#sam gave up an hour ago and just wants to see how many ways nat can beat bucky up

[cjsinkythoughts]

The Shield

Paring: Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Reader

Word Count: 5595

Warnings: !FATWS SPOILERS!, Cursing, John Walker, Emotions, Character Death, Mentions of Blood, I know people had a hard time with that last scene so please take caution because it is in this part! GIF at end is the ending scene, so be careful when you get towards the bottom! I feel like I’m forgetting some, so just know this one’s a bit more than the others.

A/N: Here it is, folks! The Part we’ve all been waiting for! It’s the longest one I’ve written so far but so much happened and I couldn’t find a better spot to end it than where the episode ended. Thank you all for being patient with me today. I know I didn’t get this out as quickly as I would’ve the past few weeks, but you guys are so awesome! Seriously! I love that you understand I do have a life and work comes first! Thank you, thank you!

This Part is a doozy, guys, and…I’m sorry? But not really. I’m SUPER excited to see where this is gonna go, especially considering Episode 5 is supposed to be the real tear jerker. I can’t believe there’s only two more episodes! I’ve grown so attached to these characters just in the past month! I’m so glad I’m able to share some of my thoughts and feelings with you guys, too! You’re honestly the best!

I’ll be doing more One Shots this week, so look for those on the Masterlist. I’m still taking requests for them, so if there’s anything you want explored about the reader and her relationships that you don’t think will be explored in this Series, just ask and I’ll try to add it to the One Shot list.

As always, this isn’t beta’d so please excuse any mistakes! Thank you for reading, be kind to yourself and others, enjoy this part and stay tuned!

FATWS Masterlist

cjsinkythoughts Masterlist

(I couldn’t decide on which GIF to use because there are so many good ones! Thank you Tumblr Creators!)

!SPOILERS UNDER CUT!

“Doll…hey. Doll. C’mon, sweetheart. We gotta get moving.”

You cracked your eyes open begrudgingly, squinting up to see Bucky’s amused grin, head tilted and eyes soft. “Huh?”

He chuckled as you rubbed your eyes, confusion lifting an eyebrow. “The funeral. Zemo said we’ve gotta go if we’re gonna make it in time.”

“Wait, but…huh?”

Sniggering again at your reaction, he held up your phone. “You passed out in the middle of a chapter, sleepyhead.” He teased lightly, grabbing your hand and gently pulling you to sit upright. “It’s almost been an hour.”

You huffed tiredly, stretching and placing your feet on the floor, taking back the phone he held out to you. “Why didn’t you wake me up?”

“You haven’t been sleeping well.” He stated, like it should’ve been obvious. “How’s your arm feeling?”

“Better than earlier. It’s just sore. That’s all.”

He studied your features for any hint of a lie. Not finding one, he nodded, holding out his hand. “Okay. But tell me if it starts bothering you.”

You placed your hand in his, marveling for a split second at how big his hands were compared to yours - something you noticed every time but still it never ceased to astound you. He tugged you up, and you looked up to meet his worried eyes, remembering his question.

“I will, Buck. Promise.”

He nodded, tilting his head towards the door. “C’mon, cuddle bug. We don’t wanna miss this.”

A groan passed your lips, but you nodded and followed Bucky out into the main room, where Sam chuckled at you from his spot at the table. “Sleeping beauty has finally awoken.”

You flipped Sam off groggily. “Are we going or not?”

“Do you wanna wake up s’more first?”

“No.” You answered the one armed brunette. “I’ll just splash some water on my face or something. I’ll be fine by the time we get there. Where’s-”

“Looking for me?”

Zemo strolled out, now dressed in that coat of his, that smug smirk on his lips. You scowled. “I wish I wasn’t.”

Sam stood up, standing subconsciously between you and Zemo. “Let’s head out.”

You nodded in agreement, shooting the Baron one more glare, before following him out the door and into the city, Bucky right besides you, shoulders brushing as if you weren’t ignoring him just hours prior.

The walk was mostly silent, a few jests between Bucky and Sam plus a couple comments from Zemo here and there. You talked about strategy, with Sam bringing up the fact that he wanted to try convincing Karli to step down. Zemo didn’t look pleased with the arrangement, but both you and Bucky relented, agreeing to let Sam at least try.

It wasn’t until you were close to your destination according to Zemo that anything exciting happened.

“Karli Morgenthau is too dangerous for you guys to be pulling this shit!”

Hell. No. 

The moment the voice registered in your brain, your jaw tightened, your teeth starting to grind together as you held back the very not nice things you wanted to say. 

“Ah! How’d you find us now?” Bucky called out, tucking you into his side protectively, and a little possessively you noted, as Walker and Hoskins came down the steps, the two groups nearing each other.

You were relieved when the subject of Zemo escaping jail went by relatively quickly, Walker latching onto the fact that you were going to talk to Karli instead of focusing on the escaped fugitive in front of him.

You very nearly punched him when he ran in front of you after Sam told him the plan, making the four of you stop in your tracks, but Bucky’s arm tightened around your shoulders, holding you in place next to him.

“You’re gonna let him do this?” Walker questioned Bucky in disbelief, self righteous judgement practically dripping from your tone. “You’re gonna let your partner walk into a room with a super soldier alone?”

Bucky’s jaw ticked. “He’s dealt with worse. And he’s not my partner.”

“And you?” Walker narrowed his eyes towards you. “I expected more from you; the last original Avenger.”

You snorted, shaking your head. He obviously didn’t know how chaotic the Avengers were. What Sam was proposing? You’d seen it a million times with Steve alone. Not considering Nat, Clint, Thor, even Bruce and Tony. All of them willing to try to negotiate before running in, bullets raining and hell rising. “First, I’m not the last original. I’m technically not even an original. Second, I trust Sam with my life and I’m standing by his decision. He’s my brother. As a soldier, I would’ve thought you understood that.”

Before he could respond, Sam stepped around Bucky. You saw the reluctance in Walker’s eyes as he admitted a temporary defeat once Hoskins agreed with Sam. The fact that he was so unwilling to try to save more lives - including Karli’s - made the truth that he wasn’t, and would never, be your Captain harden deeper into your heart.

Ignoring Walker’s confusion as you followed the little girl Zemo befriended - which was weird, you’d admit, but it was getting you closer to Karli - Bucky’s arm slipped from your shoulders, hand sliding across your back and skimming down your arm to grip your hand. Even through your jacket, you felt goosebumps erupt along his fingers’ trail.

You finally came to your destination and you let out a small breath. If everything went smoothly, this mission could finally be over and you could go home and take a bath, get take out, get out a bottle of wine, watch TV, and just relax.

What a dream.

“Hey.” You stopped Sam before he could go through the entrance of where the girl said Karli was, holding his forearm. “You want me to come with you?”

He shook his head. “I think it’ll be better if I go alone.”

You nodded, letting go without any hesitance. “Okay. Be careful.”

“Always.” And despite all you’ve been through, no matter how many times he’s followed Steve’s lead in doing something stupid, you knew he meant it. You nodded again, before he disappeared around the corner.

You leaned back against the wall, Bucky once again wrapping an arm around your shoulder now that you weren’t walking - he liked having mobility on the move, hence the reason he held your hand instead - leaning besides you and pulling you against his chest.

Ten minutes. You tried looking at Bucky’s watch, which was on the wrist of the arm around you. He noticed and turned his wrist slightly, bending his elbow more, which brought you even closer to him, showing you the time.

Giving a small sigh, you nodded slightly and dropped your head back against his bicep, your hands shoving in your pockets, one of your feet coming up to rest against the wall. Bucky shifted to your other side so he could stand in front of the doors to where Karli and Sam were, pulling you against his back, arms wrapping around your shoulders tightly.

It was a long ten minutes. You kept eyeing Walker, and you couldn’t help the anger burning through you as he held the shield in his hands. That damn shield. It wasn’t his. It would never be his. And he would never understand it. The fact that the shield didn’t make Captain America. The shield isn’t what made Steve a good man. Not even the Serum did. He already was one. Steve made the shield what it was, not the other way around.

But then you remembered a conversation you had, years ago, and your eyes flitted up to Bucky’s hardened face, the brunette staring intensely at the ground.

~

You didn’t get it. You were confused. You knew how important Barnes - Bucky - was to Steve. But apparently you didn’t understand it quite yet.

You watched from the entrance of the hallway, leaning against the wall, as Bucky went under once more.

Steve stood there for a moment longer, before turning and walking towards you. “Why’d you do it?”

He raised an eyebrow at you while you turned to walk with him down the hall. “Do what?”

“Give up the shield. And don’t say it doesn’t belong to you. It does. Howard gave it to you. You’re the reason it’s…a symbol.”

He hummed. “And what exactly is it a symbol for, honey?”

You scoffed. “Uh, freedom? Justice? Resilience? The defense of the whole life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness thing?”

He stopped, facing you with a strange expression on his face, thoughtful. “I dropped it because I can’t be that anymore. Not right now. People don’t have the same beliefs they used to have. How can I stand up for freedom and let the Sokovia Accords track every person they deem a threat, just like HYDRA tried doing? How can I be a symbol for justice and let Bucky take the fall for something that he wasn’t in control of? I can’t. And until the world is ready to change…I can’t be Captain America.”

~

And suddenly, it seemed to click. Steve gave up the shield for Bucky because the world wasn’t ready to admit it was wrong. Just like Sam gave up the shield for himself and his family because the world wasn’t ready for the truth that would come with him becoming Captain America.

God…when did a metal circle become so complicated?

“What’s goin’ on in that pretty lil’ head’a yours?” His whisper in your ear startled you out of your thoughts, his nose brushing against your temple tenderly as he placed a chaste kiss on your cheek.

You looked up at him and shook your head. Of all the things Steve gave up, he never gave up Bucky. And it used to confuse you, but you understood then. His blue eyes sparkling with curiosity and slight concern, his fingers tracing patterns along your collarbone with a barely-there touch that was so light it didn’t seem to exist. You finally understood. Not just Steve’s decision, but Sam’s too. And maybe you didn’t understand it fully, and that was okay, because you weren’t them, so you never would, but you understood a little bit.

“Nothing.” You shook your head, keeping your voice down so the others couldn’t hear, the conversation being a private one, “I’m just waiting for this to be over.”

He hummed, nodding in agreement, setting his chin on your head. “Me too.”

Walker started pacing the room about half way through, getting too antsy for your liking. “Shhh.” Bucky mumbled under his breath, feeling you tense as Walker started talking. “It hasn’t been ten minutes, John. Just sit tight.”

“Don’t do that. Don’t patronize me.”

“He knows what he’s doing.” Bucky stated confidently, straightening slightly from his leaning position, arms falling from your form. The two of you exchanged glances as Walker checked the clock over on the far wall, blocked from your view.

“I’m going in.” Walker strode across the room, heading for the entrance, no doubt willing to steam roll anything - anyone - in his way.

Bucky stopped him with a hand on his chest. You glanced back and forth between the two as Walker spoke, arms crossed tightly over your chest. “Buck…we promised him ten minutes.” You reminded him, seeing his resolve crumble a bit. You could guess he was thinking of the nightmares. The people he couldn’t save. The blood he already considered on his hands.

Walker used his moment of hesitation, shoving past him roughly. “I’m not waiting.”

“John!”

“Walker!”

You followed after him, you and Bucky arguing with him and Hoskins about giving Sam more time, but it was too late.

“Karli Morgenthau! You’re under arrest!”

“Fuck.” You hissed out when you saw Sam’s panicked expression, looking at you confused. Walker was flown across the room when Karli punched him, Bucky shoving Hoskins out of the way to run after her.

“Y/N-”

You threw your hands up. “I tried, Sam! C’mon!”

You and Sam ran over to some stairs, turning corners and trying to remember what the building looked like from outside to cut her off, but you only ran into Bucky again. 

“I wish we had the layout or something.” You grumbled. “We were that close-”

“We’re not done yet, doll.” Nodding, you followed the boys out, Bucky pausing every so often to try to hear anything. “I’ve got gunshots.” At that, the three of you took off towards the sound, Bucky leading the way.

Just around the corner from where Bucky heard the gunshots, you thought you saw a couple people slip around another bend. Noticing you had stopped, Bucky backtracked. “You okay?’

“Yeah.” Deciding it wasn’t worth the pursuit, you turned to him and nodded towards the doorway Sam already went through. He gave you a look, but nodded and the two of you jogged into the room.

You sighed heavily, seeing Zemo knocked out on the floor, Walker standing over him and broken vials that were previously full of, what you assumed was, the Serum. Hoskins ran in right after you, meaning no one but Walker and Zemo knew what happened. Meaning you would probably never get the full, true story.

What fun it is to work with manipulators and liars.

********************

“I don’t like him.” Bucky grumbled, the two of you walking up to the place you were staying in, Bucky holding the door open for you.

“I know you don’t, Buck. I don’t either.” You had asked Bucky to go with you to get some fresh air once you got back, Zemo having woken up a few minutes after and Walker and Hoskins had to make a call or something official like the good soldiers they were. “He’s hiding something.”

“You think?” Bucky scoffed, giving you a look.

You rolled your eyes. “I mean…I don’t know. When we found him and Zemo…my gut twisted.”

He nodded in understanding, his face twisting into a scowl. “Yeah. Mine did too.”

You stopped him before you could walk through the door to the main room. “Do me a favor?” He nodded again with a little hum. Catching his chin between your fingers, your free hand moved to smooth out the creases between his brow. “Stop brooding so much. It makes me worried.”

His tongue darted out to wet his lips, features softening slightly. “Are you really gonna leave in the morning? I know you’ve had a lot of people telling you to take a break, and it’s selfish for me to ask you to stay, but…I dunno if I can finish this without you.”

“I-” You sighed, ducking your head as you thought of a response, before looking up in his wide eyes, begging for you to stick around longer. “Let’s just finish the day and see what happens next. Okay?”

He bit his lip, nodding slightly. You gave him a smile, before tugging on his hand. “I need a drink.”

He chuckled at that. “That I can fix, doll.” He, again, opened the door for you, and the two of you walked in.

“What a gentleman. Straight outta the 40’s.” You joked, making him roll his eyes.

He took off his jacket, heading to the kitchen, while you sat on the opposite side of the island. “Somethin’s not right about Walker.”

Sam gave you two an amused look. “You don’t say.”

“Well, I know a crazy when I see one.” He opened the lid of the bottle he grabbed, starting to pour two glasses of whiskey for the both of you. “Because I am crazy.”

You rolled your eyes as Sam responded, “can’t argue with that.”

“You shouldn’t have given him the shield.”

Giving Bucky a disapproving look over the rim of your glass, you sipped your drink, narrowing your eyes when he ignored you. “I didn’t give him the shield.”

“Well Steve definitely didn’t.”

Your glass slammed down on the counter. Why did he have to bring this up right now? Seriously? You were just having a nice conversation about places you wanted to visit while taking a walk outside. Why was he suddenly snapping?

Before you could scold him, the doors burst open, making your head whip over as Walker stormed in, “ordering” you to hand over Zemo.

You stayed sitting, leaning on the counter and facing the opposite wall as Sam told him off, giving an amused snicker as you sipped your drink. Bucky sat besides you, facing Walker, and you recognized from the angle he was positioning himself that he was blocking you from Walker’s view, whether intentional or not.

You raised an eyebrow, turning in interest when Walker put down the shield, knowing Sam wasn’t about to fight the man. What an ego the blonde had.

Before anything could happen, however, a spear pierced through the air, lodging in the pillar next to Walker’s head.

Your frustration with Bucky’s comment flew out of your head as Ayo and a few other Dora Milaje walked in. Bucky sat up straighter and you stood up, leaning ever so slightly against his arm.

You nearly facepalmed, a sound of complete disbelief leaving you as Walker introduced himself. Sam looked over at you two, an entertained, slightly incredulous smile on his face.

Sam tried warning him. He really did. But Walker, you’ve come to find, was an arrogant, egotistical narcissist who only wanted to win and would do whatever it takes to do so. Even when there wasn’t really a winner. At least, not in that situation. It seemed that Walker liked ignoring the gray area in the world, which wasn’t good. Not in the least.

Which is why you couldn’t really feel sorry for the man. You saw it coming as soon as he told them they didn’t have jurisdiction. And the moment he touched Ayo?

You put your chin on Bucky’s shoulder - who had stood up from his spot - watching the Dora Milaje kick Walker’s ass, wincing and cringing mockingly at the right moments, making Bucky smirk at you.

“We should do something.” Sam said, although he didn’t look thrilled about the prospect.

Bucky crossed his arms. “Looking strong, John!”

You gave a slight snort, not wanting to encourage anything, but unable to hold in your amusement. Bucky winked at you, clinking his cup of whiskey with your own, before taking a gulp.

“Bucky.” 

You huffed and stepped back at Sam’s tone. “C’mon, Buck.”

“Fine.” Bucky grunted. “But ‘M not happy about it.”

Soon, the three of you, plus Walker and Hoskins, were all occupied with a member of the Dora Milaje. You knew you couldn’t take them; they were on a higher level that Natasha, and you could barely beat her. But you weren’t necessarily trying to win.

It was a strange fight, knowing that no one - except Walker, probably - actually wanted to hurt anyone. Of course, that didn’t stop one of them from exploiting your injured shoulder that she spotted rather quickly. The hits were quick and precise, the tip of her spear cutting along the graze, hitting the spot just perfect enough to reopen it. The stitches that had been placed only a couple days ago ripped, making you wince and clutch your now bleeding shoulder.

“Oh fuck.” You groaned. “You were always good with those things.”

She gave you an almost apologetic look, before she looked over to Ayo, who stepped through the room towards the bathroom where Zemo had locked himself in during the chaos.

When you caught sight of the shoulder thing she did to Bucky, his metallic arm now laying on the floor, his eyes wide and his stance stunned, your jaw nearly dropped. You guessed it made sense that they had a way to do that, but, still. None of you were expecting it.

“Did you know they could do that?” Sam asked once they started leaving, Bucky picking up his arm and connecting it to his shoulder.

“No.” The arm whirred as he swung it, getting it back to normal.

You couldn’t help the little giggle that left you, making Bucky raise an eyebrow at you. You tried holding in more laughs, but they just kept coming. “She-she...she disarmed you!”

Bucky rolled his eyes as you chortled, holding your stomach and bending over. “Ha ha. Very funny.”

“Oh come on!” You straightened and wiped your eyes. “That was good! Wasn’t it, Sammy?”

Sammy chuckled and nodded. “I’ll admit, it was pretty good. This, however, is not.”

Your laughter died as Sam made his way over to the bathroom, the light air that came with your cackles dissipating as quickly as it came.

“I can’t believe he pulled an El Chapo.”

You stared at the drain that was uncovered - large enough for Zemo to slip inside and escape. He did it. The son of a bitch finally did it. It took him long enough. You would’ve betted against him days ago.

“I can.” Bucky turned and grabbed your hand. “Come on. Let’s get you cleaned up.”

*********************

“I thought you told them.”

Bucky looked up from wrapping your shoulder, an eyebrow raised. “What?”

“I thought you told them. The Dora Milaje. Wakanda. T’Challa. I thought you told them about Zemo.”

He leaned back with a sigh. “It was kinda a last minute decision. You know that. You were there.”

You nodded. “I do. But I also know what they’ve done for you. Shuri and Ayo. I was there for that, too. And you know what he did to them. To their country. Their king.”

“I know, I know. I almost died several times because of it.”

Your eyebrows pinched in confusion. “So why-”

“I thought it’d be quick. I thought, maybe, I could do it without them finding out and then we could get to Karli and they wouldn’t be disappointed. Win win.”

Your cheek caught between your teeth as you thought. “You could’ve just asked-”

He shook his head. “They would’ve said no. You know that.”

“Okay. Fine. Yes. I know that. But…but giving them a warning would’ve been better than this.” He hung his head, closing his eyes. “Bucky. Hey,” hooking a finger under his chin, you tilted his head back up to look at you. “I know it’s been hard for you. Everything has. And I’m sorry I dragged you into this. I shouldn’t have let you come along. You should be healing, and it’s my fault you’re not.” He opened his mouth, face scrunching up in disagreement, but you shook your head. “It’s true. I just…I didn’t know it would come this far.” You gnawed on your bottom lip studying those captivating eyes, before sighing. “Which is why I’m not leaving.”

He perked up, those pretty eyes going wide, jaw slackening. “You-you’re not?!”

You shook your head. As much as you wanted to run away, you couldn’t. It wouldn’t be right. “It wouldn’t be fair to you or Sam. I promised to help, and I brought you into it. So I’m gonna stay.

“Are you, uh…are you sure? You don’t hafta if you don’t wanna, doll. I know I kinda pushed you earlier, but-”

“I’m sure Buck.” You nodded firmly. “Just…do something for me?”

“I dunno if I can promise not brooding, sweetheart.”

You giggled at his words. “Not that. Just…stop giving Sam a hard time. About the shield. Please.”

His soft features hardened and he scowled. “If he didn’t give it up-”

“He thought it was going to the museum. I told you about that, remember? I told you we’d go when I got back.”

Giving a slight nod, he sighed. “We never did.”

“We will. But, I’m serious, Buck. Please. It’s not his fault. He did exactly what Steve did.” At Bucky’s confused look, you pursed your lips, looking down at his hands, starting to play with his fingers. “Remember how I was thinking during those ten minutes we had?” He nodded. “I was thinking about how Steve gave the shield back to Tony. After saving you. In Siberia. You remember that?” Another nod was given, so you continued. “It was for you, James. Because you made him realize that he didn’t want to be the face of a country that preached one thing, but did another. And that’s what Sam did. He did it for his family. For himself. Because no one wants to fight for a country that goes against your personal beliefs, no matter what they say.”

“I-I don’t understand.” Bucky’s eyes squinted, his brow creasing as he tried processing what you were telling him.

“That’s okay. Not everyone will. Really only they can understand their own reasoning. But you have to try to understand that he did what he thought was best for himself. For Steve. For the shield. And I know - dammit do I know - that it’s the last thing left of him. But it is just metal. Isn’t it? Steve’s the reason it is what it is. No one else. And no one is going to change that.”

Bucky took a breath, glossy, worried eyes meeting yours. “Walker’s going to ruin it. I know he is. I can feel it. Everything Steve worked for. I don’t care about Captain America. I care about the kid from Brooklyn who wanted to make a difference, no matter how little he was. I trusted him. I followed him through bullets and blood, with only that shield between us and them. He was home on a battlefield in Italy across the ocean from New York. And that shield was the welcome mat. It doesn’t matter what it says, what it looks like…but it protected my home when I couldn’t. But now? I feel like it’s tearing my home down. Pulling out the bricks. And it hurts. It was never about the shield, Y/N. It was always about the man it protected when I couldn’t be there for him. And now?”

Gathering him in your arms as he trailed off, you gave a couple little sniffles, pressing your face in his hair, nails scratching the nape of his neck lightly. “I’ll be your welcome mat, Buckaroo.” You offered.

He shook his head, pulling away to hold your face between his hands. “No, sweetheart. You’re not the welcome mat. You’re the new bricks replacing the old. You’re…you’re my home, now, doll.”

You swallowed thickly, unable to handle the rush of emotions that just poured through you, the sudden change in topic making you feel more vulnerable than you’d like. You leaned forwards, placing a gentle kiss to the corner of his mouth, feeling him go lax in your arms. “And you’re mine.” You murmured softly, before getting up and heading out for the room, unable to stay any longer. You still had a mission to do. One that became even more desperate with Zemo loose, Walker unhinged, and Karli being so close.

******************

There was a silent agreement to not bring up your conversation. Not yet, at least. Sam had eyed you both when you came out of the room, saying you were ready to get moving, but he didn’t say anything either.

None of you really knew where you were going, only what you had to do. Find Zemo and get to Karli before Walker could. Both of which were a lot easier said than done.

Until Sam got a call from Sarah, who told him Karli contacted her personally and threatened her and her sons. She left a contact number for Sam, evidently wanting to meet. His phone dinged not a minute after he texted the number.

“She said come alone.”

“Well that’s not happening.” You opposed, crossing your arms.

Bucky nodded with your sentence. “We’re coming with you.”

Sam didn’t say anything against it, the three of you exchanging glances, before heading out to the location, changing into your tactical suits along the way.

Karli didn’t seem to mind you and Bucky tagging along, and you understood why the moment she mentioned not killing Sam because he wasn’t hiding behind a shield. It was a distraction. They were going after Walker.

It was confirmed only moments later when Sharon contacted Sam. “Looks like he found them, or maybe they found him.”

As soon as Sam announced that it was Walker, you jumped into action, Sam disabling Karli for just the right amount of time for you to get a head start. “I’ll send you the location. Go.” He told Bucky, who nodded and took off in his super soldier sprint. “You hitching a ride?”

You rolled your eyes at his slight tease. “I hate this so much.” You grumbled, catching his hand as he took off in the air with his bird costume. He held onto you tightly, like the millions of times you’d done this before, although it didn’t make you any less dizzy, traveling that fast, that high, with only his hold keeping you from dropping. “You’re lucky I trust you so much!”

He gave a small chuckle at your shout over the wind. “We’re landing! Brace yourself!” You followed his order, just in time for him to break through the glass ceiling of the building Walker was in. The both of you landed on a platform on the staircase just as a Flag Smasher was thrown through double glass doors, down the stairs, and into a power box. Your eyes went wide as Walker strolled down the steps, oozing a confidence that made you nervous. The moment Walker stopped the Flag Smasher - the Super Soldier - from hitting him with the pipe, you knew even before he twisted it like a pretzel.

“Sam.” You breathed out. You couldn’t even do anything, only watching as the Flag Smasher got up from being thrown again, and running down a hall.

“What’d you do?”

“They got Lemar.” Was the only reply he gave, brushing past you and Sam. You gave Sam a look, but he just jerked his head down the hall, in the direction the Flag Smasher went and the way Walker started heading. You nodded, willing to drop it for now to save someone’s life, but you were so bringing it up once this was done.

Jogging into the room, you should’ve expected the ambush in the room, but, to be honest, they didn’t take as much advantage as they could’ve, so it wasn’t too difficult of a fight. You had trained with Steve millions of times before, so you knew how to go against a Super Soldier. Granted, your Cap wasn’t trying to kill you while training, but it was better than nothing.

You protected your shoulder, knowing that was your weak point, while trying to disguise it so whoever you were fighting wouldn’t realize your Achilles’ Heel. Something you often found while dealing with Steve, and even Bucky, was that Super Soldiers, as quick as they were, tended to favor the super strength side of their enhancements. This made it easier for you to dodge the attacks, knowing most of your blows wouldn’t do much.

Knowing you wouldn’t be able to stay on the defensive for long, you decided to try to get an advantage over them. Disarming them and taking their knife was easy enough. A small advantage, yeah, but now you had a weapon, and you could work with that.

You weren’t exactly sure when Bucky joined the fight, but he did, immediately coming over to you when you body kicked your opponent, helping you up. “That was a Steve move.” Your eyes caught sight of the Flag Smasher behind him and you shoved his shoulder down, throwing your knife, making it land solidly in the man’s shoulder. Bucky looked up at you from his crouch, impressed. “And that was a me move.”

You shrugged. “I’m a visual learner.”

You, Sam, and Bucky were about to go for another round with the guys when a sickening crack sounded behind you, and you whipped around. 

Hoskins was against a split pillar, a crimson streak running down his forehead, head lolling to the side, lips red and cracked. The fight stopped as Walker rushed over to his friend, but you knew there was no way he survived. A punch from a Super Soldier? That hard?

Eyeing the Flag Smashers, you turned to Sam and Bucky when they started dispersing, Karli running out as well. They nodded towards you and the three of you took off after her, not wanting to let her get away again and, for you, at least, wanting to give Walker some time.

You weren’t expecting his grief to turn into such raw hatred. 

Running up to the city square, you didn’t actually see it happen. Just the aftermath. Which was good, considering you nearly threw up just seeing that.

You heard the change in Bucky’s breathing, barely recognizing the way he stepped in front of you, only realizing you stepped closer when you felt his sleeve against your palms, fingers tightly wrapped around his forearm. A choked sound came from somewhere, but you didn’t know it was you, even as Bucky reached his arm around to hold your waist, keeping you behind his shoulder. 

Tears leaked down your face silently, eyes unable to look away as Walker straightened, sliding the shield on his arm, too nonchalantly for someone who just murdered another in front of a crowd full of people, cameras pointed towards him.

The shield. That piece of metal you had been wondering so deeply about the past couple of weeks. The link to the first person you’d ever loved. Ruined. Tarnished. Stained.

You could barely breathe, your throat clenching so tightly it was a wonder you were able to get anything out at all.

“James…”

#cjsinkythoughts #cjswriting #cjsspoilers #fatws spoilers #tfatws spoilers #falcon and the winter soldier spoilers #fatws #tfatws #falcon and the winter soldier #fatws series #fatws pt 5.2 #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky x you #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky x y/n #bucky barnes x avenger!reader #bucky x avenger!reader #bucky barnes #❤🐦💙🦾 #💙🦾

[shurisneakers]

harmless (xiii)

Summary: Bucky volunteers to go stop a small time villain, but nothing can prepare him for what exactly he has to deal with. (Bucky x villain!reader)

Warnings: cursing, frustrated bucky, dramatic reader, smidge of angst, guns, little bit of violence, obnoxious flirting, and kidnapping lol

Word count: 6.2k

A/N: welcome to chaos week >:) this is the first of three updates coming out this week (if i can finish the last one in time).  big thank you to my love @no-shit-sherl0ck for the kidnaped!reader idea, and that one anon who suggested the inator that’s used here. i know you wanted to see it in a zoo but i couldn’t really figure out a way to use that so i referenced it a bunch in previous chapters. oh and also @ginevranights​ for this specific imagery 

Previous Part  || Series Masterlist

Who the fuck kidnaps a villain in this day and age?

Saturday started normally enough.

Nat kicked Bucky’s ass in training, evening the score to 120 and 120. He blames it on the lack of sleep. She tells him that it’s his fault he stayed up late to binge watch 911 Lone Star.

He still thinks it was worth it.

The team’s sunshines and rainbows that morning. Someone had cooked up a batch of pancakes and fresh orange juice. Someone else burnt the bacon but left to feed his dog before anyone could complain.

Nat opened up the newspaper. Different sections went to different people until Bucky got stuck with the entertainment section. Fun, considering that he doesn’t even recognise half the names. He’d have to pretend to be interested until the next rotation.

He watches the orange juice levitate in front of him from the corner of his eye and just assumes that Wanda’s getting a refill even though she could have just asked him to pass it. He smells the next batch of bacon burning and figures that Clint is back.

Sam’s beside him, annoying him about how long it takes for him to read about which new celebrity relationship just ended and Bucky retaliates by reading even slower. Fuck you.

He’s on his second stack of pancakes absolutely drenched in maple syrup when the doors to the elevator open and Marie steps out, laptop in her hand.

An instant chorus of hello’s and invitations to have some charred bacon resound through the table. She politely declines them with a small smile, instead opening her laptop and placing it in front of Bucky without further ado. 

He looks at her questioningly, slowly swallowing whatever was in his mouth.

“An email for you.” She tuts her head towards it. “It has a video attachment of your friend.”

Bucky has plans to not watch the video in front of everyone, given that the content could range anywhere from you reading out fanfiction about him to a deep-fake of him singing a Whitney Houston song.

Both of which you have done before and would do again, without any hesitation.

“Aren’t you gonna watch it?” Wanda asks from across the table.

He slowly shakes his head no, cutting his stack into smaller pieces.

“If what’s in it is real, it’s important,” Marie stresses.

“What’s in it?” he inquires instead, hoping that the team would stop staring at him. If Marie was implying strongly that he needed to watch then something was wrong.

“Just watch it, man.” Sam’s statement has everyone agreeing with him. Bucky can’t refuse now, and if the team makes fun of him for the next month about how he looks good belting Greatest Love of All, he’s going to personally assassinate you.

He clicks on the email, noticing it came from a throwaway address. Probably untraceable, if the cards are played right. 

The video opens to grainy footage, which is stupid considering modern technological advancements. If this is one more of your stupid LARPing sessions, it could definitely wait till after lunch. 

But, he instantly recognises your silhouette strapped to a chair and suddenly the room feels very cold around him. His hand automatically clutches onto a bead from the bracelet you gave him that still remained tied to his left arm more often than not.

“Speak,” someone commands off camera.

“About what?” You sound annoyed, exasperated even.

“Why you’re here.”

“I’m here because you have unaddressed feelings of childhood insecurity.”

“I warned you to take this seriously.”

Bucky’s eyes widen slightly but his body relaxes the minute he reads the situation. 

The team’s crowded around him, he can feel it. His attention remains on the screen in front of him.

“Who even are you sending this to?” You don’t sound the least bit threatened. “My roommate’s not at home but my cat is and I don’t think she’d care.”

”You’ve made a complete joke out of villains everywhere. Fraternising with the enemies, the Avengers,” he spits the name with so much vitriol. “You’ve erased what it’s like to be truly evil. Turned us into a laughing stock.”

“If it takes one person to undermine your whole movement then maybe it wasn’t strong enough to begin with.” You look at someone outside the lens, face scrunching in distaste. “Also your costume’s ugly.”

“F.R.I.D.A.Y., can you trace this voice?” Bucky asks, receiving an immediate confirmation. “Figure out who it is.”

“On it.”

“Tell them. Tell them we are a serious threat and are to be feared.”

"No,” you say resolutely. “You’re an overgrown manchild. Go watch Teletubbies or something.”

“She does not give a shit,” Clint marvels at the situation, a piece of half eaten burnt toast between his fingers.

You didn’t. And if he knew you in the slightest, which he prided himself on at this point, you already had six different ways of getting out of there.

“She knows she’s going to be fine,” Bucky murmurs, returning back to take a bite of his pancakes. “She’s probably still there just to irritate him.”

He zeroes in on your wrist to see if the teleportation watch was still there but no, your wrists are bare. Guess you forgot.

“You have to.”

“Why?”

“Because that’s how a real villain does it.”

“A real villain- what are you, gatekeeping the villain community?” You scoff. “You sound like a fuckin’ incel.”

“Just send them a message,” the guy bellows, hitting a table.

“She’s going to frustrate them to death.” An accurate observation, Sam.

“Okay, jeez, fine.”

Bucky just knows that you rolled your eyes at that moment.

He had faith in you, or in your abilities at the very least. While every wisecrack could possibly inch you closer towards harm, you probably wouldn’t be making them unless you felt completely secure in your situation.

“Help, I’m totally kidnapped and in danger. Save me because I can’t do it myself. This man is too powerful and strong and sooo scary.”

“Do you think she has a strategy?”

“Definitely.”

“You’re not worried, James?” Wanda asks curiously. “I thought she was your friend.”

“She is my friend.” He reaches over to take the jug of orange from across the table. “That’s why I’m not worried.”

“Are you going to fight the Avengers?” you interrupt his endless tirade. “Because that’s a stupid plan. You get how that’s a stupid plan, right?”

“Let them come. I’m prepared.”

“With what? A stick you found outside? A Nerf gun? Man, you’ve tied my hands with fuckin’ zip ties, you can’t be serious-”

“Shut up,” he roared and the stand shakes slightly from where he stamps his feet. “Our army is enough.”

“Wow,” you exhale. “I wish I had your confidence, I really do. I want to study you under a microscope.”

“I have reinforcements.” It sounds like he turns to the camera to address it directly. “This is a warning. Your friends have an hour to find you or things are gonna turn ugly. This is what real evil looks like.”

“Evil dresses in a dollar store Speedo, apparently.” The man pays you no heed, instead picking up the camera. “Hey, sarge, if you’re watching this, don’t bother. I’m fine, it’s not even the real me-”

The camera cuts to black.

“When was this video sent?” Nat looks at Marie, eyebrows drawn together.

“About ten minutes ago.”

Bucky clicks out of the email, determined to get at least half his breakfast in him before he left to see what’s up with your situation. A notification pops up immediately.

[email protected] just sent you an email.

A video attachment.

“We got another one,” Bucky informs the team, drawing their attention back to the screen from the informal conversation that had erupted between them about what they could do.

This time, there’s a subject line included.

Attack on the Clone.

"Ain’t that a Star Wars movie?" he asks, craning his neck to look at Clint.

"That's Attack of the Clones," Sam corrects. "Probably autocorrect."

Bucky narrowed his eyes in suspicion at him, jaw sliding outward before falling back into place. Enough times had Sam called him Fucky in the group chat and gotten away with it for him not to be wary.

“Or a code,” Wanda suggests, too many crime thrillers read and podcasts listened in her spare time. She occasionally brought them over to Self Care Saturday, introducing him to the world of true crime as a bit of light content while they snacked on chocolate chip cookies he baked. “Like the Zodiac.”

“For what?” Bucky peers over at her.

“All I remember from that movie is them rolling around a field together,” Clint mutters. “Maybe that’s how you’re supposed to save her.”

“I’m not saving anyone. Look at her, she’s fine.” Is he the only one who saw it?

When he’s met with skeptical looks and no other useful suggestions, he presses play on the video.

This time it's clearer footage. It hardly takes him a second to ascertain where it was.

"That's her lair." It showed the pathway leading up to the flat concrete building, exactly where the intercom should be.

There was a black Sedan parked haphazardly outside, engine still on judging by the sound of the radio blasting an AC/DC song. 

Within a few seconds, someone drags you from the entrance of the lair to the car, despite your very clear protests and opposition, shoving you inside before it takes off in full speed, tires screeching. 

"F.R.I.D.A.Y., track the car from that video. Check all the CCTV and surveillance footage from around the area that you can find," Bucky commands, taking a sip of orange juice.  

"Why would they send us that?" Clint pipes up. "They make their email untraceable but send us a video of the fuckin' abduction itself?"

"I don't know." Bucky shakes his head, setting his glass down. "She probably convinced them to."

It was an unusual scenario, he realised that. But his eyebrows lower in contemplation, his lip caged between his lip before a thought suddenly occurs to him. A laugh in disbelief almost escapes his throat ad he pushes it down with some freshly cut strawberries. 

"And they listened?"

"I don't think you realise how annoying she can be." He knows, though. He knows. "Bet they regret it, though. I should tell them to keep her for a little longer."

"Voice recognition registers voice to someone named Chad, better known by his alias Soul Crusher. Surveillance footage places the car about thirty minutes away. Exact location sent to your phone GPS."

Soul Crusher. That was worse than Dr. Strange.

"I can make that fifteen." Bucky shrugs, setting down his fork and knife. If his hunch is right, the team didn’t really have to get involved. “See you guys later.”

“Do you want any of us coming with you?” Wanda gestures to the crowd at hand.

“I got it.” He pushes away from the table, depositing his plate in the sink, dropping an extra piece of bacon on the ground for Clint’s dog. “She’ll be alright.”

They watch him trail out of the room briskly, heading up to his room to change.

“Is it just me or is he too casual about this?” Clint continues staring long after he leaves.

“Both of them are weirdos.” Nat pulls open the newspaper again, going back to the sport’s section. “Who knows what goes in their heads.”

“Can confirm that not a lot goes on in his.”

Without Bucky to retaliate or grumble, a Steve walking into the room, sweaty and shiny after training becomes the new subject of jokes that morning.

__

For the first time in months, he’s had to bring a weapon or two along with him. Two revolvers and a couple of knives kept out of plain view. He wouldn’t need more than that anyway.

True to his word, it takes only fifteen minutes to get there, thirteen if he didn’t stop for the chain of ducks that crossed the street.

He’s also dressed in a little more leather than he usually reserves for your meetings. A jacket that brings to act as a windbreaker and tightly laced up combat boots make him look like he either stepped off a runway, or more menacing than usual depending on who was looking.

The GPS points him to an old warehouse near a more subdued part of the city. It was abandoned by the looks of it, and had been for a while judging by the lack of upkeep. Prime real estate.

He pulls off his helmet, hanging it on the handlebar along with his backpack before kicking the stand into place. The bike’s a few metres away just in case they decide to blow something up.

Bucky looks up at the warehouse, assessing the most damage he could do to it if at all it was needed. That thing could barely stand on its own, a grenade would absolutely decimate it. That wasn’t good news for you.

He sighs once before putting on his death glare, straightening out his shoulders into a stature that screams stone-cold, and pushes the door open, gun raised.

A mini-army of people ranging from their early twenties to late thirties stood guard at the entrance, all with rifles pointed at him. He counts fifteen, maybe eighteen.

“Oh, hell no,” a voice erupts from the back, followed by the sound of his gun being thrown to the ground. “No one told me that he was coming.”

Bucky raises an eyebrow, his death glare not shifting and Glock not lowering.

“I’m out.” The same guy raises his hands up to show he meant no harm, slowly brushing past Bucky as he squeezed out of the building.

“You got five seconds to leave before I shut this door,” Bucky gives the rest of them an ultimatum. Not like there was a point anyway. SHIELD was sending down some people to account for the one day rise in new morons. 

They all looked at each other, swallowing thickly before raising their weapons.

“I hope he’s giving you good insurance.” The second he finishes his sentence they all cry out in what sounds like a fucking war chant, launching themselves at him. 

______

“They’re here.” Someone presses his ear to the door as if the gunshots and screaming weren’t enough. 

“Brilliant. We’re ready.” Chad picks up the knife, running his finger along the sharp end. You try to see if you can use your Twitter-ordained powers of manifestation for a paper cut.

“How much are you asking them for?” You put forth a query instead, when it disappointingly doesn’t work.

“Asking who for what?” Chad stops his dumb intimidation tactic for a second. 

“You know,” you insist like it was obvious, “my ransom. How much did you ask them to pay?”

“We didn’t-” He looks around at the other people in the room for confirmation. “-we didn’t ask for any.”

“Because I’m invaluable?” Your head droops to the side in mock flattery. “Aw, you guys.”

“We didn’t think of it,” someone from the corner behind you speaks up, coming to the aid of their boss.

“Now that’s just rude.” You tut, shifting maybe an inch or two in your bounds to try and get more comfortable. “Leaving aside your lack of preparation, let’s just assume he bursts in here, desperate and ready to bargain. How much would you ask for?”

“Three million,” Chad says confidently, gathering a nod and sounds of agreement from everyone else.

“Are you serious?” Your jaw drops, a scoff escaping you. “That’s all?”

His self-assurance falters a little bit, you can see it under his 5 Minutes Craft mask.

“Three mill-” You stop mid-sentence. “With this wiring? Ridiculous. Make it ten, I demand it.”

“We’ll ask for fifteen mil,” Chad proposes, his teammates agreeing again, a little more delighted than last time.

“Ask for thirty, you coward,” you argued. “Thirty million and a jet.”

“You’re not worth that much.” The dipshit diagonal to you pipes up with his unwanted and, frankly, useless opinion.

“And you are?” You whip around the best you can. “Henchman number four?”

“Megedagik,” he informs, standing up a little taller now that he was given some importance. “It means ‘killer of many’.”

“Did you just say your name was Mega Dick?” 

“Megedagik,” he corrects.

You stare at him hard before turning away. “Alright, other than Mega Dick here, does anyo-”

A knife lands right next to your feet, driven at least an inch into the ground. You look up at the guy you managed to piss off within four sentences, his face now a beet red. 

“These are brand new, asshole,” you barked, shaking your shoes around. “You’re gonna pay if there’s even a scratch on it.”

“Permission to kill her?” Meg growls, casting a side eye at Chad.

The boss man looks at you thoughtfully, assessing the repercussions of what might happen. You raise an eyebrow.

“Slow and painful,” he settles. 

A small smirk makes its way onto your face. 

“Title of your sex tape,” you quip as the man in the corner storms towards you.

_____

It’s all a flurry, really. A bunch of inexperienced newcomers versus one of the most skilled assassins the world had ever seen? Ten minutes tops.

Bucky doesn’t do any serious damage. A couple of broken bones but only out of necessity, a lot of concussions, and maybe a bullet wound, or three, here and there. 

Most of the time he spends thinking about things that have absolutely nothing to do with what was going on. He forgot to take his laundry out of the machine. There was a biscotti recipe he had been procrastinating on trying. His succulents needed watering but he could do that once he was back. Was he wearing his good combat pants or was it the pair that had a hole in the pocket?

His left hand thrust outwards to shove someone away while he stuck his right hand into his pocket to check if it had frayed away. The person he pushed slams into a wall with a loud groan and no, his pants didn’t have a hole in them. 

He stops to take a breather, assess what was going on. There are bodies scattered all around, mostly writhing in pain from minor injuries. Someone very bravely stands up, hands posed in front of him in a regular fighting stance.

“You sure about this?” Bucky asks, reaching for one of the concealed knives he hadn’t had a chance of using yet. It twirls rather nimbly between his fingers for something so dangerous, the hilt finally landing in his palm for a sturdy grip.

The man takes one look at the knife before sitting right back down on the ground. 

“Good choice,” his voice drops to an octave lower than his self-esteem. He’s tired of this old routine but it works like a neat little party trick, often getting him the result he wanted. “Where?”

A few fingers point down the hall to the only room whose door was closed.

He makes sure to step over everyone who was lying along the way, ears tuned in to even the smallest of noises just in case one of them decided to attack him from the back. It doesn’t come.

