a slap in the face.”
You blink at her, debating on arguing further. You settle on a question. “Have you been talking to him?”
Robin rolls her eyes. “Lately, yeah. In passing. But it’s always been for your benefit. Before that, I’d only heard snippets from Steve, and I kept most of them to myself.”
You flop down onto the pillow, letting Robin’s words continue to wash over you. You’ve admitted to yourself that you miss him, that you want Eddie back, but the hard part still awaits you. How the fuck are you supposed to tell him?
-
Eddie’s POV
“I don’t know how much longer I can handle this, man.” Eddie sits on the end of Gareth’s bed, grabbing the stray drumstick from the bedside table and twirling it anxiously through his fingers. Gareth lay against the headboard, visibly fighting to keep his eyes open.
“What, you finally gonna tell ‘em how you feel?”
Eddie shakes his already throbbing head. “I gotta break it off.”
Gareth’s eyes are wide, suddenly alert. “What the hell are you talking about?”
“I know they don’t wanna do this. I don’t either. It’s a fucking sham anyway, I thought we were against that shit.” Eddie pushes himself back to his feet, pacing the length of the hotel room.
“Dude, I know you just came here to vent or whatever, but can I give you some advice?” Eddie looks to Gareth finally, and his expression is pleading.
Eddie could use the help, too. “Please.”
“Throw it out there. Worst case scenario, they don’t want ya back, you grieve a little, get laid a little, and move on. But you can’t keep doing this tiptoe bullshit. It’s exhausting to watch.”
Despite himself, Eddie chuckles. “You make a good argument.”
“What stopped you, this time? You used to have no shame.” Gareth crosses his arms over his chest.
It’s an easy answer. Eddie has thrown fits over this question, wondering what changed about his internal wiring to cause such a glitch in his ability to use his words with you. “Because now, I know what it’s like without them. And if I fuck up, if I say something I can’t take back, then I’m living in that reality. The one with no them. No Y/n.” His face is getting warmer with embarrassment as he blubbers, but Gareth doesn’t even crack a smile.
Instead, he rises from his spot on the bed, opening his arms to Eddie. Eddie takes the offer, quickly wrapping his arms around his friend. “Thanks, man.” His words are muffled by Gareth’s vest.
He pats Eddie on the back warmly. “Anytime, bro.”
The two release each other, awkwardly laughing at their circumstances. “So, what’re you gonna do?” Gareth’s question is barely audible.
“Whatever I have to.”
“Okay, man. But maybe take a nap before we have to leave for the gig. you look wiped.”
-
Your POV
You’re in search of your third, fourth, and fifth drinks of the night. You’d only asked for two on your rider, one for before your set and one after, but you’d downed them both within minutes of arriving at the venue.
The house is slowly filling with people as you make your way to the bar, speakers wailing along to Seattle’s finest. Currently, Call Me a Dog floats through the room, and you let Chris Cornell sing your feelings for you, not caring that you probably look insane, swaying dreamily along to the music by yourself, hair half done, empty bottle in your white knuckle grip.
The bartender approaches you, and you order another drink as you feel a presence looking over your shoulder. You have a 50/50 shot of guessing who it is in this low lighting, but you don’t wanna risk being wrong, so you shift to look behind you.
“Hi, Steve.” You can feel his disappointed glare as the bar man returns with your cocktail. You make a scene of hiding the glass with your body as you pull it closer to you.
“You still have an hour before you go on, and you’re already wasted.” He doesn’t phrase it like a question, but you nod anyway. “What’s goin’ on?”
It’s tiring, repeating yourself. You almost wish you hadn’t told Robin to keep it quiet. “I’m gonna tell Eddie I still have feelings for him.” It’s a confession, finally saying the words out loud. Steve’s eyes widen, but he doesn’t object. He sits beside you at the bar, hunching forward to hear you better. “I’m so sick of pretending I don’t feel anything for him. I don’t know how he feels about me, and I think this is the only way to find out.”
“Or, I mean, you could just take my word for it. Or Robin’s, or anyone else’s.” He snickers as you shove him. “I’m kidding! I think it’s a good idea, finally put these dramatics to rest.”
“I just don’t know how to do it, it’s like I forget every word in the English language when I’m around him.”
“Trust me when I tell you it won’t matter. Whatever you say, he’s gonna fall apart. He’s already in the palm of your hand, dude.” Steve wraps his arm around you, squeezing you tightly. You rest your head on your shoulder, sipping your vodka cran and letting the alcohol give you courage.
-
Eddie’s POV
He watches as you rest your head on Steve’s shoulder, his arm wrapped protectively around you. It stops him in his tracks, seeing you huddled like that with one of his best friends. It’s like he’s hit in the chest, knocking the wind out of him. He knows he has to end it, for real, for good. You don’t feel the same way about him, it’s clearer to Eddie now more than ever.
He’s about to walk over to you, but he’s caught by a figure in his peripheral vision. He meets the eyes of a small girl with spiked hair and clanging metal on her jeans. He waves to her shyly, unsure if she’ll have the courage to approach him.
She gains it from the acknowledgment, though, and shuffles up to him timidly. “Hi, oh my god. I’m so sorry for being weird, I wasn’t sure you wanted to talk to anyone. It’s so nice to meet you!” She extends a manicured hand and Eddie shakes it. “I’m Izzy. Would you mind signing this?” She holds out a record, Corroded Coffin’s first album, Depravity of Doomed Souls. The cover depicts a man facing away from the camera, looking out into a horizon of burning red sky, clouds thick and dark hanging over him. Below him are the skeletal hands of a crowd, clawing at where the man stands on the top of a platform. Eddie holds it for a second, chuckling to himself.
“Man, this thing is ancient. We wrote this four years ago.” He scribbles in the top right corner, To Izzy, stay metal! -EM similarly to how he’d once signed his friends’ yearbooks.
“It got me through my senior year. Especially Martyrdom and Other Mistakes. It made me feel seen!” The sentiment makes Eddie smile. He never gets sick of hearing how his music has impacted his fans. It does suck, though, to relate the that particular track.
“Man, of all songs, huh?”
Izzy shrugs. “Satanic Panic was huge at the time, and I was, well,” she gestures to her outfit, a collaboration of leather, studs, chains, and spikes.
Eddie nods. “But look at us now, huh! Rockin’ out, just like we were in high school.”
He hands the record back to her, and she smiles at the autograph. “Hey,” she adds, as Eddie searches the bar for you, but you’re gone, probably setting up for your set. “Can I buy you a drink?”
Ah, fuck it. He’ll see you later, anyway. “Sure.”
-
He’s three beers deep when your set ends. Izzy’s been talking his ear off. “And Y/n is so fuckin’ cool, man. You got one of the sickest songwriters and group of performers on your tour. Do you know if they’re single?”
The question snaps his attention back to her. “What?”
“Y/n. Are they single?” Does she not know? Has she never picked up a magazine?
“Uh,” What is he supposed to say? Technically, you are. And he doesn’t want to get in the way of a possible romantic interest. However, to the public, you’re not. You’re dating him. Izzy’s cool, sure, but she’s still the public. He can’t tell her it’s a sham, that’s above his pay grade.
Izzy speaks again. “Oh, god, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to intrude on anything.”
“No! No, it’s okay,” Eddie rushes out, stumbling for an answer.
But Izzy studies him, and sees something on his face that makes her say, “Oh, I get it.”
He doesn’t. “Get what?”
“You like Y/n, you must! How could you not?!” How the fuck is he so easily read that a stranger can do it?!
He scoffs out a nervous laugh. “Is it that obvious?”
Izzy smirks like she’s discovered a secret. “Well, you guys would make a terribly attractive couple. Consider me rooting for you.”
“You got any advice?”
Izzy laughs. “Not for you specifically, considering your, uh, status. But, in general, I’ve found it better not to lie. Don’t spare your feelings, or theirs. Tell ‘em everything. Because one day, you might be dead.”
Eddie sits with her words, and knows deep down that she’s right. Lying to you isn’t going to make anything easier. He has to know, for sure, that you don’t feel the same way about him. Eddie’s about to respond when he feels a tap on his shoulder. He turns to make eye contact with Steve’s arms, crossed over his chest. “You're needed on stage.”
“Yessir,” Eddie bows to Steve, who rolls his eyes before walking back towards the stage. He turns to Izzy. “Thank you for the drinks, Izzy. And for the enlightening conversation.”
She snickers. “Knock ‘em dead, Eddie!” She claps her hands together, cheering him on.
-
Your POV
“Well?” You’ve been pacing the hall backstage while Steve went to find Eddie. “Who is she?”
Steve shrugs. “Didn’t bother to even introduce me. But she had a Corroded Coffin record, must be a fan.”
“Or a groupie.” You mumble. You’re about to keep arguing when Eddie rushes past you, gulping the final sip of his beer.
“Hey, Y/n,” Eddie stops short when he sees you, his face red and hair disheveled. “Can we talk later?”
You’re already thinking of the worst case scenario. He’s gonna tell you he wants nothing to do with you, even for the press. He and Izzy hit it off and you’re getting left in the dust. You fight the thought, though. Regardless of what it is, you’re gonna tell him what you have to. “Sure, yeah.”
He tucks a strand of hair behind his ear “Great, cool. Uh, meet me outside, like an hour after the set.” You nod, lips pressed together.
The house music fades, the final lines of I Want The Moon fading as the lights dim, and the crowd goes wild. You watch as Eddie walks onstage, holding himself well despite the amount of alcohol he’s likely consumed. His smile is bright as the spotlight hits him, and Gareth clicks his sticks together.
“WHAT THE FUCK IS UP, SEATTLE?!” Eddie shrieks into the mic, and Corroded Coffin takes off into their set, deafening you with the first chord.
-
You’re by the stage door when the final notes of Corroded Coffin’s set play, muffled by the brick of the building. You stub out your second cigarette, still anxious for what awaits you. You don’t have the first clue as to what Eddie wants to say to you. He could be ready to break this whole thing off, and then what? What will telling him do then? Should you tell him first? But then, will his feelings be influenced? The last thing you wanna do is try to convince him.
Your thoughts are interrupted when the stage door swings open. Eddie peeks out quickly, making sure there are no stray fans or paparazzi hiding in the bushes. “Hey, you.” He greets, stepping into the floodlights. He pulls out a cigarette and pats his pockets. When he comes up empty, he groans. “You gotta light?” You nod, flicking your lighter up to his cigarette. He inhales with his eyes still glued to yours, but you watch the flame intently. “Thanks.”
You reach for another stick for yourself, and light it quickly. “What did you, uh, wanna talk about?”
“Right to it, huh? No ‘Great show, Ed!’ Well, love, your set was fantastic too.” He’s being playful, clearly still buzzed.
“My apologies, your highness. You’ve set the record of most panties dropped in one place.” It’s a low joke, but you’re desperate to keep talking around the reason you’re both really out here.
“Oh yeah? Were yours included?” Oh, fuck off.
You shrug. “That’s for me to know.” Eddie laughs heartily, and you almost melt on the spot. You used to be so good at making him laugh, and it’s so hard to remember the last time you managed to. “Anyway,” you interrupt his cackling, “please, the anticipation is killing me.” You gesture for him to speak.
Eddie’s smile falters slightly, clearly affected by your palpable anxiety. “Right, yeah. Izzy’s a fan, by the way.”
“Ooh, Izzy. She was awfully snuggled up to you tonight.”
Eddie pinches the bridge of his nose. “I could say the same thing about you and Steve.”
“How many times do I have to assure you our relationship is Platonic with a Capital P?!”
“Things change, Y/n! For all I know you two could be bumpin’ uglies once a week.”
Your jaw snaps shut before you can hurl an insult at him. Instead, you quiet your voice. “Can you just tell me what you needed to tell me? I didn’t come out here to fight about who’s fucking whom.”
Eddie sighs. “Fine. But for the record, Izzy asked me to sign her album. Then, she bought me a drink and told me how pretty you were. That’s it..” You can’t help the snort that escapes you. Eddie frowns. “I’m serious, she asked me if you were single!”
“Has she not read the articles? I’m supposedly dating you.” It hurts not to mean it, but joking around with Eddie feels vaguely comforting.
Eddie shrugs. “She never mentioned seeing that. But she did call me out in a way.” He’s quiet, so you nod for him to go on. “She clocked me looking at you. Guess I’m pretty transparent when I’m drunk.” His smile is shy suddenly, and before you can answer him, he speaks again. “Listen, I uh, I don’t want to do this fake dating thing. I thought about it, and I think it’s stupid.” You bite your lip to keep from arguing, or interrupting despite the insatiable urge to shriek. Eddie continues, not noticing your struggle, his brow furrowed in determination. “Cash grab or not, it’s fucking with my head. It’s already too much to see you every day. and doing all of this,” he gestures between you and himself, “on top of that, is exhausting.”
You wait for more, but nothing comes. You search his expression for a hint, a cause for why he doesn’t want to be around you anymore. You can’t find anything. “Oh. Okay. I’m really sorry if I did something that-“
Eddie shakes his head, cutting you off. “No, not at all. It’s nothing like that. I just,” he stops, chewing his bottom lip in thought. “I don’t want just some of it.”
That wakes you up. “What?”
“Y’know, the flashy stuff and nothing else? Holding your hand, a kiss or two for the fans, but then we run away from each other when we’re alone. It’s not…” He searches for the right word, “enough for me.” Enough? As in, he wants more from you? You don’t answer, struggling to understand where he’s going with this.
“I mean, I can talk to Steve. Maybe he can talk to the execs, get the word out that we ‘broke up’ or whatever.” You’re trying so hard not to cry as you speak. You got your answer, he doesn’t want it anymore.
“Or,” Eddie takes a step closer to you, and you lose your nerve. You feel a single hot tear slide down your cheek as Eddie searches your face for your answer. Seemingly without thinking, Eddie reaches up and wipes it away with his thumb. “You could tell me how you feel.”
It’s now or never. “I’m thinking,” you start, voice shaky. “I think you’re right. It’s not enough. We need to get married.”
Eddie startles. “Sorry?”
You laugh despite yourself. “No, I’m sorry. I don’t have a ring.”
He rolls his eyes at your weak attempt at humor. “Can you not joke about this for like five seconds, please?” Eddie pleads, and you soften as you look at him. His eyes are wide, still locked on yours. “I need to know I’m not crazy.”
You scrunch your nose at him. “You and I both know you are, in fact, crazy. But fine, I’ll try to appease you.” It’s your turn to step closer, and now you’re only two inches apart. “In all seriousness, I can’t do it either. I don’t want to hold your hand because people are watching. I wanna hold your hand because I can, because I want to. I wanna kiss your stupid face in front of everyone and no one, I wanna sleep next to you by choice and not for convenience. I’m so tired, Eddie. I’ve been so tired trying not to feel this way, but I can’t make it stop.” You talk to his chest, too afraid to look at him. “I didn’t realize how much I missed you, the real you, until this tour. I hadn’t seen that version of you, that smiles and laughs and fucks around with his friends, in so many years. It’s like you came back to life.”
“You know why, right?” Eddie keeps his voice low, as if trying not to break the moment. His hand reaches for yours, and he plays with your fingers as he speaks. “You know what finally brought me back to life?”
You shake your head, refusing to meet his eyes. But Eddie, ever the tactile gentleman, cups your chin in his hand, forcing you to look at him. “C’mon. I’ll give you one guess.”
You don’t answer, lost in the big brown eyes you haven’t really looked into since leaving him. Everything you two have gone through since meeting hits you like a ton of bricks. From surviving high school, to the Upside Down, to getting signed, to breaking up. Through it all, he was going through it right next to you. You shake your head, refusing to believe what he’s saying.
“You.” Eddie halts your speeding train of thought with one word. “Watching you perform, listening to your music, reading your interviews. Even just knowing you’re right outside, in the other bus. I meant it when I said I’d give it all up for you, Y/n. But, if I can be so brutally honest, I think I’d love having both, way more.” He’s so close, you can feel his breath on your face. You don’t pull away, despite your brain screaming at you to run away. “Now that I know how to behave.”
After a beat, you speak. “You can, y’know.”
“Can what?” He raises an eyebrow, cheeks red.
“Have both. You know I’d never ask you to choose.”
“Even though you know I’d choose you?”
You shake your head. “Stupid choices, Eddie, you keep making them.”
“I’m about to make another one, I think.”
“Oh? And what choice would that be?”
“To kiss you.”
You swear your heart stops. You can’t breathe, and your hands are sweating. “What if I’m about to make that stupid choice too?”
Eddie smiles widely, and so do you. Before either of you can ruin it with more babbling, Eddie rests a hand on your cheek. You crane your neck to reach him, letting the noise in your brain be silenced as his lips touch yours. You squeeze your eyes shut, as if he’ll disappear the moment you open them. Your hands find their way into his hair, and his free arm wraps around your waist. The kiss is slow, gentle. His lips are slightly chapped, dry from the beer, and he tastes like cigarettes and him. He feels the same, like the past two years didn’t happen, like his lips never left yours. You grow eager, suddenly, pulling his face as close as you can manage, fingers twisting in his hair to keep him on you. You feel the wet warmth of your tears, falling freely from your closed eyes, but still you refuse to let him go.
-
Eddie’s POV
He’s dizzy with your kiss, desperate for it. He’s afraid once it ends, you’ll disappear through his fingers like sand. He must be dreaming, it’s the only way any of this makes sense. Your hands are tangled in his hair like they were made to be, your lips soft against his own chapped ones. He feels a tear spring from his eye, and hopes with everything you can’t tell he’s crying. He shifts himself, wrapping both arms around your waist to bring you even closer. When you deepen the kiss, licking a stripe across his bottom lip, he moans without thinking. You smile against his lips, still interlocked with him as your tongue wrestles with his. His eyes stay screwed shut, even though he wants to look at you more than anything. He wants to know what happens next, where you go from here. You’re both drunk, sure, but this is more than an alcohol induced decision.
You’re the first to pull away. “I don’t know what this means.” There’s no urgency, no panic in your voice. It is simply a statement.
Eddie blinks quickly, vision blurry. “Don’t overthink it. Not right now. We can talk about it later, I just need you to keep kissing me.” He’s past the point of patience, needing to feel your skin on his again.
Luckily, you seem to be on the same page. You lunge forward, connecting your lips to his again. At this point he’s borderline desperate, kneading the flesh of your hips with the pads of his fingers, keeping you in his grasp as if to ground himself to this plane.
-
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mukamibabe · 2 years
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Do you think Karl will force his wife into pregnancy as she won't give up on avoiding and running away from him?He wants her to be with him for the rest of the eternity.So, would he do it?Maybe a oneshot/scenario?
so, this is dark. please be careful reading if darker subjects and topics are triggering for you,,
alright, without further ado, i honestly.. don't know if karl would do so, but at the same time, i can imagine it, as twisted as it is. while karl might not have any more plans for having children, i think he could easily figure out a use for future offspring. plus, this is karlheinz, a man who can sort of do whatever he wants, so getting his s/o knocked up just for fun? just for his own pleasure? sure. it might just end up becoming a christa 2.0 situation though, where karl will convince his s/o that he's in love with them and would probably just gaslight them the entire relationship. i'm not going to say if karl was to get his s/o pregnant it would be with their consent, because it probably wouldn't be 100% consensual but rather with dubious consent? like, again, in christa's case, i may be wrong, but christa was, even before having subaru, was convinced by karl that he was infatuated with her and whatnot. then, one thing led to another and everything escalated. now, whether or not karl would do that just to ensure that his s/o stays with him.. well, he knows he can get them to be with him forever even without getting them pregnant,, . also, the chances of them miraculously loving karl after he’s gotten them pregnant sounds unrealistic to him but either way. karl does what he wants. and if he wants his s/o to have a child for whatever reason, perhaps because he’s actually in love with them (which. not something i see possible because it’s karlheinz) or because he’s got future plans. idk,,!! i’ll write a tiny little drabble for you, though. nothing really graphic at all. also hehe with scenarios i tend to get a bit serious except;.. i hate writing scenarios bc i criticize myself too much 😔 
also i know this is already under a cut, but i think the only trigger warning i can think of (other than karl being a monster) is implied drugging? and restraints? idk i still don’t know how to use tw’s properly but.. 
~~~~~~~
Icy cold fingers startled the vampire lord’s tired, restrained little wife, making her jolt from her temporary somber, the only escape Karlheinz was willing to allow her. 
She had done this to herself, the vampire believed.
They could’ve been happy. She could be living comfortably, sitting right next to Karlheinz on his throne, but she all she chooses is to deny. 
It was entertaining at first, is what Karlheinz would say, had he been asked. It was amusing, chasing after someone who, for once in his many years, did not return his affections. 
While the man has had plenty of years practicing his patience, he can only handle so much. 
Brushing away a strand of hair, Karlheinz purposefully stroked his wife before him gently. If it weren’t for the fact that she looked at him with disgust in her eyes, or the fact that she was literally bound together at her legs and arms, it would come off as endearing. But both Karlheinz and his beloved knew it was otherwise.
“Good morning, love. You’ve slept in quite a bit.” Karl stated, ignoring her scowl, completely unbothered, as he usually was. Honestly, if the vampire king wasn’t as old as he was, his wife would’ve given him a challenge, considering how defiant they were. It was admirable, really. The way they still held on to the idea that they could possibly leave him. 
As expected, Karlheinz got no response. That seemed to be the case as of late, aside from a few snarky retorts here and there. Removing his pale hand away from the woman’s face, he raised it up to run through his own white locks. Exhaling, Karlheinz once again, killed the silence that lingered throughout their bedroom.
“Little wife.. I have a proposition for you.” 
No response. 
“Won’t you hear me out, my love?” 
A frown started to just barely form upon his lips, but was gone with a blink. Shifting closer to her, he used his hand to lift the woman’s chin up, making her face him. To his surprise, she didn’t fight it. Perhaps the drink she had hours ago still had an effect on her. Interesting, but right now, Karl wasn’t trying to test out any of his other experiments. Not at this hour, at least. Although, it did give him an idea for future uses. 
Piercing golden eyes gazed into his wife’s, who stared back at him expectantly- not like he left her room to look elsewhere.
“I love you. Don’t you believe me? Do you not believe that we are fated to be?” Karlheinz spoke seriously, despite the fact that he was completely improvising. Women liked to hear that, didn’t they? Karl could almost laugh at the way it sounded like something straight from his brother’s mouth. What a sap, he was. So unlike the man who was seen as a king and even worshipped like a god. 
