My last post about Byron got some discussion about how he stabbed himself with the pen, and whether we’re meant to take that as self-harm or punishing Tristan. I got reminded of this part of the compromise discussion:
Tristan considers how he felt about Byron spending so much time with Moonsong, and reflexively reaches out to where he felt Byron stab his leg. No matter what he says about the matter, I think he sees the long conversation with Moonsong as Byron punishing him, in the same way the pen-stabbing could be seen that way.
Tristan says he doesn’t care about what Moonsong says about him, but that seems like a pretty obvious lie. I don’t think you could avoid being upset if you were forced to watch as your brother and your teammate bond over how much they hate your guts, and then after said teammates casually admits to being incredibly homophobic, watch your brother stay with her for another several hours. Knowing you were there listening the whole time.
I've been thinking about how Tristan responded when he got control back in the morning:
Byron takes this all to mean Tristan can't stand listening to Byron. After all, Tristan is spending all the time complaining about the conversation, and not about Moonsong's homophobia. But wouldn't you expect him to be a bit upset about that? Isn't him not bringing it up at all, stumbling over himself trying to express indignation at anything besides Moonsong's homophobia, not incredibly revealing? Byron seems to be assuming that Tristan is being truthful when he says "she can say whatever she wants about me," but we know he's more sensitive about that he want's people to think. Byron knows too, considering how he earlier weaponized it:
His brother shouting slurs at him was the first thing to put him on the argumentative backfoot in that fight. Byron brings up how Tristan called him a pussy after he told others not to call him a sissy—regardless of how that's a dick move, does he not realize Tristan was desperately trying to escape being the bullied school queer, trying to avoid showing that the insults got to him and positioning himself as one of the guys? Trying to force the words to be friendly ribbing instead of taunting jeers?
So how would he talk about the experience of his brother choosing to spend two hours with a girl who just admitted to despising him for being openly gay, desperately wanting to get away from all of it while forced to stay and listen— and for what? What could justify his brother sitting there despite everything and making him take it? He wouldn't fucking say why it drove him crazy. He would talk around it, complain about how boring it was— because why was his brother staying there despite what Moonsong said if they were going to talk about nothing, and Tristan didn't have anything to latch onto other than his useless desire to leave? He would say he was loosing his mind— because how else was he going to feel about his brother obviously crushing on this woman who hates him for who he is, hearing them talking about nothing, picturing them on future dates together and living with the indignity of it for who knows how long? Was he going to say no to who his brother wanted to be with? Was he going to be a sissy gaylord faggot about it?
He obviously wasn't motivated by careful consideration when he went out to lose himself in the party. But I think if I could reconstruct what he was thinking, it was that if he had to deal with his brother dating a homophobe while carrying around for the whole thing, then surely the door for whatever was open. Surely each brother could use their body for what they wished, and deal with what the other did without complaint. He could take Byron dating Moonsong. He could take Byron stabbing himself in the thigh. I think that was why he acted so shocked and betrayed by Byron going to Vaughn: sure it was subjecting you to something you didn't want to deal with, but isn't that the road we were going down anyway?
Tristan says he'd be fine with Byron dating Moonsong if it kept him sane, but that he needed to go out and prowl to stay sane himself. And it really seems like the thing that breaks him is the prospect of watching from behind his brother's eyes as Byron plays out a letters-and-sodas nothing-beyond-kissing-and-holding-hands romance of boring and innocent and good straight couples with smiling faces behind white picket fences. The mockery of watching as Byron plays out the normative dream, complete with the simmering homophobia, and Tristan being around for the whole thing without the possibility of escaping into his own world.
I'm not saying Byron was in the wrong for forcing the compromise. But if I was Tristan I would've tried to kill him too.
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ok so after your post about aziraphale and crowley having a self denial contest i HAVE to rec this delightful fic about them going on a sex strike to see who gives in first and then coming up with increasingly elaborate ways to tempt each other
https://archiveofourown.org/works/24449359
REQUIRED READING WEE WOO WEE WOO I REPEAT WE GOT A NEW PIECE OF FANDOM REQUIRED READING ON OUR HANDS
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wanted to come clean about something real quick, i am annoying about canon all the time
however, i will never tolerate fic slander, ive dropped thousands of fics at this point cause i dont agree with the characterization in the same way i dont agree with some artists' renditions, but thats people spending their time writing something they love so "this fandom has horrible fics" is a shitty thing to say always
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random TEG funfact
for a very long time I had planned for Rodimus & Soundwave to have an "I can't lose you" moment centered around Trailbreaker getting seriously injured in an accident. The scene is written and intensely emotional, and I still really like it. I wish I could've cannibalized it.
But after I started getting Trailbreaker's backstory down, I felt bad for him. He had already been through enough. He, an innocent side character, shouldn't be injured just so our MCs could have a dramatic moment. And that's good writing advice imho.
injure the MCs instead! bahaha
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Alright uninformed rant time. It kind of bugs me that, when studying the Middle Ages, specifically in western Europe, it doesn’t seem to be a pre-requisite that you have to take some kind of “Basics of Mediaeval Catholic Doctrine in Everyday Practise” class.
