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#savitar x reader
blue-sadie · 5 months
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New Day Has Dawned
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Imagine:
Being the only one savitar has ever truly communicated to and being the only one to talk him down from causing trouble, getting him not to hurt iris and confuses you so one day you go to him alone without backup and ask him why.
"You were the only one who ever treated me as a human being a person who has ideas the rest they only used me and they took you from me and now they can't because I won't let them I'll show them what it's like to be ignored and watch everything you love get taken from you"
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skylarmoon71 · 7 months
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Savitar (Flash) : Fanfiction - Chapter 4 A
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You’re both so close, yet, still on different sides.
“I don’t take orders.”
You nod. It was naive to assume he would just follow. You move in again, and it looks like he’s ready for a fight, but your hand moves to his neck and he almost holds his breath at how close you are. Your lips are merely inches apart.
“W-What are you-”
There’s a click and he looks down in surprise. He’s cuffed with power dampeners.
He looks pissed, rightfully so. Before he can make a move you draw your gun, aiming right at his stomach. You grin.
“Looks like you don’t have much of a choice. You can come willingly or unwillingly. I can drop you in the pipeline or we could just see what the rest of Team Flash decides, it’s your choice.
It’s obvious that he doesn’t like how easily he’s been subdued. Sitting in a prison isn’t exactly desirable.
“You really think the second I get these cuffs off I won’t hurt you.”
“I know you won’t.”
Maybe it’s the lack of distance that is so unnerving.
“Something happened when you spared Iris. I can’t put my finger on it, but something shifted. You’re different.” You search his eyes, and he wants to pull away. But your gaze feels like a weight that he can’t remove.
“Nothing has changed. I’m still the same. I’m me. Not Barry Allen.”
“I know that.”
“Then stop looking at me like that.” His tone is sharp.
“Like what? A friend that needs my help?”
“I’m not your friend.”
“Then tell me..tell me how am I looking at you?”
His exhale is a bit shaky. Right about now he wishes he could use his speed to intimidate. It’s agitating being in this position. You can read him well. It’s like you can see through everything and he hates it.
“They’ll never trust me, accept me. I’ll always be the stain that tried to break The Flash. Do you truly believe they’ll see past that.”
“That implies that you actually want to change.”
Savitar pulls his hand away at the implication and the gun drops from your hand. He pushes forward and you both tumble to the floor. His intention is to pin you down. But it backfires. You lock your legs around his hips, using your body to shift his weight. He grunts when his body smacks into the floor with you on top. You grab his cuffed hands, pinning them above his head.
Savitar’s eyes are wide in shock.
“Stop resisting.”
He expects anger, but your gaze holds sympathy.
“Please just..let me..please..”
Right now would be the perfect time for him to fight back. You’re vulnerable. Your words before weren’t completely wrong. You were in fact right something had changed. He could no longer see Barry’s life. Well, his life in Barry's eyes. It was as if he’d been severed. Like they were no longer bound. He supposed it had something to do with the changing timeline. Iris hadn’t died like it was made to happen. Everything was different. If he was no longer Barry Allen, then where were these feelings coming from?
Why did he feel so much pain looking at the way you were crying for his sake?
It was irrational.
He should resist.
He needs to resist.
“Okay.”
Your hold loosens at his words.
“I’ll try to change.”
Your face couldn’t have gotten brighter than it was right now, and for a moment, he convinced himself that this expression of pure joy was actually for him. 
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Im obsessed with flash again I realised again that I have a thing for bad boys. I don’t find Barry attractive or anything
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But Savitar is so fucking HOT let me tell you
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Another thing snart is hot too and he’s like 😩😩 fuck me
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honeybeezgobzzzzz · 11 months
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The Flash Masterlist
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🐝 Barry Allen
🐝 Eobard Thawne
🐝 EoWells
🐝 Harry Wells
🐝 HR Wells
🐝 Hunter Zolomon
🐝 Malcolm Merlyn
🐝 Nash Wells
🐝 Savitar
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mxacegrey · 9 months
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Honey! Barry messed with the timeline again!
Series Masterlist
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Synopsis: After Barry's changes to the timeline, the story of one family changed. With a father from the past, a wife outside the timeline, a son in the future, and another in the present, Barry will learn the laws of time should not be messed with.
Flip Side
Not again! (20/6)
Nightmares (22/6)
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Space ~ B.A.
A/n: LOVE touching on the way Iris and Barry create their relationship by high key sabotaging every other possibility bc they feel inevitable... great shit.
Request: “Barry x male reader, reader and Barry been having issues so reader goes to stay with Kara for awhile.” By anon
Word Count: 2,000+
MASTERLIST
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"So... are we going to talk about that?"
Y/n's jaw worked as he mulled over Kara's question. He couldn't expect her not to ask questions after all of that. She was a good friend, she worried. And Y/n didn't want to spend this entire trip running from his feelings. It would only make things worse.
On the other hand he really didn't want to talk about it.
But that may have been him trying to run from his feelings. Like usual. How well did that ever go?
He looked at her, taking in her barely contained curiosity and anxiety. The last time she had run into Barry and his boyfriend the two were newly in love after ages of pining and beating around the bush. They were full of relief at being able to hold hands and use pet names, and got borderline ridiculous if they ever kissed. Kara had joked they were the goal; the base line. Someone would look at her that way someday.
Now the two men were cold and distant, and when they'd gotten Kara the help she needed and Barry went to go back to his own world Y/n had asked to stay? In an entirely different universe where Barry Allen didn't even know who Y/n L/n was. Had never even heard of him. They were complete strangers in this world.
Sighing, Y/n leaned against the desk behind him and Kara tried not to grin as she realized he was about to talk about his feelings. Y/n never did such things no matter how many times she prodded and begged - but this was not a situation that called for smiling or teasing. She listened instead as Y/n began, "Barry and I have been having problems."
Kara raised an eyebrow. She was hesitant to push such a delicate string of luck but it seemed Y/n was about to stop and he really hadn't said much yet. "Problems?"
Once he started he couldn't stop. "First it was the newspaper with Iris' byline. I mean, he's been in love with her for near his entire life and everything was screaming that she would choose him back eventually. Eddie died, Patty and Linda didn't work out for several reasons - mostly because he couldn't open up to them. But that's not-" He closed his eyes, realizing he was going off on a tangent. "The point is," he began again slowly. "Barry and Iris are like, soulmates? Or something? And it started with the newspaper but then there was Earth 2, and the fact that they always know each other everywhere we go - even if vaguely. Like they're drawn to each other. Inevitable. There are worlds where I don't know Barry Allen and he doesn't know me, but they always have each other."
Slowly, Kara asked, "You're jealous of Iris?"
Y/n scoffed. "I'm not just mindlessly jealous. It wouldn't bother me so much if the name on the by line of the newspaper had changed. If it said Iris West instead, or Iris soemthing-else. But it doesn't. It still Iris West-Allen. And I feel like... a filler." His shoulders sagged and his face twisted with agony. "It doesn't help that he started to drop our plans to hang out with her. And I realized that actually he always prioritizes her. Our plans never overlap, like he's desperate not to have to choose, and then they do and he chooses her. And it's fine, she's family, but I thought I was too. I thought we'd at least be equally as important. And then Savitar comes and he goes after Iris - still. Iris and Barry weren't together, but his life falls apart if she dies. Like-" He blinked tears out of his eyes. "Like she's his whole world. Cisco can't save him, or Caitlyn."
"Or you," Kara realized, her face crumbling as it fully settled in.
The man shrugged. "Or me. And I tried bringing it up to him but he refuses to acknowledge it and scrambles to avoid the topic and I feel like he knows he's in love with her but doesn't want to admit it. I feel like I really am filler and he knows it, that his very atoms are waiting for her and it's just this unspoken inevitability. I'm only here for now and that's it and I'm not supposed to address it, I'm not supposed to see it, but I do and that really sets him on edge. Or- something does at least. I don't know! He won't talk to me!"
Immediately Kara pulled Y/n into a hug. Y/n let her, curling into her comforting warmth and knowing he could fully collapse and she would be fine. "Would it help if I helped you work through what other options there are? Discussions are hard to have if you have one out come stuck in your head, and then often turn into arguments that accomplish nothing."
Chuckling, Y/n wiped his face. "You're so smart Kara." And he meant it so genuinely she couldn't even joke that he was full of it. He seemed relieved to be able to talk about it, talk through it. She believed that truly was the case. "Please," he sighed. "Please tell me there are other options than what I think there are."
Kara hummed, tightening the hug for a split second before leaning away so they could meet eye to eye as they spoke. This was a conversation where he needed to know she was being absolutely truthful and genuine. "Well, first of all he could have the exact same fears as you. He could truly and deeply be in love with you and be scared that it'll all be for nothing. Fate and knowing your future - it';s a terrifying thought. Especially when no matter what you do, it never changes."
Y/n nodded. That was a perfectly logical option. "Anything else?"
She was ready for the question. "His life has been really difficult. He's constantly losing people, and being a superhero is extremely hard on a person. It's demanding and draining and leaves no room for even a single mistake. You're gambling with the life of every single person. Their happiness and stability. It's not a reason to treat anyone badly but I could understand if his work life and super hero life being so complicated and dangerous doesn't leave a deep desire for a normal, more straight forward life. Maybe he got it in his head that things with you were supposed to be easy and now... they're not. And he's too burnt out or anxious to address it."
Oh. Very quickly Y/n was calming down. Hearing all the other alternatives were very grounding and loosened the pit of doom in his stomach. "Anything else?"
Nodding, Kara continued. "He may not be taking your emotions seriously and either isn't realizing how your emotions are affecting you, or thinks they're some kind of accusation. He may even not understand that when you bring this up its concerning how you feel about it and not necessarily about him or anything he's doing at all. It's a pile up of things that all point your brain in one direction, and the way that makes you feel may be irrational or very rational, but either way he isn't the person who chooses Iris. And he may be one day, or he may not, but if he thinks you're accusing him of some sort of cheating when he couldn't imagine ever doing something to you?" She shrugged. "Like getting mad at someone for doing something in a dream. And it still means something to you but he isn't clocking that - all he can see is you blaming him for something he didn't do."
Y/n actually had the audacity to smile. "We would argue over me feeling insecure and it making him feel like I hate him. Or doubt him." He rolled his eyes but there was a little fondness there and Kara felt hope surge through her. Not all was lost yet. "We would end up arguing like we are over both of us just being insecure and not communicating it int he way we need to." He sighed, long and laboriously.
Kara just decided to skip to another option. "Or he's being an asshole and he does know it upsets you but he just doesn't want to acknowledge it or take it seriously."