He doesn’t bother creeping down the hallway. With all the ruckus that just went on outside, he’s pretty sure it’s obvious that they had an intruder. 

Bucky kicks in the large steel door with ease, given that it was barely hanging on its hinges. His gun’s raised, muscles tight, and senses on high alert for any immediate threats. 

It lands with a large thud, reverberating through the room. He’s reminded of your first meeting with him.

There’s a chair in the middle of the room with a person tied to it by a mixture of rope and tape. Others found themselves slithering around on the floor in a similar fashion, trying to get out of their bondages.

“Hey, James,” you call out, drawing his attention to you. You were sitting atop a table, legs swinging back and forth without a care in the world, a blade in your hand. 

“You okay?” He tucks the gun into his waistband when he realises that none of the henchmen are going to be going anywhere soon.

“All good.” You hop off the table with a little spring in your step. “Did you bring your bike? I need a ride back to the lair. I think I left the TV on when I was, you know, getting kidnapped.”

“You coulda teleported back home before all of this even happened.” Bucky does a quick assessment of your body to make sure there weren’t any bruises or anything of the sort. “Avoided the whole thing.”

“Don’t have the watch with me.” Odd, since he knows you consider it one of your essentials but it just fuels his theory further. “Besides, if I just quit before we started, they’d keep messing with me over and over again.”

“Do you want me to punch someone’s face in?” He glances around the room at the ones wiggling about on the floor like fucking worms. “I’d be happy to.”

“Nah, I got a few in myself.” You rotate your wrist, other hand still holding onto the knife. “You know what, maybe I’ll have another go.”

He simply makes a noise in acknowledgement before he places a hand on the hem of your shirt, gently reeling you back. “I think you fixed ‘em up real good. That’s enough for today.”

“Fine but only ‘cause you said so.” You huff, looking past him and at the weirdos on the ground. “You hear that? This man just saved your life. Say ‘thank you’.”

A muffled chorus of what sounded like appreciation echoed through the room. Bucky awkwardly looks around.

“Damn right.” You walk over to the guy in charge of the whole event, bending down to his level. “If you ever try to fuck with us again...”

You stare straight into his eyes, unblinking. You hold up the knife to his Adam’s apple. Chad doesn’t dare to move other than the thick swallow.

You raise your finger and flick him in the forehead. “Get a better costume.”

The corner of Bucky’s lip quirks upward.

“Let’s go, sarge,” you announce, standing upright again and making a motion to follow you. “D’you have an extra helmet I could use?”

“Yeah.” He had brought one along in his bag, assuming that you’d need one once he noticed the watch was missing in the footage.  

“Yay.”

The only storage space on his bike was under his seat and it’s just enough for an extra revolver. Clint asked him if it was his way of flirting with someone, give ‘em a quick spin around the city and then show them his gun. If looks could kill, Clint would be 7 feet under. 

“You sure you wanna ride it, though?” He cringes immediately when he realises what it sounds like, waiting for you to smack the innuendo in his face. “We could wait for SHIELD.”

“Don’t really have another choice, Bucky,” you say absentmindedly, strolling out the room as you tossed the knife behind you.

He frowns at your indifference but turns around for a second to look at Chad. The man in question looks back viciously, his grandeur from that morning basically deflated and left to die along with his reputation.

“Might wanna reconsider the name,” Bucky remarks, doing a quick sweep of the area once more. “Soul Crusher.”

He waits until both of you are outside the cell and the door is shut on the ringleader and his circus clowns, handlebar twisted out of place so that they don’t escape for the time being.

“One second,” he calls, touch gently lingering on your forearm to stop you without even thinking twice about it. A famously uncharacteristic move for him.

"Hm?” You don’t even look like you notice his action.

“You sure you’re good?” he asks seriously, actual concern slipping through the question. “Do you need medical assistance?”

“They couldn’t hurt me anyway.” There’s something strange about the way you say it, almost assuredly. “I’m good.”

“Okay,” he concedes, his hand darting back when he realises it was still on your arm. His eyebrows furrow when he realises how instinctively he had reached out in the first place.  He didn’t touch anyone, ever.

“What are we gonna do about them?” you inquire, stepping over someone on the floor to get to the exit.

“Marie told Agent Hill. They’re sending someone over.”

“They’re sending SHIELD for these wannabes?” Someone groans in protest from somewhere and you elect to ignore them. “Ew.”

“Just to make sure confidential information isn’t compromised in any way.” There’s a large bang that comes from the room they just left. Maybe one of them shot their teammate by accident. They were more than capable of doing it.

“I would never,” you exacted a little more solemnly, pushing the door open with your elbow to let the sunlight flood in.

“I know.” He doesn’t realise how dark it was in the warehouse until he steps out into the noon sun. “I’m pretty sure this is more about the fact that you were abducted.”

“For me?” The smile doesn’t quite reach your eyes the way he kinda likes. Something definitely felt off. “I love being class favourite.”

He doesn’t reply, a small grunt as he twists the handle of the warehouse door upwards, effectively jamming it. 

“Can I drive?” You bat your eyelashes at him innocently, disregarding the loud screaming that came from inside as those less injured probably regrouped for a last ditch attempt. 

“No,” he doesn’t hesitate in replying, handing you a helmet and buckling his own securely.

“But I just got kidnapped,” you complained, watching him swing a leg over the bike and straddle it. Okay then. 

“All the more reason for you not to drive right now.” He mentions for you to get on, squinting at the warehouse a few feet away.

“Fine, but next time I’m driving,” you grumble, climbing on the back.

“Do you even know how to?” His head is tilted to look at you from the corner of his eye, voice heavier on account of the obstruction on his face.

The door starts shaking violently and he knows for a fact that it won’t hold up for much longer. Some of those who he had knocked out probably had been shaken awake again for manpower. 

“I can learn.” You take a pause, mischief seeping into your next words. “You can teach me.”

“No.” He didn’t exactly practice what was considered safe, law abiding driving. He just got from one point to another and that’s all he cared about.

“Then I’ll do it myself.” You sound determined. “I’m going to leave a note for us in the lair.”

“You do that.” He revs the engine when something solid hits the metal door. As guessed, their usage of props to push it down faster was coming into play. “Now, can you hold on to something? We need to go.”

If only those idiots just realised that the windows covered by newspapers were right there, ready to be broken.

“Only if you promise to let me drive next time,” you say defiantly, drawing this whole ordeal out.

“Whatever,” he urges. “I promise. Now can we go?”

“Wait for it...” There’s a devilish smile on your face. “One.”

There’s a loud creak as the door finally gives way.

“Two.” The same people you left tied up in the room burst out, almost stumbling over each other in the process.

“Three,” he completes it on his own, not waiting for you to finish because God knows how long you’d stretch it out just for the drama.

Your excited screech of laughter as he narrowly misses a rod that gets thrown at him like a fucking javelin temporarily distracts him from the brain freeze he gets when your arms wind around his waist to hold yourself in place. 

There’s angry screaming and bullets that whiz past in an attempt to get him to stop but a swift turn around a corner, pulling the both of you out of their sight is enough to get rid of them. 

“We should get a few weapons and go back,” you yell over the wind rushing by, barely audible.

“You do that in your own free time,” he shouts in response, yanking you through narrower lanes and less popular streets.

“Maybe I will, you bore.” 

Still, you shut up for the rest of the ride, only grumbling when he stops the bike to tell you that no, you cannot let go just because you want to throw your hands in the air like in the movies.

You hop off when he finally pulls up on the street outside your lair, adrenaline still pumping through your veins. He waits patiently as you unbuckle the helmet, switching off the engine. 

“You gonna drop me off at my door too, now?” You snicker, fingers pulling off the helmet.

He looks at you for a second before dropping the kickstand into place and dismounting from the motorcycle.

“I was kidding.” You laugh, handing him your headgear that he shoves into his backpack. 

“You’re pretty capable of gettin’ abducted along the way.” An absurd notion, considering it’s a short path from the road to the door. 

“Oh, how chivalrous.” You let him tag along anyway, for his peace of mind. 

“My ma didn’t expect any less.” A couple of sharp lessons from Winifred Barnes and Bucky was nothing short of a damn angel. 

You knock on the door three times, crossing your arms over your chest as you waited. 

“Aren’t you the one with the key?” Bucky questions, one hand on his waist. 

The door swung open in the middle of his sentence revealing... you.

Another you.

“Nah, she has it.” Ex-Kidnapped-You raises your head in acknowledgement at Doorway-You.

“Ah.” He fucking knew it. An unnatural sense of smugness blossoms in his chest. 

“Hey,” the both of you said at the same time.

Doorway-You looked way more relaxed, a little less grimy and dishevelled but exactly the same.

“Buck, I see you met my other half,” the you from the doorway greets him. “Or other whole, actually.”

“Sure did.” He sends a glance at Ex-Kidnapped-You.

“You can go on in. Big first day, huh?” Doorway-You refers to the you beside him.

“You wouldn’t believe,” Ex-Kidnaped-You mutters, pushing past the entrance and disappearing inside.

“She gonna be okay?” His gaze trails after your clone.

“Oh yeah, just needs to recharge.” You turn around to make sure she’s fine. “She’s made of some pretty strong carbon, technically almost indestructible.”

No wonder ‘you’ said they couldn’t hurt you.

“Heya, sarge.” You draw his attention back to you. “Always good to see you.”

“Can’t really say the same about you.” 

“Ever the emotional repressor, Mr Barnes. I like this little leather show you got going, did ya wear it just for me?”

He shifts his balance to his other foot, feet slightly wide apart. “Take it that the clone machine finally worked?”

“I was in the middle of celebrating.” You sigh, recalling the events of that morning. “Teleported home for a second to get some champagne and when I came back she was gone.”

“Irresponsible.” He tsks, head shaking in disappointment. 

“Sorry I didn’t take amateur kidnappers into account for my risk factor analysis, Bucky,” you shoot back, pressing on his name for added annoyance. “Anyway, I did the responsible thing. I sent all the evidence I had to you guys.”

“Real clever.” Bucky looks at you in dry amusement. “Attack on the clone? Really?”

“Hey, always make time for a good pun.” You finger gun, lopsided grin on your face. “Did the team like it?”

“They thought it was a typo.” Or a code. He really had Wanda to thank for his big revelation. “Your video didn’t help either.”

“Don’t tell me they couldn’t make out it was me.” You laugh, crossing your arms over your chest.

He doesn’t reply, pursing his lip inwards in sympathy, but more so to conceal a smile.

The happiness drops from your face slowly, horror taking its place. “Don’t tell me they couldn’t make out it was me.”

“Good job, your machine worked,” he adds helpfully.

“C’mon, there were so many differences,” you whine, the success of your endeavour the last thing on your mind. 

“That is your literal clone,” he points out, only to see you- clone you- walk into the giant box in the corner of the room, bright green light emanating from it like a xerox machine.

“How could they not tell the original apart from a copy?” You look genuinely offended. Insane. “Not even Sam?”

“Guess you’re not unique enough.” A rise and fall of his shoulders signify his attitude towards this whole thing. “Think I like your copy better, too, actually.”

“You’re so mean.” You puff in disbelief. “I’m a 100% original. How many mad scientist teachers do you know?”

“Two.” 

“I don’t mean now, that’s not even the-” You poke at his rock hard chest. “You are so much more annoying than when I first met you.”

He thinks it’s good relationship development.

“I have to deal with you every weekend.” He watches your finger drop from his chest. “Picked it up along the way.”

“Boo hoo, talking like you don’t have deep, deep feelings for me.” You roll your eyes. “I see right through you, Bucky Barnes.”

“Can you see the part that couldn’t give less of a shit?” He gestures to himself. “It’s all of it.”

“You think you’re such a comedian, huh?” You narrow your eyebrows. “How did you know she was a fake then, huh?”

Busted.

“Probably ‘cause you didn’t talk as much today,” he dodges. “Actually had some peace of mind for a change.”

“You knew before you got there, you liar.” You push past his fabrications. “You figured it out before everyone else.”

“You literally put it in the title.”

“Yeah, but the rest of the team saw it too.”

“Rest of the team didn’t know you were building a goddamn clone machine for months.”

“You remembered that?” You pulled away, palm over your heart. “Oh, sarge, you paid attention to me.”

His nose twitches.

“You said it, like, eight hundred times.” He could use both his hands to count the number of references you had offhandedly made in the last three weeks alone.

“Why'd you go save me when you knew it wasn't real?” you continue to challenge relentlessly, knowing fully well that he was fibbing. 

“Because you fuckin’ peer pressured me. Had the whole team around me when you sent your little video during breakfast.”

“Just admit it,” you coo, ignoring all his justifications. “You noticed it was fake me right away but showed up anyway because you’re wildly in love with me.”

“No,” he says stiffly. 

“No as in you won’t admit it you have a crush on me, or no as in you didn’t know it was fake me?”

There was no winning this. 

“Good day to you.” He pulls the motorcycle helmet on to hide the expression that plain as day screamed the former of your two options.

“Also,” you bring up indignantly, “she even got to ride the fucking bike and I’ve been asking to drive it for months now!”

“We-” he chooses his words carefully. “-compromised.”

“Oh, you did?” Your voice lowers at the newfound information, interest piqued. “I’m gonna hold you to that then, whatever it is.”

“Doesn’t count.”

“Absolutely does,” you huff. “A promise is legally binding. Blue’s Clues taught me that.”

“Bye, Y/N.”

“You’re my knight in leathery armour,” you swoon, switching sides immediately, “Kinda.”

“See you next week,” he says in farewell, determined to leave before you made it worse. “Try not to get killed by then.”

“Why, so you can do it yourself? Protective much?” You pull him back when he starts walking away, laughing slightly. “Wait a second, you weirdo.”

He sighs, staying put anyway, arms crossed impatiently over his chest.

You pull out the pen tucked behind your ear and slowly tap him twice on each shoulder in a makeshift knighting ceremony. “For your sacrifice.”

He rolls his eyes at the ludicrousness, tongue clicking against the roof of his mouth.

You ignore his lack of enthusiasm, pressing your fingertips to your lips in a small kiss and then to his nose, given that it was the only part of his face you had access to.

“That was for your bravery.” You grin brightly at him and he sure as hell is glad he’s wearing the stupid helmet because he can feel his cheeks light up a bright crimson.

“Thanks.” His voice sounds gruffer than a second ago. He clears his throat.

“Now you’re my knight in leathery armour,” you fawn, nearly falling over yourself dramatically. “Let’s ride into the sunset together. I love you.”

“You’re ridiculous,” he calls out over his shoulder, turning away to return to his bike. “I despise you.”

“But you don’t.”

He really didn’t.

also i managed to fuck my phone up really bad so all proceeds from my ko-fi go towards getting it fixed

Next part

#bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #mcu fic #bucky fic #bucky barnes fic #bucky fluff #bucky barnes fluff #bucky angst #bucky barnes angst #harmless fic #winter soldier x reader #Winter Soldier #bucky barnes #bucky

[writingfics-passingtime]

Playing the Part

~8300 words of steamy Loki tickle fluff

PG13 for this one, kids. Lots of making out.

CW: some swearing, suggestive humour, mentions of murder/death, alcohol consumption

Every job has its ups and downs, and every employee their good days and not-so-good days. You’d hardly classify yourself as an employee because you didn’t get a paycheque, your entire occupation was a hazard unto itself, human-resources was punching it out on the sparring mat and your boss was either a 100-year-old super soldier or an eccentric billionaire, depending on the day and who was wearing what suit.

Wait… should I be getting paid for this?

Looking around your room that you paid no rent on, in a multi-billion dollar superhero compound, you decided that wasn’t a question you were ever going to ask. The question of the hour was which dress would best conceal your thigh-holstered gun.

Today, your job entailed one of those tasks that could be fun if you decided it would be, or hell if you had a bad attitude about it. You prided yourself on always being up for any mission, so that answered that question, though infiltrating some black-tie gala undercover was never as exciting as fighting alien forces.

You gave up feeling guilty about being a little excited when Earth faced threats long ago; no one had to know that impending planetary destruction was your favourite kind of mission to help out on.

Selecting a red strapless dress from the middle of your mission closet (which was differentiated because most of these dresses were bulletproof) you slipped it on over your underwear and thigh holster. A knock came at your door as you were reaching behind yourself to zip it up.

“Come in!”

“Agent, we- oh… Oh.” Loki’s featured turned from surprised to playfully smug in a matter of seconds.

“Can you get this zipper?” You winced at the stuck metal. He nodded and approached, you turned and held the fabric up. Before he even made it halfway to you he gave a brief wave of his hand and used his magic to unstick the zipper, bringing it to the top.

“Thanks,” you smiled, familiar with that particular kind of help from Loki. “Can you see my gun?” You did a little spin and he shook his head. “Great. You look nice," you commented, gesturing to his impeccable black suit.

“As do you.”

“Ready?”

”I suppose there are worse charades to play on a Saturday evening. Ones that don’t include fine wine and the prospect of a tussle with a Midgardian security man.”

You shot him a look as you two walked towards the garage together. “You said no Midgardian wine could be classed as fine.”

“Save for one region in Italy, I’ve discovered.” Loki shrugged, tightening the fastener on his cuff link.

You gave him a mock look of shock. “Are you telling me… you were wrong?“

“Smugness is not becoming, Agent,” Loki playfully warned.

“Hmm,” you narrowed your eyes. “Looks like I’m spending too much time with you.”

You bickered and bantered good-naturedly as you entered the garage, which was more like a hangar but only for cars. This mission would be you, Loki, Natasha, Sam and, strangely enough, Tony wanted to drive the van. He gave some excuse about wanting to test some new equipment and spend time with his team. Though you knew it was because Pepper wanted him to attend her aunt’s seventieth birthday, and Tony had a long-standing feud with that particular aunt ever since she went on a forty-five minute tirade about how much she hated Led Zeppelin. You weren’t sure if it was the sentiment behind it, or the fact that she could talk for forty-five minutes straight without the awareness to stop. Either way, Tony was on the job tonight.

“Black Widow is already onsite,“ Tony handed you three some photos as you entered and took your seats. “Your names are on the door, fake ones obviously, here they are.” Tony pulled up some information on the screens and then commanded the self-driving van to go with a few taps at a holographic control centre.

You went over the plan, the objective, who to avoid at all costs, where the gun was supposedly hidden. There was a gun used in a murder of a journalist - the employee of an old friend of Tony's, a young guy working on an exposé of a filthy-rich family dynasty in New York City. The journalist was sure the McDane family money came from arms dealing, but he was found dead just a few short months after he started investigating. The following week, Charles, the charming and likeable newly-married eldest son of the family, announced his run for mayor.

Whether Charlie McDane ordered the murder, or if he didn't even know it happened, Tony's source said this family kept trophies of their victories and the murder weapon would most definitely still be in the house.

On the face of it, it was an unusual assignment for the Avengers. If you didn't think that hard about it, you could have just sent Nat in alone. However, the McDane family was even more powerful than they loved to show on the surface, and this wouldn't be a simple theft. Hence, a small team was going in to avenge the fallen journalist.

Natasha had been planted on the inside, posing as an event manager for a soirée the family was hosting to celebrate Charlie’s birthday and, since he’d invited everyone in the political and social scene, it was the perfect chance to enter the mansion; there’s no way he’d know who each and every person was and should be.

As you walked down the road with your arm slotted through Loki's, you eyed the metal detectors at the front entrance. You gripped his arm and slid your hand into the pocket of your dress, but the pocket was hollow and only existed as easy way to grab your gun. Wordlessly, you passed it to Loki and he concealed it with his magic in the exact same way you planned to smuggle the murder weapon out later that evening.

Maybe it was Loki's elegance or your years of training that started when you were very young, but the way you two could instinctively weave around each other's thoughts, ideas and actions without so much as a glance was something special you didn't take for granted. You both had keen senses, but there was some kind of unexplainable energy that made them align perfectly.

You never let your mind wander on nights like these. On missions. Perhaps if you were less professional you'd take a moment to fantasise about what it would actually be like to go to a party with Loki. If the way he led you through the room with a gentle hand at your waist was more than a ploy to look like an adoring couple, or if he knew your favourite wine because he cared, instead of just having heard you order it a million times before.

He kept things light with jokes and little jabs, never once crossing a boundary when fake-flirting with you, but it wasn't lost on you that it was unusual to have this kind of working relationship that had all of the chemistry with none of the awkwardness. It was almost as if it was second nature now for him to pull you a little closer when you were in a nice dress, considering you'd only worn them in front of him on missions. And so he did pull you closer as you approached the bouncer to give your names.

You spied Nat at the front, leaning around a security guard's shoulder to point to something on his list. She always played her parts so well. She stole a glance at you and Loki through her fake glasses and that was it. No indication she knew you, no special treatment, no way she'd do anything to blow this. She walked up the outdoor staircase as you gave your aliased names to the guard and flashed fake drivers licenses that were pretty much real, considering the government had created them.

Loki declined the arrival champagne for the both of you, immediately leading you to the bar. You looked at him as if to remind him that you weren't here to drink, and his subtle smirk replied that he didn't care. He ordered two glasses of a merlot from the one region in Italy that'd won his respect, passing the glass to you once it was laid on the bar.

"To the finer things," he cheers'ed your glass and you scoffed with a laugh, taking a sip of the wine. The rich flavour burst through your mouth. It was dark and deep, spiced with... with... "Cedar," he offered, reading the analysis on your face. "Rosewood, cedar and some sort of stone-fruit."

"Nectarine."

He smiled and took another sip. "We don't have that on Asgard."

"This wine is good," you nodded as you two turned and deconstructed the room and all of its guests.

It made you kind of sick seeing all of these wealthy people in one place pretending to give a damn about Charlie McDane's birthday. It's not that you liked the guy, not at all, it just felt weird to know that every person in here was the exact kind of person you hunted down. Power-hungry. This mansion may as well be a lion's den. But full of naïve lions, who had no idea two apex predators just walked in.

Just when you started wondering how many people in your line of sight had also committed murder to protect their wealth and power, you saw Natasha give a subtle signal of which way the room with the safe was. Loki saw it too.

It was upstairs, but there wasn't much cover to get upstairs. The great foyer's ceiling was three stories up, the two floors above the ground floor you were on had square balconies that let the people upstairs peer downwards into the masses. Nat's fingers adjusting her hair told you that the room was on the second floor. Thankfully, there were guests on the second floor. Under the guise of admiration for the architecture and a desire to explore the great house, you pointed out works of art to Loki as you ascended the stairs together. When you walked past Natasha she smiled politely, like a good host, and asked if you were enjoying the wine.

"It's most divine. Though, I believe my beloved may be in search of a room to powder her nose."

You would have rolled your eyes at his usual choice of asking for information if you weren't aware that security's eyes were everywhere. Even on the event manager.

"You might find what you need up the stairs, down the first hall, third door on your right."

The way her hands were motioning didn't match her hushed description, so you followed the instructions in her voice instead of the way her hands were telling you.

You allowed Loki to lead you upstairs, down the first hall. When you two were certain there were no eyes, he concealed you two with his magic. The hallway was darkened. He pressed his hand against the lock and unfastened it with an unseen pure magic and you two slipped inside. It was a large office with grand mahogany furniture, decorated exactly as you'd expect Old Money Americans to decorate their office. Right down to the bear head above the fireplace and the first edition novels sitting proudly on the shelf, probably unread by their owners. That also made you a little sick: great words sitting unread as trophies.

Scanning the room for any obvious signs of the safe, your eyes settled on a panel in the wood on the side of the desk. There was a slightly smaller gap in the wood on one side, indicating hinges. You held your hands up to Loki and he conjured thin gloves to grace your fingers, then you pressed gently on the wood to engage the latch. The panel swung open to reveal the safe. Shifting out of the way, Loki took your place and placed a gloved hand on the dial. In less than three seconds, it spun rapidly in each direction before clicking open.

"We should really consider robbing banks," you whispered as the black metal door swung open and you were met with stacks of paper and envelopes.

"Need I remind you I am a Prince? If it's gold you want, darling, say the word."

"Eh," you shrugged, feeling around for the gun. "I meant more for the thrills."

Loki chuckled as your fingers found a familiar-feeling package. You pulled the envelope out and peered inside before showing Loki the sight of a small pistol. He nodded and took it from you carefully, then concealed it in some unknown magical space close to him.

You closed the safe carefully and then your gloves disappeared. Moving quietly back to the door, you listened for several moments to make sure no one was coming. Then, you both slid out and began walking down the hall like a loving couple.

Suddenly, a guard appeared at the end of the hallway. Thinking fast, you opened the closest door to you and pushed Loki inside. There was a shout you vaguely heard before you shut and locked the door again.

"Shit," you hissed. You were in someone's bedroom. Or maybe it was a guest room, considering how clean and un-lived-in it looked. There was a fireplace, like in the office, and a large four-poster bed against one wall. In the middle of the room were two plush couches that faced each other and were side-on to the door. You two walked over to them to get the vantage of being in the centre of the room and quickly searched for an exit.

"I'll cast an illusion," Loki whispered, ready to wave his hands and make it look as if you two weren't here.

"No!" You whispered, eyes wide. "They already saw us come in here. If we disappear, they'll know something's up and lock the place down."

"Then what do you propose?" He held his hands out, annoyingly unbothered by the prospect of blowing a mission. The doorknob twisted and you both snapped your heads towards it, then back at each other.

"Sit," you hissed and shoved him back onto the sofa right behind him. He stumbled and fell with a small indignant noise of surprise. You heard the tinkling of keys and your heart beat in your chest.

"Agent?"

Knowing the security team was about to enter, you acted fast. "I'll never hear the end of this," you mumbled before sliding forward to straddle his lap. His eyebrows shot up his forehead as you wrapped your arms around his shoulder and looked at him with nervous urgency. "Kiss me."

Loki didn't question it, and he certainly didn't need to be told twice. His hands found their place. One at the small of your back, one firmly gripping the hair at the nape of your neck. Then, he pulled you in for a fiery kiss.

You barely heard the door open as you lost yourself in the strength of his hold, the steady and eager grasp with which he held you. His hands found their places as if they'd been there a thousand times before, as if he knew exactly how you'd feel the safest, feel the most desired. You pulled him deeper by the back of his neck and could have sworn he made a small noise of satisfaction.

Oh no.

He kept kissing you, you kept kissing him, even after the head of the security team had cleared his throat a number of times. As much as you knew you'd already sold it, and boy you sold it well, you couldn't bring yourself to pull away. Were all Asgardians this good at kissing, or was it just Loki?

Oh. No.

"HEY!"

The sudden loud command pulled you away and, much to your internal mortification, you didn't need to feign how flustered you were.

"O-oh my," you squeaked and looked up at the man, blushing profusely.

Okay, the squeak was fake, but it felt almost real.

You stayed put where you were straddling Loki's lap and grimaced when you saw Natasha, still in character, entering the room. "What's going on, I need you downstairs to- oh!" She looked a little taken aback by your position atop the prince who, you were fuming to see from the corner of your eye, had the audacity to be smirking.

"My apologies," Loki drawled in his growly regal voice, trailing his hands around to your sides. "I simply couldn't control myself, seeing my queen in this dress..." He punctuated it with an "Mmph" and a firm squeeze at your hips. You flinched and squirmed a bit under the ticklish touch, trying to keep your composure but letting a small giggle slip out. Then, catching the pleased and mischievous glint in his eye, you dug your nails into the back of his shoulder to warn him off trying that again.

"This room's off limits," the guard tilted his head towards the door and you made to move your way off of Loki's lap. Instead, with his incredible strength, he stood with his hands still at your hips, lifting you to your feet before turning and wrapping an arm around your waist.

He looked the guard up and down, "Of course, good sir." You bit your lip and blushed, cowering in Loki's hold as you exited the room together. Nat smirked at you and winked before proceeding to fall back into character and tell the guards there was a belligerent drunk man downstairs needing to be kicked out. That man would be Wilson, who was playing his part as tipsy distraction.

Loki led you down the hall and you rounded a corner, then you broke off from him and held a hand to your chest. "That was too close," you breathed deeply once, then met his eye. You glared when he saw him smirking at you.

"Do I have lipstick on my face?" He asked, feigning worry.

"Oh, shut up," you swatted his shoulder. "I did what I had to do."

"I never knew you had the passion in you, Agent," Loki smirked again. You glared once more and peeked around the corner, only to jump and hold in a yelp as Loki's pinching fingers found your hip. "I also never knew you were so ticklish."

"That's not something people advertise- cut it ouhout!" You swatted his hand and squirmed away from him as he prodded his fingers into your side. "We have the gun, let's get out of here."

"Tsk, you're no fun," Loki scoffed.

You exited the party and made your way down the block towards the van, knowing that Nat's glasses had broadcast at least the last part of your little tussle with Loki. Steeling yourself as you gripped the handle, you reminded yourself that you were a professional, and this was sometimes a hazard of the job. You needed to play it cool when the eventual teasing came.

"Hey, lovebirds," Tony quipped the second he saw your faces.

"Hey," you chuckled, stepping inside and removing your heels the second you found your seat. "We got it."

"Here," Loki closed the door behind him and pulled the enveloped gun from the magical space he'd hidden it. "So you saw the Agent's display of passion, did you?"

"You wound me, Loki," you deadpanned. "I thought we had a mutual connection."

Perhaps those words were a mistake considering all the truth behind them. However, all the best lies were founded on truth, and for now you needed to convince everyone in the van that you weren't totally freaking out because you'd felt the most passionate attraction you'd had in years with a former villain. I mean... how predictable.

Loki looked at you suspiciously as he took his seat, but something in his gaze told you he wasn't going to prod deeper on this. Not right now, at least. Not in front of everyone.

Nat and Sam joined the fray five minutes later and you all got a move-on back to the Compound. Nat poked more fun at the position she'd found you two in, and you laughed good-naturedly at all their jokes. Loki was uncharacteristically silent, and seemed to always be looking at you when you laughed and instinctively checked to see if he was laughing too.

The jokes shifted to Sam and the wine he spilled down his shirt, then the conversation shifted to the next steps of what to do with the gun, then you all arrived back.

Tony got to work dismantling his rig, declining your help, and so you took your field weapons over to the cabinet to put them back in their places. As you were unclipping the magazine from your pistol, you felt a presence behind the door. You peered around to see Loki.

"What's up?" You raised your eyebrows and snapped the case shut, then closed the door.

He looked at you meaningfully, quizzically, but didn't say anything.

"Okay..." you chuckled uncomfortably and put the latch on the door in place. "I'm going to shower."

You made to walk past him but he grabbed your upper arm, stopping you by his side. Facing different ways, he leaned in a little closer and spoke quietly. "I can spot a lie from lightyears away."

Turning to look at him, you'd probably have been caught off-guard by how close his face was if it hadn't been for the events of earlier. You shrugged, pulling your arm from his grasp. "I didn't lie."

He scoffed and also turned to look at you, eyes flitting once down to your lips, then back up to pierce your gaze with his. "You know what I meant."

You were proud of how composed you kept yourself when you shrugged again and kept walking, swallowing hard.

This wasn't supposed to happen.

Never one to waste water, you took an uncharacteristically long shower. Haphazardly smearing face wash over your skin to scrub the makeup off, scrub away the flustered energy. But no amount of scrubbing could help you forget the feeling of his kiss, and shampooing the hairspray from your head only made you remember the feeling of his fingers in your hair.

You reminded yourself that it had been a very long time since you'd kissed someone. You were probably just desperate, definitely a little touch-starved in general, so the fact that it was Loki didn't matter as much as the fact that it had happened.

That's what you told yourself over and over as you threw on sweatpants and a soft long-sleeved shirt. It was cold and the marble floors could be unforgiving, so you thought it best to go for fluffy socks, but then pulled some slippered boots over the top. You didn't bother brushing your wet hair, letting it fall where it wanted as you made your way to the kitchen.

"That smells good," you commented as Nat pulled some dish out of the oven.

"Mmm," she agreed with an excited smile. "Nico is my favourite," she admitted slyly, referring to one of the chefs Pepper would call in to prepare a bunch of heatable meals during busy periods. Delivery app drivers would probably cancel the order if you tried, thinking it must be a joke that a super solider was asking for a Big Mac to be delivered to the Avengers Compound. Besides, by the time it was scanned and made sure to not contain a deadly poison, it would be cold and stale. "There's enough for you too," Nat said, pulling out another plate and serving you a steaming slice of vegetarian lasagne.

"Thanks," you smiled, still a little distracted. Of course, with someone as perceptive as Nat, that wouldn't be allowed to slip by.

She leaned against the counter and poked at her meal, not meeting your eye to keep it less direct. "You alright?"

"Hmm?" You looked up, and so did she, then you looked back down to your food and shrugged. It was no use lying to her. "I think I'm lonely," you laughed humourlessly, nervously, sadly.

"The kiss got to you," she said knowingly, placing her fork down to give you her full attention. You didn't return the favour, nervous about what you'd say if you were really talking about this. Which, as long as you were here eating dinner, you weren't really talking about it.

"It's not like I haven't kissed a fellow Agent before to keep cover," you sighed a little, shaking your head. "It's just been a while, I guess, since I've had... anything... or, someone."

"I get that," she nodded, picking up her fork again. You two ate in silence for several moments. "This is really good," she declared through an extra-large mouthful. You chuckled and nodded, swallowing another bite. After several more moments, she said quietly, "It's okay if you felt something."

That made you choke a bit. Noticeably, unfortunately. You shook your head, but didn't deny it. "No. It's not okay."

"Why not?" She asked as if you were crazy.

"It's not okay," you repeated firmly, stabbing your fork again at the lasagna. "It's not."

Before she could attempt to pry for more information, Thor and Loki entered the kitchen together. Great.

"Good evening," Thor beamed a toothless smile.

"There's more in the fridge if you're hungry," you looked up at them in an attempt to not seem as regressed in on yourself as you felt. Thor looked at your plate and nodded in approval, opening the fridge. Then you looked at Loki, fully expecting to see some kind of calculating stare as before, but his expression was soft. He looked you over, probably noticing your out-of-character hunched posture and the way your head hung a little lower than usual, and he gave you a look that was subtly laced with sympathy.

Now that made your blood boil. Who was he to feel sorry for you?

He seemed to notice the way your jaw clenched under his gaze, and opened his mouth to say something but Thor spoke first.

"There's a film Stark wants us all to watch this evening."

Nat chuckled, finishing off her dinner. "You say that like he's showing us training videos. He's just trying to bond the team over some cheesy nineties movie." She looked at you and nodded to your clothes. "You look ready for a movie night."

Before you could explain that you'd rather go to bed, Thor beamed again. "Excellent, then! We'll all be there."

Thor was always kind to you, so you didn't want to disappoint him over something so inconsequential. You smiled warmly at him and nodded. "I'm gonna go claim a good spot," you excused yourself, aware it was almost time for it to start. You quickly did your dishes and left the kitchen, making sure to get a seat on a large armchair so you made it clear you'd rather have some personal space right now, even though it was the exact opposite of what you wanted. Maybe it would be good for you though, to remember that you were alone for a reason. That this life you chose wasn't kind too love.

Gods, love. Why did you think of that word, of all the ones out there. You were spiralling. Sentiment, you corrected yourself with a swift reprimand. Sentiment, loneliness, desperation.

You busied yourself chatting to Wanda as people filtered in, taking note of how she seamlessly wove herself in and around Vision as they sat on a two-seater next to you. Determined not to look at or think of Loki or romance or kissing or anything like that, you trained your eyes on the screen as the movie started.

But you spiralled.

There were these two main characters in the movie with this undeniable bickering co-worker chemistry that reminded you of Loki, the jokes he’d whisper into your ear during meetings, the harmless mischief he’d pull to make you laugh, the way his hand felt at your lower back- NO. You couldn’t think about that.

Wanda and Vision were in your line of sight from the corner of your eye and you saw her fingers lace through his, you then saw him place a silent kiss on the crown of her head. Biting down on your tongue, you remembered Nat and Bruce, Pepper and Tony, Thor and Jane, Clint and Laura. All those people who seemed to find love, even temporary love, in the midst of all this madness.

So maybe it wasn’t this life. Maybe it was just… you.

Biting your tongue a little harder, you reminded yourself how powerless you were compared to all these super-people. Sure, many of them were human like you, but all the other humans seemed to have someone who loved them.

It felt hopeless, knowing the only person in this room who you wanted close was so extraordinarily out of your league. He was a god. You were a human. Your life was a flicker compared to his, of course he’d never waste time indulging the likes of you.

But it felt real.

Halfway through the movie you decided you couldn’t sit there and see these buddy-cop characters fall in love. You couldn’t watch Wanda and Vision so enamoured with each other. What you needed was to hit something hard, and then go to sleep. So you excused yourself without a word or a glance at anyone. It was late, anyway. You weren’t even the first one to leave.

A turn of a black-haired form told you that Loki noticed you leaving, but the lack of footsteps behind you as you walked down the silent hall told you that he hadn’t followed you.

Slipping into your room and then into some workout clothes, you jammed your headphones into your ears and put on some classical music; you weren't sure you could stand to hear any words right now. You laced your shoes a little tighter than normal and practically sprinted to the gym, very unwilling to have anyone notice you were gone and decide to come check on you.

Hitting the bag felt good. It was the perfect consolation prize for what you'd actually prefer right now, but with every crushing of your knuckles against the thick canvas you found it easier to forget how it felt to have your fingers looped through his hair. The sweat dripping down your face replaced the feeling of his breath against your skin when you'd broken the kiss, and the aching in your obliques from your tensing and turning to hit the bag took the place of any memory of his hands at your waist. The aching was here, and he was almost gone.

After a half-hour of interval sprints, it was just past midnight and you were exhausted. Not knowing how you felt about no one coming to check on you, you traipsed back to your room in silence. The faint echoing of your footsteps through the hallways made you quiet yourself further, stepping as lightly as you could to prove to yourself that you were still a good spy. Good spies don't get caught up with feelings. Your footsteps fell, dead quiet, and you regained some confidence.

Your muscles stung the next morning but in a delightful way. You'd treated yourself to another hot shower when you got back to your room, so this morning it would probably be best to have an icy one.

As the cold water hit your skin, you felt okay again. The boxing and running last night had really shaken everything out of you, only the smallest lingering of lonely desire remained and it could easily be ignored. Of course, that was easy to say. The second you walked into the kitchen to see that Loki had heard you coming and poured you a coffee you felt a tug at your chest.

His hands closed around the mug to pass it to you and you remembered how his fingers had closed around your waist. He smiled good morning and you remembered how his lips felt against yours. Holding it all in, you smiled and took the coffee, then proceeded to have a short conversation with him like a normal person would. He made jokes about last night, but not about that, and you chuckled at them. After perhaps too short a time for how long you usually chatted, you excused yourself to go do some paperwork. You caught the way his brow furrowed a little, but he didn't question you.

The next few days were more or less like this. You'd try to engage with Loki normally but spiral a little more, convincing yourself that the more you continued like you always had, the more normal things would be again. But he was just so... beautiful. Everything about him was beautiful and now you couldn't help but notice.

One evening, nearly a week after you'd kissed, you were having a bit of a vulnerable day and you walked into the kitchen for some ice cream. Loki had just finished cleaning up after his dinner and turned to say hello, but you couldn't do it. You just turned and walked right back out again. He called after you but you didn't stop. It's not like you were going to cry in front of him, but you just couldn't do this right now.

Seeking refuge in your bedroom, you shut the door and slid down to the floor with your back against it. An immediate soft knock frustrated you, especially knowing who it probably was. You sighed and stood.

“Hey,” you greeted Loki with a nod when you opened the door, immediately turning away to make it look like you were about to do something else. “What’s up?”

Loki stepped into the room and closed the door behind him, which made you stop and give him your attention. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” you lied.

He squinted for the faintest second and smiled a little sadly. “Light years,” he reminded you how he could spot a lie without harshly calling you out. It pained you that he didn’t. That his lack of sarcasm indicated that he saw you as a bit fragile right now.

You sighed a little and ducked your head to the side, conceding the point. “I’m a little haywire,” you admitted. “I think I need to get some stress out and go to sleep.”

”What troubles you?”

Ah. What a question.

You didn’t want to shut him out, but you certainly didn’t know how to explain that one simple kiss undercover had brought a massive crashing wave of insecurity and anxiety that made you feel completely unlovable. Or... maybe you could just say that?

You were silent for so long that Loki spoke again.

“I’d like to offer my apologies,” he said very diplomatically. “If I overstepped the bounds of our relationship.”

“I’m the one that made you kiss me,” you winced. “I should be apologising.”

”I didn’t mean that,” Loki shook his head. “I meant after, when we returned. When I cornered you.”

You had to laugh. “You didn’t corner me, Loki. I appreciate you wanting to make me feel better but you have nothing to apologise for.”

”Very well. But you didn’t make me,” he replied firmly.

“I know, I know…” you rolled your eyes. “A god submits to no one, I just meant that I put you in a situation that I shouldn’t have. Believe me, I’m paying the price.”

That last part came out a little faster than you’d intended it to. In fact, you didn’t really mean to say that last part out loud at all. Or maybe you did. What a perfect Freudian Slip. Quickly collecting yourself, you spotted your headphones and went to pick them up but noticed that Loki was taking slow steps towards you.

”Paying the price?” He asked carefully. You stopped and folded your arms, shrugging.

“People poke fun, you know.” You bit your tongue. Then, you saw him smirk a little. Ah. Lightyears.

“I thought we had a mutual connection,“ he raised his eyebrows, teasing you with your joke from That Night. You gave him a firm stare, but couldn’t help but notice he wasn’t that far away now.

“Loki, that was-“

“A thinly veiled truth,” he interjected, leaving no room for debate. He also left very little room between the two of you. You opened your mouth to respond, seemed to not be able to, and he smirked at your speechlessness.

"Y-you can't." You shook your head. "There's no way."

"There's no way, what?" A smiled tugged at his lips at the way your eyes widened when he took a strand of your hair and wrapped it once around his finger.

"... Mutual?"

“Now that we won’t be interrupted…” he brought his hand up next to his face, flourished it, and you heard your door’s lock click shut. You held your breath as a mischievous grin graced his lips.

Oh gods, you were looking at his lips. You couldn't seem to look away.

He lowered his voice to a gruff whisper. “Might we finish what we started?”

With the smallest nod of your head, he immediately ducked his head to press his lips against yours. Your small noise of surprise made him pull away for a second and grin, before he playfully growled and lifted you from the ground. His eyes stayed trained on yours as he walked a few steps and firmly shoved your back against the wall. Your breath hitched as his hand found that place at the back of your neck, and this time, you kissed him. Eagerly, hungrily, feeling so overwhelmingly euphoric that this was even happening.

It had to be a dream, you thought as his lips trailed along your jawline, his hot breath hit your neck and his strong unwavering arms kept you above the ground and level with his gaze. He kissed you not just like a god or a great lover - he kissed you like he wanted you. Like he‘d also been waiting to do this for an unspeakable amount of time. It felt like relief.

Pulling you both back from the wall, Loki's lips didn’t relent as your fingers tangled once again in his hair. He walked backwards and found his seat on the end of your bed, sitting with you in his lap as he had at the party.

“Gods, you enrapture me,“ he pulled away, a little breathless. He grinned and his eyes were hazy. He looked at you intensely before looking back at your lips, subconsciously slipping out his tongue to wet his own. Before you could respond, he was kissing you again. You could have melted into his touch. In fact, you were fairly certain you just might.

He leaned back and you both fell onto the bed, you on top of him. You laughed at the sudden impact and you pulled away for a few seconds to catch your breath. You looked at his adoring gaze and blushed. “I never thought someone like you could want someone like me.”

He furrowed his brow, unsure if you were about to reference his nefarious past.

”You’re so… mighty. You’re a Prince, a god, you’re wickedly smart and powerful and… and I’m just a human.”

“Watch your tongue,” Loki scolded somewhat seriously and held you a little tighter. “Don’t speak of yourself as if you’re insignificant.”

You rolled your eyes and smiled, giving him a look. “You know what I mean.”

“Of course I do, I’m wickedly smart,” he smirked and you playfully swatted at his chest. He smiled contentedly and ran his hands firmly down your sides to settle at your hips. It was an innocent romantic gesture, one to position you for further making-out with Loki, but your eyes widened at the memory of his discovery the previous weekend and the assumption that the God of Mischief was about to turn the tables.

Unluckily for you, your flustered expression rendered it a self-fulfilling prophesy.

“Loki…” You warned as you saw the glint in his eye.

“That’s right…” His smirk widened to a devilish grin.

”How about you keep kissing me, huh?” You laughed nervously and leaned in closer. Loki laughed and nodded, bringing his hand up to cradle the back of your neck as you pressed your lips to his. Once your arms were around his neck, he deepened the kiss and rolled over, putting you underneath him. Still on the edge of the bed, your feet barely skimmed the floor. Then, he suddenly became the classic Loki you knew.

“Mmmhmhm!” You whined and giggled a little into the kiss as the fingers belonging to his arm around your waist started ever so gently scratching at your side. “Mmnnoho!” You broke away and gave him a pouting look. He lifted his head and smirked.

Gods. He’d never looked so unspeakably hot.

Messy curls framing his face, that look he gave you that said You’re In Trouble in his distinct Loki way, mixed with the desire in his piercing blue eyes; you’d gladly endure his torture if it meant he looked at you like that.