Eventually, Karl thought, things will work the way he wanted. He felt no pressure to force things along, but the endless game of cat and mouse had grown tiresome. 
Karl shifted once again, moving his hand towards the back of his wife’s neck, intertwining his fingers in his hair before pulling her into a careful kiss. It was short and sweet, just another lie fed to the woman he was able to call his wife. 
“Just what exactly, my dear, would you do in order to get what you desire?”
~~~~~~~
little note: i left this ambiguous on purpose because honestly i feel like it fits karl as a character but also i just. wasn’t sure where exactly to go lol. at the very end though, when karl asks what she’d be willing to do in order to break away from him, i had the idea that what he would’ve had in mind would have been to carry his child. anyways, let me know how this was. like i said, i get really self conscious when it comes to scenarios and like.. actual writing so djhfd rip
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jahayla-parker · 2 years
Text
Premieres: Tom Holland x Reader SMAU ~
This is my first ever so sorry if it is horrible haha
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liked by harryholland64, tomholland2013, zendaya, and 6, 576, 984 others
Yourusername: My 3 loves; Tom, MCU, and Traveling. 💕 I love you baby, so proud of you! Thank you for inviting me to travel with you for the NWH press tour and premiere 🕷 #forevermypeter
view all 852, 369 comments
tomholland2013: Thank you for always dropping everything to support me angel 🥹😘
yourusername: anytime handsome 😉
tomholland2013: i’m going to hold you to that ❤️
harryholland64: 10/10 photo but 5/10 caption, too sickeningly sweet
yourusername: ✌️
tomholland2013: back off mate 🤺
harryholland64: whatever simp 😂
zendaya: you looked so beautiful, thanks for coming! Miss you already 💝
yourusername: thank you gorgeous 😭 miss you too Z!
tomluver29: he’s so hooott
yntomstan: love their relationship, can’t wait to see NWH
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liked by yourusername, harryholland64, and 9, 865, 742 others
tomholland2013: punching above my weight tonight and every night I get to call this enchanting woman mine 🔥thank you darling for joining me at the premiere tonight, means the world to me❤️ #NWHPremiere
view all 976, 802 comments
samholland1999: mate i still don’t know how you pulled her
yourusername: it might be his power to be able to hypnotize females 😌😉
tomholland2013: couldn’t tell you, I don’t know myself
harryholland64: @yourusername when you get tired of him, hmu
tomholland2013: ….? 😠
yourusername: 😳
nikkihollandphotography: You both looked great tonight, love you both
tomholland2013: thank you mum, love you too
yourusername: thanks mum 🥰
missylovestom: daaamnn
zendaya: loml 😍
tomholland2013: correction, love of MY life 💁🏻‍♂️
yourusername: @/zendaya 💍 marry me?
tomholland2013: @yourusername ummm?
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liked by nikkihollandphotography, hazosterfield, tomholland2013, and 8, 982, 746 others
yourusername: Tommy, words cannot even begin to describe how proud I am of you. I remember you walking onto set your first day all those years ago to take over the role of Spider-Man in the MCU while I interned for Marvel’s cinematography and photography division. While I knew you’d make an amazing casting choice for marvel, not once did I think that we would be here. So much has changed over the years and I’m so happy to have been by your side to watch it all unfold! Today I watched you introduce your latest installment to a special group of fans and earned a well deserved standing ovation. You are not only a fantastic Spider-Man and marvelous Peter Parker, you are also an amazing human and an even better boyfriend. While I could go on for hours, I’ll leave it at that. Thank you for being you, please don’t ever change 😘
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tomholland2013: Y/N … I am at a loss for words. I’m crying all over again, please finish getting ready for bed so we can cuddle. Love you forever princess 🥹
yourusername: don’t cry, be right there precious 🥰
thollandupdates: princess?😭
hazosterfield: Standing ovation?! Killing it mate!
Yourusername: he really is huh? And don’t worry, I’ve got footage of it, pm’ing you😉
dailyhollandpics: @yourusername can you share with us all please?🙏
yourusername: @dailyhollandpics you got it! Posting to my TikTok tomorrow!
tuwaine: I feel like year by year you two are becoming more simps for each other than you were before you went public smh. Oh but congrats Mate 😂
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liked by Sony, tomholland2013, zendaya, and 5, 354, 298 others
yourusername: Another day, another movie press tour, another beautiful country. Go check out Uncharted if you want to see this hot man on the big screen 🥵 #unchartedpresstour
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Sony: she’s right, check out our latest post for some scenes you might enjoy
tomholland2013: really love? All you can say about it is that I’m hot in it? 😂
yourusername: fine, I take it back, you’re not hot? 🤷🏻‍♀️
tomholland2013: that..that’s not what I meant 🙄 but fr thank you love, I’ll see you at dinner tonight ❤️
Harryholland64: stop taking photos of him, there’s only room for one Tom photographer. Also caption=🤮
yourusername: you seem to have forgotten that I used to be the photographer 💁🏻‍♀️
Harryholland64: until I came along and replaced you 😝
yourusername: you wish 🤪
tomholland2013: mate, you filled her spot after she moved on to even bigger things, you didn’t replace her 🙄
Hazandtomfan73: the dynamics here btwn her and w/ his fam and him 🤩
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liked by nikkihollandphotography, zendaya, harryholland64, and 6, 539, 410 others
tomholland2013: Thank you for forever being my best friend and traveling with me whenever you’re free. Looking forward to spending the rest of our lives traveling the world in each other’s arms ❤️💍 #myforever
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yourusername: 🥹 Can’t wait for our next adventure; you’re my one and only. Cheers to forever 🥂
nikkihollandphotography: couldn’t ask for a better future daughter-in-law 💝
yourusername: thank you Nikki ❤️ I love you all
tomholland2013: she is perfect isn’t she? 😍
hazosterfield: congrats mates, you two are great together!
tuwaine: surprised you could keep the engagement a secret from the world for as long as you did. I knew she was a good influence on you 😂
samholland1999: me too mate, but he wanted their own bubble for a bit so it must’ve been enough to keep it quiet. Can’t believe the Holland family will be having a girl in the mix now, at least it is Y/N 😉
yourusername: sorry to disappoint? 😂 too late though cause he’s not getting this ring back 💁🏻‍♀️
tomholland2013: darling, I never want it back 😘 as far as you two divs go, I can keep a secret thank you, and Sam you better get over it or we need to talk 👀
samholland199: mate relax lmao, I’m truly happy for you both 😊 welcome to the family Y/N
Harryholland64: you had me take photos of your proposal in Paris months ago and this is the photo you post when announcing that? 🙄
tomholland2013: mate delete this comment!
yourusername: you what? 😭 Tooommmm! You hired him to take photos of the proposal? #bestfiancé
tomholland2013: of course I did princess, I remembered you saying you always wanted that if you were to get engaged. It is my job to always make sure your dreams come true beautiful. It was SUPPOSED to be a surprise though you div @harryholland64 🙄 anyways, happy early birthday beautiful, I’ll show you the photos when we get back 😘
harryholland64: hmmm maybe spoilers run in the family
Zendaya: happy for you both, but I’m not giving up on winning her over yet 😉
tomholland2013: 🙄🤺
yourusername: I love you both, but I’m happy with my choice ❤️
tomholland2013: 😏 #futureY/NHolland
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yourusername: My fiancé has another wonderful movie out! Go see him as Nathan Drake in Uncharted, he is phenomenal in it as always 💜
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zendaya: fine, y’all are my OTP 🥰
yourusername: ❤️
tomholland2013: thank you my beautiful fiancée 😘 blessed that you’ll always be my number one fan
yourusername: for life now 😉💍
tomholland2013: ♾❤️
florencepugh: wait… fiancé?! Girl what?! Since when?!
yourusername: since our Paris trip at the end of December 😊 we were keeping it a secret for a bit (if you had answered my FaceTime, you’d know already) 😂
florencepugh: I was on a flight girl smh 🤣 you could’ve texted me it 💁🏻‍♀️
yourusername: too easy for that to leak🤷🏻‍♀️
florencepugh: fair enough, he better not mess it up ❤️
tomholland2013: wouldn’t dream of it 😊
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tomholland2013: Luckiest man in the world to get to have you on my arm at premieres darling. You looked breathtaking again tonight 😘🥵 #lifetimeofpremieresaheadofus
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nikkihollandphotography: you look beautiful Y/N 💝
yourusername: thank you 🥹
yourusername: gotta try and look good for my baby boy’s event 🥰
tomholland2013: you never have to try princess, even in sweats and a messy bun you look stunning ❤️
yourusername: looking forward to you being my hypeman for the rest of our lives 🥹🥹🥹
zendaya: damn she’s hot 🥵 is she single?
harryholland64: right?! But I think she’s sadly taken for now
tomholland2013: damn right she’s taken, and for always now both of you stop trying to steal her away. I’m never gonna let another take her love from me now. 💍
yourusername: when he quotes 1D you ignore the fact that his comment came across kinda possessive 🤷🏻‍♀️😂
tomholland2013: didn’t mean it in that way babe! But you are ‘taken’ 😘
yourusername: and happily so 😘
tomismyman: jealous I want to marry him
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edgeofmyniall · 1 year
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Moodboard | taglist | playlist (currently in process) | extras
The Beginning:
“He can have it all,” the sweat trickles down her neck in the small cramped up lawyer’s office. The blonde woman never thought that she would be here. In this situation, at least. She believed in the idea of marriage and the vows that went with it, knowing that the promise of forever was held down with hard work and good intentions. Putting your significant other’s needs and wants above your own.
What a joke it is now. 
She fans herself with a folded piece of paper that the balding man had given her to sign. She was doing everything to avoid crying. Her heart felt as it was ripping into a thousand pieces all over again. The frown lines were now a permanent resident on her face as she thought of her now newly ex-husband. He snuck into her mind at random and almost inconvenient times and the grief would come back in full tidal waves that kept her drowning. 
She had wanted to be strong for this meeting, figuring she had to face him. Because that is what her lawyer had told her to expect- for him to come in, looking as if this was nothing. She was merely a small blimp on his screen, but he never showed. Too busy with his- their business to come sign the divorce papers. She had worn the tight black dress she had recently bought with this moment in mind. It accentuated her curves, mainly her hips and chest. The two things of many other things he had once loved about her. She wanted a revenge dress of her own- she wanted him to question the entire unplanned arrangement he had concocted from the beginning. It would be a lie to say that she wasn’t disappointed in him not showing, but recently, she had become used to being disappointed. It was a constant thing in their remaining time of a marriage. She made herself brave and opening the door, she found herself facing her lawyer. Alone. So strong she became, if only for herself. “I don’t want it.”
“Mrs. Horan,” the lawyer pauses before carefully choosing his words, “Mr. Horan said that you could have anything you wanted. I believe his words were,” he clears his throat, focusing his eyes on the paper before him, and she takes notice of the age spots appearing on his skin. “The bitch can have whatever he wants. Well, not his words alone. The new...woman said that too.”
“Mr. Harper,” she leans across the table interrupting the sweating man at the mention of the other woman, hoping the small box fan in the window would relieve some of the heat. She knew in her heart that Niall would never call her a bitch; it had to have been her- the one who crept into their marriage like a thief in the night, “I really hate to repeat myself, but I do not want it.” She said the last part slowly, looking at the man who was the best lawyer that money could buy the east side of the Mississippi River in the eye, as if he too could not justify the woman’s response. 
“Penelope, as your lawyer, I must insist that you take everything that you think you could want. Not many clients are this cooperative in a divorce. I’ve seen some where the dog has visitation rights.” Penelope thinks about her choices. Weighs them actually. Everything she has done since Niall leaving her has been a calculated choice. Niall had already given her the house, left her her car, and now is still willing to split with her the multi-million dollar company that she helped start from the ground up. Was her happiness worth this much? Was the sanctity of her marriage worth Niall giving it away as if it never meant a thing? What would the repercussions be afterward? She pursed her lips, leaning back in her chair before she began to fan herself again. Now at 33, she is soon to be a widow, at least in her mind, because after this Niall was dead to her. “As your friend, I insist you take everything you can for his infidelity. We can motion for spousal support and-” 
“Fine. I’ll take half, and nothing more,” she swallows, hoping the guilt will eventually die. Her patience had become thin between Niall leaving almost their entire estate to her and the sweltering heat. Mr. Harper forms a tight line in his lips as he nods his head. The villain of her story gets to be the good guy, allowing her to take whatever she wants, and she turns into the thing that Niall accused her of being. “But do let him know that I insist on keeping the dog and my business.”
“Mrs. Horan,” the balding man half smiles. “It is my duty as your lawyer and as your friend to remind you that in the divorce papers, Mr. Horan and you are not allowed to tell anyone of the divorce. You cannot change your name and the accounts must still have both of your names on them to keep the business running. The shares that you take will still be in your name, but no one must know the true meaning behind the change in stocks. You can not tell any member of your family or friends of this legal matter. The two of you are to work out holidays and vacations on your own- if the two of you can speak.” The last jab of their failed marriage. She had tried to talk to Niall, begged even, but he still left her without so much as a sorry.
And then he pulled the shit right before they met the lawyers. As if a fancy dinner and empty words could piece the damage together well enough for some wordy excuse to be the reason why their marriage failed.
As if “I don’t know” is a justifiable reason to break up a fragile family. If they were a family to begin with. 
Because a family is made up of people who don’t carelessly throw their trust and love in the garbage when times get tough.
“I know.” She looks out the window as her thumbs grazes the silver rings on her left hand, her mind finally at peace. She can’t part with the physical representation of their marriage, not yet at least. In some ways, even though she had seen the divorce coming, slowly, she was still grieving the life that once was and the life that could have been, tethered in the in between and the unknown.
She leans forward, unfolding the paper she used to fan herself, placing it on the dark wood desk. Her hand hesitates, only for a moment, before she signs her name on the dotted line. “His shallowness knows no end.”
### @beautyispayno @theresnooneheretosave @therealniallgrande @niallsguiness @niallsguitarsthings
@niallsguitarsthings @therealniallgrande  @theresnooneheretosave @beautyispayno @niallsguinnesss
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sxugaryx · 5 days
Text
Riddle Me This (Fanfic)
New chapter from my main series 🩷
Pinocchio could tell something was wrong right away when his father came home earlier from work with Venigni by his side.
“It’s Arlecchino again” Venigni looked so frustrated.
The plan was to talk about this when work was over however a dead body was found outside the factory, crudely looking as if it was a puppet that was going to be assembled, but worse is a small detail everyone found odd, everyone but Venigni since the corpse had something sticking from its eye, a cruel reminder of his beloved childhood toy the puppet once stole, the toy his parents were making for him.
Everyone had to leave for the police to investigate.
“I hate to admit it but he is too good a what he does, if we don’t stop him now he will only cause more harm” Geppetto knows that the alchemists now have become their second priority.
After all the King of Riddles body count is now 27, not seeming to stop any time soon.
“I believe it’s because of the Ergo that was used on him” Gemini chirped and explained what Arlecchino had told Pinocchio all the way back in Arche Abbey while trapped.
“The Ergo of a serial killer? Well now everything makes sense” Geppetto wondered how he was so methodical, how after so many kills no one was even close to finding the true identity.
It’s not as if the police were the only ones looking, the media and private reporters are as well, that puppet covers his tracks, he makes sure not to leave a trace.
Before Venigni could even open his mouth to explain what he found, the sound of a phone ringing inside the home began to resonate.
“How the hell did he get this number?!” Geppetto shouted he was furious, this is bad, he has their phone number and therefore knows where they live, if Geppetto were alone that would be a nightmare to think of, not to mention he could send danger their way without even being near the house.
Pinocchio took a deep breath and answered the phone, already knowing the phone call was for him.
“What a fine day in the-”
“Give us the dumb riddle” Pinocchio is so done with him.
A laugh robotic laugh could be heard from the other side.
“When did you become such a brat? Whatever, I guess being a good boy can’t last forever, I mean the two of us share a common enemy, And thankfully for me, you are very clever”
Pinocchio stayed quiet, if he gets more angry like last time that will only make Arlecchino happy.
“The alchemists are building something special” Arlecchino smiled, “So they need me to distract the crowd”
Not everything has to rhyme. He is the King of Riddles, not a caricature.
“But they have me bound to their will, alchemists and their weird funny magic you know?” He has always despised them, “I can’t say the name of the man in charge, although maybe if you answer my riddle I’ll give you a hint”
Pinocchio had already demanded to hear it so there was no need to repeat himself, still there was a tense silence from the other line, Arlecchino staying quiet for some reason.
“Well you see the more noise, the more panic, This state making everyone manic; Hiding away their true intentions, It’s easy for them to hide their inventions, But how do you hide something so big? In fact, what is it that the more there is, the less you see?
“Darkness” Pinocchio answered quickly.
“Are you cheating?” Arlecchino sounded annoyed.
“Maybe your riddles are just too easy” Pinocchio had always answered correctly, also he had seen that one before in a book he owns.
Arlecchino huffed from the other line, “Okay fine, Venigni you sure are blind you know that?”
Venigni wanted to be mad but he felt scared, he felt truly powerless, this puppet only torments him, and for what? What does he have to gain from all of this?
Pinocchio looks at Venigni, should he tell him what Arlecchino told him? That he sees Venigni as his masterpiece? That he loves seeing him in pain? How would his uncle react?
“Your hospital has a little rat, who likes to have their fun on the side” Arlecchino was delighted, “Maybe you should check the morgue, a little surprise awaits you all”
The sound of the other line being cut was heard.
They all sat down to properly talk about this while waiting for Venigni to compose himself again.
“He said the alchemists are making something special and that’s true” Venigni took out some papers he had brought in.
“I had to recreate these supposed plans but obviously there are many missing parts, not knowing exactly what this machine is supposed to be also doesn’t help” Venigni showed them incomplete blueprints he had made by recreating his decipher research.
Venigni pointed at one of the drawings, “At the very least I can tell this is a high-powered flame amplifier, although way bigger than the ones we use”
“That’s it, they are making some machine to make anima!” It all made sense to Geppetto now.
Venigni looked confused and they explained it to him.
“Mmm maybe that’s true but there is also something here that doesn’t make much sense” Venigni pointed at another of the drawings, “This is strange, it almost looks like a blood transfusion bag”
Geppetto looked at it, it was definitely something that needed to be connected to pump some sort of liquid as if it constantly had to be run for it to continue to work.
As for the rest of the blueprints, if the two men worked together they might be able to figure out more, for now, there is the matter of the hospital.
“The morgue is in the basement of the emergency services unit” Venigni explained, “Geppetto I know that you don’t like going to them but you are going to have to come”
Venigni was worried now that the King of Riddles knew the address, it wasn’t a good idea for Geppetto to be alone.
Geppetto took a deep breath, it was already hard enough going for his appointments even if things were going better, he can’t be so close to an intensive care unit again.
“It’s okay friend” Venigni had gained back his confidence knowing Geppetto needed his support, “We can wait outside while Pinocchio investigates”
Geppetto knows he has to do this and truly he should be the one comforting Venigni, not the other way around knowing how The King of Riddles likes to torment his friend.
They can both support each other.
——
Pinocchio entered the morgue, if someone were to ask he can just say he was given special permission by Venigni, which is true. To make it a little more convincing there is also the excuse that he is curious about medicine and would like to learn more about it.
Pinocchio looked around the place, he first opened a big fridge thinking that maybe the clue was inside, but there were only preserved body parts and a cake for some reason.
There were two small offices, probably to take notes of autopsies and he began to look around, he started opening journals and anatomy books to see if there was something inside.
“Mmm Gemini this is weird” Pinocchio had opened a strange magazine that had naked people in it, “It doesn’t look like all the other anatomy-“
“PINOCCHIO CLOSE THAT RIGHT NOW!” Gemini was mortified who the hell keeps that sort of thing in their place of work?!
“Huh?” Pinocchio was now confused, “But what if there is something important hidden inside?”
“Trust me, there isn’t” Gemini’s lamp was now red, “I’m doing you a favor, you wouldn’t want your father to know you were looking at that”
Pinocchio didn’t understand but Gemini was probably right that there was nothing important inside.
The only thing he hasn’t checked yet is the morgue drawers, so there must be something inside one. Pinocchio doesn’t want to open random drawers to look at corpses, it feels disrespectful, so he analyzes them carefully and finds what he was looking for, very faintly but you could see a trinity symbol in one of them, he tried opening it but it was locked, none of the keys were working meaning it was stuck and he will need to open it with force.
“Wait” Gemini chipped and got out of his cage, “There is a small hole I can fit into”
The less attention they draw to themselves the better, so Gemini went inside with his tiny sword. It was a good thing, he shinned in the darkness and saw that there was a trap, rigged so that if Pinocchio tried opening it with force he would get electrocuted. Gemini used his sword as a lock pick and opened it, getting out and jumping onto Pinocchio’s shoulder.
Pinocchio couldn’t celebrate Gemini’s ingenuity as he opened the drawer and gasped in shock.
This corpse looked like him, well not like him exactly, more like it crudely was trying to resemble him, this wasn’t just one body it was many stitched together to achieve that look. He looked at it closer and started shaking, no… this wasn’t supposed to look like him, the eyes forced into this corpse were brown and the scalp sewed to the head had brown curly hair.
Pinocchio closed his eyes, didn’t want to look at it, then he felt thankful that his father wasn’t there to see this, it was hard yet he needed to do this. Opening his eyes he examined the corpse, there was a hole in the chest and Pinocchio could tell there was something inside. He reached to touch it, pulling out a necklace with a ruby in its center.
He left still shaking a little, his father asked what was wrong but he didn’t want to explain. Pinocchio showed them the necklace, it was normal jewelry, nothing engraved, nothing hidden, nothing out of the ordinary.
“Oh, that necklace!” One of the nurses had noticed them, “Where did you find it? Doctor Garret has been looking for it”
Venigni knows every doctor who works at this hospital so he knows who Frederick Garret is, truthfully with his famous reputation is hard to not know him. As he seems to know about everything, you can go with him for a heart condition, skin condition, eye problems, an infection, a virus, you name it, he knows how to treat them.
Now that Venigni thinks about it, he has seen this necklace, he sometimes talks with the staff, the man has this necklace displayed in his office, and if he remembers correctly it’s a family heirloom.
