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#rip my sweet children you were fun while you lasted
the-power-of-stuff · 1 year
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I'm one chapter and an epilogue away from "the words to keep you" being complete on AO3, which made me wanna look through my 7k+ words of deleted scenes. 😅
In an earlier draft of the story, I had more interaction between Suki and Kanna during the Southern Water Tribe chapters, but I ultimately scrapped the scene, for a bunch of reasons.
For one, I struggled a lot with the tone of those chapters, but eventually I felt I wanted to keep things light-hearted and fun, at least until the big angsty moment at the end, and this interaction between Suki and Kanna felt a bit too heavy and introspective to me. I also didn't completely love my characterization of Kanna in this section. And I wanted more Suki and Hakoda time and couldn't figure out how to make it work if I kept this scene with Kanna.
But! I still kinda like the scene overall, so I wanted to share it anyway. Here's a bit of Kanna giving Suki a subtle what-for.
“Hello, Suki,” Hakoda said with a warm smile, extending his hand. They gripped forearms. “It’s good to see you again.”
“It’s good to see you too, sir,” Suki said, grimacing inwardly. She’d finally gotten comfortable enough to call Hakoda by his name about a year-and-a-half into her relationship with Sokka, but that comfort was fully eroded by now. Hakoda’s smile was sympathetic, but he didn’t correct her, and she did her best to ignore the lump in her gut.
“Excuse me for interrupting, but Sokka, I need you to help your grandmother while I go finalize some of the details of the celebration with Katara.”
“Sure, Dad, what’s up?”
Hakoda leaned in closer. “She insists on carrying the stew pots to the square by herself,” he said in practically a hiss, “and I told her that Healer Amka forbade her from lifting anything heavy after the last time she hurt her back, but she won’t listen to me.”
Sokka clapped his father on the shoulder and then shot a wink at Suki. “Don’t worry, Dad, I’ve got it under control.”
Just then, Kanna walked out of one of the igloos with a large cast iron pot dangling by its handle from her knotty hands. Hakoda widened his eyes at Sokka and whispered, “See?” between clenched teeth.
“Hakoda, stop pestering the children,” she said, and Hakoda rolled his eyes while he still had his back to her. Suki covered her hand with her mouth before Kanna could see her laughing.
“Gran Gran!” Sokka cried, jaunting past his father to intercept the older woman. “Can I help you with that?”
“There’s three more stew pots in there,” Hakoda said to Suki quietly, pulling her out of her thoughts before she could get too swept up in how endearing the whole situation was. “Make sure he gets them all?”
She nodded, feeling quite conspiratorial when that earned her a pat on the shoulder, but even after he walked away, Sokka hadn’t managed to get his hands on a single pot.
“Nonsense,” Kanna was saying, chin high. “I don’t need any help.”
“I know you don’t need it, Gran Gran, but I’d really like to help you anyway. Whaddaya say? As a favor to me? Your favorite grandson?”
Suki approached the pair with her arms crossed. “Sokka, this woman used to change your diapers, your sweet talk doesn’t work on her.”
Sokka narrowed his eyes at her, a silent accusation, but before he could feel too betrayed, Suki leaned close to whisper in his ear, “Your dad said there’s three more pots inside.”
When she pulled back to confirm he’d understood, she couldn’t help but notice how wide his pupils were, and the heavy bob of his Adam’s apple when he swallowed. Then he nodded, and Suki ripped her attention away from him.
“Kanna—”
“Call her Gran Gran,” Sokka hissed.
“I mean— Gran Gran! I brought something special from Kyoshi Island for you, to thank you for your hospitality. If I may, I’d love to give it to you before we all get distracted by the celebration.”
Kanna looked back and forth between Sokka and Suki before she finally gave in and handed the pot to her grandson.
“Very well,” she said. “That sounds lovely. Thank you, dear.”
As she led Kanna back to Sokka’s room to get the gift from her bag, Suki turned to give Sokka a wink over her shoulder. He gave her a wobbly smile in return and then walked off with the stew pot in his arms.
“You two make quite a team,” the other woman said, with the same casual confidence she might have if she’d said, “Your name is Suki.”
“Oh, I don’t know about that,” Suki said, laughing nervously. “Okay, wait here one sec, I’ll get your gift…” And then she ducked into Sokka’s igloo.
A shiver went through her at the intimacy of being in Sokka’s space alone. Like she was waiting to surprise him with a clandestine affair. Like he was keeping her there to have his way with later. She locked her focus firmly on her bag, unreasonably afraid of what it would feel like to see the rest of his room, grabbing the gift and then jumping back out into the open air as if she might suffocate if she stayed inside any longer.
“Oh, so there was a gift,” Kanna said, eyeing the bundle in Suki’s arms with a soft smile.
“Of course! Did you think we were trying to trick you?”
“I wasn’t sure, with all that whispering back there. People think just because I’m old, I’ve stopped paying attention. But I pay more attention now than ever.”
Suki rolled her shoulders against the sudden prickling between her shoulder blades. “Your family’s just looking out for you, Gran Gran. I’m sorry if we made it feel like we were deceiving you.”
“Never mind that,” Kanna said, waving her hand through the air. Then her smile turned bright, smoothing away a couple decades from her face. “What have you got for me?”
“Well, for the past few years, my warriors and I have been working to improve our relationship with the other villages on Kyoshi Island, and through that, we’ve discovered some amazing artifacts.” She unfurled the bundle and held it out to Kanna. “This parka looks like sealskin, but you see the boxy, geometric pattern in the embroidery? That’s very typical of traditional Kyoshi Island clothing. We thought this must be from sometime before the war, when there was open trade between our island and the Southern Water Tribe.”
Kanna took the parka and draped it over one arm.
“This is definitely sealskin,” she said, her fingertips running gracefully over the delicate embroidery despite the large knobs in her knuckles. “It’s a bit weathered from lack of care, but nothing a little whale oil and stitching can’t fix.”
“I did the best I could,” Suki said, “before coming down. I’ve never been very good at mending…”
She bit her lip when Kanna reached up to place one hand on her arm. That prickle between her shoulder blades was back, but this time she resisted shrugging it away.
“This is a beautiful gift, Suki. Thank you. And I can see the effort you put in to restoring it. That was very thoughtful.” She ran her fingers over the seams. “Perhaps Katara or one of the other girls can help me with the stitching. My dexterity isn’t what it once was.” And she wiggled her fingers slowly by way of demonstration.
“Nimble as ever!” Suki argued. “Between you and me, you probably could’ve carried that pot just fine on your own.”
“Perhaps,” she said, and then she smiled up at Suki. “I was young, once.”
“Of course you were!” Suki laughed.
“Back then, I gave up everything,” Kanna continued, “my family, my home, everything — to go after the life I knew was right for me. My Pakku…he found me again eventually. Perhaps it was fate, and we truly weren’t meant to be together until now. Or perhaps we were just two very stubborn people who made choices we couldn’t take back. If I could do it all again, well…I would do it the same. But, I don’t have much time left anymore.”
“Gran Gran…” Sometimes Oyaji made comments like this about his foregone youth, and Suki never knew what to say in response. She felt no better equipped now.
“After I’m gone, I’ll still be watching from the spirit lights. And even though I wouldn’t change a thing about my own life, I would hate to see my only grandson get to be my age before he feels truly settled in his.”
Oh… Why had she thought they were legitimately talking about parkas and Pakku? And why had she thought she would make it through this trip without a talking to from the matriarch of the Southern Water Tribe?
“I don’t want that either, Gran Gran,” Suki replied. And it was true. But how much control could she possibly have over something like that? How much responsibility could she take?
“Thank you very much for the parka, dear. This is quite special.” Kanna lifted her hand to Suki’s face. “I never knew a time when there was a strong partnership between Kyoshi Island and the South Pole. I hope I live long enough to see it.”
Suki closed her eyes on a sigh.
“Now!” Kanna said suddenly, clapping her hand onto the antique in her arms. Suki opened her eyes to see an indulgent smile on the older woman’s face. “I think you’ve sufficiently distracted me. Shall we go see if my grandson has managed to transport all four of my stew pots by now?”
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endlessly-cursed · 2 years
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Carrying On the Legacy (BTS Challenge)
A/N: After days being stuck in this, I have finally completed it!! This is my entry for the day one (even though it’s long gone, rip) for @cursebreakerfarrier ‘s challenge. The Sapiehas belong to both @slytherindisaster and @mjs-oc-corner tagging @gaygryffindorgal​ since Malcolm also makes an appearance 
Summary: Vincent Somerset starts his Hogwarts years 
Word Count: 1.2k words 
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1st of September, 1912
As the carriage drove towards King’s Cross, Vincent Somerset looked through the window as his sisters wreaked havoc, giggling and fussing with each other’s dresses. One of them --he couldn’t tell if it was Jocelyn or Lenore-- slammed her elbow in his ribs and he cried out “Ow! That is enough, girls! We are in a carriage and Mother and Father expect us to be in our best behaviour! Can we please not do this now? Mayhaps when I’m gone? I’m representing Winbourne here.”
Alexandra nodded “He is right. Let’s give it a rest, shall we? Let us play a game! I spy with my little eye…” Vincent squeezed his sister’s hand and she gave him a knowing smile.
Minutes passed when the children’s carriage door opened and Vincent, as rehearsed, got out of it gracefully and with poise, a stoic face and his chin up and shoulders square, meanwhile the youngest giggled and messed with each other’s ribbons. Many of her mother’s former classmates greeted her and he walked beside her as his father took care of his sisters, scolding them with kindness. They were now under scrutiny and needed to be on their best behaviour, though he doubted either Lena or Jo knew what ‘scrutiny’ meant. He politely smiled at his parents’ friends as Jocelyn went to see her future in-laws, Prince Henry and his wife, the Duchess-Princess Cora and their son. He gave him a brief nod and continued listening to the Sapiehas, and chatted with the three children; Joseph, Elisabeth and Winifred.
“Joseph, ladies. I trust this summer treated you well?”
Elisabeth laughed “There is no need for politeness, Vince. We are old friends here.”
“Yeah, there’s no need. Maybe we’ll share a room, Vince!”
“If the Sorting Hat decides to place us in the same house, I’ll look forward to it.”
He offered his arm for one of the girls to be escorted and Elisabeth placed her small hand on the crook of his arm while Winifred chatted with Joseph. He greeted other fellow future classmates on the way as they neared their first stop: that goddamned wall. He looked at Joseph and smirked “Race you there?”
“Last one will buy three chocolate frogs!” He cried and he followed, giggling as the girls followed them behind. Vincent sprinted and closed his eyes… before feeling a whoosh all over his body and then finding himself in the station. His sisters emerged from the wall one by one, and he noticed Joseph was a few seconds late. He smirked and he sighed, defeated “Alright, I know when I've lost.”
They waited for their parents and his mother, even the picture of poise and elegance, seemed emotional about this. She hugged him rather tightly “My boy. My son and heir. It seems like yesterday when I held your tiny frame in my arms and here you are, about to embark to Hogwarts.” She hugged him again and he kissed her cheek and she kissed his forehead “Remember, my boy, though you are for now Winbourne’s representative at Hogwarts, you are also eleven. Do remember to have fun and rest, alright?”
He nodded and his father hugged him tightly “Good luck, my boy, and remember who you are and where you come from, and to be kind to others.”
He nodded “I will make you both proud of me. I promise.”
Then he turned to his sisters and smiled fondly, opening his arms as they all went to hug him and kissed each of their foreheads “... and remember not to give Mama too much of a headache. Yes, I am looking at you, Lena.”
Lenore pouted but nodded “Alright, but you better send me sweets from Honeydukes!”
“Hey, me too!”
“And me!”
He laughed, “Worry not, girls, all of you shall have your monthly gifts.” He looked back and saw that the train would leave at any time now. His mother drew him closer and kissed his forehead and whispered “I love you, my boy. Go before I come to my senses.”
He nodded and went up with Joseph, both chatting as the train took off. Lenore chased it for a while, waving goodbye and yelling something he couldn’t understand. He waved back and hoped for the best.
Hours later…
At long last, he was getting in the boat that would take him to Hogwarts. He was nervous, but thrilled, looking forward to living amazing adventures like his parents did. Maybe he’d meet his future wife there, his aunt teasingly told him, hing that disgusted. Sure, girls were cute, but he didn’t want to think of that now.
He looked down on his Hogwarts robes. His heart beat incredibly fast. The place where his parents fell in love… He squared up his shoulders and, alongside Joseph, followed their guide towards the castle; it was certainly bigger than Winbourne, and with magical properties, but it also had things in common: history of it within the walls, a safe haven, a safe home… a refuge for those who sought it.
They went upstairs and the teacher started to explain “You must be sorted into your houses. There are Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw and Slyherin. Each house will be like your home. Your triumphs will be celebrated with house points… and your failings will be punished with its revoking. At the end of the year, the house with more points will win. Now, let us get inside.”
Vincent held his tiny head high and followed along, not at the head of the group, but neither at the back. The descriptions of his parents made no justice to what it truly looked like. Ghosts roaming the walls, students laughing and eating, Professors chatting and analysing their new students. It was like a book had been made real.
He waited patiently until the teacher cried “Somerset, Alexander Vincent!” And whispers began to run as he approached the seat and the Sorting Hat.
“...That’s Lady Gray’s son! I’d recognize those eyes and hair anywhere!”
“Do you remember when she sneaked out of Hogwarts to duel that duke?”
“To think that she sat here and chatted with her friends!”
He took a deep breath as the Sorting Hat was placed on his head “Hmm, what do we have here? It is Primrose Gray’s firstborn! I’d recognize you anywhere. Indeed, you have her intellect as well as your father’s bravery… Hmm, I see… Let it be… Slytherin!” He cried.
The table cheered, proud to have the son of one of the most famous and heroic women to have ever passed Hogwarts in their house. The Head Boy greeted him and granted him a neat seat, and as the others were sorted, he took in where he was now: Hogwarts, the place where the greatest wizards and the deadliest ones had studied here once. Where his mother had shaped herself as a woman.
As the dinner came to an end and the head boys and girls led the new students towards its dorms, he took a deep breath. A long time ago, his late grandmother Victoria had come here so she could escape a dangerous marriage and with no other place to run from it, and came out as a loved and feared woman. His mother Primrose came to prove herself and find a meaning to this newfound power, and now he had a different purpose: carry on the Somerset legacy and show that the Somersets remained as strong and powerful. With his shoulders square and looking at this new challenge in the eye, he entered the dorm, ready to prove that he was his mother’s son.
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icharchivist · 9 months
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Hi icha how did the summer stream treat you? I cried and bawled over the cast shenanigans on twitter and then the news hit me like a truck and I haven't recovered since
I had two friends over and they were sleeping while I was watching the stream (12hr difference with japan on my timezone, so the streams are always very early in the morning) and when they started to announce the skins and saw six I started to cry and fell backwards on my bed, waking up one of them (they later told me they were already awake but I still felt bad)
I was so sure we would get wamdus as one of the summer skins but I guess I was wrong, now I'm wondering if they're going to even continue with the dragons skin rotation, maybe they move wamdus to halloween (daily event focused once again on stardust with the children maybe?) and we end up with christmas/new years luo
And oh damn. Lobelia uncap sure took a turn I genuinely wasn't expecting, if anything his arcatales pose was more in line to what I was thinking we would get coming from him. Happy for his career change and wishing him luck as an opera singer /j
On any case this later half of the month for sure is going to be interesting, and everything else that's coming. Sorry for the long ask,,- have a good day!
Hey hey hey!! so good to see you omg!!
oh my god yeah i thought of you when I saw Seox, it's truly an attack on you in particular. The whole idea of the sleepover was so sweet though but rip your friends for the brutal awakening. Worth it though. For Seox.
And yeah, it's surprising no summer Wamdus, perhaps they really want to be more safe with her and push her to Halloween indeed... if they finish this rotation at all at this rate. there's also Ewi in need of a skin, unless they consider that her base unit works as one...
i could see more Stardust themed Halloween mini event though yeah!
And DLKJFDLKFJFD RIGHT. His Arca tales's art slaps a lot and it is so on brand that to then see his uncap was jarring. Like, yeah i know in theory that they are supposed to change outfit, and also that with their uncap they represent more their own arcana rather than just their summons (like Nier representing more and more The Lovers to accompany Death and stuff) but damn!! the guy truly went in a sharp different direction. I'd say "silly him, the opera isn't going to mask the fact he's a serial killer!" but now i just remembered of a famous masked opera guy who's also a serial killer so. Maybe it's more on brand than i thought.
August indeed seems to be quite the crazy month after all of this, i'm so hyped!!
No worries about the long ask, i'm really glad to see your thoughts and it's fun to see you hype!
As for me, i admit almost 90% of the announcement hit bullseyes for me. Seruel finally getting his summer unit, Yukata Vania, Sandalphon's Ex pose, both Seox and Makora's skins, the Grimnir stuff, just how cool Lobelia's Arcatale skin is (what can i say i appreciate aesthetic depiction of his type of madness).
But out of all the announcement, i genuinely screamed aloud when the Meg&Mari duet was announced. Out of all the announcement i didn't expect this would me the one that would physically actually make me scream, but in the end, it's pretty on brand as well.
Genuinely probably the best set of announcements we've had in a long while, i remember being completely lurkwarm to some of the announcement last year, so the fact almost everything was a hit is really making me happy.
i'm so happy with what we got, i'm so happy for MeguMari, and i'm so happy for you and Seox jumping you like that ;DDD
Hope you take care and you rest well after all of this!!!
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cyclogenesis · 3 years
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i have to tell you that the second i saw cal and ash on that mountain getaway a couple weeks ago, i thought about how desperately i would love a sequel to your turks & caicos fic set during that trip. (this is not a request, i promise, i just wanted to tell you bc that is one of my fav fics of all time)
Aw anon!! 🥺 Gosh I hadn't even thought about that when I was in my feelings about the mountain getaway pictures, which is wild because I am just remembering now that I started a fic after the honeymoon comment initially happened (like, very soon after, because @elliebirdthings was at that show and told me about it and we were freaking out haha), before we knew that they went to Turks & Caicos, and I had them taking that trip to a cabin in Maine.
Just for kicks, because this message made me smile and I love you for that, here's the beginning of that fic. It's unfinished obviously (not even any kissing!), but there's some nice stuff in there I think. This fic was going to be titled A whole fucking lifetime of this after the American Pleasure Club album which was a title I should have kept, goddammit. Also randomly in here I have them driving to the cabin while listening to My Bloody Valentine, who Ashton later called out as one of his main influences for Superbloom.
1600 words of unfinished Cashton under the cut! 😘
The day after the last meeting about the promo schedule the dressing room conversation turns, as it does, to plans for the break. It’s a month out, but they’ve to a man developed a fetish for planning their free time carefully as soon as the schedule’s set. Planning things makes Ashton feel like a grown-up. He likes renting cars. Sometimes he scrolls through AirBnB for hours just to see what’s out there.
“I’m going straight back, we got Dodgers tickets,” Michael says.
“I remember when you used to say ‘we’ and it meant you and me,” Calum says. He wiggles a little from where he’s snuggled against Michael on the couch like he wants to get away, but of course Michael doesn’t let him. Ashton thinks he probably wasn’t really trying.
“Aw, you’ll always be my first love,” Michael tells him, squeezing Calum to him more tightly. “You wanna make out just for old times sake?”
“I do not,” says Calum, but he lets Michael give him a big kiss on the forehead, his face squinching up happily.
“I just wanna get away for a bit, no work or social media or anything,” says Ashton, ignoring their tomfoolery. “A little cabin by a lake somewhere.”
“Oh yeah?” Luke says. “Where are you and Cal going this time?”
“Maine,” Calum says, at the same time as Ashton says, “Why would you assume we’re going somewhere together?”
A small silence falls over the room.
With dignity, Ashton says, “Calum and I are going to Maine.”
“Just get out in front of it this time,” Michael advises. “Let everyone know it’s another honeymoon. Take control of the narrative.”
“How many times can you go on a honeymoon before you have to acknowledge that you’re married?” Luke asks nobody in particular.
“It’s a bro trip,” Ashton says firmly. “For bros.”
“It’s very bromantic,” Luke says. “It’s okay, I’m not hurt I wasn’t invited. I love going back to LA and jerking off alone.”
“It’s nice that we’ve all got plans,” Calum says. He’s settled peacefully back against Michael, Michael absently petting his hair.
“It’s not a honeymoon,” Ashton insists.
*
Whatever, Ashton called it what he called it, okay? Might as well control the narrative.
Over drinks at the bar after their last show Calum asks, “Where would you want to go on your honeymoon, anyway? Somewhere new?”
Ashton pokes at the ice in his cocktail with his straw. Aren’t they supposed to not be using straws anymore because of the ocean or whatever? Ashton loves the ocean, it’s very important to him. Also this cocktail sucks. “Can I try your drink?” he asks. “I don’t love mine.” Calum has something with ginger in it, and bubbles. Calum slides his obligingly over, and Ashton passes his own over to be fair.
“I like yours better,” Calum says after a sip. “You wanna trade?”
Sometimes Ashton does believe in soulmates. “Yes, thank you.” He takes a long drink. “It would be nice to spend more time in Italy. Not one of the tourist-y parts though, somewhere quiet. Up north, maybe, one of the smaller towns.” He tries to picture what it would be like: olive groves, blue skies, stone churches. An old villa with lemon trees and a view of the hills. He’s so used to traveling with the band or just with Calum that it’s hard to picture anyone else there with him. They’re all as prone as anyone to get swept up with girls to the exclusion of most everything else, but Ashton can’t really imagine a future without seeing Calum all the time, without talking to him every day. Maybe he and Calum could just get married around the same time and they could all go on a honeymoon together.
“Yeah, that’d be pretty nice,” Calum says, looking wistful. Ashton wants to take a picture of him, capture the way a curl rests against his temple, how the blue neon lights behind the bar hit the glitter he let Ashton smear on his cheekbones before the show. They made a no social media pledge for this trip but Ashton’s bringing his camera anyway. He has to keep in practice, doesn’t he? Anyway, it’s important to capture these memories.
“Maybe we should just go,” Ashton tells him. “Why not? Who knows how long it could take for me to fool someone into living with this forever?” He sucks down the last of his drink, feeling sorry for himself now. What if he falls in love and she moves in and Calum stops coming over in the morning to walk to their favorite coffee shop together, and stops picking Ashton up so they can go hike Runyon, and stops bringing Duke over like he owns the damn place and doesn’t care about the dog hair that Ashton has to hoover off his couch pillows? That would be terrible. Worst of all, what if it was Ashton that suddenly wanted those things to stop?
“I’ll live with you forever,” Calum says, too busy flagging down the bartender to intuit Ashton’s emotional crisis. He gestures to Ashton’s empty drink. “Another one of those, right?” His own is still half full. Maybe he didn’t really like Ashton’s better after all.
“Yeah, thanks man,” Ashton sighs.
Calum bumps his knee against Ashton’s, the barstool squeaking beneath him. “Ash, you’re gonna find somebody if that’s what you want. Anyone would be the luckiest person alive to be with you. Maybe we could do Italy after the tour wraps, we’ll finish in Spain so it won’t be far.”
The thought cheers Ashton a bit; that’s a decent amount of time to get on AirBnB and see what he can find that’s available. It’ll be nice to have something to look forward to, Italian sunshine and limoncello and the quiet.
“Mike and Luke will definitely give us shit though about planning another honeymoon while we’re still on this one,” Calum says.
“Let ‘em,” says Ashton.
*
It’s not a long flight but it’s a bit of a drive from there to get to the cabin. But Calum said he wanted something remote and quiet, so it’s worth the wait, the drive in the dark. There’s moonlight, anyway, and Calum took the wheel, getting them the rest of the way there in their little silver Prius rental. He puts on My Bloody Valentine and sings along, low and comforting to listen to after so many days straight of playing, of promo. Halfway through the trip Ashton thinks he sees a shooting star, maybe thought he dreamed it until he felt Calum’s soft nudge of knuckles against his arm, heard his quiet, “You see that, bro?”
The way gets bumpy, thick with trees, dark and hard to navigate once they turn off the main road. At the end of it all there’s the cabin, looming in the dark, lights left on for them and the key exactly where it’s supposed to be. It’s past one a.m. but they still give the place a wander, stopping at the largest bedroom facing the lake. Through the floor-to-ceiling windows Ashton sees trees, darkness, the black glitter of water under starlight. Calum asks, “You want this one?”
Ashton looks further and just sees more darkness. “It’s kind of unnerving at night,” he says. “Anyone could be out there.” The other bedroom has smaller windows, but the point stands. “Do you wanna just watch TV or something in here and then decide?”
“If we get axe murdered here I hope our ghosts come back and leave a one star review,” Calum says, but he’s already shrugging his duffel off his shoulders and kicking off his shoes.
The host left them a bottle of pinot grigio so Ashton pours up a few glasses while Calum strips down to his boxers and gets in bed. The boxers have cartoon pugs all over them. “I can’t believe that’s the lingerie you’re wearing for our honeymoon,” Ashton says, handing him a glass. “I also can’t believe those boxers even exist.”
Calum raises it to him in a salute and takes a sip. “These boxers are fantastic, but I guess if you want me to take them off…” he trails off, eyebrow raised, thumb hooked in the waistband pushing them down past his hipbone, then further until Ashton can see the crease of his thigh.
“No, no,” Ashton says hurriedly, “I’m just saying, what’s wrong with a nice pair of footie pajamas? Keeps you warm. Keeps you modest.” Nevertheless he shucks his own clothes except for his own (very grown-up, perfectly normal, in a flattering shade of dark green) boxers and joins Calum in bed. Calum’s already stopped paying attention to him, too busy trying to figure out how to work the remote. He finally gets the screen to flash on, and Ashton stays quiet, sipping his wine while Calum flips channels, finally landing on something in black and white. Cary Grant comes on screen but Ashton still isn’t sure what movie it is; Calum seems interested enough, setting the remote down between them, so he doesn’t complain. The wine goes down easy and Ashton does too after not too long.
