#regina mills text post meme | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ethyreal · 2 years

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#ethyreal, private and mutually exclusive multi-muse. highly selective and low-active. also found at mahdena, avoleuse, nytingale. by reign. she/her. 26. rules + muses below cut.

muses. plot call. meme call. starter call. memes.

01. basic rules apply. don’t godmod. don’t steal. don’t force-ship. don’t auto-ship. yada yada yada. standard dni. no white/dark-washed characters, no gender-bent characters, “problematic” faceclaims will be judged on a case-by-case basis. i don’t follow anime characters. i rarely follow game characters. i soft-block non-mutuals, anyone i do not interact with ic or ooc after a period of time or anyone who vague-blogs excessively. i don’t owe you an explanation or a reason why. hate/anons will be addressed unless name dropping occurs. if you support discrimination of any kind, dni. please always specify your character preference on any memes or starter calls unless previously discussed. minors dni.

02. this blog is private and mutually exclusive. i will only interact with mutuals. i only follow friends/people i know. i do not follow first. some exceptions notwithstanding. if i do not follow back within twenty-four hours of my being online here, i will soft-block you. i am not always active here as this multi is not my priority. i love all kinds of relationship dynamics : romantic, casual, platonic, familial, antagonistic. i love extensive plotting. i will use memes as inspiration for starters, or consider meme replies as a starter.

03. i write in second perspective. i use small text with sporadic bolds, italics, hyperlinks and regular text as emphasis. i tend to write multi-para and will rarely engage in one-liners. i primarily use icons but i will use gifs if my partner uses them. i will only write iconless if replying to an iconless thread. i am of legal age. i will write nsfw content of a sexual or triggering manner. everything will be tagged with trigger cw. graphics, icons and gifs posted/used here were made by me or for me. the psd i use is custom commissioned by venuscommissions.

04. while i am duplicate friendly there are some characters that i am especially attached to or have developed significantly over time that i do not comfortable interacting with as single-muse blogs or on multi’s. i will not follow single-muse blogs for these characters and multi-muse blogs will be on a case-by-case basis. these characters are :

regina mills, marvel’s thena, jane smith, aurora, tara carpenter, helen sharpe, melinda may, and martha jones.

important. i do not hold grudges. if we have had any problems in the past, i can assure you, i am over it. you are welcome to reach out but i will not do so myself. i am tired of maintaining relationships with people who will turn on me at the drop of a hat or with whom i feel i am on thin ice with.

this blog is anti-jkr and anti-smeyer

mains & exclusives, i will have up to three mains for any one character and only one exclusive. blog-wide mains applies to multi-muses. exclusives will need to be discussed but if we are mutuals, i am happy to add you as a main if you want it. a personal rule of mine is that exclusivity applies to both the character and the faceclaim they use. ship-partners are indicated with a 🤍 . . .

mains , ˊ › @weathrs as gale weathers for tara carpenter, by lisa. ˊ › @sunshiner as sam carpenter for tara carpenter, by tas. ˊ › @plnkladies as blog-wide mains, by isa. ˊ › @etyrheal as ajak, by bri. ˊ › @revyrie as blog-wide mains, by bri. ˊ › @nocturnais as bruce wayne for bella reál, cat grant & addison king, by kendall.

exclusive , ˊ › @vivrae as ruby lucas for regina mills & mal bertha for aurora, by astra + 🤍 ˊ › @plnkladies as laurie strode for tara carpenter, lou miller / tammy sinclair for minerva carlysle, janet addams for jane smith & tammy sinclair for louisa sinclair, by isa. ˊ › @revyrie as allison sawyer for hannah faber, by bri. ˊ › @conzierge as john smith for jane smith, by lyn + 🤍

#ˊ › pinned post ‚

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thatsdevilstears-a · 2 years

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/// GUIDELINES

——GENERAL

1. Hello there and welcome to my blog. Thank you for reading my guidelines! My name is Wiktoria, you can call me vikn. I live in Poland. As you can see, English is not my first language, therefore mistakes can occur, please bear that in mind.

I also have an interest tracker so you can fill it here.

