#realizing this is one of 3 flashbacks in this chapter: sorry

[wood-white-writer]

"Didn't mean to make your heart Blue" || [4/...]

- OPLA!Buggy x F!Reader

"I think my brain is rotting in places, I think my heart is ready to die, I think my body's falling in pieces, I think my blood is passing me by."

— Mitski, "Brand New City"

Pairing: Buggy the Clown (Live action) x F!Reader

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 5 | Part 6

Summary: You were an apprentice of Gol D. Roger’s crew in your youth, long before his eventual demise. Along with the Red-Haired Shanks and Buggy, you were a formidable trio; the embodiment of a new generation of pirates yet to come. But times changed, and so did you and your friends. Years have passed since you last saw Buggy following the dispute that you thought ended your friendship. When you finally reunite with the blue-haired menace you once considered your closest friend, it’s under less than “friendly” circumstances.

Warnings: Canon typical violence, LA!Verse, Buggy is a lonely asshole, "Cross-Hairs"/reader is a lonely asshole too, flashbacks, semi-canon divergence, Reader is strong AF, a mixture of both the Reader's and Buggy's POVs, angst

A/N: This chapter is a little shorter than usual with only 2.2k words... Sorry.

Taglist:@kurinhimenezu, @carpinchootaku, @ay0nha, @teh-vampire-bunny, @lokiscure, @internationalsuper-spy, @detectivesparrow (If you want to be tagged for this story, just send me a message or leave a comment :))

You’re like a savage beast when you’re fighting, Buggy admits to himself in awe as he watches you tear through your opponents one by one with substantially more strength than anyone thought your body capable of.

But Buggy's not just anybody. He's always known that your body is of a special sort, an Iron Maiden encompassed by skin, flesh, veins, arteries, and ligaments; capable of bringing ruin to anyone and anything if only you have reason enough. Chains can't hold you, nor can any power on this earth.

He relishes in it.

You have your sword and your pistol both disposable at the belt on your hip, but you seem to have no interest in wielding them for the battle. No, your body is a weapon on its own; a blade cutting through people like grass straws on a narrow field.

It’s during times like these — when he gets to watch your strength from the front rows — that he wonders whether you’ve eaten a Devil Fruit of your own at some point, but that can't be. He’s seen you swim.

You, him, and Shanks had been simply traveling through the town where the Oro Jackson was docked, minding your own business when a group of rival pirates suddenly ambushed you. Thinking they easily could kidnap the apprentices of the famous Gol D. Roger and demand ransom, the shidiots would quickly come to realize that they made a mistake.

A very costly one at that. One they will be sure not to repeat.

Whereas he and Shanks stand partnered together against a few of the rival group, you are holding your own quite well from the other side of the fight. He swears he saw one of the men flying over him at some point, though it might’ve just been a trick of the adrenaline.

Kicking one of the larger pirates straight in the balls with his lower body severed from the rest, he turns his upper body to catch a glimpse of you in case you need help.

What he sees instead is a flash of the sun reflecting in your eyes as you pounce at your prey, casting a yellow line in the air that reminds him of lightning about to strike the ground. Everything around him seems to cease mid-motion save for you. There is no fighting going on, no shouting, no Shanks telling him to take cover from an incoming blow.

All he sees is you, and all he hears is his own voice telling him: "Gods, you’re fucking marvelous."

The last thing he hears is Shanks shouting his name before the world begins to darken around him, and the last thing he sees is lightning making its way toward him, destroying everything in its path to get to him.

He wonders drowsily if it's going to strike him too.

———

The fight that ensues reminds you of the battles you partook in during your years as Captain. The chaos in it all. The carnage. The general inability to think properly as you fight. Of course, your opponents back then lacked Buggy's uncanny ability to split up into multiple parts while still alive, but it doesn't stop you. 

Nothing on this earth can.

Blades are thrown, skin is cut, and by the time you get close enough to reach him, a number of props have scattered to pieces in the midst of your warfare. It seems like an endless battle trying to defeat him, just get him to fucking stay still.

Just as you reach for Buggy's chest with your nails reached out to claw at his vest, his midsection separates and all you're left with is air. Just empty air.

He cackles as he puts himself back a few good feet from where you're standing. "C'mon! Put your back into it! It's like you're not even tryin—!"

In a flash, your face is hairsbreadths away from his, and it feels like everything around him stops. 

At that moment, he realizes that the golden color of the sun has not left your eyes. Only to find that, upon closer inspection, it's not the color of the sun that he's met with.

It's thunder, and it strikes hard.

Before he has the chance to blink, the next thing he knows is the feeling of a boulder being pushed against his stomach. Not a sound leaves his throat save for a guttural groan, and he finds himself on the ground before he knows it with stars adorning the edges of his vision.

Gods, he thinks while in a state of both pain and exhausted satisfaction, your face a blurred canvas in his eyes. You’re so fucking marvelous.

By the time Nami and Zoro debut to join the battle, you have already pinned Buggy to the ground with your legs planted firmly on each side of his hips, and a bruising grip around his neck as you press your forearm down onto it. Not enough to cut his flow of oxygen, but enough so that he doesn't have the capacity to move unless he splits.

His face, the very same face you used to paint when you were younger, looks up at you with nothing short of manic glee. He doesn't even divide himself up to get free this time. It's almost like merely connecting to him, even during an act of violence such as this, is enough to keep him entertained. Happy, you dare think.

You find those sea-blue eyes looking up at you, and before you try and strike the finishing blow, you hesitate. You fuckinghesitate, because when it all comes down to it, you can't find it in yourself to kill him. 

The legendary Captain of the Cross-Haired Pirates, the executioner of a thousand marines and other pirates, can't kill something this time.

You can't kill him. You can't kill those ocean-blue eyes, even when your body yearns to see through with what you promised. You always stick to your promises, but for the first time in forever, you don't. You can't. 

Not him.

Never him.

Meanwhile, Buggy can't help examining you like you're the most fascinating creature he's ever laid his eyes on, because you are. Even after all this time, he's still as drawn to the fire in your eyes that as he was all those years ago. It's a feeling he can never hope to extinguish.

Nor does he want to.

Being the jester that he is, however, he takes the moment to his advantage. This one, vulnerable moment. It's not out of pettiness, but survival. Nothing personal.

He separates his femur and exploits the momentum to knock you off him. He can tell you're surprised as you position yourself on your knees and hands, yet it only takes you a ghost of a moment to recover.

The fire is back in your eyes, a thousand times brighter this time, and the fight continues. 

Now, neither of you holds back, and he becomes first-hand acquainted with just how ruthless truly you can be. When there is nothing keeping you down.

Truth be told, it excites him. Very much so. 

He has the Bounty Hunter and the Tangerine-haired girl hot on his tail, but he hardly provides them a medium of his attention. You're the only thing he can't take his eyes off.

"NAMI! THE CRATES!"

And that's where the entire play gradually comes to an end. Maybe it's what pisses him off the most?

You stalk after his separated body parts like a hunter after a flock of deer, throwing them into the crates as the rest of your companions follow suit. Whereas Nami and Zoro are strategic with their actions, complementing each other, you're acting on pure, unadulterated wrath. 

You do not have Luffy's stretchy capabilities, Zoro's precision, or Nami's diligence. 

What you have is something far, far deadlier.

It's twenty years of pent-up heartache.

Catching pieces of him is much easier than catching all of him.

This is what it's come to, with you and him fighting; with you and him having different goals. It's not the future you envisioned for yourself at all. In fact, it's the exact opposite. If you knew then what you know now, you would've ... 

Once, it was you and him together against the rest of the world. Now, it's you against him, against the rest of the world.

You can feel your eyes threaten to sting as you catch his femur and throw it in an open box that promptly shuts, but like with everything else, you push it down. You push it until all that remains is the vague ache. 

It doesn't matter, you tell yourself. This is what it will stay like. 

In the end, all of his body parts save for his head, hands, and feet are spared from the confinement of the containers, and when he melds them together to a pathetically small version of his usual self, you can't help but address the irony of the situation.

"What have you done to me?!" Buggy cries.

Luffy grins as he caresses his beloved hat, having suffered the most injuries. "Cut you down to size."

Buggy looks as small as you felt that day. Helpless. Pathetic. Reduced to almost nothing.

Still, it's not a moment that brings you any happiness. Not any victory, or satisfaction. You don't even have the urge to gloat. 

All it brings you, as you tower over him from the side, is nothingness. 

You're tempted to kick him, and you almost do. You take a step closer to him, a river of anger rushing through your veins. With nowhere else to go, it circles.

"The One Piece will never be yours!" Buggy yells and flaps his hands, too focused on Luffy to notice you calmly stalking toward him from the dark. "You're just a sad, lonely little boy, wearing another man's hat!" 

It’s Shanks’s hat, you want to scream. Our friend’s hat. Don’t you remember?