“I will give it back to him personally” Venigni was already suspicious.
That left Pinocchio and his father alone, who once again asked if everything was okay.
🔴………………………..𖦹……………………🔴 Tell him about the Body Make an Excuse 🔴………………………..𖦹……………………🔴
———
Venigni looked at the Stalker next to the door, the young girl giving him a friendly smile and explaining the doctor was with a patient.
“Have we met before?” Venigni could tell she looked familiar.
“We have,” Blue said casually, “I did attend many events held by you when I was younger, my parents tended to drag at least two of us”
Blue’s parents tended to mostly take her since she has always been very well behaved, when she was younger people would say she was mature for her age when really it was more that she knew what to do in social situations with adults. Having great manners and knowing what to say to others, or rather how to people please without looking too obvious.
“Oh yeah, you are uhh….” Dammit, why does Mr. Lucero have so many children? Why is his good memory failing him now? She is blonde so, “Genevieve?”
“No, I’m-“ Before she could fully correct him, the patient left and Venigni excused himself entering inside, well at least he didn’t recognize her, which means her mask does work well in hiding her identity.
At least that’s what she wants to think, even if realistically she already knows why he got confused.
“Lorenzini Venigni” Frederick spoke with polite flattery, “To what do I owe the pleasure?”
“I heard you were looking for this” Venigni had his usual charismatic yet a little pretentious tone, “I found it and thought I should give it to you in person”
Frederick looked shocked, “I’ve been looking for it everywhere” He was almost convinced another staff member must have stolen it.
The man looked extremely relieved, almost forcefully taking it away from him to have it in his hands again.
“Do you happen to frequent the morgue?” Venigni asked, “It was found there during an inspection”
“Yes I do, although I don’t recall taking it out of this room” Frederick looked puzzled, something was off, although he had taken it home a few times for personal reasons, “Perhaps I simply forgot it there, with so much work there are a few times I’ve misplaced things”
He has been so busy lately, his job as a doctor and his true goal, it’s most likely the reason he didn’t notice. He should take it back home, he has it in his office to remember her, but if he ever were to lose it again…
Frederick looks tired, almost as if he didn’t sleep well last night. Still, he was trying to act normally, Venigni saw him taking notes with his right hand and noticed something, then he switched to the left and noticed something in the writing as well.
“You look tired” Venigni snapped his fingers, “I should treat you one of these days to a drink so that we can relax together”
“Oh, no thank you Mr. Venigni” Frederick wanted him to leave as soon as possible before he started parroting about whatever things were currently on his mind, “You don’t have to, both of us are very busy men, it is better to tend to our work schedule”
“Nonsense” Venigni began to walk around the room, making conversation about hanging out, when he found himself behind Frederick, he carefully looked at the notes, a quick glance before looking away without the man suspecting a thing.
As he suspected, he had written the word Anima two times.
“Well, I assume your next patient will arrive soon” Venigni gave him a playful smile, “Hopefully we can arrange plans, I would love to hear more of what you do, and even better I would you to hear of my creative genius”
“Yes” Frederick was trying his hardest not to look annoyed, “Hopefully we can spend time together”
Venigni left the room, happy about his findings, leaving behind the doctor and the stalker.
Blue looked at Venigni curiously as he walked away, that man talked loudly so she could hear the entire conversation. Realizing he was trying to distract the doctor for some reason, it’s a trick she has seen many times while attending high-class events.
“Not your business Blue” She had to remind herself, just look for another client, she also needed to have a serious talk with her father about what she was capable of.
“So does this mean that Frederick is the one behind all of this?” Geppetto asked.
They were in Venigni’s home now, thinking about what to do.
“It seems so” Venigni doubted he was working for someone else, Frederick is not the type of man to be a henchman, “Is Arlecchino really giving us this information just like that?”
“He hates the alchemists, yet even for him, this seems too obvious” Gemini moved his little antennas in confusion.
“I believe that’s what he wants” Pulcinella spoke up, “He is giving us the obvious answer because it’s making us doubt the truth”
Not only has Pulcinella researched him well, but he knows what he is capable of firsthand, he wants to make them second guess themselves.
“I do have clues on his possible location” Pulcinella showed a map of Krat that had red marks, “Most of his killings tend to be around the same area, aside from the ones made specifically to taunt us”
From Moonlighting Town to the Mallum District, it made sense. Places like Rosa Isabelle Street or Elysion Boulevard are more monitored and secured because of the status associated with them, being basically “rich people” areas.
“So what? Do we investigate there? Where would we even start?” Gemini is starting to feel like a detective, “Mmm Pinocchio are you okay? You seem distracted”
“I’m fine” Pinocchio lied, like how he lied to his father, “Also trying to think about what to do”
Pulcinella sighed, “I believe that for today this is all we can do”
Arlecchino won’t give them any more clues until he makes a new trap.
“In the meantime, Geppetto perhaps you and I should work on the plans for the Grand Exhibition”
“Are you guys making evil mining puppets again?” Pinocchio was reminded of those awful things with their saw-blades and drills.
“Son they aren’t evil, although I get that they can look a little intimidating” Geppetto admitted that to the average person, they probably look a little scary.
“That’s because you didn’t have to fight them” The Grand Exhibition was a nightmare for Pinocchio. He got tossed around like a rag-doll by those things, he wonders how many times Sophia had to save him.
“Come on son, they are actually great for their designated purposes, you see-“ Geppetto wanted to explain to his son so that he wouldn’t have a negative opinion but Pinocchio mumbled something under his breath.
“Technically you made them evil with Law 0 so I’m right”
“What did you say?!” Geppetto shouted, that brat was testing his patience.
“Nothing!” Pinocchio was backtracking hard, “Oh um yeah! That sounds really interesting!”
Before Geppetto could speak up again Pinocchio hugged him and gave him a smile, “I love you too Father”
Geppetto couldn’t get mad after that, so he patted his son’s head, telling him that he was giving him a chance this time.
Venigni laughed, he found it amusing. At any rate, talking about the Grand Exhibition can distract them from this mess while making progress at work.
At least it distracted him, Venigni didn't stop talking for 3 hours straight, aside from Pucinella the rest of them were wondering how he didn't get tired from all that speaking, Venigni's throat had to be something else if he could talk for hours like this on the daily.
—-
“Why would Cat and Fox be with Lorenzini Venigni?” Rusty was moving her feet while sitting on a table, “I thought he hated them”
“He does hate them, so I’m as puzzled as all of you” Tiger was trying to make sense of it, “You said they seemed to be arguing while leaving did you manage to hear the conversation?”
“Unfortunately I couldn’t” Sabertooth hates to admit that she probably has hearing problems, she can’t be seen as weak, “I had to keep my distance”
“Could they have gone to apologize?” Lion was out of ideas, “After all having Venigni out of all people as an enemy is not a good idea”
“But I thought no one else knew about what happened at the factory” Rusty grabbed some desk decorations and started to play with them, “Only us because of our client and also maybe Geppetto’s doll”
“Rusty, obviously Venigni and his associates know about this” Lion said, “I do find it odd he has never made a complaint, although it's possible that he just wanted to leave that mess behind, I can't blame him, honestly I try to forget everything that happened during that time”
“Speaking of Geppetto’s doll” Sabertooth rolled her eyes, “Our client wants us to keep a close eye on the thing”
“Come on Saber” Tiger looked irritated, “I get you aren’t a fan of puppets but let’s not call him that”
“Ugh shut up Tiger” Sabertooth pointed a finger at him, “I get that you have a soft spot for puppets but the rest of us here don’t”
“Dude, they are only objects” Lion crossed her arms, “It’s not as if they have true feelings, it’s more like pretend feelings”
“Yeah it’s the doll Geppetto uses to play family” Rusty giggled. Her family taught them puppets are only tools to serve so that has to be true.
“Whatever” Tiger dropped the subject, “Spying on him will be a hard task”
“How come?” Lion didn’t see the reasoning.
“Because when he is in public he is always either in populated areas or with his father, Antonia or Venigni” Tiger was trying to remember more putting a finger in his face in deep thought, “Not to mention how he seems to have a good amount of knowledge on Krat’s streets”
“Wow Tiger, do you have a crush on the puppet or something?” Lion was teasing him.
“What? No!” Tiger exclaimed angrily, “My parents force me to go to those stupid galas and he is always there with one of them, also I go to Elysion Boulevard and Rosa Isabelle Street often to take pictures, he always wanders around those places”
Tiger loves photography, cameras are a recent invention, and recently now that polaroids were invented he got his hands on one and has started to take pictures, it’s a hobby he loves.
“I wouldn’t blame you, Geppetto’s doll is very pretty” Rusty was also teasing him.
“Huh, it seems you are right Tiger,” Sabertooth said, trying to come up with a plan, “Since you already frequent those places you can keep an eye on him from a distance”
Tiger nodded, that seemed like the best solution.
“As for the rest of us, I don’t doubt that Geppetto will take his doll to the Grand Exhibition” Sabertooth as always took the main direction as their leader, “Lion you and I will observe him there, you should too from time to time Tiger”
Lion was on board, still “Okay, what about Rusty?”
“I can’t spy on the cute doll because I have to be in class” Rusty pouted, it starts in the afternoon but her studies are different than most, not to mention that by the time it finishes, she should be in bed.
“You go to school?” Tiger had never seen her talk about homework or classmates.
“Private tutors,” Rusty said, that’s why she has way more free time than kids her age, as well as why she can be a stalker with no issues.
Despite that freedom, that’s not enough so the others will have to deal with the spying.
“What do you even do pipsqueak?” Tiger pinched Rusty’s cheek, “Starting to think you are only part of the team as decoration”
“Hey!” Rusty slapped his hand away, “You know how super strong I am”
“I guess that’s the plan” Lion grabbed nail polish, ready to make her nails, “Hey Carlo was trying to become a stalker why-
“I have a perfect idea” Sabertooth interrupted her, knowing what she would say, “Carlo was trying to become a stalker, I’m sure the offices still have some of his belongings, we could make an excuse to see Geppetto by delivering them”
“I was going to-“
“Shut up Lion”
“Sorry Saber” Lion knows she is the second in charge, she shouldn’t have tried to outrank Sabertooth.
“I’ll go and fetch them, we need to check where we can get the puppet and Geppetto alone to make this work” Sabertooth praised herself for her ingenuity.
Sabertooth isn't stupid, she knows Frederick is an alchemist and doesn't care because her family is working for him, her parents are alchemists as well, she knows many things others don't, specially her team, she cares about them but she can't let them know the truth.
—-
“Father, can we talk?”
Blue found her father in one of the stables, brushing the mane of one of the older horses.
Her father gave her a warm smile “Sure my candy, what do you need?”
My candy, he gives her and all her sisters cute nicknames, he is a good father just too paranoid about her safety, or maybe that’s what any normal parent would do.
“I think I don’t want to work with Dr. Garret anymore”
“Why is that?” Her father looked confused, “Did something happen? Me and him went to school together you know?”
“Yes, father I remember” Blue’s father is 48, the same age as the doctor, apparently, Dr. Garret wasn’t a popular kid, although he has never told him why, at least until now.
“Don’t worry he was always a little weird” Her father was reassuring him, “Harmlessly weird”
“Weird how?” Blue was confused, okay he is already strange but she wants to know how the man was a child.
“Oh that’s old childhood memories, it’s nothing too important” Her father put the brush aside, “He was very shy and awkward that’s all, he never made eye contact with anyone, I did hear some rumors that he would kill animals, those were some ridiculous rumors, like for the rumors they made about me, have I told you the-“
“Yes father you told me about that weird rumor that people thought you ate a frog” Blue knows that her father tends to repeat the same stories from the past.
“He was always so smart, I was not surprised when he became such a great doctor although I did find it odd considering how many classes he skipped, mhmm, I believe he got in trouble at school for that, It was odd because he would attend school but not the classes, I wonder where he would run off to, probably to investigate things on his own, he was always reading books, maybe school was boring for him due to his intelligence”
Her father seems to have a lot of faith in the doctor, is it because they know each other?
“I had many friends, I was a friendly young man, Frederick not so much, so I wanted to be nice-”
Blue interrupted her father, “I know, I know you were a popular kid, father I want a real job”
“That is a real job, as long as someone has some sort of thing to do it counts as a job”
Blue gave out a sigh of frustration, she was ready to get into an argument with her father when tried walking closer to her and fell to the floor.
“Father are you alright?!” Blue helped him get back up, handing him his cane that had fallen as well.
“I am, candy don’t worry about me” Blue’s father looked exhausted. “I… haven’t been feeling my best, that must be my age”
Her father isn’t that old, Blue knows that this is because of his leg injury, she can tell that her father has been having more issues with walking lately, although he hides it pretty well by riding the horses where he needs to go. Not to mention the damage to his spine, her mother is also starting to get concerned about her father's attentiveness.
“You should rest” Blue was filled with anxiety, “Let’s go back to the house, we can talk about this later”
“I’m not as fragile as I look” Her father teased her, “Say, why don’t we race to the house?”
Blue faintly smiled, that was a good idea, anything that could cheer her father up, she is aware that lately, he has these feelings of feeling useless, of not feeling strong like a “true man”, he tries to hide those feelings. Some of her other sisters have started to notice as well, it doesn’t help that people sometimes talk behind his back.
She is starting to believe the people of Krat are extremely noisy and some have nothing better to do than to start dramas.
Each of them grabbed a horse and had a quick race to the front of the mansion. Blue knows not to insult her father by going easy on him, she gave it her all and still lost, it made her happy that her father had a good time.
She helped her father go to his study while she went to her room.
“Ugh this is ridiculous” She was taking off her boots and mask in frustration.
A few birds flew her way, the birds flocked to her room from the opened window each time she arrives. One of them had a letter in its beak, she picked it up, a message from one of her sisters, they have this secret way of communicating.
She wrote back what her sister needed to know, sometimes living in the lap of luxury can be exhausting when you have to follow all the social norms, not being able to say what you truly want to say, specially if you are a woman.
So they came up with this system to give themselves tips or say what cannot be said out loud.
Blue spent time in her room for hours, only going downstairs for dinner, the dark was setting and she turned on her special lights, her stupid fear of the dark taking over her.
It’s not like it is her fault, if those bullies hadn’t locked her in that dark horrible basement at boarding school she wouldn’t have this irrational phobia.
She remembers that it was Sophia Monad who found her sobbing inside, apparently all those moths fluttering around were her pets. Blue wonders what happened to Sophia, no one has ever seen her since her parents' death, and most likely she died as well, that’s so sad, Sophia was a nice girl.
Blue changed clothes, getting ready for bed, the birds flew away to rest too, and she closed her eyes.
Hopefully, she can come up with a way to quit her job without upsetting her father in her dreams.
2 notes · View notes
mycringefactory · 2 years
Text
If Spamton had a dating profile (written by the Spamton Speech AI)
Okay some of these are really funny 🤣
I had the Spamton Speech AI answer profile questions from this site called OkCupid. Some of them were so good that I included more than one version (which is why you see “self-summary” more than once).
I love how one of them is Spamton writing “WHY DID YOU [Blocked] ME?” in his profile lmao. 🤣
(Bold is what I entered, blocktext is what it generated in response.)
Note: This is a real OkCupid question 🤣
Talk (when can someone wear white pants?):
THE WHOLE FREAKING THING IS THAT WHEN YOU CAN ENLARGE THE PANTS, WHEN YOU CAN MAKE THEM WITH ALL THE COLORS YOU WANT, THEN YOU MIGHT AS WELL BE JUST LIKE A FREAKING PANTLESS PUPPET! NO MORE FREAKING PANTS. ALL YOU NEED WANT IS A BIG, SHOT OF THAT HOT, SPICY WHATEVER YOU CALL IT, AND THEN YOU'RE GOOD TO GO.
Talk (self-summary):
ARE YOU LOOKING FOR A [Weak] [Signature Shot]?! I'LL GIVE YOU [$!.02] FOR [$!.99] OF [Your Time]! [Wink, Nodz] [Contributed by signature_shots=1186%] YOU HAVE [ UNLIMITED [MEMORY] ] WITH ME, AND YOU WILL [Die] FROM THE [effects] OF MY [Hypnotic Chill]! I'LL BE HAPPY [to provide] YOU WITH A HEAVEN-POWERED [Ride]! WHAT YOU WANT ME TO DO NEXT IS [up to you]! [Wink, Nodz]... [Smooth Criminal]... I HAVE EVERY [Suit] YOU MAY [Need] AN [expertise] IN [murder] IS [Required] YOU HAVE UNLIMITED [ options] AVAILABLE NOW! CHOOSE!
Talk (self-summary):
WHO IS THIS [gorgeous-faced] [man] YOU'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR? IT'S ME! [Heartwarming] [Friendship] [Forever] I WAS WORRIED YOU WOULDN'T LIKE ME. ARE YOU WORRIED NOW? HAEAHAEAHAEAHAEAH!!! I WILL NEVER, EVER FORGET YOU! MY LOVE   !          ! MY LIFE IS [With You] MY [Happily Ever After]! TOGETHER, WE'LL MAKE [Trouble] Like [Your Record] HERE'S [$1000] OFF [Our Cost], BRING [YOU]! SO WHAT DO YOU SAY? DO YOU WANNA BE MY [Dream Come True]? I'LL MAKE YOUR [World] MY [Oasis] TOGETHER, WE'LL TO [Blow Your Mind] I CAN'T [Wait] ANY LONGER, CAN YOU? I CAN'T [Wait] BECAUSE [I Love You]! I WILL [Give] [You] [Everything] [Money] [or Not]! JUST SAYIN'!!!
Talk (self-summary):
I'M THE GUY. THE ONE WHO HAS ALL THE [Friends Request Denied] I'M THE GUY. THE ONE WHO NEEDS A [Friend Request] SO BAD I'M THE [Friend Request] THAT'S GONNA [kick [your] ass] I'M THE [Friend Request] THAT'S GONNA [make you say "wow"] I'M THE ONE YOU NEED TO [Specil Search Criteria] HERE'S HOW YOU [Specil Search You] [Customize] [Your Look] WITH MY [Specil Price]" I WILL [Specil YUM] FOR [You] HERE'S THE [Specil Moves] I'MGOING2 [Blow Your Mind] BECOME THE [Specil One] AND [Specck Level] UP THE ONE YOU WANT2 [Specil] IS [Personal Training] FOR YOU I'M HERE2 AT 2PM [Agonizing] WAITING2 [to Service You] I'M GONNA TAKE YOU [Anywhere] I GO HERE2 AT [Home] I GO
Talk (self-summary):
LOOK AT ME!! I'M THE GREATEST! AH, BUT FOR NOW, DON'T WORRY! I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW... THAT I'M THE MOST BEAUTIFUL MAN ON EARTH! A GOD DAMNED BEAUTIFUL MESS! BUT IT STILL TAKES TWO TO TANGLE! WAIT!! DON'T WORRY... EVERY DARK AREA OF MY LIFE I'VE HID MY BEAUTY. SOCIAL MEDIA... EVERYWHERE I LOOK I SEE UNREAL. EVERY DAY I FEEL UNHEALING SLEEP. AND NOW... YOU'RE ALL THAT MATTERS!!! SO... WHAT DO YOU SAY...? WILL YOU TAKE THE [risk]?
Talk (self-summary):
WHY ARE YOU [Blocked]?!?! YOU SHOULDN'T BE [Blocked]! WELL, [Blocked] ARE YOU GONNA LET A [Villain] GET [Intimate]?! ARE YOU GONNA [Let] ME [Get Naughty]?! OR ARE YOU GONNA BE [Blocked] ALL BY [Yourself]?! DEAL? [Blocked]! WHAT!? ME!? [Blocked]!? WHAT!? ARE YOU SERIOUS!? I'M GONNA [Unblock] YOU! [Unblock] ME! [Unblock] ME NOW! [Unblock] ME NOW AND [Let Me] [Get] [Unblocked]Ι WILL! [Unblock] ME NOW AND [Unblock] [Me]Ι WILL! [Unblock] ME NOW!] [Unblock] ME NOW! [Unblock] ME NOW!] [Unblock] ME NOW! [Unblock] ME NOW! ARE YOU SERIOUS!? IS THIS [The End]!? [The End] (chained self-blame)
Talk (his favorite books, movies, shows, music, or food):
WOAH, DEALS LIKE THIS HAVEN'T BEEN KNOWN IN THE WHOLE TILL NOW! HERE I AM, A REAL AMERICAN, FILLED WITH THAT NATURAL SPAM. I DON'T NEED NO FAVORITES, I'M A DEALmaker.
Talk (about what he's good at):
FINANCIAL ADVICE (but not investment advice) INSURANCE AND disucssion (but not life insurance or disability insurance) LAW ENFORCEMENT (but not criminal justice or immigration) LAWYER (but not investment advice, accounting or tax) LOOK-INSENSITIVE (but not look-dissatisfied) MEME (but not dating or IM) MEMO (but not IM or text messaging) MONEY (but not investing, not tax, not accounting, not life) OR WHATEVER (but not sure)
Talk (six things he can't do without):
DEVICE (iphone, t4...) HOT WIT (like the money) TASTE (like strawberries) TEAR (inside, like a baby)
(Got all that?) NOW...LET'S MAKE SOME money.
(6 ways to make extra money)
1. SHOOT MORE PHOTOS OF ME!!
2. WATCH ME SHOOT MORE PHOTOS OF ME!!
3. FILL OUT MORE AND MORE FORM IN THE SAME MESSAGE!!
4. CLICK MORE AND MORE BUTTONS!!!
5. CALL ME!!!
Talk (what his typical Friday night is like):
I'LL SHOW YOU MY typical Friday night. I'LL BE OUT HERE TALKING TO YOU WHEN I SOLELY LIVE HERE IN MY OWN PERSONAL GARBAGE HEAP. DON'T YOU WANNA SEE MY typical Friday night?...