2. I consider this blog independent and semi-selective, meaning, I prefer to write write with mutuals only. Memes, open starters are open to everyone, though. That doesn’t mean, though, it will carry on. I’m open to exploring, but I do not click with everyone. Please, don’t take it personally if that happens with you as well. Also, feel free to send me pms, asks and just say hi! I’m a friendly person that also knows all too well what anxiety means.

3. I’m not that fond of writing with OC characters and I don’t, most of the time.

8. When it comes to formatting - I keep it simple – small text + eventually icons.

4. I’d love to explore crossover stories. Examples? Relationship between Regina Mills & Damon Salvatore, Emma Swan & Theo Crain, no matter how crazy that may seem.

5. Speaking of... Even if I do not have characters from certain fandoms, doesn't mean I wouldn't like to write with character from them in crossovers. Movies and tv shows I can think of are: harry potter, lord of the rings, the vampire diaries, twilight, stranger things, why women kill, orange is the new black, sherlock, jessica jones, charmed, disney & pixar in general...

6. I am open to all kinds of nsfw; I often like to write all kinds of dramas, character deaths, horror, mental-illness issues, abusive relationships, heartbreak and heartache. +18 muns and muses only. I’ll tag such posts appropriately.

7. I do not possess icons for all my characters. Most of the icons I do use aren’t mine, but I’m trying to slowly make some myself.

——DOs AND DON’Ts

2. NoH8! If I see it, I’ll unfollow you asap.

1. No god-modding; I control my character, you control yours. There are examples where I give permission to do so, e.g. we discuss something in pms and plan things to turn out the specific way. In other cases… I may turn out not so nice.

4. Do not force a ship on me. I’m open to it, but I’d like you to discuss it with me first.

3. Personal blogs - do not follow me, nor like/reblog my posts! I’ll block you.

5. Of course, read all the rules! If I see you haven’t, there will be just one more chance to.

6. Please, try to match the length of the replies.

7. Also, please, cut your posts.

——SHIPPING

1. First and foremost, I ship chemistry! There are, though, ships I particularly don’t like - that’s why I always advance to message me about it first. If you’re shy, just send me an anon!

2. If you’re curious about my favourite ones, though, my two otps are swan queen [emma & regina] and masriel [marisa & asriel]. & when it comes to otps, i rarely ship those characters with anyone else -- if so that's with characters from another fandom (as i mentioned -- i love crossovers)

As for other ships I do support: dani & jaimie, serena & june, villanelle & eve, anne & gilbert, moiraine & lan [platonically but may try also go beyond ;)], moiraine & siuan, alice & luther, alison & cole, norma & romero, lizbon & sergio, nairobi & helsinki (in obvious way ;)).

I'm fairlyyy ok with: dragon queen (regina & maleficent), emma & lily, serena & fred (agnsttt), theo & trish, vanessa & ethan, melanie & ben, beth & benny.

3. If I were to write about all my characters’ sexual orientation, I’d take me forever. Which is why I want you to look at them as bisexual or pansexual [perhaps apart from those who are originally gay]. But it honestly depends on the story; I may ship those characters with either females or males. So even if we have such characters as Serena Joy or Lord Asriel, they can be gay or bi [openly or not], or straight. I like to play with that form in various stories.

4. When it comes to smut, rule number one: +20 muns and muses only. If you came here for this sort of entertainment, I’ll say look for it somewhere else. I’m ok with writing it - from time to time and when it feels right. It will be under a read more and tagged as ‘nsfw’. I feel like it may be fade to black most of the time, though.

/// MUSES

-------PRIMARY

>>>his dark materials (book & tv show based): marisa coulter // face: ruth wilson ; lyra belacqua // face: dafne keen ; lord asriel belacqua // face: james mcavoy.

>>>once upon a time: regina mills // face: lana parrilla ; emma swan // face: jennifer morrison.

>>>the wheel of time (for now tv show based): moiraine damodred // face: rosamund pike ; lan mandragoran /// face: daniel henney.

>>>snowpiercer: melanie cavill // face: jennifer connelly ; alexandra cavill // face: rowan blanchard.

>>>penny dreadful: vanessa ives // face: eva green.

>>>the queen’s gambit: beth harmon /// face: anya taylor-joy.

>>>the haunting series: theodora cran // face: kate siegel ; eleanor crain // face: victoria pedretti.