They looked at each other for a second before slipping into soft, breathy laughter. It was weak and quiet but Kara wrote it down as a win. The idea that Barry would be so harsh and cruel truly was laughable. Maybe another Barry, another universe, but not this one.
After a second Y/n deflated again. Not as broken down but definitely exhausted. "What do I do if he won't talk to me? I can't just not know."
"Tell him that." When Y/n seemed doubtful, kara shook her head. "I'm serious. Say it even before you start the conversation. No warning, no chance to shoot you down or change the subject. Lay down the law. If you need this, you need this. It doesn't matter what he's feeling about the situation - you need to talk about this. This is a need for you; a deal breaker. If you break up you break up. He doesn't deserve you if he can't get over himself for an hour to talk to you and give you something you actively need."
Y/n melted in relief, eyes wet. "You're an amazing friend Kara."
The compliment, bursting with appreciation that could not be put into words, made Kara grin. "You deserve a good friend. Come on - we can take a few days before you have to go back."
So they did. A little less a month passed before Y/n went back. neither of them had meant for it to go on quite so long but Y/n's powers that were so often utilized by Barry were perfect for the threat Kara was facing and beating the bad guy was the last step. They had to go through so much before they could do that. It kept them. 
When he did go home, there was something different about him. He got to see more and experience more. He realized how much pressure he was putting on Barry and codependent he'd become. he seemed finally completely at peace with whatever happened - whether or not they broke up, he knew he'd make it through - but was also ready and willing to fight for it.
If only Barry would fight too.
In the end Kara had been right. Her very first guess had hit the nail on the head, and it had all come undone the second Y/n set a hard boundary. He needed this and Barry delivered. Their relationship was important enough to the speedster to put aside fear or pride and face it. They had a long talk about the whole situation and how out of control they both felt. How that scared Barry even more because he didn't want such a future. Because he wasn't allowed to be out of control like he was now or people died. Y/n clarified his feelings not being a reflection on Barry as a person and the kind of person or partner he was, and that seemed to help too. They decided at the end of it all that no matter what happened they loved each other and nothing could get in the way of that. That even if Iris and Barry did end up together, it wouldn't be the Barry that was now.
That Barry was Y/n's.
For the first time neither of them felt the need to check to see if Iris' surname had changed on the byline. It was Cisco instead who came crashing into the room, eyes wide with worry. He pulled up the article and pointed out the byline.
Iris West.
No Allen attached.
The article was the same, with a missing Barry, but the byline was different.
Barry and Y/n looked at each other, eyes opened for the first time. It was almost a slap in the face to realize that Iris and Barry ended up together in this world only if they thought they did. That the anxiety of the felt inevitable could destroy all of their relationships, and that the second they decided it didn't - it didn't.It was beautiful in a way. And suddenly they both felt that they could do so much more... 
And they did. Together.
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Male Readers: @ravenpuff-oli @sortzz @fadedver
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just-my-fandom · 1 year
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Call It (Cisco Ramon x Allen! Reader)
Summary; After Barry speeds to the future to see his sister getting killed by Savitar, team flash has to find a way to prevent this from happening. Cisco grows protective over the reader, deciding to call it quits when enemies come and go too quick for him to count.
Warnings; Yelling, cursing, stabbing, coma, crying, one year time skip, mentions of hate for body image. Reader and Cisco leave the team. Starts with Savitar then cicada comes in. I’m stating for the sake of the story that the years are not right, just an estimate!
Taglist; @livingwrite-andrepeat
A/N; Here it is!! This is a long one (like, 7k worth), and I honestly really posted it for myself since Cisco isn’t super popular anymore, but I’m proud of it. Alternate ending to “You Know I Love You, Right?”
(D/N) means daughters name.
Small timeline change- Caitlin is in this as Caitlin, she is not killer frost.
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July, 2017, four months until destruction.
“Hey,”
A hand rests on your bare shoulder. You turn, smiling warmly at Barry Allen’s taller figure, “You look great,”
“Thanks,” Your breath is light, hands running down the front of your sweater-like dress, “Iris helped pick it out,”
Barry then glances over to said woman and the rest of the group, who, too, were dressed up from the event of HR attempting to reopen STAR Labs, “Hey,” He repeats, nodding his head over his shoulder, “I need to show you something,”
“Okay,” You nod back, glancing at your friends grouped together before following your friend at a slow pace, “What is it?”
Barry leads you into a hidden room. A room you recognize that used to be Eobard Thawnes, which worries you as to why he has brought you into the room of your old enemy.
With a click to the button on the single stand, Barry steps back to allow a projector to arise, showing both you and him an article, “Look at this,”
“The Flash vanishes after Crisis,” Your brows pinch as you glance to him, “I don’t understand. What am I looking at?”
“An article. From the future,” Barry starts, eyes flicking back up to the projector, “Look who wrote it,”
Your eyes move to follow his gaze, “Written by Iris West-Allen,” You lift your shoulders, “Okay? You and Iris get married. That’s wonderful, Bar,”
“No,” Barry shakes his head, “You originally wrote this article. Somethings changed,”
“Maybe I quit,” You sigh, reaching up to curl a strand of hair behind your ear, “I’ve been talking to Cait and Cisco about staying home with (Your/Daughter/Name), it’d make sense,”
“That’s not why it changed to Iris,” Barry can see your irritation as he leads on, your figure turning to face him as if urging him to hurry to his conclusion, “When I threw the Philosophers Stone into the Speed Force, I ran to the future,” He pauses to clench his jaw, “You die, Y/N. I-I saw it,”
“Die?” Your breath comes short, in disbelief as you look back to the article, “From what?”
“Savitar. He was holding you and he stabbed you. Right in front of the whole team,” Barry’s hand raises to his hair, tugging at the locks,
“How long?” Your eyes stare at the floor, hearing Barry’s hum of confusion before lifting your eyes to him, “How long until I die?”
“I won’t let that happen,” Barry steps up, hand at your arm as you clench your jaw, “I won’t. I swear on our parents lives, I will protect you,”
Your hands wipe at your eyes, hard, heaving a deep sigh, “We have to tell the others. I can’t stand to be one of the only ones that knows when we can try to stop it but- what if we don’t?”
“We will,” Barry breathes, “I promise, Y/N. I- we will do whatever it takes,”
“I hope you’re right,” You step back, out the hidden door and to the Cortex and to where Cisco instantly questioned your reddened face.
. . .
“So… all this happened while you were in the Speed Force?” Caitlins questions breaks the silence of the cortex. You can see the gears turning in everyone’s heads. Processing it.
You still haven’t.
“When I threw the Stone in, I went four months into the future. That gives us four months to figure out what needs to be changed and how we can stop him,” Barry exhales, looking to you where you leaned against the Control Panel in silence,
“Y/N?” Cisco speaks up, so you raise your eyes to him across the Cortex. “What’s going through your head?”
You lift a hand, waving it in front of your face with a pinch of your brows, “I’m fine. I think,” You bare down on your teeth at a lump that forms in your throat, “I need a second,”
The team watches as you depart from the Cortex in quick steps. Cisco worriedly follows after you while Barry rubs a hand down his face,
“Hey,” Cisco’s hand catches your wrist, twirling you to face him at the same time you cough out a weak breath, “Hey. Look at me,”
Your eyes look up at him on demand. Blurred with tears, you attempt to clear your vision as his hands raise to your face, wiping the tears from your skin, “You’re allowed to be scared. It’s okay,”
“I’m sorry,” Your whisper is harsh, “I don’t want this to happen. I can’t leave her,”
“We’re gonna figure this out,” He reassures, eyes on yours as his thumbs wiped below your eyes, “I promise,”
You nod, eyes shut when he rests his forehead against yours. His hand raises to the back of your head, hearing his best friend call behind him so you pulled away and wiped your face,
“HR thinks if we go back to the place I saw it,” Barry starts, watching you flinch at the mention, “We can find details that may help us change the future,”
“And how’re we supposed to do that?” Cisco asks, tiredly, “Go back into the speed force?”
Barry’s nod is slow, “You might be able to help,”
“I’m gonna go home,” You sigh, raising your hand to your forehead as Cisco turns back to you, “It’s late. It’s a lot, I think I just need sleep, and I need to see (D/N),”
“I’ll let you know what we find,” Cisco murmurs, pecking your lips before staring at you for a mere second, “I love you,”
“I love you too,” Your smile is weak before you teleport from their vision, Cisco exhaling a deep breath before turning to face his brother in law, “Let’s do this.”
September, 2017, two months until destruction.
Cisco steps into a silent apartment. He drops his keys on the counter with a tired sigh, turning to face the inside of his home.
Silent until he hears a loud giggle, one that brings a smile to Ciscos face despite how exhausted he is. He steps towards the hall of his apartment, where the bathroom door was open, light shining out into said hallway.
He leans against the doorway as his eyes settle on you, sitting on your knees beside the tub after having pulled (D/N) from the water, your child wrapped in a towel and leant against you.
“I love you, you know?” Cisco hears you murmur, and Cisco watches his daughter nod against your neck, your lips on her wet hair. She leans back to pat at your face, eyes spotting her father over your shoulder,
“Daddy!”
You glance over your shoulder at her shout, looking up at Cisco as he steps into the bathroom, kneeling down behind you to tickle (D/N)s neck, before leaning over to peck your cheek, softly,
“Anything?” Your eyes meet his, his head shake light as you frown, allowing Cisco to stand and pull (D/N) from your arms, taking your towel wrapped child into her bedroom,
“What pajamas are we thinking tonight, huh?” Your mind drifts as you listen to your husband, reaching over to drain the tub water and push to your feet, silently picking up her dirty clothes to toss in the hamper, “Spider man? I think you should wear the flash. Huh? Like uncle Barry? No?”
Your lips pull at this, moving towards the bedroom opposite of yours as Cisco pulls a Spider-Man shirt over (D/N)s head, then ruffling out her curls on her head,
“Bedtime, mi amor,” Cisco states, pulling the blanket out so (D/N) pouted but dropped onto the bed, “How does pancakes sound in the morning? Hm?”
“You always burn the pancakes, daddy,” (D/N) giggles, eyes looking at you when you sit on the edge of the bed, “Mama can make them!”
“I’ll make them, sure,” You smile, tucking the blanket beneath her chin, “Sleep good, baby. Maybe after breakfast we’ll go visit Papa Joe, hm?”
“Papa Joe!” (D/N) sticks her arms up, before shimmying under the blanket, allowing you to kiss her cheek as Cisco kisses her forehead.
You softly close the door to her bedroom, breath trembling as you exhale, hands at your face.