He rolls onto his side and sees that Calum’s eyes are already closed. It doesn’t look like he’s asleep yet; it always takes him a bit, leaving him in a dozy stage for about ten minutes during which he might respond crankily to any communication or with adorable mumbling affection. Ashton turns the sound down and says, as quietly as he can, “TV off?” Calum’s eyes don’t open, but he nods a little. “Okay. You want me to go sleep in the other room?”
Calum moves then, a sleepy shift of his body, fumbling a hand up and blindly patting the sheet until he makes contact with Ashton’s hand on the remote and squeezes it, links their fingers together like he can’t quite figure out how to make it work. It feels nice. “’S’okay,” he murmurs. “Stay here.”
Ashton didn’t feel like getting up anyway.
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Sweet Betrayal
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Part 2     Part 3     Part 4
Spotify Playlist (collaborative)
Warnings: swearing, neglect, successful suicide attempt, death, insanity
(A/N): I had a little too much fun writing this
“I’ll help you.”
Tommy cheered and clapped a hand on your shoulder. Wilbur gave you a slightly manic smile, his plan is going to work out perfectly with you working with them. Techno merely grunted in acknowledgement. Something about your tone threw him for a loop, but he just summed it up to the voices and his growing trust issues. The voices were screaming at him not to trust you, that you were a traitor, that you’d betray them. But there’s no way his youngest sibling would ever betray them; they couldn’t hurt a fly. They were basically defenseless. 
Tubbo looked slightly hesitant to accept you as his spying partner, but he figured that you joining him would take most of the stress off from his shoulders. You were close to Schlatt, he basically treated you as if you were his own. He was slightly jealous at how close to his father you were when he, Schlatt’s biological son, was often standing in the same room as them. He knew that Schlatt was a shitty father and could never shape up to being as good of a father figure than Philza was to him, but he just couldn’t help but feel hurt at the fact that his own father, who abandoned him at the side of the road as a kid, so readily took on another kid that wasn’t himself. Despite his resentment towards you, he accepted having you as a partner. Maybe once he got to know you better you weren’t so bad. 
On the outside, you were giving your ‘brothers’ a sweet smile. Almost sickeningly sweet as you plastered it on your face to hide the resentment and hatred brewing inside of you threatening to escape and fill this ravine with it’s raging waves. They were never your brothers, always choosing to exclude you from everything they were doing. As a kid, you had nobody to rely on. Tommy had Tubbo and Wilbur had Techno and Philza. You were completely, utterly alone as a kid. 
You were always deprived of social interaction, always being told to ‘suck it up’, ‘quit whining’, and ‘just accept it’. You watched from the sidelines as your brothers received all the love and support from each other and Philza, and you were sick of being left out. Their proposal has made you finally reach your breaking point. You came to the realization that you were only going to get their support only when you were of use to them. 
Even as adults and as teenagers, they’re always acting like children. Whining over losing power, getting exiled, how ‘tyrannical’ every single government was, like get a grip. You brought this upon yourself. Manberg would be much better off without you two. Just accept leadership, it’s there to bring natural structure to society. This isn’t high school, stop overreacting. Oh, how you longed to scream in their faces, drop the happy, sweet, and defenseless facade you always wore. You were broken down by them, and you were going to be their downfall. You would make sure of it. At least, that’s what Schlatt promised you. 
You met Schlatt one day when you were alone in the forest far from the house you called home. It was dark out and you were hiding from the mobs that threatened to take one of your lives. He found you by following your whimpers, taking you back to his house and giving you shelter for a few days. He treated you like you were a person, an actual human being, and that made you realize that you weren’t alone in the world afterall. Philza and your brothers didn’t even notice that you were gone until after a week of staying with Schlatt. You remembered how Philza stormed into Schlatt’s house, grabbed you by the ear, apologized to Schlatt, and drug you home lecturing you the entire time. You were grounded for a month after that and banned from talking to Schlatt.
However, you still talked to Schlatt in secret. He eventually treated you like you were his own, showering you with the love and support that you were deprived of. You supposed you craved constant reassurance and kindness, and you chopped it up to how you were raised. You had trauma and Schlatt was there to fix that. He gave you constant support, something your ‘family’ has never done. Well, they did once when you finally broke and fell into a deep depression, never leaving your room. They didn’t notice that, but what they did notice was the death message that flashed across their comm tablets: “(Y/n) suffocated.”
When they ran to your room, they caught the last of the golden dust that used to be your body drifting into the atmosphere. In the center of your room hanging from an exposed pipe in the ceiling was a noose fashioned from an old rope they had noticed had gone missing a few weeks ago. It didn’t take a genius to figure out that you hung yourself. 
For a solid month after that, they treated you like they treated each other and you felt like you were soaring the entire time. Philza even told you that he loved you and that he was proud of you when you ate your first meal in a week!  All of the attention and support faded when they saw you smile more and laugh louder. You faded again into obscurity and all that came out of that successful suicide attempt was not your family’s unconditional love like you had hoped, but an ugly scar that wrapped around the entirety of your neck.  
You were going to fuck up their plans. They deserved it for ostracizing you all those years. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Your and Schlatt’s plan was unfolding swimmingly. Your idiotic brothers had no clue of your betrayal and that always made you want to laugh hysterically, but you held it in until you got back to the White House. You would laugh in Schlatt’s office with him. The cabinet often heard loud, boisterous laughter booming from behind the closed office doors, but they’ve long since learned not to question it. 
They grew wary of you two, it seemed that your sanities were turning into slippery slopes. The Emperor and the Secretary of Defense could not be fully trusted to make any decisions anymore. Even Quackity, who loved his adopted kid to death, agreed that they couldn’t be trusted. You and Schlatt had changed so much from when he first started dating Schlatt. It hurt him to see his husband and his child slip into insanity.
While you were planning the festival with Schlatt and Tubbo, it was extremely hard for you to keep a straight face. Whenever Schlatt wasn’t looking, Tubbo would smirk and glance at you from the corner of his eyes. It was in those moments specifically that you would struggle the most with containing your laughter. Originally, Schlatt was only going to exile Tubbo for his treachery, but after the fiasco with the lame excuse of ‘farming totems of undying’, you convinced him to turn it into an execution. You organized every single part of Tubbo’s execution, it was perfect in your opinion. At the same time, you were giving Schlatt information of your brother’s whereabouts during the festival. You were going to put on a show for them.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
On the stage, you were shifting and fidgeting relentlessly from your position between your adopted dads. From an outside perspective, one would assume that you’re nervous to be on stage in the middle of the spotlight. Everybody outside of the cabinet and your fathers still saw you as the innocent kid that wouldn’t hurt a fly. How wrong they were. Tubbo’s speech was the hardest to sit through, Quackity had to have a tight grip on your hand to prevent you from rushing the teenager and caging him too early. 
After Schlatt gave you the signal, you, him, and Quackity quickly trapped him in a cage made of yellow concrete. You could hear the shocked gasps of the audience and saw Wilbur holding Tommy down from revealing their hiding spot. Schlatt gently nudged you up to the microphone with a kind smile. 
You walked confidently up to the podium and gave the audience the widest closed-eyed grin they’d ever seen on you. “Hello citizens of Manberg, other guests,” you opened your eyes and shot a smug smirk over to your older brothers on the roof. You took great pleasure in the look of hurt, anger, and betrayal in their eyes. 
“What you are going to witness today is my pride and joy. As it turns out, our dearest Tubbo here,” you turned around to give a grandiose gesture at the cage behind you, “is a filthy little traitor.” The last word ripped itself from your mouth like a rattlesnake spitting venom at its victims. 
Tubbo banged on the walls in a rage, “you were a spy too! YOU WERE A SPY FOR POGTOPIA TOO!” 
“On the contrary, dearest Tubbo. I was a double agent working for Schlatt, my father. I was never loyal to Pogtopia. Why would I be when you all used me?” You gave him a gentle smile. The insane and malicious glint in your eyes contrasted the kindness of your features. You turned back to the podium with that same smile. The combination of your words and your expression sent cold chills down the spines of the Manbergians. They now saw you as who you really were. 
“Now, since I was so rudely interrupted,” you shot a glare at the shocked boy behind you, “hm, where was I?” You rubbed your chin in false confusion before you perked up, “oh right! What you are going to witness today is the public execution of our dear friend Tubbo.” You broke into a series of manic giggling, pounding your fist against the wood of the podium. The gasps of the audience sounded like music to your ears.
“TECHNOBLADE, GET THE HELL UP HERE BROTHER! YOU HAVE THE HONORS.”
You shouted through your laughter. Technoblade climbed up the stairs and stood facing you with a harsh glare. You grinned at him as he spoke to you with his usual monotone voice. This time, there was an undeniable angry undertone you could clearly detect, “what do you want me to do?”
“You still have that rocket launcher, right?”
He pulled it out of his satchel. You squealed happily and jumped up and down clapping your hands excitedly, “good! I’ve always liked fireworks. Now be a dear and make Tubbo go out with a bang!”
He walked over to face Tubbo’s cage and pointed the crossbow at him. You could see his finger trembling over the trigger and a nervous sweat gathering at his brow. After a while of seeing no firework action, you grew impatient and started to furiously shout at him.
“WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR, BLOOD GOD? WHAT, ARE YOU TOO MUCH OF A PUSSY TO DO IT NOW? KILL HIM! BLAST HIM TO SMITHEREENS! FUCKING DO IT.”
With every word that left your mouth, you stepped closer to him until you were screaming into his ear. You felt immense pleasure when you saw him start to shake. When you heard the shooting of fireworks and the agonized screams of Tubbo and saw the colorful blasts, you felt like you were on cloud nine. It was beautiful. 
Your insane laughter was heard over the chaos that followed. Schlatt and Quackity, seeing Techno’s growing anger after killing Tubbo, moved to push you behind them. Quackity wrapped his wings around you in a tight hug before fireworks were shot at your family. After you pushed Quackity away from you, you saw your father’s corpse lying on the stage floor. It was clear that he had just lost a life. 
Quackity collapsed to the stage with a groan before he briefly passed out. You checked if he was still breathing before you looked at Technoblade with anger written clear on your features. You gave a furious shout before you charged at him, determined to kill the unkillable. 
You dodged the fireworks that he shot at you before you finally reached him. He dodged your flailing arms and the attempts to push him off from the stage with ease. “I SHOULD’VE KNOWN NOT TO TRUST YOU!” 
His shout was dismissed by you, not registering in your clouded mind at all. He grabbed your arms and threw you to the edge of the stage. Before you could get up, he stomped a foot down on your chest and pointed the rocket launcher at your face. You were not phased by this, grinning and laughing with insanity-filled glee.  “KILL ME TECHNO! DO IT, GO ON! FUCKING DO IT. BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!”
He stared at you with the most anger you’ve ever seen from him before he pushed you off the stage with a simple kick of his foot. As you were plummeting to your death, you saw Technoblade point the rocket launcher at you before you saw the colorful rockets shooting at you. Your laughter ending abruptly with the explosion of fireworks and the thump of your bloodied corpse against the pavement was something the citizens of Manberg would never forget. 
Your brothers stared at your corpse as it disappeared with shock and anger. They never suspected you of all people to be a traitor, they thought you were the sweet, naive kid they knew growing up. They thought your allegiance to them would be unbreaking and you’d follow them blindly. Obviously, they were wrong. There was no saving you. You were too far gone. 
When you woke up with Schlatt and Quackity holding your hands at your bedside, all of the memories flooded back to you. They held you as you cried in frustration, wiping at your tears with gentle, reassuring smiles and loving words. Rage filled you as you remembered how they got away with their lives. You had one life left, and you were going to dedicate it to their downfall. Even if you died in the process. They should fear the day you return. There was no saving them from your wrath. 
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sunsents · 3 years
Text
Empty - F.W (1/2)
Gah daym this was a JOURNEY to write. I swore to myself to never write angst because, well I suck at it. But here we are, I swear this has a good ending because my heart can't bear that. I could've written this much better, so I promise to bring my A GAME for chapter 2. Enjoy, also Lee in this is a hate crime. This is very story telling-esk so I hope it flows well.
I wouldn't have written this chapter without the help of my good friend @mochiixjimin she helped me edit and spice up this whole thing so thank you so much to her! She's an amazing writer, go check out her work and show her some big love right now or else!! her wattpad
Chapter 1 out of 2 (Backstory)
Summary —> Life has always been a cruel joke to you, yet you simply play along. Overshadowed by Eva Burke your whole life, watching from the sidelines while everyone flooded each other with love, it would always feel like a joke.
Pairing: fredweasley x fem!reader
Word count: 6.1k
Warnings: ANGST ANGST ANGST (with a fluffy ending in the second part) / One mature scene (18+) and then it's angst again <3 / Some slander / Offensive language
Rating: 18+
DON’T REPOST MY WORK
You were a bright child.
Beaming bright enough to keep a tight lipped smile during flu-shots, and enough to put on a happy façade when your dad threw away the drawing you had done of your family dog, rather than hang it up on the fridge.
Children have foolish dreams, and that was yours. Your friends in preschool boasted about their pictures being hung like trophies on fridges, with decorative magnets and even bigger pink bow ties.
The fridge in the Y/L/N manor was empty. Always empty, just how Ms. Y/L/N liked it. Empty marble floors with empty rug designs, and empty rooms with even emptier people living in it. They were both empty people. Hollow and void of any emotion, at least towards you.
You were different though. You were filled to the brim with ambition and hope and so many positive emotions that your parents never seemed to reflect on you. You were like those Disney princesses. The princesses always had hope, and when you have hope good things happen.
Right?
Your dad never meant to give you false hope. He just wished you’d keep your mouth shut as he worked until late hours. Using big words and having big aspirations, you shouldn’t have.
Mr and Mrs Y/L/N weren't bad people per say, just busy. They didn't know how to raise a child, this was obvious, because the purpose of even having a child was to fix their marriage. But a temporary fix wouldn't do it, it never did. There was always that hole on the roof, leaking rain of despair into their falsely built home that no bucket big enough could hold back. Because it always found a way to overflow.
They didn't know how to show their love, so they did it with money, clothes, toys and crayons that you would later use to draw pictures of your family, only to have them end up in the dumpster once again.
They spoiled you rotten, bought you gifts you never even dreamed of asking. You just shut up and enjoyed it, what else could you do? Whine and demand attention? Risk losing their favor? There was no favor to lose.
You got yourself a fat A plus on your third grade math test. Star stickers on your chest, you entered through the glass double doors of your house with a crooked smile - two front teeth missing of course - making your joy all the more endearing. Your backpack strapped tightly over your narrow shoulders, hanging low with all the crammed books you pushed before leaving school because you were just so excited to show your parents.
You received a big sloppy kiss from your Nanny, who practically was like a second mom to you, and dashed right into your fathers office to show him your new accomplishment.
"Good job, I'm proud of you."
You froze. You found a way to actually get their attention. The attention you so craved, the recognition you would die for. This was revolutionary. Basically a new era for you.
Nanny made you a star shaped cake that night, and sat with you while gently stroking your hair and listening to you blabber about how easy the math questions were. It felt warm, motherly love. Even if it was false, it would never compare to the love of your own mother, a love you would never get.
You spent all your night studying, your eyes burning under the harsh light of your lamp in the early mornings and your pencil, ebbing away over sheets and sheets of blank paper. Writing away your little hands off until they ached, just to snatch another A and get a good job.
This was good, it worked out very well. You became that student who looked forward to class, just to get a good grade and have the validation of your parents. The sight of your father’s lips quirk up even in the slightest, and how your mother’s eyes shone briefly in appreciation of your hard work, even if it was for a quick second, it was worth it.
Until the new neighbors moved in.
Mr. Burke was a round, cheerful man with an even rounder belly, and a big fat pipe that always hung on his lips. Mrs Burke looked and acted like those fairy godmothers you adored. You couldn’t believe such people existed. Mr Y/L/N invited them over for dinner, for courtesy. He was not happy about said courtesy.
He ended up liking the couple, they had a little daughter called Eva, who was small and adorable with round red cheeks and big doe eyes. Not only Mr and Mrs Burke, but the Y/L/N’s adored Eva as well. She was happy, always smiling, and her teeth weren't nearly as crooked as yours, not to mention she had pretty long hair like a princess.
You liked her a lot, took her to pick flowers, showed her the drawings you had prepared for the empty fridge; in case Mr Y/L/N ever had a change of heart and hung them up, you had been trying for three years and weren't giving up any sooner.
Eva was nice, kind enough to share her M&M's and very used to compliments unlike you. She seemed to get a lot from her parents and yours. The adults were so kind to her, always smothering her with love and kisses. You were happy for Eva, happy that Eva somehow managed to gain the favor of your parents before you did.
Little girls tended to be jealous, you weren’t. You were just glad to have a friend so cool, she didn't blush and stutter under praise and apparently her drawings were pretty enough to go on a fridge.
It was a Thursday afternoon when your mom smiled at you for the first time since your last exam grade. "Look, Eva drew us a picture, isn't it pretty?"
The crayola stash under your bed was no longer needed, they appeared clumsily dumped in the neighborhood trash the next day, most of them stomped under the pressure of your little sneakers. And the bundle of drawings you hid under your pillow, wishing on fairy godmother that one day they would be hung up too, were ripped; clearly a struggle given. You had paper cuts on your hands, and your Nanny thankfully applied ointment before Ms and Mr Y/L/N noticed, or rather, stopped to care.
Though you knew that even if you paraded herself with bloody fingers dripping to your elbows, they wouldn't care.
Nanny did, she was there. There when you were haunted with nightmares when the moon was particularly dark, cooing at you and letting you sleep next to her in that small bed of hers. There when you tripped and fell, small scratch resulting in a screaming tantrum. She was gentle, sweet, paid well.
You decided to go and pick flowers with Eva, and make a pretty flower crown for yourself, months after your drawing incident. Of course, you didn't have such silly dreams anymore. You didn’t wish to have your pictures hung, to have your mother wear the flower crowns you made and frankly you didn’t care for the sight of the sparkle in your parents eyes. Nanny’s was enough.
Eva agreed, dressed in a pink tutu Mrs Y/L/N gifted. You didn't comment, though deep down you gazed at the skirt in sparkling envy. Your mother never bothered to get you such pretty things. The two of you gathered saturated petals and nice ribbons while giggling amongst yourselves. Until, you accidentally caused Eva’s flowers to levitate.
Eva ran home, crying and calling you a witch. Mr and Mrs Y/L/N’s dirty looks made her feel shameful, and even dirtier when a letter addressed to her was dropped by a pretty owl you insisted on petting. It was from a school called Hogwarts, in the faraway land of London, and it seemed, not only you but Eva got the same letter the next day.
Though the Y/L/N’s and Burke’s were proud of Eva’s letter. They weren’t with yours.
— — — —
The ride to Hogwarts was interesting to say the least. You had so many questions unanswered, were you a fairy godmother too? Was that your destiny? Was that the reason you never got any attention, because you were destined to give instead of receive?
Eva was cheerful as always, making fast friends in newly bought uniforms and holding a pretty, long and thin wand, with designs flowing across the premise. Your wand was...functional. You were sad you couldn't choose, and that the wand chose the owner. It didn't make sense, what if you didn't want this wand? What if you wanted something charming like Eva’s? It should have been mutual.
It was while trying to find your way to the bathroom that you met the Weasley twins. Quite handsome, a year older and absolute fucktards. A word you learned from the two. Though you always found yourself laughing more at Fred’s jokes, you liked them both equally.
“Hey George! Look.” Fred had exclaimed, clinging onto his brothers shoulder and dragging him across. “Who's that girl?”
You introduced yourself, happy façade on, gentle words slipping out of your mouth like nectar. They had to like you, you told yourself. Just this once, more than Eva.
When sorted into Gryffindor, Eva, you and the twins became inseparable. Your group grew in second year, when Katie, Lee and Alicia Spinnet joined the bunch. You would make fun of the ghastly Potions Professor Snape, and imitate Dumbledore in the hallways to mess with the older students.
You loved your time at Hogwarts, and the adventures that came every year. Especially when Harry Potter joined.
“Hey Fred.”
Fred, who was fiddling with his bracelet you had bought him hummed in response, not bothering to look up.
You sighed, “Do you think the flowers can feel it when we pluck them?”
Fred turned at that, his bracelet was now tightly secure after his struggles. “I hope not.” he smiled, a faraway look on his face whenever he gazed at you. “You know, some people like pain.” he winked.
You merely looked at him confused, clearly way too young for...whatever that is.
He started laughing loudly, slapping his knee and causing you to scoff and slap him on the shoulder.
Third year was when it bloomed. The slight girly attention you gave Fred grew. Fred was...Fred. A handsome ginger, beater for their house's Quidditch team, always charming and charismatic that somehow oozed out of him whenever he did anything really. It was not unusual, every girl in school had a crush on him. That wasn't the case, Fred was one of your best friends, and you refused to entertain the idea of a possible...relationship.
Yet sometimes, you'd find yourself thinking about hugging and kissing Fred like you’d seen couples in your favorite movies did and you’d fall asleep with reddened cheeks and a boy with even redder hair in your mind.
But feelings couldn’t be controlled, nor easily hidden. Eva found out in your fourth year after hearing you mumble his name in your dreams. Fred Weasley was getting more handsome as years passed, and you found it hard to contain your feelings. You were crushing, hard.
Eva was...Eva about it. Happy, but nothing changed. She didn't tease like George did when he found out, nor did she act any differently towards Fred.
“Hey ____!” Fred had sat next to you, shaking the entire couch because he grew that tall during summer. “Got a new girl after me.” he looked at you, almost expectantly, as if you wouldn’t react the way you always reacted.
“That’s great Fred.” you smiled, gulping whatever lump that was forming in your throat and struggling to come out as vulgar words you wished to yell.
“Yeah,” Fred sighed, “It’s...great.”
Fred Weasley was a ladies man, and he wasn't afraid to show it. It was okay, because you were happy enough to be one of his closest, and that was enough. He often boasted about getting girls, and how successful his jokes were, and you always loved snapping back to him cockily, even more cockily than him. Playful banter was easy, comforting between them and when he turned away you would love to shyly entertain the idea of being one of those girl’s Fred talked about.
Fifth year, you had a sudden growth spurt. That was also the year where you discovered Cosmopolitan, Vogue and of course Witch Weekly. Hair no longer in a ponytail, legs shaved and smooth, short skirts with no nylons, you were a new person. After getting your period in third year, your spurt came late, but sudden. Way too sudden in the time of three months. It was hard to handle the changes occurring to your body. It was all too much that you had to become a lady and the fact that you didn’t have your mother to help was a pain you hid deep within.
It was as if whichever god above decided to squeeze your entire life into a summer and call it a day, because it was simply too busy. How ironic. No one saw your growth except old Nanny Gladys. Not Eva, nor her parents considering they went on a getaway and the Burke's, who had gone to Brazil.
But you were over that, you discovered the great telephone, and the great Hermione Granger, package deal with Ginny Weasley. You guys would talk on the phone for hours upon hours, Ginny obscuring your personality and Hermione altering your view on your parents. And Hermione was right, they were assholes. You didn't give a flying fuck about empty praises anymore.
You had become almost too tall for your older clothes, and your breasts were way too big to fit in the training bra you bought not even a month ago. Your hips, now wide and swaying as you walk became graceful, were decorated with long gem bracelets.
You cursed like a sailor that summer, ran around fields with family - your family being your dog, Jambo - bare feet. You stomped on flowers you used to pick as a little girl, stomping on those silly fairytale dreams you used to nurse, and never felt freer. For the first time ever you felt that maybe being empty could be more freeing than having false hope weighing you down.
Returning to Hogwarts was a big deal to students. Who changed, who glowed up after what happened last year - nothing, it was all childish drama.
Before your parents could even see your new self, your escapade to the Granger household was successful. The Y/L/N's didn't care, nor did they write. You knew it should’ve hurt, but frankly, you didn’t think having the pain in your chest was worth it. Hermione was awestruck, of course, after laying her sights on you for the first time since May and insisted on walking into the Entrance Hall, arm in arm with her and Ginny to show you off like some sort of revelation.
It was a revelation all right, at least to the boys, and some girls. It seemed no one saw you as a girl before. George oogled, and Lee was so shocked to find out that you were actually a girl with a pretty figure and an even prettier smile that he stopped clapping you on the back like he always did. Not a girl, you have become a woman. It was far too sudden, new uniforms and a whole new wardrobe had to be bought.
"____? You were a girl?" Fred joked, ruffling your hair like nothing changed between you. And that's when you realized, no slutty skirt, how much pushup your bra, or no matter how pretty your hair looked, Fred would always see you as ____, the girl with crooked front teeth and who once ate a worm in second year. Your teeth weren't crooked at all anymore - thanks to a few years of braces - and finally clear of uncomfortable metals but you felt as if Fred would always see the ghost of them on your pearly whites when you smiled.
He had this view of you that blinded him, caused him to treat you as he treated Ginny while he flirted and played footsie with other girls, including Eva.
That did not stop Eva from giving you false hope, and you took the bait, naive like always. Hope, that's what ruined it all. "You're beautiful now, of course you have a chance!" she said, rubbing your shoulder reassuringly, as if she had warmth to begin with.
It was all false, yet you still believed. You always had. Like a fool.
Ginny didn't like Eva, and maybe that's why you gravitated towards her. She was the first person who had ever met Eva that wasn't charmed by her kind smile and attractive words. Eva was...displeased. She grew up having the attention of everyone around, so when Ginny Weasley told her straight to her face that she wasn't shit, Eva seethed. The attention of Ginny changed nothing though, because Eva was the main character. Everyone - except Ginny, and secretly Hermione (though she would never say it) - loved her, they followed her around like puppies and praised her on her wonky wand work.