Luffy's words don't register with you as you kneel in front of the shortened clown, nor do Nami's questions or Zoro's inquisitive eyes. It all tunes out into the background as you raise your hand slowly to Buggy, and you think about how easy it will be. It will be so easy to end it now. He's weak, he's practically defenseless. There's nothing to stop you now.

Buggy simply stares when he notices you, his mouth slightly parted in what you can only perceive as surprise and ... disbelief? You take one final look at his face, the same face you used to paint long ago, and you briefly wonder how many layers of white, red, and blue separate this one from the touches you applied years ago. 

Is there still some residue left? Any fingerprint? Does anything from you still linger with him, or did he try to scrub your touches off his face the same way he tried to scrub you from his life altogether?

Buggy is completely still as your outstretched fingers close in on him, and he thinks that this is it. Now's the moment when you will make good on your threats, where you'll finally kill him. Truth be told, it's a less-than-satisfactory way to go, but surprisingly enough, it doesn't bother him half as much as he expected it would.

Maybe it's because, after all this time, it's still you until the end? You and him, like it was always meant to be.

He closes his eyes with a sigh and finds that the edge of his lip tilts a little up. "Go for it," he says, awaiting the moment when your calloused fingers grip him. He can anticipate your nails clawing at his scalp, tearing the skin of his cranium, digging until there is nothing left to tear at.

Devil Fruit or not, you're the only one he'll let end him like this.

Except, you don't.

All he feels are your fingertips gently grazing the sides of his cheek, so uncharacteristically soft against his thin stubbles that he could've mistaken it for air brushing his face.

The same hands he knows capable of such great feats of violence and brutality, the same ones who had just fought against him with enough strength to match a beast, are touching him like he's made of glass. 

He snaps his eyes open, and when he meets your gaze, he's surprised to find them ... empty. Hollow. 

The sun is gone, and so is the thunder. Now, there are only clouds in his view.

"Goodbye, Buggy." Your voice is so tranquil that he strains to hear it, and before he gets to, you stand up again and turn your back to him. "He's all yours, Luffy."

No, no! He tries to walk up to you, but his shortened sature won't let him. Don't look away, not yet! Look at me! If only to keep your fucking promise! Just fucking pleas—Please just look at me again!

"GUM-GUM—!"

"No, no, no!" Buggy, for the first time in his life, begs as the kid stretches his arms backward. Not like this. Not yet. He tries to search for you, only to discover that you've already left the circus tent. "Wait, wait, wait! Just wait!"

"— BAZOOKA!"

#buggy the clown #buggy the clown x reader #one piece live action #buggy one piece #buggy x reader #one piece x reader #buggy the clown fanfiction #one piece #one piece buggy

[thehighladywrites]

The Airhead Chronicles

… and the explanation

-> pairing: cassian x bimbo/ditzy reader, nesta archeron, feyre archeron

-> summary: You meet the third Archeron sister, what could she possibly want? Secret and past relationships get discussed

-> warnings: light angst, I had to vilify Nesta, even tho I adore her. Feyre is just fucking hot in this, cuddling, hurt to comfort, reader getting flashbacks/thoughts about her old life, cassian protecting his mate, oh and giving him a blowjob so nsfw lol, also reader is fucked.

-> amara’s note: sorry for the wait, i changed the plot like a million times. seriously, there are versions with super angst, versions where nesta poisons cassian and brainwashes him, there are just crazy plots but i hope you like this one💗💗 also this is probably the final chapter bc i have nothing else left. there will be one vacation chapter later and that’s it💗💗 soon i’ll be posting nerd azriel x bimbo reader, stay tuned👀👀

part 1 part 2 part 3 part 4

“Cassie, baby, who is she?”

Anger filled cassian at the vulnerability in your voice. How dared Nesta speak to you like that? In his anger, he hadn’t realized that he had flinched away from your touch. Looking down at you, his hardened eyes softened.

You looked up at him with a worried expression, eyes filled with fear. He realized what this looked like and hurried himself to explain.

“She’s Feyre and Elain’s sister.”

Nesta’s scoff echoed through his chambers as she stalked closer, keeping eye contact with him. You hadn’t even realized what she was wearing, she was dressed in a very short night gown and robe.

Wait, was she in here for Cassian?

No, Feyre and Rhys told you that Nesta wasn’t present at dinner today but she was aware of the two of you.

This isn’t making any sense, maybe she’s confused. Because no one goes after a mated fae, right? Yes, that’s it! She must be confused.

She had to be fucking confused because you really didn’t like how close she was standing to him.

Stepping forward you gave her a sickly sweet smile,

“You’re like really pretty, I can tell you’re their sister but you’re too close to my mate. Back off.”

Nesta looked at you bewildered,

“Excuse you? I'm merely talking to him. Are you not allowed friends, Cassian? Don't you find that a tad controlling?” she delivered with a mix of disdain and sharp sarcasm, her words cutting through the air like a blade.

She stepped closer to you and you had never seen so much hate in a persons eye.

“And who do you think you are? I’ve known him for several years, so if I want a moment to talk to him then it’s what I shall have.”

You smiled at her ready to punch her,

“You’re dressed like a slut in his room. I mean there’s nothing wrong with it, we all should embrace our inner sluts but just not with my mate, okay? Either back off or I’ll make you back off and that’s just a hassle. I mean, I just got these nails and my outfit is too cute for blood!”

Before she could step closer, Cassian grabbed your arm and pulled you back as he kept an unreadable face towards Nesta.

“Give us a moment.”

Your stomach dropped as you caught her secret smile. Why did they need to be alone? Had you done something? Oh Gods would he go back to her now? He wouldn’t do that right?

Flashbacks from your past came back, men would have their fun and then leave you. It was a big insecurity you had and you just hoped it wasn’t like that.

“But-”

“One moment.”

His firm words made your throat close up, you always got emotional when someone raised your voice at you, so to save face, you ripped your arm out of his grip, not once looking back as you hurried out of his room ready to leave.

—

Cassian’s pov:

As the doors closed, Cassian glanced back at the door with nausea as he heard your sobs. In that moment, he wished he could be closer to you. The safety he felt with you was incomparable to anyone else. The need to comfort you was taking over.

“She is as stupid as a bag of rocks. You’ve seriously mated with her?”

Cassian's head whipped towards Nesta, anger simmering in his eyes. He couldn't stand her condescending tone and the comment that belittled you.

Cassian's voice was firm and filled with a lethal edge as he addressed Nesta,

“I don’t know what the fuck you think you’re doing, but you need to leave. I don’t care what you think we had, if you ever speak to my mate like that again, I’ll kill you.”

His words were clipped as he practically spit them at her. Nesta still not grasping his rage and annoyence, started pulling on the strings of her robe, trying to undress.

“Please, you know you would be happier and more satisfied with me. Don’t you remember the times you took me like some rabid beast in bed? You can’t honestly tell me you don’t miss me.”

She got closer and closer, but before she could touch his body, he grabbed her forearm.

Cassian maintained a strong grip on her, pulling her closer. His voice was unwavering, “As I said, you insulted my mate and you’re directly ignoring what I’m saying. I don’t miss you in the slightest, Nesta. I’m finally happy, and I feel sorry that you must resort to this.”

She pulled her arm back roughly and again scoffed,

“Love always made you disgustingly weak.”

Cassian chuckled, “Loving you sure did. But with her, it has made me stronger than ever. It's a pity you don't understand that strength.”

He pivoted and stared out the window as he delivered his last words to her.

“Even if she wasn’t my mate, it would have never been us. So, don’t ever disrespect her like this again. And if I find out you’ve said anything else to or about her, there would be no one in this world stopping me from getting you.”

His words were casual and promising as if he wasn’t talking about literally murdering her for even speaking ill to you.

——

You tried not to cry, but being the sensitive soul you were, tears just couldn't resist. Ugh, talk about embarrassing! How on earth were you supposed to face that girl again? And when you replayed his tone in your head, the waterworks just cranked up a notch.

Trying to find your way through Rhysand's massive mansion, you got easily distracted. Oh, look, a beautiful painting! You gazed up at the massive artwork that covered most of the wall. It showed a life-sized scene with Rhysand, Feyre, Elain, Amren, Mor, Azriel, and—hold on—Nesta and Cassian sitting very close. Wait, no, she was sitting on top of him. What the fuck? Were they a thing before you? Why didn't he tell you? He just casually mentioned she was the third Archeron sister, conveniently skipping the whole history chapter.

Great. The male you mated with was just like every lying piece of shit out there. You rolled your eyes at the situation, irritated that you once again realized that males only wanted one thing from you and after they were done, moved on to another. You couldn’t lie, it really stung, especially with the bond but you’d survive.

“I was supposed to throw that away tomorrow.”

Feyre's gentle voice reached your ears, prompting you to lift your head in her direction. With a sorrowful expression, you acknowledged her, doing your best to hold back tears.

Feyre had been a true friend; you had loved her from the moment Rhysand introduced her to you. She was incredibly funny, offered great advice, and was the perfect companion for gossip. Many times, you had found solace in her arms when someone broke your heart, and you knew that if she asked how you felt now, tears would be inevitable.