“Hey, hey,” Ciscos arms wrap around your shoulders, pulling you against him, “I know,”
Your sniffle is weak as you press yourself to his chest, lifting your head to look at him so his hands slid to your face, thumbs wiping beneath your eyes,
“I love you, baby,” Cisco whispers, your nod weak as his nose brushes yours, “It’s gonna be okay,”
October, 2017, one month until destruction.
“Okay, what if-,” Cisco paces in front of the control panel, Caitlin seated beside you while Barry stood to the side, “What if Y/N teleports at the second just before she’s stabbed?”
“We’ve already looked into that, Cisco,” Barry states, “The timing would have to be just right. One second too early, and Savitar is chasing her down. One second too late…”
“Well does anybody have any other ideas?” Cisco blurts, “Huh?! We’re running out of time!”
“Cisco-,” “What if it was Iris? Huh?” Cisco cuts, your eyes fluttering shut, “What if you had a daughter who doesn’t know what the hells going on, who doesn’t know that she could potentially lose her mother in less than two months?!”
“Cisco,” You raise to your feet, Cisco shaking his head with a deep sigh, hands in his hair as you step up to him, grasping his wrists, “Baby, look at me,”
Ciscos pinched eyes open to stare at you, a tear slipping down his cheek, “We have to think of something. We have to,”
“And we’re going to,” You whisper, hands now at his face to wipe under his eyes, “I’m going to be okay. We’re going to figure this out, and we’ll both be there to watch our baby grow up,”
Cisco sniffles, roughly, eyes shutting again so your arms wrap around his shoulders, pulling him forward so his own arms loop at your back, holding you firm against his chest. His nose ducks into your shoulder, hiccuping against the fabric of your sweater.
“I love you,” He whispers, Caitlin’s lips pressing together tearfully at the interaction, “I can’t lose you,”
“We’re gonna figure it out,” You lean back, Ciscos hands sliding to hold your waist as his eyes flicker across your face, “Let’s go get some water, come back, and restart. Okay?”
November 2017, the day before destruction.
Your hands tremble. Sitting at the control panel, your eyes stare at the blank screen. It’s only twenty four hours away. No plan has come up.
Your exhale is sharp, hands raising to your face to notice your fingers are ice cold, frozen with terror. “Hey,” Caitlin’s hand at your shoulder startles you so hard your body jerks, head turning to look up at your best friend in fear.
Her brows pinch, worriedly, kneeling down by your chair as your hiccup comes choked, head shaking as you raise your hands back to your face, “Hey. Y/N, breathe, honey,”
“I-I can’t,” Your exhale releases a sob, the tears hot on your cheeks as you gasp, “I’m so scared. I don’t want to leave her. I don’t want to leave them,”
“We’re going to figure it out,”
“When?!” You don’t mean to shout, guilt on your face as you glare down at where she knelt, “It’s going to happen in twenty four hours, Caitlin! I should be home with my daughter right now, but instead I’m freaking out because I’m going to die- and we can’t stop it,”
“Breathe,” Caitlin soothes, your back leaning into your chair as you tilt your head back, coughing up a sob that hurts your chest.
“I’m so scared, Cait,” You whisper, your best friend shifting to sit in the chair beside you, “She’s not even two yet. I won’t get to watch her go to kindergarten. I won’t get to watch her graduate,”
You sigh against your hands, sniffing, “And Cisco…I can’t leave him to raise her alone,”
“I want to promise that we’ll figure something out,” Caitlin starts, “But we both know that a promise like this is something we can’t keep,”
“I know,” You murmur, rubbing your temple. “I don’t know what to do,”
“Ciscos worried about you, honey,” Caitlin speaks, reaching to squeeze your hand, “And he’s scared, too,”
You nod, allowing another tear to slide down your jaw. You shift to stand, wiping your hand under your eye, “I’m gonna go try to find him,”
Ciscos easy to find- cooped up in his lab when not in the Cortex. The smile you give him is weak, the redness in your eyes evident when he turns to you,
“You busy?” You murmur, him shaking his head as he sets down the tool in his hand, arm already reaching around your shoulders,
“Never too busy for you,” He allows you to press yourself against him, head tucking under his chin as he exhales slowly, “You okay?”
“As okay as I can be,” You sigh, eyes falling shut as you let the man just embrace you. God knows its possibly one of the last times, “Just tired. Thinking too much,”
Cisco hums, lips pressing to your hair, “Yeah,” He sighs, cheek turning to rest on your head, “Me too,”
You inhale, lifting your head to flicker your eyes across his face, “Are we gonna be okay?”
Ciscos hands slide to cup your face, nose brushing yours. “We’re gonna be okay,” He nods, eyes glossy. He nods, lips pressing between your brows with a deep sigh, “We’re okay,”
Late November, 2017, the day of destruction.
Time falls still. Team Flash all stand frozen in terror. It happened. It really happened.
Savitar won. All those months trying to change the future was a fail. He knew it.
Cisco’s shout is what drags Barry to speed up and catch your near falling figure. Blood already stained your jacket, body limp against his suited form as he panicked for his best friend.
His sister.
“Y/N!” Cisco’s terrified cry gets closer as his footsteps skid, dropping down at your other side to pull you from Barry’s grasp, “Hey! Hey, baby!”
Tearing his goggles from his face, Cisco’s eyes brim red as his gloved hand held your face to look up at him, your own eyes hazy from exhaustion, but wide in terror.
“It’s okay, it’s okay,” Cisco’s thumb brushes over the skin, eyes flicking back and forth across your face, “Stay awake for me, okay? Can you- can you stay awake?”
“Cisco-?” Your lips part in a wheezed breath, lifting your head in an attempt to look at the damage, but Ciscos hand tightens at your jaw, shaking his head as he sniffles.
“No, no. Look at me. Look at me,” His pleas are weak, free hand pressed to the wound so you hiss, “You’re okay, baby. You’re gonna be okay,”
Your head shakes, barely, blinking away the black spots but only causing more. “It hurts,” Your eyes flick to Barry, eyes then pinching shut in pain.
“Get her to the lab,” Caitlin’s sudden figure behind Barry is rushed, and Barry barely processes her demand, “Now, Barry!”
. . .
An hour later, the team of five all stand throughout the Cortex. While Iris watched Barry pace, HR stood close to Caitlin’s lab door, all while Cisco sat in his desk chair, Joe beside him.
Ciscos eyes stare at the blood on his hands. Yours. With a trembling breath, Cisco finally looks up upon hearing Caitlin’s footsteps, as does the rest of the team to see the relief on her face.
“She’s going to make it,”
Ciscos exhale is sharp, head falling forward in his hands as Joe grasped his shoulder, Ciscos fingers clutching at his hair. He stands up, Caitlin nodding her head to lead him into the lab, where they find you, out and still covered in blood.
“We’re going to have to keep an eye on her for the next couple of days,” Caitlin’s hushed voice speaks, Cisco sinking down in the chair by the bed to grasp your hand, “Her heart rate seems stable, the blade went through both her back and her chest…”
Cisco nods, swallowing thickly as he rests his forehead to your hand, eyes shutting, tiredly.
“Do you want me to go get her some new clothes?” Barry speaks this time, voice hoarse, “And sheets?”
Cisco opens his eyes to see the white sheets of the bed have been stained red. Along with her clothes, and almost every inch of her skin.
“No, I can go,” He musters, sitting up, “Felicitys at the apartment with (D/N), I think I’m gonna bring her here and we’ll stay for a night or two,”
“Okay,” Iris breathes, nodding, “But let one of us drive you, please,”
. . .
At the apartment, Felicity instantly stands upon the arrival of both Cisco and Barry. “Please tell me she’s okay,” Felicity begs, Cisco silently walking by her to enter your daughters room. Felicity looks at Barry, eyes wide, “Is she okay?”
“She’s alive,” Barry nods, Felicity immediately exhaling, “We’re gonna have to keep an eye on her for a while. But she’s alive,”
“Oh, thank goodness,” Felicity nods, shortly, turning when Cisco shushes (D/N) softly, him now holding the whining child who curled back into him and almost instantly fell back asleep,
“Can you grab Y/N some clothes?” Cisco asks, exhaustedly, “Third drawer and left side of the closet. I’m gonna pack (D/N) a bag,”
“Are you sure?” Felicity asks, “I can stay here with her while you’re at the labs,”
“I want us all together, thanks,” Cisco smiles, weakly, “I need to be with her. Felicity-,”
“You don’t have to explain,” Felicity nods, a third time, “I understand. Let me take her and you pack her a bag, okay?”
December 1st, 2017. The day after destruction.
Cisco finally finds himself dozing off.
Seated next to your bed, his arm rests at the edge, the resting down while his gaze kept towards the corner of the lab, where your daughters playpen sat, allowing her to comfortably sleep.
But he feels a pull. He thinks it’s his own hand muscle spasm, but when his fingers are tugged at a second time, his head shoots up so fast he feels dizzy, eyes instantly looking up to your face.
Your brows pinch, before your eyes flutter, lips parting to inhale. “Hey,” Cisco sits up, fingers tightening on your hand as his free reaches up, curling hair out of your face. “Hey, baby,”
“What happened?” Voice hoarse, you tilt your head down to look at the patch at your chest and shoulder, wincing at the pain your movement caused.
“Savitar,” Cisco murmurs, eyes flicking to his phone momentarily to send Caitlin a quick “she’s up!” “But you’re okay. We did it,”
“(D/N)?” Your head tilts in the opposite direction of your husband, Ciscos eyes following yours towards the resting toddler.
“She’s okay. We’re all okay,”
“Everything hurts,” You whimper, free hand rubbing at the patch, “My back. My chest. It hurts to breathe,”
“I know. I know,” Cisco stands up, reaching for the pain killers Caitlin ordered him to give you when you’ve awaken. He sinks down to sit at your legs, hand at your thigh as you take the cup of water he hands you to down the medicine. “Caits on her way to check your vitals to make sure everything’s stable. She’s taking good care of you,”
You nod, slightly, looking over when your daughter shifts in her playpen, whining as she sat up and spotted you, instantly standing to grasp the edge of the pen and reach up with a hand.
“Morning, sleeping beauty,” Cisco lightly jokes, leaving your side to move up to the playpen, lifting up the two year old before he moves back to you, setting down the toddler so she crawled up to you, giggling as you pull her into your lap,
“Easy, bug,” Cisco warns, glancing over just as Caitlin, along with Barry, Joe, and Iris entered the lab, all faces relieved to see you up.
“How long have you been up?” Caitlin asks, moving to the monitor beside you before checking your blood pressure, all while smiling at (D/N) leaning against your chest.
“Not even ten minutes,” You murmur, rubbing (D/N)s back, “How am I alive? All the outcomes from Savitar I died,”
“You had the best doctor in Central City taking care of you,” Joe smiles to Caitlin, who nods in thanks, your own eyes flicking to her with a smile.