But maybe that’s because you had no idea what was coming.

“Darling,” he cocked his head and kissed your cheek before kissing just below your ear. “I am the God of Mischief….“ he kissed your neck in a way that you were sure was intended to tickle. You giggled and bit your lip. “And now that I've got my hands on you, you simply cannot expect me to not exploit this little weakness to its fullest extent.”

“L-Loki!” You blushed at the very real threat and he chuckled.

“How about you guide me, hmm? Where should I start?”

“I’m not playing this game,” you laughed nervously, squirming a bit underneath him and resting your hands on his shoulders to push away the ticklish kisses.

“Aw, come now,” he lifted his head and that same beautiful smirk made your heart beat quick. His hand behind your neck slid down under your shoulder blade until it sat at your upper ribs. You stole a glance down to where it may be, even though you couldn’t see it. He cocked his head again. “No? Alright, I’ll choose.” With a wink his thumb slipped around the side and up into the hollow under your arm.

“LOKI!” You gasped, clamped your arm down from instinct and immediately started squirming and giggling, even though his thumb wasn’t even moving. He grinned again and kissed your lips once more.

“You've been down all week, love. Let's have a bit of fun,” he whispered, then sprang his hand at your waist into action, scratching and grabbing at the soft skin hidden beneath your shirt. You gasped again and started laughing softly, then squeaked when his thumb started wiggling into the hollow under your arm.

"NOHOHO!" You shut your eyes and then squealed loudly when his fingers underneath you began clawing into the back of your uppermost ribs. Damnit, you thought he may start easy on you, not go for three different places at once. You were already in a desperate cackle, bubbling incoherent pleas spilling from your lips as you writhed underneath his amused self.

"I'm honestly delighted you're so ticklish," Loki teased with a chuckle. "It's adorable, really. So professional all the time, yet..." He finished his sentence by intensifying his touch and speed at all three sites of attack, drawing a small shriek from your laughing lips and a jolt from your body. "Has it always been this easy to undo you?"

“OHMYGOHOD!” You shrieked, throwing your head against the bed and trying to buck your upper body against him to no avail. He paused his torture and kissed you deeply again, lips curled into a smile as he pressed his lips to yours. You shook your head and broke away, still laughing. “Youhou’re ridiculous! We were hahaving such a nice moment and y-you ruined ihit,” you whimpered. He kissed to again to silence your complaints.

“What did you expect?”

“I-I expected a nice romantic moment!” You laughed and brought both arms between you and him to shove at his shoulders. “Now,” you gave him a stern look. “Do you want to tickle me, or kiss me? You can only choose one.”

He scoffed. “I don’t do ultimatums, darling.”

“You do now.”

“Bold.“ He stuck his tongue against his cheek then ducked his head to the side in consideration. He then looked at your face, which you’d been attempting to hold in some semblance of a firm glare. He lowered his lips to your ear and you heard him chuckle once. “Far too bold for someone so ticklish.”

He whipped his arms out from under you and pressed his weight down again, trapping your arms between your bodies as he clawed into the front and sides of your lowest ribs.

“NOHOAHAH!” You immediately fell into desperate belly-laughter as his fingers drilled and clawed into the spaces between your bones. Your feet kicked helplessly, merely grazing the ground as laughter kept spilling from you. “NOHO! NO! LOKIHI I CAHAN’T!” He shifted his hands further up your ribcage and snuck his fingers around to dig in at the back and, after one more shriek, your laughter went silent. It was trapped in your chest as his squeezing and vibrating fingers found every sensitive space on your ribs that made you want to melt into a little puddle. You were gasping for air by the time he halted his attack, squeaking and wheezing as you tried to regain your breath.

It was torture, but you hoped he wouldn’t ask you if it was worth enduring to have him this close. If he could spot a lie from lightyears away, how much easier could he spot it when he was close enough for you to see the flecks of green in his eyes.

”You’re… you’re gonna kill me,” you hiccoughed. He smirked and leaned in for another kiss. “Nuh-uh,” you pulled your finger up as much as you could from where your arms were trapped. “You made your choice.”

He grinned and slid his hands down your sides with a wink, "Oh? Then I'll gladly continue."

"W-w-wait! I dihidn't th-WAHAIT!"

His thumbs drilled relentlessly into your hips as Loki joined in with your loud laughter. You finally managed to wiggle your arms out from where they were trapped at your chest, shooting them down to grab at his fingers. Your feet having no traction and his near entire weight pressing you to the bed made it impossible to buck or lift any part of your torso, so you were completely trapped with nowhere to go as he gripped and grabbed at the skin of your hips, kneading at the pressure points that made you squeak and squirm beneath him.

When he tired of your fingers trying to grab his, he did a devilish swift lift of his own body and slotted his hands between the two of you, settling them palms-down over the majority of your belly. You made a huge gasping noise and started frantically giggling and squealing even before he'd moved his hands. You shook your head and begged for him to kiss you instead, nervous high-pitched giggles interlacing your words.

"N-noho, Loki just kihiss me, kiss me plehease! PLEASE!" You squeaked, cupping his cheeks and gently pulling him towards you. He chuckled and grinned, gently digging a few fingers in just once. You thrashed and renewed your struggling and squealing efforts. "Dohon't you DAHARE! I won't kiss you agahain if you do this!" You threatened. He cocked his head and leaned in a little closer to look deep into your eyes. Then, he grinned and whispered:

"Lightyears."

You thought for certain you'd pass out from laughter when Loki's fingers sprang into action and rippled against your hypersensitive stomach. You laughed loudly, completely powerless to stop his fingers from digging in wherever they pleased. After not much time at all, your laughter went silent and you weakly batted at his shoulders, sides, face, anything your hands could find for themselves since your eyes were shut so tight. Any words your brain even began to think of forming got lost as laughter ripped through your chest from the electric intensity of his fingers against your body.

When your hands finally found both sides of his face, you used all the energy you had left to press your laughing lips against his and, finally, he relented. You fell back with a loud gasp as he retracted his hands with an amused chuckle and took his weight mostly off you, propping himself up with a hand planted either side of your head.

"Alright there, darling?" He teased as you coughed weakly and wiped the tears of mirth from your cheeks. You gave him a scowl, but he found it adorable.

"Thihis isn't fair," you crossed your arms defiantly.

"No?" He smirked. "Pray tell, my love. What isn't fair?"

Oh. My love. His love.

That took any breath you'd managed to get back in your lungs.

"Y-you... you..." But your words were lost in the bliss of being his. He seemed to quickly understand how his words touched your heart, and it softened his teasing demeanour, and softened his smirk into a smile. "You found my worst spots so soon," you managed to murmur through rosy cheeks.

"Was only a matter of time."

"But now you have the upper hand."

"Dear heart, this isn't a struggle for power," he laughed heartily. "I do not seek to rule over you. Anything you ask of me, anything in the Nine Realms, I will give to you."

"Tell me where you're ticklish."

He chuckled and pressed a chaste kiss to your lips before falling down beside you. He hummed in contentment as he wrapped his arms around your waist to pull you as close as you could be.

"Anything but that."

#loki x reader #loki fluff #loki tickle fluff #ler!loki #ticklish!reader #marvel tickle #marvel fluff #marvel reader insert

[a-edgar-allan-hoe]

The Last Chthonian

Bucky x Reader, Sam x Reader, Zemo x Reader

Part 1

Author’s Note: Had this idea living in my head rent free so hopefully I don’t butcher it.

Summary: Imagine being Hekate, the Greek goddess of magic and witchcraft, the night and the moon, doorways and crossroads, creatures of the night, and ghosts and necromancy. You stumbled upon Earth many centuries ago and since then have resided on the foreign planet. During the recent years you created an alias for yourself to hide your true identity, and after the war against Thanos you chose to live out your days in the Scottish countryside, until a certain trio appear at your doorstep one day.

Warnings: language

Part 1 , Part 2

“So, where are we going again?” Bucky asked Sam, confusion written on his face as he leaned back in the front passenger seat of the car.

“You’ll find out. We’ll be there soon.” Sam answered, his eyes glued to the road and hands gripping the wheel.

“But we’ve been driving in the middle of nowhere for an hour now.” Bucky fussed while staring at the never ending green grass that passed by, clearly irritated with Sam’s lack of details.

“I too would like to know where we are going.” Zemo spoke up only to add to Sam’s annoyance.

“YOU don’t get to ask questions.” Sam glared at Zemo through the rear view mirror before staring back at the road. He was starting to get fed up with their questions and lack of patience.

The three men had been driving with their windows down for what felt like hours through the Scottish countryside, watching the green highlands pass by. Though they admired the beauty of the landscape, they were extremely anxious to stretch their legs and get to their unknown destination. Not to mention, they were starting to get a little hungry as well.

“Are we there yet?” Bucky broke the silence after some time.

“We get there when we get there.” Sam snapped, his knuckles turning white from gripping the wheel a bit too hard. He was really looking forward to getting out of the car and away from those two.

After a short while they neared a small seaside village. The place was not that busy, save for the few locals and fishermen going about the cloudy day.

Sam drove on a little further before finally reaching a quaint stone cottage that sat on a hill at the edge of town, overlooking the ocean. He pulled up next to the 60s convertible cream colored Volkswagen Beetle that had a surfboard tied on the roof, parked next to the cottage. Sam took the keys out of the ignition and stepped out, stretching his legs as the others followed suit.

Sam smiled to himself as he walked up the path leading to the front door and glanced upon the flower garden and the decorations out front. He knew for sure this was your place. The other two quietly followed behind while looking around the residence, from the neatly kept garden and the vines that crawled along the house, to the fishing equipment hung up on the side, down to the handmade birdhouses and the wind chimes and sun-catchers that clinked melodically against the ocean breeze, including the collection of garden gnomes. The place reminded the men something straight out of Jane Austen’s novels, not that they’d like to admit they knew such a thing.

Sam stopped at the front door before turning to the others with a pointed finger. “Now whatever you do, don’t stare.”

“Wait what?” Bucky scrunched his nose.

“Just don’t.”

Sam paused for a moment, thinking of how to explain this situation to you before tapping on the wooden door. No answer. Sam could feel Bucky glaring at the back of his head, ready to scold him about how this was a big waste of time. So he knocked again, this time calling out if any one was home.

Before Bucky could open his mouth there was rustling coming from inside and the sound of someone knocking into furniture before a faint “ow” and “fuck” of a woman’s voice made Bucky and Zemo glance questioningly at each other. Where the hell did Sam lead them to?

The locks on the door were fumbled with before opening up to reveal your head poking out from behind.

“Sam?” You breathed out. You were slightly out of breath and your hair was disheveled with strands falling out of your bun at the front from under your silk scarf. The sleeves of your button up blouse were rolled up at your elbows, revealing your dirt covered arms. You were working on your vegetable garden in the back before you were interrupted by your unexpected visitors.

Bucky stood behind Sam and couldn’t help but widen his eyes when he saw you. He only met you a few times during the threat of Thanos and before, but the interactions he had with you were very brief. All he knew was that you were a good friend of the Avengers, especially Thor, Clint, Nat, Wanda, Tony and Steve and now apparently Sam. But after Thanos was defeated you disappeared and nothing was heard of you since.

Zemo glanced out from behind Bucky and tried to remain hidden behind the super soldier once he recognized your face. You weren’t exactly an Avenger and you weren’t on Earth when he tore the Avengers apart, you were helping Thor at the time and little to everyone’s knowledge, you were also defending your planet against an inside threat. But you had heard of him through your friends, and though you hadn’t met him, Zemo knew you would strangle him once you spotted him.

“Hey y/n.” Sam smiled at you, calling you by your alias name. He knew who you were through Steve, but even then, he didn’t know everything about you and about the recent events that took place in your home planet that still devastated you.

“What the hell are you doing here?” You asked with a mixture of surprise and annoyance, wiping your hands on your apron. There was a reason you chose to live all the way out here, and though you gave Sam your new address, you didn’t expect him to bring company.

“I came to see how you were doing?”

“Bullshit.” You scowled, crossing your arms over your chest. “If you wanted to check up on me you wouldn’t have brought someone.”

Sam opened his mouth to speak but decided against it, refused to meet your stern eyes and looking down at the ground instead with his hands in his pockets. He often forgot how well you were able to read people, almost as if you were telepathic. Little to his knowing, you were in fact a telepath but decided against telling him. You’ve known people who became uncomfortable when finding that detail about you and noticed how they tried to avoid you, constantly guarding their thoughts when around. If only they knew you never bothered to do such a thing because you respected their privacy and because you’ve seen things in people’s heads you wished to forget. You’ve only ever used your telepathy when it was absolutely necessary. Straightening up, you finally took a better look at the other man behind him and instantly recognized him as Bucky.

“Barnes?”

“Hi y/n.” Bucky smiled shyly at you as he looked into your eyes. And that’s when he noticed for the first time that your eyes were different from when he last saw you. Your irises were now a shade of purples and blues with flecks of gold that spread out, a reflection of the stars and the universe. So that’s what Sam meant when he said to not stare. But could you have just been wearing contacts? Bucky’s stare was cut short as Sam noticed, glaring at him and clearing his throat before elbowing him in the stomach.

Suddenly, there came the sound of a little girls squeals coming from inside your home, startling the men except for Sam. And before they knew it, a small girl in overalls who looked to be of 6 years of age sprinted through your legs and out the door. “Uncle Sam!”

“Oof! Athena wait!” You gasped against the impact as you tried to reach for her.

“Hey hey little Athena!” Sam smiled as he picked the excited girl up into his arms before setting her on his hip. “How’s my favorite little warrior?”

“I’m helping Mommy with the garden! See!” She squealed in delight before showing off her dirty hands.

“I can see that.” Sam chuckled. “Looks like you’ve been working hard.”

“God, I’m so sorry Sam. She’s covered in dirt.” You tried to apologize with an embarrassed face.

“Hey no worries.” Sam smiled at you. “Some dirt is not gonna kill me.”

“Mommy who’s this?” Athena questioned as she looked at the man next to Sam.

You looked at Bucky and gave him a look that questioned what name he would prefer, to which he nodded and mouthed Bucky to you.

“That’s Bucky sweetie.”

“Hi Bucky! I’m Athena!” She stuck her tiny hand out to for him to shake, a big grin plastered on her face from meeting new people.

“It’s very nice to meet you Athena.” Bucky smiled as he gently shook her hand, making her giggle.

The scene made you smile to yourself as you pushed a strand of your hair behind your ears. Maybe it wasn’t so bad that Sam and Bucky decided to pay a visit.

“Mommy who’s the man in the back?”

The man in the back? You looked to Sam and James with a raised brow before craning your neck to see who the third guest could be, only to tense up and clutch the door frame, forcing yourself to not go over there right now and throw him off a cliff.

“What the hell is he doing here?” You glared daggers at Zemo as he watched you with caution, before you turned to Sam.

“I can explain.” Sam tightened his jaw as he saw your expression.

“Athena, sweetie.” You turned to your daughter with a gentle smile. “I want you to go up to your room and clean up okay?”

“Okay mommy.” Athena looked back at you with a worried look as Sam set her down.

You caressed her head as she walked in, watching her go up the stairs and waiting for the sound of her bedroom door to close and her shower to turn on before shutting the front door behind you.

“Are you out of your goddamn minds?” You glared at the two, trying to not yell, your fists balling up in anger. “What in the three hells is going on?”

“Look y/n. He might be of some use.” Sam tried to explain.

“So you broke him out of prison?!”

“Well technically he got himself out.” Bucky rubbed the back of his neck. He was starting to think that this wasn’t such a good idea and felt guilty for coming here.

“Oh? So what? He magically decides to join your little boy band? The Wakandans are after his ass in case you haven’t noticed.”

“Look I get it. Working with Zemo sounds like a terrible idea and you have every right to be upset. We just need a place to lay low for now. Just...hear us out.” Sam responded with a pleading look.

You stood there with a hand on your hip, squeezing your eyes shut while you pinched the bridge of your nose, not even caring that you still had dirt on your hands.

“Please y/n.” Bucky spoke up, making you look up at him. “Sam wouldn’t come here if he didn’t know what he was doing.”

You looked between the two, rubbing your chin in contemplation as you thought everything over. Bucky was right. Sam would never try to purposely put you in harm’s way.

“Fine.” You breathed out. “You can stay for the night. But you are going to tell me everything. Every last detail.”

“I promise.” Sam looked to you as he placed a reassuring hand on your shoulder.

“Well come on then. Get in.” You nodded your head towards the door as you opened it, letting Bucky and Sam in before putting yourself in front of Zemo and blocking him with a threatening look while speaking in a cold tone. “I swear to the gods, if you so much as try anything, I will bury you alive in my backyard and use you as fertilizer to grow fungi.”

“Y/n what the fuck.” You heard Sam utter from inside.

Zemo gave you a bewildered look and decided to keep quiet as you stepped aside to let him in, watching him closely as he went in. You stuck your head outside again, looking around for any bystanders and making sure the men were preoccupied before muttering something in Ancient Greek, waving your hand around and moving your fingers in specific gestures as a clear glass like film covered the area around your home for protection. You did another once over before going back in and closing the front door, readying yourself for the conversation you would have with Sam and Bucky.

#zemo x reader #Helmut Zemo x reader #helmut zemo #zemo x y/n #zemo imagine #zemo fluff #zemo x oc #zemo fanfic #zemo x ofc #zemo x f!reader #zemo x female reader #bucky x f!reader #bucky x y/n #bucky x you #bucky x female reader #bucky fluff #bucky x reader #bucky imagine #bucky fic #bucky fanfic #bucky barnes #bucky x original female character #bucky x oc #sam wilson x you #sam wilson x oc #sam wilson x y/n #sam wilson x reader #sam wilson fanfiction #sam wilson imagine

[dameronology]

questioning {natasha romanoff x wlw reader}

summary: natasha had always been able to appreciate women. once she meets you, it becomes clear why {for @stephanieromanoff​ - for some reason i can’t answer your ask but i hope u enjoy this}

warnings; probably swearing?? and mentions of the usual mcu canon typical violence

this is actually my first natasha imagine on this blog which is...wild. because - and i’m sure many people relate - she was my bisexual awakening and i still would let her top me. enjoyy!

-jazz

Sexuality was fluid - Natasha knew that.

She’d just never considered her sexuality to be fluid.

It was funny, really. Natasha had witnessed many forms of beauty in her time as a SHIELD agent; beautiful men, beautiful women, beautiful people. She could appreciate a good-looking human when she saw one but it never extended beyond admiration. Most of her Red Room training had been centred around seducing men. Her friends had always set her up with men. It wasn’t so much that she’d rejected the idea of anything other than heterosexuality but she’d always just kind of...assumed. 

Besides, it wasn’t like Natasha’d ever even been in a position where she’d been close enough to a woman (or anyone, for that matter) to ever consider them in a romantic way. Her job didn’t allow for it - not unless the person she was with was also in her line of work. And, with all due respect to her colleagues, she knew them far, far too well to ever consider the notion of dating one of them. 

Life has a funny way of working out though, doesn’t it? 

You were dropped into Natasha’s lap when she least expected it. It was a cold, rainy Monday afternoon and she was in the staff room at the Compound with Steve. They were sat in comfortable silence, scrolling through their phones. The peace was disrupted by the sound of a crash, followed by a string of curse words.

‘What the...’ Steve stood up, approaching the hallway outside. 

That was the first Nat saw you: with coffee halt spilt down yourself, your bag strewn across the floor and cheeks bright red. It was quite on brand, really. 

‘I am so sorry!’ You dropped to your knees, quickly scrambling to pick the papers up. ‘I was too busy trying to find my office and I went straight into the door frame.’

The first thing Natasha noted was that you were pretty. Not pretty like the girls she’d seen in windows in Amsterdam, or pretty like the slender models she’d seen in London. You were...sparky. Talkative, and bright. There was an energy about you that she was yet to see in anyone else.

You were terrifying too. Not a single person at SHIELD had witnessed someone telling a dad joke whilst throttling a man twice their size, but there was a first time for everything. 

At first, Natasha was convinced that her feelings towards you were simply admiration...for a friend. Because you were friends, right? It was hard not to become close to someone when you spent every second of every day with them. She never thought much of it, though - you were also close with Steve, Sam, Wanda and Bucky. Nothing about your relationship with Nat was different from your others. 

There were a few notable exceptions on her part. She could tolerate you more than anyone else - and that was just the way she worded it in her head, to convince herself that it didn’t mean anything. In actuality, she found herself seeking you out, trying to spend to time with you. She’d do paperwork in your office until the small hours of the morning, and she’d bring you coffee when you both returned to work a few hours later. Natasha had never had a best friend before and it felt good.

‘Do you ever think about relationships in our line of work?’

You looked up from your paperwork, glancing over at Nat. She was sat across from you at your desk, the dim glow of your spotlight illuminating her face. It wasn’t unusual for her to bring up deep subjects when it was late (in this, case it was 1AM). You ponded for a moment, tapping your pen against the edge of your desk. 

‘Sometimes.’ You said. ‘I mean...I wasn’t an Avenger until five months ago, give or take. If I did get into one now, I imagine it would be much more complicated than when I was normal.’

‘You are normal.’ Nat reached across the desk to whack your shoulder, smiling to herself. ‘At least by Avenger standards.’

You chuckled. ‘Honestly, I barely have time to think about relationships now, let alone get into one. My ex-girlfriend asked me if I wanted to grab a coffee and the earliest date I could do was in four months.’

That was the first time Natasha realised that whatever chemistry and easiness was between you, it could have been something more than friends. The sound of the word girlfriend coming out your mouth? It...well, it made her mind go places. No-where drastic, or revealing. It just made her think; the idea of you casually referring to her as your girlfriend in conversation gave her butterflies.

And Natasha Romanoff did not get butterflies. At least not until now. Not until you.

‘How did you know that you liked girls?’ She asked. It was a casual question - one you’d been asked plenty of times.

‘I just knew.’ You shrugged. ‘It’s not the same for everyone, though. Sometimes it takes meeting the right person.’

That was the statement that got Natasha thinking. She’d never even considered the idea of liking girls, not until you’d come along. 

She couldn’t help but let herself day dream - it was a guilty please, in a sense. What would life be like if you were together? What would it be like to call you her girlfriend? To live with you? Natasha was so vehemently against the idea of domesticity...but with you? Maybe it wouldn’t have been so bad. She didn’t even realise how (for lack of a better word) gay her thoughts were. And when she did? It hit her like a train. 

Natasha had dealt with a lot in her life - aliens, nazis, gods, genocidal robots, evil super spies. It made the situation seem so mundane; she’d become so exceptionally aware of her mortality that things like questioning her sexuality or pondering on her attraction for her best friend just seemed like a waste of time. She’d always been fearless, after all. It had kind of been forced into her nature at the Red Room, and even more so after becoming an Avenger.

It was during another late night conversation that Nat realised her feelings might have been deeper than she realised. She knew that she liked you in a way that ran far deeper than just being best friends; it was just the extent that she was unsure of, and she didn’t want to make a move until she understood it properly. It was like being on a mission really: do some recon, get a better gauge of what’s going on and make a move. 

She hadn’t expected it - it had been nine words. One completely casual sentence. Nothing out of the ordinary. Just a conversation. 

‘I saw a TikTok that reminded me of you.’

It was in that moment that Natasha realised, whilst staring at you across your desk with wide-eyes, that she was in love with you. It was a brand new (and not entirely surprising) discovery but it didn’t feel like a shock. The feelings had always been there - it was just the sudden comprehension of them that came as a revelation.

It didn’t have to be complicated. Missions to Russia to take out HYDRA bases were complicated. Teaching Steve and Bucky how to use an iPhone was complicated. This was....well, it was simple, wasn’t it? She loved you. And maybe, just maybe, you loved her too.

Aside from the fact you were just friends, you might as well have been a couple already. You ordered take out together every night and ate it together on the sofa. You drove to work together, and you had a thousand and one inside jokes. The foundations were there but neither of you had ever been all that good at architecture. 

‘It reminded you of me?’ Natasha quickly regained her posture, offering you her signature smirk. ‘I didn’t realise you thought of me outside of work.’

‘Nat.’ You snorted. ‘We hang out after work every night.’

‘I know, I just...’ She trailed off. 

‘You just what?’

‘We should get dinner tonight.’ Nat cleared her throat.

‘Wasn’t that the plan?’ You raised an eyebrow at her. 

‘No, I mean...dinner.’ She sat up a little straighter (ironic). ‘Like a date.’

‘Are you asking me out?’

‘Yeah. Why?’

‘I...’ it was your turn to be a little speechless. ‘Yeah, okay. Let’s do it.’ 

#natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff imagine #natasha romanoff fic #natasha x reader #natasha imagine #black widow x reader #black widow imagine #avengers x reader #avengers imagine #avengers fluff #avengers smut #avenegers preferences #marvel x reader #marvel imagine #marvel fluff

[druigswhores]

what died didn’t stay dead

(originally posted by vormirjumper)

dedicated to @starsvck and @artipotter hope u enjoy this <333

summary: the last thing you remember was fainting in wakanda thinking you saw your own fingertips turn to dust only to wake up in a world where natasha romanoff no longer existed. inspired by marjorie by taylor swift

content warning: natasha romanoff x fem!reader, set after endgame, angst, mentions of death, trauma, their relationship ending on a bad note, trust issues & previous steve x nat, (WANDAVISION SPOILERS AT THE END)

‘моя любовь’ = ‘my love’ in russian <3

REQUESTS ARE OPEN! (please lmk if anyone written something similar to this! & if you want more nat content lmk!)

masterlist

PART TWO

You forced your eyes open.

Pulling yourself up from the ground you glanced at your arms in confusion. You swore you saw your own hands turn to dust before fainting. You glanced around to take in your surroundings eyes widening in shock as you saw the hundreds of Wakandan's you fought beside minutes ago appearing out of dust. You stared speechless as you watched people materialise out of thin air, the dust forming into fingers, then a whole hand and eventually becoming a person who's mirroring your exact reaction.

You felt guilty about the first thought that came across your mind.

'Is Nat okay?' You panicked while rushing to look around, ignoring how you spent the last few years loathing her to hide your heartbreak.

You were an avenger since the beginning. The two of you were on the same team during the airport fight which wasn't surprising due to your history together. Despite the slight age difference between the two of you, your personalities worked well together which is why you got along well, so well in fact that those platonic feelings you thought you had for her developed into something more and somehow you found yourself in her bed many times in her arms with your bodies pressed against one another's, struggling to catch your breath, bliss written all over your face. Your legs were intertwined with hers as you embraced the warmth radiating off her. You refused to acknowledge the unspoken tension in the atmosphere due to the fear of speaking out about your feelings and end up ruining what you had. You couldn't help but let the insecurities build up as you gently caressed her cheek, her eyes met yours back in adoration, full of what could've been love.

But you knew she once looked at him in the same way.

"I love holding you in my arms моя любовь." She muttered, as she stroked your hair gently, you hummed in response, not trusting your own voice. What you both had felt right, you didn't want to ruin it, you didn't want to label what you had together due to the job you both have. Being an avenger doesn't exactly mean stability, anything could happen.

You remember the panic you felt when Ultron took her, the chance of losing her filled you with dread, but you also had faith. You knew how strong Natasha was. Your faith gave you strength and it kept you alive, Nat admired that about you.

The two of you fit together well, whether it was on the field or outside of the field. You could predict each other's moves and although telepathy isn't either of your powers, you know what the other was thinking. You made her better. You helped her wipe out the red in her ledger and when everyone's files was exposed to the globe you were right there by her side comforting her as she feared the reaction from everyone. You were there for her when nobody was and you stood by her side no matter what. Those feelings were reciprocated, you knew Natasha would've done anything for you.

She would even sacrifice herself for the possibility of you coming back.

Then the Accords happened and Nat betrayed the Accords, ending up on the run with Steve, Sam, Wanda and Vision. You were left alone at the compound with an injured Rhodey.

"How could you do this?" You spat out, voice full of hatred as you watched Natasha let Steve and Bucky get away. Your pistol shook in the palm of your hands, pointed directly at Natasha who lowered her own onto the ground, allowing herself to be defenceless.

"It's not that easy моя любовь, you out of all people should understand that." She explained, and you scoffed in response. The pet-name which once caused a flutter in your stomach now fuelling the fire that's building up. All the insecurities you felt during your relationship suddenly turned to hatred. You should've expected this, you should've expected that after all this time she would've chosen Steve over you.

"I guess you'll never change." You responded flatly, admitting defeat. You silently walked passed her and climbed out of the rubble that was created, allowing a wall to be in between the two of you not knowing you tore a piece of her heart as you did so.

That was two years ago.

You thought you'd never have to see her for a long time. You hoped you wouldn't have to see her. Clearly things never go the way you wanted it to go as you found yourself staring back at the person who once owned your heart.

"Well, you guys look like crap." Rhodey teased, wrapping the fellow avengers in his arms as you stood to the side, awkwardly watching the scene in front of you while fidgeting with your fingers. The atmosphere in the compound was comforting, it's been a long time since you've heard so much laughter in one room despite the war that's brewing.

Natasha, who was now blonde but as gorgeous as ever, hesitantly approached you. The two of you stared at each other, waiting for the other to make the next move.

"Romanoff." You nodded, greeting her before moving away to greet the other Avengers, missing the way she muttered the now bittersweet name she specifically picked you.

"моя любовь..."

Did she really love you? Or was it just for revenge? You believed that love blinded you, you managed to convince yourself that your love wasn't enough for her and that's why she left you. Your relationship with her died. It was over. You thought you buried it all, all your feelings. But you were wrong, when your eyes met her green eyes all those feelings came back to life, flowing through your veins.

After all this time you still loved her.

But your feelings for her weren't the only thing you couldn't bury.

Within an hour of reuniting with the Avengers, the team found themselves on the quinjet travelling to Wakanda. You wouldn't have said this out loud but you had faith that everything would be okay, Nat was finally by your side after all these years.

You felt as though nothing could go wrong.

That was a couple hours ago you estimated, you glance at Wanda who appeared a couple feet away from you the tears were evident on her face.

"Where is he?" Wanda cries out, clenching her fists, you saw the scarlet red energy glowing around her. You knew she must've been talking about Vsision who should've been on the ground next to her. "Wha- why does everything look different?" You realised, noticing the damages caused by the battle has disappeared. The grass was greener as ever. The corpses of the creatures you fought were no longer on the ground.

It looked as though the battle never took place.

You ran over to Wanda, helping her up from the ground when you hear someone call your name out. "That sounds like Sam." Wanda points out as the two of you held each other up.

"Wanda!" Sam called out.

"Come on, we gotta go! They need us! The fights not over yet!" He shouts from a distance, the two of you made your way to the direction you heard his voice come from, you saw all the superheroes surrounding him and a man in a red cloak. "What about Nat? Or Rhodey?" You questioned, looking for them in the crowd. You missed the sympathetic glance the man shot you before waving his hands up in the air, creating a yellow ring in the air that transformed into a portal.

"We're going to fight beside them right now." Sam confirms before flying through the portal.

The compound was completely destroyed. Your home was crumbling apart. Thor looked completely different, Tony had grey hair and Natasha was nowhere to be seen.

You wanted to finally tell her, tell her that you loved her with all of your heart.

You fought beside hundreds of Avengers that day, but you couldn't help searching for one specific Avenger. You ran over to Clint who was on the ground struggling to fight off a bunch of creatures, saving him within moments.

"Thanks kid." He pant, out of breath from all of the fighting. You smiled at him in response, reaching your hand out for him to take which he gratefully took, lifting himself up. "Have you bumped into Nat on the battlefield yet?" You asked, hopeful. There were hundreds of people fighting so you didn't expect to find her easily. The smile on Clint's face fell.

In that moment he relieved everything that happened moments ago. Flying to Vormir with Natasha, climbing the cliff with her, reminiscing about Budapest. And the way he witnessed her body hit the ground, the crack echoing so loudly he managed to hear it more than just once. He glanced down the cliff and saw her lifeless body faced towards his.

His closest friend. The person he trusted with his entire life. The person he named his son after. The Godmother of his kids.

Gone.

Just like that.

"I need to do this for her Clint, she's моя любовь." Nat whispered to him before smiling back at the oldest friend she had, pushing away from the cliff and inevitably falling to her death.

You found out what happened to Natasha, hours after.

The Avengers won, but at the cost of the lives of the people you cared the most about, the person you'd do anything for and the person who owned your heart the minute you met them. Clint broke the news to you, he felt as though you deserved to hear it from him.

"She loved you till the very end." He finished after explaining what happened on Vormir. You felt as though you couldn't breathe, like your soul was crushed and pulled away from you.

Natasha Romanoff was dead and there was nothing you could do about it.

She never got to hear that you felt the same towards her.

"I didn't think the ending to be so soon." You struggled to hold back a sob, holding the letter Clint gave you tightly in your arms. Scott somehow found a letter on the ground while trying to save Clint, it was slightly damp and covered in mud. But it was written for you in Natasha's handwriting.

You couldn't bring yourself to read the letter even nine days after the blip. You had to live in a world without her, a world where people drag her name through the mud even though she is the reason they're still standing. You adjust to a world without Natasha Romanoff and reading a letter she wrote for you months ago wouldn't help.

You regretted everything. You regret spending those last few years in anger, you should've stayed with her, you could've told her how much she meant to you. You could've told her you loved her, you could've held her in your arms once more. You would do anything to have her in your arms once again.

Sometimes it felt as though she was still there, laughing at something she saw on the TV. You always felt her presence around you after she passed away, it felt as though she never died. It felt as though a part of her lives through you.

You sat in the passenger seat of Wanda's car, staring at the Sword logo plastered on the side of the building, you could feel the letter in your back pocket, dying to be read. Wanda made her way back to the car, face flared in anger, tears threatening to spill.

"Wanda?" You called out as she got into the car, turning on the ignition but not pulling out of the car park. She sniffled quietly, wiping her eyes before glancing back to you. "I saw him." She responded, her eyes glancing to the folded paper on the backseat of the car, she could see the faint colour of red that was in the shape of a heart. "But they're not letting him have a funeral." You realised, looking back at your friend, heartbroken. "I figured at least one of them deserved a funeral, it's not fair. It's not fair that the world can just go on like nothing happened and we don't get to mourn the people we lost." Wanda rants, pulling out of the parking lot and beginning to drive.

"They both deserve a funeral." You agreed solemnly, remembering the fact that Natasha's body is at the bottom of a cliff in space in 2014.

"Where are we going now?" You asked, wanting to distract yourself from that thought. You felt as though you and Wanda were left to mourn your loved ones alone as the rest of the avengers scattered across the country.

"To the only thing I have left of him."

The two of you sat in silence as Wanda drove, you stared at the shrubbery outside the window before closing your eyes and resting your head on the window, allowing yourself to drift off.

It felt like it was only seconds later when you felt the car turn harshly, you opened your eyes and glanced around in confusion when you saw that you pulled into a quaint town, you had only just missed the town sign plastered with the words "West View." You watched the pedestrians walking by, noticing how some of them sat on their own with no one to comfort them similarly to you and Wanda.

The two of you pulled up to a plot of land with the foundation of a house on the ground, it looked at though the house never had the chance to get completed.

"Stay in the car, I won't take long." Wanda reassured you before reaching towards the back of the car to grab the folded up sheet of paper and getting out of the car. You nodded, staring at the built house next to the plot of land.

Your mind wanders as you stare at the home. You think about Natasha. You think about the future you could've had with her, living together in a quaint home like the one in front of you. No stress about being an avenger, just the two of you and your family. You softly smile as you imagine Natasha's reaction to wanting to adopt 5 cats, knowing she was more of cat person. You imagine holding her hand while walking down the street and watching movies with her in your shared bed. You wanting to stay in for the day and watch movies to ignore the real world outside and her letting you.

You think about what could've been.

A heart wrenching scream snaps you out of your thoughts, you rush out of the car and look for Wanda but is blinded by a scarlet red light that knocks you unconscious.

Your eyes open on command.

The room you stood in was black and white. It was a nicely decorated living room with a dining room connected to it, you couldn't pinpoint which decade the interior was from, too preoccupied by the woman standing in front of you.

Although the lack of colour in them, you could recognise those eyes from anywhere, that smile that you've wished to see was right in front of you. The dress she wore matched the decade and decor of the room, her hair curled up neatly. Natasha stood in front of you, reaching her hand out towards you waiting for you to take it.

You hesitantly reach out towards her, happiness flooding your emotions. She pulls you closer to her, welcoming you into a hug. The palm of her hands are warm as they rested on your back, you could feel her heartbeat as you laid your head on her chest, melting in her arms.

"Welcome home моя любовь."

#natasha romanoff #black widow #marvel #avengers #mcu #marvel fanfiction #avengers x reader #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff imagine #black widow x reader #black widow imagine #marvel imagine #natasha romanoff angst #wlw fic #natasha romanov x reader #black widow x female reader #black widow x you #natasha romanoff x you #avengers endgame #wanda maximoff #wandavision #Wanda maximoff #wandavision spoilers #wandavision episode 8 #Wanda vision #Wanda vision spoilers #scarlett witch #vision #tony stark #westview

[sweater-daddiesdumbdork]

Attack Of The Winter Wolf: Salvaging The Lost

Summary- 6.3k Alpha Steve x Little One Reader. Your old pack has been torn apart by the Winter Wolf and Alpha taken. Steve and You rally the last together and offer then a home with you, some take the offer, others don’t. Steve and You prepare to go elsewhere though. A part of Steve’s past might have the answers needed. Divider made by @firefly-graphics​

Warnings- Mentions of blood, death, smut- fingering. 

A/N- Thank You for reading and following along with Alpha Steve and Little One. It means so much to me that their story is read. I hope you all enjoy. It is a slightly slower chapter. As always, thoughts, questions and theories are always welcome. Happy Howling. 🐺💙

Chapter Two / Masterlist

After you two came to a stalemate, you insisted on heading back outside and helping the remaining wolves. Steve didn't try to disagree, even though he could see the tired lines under your eyes from the events that night. His Alpha could feel it through their bond, finally returning to his Little One who was pacing, whining. The silver wolf approached her with a slight nudge and embraced her when she sunk into him, being her strength.

 So Steve stayed close to you, even though you square your shoulders and did your best to show strength to those left. The moment you and Steve stepped out of the cabin, the scent of dried blood and death hit you both. It made your stomach roll and tears prick your eyes. You felt Steve’s touch against your hip, turning you into him momentarily so you could press your face into him, inhaling his calming scent, the woodsy smoke and steel covered the dried blood enough for you to regain your control till you pulled away. 

What was the worst part of it was that you were becoming accustomed to that scent of blood and chaos. It was sinking into the ground like a story to retold. It reminded you of the last stand with Pierce, of your Alpha bloodied and panting letting you lean against him in the underground cold tunnels, those burning moments when the Little Wolf was fighting against the serum you were given. You shook your head a bit to clear your thoughts and Steve's hold tightened as he tilted his head to your shoulder, inhaling deeply with a hot press of his nose against your mark. “You don't have to do this Little One. No one will think differently.” Everyone was in shock right now, wandering aimlessly trying to find the surviving members of their pack. Hard to believe that four wolves could cause this much destruction, killing off most of them and taking their Alpha. 

You lifted your head and weaved your hand with Steve’s, squeezing a bit. You were lucky, you still had your Alpha and mate, unlike others. Kat nearby wandered from body to body, searching for Caine. The Little Wolf whined seeing her friend search for him. Your throat shut at the pain she must be feeling. That selfish part of you thankful that wasn't you searching for Steve. “I have to Steve, they are my family.” You unwind yourself for him and went to Kat, who just blinked at you. Her eyes red rimmed as she knelt next to someone, feeling for his pulse. 

“I can't find him Y/N, I don't know where he is.” She croaked out and you sunk down next to your friend, reaching to take her hand in yours. 

“I’m sorry Kat, I'm so sorry… they took him.” You cupped the woman's face, making her listen to you. You could tell when it sunk in, when your words had a meaning for her, the utter defeat seemed to deflate her as she collapsed in your hold, her sobs shaking her as you gently tried to soothe her, strokes over her hair and along her back as she broke with her head in your lap. Steve watched a moment with a deep inhale and clenched jaw. Even the Alpha admired his partner so willing to take the others pain as your own so they wouldn't be alone. 

It was apparent that the pack no longer had their own Alpha in the midst of all this, and Steve cupped his hands around his mouth and sent out a howl, calling those still alive to him so he could give them direction. Right now they needed a leader to pull them out of their shock, figure out where to go from here. 

You felt your chest rise hearing your Alpha calling the others, his deep howl of “Come to me” made your own head tip back with the answering “Im here, Im here” song. Others started to join, moving in groups as they came out of the woods to return home, a mix of wolves and humans filling the sky with a mourning song. 

Once they joined the Alpha, Steve quieted, looking at the wolves who weren't his own, but in desperate need of him right now. “Let's put the fallen to rest.” He simply said, and the wolves dispersed to gather those they lost. 

Soldat happened to hear the Alpha’s howl he left behind reassembling the survivors from miles away. Not that there were many, it was the mission to disassemble the pack while removing the Alpha. Broken packs usually didn't survive long. The wolves either abandoned the area, finding family in other packs, or went into No Man's Land to live as loners till they lost themselves or found another to join. The Alpha they just collected was young. He laid curled up at Soldats feet, having shifted into a sleek black wolf. Soldat reached down, grabbing his muzzle to lift his head and inspect him for a moment. The Black Wolf stared back at him in defiance while Soldat snapped a picture of him to send to Brock. 

~Mission complete, we will drop off the asset and be ready for the next mission. 

He hit send and dropped the wolf's head to let it crash back to the floor. It wasn't long till an answering text beeped. 

~Excellent, stop by the office for your next orders.

Soldat leaned back in his seat, quietly they drove. Under Hydra’s control, the wolves no longer sought the companionship a typical pack brought them. Even the twins sat apart from one another, staring ahead at nothing. Just waiting for the next mission. That was all there life was about, completing the mission. There was no remorse in what their actions just caused. 

It was hours of finding the dead, hours of you finding the broken wolves in shock and doing your best to help them. Some point Natasha joined you all, having found you first. She wrapped you in her arms, and you let your friend hold you while you sunk into her strong hold. Everything smelled of death, but not her. She felt like home, as much as Steve did, and you let her be your strength momentarily.

“I got here as fast as I could.” Natasha squeezed you a bit more before letting go to step back, her hand coming to wipe at your streaked face. “Let me go check in with Steve and I will take over here. You look exhausted.” 

“No, I'm okay.” You shook off the hint that you needed a break, but lifted your head to find where Steve was, closing your eyes as you sought him out using the bond. It was a gentle brush between you. Your Little Wolf went to seek for her Alpha, twining her body around the tired Wolf and pushing her muzzle under his chin in a nuzzle. The motion made you smile to yourself, because you knew Steve felt it too by the immediate warmth you felt flow through you. “He’s over that way.” You said and Natasha glanced over to see Steve making his way over, just as much a mess as You were right now. Natasha let go of you to meet up with Steve, embracing him as well before stepping back so he could wrap an arm around you, your hand sliding up the back of his shirt to knead the small of his back, seeking that connection. 

“Natasha, you’re a sight for sore eyes.” Steve gave a weak smile and Natasha gave a knowing smile back, nodding. 

“I imagine, were you able to track where Bucky and the rest went?” 

“Just to the road, I didn't dare continue. Not with everything that had happened here. It was… terrible. Whatever they did to him, they have full access to his Howling Commandos training, no one stood a chance here. Or any other pack they catch by surprise. I already warned Sam, seeing how close they are.” You could feel him rumble slightly, obviously wanting to return home to be sure their home was protected. 

“This is the second in the area they have hit. They are just picking up momentum. I don't know what they are doing with the Alphas. But every one is the same.” Natasha bit her lip as she looked around. Even though the bodies have been moved, the ground still showed the story. You thought again how the blood soaked ground was going to be haunted by the memories of all the evil that had happened here. Natasha broke your thoughts. “What can I do to help?” 

“Pick up the trail and see if you can tell where they are headed next Nat.” The silent command of ‘Make sure they are not headed for home’ was heavy between them. Natasha gave a nod and disappeared in the woods where Steve directed her. 

The Alpha nudged at Steve when Natasha slipped from sight. <She's tired Steve, it's time to clean up and rest.> 

Just what I was thinking as well. 

“Come on Little One, you are dead on your feet and the others are going home to rest.” He nudged your temple with a slight bump as you both turned around. He was right, the grounds looked basically deserted now, it seemed hard to believe this had been a bustling lively pack not even a day ago. Now, it looked abandoned. 

You let Steve lead you back to the cabin. “Go take a shower.” He eased you towards the stairs leading to the second floor. Making your way halfway up, you paused, looking over the railing. 

“What about you? Are you coming?” Your voice had a bit of a concerned whine in it, and he gave a reassuring smile. 

“In a minute. I'm just bringing us up some food and I will join you Little One. Now go on up.” His tone deepened, not demanding but encouraging you to listen, and you did. Each step up made you feel heavier, and once you entered the bathroom, you couldn't wait for the hot water to take away the feeling of death that clung to your skin, filling your senses. The idea of food made your stomach turn, but you knew it was just Steve trying to take care of the two of you. Downstairs you could hear him moving around and then the creak of the steps signaled he was making his way up when you stepped under the hot water, gasping as the heat encased you. 