-------SECONDARY

>> the affair: alison bailey /// face: ruth wilson.

>>luther: alice morgan // face: ruth wilson.

>>anne with an e: anne shirley-cuthbert // face: amybeth mcnulty ; gilbert blythe // face: lucas jade zumann.

>>killing eve (tv show based): villanelle/oksana astankova // face: jodie comer.

>>the handmaid’s tale (tv show based): serena joy waterford // face: yvonne strahovski.

>>bates motel: norma bates /// face: vera farmiga.

>>the haunting series: jamie taylor // face: amelia eve / carla gugino ; dani clayton /// face: victoria pedretti ; olivia crain // face: carla gugino.

>>the oa: nina azarova/prairie johnson /// face: brit marling.

-------TEST

>his dark materials (book & tv show based): mary malone // face: simone kirby.

>killing eve (tv show based): eve polastri // face: sandra oh.

>bates motel: norman bates // face: freddie highmore.

>la casa de papel: nairobi // face: alma flores ; lizbon // face: itziar ituño ; el professor // face: álvaro morte.

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rebecca-weltons · 3 years

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Creator Tag Meme

Rules: It’s time to love yourselves! Choose your 5 (ish) favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. Tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!

Tagged by the incredible @indestinatus (who literally does it all gifs, fanfic, fanart you name it !! still in awe of your triple threat talent sofia) and the lovely @sweetsouldhavernas both who make such amazing ncis/tiva content and are literally over here keeping the fandom alive with all their amazing content definitely give them a follow 💞

So long story short I came back to tumblr this year after my blog was FINALLY unmarked explicit. So I started giffing again and learned so much and I feel like you can really see the improvement in my gifs which I love but these are my top 5 sets I made for the year, plus some honorable mentions 🤗

1. Lucifer Tarot Card gifset

This one took me forever because I colored the tarot card pngs as well as the gifs and then blended them together but god I love this set and I got so much positive feedback and love from people so this one is my definite favorite.

2. Deckerstar Parallel gifset

So this one doesn’t really have any special coloring or typography or anything it just honestly made my cry making it because god we all waited so long for chloe and lucifer to finally get together, and lucifer really has come so far and he cares about her so much and well yeah this one just makes me so emo 😭😭

3. Regina Mills gifset

I made this one for @dailytvwomen (shameless plug lol give us a follow!) and I wasn’t really feeling it when I first posted it but it got so much positive love and now looking back I actually love it lmao and it makes me miss giffing ouat

4. Lucifer Cinematography gifset

So I actually hated this one so much at first lol. I made it the weekend that lucifer came out and it just sat in my drafts for like 2 weeks til I finally was like screw it I’m just gonna post it, totally thinking it would flop. And it did for like a day or two. Then it actually started getting a good amount of notes and over time I’ve changed my mind on it and love it and am probably going to make it a series at some point and do every season. Anyways I just love how getting validation from your art along with a little space away from it can make you totally change your mind on it. (CONSTANT REMINDER TO SUPPORT CONTENT CREATORS AND REBLOG THINGS !!)

5. Lucifer Morningstar gifset

I made this one pretty early in my return to giffing so it isn’t perfect but I do really like my coloring (that top right gif 😍) and the color combo a lot and I just think lucifer looks so good in purple

A few honorable mentions

6. Lucifer + the 5 Love Languages

I had a fun time blending this and I’m so proud of that first gif plus the text post just fit lucifer so well

7. Halloween Charmed set

Purple and orange is one of my favorite color combos and I think my coloring here came out really good especially the first phoebe gif

8. Psych Yin Presents set

I also wasn’t so sure about this set at first but I think I had just worked on it too long and I feel like anything I stare at too long a start hating so now looking back this set’s coloring came out very nice and I’m super proud of that first and last gif

9. Caskett set

Really went wild with blending with this one lol and I just find it really funny I used a Michael Scott quote as some super serious romantic quote

Tagging: @bishmonts @mazykeen @seeleybooth @valenttine @bartonclinton @maziken

#ik some people have already done this but i can’t remember who so just ignore if you have lol #but yay this was fun!!#annalise for ts #tag games #me

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bellatrixobsessed1 · 7 years

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#regina mills #zelena mills #once upon a time #ouat #text post meme

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florida3exclamationpoints · 24 days

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Once Upon A Time as text posts

#once upon a time #ouat #regina mills #neal cassidy #henry mills #rumplestiltskin #emma swan #zelena mills #the dark one #gideon gold #text post meme #ouat text posts

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darling-dontforgetme · 4 years

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the whole list

I’m sorry that I took so long, and I’m so boring, but here you go!