Obviously you can’t cover everything- we don’t necessarily need to understand the ins and outs of obscure theological arguments (just as your average mediaeval churchgoer probably didn’t need to), or the inner workings of the Great Schism(s), nor how apparently simple theological disputes could be influenced by political and social factors, and of course the Official Line From The Vatican has changed over the centuries (which is why I’ve seen even modern Catholics getting mixed up about something that happened eight centuries ago). And naturally there are going to be misconceptions no matter how much you try to clarify things for people, and regional/class/temporal variations on how people’s actual everyday beliefs were influenced by the church’s rules.
But it would help if historians studying the Middle Ages, especially western Christendom, were all given a broadly similar training in a) what the official doctrine was at various points on certain important issues and b) how this might translate to what the average layman believed. Because it feels like you’re supposed to pick that up as you go along and even where there are books on the subject they’re not always entirely reliable either (for example, people citing books about how things worked specifically in England to apply to the whole of Europe) and you can’t ask a book a question if you’re confused about any particular point.
I mean I don’t expect to be spoonfed but somehow I don’t think that I’m supposed to accumulate a half-assed religious education from, say, a 15th century nobleman who was probably more interested in translating chivalric romances and rebelling against the Crown than religion; an angry 16th century Protestant; a 12th century nun from some forgotten valley in the Alps; some footnotes spread out over half a dozen modern political histories of Scotland; and an episode of ‘In Our Time’ from 2009.
But equally if you’re not a specialist in church history or theology, I’m not sure that it’s necessary to probe the murky depths of every minor theological point ever, and once you’ve started where does it end?
Anyway this entirely uninformed rant brought to you by my encounter with a sixteenth century bishop who was supposedly writing a completely orthodox book to re-evangelise his flock and tempt them away from Protestantism, but who described the baptismal rite in a way that sounds decidedly sketchy, if not heretical. And rather than being able to engage with the text properly and get what I needed from it, I was instead left sitting there like:
And frankly I didn’t have the time to go down the rabbit hole that would inevitably open up if I tried to find out
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what’s some of your favorite loz/Lu fics of all time? :)
Most of my favorite LU fics are here
but what you guys may not know is that I'm also a big fan of botw and modern au Zelink fics, however, take heed, most of these get a little spicy
Like Real People Do by ScarlettStorm: one of the best post-botw fics out there, lots of pining, I absolutely adore how Link's experience with Gender is portrayed, how he and Zelda are both treated as equally traumatized, as sometimes it feels like there's always one troubled one and one caregiver and I can get that for shorter fics but this one is long and beautifully balanced in that aspect. It also gets real horny at the end and in my opinion, it's very tasteful.
Alone With You by @deiliamedlini: honestly this author has a bunch of bangers, I'm waiting for their pirate au to finish so I can binge it all and I reread their Zelink oneshot collection all the time, this one is their modern high school au where Link is kind of a bad boy who is secretly Fucked Up, and Zelda is a popular girl and surprise surprise, they both get along really well. Normally I hate anything that reminds me of high school but this is the only exception. I love how previous characters are included, like how Link knows ASL bc he's friends with Pipit who is deaf and how Revali is a bitch and I still want to strangle him. Also big sister Aryll is a treasure and this fic does such a good job portraying Link's mental struggles and PTSD and how Zelda is being neglected and I'm also a big fan of the overarching plot of medical issues and trauma.
The Calamity of Link's Cargo Shorts by @zeldaseyebrows: I don't understand how someone can make smut so funny and so focused on Zelda's own self-hatred. Seriously though, there's a lot to love with this fic and I adore Zelda's pov. Sometimes you have to have sex before opening up emotionally and that's okay. Also, it's a modern au too, I just realized how many of these are modern aus.
Strangers in the Night by @zeldaelmo: Another modern au, this time Zelda has a kid from a ons with Link and he doesn't know about it for a bit, I just love Link being a dad and how they both work for a museum and there's just something about the courtroom scene that makes me want to reread it over and over again. Sometimes it's hit or miss with family ocs but Tetra is my favorite zelink child ever. All the fics on this list are ones I reread a lot but this one is the one I'm currently rereading bc it's been a few months lol. I love the domestic but also a little dysfunctional vibes, it's definitely not the normal romcom type of thing but I think I like this more.
K.K. Love Song by @airplanned: Again, modern au, pandemic edition. This one in particular has a certain unexplainable soft vibe, like there's some long-distance, Animal Crossing online romance and idk why I like it so much, I guess I was one of the suckers that got pulled in by new horizons when it came out so there's some strange kind of covid nostalgia and it's nice to see how a functional government would deal with the pandemic. Also, Link's grandma is a treasure and there's something sweet about crown princess Zelda meeting some guy on animal crossing and accidentally making him a public figure by dating him. Honestly, this author has a lot of great fics that I reread a lot lmao.
Farore's Day and Windvane Lane by Jenseits_der_Sterne: modern thanksgiving au, Zelda is a quirky scientist single mom and Link is her neighbor. I love Link being a nerd and Zelda being a bit of a disaster. Like she accidentally almost blows up her kitchen and he's just looking on with heart-eyes, after helping her put out the fires of course.
tbh, I'm probably not the best person to go for fic recs as I just find a few really good ones and then reread them till the end of time and rely on other people to recommend me things to read lmao, I hope this was at least a little helpful anyway.
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