Steve brought up a tray of food he found in the fridge, making each of you a sandwich with grapes on the side, along with water. He would have done more, but right now he just didn't have it in him. Setting it aside on a night stand, he made his way for the shower. 

In it he could scent your heated body, fresh with the scent of scrubbed soap, and a deep inhale of the steamy air lifted him a bit. He was looking forward to washing off as well, and ridding himself of his clothes, he joined you in the shower. You side stepped out of the spray so Steve could rinse off before going to clean himself. 

Groans of appreciation at the hot water came from both of you and as you finished rinsing off, you took the cloth from Steve’s hand and scrubbed the spanse of his back and shoulders, leaning against it while wrapping your arms around his midsection, enjoying feeling him so warm and solid against you, so very much alive. 

“Mmhh tired Little One?” Steve asked softly while rinsing off his chest, wide hands rubbing the suds away and you pressed a kiss between his flexing shoulder blades before dipping around him to step under the spray, rinsing off the soap. 

“If I said No, would you believe me?” You blinked up at him and he cupped your face in his hands, his eyes scanning over your face that was dripping from the shower, he shook his head and kissed the droplets from your lashes and down to your wet lips, kissing you slowly. Savoring the feel of your warmth in the kiss, his tongue stroking yours before pulling away. 

“I would be telling you that I knew better.” Steve stated while reaching around to turn off the shower and stepping out to grab a towel and hold it open for you to step into. When you did, he whisked you dry and you tucked it around you while leaving the bathroom to make your way towards the bedroom. 

Steve was quick to follow, sure to gather the clothes and going into the bedroom. He found you sitting on the edge of the bed, doing what would normally be your routine before bed even though it was edging right on mid morning. Your hands swiped the light smelling lotion along your arms and over your shoulders. Steve didn't even bother with boxers or sleep pants. He crawled into his usual side, stretching his side and reached over to skim patterns against your back while you let your head dip forward, setting aside the lotion you have been using. “You okay Little One?” 

You gave a shake of your head and you felt Steve’s arm circle around your waist and pull you in closer. You flipped in bed to face him, laying in against him with your head pillowed on his shoulder. “Why did that have to happen? They were just becoming a real pack Steve.” Your hand lifted to wipe at your face and you felt yourself sink further into Steve's hard body the more he rubbed at your hip and along your ribs, dipping along your curves. His rumble was deep when he pressed his lips to the tip of your head, letting his nose press against the crown of your head, burying into your wet hair. 

He wished he had the answer, something to take the pain he could feel tightening inside of you, the bond sharing waves of sorrow for your old pack. Steve tugged you in closer, your face pressing against his chest, and he felt the hot tears start to fall. 

“You should sleep Little One.” He responded while wrapping you in close and you gave a slight nod, wrapping your arm around him as well as your leg. Steve reached over and tugged a sheet over you while you cried against Steve. 

After a while you lifted your head to look up at Steve. “I just want you to know I don’t blame Bucky, Clint, or the twins. I know they are not killers.” 

Before Steve could say anything, you arched up to kiss him, whispering against his mouth. “I love you Steve, always will.” 

“I love you to Y/N” he said softly, flushing gentle nips on your jawline and rubbing his chin against his bite on your neck while you settled back down. Soon after that you went quiet and let yourself fall asleep, Steve though ended up staying awake. His fingers drifted up and down your back while losing himself in thought. The Alpha gave a gentle nudge to the Little Wolf to see that she was sound asleep before he stretched out next to her, watching over the two of them while she slept. 

<You know she wouldn't blame Bucky, it wasn't him. None of that is him.>

It's just… even in the midst of all this, she isn't angry. It's just sadness and I got to just let her feel it. There is nothing I can do. 

<That is not true, we will be there for her, her strength when she needs it.> 

Steve smiled to himself hearing the wolf, as always the beast spoke common sense he sometimes didn't seem to have. Giving a sigh, he let his head fall back to let himself drift off along with his mate.

Hours passed and you woke to find Steve not next to you. Rubbing your face in his warm pillow, inhaling deeply. He hadn't been gone long. Lifting to see where he was, you saw him sitting on the edge of the bed, talking on his cell. 

“Yea, There aren't many left Sam. And they don't have an Alpha anymore to keep them together.” 

You heard Sam respond, but couldn't understand beyond the muted sound of his voice. You shifted across the bed to drape gently against Steve’s back, letting your forehead press against the back of his neck, soaking in the warmth radiating from him.

“Same track of mind Sam, I was just thinking the same thing. I will tell Y/N. Give Sara our love and be ready. Talk soon.” With that he hung up and tossed his phone to the side. You shifted around and moved to straddle his lap, rubbing your hands against the back of his neck. Steve's hands fell to your hips and pressed a kiss to your mouth. “Hello my Little One.” he growled softly while you arched in against him, rolling your hips while you whimpered softly, nipping at his chin gently. 

“Hello Alpha. What did Sam say?” 

Steve rumbled slightly enjoying the feeling of your hands on his neck, the way your fingers brushed into his hair and tugged slightly. “I was filling him in with what happened.” He buried his face in your neck and inhaled deeply, getting lost in you then. “How we are going to offer any that want to come back with us are welcome to stay with us. They can’t stay here.” You worked your fingers against a knot in his upper back, smiling when you felt him groan into the curve of your neck. “That feels so good Little One.” 

Nipping at his ear, you shift to a stand. His hands trailing down the back of your thighs. “Thank you Steve, for taking those in that are in need of a home. For being an Alpha they deserve.” 

He followed up to a stand and reached for the bags to dig out clothes for both of you. “How about we go make the offer together, Little One?” 

Handing over some clothing that you started to pull on, you nodded. 

The wolves that didn't have a place to go ended up taking Steve on the offer, the rest making arrangements to move on. Preparations were also made for burials, those remaining picked a peaceful spot in a clearing. 

Within a few days Sam brought a crew with him, familiar faces and scents easing Steve. It was a solemn event, shared with tears as the ground was broken to lay those to rest. Each grave site was marked with a sapling that Sam had brought with them from the nursery they used to replace the areas they logged. The saplings once all set in place would one day become its own untouched forest, giving some form of life in the midst of the tragedy. That night the clearing was filled with the mourning howls telling the packs life story to the stars. 

Steve took the time to call the other packs in the area, warning them of the recent attack, even though word of mouth had spread. The last number on his list, Tony. He hasn't really talked to the Alpha since the confrontation with Ross, but he just couldn't bypass him.  

Leaning against a tree where the solitude surrounded him, he let the forests calm wash over him while the AI placed him on hold. 

Tony was going over spreadsheets with Pepper when Friday announced Steve Rogers was on hold. The pair looked up at each other in surprise. “Well… this is a surprise.” Tony admonished and Pepper pointed at the phone. 

“Answer it Tony, You know that Steve wouldn't call for no reason.” She grasped both their coffee cups and moved to a stand. Tony groaned a bit while watching his mate leave, making her grin at him over her shoulder. “Now Alpha.” Then she disappeared from sight. 

“Yes Ma’am!” He stated while reaching to pick up the phone and hooking it under his ear. “Stark residence.” 

“Tony? That you?” Steve grumbled into the phone. 

“Yes Steve, it's me.” Tony rolled his eyes up, leaning back to place his feet on the edge of his desk. “What is going on? That's the only reason you ever call me.” 

“It’s not exactly like we're friends, Stark.” Steve started. 

“Ouch Rogers, here I thought we were.” Tony snapped, unable to pass up a chance to rile the serious Alpha. 

“Stark.” Steve started in a warning and then his voice changed. “Listen, there is a group attacking wolves, they just destroyed Y/N’s old pack. Demolished them, there are only a few left.” 

This caught Tony’s attention, dropping his feet and sitting up straight again. “Is it the ones who killed Happy Steve? Who was it?” 

Tony waited, silence on both ends of the call till finally Steve spoke. “I really don't know if they killed Happy or not Tony. I will say if they did… it wasn't by choice.” 

Tony snapped to a stand while Pepper came back in, immediately her wolf was agitated seeing her mate gripping the edge of his desk, his voice sharp with commanding tone looking for answers. The one he used when he was upset, only this was Steve he was talking to. Steve couldn't be commanded by anyone. She immediately set the coffee down and went around the desk, her hand moving along his back while he snapped into the call. “But you suspect it, don't you Rogers.” 

“I'm not saying anything, all I'm saying is that you know Bucky, Clint, Pietro and Wanda would never hurt anyone willingly, not innocent lives.” 

Tony and his wolf stalled a moment. <He found them, finally.> Tony had as much invested as Steve, seeing that the twins were his pack mates. But none of his trackers were able to get as close as Natasha had been able to, all these months they just kept hitting dead ends on trails gone cold. 

“Did you see them?” He finally asked and Steve gave a Mmhm in response. 

“They weren't themselves Tony… those fucking collars Pierce had, they had something similar on. Thinner, filled with magic. I've seen them before, years ago. And only one has ever escaped them that I know of.” 

“You're talking about when you worked for Fury in Shield.” 

“Yes, when Bucky and I were in the Howling Commandos unit. I also think I can get some answers. As soon as these wolves are settled, I'm going to go get them. You have my word.” 

Tony sat back down, easing Pepper into his lap for the connection. “Whatever you need Rogers, let me know.” 

“I was hoping you would say that.” Steve responded. 

You stood at the car Kat had packed, holding her hands in yours as a teary goodbye was said. “Kat just stay safe out there, okay? I wish you would come home with me. No Man's Land, being a Lone Wolf…” You worked your lip, wrinkling your brow. “Who's going to watch your back?” 

Kat smiled sadly, shaking her head. “I need to be by myself. Maybe, maybe Caine is still out there you know? We don't know what they did with him. I have to go look for him.” 

You squeezed her hands, trying to make her hear your next words. “That's what Steve is trying to do, him, Natasha, other packs. They are doing their best to find Bucky, Clint, Wanda and Pietro. Bring the other Alphas home.” 

“Im not looking for everyone, I’m just looking for one.” Kat stated softly while untangling her hand from yours and circled her arms around you in a hug. “I know they are trying, but I have to look on my own too. I can't just sit and wait for others.” Her head dropped to your forehead, and you both just inhaled against each other in your last embrace, committing each other to memory till your paths crossed again. You had to relent. If it was Steve, you would be doing all you could to find him to. 

“Stay safe Sister.” You whispered and Kat pulled away with a nod, digging out her keys and slipping into the driver's seat. You circled your arms around yourself, watching as the car pulled away and out of sight. With a sigh, you turn to head back to the cabin, watching as Steve continued loading up a truck from someone's house. Lifting the last bag of clothes in, Steve circled around a truck he was loading up for another and wrapped you into his arms, kissing the top of your head. 

“She will come back when she's ready, Little One.” He hugged you in close as your head laid on his chest, giving a nod. 

“I know, it's just hard letting any of them go on their own.” 

Steve hummed a bit in agreement. “Everyone here is ready to go, Natasha is coming back to bring them home.” You lifted your head in wonder as to why the two of you werent. Steve rubbed your back, looking down at you. “We're going somewhere else.” 

“Where are we going?” you tilted your head in question, loosening yourself enough to look at him without craning your neck. 

“Stark. Remember how I was telling you I've seen it before? When Bucky and I were in the Howling Commandos?” You gave a nod to confirm. “The shifter who got away, he went back to his home. I want to find him, ask him how he managed to break loose of the collar.” 

“So… where are we traveling to?” 

“Norway.” 

Your eyes widened a bit, echoing what he said. “Norway?” 

“Yup, if Fury’s intel is correct that Tony acquired, a little town called New Asgard.” 

You couldn't hide the grin, knowing then what that meant. “Means were getting a jet, aren't we?” 

Steve gave a wink at you, breaking out in a grin of his own. “Sure does Little One, you gonna let me teach you to fly it?” Clearly remembering how much you had enjoyed the ride from Wakanda in T’Challa’s jet. 

You played your fingers up his shirt, skimming fingers against his stomach, gently scratching over his muscles that twitched in response to being touched by you. “I'm going to insist on it Alpha.” 

Steve huffed at your playfulness, snapping his teeth near your lips and clasping his hands against your ass, giving a squeeze that made your arch into him with a giggle, some of your sadness fading away being with him. “Look at you getting all demanding. I like it.” He nipped at your lips and you smiled against his mouth, growling back at him momentarily. “But let's finish up here and we will get on the road again Little One.” 

It was a few hours till Steve and You were the last ones left, while you waved goodbye to the last car driving away, the compound now eerily quiet. Steve nipped at your neck, nuzzling the back. “Ready to head to New York Little One.” You reached behind you and took his hand. 

“More than ready Alpha.” 

The drive was several hours, Steve had given you his phone to go through the email that Tony had sent him recalling the information of that particular mission. You read it out loud, while Steve stayed silent listening. Letting the memories of the Howling Commandos wash over him. He could tell the way your voice lifted and words rushed that you were getting caught up in the intel like it was a story. “... And then Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes was taken hostage while covering his team members from higher ground.” You set the phone down, Steve could sense you looking over at him. “How long was he with them?” 

Steve was quiet a moment, his fingers thrumming on the steering wheel. “Weeks Little One. The day he was captured we were removing prisoners from an experiment facility and I had scanned the area. It was all clear, so I thought. Somewhere I missed them coming back into the grounds and Bucky… well he was so focused on making sure the victims were being covered from above that they were able to take him hostage.” 

“How was he when you all found him?” You moved over closer to Steve, and he reached over to grasp your thigh lightly, his thumb sweeping back and forth soothing, probably more for himself then for you. 

“Luckily they had difficulty moving Bucky around, I'm guessing he put up a fight stalling their plans. Made it alot easier to track them with them being hindered. When we found Bucky he wasn’t as some other hydra victims but he was weak. Some of the damage was irreversible. His left arm was damaged, and as a wolf why he limps like he does on that left side. Some of the trauma to his mind.” Steve went quiet once more and you leaned your head against his shoulder, pulling your legs up. “Before that happened, Bucky would have been the next Alpha. He had the mentality for it, outgoing, part of the crowd, a born leader. Afterwards though, he almost left the pack to No Man's Land. There were so many times the Pack mentality was just too much, disappearing into the White Wolf for weeks living feral on the other side of the lake.” You heard the tinge of sadness in your mate for his closest friend, mourning for the man he once was. 

“But he had you, Steve.” 

Steve’s jaw clenched, the muscle ticking a bit. “If I had been more diligent, Bucky never would have been caught.” That's when it hit you that Steve blamed himself for what had happened. You tilted your head to inspect him, and Steve glanced at you from the corner of his eye, patting your leg. “All in the past Little One. Right now we're focused on what we have to do today.” 

You settled in against him. “You got him back then, we will get him back again Alpha.” 

He rumbled slightly without saying anything else. But his foot dropped on the gas pedal, picking up speed in order to get to New York faster. 

It was edging on midnight when he finally pulled up to Stark Towers, which Tony was waiting right out front with Pepper at his side to greet them. When Steve got out of the truck, he held out his arm and slipped it around your waist to have you slide out, when your feet hit the ground, you arched in a stretch and a yawn, making Tony chuckle. 

“It's quite a ride, I'm glad to see you two make it.” He said genuinely, holding his hand out to Steve in greeting, which the Alpha accepted with a hand shake and one to Pepper as well. 

“Pepper, pleasure as always.” Steve greeted Pepper warmly, and she returned the handshake. Tony took one look at you, giving a slight bow of his head. 

“Y/N, I sincerely hope you forgive my actions after my last visit to your home. Regardless of the circumstances, it shouldn't have happened.” 

You take a moment to consider, Steve rubbing his hand along your back reassuringly when you give a nod and hold out your hand. “Accepted Tony, Thank you.” The Alpha covered your hand in his with a smile. 

“Thank you Y/N. Now let us give you a place to crash for the night? The jet is still getting fueled and might as well head out well rested. Norway is a several hour flight, even for one of my machines.” 

Steve glanced at you as you did back at him, both of you coming to a silent agreement as the soft pattering of rain started around you, and the four of you escaped back inside. Steve gave a slight shake of his head to rid himself of the rain water and you used your sleeve to wipe away the rain water from your face. Heading for the elevator, Steve and Tony discussed some of what had happened the past few weeks, Pepper once in a while asking her own question, and Steve drawing you into the conversation when needed. But you simply answered the questions before falling silent once more, not really having the energy to be engaging to their hosts. 

After several moments, the elevator dinged and Friday announced the floor level while it opened. The entire floor was a wide open floor plan, Pepper smiling at the couple. “We hope you two will be comfortable here.” 

Steve nodded and you reached over to embrace Pepper for her kindness. “It's more than enough, thank you.”

“We will leave you two kids to rest then.” Tony was prepared for a quick exit, which both you and Steve were grateful for given the long trip there and the one upcoming.  

Biding good night, you and Steve were left alone to settle in for the night. Steve was quick to send you to shower, knowing it would make you feel better and he went in after you while you dressed in some pajamas, brushing out your hair while you wandered the suite looking around. 

You stopped at the ceiling to floor windows that ran along one wall in the suite. Your room was almost at the top of the tower, it gave an expansive view of New York City at night. It almost stretched as far as you could see, and it made you feel a bit small so high above it all, all these lives not knowing you were looking down on them. The water from the rain streamed down the panes of glass making everything slightly out of focus. Your fingertips pressed against the coolness of the glass, tracing the streams of water running down in an endless rush to get someplace else. 

Behind you, you could hear the water to the shower turn off and the sounds of Steve moving around before the door creaked and the light to the bathroom shut off to leave you both in the dark of the room. There was a bed behind you, large and inviting after a day of travel, and you should make your way there. But the beauty of the glowing city held you enraptured. 

Feeling the warmth of Steve's body move up behind you through your thin sleep shorts and tank top, you sunk back into the hard length of his body, your eyesight going out of focus to see Steve’s reflection in the glass, his eyes glowing a soft yellow haze in the darkness where the Alpha was so close. You inhaled deeply, reaching behind you to draw his arms around you, shifting his hands to slide under your shirt. 

“You smell so good Alpha.” You whispered as his fingers trailed the band of your shorts and dipped beneath them. “Woodsmoke and the forest, home.” You could feel him easing to touch you, the rumbles coming from his chest sparking your arousal. It had been days since you felt him like this, not since the day of the attack. 

Thick fingers traced your folds, easing into your heat while circling your clit. Your head fell back to his shoulder with a satisfied sigh. Steve trailed his nose from the crown of your head down to your neck while he circled slowly, pressing down hard enough to make the heat in your belly grow and your legs have a slight shake. Snaking his other arm around you, he palmed your breast into his palm, sinking his teeth into your neck to keep you held against him. 

“You remind me of home, always so good for me. Letting me take care of you. I love you so much Little One.” He growled softly and you spread your legs for him further, letting him take over. Fingers sunk into you, scissoring against your fluttering walls that started to clench, trying to hold on as he stroked your walls, knowing just where to find that spot that made you cry his name. 

“Steve, uh- more please.” you whimpered out, with Steve you could become needy, wanting only what he could give you.

Steve smirked against your neck hearing you, feeling your wetness start to pool against his palm that he was now using to press against your clit while his fingers plunged back into your wanting heat, moving faster the more you started pressing your ass back into him while rocking in his palm. Your hands were made to press against the glass as Steve stepped forward, pushing you to trap you between him and the windows. The coolness of the glass seeped through your thin tank and the warmth of Steve's fingers rolling over your nipple made it pebble, taunt and sensitive, making you whine out sharply. 

“Steve I have to-” 

Steve rumbled behind you with encouragement, your hips rocking faster and rubbing his cock harder between your ass cheeks. You could feel it rigid and thick with desire but it was all lost when he nipped behind your ear, his breath hot while he growled out his words. “Come on My Little One, My Omega, show me how good you feel.” 

The spiral of heat exploded from your belly to rush all over, locking to hold him while Steve was sure to keep you upright. The city lights wavered in your gaze, losing any focus till they became starbursts in the glass. 

Your forehead leaned against the cool glass, your hot breath fogging up the glass while you came back from your orgasm, the bursts of lights started to come back into focus when you felt Steve hard behind you, rutting his hips against yours.

He growled possessively against your mark, gathering you in his arms, ready to take you to bed and finish what he started. You clung to him, rubbing into his body with a purr of satisfaction, seeking that mindless escape with your Alpha. 

#attack of the winter wolf #the pack #alpha steve x you #alpha steve x little one #steve rogers x you #steve rogers au #shapeshifter steve rogers #amber writes #sweater writes #marvel au

[avengerscompound]

Moving On - Chapter 20

Moving On: A Falcon & Captain Marvel Fanfic

Masterlist PREVIOUS //

Buy me a ☕ Character Pairing:  Sam Wilson x F!Reader, Carol Danvers x F! Reader

Word Count:  2027

Rating:  E

Warnings: angst

Synopsis:  You thought Sam Wilson was the love of your life.  You had planned to do it all with him - marriage, kids, see the world.  Even when you’re life gets turned upside down, and you both end up international fugitives, he’s there by your side.

Then Thanos comes.

When Sam is one of the many turned to dust, leaving you alone and pregnant, you don’t think you’ll ever stop grieving.  Yet, everyone tells you that Sam would want you to move on and live your life - that he’d want you to be happy. Gradually you open your heart up to another.  Carol Danvers has lost people too.  First her daughter, then her wife.  As the two of you lean on each other, feelings grow and you move on together.

So what happens when Sam is returned to you?

Chapter 20: The New Father

“Kit, sweetie, this is your dad.”

Time seemed to stall after you said your words.  It was a strange phenomenon.  All around things were going on as normal.  You could see people clearing the area of dangerous debris to make way for the emergency services whose sirens you were hearing coming up the street.  Carol came and landed beside Sam and gave you a questioning look.  Steve had started jogging over to you, only to be waved away by Carol.

Meanwhile, Sam was just staring at you blankly.  His eyes would flick to the little girl who had very slowly started to move behind you like she was worried any sudden movement would cause her to be attacked.

When she was completely behind you, she tugged on the hem of your shirt.  “Mommy,” she said quietly.  “Is he a ghost?”

You turned around and crouched down to face her.  “No, sweetie,” you soothed, rubbing her arms.  “Our friends did some magic and brought people back.  Your dad is back now.  He’s not a ghost.”

She looked around you skeptically looking Sam up and down and then turned back to you.  “Is Mia back?”

“No, honey,” you said.  “Auntie Maria died because she was sick.  That means she’s gone-gone.”

Kit frowned and looked at Sam again.  “Daddy?” she whispered.

Sam opened and closed his mouth like a fish.  “How… how… how can… you weren’t… How long was I gone?” he babbled.

Carol crouched down and held her arms open.  “Kitty cat, come with me.  Let's go find Auntie Nat or Uncle Steve.  I bet they’ll be happy to see you.”

Kit ran past you and slammed into Carol.  “Mama,” she said and hid her face in Carol’s neck.

Carol lifted her and looked at you and Sam.  “You guys might need to talk alone for a bit.  Come find us when you’re ready.”  And with that she took off, flying with Kit in her arms.

“Come inside,” you said.

Sam followed you into the ship and you took a seat on the bench near the tail.  He sat opposite you, looking completely shell-shocked.

“Sam?”  You said gently.

“How can she be my daughter?  She’s gotta be four years old!  You weren’t even pregnant,” Sam blurts out.

“You’ve been gone five years, Sam,” you said.  “The fight against Thanos in Wakanda, that was five years ago.”

Sam’s jaw dropped and he looked around wildly like he was searching for an escape.  “Five years?!”

You nodded.  “We had memorial services for everyone.  There are tributes in practically every city with the names of people lost.  You were … you were dead, Sam.  And then the others, they got the stones back and brought you back.  I don’t really know exactly what happened.  I just know they brought you back.”

“Why don’t you know?  Aren’t you … what… What's going on?  It’s been an hour since I last saw you.  No… not even an hour.”

You let out a breath.  “Before the battle, when I went to see the medic in Wakanda, she said I was pregnant.  But only a couple of weeks.  I wasn’t sure… I didn’t know if we’d decide to go through with it, and I didn’t want to add this big burden on you right as we went into a fight to save the universe.  I didn’t expect…” you stop and let out a breath.  “I wasn’t hiding it from you.  I expected to tell you about it that night.”

Sam wiped his eyes with the back of his hand.  “It’s really been five years?”

You started crying - the tears silently running down your cheeks.  “Yes.  I’ve been grieving you for five years, Sam.  I still wear your ring -” You tugged the chain you have the ring on out from under your shirt.

“She’s really mine?”  Sam asked.

You nodded.  “She’s really yours.  Everyone kept saying - they kept saying how happy you’d be if you found out I was pregnant, and what a great dad you’d be, and how much you’d love her.  And instead, you’ve missed so much and now you come back and she’s four.  I tell her about you every day.  But that’s not the same.”

Sam seemed to crumple in his seat and he started to sob.  You moved to him quickly and he curled up with his head in your lap.  You held him and caressed your fingers down the back of his neck.

As his tears started to abate he sat up and wiped his eyes.  “She called that blond woman ‘mama’,” he said.

“Yeah… uh, that’s Carol,” you said.

He tilted his head like he was trying to extrapolate every available piece of date from that small statement.  When he spoke again, his tone was accusatory.  “Why would she be calling some woman named Carol; mama?”

“Sam,” you said, frowning.  “It’s been five years.”

“So what?  You’re gay now?” he snapped.

It felt like you’d been slapped.  Of all the people you had expected to hear something like that from, Sam was not one of them.  “That’s not… that’s not how it works.”.

“Why wouldn’t you tell me you were into women?”

It felt like you were being stabbed in the heart over and over.  You knew he was hurting but this attack was like everything you had dreaded when you were grieving and people kept telling you to move on was happening right now.  He wasn’t happy for you.  He thought you betrayed him.  The tears came heavier and you wished you had some kleenex.  “I didn’t think it mattered.  I’m into people.  I was into you.  I love you.”

“And Carol?”  He growled.

“I love her too,” you whispered.

He got up and began to pace the ship.  “Where were you when the fight started here?”

“I was in space,” you said.  “We live on a space station.”

“You’re raising my daughter with another woman on a space station?  Away from everyone she loves?”  Sam yelled.

You jumped a little and started to sob.  Part of you wanted to fight back, but you knew this anger wasn’t really about you.  It was just a shock to him and to have missed out on so much, and for so much to have changed - you couldn’t honestly say if you were in his position right now that you wouldn’t also be angry.

“Sam, please,” you said.  “People kept telling me to move on.  That you’d want us to be happy.  We’re happy.  She’s so wonderful, Sam and she’s growing up getting to see the universe.”

Sam sagged where he stood and came and flopped down next to you.  You offered him your hand and he took it, linking his fingers with yours.  “If I had known there was even the slightest chance that you’d come back, I would have waited for you.  You know I would.  But Thanos destroyed the stones.  Tony had to invent time travel to get you all back.”

“You kissed me,” Sam said.  “You ran to me and you kissed me.  Why would you do that if you’re with someone else?”

“I love you, Sam,” you said, quietly.  “I still love you.”

“So what?  You’re just gonna dump her?  Move back to Earth and be with me?”

You weren’t sure if he sounded angry or hopeful.  Maybe it was both.  You shrugged and shook your head.  “I don’t know.  I don’t know what to do.  This happened so fast.  I love you and I love Carol.  I don’t want to go back into space and leave you behind and I don’t want to stay here and leave the life I’ve made with Carol behind either.”

Sam lifted your hand to his lips and kissed it.  “It’s been less than an hour.”

“I know,” you said softly.

“I don’t want to lose you,” he whispered.  “For me we were happy.  You told me that you’d see me when the dust settled.”

A wave of nausea hit you.  “Oh god, that … that aged like milk.”

Sam chuckled softly and leaned against you.  “I’m glad I’m not dead anymore.  But this is a fucking mess, isn’t it?”

“I’m really glad you’re not dead anymore.  But yes,” you agreed.  “I hope - I hope you can be open-minded.  I don’t want to hurt you.  That’s the last thing I want.”

“And what about Carol?” He asked.

“I don’t want to hurt her either,” you said.  “But about this, I already know she’s open-minded.”

The two of you didn’t say anything for a moment and Sam leaned in and nosed at your cheek.  You tilted your head and kissed him.  It was gentle and tender and so familiar it made your heartache.  You pulled back slowly and he rested his forehead on yours as he caressed your cheek with his thumb.  “I love you,” he whispered.

“I love you too, Sam,” you said.  “With how messy all this is, can you try and remember that?”

He pulled back and nodded.  “I’ll try.”

“Did you want to meet her properly?”  You asked.

He let out a breath and nodded again.  “This is such a shit place to meet your daughter for the first time.”

“Yeah, it wasn’t how I’d imagined it would go either,” you agreed, standing up.

He followed you back out to the now-abandoned battlefield.  A group of people stood down by the river at the dock that had appeared to miraculously escape any real damage.  Along with Carol, Kit, and Steve was Rocket, what appeared to be an anthropomorphic tree, and Thor.  You wondered where Natasha was.  It was very unlike her to not be where Kit was when she was around, but you supposed a lot was going on right now.

You and Sam made your way down to the group and Kit quickly grabbed Carol’s hand and hid behind her.

“Well this is awkward,” Rocket mumbled between his teeth.

“I am Groot,” the tree replied.

“Sam,” Steve said.  “This is Rocket and Groot.  And I suppose you know that’s Carol.”

Sam swallowed and nodded.  “Yeah - uh… hey,” Sam said.

“Hey, you know what?  I bet Quill needs a run down over the past five years.  Let’s go,” Rocket said quickly.  He looked at Carol out of the side of his eye.  “Good luck with this mess,” he muttered.

He and Groot hurried away in the direction of the destroyed compound.

“It is good to see you, Wilson,” Thor said.

“You too,” Sam said.  “You look… good.  You look good, man.”

“Thank you,” Thor said.

Steve approached him and put his hand on Sam’s shoulder.  When he spoke it was a hushed tone.  “This is going to be hard for everyone.  Be patient.”

Sam nodded and when Thor and Steve headed off, Sam crouched down and looked at Kit who was poking her head out from behind Carol’s legs.  “Hey there, little bird,” Sam said.  “I’m not a ghost. I promise.”

“Mommy said you was dead,” she said.

“I guess I was,” he said.  “For me, it felt more like I fell asleep, and then when I woke up, everything was different.  And now you’re here.  I’m really excited to meet you.  I’m sorry I was gone for so long.”

“You’re really my daddy?”  Kit asked, taking a small step out from behind Carol.

“That’s right, sweetheart,” he said.

Kit looked up at Carol for confirmation and she nodded.  “He really is, Kitten.”

Kit looked back at Sam and fidgeted on the spot for a second.  “You’re not a ghost?”

He shook his head and touched his arms.  “See.  Totally real.”

Kit let go of Carol’s hand and ran to him, throwing herself into his outstretched arms.  She wrapped her little arms around his neck and buried her face in his shoulder.  “I missed you, daddy.”

Sam took a shuddering breath and kissed her cheek as he held her close.  “I’m sorry I wasn’t here, baby girl,” he said, choking back a sob.  “I would have been if I could.”

You watched as they hugged each other and Carol came and held your hand.  There was still so much to work out, but this was a good start.

// NEXT

#carol danvers #sam wilson #carol danvers x reader #sam wilson x reader #captain marvel #falcon #captain marvel fanfic #falcon fanfic #fanfic #fanfiction #reader insert #moving on

[stuckybarton]

Red Velvet Cake

Summary:   Behind the sweet smile and angelic personality was a spitfire when someone dared destroy her little bakery in the heart of New York. Steve finds that out the hard way when his girlfriend's bakery becomes collateral damage in a small fight in New York. Warning: Profanities. Mild Violence. (Two Loud Slaps to be specific). Grammar Errors. Not Beta’d. Characters: Unnamed Female Character x Steve Rogers Words: 1,775 A/N: I don’t know, I just thought of this idea and thought why not. Masterlist

You had never thought your life would become this wild, but you've gone with the flow. Who would have ever thought that finally starting this bakery in the heart of New York. It was tough, with just a handful of employees, would bring you into so much chaos in your once peaceful life.

Meeting the Avengers had been a wild ride with a smooth beginning for you. First meeting Sam, a man that was looking for a quick snack post-work out. A man with a soft smile and quick quips that brought a smile on everyone's faces every single time he would come to visit. Then eventually, he came not alone, but with two of his best friend and your life changed ever since.

Bucky Barnes was the mellow of the trio, preferring to stay in the background while Sam would try his hardest to flirt with you and push his other friend with you. But he always had this charm on him that had a few of your female employees swooning just by the simply nickname of Doll he would throw at them.

But Sam's other friend had all his attention on you just as much as you had your entire attention on him. The dame that always spoiled him with sweets and made him enjoy morning runs more now that your bakery become their daily stop after.

It started out with the flirtation, at least that was what Steve believed it to be. Having been used to Sam's daily flirtation, you got so immune to it that it had become easier to hide the warmth in your cheeks or the heart eyes that Sam and Bucky were once quick to point out when Steve wasn't looking. Eventually it ended with him finally asking you out for lunch and the rest, as they say was history between the two of you.

Eventually, it had brought you into the circle of what was his team. The Avengers. Starting with one Tony Stark that had visited your bakery one fair morning and brought everything in your bakery long before the trio would come for their visit. It was an eventful day for you, that much you could admit. Everyone had the rest of the day to themselves and gave you time to spend with Steve, as annoyed as he was to not be able to have his usual treats. You made him your special apple pie as compensation, much to his enjoyment.

Then it was the rest of the team, Natasha Romanoff, Wanda Maximoff, and Vision. Visiting after getting a taste of your pastries that Tony Stark had generously provided for the team. Now like the trio, you now have another trio you can call as your regulars. Then there was Clint Barton, Thor, and Dr. Bruce Banner that eventually came to visit after everyone had egged them on and they would come for a few pastries and coffee, but not as much as the rest of the bunch. You were alright with that, being able to meet Steve's team and knowing each and every single one of them were good people in their own little way was enough for you.

Weeks turned into months, and months now turned to almost two years. Your life at the bakery was filled with ups and downs just as much as your relationship with one Steve Rogers. The constant fear you had when he was on a mission, uncertain whether he would come back alive or not.  Then there was the more often than not times that you were too consumed with the bustling number of customers than you only had time to give him a quick hug and a kiss on the cheek before helping out on the cashier. It had once been a fight between the two of you because of your line of work, but you would constantly compromise. He was out saving the world while you were living the dream you had always wanted for yourself with baking. Instead of his apartment in Brooklyn, Steve was now living with you, in the humble little apartment you had above the bakery. Your little piece of heaven.

This life you had created with Steve was something you had never thought you'd have for yourself but you were enjoying it immensely. You would want nothing more in your life. Until things had gone horribly bad and you want nothing more than to kill Steven Grant Rogers and the rest of the Avengers.

~

Y/N was going to kill him. That much Steve had known while they continued on with the debriefing. A quarter of New York City was wiped clean by the attack of the alien overlord attempting their luck on the planet. As much as Tony had assured that they could stay in the tower while repairs were being made, He was still uncertain with what you would be feeling because of it.

Nothing hurts him more than seeing you sad or disappointed.

"What's the ETA on the repair?" he inquired as soon as the meeting was done.

"More or less two weeks. We've had our team assure Y/N that her employees would be paid full for the two weeks while we are doing repairs." Tony explained. "Last time I heard she barely spoke a word while she helped her employees with cleaning up."

Steve could only sigh, annoyance peaking through his mind. It was worst than he thought.

"Mister Stark, Ms. Y/L/N is on her way to the meeting room." F.R.I.D.A.Y announced.

Before the A.I could finish with the announcement, the sudden slam of the door had everyone's head turn, every single one ready for another fight. But the sight of the innocent Y/N looking displeased brought everyone to a slight calm. There was still a problem, but this was better than another alien attack.

"Babe-"

The resounding slap had everyone else wincing. So much for the Super Serum. Everyone could see the red imprint on Steve's face and your shaky hand responsible for the said mark on the Captain's face.

"Your fucking shield destroyed the ramekins." you snapped, Steve could practically see you shaking from where you stood in front of him.

You were nothing, compared to him, a Super Soldier. But just the sight of you, fuming to the nose made everyone believe that you can easily take him on. This was a genuine surprise for Steve. He had seen so much side of his girlfriend of nearly two years. Through many stages of emotional turmoil, happiness, sadness, annoyance, dysphoria, and that godforsaken puppy dog eyes that he could never say no to. But this, the sight of you  angry, genuinely furious was the last thing he would have ever thought to see from you.

"Everyone has a long day, Y/N." Tony approached and the glare than now focused on her made it very well known that his presence and his response was the biggest mistake he has ever made in the moment. "Why don--"

Tony wasn't able to finish his sentence as he gets to experience the same slap handed to him by you. Without the Super Soldier Serum, the sound of the slap resounded even louder than the former. Everyone was left in a mix of shock and the need to hold in their laughter at the shock look than now lingered on Tony's face as he rubbed his red cheek.

"As for you," you snapped pointing your finger right into Tony. "You're going to pay for both the fuckin bakery and my apartment upstairs. Of all the places Stark, you just had to throw the alien on my newly renovated bathroom."

Tony could only nod.

"Your people also need to talk to my employees, some of them are injured because a big fucking green dickhead thought it would be nice to throw alien matters into the basement like basketballs through the hoops." you snapped side-glancing towards the guilty Bruce Banner that refused to make any eye contact with you. "You're covered for their hospital bills, therapy, and two weeks of their supposed shift."

Tony gaped nodding.

"Jesus, why the fuck does it always have to be New York, better yet, why the hell does it have to be in the US? There are so many fucking countries in this world." You ranted turning your attention back to Steve that now broke into a small smile at your outburst. "You're not off the hook. We're staying here, but you're sleeping on the coach until further notice."

What smile he had now comes falling from his face. Blinking, this was a dangerous situation. Far more dangerous than his earlier encounter with the aliens only hours ago. But all he could do was nod, not knowing if any protest from him would result in a worst punishment.

"Sam," you turned to the man that now looked scared to be your focus. "Can you show me to the kitchen? I'll try making everyone someone to eat. God knows you're all starving." you request, all signs of anger now slowly dissolving from your features.

Steve didn't know what scared him more at this point, your anger or how quick you were able to recover from said anger. As Sam escorted you out of the meeting room, the rest of the team also made their way out to help you in whatever you may need in the kitchen. It now left Steve and Tony alone, practically still feeling the aftermath of your slap.

"Having second thought about proposing, Lover Boy?" Tony finally broke the awkward silence.

Taking a deep breath, the first chuckle all day finally escaped his lips.

No, he was far from having second thoughts. The engagement ring hidden in his locker room made it evident to him what he was about to do on their 2nd anniversary. It would take some convincing on your part after what happened. But you loved him enough to forgive him for what happened, since technically it wasn't really his fault why the bakery was ruined.

"The proposal is still a go, Tony." he responds finally leaving the meeting room to making his way to the kitchen, already hard at work with cooking what he assumed was spaghetti and meatballs and his favourite red velvet cake.

"Steve's not having any cake right?" Nat asked as soon as she caught sight of him.

"You know what, Romanoff--"

"Not even a fucking crumb." Your response even with you facing away from him had everyone roaring in laughter and Steve rolling his eyes even with the smile on his lips growing bigger at the situations.

The things he has to endure for love.

#steve rogers one-shot #steve rogers one shot #steve rogers oneshot #steve rogers imagine #steve rogers imagines #steve rogers fanfiction #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x y/n #steve rogers x you #steve rogers x unnamed female character

[swan-of-sunrise]

Civil War (Chapter Four)

Summary: In the aftermath of the U.N. bombing, (Y/N) receives a call from Steve and is ‘invited’ to the Joint Counter Terrorism Centre in Berlin for questioning.

Pairing: Steve Rogers X Reader

Word Count: 3k

Warnings/Disclaimers: None

A/N: I’m not too sure about this chapter, it’s all over the place and I’ve rewritten it twice so I can’t tell if it’s good or not lol thank you for reading, I hope you all enjoy!

Chapter Four (Previous Chapter)

While the paramedics finished fastening the bandage around her head, (Y/N) sat in the back of the ambulance and silently watched the chaos unfolding. A fire crew was busy hosing down the still-smoldering ruins and a medical helicopter flew overhead as different government agencies began setting up their base camps on the outskirts of the caution tape. The CIA agent who’d questioned her about the incident had informed her that a large-scale bomb had gone off next to their building, injuring over seventy people and killing twelve; she’d gone on to explain to her that if not for T’Challa’s last-minute warning, many more people would’ve perished in the blast.

Poor T’Challa, (Y/N) thought to herself with a pang of sadness. His father, King T’Chaka, had been the closest person to the blast and was killed instantly. The paramedics completed their work and she thanked them before quickly getting out of their way, knowing that there were many others who still needed to be helped. Shoving her hands into the pockets of her ash-covered blazer, she walked along the edge of the crime scene towards where she’d last seen Natasha and T’Challa; different international news reporters were documenting the tragedy and as she passed by one of them, their words almost made her stop dead in her tracks.

“Officials have released a video of a suspect who they have identified as James Buchanan Barnes, the Winter Soldier. The infamous Hydra agent, linked to numerous acts of terrorism and political assassinations…”

(Y/N) continued walking, afraid that she’d be recognized if she lingered too long, and finally sat down on an empty bench near the CIA’s base camp. Once she got over the initial shock of learning the suspected identity of the bomber, she couldn’t help but feel confused; Bucky had been on the run for over two years, ever since the Battle at the Triskellion and the fall of S.H.I.E.L.D., and there hadn’t been any sign of him since. Steve and Sam had tracked down every single lead they could find but to no avail. To her, it didn’t make much sense that after all that time, the wanted man would suddenly decide to do something as massive as bomb the United Nations.

The buzzing of her cell phone in her pocket jolted her out of her thoughts; pulling it out and glancing down at the screen, her eyes widened in recognition and she was quick to answer it. “Hello?”

“Are you hurt?”

“Um…yeah, a little. My right eardrum ruptured from the noise of the blast and my lungs feel like crap, but other than that I’m okay…” She trailed off, listening as Steve let out a shaky sigh of relief. Try as she might, memories of their recent fight came to mind but she forced aside her irritation with him as she continued. “Listen Steve, I just heard about Bucky and I-”

“You’re gonna tell me the same thing Nat did: to leave it up to the Task Force and stay home.”

She blinked, taken aback by the shortness of his tone. “Well, I think she has a point about staying out of it but what I was actually going to say is that-”

“I’m the only one who can bring him in alive, (Y/N), so that’s what I’m gonna do. I just wanted to call and tell you myself so that you didn’t believe I was hiding things from you.” Steve abruptly interrupted and after a moment of tense silence, the hard edge in his voice softened a little. “Look, I’m…take care of yourself while I’m gone, okay? Don’t forget to change that bandage of yours every few hours.”

The call disconnected as (Y/N)’s head snapped up in shock and she hurriedly scanned her surroundings, but the super-soldier was nowhere to be seen. “Bastard.”

“(Y/N)!” She looked over in time to see Natasha striding over to her, her brow furrowed in worry. “(Y/N), I just got a call from Steve a few minutes ago, and-” The spy stopped herself short as she examined her assumedly-angered expression. “I take it you got one, too.”

“Yep, and I’d rather not discuss it right now if that’s okay.”

Natasha nodded. “Fine by me, hot-shot, but we should be going; our presence has been…um, requested in Berlin. At the Joint Counter Terrorist Centre, to be precise.”

Frowning, (Y/N) stood and walked alongside her. “Our? What’s all this got to do with me?” The spy gave her a pointed look and she exhaled through her nose. “Ah, yes, my ‘association’ with Steve Rogers. They’ve guessed that he’d be the first one after Bucky and since I’m his fiancé, they want to hold me for questioning.”

“Pretty much…but there’s another reason that I’ll let Tony tell you about himself when we arrive. It was his bad idea, after all.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

By that point, (Y/N) was well and truly sick of flying; they’d taken the Quinjet to the Berlin-Tegel Airport, where a car had picked them up and drove them to the Joint Counter Terrorist Centre. If her head hadn’t hurt so much and she were in a better mood, she would’ve taken the time to admire all the historical landmarks they passed by. And here I thought that week we spent dealing with Ultron was exhausting, she thought with a humorless smile, getting out of the car and walking alongside Natasha as they entered the parking garage’s elevator.

“When you’re questioned by an agent, be sure to answer as honestly as possible.” (Y/N) glanced up from her dirty sneakers and met Natasha’s serious expression. “Cooperation’s the only thing that’s gonna help Steve and Sam out right now, (Y/N). Don’t let the agent get inside your head, though; make sure that you’re the one in control of the situation, just like I’ve taught you. If I know them like I think I do, they’re gonna try and get more valuable intel out of you than just Steve’s whereabouts.”

She nodded after a brief moment of hesitation and the spy’s shoulders relaxed a little. The elevator stopped at the top floor and its doors slid open to reveal two men; one was Tony Stark, dressed stylishly in a dark-grey suit with a tense smile on his face and the other was an older man with salt-and-pepper colored hair that she didn’t recognize. The stranger stepped forward and shook Natasha’s outstretched hand. “Miss Romanoff, thank you for coming in so quickly.”