“Oh, hi Fey. Is this a secret painting or something?”

She gave you her signature soft smile, moving closer as she looked at her painting.

“No, honey, not secret. Old. This was something I painted a few years ago. And it is not needed anymore, so I was getting rid of it since no one wanted the reminder up.”

“Be honest Fey, were they a couple?”

She looked hesitant to answer but sighed and explained,

“They thought they were mates. They were together, yes, but there was a lot of miscommunication and fights. Nesta became very closed off and wanted nothing to do with Cassian after a while. They broke up, and it became a big shift in our family. Now she lives in her own apartment, and we barely see her. Every night we invite her for dinner, but she doesn’t even bother declining; she just doesn’t come.”

Your brain just focused on the fact that they were almost mates. And now she was upstairs in a closed room with your real mate. What the hell was she doing here if she deliberately declined every dinner Feyre invited her to?

“Well, surprise, she’s here. Yeah, that’s right, she’s upstairs talking to him right now.”

“Wait, what? She’s here? What is she doing with Cassian? She said she never wanted to be around him ever again.”

You felt nauseous. She was trying to win him back. Your man, she was wanting YOUR man now that he was locked up and unavailable.

Feyre’s muffled words pulled you out of your thoughts as you asked her to repeat herself, too busy in your own mind to hear her the first time.

“I said let’s go up to them. What could they possibly be talking about that you don’t need to hear? Let’s go.”

She grabbed your hand, and you could tell she was totally pissed off. You smiled a little to yourself. Maybe you didn’t even need to say anything after all.

You climbed up the stairs as your heels clicked against every step. Ugh, you really needed a few inches off.

You froze at the thought. Had you really reached rock bottom? Shaking your head at the rash thought you kept climbing. You’d rather fucking die than not use your many, many heels.

The door opened up, and both of you stopped in your tracks. Nesta stepped out of the room and looked between you and Feyre before her lips twitched in a cruel smile. She pulled her robe tighter and glanced back into the room, fixing her hair as she shoved right past you, all while smiling and hitting both of your shoulders.

You felt like time stopped. Your stomach dropped, and your throat closed up. Honestly, you didn’t know who to confront first – the homewrecking bitch or the cheating bastard.

There was no missing her insinuation. Come on, you saw what she wore under her robe – a piece of lace and nothing more. And now she was pulling it tighter to her? Yeah right, they totally fucked.

Okay, the cheating bastard it was since Feyre turned around and grabbed Nesta’s arm, pushing her into the wall.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing? You ignore my invitations, and now you’re back in Cassian’s room? To what? To show him how distasteful you are? Why, in the Mother’s name, would you go inside, dressed like this when you know he has a mate? I thought you, of all people, would know more about class, Nesta.”

Nesta looks you dead in the eyes as she just smiles again and shrugs Feyre off.

“He will come back to me eventually. Cassian knows where his true feelings lie.”

“I’ve never called another girl a bitch, because that’s like so weird but you’re the biggest, grade A bitch i’ve met in my life. I’m mated to him, not you. And keep one eye open, because I will so kick your ass when you least expect it.”

You had an acrylic nail pointing to her. You also give her an annoyed look before turning around, leaving her with Feyre as you open up the room to see Cassian looking out the window.

“Please, tell me she didn’t do what I think she did. Because I will actually kill you both.”

Cassian turned around with a tired expression and stepped forward before picking you up with one arm and bringing you to the foot of his bed. He began undressing, leathers and siphons discarded on a nearby table. He pulled you closer and began undressing you too which put a crease in your brow.

“I love getting fucked but sex isn’t the answer, Cassie. I don’t like feeling left out, so just explain.”

He looked at you with soft eyes before kissing your forehead and lifting you up again. He strode to the other side of the bed before gently putting you down and sliding underneath the sheets. He pulled you impossibly closer until you were almost on top of him with your head on his chest and took a breather before explaining.

“She tried to undress and then get me back, but I made it clear that it wasn't something I wanted. It's a really long story, but Nesta used to be closed off, pushing people away to shield herself from getting hurt. After facing a lot of challenges, we got together, but we just weren't a good fit. We clashed a lot, and she eventually reverted to her old ways. The breakup was messy, but honestly, we're both better off without each other.”

Tears welled up in your eyes as you listened. Sympathy and pain for them surged within you, yet a selfish relief that you still had him to yourself.

“Tonight, she panicked when she saw you. I said no, asked her to leave, but then she tried to undress. I firmly kicked her out. I'm sorry for dismissing you like that, sweetheart. I know her well, and she might have said something to you. I don't think I could have held back if she did.”

Oh, that explains why she was fixing her robe! Phew, the sight nearly made you sick.

While you briefly considered telling Cassian about Nesta's earlier words about where his feelings lie, you decided to leave it at that. You're definitely planning to kick her ass someday, just not right now. Your current priority is to snuggle up to your Cassie and comfort him.

A sweet kiss and blowjob, just as you promised, seems like the perfect remedy to make everything better.

You shift your head and look up at his tired face.

Maybe just the kiss today, you decide. He looked very tired and-

“A blowjob sounds mighty fine, sweet girl.”

Your eyes widen a bit as your cheeks heat at his words. You then remember that he knew what you were thinking because of the bond. He could be really forward sometimes, your perfect match.

“I was just thinking of giving you one but you seem really, really tired, Cassie. Ya still want one from me?”

He shifted, grabbing your hips before sitting you upright on his lap so that you straddled his lying body.

“Sugar, I’ll take anything you have to offer me.”

He let out a deep chuckle at the way your face lit up with a smile as you let out a shriek of excitement.

Your hands eagerly tore the blanket away, shifting down to get eye-level with his cock.

“This is all mine, no one in the whole world will ever get it, ever. Just mine.”

Cassian raised himself onto his elbows, gazing at you before offering reassurance,

"Only yours, sweet one. Forever."

You smile at him before you wrap your plush lips around his leaking tip, humming when he groans in pleasure.

Your entire body heats at his needy sounds. There was nothing you loved than making Cassian feel good. His hisses and little ‘ fuck, right there baby’ was filling you up with pride and was really giving you an ego boost. It was you making him feel like this, you who he loved more than anything.

The thought alone made your pussy wet. The scary 6’7 general of The Night Court, one of the most feared and skilled warriors in history was nothing more than a babbling mess infront of you.

Cassian lets you take your time, allowing you to get used to his size. He lets you take control even though all he wants to do is bury his cock deep in you. So when you run your tongue into his slit, his hips jerk and his cock hits the back of your throat, making you gag on him.

“There’s my girl, so fucking perfect for me. Can you take me all the way, baby?”

You nod and take him deeper before you swallow, making your throat contract around his whole lenght. He gasps then pulls out with a pop, looking at you bewildered. You however just stared at him irritated, huffing at the disruption.

“Cassie, I wasn’t done! Why did you pull out, I almost had you,” you whine at him.

“Exactly. And we’re not done yet. I plan on fucking you until you can’t think straight.”

Cassian pulled you closer, putting a fat kiss on your lips before getting on top of you and fulfilling his promise to you.

He fucked you so hard, you passed out from the intensity. You had cum over and over again, time not registering in your brain.

As you sat together, the atmosphere turned sweet, and you found solace in the connection. All you knew was the comfort of his being, engulfing you.

—

You both lay there exhausted, wrapped in each other's arms, the once turbulent bond now a tranquil river of love and understanding.

“You wanna tell me about your shopping trip yesterday, sweets?” he asked, eager to hear your voice light up with excitement as you shared details about your latest fashion finds. Your ability to bring a sense of peace and light with the simplest conversations made Cassian feel an unmatched warmth. He knew he'd never love anyone as deeply as he loved you.

Throughout the night and into the next morning, you talked about everything under the sun. You even took a moment to explore his old room, running your fingers over his old possessions and playfully trying on his oversized leathers. The connection between you two felt stronger than ever, a testament to the depth of your bond.

Again, he thought about how there was no one he would ever love as much as he loved you.

Cassian was in deep, deep water and he wasn’t planning on ever getting out.

🏷️ taglist: @danikamariewrites @amara-moonlight @willowpains @cleverzonkwombatsludge @stonerpersona @starsinyourseyes @phoenixgurl030 @dreamlandreader @fxckmiup @infintyfandoms @ayme301 @sevikas-whore @fightmedraco @sweetshifter @stasiereads @rowaelinsdaughter @redbleedingrose @clairebear08 @thelov3lybookworm

#talkswithamara #acotar #acotar x reader #a court of thorns and roses #acotar imagine #general cassian #cassian x you #cassian acotar #cassian fanfic #cassian imagine #cassian acomaf #cassian #cassian x reader #cassian x bimbo reader #cassian x y/n #airhead chronicles #feyre archeron x reader #mommy feyre #feyre x reader #feyre cursebreaker #feyre archeron #feyre acotar #feyre #nesta archeron #nesta #nesta acotar #cassian smut #acotar smut #sarah j maas #sjm books

[back2bluesidex]

Where Do Broken Hearts Go - Chapter 3 (18+)

Pairing: Model, ex-boyfriend!Jungkook X Child psychologist, Fem!Reader X Lawyer, Single Dad!Hoseok. 