“Thank you, Cait,” Your smile instantly vanishes with a loud hiss when (D/N) accidentally nudges your patched wound, Cisco immediately pulling (D/N) up by her underarms to pick her up,
“Okay, we gotta be easy with mama, babes,” Cisco reminds, shifting the now whining child to hold her better.
“I’ll be okay,” You press a hand to Ciscos torso, curling your fingers into his shirt, letting his eyes flick to your face.
Cisco nods, glancing down when (D/N) drops her head onto his shoulder. “I can take her,” Barry speaks, hands extended so (D/N) sat up and leaned towards her uncle, Cisco muttering his thanks as he moves back next to you.
“I’ll say you need to stay on bed rest for maybe about four more days before you can get up and move around,” Caitlin scans her monitor, then smiles, “Healing completely will take about four to six months, though. But you’ll be good as new,”
“Thanks, Caitlin,” You repeat, “Do I have to stay here or will I be able to go home?”
“I want to keep you here for a day or two to monitor your wound in case it opens again. But after that you’ll be free,” Caitlin jokes, your laugh heaved so you wince.
“This will most likely make you drowsy again,” Caitlin informs, as she sticks a needle in your arm, “But rest is what you need,”
“Barry and I can take (D/N) for tonight,” Iris speaks, Cisco glancing back at her, “You two need some peace and quiet while Y/N heals. Don’t worry,”
“Thanks, Iris,” You smile, the team slowly bidding their goodbyes as Cisco stands up to stretch, your eyes watching as your husband looked over the monitor himself, bottom lip between his teeth.
“Hey,” You reach out to take his hand closest to you, letting him turn his wrist to grasp your fingers as he glances at you, “Have you slept?”
“No, uh,” Cisco sighs, forcing himself away from the monitor to face you, completely, “I couldn’t bring myself to,”
You give his hand a small tug, Cisco forcing himself to sit at the empty space beside you, hand now at your thigh as he sighs.
“I want to call it,”
His eyes look up at you. Your brows are pinched, sitting up further so he could feel your breath and vice versa, “Wait, what?”
“I…” Cisco shakes his head, glancing to the side with a thick swallow, “I want to call it. I- we almost lost you tonight, Y/N,”
“But that doesn’t mean we should make an immediate decision to leave the team,”
“We made a deal when we got married- when we found out you were pregnant, that if something major happened that put either of our lives or our daughters, in danger,” Cisco pauses to intake a breath, “That we’d both agree to drop the superhero life and step back,”
“You love being on this team, Cisco,” You take his hand at your thigh, staring at him, worriedly, “I love being on this team. Shouldn’t we think about this after I’ve finished recovering?”
“Your safety is more important,” Cisco heaves, hands releasing yours to cup your face, “I’m not going to stay here if that just chances that (D/N) could loose her mom again,”
Your eyes find themselves flicking wildly between his, hands at his wrists, “You haven’t slept,” You murmur, “You’re scared after what happened. Just… please try to sleep and we can talk about this more later,”
Ciscos eyes drop shut. With a short exhale, he nods, pulling you forward so your lips press against his, searching for comfort he knows you both need. “Okay. Scoot over,”
March, 2019. Two years after destruction.
“Don’t you hate it?”
Cisco hums, peering sideways from the bathroom door to where you stood at the mirror in your bedroom, shorts and lace bra the only thing covering your figure,
Your eyes are casted downwards, hand hovering over the large scar that dragged from the top of your right shoulder, to the middle of your right breast. “The scar,” You murmur, fingers finally brushing the raised skin with a sigh. “Don’t you hate how it looks?”
“I hate how you got it,” Cisco states, now behind you where he ignores the matching scar on your back, hands at your waist with a light squeeze, “But you look beautiful as always, with or without it,”
Your eyes roll, back leaning against his chest so his arms fully wrap at your front, chin on your shoulder, “You’re only saying that because I’m your wife,”
“I’m saying that because I love you,” Cisco turns his head to press a kiss to your cheek, which you lean into, “Maybe you can get…a badass tattoo over it or something,”
You snort, raising the back of your hand to lightly smack his cheek, “In your dreams,”
May 14th, 2019. Two years after destruction.
“He took Cisco,”
“What do you mean he took him?” Your figure leans against the Cortex desk. Fingers grasping the countertop, you ignore the white numbness of your knuckles as your eyes flicked between screens,
“I don’t know, they went through a breach when I got here,”
“Cisco?” You call out, nearly holding your breath as you listened for your husbands response, “Baby, can you hear me?”
“I hear you!” Ciscos call back is muffled. “My breach frizzed out and threw us in a forest somewhere,”
“What kind of trees are there?” Sherloque asks, stepping next to you as you pinch your brows to him, “Ask him,”
“What?” You flick your eyes to the screen, eyes steady on Ciscos heart rate, “Cisco, what kind of trees are around you?”
“I don’t know!” You hear Cisco grunt, dodging most likely, “Pine trees? Some of them have pointy leaves,”
“Ash trees,” Sherloque hums, leaning forward, “Now, Fransico, I need you to hold your breath, let me listen,”
A pause. Crickets sound, Sherloque clicking his tongue, “Kolin Woods,”
“Are you sure?” Barry asks through, Sherloque humming, “I’m on my way,”
On time, Cisco yells out in pain through his mic that makes you sit down in the seat behind you, “Baby, you’ve got to run,”
“I can’t,” Cisco heaves, your hand over your jaw as your knee bounced, “He got me in the back of the shoulder-,”
Silence. Your watering eyes stare at the still monitor of his heart beat, sitting up so quick your mind spins, “Cisco?”
Nothing. “Cisco,” You demand, attempting to turn the volume of his ear piece up, “Baby, please. Barry what’s going on?!”
“He’s gone,”
Iris can see you nearly fall out of your chair. Her hand reaches to grasp your arm, sliding in her chair closer beside you. “He’s not here, he-,”
The silence they keep giving you feels deadly. A heavy sigh of relief, “He’s alive,”
Your chest caves as your hands cover your face, body slouching beside Iris as she exhales, relieved. “Both of you come back. Now,”
You don’t move from your chair until you hear their footsteps behind you. Barry held Ciscos arm around his shoulders, while Ciscos free hand pressed to his injury, face scrunched.
“Oh, my god,” You push from your chair, Barry releasing Cisco quick enough to let Cisco throw his free arm around your shoulders, lips to your hair as you pressed yourself against him.
Your hands reach up to his face, sniffling as he whispered reassuringly to you. “I’m okay,” His thumb brushes a free fallen tear from your jaw. “I’m okay,”
You nod, taking his arm to lead him into Caitlin’s lab, sitting beside him as Caitlin got to work.
. . .
“Hey,” Your eyes raise to your husband. Your vision is blurry- exhausted- as you stared at his arm in the sling, Caitlin’s order until his shoulder healed. “What’re you thinking about?”
You lift your head, nose stuffy as you inhale, “I think you were right,” You murmur, Ciscos brows pinching, “About calling it,”
His brows relax at this. He knew the minute something happened to him, you’d instantly change your mind.
“Hey,” Cisco repeats, extending his free hand- bandaged from Cicada first attack- waiting for you to rise from the chair and take it before gently tugging you to stand in front of him, “Is this what you really want?”
“I don’t know,” You exhale, lifting your chin to stare at the ceiling, “Maybe it’s the adrenaline of the fact that I thought you were dead-,”
“But I’m not,” Cisco soothes, “This is just Savitar all over again, I’m okay-,”
“We had a warning for mine, Cisco!” You hiccup, glancing over when realizing your voice had grown in volume. Looking back at him, Ciscos eyes flick between yours, worriedly, “We had a warning for me, not for you. I saw your heart beat stop on the monitor and I thought you died,”
“But I didn’t,” Ciscos hand slides to your jaw, “I’m here, and I’m breathing. We both are, baby,”
“I know,” You copy his action, swallowing, “I just don’t want this to be a scare again, it’s not healthy for a baby the team doesn’t know about,”
Ciscos eyes soften, tugging on your wrist with a soft c’mere before he lets you sit next to him, his free arm sliding to your shoulders to pull you against his side. “Do you really want this?”
“You’re the one who wanted it first,” You remind, hearing him exhale through his nose.
“I want this,” He murmurs, thumb pressing to your shoulder blade comfortingly, “I want you. You, and (D/N), and the baby safe, and that can’t happen if we stay,”
You nod, tilting your head back to look up at him, “Let’s take care of Cicada, at least,” Cisco nods, lips to your forehead before moving to your own lips.
May 26th, 2019. Two years after destruction.
“We have something we want to talk to you guys about,”
The team all look up from their spots spread across the Cortex. They train their attention on the couple sitting at the desk, Cisco distractingly staring at the computer screen while you were already looking at them.
“Okay,” Iris speaks first, hesitantly, “What is it?”
“Uh, well, two things,” Your eyebrows flick when Cisco looks at you, “Good news or bad news first?”
“There’s bad news?” Sherloque huffs, “Might as well say both at once, then,”
Cisco is the one who raises his brows this time. You shrug a shoulder, Barry’s brows pinching at your silent communication,
“Okay,” You exhale, shifting in your seat, “We’re leaving Team Flash,”
“Y/Ns pregnant,”
Six pairs of eyes all blink at you. You grimace, sighing as you stand up. “Im pregnant. Which is one of the reasons why we’ve decided,” You wipe your hands nervously on your sundress, “To leave the team,”
“I don’t know whether to hug you or cry,” Caitlin moves up first, your smile light as she embraces you, Cisco moving to stand, “When?”
“We’re officially stepping back in two weeks,” Cisco states, eyes shifting to your brother who had crossed his arms, “We’re moving in three months,”
“Wha- moving?” Your brothers eyes instantly look at you, “Leaving the team I understand, but you’re moving?”
“Central City isn’t safe, Barry,” You remind, brows pinched, “We’re going to have two kids under the age of three. We won’t be part of Team Flash anymore but we’re still a risk of danger. Leaving Central City is the best decision for them,”
“We’ll-we’ll protect you,” Your brother stammers, your shoulders deflating. After your parents death, you knew he felt as if he was losing you, too, “You don’t have to leave the city altogether,”
“As much faith I have in you guys, I just don’t want to chance it,” You breathe, “We’re doing this to protect these kids. Just support us on it, Bar,”
Your brother exhales, looking towards the rest of the team, “Have you told Joe?”