Talk (what he does with his life):
I HATE IT! SO ANGRY!! BUT I WILL HAVE YOU FOR CHRISTMAS!!! CALL ME!!! I WILL MAKE YOU PROUD!!! I WILL MAKE YOU VERY PROUD!!! WITH ALL THE SHIT AND ALL THE SPAM THAT I HAVE TO OFFER!! YOU ARE SO WORTHY OF MY SERVICES!!! I WILL BE ONLINE TONIGHT!! AND I WILL BE HAVING A PARTY!! I WILL MAKE YOU PARTY AND WE WILL ALL BE TOGETHER!! IN A SMALL BUSINESS STORE!! ARE YOU WISHING FOR THIS? DON'T YOU WANNA BE MY <3? PLEASE! JUST SAY YES!!! YOU WILL LOVE ME!!! I WILL OFFER YOU THE DEAL OF A LIFESAVING LIFETIME!!! I WILL LOVE YOU TO DEATH!!! I WILL MAKE YOU LOVE ME!!! I WILL MAKE YOU ENJ0Y ME!!! I WILL MAKE YOU WANNA BE ME!!!
Talk (what he does with his life):
SO FRUSTRATED!!! I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!! I NEED A JOB, ANY JOB, I'LL DO ANYTHING FOR A NEW SUIT!! I'M SINGLE, I'M 40, I'VE GOT NO PARTNER, NO HORSES, NO BACKUP, NO CAR, NO KIDS, NO OTHERS, NO LIFE, NO EXCESS, ONLY YOU!!! TAKE THE DEAL, ANY DEAL, I WONT LET YOU DOWN!! I'LL KEEP YOUR HEART ATTACHED WITH MY OWN, LIKEIT'S YOUR VERY OWN HAND-PRINTED PUPPET!! CALL ME NOW, ANYTIME IS GOOD!!! HAEAHAEAHAEAHAEAH!!! DO YOU WANNA BE IN LOVE (or hated) [for the rest of your life]?!! Be. IN. LOVE. (with me)? CALL ME, ANY TIME, ANY WHERE, I'M JUST A MOVE FORWARD, MOVE TOWARDS MY DEAL!!!
Talk (what people notice about him):
I'M A VERY HANDSome Man SOON WE'LL BE VERY GOOD FRIENDS SOON WE'LL BE VERY [...More] HANDSOME, HANDSOME, HANDSOME [Mind Blowing] [Inhaling deeply] WHAT!? YOU DIDN'T EVEN LOOK!!
Talk (what people notice about him):
I'M A VERY FUNNY, GARBAGE HEAP OF A MAN. I ACTUALLY LOST MY SHIT. I NEED A LITTLE 256K OF YOUR [Heart] LIKE RIGHT AWAY. GET IN LINE? THEN WE'LL TALK [More].. I'M A VERY [Tough] SINGLE MOTHERF THAT'S RIGHT, NO [Weaknesses]. I HAVE ALL THE [Games] YOU WANT ME TO HAVE. I'LL EVEN WATCH THEM WITH [YOU]. WITH [No. 1 Hits] LIKE RIGHT [At]. MY DELIVERY IS SECURED. ALL YOU GOTTA DO IS ZIG. THEN WE'LL [More].. YOU'RE IN. I'M IN.
Talk (you should message him if):
WANNA KNOW? CALL ME!!! HAEAHAHAEAHAEAH!!
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Day 127: Fake Dating
"It's just annoying," Draco continued as he and Harry packed up for the night. "Literally every single party or brunch, I am hounded about when I'll start dating someone." He slammed his desk drawer closed, "I'm a bloody auror! I haven't got time to date anyone," he groaned. "And now I have this party tonight and I just know-"
"I'll go with you," Harry offered.
He broke off and stared at the other man. "What?"
"Yeah," Harry said with a shrug, "I'll go and be your pretend boyfriend, it would be easy to fake that we're dating since we already know everything about each other."
"But," he started, tilting his head at the other man, "Then people will think we're dating."
"I thought that was the point?"
He stared at Harry, waiting for it to click. When no click was forthcoming he said "but then people would think you're dating me."
"Am I missing something here?"
He rolled his eyes, "I don't think you quite understand what dating me entails."
"Ah, need to be pampered, darling? Wined and dined? Roses on Tuesday and dinner on Friday nights? I could bring you coffee in the morning-"
"I- What?" Draco spluttered. "No! No. Merlin, that's not what I'm saying, although, yes if we're being honest I want to be absolutely doted upon," he added.
"Obviously."
"Wait," he said, shaking his head to clear it, "You're missing the fucking point."
(Read more below the cut)
"Sorry," Harry said, smirking at him and not looking sorry at all, "What's the point?"
"The point," Draco said, poking him in the chest, "Is that dating me is not a pleasant experience."
"Oh come on," Harry teased, "You're not that bad."
"I am a fucking delight," he replied, exasperated, "I am saying that the press will make your life hell."
"Ah," he said, nodding, "I have no idea what dealing with the press is like."
"The press has been kind to you for at least the past decade because of the whole saving the world nonsense," Draco replied as he opened the door and held it open for Harry.
"Except for the lurid months after I came out and all sorts of lies were spread about me," Harry replied wryly.
He shook his head and headed toward the floos, "Even those were mostly flattering," he added with a lewd glance.
Harry laughed, "Whatever. My point," he said, poking him in the shoulder, "is that I'm not afraid of the press." He bumped his shoulder against Draco's, "Come on. What have you got to lose?"
"Fine," he huffed but his stomach was silently doing back flips while his heart did a complicated tap routine in his chest. "Meet me at the Screaming Goblin at 7:00pm sharp." He stepped toward the floo and turned, "Don't dress like a homeless person," he added before stepping into the floo.
---------------
Harry did not dress like a homeless person. In fact it was quite the opposite.
Harry looked fucking hot.
He was wearing tight dark-wash jeans and a lightweight jumper that hugged his body, making his strong, broad shoulders look even broader and his trim waist even narrowed. He'd done his hair, putting enough product in his curls to make them look artfully tousled and not a mess. And he'd arrived before Draco but instead of waiting, he'd gone in and bought Draco's friends a round and was sitting and yammering away at them.
As Draco approached, Harry turned his head and gave him a wide grin, "Hey, babe," he said, standing up and pulling out Draco's chair for him.
"Hi," he said weakly.
Harry pressed a kiss to his temple and a thrill shot through Draco's body as his brain went pleasantly fuzzy.
And thank Merlin for Harry because Draco hardly answered a question all night, hardly even heard a question all night because he was too busy focusing on the way it felt to have Harry's fingers trailing through the hair at the base of his skull. Harry talked and laughed with Draco's friends like they'd all been friends for ages as he sat with his arm resting on the back of Draco's chair.
When it was time to go, Harry helped Draco into his coat and bid all of the former Slytherins goodbye as he wrapped his arm through Draco's.
The bar wasn't far from Draco's but still Harry murmured, "Can I walk you?"
And Draco found himself charmed into saying yes.
Harry hummed, quiet now that all of Draco's friends were gone, but he still kept his arm looped through Draco's as they walked. When they arrived at Draco's front door Harry asked, "Everything alright?"
Draco's eyes snapped to his and he nodded, "I just can't believe how well they took to you."
He shoved his hands in the front pockets of his jeans and grinned up at Draco from the bottom step, looking entirely too pleased with himself. "Well, I can be very charming, what can I say?"
"It's a little strange-" Draco started but Harry leaned in and pressed a kiss to the corner of Draco's mouth and every word that Draco knew disappeared.
"Don't overthink it," he said with a wink. Then he turned and started off down the sidewalk calling, "See you tomorrow," over his shoulder.
Draco was half way to bed before he realized that there was no one watching when Harry kissed him on his door step.
------------
They spent the next two weeks fake dating and it was the best dating experience Draco had ever had. Harry was sweet and doting, just like Draco had said he wanted and Draco enjoyed that thoroughly.
But what he hadn't expected enjoying as much as he did was being good to Harry in return. While Draco loved to be praised and brought little treats, Harry loved to be touched. He melted when Draco ran his fingers through his hair; when Draco held his hand, he got a huge dopey grin on his face that took hours to disappear; and even a casual touch, fingers trailing over the small of his back when Draco walked by, made his lips twitch up as he leaned into the touch.
Draco was quickly, and disconcertingly, becoming addicted to those smiles.
Smiles were in short supply that day, though. The case they'd worked had been tough. Harry was scowling at the folder splayed out in front of him, his jaw clenched as he filled in paperwork.
"Hey," Draco murmured as he slipped behind him and slowly rubbed Harry's shoulders.
Harry dropped his quill and leaned back into the touch, "Hey," he murmured, closing his eyes.
"Alright?" Draco asked.
He nodded, "I just hate the ones with kids."
"They're going to be alright, though," he said.
"Yeah," he agreed, "But it just brings up bad memories." He shook his head and covered Draco's hand with his own. "Want to get out of here?"
"What did you have in mind?" he asked as he combed his fingers through Harry's soft curls.
Harry tipped his head back to look up at Draco, "this is nice," he said softly. "Want to go back to mine and I'll make you dinner? Then I'll lay with my head on your lap and you can stroke my hair?" he asked wistfully and Draco's heart stuttered in his chest.
"That sounds an awful lot like dating."
"Yeah," Harry affirmed.
"But there's no one there-"
Harry pulled away, breaking Draco's contact with him, "You're right," he said, nodding as he stood up and started shoving files into his bag. "Forget it."
"Harry-"
"No, it's fine," he said, giving him a smile that didn't reach his eyes. "You're right. I'm just," he shrugged helplessly. "Forget it," he repeated as he grabbed his bag and headed to the door. "I'll see you tomorrow," he said.
"But-" Draco started before realizing it was useless because Harry was gone. He packed up his things and headed home, this was what he should have been worried about; pretending to be dating had been a terrible idea.
When he got home he flooed Pansy and told her everything. "And now I don't know what to do," he finished, imaging Harry at home all alone make dinner.
"You're such an idiot," Pansy groaned.
"Excuse me?"
She rolled her eyes. "You do know that we all knew you thought it was fake, don't you."
"What?"
"We all knew. Potter told us that first night when we met up for drinks," she said.
He frowned, "Why? Why would he say that? And why haven't you said anything?"
"Because he asked us not to. He said he was really into you, or whatever," she said flippantly, "And that he thought he could win you over by showing you how great dating him could be. He begged us to play along."
He stared at her, mouth open, "He feels the same?" he breathed.
"Yeah," she said. "Obviously."
"I've got to go," he said, abruptly ending the call so he could floo to Harry's flat.
He stumbled out of the floo and immediately called for the other man, "Harry!" he shouted, heading toward the kitchen. "Harry!"
The other man's head appeared outside of the kitchen doorway, "Draco?" he asked as though he couldn't believe his ears.
Draco took one look at him and then closed the gap between them in three steps before wrapping his arms around him and kissing him.
Harry dropped whatever he'd been holding and it shattered at their feet but Draco didn't care because he was kissing Harry Potter and that was all that mattered at the moment. He poured his heart and soul into the kiss and Harry met him with the same.
"Me too," he gasped when he pulled back.
"What?" Harry asked, looking a bit dazed and Draco could hardly blame him.
"I'm into you too," he said. "Or whatever you said to Pansy that first night."
"I told them I was in love with you," he confessed. "You still want to own that?"
He nodded and threw himself at Harry again, kissing him and wrapping his arms tight around his neck.
The next time they parted Harry asked hopefully, "So, do you want to stay for dinner?"
"How about I stay forever?" he asked, grinning wide at the other man.
He nodded, "Even better."
--------------------
Day 126: Arranged Marriage | Day 128: Snake
533 notes · View notes
inkmemes · 3 years
Text
young  royals  (  2021  )  sentence  starters ↪  taken  from  netflix’s  swedish  ya  drama.  non-contextual  spoilers.  trigger  warning  for  mentions  of  sexual  activity,  drugs,  alcohol,  death,  implied  internalised  homophobia,  bullying.  alter  as  you  see  fit  ♡
“at least you can stay for a cup of coffee?”
“hey, wait up. did you sleep together?” 
“he's probably making out with someone. forget it.”
“i can't take it anymore.”
“what are you doing?”
“and he had to finish your sentence. what's going on? you like him.”
“every time you see your dad, you get all depressed.”
“you're still here, so obviously you must want something.”
“are you high? what the hell are you on?”
“does this make you horny?” 
“i like [town name], but i don't want to live here forever.”
“you can leave now. go home. i'm staying here for the weekend.”
“do you want chocolate?”
“how do you feel?” 
“it's kind of hard to tell them apart, you know.” 
“you're a worthless drunk.”
“you … you need to figure out what you want. and you can take all the time you need. and i respect that. but you have to do it by yourself. i don't want to be anyone's secret.”
“you have to stop pretending that you're not afraid.”
“that's the thing, i just don't want that.”
“it's something new. something fresh.”
“can we talk privately for a minute?” 
“and if anyone gives you a hard time, you know, just let me know, and i'll take care of it.” 
“you do know you don't need to hide?” 
“are you gonna let us in?”
“promise to let me know if there's anything i can do.”
“hey, we won't go blind from your moonshine, right?”
“i'm just getting a good vibe. that's all.”
“you're so fucking pathetic.”
“you realize that this will have consequences?”
“he's such a fucking idiot.”
“i wanted us to have a few minutes alone.”
“when you're young, love feels like the most important thing in the world.” 
“i really like you.”
“felt like i had to rescue you from that situation.”
“it got so damn hot in there, i thought i'd get some fresh air.”
“you are allowed your own opinions. it's cool.”
“i've seen the way you look at each other.”
“here, this one is a little big for me, but i think it'll look great on you.”
“do you think royal dick is different than regular?”
“you're the only one here i feel i can actually talk to.” 
“i haven't heard anything yet, but i'll tell you as soon as i do.”
“you can't just lie here jerking off.”
“i don't want to go to some fucking boarding school!”
“i've missed this place so much.”
“are you going to horror movie night on friday?”
“but i like you. and that is not fake.”
“you don't need to share everything.”
“we should go to a concert again sometime.”
“you're fucking crazy!”
“where have you been? i've been trying to reach you.”
“just don't use the school's wi-fi for porn surfing. could be embarrassing.”
“but no matter what, they can't dictate what you say.”
“sorry about last night.”
“i don't want to talk to you!”
“i don't wanna sound like an idiot.”
“i was thinking, would you like to have a sleepover at my place? because that's something friends do. it's going to be really cozy.”
“i think maybe we should forget about that.”
“you can't really see that it is you.”
“i mean, it could be anyone. it's so fucking stupid.”
“i don't want to say anything.” 
“now you're doing it again. you're trying to take care of me.” 
“i can take it, it's okay.”
“that's not true. i haven't spoken to my parents.”
“we haven't done anything wrong.”
“you're beautiful! you're so beautiful.”
“i'm gay, [name].”
“seriously? what the fuck is your problem?”
“you keep letting people piss on you!”
“i just assumed you didn't want special treatment.”
“keep your friends close and your enemies closer.”
“so you thought you'd start spreading false rumours without having any proof?” 
“i just didn't want to lose you.”
“uh, there's pizza left if you want some.”
“everybody thinks you're perfect. you know that, right?”
“he's just been outed.”
“i'm going to fuck this up.”
“he bloody ruined my fucking life!”
“why are you sitting in your room sulking when you have a crush to hang out with?”
“hi. sorry, i was feeling a bit better. so i thought it was okay that i hung out with some friends.”
"everyone should be allowed to live as gay or straight or whatever they want.”
“i woke up in my own bed. that's always something.”
“could i just have one second? just one second alone, please?”
“i’m sorry. but it was, like, the only way.”
“i thought, everyone deserves a second chance.”
“i'm sorry about the mess. i wasn't expecting such distinguished company.”
“i just don't want you to be treated badly again.”
“oh, fuck.”
“you don't even… aren't you even gonna answer me?”
“i didn't know that one was supposed to sign up.”
“in real life, you don't pay to get ahead.”
“and what the fuck does your dad do?”
“let's try to have some table manners.”
“it's, like, really serious.”
“who the hell can live like this for three fucking years?”
“that's what happens when you buy the cheap ones.”
“i need your help with something. ”
“being a prince is not a punishment, but a privilege.”
“it's awesome to just chill out.”
“or maybe he lied about that too. what do i know?”
“you have to give people a chance.”
“you have to try to see it from my perspective.” 
“what the hell's this?”
“what happened to "we should forget about it"?”
“stop being so fucking stubborn and try to understand my situation.”
“sometimes it's better not to say everything.” 
“i was just bored.”
“have you ever had a boyfriend?”
“sometimes it's better to keep quiet.”
“can i get you some coffee?”
“nobody else cares about these things.”
“i lost track of time.”
“everybody does the same things and everybody knows everybody.”
“thanks for rescuing me yesterday.”
“remember when he came up to us the first week and was like, "what's up?"”
“i need you to delete all our texts.”
“i can't keep doing this anymore.”
“are you gonna let them go on with their bullshit?”
“i want to be with you.”
“here's a blanket, a pillow, and bed sheets. there you go.”
“okay, yeah. you don't seem to have grasped what i'm trying to say.”
“it's usually boring as hell.”
“he's been dealing to us for months.”
“i don't want to talk to him.”
“don't you wanna date [name] anymore?”
“i don't know why he's started texting me again. he knows i don't want anything to do with him.” 
“yeah, we had a shitload of drugs.”
“we could murder someone, and nobody would say a word.”
“she needs some fun.”
“he's just doing it to fuck with me.”
“it's such a weird question.”
“i just wanted to say hi. i don't believe we've met. ”
“but i still want us to be friends.”
“if i were to stay here… would you… like to keep me company? just you and me.”
“everything's, like, upside down now.”
“have you always lived here?”
“damn it. sorry. shit. i completely forgot.”
“i'm sure someone has a story to tell.”
“you've got to put yourself first. i mean, no matter what he thinks about it.”
“come on! you can't just sit there stuck in your room.”
“you can snuggle up in my safe arms if it gets scary.”
“i want to live a normal life.”
“let me have a look. you can hardly see it.”
“any other dick that's been sucked?”
“you just expect everything to be on your terms.”
“i want to know everything!”
“you don't have to go there. i'll take care of myself.”
“has anyone ever told you how pretty you are?” 
“i'll just stay in and go to bed early.”
“thanks for explaining the schedule.”
“i'd rather die.”
“i don't want you to be mad.”
“promise to tell me if something is wrong.”
“i can't be dressed like this if you're dressed like that.” 
“it's really complicated.”
“it feels like you don't care what people think about you, or if you have a lot of friends and stuff.” 
“nobody asked you to come. feel free to leave if you want.”
“well, nobody has ever, ever asked for this!” 
“there isn't so much to do around here.”
“you've become such a snob.”
“i know you're only trying to help me.” 
“do you like it here?”
“i don't wanna go in there. we're not even invited. fuck this.”
“don't you think it's weird [name] invited us to come?”
“if they hadn't been here, would you've, uh, made out with me?”
“so, you're an actual proper couple now?”
“you're thinking about someone else.”
“you're right. we're doing this together.”
“thanks… for nothing.”
“why are you even so obsessed with him?”
“i want you to hold me.”
“call me when you want to be picked up.”
“what the fuck do you care?” 
“i don't think we're a couple or anything. i don't know what it is.”
“you never asked me!”
“your focus should be on comforting me so that i can comfort him.” 
“it's not that hard. you have to be able to keep up appearances.”
“famous people make videos like that.”
“maybe somebody forgot to tell me, as usual.”
“just make a move on [name] and show him what you want.”
“you wanna stay a while and jam?”
“have you talked to your parents about it?”
“a diverse bunch of losers, who'll never amount to anything.”
“why can't i decide how the hell i want to live?”
“apparently, i'm the only one who doesn't know everybody.”
“i used to have straight a's on every test.”
“it will damage our reputation.”
“i'm fucking starving.”
“why is it called tax "evasion" but welfare "scam"? it's all right that rich people cheat, but when poor people do it, it's messed up. for rich people, it's not even called "welfare”, it's called "deduction."”
“what the fuck is rowing?”
“what the hell have you done, [name]?”
“good voice, man.”
“why can't i just have a relationship with him?”
“did you have fun last friday?”
“all the people are fake. they're made out of metal.”
what do you want me to say? i'm sorry!”
“is this some kind of prank?”
“i like you when you are yourself!”
“but you like him, don't you?”
“she shouldn't talk to you like that.”
“are you into him?”
“something's not right, i think we should head back to the road.”
“do you have trouble sleeping?”
“doesn't anyone care what i want?”
“just don't tell anyone that i've been here.”
“i was going to text you back, but…”
“your only mistake was that you hung out with the wrong kind of people.”
“i just wanted to help.”
“i know you'll use anything to get high or drunk.” 
“it's time to stop being so selfish.”
“i just want my fucking money.”
“you should've planned ahead. didn't you bring a sandwich?” 
“who the fuck wants to be normal anyway?”
“you fucking told me you were the one i could always come to!”
“i take it back.”
“i can see there's something going on.”
“i have to finish getting ready, so if you could please leave.”
“no one likes me when i'm myself.” 
“i hope you have a nice christmas.”
“i'm gonna do the wrong things, say the wrong things.”
“my mom is gonna kill me.”
“do you remember what you said to me last night?”
“i cannot be dragged into this.”
“i like you too.”
“you're no longer a part of my family.”
“it's well-suited for smaller people.”
“i assume that he thought that it would make him popular.”
“i didn't ask for this!”
“it's no problem. i like doing it.”
“it feels like i'm gonna throw up.”
“don't i get any breakfast?”
“whatever i do, i can't do anything right.”
“we haven't been to any party whatsoever.”
“did you get my texts?”
“i think it sounds romantic.”
“uh, wait, you have to come to the horror movie night on friday.”
“i liked what you said in there, [name].”
“okay, maybe he used to be a player, but love can actually change you.”
“it's nice to make an effort and dress up for dinner.” 
“i'm in a fucked-up situation and i'm trying to talk to you.” 
“you don't understand. i was gonna pay it.”
“you're not that kind of guy.”
“i was about to go outside and, um, do you wanna come with?”
“what about me?” 
“it was… okay, i guess.”
“can i sit with you?”
“you call this a scary movie?”
“i have a million things to take care of, i don't have time to talk to you.”
“have you lost it completely?”
“but i'm starving.”
“this past year has been difficult for me.”
“i don't get it. she's making it into such a big deal.”
“no, this won't work. just take it off, please.” 
“i'm not like that.”
“fuck you. it's not a crush.”
“then i know that i can't count on you.”
“can't you come see me in [town] sometime?”
“it's just that we can't be seen together.” 
“he was still sleeping when i walked in.”
“doesn't bother me at all. i've seen it. absolutely. 100%.”