Summary: Jungkook stripped your emotions naked, left you bare in the chilly wind of despair and self-doubt with an unending heartache. You tried your hardest to move on from him, to live for yourself but failed miserably. Each night you had to come back to your empty home where memories and broken dreams were scattered all around the floor, until one day a little angel and her unbelievably beautiful father came into your life. Finally, when you find yourself healing, maybe falling too, Jungkook had to show up! Again!

Theme: Angst, pining, heartbreak, break-up, implied smut

Warnings: Mentions of school bullying, implied smut, multiple pov changes, we got Hoseok's POV too!! mentions of alcohol consumption, a flashback, palpable tension between Hoseok and reader.

Word count: 4.7k

Taglist requests are closed.

Minors and karens are not allowed in this blog

A/N: The chapter starts with Hoseok's POV. JK's POV is added to the very end of the story. Sorry for the delay. I really struggled with this chapter. But I hope you guys like it. Please share your thoughts, I'd love to talk to you about it. and even if you are only reading the story, I still love you regardless.

Main Masterlist

Chapters:- 

Prologue/Masterpost || Chapter 1 || Chapter 2 || Chapter 3 || Chapter 4 || Chapter 5 || Chapter 6 || Chapter 7 - Finale

“It’s so big, dad! It’s so big” the astonishment in Sua’s voice fills Hoseok’ heart with adoration. How come he has given birth and raised such an adorable human being! 

Even if ten years ago somebody had told him that he would be raising a daughter alone with very little to no help, he would have laughed at their faces. But now, he can’t even think of a time when Sua wouldn’t be with him to brighten up his day, his life, his entire existence.

“Sua, let’s get into the queue! Fast!” your voice cuts through the thin chill of the air. 

Hoseok’s eyes land on your figure and he finds you as beautiful as ever, if not more. He has come across countless women in his life but there are very few who have left any impact on him. 

You are definitely one of them. 

He knew you had to be special from the moment he witnessed Namjoon apparently struggling to shut his mouth while praising you and your capabilities. Hoseok knows his childhood friend too well and he knows that the man is not someone to be impressed easily. Hence, you had to be really compatible. 

But he definitely didn’t expect you to be so attractive. 

The moment his eyes met yours, he knew it was going to be hard for him to maintain this doctor-client relationship with you. And he was right. Things are getting even harder because he has to see you in your casual (and pretty) clothing, smiling and laughing with his daughter, and being equally excited about getting in the giant merry-go-round. 

One of the very few things that he learnt about you includes the fact that you don’t need a ton of makeup or extravagant dresses to look bold and beautiful. When he saw you at the clinic for the first time, you were wearing a formal blouse and dress pants and yet you looked effortlessly attractive. During both of the outdoor therapy sessions, you chose to wear jeans and tops. And again Hoseok is finding it hard to divert his eyes from you. 

On top of that, seeing you and Sua blending and bonding so well, makes him wish for forbidden things that are both too unethical and early for him to wish. 

“Daddy! Are you coming or not?” Sua shouts from a distance and that’s when Hoseok realizes that he has been far too lost in his thoughts, or more like, his thoughts of you. 

He walked fast towards the steps where you and Sua are standing, the same steps lead you into the small cabin of the giant merry-go-round. 

Sua’s shoes clink against the metal floor of the small cabin making both of you and Hoseok laugh at her excitement. She settles at one side of the cabin and gestures to both of you to come inside. 

Just as Hoseok is about to step inside, you hold his arm with your small palm. Something warm floods inside Hoseok and he finds this simple, insignificant act way too intimate. He eyes the place where your hand is touching him and then looks into your eyes. 

God! Your eyes are so beautiful, probably the most beautiful pair of eyes he has ever seen. He feels heat creeping up his neck. 

“You may hear things that will break your heart or unsettle you but I would appreciate it if you could keep your cool and refrain from reacting much.” your voice is low enough to make sure Sua doesn’t hear you. Hoseok understands and nods as you two finally settle inside the cabin. You sit beside Sua while he sits in the opposite direction. 

The cabin is almost midair when Hoseok sees your body going rigid, your face losing colors and your eyes shutting on their own accord. On the other hand, Sua seems to be enjoying the view much more than what is expected from a seven year old.  

It doesn’t take anyone a second guess to make out that you are acrophobic. 

“Y/N, are you okay?” Hoseok voices out of concern, reaching for your hands in the process. You nod to assure your well-being. 

Sua whips her head and turns to take a look at you. 

“Y/N! Are you afraid of merry-go-rounds?” Sua grips your fingers with her small hands. Hoseok takes his approaching hands back under his custody. 

You laugh a little, even though your face says you are two seconds away from throwing up. 

“Not exactly merry-go-round, Sua. But I am afraid of heights.” You reply through your gritted teeth. 

“Oh? Is that a thing?” Sua questions. Hoseok sits back and observes the conversation. He realizes you are about to make it about Sua very soon. 

“Yes. Fear of heights is called Acrophobia. But it was a secret! Now you know one of my biggest secrets, Sua!” you fake annoyance, all through your nerve-wrecking fear. Hoseok is surely very amazed with you now. 

“Oh no!” Sua giggles. 

“Don’t laugh. In exchange for my secret, you gotta tell me one of your secrets too. Or better tell me what you are afraid of the most? It’s a rule. You can’t back off.” You seem to ease up quite a lot now. 

“What am I afraid of? Do I have to tell you?��� Sua questions with a very serious expression. 

“Yes. don’t you think it will be unfair to me if you don’t?” You reason. 

“That is right. But then daddy has to tell us his secret too. He heard you, just like me!” Sua pouts. Hoseok chuckles at his daughter's cute protests. 

“Sure. I don’t have a problem.” he mutters. Eyes drifting to your face, which is focused on Sua. He sighs. You look even more beautiful under the golden hue of the setting sun. You look unreal, almost like a dream. 

“Okay then let's start with Hoseok, shall we?”  You speak with a trembling voice as the giant wheel starts to move again. 

“Yes. yes. Daddy should go first.” Sua chimes in, way too delighted to finally know what scares her father the most. 

“Spiders. I am afraid of spiders the most! God, those little creatures are the bane of my existence.'' As soon as Hoseok’s sentence ends, he hears roars of laughter from both of you and his daughter. 

“I knew it! Daddy hates bugs so much!” Sua breaks into another fit of laughter, you join her soon after.   

Hoseok feels like an achievement, having made you and Sua laugh so loud, it’s certainly an achievement to him. 

“Okay okay! It’s your turn now.” you say while winding a hand around Sua’s little body, tugging her close to you. 

For the first time in the afternoon, Hoseok finds his heart beating erratically because of you. 

“I-” Sua’s face loses the glow in an instant, “I am- I am afraid of dark rooms. Dark rooms are so scary. I hate it! I-I hate it!” She covers her ears with her tiny palms. 

Hoseok’s heart breaks at the sight, just like you had warned him earlier. He tries to reach out for Sua but sees you tugging her close to your chest, patting her back and calming her down before her anxiety excelates any further. 

“Does Jaemin have anything to do with this, Sua?” you approach carefully, patting her back during the entire time. 

Sua doesn’t say anything but she nods in your chest. 

Hoseok’s heart breaks even more. He has been raising Sua providing every possible comfort he could offer. He thought he was successful in keeping his daughter away from all the harms of the world, but he was wrong. Somewhere, out of his knowledge, Sua was being terribly treated. The thought ensues a destructive anger in him, both for whoever Jaemin is and for himself. No matter how much he tried to be a great father, he failed to protect his babygirl and he is totally ashamed of himself. 

When he looks up at you, he finds you smiling at him as if to assure something, as if to say, “hey, it’s alright”. He returns the smile with a heavy heart. 

One thing about Sua is that it’s really easy to divert her mind and cheer her up. 

Only an hour ago she was trembling in your chest, engulfed in fear of dark rooms and that bully. But right now she is smiling widely, totally thrilled to be riding the Camelot Carousel. 

However, the person you are currently worried about is Hoseok. He is not at all doing well. 

“You okay?” Letting your voice sound a little concerned, you ask Hoseok. 

“I don’t know. I feel like I failed my duties as a parent. I couldn’t protect her.” Hoseok sighs. His shoulders rise and fall, making them brush with yours. It somewhat pains you to see him like this, especially when you could tell him for hours how good of a father he is despite all the complexities he had faced.  

“Are you a magician or something?” you reply a little playfully. 

“What?” Hoseok chuckles.

“No, right? Then how can you expect everything to be under your control? You are a human being after all, Hoseok. Being a parent doesn’t give you superpowers. There will always be shortcomings. But considering you have failed because of those, is certainly not justified. You are a good, in fact a great dad, Hoseok. And I need you to believe that yourself.” By the time you finish talking, you find Hoseok facing you. 