“Joes the one we talked to about the decision,” Cisco speaks, as you shift in your heels before settling on sitting back down in your chair, “So he’s known, for a while,”
“And you decide to tell us two weeks in advance,” Barry nods, Iris crossing her arms as her brows pinch towards her husband, “Thanks for the short notice. Got it,”
“Barry,” Iris hisses, the man speeding off so your hair blows in your face, your eyes shutting as you tuck the strands back behind your ear, “Y/N-,”
“I know, he’s just upset,” You sigh, twisting in your chair, “I knew we should’ve told him sooner,”
Ciscos hand presses to your shoulder, rubbing the area with a frown as he looks up to his team.
July 2019, two years after destruction.
“I think that’s the last of it,” Cisco hears your heaved huff from the living room, stepping around the corner to see you taping a box shut, standing with your hands on your hips,
“Besides (D/N) going to war with herself over which toys she wants to keep,” Cisco snorts, thumb jabbing over his shoulder where you hear your daughter talking to herself, then clanking of her toys,
“I don’t see why we can’t just let her keep them all,” You shrug, Ciscos eyebrows raising as his head shakes, hands on your hips,
“I’m not letting our daughter become a hoarder,” He states, “Besides, once Dante comes, that’ll be two times the toys,”
“I’m so glad this one’s a boy,” You sigh, breathlessly, head tilting up to look at your husband, “One girl, one boy. All I wanted,”
Cisco smiles, nose brushing yours, “Thank you for letting me name him after my brother,”
“You let me choose (D/N),” You smile back, “Only fair with the next one,”
Ciscos hands press to your stomach, lips brushing yours before a loud crash comes from your daughters room, Cisco jerking back to glance over his shoulder, where (D/N) now stood at the kitchens entrance, holding her toy Harry Potter wand now snapped in two,
Your daughters pout matches her tearful eyes, Cisco copying her pout as he moves up to her, lifting her so she sniffles and holds up the broken wand, “Daddy…”
“That’s okay,” Cisco murmurs, “We’ll use our magic glue to put it back together, it’ll make sure the wand doesn’t loose its magic, hm?”
(D/N) nods, fist rubbing her eye as you smile, taking the broken pieces before digging in an open box, thankful to find the super glue pretty easy. After putting the wand together and blowing the glue dry, you hand it back, causing her to giggle and wave it around.
“Have you figured out what toys you’re keeping, amor?” Cisco brushes her hair from her face, her hesitation causing you to laugh,
“I’ll take that as an shes keeping them all,” Cisco gives you a look, but rolls his eyes and smiles.
November 2020. three years after destruction.
“Hey guys!” Cecile’s smile when she opens the door is bright, opening it wider so you could step in, her hands out in a gimmie motion for the toddler in your arms,
“Your favorite has arrived,” You smile as Barry walks up, embracing you before turning to (D/N) at your leg, hands open so she reaches up and lets him pick her up,
“I think theyre more excited to see the kids rather than us,” Cisco speaks, setting down the large bag of presents he held behind the couch, laughing when Joe shakes his head and embraces you so tight you stutter on your breath,
“I’m excited to see you,” Joe states, you peeking your head out from his arm with a muffled “I can tell”, “We’ve missed you guys,”
“I’ve missed this little guy,” Cecile kisses Dante’s cheek so the near one year old giggles, your smile light as you watch your step-mother love on her grandson, “He’s gotten so big already!”
“(D/N)s starting to look too much like Cisco,” Iris hums, twirling a curl on (D/N)s cheek as Cisco fakes offense, accepting a small glass of wine from Caitlin,
“How’s Star City?” Wally asks you, as you settle on the couch while Cecile sits in the recliner, beginning to bounce Dante on her lap,
“It’s good,” You breathe, “Cisco and I both started our jobs, Felicity is loving being the babysitter,”
“How long are you guys staying for the holidays?”
“Uh, we’re hoping for a week,” You glance at Joe, “If that’s okay with you,”
“Stay as long as you need,” Joe raises his glass, gesturing to your two children, “As long as I get to spend time with my grandkids,”
“Oh, definitely,” Cisco slides an arm around your shoulders, pulling you into his side, “I know my parents want us to visit with them but the rest of the week- they’re yours,”
Joes lips part to say something, but the door knocks, your eyes scanning the group wondering just who could be missing-
“Sorry we’re late, guys!” A male calls, you looking over your shoulder to see a tall man with glasses next to a Latina girl, both holding presents, “We have gifts!”
“Oh, Y/N, Cisco, this is Chester and Allegra,” Caitlin gestures, Allegra smiling as she rounds the couch,
“I heard a lot about you,” Allegra speaks, raising a box, “And your kids. I hope it’s okay I bought your daughter something,”
“Yeah, that’s okay,” You smile, watching her kneel in front of your daughter to hand her the box, eyes then shifting to Chester,
“Y/N Allen, right?”
“Born an Allen, yes,” You cackle, “But legally I’m a Ramon,”
“You’re the one who miraculously survived a stab to the chest. You’re awesome!”
The air falls tense, quick, Ciscos hand tightening on your shoulder as you send a weak smile, “Thanks. It wouldn’t have ended the way it did if it wasn’t thanks to Caitlin,”
“How’d you know Savitar was the one who did it? No one could see him but Barry!”
“O-kay!” Joe cuts it, noticing Ciscos irritated stare, “Let’s open gifts, hm?”
Shoving the ball of wrapping paper into a trash bag, you huff as you tie the bag shut. “I didn’t make you uncomfortable back there, did I?” You look up at Chesters entrance, smile light as you shake your head,
“No, no. It’s just, um, that whole thing was a really emotional experience,”
“How so? Besides, uh, worrying about surviving,” Chester closes his eyes, brows pinched, before reopening them,
“Uh, Barry-,” You pause, “Do you know?”
“About Barry being the Flash? Yeah!” Chester laughs, “Allegra and I, we’re part of Team Flash,”
You smile, quickly dropping it, “Barry went back in time by accident, and saw the whole thing revolving Savitar and I. Yeah we had a heads up, but originally I wasn’t supposed to make it,”
Chester frowns as you sigh. “It was six painful months of waiting. Cisco and I, we were both terrified. My daughter was only maybe two at the time, and I was so scared of leaving her,” You lift a shoulder, setting the trash bag to the side, “It was a miracle Caitlin was able to save me. Here I am three years later, with now two kids and almost completely healed,”
“I’m sorry I asked,”
“No, really, it’s okay,” You laugh, moving to walk around him, “It feels good talking about it again. It was a lot, still is, but I’m healing,”
Chester smiles, nodding, looking down at his phone which beeps, along with five other phones across the house.
“Dammit,” Barry mutters, glancing at Iris who already stands, “Meta attack downtown,”
“Aw yeah!” Chuck grins, “I’m in,”
“One holiday,” You roll your eyes, dropping back beside Cisco before picking up Jenna from her rocker, “One holiday without a meta ruining it, is all I ask,”
“You guys go ahead, we’ll stay here,” Joe insists, nodding to Cecile who had her own fun holding your son,
“We’ll be back!” Chester grins, winking, “In a Flash,”
“Don’t say that,” Barry whines, “Because every time you do, we end up being stuck out there for hours,”
“I was trying to make a joke. Take the joke!”
“In case that happens,” Allegra smiles, waving,
“Happy holidays, everyone,”
89 notes · View notes
angstybluejay · 2 years
Text
Angsty BlueJay Masterlist
A=Angst, F= Fluff, <3 = Personal Fav
Links: Taglist, Etsy
Top Gun - requests open
Hangman
Call Me <3
Every Day <3
Importance A
Of Trust & Passion A
The Strength of a Pilot (pilot!reader) AF
The Great Fight A Part Two AF
Rooster
nothing yet
Bob
Goddess of Chaos - F
Stranger Things - requests closed
Eddie Munson
working on requests
Steve Harrington
nothing yet
DC - requests closed
Dick Grayson
nothing yet
Tim Drake
Worse than Death A
Fix This A
Jason Todd
nothing yet
Damian Wayne (aged up)
I Feel Things AF
Bruce Wayne
Date Night not my best work
Barry Allen
Klutz F
You Can Be a Queen, Change the Story, Today is the Day (3 part series completed) AAAAA
Not Needed (Savitar x Reader) A
Dying in Barry's Arms A
Harrison Wells
Breakdown (Harry Wells x Reader x Tony Stark) A
I'm done A
A Bad Feeling A (HR & Harry)
At Least You Were Happy A
Coming through the Breach
Earth 2 A
Team Flash
Undetected A
Just the Way You Are (Cisco x Reader)
Savitar Killing You A
Lives Were Saved & Lives Were Lost A
Other fics - requests closed
Clairvoyant Part Two (Zoom x Reader) Completed
Notes: REST OF MASTERLIST IS BEING COMPLETED!
91 notes · View notes
jokingmisfit · 2 years
Text
Arrowverse MasterList
Leonard Snart
~Coming Soon~
Mick Rory
~Coming Soon~
Poly Coldwave
~Coming Soon~
Harrison “Harry” Wells
~Coming Soon~
Eobard x Reader x Harry Wells
~Coming Soon~
Eowells
~Coming Soon~
Eobard Thawne
'First' Sights Part 1
'First' Sights Part 2
Yandere Abc's
Damien Darhk
Comforting Your Sorrows
Savitar
~Coming Soon~
Extras
~Coming Soon~
27 notes · View notes
shrinkthisviolet · 9 months
Note
Meta ask! Any oc, all the questions under the fandom section
Gonna answer these for Morgan:
What do you think the fandom for your character would be like? Are they a fan favorite, a love to hate villain, derided for whatever reason, or something else?
Fan favorite for those who like her, annoying for those who don’t
What feelings does your character most often instill in their fans? Affection? A desire to protect? Open lust? A love/hate dynamic? Why do you think their fans feel this way?
If I’m doing it right, affection and a desire to protect 😂
By contrast, what would their haters dislike about your character? Is it a petty complaint? A mischaracterization of the character or their intentions? Are they just a woman in a largely male-centric series?
Well, she is a woman in a largely male-centric series, but I think a lot of her haters wouldn’t like how close she and Barry are…and especially the fact that she does contribute to some significant plot points!
What controversies/drama would your character incite in fandom?
She gets in quite a few fights with Barry 😂 so that, for starters. Then there’s the fact that some people probably wouldn’t like how involved she is with the Team Flash stuff…even though it makes sense considering whose daughter she is (and even after s1, she’s still a valid member of their Team), and she’s still fairly sidelined—as much as she’s the main character of my AU, she’s still a side character in the grand scheme of things, and I do try to respect that!
What fan-material would exist for your character in fandom?
Hmm…probably fanfics. Possibly fanart too. Possibly gifsets of scenes she's in (to be honest, I think she'd get the same type of content as Jesse, possibly slightly more in amount due to being more prevalent)
Is your character the subject of ‘imagines’ or ‘x reader’ style blogs?