“Of course,” Natasha replied before glancing over at (Y/N). “(Y/N), this is Everett Ross, Deputy Task Force Commander of the CIA. Agent Ross, this is (Y/N) (Y/L/N).”

Agent Ross smiled and shook her hand, but (Y/N) got the distinct feeling that he was studying her expression and analyzing her behaviors. “I wish we were meeting under better circumstances, Miss (Y/L/N); my niece and nephew are big fans of your novel.”

(Y/N) murmured her thanks and followed the trio as they walked down a covered sky-way, not noticing that Tony had fallen into step beside her until he quietly asked, “How’re you holdin’ up, Austen?”

“Let’s just say that I’ve had better days.” She remarked, glancing over at the billionaire with a raised brow. “Nat mentioned something about a bad idea you wanted to run by me?”

“Oh, I have a couple of ‘em, but I’ll let you get changed before I go ahead and tell you. When I heard about the bombing, I figured that you and Romanoff would need clothes so I packed some before I left the compound.”

Touched by his thoughtfulness, (Y/N) allowed him to lead her to a private bathroom and quickly changed out of her soot-covered clothing; she felt a little bit like her usual self as she emerged from the bathroom, but the comforting feeling her change of clothes had inspired soon disappeared when the billionaire ushered her into a glass-walled conference room in the middle of what she imagined was a control room.

“Sorry if it seems like we’re sitting inside a fish bowl but this is the only place where we can talk without being overheard.” Tony sat down across from her at the long table, leaning back in his chair and crossing his arms over his chest. “And I’m sorry about the civilian consultant thing, Austen. We all found out about it last night when Secretary Ross called to ask who’d decided to sign; he seemed crankier than usual when we told him that we didn’t know what you’d decided to do.”

(Y/N) rolled her eyes and leaned her elbow onto the table, resting her head in her hand with an exasperated sigh. “What, does Ross think that if I sign then that’ll make Steve suddenly change his mind and decide to sign too?”

“Pretty much…but truth be told, he’s not the only one.” Her brow rose in surprise as Tony sat forward in his chair, an uncharacteristically subdued expression on his face. “Look, (Y/N), none of us wants to see Rogers gone. The team needs him and we both know how much he needs the team, so…I was hoping that if you signed, you’d be able to convince him that he’d be doing the right thing by signing too. Once Rogers signs them, then Wilson and Maximoff should follow suit and we’d have our Earth’s Mightiest Heroes all back together again in no time. What do you think?”

“You make it sound so easy…and I wish it was, Tony. I really do.” She stood and walked over to the glass wall, her eyes trained on a large computer monitor that bore her fiancé’s photograph on a wanted poster. “But you and I also know that once Steve’s made up his mind about something it’s impossible to change it. I tried telling him that refusing to sign might put our future together in jeopardy, and do you know what he said?”  Turning back around, she met the billionaire’s gaze and mirthlessly smiled. “He said that he couldn’t afford to be selfish and he left it at that.” A lump formed in her throat as she blinked away her tears and shrugged. “He respects the hell out of you, Tony, so maybe you’ll have a better change at convincing him. I’ll be there when you do, but…since I haven’t decided what I’ll do yet, I honestly don’t know how much help I’ll be.”

Just as Tony opened his mouth to reply, the glass door of the conference room slid open and none other than Sharon Carter poked her head into the room. “If you’re ready, Agent Ross would like to ask you some questions.” (Y/N) stood and spared Tony a final glance before following the agent down the hall, pointedly ignoring the jealous pang in the pit of her stomach as she did. “Romanoff mentioned that you weren’t much of a coffee drinker, so I brought you some hot chocolate instead.” She looked over to see Sharon holding out a to-go cup out towards her, a hesitant but friendly sort of smile on her face. “Might help settle your nerves before your talk with Ross.”

She accepted the beverage with a murmur of thanks and took a sip as they continued down the hall; giving the agent a sideways glance, she cleared her throat before saying, “I’m sorry about your aunt, Sharon.”

“Thank you…and thank you for everything you said in your eulogy. Actually,” Sharon stopped beside the stairwell door and gestured towards it. “We don’t have much time, but do you mind if we talk for a quick sec?” (Y/N)’s brow furrowed a little but she nodded and followed her into the stairwell, watching as she leaned back against the wall and shuffled her feet. “You meant a lot to Aunt Peggy, (Y/N), but I don’t think you know just how much she appreciated you. Back before her dementia got worse, she’d call me after her visits with Rogers and we’d talk for hours; she worried about him, always telling me that he was deliberately keeping himself from embracing his new life and that there wasn’t anything she could do to help. But then you came into his life and from what she told me, it was a night and day difference; knowing that you were there for Steve, as a friend and then as something more, gave her piece of mind. She really liked you, (Y/N), and she really respected you. I just thought that you should know that.”

“Thank you, Sharon, that…that really means a lot to me.”

The agent nodded, suddenly looking a little uncomfortable. “I would’ve told you all that after the funeral but you and Steve were sort of…well, you know…arguing. I swear I wasn’t eavesdropping, it’s just that you both were kind of loud and the cathedral has crazy-good acoustics.” (Y/N) started to reply but Sharon cut her off with a firm head shake. “You’ve got nothing to apologize for, (Y/N). I’m not exactly a fan of the Accords but just between us? I think that Steve was out of line back there.” Unsure of what to say, she nodded once and took another sip of her drink as the agent looked down at her wristwatch. “C’mon, we should get going before Ross starts looking for us.”

The two of them left the stairwell and continued down the hallway to an office; Agent Ross was seated at a desk and reading through a file, looking up from his work with a friendly smile. “Thank you, Agent 13, that’ll be all.” With one last glance, Sharon turned and left them alone. “Please, take a seat.” (Y/N) sat down in the chair across from him and crossed her leg over her knee, trying her best to remain cool and collected. “Miss (Y/L/N), we have reason to believe that Captain Rogers plans on interfering with the apprehending of the Winter Soldier; can you tell me when you last spoke to your fiancé?”

“A little over three hours ago in Vienna. He called to ask if I’d been injured during the bombing and then he warned me that he was planning on bringing in Bucky himself. That’s all he said.”

Ross nodded and gestured to the bandage wrapped around her head. “And are you okay?”

“Yes, it’s only a ruptured eardrum; the bandage is just keeping the ear from becoming infected.” (Y/N) shrugged, taking another sip of her drink before setting it down on the desk. “Truth be told, I’ve had worse.”

Nodding again, the agent picked up the open file on his desk and scanned its contents. “Yeah, it seems like you have. In March of 2014, you suffered a moderate-grade concussion, GSW on your left thigh and a severe muscle contusion on the other thigh; it also says here that you even needed an emergency blood transfusion upon arrival at the hospital.” He looked back up at her with an arched brow. “Sounds like a lot for a civilian to go through.”

(Y/N) blinked in surprise. “I-it was-”

“And according to witness statements from the Avengers, the Artificial Intelligence known as Ultron targeted you last year because of your close relationship with Steve Rogers, is that correct?” Nodding, she struggled to keep her expression neutral as her fingers began reflexively tracing along her old gunshot wound. “It looks like you were just a pawn in Ultron’s plan to break the Avengers apart, and it very nearly worked.”

Her first instinct was to snap at the agent but after recalling Natasha’s earlier warning, she swallowed her frustration and gave him a fleeting smile. “The CIA certainly cares a lot about historical fiction novelists, doesn’t it?”

Ross chuckled and leaned forward in his seat. “Only the ones engaged to rogue super-soldiers, of course. Speaking of super-soldiers, can you elaborate on the nature of your fiancé’s connection to James Barnes?”

“There’s nothing much to say that hasn’t already been said; Steve and Bucky were childhood friends who fought together during World War II and when S.H.I.E.L.D. fell, Steve and Sam tried searching for Bucky but they never found him.”

Nodding, the agent reached over and moved his computer monitor to face her; on the screen was a blurry image of a man wearing dark clothing, obviously taken from grainy security camera footage. “And is this James Barnes?”

“Yes, although I’ve only seen him in person once and this photo’s a little blurry.”

“Okay, let me see if I’ve got this straight: Steve’s old pal bombs the U.N. meeting that you, his fiancée, was attending and instead of rushing to your side like any other partner would do, he decides to leave the country to apprehend Barnes himself. Does that pretty much sum things up?” (Y/N)’s jaw clenched tightly and she stared silently at the agent in front of her, who tilted his head to the side as he considered her. “You see, the CIA knows that you and Captain Rogers are close but what we don’t know is how far you’d go to protect a man who doesn’t sound like he’s got your best interests at heart.”

Before (Y/N) could finally lose her temper, another agent poked his head into the office. “I’m sorry, Agent Ross, I know you said that you didn’t want to be disturbed but this is urgent.”

“Fine, fine…”

Ross stood and followed the agent out into the hallway, leaving the office door cracked open just far enough for her to make out some of what they were saying. “Rhodes…all of them arrested…Bucharest…ETA in less than six…”

Thank goodness they’re all right, (Y/N) thought as relief washed over her, they’ll both be charged with obstruction of justice but at least they’re alive. Some of her elation disappeared as her mind drifted back to Agent Ross’ line of questioning; Natasha was right, the CIA was taking the golden opportunity to get intel on Captain America with the knowledge that what they were doing was protected under the Sokovia Accords. The thought of being manipulated and used that way infuriated her but what angered her more was that this all stemmed from Steve’s unwillingness to consider the consequences of not signing the Accords. You’re in control here, she told herself with a calming breath, just do everything Nat told you to do and you’ll be okay…

Agent Ross reentered the office and sat back down with an expectant smile on his face. “Well, now, where were we?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: This story’s a little more challenging to write than The Winter Soldier or Age of Ultron, there’s so much angst to deal with and writing these chapters really takes a lot out of me, so any likes, reblogs and comments are really appreciated ❤️

Thank you all so much for reading and commenting, you guys are truly amazing! I’ve created a Spotify playlist inspired by this series, and I’ll be updating it every time I upload a new chapter. Enjoy!

Spotify Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4TsJ2TY1F2HDXhEYOfzCjY?si=f5f309da80a74a63

Chapter Five

Civil War Masterlist

Tagging: @mrs-obrien​ @lahoete​ @awkward117​ @cminr​ @natdrunk​ @momc95​ @savedbystyle​ @miraculouscloud​ @awkwardnesshabitat​ @marinettepotterandplagg​ @khuang3​ @supersouthy​ @benakenalove​ @brooke0297​ @hufflepeople​ @becausewelie​​ @outoftheregular @supreme-tantrum​ @ladydmalfoy​ @mads-weasley​ @username23345​ @crist1216​ @aesthethickks​

#stumblin' in #civil war #steve rogers x reader #captain america x reader #steve rogers #captain america #natasha romanoff #black widow #sam wilson #falcon #tony stark #iron man #sharon carter #agent 13 #everett ross #agent ross #captain america civil war #marvel cinematic universe

[fic-for-fic-sake]

A Happy Accident

A/N: The other day I found out that Chris Evans may possibly have a sex dungeon? I don’t write real people fics but I knew I HAD to write a Steve Rogers fic about this because I mean...c’mon. Also the text conversation in the fic is indeed a real conversation between my friend and I. 

Pairing: Steve Rogers x reader

Warnings: NSFW, dirty talk, dom/sub, flogging, being tied up, penetrative sex, honorifics, praise kink

Word Count: 5.4k

You knew there was trouble before you even reached the meeting room, it was like a palpable tension you could sense coming from the conference room. You mentally prepared yourself for whatever was to come as you walked in and took your usual spot next to Natasha. 

“Do you have any idea what this is about?” You questioned her, murmuring under your breath since nobody seemed keen to speak above a whisper for the time being. 

“Some kind of security breach, we don’t know how bad yet, we have to wait for Stark.” She explained, speaking in clipped tones. She seemed nervous, which was understandable given the circumstances. A security breach could mean a number of things, none of them good. Anything from weapons tech to secret identities could’ve been revealed in the breach. 

The tension seemed to come to a head when Tony and Steve walked into the room. Everyone erupted into a flurry of activity, peppering the two men with so many questions it was hard to make out what came from who. 

“What was taken?” Someone asked. 

“Was it anything serious?” Someone else wondered. 

“Do we need to scrap the new suit designs?” You asked, adding your voice to the babble. 

“Okay everyone settle down and give Tony some room to think.” Steve urged all of you, forming a one man barrier around Stark. Which you had to admit was rather effective. Once everyone reseated themselves and Steve gave Tony a nod, Tony cleared his throat. 

“By now you all have obviously heard that there’s been a security breach. We don’t know who is behind the breach but so far all that was leaked was text conversations of the following Avengers; Wanda, Sam, Bucky, and Y/N.” 

You felt your heart drop to your stomach. You were a target in the security breach. But why? Why you specifically and why just your text conversations? It seemed rather harmless considering everything else they could’ve taken. 

“Luckily Wanda doesn’t really text anyone because everyone she knows is here. As far as Sam, Bucky, and Y/N are concerned they only leaked conversations from your work phones, meaning your personal phone security isn’t in question.” Tony reassured you all. Well, it reassured Sam and Bucky at least. 

“Um, what do you mean ‘work phone’?” You asked, looking around with a puzzled expression on your face. 

“You do have a burner phone for personal use, right?” Nat asked from beside you. Now your heart was located somewhere in your feet. 

“I didn’t know I needed one.” You whispered, barely contained horror edging its way into your voice. 

“Well, I mean what’s the worst that could be there?” Sam asked, trying to reassure you. Luckily, or unluckily enough, you didn’t have to answer that question because within the coming days they would all find out. 

After the meeting you tried to go about your normal routine and ignore the security breach as best as you could. That got considerably harder the following morning, when the hacker released your private conversations with your friends for all the world to see. They went something like this: 

Sarah: Do you think Steve Rogers is good in bed? 

You: Obviously, dumb question. 

Sarah: Do you think he’s kinky though? 

You: Oh 100%, no way he doesn’t have a secret sex dungeon or something. 

Sarah: Since you’re an Avenger now you should try to find out. 

You: HAHAHAHAHA that’s hilarious and something I’ll never do, in reality. But in theory PUT ME IN COACH! I bet he would probably make me sign an NDA and I would totally be down for that. 

Sarah: I’ll sign a DNR

You: HAA, I would sign the NDA but also have to tell you what’s happening and then I would make you sign an NDA. 

Sarah: Then you’re breaking the NDA??

You: Not if you don’t tell anyone goddamn be cool. 

Sarah: It’s the principle of the thing

You: ...I wonder what kind of dom he is

Sarah: Idk if he’s a daddy. He feels like a Sir or Master. I also think he doesn’t have soft limits, only hard limits. 

You: as much as I would like to think he’s a pleasure dom I don’t think that’s true

Sarah: I agree

You: Maybe a brat tamer? 

Sarah: That feels too tame for him. 

You: Okay so then just a no holds bard whipping dom. I would wait all day in his sex dungeon just to lick his boots when he came home. Does that make me depraved? Probably. 

Sarah: Possibly, I also think he’d degrade the shit out of you, like kinda pet play shit. I also think he has a spreader bar collection. Aaaand an overstimulation kink. 

You: Oh agreed, that and edging. I feel like he would edge you for hours and then leave to go on a mission or something and you’re not allowed to touch yourself and then he comes back hours later and you’re just aching for release. And then only after you’re BEGGING he would let you come. 

Sarah: Oof. How much do you wanna bet his dungeon is like a sensory deprivation thing? Think about it, hours upon hours of not having any form of relief, after begging nonstop, no real form of your senses and then BAM normal orgasm but heightened to the absolute max. 

You: YEP! I bet he’s like the king of aftercare though, like 1000/10 so sweet. Like Steve Rogers is legit such a nice human being so I assume aftercare is the same. 

Sarah: AYO SIR LEMME BE YOUR SUB

You: GOD FORREAL!

Needless to say, you did not leave your room that day. The next day you tried to get away with not leaving your room again but Nat was having none of that. 

“Come on Y/N, I promise it’s not that bad, I’ve said much worse.” She assured you as she practically dragged you out of your room and into the elevator. 

You buried your head in your hands and let out a frustrated scream. “He’s a coworker, Nat, and I totally objectified him and basically said all the filthy things I wanted him to do to me.” 

“And I bet he’s real flattered about it! The man needs a good ego boost every now and then.” She replied with a laugh. To which you responded with another frustrated scream and a kick to the elevator doors as they opened. “I bet he didn’t even read it, I doubt anyone on the team did.” She said, sounding certain in her own thinking. She half convinced you until you walked into the training room and every pair of eyes turned to you, including Steve’s baby blues. Fuck. 

“Okay we’re working in a group today people, focusing on enhanced individuals with external powers. Wanda and Y/N against Sam, Bucky, and Steve.” Nat announced, opening the door to the special training facility. So you and Wanda wouldn’t trash too much of Stark’s equipment with your powers. 

“Hey Y/N, you been to any good sex dungeouns recently? I’m looking for one.” Sam quipped as you made your way to the starting point. Before you could even think about what you were doing the smell of ozone was ripe in the air and you sent a bolt of lightning hurtling towards Sam who was barely able to dodge it in time. 

“Sorry...hand slipped.” You mock apologized, making it clear that you would have another ‘hand slip’ if he didn’t keep his mouth shut. He got the point well enough but the damage was already done. The tension was worse now than when you first found out about the breach, everyone trying not to bring up the elephant in the room. 

Nat cleared her throat and started her countdown and then the training began in earnest. After an hour you were all panting and sweating, utterly spent from your session. Steve passed everyone a water bottle and you took it gratefully, chugging the cool liquid in earnest. It was then that another comment was made, this time by Bucky. 

“Thanks for the aftercare daddy.” He mocked as he opened his own water bottle. Once again the smell of ozone was in the air but you didn’t have a chance to meet your target before Steve had Bucky pressed against the wall, his forearm digging into the other man’s throat. 

“That’s enough.” He growled through his teeth. Everyone was silent for a minute and you almost felt sorry for the deer in the headlights look Bucky was now wearing on his face, almost. A shower of frustrated sparks extinguished all the lights in the room as you stormed from the room, embarrassment trailing after you. 

That had been four hours ago and you hadn’t left your room, despite Natasha banging on the other side of your door. You had asked FRIDAY not to open it for anyone unless given your express permission. It seemed even the AI knew what kind of a mess you had landed yourself into, as she was immediately understanding of such a request. You were in the process of ordering a burner phone off of Amazon when there was a knock at your door. 

“Nat, I don’t care how many books you offer to buy me, I’m NOT coming out of this room.” You yelled into the empty space of your room. 

“Noted, but uh, it’s Steve. Can we talk?” You were at the door before he finished his sentence. You opened it no more than a crack, not courageous enough to do more. 

“I don’t wanna talk to you, I’m mortified.” You mumbled, looking down at your feet instead of the imposing figure outside of your door. Steve gently pushed on the door with his hand and you let him open it the rest of the way. He brought gentle fingers to your chin and tilted your head back so you were looking into his eyes. 

“There’s nothing to be mortified about, sweetheart. I just wanna talk.” He replied beseechingly. And maybe it was the tone of his voice, or the way he looked at you, but you relented and let him in, closing the door softly behind you. 

“Listen, I’m really sorry for what I said. I obviously never thought it would see the light of day but that’s not an excuse and doesn’t make it okay. Fuck, Steve I’m so sorry. I can get reassigned if you want, have SHIELD put me somewhere else.” You rattled off apologies and half baked plans before you felt his hands gently clasp your shoulders and once again you were forced to look up into his eyes which had gone saucer wide. 

“Doll what are you talking about? You don’t need to be reassigned, it's not that big of a deal.” He said, in an attempt to comfort you. 

“Not a big deal? I practically accused you of having a sex dungeon and being a mega dom.” You blurted out, mortification making your voice rise half an octave. 

He let out a soft sigh before he sat down on the edge of your bed, “It’s not like you were completely in the wrong.” He replied, and that’s when your brain short circuited. 

“What? You have a sex dungeon?” 

“Well, it’s not a dungeon, it's just my bedroom, but yes I do, partake in those types of things you described.” He explained, his voice as even and calm as if he were discussing the weather. 

“Oh.” Was all you could really bring yourself to say. 

“Oh? That’s all? I have to say you were much more articulate in your texts.” He teased, his voice suddenly becoming deeper and taking on an air of authority that wasn’t there a second ago. “Tell me what you’re thinking.” 

And again, maybe it was because of his tone or because of the absurdity of the situation you found yourself in but you answered him honestly. “I’m thinking I’m absolutely mortified that my coworker found out how badly I want him to fuck me.” 

“What else?” He prompted. You couldn’t breathe properly, he was taking all the air from the room and the intensity in his gaze pinned you to the spot, like an unsuspecting doe finding itself at the barrel of a gun. 

“I’m wondering how correct my predictions were. What kind of a dom you are.” 

“Would you like to find out?” 

“Yes.” You answered before you could think better of it. The second the word left your mouth your eyes went wide at the confession. Because you did want to find out, God did you want to find out what kind of shit Steve Rogers, the golden boy, was into. 

“Then we have ourselves a deal. You want to find out what I’m into and I want to show you.” 

“Right now?” You asked, breathless. You could feel your core ache at the suggestion, the want plain as day. 

He chuckled before he moved to stand before you. “No pretty girl, not yet.” He whispered, bringing his right hand up to cup your cheek and stroke his thumb across the expanse of your lips. “First we have to talk about a few things.” 

“Like what?” You questioned, completely enraptured by this man, finding yourself willing to submit to whatever he wanted you to. You were terrified by how much the prospect excited you. 

“Like exactly what you want me to do to you. Your texts were very...explicit. But, that may have just been talk. I need to know specifics if this is going to work.” Steve explained, backing you up until you hit your dresser. Without a word he lifted you on top of it and stood between your legs, one of his hands tracing absent minded patterns on your thigh. 

It was hard to think with him in such close proximity but you tried to clear your mind because you really wanted this, your mouth went dry at the thought. “I want...I want to be tied up. And I want to be blindfolded. And whipped.” It felt weird to lay your desires out plain before you like this. It made you feel exposed, but it was also oddly empowering. 

Steve nodded his head at your requests. “You mentioned something to your friend about edging and orgasm denial, is that something you still wanted to try?” 

“Yes, but not, not yet. I’ve never um, I haven’t- I’ve never been kinky with a partner.” You explained to him, feeling an embarrassing heat creeping up your face. 

“Hey, no need to be embarrassed, we all start somewhere.” Steve insisted, bringing his hands up to settle on your hips. “Anything else?” After you shook your head he gave you a nod in reassurance. “Okay, I’ll be in touch.” He said as he stepped away from you. 

That was three days ago and you hadn’t heard anything from him on the matter since. You had trained with him, went for a run with him, had the usual team meetings and exchanged the usual pleasantries but nothing out of the ordinary. You had even gone far enough in your wandering mind to think that maybe you imagined the whole interaction. 

On Friday, you were told that Steve had gone away on a mission and by that point the team was done teasing you about the leaked conversation, already having moved on to the next thing. You had made plans to go out with them that night to a community outreach thing in Manhattan. You had just gotten your jeans on when a piece of paper slid across your floor from the door. 

You walked over to it, thinking someone had just dropped their paper, when you saw what was written on the other side of it.

Text an excuse to Stark for the outreach and then come to my room. -SR 

Your heartbeat sped up to a gallop as you read the message through two more times, just to be certain. This was it, it was happening. With shaky fingers you texted Tony a flimsy excuse about draft reports you needed to finish before you put your phone back on your desk and calmly made your way to Steve’s room. 

You went to knock but found the door slightly ajar. Taking that as your cue you stepped into Steve Rogers room. While it wasn’t the first time you had been here, it was certainly a circumstance that you weren’t used to. Everything seemed...different somehow. The curtains were drawn and the only light came from dim overhead lighting. There was a faint scent of jasmine that you assumed came from a candle or incense burner you couldn’t see somewhere. On the bed, the sheets had been changed to something that looked like silk and resting on top was an eye mask and two long chords of rope. Which seemed innocuous enough, current circumstances notwithstanding. 

“Shut the door and lock it please.” A voice commanded from a shadow in the corner of the room. As soon as you locked the door Steve Rogers emerged from the shadows in an all black version of his Captain America suit. You had never seen him in such a suit before and the sight of him in it made your mouth water and your knees buckle. This was really happening. 

“I have to admit, when I read your text conversation I was surprised to say the least. I didn’t know how many dirty thoughts resided in that head of yours but you did not disappoint, did you sweetheart?” He questioned as he made his way over to where you stood, rooted to your spot by the door. He gently pressed against your shoulder and you followed his lead, letting him back you against the door, his strong hands landing on either side of your head, arms caging you in. “And then when we spoke, you were /very/ specific in what you wanted and I am nothing if not obliging, you’ll find.” He whispered into your ear and you couldn’t help the small moan that escaped your mouth at the implication behind his words. 

“Are you ready to be my good girl? Hmm sweetheart?” 

“Yes Steve.” You whispered, your mind not being able to form anything other than those words. 

He made a slight tsking sound. “In here, don’t call me Steve. It’s Captain. Got it?” 

“Yes Captain.” You replied obediently. 

“Good girl, now get undressed for me.” He commanded, stepping back to give you room to complete his task. With nervous fingers you lifted your shirt above your head and undid the clasp on your bra. You watched as Steve’s eyes took in your exposed top half, he licked his lips which made you shiver in turn. Confidence growing by his visible excitement you unbuttoned your jeans and slipped them down your legs along with your panties, until you were gloriously naked before him. 

“God, you're so beautiful sweetheart. I’m already getting hard and all you’ve done is get undressed.” He praised you as he palmed himself through his tac pants. “Come here pretty girl.” He insisted as he picked up the blindfold. 

You walked over to him and turned around as he secured the blindfold against your eyes and tied it for you. “Now, we’re gonna use a color system, okay? Green means you’re okay to keep going, Yellow means to slow down, and Red means stop. Can you remember that doll?” 

“Yes Captain.” You murmured as you adjusted to not being able to see. You tuned into your other senses to rely on what was happening. You felt Steve take your hand and walk you over until you reached the side of the bed. He helped you up before asking you to lay down on your back. 

“Okay pretty girl I’m gonna tie you up now.” He told you as you felt both of his hands take your left arm and maneuver it above your head before securing your wrist in place with rope. He pressed a gentle kiss to the spot before repeating the process with your other arm. “How do you feel sweetheart?” 

“Good Captain, I feel good.” You told him as your heartbeat kicked up another notch. You felt him take your left leg with gentle fingers and tie your ankle to the baseboard of the bed. You gasped as he secured your right ankle, knowing you were now naked and spread bare before him. You felt the bed dip as he kneeled over you and brought his mouth down to whisper in your ear. 

“What’s your color baby?” 

“Green.” You replied. Almost immediately you felt his lips press against yours, desperate and hungry for you. You kissed back with a fervor you didn’t know you possessed. It was a strange sensation, kissing someone you couldn’t touch let alone see, but that didn’t make it unpleasant. You felt blissfully detached from your body and the need raced down to your pussy until you had the sudden urge to close your legs and hide your arousal. 

Steve chuckled against your mouth as his left hand snaked down to see what you were trying in vain to hide. “So eager for me and we’ve hardly started” He lazily swiped his fingers along your folds to feel the wetness that gathered there. He then brought the same hand up to your breast and worked your juices around your nipple, making you groan at the sheer wantonness of it all. Steve happily swallowed your groan with his mouth, his tongue taking the opportunity to pass your lips. 

You fervently kissed him back as his ministrations against your nipple continued. His lips left yours and left a trail of hot kisses down your throat and over to your neglected right nipple. You felt him blow cold air on it and your back bowed against the bed, your arms straining against the restraints. He scraped his teeth against your sensitive bud and you couldn’t help the noises that escaped your mouth. 

“Oh fuck, Captain.” You let out as he took your nipple into his mouth. You could feel his left hand leave your nipple and you let out a whine of protest. He only laughed against your skin before you heard the faint opening of a drawer. Your ears picked up the sound of him rummaging around for something but you couldn’t focus too much on that as the rest of your body was alight with fire as he continued to work on your nipple with his mouth. He finally found what he was looking for in the drawer and he released your nipple with a wet popping sound before you felt his weight shift and he removed himself from you. 

“You mentioned something about being whipped.” He teased, and you could hear that his own arousal had made his voice hoarse. Your cunt throbbed in response. “Do you know what a flogger is pretty girl?” 

“Yes Captain.” You replied from your position on the bed. Your mouth went dry at the mental image you had of Steve in his black tac suit with a flogger in hand. How would he use it on you? Would it hurt? Be pleasant? The anticipation was eating you up in the best of ways. 

“Good girl. We’re gonna do some counting. Since this is your first time we won’t do too many, just ten. But you have to count them pretty girl. If you forget, or lose count, we start over. Do you understand?” 

Oh fuck. “Yes Captain.” You heard him chuckle from somewhere above you before you heard the whoosh of the flogger and the sensation on your skin. You gasped as the leather straps came down hard against your left nipple. “One.” The second one came down against your right nipple and you found that your pussy clenched around nothing. “Two.” 

Numbers three, four, and five were placed on your nipples and your stomach.

“Halfway there pretty girl, you’re doing so well.” Steve’s voice came from somewhere around you. A thin layer of sweat had broken out over your skin and your arousal was through the roof. You found yourself panting in anticipation of the next strike. It came, the leather striking against your dripping center and you let out a gasp as your back arched off of the silk sheets. “Six” 

“Oh you liked that one didn’t you sweetheart?” Steve teased. 

“Yes Captain.” You replied breathlessly. Number seven came in the same spot and another lewd sound left your mouth as the flogger found its spot. Numbers eight and nine he placed on the sensitive insides of your thighs. 

“Last one pretty girl. You’ve taken it so well I’ll let you decide where this last one goes.” 

“Hit my pussy again, please, I want it so bad Captain.” You practically pleaded. Under any other circumstances you would’ve been ashamed at how pathetic you sounded but you didn’t care. Steve Rogers was doing depraved things to you and you couldn’t think straight. You just wanted him to keep doing what he was doing, to take all of you, every tiny nook and cranny of your being until he knew your pleasures like the back of his hand. 

“Such a needy girl, maybe after the flogger I’ll give you a reward.” He replied, sounding pleased with you, before he placed the tenth and final flog against your aching core. “God you look so sexy like this, blindfolded and tied to my bed, maybe I should leave you here as my own personal fucktoy, would you like that baby?” He asked as he inserted two fingers into your mouth. 

You mumbled your response against the digits, your pussy getting wetter at the thought of him using you like that. You were only half kidding when you had texted your friend about it but now, with your arousal so strong, it sounded more and more enticing. Steve removed his fingers from your mouth and brought them down to your sensitive center, rubbing them up and down your slit before inserting them into your slick heat. You gasped at the intrusion and felt your hips buck up in response to being filled. 

Your walls fluttered around his fingers as he began to pump them at a leisurely pace. You felt him make his way down your body to nestle himself between your spread legs and then his hot breath was fanning out over your cunt as his fingers continued to fuck you. “You look so good, pretty girl. Spread open for me like my own personal feast. God you’re so wet. I guess you like to be flogged.” He spoke, the filthy words that left his lips making you wetter than you already were. Without warning he brought his tongue to you and kitten licked your clit, sending a shockwave through your system. 

He took your clit in his mouth and sucked as he continued to work you with his fingers. You fruitlessly tugged against your restraints and bucked your hips in an attempt to get the friction you so desperately needed. 

“God sweetheart you taste better than I imagined.” Steve commented as his tongue lapped up your juices. “I bet I’ll be able to taste you on my tongue for a week.” 

“Fuck, Captain, please can I cum?” You begged, tears wetting the inside of your mask from the intensity of your session. 

“Come for me baby, let me feel you come on my fingers.” Steve commanded and that was your undoing. The knot that had been building inside of you was finally released and you came loudy around his fingers. You felt him lick you through the aftershocks. 

“Talk to me, pretty girl, how are you feeling?” Steve questioned, voice hot once again by your ear. His suit gently pressing against your overstimulated skin. “Give me a color.” He asked, pressing a gentle kiss to your jawline. 

“I’m good Captain, still Green.” You responded, coming down from your orgasm. 

“Such a good girl for your Captain. You’re doin’ so well pretty girl.” He said as he left the bed. You weren’t sure where he went until you felt his dexterous fingers undoing the ropes on your left leg. “I’m undoing the leg ropes first. And then I’m going to fuck you senseless like I’ve been wanting to do since I saw those damn text messages.” Your spent cunt clenched around nothing, as you eagerly waited for him to undo the other leg restraint. You could hear him undo the many zippers and clasps on his tac suit until the bed dipped and he was once again between your legs. 

This time skin met skin as you felt his upper thighs press between yours as he brought himself closer to you still. You felt the tip of his cock slide between your wet folds before slipping inside. The breath was stolen from your lungs at the feel of him sinking into your waiting cunt. A low moan left your mouth as you felt every perfect inch of him spreading you until he bottomed out and his hips nestled perfectly against your own. 

You felt his forehead press against your own. “Fuck you feel perfect, you know that pretty girl? My perfect little pussy.” He breathed against your mouth as he let you adjust to him. He retracted himself from you fully before swiftly filling you up again. Any noise you may have made was swallowed as he kissed you with a hunger you didn’t think was possible. What started as a slow rhythm quickly changed until he was snapping into you with a fervor akin to a madman. 

Your hips eagerly met his thrusts and soon your combined pants and skin slapping filled the room. Still blindfolded, you felt the moment his hand wrapped around your neck and squeezed just so. That had your walls flutter around him and your hips stuttered. 

“Oh you like that don’t you? You like when I choke you huh pretty girl?” He asked eagerly, his voice husky from moaning. 

“Yes, fuck, please Captain, fuck me.” You rasped out. You grunted as he brought his other hand down to press your hips into the mattress before he slammed into you at a relentless pace. Eventually, his hand left your throat to play with your bundle of nerves. 

“Come on pretty girl. Come for me.” He ordered and you were only too happy to comply. You came hard around him, enough that you saw stars behind the blindfold and Steve let out a string of curses and praises for you as he pulled out of you and you felt his cum paint your stomach. 

You had a moment to catch your breath as you heard Steve pad over to what you assumed was the bathroom. He came back and placed a warm washcloth against your skin, cleaning up the combined mess you both made. Then you felt his hands move up to untie the blindfold around your eyes. You squinted into the low light of the room and were shocked to see Steve bare chested and glistening with sweat before you. 

“Hi.” You murmured shyly, finding that some of your confidence had left you along with the blindfold. Seeing him like this, because of you, because of what you had done, somehow cemented this moment in reality. There was no turning back now. 

“Hi yourself, how do you feel?” He asked as he undid the ropes around your wrists. 

“I um wow, I feel great.” You said and realized it was true. In the afterglow of the scene you felt amazing. Sexy and empowered and utterly spent but undeniably amazing. 

“You did great.” Steve assured you as he took lotion into his hands and massaged the areas on your wrists and ankles where the ropes had been. He placed a gentle kiss on each palm when he was done and went to get you a glass of water. “Drink all of this.” 

You took the glass from his hands and drank deep. Appreciating the cool feeling of the water as it slid down the column of your throat, you didn’t realize how thirsty you had become. You finished the glass and handed it back to Steve, who placed it on one of his bedside tables. 

“Good girl.” He praised and you felt yourself blush in response. He noticed. “Do you like being praised, sweetheart?” 

“Yes Captain.” You nodded. 

“I’ll keep that in mind.” He replied as he helped you into one of his shirts and placed you underneath the covers. He rested beside you and wrapped you in his strong arms. “You did so well today for your first time. It wasn’t too much for you was it?” 

“No, I really liked it.” You reassured him. He pressed a gentle kiss to your forehead with a promise to discuss it more after you slept some.

#steve rogers x reader #steve x reader #captain america x reader #steve rogers fanfic #mcu fanfic #avengers fanfic #reader insert

[theonewiththefanfics]

Come Back To Me (one-shot)

Synopsis: Bucky Barnes has gone through hell and back to reach his happiness, and his happiness came in the form of the love of his life. But what happens when she’s ripped away? What happens when she comes back and can no longer be happy herself? How does he get her back

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x f!Reader

Genre: AAAAANNNNNGGGGGSSSTTT, sooooo much angst. Lil bit of fluff as well (also, we’re gonna pretend like Endgame didn’t really happen, and WandaVision wasn’t as emotionally devastating), smut

Warnings: extreme sadness, depression, refusal to eat, unprotected sex, allusion to ra*e, but not the act. if there is anything else, please let me know and message me :) (MINIMALLY EDITED)

Word count: 9301 (it gon be a ride)

Bucky’s been scared many times in his life before. He wouldn’t admit that out loud, but most of the time, even as the Winter Soldier, he was terrified. Afraid to fail and of the consequences that would follow, afraid to succeed and have another person’s blood on his hands, afraid to look in the mirror, for the face staring back at him wasn’t quite his own, and even afraid to sleep in the dark, terrified the spirits of his victims would come out for revenge. But he’s never been as scared as he was in that moment, pointing a gun at the head of the love of his life, while she did the same, only without any clue as to who Bucky was.

           His mind was still processing how they’d gotten in that position, and it refused to accept it, because nothing, not a single thing had clued him in on how that day could turn south so quickly.

           It had started off as usual with Bucky’s flesh hand sliding down Y/N’s naked spine, as she had her face pressed against his toned chest, small snores escaping into the air, while a small dribble of drool trickled down the corner of her mouth.

           Bucky couldn’t help the smile lifting up his lips. It was moments like those, he believed in good things. 5 AM, the New York sky dark and without a trace of morning light probably until 8 AM, with his favourite person in the world pressed up against his side, soaking up his warmth, leeching it off without any shame after having been satisfied (or at least he hoped so) by his tongue, fingers and, well, other things as well.

           Y/N shifted a bit, trailing her palm up to his abs and settling in the middle of his chest to feel his strong heartbeat. Bucky laid his palm over hers. Even in her sleep, she didn’t hesitate to entwine their fingers and bring them under her chin, closer to her, as if she needed him next to her at all times.

           He felt bad, he truly did, as he squeezed Y/N’s side, making her frown. “You gotta wake up, dollface. We gotta get ready.”

           “Dunantdo,” she mumbled, and if Bucky hadn’t been there to take care of her drunken ass more times than he could count, he wouldn’t have been able to decipher her slurred words as “don’t want to.”

           “I know.” He chuckled. “And believe me, there’s nothing in this world I’d wanna do more than lay here with you… well maybe go down on you a few more times at some point as well, but the mission won’t happen on its own.”

           Bucky felt her chest rumble against his, as she laughed. “Oh, I wouldn’t mind you going down on me, mission and all.” Her words were clearer, but still laced with sleep, and muffled by his skin while he felt her calves run against his as she stretched out.

           “I know you don’t. The missing hair chunks on my head prove that.”

           “Hey!” she slapped his chest but soothing it immediately blearily looking at him with a pout. “I didn’t pull that hard!”

           “I’m not complaining, sweetheart.” He pressed a kiss against the top of her head. “In fact, if you ever stop doing that, I will make sure you regret it, but unfortunately we don’t have time for a rendezvous. Jet’s gonna be ready in an hour.”

           Finally, after having accepted the fact she won’t get any more sleep, Y/N lifted herself to rest on her elbow right next to Bucky’s ribs and opened her Y/E/C sleep-filled eyes to look into his cerulean ones. “We can still squeeze in a quickie if we hop into the shower together.”

           “We can,” Bucky hummed, metal fingers lifting up to cup her cheek and place a strand of unruly hair behind her ear. “But you know a quickie for us is never quick.”

           Y/N let out a scoff and pushed away from their fluffy duvet, making her shiver as she placed her feet on the cold floor. “And whose fault is that? You’re the one with the super-soldier stamina.”

           “And you,” he pinched her ass making her squeal before giving him the middle finger and taking the red Henley she’d so happily taken off his body the night before only to put it on herself, “are the completely irresistible one. Can you blame me for wanting to spend eternity between those two legs in every way possible?”

           The smile she threw him over her shoulder was nothing short of wicked, but instead of joining him in the warm embrace of the bed, Y/N made her way to the bathroom. “Keep talking, Mr Charmer. Might just get you what you want.”

           Bucky was happy about having super speed as well with how quickly he hopped out of the bed and pressed her against the cold tile wall.

           ***

           Much to Steve’s annoyance, although they were barely fifteen minutes late, Bucky and Y/N were late, and when he saw the smug grins both of them sported, he genuinely thought his eyes would get stuck at the back of his head with the hard roll he gave to them.

           “As a new policy,” he started, flipping over the mission file, “I’m putting you two on a celibate streak.”

           Y/N raised an eyebrow, plopping down on one of the metal benches as the Quinjet lifted in the air. “Really, Steve? Do you truly want to deal with Bucky like that? Cause I know, I don’t.”

           “Well, your fondueing is disrupting the schedule.”

           “Oh relax,” Nat butted in, throwing Y/N a chocolate bar, given how no one had had time to eat proper breakfast. “It’s not like the HYDRA base was going to suddenly disappear.” 

           “It could’ve,” the blond super soldier countered.

           Nat rolled her eyes, not bothering to hide the smile she had on her face. “Which is why we have an inside man, who as of three minutes ago has confirmed – they’re still there. And by the looks of it, not even trying to run.”

           Bucky’s arm slung around Y/N’s shoulder and pulled her closer. “See? Everything’s still on track. Besides, from what I heard from Sam, he’s loving the whole under-cover thing so we were doing him a favour.”

           Tony had gotten out of the pilot’s seat and joined in on everyone discussing Y/N’s and Bucky’s sex life, so that was her cue to switch the comms in her ear from ‘communication’ setting to the ‘music’ setting, leaning against Bucky’s side and closing her eyes, cashing in on those lost sleep minutes she’d spent in the shower with her lover. 

           When they had about forty minutes left in the air, Bucky once more woke Y/N up as she’d fallen asleep while Steve and Tony went over the last briefing. 

“Bucky and I will take the South-side entrance,” Steve said, pointing at the holographic map Tony had pulled up. “Y/N, Nat and Wanda you take the East, and go as easy as you can, Red.” Steve nudged his chin towards Wanda who nodded. “Just because you can bend reality doesn’t mean you can bend your health. That’s where the main intel storage unit. Get as much as you can and get out. Tony will take the air and wait until Sam joins before blowing everything up. Clint, Bruce and Thor have all checked in, and are already in their positions on the ground as blitz attack. Once F.R.I.D.A.Y has confirmed everyone’s location away from the blast zone Tony will detonate the bombs Sam has set up inside. Got it?”

Affirmative nods came from everyone on board, as they went to do final checks on their gear and equipment.

“Be careful out there, alright?” Bucky mumbled against Y/N’s neck as she double and triple checked her ammunition count, strapping a sword to her back as well, just in case. Her obsession with Medieval fantasy shows giving her a reason to make Tony pay for her lessons. 

           “We’re gonna be fine,” Y/N gently patted Bucky’s cheek before giving him a peck on the cheek as he wrapped two strong hands around her waist. “We always are.”

           But where typically she was right (most of the time), it was in that instance where she couldn’t be further from the truth if she’d tried. 

           Despite having Sam on the inside and him having gone through great lengths to make the infiltration as easy as possible, getting inside the building had been suspiciously easy, and that had set off everyone’s alarm bells, but knowing how important gathering the information was, they pressed on, keeping the thought that it could be a trap at the back of their minds at all times. 

           Thor, Bruce and Clint had started their ground attack two minutes before the rest had joined, with Vision guiding and disabling every system possible from back at the tower, so Tony and F.R.I.D.A.Y could put all of their focus on retaliating against the helacarriers coming their way. 

           “Cap, we’re in,” Natasha announced, ducking through the door, as Wanda covered her six, and Y/N lead the way in front, bullet shells flying out from her rifle. 

           Their comms crackled with echoes of gunfire outside as Tony lead them through the place right until they got to the main room where the whole system mainframe resided in.

           “Five-minute countdown commenced,” Y/N said it out loud to inform the rest of their team, as she stood behind Wanda, who’d created a red shield of magic, keeping the assault away and them inside the room.

           Five minutes until they had to get out of the building because in eight minutes time Tony and Vision, having infiltrated HYDRA’s system would blow everything to bits. If that failed, Wanda was there to provide a safety dome for the three of them, but it was just as a failsafe. Even though she now had full control of her powers, understood them better than ever, taking in a blast that will level a whole ass building was still a lot and there was no guarantee bricks and beams wouldn’t just settle right over them to then fall on top the women, she was still recuperating from a rival witch attack and it had taken out a bit more energy from her than usual.

           “How’s it looking over on your end, Vis?” Wanda asked through the comms, connecting back to the rest of the team in the tower.

           “The files are coming in, but too slowly,” his smooth voice invaded everyone’s earpieces. “And unfortunately F.R.I.D.A.Y’s mainframe won’t allow for a faster download, as she needs to scan everything for viruses.”

           “Should’ve used a flash-drive,” Y/N mumbled under her breath as she watched the HYDRA agents line outside the room, creating a two-level firing squad basically. 

           “Last time we did that, the files corrupted the drive and then erased themselves,” Tony butted in, then groaned as something hard hit him. “And no one needs to hear you complain about losing the six seasons of Brooklyn Nine-Nine again.”