Both of you are lost in each others’ eyes. All the chatters, clamoring, noise, the music from the carousel have faded in the background. Silence is buzzing in your ears and your eyes are focusing only on him. 

Hoseok’s hair is not as styled as the other two times you have seen him. It’s more casual and curly today. Some curls fall on his forehead, almost reaching his eyes. His eyes are as dark and intimidating as ever. And if you are not wrong then you find those dropping on your lips momentarily before he is dragging his eyes back to yours again. 

“You are a good psychologist but.. you are a better human being and I hope you know that, Y/N.” Hoseok speaks a little breathlessly. 

“Maybe.. Or maybe not.” You add, finally turning your body towards the carousel again. You don’t look at him anymore. You don’t want him to read the vulnerability in your eyes that formed because he called you a good human being. 

Your mind instantly goes back to Jungkook. You blame him for everything. He is the reason why you are so sensitive, so miserable that your eyes are blurring just because someone called you a good person. 

It’s pathetic. You’re pathetic. And pathetically Jungkook doesn’t care about the state he has pushed you in. 

“I didn’t get to ask you earlier but are you okay?” Hoseok asks, walking side-by-side with you while carrying Sua piggyback as she is fast asleep. 

You get a little nervous at his question. Did hoseok really see the miserable you through your strong girl facade? 

“Yes. I'm totally fine. Why are you asking though?” you quiz back. 

“You pretty much lost all the color of your face while riding on the giant wheel.” Hoseok chuckles a little. 

“Oh. that!” you chuckle too, “I am fine now.” 

“Do you always do this? I mean, going out of your comfort zone to help your patients?” 

“That’s a part of our job. If we can’t face our fears, we won’t be able to help others.” You sigh a little. 

Hoseok only nods and you two fall in a comfortable silence. 

“It was a great day, and we made good progress. Hope she will open up more to me by the next session. So, see you next friday?” You say as you approach your car. 

“Oh- next friday. Shit! I almost forgot.” Hoseok groans and you find it mindlessly attractive, “I have a very important hearing next Friday. We may have to skip the session.” 

“Skipping a session might not be a wise choice as she finally started to talk. Is there a way to reschedule it?” You shift your weight from one foot to another. 

“I am so sorry but I will be occupied with all the preparations for this whole week. I don’t think I can make it before saturday.” Hoseok pouts a little. 

And good lord! He is so manly yet so cute! You feel like running away again!

“I can work this Saturday if you want.” you propose, knowing exactly what you are doing. 

“Really? I will be so grateful if you do but I don’t want to ruin your weekend.” 

“I don’t have anything special planned anyway. So..” You just hope you don’t sound desperate. 

“Okay. Done! Saturday at the same time? I will text you the venue later on?” Hoseok smiles widely and you feel your heart melting. 

You nod. 

On your way back home, you feel a little guilty about the way you persuaded Hoseok earlier. You practically just used him as an excuse to refrain from going to Jimin’s party. You know Jungkook will be there and you don’t want to see him. You will briefly see Jimin and give him the gift before meeting Hoseok and Sua. 

Work is always one of the most plausible excuses after all. 

There are two thoughts plaguing Hoseok’s mind. 

One, Sua being bullied at school and him being unaware of it all.

Two, You.  

You are doing the unexplainable to him. 

He had many people telling him that he is a great dad, he is doing an exceptional job in raising his daughter almost alone, but all of those words felt hollow and more like a courtesy than like an appreciation. 

However, for the very first time when he felt those words to be genuine, those were coming out of your mouth. 

“Being a parent doesn’t give you superpowers. There will always be shortcomings. But thinking you have failed because of those, is certainly not justified. You are a good, in fact a great dad, Hoseok. And I need you to believe that yourself.”  your words replay in his head. He intakes a sharp breath and sips whiskey from his glass.

Staring at the almost deserted road outside his window, he feels sympathetic for them. Because he knows what it is like to be deserted, to be alone. 

On nights like these, when he is a little unsettled, a little troubled, a little miserable… he seeks warmth of a shelter, a home, a lover. 

Hoseok sighs, closing his eyes he tries to picture a lover and the face he sees throws him off the edge… because it’s you. It’s his daughter’s therapist, somebody he doesn’t even know that well, somebody that is clearly off limits. 

He growls in frustration, slams the glass of liquor hardly on the table in the process.

He should not be feeling like this. He is beyond the age of having innocent crushes. It’s only need, want and lust at this point of his life. And there’s no way you can satiate those. 

So, he does what he could arrange. He takes his phone and dials the number of the person he knows will keep his bed warm at night. 

Saturday rolls around much faster than you would prefer. For once you consider canceling the plan but then you opt for going. 

Jungkook and you had a messy breakup, that’s true, but your common set of friends or acquaintances have nothing to do with it. They are more of Jungkook’s friends than yours anyway. So, you have nothing to lose if they suddenly start blaming you even if it’s your ex-boyfriend who ended the relationship. 

However, you know Jimin would be different. He knows you better than any other friend of Jungkook. And he is the reason why you two met. 

Four years ago, when you were a fresh graduate, broke and desperate. You rented this cheap studio apartment. Jimin was your neighbor living just across the hall. And Jungkook was (and is) his best friend. 

There was nothing romantic about yours and Jungkook’s meeting, rather it was a scene to be remembered. 

It was summer, burning hot. Jimin, being weirdly himself, decided to dive into his very uncomfortable and shallow bathtub. Without a doubt, his decision resulted in him having a bump on the forehead. 

Jimin somehow managed to call Jungkook, who came to his rescue. Who also came knocking on your door in search of ice. That’s the day you met him for the first time, then became friends and in turn, lovers. 

The memory of Jungkook asking you out stings like a fresh wound these days. 

“So I was thinking…” he’d said, eyes zoning out of focus. He had looked at everything else other than you. 

“Hmm?” you had an idea what was this going to be about and you were elated to say the least. You and Jungkook had been flirting with each other for a good time already. A comment here, a touch there, all of it made you feel like you were new. You were in love for the very first time and you realized you have never loved any of your past partners as much as you loved this doe eyed, bunny featured boy. 

You knew your feelings were reciprocated as you were able to read Jungkook and the way he would behave around you. You were waiting for him to be the first one to break the ice and if he proved to be way too shy to do anything, you would come up and take the charge. 

But you didn’t have to do so. Jungkook broke the tension as soon as he heard you needed a partner to join you to your very first networking party. 

“I could be your date to that party you were talking about- I mean- if you want you know?” his mouth latched to the beer can, taking a long sip to avoid your eyes again. 

“Are you only suggesting or are asking me out?” You played with him.

Gulping the beer he opened his mouth to reply but he got tensed as soon as he saw you smiling and staring at him intently, “I am- umm- what I want to say is that-'' he gulped again “it would be nice if I could be your date. I would love to be your date.” 

“And why is that?” you were enjoying teasing him. 

He flushed at your sudden question. You could clearly see the way he was getting more and more nervous with each passing second. 

“I-I don’t know how to say it. Uh- It may feel a bit creepy since we don’t know each other for that long and I am already asking to be your date. But I- I like you. It’s okay if you don’t feel the same-” 

You shut him up by capturing his lips with yours in a sudden kiss. 

It took him a moment to process your actions but when he did, he kissed you back with ten times more intensity. He slid his tongue inside your mouth, his hands found their way inside your tank top, he placed you on the top of his lap, pressing his groin to your core deliciously. A pair of tongues danced for dominance, and soon you found yourself writhing under him as he made you cum again and again. 

You come out of your flashback as you absentmindedly touch the heated part of the hair straighter. 

Wow. What a great start to a Saturday, you think to yourself. 

Gladly, we didn’t cry or have a meltdown this time. You smile to yourself, reaching for a band aid. This seems like healing. You are recovering faster than you thought you would, which makes you happy for sure. 

Only if it was an average meeting, you wouldn’t put so much effort on your look. But you gotta meet Jimin first, who is probably already in a party mood, wearing his million dollar worth Dior outfits and Tiffany bracelets. And you don’t want to appear like a homeless kid before him. Moreover, Hoseok decided this week’s venue to be one of the fanciest bakeries of the town. Hence, it’s better if you doll up a bit.   

You look at yourself through the rear view mirror, hoping that you are not overdressed for a therapy session and not undressed to meet your super popular friend. 

Ok, you look presentable. What could possibly go wrong if you turn up to both of your meetings like this. Nothing. 

The signal turns green and you are about to start your car except the fact that it doesn’t. 

You spoke too soon. Obviously! Your car had to break down in the middle of the road like this! It is, certainly, one of the finest Saturday mornings you have ever had.  

If there’s anything positive then you are just two blocks away from Jimin’s house, hence, you won’t have to walk for long in your heels. 

It’s almost 2:45 when you complete calling insurance, handing over your car, and taking care of all the paperworks. There is no way in the world you could meet the Jungs by 3:30, so you decide to shoot Hoseok a quick text while walking towards Jimin’s house. You inform him that you are going to be late by 30 minutes or so as your car broke down earlier. 