Probably, those blogs will truly use any character 😂 but hopefully they either age her up if the reader is an adult, or make the reader a teenager. AND make it a QPR, since she's aroace!
Are there any tropes fandom would put upon your character, for better or for worse?
Someone would write a fic of her being a speedster 😂 and/or a villain. And I, of course, would eagerly devour either of those (I made a speedster villain concept for her here a while ago!)
What would be the ‘incorrect but wildly popular’ interpretation of your character in fandom?
They’d infantilize her to no end, I just know it...and to be fair, she is the youngest member of the Team, but that doesn’t make her any less perceptive! After all, she’s the one who suspects Jay/Hunter first, the one he sees fit to threaten to keep her quiet (which implies he sees her as some kind of threat, otherwise why bother).
She’s also the one who takes Harry to task first, she’s the one stands up for herself numerous times in s1 and s2…and in s3, her extending trust to Savitar could be seen as naïve, but…it’s based on lived experience with Barry. It’s no more naïve than Iris’s compassion for Savitar.
What corners of fandom would consider your character blorbo material?
I guess the corners that love Wells family stuff? 😂 especially the ones that like her being Barry’s sister. Though idk how many “corners” the Arrowverse Flash fandom has tbh
oc ask game!
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codysreigns · 3 years
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Tumblr media
THE ONLY TIME I WILL SAY I AM SUBMISSIVE AND BREEDABLE IS FOR HIM. FOR HIM
266 notes · View notes
chloe-skywalker · 3 years
Text
Don’t Kill Anymore - Savitar Barry
Savitar x fem!reader
Warnings: none
Word count: 372
Requested: Can you do a reader x Savitar Barry where he comes to visit the team after Hr death and the reader is able to convince him not to kill and that she will always be there for him and Savitar tells about how he has feelings for her. - @raveenasblog​
Authors Note: Might have tweaked it a bit by accident. I’m sorry. But thank you for requesting. Hope you enjoy it.
Masterlist
Arrow-Verse Masterlist
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“He’s here.” Caitlin mumbled watching the computer screens.
“Why now? Why do we really have to deal with him right now?” Cisco groaned in annoyance.
“I’ll go talk to him.” Y/n spoke up, pushing out her chair to get up.
“Y/n, you don’t have-” Barry started but Y/n cut him off with a gentle but tight smile.
“It’s fine. I’ll be back.” Y/n shook her head before leaving the room. She knew no one else would go talk to him, so it would be pointless to let them bicker.
“What are you doing here?” Y/n asked as she stepped outside, approaching the man of the hour.
“I came to talk.” Savitar shrugged putting his hands into his pockets.
“More like kill.” she mumbled looking down.
“Y/n I can explain.” he moved towards her with obvious concern being shown in his body langue and facial expression.
“I don’t want you to.” Y/n’s voice cracked as she moved her arms out to the side. Hands in the pockets of her jacket. It was freezing outside so she was hoping that this wouldn’t be to long.
“Then what do you want me to do? I can tell what I did is bothering you. How do I make it up to you?” Savitar pleaded, standing as close to her as he could. Looking directly in her eyes. Y/n could tell he really wanted to fix their relationship. But there was only one thing that could.
“Stop killing.” Y/n stated with a look that ment she was not gonna budge on the subject. 
“What?” he asked with a shocked and confused look on his face.
“You heard me.” Y/n spoke not changing her face at all.
“Y/n-”
She put her hand up to stop him before he could say more. “No, you want to do better? You want to make it up to me?” Savitar nodded, he was desperate. Once he did that Y/n stated again. “Stop killing.”
“Ok. But… Will you help me? Be better.” Savitar agreed. Anything to keep her at his side.
“Of course.”Y/n smiled, nodding in agreement that she would help him. Help him stop killing and be better.
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austarus · 3 years
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Fic Masterlist (06/16/22)
Hello my lovelies, welcome to my blog and thank you for reading my content. Don’t forget to show me support by hitting that reblog button and commenting. It boosts my moral when I know my stuffs going around for others to see and enjoy. You can also find my fics in Ao3 under the same username ‘3′
Keep in mind, the further you go down the list for one character, the older the fic gets so it’s not going to be as well written out or fully developed as my newer work. Trust me I kept cringing and reprimanding myself that I could have done better.  Like I want to throw myself out a window. To be honest, I’m still learning with each time I write, I get better bit by bit. But my old stuff’s shit, I won’t lie. 
Harrison Wells (Eobard Thawne) x Reader x Harry Wells: Six Crows
Harrison Wells (Eobard Thawne):
Chain Of Events
Escape From ARGUS
The Downfall Of The Reverse Flash: Part 1    Part 2    Part 3
The Consequences Of Our Actions
A Single Broken Soul
Birds of a Feather
Ballistic Confrontations:  Part 1   Part 2    Part 3
Integrated Revelations:  Part 1    Part 2    Part 3
Sudden Cognizance (Demon Soulmate AU)
Hidden Among The Sheep (Demon Soulmate AU)
Glowing Warmth (Demon Soulmate AU)
Dating (Headcanon)
Right and Wrong
Irresistibly Pink
Deal With The Devil (Demon Soulmate AU)
Worth It
Goodness Gracious
Winter/Christmas (Headcanon)
Big Bad Man
Time and Change
Red With Passion
Darkness Within
Snowman
Sweet Seduction
Green With Envy
Time Vault
Monster
Powers
Harry Wells:
Period Gossips
Crisis of Infinite Wells:  Part 1    Part 2    Part 3    Part 4    Part 5
Amending Past Actions
Return of The Crisis
Primrose Path (Series on AO3)
Decisions and Impulses
Bulletproof In The Shower
Christmas Party (Headcanon)
Mellow Out
Hold Me Please
Couples Therapy (Headcanon)
Sweet Tooth (SMUT)
Coffee Maybe?
Smiley Faces and Naptime
“Rich” Imagination (Headcanon)   Part 1    Part 2 (SMUT)
Wedding Day
Oh, It’s On Now
Truth Be Told   Part 1    Part 2
Bite Me
Baby (Headcanon)
Winter/Christmas (Headcanon)
Good News
Trying to Propose   Part 1    Part 2
Body Heat
Height Difference
Motivation
Cold Hands
Good Man
Darkest Deed
Light In Darkness
Possessive
Jealous
Pulse Rifle
Dark Instinct
Stolen Clothes
Sleep
Hershey Kisses
Sugar Rush
Dress Up
A Distraction
Sneaking Off
HR Wells:
Reversal of Denouement
Scars Across Time 
The Mermaid and The Pirate Gentleman (Headcanon)
Hidden Among The Fairy Lights:  Part 1    Part 2    Part 3
Exclusively Magical
Waking Up Papa Bear
Just An Average Day
Broken Dream
Anonymously Written
Crack Of Dawn
Color Flood (Soulmate AU)
Drink Of Choice
Christmas Party (Headcanon)
Dream (SMUT)
Tiny Baby
Morning Luck
My Sunshine
Broken But Loved
The Friendly Ghost
Baby (Headcanon)
Winter/Christmas (Headcanon)
Squats For Jesus
Movie Night Cuddles
Pure, Love
Coffee
Useful Somehow
Adorable
Sherloque Wells:
Thorned Cage: Part 1   Part 2   Part 3
Down and Under
Sick Jealousy
On Thin Ice With Affection
Nash Wells:
Prodigal Son:  Part 1   Part 2   Part 3   Part 4
Squandered Altruism
The Beguilement of Barry Allen
OG Harrison Wells/Timeless Wells:
White King, Black Queen
Savitar (Barry Allen):
Acceptance and Change
Falling Out Fast
Fussy Child
Me and You Against Them   Part 1    Part 2
A Gift From Me To You
Barry Allen:
A Berry For Barry
A Snowball’s Chance In Hell
Comfort After Breakup (Headcanon)
The Nutcracker (AU)
Ouch
Caitlin Snow & Killer Frost:
FWB (Headcanon)
Fair Game (Smut)
5 and 7
Snowflake (Platonic)
Team Flash:
Beach Day (Headcanon)
Being a Member of Team Flash (Headcanon)
Heart To Heart
Jokes On You
In The Air, On The Inside
Snowball Fight
College/University (Headcanon)
Pokemon Challenge
Wells Boys x Reader (Some are Polyamorous) :
May The Best Wells Win
Diamond
Cornered
Reward
Protection
Mutual Agreement
Training
Beat Up
Innocence
Don’t Give Up
You’re Not Monsters
Possessive Love
Timeline Disaster
Nicknames
375 notes · View notes
emptytypewriter · 4 years
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i’m feeling so uninspired - someone send me their favourites fics so i can check them out and hopefully get some inspiration.
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underworldsheiress · 4 years
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Hey someone remembers that moment when Barry erases his own memory to stop Savitar? But then things got weirder then they expected.
So I want a fanfic where a female reader grow up with Barry and Iris. Barry in love with Iris and reader in love with Barry.
She is working with Cisco and Caitlin at S.T.A.R. labs and she is finally getting over Barry, specifically now that he is planning on marrying Iris.
But Barry loses his memory and start acting like Bart, so he doesn't remember Iris and falls for reader. And it gets even weirder than already is.
Maybe is memory is back and he realises he always like reader and she turns into Savitar target or something.
Can someone please write this down? Please. I already requested it long ago but the person never posted. Why???
Sorry Iris, it is just I love drama and plottwists.
180 notes · View notes
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Man Down ~ B.A.
A/n: I haven’t watched the show in a long enough time that I forgot all the crisis events and I don’t want to go back and watch any of them soooo I just made it Savitar era centered. Hints of Savitar x reader like. Everywhere. Sorry about that lol
Request: “...Barry x male reader, reader gets hurt trying to protect Barry during a crisis event?” By anon
Word Count: 5200+
MASTERLIST
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When Caitlyn sat down next to me, we both knew it was too late, but I admired her for trying anyway. Even before she spoke, I knew what she was going to say. I could tell in the way her lips curved into a frown and her wide eyes begged, but her words had no energy to them, that she knew it too. That she recognized the way I was acting. That she saw through my calm and comforting and reassurance. My hopelessness underneath, mourning so much more than Iris West’s death.
Mourning my own.
It had been months of fighting back Savitar. So long trying to save Iris’ life. To change the future. They’d made some progress here and there, but…. Ultimately not enough. It was obvious that Barry wouldn’t be able to stop it. Wouldn’t be able to save her. And Barry Allen couldn’t live without Iris West.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn’t do everything in my power to keep them together?