1. coffee mugs, teacups, wine glasses, water bottles, or soda cans?

Coffee mugs

2. chocolate bars or lollipops?

Chocolate bars

3. bubblegum or cotton candy?

Eww, no to both.

4. how did your elementary school teachers describe you?

My mom worked at my elementary school, so I was very much a teacher’s pet.

5. do you prefer to drink soda from soda cans, soda bottles, plastic cups or glass cups?

Plastic cups

6. pastel, boho, tomboy, preppy, goth, grunge, formal or sportswear?

Pastel or boho

7. earbuds or headphones?

Earbuds

8. movies or tv shows?

I really want to say tv shows, but I’m awful at finishing them. I still need to watch the last few episodes of Apocalypse. Don’t at me.

9. favorite smell in the summer?

Is it weird if I say my cats? It’s weird, I know. They all have different smells, and it’s comforting to be around them when I’m stressed or upset.

10. game you were best at in p.e.?

Nothing, literally nothing. I was that kid who always had their nose in a book, so you can imagine how awkward I was in p.e.

11. what you have for breakfast on an average day?

A peanut butter and jelly sandwich or pancakes

12. name of your favorite playlist?

The only playlist I listen to is my own. I listen to a lot of country, some musicals, and a handful of older songs.

13. lanyard or key ring?

Lanyard

14. favorite non-chocolate candy?

Gummy bears

15. favorite book you read as a school assignment?

The Handmaid’s Tale

16. most comfortable position to sit in?

Why sit when you can lay down? I usually sit with my legs crossed.

17. most frequently worn pair of shoes?

My work pair of tennis shoes

18. ideal weather?

WINTER. All the cold.

19. sleeping position?

On my stomach

20. preferred place to write (i.e., in a note book, on your laptop, sketchpad, post-it notes, etc.)?

Laptop

21. obsession from childhood?

Books. I read so many books as a kid.

22. role model?

I don’t know. My therapist is pretty cool. Sarah Paulson maybe?

23. strange habits?

I eat soup with a fork. I have to put on my right sock and shoe before I can put on the left. I eat pop tarts upside down.

24. favorite crystal?

I don’t know. Rhodochrosites and amethysts are pretty.

25. first song you remember hearing?

Queen of the Silver Dollar

26. favorite activity to do in warm weather?

Stay inside, lol. I play a lot of animal crossing, try to write sometimes. Read.

27. favorite activity to do in cold weather?

Also, stay inside- still playing animal crossing and writing or reading.

28. five songs to describe you?

I honestly have no idea.

29. best way to bond with you?

Just hang out and talk with me. I like to stay home, or go on simple dates. I love, love, love aquariums.

30. places that you find sacred?

Churches, cemeteries

31. what outfit do you wear to kick ass and take names?

I’m not very confident in myself, so I tend to stick with t-shirts and shorts or leggings.

32. top five favorite vines?

I do not watch vine.

33. most used phrase in your phone?

Sorry or what’s for dinner

34. advertisements you have stuck in your head?

Those lawyer commercials that come on all of the time

35. average time you fall asleep?

Between 11:30 and 2:30

36. what is the first meme you remember ever seeing?

Probably something with SpongeBob

37. suitcase or duffel bag?

Duffel bag

38. lemonade or tea?

Tea

39. lemon cake or lemon meringue pie?

Hear me out, what about no lemon?

40. weirdest thing to ever happen at your school?

These kids started a metal band, and our administrators thought the student body loved it, so they got to perform a lot.

41. last person you texted?

@grilledcheeseandguavajelly

42. jacket pockets or pants pockets?

Pants pockets

43. hoodie, leather jacket, cardigan, jean jacket or bomber jacket?

Hoodie

44. favorite scent for soap?