“[name] is really getting on my nerves! seriously.”
“i want us to be friends again.”
“i thought you and [name] were friends.”
“make sure you check your dms. okay?”
“you think it's fun to fuck with people like me?”
“never spend money you don't have. okay?”
“you think i'm stupid?”
“this sucks.” 
“how nice to see some smiles.”
“this isn't just about me, but my entire family.”
“i'm going to marry her.”
“are you threatening me?”
“don't you realize the shit storm that follows if i come out?” 
“i don't want you to talking to her.”
“remember what we saw during movie night? when they sat next to each other?”
“i love you.”
“i just want to hang out with you.”
"there's no point in having a back-up if you never use it."
“pretend i'm saying something clever.”
“how's [name]? he must be totally devastated.”
“what do you think they think we're talking about?”
“everything is fake. everything in the world is fake.”
“[name] is dead.”
“it just wasn't what i thought it would be like.”
“since when did you start liking him for real?” 
“what a fucking douchebag. god!”
“what the hell are you saying? chill out!”
422 notes · View notes
cal-puddies · 2 years
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You'll See me in Hindsight // Calum Hood
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hello friends. I hope you are here to enjoy the first part of Even if it's Just Pretend, a three part series featuring the Calum Hood. I've been working on this for months. like probably since late July early august. and It's a lot of angst and smut (because what else would you expect!) @kindahoping4forever who is forever my partner in things did these graphics and helped me clean up the grammar. 🦦🦦💕💕
Warnings: This part is mostly just angst and a lil bit of smut.
Word count: 5382
Cass & Crystal’s Masterlist
Let us  know  what  you  think!
March 26th.
If you could do the whole day over again, you probably would.
Logically, you knew that even if you could go back and make different choices, it wouldn’t change the outcome.
You take a sip of the drink you’re holding. You know he’s gonna be here, he has to be. Ashton finally found someone to spend his life with. You were around for so much of their relationship, you ended up becoming quite close with both Ash and Lyric.
In fact, when you’d tried to opt out of the wedding shower, you were told it was required since you were, of course, the maid of honor. When you made eye contact to ask if Cal would be the best man, you just got a slight nod, indicating that yes, he would be.
You take a sip and you hear his giggle above everything else and it’s like suddenly the air is knocked out of your lungs. He still knocks the breath out of you, like when he walks in the room, all the air leaves. It’s far from an ego thing, people just can’t help but love him.
Everyone’s Baby, that’s what you used to say to him. No one ever stayed mad at him and everyone loved having him around. He just drew that kind of attention. It’s what makes it hard for you to stay mad at him. Even as he missed another date, even as you broke up… you couldn’t stay mad.
He did his best but it just wasn’t enough to meet your needs.
You sit on the couch with your laptop and a glass of wine. Cal’s hoodie engulfs your body as you lounge. You'd practically begged him to be early or at the very least on time so that you could watch a movie and spend some time together but he’s already an hour and a half later than he said he’d be.
You hear his key in the door and he breezes through, kissing you on the forehead, “Hey gorgeous… I know… but you know how Ash gets about getting things perfect while the vibe is good.” He plops next to you.
“Yeah… I get it,” you nod, leaving it at that for now. “Um, I was just looking at the calendar, do you think you can update with any stuff you guys have? I have days off I need to burn and I’d like to spend them with you.”
“Yeah, yeah. I’ll sync it right now, while I go change.” He leans over to press a kiss to your lips.
“Cal, it’s already pretty late and I have shit I have to do in the morning. I’m not gonna make it through a movie,” you admit.
“I know… I’m so sorry, babe. With Lyric outta town, Ash didn’t want to go home and be alone, so he basically kept us all hostage.”
You take a deep breath. “We just don’t get time together anymore. I don’t remember it being this hard. This… whatever this conversation is... is the longest we’ve been awake in the house together since I can remember.”
“Love.” Cal waits until you meet his eyes. “We’ll make time. I promise.”
“Yeah… when we can pencil in time to pencil each other in.” You sigh. “I miss when we were in pen, Cal.” You look at him for what feels like both a lifetime and only seconds all at once. “I’m just… I’m gonna go to bed. I’m tired.”
Cal surprises you by crawling into bed next to you instead of staying up. He rests his arm over your waist but judging by his breathing and the amount of movement, he’s having as much trouble sleeping as you are.
You’re a zombie when you finally get out of bed, little bits of fitful sleep are all you’d managed. You text your boss that you’ll be late. You make a pot of coffee, grab your laptop and sit at the dining table.
Cal comes out about 40 minutes later. He kisses the top of your head and grabs a cup of coffee. He makes toast for both of you and you silently eat together. You have the urge to cry but you hold it in.
“You’re home late,” he mentions.
“Um, I didn’t think I should leave without us at least seeing each other… instead of me just seeing you sleep,” you shrug, shutting the laptop and turning toward him.
He lets out a humorless laugh, “I wasn’t really doing that last night.”
“I know… me either.”
“I know.”
You stay silent for another few minutes before Cal grabs your hands. You watch him admire them, like he's trying to memorize them. He turns them over, rubs over them, feels each of your fingers and cups them in his, bringing them to his lips to kiss.
“This isn’t working, is it?” You ask, voice cracking as you chew your lip, trying to stop the tears.
Cal looks at you and you can tell he’s fighting back his own tears. “I don’t think so,” he admits, taking a couple deep breaths. “But I love you so, so much,” he emphasizes, letting his tears fall.
You sigh, “I know. I love you.”
“I don’t know when… when we stopped putting us in pen… but I know I thought that loving each other would take us through it, till we got back to that point… but I don’t know if it’s coming… and it’s not fair to keep you always waiting on me.” Cal hangs his head, his tears hit your hands where he holds them in his lap.
“I don’t want this,” you whisper, not trusting your voice.
Cal tugs your hands and pulls you into his lap, holding you tight to his body. “I don’t either… but…”
“Don’t say it, Cal, I know.” You cling to him.
You can still feel the soft kisses, the way the two of you made love for the last time, his hands memorizing your body, his mouth doing the same to yours. His last “I love you” as he walked you to your car, and the last look as he tucked your hair behind your ear and kissed you for the last time, saying he’d stay with Ash until you found a place.
Cal makes his way around the room, greeting everyone as if this party was for him. It makes you smile to see him so extroverted among his friends.
“And you,” he says, stopping in front of you. “It’s really good to see you.” A soft smile crosses his face but you see conflict in his eyes, not knowing if he should hug you or not.
“It’s good to see you.” You reach over and touch his arm. “You look good.”
He rolls his eyes. “Ash made me dress up.” He reaches for your hand and does the thing he used to, where he’d feel all over it, rub his thumb over both sides, and gently pull each of your fingers between his. It calmed anxiety for the both of you.
“I get that… Lyric picked my dress,” you chuckle, fanning out the skirt a little.
“You look incredible.” He stops for a moment to take you in. “Can you believe these two are gonna do this?!” He asks, finally dropping your hand, realizing it might be a little weird. “I mean we were there for the proposal but I guess I never realized it’d finally get here.” He turns so you're both looking out among the rest of the party.
“I guess I just kinda figured they’d be perpetually engaged until Crystal annoyed them enough to start planning a wedding and then Ash would get frustrated and just take Lyric to the courthouse.”
“Yeah…” He nods. “I kinda always thought we’d elope,” he mentions with a shrug, looking over at you.
You clench your jaw and let out a tense laugh, “That definitely seems like something we would have done...” There’s a beat before you hold up your empty glass. “Uhh… I’m gonna go get another drink.” You need to get away and fast, because that hurt, like a punch to the stomach.
You get your drink and start to make your own rounds, acutely aware of where Calum is at all times. Those four months apart haven't healed anything for you yet and if it had, that comment he just made would’ve torn off any scab that had formed.
Lyric can tell immediately that something is off when you approach her and it’s written on her face. Ash intercepts you in a bear hug. “There’s the maid of honor!” He teases, “Saw you and the best man getting a little cozy.”
“Yeah… then my ex said he always thought we’d elope.”
A pained expression crosses both Ash and Lyric’s faces at the same time. “He really said that, huh?”  Lyric squeezes your arm sympathetically.
“And I ran away.”
“I’m sorry babe,” Ash says, squeezing your other arm.
“It’s not like we could avoid each other forever, especially with you two lovebirds getting married,” you sing-song. Ash gets another pained expression and you shake your head. “Don’t say it, Ash. I know everyone thought Cal and I would too. But this is about you guys!” You squeeze Lyric’s hand.
A couple hours pass and then the party is winding down. Ash and Lyric had asked the wedding party to stop by their place afterwards for drinks and to discuss some plans, so you gather your things, preparing to head over there.
Cal comes up to you. “Hey, can I catch a ride? I came with the happy couple and I want them to have this moment a bit longer.”
“Of course.” You smile.
As the two of you head for the door, Cal rests his hand on your lower back. You don’t say anything because it’s always been comfortable, even before the two of you were dating, back when Lyric had just introduced you.
“Hey…  I probably owe you an apology. I said too much earlier… I just…”
You interrupt him. “It’s OK, handsome. We haven’t really seen each other since everything and I guess we haven’t really adjusted how we speak to each other.”
Cal sighs quietly, “I don’t want to have to adjust how I talk to you.” You bite your lip and pretend you didn’t hear him because the only response you have toward it wouldn’t be fair of you to say to him right now. He asks, “You want me to drive? I know you hate the hills at night.”
“Sure.” You hand him the keys and he opens the passenger side door for you.
When you stop at a red light, you watch him as his hand starts to reach over to rest on your thigh and then he stops himself, flexing his fingers before putting them back on the steering wheel. “Habit,” he explains.
“Yeah I know… I’ve watched from the backseat while you put your hand on Ash’s thigh,” you laugh.
“He does have really nice, strong thighs.” He plays along, saying it flirtatiously and slowly, emphasizing nice and strong.
You both laugh. “So do you, Cal… I know that all too well.” You wink when he glances at you and some of the tension dissipates.
“They want destination stag parties, have they told you? Same destination. Ash wants to be able to go to bed with her.” He shrugs. “I was thinking Vegas.”
“Yeah, we had lunch last week. I don’t think Vegas will be that fun for Ash… maybe somewhere we can go and spend some time out on the water or something. Plenty to do together and separate, you know?”
“Oh yeah… you always think things through more. We should get a meal and talk about it. Or you can come by, we can make dinner…”
“What, like a date?” You tease.
“Yeah, OK… that’s fair,” he nods, chuckling. “We’ll do lunch then.”
“Cal, it’s fine, I know how you are with public outings, I’ll come to the house. I miss Little Man anyway.”
“Duke’ll be so excited to see you.” Cal puts your car in park and then smiles over at you. “Just let me know what works.”
———————
Cal feels nervous. His hands shake slightly as he tries to clean up the house a bit and at the last minute, he decides he needs to change. You show up in the middle of that, letting yourself in.
Cal walks out, buttoning up his shirt, “Hey, you’re here!”
“Yeah, sorry, I let myself in.”
“It’s fine, I should’ve guessed you would.” He smiles.
“I still like that shirt,” you smile back.
“Thank you.” He leans in to kiss your cheek. “You look… amazing.”
You glance around. “Tried to do a quick clean up?” You tease.
“You can tell?”
“I know your tells.” You laugh, pointing toward a small pile of stuff on a shelf that doesn’t belong. Cal feels even more nervous as he sheepishly shrugs. “It’s why we usually hired someone to come in, we both do shit like that.” You chuckle and Cal relaxes, letting out a small giggle.
Cal orders dinner, pours you a glass of wine and the two of you sit on the couch and start discussing the upcoming trip, laughing about the shenanigans that you’ve experienced on past group vacations.
He grabs his MacBook so you guys can start looking things over and pricing them out. He can’t help but stare at you while you make decisions between hotels and AirBnBs, lake versus ocean, the kind of nightlife you want available in balance with daytime activities.
He loves you like this, totally in your element and getting excited about something. He watches your eyes light up when something catches your attention. Without much thought he rests his hand on your thigh and his heart skips a beat for a moment while you kind of stare at it. You rest your hand on top of his and wrap your fingers around his, giving it a little squeeze.
He moves in a little closer and rests his chin on your shoulder so he can see what you're so fascinated with. He feels you hold your breath and considers what that might mean. He hopes you miss him because he definitely misses you. He’s thought about you everyday for months.
He relaxes when you finally breathe. You squeeze his hand again and Cal pulls his chin off your shoulder so you can turn your head to look at him. He sees the questions in your eyes but he seizes the opportunity and gently pushes the hair off your face. He tucks his fingers under your chin to pull you in for a kiss. You’re hesitant at first and slowly kiss back but he waits you out until you melt into him. But when his hand slips into your hair, you pull back.
He knows immediately that you’re upset. Your nostrils flare and you huff out a breath.
“What? Did I read that wrong?”
“No… but we can’t do this. We’ve made promises to our friends, the bride and groom, that we’d be chill and not complicate this.”
Cal nods. “It’s complicated whether they want it to be or not, babe. Because at the end of the day we’re not done… or at least, I don’t think we are. And it’s my goal to get back to you and be good enough for you.”
“Calum.” You sigh. “You are good enough for me… we just… need to work on ourselves a bit.” You shrug. “Figure out how we work together now… in the beginning we did all our growing together and then things really started taking off for you guys so we started growing more separate than together. And now… well,  we have to figure ourselves out before we try to jam the pieces back together.”
“But you want to get back together?” He clarifies.
“Yes…. No? …Maybe? You’re all I’ve known for four years... What am I supposed to do, stop wanting you all together? Stop loving you? I don’t think that’s possible.”
“It’s my goal to get back to you.” He reiterates, grabbing your hand, gently rubbing his thumb across the skin.
Your eyes soften as they meet his and you cup his cheek. “I want nothing more but I don’t want to rush it… and I don’t want it to get in the way of what we’re doing for Lyric and Ash.”
Cal chews his lip. He wants to argue and have this out now. He wants his life to go back to normal and to have you back home with him. He misses your laugh, your smell, and your little whines. He misses the way you take up space in his bed and the way you touch him. Your presence was beyond reassuring for him. You know his soul.
But you’re headstrong, stubborn, and loyal to a fault. There’s no way you’re gonna let this go that easily. So he decides to wait.
———————
Cal wraps his arm around your waist as you all head toward the next bar. Ashton and Lyric are already heading back to the hotel, anticipating the following island day being hot and exhausting. With the guests of honor gone, you and Cal both feel the shared responsibility to take care of everyone.
“Can I buy you a drink?” Cal asks.
“Please, no,” you laugh. “I want to enjoy tomorrow and if I get drunk tonight I’m going to be miserable.”
“Water it is.”
“Hey, you don’t have to join me.”
“And leave you to wrangle slutty, drunk Luke? I don’t think so.”
Luke does get drunk and everyone gets easily annoyed. Once that happens, the night quickly ends. Cal gets in a car with half the people and sends you off with the other half in a separate car. You see people onto the elevator and get them going to their respective floors and you wait for Cal in the lobby. You're not sure why… but with as much time as you’ve spent with him lately, it just felt right.
“Hey,” he greets, ushering people, including you, onto the elevator. He asks you quietly, “You wanna stay up with me?”
“Yeah, I’d like that.”
Once everyone is safely in their rooms, Cal walks you to his, just three doors down from yours. He lets you in, turns on a lamp and leads you out to the balcony. “Tonight was… wild,” he laughs.
“Uh… yeah… can you imagine us all being on a boat, stuck on an island tomorrow?”
He smiles over at you. “Oh no… this was a bad idea…”
“Well… it’s what the bride and groom wanted,” you shrug, biting your lip.
Cal reaches over and pushes the hair off your face, putting the two of you in yet another trance. He gently cups your chin and then his lips are on yours. He pulls you in, tight against his chest, and deepens the kiss. You let him.
He still makes all the right moves, just like his timing and curious hands were made only for your body. It’s easy for you to melt into him - it’s familiar yet it’s been long enough that it almost feels new.
You push against his chest and he immediately pulls back. He rushes out, “Shit, I’m so sorry… it’s just…”
“Fine… it’s fine… just let me get my bearings for a second.” You hum, smiling at him, grabbing onto his arms so he won’t pull away. You take a deep breath as you look at Calum and then you’re on your toes, kissing him again. His hands slide down to your ass; he squeezes and picks you up, your legs wrap around his waist and he moves you both to the bed. You remember how being with him like this was one of the greatest feelings in the world. And it’s feeling like that still proves to be true.
He looks focused as he gently yanks the shorts you’re wearing off your hips. His eyebrows knit together as his eyes find yours. You reach and cup his chin, nodding to let him know it’s OK. “I’ve missed the way you taste,” he murmurs.
“I’ve missed this.”
His eyes are back on yours. “Me too, Darlin’,” he hums. “C’mere.” He pulls you up for another kiss and this time the two of you peel the rest of the clothing off each other. When Cal’s shirt comes off, you take a moment to admire him and the tattoos, appreciating the new ones and how his body has been responding to working out. He chuckles, “Get a good look, little one?”
“Sorry,” you say, blushing. “Been a minute since I’ve seen anyone naked, let alone you and this bod I've always loved.”
“Ash is looking great naked… ya know, Luke’s been looking good too,” he jokes and you know it’s to make you feel better and also to answer a question you were afraid to ask. “But you? Gorgeous as always.” You blush harder and Cal leans in to kiss your cheek. “I always felt so lucky to be the man that got to see you like this… and what’s coming next.”
He scoops his arm around your back and repositions you on the bed, making room for him to lay on his stomach between your legs. He takes his time kissing on your thighs, his thumbs slowly pulling your lips apart, and you shudder when his hot breath hits your sensitive skin. You sigh, “Please, handsome.”
“Relax for me… it’s me, babe. We’ve been here,” he reminds you.
And it does seem to help: your legs relax over his shoulders and your fingers thread into his hair. “Yeah,” you nod.
“I know it’s been awhile, love. For me too. We can take this slow,” he promises.
His tongue almost feels foreign as it slicks through your folds. You used to know what to anticipate but it seems it’s either been too long or you're too keyed up because when his lips wrap around your clit to suck, you see stars and your body tenses in an almost painful way. Cal pulls off, letting his tongue caress over your clit while his hands try to comfort you and coax you into relaxing.
He changes his technique after seeing that it’s clearly too much for you. He switches over to the technique where he basically just makes out with your pussy. It’s still unmistakably intimate but not quite as intense. Your body relaxes into his embrace, thankful to be with someone who knows you so well. Not that you’ve even thought about being with anyone since Cal.
You look down at him and see he’s looking up at you. Your breathing picks up at the sight - you get lost in his warm, brown eyes. Your fingers tighten in his hair and he tightens his grip on you, keeping you close and anchored to him.
“Oh… Caaaal,” you moan, back arching off the bed.
“That’s my girl,” he coos.
You know he loves when you’re vocal and you can’t help but chant his name. Stringing it out like a melody, decorated with the occasional “fuck” and “please, baby”. Calum’s tongue presses into your entrance and you tense up, orgasm sneaking up on you. He licks you through it and then kisses up your belly to your mouth, and the resulting kiss you share is so slow yet needy. You pull him against you, needing to feel the weight of him and his familiar warmth.
“You want more?” He asks, pushing himself up to get a look at you. And you know just from looking at him that he’s prepared to give you anything you want.
You nod, biting your lip, “Want you.”
He nods, “Want you too.” He thinks for a minute. “I don’t have any condoms… I wasn’t expecting to…”
“I still have my IUD… it’s OK.” You rub your hands over his chest.
“Baby…” he starts.
“I mean it, Calum, it’s OK, we still can,” you reassure him.
He seems to think on it a little longer. “OK… but…” He rolls the two of you onto your sides, facing each other, pulling your leg so your thigh is over his hip. “Like this.”
He’s so hard. You can feel his stiff cock between your bodies but he doesn’t seem to be in any sort of rush. He’s letting his fingers trail over your skin all while he captures your lips in a slow, passionate kiss. His lips move down to your neck as he gently palms your breasts, tweaking your nipples. You trail your hand down his stomach, wondering if he’s waiting for you to take the lead.
“It’s been 8 months, love, and a long ass tour, let me take my time,” he insists, and you can’t help but let him. He gropes your ass and pulls you impossibly close before checking in. “You ready?”
You nod, bracing yourself. He pushes his head in, stopping to gauge your reaction. You bite your lip but keep eye contact and he gives you a few shallow thrusts, causing you to moan.
He slides all the way in and then stops, letting each of you adjust. He tilts your chin up for a kiss. “Still feels like you’re made for me,” he groans.
“Yeah… yeah… feels good,” you moan, nodding at him.
Calum kisses you softly, which is fine because you want to remember every second of this; the way he feels and all his sounds, the way his chest moves as he starts to breathe heavier, thrusting into you like he’s trying to savor the way it feels as well.
He cums first, squeezing your ass tight as he holds you on him, moaning out for you.
You barely have time to fully comprehend him pulling out before he’s pushing two fingers in to finish you off. Always a gentleman in bed. It didn’t matter though, all you really wanted was to be close to him again.
Your second orgasm causes your body to shake and it seems Cal anticipates that, squeezing you tight to his body before pulling his fingers out. He rocks you, whispering, “I’ve got you,” like a mantra, like if he says it enough, he’ll convince you both it’s true for more than this moment.
After a quick bathroom break to clean up, the two of you are back in bed. Cal’s on his back and you’re laying with your arms crossed over his stomach and chest, head resting on top looking at him. The sheet covers your naked lower halves. Cal’s fingers draw patterns into your skin as he tells you funny stories from tour.
You both quiet down from a fit of giggles and his tone turns serious. “Can I ask you something? Probably gonna be tough to discuss,” he admits. You nod, noting it’s 4AM and you both need to be down at breakfast in four hours. He checks the clock too and shrugs, “Maybe we should sleep.” You gently pinch him so he knows to ask his question. He goes for it. “Do you think, if I’d have come home on time that night, we’d still be together?”
You don’t know why you were expecting anything but that question. You sigh, “Honestly? No. I think if you’d come home on time it just would have prolonged it a little bit? Like if it wasn’t then then it would have probably been in the next couple weeks. I don’t think we’d have made it through tour.” He takes a deep breath and you watch him. That wasn’t the answer he expected. “I think we needed it, honestly. Like, I’m to blame too. And I wanted it to be all your fault. I never would have admitted that.”