And you receive a call from him when you are in the elevator. 

“Hey, is everything alright?” Hoseok’s smooth voice creates a weird session in your ear, which tickles down directly to your heart, warming it up much more than you would like to admit. 

“Ah, yeah. Everything is fine. The car suddenly broke down while I was on the way to a friend’s home. And I am not well-aware of the public transport here. So, it may take some time for me to figure things out and reach the bakery.” keeping your eyes on the elevator door, you speak into your device. 

“Uh- if you don’t mind… I can pick you up.” Hoseok suggests, voice a little small. 

“It’s so kind of you, Hoseok but I don’t want to trouble you.” you reply. It’s safe to say that you would love to accept his kindness but then again, you don’t wanna appear to be a desperate, broken hearted, naive little girl. 

“It won’t be a problem for me, Y/N. Just text me the address? Hm? I am sure Sua would love it too.” This time Hoseok’s voice is even more confident with a hint of authority in it. And you won’t like to turn him down. Agreeing with his proposition you cut the call, and type out the address just then the elevator dings open. 

You haven’t been to Jimin’s place more than a couple of times but it is never hard to find his door, even though each of the condo looks just the same from outside. 

Because Jimin’s door is always decorated as if it’s christmas. And today he even walked an extra mile and placed a full-size catboard cutout of himself with an edited crown on the top of his head and an animated birthday cake on one elevated hand. 

You stifle a laugh while you press on the door bell. 

And when the door opens, it’s not Jimin on the other side.

You are one of the main reasons why Jungkook decided to show up during the afternoon, have lunch with Jimin and then quietly leave before the party starts. His privacy is certainly a concern but not more than running into you. 

But it seems like Life has different plans. 

It’s you, who decided to show up right after 30 minutes of his arrival. 

It’s you, who looks absolutely shattered by seeing him on the other side of the door.

It’s you, who is effortlessly sporting a black and red floral sundress with your slender neck and collarbones on display. 

He stares at you with blown out pupils as you do the same. And suddenly Jungkook realizes that he misses you… or more like, misses seeing your beautiful face. If that makes sense.

“Y/N..” he murmurs under breath and he knows you can’t hear him. 

You gulp and then open your mouth to say something but Jimin cuts you off. 

“Y/N! You are here!” Jimin runs towards you, shoving Jungkook out of the doorway and pulls you inside. “But wait. You are here to tell me you can’t make it to the party, don’t you?” 

Jungkook obverses you intently, zeroing his eyes on you and only you. You give Jimin one of your beautiful smiles and then hold out his gift. 

“Sorry, Jiminie, I have a session today and I am already late for it. But a very very happy birthday to you.” tiptoeing, you reach Jimin's height and place a sweet kiss on his cheek. Jimin hugs you as you hug him back.

The scene irritates Jungkook and he doesn’t understand why. He has always been the jealous type, overprotective and possessive type. He never liked it when guys, even if your common friends, become too cozy with you. But that was in the past. That was when he was yours and you were his. That was when he was still in love with you. So, there is no apparent reason behind his irritation now. 

He tries to move his eyes from you but then his eyes fall on your finger wrapped in a band-aid. Even before he knows what he is doing, he walks towards you, grabs your hand and examines the injury. 

"Did you cut yourself again?" Jungkook investigates, as if he still has any right over you. 

You snatch your hand back from his grip as if his touches burn. 

"No. It's nothing." You reply, avoiding his entire presence. 

Smiling brightly at Jimin, you murmur "I should go now. I'm running behind schedule." 

"But it's Saturday. You don't work on weekends." Jungkook's mouth runs before his mind.

"I'm changing." You finally look at him, your eyes shoot daggers at him. 

"But, Y/N-" Jimin starts to speak only to get cut off mid sentence as your phone starts ringing. 

Jungkook doesn't want to but he can't control himself from peeking at your phone. But before he could make out the caller id, you receive it, “Hello… Oh you are here. Just a minute I am coming.” 

“Jimin, I gotta go. I am sorry and happy birthday.” You rush your parting sentence, as if you don’t want to keep, whoever is here to pick you up, waiting. 

“Y/N, you didn’t even rest your butt!” Jimin protests and you laugh. 

“It’s a special client, Jimin. I don’t have a choice.” you smile apologetically to him. 

The fact that you have smiled so many times already but not a single one was directed towards him. He knows he hasn't done anything to deserve your smiles but he craves for them regardless.

He wants to ask you how are you doing, if you are eating properly or not, if you are sleeping in time or do you still stay up reading books. He wants to ask for forgiveness, to say that he is sorry, to suggest that you move on and stop hurting because of him, but even before he could say a word… you are gone. 

Jimin jogs towards the balcony and he joins just to see who this special client of yours is. 

Never once during your relationship has he seen you working during the weekends, you also never accepted any gifts or lifts from your clients, and there was no reason for doing so since most of your clients are teenagers. 

But earlier you said you were changing, is that why it’s a tall and good looking man who is here to receive you? 

You come in the picture a minute or two later and walk towards your special client. Placing a hand on the small of your back, he guides you to the passenger seat. 

Jungkook can’t make out your facial features from the 5th floor, but he knows you are most definitely smiling. And the knowledge doesn’t sit right with him; rather it sets his senses on fire and that familiar overprotectiveness, possessiveness plague his mind. 

“Oooohhh-” Jimin sings song, “a young, handsome client, who might as well be something more.” 

“No. She is still in love with me.”  Jungkook grits his jaw at the sight of the car leaving, taking away you. 

Taglist:-

@phenomenalgirl9 @variety-is-the-joy-of-life @sukunabitch @chimchimmarie @coffeedepressionsoup @meowstake @vonvi-blog @nochuel @xjoonchildx @justmewondering-recs @cuteipat @miakey98 @purpleanchorcrown @chimmisbae @ane102 @junniesoleilkth @terjeonbebas @kookssecret @appleh4ad @kayleeshinee @whoa-jo @definetlythinkimanalien @lovelgirl22 @agrika

#bts angst #bts smut #jungkook angst #jungkook smut #hoseok angst #hoseok smut #bts x reader #jungkook x reader #hoseok x reader #bts fanfiction #jungkook fanfic #hoseok scenarios #jhope angst #jhope smut

[midnightsnyx]

girl at home | mat barzal | part 6

pairing: mat barzal x fem!reader chapter summary: a new face threatens what you've started to build with mat and nora & you recieve some much needed advice from jax

warnings: angst, not edited, mentions of food, a sprinkle of fluff word count: 1.7k (sry its not longer i am trying my best lol) authors note: hi so it's been a month and change but i am finally able to present to you guys, part 6!! thank you for the continuous love on this story. your likes, reblogs & comments mean the WORLD to me!!! someone said nora needs to start a parent trap - don't worry, she's on it <3 quick important notes: the first bit in italics is a flashback. not sure if I will do many more of them. second, i have no idea how many more parts there will be to this series because i feel like i've barely scratched the surface of what can be done. and last, im sorry if your name is calista. enjoy and please don't hate me :)

requests are open. masterpost masterlist tag form askbox

It wasn’t often that you and Mat had time to yourselves. He was busy with school and hockey, and you had a lot going on so when the opportunity arose, you always made time for each other. Liana was at a sleepover and his parents were gone out for dinner with friends so the two of you had the house to yourselves for a few hours, which as teenagers, wasn’t often. His parents were always good about giving you and Mat space but you were still teenagers, after all. 

You were curled up together on his bed with some random movie playing in the background but you weren’t paying attention to it. You were thinking about graduation that was fast approaching and what the aftermath would look like. It wasn’t a surprise that the two of you would be going separate ways once you graduated high school. Although not set in stone, Mat was on his way to the National Hockey League to an unknown team. It wasn’t realistic for you to wait to see where he would end up and then figure something out for school. You had scholarships and your heart set on UBC, not quite yet ready to move too far from home. 

But Mat, well he could go anywhere. 

You’d toyed the idea of a long distance relationship in your head but you always ended up realizing that it wasn’t logical. Mat would probably be playing on a team thousands of miles away and you were going to be busy with university. Sure, there were holidays and summers but going from being basically attached at the hip to hardly seeing each other. 

“What’re you thinking ‘bout?” Mat suddenly mumbled. His hand had been rubbing your back but when it stopped, you thought he had fallen asleep. 

“Graduation,” you said and his body stiffened. The difference between the two of you was that you were an overthinker and a planner whereas Mat was a go with the flow type of person. He didn’t think about things until he had to. 

When he didn’t say anything, you peered up at him. He was frowning, staring at the ceiling in deep thought. You reached out to smoothen the wrinkle between his eyes and he looked down at you and smiled. 

“If I was selfish enough to ask you to come with me wherever I end up, would you say yes?” 

It was a theoretical question because you knew he would never be that selfish. Neither were you though, because you would never ask him to give up his dream. 

“No,” you admitted and his smile didn’t waver but something flickered in his eyes. 