The upcoming Yule Ball brought great upswing to Hogwarts.
You were far too busy with her classes to take interest in the tournament - even though the dragon race was the gnarliest sight you had ever seen. Your goal was set, become a badass Auror and move out as soon as possible, so you didn't have to face your parents (except Holidays, yuck.)
But the Yule Ball was your chance. A chance with Fred Weasley.
You could ask to go as friends and maybe, just maybe a little hope and the night would end much more romantic than you had anticipated.
Plucking up courage was the hardest part, you practiced with your bathroom mirror so long that Ginny had to blast through the door and drag you out of her dormitory.
Fred Weasley agreed, why wouldn't he? You, his closest friend, asking to go as a group and drink all night while gossiping? It was a win win. At least that's what you told herself.
That was a lie, it wasn't a win win.
You gave it your all getting ready, dress silk, makeup and expensive shoes. You took a long shower, scrubbing and shaving yourself to a smooth gliding porcelain, only for it all to be washed down with reddened eyes and a boy with even redder hair.
Fred greeted you the same, danced the same, and you chatted the same; you were reminded again, for the second time, that you stood no chance.
Fred told you that he was going to get drinks, a quick trip to the booth and mumbled I'll be back in a second. He was not back in a second. Several minutes passed, and your worries caused your feet to follow after Fred's footsteps.
You ran, trying to find him in the empty corridors of Hogwarts, tears welling in your eyes because he wouldn't. He wasn't that cruel, life wasn't that cruel.
But it was, and in a distant empty classroom you saw Fred Weasley, on his knees and between Eva's legs, groaning and praising her like a starved man. Worshipping her like everyone else had, burying himself in her and completely forgetting the drink he’d bring back in just a second. He’d left you thirsty and alone in the Great Hall and left you to drink from a cup he hadn’t known to be forbidden. Yet Eva did.
Eva's perfect dainty hands tangled in his ginger hair, thighs clamping shut while her high pitched moans flooded your mind and echoed around your head. They were so loud that she couldn’t even hear the loud echoes of your footsteps and the woeful cries that left your lips as you ran. It wouldn’t be the first time she had ignored your pain for her own selfish reasons.
Your heart shattered, and suddenly you were six again, watching your parents praise Eva, hang her drawing on the fridge. A soft breeze tickling your bare toes, dangling from the small cushioned seat you sat on while you watched Eva braid Mrs Y/L/N’s hair. Emotionless, silent, not asking for anything, knowing that you won't receive in return. Eva's small hands carefully placed the flower crown on Mrs Y/L/N’s pool of hair, and she smiled, heart warming and hopeful. Suddenly you remembered the feel of your own hands tangling in between your locks as you stood on your tiptoes, trying to imitate your mothers braid on yourself in the mirror you couldn't reach. You pretended, only for a moment before it twisted into knots.
What a cruel joke, you thought as you watched Eva receive the world from Fred, from your parents, from your friends and from every damn person you had met.
You cried on a big set of stairs that night, your wails echoing as you asked whoever, whatever what you had done. What you had done to deserve such treatment from the people around you. It was rather cliche - and maybe a bit too dramatic. It was an uncomfortable seat of course, and your body, as well as your heart, ached. Pain, misery, false hope and enough hair spray to melt the ozone.
The princesses always cried on big sets of stairs, uncomfortable stone floors causing them to shiver while they hid away their beautifully animated faces in their perfect hands. This was different, there was no fairy godmother to fix your makeup and clone a gentlemanly Fred Weasley, a perfect prince. You knew, because you cried, and prayed and cried and prayed until your throat was sore. There was no fairy godmother, it was all a lie. There was no happy ending. There would be none.
No one came to find you that night either, and you had to drag yourself back to the Gryffindor common room, feet bare, mascara, blush - anything else you put on in hopes of being able to become like Eva even only for one night - practically nonexistent from the way your tears washed them away.
You didn't sleep that night, and your head was unusually clear, pounding, but clear. You laid awake, eyes blood-shot and stinging while your dress shuffled uncomfortably between your sheets. You were too tired to change, and your dress was far too pretty to be worn so short.
Ginny's words replayed over and over again. "They're not worth it." her voice was so clear, and true. Mr and Mrs Burke weren't worth it. Your parents weren't worth it. Fred Weasley wasn't worth it. Eva wasn't worth it. The midnight chirping of bugs invited themselves in from your open window, and blue moonlight streaks beaming down in lines from the tulle curtain flowed with breeze, it was calming.
You felt calm, for the first time in sixteen years. You felt calm.
Fred and Eva started dating that week. Everyone acted like they expected it, and you realized just how blind you had been. Eva Burke and Fred Weasley, golden couple of Hogwarts.
You watched them, emotionless, as they embraced with love and so much passion that you felt embarrassed. Embarrassed at how you’d blushed and squeal over Fred in front of Eva and George and anyone who had found out because now you knew. Now you knew that their amused smiles were probably pitying grimaces because they knew that you two were never meant to be. It was always Fred and Eva.
Fred was an amazing boyfriend, making sure Eva was taken care of, lovingly staring at her whenever and wherever, arm looped around her waist at all times; you realized they were truly not worth it.
"You disgust me."
You didn't mean the words to escape so carelessly, but when you said them, you realized you didn't want to take them back. The growing pit in your stomach felt weightless. "Excuse me?" said Fred, stopping his nibbling on Eva's neck, who was just as shocked. You scoffed, Eva already had enough purple bruises to parade around so why did Fred have the need to add more?
"You heard me right," George, Lee, Ron, Harry, Katie and whoever sitting in their circle stared at you, wide-eyed, Ginny and Hermione, however, were grinning devilishly. Kind ____, wouldn't hurt a fly, quiet at times and didn't know how to stand up for herself. It was shocking, but you were done pretending. You didn't want to be like that anymore, you wanted to say whatever came to mind and not worry about the consequences. "You guys disgust me, I know I should be supportive but you don't match, at all."
You turned to George. "And you, no you can't talk about Katie like that." George went pink. "You're disgusting for sleeping around carelessly and telling girls you'd write, stop giving people false hope. Grow up. You’re nearly an adult and you can’t even treat a girl right."
"And you Lee," Lee went quiet. "What gives you the right to make fun of me like that. I'll wear whatever the fuck I want, just because you don't have the courage to wear a headband. If you can talk about my breasts, I'll talk about your shrimp."
"Ron, you take advantage of Hermione then lead her on. Open your eyes, asshole."
"Harry, you're not the main character. You're not always going to be the center of attention, nor do you have the right to yell at your friends."
"Alicia, god you're so stupid. I'm sorry, you're great but such an airhead. No, you can't ride a Thestral if you can't see them, and stop eating quill ink they're bad for you."
You stood up, grinning proudly, heart loud in your chest you feared someone might hear. "Frankly, I don't wanna be friends anymore. I'm done with this façade, except you two, 'Gin, Hermione. The rest of you are just so fake." she gestured to them. "Boys," she nodded again. "Don't talk to me anymore, and Lee, give me back the money, think it's about time don't you think? I've been paying for you since third year."
And with that, you left. You left Three Broomsticks, grin wide and chest heaving. Hermione and Ginny ran behind, whooping and cheering you on as they laughed.
The news of your outburst spread fast like wildfire caught in wind. That week was bliss, you no longer had to watch Fred and Eva, nor did you have to act sweet to anyone. You didn't have to laugh along Lee's sexist jokes and look away to wince, it was pure bliss. You realized that the feeling of being free didn’t have to be momentary.
Pansy Parkinson was surprisingly a good friend, she didn't have the same fakeness to her, the one Eva had where her smile was too kind. She spoke her mind, though every Slytherin did, and you liked that. Ginny wasn't happy with your new found friends, but she couldn't separate you. You made your own decisions from now on. It was refreshing.
You told your new friends everything, eager to get it off your chest and breathe, and they listened. For the first time, someone listened. You didn't have to get good grades, nor did you have to act like a sweet angel.
You teared up the first time Pansy said; "It's not your fault,". You knew it wasn't your fault, but hearing someone else say it with such genuine eyes made you believe. Actually believe.
It started off with you watching from the sidelines as Draco and Blaise pranked, insulted and shamed whatever your old friend group did. It wasn't unusual for Draco to act this way, but he got especially irritated after hearing what you told them. Blaise, someone usually quiet, had stepped up and decided to somehow release the pent up anger he had for the Gryffindor students.
The year ended, and you had started to sneak in an insult or two towards Fred and Eva. It felt nice, like finally, step by step you were clearing your years of hidden jealousy. But, there was no one to tell you that this simply wasn't the right way.
That summer, you stayed at the Burrow. Ginny had invited you and you were quick to say yes; obviously a fact forgotten. Fred, George and whoever you had insulted last year stayed in the same house. You simply didn't want to go home, and if this meant seeing Fred Weasley then you had to endure it.
Molly Weasley was the sweetest person you could ever meet, and it was genuine. It felt genuine, you feared your teeth might rot if the woman got another word in. Molly greeted you as if you were her own daughter she hadn't seen in years. You felt valued, seen.
Until Eva was there, Fred invited her. You had to watch the only person you were able to love, introduce the only person he was able to love to his mother. It wasn't you. It would never be you.
And you realized, even after everything, Eva had once again found a way to be more loved than you.
The grin Molly broke out was nothing short of beautiful, and you couldn't help but smile as well. The smile wasn't directed towards you of course, and you sat on that small kitchen chair, celebrating a relationship that caused your ruin.
Eva didn't care that your friendship was over, nothing budged in her life. She still got the same attention, still received the same love from Fred. The same affection, the same attention and the same everything. Or so it seemed.
Though unlike Eva, Fred merely watched you with sad eyes.
You stayed clear of the couple and the rest. You hung out with Ginny and Hermione only, ignoring the dirty looks Ron and Harry gave you. The secret, whispered insults Eva threw your way. George didn't say anything, but he didn't object either. This was enough to show how he felt. At this point you really didn't care. Why would you, when they didn’t either?
You held your head high just like Ginny and Hermione told you to, and you spoke in a loud and clear tone whenever asked something. Eva didn't, she stuttered when you spoke to her directly. Her words scrambled against each other when she tried to voice her insults in louder statements than a whisper. For the first time, you felt relief. You felt intimidating, protected by the barriers you had built around yourself.
Longest day of summer hit, and it boiled. Tanning became a distant dream, you would bake in this weather, and you were thankful to the big AC box you had brought from home. You couldn't sleep that night, sweat beads falling down your forehead that was already covered in a thin sheen. You had decided to get a cold glass of water, not sure how you ended up face to face with Fred Weasley. His wand tip shone with blue light, and his freckles were much darker because of the sun. It seemed the sun decided to be cruel to Fred Weasley back and wash Fred over with it's deathly heat. He was sunburnt, this was an understatement. He was burnt.
You couldn't help but start laughing when you met, ignoring the proximity, ignoring the sleeping house, dead silent and a big leap from the lively Burrow, ignoring Fred's soft breaths he let out every other second. You couldn't live off on false hope anymore.
Suddenly it wasn't so funny anymore, and your face quickly fell. You took a big step back and inhaled, ready to ignore him like you had been doing for the past year. But Fred Weasley was a persistent man, and he gripped your arm and looked at you with determined, doe-like eyes. "Tell me what I did wrong." he said, adamant on fixing this, whatever this was. You both didn't know.
You stood silent.
"Please flower,"
"Don't call me that." you said, stern and gaze sharp. Fred didn't react, he kept on insisting.
"Please, tell me how to fix this. I can fix it," he pleaded, a plethora of empty promises fell out of his lips like nothing. He lied like it was nothing, he was oblivious to everything he and everyone around them had put you through. It was infuriating.
You didn't say anything. You knew he would not fix anything but maybe staying silent would give him the false hope that spinned mockingly in your head for the past eighteen years.
"I'm sorry, just please. I can fix this, I promise, don't be like that." empty tears fell down from his eyes. He looked empty, tired. They lacked the charm they usually shined with and you wondered if it was only you that caused such dullness. Eye bags prominent that you never noticed before. It all felt like a lie, a cruel joke.
Fred Weasley was simply a cruel joke. His presence could only be compared to a shot of whiskey, especially when you down it like how Hagrid nurses a Firewhiskey filled pint glass. You never know how it will hit you. But in the end, you'd always find yourself curled next to the toilet, crying your eyes out because your headache was simply too much.
He was sobbing now, hanging onto your waist like you would simply vanish and you let him. The grip he had on was like steel vice - almost concerning - but you didn't touch him, didn't say anything. You just let him be, like he did to you. Allowed him to hopelessly hang off you before you would eventually leave him alone, like he did to you. "Where did I go wrong? How could we end up like this? What went wrong?"
‘You’, but your voice couldn’t be found.
Questions were useless when the answer was already right in front of his eyes. You didn’t let a single tear fall, you wouldn't forgive yourself if you cried in front of him.
You blinked, and that night was over. Summer continued on like nothing happened, like it didn't leave you heart broken and in such shame yet again. You continued on ignoring Fred as he looked at you with sorrowful eyes. Looked at you more, with more than he did his own girlfriend.
You blinked and the school year started again with another terror looming around the corner. There was simply no need to keep up anymore, because school was easy. You attended classes, got good grades, a few scar here and there from Umbridge's torture chamber, a woman who stood at a whopping five foot three yet still teriffied an entire school.
You blinked and you had already become a proud member of Draco's insult the Gryffindor's club. You didn't even feel bad, being horrible to the people you hated for years felt like a breath of fresh air. You didn't go as far as physically hurting any of your old friends, but coming up with damaging insults was such fun. A lot more fun than sitting around with a fake smile.
You blinked, and you were already moving out from your childhood house. Mr and Mrs Y/L/N were unusually happy, this was a given. They would have a new empty room and make another office, like they didn't have enough already. You feared they would start getting rid of bathrooms once too into their work, and they would have to do their business in bushes or buckets. Scratch that, you didn't fear that, it would be fucking hilarious.
You blinked, and when had time passed too quickly? Where did all those empty childhood years had gone? You were already graduating, on your way to become an Auror. You had lost contact with all your old friends now, regretfully Ginny and Hermione too.
The war had hit too quickly, luckily you survived, so did your friends. Unluckily, it left you with a nasty scar right across your left brow. It looked sick, but the hit wasn't worth it. It hurt like a bitch. You could see, it was a close call but vision wasn't an issue. The trauma though, god did Bellatrix's breath smell bad.
When it was all over, you had seen Fred hugging his family tightly. It seemed the Weasley's all survived, and you gave them each tight lipped smiles while holding a bunched up rag to your head to stop the blood gushing out. This wasn't the reunion you wanted to have with Ginny, but hey, you take what you can get after a revolutionary Wizarding war you barely made out alive.
Before a franticly running Fred could reach you though, you apparated to your flat in Diagon Alley, ignoring the thrumming of your heart, and how you practiced in front of a mirror to congratulate their successful joke shop that morning.
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luci-in-trenchcoats · 3 years
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If I Fell For You (Part 12) - Not So Sweet Home
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Summary: Jensen is fed up with his parents ignoring Y/N all day and when he gets a moment alone, blows up on them like never before. The reader sees how upset Jensen is over what’s happening and does her best to defend him while still trying to salvage a relationship with them...
Masterlist
Pairing: Jensen x nanny!reader
Word Count: 6,200ish
Warnings: language, major family angst, mention of a dead parent
A/N: Eek! If you like angst this part is for you! Please enjoy and let me know what you think!
________
It was late, the kids asleep in the guest bedroom, Jensen’s siblings and their families gone home for the evening aside from his brother. He made some half ass excuse about wanting to hang out with Jensen more but you knew he could sense what you did. Jensen was getting close to popping after a whole day of politeness on his part and his parents ignoring you on theirs.
Jensen was bouncing his knee like crazy as he sipped on his beer around a gas fire pit, suddenly stopping when you shifted in your seat.
“Maybe you ought to cool it with the alcohol tonight,” said his dad. Jensen set his empty bottle down on the grass and breathed deeply through his nose. “Your legs been-”
“Y/N, would you get me another beer please?” asked Jensen. You took the opportunity to get out of there, surprised when the back door opened quickly after you, his brother closing it behind him.
“I don’t think your parents like me very much,” you said, going to the fridge and pulling out a drink. 
“I know,” he said, glancing out the dark window. “Jensen asked me to make sure you don’t come back out there.”
“He’s gonna go off on them.”
“Yeah, that’s what I’m guessing,” he said with a sigh. “I have a feeling this isn’t going to go well. You guys can crash at my place if you want. We don’t have a guest room but we have an air mattress we can put in the family room.”
“You think it’ll be that bad?”
“Yeah,” he said quietly.
“Then why are we in here talking about this when we should be out there making sure he doesn’t say something he regrets in the morning.”
“You might hear things you can’t unhear,” he said. 
“Right now my concern isn’t if my feelings get hurt. He’s really upset and I need him to be okay.”
“You know that’s why the rest of us like you, don’t you? You care about him, the kids. You’re in love with him.”
“Yes I am,” you said as he nodded.
“You call me if either of you ever need anything,” he said, going back to the door. You nodded and took a deep breath, following him outside and already hearing raised voices.
“She’s half your age, Jensen,” said his mom. “She was your nanny. Sweetie you have to know what’s going on here.”
“You’re getting played,” said his father, catching you walking out with Josh.
“She is not half my age. She’s thirty fucking years old! She’s a goddamn adult and been through more shit then both of you put together! She’s not after fucking money,” snapped Jensen who was already out of his seat.
“You’re engaged to the girl after five months!” said his father. “It took you years to propose the first time around!”
“Because I was a nervous kid that was away working constantly. I didn’t want to make Dee stay if it was gonna make her unhappy. I’m not afraid of how I feel anymore because I feel the same about her as I do Dee and I’m not wasting my time so I can stick to your socially acceptable schedule,” said Jensen. “I love her and she’s gonna be part of this family whether you like it or not. Deal with it.”
“You need a prenup,” said his dad.
“No I don’t!”
“Yes you do! You’ve known the girl for not even six months!”
“She’s not up to anything!” shouted Jensen.
“Son-”
“Have you ever lost your wife? Have you ever been in the car and almost die yourself while you watch her breathe for the last time? Where she’s hurt and you can’t do a thing to fix it? Have you ever had to tell your children their mother is dead and she’s not coming back? You have no idea, no idea, what that does to you, how much it hurts and how much it hurts when you’re still so fucked up and your parents start making comments behind closed doors about you and you have to pretend you’re better when you’re really not. When you don’t even care about yourself anymore, when you pretend for everyone’s sake so they stop treating you like a child, when you don’t know how to tell your kids it’s okay because it’s not. It’s not. Until you go through that, until you know how bad it hurts, don’t assume a damn thing about her. She’s my best friend and she makes me feel like my old self again. I laugh and smile and have fun and when I get scared or feel guilty or freak out she makes me feel better. I don’t give a fuck how old she is or what her job was. She’s kind and good and she deserves better than you two. Danneel’s parents like her. Jared’s parents like her. Her old foster dad’s family likes her. Our family likes her except for you two. Get your heads out of your asses or you can not even bother letting me know you exist anymore. I’m done with things hurting the women I care about. I couldn’t stop what happened to Dee but I can sure as hell keep Y/N away from the two of you,” said Jensen. He huffed and walked off, Josh running off after him. 
“Well congratulations. You got your hooks in him deep, don’t you,” said his father. You rolled your eyes and his mother scoffed.
“You can take care of someone without treating them like a child you know. He’s an incredibly strong person. If you don’t like me fine. But don’t call him stupid or easily manipulated or imply that it’s wrong to know you love someone after only a certain amount of time. I love your son.”
“You love his money,” said his mom.
“I do just fine on my own,” you said, narrowing your eyes. “He’s staying at Josh’s house tonight. We’ll pick up the kids in the morning.”
“He’s overreacting. He’ll be fine in the morning,” said his dad. You crossed your arms and leaned your head back. “He’ll be fine.”
“You two don’t know a thing about me and you assume I want money because of my age and my former career. Don’t assume your son will be fine and get over it.”
“We’ve known him a lot longer than you have. He’ll get over it after a night’s rest.”
“You may have known him longer and I’m sure in some regards you do know him better but not the ones that matter. If you did, you would have seen how much he would have loved for the two of you to like me. I would have taken some respect and been happy because trust me, I get how this looks to everyone else. I understand you have fears and I’m not mad you have them. I’m mad you assume those are facts when all they are is a story you made up in your head you don’t want to change. He’s right, I’m not going anywhere. The difference between him and me though is that I’ll stay out here all damn night with the two of you until you get it through your heads that I’m not here to fuck him over. I love him. I don’t have family, not really. Things have always been screwed up for me pretty much until I met him and he didn’t have to say it for me to know that he was hoping he could share the two of you with me. Maybe I was hoping for that too. But right now I’ll take some goddamn respect and an apology to your son to start and we can go from there.”
“You’re gonna curse at us and expect an apology?” said his mom. “We know you took him when he was at his low and tricked him into trusting you so you could get exactly what you wanted.”
“You know what I want? What I’ve always wanted and somehow always seems to get ripped away? A family. A stupid fucking family. Being a nanny? That let me feel like part of the family. I could pretend I was like all of those people I worked for. Nice and normal and like people gave a shit. Some kindness and a family is all I’ve ever wanted. You two...you wouldn’t have survived a day in my childhood. In my adulthood with the shitty ex boyfriend and the crappy friends and I picked myself over all of them because my mom told me to stand up for myself. Even when she couldn’t be there and I wanted her to. So I stand up for myself and now I stand up for him and those three kids to anyone and I mean anyone, that hurts them. He’s my family and those kids are my family. I don’t know what you think I’m gonna do but I guarantee the only thing I will do is tell you two where to shove it and to leave him the hell alone.”
“Why would we believe anything you say? At all?” his dad asked. “It’s probably the same sad story you told him to get him on the line. I don’t buy it.”
“I have a million dollar book deal. I’ve worked rent free for a lot of rich people since I was eighteen years old. Do I sound like someone who needs his money?” you said. You put your hands on your hips and shook your head. “What is it? You want me to sign a prenup? I would but he doesn’t want one. He trusts me and for a guy that lost his wife and had to work through falling in love with another person, I respect that. He knows what he wants and he’s not wasting time. This is scary for him. It’s scary for me. But when Dee’s parents gave me open arms and kindness and their blessing, the last people I ever expected to disapprove were you two. If you’re going to stand there and keeping calling me a liar, I’m going to find your sons and I’m going take care of Jensen instead of wasting my time here.”
“We don’t disapprove of him moving on and marrying again,” said his mom as you turned to walk away.
“Could have fooled me,” you said. 
“He’s going too fast and he doesn’t know you either, not well enough to make a decision like that,” said his dad. You turned around and smiled.
“He knows my favorite color. He knows what my favorite flavor of ice cream is. He knows why I have nightmares and he knows how to make me forget them in the first place. I’m sorry we aren’t doing things on your schedule but it’s his life. He can do whatever the fuck he wants with it, whether that’s me or somebody else. For the record, he knows me just fine. Oh and if this is how you plan on speaking to him again in the morning, I’ll pick up the kids myself.”
“We’re looking out for his best interest,” said his dad.
“No, you think you’re looking at his wallet for him. See money? People think that’s important and it is but best interest? It ain’t that shit,” you said as you started to leave.
“Well what do you assume his best interest is then?” said his mom. 
“Treating him like an adult. He is smart and strong and the most emotionally healthy man I’ve ever met which considering all the fucked up shit he’s been through and felt the past year is really saying something. He’s your child but he’s not a child. He found someone he loves and all he wanted to do was share me with you. This was his worst nightmare and I couldn’t stop it. So if you’re not gonna even try with me, then I’m gonna protect him from you.”
“He doesn’t need protecting from us,” he said.
“You call him stupid and that he can’t take care of himself, that he can be fooled and that the person he thinks is his best friend really only wants him for his money. He knows none of those things are true but it’s what you said to him when you said that about me. For a man who went through what he did, it wasn’t mean. It was cruel. I’m gonna go fix what I can of your relationship with him because despite all that, I know you guys love each other and I’m not letting that get fucked up because you think whatever the hell you think about me.”
You stormed off around the house and found Josh’s truck still there but neither man in sight. You looked around and heard a sniffle, your head going up to the roof. You saw the lattice work on the side and climbed up, peeking your head up to spot the two of them sat on the roof.
“Hey,” you said quietly. Jensen wouldn’t look at you, Josh rubbing his back. 
“Careful,” he said as you climbed up and slowly walked over. You took a seat on your bottom, spotting the window behind them. “That was my room. Jensen used to sneak out this way. I was always too nervous of getting caught to try myself. You landed the bad boy of the family.”
“Oh yeah, such a bad boy,” you said. You scooted closer on your butt to him, Jensen resting his head on his knees. “Hey. Before you even think about it don’t say you’re sorry.”
“I know,” he said. He took a deep breath but looked up, looking fairly normal aside from a slightly pink nose. “I wasn’t expecting that.”
“Nobody was,” said Josh. “I’ll give you guys a minute. I’ll be in my car when you’re ready.”
“You should go home,” said Jensen. “Staying in a different house won’t change anything.”
“That was kinda fucked up what they said.” Jensen raised an eyebrow and he shrugged. “I don’t always agree with them. If you guys want to stay, that’s your choice but I’m not going home without telling them what a mistake they’re making.”
“You don’t have to-”
“You’re my little brother and I like her. Even if I didn’t, they’re being assholes and she doesn’t deserve that. You don’t. Alright?”
Jensen nodded and Josh walked off to the lattice and climbed down while you scooted next to Jensen. 
“You thought your siblings weren’t gonna like me,” you said.
“He’s a good person. He’s never told off our parents before so...I don’t know if I’m happy about that or not.”
“He’s a good big brother,” you said, wrapping your arms around him. “I don’t love you for your family though. I don’t care if your parents don’t like me. I’ll deal with it.”