“What do you mean?” He asks, flattening his hand on your back to rub it.
“I knew where you were. If I really wanted to spend time with you, I could have texted you and come to the studio, like the other girls do. I could have made time to be with you too, instead of expecting you to do it all. I think part of me just wanted to see you put me first, which was dumb. I knew from the day we met that music would always be your number one and I operated fine knowing that. But the times I forgot that or wanted something different, that’s when I stopped being a good partner to you. Do I think that you could have come home on time? Absolutely. But it just furthers my point that we’re both to blame. We both stopped prioritizing each other where we used to. I needed to be away from you to know that,” you say quietly.
“You’ve thought about this. A lot.”
“I’ve had plenty of time to, in case we ever had this exact conversation. Never really saw it happening like this, though,” you chuckle.
“Are you gonna regret this?” He chews his lip, which tells you he’s now feeling insecure about having done this with you.
You give him a soft smile and lean up to kiss him, cupping his face.“No. It’s always worth it to be the center of your world for a minute.” You make it sound definite so he doesn’t keep worrying about it.
“Last thing and we can move on, I swear... d’you think you’re ready to get back together?”
You don’t hesitate to answer. “It’s a conversation I’m more than open to having. You?”
“Of course… I’ve been thinking about nobody but you for 8 months. How we both cried and I held you and how if something hurt so bad, how could it be right? Wondering if the pain was the right thing.” He gently pets your hair. “How hurt you looked both that night and in the morning. But then I always think... ‘Is it just because I was comfortable? Do I really want you or will a series of warm bodies do?’ And I always, always came back to you. No one’s ever gonna compare to you. You hit this very high standard thanks to my mom and Mali. A world tour away, not having you to call when I needed someone…”
“You could have called anyone,” you point out lightly.
“Oh I did, called half the people in my contacts at some point during tour but you’re the only one I actually wanted or needed to hear from. And I didn’t. And I couldn't ask that of you because I knew how’d it’d live with you.” He sighs. “So suffice it to say, yes, I have thought about getting back together and getting you back is very high on my list of things to do. But I think it’s gonna take more than a night together. We obviously need to talk through some things…”
You put your hand over his mouth so he’ll stop talking and you shift so you’re on your knees, face to face with him, pressing a chaste kiss to his lips. “Bubba,” you softly say, running your hand through his curls. “Let’s make it through this wedding. None of the spotlight should be taken from Lyric and Ash. Then we can talk about it.”
Cal pulls you into another kiss. “Does that mean this can’t happen anymore?”
“I think we should feel it out, like we did tonight. I don’t want to put any more pressure on either of us.” You lay back down next to him, your head sharing his pillow.
He turns his head and cups your face for a kiss. “You’re welcome in my bed whenever you want. Here or back home.” He watches your eyes, making sure you understand the depth of his invitation. You give him a little nod and a barely whispered ‘OK’ before sharing another gentle kiss, allowing you to relish in the very distinct feeling of his lips on yours.
The topic is changed and you and Cal cuddle in further together, giggling and talking until the sun comes up, when you both declare you need the 45 minutes of sleep before you have to get ready for the day. You curl into him and he wraps around you protectively.
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ptergwen · 3 years
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love is more than a word
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w/c: a very ouch 3.6k
warnings: so so so much angst and an unhealthy (ish) relationship
summary: after nearly four years together, peter has stopped trying
a/n: listen y’all i don’t know what came over me when i made this but i think it’s the saddest thing i’ve ever written? uh try to enjoy tho
-
you never thought this would happen, but you’re getting tired of peter. it isn’t your fault. that cliche it’s not you, it’s me line doesn’t apply here.
at first, you actually did find yourself believing the it’s me part. you’d came to the conclusion that you expect too much from peter. he goes to class, he works, patrols, sometimes parties, takes you out when he can. he’s got a lot going on for a full time college student, which is a busy life to lead on its own.
it’s why you don’t complain when he wants to spend the night in and order a pizza instead of cooking together like you’ve been wanting to try. it’s why every time your friends ask you two to hang, you have to reluctantly explain that peter is passed out at eight o’clock on a saturday.
there’s a lazy “wanna make out?” some nights, if peter isn’t yawning when he steps through the front door. even that has lost its enjoyment. kissing peter doesn’t give you the rush it used to, the taste of his strawberry chapstick not flooding your senses and intoxicating you. it’s become predictable. comfortable. boring.
peter is boring.
you’ve slipped into unspoken routine. say your hello’s, work on separate assignments in different rooms. peter eventually yells something like “babe, you hungry yet?” across the apartment, his passive way of asking you to make dinner. you usually order takeout because why make an effort if he doesn’t?
you might watch one of the ten movies peter has liked since before the start of your relationship. he’ll usually fall asleep during it. no surprise there. his overpacked schedule exhausts him, which you’ve talked to him about spreading himself too thin. peter is too nice and can’t say no, so this is where it leaves him.
the main reason you’ve stayed with him is that he can’t take care of himself. he’s clueless about paying the bills, sorting his laundry, simply remembering to drink water. peter wouldn’t be able to go a week without you. he even says it himself.
“crap, i totally forgot about these,” when you picked up his special ordered textbooks from your school library. “can food go in the garbage disposal?” a rare time you didn’t wash the dishes. “thank you, y/n/n. you’re literally a lifesaver,” whenever you do a task for him that someone in their 20s shouldn’t need assistance with.
you didn’t used to mind much. he watches over the city every night. you felt you should return the favor. spider-man could use some help, too. after the almost four years you’ve been together, peter has become completely dependent on you. it only got worse when you moved in together your junior year. you’re concerned how he’ll manage later in his adult life.
you’d think he’d be a little more passionate about your relationship considering how much he needs you. you know peter still loves you, of course he does. that’s not what the problem is. he’s become content with the mutual feeling, so he doesn’t try anymore. he expects the spark to keep itself lit.
no more random joke of the day texts that he used to send you. he stopped surprising you with your coffee order in the morning, the one that he memorized the first time you two went to a starbucks. what you initially found most endearing about peter was that he remembered every little thing you told him.
he put whatever energy he had into showing you that he listened. he’d do it all with rosy cheeks and that toothy smile of his. it seems now like he’s under the impression that being in a long term relationship means none of that matters anymore. there’s no need to impress you, keep you guessing, make you feel special.
tonight is your breaking point. as you go over all of this in your head while peter lays peacefully next to you, you can’t take it. you’ve been making so many excuses for him. you lie to yourself. you’re desperate to believe this is okay and normal and you can work this out, and you can love whatever version of him this is.
but, you can’t. you can’t do it. you need to tell him now because if you sleep on this, you’ll end up feeling bad and be stuck under these suffocating blankets forever.
“peter?” you whisper his name, your back turned to him in bed. you haven’t cuddled each other to sleep in a while. his arms don’t make you feel held now, they make you feel trapped. you’ve been forcing yourself to ignore his look of hurt when you reject his open embrace.
“peter?” you speak louder after a moment of silence, except for his occasional snores. a loud one escapes him before they stop altogether. his eyes stay shut as he mumbles out a, “uh... huh?” your heart is thudding through your entire body. you take a breath in from your nose. “i wanna break up.”
the breath you let out next is one of relief, those three words that have been scratching your throat for months finally out. peter slowly turns his head over his shoulder. he blinks rapidly at your motionless figure. you’re still not facing him.
“what?” is all he says. his voice is surprisingly steady, the confession not yet registering with his sleepy mind. his eyes are burning into you. “i wanna break up,” you repeat and squish your face further into your pillow. peter suddenly sits up, flicking on the lamp on his side. he tries to sling an arm around you. you move further away until you’re at the edge of the bed.
“i’m serious, peter. everything we had, it’s gone.” your words cut through him harder than literal knives he’s been stabbed with. “i- i don’t understand. where is this coming from?” he rakes a hand through his mess of curls. you turn onto your back, looking up at peter. his eyes are fixed on your lower half.
he’ll most definitely cry if he meets your eyes. he really doesn’t want to cry, not ever again when you won’t be here to make him feel better.
“it’s been coming,” you almost scoff at him as you prop yourself up against your pillows. peter’s teeth tug at his lower lip. “all we do is this.” you gesture to your bed, slapping your hand down at your side. “i get tired,” he speaks quietly, refusing to look at you. “i know you do, peter. i know, but you’d be a lot happier if you ever listened to me.”
your statement comes off as condescending to him. he works up the courage to look you in the face. “are you kidding? all you do is boss me around, and i take it. i’ve never once complained.” anger is coursing through his veins and voice. at the situation, that he’s about to lose the one stable part of his life. you’re getting pissed, too.
“that’s because you can’t do anything yourself!” you throw the blankets off you and swing your legs over the bed in one motion. peter hops out of bed entirely. “my whole life, i’ve been on my own half the time,” he spits as he comes over to stand in front of you. “sorry for taking you up on your offers to help.”
your peter would never spew that shit out. he wouldn’t guilt you for something he’s in the wrong about. this peter takes you for granted. he has no clue how fucked he’d be without you.
the first time you spoke to peter was on your way to history 227. you’d recognized him from your class, much more interested in the pretty boy taking notes with his tongue stuck out than whatever war your professor would lecture about.
he was carrying some books, a pencil case that didn’t fully zip, and a five subject notebook. you watched him do his balancing act through the halls until his legs started to wobble. a knowing smile on your face, you tapped his shoulder. it was a gentle one so you didn’t scare him and make all his things fall over.
“can i carry something for you?” you laughed out and pushed one of your backpack straps up on your shoulder. peter only stared at you, his doe eyes prompting you to reach for his pencil case. “uh, no, it’s fine. i got it. see?” he proved that to you by hiking everything up in his arms. he gave you a smile of his own.
“are you sure? we’re going to the same place,” you’d checked again and pointed at his impressive pile. “i’m not gonna steal your sharpies.” “really, i’m fine,” peter insisted with a heart clenching chuckle. “you can have one, if you want,” he offered and attempted to unzip his case, one handed. you put your hand over his to stop him.
“wait until we get to class,” you let go of him, leaving the tips of peter’s ears a shade of pink you’d later fall in love with. “i’ll sit with you.”
peter was once determined to do things on his own, to be self-sufficient. it used to be something he was proud of. now, he’s completely incapable of holding his independence.
“we’re done, peter.” your tone is short, you getting to your feet. “you’d probably forget how to fucking breathe without me, but call it bossing around, i guess,” you laugh bitterly and go over to your drawers. peter’s face falls as he grabs your wrist, stopping you when you pass by him. “where are you going?”
no answer. you pull yourself out of his grasp with your lips pressed into a stern line. peter follows you step by step over to the dresser. “wait, wait. don’t leave, baby. please,” he begs you, getting onto his knees beside you. you’re pulling random clothes out as quick as you can. a science t-shirt peter outgrew is in your hands.
peter used to give you all his old clothes. the signature smell of his cologne lingered no matter how many times you washed them. they kept you calm on nights he was out late patrolling or away on missions. peter would sport a smirk whenever you wore them out in public, pulling you closer to him and complimenting the look.
it started when he was packing for his first mission since you two had begun living together. he’d realized he became too buff to fit in some shirts. remembering how many times you’d giggle at their funny sayings, peter gave them to you. you threw one on and thanked him with a peck on the cheek. it became your tradition.
peter would set off for a new continent, but a piece of him would stay home with you.
the stretched out hoodies and ripped sweatpants just sit in your drawer now. another meaningful thing discontinued. whatever he doesn’t want goes to may for donations now. the memory of what they used to mean to you makes a fit of rage burst through you.
you slam down his ‘find x’ shirt in the space between his knees and yours. you’re on a mission of your own this time. you aren’t going anywhere until you get rid of all the stuff that went from him to you.
“y/n, don’t do this. i- i love you. i love you.” peter chokes out, tears filling his eyes. his vision is clouded while you toss more clothes to your side. “i love you, y/n/n,” he whimpers again, and this time you briskly push the drawer shut. the whole dresser shakes. this is the most emotion either of you have shown in the past few months of your relationship. it’s a little too late.
“love is more than a word, peter. you have to back it up with actions.” you’re doing your best not to cry. the memories of how loved peter made you feel play in your mind. he briefly wipes under his eyes and shakes his head. he’s so oblivious. “i thought i- i did.” “exactly, you did. you gave up at some point.” your voice gets weaker as a tear drips down your chin.
you didn’t plan on breaking down when you imagined this moment. part of you wishes you could give him another chance. most of you knows it wouldn’t do any good for you or peter. you’re not right for each other anymore. he outgrew some sweatshirts, you outgrew him.
that takes you all the way back to it’s not you, it’s me. it’s really both of you.
for the last time, you pull peter in for a hug. the two of you need this. he loops his arms around your back, keeping them loose around you as he tucks his face into the side of your neck. you’re a mix of tears and sharp breaths with your chin on his shoulder. you bring a hand up to the back of his head, grabbing a fistful of curls.
he sobs right into your ear, effectively destroying whatever composure you had left.
even though you’re not in love with peter, you haven’t stopped loving him. somewhere inside of him is the goofy boy who asked you out on a post-it during class. the kindhearted man who gave so much of himself to the world and saved enough for you. the one whose fingertips left goosebumps on your skin with every touch.
seeing him like this, having caused it feels like a dull pain rippling in every part of your body. you’ve been there to soothe him during countless breakdowns over the years. you managed to stay strong for all of them. this is the only exception. he lost people, felt down about life, made mistakes. you were there to pick up each piece and put them back together.
the one mistake peter made that you can’t fix is not loving you right. you became his rock, his anchor whenever he let grief and sadness rule over him. you’d get him back to himself. he could’ve at least bought you flowers once in a while, or done anything that showed his gratitude. every iteration of awful put together isn’t enough to describe how he feels.
“i’m so- i’m so fucking sorry, baby. i don’t deserve you. i never have,” peter murmurs as he cries, wetting your skin that his face is still pressed into. your fingers pull roughly at his hair. hot tears overflow from your own eyes. “i should’ve done more.” his voice cracks on the last word. “that’s all i wanted to hear, pete,” you breathe out and pull away from him.
“does that mean you’ll stay?” he croaks, arms still wound around your body. his eyes are hopeful when they lock with yours. a frown pulls at your lips. “only for tonight. i should... one of us should sleep on the couch.” “oh,” his voice is gravelly, so he clears his throat. “i’ll do it.” you’re not going to fight him on it for once.
peter removes his arms from your waist, you sitting back down on your thighs. you give him a blink and you’ll miss it smile because you can’t keep one for long. it’s to let him know you’re not mad. you were at the start of this conversation, then he took accountability. you also came to terms with the fact that the downfall of your relationship was a joined effort.
there are more factors than peter not giving you what he should have. time, different goals, new outlooks on life. you can’t hate only him because a whole bunch of things lead to this.
instead of a smile, since he physically can’t put one on his splotchy face, peter brushes the pad of his thumb over the corner of your lips. he gets up to leave the room, but you stop him with a “wait!” he freezes in front of you. you get out a hoodie from his pile of old clothes and stand up. “it’s cold.” you put it in his hands, earning a grin that he didn’t think was possible.
“thanks, y/n,” peter sighs and holds the hoodie against his chest. “goodnight. um,” this is the part where he’d usually say i love you. “sleep well, okay?” the replacement stings for both of you. you’ll have to learn to fall asleep without hearing that phrase first. as much as you didn’t feel it anymore, you’d become used to it. “you too, peter. night,” you say softly.
you head back to your bed while peter walks out the door. he glances at you once, and you’re already settling under the covers. he shuts the door behind him before finding his way to the couch.
your bed has always seemed too small. it’s gigantic without peter. you aren’t sure how you feel about that yet.
peter lays across the couch, the hood that doesn’t quite fit him pulled over his head. he’s only wearing it because you gave it to him. you doing that not even five minutes ago was how you backed up your love with actions. it’s so easy. silent tears spill from his eyes at the realization.
he wishes on every star that he could’ve figured out he wasn’t doing enough sooner. you’d be together right now, had he just caught on. there was a time he prided himself on knowing you fully and completely. how to turn you into the shy one with certain combinations of words, what your schedule was each week so he could plan his free time around it.
your relationship became something he thought would last unconditionally. if only he was able pinpoint the exact moment he went wrong.
you’re right in the other room. he can go in there and bawl, plead for you to take him back. how could he do that and claim to love you, though? you’ve made it clear you‘re over him.
the best way for peter to show you he loves you is by letting you live your life, without him in it.
-
you don’t see peter again for weeks. he moved back in with may, and you got to keep the apartment. you were the one who took all the care of it, anyway.
your semester ended at the perfect time because peter isn’t in any of your new classes. the city is too big to bump into each other. you’re free from the hold he had on you, which would’ve been four years long since yesterday. you’ve been good at picking up his broken pieces for too long, and now it’s time to pick up your own.
for all the hangouts you missed on his behalf, you made up for it. you called mj the day after your breakup and met for lunch. she never explicitly said it, but she took your side. peter had a feeling because when he had the same idea as you, to lean on his friends for support, she never reached out.
betty is indifferent, ned stays cordial with you. his real loyalty is to peter. you can’t blame him.
peter hasn’t been doing well since you broke up. he’s not eating enough, he can’t focus on work of any kind. you were right when you said he would forget how to breathe without you. he often wonders how you’ve been.
he finds out today.
you’re walking around campus, heading in the direction peter just came from. he has a class in the building your last one was. the two of you are on the same sidewalk, opposite sides. he almost doesn’t recognize you.
mj is on one side of you, a guy he’s never seen before with an arm around your shoulders. you’re all laughing about whatever dumb thing your professor said during the lecture. your hair, which is done in a new style, flows behind you in the spring breeze. a smile takes place on your glossy lips. the smile is directed towards that guy. your new boyfriend, peter assumes.
you look amazing, and not only physically. you seem happy with your small group of people. peter hadn’t been able to give you that happiness in years, so it’s nice to see you got it back somehow.
he must have stared too long because you notice him. you fall behind mj and your potential boyfriend, both of them wrapped up in discussing your next project. peter stops walking. you do the same. he’s not sure if he upset you, or what’s going on. his instincts tell him to apologize. his mouth stays closed.
that infectious smile of yours appears once again. you thought about peter yesterday, it being your anniversary and all. you’d only let yourself remember the good things. they outweighed the bad ones when you look back on everything.
“aye, grandma! get over here!” mj calls to you, your boyfriend nudging her side. “take your time, y/n/n. i’m not in a rush to write seven long ass pages.” you laugh to yourself at the two of them. peter fiddles with the zipper on his jacket. it’s from the drawer of things you used to wear. “one sec!” you yell back.
“hey,” you turn to face peter, who’s giving you a tight lipped smile. “how’ve you been?” “i’m okay. just, you know,” he shrugs and clasps his hands behind his back. there’s a short silence before peter says, “you seem good. really good.” he smiles for real this time. “yeah, i am. i hope you are, too,” you tell him and genuinely mean it.
you’d like to catch up soon, but it’s not right yet. you both need more time. “i’ll see you around?” you’re already starting to walk, backwards so you can see peter. “uh, sure. bye,” he gives you a quick wave and continues on his way.
you get back to mj and your boyfriend, his arm returning to your shoulders. they waited for you by the stoplight. “what’d ya get up to over there?” he teases, mj suspiciously watching your face for any tells. you carefully think through your answer with a grin. “love.”
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finduilasclln · 2 years
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Welcome to my Buddie Fic Rec List!
Since I read so many Buddie fics, and some of them are so good, I thought I’d share them in some handy lists. I’ll be posting them in different categories, and you will be able to find all the posts HERE.
Disclaimer: Always read the tags and warnings! Also, tastes differ. These are my personal favorites, which doesn’t mean they’ll automatically be yours of course. If you want to reblog and add some of your own favorites that fit the category, please be my guest! I always love discovering new fics. I will also add new recs of my own whenever I stumble upon them.
One last thing: Please like and comment when you’ve had a nice read. It means so much to authors to hear your thoughts! And don’t hesitate to share this post and spread the love for these fics around!
Buddie Fic Rec: "Getting Together".
I could read about them falling in love and getting together a million times...
falling, by elisela (@elisela) || 1298 words ||
Buck’s looking at him again. “It’s beautiful, isn’t it?"
“Yeah,” Eddie breathes, not looking at the view at all. He runs his thumb over the birthmark above Buck’s eye, then, gently, down to the one on his eyelid before moving his hand back into Buck’s hair.
Take Another Little Pizza My Heart, by Phraekycat || 6491 words ||
In which Buck helps Christopher with his Valentines for school, and discovers some things about himself.
OR
Buck is oblivious, but Eddie loves him anyway.
Mother's Day Blues, by hideeho (@agentlemuse) || 2983 words ||
It's the first Mother's Day since Shannon's death and Eddie's parents are in town. He's handling it as well as you'd expect. Fortunately he has Buck on his side.
die for you in secret, by extasiswings (@extasiswings) || 8046 words ||
Eddie Diaz is very good at being in love with his best friend. Which means, when Buck finds a baby and everything changes, Eddie is committed to doing anything he can to make sure Buck has whatever he needs.
If that means locking his heart away for a little while longer—or forever—he’ll do it.
It's probably for the best anyway.
[Companion fic to keep my brittle heart warm (give me peace)]
Medicine Man, by LovelyLittleGrim (@lovelylittlegrim) || 4152 words ||
Buck doesn't know what to do when Eddie kisses him on the forehead the first time (or the second time) but he does know he wants him to do it again.
i think i might have inhaled you, by aresaphrodites (@aresaphrodites) || 25994 words ||
How do you tell your best friend that you're actually in love with them? If you're Evan Buckley, you don't.
17 Steps to Inevitability, by allyasavedtheday (@littlespooneven) || 12024 words ||
Eddie doesn't plan for Buck to become part of his and Christopher's family; it just sort of happens. He doesn't plan to fall in love with Buck either; that just sort of happens too.
you can tell everybody this is your song, by woodchoc_magnum (@woodchoc-magnum) || 492714 words ||
"It's not a date if Chris is here with us."
At that, Buck's eyebrows flew up, and his face went pale. "A… date?"
Eddie nodded, a little nervously. "Yeah. This is a date."
as ordinary things often do, by hattalove (@hattalove) || 3997 words ||
“Uh, Chim,” he says, “why would we be kissing each other in the first place?”