Some sort of berry

45. which genre: sci-fi, fantasy or superhero?

Fantasy

46. most comfortable outfit to sleep in?

Shorts and a t-shirt (wasn’t kidding when I said I only wear shorts and a t-shirt)

47. favorite type of cheese?

American

48. if you were a fruit, what kind would you be?

@grilledcheeseandguavajelly says "something unique but sweet but with a lot of depth to it, so like a kiwi or a honeydew or a prickly pear.”

49. what saying or quote do you live by?

Do no harm, but take no shit

50. what made you laugh the hardest you ever have?

Probably something my sister has said or done

51. current stresses?

So much. I lost my job recently, and there's just a lot going on in my life right now.

52. favorite font?

Can I pick people’s handwriting as my favorite font? I know it’s dumb.

53. what is the current state of your hands?

Well, I should use more lotion

54. what did you learn from your first job?

That the whole world is going to expect you to know things without you actually ever being taught those things

55. favorite fairy tale?

The Little Mermaid?

56. favorite tradition?

Getting cake for birthdays because I love cake

57. the three biggest struggles you’ve overcome?

Me, myself, and I

58. four talents you’re proud of having?

Writing, caring for others. I don’t know.

59. if you were a video game character, what would your catchphrase be?

Don’t fuck up

60. if you were a character in an anime, what kind of anime would you want it to be?

I don’t really have any anime knowledge

61. favorite line you heard from a book/movie/tv show/etc.?

“You want to tell her that there are between two hundred and four hundred billion stars in the Milky Way, but when you look up, you could only ever see, like, twenty five hundred of them. You are one of the ones that no one can see. She is one of the ones that’s even visible in the city.”

-The Moment by T.C. Anderson

Guys, this is my favorite book. I highly recommend checking it out.

62. seven characters you relate to?

Alice Macray, Maura Isles, Temperance Brennan, Regina Mills, Callie Torres, Olivia Benson, Rachel Stevens

63. five songs that would play in your club?

She’s a Rainbow, Free To Be You and Me, Defying Gravity, Goodbye Earl, Queen of the Silver Dollar. My club would not be very cool.

64. favorite website from your childhood?

Webkinz

65. any permanent scars?

I cut the side of my thumb off with a pair of scissors once.

66. favorite flower(s)?

Zinnias, Passion flowers, sunflowers

67. good luck charms?

I don’t know that I have any?

68. worst flavor of any food or drink you’ve ever tried?

GRAPE

69. a fun fact that you don’t know how you learned?

I am so bad at thinking up answers on the spot. I’m sorry I suck at this.

70. left or right handed?

Right handed

71. least favorite pattern?

Any sort of animal pattern

72. worst subject?

Science

73. favorite weird flavor combo?

Peanut butter and chocolate on ritz crackers

74. at what pain level out of ten (1 through 10) do you have to be at before you take an advil or ibuprofen?

Depends on the type of pain. Headaches- I usually take it pretty soon, but for other things, I tend to wait.

75. when did you lose your first tooth?

I would assume kindergarten or first grade?

76. what’s your favorite potato food (i.e. tater tots, baked potatoes, fries, chips, etc.)?

fries

77. best plant to grow on a windowsill?

Flowers

78. coffee from a gas station or sushi from a grocery store?

Neither

79. which looks better, your school id photo or your driver’s license photo?

I no longer have a school ID, but that definitely looked better

80. earth tones or jewel tones?

Earth tones

81. fireflies or lightning bugs?

Fireflies sounds so much better, but I say lightning bugs

82. pc or console?

Console

83. writing or drawing?

Writing

84. podcasts or talk radio?

Podcasts

84. barbie or polly pocket?

Barbie

85. fairy tales or mythology?

Fairy tales

86. cookies or cupcakes?

Cupcakes

87. your greatest fear?

I’m going to be single and alone for my entire life

88. your greatest wish?

To fall in love

89. who would you put before everyone else?

My sister

90. luckiest mistake?

I don’t know

91. boxes or bags?

Boxes

92. lamps, overhead lights, sunlight or fairy lights?

Fairy lights

93. nicknames?

Kat, Kate, Backpack

94. favorite season?