           Y/N just rolled her eyes and steadied her rifle against her shoulder once Nat gave the go-sign. Then something beeped through everyone’s comms. The three-minute countdown before the whole building went down.

           “We’re barely at seventy-six percent,” Nat’s tone was calm, but the frustration didn’t go unnoticed by others.

           “Plan B then.” Wanda changed her stance a bit, but not by much as to not arouse any suspicion from the agents. If they could be taken out by the blast instead of her it’d be less energy used on her part.

           “Are you sure?” Sam finally butted in, having gotten in contact with Bucky who’d given him a comm linked just with their interface. “We can try and delay the blast,” Sam said right as Bucky commanded him to do so.

           “No,” Wanda stated. There were already at the two-minute mark. “Get out. We’ll take cover once the files are ours.”

           “Y/N,” she heard her lover start, but she just shook her head, even though he couldn’t see it. 

           “Wanda’s right. Just be here to pull us out from the rubble. I have no want to climb through the wreckage.”

           A deep, long, exasperated sigh echoed in her ears, and it made her smile. “You know, sometimes I really hate you.”

           “Love you too, hot stuff.”

           A chorus of gags followed shortly after their little display of affection, and even though they were nowhere near one another they rolled their eyes almost at the exact same time, as Vision told Wanda to stay safe.

           “You owe me a foot massage, Vis.”

           “Gross.” Y/N chuckled.

           Wanda just threw her a smirk. “Imagine how we all feel about you and Bucky.”

           “Okay, we’re down to sixty seconds!” Tony said, making Y/N nervously glance back at Nat. 

           The assassin just shook her head. “Eighty-seven percent.”

           She gritted her teeth. If the building went out before they got the files they’d be stuck with just what they had. “F.R.I.D.A.Y, please speed up a bit, the place is about to get blown to bits.”

           “Rerouting the files to a different server,” the A.I. was immediately on it. “Will have to do the scan later.”

           “Thirty seconds, guys!” Steve shouted as whoever was still near the base scrambled to get out.

           Nat’s head whipped back to the computer screen. “Almost there.”

           But the whole thing seemed to have made the HYDRA agents realise something was amiss, yet it was too late for them. As Sam counted off the last five seconds, Natasha rushed to the other two women, grabbing them by their waists and crouching down while Wanda created a red dome of magic, explosions shaking the whole house.

           For a second the rumbling felt more like someone shaking you awake from a deep sleep until the walls of the room exploded, raining fire, brick and metal down on them. 

           That would’ve been fine if not for the fact that the floor underneath them decided to disappear as well, an array of curses coming from their mouths as Wanda immediately rounded out the shield while the rest of their teammates kept nagging them to respond.

           “Y/N, I swear to everything you hold dear, I will kill you myself if you die,” Bucky pretty much screamed, while she groaned as the sudden shift in balance had made her hit herself in the ribs with the rifle.

           She gritted her teeth, as Wanda used more of her powers to stabilise them. “We’re fine,” she responded. “No need to bring in the cavalry yet.”

           A deep sigh from what seemed like everyone echoed in her earpiece, and when Wanda was sure there’d be no second shockwaves from the blast or no debris that could fall right on top of them where she’d need to take her focus away, she flew the three women out of the ruined building and onto the grassy knoll where the team stood waiting. 

           Bucky was instantly next to Y/N, pulling her into his body and her lips against his once Wanda released her from the energy bubble. 

           “God, you’re disgusting,” Sam mumbled, and it was followed by a small yelp when someone hit him in the side.

           Y/N threw him a mischievous grin when she pulled away. “Don’t be a Bitter Betty. The offer to set you up still stands.”

           Sam cackled, as everyone had now regrouped and together were marching away to where the jet sat disguised between the trees. “Hard pass. You’re a worse matchmaker than Steve.”

           “Hey! Amelia was an amazing girl.”

           “She is except for the fact that she’s not interested in men.”

           Steve’s cheeks reddened up a bit, as Tony gave him a sympathetic pat. “ ‘S not my business to ask what people’s sexuality is. And blame yourself. You’re the one who’s called Sam.”

           “Oh, don’t you even –“ but his words were cut off midway as gunfire rained down on them from the sky.

           Instantly Wanda threw up a shield once more, Bucky going to cover Y/N with his body, but HYDRA opening fire from the top had left their sides unprotected, and a well-aimed shot from a bazooka ripped everyone apart. 

           The blast was minimised thanks to Wanda and her quickly directing a part of her magic to contain it, but the missile still threw them away.

           Y/N’s head was ringing, and she wasn’t sure if it was because of the loud noise of the blast, because of her having hit her head against a tree trunk, or because of all the screams from her teammates, yet she had zero time to recuperate as an agent rushed towards her, knives ready for a kill.

           The first one embedded itself inside the tree, and barely not inside her head, as she moved to the side in the last minute, but a small sting still crept along the side of her head where he’d managed to split the skin.

           She was up and rolling away, grabbing one of her own knives from the side of her leg, finally unsheathing her sword. There was no time to put more clips in her guns.

           The first agent was quick work for Y/N, I mean he only three more knives left, and he’d been one of the unlucky ones to stand next to the building when it went off, so the shrapnel had ripped a piece of his Kevlar open giving her the perfect place to put her sword in, but the next ten were not as easy.

           She was worn out, tired from having experienced two explosions and some of the agents were new backup, which meant they had more strength and energy, but she wasn’t going to let them get the best of her. 

           At the back of her mind, Y/N heard everyone chiming in as to where they were, how many people were after them if they needed backup, but mostly Y/N heard Bucky’s calls that he was coming to get her, even though she hadn’t requested help, she was too busy dodging bullets and knives to even respond. 

           She was human, she needed help, she wanted help, but then something odd occurred to her – most, from what she’d heard through the comms, were fighting maybe four to five people at a time, with the exception of Wanda, Tony, Thor and Hulk who had tanks and cars going after them, while Y/N had a group of twenty to twenty-five people to manage.

           It was an ambush, it dawned on her.

           She wanted to scream at herself ‘No shit, the whole thing is an ambush’, but it was an ambush of Y/N specifically, which was odd given how she was pretty much one of the few who had no direct ties to HYDRA, but that one moment of confusion was enough for someone to land a slice to the side where her own suit had a hole in it. 

           “Oh, we don’t want you,” a voice went through her comms that she didn’t recognise. It was muffled as if someone was whispering through someone else’s mic. “But we’ll hurt you more than ever.”

           An unsettling quiet settled around before she clearly recognised Bucky breathing out a ‘no’ and then a panicked ‘Y/N!’ rip through his throat. Her head whipped to see one of the most frightening sights of her life that will forever be ingrained in her mind.

           Bucky was laying on the ground, completely paralysed without the ability to even flex a muscle, blue eyes turned towards her in terror and helplessness as he watched while nine more agents stormed towards her.

           She was capable, of course. He’d even experienced how capable the girl was on his own skin, and it had left his super-soldier skin bruised and battered for a few days. But right now, she was tired, she had zero ammo left, all of her knives were embedded in the heads or chests of other assailants and somewhere along the way her sword had snapped in half, leaving her with a jagged piece of steel, which was also protruding out from someone’s chest. Y/N had nothing, but her punches and kicks left. And even she knew there was no way she’d last long enough to get back to the jet in one piece.

           So, gathering whatever strength remained in her body, Y/N retaliated on last time. She heard people shouting that they were coming for her, and for a moment she truly believed so when a red ball of magic hit a group of seven agents knocking them down, but when Y/N’s eyes flitted to where it’d come from, she saw the agents subdue Wanda, as they'd somehow managed to put an electroshock collar around her neck. She fell to her knees gasping in pain.

           All of it, Y/N realised, every single thing that had happened had been a distraction. They’d split them apart, and the Avengers had most likely helped HYDRA accomplish their goal when the bomb went off. 

           For a moment she wondered why’d they’d want to take her, why not take their ‘weapons’ back, but just as quickly came the realisation of their words.

           Someone grabbed her by the ankle, yanking her down. 

           Y/N saw stars behind her eyelids, and her teeth clanked together. She was lucky her tongue hadn’t been between them. 

           Bucky screamed as if someone was ripping his heart from his chest.

           A gun hit her on the head.

           And then everything went black.

***

                      Bucky was going insane. He’d trade having his brain being put through the meatgrinder for seventy years once again if that meant Y/N was back with him, but the empty space in his bed, the unused shampoo and conditioner bottles, the dirty cup in the sink told him otherwise. She was gone, and he couldn’t do anything about it. 

           For two weeks he was basically a zombie, barely eating and functioning, spending most of his time by the interrogation room’s computer, following up on dead-end leads and any breadcrumb he could find, yet every single time he thought he’d gotten something as if life was mocking him, it turned into dust, just like his hope slowly was. 

           There was pretty much no one else but him, Sam and Wanda left in the tower, as the rest had split off into teams to go and search every left-over HYDRA base in the world. The only reason he wasn’t out there was because Steve had benched him.

“You’re compromised,” he’d said. Bucky couldn’t say he wasn’t.

Sam had stayed behind because during his last raid he’d gotten hit by some gas, rendering him pretty much useless for half a week, and no one felt comfortable enough to ask him to put his life on the line before a full recovery.

And Wanda… well, Wanda wasn’t taking the whole thing too great either, but she was still functioning, so she was just waiting for the jet to come in and fly her out to Serbia with Vision for a potential lead on Y/N.

Defeated for the night, he grabbed the coffee cup that once had been filled and trudged his way to the kitchen area. God, fucking hell, how much did it hurt to even breathe. 

           Just as he was about to pour himself another cup of the burning black liquid, all of his senses went haywire, and he spun around to look at the hallway of the living room. He instantly recognised the shadow standing in the middle of it, how the shape curved and sloped in such a familiar way. How could he not, when that shadow belonged to the woman, he intended to spend the rest of his life with, when his hands had memorised each and every way she was formed.

           “Dollface?” his voice cracked at the end, but when she entered the light, instead of warmth filling his heart at the relief of her being back, ice-cold fear rushed through him at the sight of the black muzzle across her nose and mouth, not to even mention the HYDRA symbol in the middle of the chest of her tactical suit. 

           The first shot rang out right after he blinked, giving him barely enough time to dodge it, but Y/N was already on the move rushing towards him and kicking her leg out so that her knee would connect with Bucky’s chin. 

           A sickening crunch echoed through the room, as his head met the marble floor, bright lights flashing behind his eyes. He could even feel his teeth vibrate from the impact. It was this second which he used to somewhat regain a sense of place, that Y/N used to straddle him down, hand going behind her back to pull out a gun, but Bucky knew her. He knew her moves and how she left her left side open.

           When his forehead connected to Y/N’s nose, he almost vomited at the feeling of bone-crunching against his skin, but it gave him enough time to deliver a blow to her side, disarming her before grabbing her bicep and pulling her arm behind her back, his own metal appendage wrapping around her shoulders and pulling her flush against him. 

           “Come on, sweetheart!” he was pleading, but his grip unyielding to her struggles. “Fight this. I know you can.”

           But to his horror, HYDRA had dug their nails into her mind deeper than he ever thought was possible, as she smashed the back of her head against his nose once more, red blood spilling everywhere.

           He staggered back, palm cradling his face, but he still had one free to block the fist that was coming in his direction. This caught her off guard for a millisecond, but not long enough for Bucky to do anything, as she smashed her foot against his knee, bringing him down, yet he’d expected it, using the position to his advantage and grabbing Y/N behind the legs, yanking her towards him, and making her back hit hard against the floor, dizzying and knocking the air out of the woman.

           It took him three seconds to slide over to the gun she’d discarded and to stand up, and it took three seconds for her to flip herself up and aim the gun that’d still been strapped to her thigh.

           Both of them were shaking, but both for different reasons. Bucky was shaking because he was making the love of his life look down the barrel of a gun, while she was shaking because the only thought on her mind was about if she didn’t finish the mission, the consequences would be more horrible than anything HYDRA had done to her before.

           “I don’t want to hurt you! Please snap out of it!” he hollered but didn’t lower his weapon. It went against all of his instincts to be in that position, even when the two sparred, Bucky, to Y/N’s annoyance who was hoping for a real fight, pulled his punches. It was unnatural for him to even consider harming her.

           She cocked her gun, didn’t even hesitate. 

           “Sorry, can’t do that. You’re my mission.”

           Bucky took in one last breath.

           It hitched in his throat.

           He blinked away the tears pooling at his bottom lashes.

He’d never pull the trigger. 

           She steadied her aim.

           Bucky closed his eyes.

           But the bullet never came. At least not for him.

The yelp of pain made him open his eyes just to see Y/N’s body jerk to the side and drop to her knee, hand clutching at her shoulder, with Sam behind her, his own gun aimed at her with a little stream of smoke coming out of the barrel. 

Yet the second her shock passed Y/N swiftly turned to Sam, gun in her usable palm when her body seized up, and she fell to the ground unconscious. 

           Bucky was panting, as he looked to see Redwing, two blue lights on each side dying out, as it deactivated the tasers. It took him a second to realize what had happened, but then he was by Y/N’s side, pulling her body up to cradle against his own.

           “What the hell, Sam?!” Bucky yelled, hovering his left hand over Y/N’s mouth. When the metal fogged over, his whole frame literally shuddered in relief, as he went on to the next job – stopping the bleeding before her breathing stopped.

           “She was gonna put a bullet between your eyes!”

           “You didn’t have to shoot her!”

           “Oh, I’m sorry,” Sam mocked, dropping to his knees and shredding apart a kitchen towel to press against the wound. “Would you have rather had your brains splattered against the floor?”

           “You had Redwing taser her! That was enough!”

           “If I hadn’t shot her, Redwing wouldn’t have been able to taser her.”

           He hated the fact wounding Y/N had been a necessary step in subduing her. No, Bucky told himself, not her. Not his Y/N, but whoever HYDRA had placed in her mind.

           As gently as possible, he scooped up her body and with Sam in tow made his way to the med bay.

           F.R.I.D.A.Y had alerted the medical staff of the situation, so they were ready when Bucky came in. Instantly two nurses took his girl from his arms and laid her down on a gurney, Helen Cho stepping up with surgical gloves.

           “A through and through in the shoulder,” she remarked more for the medical records than anyone else. “She’ll have a few painful weeks of recovery, but nothing fatal.”

           Bucky nodded in acknowledgement, but still, he didn’t let anyone touch Y/N without him being beside her. As Helen patched up her shoulder and strapped her down on the cell bed, he was still there beside her, both hands clutching onto her palm, not moving an inch away.

           A little while after Helen had left, he felt a presence hovering behind him, and Sam stepped into the room, leaning against the wall, brown eyes looking over Y/N.

           “How is she?”

           Bucky sighed, rubbing his thumb over her knuckles. They were cracked and on the verge of bleeding despite the regenerative cream, Dr Cho had applied. “Asleep,” he mumbled. “So that’s better, I guess. Gives her time to heal.”

           He heard Sam shuffle around a bit, and then he entered Bucky’s peripheral as he sat down on a chair next to the bed.“It took them thirty years to break you, yet it took them two weeks to break her…” Sam said biting on his lip, and the statement made anger course through Bucky’s veins.

           “Are you seriously calling her fucking weak?” He snapped looking at his fellow Avenger. “You have no idea what kind of torture they pu-“

           “I’m not calling her weak,” Sam interrupted. “Y/N is one of the strongest people out there. What I’m saying is – back then it took them years to break a person… now it took them barely fourteen days… what else have they ‘improved’ on?”

           The thought of Y/N having her mind ripped apart and then put back together as if she was some ragdoll made bile rise in Bucky’s throat, and it didn’t settle when he thought of how far that horrid machine had come since he’d been in one. 

           But as much as Bucky wanted revenge, as much as he wanted to destroy HYDRA, to make sure what happened to Y/N never happens again to anyone else, let alone if what Sam implied was true, he couldn’t leave her, not when she would need a familiar face the most. 

           He gulped, closing his eyes and tightening his grip on her hand to steady himself. Just the thought of her in all that pain made him go to the edge of breaking apart. “She’s gonna be alright, isn’t she?” If there was one thing Bucky appreciated from Sam it was his honesty.

           “In the long run most likely. You’d be the proof of that…” Sam sighed. “But first, we gotta make sure she doesn’t shut people out.”

           But that was most definitely easier said than done, given how the second Y/N woke up, which was about a day later after being knocked-out cold when she realised what had happened, it was not like a wall had magically appeared between her and anyone from the team, but a fucking fortress surrounded by an impenetrable mountainous barrier, and she was the only citizen in that mind castle. And Bucky was the first one behind the door.

           It broke his heart to see Y/N pretty much shut down. She refused to eat, barely drank the water provided, and couldn’t sleep one bit, yet what hurt most was she absolutely rejected even the thought of going back to their shared room, and instead stayed in her barren cell, white walls, with a thin blanket and a paper-like pillow. It got so bad they had to put her on an IV drip so she wouldn’t waste away. But it didn’t matter to her. She was like a ragdoll.

           It was about five days later when she said her first words. Y/N had her head in her hands, matted Y/H/C strands spilling between her fingers, as her nails dug deeper into her skull. That’s the position she’d been sitting in for the past five hours, not even bothering to lift her eyes as a paper plate with a meal, a single plastic spoon next to it and a paper cup of water was slid through the opening at the bottom of her cell door. She wasn’t hungry anyway. In fact, what she really wanted was to disappear from the surface of the earth, for the ground to open and be swallowed by molten lava or have a sharknado crash in and get eaten by a great white.

           “How’re you feeling?” Sam asked arms crossed as he leaned against the entrance to the door. He’d been asking that since the first time she opened her eyes, but never received a response, so when the scoff she let out was almost inaudible, but he still picked up on it, he straightened out. “Just peachy,” Y/N mumbled. “Absolutely fantastic. Ten out of ten would recommend.”

           “Y/N…”

           He really didn’t have anything to say. I mean what could you possibly say… but he had to at least try, given how miserable Bucky was. He’d heard him sob so loud through two closed doors and a running shower, that he had to do something.

           Sam swallowed hard before entering the room and cautiously, keeping as much space as possible between the two, sat down next to Y/N. He wasn’t afraid of her. He could never be. But he knew she needed to let him closer on her own terms. “You can’t keep going like this. You can’t keep everything in. If you don’t wanna talk to the shrink, it’s fine, but at least talk to someone else…”

           “I am talking to you.”

           “Yes, but you know who I mean.”

“How am I supposed to even look at him?” Her head shot up, and tears threatened to spill down her face. “How am I supposed to talk to him? To touch him, knowing I almost killed him.”

“It wasn’t you.”

“But it was!” The words were a hiss. “It was me. I understood everything I was doing, I knew who he was, I knew what we were to one another, yet…” she choked in the middle of the sentence, not wanting to say the truth. “I wasn’t going to hesitate. I was going to kill him. If you hadn’t gotten involved, one more second and Bucky would’ve been dead. Because of me.”

“HYDRA messed with your brain,” Sam stated. “I know that everyone knows that and Bucky most of all. Why do you think he couldn’t pull the trigger?”

“Because he’s an idiot.”

“No, because he’s been in the exact same situation.”

She bit her lip. All her brain was doing was screaming that Sam was right, to listen to him, he knew what he was talking about, but the guilt, the absolutely corrosive horror at herself for what she was going to do wouldn’t let common sense come through. “I just.” Y/N choked and then cleared her throat. “Just tell him I don’t want to see him. I – I can’t see him.”

Sam did know heartbreak. He’d felt it when his first girlfriend had broken up with him, he’d felt it in the army when his friends lost limbs and lives, and now he felt it looking at two of the people he’d grown closest to struggle to find one another and themselves.

He cleared his throat standing up and wiping hind palms down his thighs. “Wanda is also – “

But Y/N didn’t let him finish the sentence. “No.” She shook her head. “No one. Please.” She tucked her face against her knees. “I just wanna be alone.”

And so he left her alone. In fact, everyone did so. 

For a whole month, the usually lively tower was a glass structure of sombre and pain. Everyone was hurting. Wanda had retreated to her room, sitcoms on the rerun, Vision always by her side as she tried to manage the sadness of one of her dearest friends going through such a tough time and the guilt of not being able to help Y/N, to save her from that pain. Nat and Clint along with Tony had locked themselves in one of the lower levels of the tower analysing the data she’d gathered. They needed to occupy themselves with something, otherwise, they’d be overcome by their own thoughts and they were too dark to manage at that moment. Bruce and Thor had relegated themselves to the lab doing experiment after experiment, trying to find out how HYDRA had managed to do such damage to Y/N. 

Steve, however… Steve was doing quite bad. He felt probably the most amount of guilt than the rest of his teammates. He’d taken up the role of the leader, he was supposed to make sure everyone stayed safe. Yes, they were the most skilled people in the world, but they trusted him to make the best calls. And him not having taken into account a blitz attack from HYDRA after their blitz attack had broken two of his friends because Bucky was doing just as bad as Y/N, if not even worse.

He wouldn’t sleep, he couldn’t; Steve heard his cries each night until, at twelve of one AM, they’d cease, and he’d make his way to the cells. Steve had told Y/N a week after she’d been brought back that there was no reason for her to stay in there. She’d just sat on the bed, arms around her knees and staring at the wall. She didn’t go back to her room. 

But each night Bucky would sit by the glass doors and look at the frame of the love of his life, curled underneath a white duvet, a single pillow underneath her head (Y/N loved pillows, she couldn’t sleep without at least four of them) body in a foetal position. She looked so broken. She was. And because of that, so was he.

It was about three AM at night, when his routine was shaken up by none other than Y/N. Typically she’d sleep through the night not even stirring, slipping into the cot at nine PM and then waking up at six AM when Helen came in to switch her IV. She was eating now, but still too little for it to be enough. 

However, that night she was stirred awake by the feeling of someone watching her, not the camera that was always on but by human eyes.

That was the first time she’d seen Bucky since having woken up and regaining control of her body.

Her breath hitched when their eyes met, and his whole body straightened out. Y/N remained under the covers, while Bucky sat by the doors still. His palm pressed against the glass.

“Hi, doll.”

Two words, but that was enough for the dam to break. Tears spilt down her face, and without a second to spare Bucky had rushed inside and laid down next to her, strong arms weaving around her shaking body, as his own pain merged with hers.

All Y/N could manage to say was ‘I’m so sorry,' and it became a mantra she repeated in Bucky’s chest, hoping that somehow the words would find their way and settle beneath his skin so he could understand with his whole being how much she meant them. 

           “Please.” He was close to sobbing by that point, hand moving to cup her cheek. “Please let me help.”

“I can’t, Bucky! I can’t!” Y/N was close to complete hysterics by this point. “Every time I even think about you, I remember the emptiness, the absolute numbness that was in me, when I pointed a gun at your face, and I meant to kill you! I was going to pull the trigger, if not for Sam… So,” she gulped looking down at the ground, at their feet. “Tell me how the hell am I supposed to let you anywhere near me when I’m terrified of myself.”

           The grip he had on her face, was tight, strong and sure. “Because it wasn’t you. I know what it’s like to have your brain scrambled around and rearranged with false truths and present them as real… but the thing is – they’re not. And you taught me that. You were the one who made me realise it, dollface. Now let me do the same for you.”

           “I can’t even look at myself in the mirror because every time I do, I see that – that monster staring back at me.”

           “Reflections are deceiving,” Bucky whispered, pressing his forehead against hers. “Mirrors can’t and will never show the truth. It’s a twisted, flipped and made-up version of us, and we can’t allow ourselves to believe it. It’s not us.”

           And despite the pain, despite the guilt and anxiousness, Y/N chuckled, letting out a small sound of happiness for the first time in a while. “When did you get so wise, Gandalf?”

           She could feel the relief that flooded Bucky’s body slowly seep into her own. “Well, re-reading ‘The Hobbit’ helped… but more so you. You taught me that. You made me realise the man that haunts my nightmares might have my face, but it’s not me. He’s not me and I’m not him.”

           “Will you…” Her voice shook as she said the words as if there was a possibility, he could say no. “Will you help me?”

           “You never, ever have to ask for help. I’m always here for you. Whatever you need, I’m always here. I’m so sorry, so sorry you had to go through that.”

           And for the first time in six weeks did Bucky get to hug Y/N. Feeling her body melt into his almost made him have a breakdown of his own, as she wrapped her arms around his shoulders, and grabbed onto him like her life depended on the tightness of her grip.

           Six weeks, almost two months without Y/N in every imaginable way had almost broken Bucky to a point of no return. Had they gone longer periods of time without seeing one another? Sure, but this was different. When the person you love is right there, but more unreachable than when they’re thousands of miles away, that’s a different kind of pain. 

           She didn’t release her grip form him, as Bucky shifted and sat up, her legs moving to lace around his waist on instinct. With one hand underneath her thighs the other going to take off the IV bag from the stand, he stood up and moved through the tower, finally retreating to his room, where he took off a photo frame from the wall and hung up the medical supply while gently laying Y/N down between his sheets.

           She’d been in that position many times before in different states of undress, in different emotional states as well, but not once had she been alone there. And neither would she be alone now. 

           It was the first night Bucky slept without waking up, and when he did Y/N’s head was resting on his chest. He held her a bit tighter then.

***

           The road to recovery was slow. 

           It started with her spending her days and nights in Bucky’s room, no longer isolating herself from him. It turned to late-night talks where they just chatted about miscellaneous things, and if she felt comfortable enough, then about every heavy thing pressing on her heart. Then she ventured off to her own room, and once evening slipped inside the room of who was her neighbour. She slept next to Wanda that night.

           The next night, she and Wanda sneaked inside Nat’s bedroom, and just hung out a bit, painting their nails. When Y/N went to sleep next to Bucky, she felt as light as the light-yellow colour adorning her fingers.

           On the morning of the eleventh day of her recovery, she woke up earlier and made everyone breakfast, putting some extra chocolate chips in Sam’s pancakes. He deserved it for all the trouble he’d gone through. The smile on his lips and the kiss on her head from him meant more than any thank you he could say. 

           But it was about a month down the line, after evenings where she’d joined in on the movie nights and had discussed the gathered intelligence from other missions as well as the tactics agents should employ when Y/N took her biggest step yet.

           Bucky was laying on his bed ‘The Two Towers’ between his fingers, the metal appendage flipping the pages as gently as if they were made from butterfly wings, when Y/N came out of the bathroom, hair wet and dripping onto her nightshirt. Well, it was actually one of Bucky’s shirts, but at this point, every piece of clothing he owned belonged to her as well. Besides, in his humble opinion, she wore them better than he ever could. 

           “Buck?”

           “Yeah?” he hummed, flipping to another page.

           “Buck I – “ she took in a breath. “I want to have sex.”

           “What? Ow!” The book had slipped from his hands and the edge hit his eyebrow, making Y/N hiss, and instantly come over to try and soothe the hurt part.

           “I mean – “ Bucky stuttered much like his heart. “I’d love to. Gosh, dollface, you know I’d do anything you ever wanted me. Tell me to spend forever between your legs, and I will, but… Please don’t feel like we have to. You’re still healing, and –“

           “I want to,” Y/N was quick to quench his doubt, running a gentle finger over his brow. “I do. I – I need to feel you. I need to feel… I need to feel whole, and I haven’t in so long.”

           His hand cupped her cheek. “You are whole. You don’t need me to complete you. You don’t need anyone to complete you.”

           “I –“ She huffed, struggling to form the thought running through her brain into words. “I – I know that. At least I think so. But… but there is this part inside me, I can’t seem to heal myself, this crack that no matter how hard I try to mend just won’t do. And that’s because that part can only be filled by love. And yours is the strongest one I have in my life.”

           A tear slipped down his cheek. “Oh, doll…”

           Her legs slowly shifted so they were straddling him as Bucky leaned up in a sitting position, palms dropping to her hips and sliding underneath her PJs to touch the soft skin of her back.

           His nose skimmed against hers, and Y/N sighed at the feeling. She’d slept like that – nose to nose curled up next to Bucky – for close to a month and a half now, but the anticipation of the kiss turned her into a bundle of nerves. 

           “One word,” he breathed against her skin, pressing a kiss to her collarbone before looking deeply into her eyes. “One word and we stop.”

           And even though she wanted to say there was no doubt in her mind about doing it, she nodded. He needed the reassurance just as much as she did that if something happened, he’d be there for her.

           When Bucky’s lips met hers, it was just like the first kiss they’d shared. A bit tentative, unsure, yet filled with so much restrained passion and pure love it was overwhelming, and Y/N’s eyes immediately filled with tears.

           “Darling, let’s just not do this,” Bucky said noticing the clear pearls dripping down her cheeks, but she shook her head.

           “I just missed you so much. I missed letting you love me.”

           “Well, it’s a good thing people don’t need permission to love. I never stopped. I can’t imagine ever not loving you.”

           His mouth was on hers once again. Bucky let Y/N lead the whole time. He didn’t deny himself from exploring her body, from feeling every crook, dip, and crevice of her form, but she was always in control.

           When her shirt dropped to the floor, she was the one who started lifting it up.

           When she laid down to pull Bucky on top, she was the one who flipped them over and pulled him on top.

           Her hands skimmed the band of his boxers, and Bucky unconsciously ground against Y/N’s clothed core at the feeling, both letting out moans of relief at the friction.

           “Can you take ‘em off?” she breathed, as Bucky left beautiful marks on her neck and chest so they could bloom through the night and could be greeted by them in the morning. 

           “You sure?”

           She nodded. “Please.”

           They did it together. Y/N linked her fingers behind the fabric and pulled it down his legs while he shimmied out from the boxers and kicked it to the floor. 

           “Can I take yours off?”

           As sure as she was about everything that was going on, there was still some hesitancy in her body, and he immediately sensed it, pulling a little bit away. “Y/N…”

           When her hands went to wrap around his wrists where they rested against her hips, horror washed over Bucky like a cold shower. “Did they…?”

           “No!” Y/N was immediate to answer. “No, they didn’t… but… they said after they were done with me after they turned me into their puppet… after they’d make me hurt you, you’d never want to touch me. That, in your last moments, you’d only have hate in your heart for me, and I’d have to live with that for the rest of my life.”

           He gently put a finger underneath her chin and lifted her head. “Even when I was staring down that barrel, all I could think about was how much I love you. How I’d give my life for you even if you were the one taking it. I could never hate you.”

           A violent sob ripped through her chest. “I don’t deserve you.”

           “You deserve the world, and I’ll try to give as much of it to you as I can.”

           She couldn’t take much more of his confessions because Y/N’s chest was already as full as it could be of love, so instead, she pulled Bucky back down for a passion-filled kiss, while shimmying out from her own underwear.

           “Condom?”

           “No,” Y/N shook her head. “Not this time. Need to feel you as you are.”

           “You sure?”

           She nodded. “Helen put me back on the pill about a month ago.”

           Bucky shuddered, nodding. “Alright. Okay. But I need to make sure I don’t hurt you first.”

           Y/N was about to say he could never hurt her, when two of his fingers slipped along her folds, cutting her words off in favour of the groan of pleasure.

           “Gotta take care of my girl the right way.”

           A moan seeped into Bucky’s skin when he pushed a cold metal digit into her tight entrance. His arm had the added feature to feel things if he wanted or switch it off when he didn’t want to, which was a nice thing, especially during missions (he’d forgotten to do so one time and when a bullet bounced off, it wasn’t like a bee bumping against glass, hot pain had rippled through his whole arm, so it was a good idea on Shuri’s part), but this time it was on, and the absolutely exquisite pressure and warmth that squeezed around his digits was enough to make him grind against the mattress to alleviate his own growing pressure.

           “Bucky, please,” Y/N practically mewled, eyes screwed shut, nails digging into his skin, making him groan in pleasure. He’d forgotten how delicious the sounds were and how close to the edge just the feeling of her nails marking half-moons into his back could bring him. 

           “Fuck,” he swore leaning up to kiss her once more, while he increased the speed of which his fingers were going in and out of her, while his thumb rubbed circles around her clit, and when he hotly breathed against her neck to ‘soak him all down to his elbows’ Y/N’s eyes rolled to the back of her head and she arched up from the bed as an orgasm shattered her world.

           Gently he coaxed her through the orgasm while muttering praises against her mouth.

           “You’re so beautiful,” Bucky sighed leaning to rest on his elbows. “So fucking gorgeous.”

           Y/N smiled, stroking his cheek. “You’re beautiful too, Bucky. More than you’ll ever know or will let yourself believe me.”

           The crooked smirk which he threw her reminded the one from Steve’s tales of him and his skirt-chasing days. “Guess you’ll have to convince me.”

           “With pleasure.”

           Her hand snaked down to where he’d been running the tip of his cock between her folds, before gently pressing him down so he could easily slide inside. When he was sheeted a moan of satisfaction came from both of them.

           It was like homecoming. Like curling up in a warm bed on a cold winter’s night. It was just right.

           “God, I could stay like this forever.” Bucky tucked a strand of hair behind Y/N’s ear.

           “We have forever and then some.”

           A look she could not figure out crossed his face. It was like absolute joy mixed with fear and terror. “You promise?”

           Y/N kissed him, trying to pour all of her love into the single act. “With everything I have in me.”

           He took that as the cue that he could move and experimentally rolled his hips towards hers. Bit by bit he picked up the pace, breaths turning into pants broken up by moans, sweat beading along his skin, a small burn appearing in his knees, but even that discomfort couldn’t overshadow the heavenly pleasure rippling through his veins.

           She’d always been the epitome of beauty and love, that’s how completely Bucky had fallen for her, and he could only hope he was the same for her. 

           “Bucky,” she choked out. “So close.”

           “Yeah?” His vision was starting to go white at the edges.

           “Mhm – ohh!” The confirmation turned into a squeal when he hit just that right spot, he concentrated all his thrusts to match it, and soon enough both of them were falling over the edge, clinging onto the other as if they were the last lifeline that existed for them.

           “Hey,” Bucky cooed, opening his eyes and seeing how furrowed Y/N’s brow was, how hard she was fighting to resurface. “Come back to me. Come back, doll.”

           Slowly, Y/N’s breathing evened out, her trembling became small shudders from the aftershock of the pleasure, and her lids fluttered, gaze meeting his.

           She’d come back.

           She’d always come back to her home.

           To Bucky.

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A/N: My Bucky boiiiii! I’m back! hope y’all like this rollercoaster :)

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[waiting4inspiration]

In the Dark XVI: Plans

Summary: You get back to the compound, explain things to Steve, and tell him what you’re plan is to end the war. Nat goes to Bucky’s coven to look for him. 

Warnings: angstish, fluff, strong language, mentions of arranged marriage, vampire/werewolf au, soulmate au, mentions of a war

Word Count: 2,224

In the Dark Masterlist II Marvel Masterlist

“I told Steve the truth. Come home, the pack needs an explanation.”

That was Nat’s message. And though you only saw it hours after you had received it, it got you out the door as quickly as when you left the compound. At least you left with a smile on your face and confidence about your plan. Bucky didn’t expect you to be this excited about knowing that Steve now knows the truth. But before you walked out the door, you told him that this is it, kissed him passionately, and ran down the hall with a happy squeal in your voice, making the vampire laugh. 

The pack thinks you’re walking back into the compound in confidence because you’re ready to be the alpha. But that’s not the reason for your confidence. You’re walking in confidence because in your mind if Steve was upset about bonding with Bucky, he would have hunted you down by now. You know he has the capabilities to do it. 

And though you expect him to have a furious look on his face when you meet, he doesn’t. You’re not sure what the look is, but it’s not the kind you thought he would have. 

Nat stands beside him, a small smile on her face to know that you’re back home safe and sound. And now that you’re out of the packs’ ear and alone with Nat and Steve, and Sam apparently, you’re ready to start telling them the truth. 

But before you can open your mouth to start your speech you had been planning on the ride back, Steve holds up his hand to stop you. “Just...put up your hair,” he says, trying not to come off as being angry, but his rough tone shocks you a bit. 

Knowing that he wants to see the mark on your neck, you do as he says and exposes the scarred vampire bonding mark on your skin. “So, soulmates do exist,” Sam states as he walks closer. 

You look up at Steve as he takes a step closer, his eyes moving from the mark on your neck to the locket. And he still doesn’t seem to get angry by all of this. “You’re taking this extremely well,” you whisper, making his eyes shift up to meet yours and he finds that you’re slightly concerned about that fact. 

His smile, however, seems to reassure you a bit more. “I know Bucky. And even though he’s a vampire and things didn’t end well between me and him, I know he’s a good guy,” Steve mentions, reaching out to rest his hands on your shoulders. “And, I have a feeling that after everything he’s been through, he deserves someone like you.”

You smile at his words and nod your head in thanks to him before glancing down to your wrist that still has the bracelet he gave to you. Slowly unclipping it, you bite your lower lip and hand it back to him when he follows your gaze. “Thank you for understanding, Steve,” you whisper, smiling at him as he takes the bracelet and looks up at you again. 

“So, what’s your plan now, soulmate?” Nat questions, making you and Steve step away from each other. 

Looking up to Steve when he turns his head back down to you, you take in a deep breath and run your tongue over your lips. “I need to know that no matter what, you will support me and my decision,” you speak, needing reassurance that you have another werewolf pack by your side.

“Why? What are you planning?” Sam asks as he steps forward again. 

“I want to show everyone that vampires and werewolves can be in one place without biting each other’s heads off,” you sternly state and you turn to face him. Sam stares down at you, folds his arms over his chest and shifts on his feet, waiting for you to carry on. “I want everyone to know the truth about how this war started. I want to prove that our urge to kill vampires and their urge to kill us is all based on false stories and that we can live together in peace, find out what each species wants and set up treaties that actually work,” you carry on, looking between the three werewolves in the room with you. “I want each species to be treated equally.”

Sam, Nat, and Steve glance between each other as smiles grow on their faces. “And what are you going to do about those that disagree with you?” Steve questions. 

You smile back at him, a determined glint flickering through your eyes as blink makes him smile even more. “Prove them that I’m right. We won’t be working alone. Everything will be done with vampires. Every meeting will have as many vampires in the room as there are werewolves,” you explain, your words making Nat nod in agreement and think to herself that it’s a good plan. “Those that disagree, I’ll prove them wrong with Bucky at my side.”

“It’s gonna be a lot to explain to Tony when he wakes up,” Nat mentions, and your smile immediately drops. 

You should go see him. None of this would have happened, none of this ‘planning to end an age-long war’ would be happening now if he hadn’t been attacked after going for the rogue nest of vampires. You don’t know if you should be grateful about that, or saddened. Still, you should go see him. 

Steve knows the look in your eye and smiles as he places his hand on your shoulder. “I’ll take you to see him, if you want.” To that, you nod up at him and turn towards the door.

Nat smiles to herself, proud at how well you’re handling things and taking control. But, she knows that you can’t do this alone. Even though you have her support, as well and Steve’s, you’re going to need more than that.

You need your mate, now than ever before. And she’s going to make sure you get just that. 

Sitting on the bed beside Tony, you bite your lower lip as your eyes glance over the bruising on his face. You remember what it was like, having vampire venom in your system. You’re just glad that your father is stable now after having the venom sucked out of his body. But you don’t want to imagine what he could be experiencing now in this coma. What dreams he could be having.

“When you were bitten the other day, in the park. Why weren’t you affected by the venom?” Steve questions, stepping closer to you as you break your stare on Tony’s face and drop your head between your shoulders. 

That’s a question you have yet to find the answer to. 

With a sigh, you shake your head and slowly look towards him. “My best guess is that because they were newly turned vampires, they didn’t know how to inject venom into a victim,” you state and it seems like the most plausible answer. 

But Steve can see that you have another guess. “But sometimes I think that maybe being a vampire’s soulmate changed that.”

“You think you’re immune to vampire venom now?” he asks, making you shrug your shoulders and glance back down to Tony. 

“It’s not as complicated as you think,” a voice says from the door of the room, causing yours and Steve’s heads to snap to the side to see who it is. 

Steven Strange walks into the room, a comforting smile on his face to you as you stand from the bed and face him. He glances down to Tony for a moment before looking back up to you and Steve. “You were bitten by a vampire who was turned a week ago. They still have a lot to learn. You were lucky,” Strange mentions, confirming your suspensions and informing you that you’re not immune to vampire venom. Just that of your soulmate. “And it seems that your luck has carried on. That you’re now planning to end this war,” he adds, looking over to Steve to check if he supports your decision. 

You both nod after looking at each other. “It’s going to be tough. I don’t think a lot of werewolf packs or even members of our own are going to like the idea of working with vampires,” Steve mentions, folding his arms over his chest as he keeps his stare on Strange. 

“You might be wrong,” Strange says back, perking your interest and making you take a small step forward. “You werewolves believe a lot in connection like mates. It’s important, a way of life for you, right?” You and Steve nod to that. Mates have a deep connection with each other, which is why it’s rare for mates to split up. “And the vampires want this war to end as much as the next person does. They’re tired of being portrayed as the monsters and if that can end, then they’ll be on any side that will end this war. So, it’s not as complicated as you think.”

“There are some vampires that won’t side with us because we are werewolves. And what about the urge to kill that we all feel for the opposite side?” Steve questions, looking between you and Strange, seeing as how one of you seems to always have an answer. “Asking them to try and push those instincts aside isn’t going to work.” 

You know he’s right. It was stupid of you to think that you could ask that werewolves and vampires. You thought it might work and you have yet to test it out, but you do need a back-up plan if it doesn’t work. 

“You might be surprised. But, you might want to wait until Full Moon is over before putting these plans into action,” Strange suggests. 

Full Moon? So soon? You’re amazed at how quickly time seems to have gone. But you know that Strange is right. Trying to carry out these plans when nerves and emotions are riling up because every werewolf is getting ready to transform won’t be a good idea. 

It would probably be a good idea for you to spend Full Moon with your pack, now that you are the alpha, but you’re worried that your wolf won’t allow that to happen. Perhaps if Bucky can be here…

No, that’s a terrible idea. Having a vampire in a compound full of transformed werewolves would be like putting Bucky on death row. 

You’ll figure something out. You have to. 

To say that Nat is nervous about walking into a coven of vampires is an understatement. She can feel her instincts rising with each step she takes. She has no idea what she’s going to do when she comes across one vampire, or what they’ll even do. But, she’s ready. 

The doors swing open, making Nat stop in her tracks so she doesn’t give the impression that she’s here to cause any harm. And when she sees Bucky in front of the group of vampires, she breathes out a relieved sigh and wipes her sweaty palms on her pants as she fights back her instincts. 

In her mind, she keeps chanting to herself ‘Don’t attack, don’t attack, don’t attack’, but she can’t help the fact that her eyes flicker a golden color just like Bucky and his company behind him can’t help the red glow that fills their eyes and the fangs that poke out slightly from their lips. 

Bucky holds his hand up to stop the others behind him from following as he carries on to near Nat. She’s a bit relieved at that. Talking to one vampire is easier than talking to four. 

“What are you doing here?” Bucky asks when he reaches Nat. Respecting his boundaries, he keeps a good amount of distance between him and the werewolf in front of him. “Is (Y/n) okay?” he questions, thinking that’s the only reason she must be here, that something bad has happened to you and she has to break the news to him. 

Nat smiles at him and shakes her head “She’s fine. More than fine, actually. She’s determined to get this plan to end the war going,” she says with a chuckle in her voice. And Bucky laughs with her as he nods his head. Nat doesn’t feel a threat anymore, not even with the vampires behind Bucky, so her shoulders relax. She didn’t even realize she was tense. “She’s going to speak to the pack tonight. I think she needs you there with her.”

Those words make Bucky’s head snap up and his smile falls. “You think it’s a good idea for a vampire to walk into a pack of werewolves just like that? How do I know this isn’t a trap?”

“I’m doing this for (Y/n),” Nat snaps at him, making the female vampire behind him shift on her feet. Nat can see that she wants to hiss, but won’t unless her leader does. “I give you my word that you will walk out in one piece,” she mentions, pulling her eyes away from the group behind Bucky to look at him again. 

He thinks about it for a moment, glances over his shoulder to Wanda, and sighs. How can he say no to this if you need him?

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#vampire au #vampire/werewolf AU #Vampire!Bucky #Bucky Barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky imagine #bucky x y/n #james bucky barnes #bucky fanfic #bucky #bucky x reader #bucky barnes imagine #the winter soldier #the winter soldier imagines #the winter soldier x reader #in the dark

[scarletdawnxx-blog]

Nightmare Chapter 3 Continuation of Bucky Barnes x Reader

You sat crossed legged on Bucky’s bed, a pillow across your lap, which Bucky’s head laid upon.

 “Whatever you hear, don’t interrupt, don’t enter the room.” You told Steve who was standing over the two of you. 

“That doesn’t make me feel good,” Bucky grumbled. 

“It will be fine, but this will take a lot of concentration and it can’t be broken. If I pull out of his mind part way through, things could go,” You paused trying to find the right words, you could feel the nervousness in both of them. “Well not like how we would like them.” You finished. Steve nodded and left you to it, closing the door behind him. 

“Are you sure you still want to do this?” Bucky asked. You gave him a reassuring smile.

“Of course, do you still want to go through with this?” He simply nodded. 