“I wish you didn’t have to,” he said.
“I still like your dad so much better than mine,” you said.
“Yours is a monster to be fair.”
“Yeah, he is. Yours love you and I don’t agree with them but in their minds, they’re protecting you and I don’t have a problem with anyone trying to do that.”
“How are you so fucking kind to them after they basically said you’re with their dumbass son because of money?”
“Like you said, I know monsters. I know toxic and bad. They aren’t it. They raised you and I really, really like you. Good people can be stupid and still be good. In the morning we’ll try again.”
“What if I can’t get them to change their minds?” he said quietly. 
“Jensen,” you said, moving to squat down in front of him. You grabbed his cheeks and he stared at you. “You don’t have to pick anybody over anybody. Maybe I won’t be close with them but that’s okay. It’s so okay. We’ll respect each other or just won’t talk to each other and we’ll figure it out but we don’t have to do it all tonight.”
“I think what bothers me the most is they’ve already made up their minds about you based on your age when they don’t even realize who you are. They don’t see that this is the kind of person you are, kind and supportive and I heard you not taking their bullshit. You’re a stronger person than I am and I wish they could see that the reason I’m not freaking out over this is cause I know you’re my partner and you got my back like I got yours. I’m just having a hard time understanding why they won’t even listen to us.”
“I don’t know,” you said, eyes darting to the window when you caught some movement inside. You narrowed them and glanced down, spotting the crack between the windowsill and frame. “I’m a little cool. I’m gonna get my sweatshirt if that’s okay.”
“Careful climbing in,” he said, turning on his bottom and pushing the window up. You kissed his cheek and climbed inside, the room empty as far as you could tell. You stepped out to the hall and into his old room, getting your hoodie, his old hoodie. You pulled it on but went downstairs, catching his parents in the kitchen with Josh.
“Josh may I speak to your parents in private,” you said.
“Yeah. I’m done here. I’ll be over for brunch, okay?” he said. He walked past you and caught your arm. “Call me if you need me back.” You nodded and he kissed your temple before he went out. 
“Were you eavesdropping on us?” you asked, crossing your arms.
“We went to tell him to get off the roof. We could see him from the backyard up there,” said his mom, putting her back to you as she mixed up something in a mug. “But we heard the three of you talking and then the two of you. We didn’t mean-”
“We are all on the same side. His side. We should get along. It shouldn’t be this difficult and I don’t appreciate private conversations being listened in on. But I hope you understand that you hurt your son. I know you didn’t mean to and it’s the last thing you’d ever want to do to him. But you did. So please try to help me fix this. This isn’t easy for me to accept that you don’t like me either but you’re gonna respect me. If we can respect each other, then he’s not going to worry as much at least. Please promise that we can agree to that,” you said. His parents looked at each other and you sighed. “You have to be kidding me. What do you want me to do? Go away? I can’t do that. I won’t do that.”
“That’s not...Jensen called your father a monster up there,” he said. 
“I thought it was a sob story according to you ten minutes ago.”
“You said you don’t have parents. He said your father is alive.”
“What’s your point, Mr. Ackles,” you said. “Please enlighten me.”
“It doesn’t make much sense to tell different stories,” he said. 
“You can’t even give me the benefit of the doubt that I love your son. Why the fuck would I tell you things only he knows, things so few people know about. Why would I trust you with the worst parts of my life when you don’t accept the best ones. For your information, my birth mother is dead. My adoptive mother is dead. I wish my son of a bitch father was dead. The only glimmer of a parent I have maybe, maybe was my foster father. That was until last weekend. I met some parents. I met Dee’s. I met Jared’s. I got the same message from all of them. Let us know if you ever need anything. Oh the way he looks at you. You must be pretty special. Anything at all, you give us a call. People that don’t even have an obligation to look in my direction treated me like I was their kid. So maybe he and I both got our hopes up with you two and that was on us. If you want to pick apart what I’ve said and call me a liar…” you said, putting your hands on your hips. Your shut your eyes and breathed deeply, turning around. “I don’t care if you have to pretend to respect me. Just do it for his sake and the kids sakes, alright?”
A tissue appeared over your shoulder and you took it, blowing your nose and stepping away. 
“When did your mother’s pass?” you heard behind you. You threw your head back and took a deep breath.
“When I was born and when I was sixteen,” you said, turning around and swallowing. “Why does that matter?”
“When were you adopted?” he asked.
“Why do you care?”
“Please.”
“I was eight,” you said.
“So you only had your mother for eight years then,” he said. 
“Yeah. She got sick when I was fourteen. I stayed with her boyfriend until I moved out for my first nanny job at eighteen. It was all very sad and angsty,” you said.
“Who made the first move?” 
“I’m done with this interrogation,” you said. You started to leave but he stepped in front of you. “What do you want from me?”
“I just want to know who made the first move, you or Jensen.”
“I don’t…” you trailed off. “We had a fight. I told him I didn’t want him to be my friend anymore, he was just my boss and that was it. We couldn’t hang out at night and stuff anymore.”
“Why?”
“I didn’t want him to hurt me,” you said quietly. “I didn’t fit with his life. I’m not a pretty actress. I’m not smart. I’m the younger nanny and that’s all I was gonna be until I became an older nanny and that was supposed to be my life. I didn’t ask for…”
“For what?” asked his mother, carrying over her mug and setting it down on the end table.
“I didn’t ask for him to love me. But he did and I don’t know why but I trusted him not to hurt me. It’s not fairytales and roses all day every day but I like having a best friend and I never would have submitted those books to a publisher without him encouraging me and I need him to feel better. He can’t catch a break lately and I hate seeing him upset. It makes me sick to my stomach and I really, really need him to be okay so please stop doing this. Just stop. Please. I don’t care if we have to pretend the rest of our lives but please, I can’t keep seeing him take hit after hit anymore and not being able to stop it.”
You weren’t expecting the hug from his father or to bury your face in his chest for a brief moment. His mom guided you to sit on the couch, pulling a blanket around you. She handed you the mug and you saw it was hot chocolate, your eyes darting back and forth between them.
“This isn’t about to be like a lifetime movie where you murder me, right?” you said. 
“No,” said his mom as she sat next to you. “We hurt you quite deeply today, didn’t we.”
You stared at the mug, holding it in your hands. 
“You were looking forward to meeting us,” said his dad as he sat down on your other side.
“It doesn’t matter. All I care about is him.”
“I don’t think he’d be very happy with you laying down for a semblance of normalcy for him,” he said.
“Just spit out whatever the fuck you want,” you said. You gripped the mug and shut your eyes.
“I’d like you to stop swearing please,” he said. “In exchange, maybe we can have a second chance.”
“Second chance at what?” you said dryly.
“At meeting our son’s fiance.” You lifted your head and stared at him, catching a bashful look you saw in Jensen every so often. “We understand, as well as we can, he was hurt after Danneel. We can’t fix those problems like when he would scrape his knees. We knew he was in a vulnerable position and things between the two of you seemed so fast for how in pain he was. We thought of the worst of you before knowing you and that wasn’t right of us. We were trying to protect him. But like you said, we all try to do that. So if you’ll let us, give us a second chance.”
“For him, I will give you both a second chance,” you said. “I’m sorry to have to be the one to tell you this but this sort of thing isn’t going to go away just like that, for him or for me.”
“Is there anything…” said his mom as you shook your head. “We are sorry for before. Truly.”
“I know. Trust is difficult for me on a normal day. You guys kinda tore through the safety nets I thought I had with you. I need to build them up again is all.”
“That was you that said that, people have safety nets,” she said. You raised and eyebrow and she sighed. “Jensen, months back, he told us his therapist told him that, put things in perspective.”
“I guess couple’s are kinda each other’s therapists,” you said. “Sometimes they just need to vent to each other too.”
“Before you said...has he ever been to one?” asked his dad.
“Last weekend was...intense. I went to one as a child and he talked to him for a little while, helped him put things in perspective,” you said.
“Intense? Did you fight?” she asked.
“He and JJ got stung by a scorpion. It was a little serious. We went out the next night and I made a comment and he took it a different way and he got upset thinking I thought of myself as being less in his eyes than Dee was. I know it’s not true, it’s just different. He’s been having a really great week aside from today.”
You took a sip of the hot chocolate and went back for more, drinking half the mug down. 
“We screwed up,” said his dad with a sigh, sitting back against the couch. 
“Yeah but he’ll forgive you,” you said. “This is really good Mrs. Ackles.”
“Thank you sweetie and call me Donna. I made it for Jensen. He’s always liked it when he was living here and having a bad day.”
“Why do you think he’ll forgive us?” asked his dad as Donna got up.
“Because he’s Jensen. He’s not an angry man. Angry in moments but he doesn’t hold onto anger. I wouldn’t expect anything less from him. So I know he’ll forgive you. When I’m not sure of but it won’t be forever.”
“Have you two ever fought badly?” he asked.
“We’ve had a few fights. Mostly small and when we’re both tired or hungry. We had a big one a few weeks ago when he got home but we talked about why it happened and how to make sure it doesn’t again,” you said. Donna carried over a kettle and poured more hot chocolate in your mug. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome. Don't ask about fights Alan. It’s not our business. We should let them tell us what they want,” she said as she walked back to the kitchen.
“They probably should have had a big fight at least once to know if they can work through those things and it sounds like they have,” he said when he turned to you. “I know you’re probably love struck but marriage? That’s a lifetime of putting in the work.”
“Alan if I didn’t care about putting in the work I wouldn’t be down here right now. I know I don’t know everything I’m signing up for and no one really does but I know him and the kids and that’s worth the parts I have to work at.”
“You sound older than you look.”
“Age doesn’t always equal life experience,” you said.
“I suppose not,” he said. He stood and took a deep breath. “I do apologize for thinking the worst of you and not giving you a fair chance upfront.”
“Thank you,” you said. “I’m going to bring this up and check on him.”
“Can I ask one last thing?” asked his dad. You nodded and he looked over to Donna who gave him a short nod. “Josh said you really love him.”
“I do.”
“Do you think he loves you the same way?”
“I know he does,” you said.
“How are you so sure?”
“How are you so sure your wife loves you?” you said. “Goodnight Alan.”
“Goodnight,” he said, his mom catching up with you in the foyer where the stairs were. You gave her a tired smile and she nodded.
“If I told you something, would you keep it a secret from Jensen?” she asked.
“No,” you said with a smile. 
“I had to try,” she said. “We’re not like this by nature. Something happened he doesn’t know about when he was recovering that put us off to you. A woman. A young woman at his physical therapy.”
“What happened?” you asked quietly. She took a seat on a step and you sat beside her. “If someone tried to take advantage of him, you should have told me and him. He thinks you guys have gone nuts, no offense.”
“You’ll find with time you’d rather have your child safe and upset at you than the other way around,” she said. 
“What happened?”
“We moved down to the house for a few months to help Jensen. He went to physical therapy. A very good place. A family friend works there and got him in and he regained a lot of strength in his leg quickly because of it. There were nurses that often helped and he worked with a few regularly and they develop a relationship and all that. It’s good for morale and healing we were told. One of these girls was about your age and our family friend overheard her gossiping to a friend on the phone during a lunch break.”
“Gossiping about…” you said. “Jensen?”
“They saw an opportunity to manipulate him. He is smart, smarter than the both of us together, but he was going through the motions that first month. She made him smile a bit. She flirted with him. Our friend told us what she’d said and we realized, he could be hurt again. Taken advantage of for what he has, what he can offer. His sudden shift in mood this year, introducing you as a fiance, made us think we’d failed to protect him this time.”
“Why not tell him that?” you asked.
“And tell him he was being manipulated back then? He’s so adamant that it can’t happen to him but we know different.”
“I think you should tell him, Donna. It makes your reaction today seem not so…” you said, her head shaking.
“Ma,” you both heard. You looked over your shoulders, Jensen sat against the wall at the top of the landing. “Mom. Jerry told me why I got a new nurse when it happened. She was nice, or was pretending to be, I don’t know. But I didn’t like her. I never got manipulated and I was never going to.”
“How long-” you said, Jensen rubbing the back of his neck. “You heard everything.”
“Yup,” he said, popping his p, his dad coming over to the bottom of the stairs and staring up. “I don’t want to talk to either of you right now. Y/N, I’d like to go to bed, please.”
“Accept their apology Jensen. You can hash out the rest of this in the morning but accept that they know they were in the wrong,” you said. 
“Why should I?” he asked, cocking his head.
“We both got hurt out of their love for you. They are not monsters and I know the difference,” you said. “You know too.”
“Will you two ever look at me the same again,” said Jensen, staring at the landing. 
“Honey it was a fight. It’ll be alright,” said his mom, his head shaking.
“Ever since I woke up in the hospital, you two look at me like I’m a kid. Like I’m weak and defenseless. But I’m not. I’m stronger than I’ve ever been and this whole day could have been avoided if you treated me like your adult son, not the kid who fell off his bike and cries over a cut. I needed you two to take over, I did, I honestly did after the accident. I couldn’t take care of myself let alone the kids. But you haven’t stopped thinking I can take care of me again. I can. I do. I know I’m your kid but let me be an adult again. Trust me. Please.”
“Come here,” you said, holding out your hand. He slid down the steps and you stood up and aside, letting him get a hug from his mom and then dad. 
“We’re sorry,” said his dad.
“I know,” said Jensen quietly. “Never do something like that again. Ever.”
“We won’t,” he said. You leaned against the wall and sipped on the hot chocolate, Jensen’s nose twitching.
“That’s my cocoa,” he said, turning his head up at you.
“I just Jerry Springer’ed ya’ll. I get the cocoa. Get your own,” you said. He smiled and you gave it right back, his parents pulling off and bringing him to his feet. 
“Come here,” said his dad as his mom dragged him off towards the kitchen with the promise of hot chocolate. You stepped down until you were about his height and took a drink, licking your lips when you finished. “How do you just let that go? You were so angry before.”
“I’ve been to therapy. I have good diffusing skills,” you said. 
“Is that a joke?”
“Not really,” you said with a smile. “You made a mistake because you love him. I’m gonna make mistakes because I love him. So when I screw up, now you owe me one, deal?”
“I know it’s getting late but would you be willing to stay up a while longer, maybe find out that favorite color?” he asked. You smiled and nodded, stepping down.
“Depends on the day,” said Jensen, stepping out with a mug of his own.
“He’s right,” you said. “You okay to stay up a bit?”
He nodded and walked back to the family room, taking your hand. 
“Better?” you whispered to him.
“Yeah. Not all the way but definitely better honey.”
It was warm when you woke up the next morning. You peeled open an eye and caught Jensen laying awake, staring at his ceiling. You kicked off the blankets and he reached an arm out, pulling you to lay on his chest.
“It’s hot in here,” you mumbled, eyes shutting again.
“There’s a box covering the vent,” he said, dancing his fingers lazily over your bare arm. “It’s almost noon.”
“Seriously?” you said into his chest, nuzzling against his soft skin.
“Yeah. Sounds like they’re out back with the kids,” he said. You nodded and felt him move his fingers all over you, soft and light, absentmindedly tracing patterns every so often.
“Still upset?” you asked, his head nodding. “They’re human. They fuck up.”
“Are you angry?”
“I was. Not anymore. I kinda like ‘em actually.”
“Why would you give them a second chance?” he asked. 
“When I got adopted I didn’t like, instantly love my mom. I was scared of her at first. I don’t know, I get that you can not like someone at first and then love them unconditionally, you know? It’s weird but your opinions can change once you get to know someone.”
“I don’t do a very good job of protecting you from things,” he said, tilting his head, moving a few hairs behind your ear. You looked up at him, his fingers playing in your hair behind you. 
“Honey you went off on your parents last night. I bet you’ve never done that to them. You were trying to protect me and you did. No one has ever protected me the way you do,” you said. “Today is a new day and I’d like to get to know my new family some more.”
“Okay,” he said softly. “I’ll follow your lead.”
_______
A/N: Read Part 13 here!
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This Boy (George Harrison x Female!Reader)
A/N: Hey y'all! welcome to my first oneshot! a lot of my stories are very plot-driven and they end up becoming these long chapter fics but I'm gonna see if I can make a handful of oneshots in the next little bit to kind of give yous something to read while waiting for the longer fics to finish up. this is my first one, and it's for Georgie!
Summary: It's date night, and you're more than ready to meet your mystery date; George, however, is not.
WARNINGS: Swearing is in almost all my fics, so this one isn't safe either probably, hints of suggestive behaviour, slow burn, friends to lovers, lack of self-editing probably, etc. *This fic is also LONG AF so I would advise y'all to start reading this when you have nothing else to do*
I'll rate this one as a T. Enjoy, folks!
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George checked the clock on the wall again and sighed gently.
You were still getting ready.
As much as it disappointed him, George agreed-- well, more like offered-- to drive you to your blind date one of your girlfriends set you up on.
It's not that he wasn't excited or proud of you for getting yourself out there. He knew you'd been meaning to do that since graduating school.
He was just frustrated at the fact that whichever lucky man was going on a date with you that night wasn't him.
When he found out about the date, he immediately vocalized his distrust for the mystery person, despite knowing absolutely zero about him. You seemed heartbroken at that, and to make it up to you, he offered to drive you to the date.
So there he was, sitting on the sofa in the living area of your flat, waiting for you to finish getting ready.
George had taken you to school dances in the past, and while your mother let you wear makeup to them, it never took you this long to apply it.
You were definitely dressing to impress tonight.
"Lucky man," he just mumbled under his breath at the thought of that boy.
You and George had been friends since you were children, and he deemed you his Best Friend Forever only an hour into your first playtime.
You spent your days as children riding your bikes to the park to play, and helping each other with homework at each other's houses every night.
However, that sort of platonic "buddy-buddy" dynamic changed when the both of you hit puberty.
It wasn't until a boy at George's school questioned him if you were his girlfriend, that George realized he had a crush on you. Some of his friends had girl friends, and they were always teased about whether or not they were dating, but this was the first time anyone had put you and George together.
After this discovery, (which he would endlessly thank the young boy who opened his eyes to the truth in the first place) George began to notice lots of little things about you that he hadn't before.
You would run your fingers through the hair on the back of his head during hugs, you never took your eyes away from him when he was speaking; there hadn't been one time to name that you'd ever made him upset or angry, but more or less excited, and free, and joyous.
And not to mention, the way you called him "Georgie" made his heart pound so loud and hard in his chest that he might as well have just completed a marathon...
He was in love with everything only when you were around.
Actually, as awkward as George thinks it is, Paul helped him realize he was physically attracted to you.
The boys were on their way to George's after school, a few years after George realized he had a little crush on you, and the teenagers both caught sight of you watering the front garden of your home at the request of your mother.
George stopped in his tracks when he saw you, his mouth hanging open as he watched you do your thing. After being enrolled in his boy's school, you never had much time to see one another, as much as it hurt him; so he cherished every moment he could see you.
"If her ma catches you out the window starin' at her daughter's arse the way you're doin' right now Harrison, they'll rip your tongue right out."
George's face went bright red, and he turned to look at Paul in horror, slapping him on the arm for saying such a thing. "I wasn't staring at her like that!" But he couldn't help but steal a glance at your behind since it was now the topic of discussion, though he really didn't want it to be.
Paul knew George felt compelled to say something to you, and he smirked as George awkwardly raised his hand to wave as he called to you from the other side of the street.
"H-hey, Y/n!"
You turned around, and grinned at who you'd seen.
"Hey Georgie! Hi Paulie!" You twiddled your fingers at them, and George's stomach churned in jealousy at the fact you had a nickname for Paul, as well.
"Your garden looks beautiful, Ms. Y/l/n!"
Paul stole George's line. He fucking stole his line!
"A-and you look just as lovely as ever!" George added to one-up his friend.
You put a hand to your heart. "You boys make my heart sing." George took pride in your words despite them partially being for Paul as well.
"We need to see each other more, yeah?" George never expected his question to really get him anywhere, but he was wrong.
"Why not tonight? I don't have any homework and my parents are leaving town 'round five for the weekend to visit my auntie and uncle."
George's answer came quick, and effortlessly. "I'll be 'round for six. Sound good?"
"Perfect! I'll see you tonight then." You waved to the boys again, and then went back to watering the garden after bidding farewell.
The rest of the walk home was just Paul making fun of how lovestruck George was with you, and by the time they got to his house, just down the road from yours, Paul looked over at his buddy and smiled.
"No wonder you value your time with your darlin' over there so much, Magpie. Looks like she would definitely be a fine birdie in bed."
George looked over at Paul, eyes wide, and his voice broke. "... What?!" The thought of going to bed with you never crossed his mind-- well, until that moment.
"Hey, her folks'll be gone by the time you go over! You can make your move then! It's perfect!" Paul's words laced with excitement made George feel panicked, and the boy shook his head worriedly after a moment. "M-maybe it's not the best idea to go tonight..."
"Why not? All you ever wanna do is be alone with her!" Paul set a hand on the other boy's shoulder when he didn't answer. "What's up, George?"
"Paul, I've never even kissed her. She doesn't even know I like her like that! What if she likes someone else?! What do I even do?!" Paul was the biggest heartbreaker George knew. He'd had like... ten girlfriends since they met, and he kissed a whole three of them. They didn't last long, much like the fate of other young relationships, but George took Paul's advice as serious guidance; he needed to in a time like this.
"You just need to be calm. Take some deep breaths. You'll know what to do when the time comes. I know you will."
That night, George had many opportunities to dive in for a kiss, or mention his feelings for you; some of those opportunities he even believed you encouraged, but he didn't budge out of utter fear of rejection. George knew for a fact that Paul was going to facepalm when he asks him for details on the visit to your place.
Instead, the night only consisted of talking, and the only contact you made were a couple of hugs and a kiss on the cheek (which left George a stumbling mess again), though you did agree to spend more time together, which is how your friendship lasted so long.
He was so close to having you, and because he was too scared to make the move Paul (and maybe you) were encouraging him to make so long ago, you slipped through his fingers; and since, the thought of not being able to have you that way never left his mind.
Especially not when you were now a gorgeous young lady, blindly torturing poor George, who beat himself up every day because he lost his chance.
You were like a piece of artwork to George. You could be loved, admired, and looked at by him, but he could never hold you or touch you.
And George hated that.
George wanted you to be his girl.
And you were his girl-- well, in a twisted way. You were always with him, smiling and laughing about nothing and everything, holding onto each other in your darkest nights and guiding one another through personal struggles...
But when other boys started to want you too, George wanted to make it a point to keep the majority of them away.
Some didn't heed George's threats and went on to pursue you anyways, only to be turned down on your front steps by yourself. George never understood why you never reciprocated anybody's feelings, but it's not like he was verbally complaining.
And that's what lead up to tonight. George had wanted you for so long, and the sudden knowledge of a blind date had him in shock, especially since this was your very first time giving in and agreeing to go.
It killed him to know some rando was going to appear out of thin air to whisk you away, whisper sweet nothings in your ear and eventually put his hands on you, thinking his love for you is stronger than any other despite knowing absolutely nothing about how you should be loved, and treated...
But George hid his fury from you because you were excited about this date.
And he would do anything for you.
George's rage-inducing, mind-racing thoughts were interrupted by the sound of your bedroom door clicking shut from behind him. He turned his head, heart in his throat, and you stepped into the room.
You wore a lovely high-waisted navy dress, and a pair of black flats. Your hair was half down, the rest coming together at the back of your head by a matching clip-on bow.
As expected, your makeup was quite noticeable. The burgundy colour of your lips and dark brown eyeshadow had George's head spinning, and he couldn't resist ogling at the way that dress fit you so well...
"So… How do I look? Like, if we were about to go on a date..."
A date? Us? We?!
George's palms began to sweat, and his heart did somersaults. If only.
It was only then that he realized his mouth was hanging slightly ajar, and after snapping it shut, he swallowed in embarrassment, not daring to look anywhere but your eyes again in fear of falling victim to your appearance again.
Imagine not being able to trust your eyes?
"... What would you think?"
George squeaked, his lips moving hesitantly though he didn't make a sound. His face was surely an embarrassing shade of red, and the longer he waited into answer, the more anticipated you looked for a response.
George rose to his feet and approached you, bravely deciding to give you another good onceover after a deep breath, though he kind of lost all sense of feeling in his legs when you smiled at him with that perfect mouth of yours...
"Wow." George sighed, eyelids falling heavy over his brown irises as he admired you.
"I just... you... wow, Y/n." He couldn't come up with a coherent sentence with the way you were staring at him like that.
God, he was absolutely smitten with you.
Your eyes shone joyously as you placed your hand on your heart, and George, as impossible to him as it seemed, fell so much more in love with you than he was just moments before. Your presence rendered him speechless, and the thought inflated your ego a lot more than you would have expected it to.
George remained silent, but his gaze was still glued to you. He'd looked at you for long enough in his life to probably draw you perfectly by memory, but he still took his time to drink in what he was given; because who knew if he'd ever be able to see more of you than this?
"I... I'm-- I'm speechless, is what I am." He cleared his throat after a moment and said, "I... honestly hope my eyes are doing all the talking for me."
"Aw, you're just a sweetiepie, aren't you?"
You beamed at George, blushing as you took another step toward him. "Well Georgie... if you keep looking at me and sweet-talking the way you are..." your warm words were carefully chosen, and it was obvious that George was hanging into every single word you were saying.
"I may just have to pass on this date and spend tonight with you." Your eyelids fell heavy over your eyes, and you offered George a smile that was suggesting something maybe not so innocent.
"Wh-what?!"
"... I said I'm ready to go." You raised your eyebrow in a little confusion at George's flustered state.
Oh my fucking God she didn't even say that?!
Idiot.
Idiot, idiot, idiot.
"... R-right, yes, of course." George shook his head as if to rid his brain of the idea of tricking him like that again. He offered his arm out to you, and you linked yours with his before walking to the door together.