Winter

95. favorite app on your phone?

Tumblr

96. desktop background?

It’s a sunflower drawing

97. how many phone numbers do you have memorized?

Maybe 15-20?

98. favorite historical era?

I don’t know

#asks #anon

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unfolded73 · 7 years

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A Drink Between Friends - COMMENTARY

So @justanotherwannabeclassic said, why aren’t there DVD commentaries, but for fic? And I said guuuuuuurl, we used to do those on livejournal all the time, but when I tried to start it as an askbox meme once, I got nothing. So she asked for a commentary of “A Drink Between Friends”, which I just wrote yesterday, so in theory this should be easy, right? Let’s go then.

If you ever want me to commentary a one-shot or fic chapter, hit up my ask box.

He opened the door to find Regina standing on his porch.

“Henry’s on a date,” Killian said, drying his hand off on a dishtowel he had thrown across one shoulder. “I think he said they were going to the movies, so if he’s not answering his phone—”

I rarely make the mistake anymore where I give Killian two hands, but I did here - I said he was “drying his hands off”. Thank god for betas. Also, I think I send Henry on dates too often in these fics to get him out of the way. Usually for banging, but not this time.

“I know he’s on a date, I came to see Emma,” Regina said, adjusting her purse strap on her arm. She was dressed in one of her severe business suits, heels elevating her several inches above her actual height. “I thought she might want to go get a drink.”

Now it’s bugging me that she didn’t just text Emma. Ugh, what a contrived situation. Uh… maybe she was driving by after work and stopped on a whim. Sure.

“She’s working late; she’s still at the sheriff’s station,” he supplied. They stared at each other for a long moment before he stood back and held the door wider. “You’re welcome to come in.”

Regina’s eyebrows went up. “We don’t really do that, you and I.”

Killian frowned. “Don’t do what?”

“Spend time together. As friends,” Regina replied. “I mean, we do, but in a large group that includes your wife and the Charmings and… We don’t ‘hang out’ together.” He could hear the air quotes around ‘hang out’, because Regina Mills didn’t use modern slang without air quotes.

This is one of those times when the struggle for a different phrase becomes a thing in the fic to key into. I sat here thinking, what’s a Regina phrase for ‘hang out’, because she would never say that. Hmmm. Hmmm. Finally I decided to use the fact that it wasn’t her natural way of speaking to increase the awkwardness of her little speech here.

Killian huffed out a breath. “Do you want to come in for a drink or not?”

“Fine,” Regina muttered, stepping over the threshold and setting her purse on the table in the foyer. “I don’t drink rum, you know.”

“I know,” he said, pulling a bottle of whiskey down from a cabinet. “Ice?”

She looked at the bottle, presumably to judge the quality of his liquor, and then shook her head. “No ice.” He poured the whiskey into a short crystal tumbler and handed it over. “Thank you,” Regina said with a quick nod of her head.

Because bad whiskey needs to be chilled and watered down to make it palatable, but the good stuff should be drunk neat, you see. But Regina had to see what he was offering before she decided if she wanted ice.

Killian picked up his trusty bottle of rum (although these days he drank from it relatively infrequently, compared to the past) and poured himself a drink to match Regina’s, gesturing for her to join him in sitting at the kitchen table.

Not sure if I should start talking about Killian’s relationship with alcohol and how extremely problematic it got on the show, or I will never stop. Let’s suffice it to say that while I don’t think he’d ever go cold turkey and start working through a 12-step program, part of being a healthier person in a happy marriage would also include a reduction in how much he drank. And not out of fear of getting fat.

“I figured you’d be out with that band of hooligans on your boat,” she said, her posture stiff.

“The Lost Boys aren’t hooligans, and more than half my sailing class is teenage girls from the high school now anyway,” he said, slumping back in his seat.

This is the one signifier that this fic occurs some months after “What Comes Next,” as (spoiler alert) the remaining Lost Boys and what happened to them was a plot point, and Killian ended up as a de facto sailing instructor to teenagers by the end of that fic.

“I bet it is,” Regina said.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means, you’re their bad boy fantasy come to life.”

He leaned forward in his chair. “I’ll have you know, most of those girls are becoming excellent sailors. They aren’t there for an old, married pirate who wears a sheriff’s deputy badge, my dashing good looks aside.”