You took a deep breath, placing your hands on either side of his head. Closing your eyes, you slipped into his mind. You instantly felt like you had just been dropped in a vast, churning sea, finding it hard to find your way up.

 Concentrating harder, you searched for those memories from so long ago, when Hydra had first taken him. You could feel him fighting you, trying to push those memories further from you. But you followed that darkness pulling you deeper. There was so much darkness, and despair. Your heart felt like it was being ripped from your chest from all the pain. Sweat started to bead on your brow as you witnessed memory after memory, dark and cold and pain in all of them. What was worse was truly seeing what Bucky had endured. The brainwashing had indeed turned his body and mind into a perfect, obedient weapon, he truly had no control and had to sit back and watch himself commit all these terrible crimes, aware of everything he was doing but powerless to stop it, screaming trying to wake himself out of it. Tears were in both your eyes and you continued in deeper until finally you found them. The trigger words rooted deep into him. You knew this part was going to be painful for both of you. The words almost taking on a life of their own and digging deeper, not wanting to be removed. You were hoping to trick them, make them think you were alike.

Bucky’s breathing had become erratic, gritting his teeth down, trying not cry out. You couldn’t take this pain away, not while you were so deep in it with him, all your focus and power being used to pull these words out by the root. You’re not sure how long you were in there, or who the screams were coming from by the end, but you had pulled everything from his mind except one. Something you weren’t quite expecting. A kill safe word, to neutralize him in case he had gotten out of hand in those early days. You almost laughed when you saw the word flash in your mind. Sputnik. Say that word and he would fall into a deep sleep, reverting him back to Bucky from the Winter Soldier. You had a decision to make, do you leave it, in case it all your work was for nothing and you needed to stop him from hurting the others. Did they know about the safe word? Did Bucky? Surely it would have been talked about if the team knew. Bucky soon started thrashing under you and the word slipped from your grasp. You soothed his mind as you made your way back out, not fading out the memories from Hydra, you had talked and the info those memories gave was too vital to remove, but you unhitched the emotions from them, took away the guilt. You could feel his own sense of calm over taking yours and something else, something you hadn’t felt when you first entered his mind. A warm glowing feeling. It had been so small it had been swallowed by everything else, but now, you could feel it wholly. It felt like someone calling you home. It was all safe and good and love, you realized. He loved someone. You didn’t pry further, he deserved some secrets. You gently removed your hand from him and wiped your tear-stained face. Bucky still lay there, having fallen into a calm sleep, his mind exhausted. You opened his bedroom door to see Steve, Natasha and Sam sitting outside. 

“How is he?” Steve asked concerned jumping up and peering over your shoulder into the room. 

“Sleeping.” You said quietly looking back at him over your shoulder. 

“Do you think it worked?” he asked as you closed the door behind you. 

“I think so, we will need to test it later, but now, let him rest. His mind will need time.” You said wrapping your arms around yourself feeling cold, deep in your bones. “How long was I in there?” 

“It’s been hours, we weren’t concerned until the screams started.” Natasha said standing up from her spot on the floor. “What happened in there?” she asked concerned.

“Let’s go down to the kitchen and talk, I could really use something to eat.” You told them jerking your head in that direction. They quietly nodded and the group of you made your way to the kitchen. Hours must have passed because as you approached the kitchen one of the many staff members was already preparing dinner. You settled yourself into a chair, Steve and Sam joining you, while Natasha busied herself making a cup of tea. The men just stared at you waiting for you to tell them what happened. 

“It was difficult, the trigger words were deep rooted and had almost taken on a life of their own, they fought me, not wanting to be removed, but I think I did it. It was painful, for both of us.” You finished rubbing your arms, trying to warm yourself. 

“How are you not exhausted?” Sam asked. “Normally you would be wiped out after using them for such an extended period of time.” 

“I mean, I am tired, but I don’t feel drained. I guess all that training is paying off.” You shrugged your shoulders. Not really having an explanation. 

“Or you are becoming more powerful than you thought you could be.” Natasha said setting a cup of hot tea in front of you. Taking it in your hands welcoming the warmth it gave you. That was a scary thought. How long before it got to be to much for you, before you may not be able to control it anymore, before someone decided to use it for their own gain. 

“I think it would be best for everyone to not let that kind of news getting out,” Steve said leaning back in his chair and crossing his arms over his chest.

 You nodded in agreement. It was your deepest fear, not that you would ever let them know that. You thought back on the paper you had read about genetic mutations, about the professor who had written the paper. Perhaps you should reach out to him. See if he had the answers, you were looking for. You looked at the people around you, they al l had explanations for their powers, Steve and Bucky with their super serum, Sam and Tony with their tech, Nat with her years of training and abuse in the red room. You were surrounded by gods and people exposed to elements that changed them, but nothing like that had ever happened to you. Just one day it fully awoke inside of you and now, your powers were taking off faster than you could really keep up with them, especially now that you were flexing that muscle more and more.

  When Bucky finally emerged hours later, he found you sitting alone, the rest of the team having left for various task around the compound. Sitting around waiting for Bucky to wake up wasn’t helping anyone. But you had drifted so far off in your own mind they had left you to it, said you had done enough. 

“Y/N” he said quietly, trying not to startle you. 

“Hey Barnes, How are you feeling?” you asked giving him a small smile. 

“You walked around my brain and I still can’t get you to call me Bucky,” he teased trying to make light of the whole situation. 

“It’s not my fault that you have a ridiculous nickname.” You retorted and he sat down next to you. “But really, how are you feeling?” you asked again placing a hand on his arm, genuine concern etched on your face. 

“I feel fine, lighter I guess, like I don’t have the weight of all those years on me.” He replied looking at your hand. You pulled it back quickly, not sure if after everything he was okay with the contact. “I’m guessing it worked then? What you did?” he asked still not really meeting your eyes, afraid of what he would see there. Disgust? Pity? Hate? Not knowing your heart ached to hold him close and not let him go. 

“I think so but there is really only one way to find out. I know the words, we need to see if they still awaken what was buried deep in you.” You stood and made your way to the window, the sky turning shades of coral and lilac from the setting sun. “Whenever you’re ready that is.” You added turning slightly back to look at him over your shoulder. He rubbed his hands over his face and sighed. 

“No time like the present right? We are this far down already, time to finish it.” Bucky replied and you turned to fully look at him. He was scared, you could feel it.

“F.R.I.D.A.Y. can you gather the team to the interrogation rooms?” You asked the A.I. not looking away from Bucky. She located each member of the team on compound grounds and you and Bucky made your way towards the rooms you had been avoiding but it would be the safest place, nothing he could really break in there. 

“So, we are really doing this?” Tony asked leaning against the far back wall of the observation room. 

“He says he wants to get it over with,” You replied to Tony, seeing Bucky sitting in the room by himself. He looked so tired, you could see the extended years on him, how old his soul felt. 

“I still say we should restrain him, you know, in case it didn’t work.” 

“Absolutely not,” You clipped at him in a harsh tone. You knew Bucky had endured all of that torture while being strapped down and you wouldn’t let that happen to him again. Tony just threw his arms up in defeat. “Besides, Steve will be in there with me, in case something goes wrong.” You looked to Steve and he nodded, you both entering the room with Bucky. 

“F.R.I.D.A.Y activate barn door protocol.” Stark Said and the facility locked down. Bucky looked to you and Steve.

“Just a precaution,” Steve said in a reassuring manner placing a hand on Bucky’s shoulder. Bucky half smiled, trying not to show his worry. “If you aren’t ready to do this we don’t have to do it right this second. No one would blame you if you weren’t ready. If you still needed time Buck.” Steve told him. It was true, the whole team knew that this would be hard for him, all expect Tony who just wanted it over with. 

“No, Y/N worked to hard to not test it.” Bucky said finally looking at you. He could see it on you too, the worry and fear. It matched his own. But you were afraid for a different reason, you were afraid you had failed him, that you put his mind through all of that for nothing, that you couldn’t save him. All he saw was fear that the Winter Soldier and all he had done was in this small room with her, with only Steve standing between her and possible death. He quickly looked away. “Let’s get this over with,” he said straightening himself and swallowing down his fear, hardening himself against the emotions rolling around inside of him.

 You wanted to say something but words had left you, what would you say to him anyways, the way he looked at you, it made your mouth go dry, gone were the feelings of friendship, the intimacy you had shared not but a few nights ago holding him tight after he had agreed to try this and it was replaced by something you couldn’t quite place. Everything he was feeling was so jumbled around. 

“Желание” you began and he stiffened. “ржавый, семнадцать,” you continued. Bucky fought against the pull of the words, still remembering every life that had been taken. “рассвет, печь, девять,” Bucky ground his teeth, gripping the arms of the chair tightly, tears breaking free from his eyes. “доброкачественный, возвращение домой, один, грузовой вагон.” You finished and stared at him for a long moment, looking for any change, but he just looked at you with relief in his eyes. Your breath caught in your throat and you thought for a moment you would burst into tears along with him.

  “Buck?” Steve asked cautiously. 

Bucky looked at his friend and smiled standing from the chair. Steve took him into a tight hug. You wanted to go to him, to look into those eyes and know that he was free of all Hydra had done to him. To celebrate this moment with him. Instead, you quietly walked from the room, the rest of the team greeting you with praise but it all felt hollow somehow. But you smiled at them and made your excuses, the team joining Steve and Bucky. You walked quietly through the compound, the barn door protocol being lifted as you went, making your way to the large glass front of the building. Outside you could see Bruce talking with a red head you didn’t recognize, they both looked at you as you stepped into the cooling night air. Just then an elderly man in a wheel chair came into view.

  “Hello, Y/N, I’m Professor Charles Xavier,” he said in a British accent, this was the man who wrote the research you had been reading. “I think we need to have a talk.”  

#Bucky Barnes #bucky imagine #bucky x reader #bucky x female reader #bucky barnes x y/n #marvel #marvel fanfiction #xmen #reader insert #Steve Rogers #tony stark #The Avengers #natsha romanoff #sam wilson #falcon and the winter soldier

[lokis-army-77]

If You Please

Chapter Fourteen

Bucky Barnes x Reader

Word Count: 4440

This is technically a reader insert but without the (y/n) and all that. She also has no name mentioned so feel free to imagine as you please.

Follow the reader through the events of the Captain America movies and experience her love for Bucky Barnes.

Warnings: canon typical violence

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Masterlist

We escaped quickly and descended down into the dark, damp sewer system of D.C. until we came to a steel ladder directly in the middle of our path several minutes later. Maria climbed up first, to make sure the coast was clear then she signaled for us to follow. There was an SUV waiting for us a few paces away from where we had emerged. I slowly trailed behind the others and into one of the back seats. The drive to the base, which seemed to be a rundown dam in the middle of the woods, took us almost half an hour.

After getting out the van we rushed in through a singular gated door at the base of the dam. Nat was still losing blood but the first aid kit in the van helped slow it down. As we walked down the dimly lit hall I spotted a man running towards us.

“GSW,” Maria shouted out to the man. “She’s lost almost a pint of blood.”

“Let me take her,” the man shouted back, still jogging to us.

“She’ll want to see him first,” she said before we reached a set of double doors and hurried through them. Maria led us down a long corridor which opened up to a large room with a section closed off with plastic strip curtains. She reached out and pulled part of the curtain back to let us see inside. There lying down in a hospital bed was Nick Fury, who was supposed to be dead.

“Well, it’s about damn time.” Fury stated in a sarcastic tone. I looked to Steve, Who was holding Nat up, and gave him a quizzical look, which he returned with his own shake of the head.

After the initial shock of seeing Fury alive, Nat was sat down by the doctor who was trying to stop her arm from bleeding. In the meanwhile, Fury was explaining to the group how he was able to fake his death and why he was hunkering out in a dam. This plan also helped him to know which people he could have some trust in, seeing as how SHIELD was now compromised and there was no telling how far the clutches of HYDRA had gotten. Now that people thought he was dead, it would come as a surprise when he inevitably resurfaced.

When Nat’s stitches were done we headed to a table on the other side of the room which had several files and computers scattered about. I took a seat on the far end and put my head in my hands. I could feel a massive headache coming on, which was uncommon for me since I took the serum. It felt like white-hot knives were digging through the back of my skull and into the spot right between my eyes. It was so bad that I completely missed the whole conversation the group was having. I eventually laid my head down in my crossed arms to try and combat it, but the pain never subsided.

A hand came down on my shoulder, startling me out of my painful daze, it was Steve. I saw his mouth move but couldn’t hear anything but the loud ringing in my ears. I just looked at him confused. He tried saying something again but I still couldn't hear him.

“Stevie, I can’t hear anything over this loud ringing in my ears,” I whispered, I knew if I talked loudly the vibrations of my voice would hurt. He gave me a nod and held up his finger, telling me to wait as he walked away. The doctor from before came back with him and sat in front of me. The doctor motioned his hand like it was talking and I knew he wanted me to tell him what was going on, so I did. When I was done, he took a small flashlight out from his pocket and shined it in my eyes. He turned to Steve and said something then turned to me and grabbed hold of my hand.

Both the doctor and Steve led me to a second hospital bed, which was a couple feet away from where Fury had been and made me lay down. As I got situated under the covers, Steve tapped my hand a few times to get my attention and when he got it, he started to tap again. Morse code, he had made me learn it as kids, that way mom could never hear our secret conversations, it even came in handy when I joined the SSR. I watched closely as he tapped out a series of long and short patterns. He was telling me the doctor was going to give me something to help me sleep and that I would be okay. I nodded and tapped back a thank you before the Doctor came back and inserted a syringe into my arm, seconds later I could feel myself drifting away.

I woke up hours later without the searing pain of a headache and my hearing fully intact. I flipped the covers away from myself and turned to let my legs drape off the side of the bed. I hulled myself onto my feet and began to make my way to the table the group was setting at yesterday. Sam was there drinking coffee and talking to Nat, and from what I could tell, it must have been early morning.

“Good morning sleepy head.” Sam sang out. I gave him a small smile as I took the seat to his right, across from Nat. “How ya feeling?”

“Eh. I’m not in physical pain anymore if that’s what you’re asking.” I looked down at my hands and eyed the ring I had been wearing since a few days ago. It glimmered in the light as I took it off and placed it on the table. I then took my locket necklace off and slipped the ring onto the chain. I was lucky I hadn't lost it yesterday, but I wasn’t thinking I would be going into a fight. Now that I knew more fighting was to come, it would be safer around my neck.

“Is that your engagement ring?” Sam asked quietly.

“Yeah. It was Bucky’s mother, Winnifred. He originally proposed with this locket, but a few months later, after talking to her and begging her to keep it a secret from Steve, she finally gave it to him.” I smiled at the memory.

“Wait, I thought Steve knew.”

“He does now. I kind of blurted it out when he tried to stop me from going with him to rescue the 107th from the HYDRA base in 1943, but we got engaged in ‘41.” I took a long pause before talking again. “You know it feels like just yesterday when I lost him, like the pain from him being gone still hurts, but I’ve learned to cope with it over the past two years. Now I have to find out that he is alive, but not himself because he's being used as a mercenary by HYDRA. He looked at me after you knocked him down and that look broke my heart. It wasn’t the look of a man wanting to kill, it was of someone who was scared, someone who had no clue what was going on. He’s still in there, I know he is and I’m going to be the one to bring him back.” I jammed a finger down on the table to make my point.

“Are you sure he’s really still in there? He’s been in and out of cryo hundreds of times throughout the last 70 years, no to mention, he’s probably endured countless hours of brain wiping and torture from HYDRA.” Nat said in a concerned but doubtful tone.

“I didn’t lose hope when he might have been dead in the forties, I won't lose hope in him now. I’ll find a way to bring him back to me.” That was when Steve came through the double doors and into the room wearing his old suit. “Steve, where in the world did you get that?”

“I borrowed it from the Smithsonian. Here, I found your office. Thought you might want it.” He tossed a bag at me and I caught it, slowly opening it to reveal my old suit. “I still have no clue why you keep it in there and not on display with everything else.”

“Thanks, that was very thoughtful of you.”

“Don’t be sarcastic. You’re gonna want it when we go to take out the helicarriers.” He looked at me then to the other two, “Come on suit up, we don't have much time before they launch,” he looked back at me, “I’ll fill you in on the plan after you get dressed. Oh and Maria has your staff, and new guns for you.”

It was almost noon now and Steve, Sam, Maria, and I were quickly ascending the back stairs of the SHIELD base. We made it to the thirty-second floor in no time, only for the door to be locked. We all held our guns up to the door as Maria sent out some radio interference so one of the people in the room would come to check on the dish that was outside. When the door opened the man was surprised and instantly let us through

Steve came to a stop at the PA system and turned it on. “Attention all SHIELD agents, this is Steve Rogers. You've heard a lot about me over the last few days. Some of you were even ordered to hunt me down. But I think it's time, to tell the truth. SHIELD is not what we thought it was. It's been taken over by HYDRA. Alexander Pierce is their leader. The STRIKE and Insight crew are HYDRA as well. I don't know how many more, but I know they're in the building. They could be standing right next to you. They almost have what they want. Absolute control. They shot Nick Fury. And it won't end there. If you launch those helicarriers today, HYDRA will be able to kill anyone that stands in their way. Unless we stop them. I know I'm asking a lot. But the price of freedom is high. It always has been. And it's a price I'm willing to pay. And if I'm the only one, then so be it. But I'm willing to bet I'm not.”

“Always been one for speech haven't you Stevie?” I joked.

“Shut up kid, let's get going.” he shook his head, bemused.

“He totally came up with that on the spot didn’t he?” Sam asked.

“Definitely,” I replied.

We left Maria in the PA room where she would be able to monitor the status of the helicarriers as we tried to take them offline. Making our way down to the docking bay I looked out one of the windows next to where we were running.

“Steve, we need to hurry, the bay doors are opening,” I called out.

“Only a few more floors, we can make it.” After he said that, we started running faster, almost leaving Sam behind.

Finally, we pushed through one of the lower roof doors. I started to sprint toward the edge and before I jumped off, Sam grabbed my outstretched arm and started to fly. He maneuvered us to the far-right helicarrier and then let go of me. I plummeted to the deck and as I made contact with the ground I immediately threw myself into a tumble so I didn’t get hurt. As I sprang to my feet I was met with an onslaught of bullets. Ducking to dodge them I ran off to the side where a stack of crates was lying. I fished one of the guns from the hustler and cocked a bullet into the chamber. Taking a deep breath I stepped out from my cover and shot back at the men.

Two of the seven went down as a bullet went through each of their chests. I went to shoot again but a hand came out from behind me and yanked my right arm down. They tightly brought my arm to my back and grabbed my gun with the other hand. With my free left arm, I swung it back and clipped the person in the chin hard with my elbow. The grip they had on my right arm fell away as they fell to the ground. I turned around and quickly grabbed my gun from his hand and resumed shooting at the others.

I reached to the back of my holster where I had clipped two grenades before we had left the hideout. Pulling the pin and letting go of the trigger, I threw it at the men, who were immediately taken out with the blast.

“Hey kid you good?” I heard Steve's voice come through the comlink.

“Good as I can be. The deck is all clear, where are you?”

“Sam and I are inbound.” as he said that Sam shot up from below the carrier with Steve holding onto his hands. They landed a few feet in front of me and I jogged to catch up to them. “Wow, you took them all out really fast.”

I just smiled and held up the second grenade, “Work smarter not harder. Come on let's hurry up, the fact there weren't that many people on here is making me suspicious.” As soon as I said that we walked past one of the crates and Steve was pushed over the edge of the carrier by Bucky. “Steve!” Sam and I yelled simultaneously.

Sam jumped into action, trying to take off to save Steve from falling to his death, but Bucky grabbed one of the wings of his suit and flung him back. “Go put the chip in, I'll take care of this.” He yelled out to me.

I turned and sprinted to one of the doors that led into the carrier and I was met with two corridors. After looking down at each of them I decided on taking the right one. Reaching the end I heard a soft noise around the corner, I peaked around slowly and saw a man carrying an assault rifle. He was close enough for me to run up on him without him being able to get a good shot in with a gun. So that’s what I did. I ran at an angle from the corner and used my left leg to push myself off the ground and then my right to push off the wall and kick the man directly in the side of the head. He fell to the ground, completely unconscious. Not turning back I continued down the hall until I came to the stairs that would take me down to the systems room.

“Are you both okay?” Sam cut through on the coms.

“Yeah, I'm still on the helicarrier.” came Steve.

“Me too, I’m almost in the systems room. Where are you?”

“I'm grounded, the wings are busted.”

I exited the staircase and walked to the middle of the systems room. The opening to the targeting system was on the other side of the large cylindrical computer that took up the whole center of the room. I made my way around but stopped short when I saw him standing there, glaring.

“Bucky,” I held my hands up and took my finger off the trigger of my gun to show him I wasn’t going to do anything. “Bucky, I know you’re in there somewhere.” He just kept staring blankly. “I don’t want to hurt you, but I will in order to get this chip where it needs to be.” I took a slow step in his direction, but in an instant, he pulled his gun and shot mine out of my hand, and started to stalk towards me. I reached over my shoulders to grab the two separated staff pieces from their holsters as I moved backward. Bucky stopped walking and just started some more before he came at me full force. I quickly stepped up onto the railing and did a flip over him, landing behind him. Before he turned around I slipped the piece of the staff in my right hand around his neck and latched on with my left, forcing him to stumble back. This didn’t hold him long because he grabbed the bar and forcefully twisted it over his head, thus breaking my grip. I stumbled a few feet ahead, almost barely missing the punch that he threw. That was when I noticed Steve had made it into the room.

“Steve, a little help here would be great,” I said as I started to run back to Bucky who had turned around to face Steve. I jumped up doing a backflip kick, using Bucky’s back as a kicking-off point and landed back on my feet as Bucky slammed into the railing. Hoping he would stay preoccupied with Steve, I hurriedly ran to the system console and opened the chip holder. I took out one of the chips and placed it off to the side before reaching into my pocket for the new chip. I had almost put it in the open slot before I was knocked off my feet and the chip flew from my hand and over the banister. I turned over off of my stomach just in time to see Steve and Bucky also fall over the banister. I scrambled to the edge to see what was going on as I called out, “Steve the chip fell over.”

“I got it, stay there.” He yelled back before Bucky sent him flying. I watched as he grabbed the chip but it was dropped further down as Bucky came at Steve again. I took my second gun out and started to shoot near Bucky’s legs, in order to try and veer him off course without hurting him. Steve reached the glass bottom of the room and started sprinting to the chip which was nestled in between the glass and a metal beam. I stopped shooting as it became harder to get a clear target without also shooting Steve.

They were fighting now, hand to hand, Bucky had knocked Steve’s shield away and he pulled his knife out in the process. He stabbed Steve in the shoulder, when he fell to the ground Bucky dove for the chip. Steve wasn't far behind him, He latched onto Bucky, choking him then throwing him to the ground.

“Steve, don't hurt him,” I cried out as I watched them struggle on the ground, my hands went straight to my mouth as I heard the loud sound of bone breaking and Bucky’s scream right after. He tried rolling over but that gave Steve an opening to put him in a chokehold. “Steve stop, that's enough, you’re hurting him,” I yelled out in despair as I watched bucky struggle to stay conscious, I couldn't watch it anymore, I turned away. Seconds later Steve yelled my name. I hesitantly looked back over the railing, Bucky was lying unconscious and Steve was jumping up onto the landing under me.

“Here”, he tossed the chip up to me and I caught it. Suddenly a gunshot rang out and I looked to where Bucky was once laying, he was standing now, gun raised.

“Thirty seconds” Maria’s voice came over the com.

“I've got it,” I spoke back, making my way to the control board.

Another shot rang out, this time I heard the impact right behind me before a pain erupted on my side. I turned to see Steve laid out on the ground clutching his stomach, the bullet must have gone straight through him to me.

“Guys, they're going online right now, hurry!” Maria almost yelled into the com. I turned back around, holding my side and took the last few steps up to the console, and securely placed the chip in the open space.

“Charlie lock,” I huffed out, confirming to Maria that I had successfully put the chip in, as I slid to my knees.

“Okay, both of you get out of there.”

“No fire now,” Steve yelled.

“But Steve,” Maria said almost reluctantly.

“Just do it,” he yelled again.

The helicarrier jerked seconds later after being hit with the rockets. I slammed into the railing and was flung over, landing ungracefully in a heap on the glass floor. I could hear shouts of pain echoing, looking around I spotted Bucky stuck under a massive metal beam. Steve apparently had to because he was climbing down to him. He got to him quickly and started to lift the heavy thing off of him. Bucky wiggled out from under the beam and knelt there for a second before Steve said something to him that I couldn't hear, he reared back and swung a punch at him after that. I stood to my feet and slowly made my way to them, stopping multiple times to steady myself as the carrier trembled violently. I reached them just as a large metal cylinder fell into the glass floor, making it give way. I fell through the broken glass and into the cold water of the Potomac River.

I swam weakly to the surface. Once my head came out of the water I took a deep breath in and made my way to the rocky shore, careful to not be hit by any debris. The shore was farther away than I had anticipated and I was almost completely out of breath as I crawled my way out of the water. Laying on my back I looked and the smoke filled the sky.

‘So much for laying low,' I thought to myself. I was broken from my thoughts as a few yards down the shoreline Bucky came out of the water dragging Steve with him. He looked back at me as he dropped Steve to the ground but then turned to walk away. I got up quickly and ran to Steve, making sure he was okay. I took out the tracker Maria had given each of us in case anything happened and set it off. They would come find him now, I gave him a short kiss on the forehead. “Goodbye Stevie, I'll see you again some time,” I whispered to him before taking off my tracker and throwing it into the water.

I started walking in the direction Bucky had gone, He couldn't have gotten far with that broken arm and I was right. I found him slowly making his way through the woods. I stayed away from him, but he never left my sight. I knew he realized I had followed him when he tried to slip away behind a group of dense trees but was unsuccessful. He tried this a few more times before giving up and acknowledging that I wasn’t going anywhere. Finally, we broke out into part of the city, but we kept a low profile, or as low of one as two people in fighting suits and a man with a metal arm could. I kept inching closer to him as we walked and twenty minutes in I was almost next to him.

“Quit following me” He let out gruffly without looking back at me.

“No,” I argued.

“Quit following me, now,” He said a little more agitatedly.

“No, I won’t. I’m not leaving you alone and hurting Bucky. I love you, I can't leave you again.” That made him stop in his tracks and eye me down.

“Don’t know who you are.” his voice sounded uncertain.

“Yes, you do.”

“No, I don’t.

“I have proof that you do.” I yanked the necklace with the ring and locket over my head and marched to him, holding it out. He took it hesitantly and looked at the ring first then opening the locket he just stared at the picture of the both of us together. I saw something flicker in his eyes before he gave the necklace back, it almost looked like he remembered something. He started back walking but didn’t say a word when I kept following, just let out a long huff.

It took us an hour to reach Ronald Reagan Airport, and I finally understood what his plan was. “So your plan is to hijack a plane?”

“You aren’t coming.”

“I don’t know why you want to argue with me, I’m coming with you.” He gave me another glare after that.

We were walking through the small wooded area across the road from the runway when suddenly Bucky stopped. There was a small metal sign secured to one of the trees to the right, in big bold letters it said ‘NO TRESPASSING’. Bucky pulled on it and it opened like a small door into the tree where a keypad was nestled. He typed in a series of numbers and a few seconds later the ground started to move several right next to us. I jerked my head in the direction of the commotion only to see the ground opening up to a narrow staircase that descended into the earth. Bucky then closed the sign and started down the stairs, I followed suit.

It became darker the further we descended, the sounds of cars faded into the steady dripping of water. By this time I was thinking to myself that we weren't hijacking a plane, but I was proved wrong as the stairs leveled out to flat ground and Bucky turned the hanger lights on. There in the middle of the room was a black jet with a red HYDRA symbol on its side.

Looking around the room there were papers strewn about, dust even covered some of the desks along the walls. The place looked like it hadn't been used in years. To my left, I spotted Bucky grabbing all sorts of weapons from a rack on the wall and shoving them in a tattered duffel bag before zipping it up and heading to the jet. I trailed behind him.

He raised his hand up and pressed on part of the back flap to the jet, a small handle shot out and he pulled on it, which opened the back hatch of the jet. When it settled on the ground Bucky and I climbed up the ramp and into the cabin. Bucky tossed the duffel bag onto one of the benches and headed for the cockpit. He hit several buttons and switches before sitting down in the pilot's seat.

“Where are we going?” I asked softly as I sat myself down in the copilot’s seat.

“Romania.”

Tag List: @ginger-swag-rapunzel @underc0vercryptid-reads @geek-and-proud @intothesoul @leyannrae @starkleila @andy-is-gay

#james buchanan barnes #bucky x y/n #bucky barnes #bucky x reader #bucky x female reader #bucky fic #bucky fanfic #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x rogers!reader #winter solider x reader #marvel fic #marvel fanfiction

[youwerenevermeanttofeelalone]

Within Arms of Heaven | Damian Wayne

✦ pairing — older!Damian Wayne x Plus Size Reader, past!Bucky Barnes x Plus Size Reader

✦ word count — 13.1k

✦ summary — you find out secret relationships are not always a good idea the hard way, but it doesn’t matter in the end.

✦ warnings — nsfw, angst, reader is Tony Stark’s niece, mentions/depictions of cheating, a brief relationship with an age gap, hypersexuality, smut, unprotected sex (please don’t do this), oral sex (both receiving), vaginal sex, there’s a scene that could be triggering in terms of sexual assault but sexual assault is not depicted in the story, fluff

✦ a/n — I hope this isn’t too long, lmao. Let me know what you think!

❖︎・・・・・❖︎・・・・・❖︎・・・・・❖︎

Childishly, you did your best to adopt a comfortable position and faked being asleep the moment you heard the front door open. If you tried hard enough, he might’ve felt pity and cuddle you for once.

The mattress dipped. You waited as your ears picked the shuffling of fabric and sheets.

“I know you’re awake,” Bucky whispered in your ear, pulling you against him as his hard-on rubbed against your ass.

Letting out the smallest strangled sound you were capable of, you turned around. He immediately kissed you, rolling you over so he’d be on top.

You stretched your arm in order to turn the lamp on, but Bucky stopped you, pinning your wrists over your head with one hand as he kissed down your neck. You opened your legs, waiting for him to get comfortable between them.

Bucky pulled your panties to the side, making you hiss as the cold air hit your pussy. He pulled his cock out and entered you in a swift motion, grunting lowly.

You moaned louder than you had intended. Bucky clamped his free hand over your mouth, tightening his grip around your wrists with his metal hand to leverage himself as he pounded into you.

“Will you be here when I wake up?” You asked as you caught your breath.

Bucky sighed, “You know I can’t.”

Humming, you nuzzled against his chest. With his arm around you and heartbeat under your ear, you fell asleep only to wake up to a cold bed.

You didn’t mind rough sex, but hiding the bruises was getting harder and harder. This time Bucky had gone a little too far, wearing makeup on your wrists would seem excessive to anyone.

To make matters worse, when you thought you would have time alone with him he decided to be late again after having promised he would be there at 8.

There was nothing you could do to keep him from being late or from canceling plans, he didn’t want to tell people you were dating and you respected that. He wasn’t ready, he didn’t want to be seen as a creep — you understood, you always would understand.

His lateness turned into absence.

Your intentions had been to say goodbye properly before he embarked on the mission he would be part of with Sam and Sharon. Oh, well, you would have to make do with wishing him good luck in the morning.

Watching the team leave for missions was ingrained in your weekly routine. There was always something to take care of, somewhere where at least a couple of Avengers were needed.

It was especially common for Bucky to be part of those missions. He always had the energy and the drive to do it, you imagined he wanted to prove to the world — and perhaps to himself— that he deserved his title as an avenger.

His goodbyes were always cold. They had to be, you knew, it was for the best. But you had to wonder if he had ever to stopped to think for a second that one day a cold goodbye could be the last thing he said to you.

You missed him. Sleeping without him wasn’t the same, waking up in a hurry to not be caught with him when you had visitors was a fundamental part of your mornings.

His blue eyes would often ground you, making you feel like you were finally finding the normality your life had lacked years ago. You missed their comfort, how shiny they turned when he spoke about his sister.

But you would see him soon. Tony had told you that the mission was going smoothly according to Sam. He would surely be back for your birthday next month.

Bucky promised you would come clean to your friends and family after the party when the pressure was off Tony’s shoulders.

The preparations for the celebration kept you busy enough, Tony wanted to go above and beyond due to it being the first time you would celebrate your birthday as a legitimate Stark.

Tony had found out you were his niece after everything went down in Siberia. He contacted your mom, his half-sister when he was ready to confront the fact that his father had been worse than he anticipated. They bonded rather quickly, and you had so many things in common with him that he got attached from the day he met you.

He offered to pay your college tuition immediately, but you made an arrangement with him that you would work for him. Tony clarified that you would work with him and not for him, it was an important distinction.

Pepper had been surprised when she got back to run Stark Enterprises and you were there, but she too took a liking to you.

One evening, Bruce and you were the last to leave the lab, everyone else was already in the dining room. Dinner time would arrive soon, and you knew better than to leave Tony waiting.

The chatter was chirpy, they were happier than you had ever seen them.

“What are we so happy for?” You asked, taking your seat around the table.

“Bucky and Sharon finally made their relationship public,” Natasha explained.

Relationship? Public? Sharon? What were they talking about?

Peter showed you a photo on his tablet. There Bucky and Sharon were, happily touching each other as they enjoyed a sunny day at the beach.

Peter swiped his finger against the screen, now showing you a photo of Bucky clearly checking Sharon —his girlfriend— out.

Another swipe and now the photo showed Sharon, —Bucky’s gorgeous girlfriend— kissing him.

So he could go public with Steve’s ex-girlfriend but not with you?

Peter craned his neck to look at you. His puppy eyes appeared in your field of vision, blocking the photograph, as he asked, “Are you okay?”

You immediately nodded, clearing your throat in hopes that the lump forming wouldn’t be audible. “Yeah, sorry. My eyes are tired.”

“See, Tony?” Bruce chastised your uncle, “she needs a few more hours of sleep.”

You changed the subject, “So Sharon and Bucky have been dating for a while?”

Natasha stared solely at you. “You didn’t know?”

“I’m not close to any of them,” you excused your reaction. “They are always busy.”

And now it made sense as to why.

“It’s nice to see Bucky happy,” Peter commented earnestly.

You hummed, lifting your glass to take a sip of water.

Every time Bucky had complained because you were close to someone else was now infuriating. He had accused you of cheating on him with Peter just because you had fallen asleep watching a movie with him, then a week later he had bluntly asked if you would rather fuck Sam after you helped him to fix his wings.

Turns out he had been projecting the whole time.

You were less than excited about your birthday now. Wishing he wouldn’t come back in time for the celebration, you busied yourself with work like your mom did when your dad left.

He didn’t deserve your tears, nor your time really. You felt stupid for believing he worried about his career or what people would think of you for dating someone older. His excuse of wanting you to find a balance between working at the company and personally with Tony hurt the most, you had found how much he cared comforting.

The worst part was not being able to show how you were feeling. It was extremely hard around such smart and cunning people. Pepper was the one who asked first, and you could tell she had talked about it with Nat due to how quickly the redhead took interest in the conversation.

“I’m kinda overwhelmed,” you admitted.

Nat threw an arm around you and pulled you closer to her. “Birthdays, huh?”

“Yeah,” you sighed, relieved unbeknownst to them.

Sam was back already, he said he wouldn’t skip your birthday for anything in the world. You appreciated it, yet you felt a pang in your chest when he said they would’ve taken you to the mission if he had known it would be so short.

You had never gone to the beach, you didn’t feel comfortable with the idea of people seeing you in a swimsuit as a teen; and now it couldn’t be that different, much less if it was next to Sharon.

Sam told you once that you would love it as much as he did. You believed him, you just weren’t ready.

Your heart wouldn’t have taken seeing Bucky with Sharon. Although you wondered what would have his explanation been.

The idea of seeing them together on a daily basis was heart-wrenching. You loved your job, your uncle, your friends, too much to simply quit — at least you wouldn’t have to watch them leave each other’s room every morning.

You didn’t know how to feel when Sharon and Bucky arrived. Hand in hand, sporting a nice tan and beaming smiles.

Sharon let Bucky’s hand go in order to approach you. She gave you a warm hug, telling you she had a surprise for you.

“For me?” you hoped you hadn’t sounded bitter.

It seemed like you hadn’t because she grabbed your hand, pulling you toward the couch as she hurried to open her luggage. “I had to buy a bikini at the beach because I didn’t know Bucky would surprise me with a trip there,” she told you, happily.

She sounded so enamored, as though she had always dreamt of having someone like Bucky beside her. You wished he wouldn’t fail her like he had failed you.

“And the store had plus-size items! I bought you the ones I thought you would like.”

You blinked rapidly, trying to hide your shock. “Oh, Sharon, you shouldn’t have...”

“Nonsense, I should have. You will look gorgeous in them.”

Your eyes crossed Bucky’s for a fleeting second. He quickly focused his eyes on the carpet under his feet and your own went back to Sharon who was handing you the swimsuits she bought for you.

“Why don’t you try them on? We might finally convince Tony of giving us a long vacation if you like them.”

Everyone laughed at Natasha’s suggestion, everyone but Bucky and you.

Reluctantly, you accepted. Maybe it would help you get a confidence boost... you definitely needed one. And a hug. God, a big hug.

You had never visited Sharon’s room. The two of you weren’t close, your schedules didn’t align and when they did it was for important events.

She hadn’t visited your apartment either. When Tony asked if you would rather live at The Compound or on your own, you had been tempted to choose The Compound but ultimately decided that you would never be able to unwind in such a busy place.

Peter had been apart from Bucky the person who had spent more time at your place. Spending time with Peter was nice, he was the first avenger you met after Tony and like the younger brother you had always wanted to have. You enjoyed hearing his secrets and silly jokes, giving him advice... Bucky always left you wishing you could at least tell Peter about your relationship.

Sharon motioned for Natasha, Carol, and you to get comfortable in her bedroom.

As you were guided toward the bathroom, to try the first swimsuit on, you saw them sit on the bed where Bucky and Sharon had probably slept on together thousands of times.

Sharon looked proud of her choices every time you came out of the bathroom to show them. Her expression made you feel worse — it would have been easier to hate her if she wasn’t so nice, such a good agent, such a supportive woman.

She couldn’t have possibly known Bucky had been playing with you and now your anger mingled with guilt. Had he cheated on you with her or on her with you?

It didn’t matter; you felt awful.

❖︎・・・・・❖︎・・・・・❖︎・・・・・❖︎

You were finishing typing a report for Tony when Peter leaned onto your desk. You hummed, motioning for him to speak.

“Can Ned hang with us this weekend?” Peter asked, tapping his fingers against the edge of the table, “he’s upset because Betty will be out of town.”

One weekend each month, Peter and you would have a movie marathon. Sometimes Tony joined if he wasn’t busy, but it was usually only the two of you with a few visits from Pepper or May here and there, it depended on where the marathon was taking place.

Admittedly, you weren’t in the mood for spending time with anyone, but being alone didn’t sound like something you would be able to put up with. So you told Peter that it was fine, because it was; Ned was nice, he was a far better company than your tears.

Happy drove you to May and Peter’s apartment. They would go out on a date, or so you assumed by how long had it taken Happy to get changed. Your assumptions were confirmed when a blushing May opened the door.

“Ned and Peter are in Pete’s room,” she let you know as she parted from you after kissing your cheek.

Placing the snacks you had brought onto Peter’s desk, you greeted both him and Ned with a wave.

You made yourself comfortable between them. Peter’s bed was too small for the three of you so they had arranged something that resembled a pillow fort.

Focusing on the film became a task after the first ten minutes. You had to wonder why Bucky had never tried to treat you as a friend in front of everyone, why could Ned rest his head on your shoulder platonically but not him? What was wrong with affection towards you?

“Okay,” Ned sighed, pausing the film. “What’s going on with you, (N/N)?”

You almost smiled at the nickname. Should you tell them? They wouldn’t laugh, you had never met sweeter guys than them; maybe Thor, but Thor wasn’t even human.

“I had a bad experience with a guy and I’m a little upset,” you confessed. It was fine, you hadn’t said who — you wouldn’t say who.

“Define bad experience.”

“He cheated on me kind of bad.”

“You should make Peter kick his ass.”

You chuckled sadly, “It’s not worth it.”

“Who was it?”

“Oh, you don’t know him, Pete.”

Peter made you rest your head on his lap, rubbing your back in the same manner he had seen Tony do it when you were upset. Comforting people didn’t come with his spider-sense and abilities, sadly.

“We’ll find you a hot nice guy,” Ned promised. After a pause, he added, “Or a girl? Do you have a preference?”

“I don’t want to date anyone ever again.”

“Now you’re just saying things,” Peter observed. He knew how easily you grew infatuated with people, like that guy at Costco or the one at Stark Expo... He was still in the process of forgiving you for saying Brad Davis was handsome, for fuck’s sake!

“Men are disgusting. No offense.”

“None taken,” both Peter and Ned assured.

“They lie and say they want to protect you, they say they’re not ready to take things seriously in case something bad happens,” you started venting, angry at yourself for not seeing how stupid it sounded. “God, I was so stupid,” you sobbed.

Sharing a look with Ned, Peter told you, “Now I’m definitely kicking someone’s ass.”

Peter soon found out who had broken your heart. He hadn’t needed you to tell him, Bucky gave himself away by squirming every time you entered a room and this once hadn’t been the exception.

Bucky caught Peter staring, but he didn’t think much of it. The kid was curious, he liked that about him.

As you entered the lab, you paused when you saw Tony was fixing Bucky’s arm. You were about to start small talk with Peter when your uncle asked, “Can you attend a meeting at Wayne Enterprises this Tuesday?”

You avoided looking at Bucky as you acknowledged Tony. “It sounds like a bad idea, uncle.”

Tony chuckled. You only called him uncle when you wanted to convince him of something. “Look, I’ll be busy with Thunderbolt, and Pep has that trip to Germany...”

“I’m not a good businessperson.”

“They’re not interested in the business part, they want details of the project. Only Pepper could do a better job than you at that.”

It was a high compliment. However, you were doubtful — you weren’t as good with words as Tony and Pepper were, and from what you knew about The Waynes, they were pretty stuck up.

“It’s just more rich people but in Gotham,” Tony assured. “You dealt with Hammer really well last time. And Happy will go with you.”

What Tony failed to mention about the way you dealt with Hammer was that he had never wanted to have a deal with him in the first place.

You gave in still. “Which project are we presenting?”

Smiling widely, Tony instructed F.R.I.D.A.Y to send a copy of the details to your Starkpad.

You curled up in the couch while reading the files, remembering bits and pieces of the observations you had made yourself. Part of your notes was still there, thankfully transcribed and not in your hurried handwriting.

Someone cleared their throat behind you. “Can we, uh, talk?”

You shook your head, not even bothering to take your eyes off the document you were reading.

“It’ll be quick.”

“I am busy, James,” you said dismissively.

He hated being called James, he had told you a few times that it reminded him of a person he couldn’t be anymore. Well, you hated having been kept as a secret only to eventually get cheated on — he couldn’t be just Bucky to you anymore.

You had no interest in excuses, you needed to move on. You would move on, you always had and he wasn’t the most important person in your life to break your heart either way.

If you could take your father’s abandonment, you could take being cheated on by a man who didn’t know what he wanted. Or so you hoped.

Pepper greeted him, then you. Observing what you were reading, she let out a small laugh. “Good luck if you have to deal with Damian Wayne.”

At that, you lifted your head. “Why?”

“Don’t scare her, honey,” Tony warned playfully, patting Bucky’s back as he passed him.

Your question remained unanswered.

The waiting room was comfortable, you would give them that. Pepper had been right, you needed luck in order to deal with Damian Wayne. Regretting having said yes to Tony, you looked at Happy and gave him your best puppy eyes in attempts to convince him to finally call Tony.

Happy had refused to let you back off from the meeting. He didn’t understand how badly you had fucked up in there, your stuttering had been embarrassing and that wasn’t even the worst part of it.

Stupidly, you hadn’t expected him to be that handsome. You couldn’t stop staring and ended up making a fool of yourself by making him repeat his questions.

You could see him now through the glass wall of the meeting room, losing time by randomly selecting pages from the spiral-bound project he said he needed to inspect before giving you an answer.

To your luck, Damian caught you staring. Turning to your side to look at Happy, you found a teasing expression on the bodyguard’s face.

“I can take it from here if you want.”

Damian could hear the teasing in Tim’s voice. “Don’t make me punch you.” He didn’t take his eyes off the wall, you were talking, but the angle didn’t allow him to read your lips.

But when had Damian’s scare tactics stopped Tim? “You could just—“

“Don’t,” the interrupting warning came in a loud sneer. Damian lifted a finger so Tim wouldn’t say a damn thing.

Again, his brother ignored him. “Okay, I’ll ask her.”

Damian jumped off his seat, stopping the lankier man from crossing the room. “Don’t you dare, Drake.”

Tim rested both hands on Damian’s shoulders. “Read that thing, give the answer, then ask.” Seeing his younger brother’s expression, Tim added, “She’ll say yes.”