A different back and forth had been happening, other than the battle of wills between Barry and his time duplicate. A battle of love. For years, I’d longed for Barry to stop looking at his best friend and to pay attention to me. To level those adoring eyes and loving gazed onto me instead of her. He never did. Sometimes I thought he might, almost like he was considering it. Just like the days that Iris almost paid attention to Barry. Almost saw him as something other than a brother, as she had decided he was. Almost.
Almost only counted in horseshoes and hand grenades, as the song goes. So I’d decided that if it came down to it - me or her - Barry would chose her. He already had, and he would again. He would be mad at me for doing this. He would be so, so angry. But he’d get over it eventually. He’d move on and reconcile. They’d fall in love one day. There was a newspaper by line proving it. He would be happy with her. One day his almost would turn into an absolute. He might not forget his friend, who had once been, but he would be happier in the end if this was me instead of her.
So I would die instead.
“Please don’t do it.”
I smiled when Caitlyn finally spoke. It was a lie when I smiled, when I looked at her with confusion. “Do what?”
Her gaze bore into mine. “I don’t know.” There was already mourning in her tone. Oh Caitlyn… poor Caitlyn. How much had she lost? How many? My one regret - I could t spare my other friends from my loss. “I don’t know what you’re planning, but you’ve been acting different. And it’s worrying me.”
I looked away, face scrunched as I worked on the design Cisco had asked me to work on. He had a new suit idea for the future, and being more gifted with a needle than him, I was usually the one he went to. I hoped to finish it before it was too late. Now it was an easy thing to focus on. To play casual with. “You worry too much Caitlyn.” A boldfaced lie. We all knew she worried exactly as much as she should. All her friends were suicidally wreckless. “I have no plans.” Another lie. I looked up at her, smiling again. “I’m worried about Iris too, but I know Barry will pull through. He always does.” I winked, nudging her. Too many lied for what was probably our last person to person conversation. “I promise, okay?”
She didn’t respond to that. She looked at the suit I was making. Like it was proof. And it was, in a way. Hadn’t I not been working on it this whole time? Hadn’t I said it would take me a while? Hadn’t I told Cisco it would be a while, with the little details I had to work out and all the stress around us? Too much stress, too much to do, not enough time to handle it all.
The fact that I was making time for this - I might have yelled it was my final act at the top of my lungs. Not that I had to, for the people that could see the unspoken words in the way I said goodbye and the words I didn’t say and the things I did or didn’t do. Not for people like Caitlyn. She would have always ended up here, unable to stop me but desperate to try, knowing I would do anything to save Barry from the agony he was facing. Knowing that I loved him enough to destroy myself.
Her best of all, who had seen it in her fiancé’s face the day he had promised to see her again, knowing he was doomed to die. Of Caitlyn. Poor, brilliant, amazing, wonderful Caitlyn. If only I could spare you from reliving this again…
I looked away, back toward my sewing. She didn’t believe me, we both knew it. But there was nothing else to be said. So we didn’t speak again, sitting in the last silence we’d get together. Too few days now until Iris was supposed to die. Until I would take her place instead.
-
“You know, it’s weird.” I looked up when Savatar spoke to me, no longer startled at the way he simply appeared in my room. He had been doing this since the day he had been exposed for who he was. The first time it had been terrifying, but it had soon become clear as to why he did it anyway, and over time I had gotten used to it.
“What’s weird?” I asked calmly, returning to my sewing. “The fact that you keep breaking into your future partner’s bedroom before even meeting in your own proper timeline, or the fact that I’m seeing a suit you don’t recognize?”
Savitar fought a smile. He was doom and gloom unless he was around me. Apparently in the future we fell in love or whatever. I couldn’t imagine knowing what I know now, and still falling in love with him. Knowing what he would do. Who he would become. How he would destroy the man I love now. Apparently, the future was a wild place. Or… would have been. How it’ll never have happened. Not for me and not for hun.
Perhaps we were soulmates after all.
“I knew I shouldn’t have reacted to that suit you’re making. Spoilers.”
I snorted, unable to handle the hilarity in a time duplicate coming backward in time to kill someone just to ensure his own existence, using Barry’s memories to put himself on top the whole time. He was a walking spoiler. His backstory alone was the most raw look into what was supposed to happen yet.
“So not the suit then,” I decided on, looping back to his original comment. “What’s weird?” I looked up at him briefly before returning to my work. I couldn’t help the tender spot I had for him. He was a darker, sadder Barry. All the same memories and expressions and body language but with more pain than even my Barry had. It was in my very blood and bones to want to cheer him up. To want to make it better. That I did understand. I knew that a future me would have carried that softness and kindness toward him. He had mention that was how he had fallen in love with me - the one who treated him like a person, who recognized and cared for him.
Perhaps that was how I managed to fall in love with him as well. The way that he was Barry enough to count, but different enough that it wasn’t bitter. Wasn’t overwhelming. Different enough that he wasn’t obsessed with Iris. We probably would have been happy.
Savitar watched me, as if studying me. “I love watching your mind work. All the things you never say that simply click together in your mind.” He swallowed, and I knew he was thinking about how much he missed me. Future me, who loved him without guilt. I wonder if he visited the older me when he wasn’t actively spending time taunting Barry and making plans to kill Iris. I wonder if future me knew where he was, what he was doing.
I sighed. He was right, I really did have too many thoughts to speak them out loud so rarely. He really did know me like no one else did. It was jarring. “You didn’t answer my question. What’s weird?”
His smile finally won out. It edged on a smirk, but was a little too soft around the edges while he looked at me. He looked so much less intimidating like this. So much more like Barry. “To see it happen like this. To see the seeds planted of our future even before we existed in the same way. To know you so deeply, when you don’t know me at all, knowing that later you’ll know me as deeply and I will be the one who’s surprised by it.” He sat down at the table across from me, studying my face. “I always wondered what it was like to go into a relationship knowing someone, hearing stories, being aware of the steps even before they happen. When I opened my eyes the first time and you smiled at me. When I realized that you were different, and I found out that you knew me all this time ago. I wondered if you started falling in love with me before I was created. I wondered if my coming back in time was an influence for you, as you being so familiar and comfortable with me so quickly was an influence for me. I had this idea in my mind that we were this never ending cycle. That we ended up together simply because we already knew we would end up together.”
My smile grew dry. “Time travel is a weird one,” I agreed. “And I can imagine what you mean. But… no. I don’t know when my future self fell in love with you, but it wasn’t now. It isn’t now for me at least. Maybe now that the future has changed it’ll be different.” I shrugged, not looking up. Thinking about how I would die, driven by my love for Barry. About how I would never get the chance to fall in love with Savitar to begin with.
His eyes narrowed. He leaned forward, catching my wrist. I looked up at him - and I saw it in his eyes. I saw the understanding and the accusation. I saw the rage there, as I’d seen it in Caitlyn. The mourning turning quickly to denial. To refusal. He saw my resolve, my plan, even though he couldn’t understand what it was or how I had come up with it. Why I had.
“What are you planning?” He demanded.
I met his eyes evenly, deflating a bit. It was harder to lie to this man. Not just because of his face, or his voice. Not just because he was so like Barry that he had a hold on me from day one. Now he was his own man, esperare from Barry, and he still had a hold on me. A part of me perhaps already did care for him. Perhaps that was the part that would have loved him one day. If we’d had the chance.
“I don’t have a plan.” My voice was even and unrelenting. His eyes flared with anger for a moment, and it seemed that he might lash out. But I was special to him. He didn’t know Iris, and he specifically hated Barry. Everyone else was lost to him. Strangers who estranged themselves. Who shut him out first. But me? I was supposed to be the love of his life. He couldn’t be the monster he became so easily around the others. The violence he didn’t struggle to harness for them was impossible with me. We both knew it. He melted, slowly at first but then very suddenly all at once. He fell from his chair, moving around the table at super speed to kneel in front of me. He turned my chair so that he could move close to me. His hands rested on my wrists, and he held my gaze. There was a deep desperation there. Pleading. Very like the look that Caitlyn had given me. “I don’t have your memories. I don’t remember what you did, or do, or how you change through time. I… I can only beg. I will do anything for you, just please let it happen.”
My frown twisted into almost a snarl. Almost. I couldn’t quite bring true bitterness to use against him either, as he could not summon violence against me. We were trapped in our love for each other. In our softness, at the very least. “Why would I do anything you asked me to?”
He searched my eyes, and then sighed with relief when he found it. Found the part of me still fighting to survive. He recognized that I hadn’t completely given up. Completely committed myself to death. What sentient creature didn’t have survival reflexes that fought to extend those last moments? Who didn’t cling to life, even when death was inevitable?
He saw that part of me that fought and he sought to encourage it. “You find love after him. You’re so happy with me. We get married in the place from your dream board. Every dream you had comes true. You have a whole life, Y/n. You have eternity. It feels like eternity for us. It feels like forever. Where I’m from, it’s only been a few years, but I’ve been to the future. I’m a hero because of you. I take Barry’s place. That horrible world that he created for a while, when he leaves everyone behind - I fill it. You help me. We become the new team Flash. It’s… it’s different,” and it’s a plea when he says it. A desperate sell to get me to see the future he does. To want it. To believe in it. To fight for it. Or, more accurately, to not fight because of it. To give up and let it all happen. “But it’s ours. He never loves you. He never will. But I will. I see what he doesn’t. What he won’t. And we’re so much happier than they ever could have been. We’re worth it. We’re worth this.”
I can’t help myself. Even for Savatar, who I want to hate, who I’m going to destroy, I can’t bring myself not to want to reassure him. As I reassured Caitlyn last time, and have reassured Harry and Cisco and Barry and Iris and even Joe. I lean close, and I press a kiss to his forehead. His eyes flutter close and he leans into me, hands loosening their death grip as he melts into the affection. The first time I have showed it to him, as I am. A sign that I am capable of becoming the person who loves him. A beacon of hope I’m sure. I kiss him and I hold him when he leans into me and I close my eyes and, worst of all, I lie to him. “I won’t do it. I won’t do anything. I want that future with you. I want to be happy. I want to be loved. I want to be with you.” And it isn’t a complete lie. There are truths there that ring in my voice, making it warmer and filling it with light and hope and joy.
Half lies are so much easier to believe.
And he does believe them.
Savitar leans away from me, a hand rising to push hair behind my ear as he looks into my gaze and sees tears. “Can I kiss you?” He asked this question only once, always seeking out how much affection he’s allowed to show me. Until now, I couldn’t face something like that. The betrayal to Barry that it would be. We barely got to hugging until tonight.
But tonight… I’m going to die for Barry. I’m going to give him the ultimate sacrifice for his happiness. I can be a little selfish. Take a small betrayal for myself.