This reminds me of this post where Jamie asked if teens would find Colin hot and I polled my kid about it. I mean, yeah, some of those girls are interested in sailing because they’re hot for teacher. But also, they probably end up really liking sailing.

Regina rolled her eyes and sipped her drink, choosing not to respond to that statement. “I hope Emma’s not working too hard.”

“She’s not, surprisingly. She took the day off yesterday, so she’s just catching up on some paperwork this evening.”

Silence settled over them. After a minute, Regina said, “If we aren’t going to have any terrible threats to Storybrooke to discuss, then we’re going to have to learn to make small talk.”

I struggled to find things for them to talk about before they got into the meat of the conversation. So my struggle to come up with stuff for them to talk about became explicitly their struggle in the text.

Killian sighed. “Watch any good television shows lately?”

One of her eyebrows arched. “I don’t like television.”

“Nor me.” He slapped his hand on the table. “Look at that, something else we have in common besides Emma and our dark pasts. We don’t like television.”

Regina laughed, rolling her glass between her hands and looking down at the table. “How much do you think about the old days?” she asked him.

This fic was written more out of order than I usually do, and I ended up shifting around a surprising amount of it, as I struggled to make this into something worth posting. Anyway, I wrote this bit first.

“Which old days? I have quite a lot of them, love.”

Her lips quirked up in a half smile. “Any of the ones when you were a villain.”

“Why do you ask?”

Regina huffed in frustration. “Just humor me.”

These points where they resist opening up to each other are thanks to @j-philly-b, who rightly suggested that it would take a bit more for them to start talking openly with each other.

He swallowed a measure of rum, enjoying the sensation of it warming his chest. “Every day.”

“Me too,” Regina said softly.

Killian looked up, surprised that she would admit something like that to him. “Really?”

Taking a drink as if bolstering her courage, she nodded. “Sometimes I wonder if the guilt will ever entirely go away.”

“Should it?”

“Perhaps not.” She took a sip of her drink. “Although I think there’s something to be said for truly forgiving oneself.”

I fucked up here and used her taking a drink in 2 adjacent paragraphs, due to the moving stuff around. I decided not to fix it, figuring she was really actually nervous about this conversation and using the alcohol as liquid courage.

“And is that what you’ve done? Forgiven yourself?” Killian asked.

Regina stiffened up again. “That’s a rather personal question.”

“You started us down this road, love.” He drummed his fingers on the table. “Humor me.”

Another point where one of them resisted, added toward the end of writing this at @j-philly-b‘s suggestion.

Her eyes skittered away, as if she was looking for an escape from the conversation. Finally she sighed. “On some level, I have. In that I’m not letting guilt keep me up at night so much anymore. I’m allowing myself to be happy. But in other ways, no. I’m still striving to make amends to the people I’ve wronged. And I won’t ever let myself forget,” she said.

Killian swirled the rum in his glass, watching the way the overhead light reflected in the liquid. “We’re very much alike, you and I.”

The way the rum warms his chest, the way it looks in a crystal glass – I was really a little obsessed with all these sensations of drinking, and how a person who is perhaps trying not to drink might be obsessed with them too.

“I know, I told Emma that when we were down in the Underworld rescuing your sorry ass.” She tapped a fingernail against her glass. “It’s why we don’t get along.”

About half-way through writing this, I was getting close to giving up on it, and @j-philly-b reminded me of the UW scene between Emma and Regina in 5x15.

Regina: Well, that’s because he hasn’t forgiven himself.

Emma: How do you know that?

Regina: Though I hate to admit it, we’re much alike… and forgiving yourself is the hardest thing to do. You want to help Hook? Help him with that.

“We get along fine, Regina.”

“It’s why we maintain this distance between us, despite the fact that we’re part of the same family. We don’t like seeing our worst qualities mirrored in the other person.”

So I keyed into that, that they are alike, but more than that it’s why they circulate at opposite ends of the Charming family pool, kind of keeping their distance and often seeming to barely tolerate each other.

He nodded. “I suppose that’s true.”

“Of course it’s true.”