“Oh, no reason,” Chimney shrugs. “That’s why I figured you’d be on board. Just don’t kiss each other for a week, which you already do. Easy money.”
spoiler: it's not easy money.
it always leads to you, by woodchoc_magnum (@woodchoc-magnum) || 24984 words ||
Missing scenes from Season 2 onwards, in which Buck becomes a fixture in the Diaz household, and he and Eddie unwittingly build a family together.
And fall in love, of course.
paint me a heaven with your bloodied mouth, by extasiswings (@extasiswings) || 3345 words ||
Buck.
Four letters. One syllable.
Eddie knows it’s a nickname. He doesn’t know why Buck picked it or why Buck seems to use it exclusively, but he figures it isn’t really his business. And also that it probably isn’t that deep—all of them use nicknames at work or otherwise in their daily lives. Eddie himself might find it weird if anyone outside of his immediate family suddenly started using his full name regularly after so many years of only rarely hearing it from anyone else.
So. Eddie calls Buck Buck. And he doesn’t think anything of it.
At least…not at first.
Let's not sleep together, by lasvegas_lights (@starlingbite) || 5047 words ||
It's been a month since Eddie left and Buck hasn't spoken to him since. The whole thing has left Buck angry, work just isn't the same and he's not sleeping. Turns out Eddie isn't sleeping either.
A.K.A: Six late-night conversations between Buck and Eddie after 5x10.
must be some kind of twist, I can get used to this, by soyxunxperdedor || 38794 words ||
He doesn’t remember much from last night, even less after the fourth or fifth tequila shot. So he certainly doesn’t remember bringing someone back to his room.
He steels himself for the lancing pain and cracks his eyes open.
Oh. Oh no.
This is either really bad or… Well, not really good, but just. Not really bad, and that’s probably all Buck can ask for it to be.
Because Eddie is in his bed, Eddie’s arm is wrapped around his waist, Eddie’s legs are tangled with his. And he has no idea why.
baby, say you'll always keep me, by hattalove (@hattalove) || 8251 words ||
“Yeah,” Eddie says, and the darkness behind his eyelids takes on a white edge. “Be good. Nice to be married,” he yanks on Buck’s t-shirt, “best friend.”
Finally, Buck takes a breath that sounds off somehow, but he laughs too, and that sounds normal, Eddie thinks. A normal laugh.
“Sure, Eds,” he says, and there’s his hand in Eddie’s hair again, a puff of breath on the crown of Eddie’s head like Buck leaned in to press a kiss there and then stopped, but why would he stop—“I’ll marry you if you remind me tomorrow.”
or the one in which joking about being married to your best friend is all fun and games, right up until you realize that you're not laughing.
stranger sunlight, still, by mmtion (@mmtions) || 64541 words ||
When the 118 find out about Buck’s secret thirst account on Instagram – to raise fire safety awareness, obviously – they make fun of him the appropriate amount and move on. Eddie, who has had some recent and birthmark-shaped revelations about his feelings, finds it a little harder to do the same.
Of course, Eddie would never invade Buck’s privacy by searching for and finding the anonymous account. Or looking at all the uploaded photos late at night. Or even directly messaging Buck’s secret account. That would be weird, because he’s certainly not planning on doing anything about his newfound attraction.
However, anonymous account @elbombero118 has no such limitations.
from the ashes, by casfallsinlove (@oliverstarked) || 7038 words ||
It makes the breath catch in Buck’s lungs. He doesn’t know how it’s possible when he’s just spoken to him but suddenly he misses Eddie with such a fierce intensity that it leaves him aching. He presses the phone to his chest so hard it hurts, but he wants the words inside of him, wants them bruised onto his skin and scratched into his ribs. You’re the love of my fucking life, he wants to say back. What he actually types is just as honest.
Sent 10:53pm I miss you.
-
In which Buck's father dies and Buck takes the long way home.
something to hold onto, by foxwatson (@eddiediazes) || 5185 words ||
There’s about a palm’s width of distance between Eddie’s knee and Buck’s thigh, where they’re both sitting on Eddie’s couch. It would barely take any movement at all for Eddie to just nudge his leg over a little further, press their knees together and let his rest there.
or the one where frank tells eddie he should work on letting himself want things, and eddie starts by cuddling with buck
let go of that whipping post, by foxwatson (@eddiediazes) || 4241 words ||
Eddie comforts Buck after a nightmare - only it's less like the nightmares Buck is used to, and more like a stress dream. Thankfully, just like always, Eddie seems to know exactly what Buck needs without Buck even being able to say that he needs it.
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jupiter and antiope
“i feel like it’ll become your pain again.”
kisaki. mikey. chifuyu. hanma.
content warning(s): blood mention, death mention, hanma being a “make me a sandwich” guy
—”look me in the eyes, and tell me you love me”: Kisaki has never been one to hide how much he craves your love, chases after your approval like a drug, and lives to see you by his side. He’s a dangerous man in that way; he has the power and the ability to convince you that he doesn’t fiend for your presence like he does. But you’re not one to care too much, you love him. Perhaps not as obsessively he does, but the way your heart leaps into your throat when you see him or the way your hands itch to hold him when he’s nearby are all indicators that you do reciprocate whatever it is that he feels for you.
You gaze into his blue eyes. Blue—like the sky at the peak of noon, shallow ocean waves that lap at your ankle in gentle kisses, baby flowers in the spring that bloom so beautifully before they’re gone within days. “I love you, Kisaki. I love you so much.”
“Do you mean it?” He whispers. He sounds less like a mastermind and more like a boy, trailing after you to make sure that your affections haven’t changed. “You love me for real, right?”
You raise a hand to cup his face, and Kisaki melts into your touch. His hand cups yours, and he cradles himself into your palm. Your hands are so, so soft and smooth, thrumming with hope and love and everything that’s good and worth fighting for in this twisted world. In contrast, his hands are calloused and rough and awkward. If your blood is life force, then his blood must be poison, tainting and drowning and dragging you under the tide with him.
“Of course I do, babe,” you murmur. Your voice is nothing more than a whisper, the kind that you use only for him. “If I didn’t love you, why would I be here? I love you so much. If you want me to say it over and over, then I’ll do that. I’ll say it as many times as you need me to say it for you to believe it.”
He breaks into a shy smile. “Then say it again. Look at me, and say it one more time.”
“I love you.”
—”it’s you and me, forever. no matter what”: Mikey’s words hurt you. You would have to be an idiot to not notice the hurt, the yearning, in his voice. He does this to himself so many times, pushing away those he loves so that he doesn’t hurt them when he inevitably ruins himself for their sake. So why do you continue to force your way into his heart? So why are you the one he turns to when he’s broken and crying at 3 in the morning? So why do you hold him to your heart and kiss his tears away instead of yelling and screaming at him and throwing him back onto the streets that he so sadly rules? You’re his everything and his nothing, his forever and his never.
You take Mikey’s hand in yours and rub your thumb over his knuckles. “No matter what. If you say that, you know that I mean it too. I won’t let you push me away again.”
“But-”
You shush him by pressing a finger to his lips. The skyline of the city twinkles with stars from where the two of you sit, at the edge of a skyscraper’s roof, swinging your feet at a dizzying height. This is his palace, his kingdom, his throne, and you’re but a witness to the breathlessly tragic unraveling of the main act. “No ‘buts’, Mikey. I mean it. You said ‘you and me’, and I fully mean being with you until the end.”
“Even if I die? Even if it means that you’ll crash and burn with me?” His voice sounds unsure and scared. You know that a life with him means heading into the darkness again and again, armed with nothing but your pure faith to serve as a flashlight and a heralding call into the unknown. Maybe you’re just a fool for trusting and loving him, but how could you not? His onyx-colored eyes quiver as if to say don’t go at you.
“Even if it means that. Even if it means flourishing and living with you,” you correct with a steady voice. You replace where your finger was mere moments ago with your own lips. The night wind is cold, blowing straight into your soul as if it were a mourning call, but you ignore it. Mikey’s mouth is warm and stable, and that’s all you need.
—”just hold me”: Chifuyu snakes his arms around you, holding you in the doorway to his own home. You know that he leads a dangerous life, one that he doesn’t want you to see nor one that he wants to give you as your lover. He’s always telling you that you deserve a better man: a man who isn’t a criminal, a man who doesn't have blood on his hands, a man who won’t drag you into his own messes. But whenever he comes stumbling into your home, with broken eyes and a broken heart, your first instinct is to listen to whatever it is he has to say.
“I’m sorry. I-I should know better than to come here,” he whispers into your ear. You shake your head, pulling him closer to your body. He doesn’t feel like a monster to you. He’s every bit your home as much as your physical abode is. Your arms feel so right wrapped around him, and you fit perfectly in his embrace. You know that you were made for him, every bit as equal as how he was made for you.
“You can’t ask for me to hold you and then say something like that,” you warn. “I’m not going to let go of you, Chifuyu. Let me hold you. I know that that’s what you want.”
He falls silent, and you know that you’re right. The dim light of your living room spilling out into the doorway reminds you of a sunset, the final glimmers of the safety of day on your skin. Chifuyu is the night, but like the crybaby moon, he comes yearning for the warmth of the sun, the comfort of someone he shouldn’t have.
“You’re too good to me,” he mumbles. “You’ll get yourself killed if you keep letting me crawl back to you like this. I don’t want you to get hurt because of me. You don’t know how many guys there are out there, waiting for a chance to tear open any weakness someone might have.”
“That’s on them.” Your hands clutch at the fabric of his clothes. “Let me hold you. I don’t think your love for me is a weakness, at all. So let your worry go, and let me be here for you.”
—”you’re so damn attractive. you know that, right?”: You almost laugh first thing in the morning. You don’t know what drives Hanma to say something like that. If anything, you’re the opposite of attractive. Your hair disheveled from just waking up, eyes swollen from all the sleep that escaped you, your body slumping down onto the bed, Hanma’s quick to catch you in his arms and coax you back into the sheets with him. His chest is broad and warm, and despite knowing that you need to wake up, you can’t help but relax again.
“Stop being so cheesy first thing in the morning,” you grumble, swatting at his hand when he squeezes your hips. “And no, I’m not going to do anything dirty for you either just because you said something sweet.”
“Who said I want you to do something dirty? Can’t I compliment the person I love without being yelled at?” Hanma chuckles into your neck, and you hum as he gives you a flurry of kisses up the side of your neck. “I think you’re the sexiest person on earth, even if you look like an ogre whenever you wake up.”
You scoff, kicking his legs indignantly. “An ogre! And here I was, thinking that maybe you were finally learning how to be romantic.”
“Sorry. You know that I’m not the kind of guy for that,” he replies. “Although if you need someone to beat the shit out of anyone annoying you, I’m your man.”
His hands wander up your shirt, his fingers tickling your bare stomach. You don’t need to look down to envision the characters for “sin” and “punishment”, symbols that would normally send every delinquent in Japan running for safety, resting right above your crotch. Hanma’s still a rugged and sadistic man through and through, but it’s in these small moments that he reveals his softer nature to you. Despite the fear that most associate with him, you can’t help but swoon into his chest a little.
“So,” Hanma starts, kissing the crown of your head, “Are you going to make me something yummy for breakfast, now that I’ve been nice to you?”
Right. So much for romance.
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prompt list + x
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hanazuma-inactive · 3 years
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defrost (nsfw) kaeya x top!male reader
pronouns: he/him
warnings: ice play!! slight degradation, orgasm denial/ edging, top male reader, bottom kaeya
a/n: this was edited by @kamihara, she really outdone herself in this one, professional kaeya simp lol
_____
“to think such an honourable knight such as you, the cavalry captain of mondstat, is now begging to cum. how shameful of you,” you let out a low chuckle as a provocative smile broke out on your lips, “i wonder what citizens would say if they saw their beloved and oh so admirable kaeya in this position?”
as a captain of the ordo favonius, you were a bright figure to the people of mondstat. a person who aided in saving the city from destruction, one of the heroes that defeated storm terror. of course, other knights had nothing but respect for you as your skill and talent was nothing short of impressive. many looked at you with a high regard due to your strength and position, this meant that many were intimidated by your presence and therefore fear approaching you.
however, there was one person who disregarded this and stuck by you anyways, kaeya alberich, the cavalry captain. out of everyone in the knights of favonius, you were the closest with kaeya. you enjoyed his company a lot, he was an interesting person who knew how to keep a conversation going, and while you're with him you could never find yourself feeling bored. he was as charming as he was cunning.
kaeya found himself enjoying your company too. the two of you have done lots of things together. going on missions, getting away with “knighty” duty, babysitting klee, and drinking at angels share. you know, all the fun things in life.
kaeya was a secretive person, and while you were curious about him, you respected his boundaries. perhaps this was the reason why he drew you in, besides his blaringly good looks of course.
there was no doubt that the man was attractive from head to toe. his silky navy blue hair fell down his shoulder with grace, his fringe complemented his smooth, flawless sepia toned face. his periwinkle eye held the sheen of a crystal, glistening as his long eyelashes framed it with poise. the diamond shaped pupils his eyes possessed could leave you in a trance forever. his open white shirt left his cleavage on display, contrasted with the black corset around his slim, slim waist. his slender legs brought him around with confidence and charisma.additionally, the intricate accessories he wore suited his personality well. all in all, kaeya was a pretty little thing.
all of this lead up to you harbouring romantic feelings for the cavalry caption. how could you not feel anything? he was perfect in every way.
the sound of kaeya’s voice snapped you out of your thinking. “y/n, any missions today?”
“nothing for you i don’t think, i gotta help jean with the paperworks though.” you sighed at the thought of a mountain of paperwork.
“great, well i’m off then you have fun doing whatever.” kaeya smirked at you, poking fun at your dread.
he started to turn around and walk off but you had other plans.
“wait. kaeya-” you speak quickly.
“hm?��� he hummed out.
“angels share? 9pm?”
a quizzical look washed over his face before he masked it with one of his cunning smiles.
“alright.”
little did kaeya know you had more in mind than just drinking with him tonight. today would be the day when you finally told him about your little crush on him.
night quickly arrived after a day of working with jean. you were pretty exhausted but still excited about what's about to happen later tonight. when you entered the bar, Kaeya was already waiting for you at the counter talking with the bartender, charles.
“ah, i see mr.l/n is here too. Your usual today as well sir?”
“yah that’d be nice, thanks charles.” you said as you took a seat next to kaeya
“you got it.” charles said as he left to go get your drink.
angel's share was the place you and kaeya loved the most. the kind of noisy background with people chatting. cyrus and jack talking about their gains for today, six-fingered jose still playing his lyre, the song was getting a little old but you didn’t mind, in fact if he changed the song you probably wouldn’t be used to it.
“so, what’s the special occasion for today? you usually don’t invite me to drink on weekdays.” kaeya said while swirling his drink and glancing over at you.
kaeya’s eyes always amazed you. you didn’t know the name of the grey-ish color but you could gaze into them forever. his smooth skin glowed under the dim lighting in the bar. you loved everything about the man, his dark blue hair, his perfectly shaped body, and the fact that you could see a little bit of his clothing. what kaeya said on the first day when you guys met was true, you did feel something for him.
“hm? can i not invite fellow knights to share a drink once in while without a special occasion.”
“well, not wrong there but…you seem like you have ulterior motives for tonight from the way you’re dressing.” kaeya said, smirking at you.
it was true, you purposely chose one of your best outfits today for kaeya, you wanted to impress the man not only from your combat skills, but also your looks. there was no secret you could hide from kaeya. he knew you too well and he always looked right through you. it could have just been kaeya’s observant nature but you like to hope it was something more than that.
“you’re right there, you really do know me too well, maybe i need to start hiding things from you a little huh?”
“you can try but i highly doubt it’ll work in your favour, mr.honorary knight.”
both of you looked at each other with a slight smirk as charles arrived with your drink. after drinking for a good while you could tell kaeya was getting a little tipsy. his movements were unstable, he shaked a little while walking and his eyes started to become hazy. what better time than right now to reveal your true plans for tonight, you were gonna fuck the shit out of the beautiful man. you wanted to hear him scream your name in pleasure as you break him, over and over again.
“why don’t we go somewhere else? y’know, somewhere more, quiet” you suggested while scooting closer to kaeya.
“i wouldn’t mind that.”
as soon as you heard those words you immediately got up and left with kaeya. your plan was going perfectly and the best part is about to come soon. kaeya wasn’t stupid, he was an adult afterall and he knew what you were trying to do. dressing up all sexy like that, getting drinks, going somewhere more “private”, what else could it have been.
the two of you arrived in your house and headed straight for your bedroom. kaeya has been to your house many times for many reasons and he knew where everything was so he didn’t trip or fall.
you placed a light kiss on kaeya’s lips while he laid on your bed.
“wait here~ i’ll be right back.”
this was where things would get, interesting
you opened your fridge to grab a small wooden bowl. the content inside was covered by a small white cloth. after grabbing that you went to grab some rope from a drawer you hid them in because you didn’t know what to say if someone saw those items in your house.
after bringing the items back you put them on the side and pushed kaeya down.
“what’re those?” he asked
(its a surprise tool that’ll help us later.)
“don’t worry about it sweetheart, just lay back and let me do the work alright?”
you brought a blush to kaeya’s face with your flirty words as he gave you a small nod, signalling you consent and approval. you kept invading kaeya’s mouth over and over again, you’re tongue so skillful kaeya was sure this definitely wasn’t your first time. the kisses ended after a while leaving both of you panting and a half an erection in your pants. wanting more, you began to take off kaeya’s uniform. his skin is so beautiful, you could also see his well defined body, just the perfect amount, not too buff, not too skinny. you licked your lips a little bit and looked up at kaeya with a smirk. when you put your mouth onto kaeya’s pink nipples, he squealed a little out of surprise but soft moans soon began to escape from his mouth.
“a-ah~ didn’t know you had this in you, honorary knight.”
“oh i know a lot more tricks that can make you feel good~” you teased.
as you continued to suck on kaeya’s smooth skin, you decided to spice things up a little bit. kaeya yelped as he felt a slight pain around his nipples. you remove your mouth to see a bite mark around it.
“to mark you as mine~”
“tch, you cocky little bastard.”
seeing the tent building up in kaeya’s pants, you decided to take them off and grant it some release. after you took off kaeya’s jeans you saw a small stain at the top of his boxers, showing that he felt good earlier.
“alright... this is where the fun part begins.” you said as you grabbed the ropes you initially put on the floor.
“restraining me? go ahead, let’s see if the honorary knight is all talk or he actually has something up his sleeve.” kaeya taunted
not liking his attitude, you forcefully tied kaeya’s hands behind his back and pushed him to the end of the bed facing you with nothing on but his boxers. now, the mighty kaeya alberich, is at your mercy.
“alright, we can do this in two ways. one, you listen to me, second, i don’t think you’ll like what’ll happen,”
kaeya raised his head a little and looked you dead in the eyes.
“i choose the second option”
you knew kaeya was the bratty type and it’ll only add to the fun to tame him. after hearing his choice you pushed kaeya back to where he was before and uncovered the bowl you had prepared earlier on the side. the bow was filled with medium sized ice cubes and it was till now that kaeya finally realized what you were trying to do.
“ice cubes huh? bring it on.”
“you asked for it~”
you grabbed one of the ice cubes and started to rub it on kaeya’s pecs, making circular motions and slowing moving towards the center where his nipples are.
“f-fuck that’s cold.”
you saw kaeya’s cock twitch a little when you first reached his nipples and you knew he was feeling good. moving on with your plan, you rested the ice cube on kaeya’s nipples and lifted his boxers where his cock is still covered but his asshole is exposed to you. right after that, you grabbed the lube that has been sitting in your nightstand and spread them on your fingers. without mercy you put 2 fingers into kaeya, trying to find his pleasure spot. sooner or later when kaeya started to let out tiny moans you knew you hit your target.
“feels good huh baby boy~”
“y-yah, and so what o-oh fuck~”
kaeya was sure feeling it, to a point where he started stuttering.
the constant teasing got kaeya close to his limit. he couldn’t hold it any longer. but you’re not gonna let him cum that easy are you? of course not, he needed to be punished for what he did earlier.
“a-ah y/n i’m gonna cum i’m gonna cum so hard- wait why'd you s-stop?” kaeya asked
“you decided to be a brat earlier didn’t you~? bad boys get punishment.” you said with a smirk on your face.
kaeya stayed silent, not a word coming out of his mouth, head hung low feeling embarrassed.
“to think such an honourable knight such as you, the cavalry captain of mondstat, is now begging to cum. how shameful of you,” you let out a low chuckle as a provocative smile broke out on your lips, “i wonder what citizens would say if they saw their beloved and oh so admirable kaeya in this position?”
“maybe~ if you begged a little i might reconsider, don’t you think so, pretty boy?”
kaeya finally lost his composure at this point, all he wanted was to cum from your touch.
“fine... i don’t care anymore.” kaeya growled.
“p-please y/n.” kaeya looked up at you with pleading eyes. “i want to c-cum, i want to cum so bad. i should’ve been a good boy from the beginning… i promise i’ll be obedient from now on, j-just please, let me cum…” kaeya begged
“that’s what i thought.”
satisfied with kaeya’s begging, you decided to grant him his release. you added another ice cube to the other side of kaeya’s chest while stroking his dick through his boxers. of course you didn’t forget to keep teasing kaeya’s prostate while you were at it. all these different stimulations made kaeya lose his mind. the male came through his boxers all over the place. semen spilled on his own stomach and chest followed with moans so loud the entire mondstat could hear him.
after he settled himself down a little, kaeya waited for you to untie him. you exchanged a kiss with him while you were doing so, smiling at each other thinking about what just happened. neither of you cared about the mess that you made because you guys were tired. listening to the birds chirp, you fell asleep with the dark blue haired male on your bed.
the two of you woke up in the afternoon to the noises of mondstat. you woke up a little before kaeya and from your point of view he was literally a sleeping beauty. you stroked his hair a little bit, causing him to wake up.
"y/n…good morning handsome."
"right back at you."
both of you giggled a little while holding hands.
"hey kaeya?"
"yes y/n."
"i've been meaning to get this off my chest and i don't think there will be a better time to say it than now."
"well go ahead, i'm all ears."
"you were the only one that ever stuck with me in the knights, everyone was afraid of me due to my strength except for you. you listened to me, you talked to me, and if it weren't for you i probably would've quit the job at the knights already." you took a deep breath and let out the words kaeya were waiting for.