***

As a general rule of thumb, you don’t introduce Nora to anyone you date until the three month mark. It isn’t something that you have to worry about often because most of the guys you meet run the second they find out you have a daughter. It doesn’t bother you most of the time; you have your family and friends, and Nora is your number one priority so if someone has a problem with you having a kid, they aren’t worth your time. 

So, it didn’t occur to you that it was a conversation you should have had with Mat. You thought that he had enough common sense not to bring the girl you recently learned that he’s casually seeing, to lunch with you and Nora. 

It takes all of your willpower to stay in your seat and not take Nora and leave when they sit across from you. Mat seems completely unfazed by the sudden tension in the room and it hurts on some level because he used to know you so well that if something was upsetting you, he always knew. 

But that was when you were kids.

You don’t get a chance to say anything because Nora gives the girl a onceover, and wrinkles her nose. 

“Who’s that?” She asks in such a bitter tone that you’re torn between scolding her or laughing. 

The girl, to her credit, doesn’t even blink an eye. She just offers her hand to Nora and introduces herself. 

“I’m Calista, and you must be Nora,” she says, still holding her hand out and waiting for your daughter to shake it. When she realizes that Nora is not going to respond, she quickly brings her hand back and lays them in her lap. Mat looks absolutely horrified, either by Nora’s behavior or the fact that you haven’t scolded her. He’s still not sure if he’s allowed to reprimand her when she acts out and often looks to you to be the bad guy. You’re enjoying this a little too much though, especially when he coughs and gestures to you.

“Cal, this is-”

“His baby mama,” you cut him off, smiling sweetly at her. He’s not getting off the hook for ambushing you, and sure, maybe it’s a little childish of you but you have heard the stories from Liana already and you know you won’t like this girl. 

“Um, nice to meet you,” she says awkwardly, but there’s something in her eyes that tells you she isn’t the innocent, sweet, new girlfriend of Mathew Barzal. There’s definitely a different personality hiding behind the curtain. 

“Have you guys ordered already?” Mat asks.

“No, we were waiting on you,” is your reply and you make sure to emphasize on the word you. He doesn’t humor you with a response, instead looking at the menu and asking Calista what she wants. 

Lunch goes about as terrible as you expected, with Nora acting out because of a new person suddenly joining the outings she was used to only being the three of you. She ignores Mat’s attempts at talking to her, opting to read a book she brought along and gives Calista the stink eye anytime she speaks. You’re fine with her wanting to ignore Calista, but you don’t want her relationship with Mat to suffer because of this, so towards the end of lunch, you excuse yourself to the washroom in hopes that she might talk to Mat if you step away. 

The only problem is that Calista decides to tag along with you, claiming she needs to wash her hands. You suspect there will be something more and your suspicions are proved true when you’re washing your hands and she walks up next to you. 

“The whole kid-trap thing is really cute,” she says, fixing her hair. “Just keep in mind that it’s me in his bed every night.” 

She doesn’t give you a chance to say anything before she quickly walks out of the restroom. You stand in shock for a moment, because you haven’t had a girl talk to you like that since high school. Liana wasn’t wrong when she told you there was something off about the new girl Mat was seeing, but this teenage-like attitude? This isn’t something that Nora is going to be around.

You storm out of the restroom, planning on taking Nora and leaving right away but you stop short when you see Mat and Nora talking. She’s giggling about something he must have said and the fondness and love in his eyes towards her is almost enough to make you stay but one look at Calista, reminds you why you were leaving in the first place. So, you walk over to the table, picking up Nora from her chair even though she’s capable of walking herself and tossing a twenty on the table. You don’t look at Mat before you leave, only calling out a goodbye over your shoulder. 

Nora doesn’t say anything until you’re buckling her seatbelt. 

“I didn’t like her,” she says casually.

“Yeah,” you agree. “Me neither.”

*** 

Mat blows up your phone with calls and texts but you ignore them. As soon as you left the restaurant, you planned on driving straight home and you knew that was where Mat would look first so instead you drove around aimlessly until you ended up in Jax’s driveway. Nora fell asleep about twenty minutes ago and you didn’t want to wake her, so you sent him a text to come out to your car. You watch as Jax comes out of his house and runs down the driveway in bare feet, climbing in your car and closing the door quietly. 

“It went that bad, huh?”

You’re quiet for a moment before leaning forward and resting your head on the steering wheel and taking a deep breath. 

“I feel like Mat and I are stuck in this constant cycle, you know?” you mutter quietly.. “Like, two steps forward and then five back. Everytime I think we’re making progress, something happens and I can’t help but wonder if I should have let him in her life at all. I’ve been a mom for 6 years, and Mat has only been a parent for a few weeks so the rational part of me knows I can’t be too hard on him, but I feel like we’re not making any progress and this is just going to end up bad, especially for Nora.”

Jax knows you well, and doesn’t say anything right away. He lets you say and feel your own thoughts out loud before giving his opinion. 

“Want me to sugarcoat anything?” he asks and you lift your head to look at him. Jax is looking at you with slight concern so you know he’s about to give you his exact thoughts. 

You shake your head and he sighs. 

“I think you still have feelings for Mat,” he says and when you open your mouth to cut him off, he stops you. “I’m not saying that you’re still in love with him, but you have something going on in your head that is creating chaos with the relationship you have with him now. You said he’s doing well with Nora, yeah?”

You nod, but don’t say anything. 

“If he’s doing well with Nora, you shouldn’t be having these doubts about if you should have let him in her life. You’re her mom, you know what’s best and if you really felt like it wasn’t working, you would have stopped it right away. You are the problem, whatever lingering feelings you are holding inside, you’ve got to figure them out.”

For a split second, you hate Jax. For a split second, you want to yell and scream and swear at him because he’s right.

“He has a girlfriend,” you whisper.

“Yeah,” Jax says. “Why are you upset about it?” 

You shrug. “I don’t know.”

He doesn’t say anything until you look at him. 

“I think you do,” he replies.

You hate that he’s right.

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#hockey imagines #allies writing #nhl fanfiction #hockey fanfiction #nhl imagines #hockey imagine #mat barzal x reader #mat barzal imagine #mat barzal fic #mat barzal fanfiction #mat barzal x you #mat barzal x y/n

[hyunfilms]

blue side of the sky (lmh) | fifteen.

♡ spotify playlist | series masterlist

—summary: waking up after 3 months with no recollection of your past, your friends do what they can to help you remember. except, they omit an important piece to the puzzle - afraid you would remember the heartbreak and hurt all over again.

—pairing: lee know x f. reader

—genre: (18+) exes to lovers, bestfriends to lovers au | fluff, angst, smut

—word count: 4.4k

—chapter content/warnings: cussing/mature language, flashbacks - more soft, affectionate moments, small kisses, i honestly dunno how to explain the rest of the chapter 😭 lots of things are said and done, yelling/confrontations, crying, most of it still doesn't make sense for oc and it's very overwhelming...

☁︎ FLASHBACK | LAST NIGHT

"Can you still come over tomorrow, too? I think it'd be good if we talked about everything." Minho looks at you with pure adoration, heart soaring after you surprised him and dropped by after your movie night with Uncle Adrian.

"Okay. Are you sure you're ready to?"

"Yeah, I am. We should. Just so we're on the same page." He holds you closer. "But tonight, we can just be here and watch whatever you wanna watch."

"Sounds good with me." You softly smile while looking up at him. "Wait." You turn to lay on your stomach and look at him. "Tell me how we met in high school. How you met Jisung."

"Oh god." He cringes, groaning into the pillow but you fight to remove it from his face. You finally succeed, cupping his face to make him look at you. He laughs and gives in anyway, pulling you close to him as you continue to wait for his response. "Fine. You're lucky you're cute."

"Tell me!" You pout.

"Okay!" He laughs. "It's really anticlimactic, you know?"

"Okay? I still wanna know." You rest your chin on your palm. 

"I was late to class on our first day of freshman year because I had to go to the office to get my schedule sorted out. On my way to class, Jisung almost ran into me cause he was rushing. Dropped his books and everything." Minho laughs. "It was everywhere. He was frantically picking it up." Minho tried to mimic Jisung being a mess. "He kept saying sorry and that he was late. I kinda just watched him run off without saying anything because I didn't know what to say."

"You didn't even help him?"

"He kept saying not to!" You chuckle. "But anyway, after that, I found out my locker was next to his. You know him, he's always been super talkative. I guess that's how we got close."

"And how did we meet?"

"I came along with Jisung to meet you after school to eat. We picked you up at your school, then walked down the street to the small restaurant we started going to often afterwards."

"Hm." You hum.

"Look." Minho grabs an old polaroid from his nightstand, showing one with you, him, and Jisung in your high school uniforms eating at the restaurant; the other polaroid is just you, smiling. "It's one of my favorite pictures."

"You just keep it there?" You look at his nightstand and he nods.

"Mhm."

"Minho." You move up, tracing his jaw with your finger.

"Yeah?"