You passed a mirror on the way out, and George caught a glimpse of the both of your reflections, and his chest felt like it was on fire.
He looked so happy to be with you in that moment.
And you looked so happy to be leaving to spend time with another man.
George just hoped at least the reflection of him and you were going on this date together, and both of those smiles were meant for each other.
George pulled up to whatever restaurant this guy wanted to meet you at, which was on the other side of town. George did not approve of this and even reminded you of this on the way there, though you insisted you'd be fine, like you had the couple of times he mentioned this before.
You looked at him after he threw his car into park, and he gave you a little smile after a moment, but it didn't reach his eyes.
"You do look beautiful, Y/n. This guy... he's very lucky."
"I... I don't know what to say."
"Say you believe me."
You didn't say anything. Instead, you smiled sadly, and leaned in to kiss George's cheek. His skin darkened to pink beneath your lips before you could pull away and leave the car with another goodbye, though his ears were ringing and he missed your final farewell.
She doesn't believe me...
George waited until he saw you were seated in the restaurant to put his car back into drive, but something kept him from lifting his foot off the brake. He watched you adjust your silverware at your table, and clasp your hands together in wait.
... Maybe George wanted to wait for this guy to show up.
But would he really want to kill himself by spying on you and watching you fall for someone who wasn't him over the course of one night?
That was the question that made him decide to look back, and pull out of his parking space before he could spot anyone even go near the building. He was in drive and speeding home moments later.
The car ride back to his flat was a quiet one. George kept the radio off, and his fingers drummed against the steering wheel the whole time as if he were almost impatient to get home and do nothing.
Every time he looked in the rear view mirror and saw his eyes stare back at him, it just reminded him that his reflection left that restaurant alone and just as disappointed as his real counterpart.
It wasn't long before George pulled into his building's parking space and sulked out of his car, slamming the door shut. His eyes and nose were burning from the assault of unfallen tears.
He dropped you off to meet this guy. This was all on him this time.
George loved you. He loved you with all his heart, enough to swallow his pride-- sacrifice his happiness for your own.
As much as he didn't want to admit it, dropping you off that night felt like he was letting you go.
And was he?
He pretty much stumbled through the door because his fucks to give for himself were pretty much nonexistent at this point. He kicked his shoes off, not caring if he scuffed up the wall with black marks.
He just wanted to have a long hot shower, crawl into bed, and hide from everyone.
And that's just what he did.
His shower was well over an hour long, and that's where he broke down and cried for the majority of the time. He cried about you, and the situation his own decisions put himself in. He cried in jealousy for the threat sweeping you off your feet right now, and he cried as if that was the last night he'd ever see you again.
When he got out of the shower, well after the stream went cold, he had no more tears to shed. He was dehydrated, and he felt broken. He did a half-assed job of drying himself off before leaving the bathroom and collapsing into bed, only a towel secured around his hips.
His face was pressed into his pillow, and he tucked his arms beneath it and submerged himself even further into the soft fabric.
He recently switched detergent to whichever one you regularly used, and he just took in the familiar scent; anything to make him feel more at home without you actually being present...
George had no idea how long he was in that position for, but he fell asleep like that, only to wake to the sound of the phone ringing.
He got up and stumbled out of his room to ease the obnoxiously loud phone by picking up the call, shouting, and hanging up on whoever decided to phone at this hour-- whichever hour it was.
"Yeah," George rasped through the receiver, his tone laced with underlying irritation. He just wanted to be left alone in his sadness.
"George..."
"... Y/n?" He was rubbing the sleep from his eyes with the palm of his hand before you spoke, but your voice made him freeze.
"Oh Georgie..." your voice was breaking over the phone, and he could tell it wasn't the connection.
"Y/n, my Love, what's the matter?!"
"George he... He didn't show." George's heart stopped.
He didn't show.
George's grip closed tighter and tighter on the phone receiver, and he could feel the pure rage bubbling in his chest, and the plastic receiver crackling from the force under his fingers.
"Where are you?" He demanded. "I'm coming right now to get you," George was about to start throwing his shoes on, despite wearing absolutely nothing to start off with, his towel discarded and still on the bed from when he passed out.
"The same place you dropped me off."
God dammit, this fucking guy had you go to the other side of town just to be forgotten about.
It was finally settled: if George ever found out who this guy was, he'd kill him for doing this to you.
"Don't move. Be there in five." As soon as George hung up the phone, he took off to his room. He was ready in record time: under a minute. Up until the day he died, George wouldn't have been able to dress as quick as he did that night, and he never knew how he did it.
What really mattered was that George got to the other side of town in about five minutes, as he said over the phone.
George whipped into the parking lot and got out of the car. He hurried over to the front of the building to go in and search for you, but he caught a glimpse of you sitting at the curb as he grabbed the door handle.
His grip eased on the lockset, and he slowly turned to you. You were facing away from him, arms folded as you tried to shield yourself from the cool evening wind. You had no clue he was even behind you.
George sighed gently, shedding his jacket off and placing it on your shoulders without another word. He could see your whole body relax from the weighted piece of clothing, and he wondered if his scent was comforting for you too, as it was vice versa.
George heard you breathe out, but you sniffled afterwards. It broke his heart to see you like this. George looked around to see if anyone was watching, because if there was a chance this guy was cackling away in a parked car at the sight of you in tears, George would have had no problem kicking his headlights in and slashing his tires.
He dropped to the curb and sat down right next to you, not hesitating to circle his arm around your body.
At his touch, you curled yourself into a ball, and George scooped you up to squeeze you tight. And against his chest, when you knew you were safe from all harm, you gently sobbed.
George let you cry it all out, and the tighter you held onto him, the tighter he held onto you.
"Am I just unlovable George...? Is that it?" Your words were quiet and muffled, but George heard every syllable you mustered.
He pulled away from your embrace to look you in the eyes, and his grip on your arms were firm, but not tight. "Now Y/n, you do not for one second even think you're unlovable. That is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard." His eyebrows were lowered in anger at the very idea of you feeling unloved.
Tears began to well up in your eyes, and George's expression softened. He reached his hand up to your face, and he could feel you shaking. He pursed his lips and furrowed his brow again.
George wished then more than ever that he was the one who was supposed to see you. He would have shown up.
"Y/n, you deserve so much better than this. If you were mine, I’d make sure sitting alone on the curb, stood up, would be the last place you'd ever find yourself, especially when you were so excited to go out..."
George didn't know where his little spurt of confidence came from, but he was more focused on the words he was choosing to use with you, and what he was all going to say.
"... If I were yours...?" You sniffled again, cheeks and the tip of your nose turning pink and George paused at the sudden realization.
You still had a chance to be his.
And all because that boy didn't show up, he still had time to figure out how he could pull it all off; but it had to be tonight.
He took a deep breath.
"I mean, anyone would be lucky to date you. I just... I sometimes wonder why you were never mine. Why you're not mine..." his voice lowered throughout the sentence, and the end of his confession was barely above a whisper.
You watched George for a moment, lips parted, as if you couldn't believe your ears, and the young man panicked a little, deciding to disregard his last words before it suddenly became the topic of discussion.
"Oh, my Love," George's eyes suddenly saddened as he reached out to wipe away your fresh tears and smeared makeup with his thumb. Your bottom lip trembled at the contact, and he sighed.
"Just because he didn't show up doesn't mean your evening has gone to waste." He stood up and turned to look down at you.
"The night is still young." He then held his hand out in front of you, and you looked at it for a moment as if you didn't know what he wanted from you.
"Y/n... give me one night. Let me show you how a man should always treat you."
He wasn't quite sure if he just unintentionally asked you on a real life date, or if you thought of all this as an act, but even if you didn't reciprocate his feelings, it gave George the chance of a lifetime to at least pretend you were his, even if this opportunity only lasted one night.
"Please."
You didn't move at first, but George was patient. You eventually slowly reached your hand out, and George helped you up, not making the effort to let go of you afterwards.
George looked up at the restaurant, and did a double take. "... You... you don't even like fancy places like this, am I wrong?"  All you could think about when looking at him was that he knew you so well.
"A place like this on a first date is a clear sign he'd leave halfway through and I'd be stuck with the bill." George smiled a little, and so did you.
You wiped your final stray tear from your cheek and George gave your other hand a squeeze. "... I'd rather get a burger and go for a walk, to be honest."
"Then that's what we'll do," George confirmed with a nod. It was settled, then.
George and you strolled to the car, still hand-in-hand, and he courteously opened your door to help you in. He ran over to the other side afterwards and climbed in behind the wheel before pulling out and taking off to find somewhere for you both to eat.
You both came across this quiet burger place downtown, and the both of you were able to get a booth in the back for privacy so you could both scarf down your meals in peace.
George ordered the same food you did, and you both settled on sharing a milkshake together (a single milkshake eventually became two).
"God," you looked around the nearly empty joint before turning your gaze back to George. "Do you know how much more comfortable I feel in here?"
"Even when you're dressed like you belong in a dress shop window?" George smiled around his straw and you matched his grin. "Shut up. At least my hair is brushed out."
The poor guy had no clue until now that he forgot to comb his hair out after his depression shower, embarrassingly clawing his fingers through his locks to at least tidy up the mess on his head.
You just laughed out that you were teasing him, and the joyous hiccups from your laughter had George briefly forgetting everything negative that had happened so far that night.
After settling down a little, your food was brought out and you both started eating.
There wasn't much for the both of you to talk about other than the part of your day when you weren't together, and it wasn't like George wanted to mention what happened to him in the last two hours or make you upset by talking about your night.
Instead you both settled on joking about old times. Before the both of you knew it, George had you giggling and smiling once again before your dessert even came, and when the waitress came around to your table with your two-person cookie skillet, you grinned even wider.
You thanked the waitress before she went on her way, and you looked up across the treat to George, whom you were half expecting to be drooling over the cookie. Instead, he was in a dream-like trance, soft gaze fixed on you, and only you. You weren't too sure if he even knew the skillet was in front of him, he was so distracted.
"George...?" You called to him gently as to not frighten him when coming back down to reality. His response was almost immediate, like he could hear you.
And maybe he did.
"... I'm sorry, I don't know how many times I've tried to say this already tonight but have chickened out, but you look just..." George was examining every inch of you that he could see and you blushed, casting your eyes down to the table.
"Angel, look at me." George reached over the table and rested his hand over yours. You lifted your head to look him in the eye, and he hesitated for a moment. Your full attention flustered him, then again it always did, but he took a deep breath.
"You look heavenly, Y/n."
You said nothing. This time, he had you speechless, but nothing wasn't the response he was looking for.
"Dontcha believe me...?" His question echoed through your brain, and you blinked. George scanned your eyes after giving your hand a squeeze. He knew you had something to say, and he was at the edge of his seat in anticipation for your words.
"... Do you really think so?"
"Are you kidding me?! Y/n, I... when you came out of your room tonight I just... looking at you right now, I'm at a loss for words. Heavenly doesn't even scratch the surface. No word exists that perfectly describes how you look to me. Now, or ever."
There was yet another spurt of confidence that washed over George. He had a feeling his words and actions were getting the both of you somewhere, especially when his final sentence had you blushing the way you were.
At least he knew he was doing something right.
George's grip on your hand tightened a little, and he flipped your hands over so your palm was face-up in his. He brought your hand closer to him, and he kissed your fingertips before leaving a final one at the centre of your palm. His eyes never left your red face as he did this, and he grinned against your hand when you offered him a shy smile.
Oh... she IS actually liking this.
When he pulled away, George looked down at the still-untouched dessert, and he smiled, releasing another nervous breath he was holding as he finally let go of your hand. "Let's finish up so we can go on our walk. Sound good, my Love?"
You only nodded before digging in with him, every nudge of his hand against yours reducing you to a blushing mess, and George, who was gaining more confidence as every second passed, would just smile to himself knowing he was successfully turning the tables on you.
But it wasn't yet the time to give in and confess, as much as George wanted to. He still had a nice long walk to woo you on, and then he had to do the important step of walking you to your apartment door at the end of the night, and God knows that was the part he was dying to get to.
You finished your dessert not long after and George payed the bill. After helping you out of the booth, you'd left hand-in-hand again.
The both of you stepped out into the cool night and you looked up at George. "Are you cold? Did you want your jacket back?"
You were holding it in your other hand since you'd taken it off at dinner, and you shoved it in his direction without another word.
He laughed and took the jacket from you, unfolding it and pulling it back around your shoulders before rubbing his hands up and down your arms to keep you warm.
"You'll catch a cold without it. Besides, you look better in it anyways." He leaned in and kissed your cheek, smiling proudly to himself when he pulled away and continued to lead you to the car, deciding it'd be smoother to not turn around and gauge for a reaction from you.
Like before, George courteously opened the car door for you, and closed it when you were in. Their destination was his place. It wasn't for the reason one would think, but the idea of driving you to his home and inviting you in with every intention of walking right past the kettle made George's legs restless.
In reality there was a park down the road from his flat that cut pretty much directly to your own humble abode. You'd walked the trail hundreds of times together to look at the pretty flowers growing in the garden, but something told George that this time, like everything else happening that day, was going to be very different.
When you pulled up to his building he raced you to get to your door for the second time of the night; the first being at the burger place when you first arrived. He took your hand and helped you out of the car, and he didn't let go, even after locking the doors to his car and leading you both down the road.
There was a silence that fell between the both of you. It wasn't bad. You took this time to think about your night, as did George. With every step down the road and into the park you took, the smile on your face only grew wider. As for George, he began to sweat with every step he took.
Every foot forward led him closer and closer to your door, where he was going to finally let everything off his chest and confess to you. The problem was that George's confidence was quickly draining, and this was something he needed to do.
He eventually let go of your hand to wipe his palms off on his pant leg, and at the immediate loss of contact, you were turning to him with a confused look on your face.
"Sorry uh..." he breathed out slowly, cheeks dusted pink. "I-I don't know why, but I'm kinda nervous."
Your look of confusion faded into an unreadable one. "Was it holding my hand?"
George shook his head. "No no, not that, I want to hold your hand."
"So what's the problem?"
He just shook his head again. "Maybe it's just... the stress of making sure tonight is perfect for you."
"What?!" Your reaction was sudden, and George's eyebrows were raised high up on his forehead at your exclamation.
"George, tonight has already been perfect for me! I had a great meal, I'm on a lovely walk with you..." you reached out to take his hand again, and he lifted his gaze from his shoes to look you in the eye. You smiled up at him from under the streetlight, and George smiled back a little.
"Georgie, I would never have asked for a better night." You squeezed his fingers with yours and tugged him forward gently. "C'mon, Magpie. Let's get home. It'll be cooling down soon, and I don't want you walking outside much longer than needed tonight."
George followed behind, but you still took your time coming home since the both of you got caught up in another conversation. This time, it was about the flowers you were passing in the park.
"... I used to water those for you, y'know." He pointed to a cluster of marigolds. To think that was ten years earlier and they still stayed put, growing outwards and stronger than ever.
"I used to check on them every day to make sure they weren't dying. You told me one time you really liked those flowers and I just..." he smiled a little at the memory. "I just couldn't get enough of your smile every time you saw them."
You turned to look up at him. You had absolutely no clue he did that for you. It made you love the flowers even more, and your heart jumped a little when you realized that the marigolds were the very reason George insisted you both took the trail all the tine.
"I'll still come across them when passing flower shops. I always think of you when I see them."
"Wow. George, I... I never knew you paid that much attention to me."
"Why wouldn't I? You're my best friend."
And George didn't say anything after that, especially when you didn't respond to his last comment, which he didn't even mean to say.
By the time George could think up a sentence to save himself from friend-zoning the both of you right then and there, he felt like he'd left it for too long.
His heart was sinking, and he tried to shake off the comment best he could, and walked you the rest of the way home.
His stomach was in a knot as he looked up at your apartment building. The front door to the lobby looked intimidating, and his palms began to sweat again. You slipped your hand out of George's, and it distracted him from his racing thoughts.
"You think I'm gonna just leave you here?" His question was sudden, and you blinked once.
"I'm sorry?" You looked from George, to the apartment door which was ten feet away from the both of you. "But George, I'm home?"
"I have to walk you to your door." You laughed at his response, head thrown back as you sighed. "You mean to tell me you, George Harrison, are gonna walk up five flights of stairs in the next two minutes just to make sure you can hear me lock my door and know I'm safe?"
"Would it be a real date if I didn't?"
There was another beat of silence as George watched your eyes shift from left to right in thought. You pursed your lips a little, and then looked him in the eye.
"... Suppose it wouldn't be then, no."
"Then may I walk you to your door, Y/n?"
You finally answered him with a simple nod of your head, and George reached out to take your hand again. He wordlessly led you to the door which he opened for you, and then brought you to the flight of stairs. Nowhere else to go but up.
In about two minutes, you and George got to the fifth floor. As soon as he entered the hall, it felt like the walls were slowly closing together as you both took quiet, careful steps towards the end of the way.
The entire time, your hands were glued together, and no one let go, even when you were both finally stopped, and standing in front of your door.
"I'm sorry about tonight, Y/n. I know you were saying earlier tonight turned out perfect and everything but..." George's brain was still on that platonic comment he made on the walk.
"George, there is no one I would have rather spent tonight with than you. No one."
George squeezed your hand, and then sighed. "I just wish tonight happened under different circumstances."
"Different circumstances?" You repeated a little confused, and the boy in front of you pursed his lips and nodded his head.
Deep breaths. Here it goes.
"Y/n, ever since I found out about this date, my blood has just been boiling with jealousy for that boy. Hell, I still don't even know his name and I could tell you he isn't good for you."
You looked taken aback. Jealousy was definitely not where you thought he was going with all of this.
"I fell in love with you, Y/n. Years ago. And because I feared rejection, I didn't want to take my chances and say anything. But the truth of the matter is that I'd be the happiest person alive just to be able to love you openly. I can't stand to see you cry the way he made you tonight."
Again, you stood there, no words coming to mind to respond with. Your silence didn't make George stop.
"To think for years my feelings for you haven't gone away. I've always thought you felt the same, yet you were never mine." George paused. "When can this boy get you back again, Y/n?"
There was a long silence, his eyes searching yours for your answer, and you were staring up at him like a deer in headlights.
"I-- if I'd known-- I never thought-- George, I had no clue." He could see the lost look on your face, and it made his heart ache, especially when your lip began to tremble and your eyes started filling to the brim with tears.
"Why do you think I turned down every guy who's tried to get with me? I just... I never thought you'd love me back, Georgie." His emotions sank into a deep dark guilt. All this time, and you felt the same way about him...
And then he blinked.
You feel the same way about him!
George reached out to you, his hand cupping the side of your face and stroking your cheek with his thumb. Your tears began to fall, and he pulled you into his chest tightly for a moment. "My Love," he mumbled, pulling away just far enough for him to see your face again.
"Oh, even when you're crying, you are the most beautiful thing I've ever set eyes on..." There was a beat of nothing; just the sound of shallow breaths shared between the both of you before George began to inch in slowly towards you.
"... George, what are you doing...?" Your question was gentle, and you didn't stop him from coming any closer. You didn't want to stop him.
"Something I should've done a long time ago."
His attention fixated to your mouth once before your lips finally clashed together.
For over a decade, George had waited for the moment he tasted your lips; and now that it was here, he was almost scared he wouldn't know what to do.
The both of you were holding your breath since you both felt a little unsure at first, but it was a given, he was kissing his childhood best friend, and you were, too. You kissed back a little, and George exhaled lightly through his nose, a little relieved knowing you were getting a little more comfortable with the situation.
George's hands fell to your waist, fingers curling around your body as he eventually pulled you even closer. You parted your lips a little, and he bit down on your bottom lip, pulling away after hearing you gasp.
"Oh! Did I hurt you? I'm--" George could barely rush an apology out before you pulled him down to kiss him again, and pushing him backwards until his back was flat against your door. He watched as you closed the space between you again, and your lips were on his again.
His heart was pounding, ears ringing loudly as you slipped your tongue into his mouth, and all the boy could remember thinking about was how blissful it all was in that moment. George threw his arms around you and started pushing back just a little.
You pulled away from him to gasp in a breath, George's hands grabbing your arms and pinning you against your door so he could put you in the place he was moments before; to give you the moment to experience just a fraction of all the love he would be able to eventually give to you.
His lips briefly found the crook of your neck and you moaned quietly as George sucked at your skin a little, which only resulted in him pulling away just to lean back in to kiss your lips and swallow your pleasant hums.
You eventually pulled away to face him again, lips swelled and pink, and breaths quick. You never thought you'd have so much trouble breathing while kissing someone.
Then again, it's not everyday that the man you're kissing is George Harrison.
"I know it's rare to ask this on a first date but..." George leaned down to attach his lips to the column of your throat, and he hummed against your skin when you moaned gently, delaying your question for a moment.
"... Did you maybe wanna, I don't know, come in, stick around for some tea?"
"Is that even a question?" George asked lowly against your neck, and you smiled. You reached into your purse to retrieve your apartment keys, which you blindly stuck into the keyhole since George was back to kissing you again, and the both of you stumbled through the door as soon as you got it open.
You and George kicked your shoes off after shutting the door, and you pushed him up against the wall in the front corridor to kiss him once again.
Ten years was way too long for the both of you to be deprived of one another any further, and George gladly let you migrate your lips to his neck after a moment, tilting his head back for you to make things a little easier.
With your head buried into his neck and your arms circled around one another, George lazily opened this eyes to watch himself in that same mirror across the hall he looked into a few hours prior.
All the boy could do was smile to himself, breathing heavily as he watched your reflection switch to the other side of his neck after leaving a mark on the right side of his throat.
Not only was his reflection successful in this date tonight, but George himself pulled off the biggest risk he could imagine and it paid off.
He finally got the girl of his dreams.
----------------------------------------
A/A/N: honestly, this fic lives rent free in my head and it has been since I wrote it, so I gotta show it off to y'all. Again, I know it was long, but I really hope you enjoy it <3
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thedamageofherdays · 3 years
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This week's (16-08-2021 - 22-08-2021) reading log is here. This week's reading log is super duper long and filled with lots of good things (my apologies for the long post, I really could not find a good spot to do a read more). I discovered some new favourites and re-read some old favourites and while I had an intense week personally at least the fics I read were absolutely phenomenal. I do recommend checking out the warnings as some fics are a bit heavier/angstier and you might wanna be prepared. Most of these fics are Stucky but there are a couple of other ships in between.
If you are looking for more fun and/or good things make sure to check out the @marveldisabilitycelebration as well to see all the awesome art, fics, meta, etcetera people created! And while I am mentioning events I am a mod for let me also just quickly mention that sign-ups for the @stuckygiftexchange are still open until the end of the month <3
Favourites are marked with a 🌻 Fics that are only available to AO3 users are marked with a 🔒 and Tumblr fics are marked with a 🍀
🌻 The Bends by dreamsinthewitchouse @dreamsinthewitchouse [Danbeau, side Stucky, 2k words, Teen]
Memory is not a house you can just walk back into after finding the key you thought you’d lost. It’s a thing you wade into and out of, rewriting it as it rewrites you.
It’s not without its rewards, either - recovering a memory about Maria and Monica, about her life, feels better than socking a thousand bad guys in the face, better than all the photon blasts in the world.
Then again, realising there’s still memories she can’t access, even after all this time, feels like drowning in space.
Not the one out there - the one inside her.
🌻 Sweet & Salty by musette22 @musette22 [Stucky, 3k words, Teen]
Idiots in love. That's it. That's the fic.
When life gives you lemons by moonythejedi394 @moonythejedi394 [Stucky, 34k words, Explicit] (11/15 chapters)
Or 13 Terrible Things to Do With Lemons Other Than Making Lemonade
Steve Rogers is a home health nurse. He works for an agency, which assigned him to the aging Winifred Barnes, the one and only Silent Era Hollywood darling. As her needs increased, she requested the agency assign Steve to her full-time. She could pay for it, so she got it. Steve then moved in with her, becoming her caregiver; he cooked, he cleaned, he managed her medications, he made sure she was comfortable.
Winifred's children treated him less than ideally. He was the help, after all. And then Steve had the audacity to go and turn out to be eldest son James Barnes's soulmate. No one saw that coming.
🍀 SamRhodey Tumblr Fic by ipoiledi [SamRhodey, ? words, Teen?]
“Wilson, this is Rhodey; Rhodey, Wilson,” Tony Stark says, and suddenly some six foot tall sexy guy is shoved right in front of Sam, and they both stumble a little, bumping into each other. This is a crowded party. “You guys have things in common, right?” Stark asks. “Uh, Army stuff. Talk about that. I hate wallflowers; stop wallflowering and talk to each other.”
Shorteralls by moonythejedi394 [Stucky, 6k words, Explicit]
The first time Bucky ever saw Steve Rogers, he was struck by how Neanderthal-like his response was. It was immediately followed by a bout of mental scolding. The second time was just about the same. The third time, it was actually appropriate for Bucky to start a conversation with him, at which point he was determined to be the gentleman.
No such luck. Steve Rogers is, always has been and always will be, a relentless flirt. These days, Bucky's Neanderthal-ist feelings about Steve are consensual and highly appreciated. More so now that they're having a baby.
what the fuck are perfect places anyway by tigerlilycorinne [Stucky, 6k words, Teen]
Steve clears his throat and stands. “Well, I should head in. I might want to begin packing.”
Bucky stills. “You won’t,” he says, trying to sound commanding. It only comes out uncertain. “Don’t.”
Steve shakes his head. “Maybe not tonight,” he says, and Bucky knows they’ll be discussing this again soon.
“Then stay. Play… play cards with me or something.”
Steve’s eyebrows jump up, his mouth tugging up in another of his bemused smiles that do things to Bucky’s insides, but he drops his hand from the doorway and steps back into Bucky’s room. Somehow, Bucky feels as if he’s won—not the war, just the battle.
Steve won’t stay forever. But he’ll stay for cards.