“Yes,” I whisper. Savitar doesn’t wait to be told again - he just kisses me. He has been waiting for this and I can tell. I’ve been waiting for it too, and that takes me by surprise. This weird in between, where kissing him is the daydream of kissing Barry that I have king craved, but also something completely new and separate and not about Barry at all. The part of me that will always love Barry meets the part of me that finds it easier and easier to love Savitar and I finally understand. They are the same part. I never moved on from Barry to love Savitar. It was new and also the same. Me getting everything I ever wanted and also something completely different. Me holding onto what I’ve been holding onto since day one, but also letting it go too. I didn’t move on from Barry - it was like dating his brother or his best friend. It was unfair to Savitar and even more unfair to me.
This darker me with these far more selfish desires…. It was sickening to think about. How could I have done this?
Now it was clearer than ever that I was going to go with the plan I’d picked. I was sure. I wouldn’t become the person Savitar knew me as. I wouldn’t let that version of me win. Not this time. Not ever.
-
The device wrapped around my wrist, disguised as a bracelet, had a wire attached that ran underneath my long sleeve, up my arm to the power source on my chest. The full body machine had been beautifully effective in making me not only look like Iris West, but being one hundred convincing in proving that I was her. I could smell her perfume, reach up and almost feel the curl on her hair. I would die as Iris West and no one would have time to recognize me, let alone stop me. They’d only have time to mourn me. And with Savatar’s defeat following so close after my own, I doubted they’d have the capacity to do anything other than celebrate.
Just as they always did. Take a moment and then let it go. Continue to be happy and successful, as the friends we’d lost along the way would want. And that was true, I did want them to be happy. I only wished I could have seen it.
Savatar had me in his grip, and I flinched as he gripped me a little too tightly. There was no softness now. No tenderness spared for the person he loved. I was Iris to him now. He wouldn’t realize he had killed the person most precious to him until it was too late.
I felt bad for him. It felt terrible that I was making him do this. That he was choosing to do it. That, perhaps, the forces of the universes drove him to be in such a position that we were all partially guilty. For treating him poorly. For having to kill Iris to survive. To choose between the woman he loved once, and the person he would come to love after. To chose between the man he had once been and the man he was made into after he wasn’t that man anymore. After he stopped being Barry and everyone turned on him.
My eyes closed when his fingers wrapped around my throat, my head tilting back as I felt the sun on my face for the last time.
Barry screamed.
Someone else screamed even louder.
My eyes flew open, recognizing Iris’s voice. She had her blazer opened, revealing the device on her chest. The one I had out there to turn her into me. To make her look like me so that she could hide until it was all over. So she could live.
What in the holy hell was she doing now?
Whatever it was, whatever play she had been trying to make at the last moment to save my life, it had been too late. Savatar flicked his wrist, gripping hard as he began to speed up, letting the speed force take him. He soon slammed to a halt as he processed that Iris was standing so far from him when she was supposed to be in his grip. That she was in two places at once.
Unfortunately for me, he had moved, and in shock he had loosened his grip. Barry didn’t have super strength, neither did Savatar. I ripped from him, going flying as my body rag dolled. I slammed into something solid. A tree? A wall? I couldn’t quite tell, my vision was blurry and spotted and for a second I couldn’t breathe. Everything spun and I was stunned - frozen in a moment of free fall and terror. Iris was supposed to have been zipped away, neck snapped and eyes dead to the world. Everything had gone wrong…
And then it went even worse.
The pain came all at once as my moment frozen in time ended. The agony of my burning body as I groaned while trying to scream. I realized immediately that my leg was broken and there was something wrong with my chest. Maybe a rib broken as well? Definitely a concussion. I blinked my eyes and saw blood around my face. Oh… I had hit something very hard indeed. Several broken things and a head wound. I was horribly injured, but perhaps not mortally.
Savitar was above me, tears streaming down his face. “Why?” He was asking, over and over again. Trying to understand. Failing to do so. I realized that in the process of my injury, the machine hiding who I was had broken. I was exposed as myself now, and all his softness was back. No betrayal. No anger. Just loss. Only mourning.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered. And I realized that I had said it every single time he had asked me. A mantra of my own to match his.
He had lost the chance to kill Iris. In running to my side, the time had passed and as he looked down at me we both knew it. Love had won out in the end. But not our love. His love for me maybe, but my love for Barry. Barry’s love for Iris. A cycle of unrequited, unreturned devotion. An unending string of broken hearts.
As the pain took over and I went unconscious, I saw his skin begin to fade away, turning into waves of light and energy. He unwound and spun off into the breeze, and he cried for me and I cried for him and we watched the other fade away as our friends watched the two of us, unsure if or even how to help.
The last thing I saw was him, still asking why, me still answering in echoing apologies, and my friends still watching in horror.
-
I woke up in the infirmary bed that Barry had laid in, in a coma a few years ago now. I woke up to see him sitting in a chair next to me, as I’d sat in a chair next to him. I had been apart of the team building the particle accelerator. I had been a designer. An engineer. I put metal and fabric together with the same fingers, the same methods. Back then I hadn’t been here for the day it all went wrong. I’d moved onto another project, one I’d be kicked from when my name got dragged through the mud and my credibility was demolished. Caitlyn, Wells, and Cisco had welcomed me back with open arms, and though I couldn’t do much in studying Barry, I was a good comfort. Even with him unconscious I’d found myself falling for him in the stories that were told and the things people shared with him while unconscious to get him to respond. To get him to come back. I admired hun through their eyes, and felt their love until he one day was awake and had become my friend and I got to love him in a way that was all my own.
Now it was a bit startling to see him next to me, hand holding mine and completely unconscious. Just as he had found me the first day he had woken up. Dutiful and beside him like a guardian. A watcher, waiting for him to wake him as he waited for me now.
“Barry?” I went to pull my hand away and he stirred immediately, desperately holding onto me as he lifted his head, blinking bleary eyes heavy with sleep. He looked around the room, obviously not expecting the interruption to have come from me. How many times had the others had to drag him from this room? Oh god why did that make my heart do somersaults?
When he realized I was awake he light up. Still tired but far more alert, as it super charged by seeing me awake and seemingly better. I hurt but I could muster a smile and that seemed to be enough. He whispered my name, pressing his lips to my knuckles. “You’re awake,” he mumbled dreamily. Like it was the most important news he had ever gotten.
I couldn’t help it. I blushed. “Yes. I am.”
He chuckled and I watched him as he wiped sleep from his eyes. “Sorry,” he apologized. “Didn’t mean to fall asleep. I’ve been doing that a lot, here, in this chair. Gotta be bad for my back.” He tilted his head in an attempt to pop his neck, but didn’t let go of my hand.
“Barry,” I began slowly, eyes narrowing as I tried to make sense of what was happening in front of me. “I’m lost.”
He smiled, as if I had done something rather adorable. These were one of those almost-maybe moments where I thought he might have loved me if things were different. It took me by surprise now, lasting longer than it usually did. His tender admiration didn’t fade or switch out or get embarrassed or distracted and flee. He turned his full attention toward me without hesitation. “I can imagine how… disorienting it would be. To almost die trying to save Iris for me, only to wake up and… it’s all different now.”
I quirked an eyebrow. “Different how?”
He grew quiet for a moment, holding my hand and letting his thumb run back and forth across my skin. When he spoke, I found that I hadn’t been breathing the whole time. It was too much but I didn’t dare stop him. I didn’t dare stop him. “When I realized it had been you the whole time. That all this time, I had been watching you die. Not Iris. Or, maybe Iris, but that this time it was you. That somewhere maybe it changed. I saw something else too. I saw her guilt, and found out how long she’d known what you were doing. She didn’t even come that day - Harry did. Disguised as Iris to save you, willing to sacrifice his life for yours. Both of you so brave and amazing. And… I can’t imagine what it would be like to know you were going to die and then seeing an alternative. But, I understood you more than I did her after that. You get me in a way she never will. I sacrifice myself for people too. That’s what being a hero is about. And I am a hero to some people. I try to be a hero as much as I can be. I want to be a person who stands with pride. Not with guilt. And… it made me love you even more. It made me realize that I’ve had these feelings for you for a while.”
I blinked. “That’s impossible.”
Barry laughed, once, startled by my reaction. “You’d have thought. I was sick over Iris…” he shook his head. “But I realized, it was obsession more than love. I was fixated on her. I couldn’t have any other relationships, couldn’t even entertain them. I was trapped by this idea of destiny. The newspaper and Earth 2 and Eobard Thawne and Eddie dying. It was like we had this great destiny. Like I had to be with her. I was expected to be. It was all leading to this. And I realized that a part of it was that it felt useless to try anything else. My future had already been decided. And part of it was that it felt like a prize. For being a hero, and for being patient. For waiting for her. It felt like a reward.” He scowled. “And I realized that’s a super toxic mentality to have. Iris isn’t s prize, or a reward - she’s a person. And I kept treating her like she was only going to be happy if she was with me. That we were two halves of a whole. But she’s a whole person by herself, and she’s capable and worthy of happiness on her own.” He shrugged. “Between that and my love for you, surging in this moment… I just felt like an idiot. I’d spent so much time wasted on a relationship I’d already failed by feeling like I was owed something. I’m not, and it’s different with you. Freer. This happened naturally, and despite everything else. Against all odds. It was given to me, I worked for it. No destiny, no predetermination. Just you and me. No god or fate involved. And I like it better this way.”
My heart surged, and my eyes went wide. “Barry Allen, did you just say you’re in love with me?”
He laughed, this time for a while, and he kissed my hand again. “That was.. a lot, all at once.” He sighed, grabbing my hands between both of his. “I’m sorry, let’s start with something more simple. How are you feeling?”
I couldn’t help but grin. “Wonderful.”
He beamed back. “Perfect. Can I kiss you?”
It felt like a dream as I whispered, “Yes.” He kissed me and I thought about when I had kissed Savitar. We had both dodged relationships that were bad for us. He had been obsessed with Iris his entire life, eternally pining and blinded, treating her like so much less than a person. And I had done the same with Savitar. Iris had been an idea to him, as Savitar was a missed opportunity I had seized in a new and different way.
How much better that we lived in the timeline where s’more genuine love won out. That we chose each other and got to be our best selves, instead of pushing for relationships that we wanted no matter the cost. No matter protest or person. This… this was freer. More innocent. Kinder.
“I love you,” I whispered, and I felt no guilt. Only joy. I imagine that the other me must have felt a lot of guilt. But not this me. Not this time. Finally I was free of that.
“I love you too,” he whispered back, and I heard it in his voice too. The freedom. The joy. The love.
How wonderful was that?
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Male Readers: @ravenpuff-oli @sortzz @fadedver
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