falling in love.
there aren't many people I come across who impress me. a few of them do amuse me.
amusement may spark an interest. but it takes so much more to brew love.
tonight I don't yearn to be loved. tonight I crave the feeling of falling in love. there wasn't much I knew when I was eighteen, but I knew one thing right- you cannot fall in love, the true kind of love, if in that equation you are not loved back.
love is energy. that energy is an exchange. it is not one sided.
and tonight that's the love I seek. the man I will fall in love with. whose existence will make my heart happy, my soul calm, and my mind elated.
yes, that's what I look up to. just falling in love.
its equal in its presence, in its intensity, in its gentleness. even though its one- sided, I wish for it to stay. watching him from distance, his eyes were blue as bilberries, nature was calm as virtue, aura hushed as midnight, and a face innocent as grace itself. how can even a soul like him exist?
I've felt the spark one too many times but it always flickered too soon- either extinguished if I was lucky or charred everything around me if I was not.
when did the spark get to evolve fully? never, not once.
but maybe now I know how to keep the spark evolved. by being the only one in love. no complains, no demands. the love I have isn't shared but just belongs to me. I can dream of anything, hope for anything and all of it belongs to me.
it might seem as if I'm running away, and avoiding his presence, but I really am. its the fluttering of heart, the goosebumps and a weird sensation deep inside my heart from which I'm trying to escape.
he may be the reason why I've started to smile again, and why not? his smile so contagious that I wish everyone had immunity, except me. but he is even the reason why my heart aches. and that's equally hurting.
so maybe I would gradually learn to live with it until I see him happy with someone else. or until I completely get over him, knowing that he deserves more. but there's one thing which I would still keep on humming inside my heart and I know I'm nobody to say this.
but don't fall for someone else.
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To be undeniably chosen every single time is the purest meaning of love. To know that in every second and every mood it will always be you is nothing short of romance. Lust, yearn, and ache for only me, with an unreasonable thirst that only my touch can satisfy. Choose me.
— The Chronicles of Common Sense
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