Steve and Bucky, on the run after Civil War (with a few alterations to canon), are laying low in Wakanda. But they can’t stay there forever.
🌻 honestly thought i’d be dead by now, but what you can trust is that i need your touch by moonythejedi394 [Stucky, 105k words, Explicit]
Bucky is 37 years old; he’s unmarried, hasn’t had a Sub of his own, is definitely not ripped, comfortable at his job as an Advanced Practice RN at Brooklyn General ER, and just got his Five Years coin from AA.
Steve is 26 years old; he’s unmarried, his last and only Dom has Alzheimer's, he's worryingly muscular, uncomfortable in his job as the government’s poster Alpha for masculinity and strength, and worries more than he should about his BMI.
Unfortunately, Steve and Bucky meet initially in a not-cute moment. Bucky’s tired as shit thanks to the sudden alien invasion that shook New York and Steve is tired as shit because he hasn’t slept more than 20 minutes at a time in – well, since 1936, probably. Bucky’s Alpha instincts get irritated at the sudden presence of another "Alpha" into his territory and Steve’s suppressed submissive tendencies latch onto this grumpy bachelor Alpha and he only suppresses it further.
Bucky’s grumpiness and Steve’s duckling impressionism aside, both of them are a mess. But since both of them are a mess? Their messes seem to fit pretty well together.
Deep Sea Diving by Aida Ronan [Stucky, 5k words, Explicit]
Steve's wallowing in heat-related misery under a shade tree in Central Park when a man walks by in bright red booty shorts and a crop top. RIP Steve Rogers. It was nice knowing you.
honey, make this easy by steebadore [Stucky, 8k words, Explicit]
Bucky likes the way he looks. His silk button up with the tiny gold polka dots feels soft on his skin and is tailored perfectly; no pulling at his chest or belly. His hair falls in shiny dark waves and his skin is smooth and dewy. He looks expensive. He looks taken care of. He looks like Steve’s.
🌻 let's take it back to the start by howdoyousleep @howdoyousleep3 [Stucky, 6k words, Teen]
How it all began.
This sleepwalking through my life. by barthelme [Stucky, 1k words, Explicit]
The internet is an interesting place and when Bucky came home (or, when he came to live with Steve), Steve did a lot of research. Apparently, it’s not safe to wake a sleepwalker. He assumes that waking a sleepwalker with traumatic dreams and PTSD is beyond just being frowned upon.
And he tells himself--has told himself--that this is safer for Bucky. That if he were to stop him and wake him up, that Bucky would be mortified to be slurping on his best friend’s cock. That all of the improvements he’s made would be lost, would be repressed, would be just--
They’d be back at square one.
So he lets Bucky do it.
🌻 the way i've been craving by howdoyousleep [Stucky, 3k words, Explicit]
"Lunch break at 12:30. My office. Hope you’re hungry…"
It’s the ellipsis that sends Bucky’s insides swimming warmly, his heart beating twice as fast against his ribs where he sits in class. Senator Rogers is concise, direct, to the point. Without an ellipsis this is lunch, this is a meeting. With it though?
This is a booty call.
nasty but classy by howdoyousleep [Stucky, 4k words, Explicit]
“No, you don’t have to know the purpose, that doesn’t matter. Nat showed me this challenge where couples drink a lot of wine and get drunk together but they can’t touch each other. And whoever touches the other first has to...has to give the other head.”
🌻 Put It on Repeat, It Stays the Same by giselleslash [Stucky, 20k words, Explicit]
Steve and Bucky have a one night stand that turns into a friends with benefits situation. A weekend snowed in at Bucky’s apartment brings to light how much that really doesn’t suit either one of them.
Greetings to the New Brunette by victoria_p (musesfool) [Stucky, 10k words, General]
"You said he should have a hobby. That it would help."
"I meant, like, knitting or coin collecting. Motocross, if he was feeling antsy. A baby's not a hobby. It's lifetime commitment."
🌻 Rogers & Barnes: Partners by triedunture [Stucky, 10k words, Teen]
Steve and Bucky have to pose as a couple for a mission. Nat insists it really is the only option. She's checked.
The complication: unbeknownst to even Natasha, Steve and Bucky's friendship has been rocky ever since Bucky confessed his tender feelings and Steve left him out in the cold. Can asexual, completely-in-love-with-his-angry-best-friend Steve complete the mission and win Bucky's heart?
(The answer is yes. Yay!)
this will be our year (took a long time to come) by biblionerd07 [Stucky, 4k words, General]
Bucky's therapist is worried he's using Steve as a crutch and wants him to try going on outings without Steve. It wouldn't be terrible, honestly, if Bucky could just manage to open his mouth and say something to Steve.
I'll hold my breath by Little_Lottie (tfwatson) [Stucky, 8k words, Mature]
Sometimes Bucky’s hands flex in Steve's direction. Neither of them knows exactly why, but at least one of them has a hunch.
Bucky touches everything but Steve, even though Steve is all he really wants to touch.
Start from the Beginning by Mumble_Bee [Stucky, 13k words, Explicit]
What about a sex pollen fic where the pollen-ed one doesn’t remember getting hit in the face with a sex flower, and wakes up midway through the depollenating?
Or: the one where Steve wakes up on his back with a stranger buried balls-deep in his ass.
Match by emphasisonem [Stucky, 4k words, Mature]
The situation’s actually kind of funny from the right perspective, Bucky thinks as he reads the message for what feels like the hundredth time. He’s finally matched with a hot, funny guy. Tall and broad and clean cut. An absolutely breathtaking smile. Bucky’s walking wet dream. And he’s good. They haven’t messaged on the app, but Bucky already knows him.
He knows him because Steve Rogers is an art history professor at his university. His art history professor.
Best friends and married since childhood by StuckySituation [Stucky, 1k words, General]
Inspired by @/peterssquill's post in tumblr: "bucky and steve got married on the playground when they were like eight and though neither of them would ever admit it to anyone, even each other, they still consider it official"
~♥~ ♥~ ♥~
“Natasha, stop trying to set me up with every woman you meet, I’m-”
“Too shy? Too scared?”
“No, I’m-”
“Too busy? You’re mostly retired these days, not a good excuse anymore.” Natasha smirks and then drawls: “Or just too gay?”
Steve flushes at that, even if isn’t true -- he’s bisexual, not gay. “Let it go, Nat, I’m not looking for anything. I’m already married, for fuck’s sake.”
Clearly not what she expected. “What.”
Steve grimaces. He didn’t mean to tell anyone that, ever.
“Sorry, can’t talk about it right now!” he says and jumps out of the plane.
Nobody Should Be Alone on a Holiday by emphasisonem [Stucky, 2k words, Teen]
“So, um-” Bucky begins speaking again, pulling Steve from his less-than-work-appropriate thoughts. The brunet has shoved his hands into the pockets of his dark slacks, and he’s shifting from one foot to the other as he smiles shyly. “I have a question for you.”
“Shoot,” Steve grins, leaning back in his chair and crossing his arms over his broad chest. Bucky swallows deeply as one of his hands comes up to pull at the collar of his button-up, and Steve can’t help following the motion of his Adam’s apple.
“I was, uh-” Bucky continues- “That is, I heard you don’t have Thanksgiving plans?”
In which Bucky finds out that Steve's going to be alone on Thanksgiving and invites his coworker to spend the holiday with him.
🌻 It's Been A Long Season Through by thiccbuckybarnes @thiccbuckybarnesfic [Stucky, 49k words, Explicit]
Bucky Barnes is in desperate need of a change in scenery, which is why he makes the foolhardy decision to quit his job, leave his asshole of a fiance, pack up his life, and move to his grandfather’s old farm all within a single day.
He expects confusion, hardship, and maybe even failure. But love? He wasn’t expecting that.
--
Or, a Stucky Stardew Valley AU that nobody but me wanted and that’s ok.
oh, peach pit, where'd the hours go? by thiccbuckybarnes [Stucky, 10k words, Explicit]
Can't see the forest for the trees.
--
Or, Steve learns that just because he and Bucky got their happily ever after, it doesn’t mean the past won’t come back to bite them.
I'll find my way by rainbow_nerds [Stucky, 725 words, Teen]
Steve had watched Bucky fall, and nothing had been the same since.
AU-gust day 19: Daemons
special delivery by glim @glim [Stucky, 6k words, Teen]
It's not that Steve's bad at taking care of himself when he gets sick; he just wishes he didn't have to all the time.
At least he can order most of what he needs online. That's some small comfort, that he can have soup and ice cream and everything else brought to his door.
at first chance i'd take the bed warmed by the body by spacebuck @spacebuck [Stucky, 8k words, Explicit]
This close, Steve can see exactly how beautiful his hands are. He’s never really noticed before, or at least he’s never really had a reason to notice, but the man’s hands are large, tanned like he works outside all day. There’s an endearing callus on the heel of one of his palms, and Steve can’t quite work out when calluses became endearing.
Steve pauses the video. Swallows hard. Casts his eyes around for anything that’ll keep his mind off the hands on his screen, off the words inked into those hands, the delicate shape of a bird’s wing, the curling edge of a vine.
He looks down. The name of the channel is right there, blaring the man’s name right into Steve’s brain until it feels like he’s known it all along.
Bucky Barnes.
OR: the one where Bucky's a youtuber who solves puzzles on camera, and steve's smitten and horny
🌻 Rock On! by millesable @marvelousescapism [Clintasha, 700 words, General]
“Hey, Romanoff!”
He lifted his hand, index finger and pinky finger raised, thumb out, all other fingers tucked. Their secret sign; their confession for the world to see, safe in the knowledge that the world wasn’t listening.
“Rock on!”
🌻 You Like the Way I Look by dontcallmebree @iamthe-wo-manwhocan [Stucky, 2k words, Explicit]
Bucky sidles up to him, hand boldly coming to rest on his chest. “What about you, big guy? Care for a dance?” Steve watches Bucky’s eyes twinkle with satisfaction, somehow already knowing he’s got Steve on the hook.
A decade out of the ice, Steve Rogers returns to New York. Reeling from a battle against the Chitauri, a night with the troublesome Bucky Barnes might be just what he needs.
Join the Rebellion by rainbow_nerds [Stucky, 765 words, Teen]
Bucky knew he shouldn't be out after curfew, but he couldn't resist the urge. He didn’t know where he was going, but he knew it was where he wanted to be.
AU-gust day 20: Dystopia
🔒 Five Days in December by mywingsareonwheels @mywingsareonwheels [Evanstan, 4k words, Teen]
“Shit shit shit shit...” muttered Chris to himself, glad that the sound of piped Christmas carols was drowning out his swearing amid the picture books. Most of the store was heaving even though it was Sunday, he’d been recognised at least three times, finding presents for all of his nieces and nephews was proving far more of a headache than expected, and he’d just sent a pile of copies of "Strictly No Elephants" tumbling off the bookshelf.
He scrambled about trying to pick them all up, and then dropped them again as someone bumped right into his backside. He lost his balance, caught himself against a bookcase, and a landslide of "Carter Is a Painter’s Cat" joined "Strictly No Elephants" on the floor. He yelped.
“Ah fuck, I’m so sorry… Chris!”
* * * * * * * * * *
London, December 2021. Amid cats, books, and the cold English drizzle, Chris finds everything he was hoping for and thought he would never have.
* * * * * * * * * * * *
Reaching for Fire by dixons_mama @dixons-mama [Stucky, 7k words, Explicit]
Bucky has always felt a fire in his heart (and other body parts) when it came to his boss, Steve Rogers, but he's made sure to never feed those flames. When he finds out about Steve's second job, though, he's tempted to let that fire out.
i've been dreaming of a face like yours by thiccbuckybarnes [Stucky, 3k words, Explicit]
Bucky is about to busy himself with making a small dinner for himself when he stops in his tracks at the figure drinking a cup of coffee in the kitchen, leaning against the counter and smirking at him.
It’s Steve.
“Surprise, sweet boy,” he says before setting his cup down.
--
Or, PWP reunion sex
🌻 Somewhere, Under Your Skin by thiccbuckybarnes [Stucky, 16k words, Explicit]
Bucky Barnes treats himself to a one-night stand after having a very bad no good day.
The sex is good--great, even. Might be the best sex of his life.
But Bucky wouldn’t have slept with the guy if he had known that he was going to continuously run into him every day for the next fucking month.
--
Or, a Big Grump Bucky has a hot one night stand with a college kid who is popping up everywhere in his everyday life and he doesn’t know how to deal with it.
(Written for HYBB Bingo Square: Grumpy Bucky)
i've played heartstrings before but not in your key by thiccbuckybarnes [Stucky, 11k words, Explicit]
He glances down, seeing a folded couple of papers, before peering up at Bucky. The older man is biting his bottom lip, making it pretty and red. Steve wants to run his tongue across where his teeth are digging into his flesh.
"What's this?" Steve asks, setting his phone down, emails forgotten. Bucky shrugs and looks away.
"I dunno. You tell me, genius," he says, sounding bratty enough that it makes Steve's dick twitch in his pants. Jesus, there has to be something wrong with him.
Steve glances once more at Bucky, who now has his arms crossed against his chest and is pointedly not looking at Steve, before picking up the stack of folded papers. He opens them, seeing a collection of maybe five or six sheets of paper. His eyes immediately land on the list of familiar words with negative next to each one. -- Or, Steve Rogers is a jealous, possessive little shit that wants nothing more than to mark up his boyfriend and stake his claim. And Bucky knows it. (And he likes it.)
🌻 I'm Home (With You) by BonkyBornes @padfoot-and-the-marauders [Stucky, 2k words, General]
In any other circumstance, the apartment would've been perfect. But it was today, and the fact that he was here meant he wasn’t out searching. He knew they hadn’t had any leads for weeks and he knew Natasha was right; all three of them were exhausted and a break would do them good. It just felt wrong to Steve that he was comfortable while Bucky was still out there—somewhere. Probably cold. Probably hungry.
The knock came again. Sighing, Steve unwrapped his hand from the dog tags and remembered how to move. Cold wind and snow greeted him when he opened the door. The solitary figure was walking down the steps, collar popped against the chill.
“Did you need something?” he called.
The person stopped. They were still. And then they turned. *
Or, the Christmas Steve deserved after Winter Soldier.
The portrait by rainbow_nerds [Stucky, 915 words, General]
Steve Rogers has a Gift. He can help people find their soulmates, all he needs is some art supplies, a quiet place, and eye contact.
AU-gust day 21: soulmates
Maybe A Muse by buckybarnesdeservestobehappy [Stucky, 2k words, Mature]
When Bucky Barnes needs extra money, he’s appalled that his best friends think he should become a model for the art department on campus. Shy, nerdy, and socially awkward, he’s not sure that’s something he feels comfortable doing. Still, he needs money, and he likes the idea of becoming someone’s muse. The problem is he had no idea two things would happen. First, one of the students in the class is exactly his type; second, he has to model nude.
164 notes · View notes
after-witch · 3 years
Text
Baby Mine [Yandere Overhaul x Reader]
Title: Baby Mine [Yandere Overhaul x Reader]
Synopsis:  The first time you laid eyes on your child, you knew: You had to get out. Set in the ‘White Picket Fence’-verse. 
For request: Something with Overhaul + the reader’s children and manipulation (I’m sorry I accidentally deleted the original message so I don’t remember the exacting wording!)
Word Count: 3328
notes: yandere, stockholm syndrome, abuse
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From the instant you laid eyes on your daughter, the moment your gaze took in her fresh, wet skin and her small, blinking, uncomprehending eyes, you knew: you had to get the fuck away from Chisaki Kai.
The realization was instant, like a flash, peeling away years of manipulation and training and forced self-acceptance of your situation. Years of justifications and excuses that had wormed their way under your skin, forcing you to see the bright side, to see his side, and let yourself get wrapped up in its candy-coated, fluffy cotton bullshit--gone, ripped away with brutal, exacting force. All that was left was the stark realization, a single driving force shoving you forward: you and your daughter were going to get out.
That was four years ago.
Four years of agonizing pretending. Of forcing yourself to put back on the coat you'd worn before, the false version of yourself that loved him and accepted him and excused everything he ever did to you. It was hard. It was harder to pretend that you accepted this than to actually accept it, to indulge in his control. But every time your resolve weakened, it only took a glance at your child to remind you of why you couldn't just give in.
You had to get out, not for yourself, but for her. To give her a normal life. A life where she could be free, where she could have friends, where she could run outside and not be limited to the house or, if the weather was nice, the secure, high-fenced backyard that Kai had only built within the last year.
Four years of pretending. Four years of planning. And, most difficult of all, four years of waiting. Trust was not easily given by Chisaki Kai, even to the mother of his child.
So you waited.
You waited for Kai to move you two--no, three now--into a house, a real house; not in a populated suburb (another broken promise that you swallowed deep, deep down) but an offshoot of some protected compound in a remote area, where it could be secure and guarded. But what mattered is that its doors connected to the outside, not to some unknown underground bunker.  You could manage, if you were connected to the outside.
You waited for Kai to ease up on the restrictions that built up around you during your pregnancy, rules to keep you under a far more watchful eye, rules that made it harder to find a way out. Inches of trust, gradually earned, which made it possible for you to think concretely about escape.
You waited for your daughter to get old enough to run, old enough to survive without needing to be fed every few hours, old enough to know how to stay quiet when told. Watching her grow up only made you want to leave, more. She had a personality now. Stubborn but accepting when she knew she wouldn’t win; sweet in her own way, an unusual way, likely one that came from a lack of interaction with anyone but her parents and a handful of trusted Shie Hassaikai members.
It was one of those trusted members--you never have learned their name, a secret Kai (nor they) were willing to give--that would be your key to escape.
 They loved your daughter, too, in time. They were drawn in by her precociousness, her insistence on formalities and pleases and thank-yous. But it was her bubbliness and inherent interest in the world and people around her that made them decide to love her, too.Her big eyes and bubbling laugh when you two were allowed in the yard, sometimes under this member’s supervision. 
To your daughter’s delight, they didn’t simply watch you like the handful of others did; they joined in the fun. Just a few weeks ago, she’d convinced him to push her so high on the swing set that she’d gone all the way around--even your heart briefly froze until she’d emerged on the other side, cackling with delight, safe and sound.
They were loyal to Overhaul. Of that there was no doubt. Had they killed for him? Maimed? Tortured? You tried not to think about the things that were done in Overhaul’s name.
Yet they’d betrayed him, all for the sake of your daughter. Part of you feels bitter that they wouldn’t betray him for the sake of you--but then, what was that saying? Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth.
It was with their help that you were finally able to secure that last necessary piece of the puzzle for your escape: getting out of the secured, monitored gate surrounding the house unnoticed. He told you in hushed, intense tones that he would be on watch duty the night of your escape, that he would take care of the other member assigned that night, and that all you had to do was get out the door at the agreed time with your bag, your daughter, and a good pair of walking shoes. He would drive you as far as he could, and then you two would run, run, run after that.
It was going to work. Your daughter was going to live her life, a real life, not one carefully constructed in captivity. What would you do first, once you were free? The thoughts sometimes made you so giddy that you pinched yourself to calm down. So close, so close to the finish line, and you must be vigilant.
Tonight. You and your daughter are going to leave tonight.
Your daughter is in her bed, tucked in safe and secure. Her eyes are already closed, and Kai is sitting at the edge of the mattress, as always, smoothing down her hair and pressing a chaste kiss to her forehead. You watch from the doorway with your arms casually crossed, a small, tired, end-of-the-night smile on your lips. It's all so normal, so domestic, isn't it.
"Good night," he says, so soft and sweet that, if you hadn't been pulled out of your deluded coping mechanism, you might find it endearing. Instead, your thoughts scream: This will be the last time you ever see her, you fucked up piece of shit bastard. Oh, do you have a potty mouth when your 'husband' can't hear you...
He leaves your daughter to her dreams and clicks off the little lamp on her nightstand. When he crosses the doorway, you make room and he lets you slide your arm around his, linking yourselves together for the walk to your shared bedroom.
"Tired?" He asks, and you nod. You are tired. Not for the reasons he thinks, and not for the reasons you'll give, but the telltale darkness under your eyes belies the stress of planning your escape from a years-long ordeal.
You sigh, as soft and sweet as his voice was earlier. "Mmhmm. She didn't want to focus on her lessons today. I got a bit frustrated. Sometimes I don't think I'm cut out to be a teacher." By now you're in your bedroom and you casually take off your day clothes, dropping them in the labeled hamper in front of the closet. Your stomach twinges with the memory of how he used to look away when you took off your clothes.
But that was long ago, and now he continues the conversation casually as the pair of you strip and change into your respective pajamas. You slip a pink nightie with ruffled bottom over your head as he
"You just need more practice. Are you reading the lesson books before you start class?"
I wouldn't have to read any lesson books if you let her out of this house, if you let her out of school, if you weren't--you stop your thoughts, afraid that they might show on your face. Afraid that you might lose everything at this last, crucial moment.
But you know you look frustrated, so you roll with it. "Yes," you say, voice just the right amount of annoyed in retort. "But if she doesn't want to sit down and focus, me reading the lesson beforehand isn't really going to help, is it?"
He stares at you, and you wonder in a flash if you went too far. But in the next moment, he's simply continuing to button up his shirt. "Is it going to help our daughter learn if you take out your bad day on your husband?" His voice is dripping with the natural condescension that once had you questioning whether or not it was okay to be upset that he'd kidnapped you, and you hate it. But at least it's a sign that he bought your excuses.
You feel a warm flush of shame at the way his condescension still makes you feel less-than. You slide yourself into bed, under the covers, instinctively grabbing the book on your end table and staring down into it like you could simply disappear inside the pages. You can't mess up anything right now. The weight of what you need to do tonight feels so heavy and you can't stop your hands from trembling slightly.
"Sorry," you whisper, voice thick with emotion. "It's just hard sometimes. I feel in over my head."
It's Kai's turn to slide under the covers, though he doesn't bother grabbing his own book. Instead he gently pushes on your hands until you set the book on the covers. You know he wants you to look at him, so you do. He looks so gentle, so calm. Did he kill anyone today? Did he insult some hapless victim who crossed his organization, spewing venom with his words, before kissing your daughter goodnight hours later?
His gloved hands tip your chin up and it's a familiar feeling, an intimate feeling, when he pulls you in for a kiss. When he pulls away, he's smiling softly, indulgently. You aren't in trouble. You're good.
"I'll come home for lessons tomorrow and see what I can do. Would you like that?"
I'd like you to drop dead and make this easier on us, you think.
"Yes, Kai."
You smile. You nod. You let out a shaky sigh and lean your shoulders against his, picking up your book and signaling an end to the crisis. He lets you read quietly for a while before turning off the lamp on his side of the bed; it's a wordless signal that you already know: time to sleep. You're a dutiful wife and you put your book away and turn off your lamp and then turn back to your husband and whisper,
"Good night, Kai."
**
You wait until he's deep asleep to ease your way out of the bed. Every step you take in your padded socks makes you cringe. Will the floor creak? Will you make too much noise? Will you have to come up with a half-assed excuse as he comes to, groggily asking what you're doing? You feel like you can't breathe, but you do breathe, soft and shallow as you make your way to the bedroom door.
 You didn't dare keep anything related to your escape in your shared bedroom. The door feels like it weighs a thousand pounds as you ever-so-slowly open it, keeping your head turned towards the man sleeping on the bed all the while. He doesn't stir. He simply continues to snore, even as the door opens enough for you to slip out.
Your heart is pounding in your chest as you cross the hallway and into the spare room that you used as a playroom and, lately, a makeshift school. The bag you packed is in the closet, tucked behind bags of school supplies that you'd asked Kai to pick up in order to make sure that your escape bag didn't stand out. You grab it swiftly, along with your daughter's outdoor shoes, and make your way to the most dangerous element of your escape: your daughter's room.
She did so well. You remind yourself to praise her once you're away from the house, once you're in a car and making noise isn't a life or death dilemma. You built up the idea of your escape bit by bit over the past few weeks. You couldn't tell her that her father was a monster who kidnapped you, but you could prey on her desire to see more, to go beyond the rules established in her father's domain.
Don't you want to meet other kids? Go to the beach, feel the sand underneath your feet? Meet... your grandma? We'll just take a secret trip, you and me, and then come back to Papa when we're done. Then he'll see that it's safe to leave and come with us next time. But you have to keep it a secret. You can't tell him a thing, or we won't be able to go. You can keep a secret, can't you?
You kneel next to your daughter's bed and gently wake her up, whispering her name and stroking her hair, so she slowly opens her eyes in confusion before her gaze lands on your face and ah, a smile--it's just mom.
"Mama?" She asks, a bit too loudly for your liking.
"Shh baby," you say. "Yes, it's mama. Are you ready to go?" You see the tentativeness, the childish confusion in the way she nods. She doesn't know what real life is yet, she doesn't have an inkling of the freedom that she's lost, but she will.
You don't bother changing. You have a pair of clothes in the bag and you'll change when you're in a safer space. For now, you take her hand and lead her down the staircase, your chest tightening with every step. You can't help but glance back at the still-open doorway leading to your bedroom. You pray to whatever is listening that he won't wake up. Each step is a step closer to freedom. Each step is a terrifying risk that you or she might slip, might make noise, might wake him up.
Your spirits lift when you reach the bottom of the stairs. All you have to do is get out the door and he'll be waiting there with the key and a getaway car and freedom.
You clutch your daughter's hand, your own palm now sweaty; you nearly trip on a toy you forgot to pick up earlier, but thankfully the light in the entryway was turned on (you must have forgotten to turn it off) and you see it just in time to avoid disaster. You squeeze your daughter hand and turn the corner that leads to the entryway of your home--
Where Chisaki Kai is standing, waiting for you, his eyes practically illuminated by the glowing lamp light.
You drop the bag.
"No," you say. "No." Your mind suddenly feels fuzzy, like its buzzing, drowning out all of your thoughts with a pure denial of what you see in front of you.