Watching his brother leave, Damian let out a huff. Your explanation had been enough for him to make a decision, and truly, from what he had read in passing, you had a way of making it sound less dull than it was.

Not that the project was dull in the slightest, but he didn’t have time to read every detail.

Damian gripped the document in his hand as he left the meeting room, approaching you personally. You stood up, looking up as he towered over you.

“Follow me, please.”

Nodding, not trusting your voice as the silkiness in which he uttered the word please resonated in your head, you followed him down the hallway.

He opened the door to his office for you. As you stepped in, you observed how normal the office was — it wasn’t bland like one would assume from someone who wears a black tie to work.

“I was wondering,” he started speaking, silky voice now more confident, “if you could stay in town for a couple of days.”

You stuttered, “I— I don’t think so.” You gained confidence when his blinking got quicker. “It would be pointless if you’re not interested in the project. I’m a busy person.”

Where did that lie come from? You spent your entire days between an office and a laboratory while your nights were full of complaining to yourself over someone you weren’t sure you could call an ex.

His brow twitched yet he stopped himself from frowning. “I am interested.”

“In that case, I could call my uncle and ask—“

Damian blurted, “Have dinner with me tonight.”

You had never attended a business dinner, what was one supposed to do or say? Weren’t those things for closing deals in terms of money?

You would’ve taken social studies more seriously if you knew one day your uncle would send you to convince a handsome guy to partner with you for a project.

God, that sounded more like high school drama than what it really was.

Telling him you didn’t have a clue as to what to do in such a situation couldn’t be more embarrassing than being caught ogling at him. It would be close, though.

“Are you feeling unwell?”

“Mmh?” You turned to look at him. Concern filled his gaze. He had such vivid eyes, the greenest you had ever seen; greener than you ever imagined nature from a fairytale could look. “Sorry,” you rasped, “I’m fine.”

He gave you a single nod, staring at you in expectancy of something. When you only stared back, he sighed, “I will prepare everything to be signed tomorrow morning if that’s fine with you.”

Tilting your head, you frowned. “I thought you just said I had to have dinner with you?”

“I was asking you out.”

Ah. Wow.

It wasn’t a good idea to say yes, your heart had just been broken. But he was handsome, and blunt enough to estate his intentions without fussing over your misunderstanding — you liked that.

“Did I read the situation wrong?”

“No,” you answered way too quickly. “Not at all.”

He smirked. “I will pick you up at 7, then.”

Happy was surprised by seeing you so flustered as you told him to drive you to the —Wayne owned— hotel you would be staying at.

Not daring to look at him, you asked Happy if he could help you find a dress quickly. You could hear the smile in his voice as he said yes.

In your eyes, there was no such thing as moving on too fast. And even if there was, this was a date and not the start of a relationship. You would allow yourself the pleasure of enjoying a handsome guy’s company, and if you found him unbearable you would just leave — Tony wouldn’t mind.

The last proper date you had been on had happened a long time ago, before you were out of college, if your memory served you right.

Being around someone your age, truly the same age, and not just part of your age range would be a nice change from hanging out with two 18-year-olds, people in their forties, and whatever age Bucky was.

At 6:59, a knock was bestowed upon the door of your hotel room.

“You look beautiful.” The compliment easily rolled off his tongue. It was hard not to believe him.

You bashfully said, “You look handsome.”

He grinned, offering his arm for you to take. He was a little too formal from what you were used to, yet you found it nice.

You understood why everyone followed his orders automatically. In part, it was their job, but it wasn’t yours and you too felt compelled to please him.

He looked different under the soft light, calmer. More handsome. His voice was impossibly smoother as he told you about himself.

All his attention was on you when it was your turn to tell him about yourself. He would encourage you to continue speaking, more comfortable with hearing you than with speaking himself.

You wished you would’ve found Damian unbearable. He surely had flaws, you weren’t one for expecting perfection in people, it was just damn hard to find him one and you liked it, what a nice illusion to part with.

“I will see you tomorrow morning,” he reminded you as if reading your mind, eyes on your mouth as he swallowed harshly.

You bit your bottom lip as you nodded. “Good night.”

Damian left, albeit reluctantly, happier than he thought he would be. Bruce would kill him for skipping patrol, but it had been worth it.

He would let the fact that Tim had been right slide this once.

❖︎・・・・・❖︎・・・・・❖︎・・・・・❖︎

Feeling like a teenager with a crush again, you tried really hard to keep yourself from whining as you left Gotham. Wanting to stay was childish, you didn’t really know the city nor Damian.

New York was home, your mother lived there, your uncle and friends too. And you were being a little dramatic, to be completely honest.

“How did it go?�� Tony asked, throwing his arm around you as he guided you toward the living room.

“It went great.”

“More than great, I would say,” Happy chipped in from behind you.

You whined lowly, hoping he wouldn’t embarrass you. The date had been nice, but it was naive to think something would come out of it when you didn’t live in the same state. You would rather keep that night to yourself.

Pepper smiled. “Tim is a sweetheart, isn’t he?”

Happy hummed, turning around before he would burst out laughing.

Peter saved you from embarrassment, telling you he had a project for you and Ned to help him with. Projects with Peter were always something to behold, they could go from the most anticlimactic thing to testing his constantly improving web fluid formula.

This project, though, was a nightmare. He had the brilliant idea of sewing a teddy bear for MJ. From scratch. By hand. With his own design.

Sat on your office, surrounded by scraps of fabric and tiny strands of thread, tired of stabbing your self while sewing, you told Peter, “I don’t understand why can’t you just use Tony’s credit card to buy her something.”

“Or use a sewing machine,” Ned pointed out.

“It’s more romantic this way. MJ will appreciate it more.”

Ned and you hummed. If you hadn’t known how much Peter liked her, you would’ve given up already.

The door was almost kicked open. Happy entered the office, or at least you thought it was him due to the man’s height, his face and torso were covered by a gigantic flower arrangement that he put down on your desk as quickly as he could let it down without shattering the vase.

“Happy,” Peter screeched, “that’s fabric!”

“Peter, these things are heavy!” Happy mirrored the tone.

You rolled your eyes. “This isn’t Pepper’s office, though.”

Happy snickered. “These are for you, genius.”

Glaring at him, you waited for him to crack. But Happy never did. He snatched the card from on top of the arrangement. “Do you want me to read it out loud?”

“No!” You screeched, extending your hand.

Happy continued nagging you, “Should I use the monotonous voice and all?” He unfolded the thick paper. “Oh, it’s handwritten!”

Your face was burning up. You wanted the chair to swallow you as Happy read, “‘Thank you, again, for an amazing night. I hope to see you soon.’ Signed by Damian Wayne.”

“Couldn’t he text you that?”

Ned defended the stranger, “It’s more romantic this way, Peter. I thought you were an expert in romance now.”

“Wait, wait, wait,” Peter dropped his needle. “You went out with Damian Wayne?”

You only nodded.

“Good thing you weren’t interested in dating anymore...”

Grabbing the pillow behind your back, you threw it at Ned. “Shut up!”

Peter giggled, picking a pillow from the couch and throwing it at you. Ned threw the one you had hit him with at Peter and soon the three of you were laughing historically.

Your cellphone buzzed. With a flipping stomach, as your laughter died down and tears ran down your cheeks, you looked at the screen.

I hope you like them.

Unlocking the device, you typed quickly. They’re lovely.

You bit the inside of your bottom lip, gnawing on it. Fuck it. I hope to see you soon, too.

He replied immediately. You will.

You couldn’t wait.

But you had to. After a few more days of exchanging text messages, he had let you know he would be out of the country for a while. You had hoped to see him at your birthday party but alas.

❖︎・・・・・❖︎・・・・・❖︎・・・・・❖︎

Every few minutes, you were introduced to people whose names you had forgotten already as the guests continued to arrive.

The number of people in the venue was excessive when none of them really knew you. It was strange, being the center of attention when people wouldn’t have cared if you weren’t Tony Stark’s niece.

Pepper had warned you about it, she had said you shouldn’t take it personally. You would’ve had done so on any other occasion, but you were too busy staring at Sharon and Bucky.

Never in a million years would you imagine he would have the nerve of openly displaying his affection toward someone else in front of you. Yet there he was, all over her at your birthday party.

You stuck close to Tony and Pepper for the most part, only straying away when the conversation wasn’t something of your incumbency.

Everyone was seemingly enjoying themselves, Sam had convinced you of dancing with him just so he could ask if you were having fun. Then Peter and MJ did something similar but it didn’t feel the same, they were worried about you which meant you weren’t doing a good job at hiding that you wished you didn’t have to be there.

The contrast between what you had expected your birthday party to be throughout the past weeks to what it truly was had to be one of the most jarring experiences of your life.

Your plans had changed twice, your expectations three times, and your excitement had exponentially lowered as the day arrived.

Pepper pinched your shoulder. “Tony wants to introduce you to some people.”

Following her steps was a skill you hadn’t mastered yet, much less in the uncomfortable shoes Nat had chosen for you. Next time, you needed to remind her you weren’t a skilled spy who could kick ass in any type of shoe.

“The birthday girl!”

“Hi, uncle.”

“Darling, meet Bruce and Damian Wayne.” The sarcasm in his voice didn’t go unnoticed.

You shook hands with Bruce Wayne first, he was as handsome as every photograph of him you had seen made him out to be. He smiled at you as he wished you a happy birthday, adding a nonchalant, “I’ve heard wonders about you.”

Damian’s hands were warmer than his father’s, and instead of smiling at you as he wished you happy birthday, he fixed his eyes on yours, gluing you to your spot.

He then winked, trying his hardest to hide the smug smile wanting to break through his face.

You wouldn’t have stopped staring if your life depended on it. Photographs would never make him justice, he was taller than he looked in them, much more handsome — equally intimidating yet photographs portrayed him as stuck up while having him in front of you had made you find him alluring from the first time.

“Introduce Damian to Peter, will you?”

You nodded in response to Tony’s question. Your surroundings stirred as you were left alone with Damian, with his hand still encapsulating yours.

After a pause, wishing he wouldn’t drop your hand, you asked him if he wanted a drink. Introducing him to Peter could wait.

“Of course,” he answered, sliding his warm palm off yours and motioning with it for you to lead the way.

Sharon and Bucky were at the bar. He had his hand on her hip as they whispered in each other’s ear. You caught her eye, you and your companion, and she winked at you while resting her chin on Bucky’s shoulder.

Smiling at her, you stood closer to Damian. You both ordered your drinks, and he leaned on his elbow against the wooden bar to face you.

“So, why a public party for your first birthday as part of the family?”

You chuckled. “My uncle insisted, and it was a good chance to get introductions out of the way.”

“Can’t say I disagree.”

You confessed, “I thought you wouldn’t be able to come.”

“I wouldn’t miss it for anything in the world.”

Behind you, James got louder, “We should go to the beach again, babe.”

Sharon giggled at her boyfriend’s faux-drunk antics. “Don’t yell, baby, you’ll give (Y/N) an ear-bleed.”

You could tell he turned around when he put his hand on your shoulder. “Hi, (Y/N).”

Only craning your neck to not give Damian the impression that you were impolite, you greeted, “Hi, James.”

You enjoyed his expression every time you called him James. The only person who found it funnier than you was Sam. Everyone else found it normal, you supposedly weren’t familiar with him.

You wished that was the case. Not because you missed him or because he hurt you — it would be nice to not feel tense around the others.

Natasha would pick up on it soon if you continued to tense up when he entered a room next to Sharon and you weren’t ready to come to terms with that. You didn’t know what you would say to Sharon in the first place.

“Here,” Damian’s smooth voice interrupted your train of thought. As you looked to the front again, you found your cocktail being offered to you.

You took the glass, thanking him. “We should move away from here.”

Humming, Damian lifted both eyebrows. His eyes dropped to your shoulder and James’ hand was withdrawn instantly.

“Enjoy your night, doll.”

You wanted to scream at him for calling you that, for still seeking some kind of reaction from you.

Walking past Sharon and her boyfriend, you took a sip of your drink. You would’ve drunk it in one go if you weren’t trying to impress your companion.

The terrace, empty due to the fact that everyone was busy dancing, welcomed you with a burst of crisp air.

“You looked uncomfortable,” Damian said casually.

“I am not used to these things.”

He took a gulp of alcohol. “Are you always that bothered by your uncle’s colleagues?”

If only he knew...

Seeing Sharon happy was nice, though. According to Nat, she had closed off after things with Steve didn’t work out. James must’ve been patient with her, at least you hoped he had been.

You made a pause, one you wished had been longer. “Would it offend you if I changed the topic?”

“No.”

Silence settled between you. Finding things to say had never been easy for you. The fact that he was gorgeous didn’t help your case. Tony should’ve taught you how to flirt instead of sending you irrelevant files before the party.

Damian didn’t look displeased by it. You finished your drink before he did, you were the one gripping the railway. He was close enough for you to feel the heat his body radiated, but he made no move to touch you.

He stared, though. You were trying your hardest to keep yourself from staring back. There was only so much you could focus on that would be more pleasing than his pretty face.

Offering him another drink would ruin this, and not saying anything would make you appear uninterested. You would’ve gotten drunk earlier if you knew he would be back in time for your birthday.

It had been so easy with James. After fixing his arm, he had interpreted your giggles correctly and kissed you. That was it, no flirting or small talk.

“It’ll start raining soon.”

The starless sky proved him right. In an almost comedic way, the sky rumbled just as the words left his mouth.

“Do you want to go back inside?”

He shrugged. “Do you?”

Your eyes met his again. The kink of his eyebrow told you he was waiting for an answer, but you didn’t have one. You would happily stay there, staring into the green vastness of his eyes, come rain or not.

Damian moved closer to you. Expensive cologne awakened your senses, relatively meaningless in comparison to the goosebumps his touch ignited. His hand, firm yet light, rested on your arm as he reached for his drink.

Envious of the glass, you stopped blinking to not lose detail — his full lips trapped the rim of the glass as he gulped the liquid down. Damian put the glass to the side, giving you a full look at his Adam’s Apple bobbing.

Your hand came up to wipe the corner of his mouth, where a drop of alcohol lingered. Damian lightly shifted, lips brushing your thumb as he did so.

You found yourself tracing his bottom lip with your thumb, wondering if it would feel as soft against your own.

He placed his free hand on your waist, gaze on your lips. “Can I kiss you?”

“You don’t have to ask,” you whispered.

Your eager tone encouraged him to dive in. He hummed, tasting the sweetness of the cocktail you had been drinking. His lips were as soft as you had expected, touch heavier on your waist.

The sky rumbled again and he broke the kiss way too early. “We should get back inside.”

You felt eyes on you as Damian and you walked toward the bar once again. His hand was firm on your lower back, this time not shying away from touching you or from uttering comments instead of meaningless questions.

From your spot, you could see a few of your friends. Sam was flirting with one of Pepper’s friends, Nat and Carol were competing over who could handle alcohol better, and Tony was crying out of laughter next to Rhodey.

In front of you, Damian was gazing intently at you again.

“Is there something on my face?”

“Pretty features.”

You tried not to smile but the rush in the pit of your stomach failed and betrayed you. He was so pleased with your reaction, smiling back as he fixed his eyes on your mouth.

You gazed at him, placing your hand on his bicep to boldly ask, “Do you want to go somewhere else?”

Damian finished his drink in a single gulp, opening his palm for you to take. “Wherever you want.”

With your purse on your lap and his hand brushing your thigh, you went through the drive in complete silence.

You thanked the driver, inwardly also thankful over the fact that they weren’t Happy. You wouldn’t have heard the end of his teasing.

Unlocking the door, you pushed it open and let Damian in first. The lights turned themselves on as he crossed the doorway.

You motioned for him to get comfortable. “Can I offer you a drink?”

“Later,” he dismissed the offer, cupping your face with both hands as he leaned to kiss you.

Kissing him back, grabbing him by the neck, you tickled his mouth open. Damian granted your tongue access in less than a second, moving one of his hands to the nape of your head to eventually place it on your back and pull you close.

His hand brushed the zipper of your dress, fingers playing with it as he deepened the kiss. You hummed on his mouth, sliding your hands to his shoulders in order to push his blazer off.

He groaned as he had to part from you to discard the blazer completely, throwing it to the reading chair closest to him.

Grabbing you by the hips, he playfully bit down your bottom lip. You glared at him through your eyelashes; it only made him smirk.

“Did the birthday girl expect something else?”

Fuck. You hadn’t expected his voice to get deeper. Nodding, you took the collar of his shirt between your fingers.

“Take it off if you want,” he gave you his permission lowly, eyes on yours as he uttered the words.

You hesitated. He would expect permission to take your dress off too, and although you were dying to have his hands on you with nothing in between, you couldn’t remember the last time someone had seen your body.

Damian made no movement to pressure you nor to move away from you. He just waited, with his lips pursed and hands steadily on your waist.

You undid his tie first, just enough to pull it over his head. His knuckles traced your spine while you worked on his shirt, easing your nerves up.

Unbuttoning his shirt took you a little longer than you would’ve liked, you had been in high school the last time you had to do that for someone else and you couldn’t even remember their face by now.

You tugged on his belt, looking at him in search of permission. Damian nodded, immediately looking down at your hands as they unbuckled his belt.

You pulled the shirt out of his pants, pushing it then off his shoulders in the same way you did with his blazer. You traced his chest, firm, and littered with birthmarks and a few scars.

His broad shoulders were the same, and his taunt abdomen had bigger scars. You would’ve asked about them if you weren’t eager to lick them.

He pulled you into a searing kiss, mouth hot and heavy on yours while his hands wandered down to your ass. Feeling you huff through your nose, he moved his lips to your neck to give you space to breathe.

You let out a sigh, feeling him inch up the skirt of your dress. Damian sucked on your neck, leaving a wet trail towards the exposed part of your chest.

You whispered his name. He shivered, lifting his head. Taking him by the hand, you guided him to your bedroom. The lights turned on automatically, illuminating the vast room.

Kissing him again, you pushed your body flush against his. Damian gripped your thighs, unintentionally grinding against you.

“You’re so hot,” you blurted, hiding your face in his neck to suck on it.

He tilted his head to give you further access to his skin as he searched for your zipper. When he found it, he pulled it down slowly in case you would protest.

You were too busy tasting his skin to really care anymore. Your teeth scraped his Adam’s apple, making him let out the sweetest sound you had heard.

Goosebumps ignited your skin as he dragged his hand over your bareback. He groaned, realizing you weren’t wearing a bra.

Stepping out of the dress looking over your ankles, you bent over to pick the item up and threw it onto your vanity chair.

You found lust-filled eyes checking you out and fuck if having Damian Wayne looking at you like he wanted to eat you a confidence boost.

His palms brushed the sides of your breasts, thumbs close to your nipples, only teasing.

“You’re so beautiful,” he breathed out, nose brushing your cheek.

He nibbled on your pulse point, making you moan. Your hands again explored his chest, this time following the marks of his abs too. Reaching the waistband of his pants, you finally popped the button open.

Dragging his zipper down, you felt his semi-hard cock twitch due to the contact. He hissed, blowing air on the small bites he had peppered over your neck.

He moved to the side to discard his shoes, socks, and pants. You freed your feet from the heels, now remembering how uncomfortable they had been seconds before you met Damian.

He rubbed against your ass, wrapping an arm around you from behind. His teeth grazed your ear, free hand exploring your body painfully slowly.

You ground against him, desperate for something more. He chuckled on your ear, cupping your clothed pussy.

Whining as he pressed his thumb as deep as your panties would allow him, you craned your neck to kiss him.

Damian dragged the hand on your belly upward to cup one of your breasts, pinching your nipple. He swallowed your moan while kissing you.

You twisted one of your hands, reaching for his thigh. As you inched your hand closer to his cock, you felt his breath hitch.

From on top of his underwear, you palmed his cock. You struggled to put your hand under the cotton material, and when you finally did, both of you groaned.

Enveloping the base with your fingers, you moved your hand up and down, using your thumb to apply pressure when needed.

“Wait,” he rasped. “You first, it’s your birthday.”

“What if I want to make you come for my birthday?”

His cock pulsed in your hand at the question.

Turning around with the intention of pulling his underwear down, you briefly let his cock go.

He kicked the boxers to the side, swallowing thickly when you grabbed his cock freely now. The movements of your hand were more enthusiastic, thumb circling his tip.

Biting his bottom lip, he fixed his eyes on your hand and its rhythm. You tapped his tip, bringing a string of pre-cum as you lifted your thumb.

He hissed, you smiled. Tightening your fist around him, you searched for his expression to make sure he was okay with the amount of pressure. Damian closed his eyes, sighing out.

You slid down to the floor, sinking to your knees. Holding his cock still, you licked the pre-cum off his tip.

Damian’s eyes flew open. His hand came down to hold your face. The gesture encouraged you to suck on his tip. He chocked on a hum when you pushed your head down, taking as much of him as you were able.

“Shit, (Y/N).”

You hummed, feeling yourself getting wetter. Using your hand, you fisted his shaft, bringing your fist upward as your mouth withdrew from him and moving it down as you took him in your mouth again.

His sounds got louder as you found a rhythm, and the bobbing of your head along the twisting of your hand got quicker as his cock throbbed on your tongue and fingers.

You hadn’t lied when you said you wanted to make him come, you needed to know you could please him that way.

You sucked more harshly. He reacted by moaning so loud it rumbled like thunder, hand holding your head by the neck as you sucked harder and harder.

Slurping sounds filled the room, and when Damian thought there was no way things could get better as he watched his cock enter and leave your mouth, you made eye contact with him.

All fucking night you had gazed at him through your lashes, every fucking time it had gone straight to his cock. The difference was that this once around you had him panting.

You continued sucking as he came, bringing your hand to massage his balls while gulping. He cried out your name, fingers digging on your jugular.

Feeling him get soft on your tongue, you pulled away but not before giving his tip another lick.

You placed your hands on his heaving chest, leaving small kisses on his jaw, meanwhile he recovered his breath. He had broken into a sweat, his damp skin glistened under the light.

Damian walked you back onto the bed, hovering over you.

He gave you a short kiss, still trying to even his breathing. He then attached his lips to your neck, kissing his way down your chest. Making a stop there, he sucked on each of your breasts.

Dragging his lips down your torso, he took the time to kiss the stretch marks littered there. When he reached your navel, he gazed up in search of permission.

“Go ahead,” you gave your consent.

He slid your panties off in a swift motion. His thumb brushed your clit while his index and middle finger prodded your entrance.

Not able to hide his smirk, he collected some of your wetness only to bring his fingers to his mouth. You squirmed, watching as he licked his fingers clean.

Damian latched his mouth onto your clit, making you squeal in surprise. Your hand fell onto his head, gripping his hair tightly.

He introduced his fingers to your pussy again, curling them up as he sucked on your clit. Your hips jerked upward, almost bucking although you were able to control yourself.

He was having none of it. Using his tongue, Damian alternated between sucking and licking while his fingers stretched you as he scissored you.

You draped your unoccupied arm over your face, biting down your forearm.

Speaking against your clit, he ordered, “Don’t. I like hearing you.”

Unconsciously, you let out a sob and grabbed his hair with both hands. Pushing him further in between your thighs, you could feel his nose brush your labia.

Writhing under him, you tried your hardest to not press your thighs together. Damian took his fingers out to help you, gripping your thighs with both hands to hold them open.

He ate you out like he had been born to do it, loudly and messily. His tongue didn’t leave a centimeter unexplored, he lapped and licked until he had you crying out his name.

And he didn’t stop when it got too much and your thighs shook in his grip, instead, he increased his rhythm.

You had never had someone drink your juices like a dehydrated animal yet there he was, licking you up clean.

Damian peppered kisses over your thighs, grip around them barely loosening. You were seeing white, hearing his breathing, and feeling his soft lips against you with an intensity you weren’t sure if it was natural from him or not.

Sliding a hand down the side of his head to cup his cheek, you beckoned him back up. Damian obliged, fitting himself between your legs.

“Are you alright?”

You hummed, leaning upward to kiss him. His tongue slid into your mouth, and as he ground against you, his hard-on became palpable. You bucked your hips up, smiling when he groaned into the kiss.

“You sure?”

“Yes.”

He filled you to the brim by shoving his cock inside you all at once, making you grab him by the biceps. He was snug inside you, and the fact prompted you to clench around him.

God, you had had intercourse like five weeks ago and yet you felt like this was the first time you were fucked in years.

“You feel so good,” he praised in a low voice.

You moaned and his cock twitched inside you. Damian threw patience out of the window, thrusting shallowly.

He grabbed your hands and pinned them to your sides. You stayed still for a moment until he intertwined his fingers with yours.

His eyes, so dark you swore they could swallow you, were on you. Just on you, not on the headboard, or the wall, or the ceiling. They were on you, he was ramming into you because he wanted you.

You cried out — his name, a string of curses, something you couldn’t even understand. And he ate it up, he relished on every sound and expression. You felt it in his strong grip and deep thrusts, heard it in his own moans, he loved the effect he was having on you; it stroked his ego, and fuck if it didn’t tip you to the edge.

“I wanna come,” you whined.

“Nobody’s stopping you,” he promised through heavy breathing to then kiss your jaw. “Please, come for me.”

You did. He asked oh so nicely, with hot breath on your skin and relentless thrusts. You couldn’t not do it even if you tried, how could you disappoint him?

It was the second time he had you trembling, and you hoped it wouldn’t be the last. You wanted him closer, yet there wasn’t a way for him to be closer to you than with the tip of his cock crushing your g-spot.

His strings of cum were as welcome as everything he had to offer, heavy and hot. Feeling him all around you was like a distant dream. His hot cum and pulsating cock weren’t even the best part.

You woke up to a warm bed, between strong arms. Fingers traced your side, stopping at every curve and lump.

The first thing you saw when you opened your eyes were vibrant green eyes already analyzing your face. You had forgotten how bright his eyes were.

Damian’s skin glowed in the morning light, cheekbones only more prominent from your angle.

“Is there something on my face?” He teased you.

“Handsome features,” you teased him back.

Huffing a laugh, he brushed your hair off your face. “You’re gorgeous.”

You held his gaze. “I’m afraid there’s no compliment you haven’t heard before.”

“They sound better coming from you.”

“You’re a real charmer, huh.”

“I’m trying.”

You leaned onto him, not really sure as to what to say now. Feeling the shake of his shoulder as he laughed, you couldn’t help but laugh too.

“What are we laughing at?”

“I had meticulously planned how slow we would take this and now you’ve got me naked in your bed after our second date.”

“Is that a bad thing?”

His arm tightened around you, pulling you even closer. “Of course not. I like you.”

“I like you too.” You kissed the scar he had on his shoulder, and the one on the crook of his neck, and the almost faded mark under his jaw. “Will you ever tell me about your scars?”

He hummed, “But not today. It’s your birthday, we should talk happy things.”

“It isn’t my birthday anymore.”

“Birthday weekend,” he clarified.

He left the bed for a moment, going through the pockets of his pants. You pouted at him. Chuckling, he approached the mattress again, phone in hand.

Giving you a short kiss, Damian placed his free hand on the back of your head as he guided you to lay on his chest.

“Is there anything you would like to do today?”

You considered the question. “I don’t know. I haven’t had a free weekend in a long time.”

❖︎・・・・・❖︎・・・・・❖︎・・・・・❖︎

Your ‘birthday weekend’ officially started with waiting for him outside a changing room. He needed to buy clothes for the weekend, arguing that it would be stupid to go around the rainy city in a tuxedo.

“Did you really have to buy another watch?”

He defended the splurge, “This one is more casual.”

Pursing your lips in attempts of keeping your laugh in, you nodded. Damian pried your fingers open to fit his own between yours, squeezing them once in a teasing manner.

You looked down at your connected hands, marveled by the fact that he was willing to show he was dating you.

Spending the weekends together became the norm, he kept clothes and his favorite self-care products at your place, he already knew the house and sauntered around it like he owned it too.

A particular Friday, you bumped into Sharon and Nat in the elevator. Nat pushed the button that would take you to the first floor as Sharon asked, “Do you want to go to the baseball game with us?”

You smiled at her. “Next time, yeah?”

“You’re busy tonight?”

You nodded, shifting your coat to drape over your other forearm.

“Got a hot date?” Sharon lightly elbowed you on the side.

A nervous giggle escaped you, “I do.”

The doors slid open and you stepped out first. You didn’t mind their company, you just liked your boyfriend’s more.

Peter was talking to James near the entrance hall, nodding enthusiastically. He caught your eye and waved at you past Peter’s shoulder.

As you had to approach them to leave the building, you wished them both a good night and continued your path.

Avoiding James had been extremely hard throughout the weeks, he tried talking to you a few times and every time you found an excuse more ridiculous than the last.

The shower in your bedroom was running, meaning Damian was there already. You changed your clothes in the meantime, happy to finally be in comfortable clothes and away from The Compound.

You were plugging your cellphone in when the bathroom door was loudly unlocked.

Damian struggled to fit his arm in a sling, groaning in frustration. Approaching him, you moved his healthy hand away from his arm and did it yourself.

He nodded at you as a thankful gesture.

“Are you telling me what happened to you?” your question was soft-spoken.

“I got in a fight.”

You narrowed your eyes at him. “You? A fight?”

“You should get used to it.”

Looking up at his towering figure, staring directly into his eyes, you actually glowered at him. “What is that supposed to mean?”

He extended his hand for you to take, fingers open, expecting yours to find their place between them. You shook your head.

“Why are you mad?”

“Really? Are you that dense?”

He mimicked your tone, “Are you that worried?”

“Of course I am worried, Damian! If you don’t want me to worry about y—“ you stopped yourself when his hand brushed your forearm.

“I never said that,” his voice lowered, “I simply asked.”

Sliding his hand down to press his palm against your own, fingers caressing yours, he intertwined them like he had missed doing the entire week.

You murmured, “Could you at least not get injured too often?”

His face softened, and just then you observed how swollen it was.

“I have something to tell you,” he sighed, briefly looking at his feet before nodding to himself. Completely lifting his head, he continued, “I shouldn’t say it now, but I don’t feel comfortable with you not knowing...”

“What did you do?”

“I am Robin.”

Of course you had fallen for a secret vigilante. That was your luck, your boyfriend lived miles away from you and spent his nights punching people in the face. It was a better secret identity than the ones other rich people tended to have, you would give him that.

One more worry to have on your shoulders.

“Why are you so tense? I’ve already promised to be careful.”

“Long week,” you mumbled. Eager to change the subject, you asked, “Are you hungry?”

“I ordered food a few minutes ago.”

Humming, you let his hand go in order to sit on the bed, stretching your legs.

“Habibti, what is going on?”

He knew what he was doing by using the petname. He sat on the bed too, letting enough space between you to look at you properly.

“Sharon and Nat invited me to go out with them tonight and I feel bad. Like really bad,” you confided him.

“You can go if you want.”

“It’s not that... Forget about it, yeah? It’s not worth it.”

“You’re upset, that means it’s important to you.”

“Don’t get mad,” you warned him.

“Well, now I’m worried.”

“Before meeting you,” you clarified before saying anything else, “I had a... fling... with Sharon’s boyfriend.”

He hummed, encouraging you to go on.

“But I think they were dating already. I don’t know... their relationship was secret and—“ you groaned. It was so pathetic. “Whatever I had with him was secret too.”

“And you want to tell her.”

You twisted your mouth upward as you nodded. “Is it a good idea?”

Damian nodded slowly. He threw his healthy arm around your shoulders, placing his hand on your farthest arm. “You would like her to tell you if it was the other way around,” he asserted, “so I believe it’s only fair for you to do it.”

Inhaling his body wash, you nuzzled against his bare shoulder as carefully as possible, afraid of hurting him. The ability he had to make you feel safe was astounding.

He changed the subject, sensing you were done with the topic. “Do you want me to tell you about my scars now?”

❖︎・・・・・❖︎・・・・・❖︎・・・・・❖︎

You had been seconds away from also telling Tony about what you once had with James just you wouldn’t be forced to fix his arm. Ultimately, you stayed quiet because Pepper had an appointment with the gynecologist and Tony wanted to be there with her.

You were regretting not leaving after they had. He had attempted to make small talk a few times, as if it was normal to talk to the person you cheated on about the weather.

He then started to get into your nerves. “How long do you think your boy toy can keep up?”

You ignored him, tightening the arm the way you had seen Tony do many times.

He continued taunting you, “He has to drive for what? Two hours? Or summon a helicopter just to see you. Sounds like too much trouble.”

Setting your jaw, you moved away from him. “Your arm is done.”

He stood up, following your movements. “Have you fucked him yet?”

You glared at him for asking such inappropriate questions. He trapped you between his bulk and the wall, breathing on your face. You moved your head to the side. “It’s none of your business.”

James placed his hands on your thick waist. “That’s a no, then,” he mumbled, lips grazing your cheek.

You could only think about those photos and how he had rested his hands on Sharon in the same fashion, of Damian’s hands and how different they felt on you — warm, firm, heavy but never burdening. You pushed James’ flesh hand away from you.

His metal hand dropped to your hip where he gripped tight so you wouldn’t move. “We both know he’s just a rebound, (Y/N). You miss me.”

“You have a girlfriend and I have a boyfriend. Please, move.”

“Sharon broke up with me.”

You had assumed she wouldn’t. After your talk with her, she said she would have a discussion with him. She hadn’t been angry at you so you had thought she just didn’t care.

“That doesn’t change the fact that I have a boyfriend.”

Resting his weight on you, he chuckled. “You don’t mean it. You love me, it’s obvious.”

“I’m going to scream if you don’t move,” you threatened.

Moving his flesh hand upward, he wrapped it around your neck. “Just admit it.”

“Please, move,” you begged him.

He covered your mouth with his hand instead of choking you, applying pressure as you tried to exhale against his skin. “You always have to make things difficult. Talking all the time, making noises... How many times didn’t you almost give it away because you couldn’t keep your eyes off me?”

Tears ran down your eyes and he let go of you immediately, hurt all over his face as you tumbled your way out of the lab.

Locking yourself in your office, you let out a sob, unable to contain whatever it was you were feeling.

What if James was right and your relationship with Damian was doomed?

You couldn’t even ask him his opinion at the moment, he was out of the country due to a mission and the little contact you had wouldn’t give you time to talk about such things with him.

Besides, you didn’t want him to break up with you through text. You didn’t want to break up, period.

And fuck, you missed him. And missing him was... different. Everything that had to do with him was.

When you missed your mom, you felt the sadness of a child on their first day of school, desperate to cling onto their mother’s leg.

Missing your dad was absurd, it only came in waves that crashed against everything you stood for, against everything you had gone through; it was bitter, raw, merely wishful thinking in the form of what-ifs.

Longing for Bucky’s touch had been, surely, the stupidest form of missing someone. At the time it had been inoffensive, now it was only a bad memory.

The way you missed Damian, though, with the hopeful yearning for the bliss only his laugh had ever brought you, and the craving of shared silent moments that often culminated in kisses... it felt like missing someone for the first time.

Stark Industries was a better place to spend your time than the laboratory when Tony wouldn’t be there either. Bruce usually could do things by himself and often preferred it.

You were informed that you had a visitor. Allowing however it was to come in, you felt your heart skip a beat when Damian closed the door behind him.

He smiled at you, observing the smile you gave him back didn’t reach your usually lively eyes.

Damian snaked an arm around you, placing his hand on your hip. You hissed, prompting him to withdraw his hand. “Did you have an accident?”

Not giving him an answer, you leaned onto his shoulder so he wouldn’t think he couldn’t touch you. In fact, you needed him to do it, desperately.

“What’s wrong?”

“Just... can you hug me?”

Anyone else would’ve repeated the question, with the intentions of helping most likely, but Damian wasn’t like other people. He wrapped an arm around you at the height of your waist while his other hand rested on your upper back.

You hugged yourself to his torso, eventually sliding your arms under his armpits in order to have him closer.

He didn’t ask anything, he didn’t try to pull away quickly or to make up an excuse to leave. Damian just held you, more than content with giving you the comfort you were seeking.

You heard the door being opened again. Tony had the tendency of not knocking. If your door was unlocked, it meant he could enter and retrieve whatever he wanted from your office.

You expected Damian to part from you. Although a little uncomfortable due to the lack of privacy, he didn’t. He stared at Tony, as if daring him to tease either of you.

Tony tried to keep a chuckle in. “I’m sorry to interrupt you lovebirds. I updated your Starkpad, (Y/N). I left a few instructions for the week there.”

You parted from Damian reluctantly, avoiding his eyes as you took the pad from Tony’s hands. “Will you be out of town this week?”

Your uncle nodded. “Pep wants to visit her family and who am I to deny her?”

You almost smiled. Tony kissed your forehead, patting Damian’s shoulder on his way out.

“I’m sorry about tha—“

Damian cut off your explanation, “It’s not your fault.”

You nodded, placing the new pad Tony had given you on the desk. Damian cupped your cheek, caressing it with his thumb.

Leaning into his touch, you nuzzled your face against his palm. “Can I ask you something?”

“Anything.”

“Does visiting me bother you?”

His face turned serious as he frowned. “Where did you get that from?”

You shrugged, avoiding his eyes again.

“It would be nice to have you closer, I can admit that, but some selfish reasons are at play there.”

“That wasn’t the question, Damian.”

“It doesn’t bother me. I simply wish I could see you every day.” He made a pause, then continued, “That’s new to me, I’ve never minded being alone or having piles of work to do.”

“Why would that be selfish?”

He was the one who avoided your face this time, looking at the light being reflected on the screen of the pad. “It’s not. But I also don’t like the way Barnes looks at you, for example.”

“Because of my history with him?”

Damian corrected you, “Because he’s geographically closer. And sometimes I would prefer to be the only one who ogles at my girlfriend. Seeing as I can’t stop people from staring, I never complain.”

You took his hands, intertwining your fingers with his. He smiled softly.

“I only have eyes for you.”

Damian’s lips enveloped yours. He kissed you softly, tenderly as he slid one of his hands off yours to hold your face again. You rested your free hand on his waist, angling your head.

Brushing your lips with his, he whispered, “And I only have eyes for you.”

This time the smile you gave him did fill your eyes.

❖︎・・・・・❖︎・・・・・❖︎・・・・・❖︎

You felt nauseous. You were doing a shitty job at keeping your nerves at bay for the first time in many months.

You chugged down a glass of water in one go, sighing out through your nose. Then you refilled the glass and gulped down some more liquid.

Sharon stretched to reach for a glass herself, softly calling your name. “Are you falling sick?”

Oh, God. This would be extremely awkward. You weren’t avoiding her per se, there was no real reason to do it, but you definitely would find ways to not be around her.

If only your mom wasn’t busy with work...

Refilling the glass, you took it with you and sat down on your usual seat around the table. “Have you ever met a partner’s family?”

You almost said ‘James’ but that would have been disrespectful to both of them, and you actively avoided mentioning him in general.

Taken aback, Sharon rounded the table to sit down in front of you. “A long time ago. I don’t think it’s thaaaaat common anymore. Why?”

“Damian wants me to meet his mom.”

“You don’t know his family?”

Lifting the glass, you drank a small sip of water. “I’ve met everyone but her, and she’s visiting soon.”

She hummed, opening his takeout plate. “You don’t want to meet her?”

“I don’t think I can impress her.”

Picking her fork up, she moved it around so you would go on.

You stayed silent, however. There wasn’t much to explain there, everything you knew about his mom terrified you.

“Has he met your mom?”

“Yes.”

“Does your mom like him?”

“Yeah, they get along well. B—But this is different. Like... from what I’ve heard his mom has super high standards. I’m going to fuck it up, Sharon! And I’m really into him!”

She shook her head, wiping her mouth with a napkin. “No, you won’t. How many times hasn’t Pepper complained about him specifically?”

“A lot.”

“And you charmed him! You got the difficult one of the family wrapped around your finger already.”

“Damian isn’t difficult,” you defended him, “people just aren’t willing to give him a chance.”

She smiled at you, humming. Instead of teasing you, she asked, “You know what you’ll wear?”

You shook your head. “He said something casual would be fine. It’s just lunch according to him.”

“I’ll help you.”

You were the shocked one this time. While never confirming it, you suspected she knew the truth about what happened — if that was the case and she still was willing to help, she was way nicer than you had initially imagined.

Damian approval of the outfit she helped you choose was encouraging, he said you looked beautiful in it just like Sharon had complimented you when you tried the item on.

When the day arrived, however, you were having second thoughts. He looked worried, tense even. You weren’t the only one who was having a bad feeling.

He gripped your hand tightly, fingers crushing yours as you walked into the restaurant together. You wanted to ask, for your sake obviously, but mostly because you had never seen him in such a state.

His mother's eyes, sharper than his, scanned you up and down. Damian rolled his shoulders beside you, making you feel the ripple of his muscles.

Sharon, while helpful, had been extremely wrong. This was definitely worse than Jason’s shock over the fact that there was someone who was willing to date Damian.

Damian had told you beforehand to be ready for an interrogation. He openly called it that which prepared you rather well. You didn’t stutter, or cowered under her intense gaze.

Talia didn’t make the comment you assumed she would, the one regarding your physical appearance. Instead, her critique was almost sound.

“You should date someone you have more things in common with, Damian.”

“You should get to knew her before coming to assumed conclusions.”

Talia glared at him. “You know what I mean.”

Damian glared back. “And you know I do not care.”

“I want what’s best for you.”

“Well, I love her, she makes me happy. What are you going to offer that is better than that?”

He said It oh so naturally, like it was ingrained in his vocabulary. There was no hesitance, the words weren’t tender either — the tone had been sharp, he was daring his mother after all.

And you couldn’t stop thinking about it.

The drive toward his family’s lake-house, now so familiar after how many times you had visited, felt significantly longer than it was. Damian never drove in silence if the two of you were alone, and that was 99% always the case.

You were dying to say something, but what? Words would fall short, you couldn’t stop replaying how easily those three words had slid past his lips. Had he meant them or was he only being stubborn for the sake of fighting his mom?

He unlocked the front door, letting you in first.

You hadn’t attempted to cross the living room when his hands were already on you, burning your skin through the denim fabric. “You look amazing in these jeans.”

“Damia—“

He shut you up with a kiss, hands ghosting your sides as he tilted his head to barely deepen the kiss.

You broke the kiss begrudgingly, asking, “Can we talk?”

He grunted, leaning to hide his face in your neck.

You spoke either way. “I don’t want you to have a bad relationship with your mom because of me.”

Lips brushing your skin, breath giving you goosebumps, he tried to dissipate your worries, “She has attempted to murder me a couple of times, the relationship has always been complicated.”

“Oh, honey...”

“It’s fine.” He kissed his way up to your cheek. “It’s not your fault.”

“She’s your mom.”

“And you’re my girlfriend. If she really cares about me, she’ll understand.”

“Yeah,” your voice cracked, “b—“ he didn’t give you a chance to say anything else. He pressed you against the nearest wall and kissed you with as much passion as a human being could muster.

His strong hands were tightly gripping your waist, nose puffing air on your face as his mouth swallowed your sounds. Your fingers tangled in his hair as you gave in, pulling him closer with your forearm against his back.

Breathlessly dragging his mouth down to your neck again, he inhaled a lungful of air before sucking on the smooth skin. Your perfume filled his nostrils, making him hum as the vibration of your throat caused by a whimper was felt on his lips.

You said his name in a strangled voice, trying to keep a moan in. He hummed so you’d speak, moving to another spot on your neck to leave another love-bite. “We need to— fuck” His right hand had moved to your back and slipped downward to grope your ass.

He trailed kisses down the exposed part of your chest, sighing contently on your breasts. “We need to fuck?” he teased.

“We need to talk about what you said,” you were able to get the words out before moaning again when he bit down your neck only to soothe the sting with his tongue.

Humming, he searched for the hem of your blouse. “There’s nothing to talk about,” his lips touched your skin as he spoke, “I love you, she needs to get it through her head.”

You grabbed him by the neck. Damian allowed you to lift his head, gazing at you. Inching a hand up to rest it on his cheek, caressing his bottom lip, you told him, “I love you too.”

Turning his head, he kissed your palm. Moving lower, he kissed your wrist.

You cleared your throat. “What are you doing?”

He smiled on your wrist. “I don’t know,” he admitted, “I like your skin.”

You huffed a laugh. He moved both of you away from the wall, pulling you onto the couch.

You shifted in your seat, resting your legs on his lap. Damian placed his hand on your calf, absentmindedly rubbing circles on your clothed skin.

He slowly trailed his hand up, reaching your thigh. Breathing in, he searched for your eyes. “Are you staying today?”

You shook your head.

Damian huffed.

“Don’t get grumpy with me.”

He withdrew his hand, messing with his hair instead. Sitting up properly, you expected him to say he wasn’t mad, he often understood how busy you were throughout the week.

Instead, he decided to avoid your face while speaking, eyes on everything but you. “I meant the other part too, you make me really happy. I adore you, I want to spend more time you!”

“You will,” you promised, placing your hand on his thigh in assurance. “I have a lot of things on my plate right now, that’s not your fault, I know, but I’m doing my best.”

He dropped his hand on top of yours. You feared he would push it away, childishly so. Damian gave your hand a squeeze, lifting it off his lap to kiss your knuckles.

You smiled, puffing air out through your nose in relief. Feeling him smile against your hand, you allowed yourself to believe things would work out just fine.

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