“Do you ever wonder if you could have followed a different path, in spite of all the things that were pushing you toward darkness?” he asked. “There’s goodness in you, clearly, so do you wonder if you could have chosen to be good?”

“And never become the Evil Queen?”

“Exactly.”

“I doubt it. Hatred metastasizes like a cancer, I’ve decided. Self-hatred, hatred of others, it all grows and multiplies inside you until there’s no room for anything else but that.”

Another part that I wrote at the very beginning, this idea of hatred as a cancer. Because what makes a good person turn bad? These are two people who started good and whom we like, so how could they spend years and years being horrible people? That’s where the cancer idea came from. That they got so filled with hate that there was nothing else.

“Aye.” He remembered it, a seemingly endless line of days when he woke up with anger tightening like an iron band around his chest, a list of those who had wronged him, enslaved him, taken his brother, taken his love, taken his hand echoing over and over in his mind like a mantra. And under it, the absolute certainty that if he had been a better person, he wouldn’t have lost everything he ever cared about. “Sometimes it seems like I was a different person then, and other times…”

Killian Jones as Arya Stark, muttering the names of his enemies to himself every night as he falls asleep. Funny AND tragic.

“Take it from one who knows: you weren’t a different person. The dark parts are baked in, and you can’t separate them. They’re a part of you.”

A reference to the Evil Queen/Regina split of S6. A plot I did not like, but it was useful here.

He snorted, and started to raise his glass to finish off his rum, already thinking of pouring himself another. Instead he set the glass down and took his hand off of it. “I do enjoy your pep talks, Regina.”

“I’m an alcoholic, I don’t have one drink. I don’t understand people who have one drink. I don’t understand people who leave half a glass of wine on the table. I don’t understand people who say they’ve had enough. How can you have enough of feeling like this?” – Leo McGarry, The West Wing

The instinct, once he starts drinking, to keep drinking is one he’s consciously resisting. These couple of simple sentences describing his attempt to slow down his drinking are maybe my favorites.

“I’m not saying that I don’t think you’re a good person, obviously. You’re helping to raise my son and are married to one of my closest friends. I’m just saying, people like us, we have to be…”

“Vigilant?”

“Yes.” She thought about it. “Disciplined.”

He pondered that, the way he inspected every small choice he made for evidence that he was slipping toward darkness. Every action he took at work, every time he raised his voice to Henry, every gluttonous or greedy impulse on his part was picked apart and dissected in his mind in the wee hours of the morning.

I am VERY attracted to characters like Killian Jones, and I don’t just mean in a sex way, although yes, that too. I mean the reformed rogue, who has put himself on the path of goodness because of love. But I mean fuck, then what? That’s usually where the story ends. Does he then just have no issue being a good upstanding citizen forever and ever, amen? Does he ever backslide? And if not, how? That’s where that whole idea of vigilance and discipline came from, and the idea that Killian would be constantly monitoring himself. Ugh, it sounds exhausting, it’s making me worry about his long-term happiness, I don’t like where these thoughts are going, somebody stop me.

“I realized at one point that a part of me was angry with David for forgiving me,” he said, finally giving in and draining his glass. “I wanted him to punish me for what I did to his father all those years ago.”

“That’s not really in Charming’s nature,” she said with a sardonic smile.

“He just… forgave me, and not only that, he welcomed me into his family, and at first I was so incredibly grateful.” He swallowed around a lump in his throat.

“So what happened?”

He shrugged. “I started to feel that I owed him this huge debt that I can never repay.”

Yeah, I’m pretty fond of this idea, that Killian would actually resent the ease that David had in forgiving him, and I’m not sure he’d tell Emma he felt that way, so Regina is a perfect confidante for this. He’d want to suffer, and David would not make him suffer.

“And you expected Charming to send you the bill? It doesn’t work like that, Killian. Good people forgive us because it’s in their nature, and maybe because we did a little bit to earn it, and it’s up to us to continue to earn it as time goes on. By being who they expect us to be. Who they see us as. Who we want to be.”

He smirked. “Heroes?”

“Yes, heroes.”

As is often the case, I wish I’d written more. I feel like this ends too abruptly. But at the same time I like them both agreeing that they want to be heroes at the end. So I don’t know, I’m torn about the ending. I always hate my endings.

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