"How--how did you--" you sputter, unable to continue voicing your question. It was all planned. It was all practiced. You pretended, you waited, you planned--for four years. How? How did he know?
He doesn't have to answer. You know the moment that your daughter's grip slips out of your hand and she runs up to her father, feet thumping on the floor. She clings to his side and doesn't look at you, and he runs a hand through her hair without taking his eyes away from your shaking form.
Of course she told him. Of course she told her papa that you wanted to leave. She loved him. Why wouldn't she? It was all she'd ever known. You were breaking the rules, breaking the structure that dominated her life since she could remember. 
"Please don't be mad at me, mama." Your daughter whimpers against Kai, and you can hear the tears in her little voice, and your heart aches for her in so many ways.
"I'm not," you whisper. "I'm not mad at you, baby." You're just sad, so sad. It hurts. All of it.
"Sweetheart," Kai says, voice surprisingly calm despite the events, "go back to bed while I help your mother unpack your things, all right?"
Your daughter nods and suddenly she's against you, hugging you in a tight, childish way; you only have enough energy to pull your arm around her, limp and heavy, patting her back without really feeling it before she scampers up the stairs.
You're left alone. With him.
He approaches you slowly and you feel like an animal. There's wildness hammering in your heart and the thought comes up, unwillingly: could you still run? Escape on your own? And hope that some day, your daughter escapes and finds you? But the thought of leaving her behind is impossible to indulge in for more than a second, and you know that without her, your life isn't worth living. The thought of abandoning her to Kai Chisaki brings up an immediate sense of revulsion and guilt and shame.
"What were you thinking?"
You aren't looking at him, but you don't have to be looking at him to know that he's glaring at you. Looking down on you with his gaze filled with righteous justifications. You glance and--yes, he is, but there's something darker, something you’d forgotten, underneath. Your stomach suddenly feels loaded with weights and your legs move backwards, pulling you away from him, away from the anger that feels like it's radiating off him in waves.
He suddenly grips your chin with brutal force and yanks your jaw forward, forcing you to look at him.
"I had to kill one of my most trusted men today because of your..." His eyes dart back and forth for a moment, before he spits out the apparently perfect description of your escape attempt. "Hysteria. An absolute waste of potential, all because of your ridiculousness."
Your mouth is dry. Your voice is hoarse. But you speak up, anyway. You've already lost everything.
"It's not ridiculous to want to get out of here." 
The weight of the years seems to press down on your shoulders, pounding into your bones, screaming in your ears. 
"It's not ridiculous to--to want to take my daughter away from the man who kidnapped me and forced me to pretend like I was happy here, like I was happy living in some--" you cough, needing moisture, but not daring to stop to swallow lest you lose your courage. "--glorified dollhouse while you tell me what to do and what to wear and how to act and when to fuck you and when to have a baby and fuck you, fuck you, just fuck you Kai. I hate you. Oh I fucking hate you."
You don't notice as your voice gets louder, emboldened by the adrenaline that's been crashing through you since you opened the bedroom door, until his hand is gripping your upper arm in a show of brute, vise-length strength.
"Lower. your. voice." 
His grip strengthens until you cry out, and then it gradually loosens without letting you go completely.
For the next few moments, you do nothing but stare at one another. Your mind feels hazy, darting from thought to thought. It was all for nothing. The last four years, all for nothing. But you think about your daughter, about what she may have been able to accomplish outside of these walls, and even the fantasy of a free life for her made it worth something--didn't it?
It's his voice that lowered, now, as he lets you go completely and straightens himself up. All business now. But what business will he engage in, this time?
"Perhaps you do need a vacation," he says, finally. Firmly. He's made a decision.
You wonder if he's lost his mind and you're about to ask as much before he continues.
"Did you know this house has a secret room? It's nice and quiet. The perfect place for you to recuperate until you've regained your senses."
The room, the room, the room.
Your hand instinctively claps against your mouth as you cry out.
After all, you don't want to wake your daughter up with your screams.
500 notes · View notes
cvtqr · 3 years
Text
365
pairings; eren jaeger x reader [+ jean x reader]
notes; this was also posted on my ao3, which has the same username as this one [cvtqr]
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“i never loved you y/n.” 
“WHAT DON’T YOU GET? I NEVER LOVED YOU SO STOP COMING HERE Y/N.” 
he slammed the door in your face. you didn't know why he was treating you this way. you've been with him every step of the road. there was no way he couldn't love you. you didn't want to leave. you didn't want to stop coming to see him. so you didn't stop. you weren't going to leave. you sunk down onto the concrete in front of his door.
on the other side eren was doing the same thing, just sitting against the door. he didn't want to see you. he didn't want to give into you. if he hurt you now he wouldn't hurt you in 365 days. but seeing your face was so hard. he never wanted to scream at you and slam the door in your face. right when you showed up the only thing he wanted to do was pull you into his arms. he wanted to feel your warmth. but he can't. he knew you were like a drug, he couldn't get enough. he also knew that he could never be with you again. no. not after 365 days. he could never give you a family, the life you deserved. his biggest mistake was falling in love with you. it was impossible to give you everything he wanted to. he never even knew when it happened. when you walked with him in the snow during training? when you saved him countless times? your soft, sweet smile? he needed you, but you didn't need him.
you ended up falling asleep on eren’s front porch, waking up the next morning from the bright sun shining directly onto your face. and the blonde boy standing in front of you.
“so he won't talk to you either hm? you should go, you don't deserve that y/n. he hasn't talked to anyone in days, im just leaving a bag for him to make sure he's taking care of himself and all.” 
you nodded and stood up, walking down the step on eren’s porch. 
“the captain wants to see you too. i think he wants you and jean doing field work today.”
“thanks” you mumbled out before going to meet up with levi. 
armin was right, you and jean were out on the field today. jean secretly cared about you and he hated seeing you like this. the bright cheerful girl, now not saying a word. you lost the glow in your eyes. as the sun set, you and jean were about done. riding your horses back to the stables, jean took a turn.
“where are you going.”
“come on, y/n.”
sighing, you turned the direction of your horse, following jean.  
he stopped over the lake, the sun setting above you two.
“i used to come here with marco all the time.”
you looked up and over at jean.
“s-sorry, lets go.”
“wait jean.- i, i miss him too.”
“do you maybe wanna get dinner in town? we haven't ate in awhile and you seem very down today.”
“i don't know jean...”
“oh come on, my treat.”
knowing you couldn't go home and cook with eren like you used to do, you accepted his offer. 
279 days
the time for you and jean to do field work all day came around again. after, you found yourself in town with him again. over the past 86 days you found yourself going to eren’s less and less. after hanging out with jean all day for the first time, you realized that you both had a lot in common. jean lost someone and even though eren was still here, you lost him. you now only go there about once a week with armin, just to leave a bag with a note on his doorstep. he completely ghosted everyone. he hasn't talked to anyone in almost 100 days. you were the last person he spoke to. 
back to today, you found your smile slowly coming back. but were you over eren? no. not at all. jean just simply made you somewhat happy. out in town the both of you decided to try food from a bunch of carts. that was until you got to a small band playing music. jean pulled you close to him and started slowly swaying the both of you together. jean knew you were probably wishing he was eren, but that was ok with him. he had you in his arms.
what you didn't know, eren was sitting on a nearby bench. from a far, he was un recognizable. his hair draped over his shoulders and he hasn't shaved in months. he looked like shit. he questioned his decision of pushing everyone away. should he have spent the 365 days with you? no. no no no no no, he made the right choice. now he would just have to watch your life with jean. even though it hurt, it hurt like hell, this is what he wanted for you.
123 days 
wow, its been awhile since you've seen eren. you stopped going there. you didn't feel like need. its been way over 200 days. you had jean now. you were so close, yet so far to being over eren. but you didn't want to hurt jean by going to see your ex-lover. jean didn't bring up marco, you didn't bring up eren. you haven't had as much time with jean that you had with eren, but you were slowly falling in love with him.
just the little things.
4 days
letters. eren had written a letter to each and every one of his friends, but no. he only needed you to see yours. he ripped up the rest, but put yours into a plain white envelope, leaving it on his kitchen table. he needed to think about a lot of things in the next four days.
1 day 
eren took all his decorations down. all the pictures of you two that he's been looking at for the past 364 days. the only thing left was the letter, still set on his counter.
2 days after 
y/n. open in five years. i understand if you want to throw this out and forget about me, but give it a chance.
that's what you read on the envelope left on eren’s counter. 
you and close friends cleaned out eren’s house, collecting his personal belongings.  
saying the day was gloomy is being generous. the next few years were gloomy.
1825 days after
“marco kirstein! get back here right now or im getting your father.” 
you never imagined yourself chasing after a three year old toddler while your husband drank coffee on the balcony five years later. 
1826 days later
“have fun on your camping trip boys. connie loose my child when jean goes on that interview and ill kill you.”
“mommy stop worrying! uncle connie is a great babysitter!” 
6 hours later
you un crumpled the old envelope sitting in a box of belongings. 
hey sugar! so i see you didn't forget about me. if im right you have started a family? or that's what i hope at least...
those last 365 days were painful as all hell. sorry for bringing up old memories but i just want to clear things up with you. i lied the last time i saw you. i love you. i loved you so much. that's why i needed to let go. I've been watching you and jean over the past few months. you seem happy. stay that way please. i fucking cannot stand jean but please don't let go of him. if you're reading this and you did, i hope your children get/got your genes so they don't have horse faces. 
i don't even know why im writing this, i guess i just wanted to say i had to let go so you wouldn't get hurt once i died. i thought it would be less painful for you that way. im so sorry if i hurt you at first. so, so sorry. at least you had jean. someone, just like i wanted you too. 
im not sure if i regret my decision. actually scrap that i shouldn't have wrote that because i don't have an eraser. i don't regret it. but i just wanted to let you know that i loved you over those last 365 days. tell the gang i said hey.
i love you, my atlantis.
-eren
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Soulmate Au Part 4
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3 are here!!
Final formal installment from this series! Due to some personal reasons I will only do Hc's or small Drabbles and scenarios nothing explicit like these ones, just implied. I apologize if it's not what everyone wanted. Also thanks to everyone who has submitted a request, they will be answered. Enjoy!
WARNING SOMNOPHILIA
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Illumi stared down at your sleeping body, two dark voids swirling with anticipation. Today he had worked you up, purposely making you train and fight all day with him. Deep inside, he wanted you to be strong and willing to fight and kill just like they all were. But not enough for you to overcome them. That would mean your escape, and he couldn't allow that, not when they just found you.
It wasn't until you dodged him and stumbled to the ground that he noticed you were exhausted.
"We can stop for now." Illumi's monotone voice called out
He saw relief washed over you as your body unceremoniously melted into the grass, not caring the look he was giving you or that you were probably getting dirtier.
After that, you sloppily walked inside the house, dragging your tired legs straight to the bathroom. You took a quick shower, falling on the bed with the intention of resting your eyes, and then make dinner for the two fo you.
But Illumi waited for you, and he waited, and you didn't come out.
For a quick second, his heart skipped a beat, yet he walked calmly to the room. He knew whatever you do, wherever you go, they would find you.
They had already proved that.
What he saw melted his worry away. You were in your robe, wet hair splayed beneath you as you were sleeping without a care. Your mouth was slightly open, quiet snores coming out, and you hadn't even lighted the fireplace.
The corners of his lips twitched upwards, almost smiling at the picture. Neither Hisoka nor Chrollo were in the house, having left to do their own things for the trope. They had started to give you some more leniency and liberty after Chrollo saw you couldn't truly leave.
That headache could've certainly killed you, and you wouldn't try it again.
But now Illumi shook off his clothes, folding them and putting the bunch on the vanity. He loomed over your sleeping body, watching your chest rise and fall as you slept soundly. His face didn't emote any visible expression, but lust and excitement brew within him.
Illumi walked closer to you. He unfurled the knot and opened the robe exposing your naked body to the room. You were so perfectly positioned that the moonlight coming from the window in the dark room illuminated your breasts, making your skin glow. His mouth watered, looking at your perked tips, and he came to straddle your form. Dark eyes looked up to yours, watching to see if you woke up.
An excitement rose inside him, the thrill of making love to you while trying not to wake you.
And he couldn't wait any longer.
All that fighting from before, having you underneath him every time you lost, feeling how squirmed and struggled, it all made him very frustrated. He knew the others had already tasted you, delved deep within your depths. But now it was his turn, he had given you space, coddling you instead.
Illumi took one of your cherries into his mouth, excitement bubbling inside him, swirling his tongue around the bud while his other hand squeezed your other mound. His long hair over you tickled your side, and you sighed in your sleep, trying to move, but he didn't let you, of course, mouth still attaches to you nub, sucking and nipping it gently.
He started kissing down your stomach, leaving a wet trail of open-mouthed kisses, his long hair tickling you as he went.
Unaware of what was happening, your hips bucked into him, making him bite his lips to stifle the moan that wanted to escape. Illumi's face was poised in front of your core, his cool breath ghosted over the soft curls above your entrance. Your pink slit looked inviting, and he couldn't hold back anymore. He licked a stripe up your slit, making you sigh, body quivering as his hands held your thighs apart. His eyes looked up to see if you had awoken but found you still dreaming. Illumi then latched unto your hooded pearl sucking on it while two fingers already moving in and out, curled on that sweet spot that made your thighs twitch, almost closing around his head.
If only you could hear the obscene squelching of your wetness around his fingers, he was sure you would've been flustered and embarrassed.
You whined, squirming to escape his grasp, and he felt his length hardened at the fact that he alone was making you feel good. Possessiveness flooded his body, filling his mind with new possibilities.
The flood gates had opened, and he smiled up at you.
Your walls clamped down on his fingers, convulsing around them, your honey dripping down for him to lick up like a thirsty man on a hot day. Illumi held your waist down as he licked up your release, your body wriggling underneath his splayed palm on your stomach, wanting to escape the oversensitivity.
Eyes opened slightly groggily, staring up at the ceiling, your high washing over you and mixing with the exhaustion. You barely saw straight looking down to meet Illumi's dark eyes swirling with desire.
Illumi was straddling you, giving himself two shameless strokes and slowly plunging into your core. He sheathed himself inside you, grunting lowly at the warmth pulling him deeper.
"Illumi, what's go-" your soft voice slurred as his hips rocked against you, starting a furious speed.
You moaned, still sleepy but feeling how his fingers dug into your thighs, bringing you closer to him. The heat rising around you and the pleasure coming up your legs left you more sleepy. You could faintly feel his length speared you, hear his low grunts as your eyes closed once more. His hands went over your stomach, thinking, and imagining how your belly would swell. Imagining your body filled with his brood, drinking from one of your heavy breasts as they fed on the other. How proud he would be that you’re carrying his children, bred and marked to forever be his.
"Mmm, now this is a lovely sight~" Illumi felt Hisoka come up behind him, hugging his waist.
Hisoka laid his head on Illumi's shoulder, watching you sleepily writhe beneath his lover. He licked his lips, kissing Illumis neck softly.
"H-Hisoka," Illumi grunted, feeling your walls momentarily flutter around him.
"Mmm, don't mind me, my love." Hisoka continued to leave a trail of open-mouthed kisses on Illumi's neck, making the assassin close his eyes.
His hips didn't falter as he still rocked faster against you. He heard the soft scuffle behind him but didn't mind it lost in the sensations your body gave him.
Before his hand could grab one of your breasts, he felt Hisoka enter him from behind. He stuttered, clenching around the clown's length, causing him to moan loudly. Illumi leaned forwards down, supporting his body with his arms against the bed besides your head. His long dark hair fell down like curtains covering your face and his, encasing the two of you in a rather intimate display. One of his hands came down to caress your cheek, feeling the softness of your skin under his fingers.
"Now, where were we last time we were so rudely interrupted?~" Hisoka purred behind him, raking his nails softly down the assassin's back.
Illumi shuddered slightly, gripping the bed sheets with force, making them rip under his hand.
"A-Almost getting caught," Hisoka loved whenever Illumi couldn't talk or stuttered in his words. It filled his chest with pride.
"Mmm, I believe it's going to happen again" Hisoka moved his hips slightly, pushing harder Illumi inside you and closer over your body.
The bed creaked as he shifted, kissing Illumi's back and making him shudder in delight.
"How does she feel?~"
Hisoka kept leaving open-mouthed kisses on Illumi back everywhere his lips touched, his breath fanning over them, littering the assassin's pale skin with goosebumps.
"T-Tight," Illumi panted, feeling you clench around him.
You moaned in delight, your body littered a light sheen of sweat.
"What else, Llumi?~"
"She's w-warm and wet."
"So good," he muttered under his breath, but Hisoka caught it, and he chuckled, gripping Illumis hips harshly and giving him a rather hard thrust that pushed him deeper into your depths. You moaned in tandem with them.
"Ram into her, Llumi, make her yours too~," Hisoka whispered lowly, his own body preening in excitement.
"Breed her, and let’s keep her here forever" Hisoka's voice was deep and seductive as he pursued his release.
Illumi's face contorted into slight pain as he felt the pleasure rise in him. Hisoka went faster, feeling himself getting closer. He bit Illumi's shoulder, letting out a loud moan making Illumi feel it vibrate through him. Hisoka spilled inside Illumi but didn't move away.
He was still a bit hard to leave the fun.
"I know you want to...she wants it too~" Hisoka groaned against Illumis neck, and Illumi was consumed by his desire, frantically thrusting into you with passion.
The assassin groaned as your walls grew tighter, and you cried in out in your sleep.
Hisoka's hand went over the side to rub your bundle of nerves. Your body jerked, and Illumi grunted; he bit his lips trying to stay quiet, knowing if he let himself go, the clown would never stop teasing him. Then your walls convulsed around his length, your body arched, showing him your beautiful mounds. His eyes widened and then closed tightly, feeling you massage him, pulling him in. He panted, breathing out and feeling somber as your core pulled everything from him.
Illumi leaned back, his body coming close to Hisoka's chest. The clown smirked behind the assassin, and even if Illumi didn't see him, he could feel the smugness coming from him.
Hisoka wiggled his hips, pulling a soft moan from under Illumi's breath.
"I'll give you what you want as soon as I'm done here."
Hisoka chuckled, "or I can take it."
He rocked his hips gently against Illumi and then made him bend over, fully covering your body. His hand laid in the middle of Illumi's back as he pulled out and then went inside your already stuffed core. You gasped, opening your eyes wide, feeling the sudden push that left you breathless. You groaned at the fullness, clenching incredibly hard around the two of them. They moaned and groaned together. Your body squirmed underneath Illumi, and he kissed you to distract you as Hisoka started to move.
"Ah, ah-ha!" you moaned and whined out loud, feeling as Hisoka wildly dragged his length in and out.
Illumi breathed hard through his nose, grunting as he felt each and every of his lover's veins against his length. You panted and exhaled through your nose, looking flustered as Hisoka grabbed your hips and dug his fingers into them.
"T-Too much!" You whined, trying to arch your back, pushing your chest against Illumi.
He bit his lips, feeling your breasts flushed against him as you rubbed against the hardness of his abs. Your cheeks, like Illumi's, were tinted in red as he kissed you deeply, swirling his tongue against yours.
"I'm so close~" Hisoka moaned behind him.
Hisoka's tongue coming down to lick up Illumi's spine as his hips stuttered while you clamped down on them. You cried out against Illumi's kiss, and he pulls away to grunt at the fantastic feeling of your walls spasming around them and milking them both.
Hisoka pulled out, and Illumi let out a low gasp at the cold feeling of emptiness. He pulled Illumi against his chest, dragging the assassin with him as he laid down on the bed. The two of them panted harshly, eyes closed as the bliss washed over their bodies. Illumi lightly opened his eyes, looking at you, already passed out again.
He felt a twinge of disappointment inside his chest, but he pulled you closer to him, smothering you and trapping your body in his arms. You can’t leave them, you needed them. He took pride and relished in the fact that out of all of the three, he was the one who spent the most time with you.
Hisoka brushed Illumis dark long hair out of the way and leaned his head in the crook of his shoulder. He smiled at your passed out form and then kissed Illumi's neck as the assassin too was falling asleep. He hugged the two of you closer to him, Intertwining his legs with the both of you as he draped the sheets over all your bodies. He wondered what the next training session would be like and if he could join in the fun. Who knew his Llumi was this thirsty.
Morning came, and you weren't feeling exactly well-rested, you pinned it all to that weird wet dream fantasy you had during the night. But then you felt a heavy arm wrapped over your waist, holding you flushed against a hard chest. Everything was tender, especially in between your legs. The surrounding warmth felt nice, and your still exhausted body was being lulled back to sleep.
Maybe you were still dreaming even during the morning.
"Mmm, I'm ready for round two~."
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THANKS FOR ENJOYING THIS EVERYONE!
This is my last spicy Rose Tea of this caliber (explicitly detailed and character x character), due to some personal reasons I will not be doing extra mega super ultra explicitly detailed smut. Smut will happen but it will be more implied than anything and there will be no more character x character fics. I will focus more on x readers. I apologize if these teas are not everyone’s cup, I understand, but I’m doing it for me and I will still deliver amazing teas no matter what flavor they are!
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RESISTERE TENTATIONEM: CAPITULUM I
HELLION: A rowdy or mischievous person
Pairings: Damian Priest x Reader
Warnings: +18 explicit content
Editor: @thenightmareismyreality
Tag: @ziasaph , @theworldofotps , @alyhull , @bellalutionn , @aerynscrichton , @serpantscorpio8497 , @omegasshyghuleh6661ghosts , @squirreledelman , @lovinglerae , @sophiewolfheart-blog , @waywardwrestlewritingwaif , @sassymox
Notes: I’m so into this series that I even made moodboards 🤣 Don’t @ me 😂 I want to give a HUGE a thank you (and shout out) to @letsgivethisonemoreshot for helping me out with this entire trilogy! Thank you for your ideas and feedbacks, love ❤️ If you’d like to check out my previous works, you can find them on my Masterlist 😘
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“Miss Y/L/N” He greeted me “Sit down”
Father Damian was the school’s principal, and in the three short months since I transferred to this school, let’s just say I’ve spent a lot of time in a chair in his office
“Yes?” I faked a smile as I stared at him from the chair I was sitting on
“Can you explain to me what this is?” He showed me a piece of paper written ‘Satan rules! And fuck you, Principal Damian’ “And why was this taped to my car window?”
“I have no idea where that came from” I shrugged
“Miss Y/L/N, are we really gonna go down that path?” He pinched the bridge of his nose
“Why do you think that was me?” I pretended to be offended
“Because you’re the only student who has pulled stunts like this before”
“Maybe it was one of your perfect little students” I stood up and made my way towards his wooden desk and sat on top of it “You know, the ones who wear the pearl necklaces to show their purity” I laughed
“Miss Y/L/N, please refrain yourself from talking ill of the other students and return to your seat”
“Why? Because they’re pure, perfect and collected?” I slid across the desk and placed myself in front of him “Because they’re God’s children and I’m Satan’s spawn?”
“Miss Y/L/N” He warned
“Yes, Father?” I batted my lashes at him
“Ever since you stepped foot inside this school, you have done nothing but speak profanities, break the school’s dress code and make the lives of everyone in here a living Hell!”
“When have I spoken profanities?” I gasped, acting as if I was shocked
“You asked your classmate if you could caress her…. pussy!” He said through gritted teeth and I held back a chuckle
“And what’s wrong with that? She got a cat and I wanted to know if I could pet her”
“You asked another colleague if you could taste her melons!”
“She brought some with her for a snack and I love melons! Don’t you love them too, father?” I smirked
“What about the ‘BJ practice at 4pm behind the bleachers in gym’ sign you were caught hanging on the wall?” He crossed his arms in front of his chest
“What? BJ: Bible Jam, where we go over some hymns and try to set up a choir, since you don’t have one here”
“Is the choir for you ‘demonic pagan chants’ you love to recite in Latin to the other students?”
I just shrugged in response
He sighed “You’re turning nineteen years old next month, Miss Y/L/N! You’re an adult, so behave as such! The entire reason you were transferred here in the first place was because of your horrid habit of skipping classes, which caused you to repeat last year! How long do you plan on continuing that behaviour? Until you turn twenty years old, perhaps? My point is, how difficult is it to follow the rules? You can’t even follow a simple dress code, Miss Y/L/N!”
“That’s absurd!” I said with a huff “I follow the dress code impeccably!”
“By wearing revealing undergarments?”
“How do you know they're revealing if you're not looking, Father?” I smiled
“It’s a bit difficult to not see a red bra underneath a white shirt, Miss Y/L/N”
“So you do like melons then?” I laughed “Oh Father, is the Devil tempting you with the pleasures of the flesh?” I grinned evilly as I leaned towards him, revealing some of my cleavage
“You know perfectly well to not joke with unholy names, Miss Y/L/N” He gulped
“I love to swirl my tongue around the D word, Father” I whispered “Would you like me to show you how well it fits my mouth?”
“Miss Y/L/N, you have no idea what you’re getting yourself into”
“I’m talking about the Devil, Father Damian” I cackled “But I see you have another D on your mind”
“You shouldn’t mock the Devil, Miss Y/L/N. It’s not wise” He whispered, placing both of his hands on my sides and trapping me on the desk
“I’m not mocking, Father. I think he’s quite fun actually...don’t you?” I tilted my head to the side
“All that is forbidden is fun, Miss Y/L/N” His fingers brushed against my exposed thighs “It’s delightful to commit sinful actions”
I was caught off guard by his behavior, I never expected him to actually respond to my flirting
“What’s the matter, Y/N?” He chuckled “Devil got your tongue?”