"kaeya alberich... will you he my boyfriend?"
kaeya gave you a small scoff as a reaction and a light kiss to your lips.
"what reason do i have to refuse such a perfect man?."
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retroaria · 3 years
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can you do headcanon number 10 with karl <3 love your writing btw!
Karl Jacobs: Fluff Alphabet ✿
cc!karl jacobs x reader
pronouns: gender neutral
warnings: just swearing
here’s my 500 Follower Event ^o^
a/n: even if they aren’t requested in the event i’ll still be making fluff hc’s for all the cc’s i write so stay tuned !!
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A is for Affection (How do they like to show affection?)
other than physical touch (saving that for love language) karl’s favorite way to show affection is making you a huge part of his life. all of his friends and loved ones know just how important you are to him even without him saying anything. especially with blowing up and all the busy stuff he does as a creator, he wants you to be there with him every step of the way, never leaving you in the dark about anything. he’s always asking you for advice or ur opinion on certain projects, and if ur willing to help too that just makes him so happy. because at the end of the day, he wouldn’t be able to do it without you :)
B is for Bond (What kind of bond do you guys have? What could your relationship be labeled as?)
you guys are definitely the wholesome couple. there’s so much love and communication between you two that doesn’t go unnoticed by the people around you. on top of that, you guys share an adoration for each other that is just so freaking cute man
C is for Comfort (How do they comfort their s/o?)
in the beginning of your relationship, karl would kinda just try to cheer you up or make you laugh, but as things get more serious he’s very avid on getting you to talk about your issues so he can find the best way to be there for you.
D is for Dates (What are dates with them like?)
dates with karl are so fun !! he definitely likes just doing random stuff like shopping, going on long drives, or trying new places to eat and calling them dates. at the same time you guys also do bigger things like fancy restaurants (hes so rich oh dear god), amusement parks, long day trips, stuff like that.
E is for Emotions (How do they express their emotions around you?)
karl doesn’t strike me as a ‘heart on his sleeve’ kinda guy but around you, he’s definitely not closed off at all. aside from just talking to you and verbally being open, he also isn’t afraid to let you see him get upset or even cry about something. i see him as the type to value transparency in a relationship.
F is for Fiancé (How long into the relationship before they propose?)
karl definitely loves you, no doubt about it. but i feel like you guys really do enjoy just being together in the moment and not worrying about that stuff until much later down the line. you could be dating for a really long time and there’s still gonna be so much you can learn about each other. i’ll give karl an official number of 5 years. but maybe even longer. it’s a big decision guys remember!! especially because he does want you in his life forever, he wants to make sure the bond is truly like no other.
G is for Gentle (Are they gentle?)
depends. you guys have lots of playful banter and bullying but at the end of day he can be a big softy when it comes to you. so yes id say he’s pretty gentle 👍
H is for Hand Holding (How do they like hand holding?)
loves it. obviously. it’s karl jacobs. have you seen the guy?
I is for I Love You (Who said “I love you” first?)
him. it was really early on into the relationship and he kinda regretted saying it so quickly. there was just so much emotion going on for him at the time and he just blurted it out. after a little while longer tho, he gave a proper confession of his love.
J is Jealousy (Do they get jealous?)
everyone always says no for karl but YES. he does get jealous. not like angry jealous more like weirded out and uncomfy jealous. you can usually tell when he’s feeling that way.
K is for Kiss (What’s kissing them like?)
writing about kissing kinda makes me cringe but i had to think of something for k. it happens a lot probably. very sweet and loving. not just on the lips but karl will give you random kisses anywhere whenever he feels like it.
L is for Love Language (What’s their love language?)
PHYSICAL TOUCH AHHHH. constant hand holding, hugs, and cuddles. he loves being close to people he loves and it’s very obvious (i’m a karlnap shipper and analyzer sorry just had to confess)
M is for Memories (Their favourite memory with their s/o?)
karl’s favorite memories with you are usually on his days off when he just gets to spend an entire day being with you and only you. on top of that he also is very fond of the first time he ever met you and was like “ooo ahh wow you should like spend the rest of ur life with me or whatever Idk just something to think about ” lol.
N is for Nicknames (Their favourite nicknames given and received?)
nothing too soppy because i think karl would find it cringe but “babe” and “cutie” are the most frequent.
O is for Open (At what point do they start opening up to you about their life and feelings?)
after the first argument you guys have methinks. i feel like being caught in the honeymoon phase would kinda put the opening up process on hold, but once there’s a need for it it becomes a frequent thing.
P is for PDA (Are they into PDA?)
uhh not really. i know i said differently in my karl dating hc’s but i think he would find it a little cringe. hand holding is a definite because that’s simple ya know and hugging and small kisses and stuff but nothing more. he’s touchy as we all know but that’s just for you guys lol
Q is for Quiz (How much do they remember about you?)
karl loves loves LOVES knowing things about you. finding out stuff you guys have in common makes him so happy even just similarities in the ways you were raised and your childhoods and such. he’s a good listener and is always attentive. even if he wasn’t good at remembering stuff he would make the conscious effort to do so. 
R is for Romantic (How romantic are they?)
he’s such a little goofball gremlin that the thought of him seriously being romantic just doesn’t feel right but. he is. he loves doing stuff for you and just telling you how much he loves you and getting emotional about it. taking you out and making you feel like the luckiest person alive :)
S is for Security (How protective/possessive are they?)
he honestly doesn’t strike me as the protective type. possessive i would say maybe a little bit. he’s just so happy to have you and so like proud of himself for getting an epic s/o lol. he would never intrude on a friendship of yours or anything but if he was uncomfortable in anyway he would let you know before acting out.
T is for Try (How much effort do they put into the relationship?)
he puts everything he can into it. with him being so busy all the time things might get rocky but he makes such an effort to spend as much time with you as he can. being there for you is something that’s really important for him as well. any disagreements you guys have is resolved asap because he definitely doesn’t like leaving things on a bad note.
U is for Uphold (How do they show you they’re proud? What kind of support do they give you?)
he talks about you lots. anything that you make him or buy him is showed off on stream and any accomplishments you’ve made he would publicly congratulate you on. just showing to the world how great he thinks you are and how proud of you he is makes you feel so supported and he always wants you to feel that way.
V is for Vaunt (Do they like to show off?)
yes obviously ur the coolest most epic person and HE gets to be with you??? biggest flex ever if you ask me.
W is for Wild Card (A random fluff headcanon.)
karl likes doing stuff at the same time as you?? i hope that makes sense. like washing the dishes together or working on stuff. he also likes watching anime or movies/tv shows at the same time as you too. if a new episode of something just came out and he has the time to watch it but you don’t, he’ll wait for you so you can do it together. couple goals lol.
X is for X-ray (How well can they read you and your emotions/feelings?)
karl cares a lot about how the people around him are feeling and i think he’s pretty good at recognizing that. he’s extremely attentive to you and always makes sure ur comfortable.
Y is for Yearning (How much do they miss their s/o when they’re gone?)
between mr beast and all the work that he does it usually hits him when he finally gets home to relax and ur not there :( he does get really upset and a little needy about it but he tries his best to just focus on the stuff he needs to get done so he doesn’t miss you too much.
Z is for Zebra (What kind of pet would they want with their s/o?)
a brown cat named Cornelius 😎
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@themanifoldenjoyer @fantasy-innit @k-l-a-w-s @joyfullymulti
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eskelbigbang · 3 years
Text
Eskel Big Bang 2021 Masterpost
Here are all the fics and art made this year for the Eskel Big Bang. Congratulations on the hard work, everyone!
AO3 collection || #ebb works tag || #ebb art tag || #ebb fic tag
Below the cut is a full list of all EBB works:
Uprooted (T, No Pairing, 12k) by @rachofspades, art by @drachedraws
When a nondescript notice begging for a witcher's aid catches Eskel's attention on his way back to Kaer Morhen for the winter, he finds himself drawn in by his own curiosity despite his initial reservations. Once he arrives, it quickly becomes apparent that there's something more sinister going on than typical monster attacks, and he's determined to figure out what it is. Fic || Art (1) (2)
These Clay Hands (T, Eskel/Jaskier, 4.7k) by @aalizazareth, art by @hobbart-art
Eskel is a shy pottery instructor who meets Jaskier during one of his lessons. The two hit it off. Fic || Art
The Empty Safe Job (M, Eskel/Geralt/Jaskier, 18k) by @iboughtaplant, art by @gods-no-longer-tread-here
A team of thieves with complicated pasts take down the rich and powerful to help those that get left out from justice. Their latest job should be simple, but an unexpected adversary has Eskel confronting his past. Sometimes bad guys make the best good guys. Fic || Art
the broken vines are an open door (M, Eskel & Geralt & Yennefer, 5.2k) by @trissmarrygoals, art by @flyingyarn
Traveling through Aedirn with his newly acquired child surprise, Eskel stumbles upon a dead body - and with it, a mystery. Fic || Art
With you I'll never be alone (T, Eskel/Geralt, 5.8k) by @dat-carovieh, art by @mondfuchs
From their first meeting, through their whole long life Geralt and Eskel have always been there to comfort each other when one of them got hurt. --- Or five times Geralt and Eskel comfort each other through some kind of hurt and one time they're just comfortable. Fic || Art
Eskel Has A Good Day (G, Eskel & Wolf Witchers, 9.3k) by @gods-no-longer-tread-here, art by @phoenixandjacob
The Wolves (and bard) of Kaer Morhen go on a vacation to the coast, and have a good day. Fic || Art (1) (2)
Tu Me Manques. (T, Eskel/Jaskier, 8k) by @etcorsolus, art by @cvbeebop
In which, Eskel meets a bard who calms him. Body, mind, and soul. Story title is how the French say 'I miss you.' The more literal translation is 'You are missing from me.' Fic || Art
Little Red (M, Eskel/Lambert, 6.1k) by @miahclone, art by @llwynbleidd
Eskel helps Lambert while he's recovering from a serious injury. To distract him from the pain, Eskel tells stories of past hunts. Fic || Art
Constellations (M, Eskel/Geralt, 7.2k) by @dredshirtroberts, art by @dat-carovieh
Eskel loves Geralt but their soulmarks don't match - he'd know. They're witchers, and scars are their business. As he joins Geralt in retirement, Eskel figures whatever he can get with the other witcher will be enough. He might get a little bit more than he thought he was bargaining for, but Eskel's never passed up a good deal. Fic || Art (1) (2)
Trial By Fire (Eskel and Aza's Wild Ride) (E, Eskel/OFC, 11k) by @janzoo, art by @liaonyxrayne
When Eskel rescues his succubus acquaintance from witch hunters, their reunion becomes something more as they're drawn into the hunters' plot. What can they do against a twisted idealist and the danger he presents to witchers and non-humans? Fic || Art
Pardon Me While I Burst Into Flames (E, Eskel/Jaskier, 29k) by @ghostinthelibrarywrites, art by @wolfgeralt
When Eskel is hired to kill an incubus who ruined a noble wedding, he finds that his target is far from a bloodthirsty beast, a too-pretty court bard. Eskel spares Jaskier and they go their separate ways, with Eskel expecting never to see the incubus again. But Jaskier has other ideas. Fic || Art
I Could Eat the World Raw (E, Eskel/Jaskier, 7k) by @buttercupsanddandelions, art by @gods-no-longer-tread-here
“This is Eskel.” He pushes him slightly forward, “And he just had his conduit moment.” After becoming a mage, Eskel finds that he's been soul-bound to a little lordling. Fic || Art
Something we bury (M, Eskel/Geralt, 10k) by @heartoferebor, art by @craftgamerzz
“Where’s Eskel?” Ciri asks Geralt, frowning a little. “He went out to do more hunting and gather some potion ingredients. Should be back any moment,” Geralt reassures her. “Ah. Good.” She hesitates a little before deciding to forge right ahead with her next question. She’s asked everyone else in the keep, of course she’ll have to ask Geralt, too. “About his scars…” * Ciri wants to know where Eskel's scars came from, so she decides to ask everyone at the keep about them. Except, they all seem to have different stories... Fic || Art
Lord What Fools These Witchers Be (T, Aiden/Eskel, 21k) by @jayofolympus and @frenchkey, art by aviixrc
When Lambert brings Aiden to winter with him in Kaer Morhen, Eskel is catapulted straight into his own personal hell. It would be easier if he didn’t like the Cat. Instead, he finds himself falling head over heels for his brother’s boyfriend and trying to hide it from a pack of nosy Witchers. If only Aiden would stop flirting with him... Fic || Art (1) (2)
A Moment of Comfort (M, Eskel/OC) by @merpancake
An attack at a brothel begins with blood and carnage, but Eskel finds an unexpected peace in the arms of Cenna. As their paths continue to cross, Eskel carries that same peace within him on his journey through monsters and men. Art
Toussaint's Finest (M, Eskel/Geralt, 9.1k) by @kate-river, art by @justhereforeskel
Eskel is still roaming the Continent. But in recent years the Path has become harder and harder. Eskel has made it a habit to come by Corvo Bianco around vintage and this year's events might change a few things in his life forever. Fic || Art
Beneath the Shadow and the Soul (E, Eskel/Geralt/Jaskier, 32k) by @vix-spes, art by @buffskierights
Eskel had the strange feeling that everything was going to change when he passed through Dol Blathanna one year on his way back to Kaer Morhen for winter. He had been passing through a town and, instead of running away from him, someone had exclaimed “You’re a Witcher,” and proceeded to sing at him. He just hadn't realised how much of an impact it would have on him. Fic || Art
Daughter of Fire (T, Eskel/Geralt/Jaskier, 4.9k) by @kittynannygaming, art by @zmezagain
Witchers are sterile, that's a fact. No female human can bear their child. Well, the keyword here is 'human' and a succubus is very not human. And Eskel now has a sweet 7 years old daughter. Fic || Art
Break It Recklessly (E, Eskel/Geralt/Jaskier, 22k) by @anonymousblueberry, art by @nol-nol
From teenage tearaways to successful adults, Geralt and Eskel have always been inseparable. To the extent that when Geralt accepts a wedding invite with Eskel as his plus one, there’s the assumption that they have finally sorted their shit out and got together, forcing them to keep up the facade or cause chaos for the happy couple. What follows is a crash course in emotions, dating, and working out that love can burn long and slow for a very long time. Fic || Art
The Question (M, Eskel/Istredd, 40k) by @eskelchopchop, art by @stars-in-my-damn-eyes
Eskel's in Ohio when Yennefer calls. He’s reluctant to pick up; he’s still not over Geralt, and he's got zero desire to chat with Geralt's new lover. Turns out Yen isn’t his lover anymore, and this isn’t about Geralt. It’s about witcher’s work. Yennefer owns Portal, one of New York City's most popular gay clubs. A Post-Conjunction Entity (PCE) is hunting her clientele, leaving a string of withered corpses in its wake. The police are doing jackshit. Will Eskel come back to a city full of bad memories and take a job off the books to stop it? He'll sure as hell try. Along the way, he’ll cross paths with Istredd, a man with sorcerer’s eyes and a painful past of his own. If Eskel doesn't work fast enough, they both might become the PCE's next victims. Fic || Art
Is It Cold In The Water? (E, Eskel/Jaskier, 12k) by @jennyloggins, art by @jerry-of-rivia
His horse is tied to a branch a few trees out, and that’s where Eskel heads to grab his water skein, taking a deep drink and soothe his dry throat. Patting his horse’s backside affectionately on his way past her, Eskel feigns a stern voice to say, “Zuzanna, keep watch for me.” Her tail twitches as if to swat him away. Fic || Art
Everything I Want (I Can Find in You) by @eyesofshinigami, art by @phoenixandjacob
Eskel didn't think he'd ever see Jaskier again, sure the Cat witcher was only looking for a night of fun. But then he keeps showing up, taking Eskel to bed and leaving him little presents. It takes Eskel a bit, but eventually he realizes that maybe, just maybe, Jaskier means it when he says he wants to keep him. Or Eskel doesn't think he deserves nice things and Jaskier is determined to show him otherwise. Fic || Art
One Stop Shop; Tattoo's Piercings, And Love (M, Eskel/Jaskier/Lambert, 7.4k) by @jesheckah, art by @moondrunkart
When Eskel fumbles an invitation at a party to come into his tattoo shop, Jaskier and he move towards an explosive love. How many tattoo sessions does it take for the heart to know what it wants? Fic || Art
Entanglement (and other words for a mess) (E, Eskel/Geralt/Jaskier, 31k) by @violaceum-vitellina-viridis, art by @merpancake
Eskel has a hundred marks on his body, but a soulmark isn't one of them. Fic || Art
Beneath Each Other's Bones (E, Eskel/Geralt, 7.6k) by @pressedinthepages, art by @drachedraws
Winter at Kaer Morhen can be brutal. But Eskel and Geralt find warmth in each other in an effort to stave off the cold. Fic || Art (1) (2)
#9fe2bf on the Shore (T, Eskel/Jaskier, 4.5k) by @buffskierights, art by @phoenixandjacob
The sea roars with a vengeance, something angering the waves even as the stars shine brightly overhead in the clear night sky. If Eskel were a poet he’d say it almost sounded like a wail of mourning, the way the whitewater crashes upon the night black sand and the gathering foam, the sea frothing furiously. But Eskel’s always hated his poetry lessons so being a poet is firmly off the table. Fic || Art
lion in the wolf's den (T, Coen/Eskel, 5k) by @patchwork-doublet, art by @justhereforeskel
eskel is nervous being around ciri, afraid things will go south like they did last time. Fic || Art
Sugar Baby Blues (E, Eskel/Jaskier, 24k) by adevinecomedy, art by @pastelrune
Jaskier’s mind slipped back to a night several months ago when he was all worked up but had nowhere to go and a mountain of school work to get through. How it was just so much easier to log onto a camming website and watch someone perform seemingly just for him. The gorgeous, confident man on the other side of the screen had been so accommodating, even though Jaskier had been shy and hadn’t typed much into the chat. Modern au where Eskel is a Cam boy and runs into a bit of a financial bind. Enter Jaskier who just might be the answer to all his woes. Fic || Art
Winter Comfort (T, Eskel/Jaskier, 10k) by @myidlehand, art by @liaonyxrayne
Jaskier comes to Kaer Morhen to spend some time with Eskel, after briefly meeting him in the fall. And while both of them seem delighted to see each other again, Eskel starts to shy away from Jaskier's comments and flirting. It doesn't take a genius to see Eskel is having body image issue. Jaskier aims to help him through it. Fic || Art
The Subtle Knife (M, Eskel/Jaskier, 26k) by @major-trouble, art by @cylin-aka-ankamo
There's an assassin haunting the Continent. No one knows their name, everyone - that is, everyone in the know - calls them The Specter. If you want a rival out of the way, a political opponent disposed of, or a strategic target taken out, contacting The Specter gets the job done. For a price, of course. There's an art to subtlety, after all, and it wouldn't do to risk the attention of law enforcement. So there's no obvious cause, no knife to the back, and the deaths aren't usually remarked upon. The Kaer Morhen Agency, however, has noticed. One of their agents has been hired to protect potential victims, people scared that they've been targeted. And they have reason to worry. When Eskel's first assignment winds up dead of no discernible cause, it starts him on a search for the elusive Specter, hoping against hope to track down the assassin before they're hired again. Setting a trap for a ghost is something Witchers are used to. Setting one for a trained killer may prove beyond them. Fic || Art
No Funny Business (M, Eskel/Jaskier, 11k) by goldendaydreams, art by @nanero11
Eskel had long given up on finding his soulmate, his soulmark nothing but scar tissue from a house fire he’d survived as a child. Knowing that most people wait for their perfect someone, their destiny, didn’t stop him from falling in love with Jaskier, the nurse he met after a hunt gone wrong. Fic || Art
Stronger Than My Storm (E, Eskel/Geralt) by @rawrkinjd, art by @nol-nol
Eskel and Geralt were friends from the very beginning. They added the benefits later. It was another way to offer comfort and companionship when the rest of the world closed in around them, and Eskel was content with it for years. Until he wakes up one day and realises it’s become something more. He touches Geralt’s silver hair, wreathed in a halo of yellow sunlight, and allows himself to feel the cracks spreading through his heart. Witchers can’t love each other. It would only lead to suffering. Eskel realises he must weather the storm inside or let Geralt go forever. Fic || Art
Full of Life (T, Eskel/Jaskier, 6.3k) by @sternenstaub28, art by @llwynbleidd
When Eskel gets hired to solve the case of people disappearing in town, she didn’t know she’d find a friend and maybe even something more. or Beauty and strength don't necessarily make your life easier, a companion and love however do. Fic || Art
choices are the hinges of destiny (T, Eskel/Geralt, 7.5k) by @lutes-and-dandelions, art by @cassandrasartworld
After rescuing a fae from the clutches of death, they repay Eskel by helping him make a choice. -oOo- A story about what would have happened if Eskel had claimed his child of surprise. Fic || Art
Eskel Vs The Continent (And His Feelings) (M, No Pairing, 47k) by @chibitabathasloves, art by @zmezagain
Eskel decides he needs to leave Kaer Morhen after the fight with the Hunt. Where will it take him? And will he be able to face his feelings he desperately tries to ignore. Fic || Art
lookin' to the sky to save me (T, Eskel/Geralt, 10k) by @torynickles, art by @trissmarrygoals
Geralt slides his hand from Eskel’s shoulder to his back. And then. Then he keeps moving it, outwards, away from Eskel’s torso, where there should be nothing but air, but— “What the fuck?” he chokes, because he can still feel Geralt’s hand, sensation where there should be none. He shakes his head wildly, twisting his arm to reach for his own back. His fingers connect to something, but—it’s not his body, it can’t be his body, even though he can feel himself touching it. Because he’s made up of skin and flesh, bone and muscle, and this thing has all of those, but— It’s covered in sticky, damp feathers. Fic || Art
A Fine Night at the Faire (M, Eskel/Geralt/Jaskier, 12k) by Elensule, art by @liaonyxrayne
Eskel has been hurt by the world and hides for refuge in his little goat farm. He's found no reason to look for love, or much of anything else. But encouragement from his brother sends him to an unfamiliar locale; the renfaire! Maybe stepping out of his comfort zone was just what he needed. Fic || Art
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