“Maybe” He placed one hand underneath the hem of my skirt and stroked my inner thigh “He told you that I saw your red lace thong when you bent down to tie your shoes in the hallway this morning”
I gasped in shock and he continued
“The Devil knows our weaknesses so well, doesn’t he, Y/N? He knows that my weakness is a devilish little slut like you, and he knows that your weakness is a holy cock” He laughed
“Father Damian” I gasped
“What’s wrong, Y/N? Wouldn’t you like to commit a sin with me? A delicious, rough, sweaty and lustful sin?” He leaned forward until he was uncomfortably close to me
“Maybe I can turn you into a good little lamb once my cock is buried deep inside your pussy” He nibbled my bottom lip “Would you like me to fuck the filthy whore out of you?”
“Father...I-“
“What is it, Y/N? Not so brave anymore, are we?” He chuckled “I thought you liked teasing, isn’t that what you’ve been doing with me for the past three months? Teasing me non stop with your bratty attitude and smart mouth? Do you think I’m dumb? That I don’t see your true intentions?”
“I-“
“No no no” He placed two fingers on my lips and whispered “Don’t speak” Father Damian turned around and grabbed a Bible from his bookshelf
“Do you know what the punishment is for the lustful people in Hell, Y/N?” He turned around and looked at me in the eyes while placing the Bible on top of his table
I nodded in response
“Enlighten me, then” He grinned
“Those who commit the sin of lust will be punished in Hell by being smothered in fire and brimstone, Father”
“Good girl” He smiled “I see you paid attention to your biblical studies class” He said in a mocking tone
“Don’t you think that sounds so appealing?” He asked, tilting his head to the side and reaching for the Bible
“No, I don’t” I whispered
“Yes, it is. Want me to show you how appealing it can be?” He smirked, opening the Bible
To my surprise it was a hollowed out Bible, inside of it there was a slim vibrator and a bottle of lube
“Why do you have-“
“Yes or no, Y/N?”
“Yes” It slipped out of my mouth so easily
He smirked and reached his hands underneath my skirt, soon after the sound of cloth being torn apart filled up the room. Father Damian kept his gaze locked with mine as he brought my ripped thong to his lips, his tongue darting out and licking the piece of fabric
“Sinners always taste so sweet, don’t they?” He chuckled
Grabbing the lube, he squirted some on his fingers and spread it through my folds, the cold feeling was soon replaced by a warm feeling I never felt before. He added some more lube to his digit and slid his finger in me
“Oh my God” I moaned at the warmth that filled me
He reached for the vibrator and turned it on, sliding the cold toy against my warm bundle of nerves
“Fuck” I shuddered at the pleasurable feeling
“Repeat the punishment for me, Y/N” He smirked
“Being smothered” I started and his free hand wrapped around my throat
“And?” He grinned evilly
“Fire” I whispered, as he squirted more lube directly onto my folds this time
“So much fire” He smirked, replacing his finger with the toy at the same time his grip around my neck closed
I moaned softly as all of the different sensations hit me
“Oh there she is!” He laughed “The sinful little whore” And sucked on my bottom lip “You love to come out and play, don’t you my sweet harlot?”
I just nodded softly
“I’ll give you something even nicer for you to play with, how does that sound to you?”
“Anything, just please” I pleaded
He smiled widely, like a predator. In my foggy haze of pleasure I hadn’t even realized what he meant by that
“Father, please” I moaned
He smiled at my pleading “Oh my dear Y/N, isn't it a real joy to be a sinner?”
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Death By Bagel
NCT Culinary Student!Mark Lee x Fashion Design Student!Reader Summary: Mark makes a cake cause he's realized he can't lose you to some f-boy. Word Count: 3k+ Warnings: Fluff, childhood au, college au, slowish burn, slight cursing, reallllly fluffy, some broksi-dude action, typos sksksksks, etc.
R E Q U E S T my friend: mark lee, slow burn, friends to lovers
A/N: I wrote a fic that already had like 1k+ word then I LOST IT (i think i deleted it) thus this. It took me 10 years to write this msmsmkskskks. PLEASE TUMBLR IS MESSING WITH ME AND MIXED UP THE ORDER OF SOME OF THE DIALOGUE
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“As a doctor, I don’t think you should be doing that,” Mark says, not even bothering to look at his patient seated rudely on the floor. Oop, he’s lying down now.
Mark huffs and looks up from the clay block he was molding on his tray, “YOU’RE SO UNPROFESSIONAL!”
Mark’s mother nearly spits out her coffee upon hearing the words of his five-year-old son. Her husband snorts, “He got that from you.”
The woman throws a look at the man and was supposed to give a snarky retort, up until the sound of the doorbell ringing. She grins from ear-to-ear and dashes to get the door.
When she comes back to the living room, she’s accompanies by another woman and a tiny version of her.
“Markie! Say hello to your Auntie!” Mark’s mom calls.
Mark from the carpeted floor looks up and blinks, examining the stranger-woman and its human-ling. Mark turns to his father who was sat on the couch and receives a nod of approval almost. Mark purses his lips and waves at the woman.
The woman waves back and then crouches down to the little girl, “Baby, say hello to Mark.”
Unwilling, she shakes her head.
“Aw come on, baby. Don’t be shy. Mark over there is a really sweet boy. I knew him when he was in his mommy’s tummy, just like Mark’s mom knew you when you were in mine. You’re the same age so you’ll get along just fine.”
With the unnecessary explanation that gave no justification to the scene whatsoever out of the way, the girl was fooled into peeping up, “Hi, Mark.”
“Hello,” Mark says, not particularly interested, as his patient was still in the midst of dying in his office. He turned to his stuffed toy called Mr. Lion and attempted to stand him up once more.
At this point, the girl makes her way to Mark.
“We’ll be back in two hours, honey. Keep an eye on the children,” Mrs. Lee tells his husband who had been occupied with TV the entire time.
“Yeah. I got this,” he smiles to his wife then goes back to watching.
The bumble bee clad figure sat down to Mark in blue and watched him play.
Mark ignored her for a few seconds, needing to assert all efforts on standing that dumb toy up. Once successful, Mark turns to her, “Do you play doctors?”
Mark was then met with the same lack on enthusiasm. She hums, “I like playing baker doctor.”
All at once, Mark gasps, “ME TOO!”
It was unbeknownst to the children it was oddly specific and the chance of this happening was pretty slim.
And in a blink of an eye, excited giggles erupt in the room, as if they had been having so much fun before this scene. It was here and there the two would become best friends to the very end.
... so I guess it means the reckoning is upon us.
“MARK LEE I SWEAR TO THE FU--” “WHAT! WHAT!?” Mark laughs.
"YOU ATE MY BAGEL! AGAIN!" I growl in a loud whisper, throwing the wrapper at him and his flat head before he could think to dodge it while he annoyingly laughs.
"I asked if I could have it though!" he says, fully knowing his sins.
I glared at him and say lowly, "I thought you were referring to my notes, bread for brains."
Mark snorts loud enough for our teacher to wake up from his nap. Once the class notices, we all pretend to be doing something productive and Mark plays it off with a cough.
"Mr. Lee." Mr. Kim says sternly, clicking his tongue, blinking his eyes rapidly.
Mark finishes coughing and turns to our seated professor, "Yes sir."
"Don't go to school if you're sick and going to cause a racket with your coughing."
Mark nods firmly and Mr. Kim closes his eyes again, mumbling, "page 65 is due tomorrow."
The entire class grumbles. Mark beside me scoffs and makes a face, "Yeah, yeah, Doyoung."
I turn to him and elbow his side.
"Whatever," Mark shakes his head, "professor bunny-teeth won't hear me."
Once class ended, we both get our things and head out for lunch. We walk to our canteen, fussing over assignments, deciding we should do it together later in our mutually free period.
I groan and narow your eyes at him as we have an argument over how he hasn't finished the essay for English, "That's not the point."
"Yo Mark!" a voice calls from afar. Mark and I turn, looking for the voice, and I spot the dimpled senior, Jung Jaehyun, in a table with the rest of his squad.
I nudge Mark and point at the pale guy seated by the corner.
Mark throws him a smile and waves. I follow closely behind him as he walks over to the table. "We're going to sit with them?" I say in some sort of gasp.
"Yeah." Mark replies simply, not bothering to turn to me, "they're cool."
I knit my brows at that and nod, "Yeah I know. But I'm not cute today."
Mark stops in his tracks and throws me a confused look, "what?"
"I didn't put any make-up on today, also I'm pretty sure there's a visible stain somewhere on my jacket, I just don't remember where."
Mark scrunches his face up again, even more confused. "What? How do you... forget a stai-- that's not the point. Why do you wanna look cute today?" He scoffs and continues lowly, "hardly as if you ever look cute."
I let out an annoyed groan and punch Mark's shoulder. "Like when you panicked when Seulgi came over and asked for notes."
Mark openes his mouth, "That is so not the same! Jaehyun's a fuck bo-"
"Just shut up already," I snap and shove him forward so he'd continue walking. "Let's not keep him waiting," I add and mumble, "also I know. Dong Sicheng however is very cute."
Mark chuckles, "he's dated every girl on the dance team."
"Okay, maybe not that cute."
"Ya, Mark," Jaehyun grins and greets the said person with a high-five and chest bump. He turns to me and speaks my name with a smile. I smile back politely and wave.
I'm about to sit next to Sicheng, but Mark shoves me and so I end up sitting on the other side of the bench table with Jaehyun. I turn to Jaehyun with a small, non-awkward smile and shoot Mark a glare. He seems unbothered though.
"So, you up for a round later?" Jaehyun asks Mark.
Mark talks over me, "you know it, dude."
Jaehyun flashes his dimple smile all the stupid girls fall for. I'm only half falling for it cause I'm only half stupid. He raises his brows, "you bought the dough, right?"
This makes me knit my brows.
"Yeah, yeah, yeah. I really did this time," Mark mumbles quickly. "It's my turn anyway."
Jaehyun gives an off look, "that's literally what you said last time bro."
"Yo, no for real. It's in my bag, if you wanna check."
Jaehyun shakes his head when Mark begins to scramble for it, "no, Lee, it's good. We wouldn't want you friend to get dirty."
Is it just me or do you feel slimey all of a sudden?
Jaehyun then gives me a somewhat, somehow sincere smile, "so. I hear you're in fashion design."
I give a soft chuckle, "yeah. That's me."
"I could tell from a mile away. Mark looks horrible next to your getup."
I look down at my sweater and ripped jeans. Mark exclaims in protest, "shut the hell up, Jae."
I give a soft smile at Jaehyun, "don't know where that comes from but thanks I guess."
Jaehyun chuckles, "I'm kidding," he eyes Mark, "I saw your Fashion Design pin on your bag when you sat down."
"Oooohhhh, haha, okay, that makes sense."
"Ya, Jeff," Sicheng calls for Jaehyun, "it's almost time."
Jaehyun turns to his friend and nods. He turns back to me and Mark, "well, it's nice to meet you. Mark won't put a sock in it even if I beg. See you around, fashionista."
He stands and slaps Mark's back, "see ya later, broski."
"Yeah, bruh," Mark replies.
Once it's just Mark and I, I snap at him and blurt out in a whisper yell, "YOU'RE ON BROSKI LEVEL WITH JUNG JAEHYUN?!"
Mark gives me a weird face, "bruh, I think he calls the principal broski, for real."
I smack Mark, making him whine, "you know what I'm talking about, Mark! And what, are you doing drugs?!?"
He shakes his head in confusion, "Wait, what!? Who the hell told you that?"
"Uhhhhh you were talking about dough and showing up later. Sounds like you owe him money for drugs, Mark."
"??? In what universe did we even mention drugs?? Does this," he slaps his face, "look like a face of a drug addict to you?"
"A gullible idiot maybe."
Mark's jaw drops, "oh wow, okay. I'm done with this conversation." He proceeds to stand attempt to walk away. I scoff, "not on my watch bitch."
Like the true idiot that he is, Mark begins to legit run away from me, like a criminal who stole my cookies. It's embarrassing that he, a man much taller than I, could not even outrun me. I suppose I should be grateful, but this just fortifies my thoughts of him being an idiot even more.
But okay... I wasn't actually expecting this... like... Mark and Jaehyun... like... actually baking bread after school with dough Mark premade at home. Also, uh, Jaehyun looks super cute in an apron that I'm having a mental breakdown. And what's new, so does Mark.
"I can't believe you thought I was a drug dealer," Jaehyun says in a soft pout as he rolls out dough on the marble counter of his friggin large kitchen in his friggin large house. Like dang, I knew he was rich, but he's like Rich™ Rich. Rich with a golden diamond encrusted Rolex watch rich that's in a glass display rich-- wtf.
Mark wheezes in his telltale high pitched laugh as he opens a pack of unsweetened chocolate pellets, "she thought dough was some sort of metaphor or something."
"Cute," they say at the same time. Mark turns to Jaehyun in slight surprise and Jaehyun turns to me. I roll my eyes, though I feel my neck burn. I avert my attention to the scene I was sketching on my pad, Jaehyun and Mark baking croissants. I clear my throat, "I'm just making use of the single braincell between us, cause if he doesn't die falling down the stairs, he's gonna pull some idiotic stuff like baking with Jung Jaehyun."
Oddly, it's Mark that reacts to that with a, "hey!"
Jaehyun rubs his chin on his shoulder, "I also can't believe you think so little of me.'
I break a sweat but decide to answer honestly, "... ... ... You have a reputation."
"Of being a fuck boy?"
Mark loudly transfers the chocolates into a metal bowl, making the two of us snap at him. Mark makes a face, "oh gosh, sorry."
Jaehyun sighs, "well. I admit I get around, but that's only because I get dumped every time."
I raise a brow.
Jaehyun purses his lips, "nah, let's not make this weird. The croissants will be flat."
"Dude," Mark turns to him, "that's literally only because you messed up the recipe."
Jaehyun grits his teeth, "no. It's because Kun's a little teacher's pet and sabotaged me so he could get the best grade."
"No, but like Kun is really nice, he helped me with the fold techinique."
Jaehyun scoffs, "He stole me vanilla extract, Mark. Who does that?!"
"No, listen, he's cool, like, for real--"
"No, you listen, he's a little shit and--"
The two begin to bicker like a married couple, and I begin to draw inspiration form the scene to design some random sketches of wedding dresses.
I look back to the two and still can't get over the fact that I learned Jaehyun was a culinary arts major with my best friend, and that I was currently in the Jung's boojie home because I thought Mark was buying drugs from him. Not what I was expecting at all my day to go like, but I'm not mad this is how it went.
"No, no, no, no," Jaehyun says. He turns to me and points, "let's just get an outside opinion. Babe, what's your favorite color?"
"BABE?!" Mark barks.
I take a moment to reply. I blink slowly, "uhh... pink?"
Jaehyun bites his lower lip and claps his flour covered hands, "Right. Pink croissants it is."
Mark shoots him a glare and turns to me, back to Jaehyun, "she has a name."
Jaehyun nods, "yeah, and she wants pink croissants."
Mark makes a face and Jaehyun examines it, chuckling under his breath. "Wah, you two are something, huh."
No one really responds.
We began to always eat lunch with Jaehyun and his friends. It's funny cause I realized Jaehyun, although I still firmly believed he was out to get nasty with every other girl he sees, he was actually just like Mark. A total loser with a love for cooking.
"Hey," Mark says with a snippy tone.
I give him a look and suddenly receive a paper bag to my face. Mark sits on his chair next to me, as per usual. I smell the thing before I realize what it is. It's a freshly baked bagel. I perk up and smile, "Aw, you baked me a bagel?"
Mark raises his upper lip, "no. Jaehyun did."
I knit my brows, "what? Why?"
Mark narrows his brows, "do you, like, like him?"
I give him a look. I take a bite of the bagel, making Mark look at me in disbelief. I answer, "You do know I only hang with him cause you do, right?"
"Then why'd you eat the bagel then?"
"Uh, a number of reasons. 1) it's a bagel, 2) free food, 3) I'm starving, 4) it smells amazingggg."
Mark does a face, "fair. I've been meaning to ask how he does his seasoning for a while now too." He releases a breath, "and anyway, I'm pretty sure he made a bagel cause I told him you liked them. Never talking about you to him anymore though."
I look at him, "why do you talk about me so much to him anyway?"
"Uh because you're amazing," Mark says instinctively.
I feel my heart skip at that. I coo and place my hands on my chest, "wait that's really sweet."
Mark looks at me. His face begin to shift, "too bad it's a lie- haha."
I give him a look and rebut, "jerk."
"Loser."
As quickly as I found out about Jaehyun being Mark's friend, that's about as quickly as I found out he didn't like hanging out with him anymore. It's kind of a shame I never got to go back to his boojie house.
There was this one encounter I had with Jaehyun though... which was a little weird, not gonna lie.
He was waiting for me outside my Tailoring class, smiling and waving when he saw me. I Reluctantly reciprocated and walked over to him.
He releases a breath, "I've been waiting for about 20 minutes for you. I didn't know when your class would end."
I raise my brows, "you could have asked?"
"Well I would need your number for that, and that would have ruined the surprise," he pulled out a brown paper bag, reminiscing the same one Mark chucked at my face.
"I made you two this time," he smiles.
I take a moment to reply, "you don't have to make me bagels, Jaehyun."
He grabs my hand, "yeah, but I want something out of ya," he places the bagels in my hand. He proceeds to lead us off and we begin to walk down the hall.
Truth be told, it's a little scary that his ulterior motive is up in the air. Jaehyun places his hands in his pockets, "I like your dress, by the way."
I smile, "thanks. I made it."
He smiles and nods, "right. That makes sense as to why it suits you well."
I can't help but blush at that, and simultaneously feel conscious when I realize a bunch of girls in my course are looking at me and Jaehyun as we strut down the hall.
"So, what did you want, Jaehyun?"
"Well, I clearly wanted to ask you out."
"..."
"..."
Jaehyun smiles and give a soft laugh, "is it so ground breaking?"
"... Uh..."
He sniggers, "hey, you can say no. I mean I hope you don't but you can." Jaehyun leans in and raises his hands, "I won't like it, but a man should take rejection from a lady well."
I turn to him as he straightens up. I turn to the bagels he made me and bring it back to him. He laughs, "no, I made them for you really. It's not poisoned, in fact it's made with love."
I visibly react to that, which makes Jaehyun wheeze. I can't help but laugh back, "that was hella tacky."
"Worth a shot though," he says. "Good luck with Mark."
I look at him with silence and he chuckles, "ya, you can't fool me."
I'm about to retort but then Jaehyun gets called by one of the frats dudes I identify as Johnny Seo. Jaehyun does a curtsy and clicks his tongue, "see ya later babez."
"You know, I would have said yes if you didn't do stuff like that."
Jaehyun purses his lips, "no you wouldn't."
I shrug, "worth a shot though."
Jaehyun places a hand on his chest, dramatically calling, "Uh, rejection hurts, man."
Yeah, I never went to Jaehyun's boojie house ever again.
Silver lining though was Mark's dorm smelled equally as nice because of all the food he cooks, although it came with a whiff of axe body spray from his roommate, Lucas. It's cool though, he was almost never around for me to smell it in its whole intensity.
"Aite," Mark calls from his side of the dorm. I perk up from the two seater dining table they had and turn to Mark who was covering the cake he was making for his finals.
"Don't, like, peek, okay. I want you to see the cake all at once and give me your honest reaction to it. Please, like, all my lives kinda depend on it."
"How many lives do you have?"
"9, I'm pretty sure."
I stand from my seat, "not you faking your life as a cat, but get it I guess."
Mark raises a hand at me as I walk over, "can you not, I'm high-key panicking right now."
"Over what? You literally made a box of donuts for your midterms and it looked better than Misty Mreme! I'm sure your cake is hot."
"It was in the minifridge for a day. I mean it barely fit cause of all of Lucas' mountain dew."
I groan, "just show me it, Mark Lee!"
Mark whined and dashes over to me, grabbing my shoulders, "okay, but like, don't be mean about it. I swear, I might cry."
I give a sound and fake cough, "it's ugly."
Mark doesn't respond to that particular jab, "I'm serioussss. Please be kind, okay?"
I look at Mark's nervous face and give a soft pout, "Markie, please, not that I think it would be ugly, but I promise you don't have to be nervous about my reaction."
He isn't soothed by that, but he does release a sigh, "okay. So for context, Mr. Moon wanted the cake to be one or two tiers, but I went with one, cause there aint no way I'm going to the other side of the campus to freeze a two tiered cake. Then, the theme was something from your childhood, so, I, uh, thought this was fitting. The exam is 60 percent decoration, 40 percent taste by the way."
Mark gives me a hesitant look, but steps way for me to see it. I then see a heart shaped, medium sized cake in my favorite pastel pink color. By the top there's a little boy on the floor playing with a toy oven set and little girl in a bumble bee dress, holding a stethoscope. At the bottom of the cake, there were jelly letters spelling out, "I like you."
I cup my cheeks at the sight of it and feel my eyes start to well at the sentiment.
Wait... was this really happening?
Mark heaves in and out, "okay, so like when Jaehyun began to like hit on you, that sucked pretty hard because he's known for getting girls and I thought maybe he'd get you too and I got panicky. Anyway, I....... have liked you since we were kids... And... I know you probably don't feel the same way but I have to try, you know.... Yolo."
My feel my tears retract from what I hear. I rub my eyes. I turn to Mark and find his nervous face. "Did you just say yolo in your confession, Mark?"
He looks like he's about to throw up.
I can't help but chuckle and pout, "dude..."
I prolong the moment. Mark gets even more nervous as he repeats softly, "dude..."
"We could have dated in grade school all this time."
It takes a moment to register in his head.
Like, a really long moment.
I sigh, "Mark! I like you too, dummy."
He freezes and blinks. His face begins to burn. He breaks into a soft smile, "nice."
I break into a laugh.
"... Uh... So... Can I like... Kiss you?"
I snort and feel my own cheeks begin to burn, "I think you should refrigerate your cake first."
Mark snaps out of this trance, "oh shoot, you-" I give him a quick peck on the lips.
He is dumbfounded.
I feel butterflies go wild in my stomach.
"I'll wait over there for when you've fixed that."
Mark watches as I walk away, "yooo.... That's not fair though."
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mshomestyle · 3 years
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Hi just saw ( sorry can’t spell ) your ask for dad post and i’m a sucker for dad hawks, I was wondering if you could wright Single!Dad!Hawks, ( his old s/o died :’( ) and one dad hawks is out with his son and he’s freaking out scared that someone kidnapped s/n but he gets a tap on the shoulder and sees a cute girl holding his son. And they end seeing each other a lot and s/n likes y/n a lot as well?? sorry that this was Confusing confusing to read this is my first ask! thx for reading
Funny you should mention that because I can’t spell either! I legit was talking about that to someone last night, too. I love your idea, though! <3
Single Dad Hawks x Reader [Head Canons]:
-It had been about two years since Hawks’s significant other had passed away, and as he watched his son toddling about the living room, Hawks couldn’t help but to think about that.
-Being a single dad had been much harder than he thought it would be, especially since it started a week after his son was born.
-He had to navigate taking care of a child all on his own, and his over-protectiveness didn’t exactly help the situation either.
-On this particular day, Keigo was in a shoe store with his little tot, who could not stop staring and cooing at the children’s play area from his stroller.
-”Daada, pwease!” his son pleaded. Even at such a young age, he could talk pretty well and toddle about on his legs without too much of a problem.
-”No, I don’t need you getting lost. Now let’s get you some new shoes.”
-The baby boy pouted and crossed his arms at this injustice. He had a plan however...
-Hawks would love to let his child go and play, but now wasn’t the time and he wasn’t about to let him be alone. There were all sorts of villains and kidnappers about, and being a hero let Hawks know the worst of it.
-With that in mind, Hawks picked up a shoe he figured his son might like and turned to show it to him...Only he was not there.
-Quickly, and while slightly panicking, Hawks went into full hero mode sending his feathers out to try and find his son, because he would be damned if he let someone kidnap his baby boy! The balls on that person for going after the number two hero’s son, because when he found them, he was going to rip their-
-”Um, excuse me?” There went a tap on his shoulder.
-The voice catching his attention was soft and sweet. Quickly Hawks turned to the source to see a beautiful woman gently holding his son.
-It was you.
-”I’m sorry, but is this sweet little boy yours?” you asked with a kind smile, you gave the baby a light tickle, which caused him to giggle and hold onto you tighter.
-Keigo was so surprised. His son usually didn’t take too kindly to strangers, which he no doubt learned from his daddy.
-”U-Uh, umm, yes, he is,” Keigo nodded quickly as he reached over to grab his son. The baby boy, however whined and held on tighter to you.
-”Pway...,” he said. You couldn’t help but to giggle.
-”Sorry, I played a quick game with him while we went to find you,” you admitted, “Just pointing out different colors and shapes, nothing special.” Hawks was caught off guard by you. You seemed so calm, cool, and collected, yet so sweet.
-”No, that’s alright,” he said, “Um, I’m Hawks, by the way.”
-It seemed as if the hero still had it as he managed to secure your phone number and after that a date with you.
-There was just something about you that he wanted to figure out. The way you lit up a room without noticing, and the way that you were just so yourself without skipping a beat. Hawks loved it so much, but more importantly, his son absolutely adored you.
-You came up with the funnest and safest games that a kid and his parent could only dream of.
-Say the baby boy wanted to play at the park across the street, but the three of you were busy with an errand. Well, you managed to come up with a fun game that absolutely distracted the little tot in question.
-”Now let’s see if we can find any blue hats in this area, alright? If you spot one before me you win!” Of course you would let the baby win.
-”Dhere’s one! I win!”
-”Good job, baby boy!” you gushed, and as you held onto his tiny hands in celebration, Keigo watched you with such admiration.
-It was only a matter of time before you took your relationship to the next level, and you found yourself moving in with the two. Of course, since there was a child involved, a lot of serious conversations had to be held, and at the end of an important one, you decided that if your relationship went down the marriage route, you’d become the child’s mother and let him refer to you as such.
-So, when Hawks finally proposed and you said ‘yes’, Keigo felt as if he had to thank his son for finding you.
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