"Do you still hate taking pictures?" You remember Jisung mentioning this to you, but part of you is now starting to realize it must have to do with this history he has yet to talk to you about.

"Kinda, I guess? They're just not my thing." You rest your chin on his chest and subtly nod. You rest there for a minute, with Minho beginning to gently stroke your hair. 

"You okay?" You give him a small, toothless smile.

"Mhm."

"What are you thinking about?"

"Nothing." Minho lets out a breath before lazily pulling you closer to his face by the elbows.

"You sure?"

"Mhm."

"Hey." He says softly. "You know I just want you to be happy, right?"

"Where is this coming from?"

"Nowhere. You know that though, right?" You giggle a bit.

"Yeah, of course."

"You come first, and I will always prioritize your happiness before anybody's."

"Minho."

"Just listen." He pouts a bit. "I just need you to know this."

"Okay." You answer close to a whisper. "I know you would, I wouldn't doubt it."

"No matter what."

"No matter what."

"Okay." Minho feels a sense of relief because he really just needed you to know that. Of course, right now, he must seem blinded by the affection in the air and everything that's been going on between you two— but he truly hopes you know that he will always support you and keep you happy, no matter what that may look like.

Even after everything happens, he will make sure you're happy.

Even if that meant ending this.

Even if that meant giving you space.

Being your bestfriend before anything.

He will make sure you're happy.

"Come here." He breaks the silence again, pulling you onto his lips gently, softly; passionately. He holds the kiss for awhile before repeatedly pressing kisses to your lips. He pulls you onto him, deepening the kiss a little bit more; hands gripping onto your hips as you gently roll against him.

He loves you.

You are love to Minho.

You are the blue sky to Minho.

And this is probably the last time he'll get to hold you and kiss you like this.

☁︎ END

"You're off today?" You ask Uncle Adrian as you pop into the house, curious to see what's in the fridge.

"I could ask you the same." He laughs. "Did you just come from the boys' house?"

"Way earlier. Minho dropped me off before heading to the café. I just figured I'd pop in after seeing you move around in the kitchen." He nods.

"Come, I'm about to make brunch. Anything you're craving for? Like, pancakes? Eggs? Bacon?"

"Hm, nothing too heavy. Toast, bacon, eggs?" He nods.

"Alright, they're all coming up then." He opens the fridge and takes out a carton of orange juice. "Orange juice? Water, tea?"

"Water is good." You smile at him as he slides you a nice, cold glass of water. He begins to toast some bread while preparing the stove for the eggs and bacon. 

"What're your plans today? No work, no class?"

"Nope. I was gonna go to class, but I changed my mind. I worked some overtime the past few shifts. Plus, I went to class the other day and loaded up my new pieces in the kiln. Think it's a perfect time for a little break." You sip on some water. "I'm going to the café in a bit to meet up with Jisung. Then, we'll go back to their place and just hang out again."

"Nice." He looks at you while he quickly beats the eggs and pours it into the pan. "Those two treating you well?"

"Of course."

"Good. You seem happier."

"Do I?" He nods.

"Mhm."

"I guess so." You smile to yourself as trace your water glass, remembering the past moments with Minho; how safe, how warm he feels. How he makes you feel. "Things just finally feel.. settled. I feel content."

"Well, I'm glad you're happy and content." He says with a tiny hint of worry in his statement, but he trusts Minho is learning and is trying to do better. Of course, he never wants to see you hurt. But, he has a big heart, and he also believes people deserve second chances [being that they prove themselves worthy]. He just hopes you are genuinely happy.

He hopes Minho and Jisung have been talking to you about everything. He truly, truly hopes so.

"Yeah, it feels nice." You giggle, tracing the rim of your cup. "What about you? How're your projects going?"

"They're going alright. We completed one, finally. Might pick up another big job about an hour away. Need to build a new space for a client." He sighs. "Which reminds me, I need to follow up with him and set up a meeting to talk about what exactly he's looking for."

"That's great! And you will follow up with him. But for now, maybe just enjoy your day off?" You tilt your head and Uncle Adrian laughs.

"You're right." He slides the plate over to you. "Here, got yours ready first. Dig in!"

"I can wait for you."

"No, you have places to be." He chuckles. "You can eat Y/N. Don't worry about your little ol' uncle." You laugh and bite into your bacon.

"Thank you for breakfast." 

"My pleasure." Uncle Adrian continues to talk to you a bit more about work, but he does promise he'll enjoy his day off and not think about it much. You talk to him about Mrs. Pak and how great work has been, how much fun you're having at pottery class. How the drawings and paintings are finally coming back to you, finally easing into your fingertips.

Sooner or later, you get up to wash your dishes and freshen up— leaving the house to catch the next bus and train. You bid your farewell and tell your uncle not to stay up to wait, that your friends will take care of you tonight so no need to keep watch of the side door [and your guest home door]. He insists on driving you to the café, but you promise him the public transportation trek isn't bad and you enjoy taking the trip. You reassure him until you've successfully made it out the door and on your way to the stop.

It's quite nice traveling alone, especially when the train is close to empty. The streets are busy though, mixed with workers grabbing lunch, and people just enjoying their day. You stop by the shop to see Mrs. Pak, but she quickly shoos you away [in a lovingly manner] and tells you to enjoy your day off. When you make your way into Sunday Morning, you don't catch sight of Minho or Jisung. But, you do see a few other favorites:

"Y/N, hi!" JJ smiles from ear to ear and you can't help but giggle. Right next to him is Soobin, working away at making everyone's drinks. Soobin gives you a nod and a wave, in which you return after greeting JJ. 

"Where's Minho?"

"Being the worst and not manning the register like he should be." 

"I'm busy loading up the cookies since you forgot to do it even after I asked." You hear Minho's voice in the back.

"See? The worst." Minho glares at him as he walks out, wiping his hands on a paper towel before tossing it into the trash. His eyes land on you and his expression softens; Minho subtly biting onto this bottom lip to prevent himself from smiling too wide.

"Hi. Hope I wasn't interrupting your cookie time?" You say as you approach the register, hugging your tote bag close to you.

"No, not at all. JJ's just being JJ." Minho clears his throat while pushing JJ aside. "What can I get you, pretty?"

"Iced coffee, please?"

"Extra sweet?" You chuckle and nod.

"Jisung isn't here yet?"

"No, but he'll probably trickle in soon." Minho shrugs nonchalantly like he always does, making you chuckle as you sit at a table and get comfortable. He follows shortly behind with your coffee, pulling up a chair just as he places your cup down. "Want anything to eat?"

"No. My uncle was off today! He made some brunch." Minho chuckles.

"That's nice. Glad he finally has a decent day off."

"Me too." You pull out your sketchbook, pulling up a picture of a bouquet you helped prepare with Mrs. Pak yesterday. "How's it been so far?"

"Mm, same old. Kinda busy."

"Busy is good." You chuckle.

"What're you working on?" You flip your phone and show him the picture of the bouquet.

"I made this with Mrs. Pak yesterday. We had to help with a small company event and they requested a couple of bouquets for pick up."

"That's really pretty."

"Thank you. I worked hard." Minho laughs.

"You always do." You give him a small, shy smile, heat rising to your cheeks with the way he's looking at you from across the table. "You're still coming over, right?"

"Mhm, of course. You said you wanted to talk."

"I do."

"Yo!" You turn your head to see Jisung walking in, holding onto his backpack strap, headphones loosely hanging around his neck. He waves to JJ and Soobin, instantly spotting you and Minho at a table afterwards. "My favorite people." Jisung plops onto a chair and lets his bag gently fall to the ground.

"Why do you sound like you ran a marathon?"

"I did." Jisung pouts. "No, but we had a team meeting that went on for so long. Too much shit. I'm drained." Minho nods. "Hi cielo."

"Hi pachi."

"What're you doing?"

"Just drawing."

"How'd you get here?"

"Bus, train. My uncle was off and insisted on bringing me, but I told him I didn't mind the trip."

"Oh, he's off? That's good." Jisung shifts his attention to Minho and pouts [whines] again. "I'm hungry." He rubs at his tummy. "My tummy's gonna eat itself." Minho rolls his eyes.

"What do you want?" Jisung smiles.

"Iced Americano. Chocolate croissant. Pretty please?" Minho nods and walks towards Soobin and JJ, muttering a few things as he gets Jisung's order ready. "Cielo."

"Hm?"

"What do you wanna do later with the guys?" Jisung pulls out his laptop and starts typing away, eyes fixed on the screen in front of him.

"Anything."

"Okay, so you'd play Super Smash Bros?"

"Sure." You chuckle. "As long as I can use Kirby."

"Weak." Jisung teases before letting out a small laugh. "Kidding. Deal. How about food?"

"Hm. You know what sounds nice?"

"Yeah?" He questions with a head tilt.

"Burgers." He shrugs.

"Can buy some or make Minho cook it." You shake your head.

"Let's get them to-go somewhere?" He nods.

"Sounds good."

"What're you working on, Ji?"

"Some last minute action items from work." He sighs. "Long ass meeting." He lets out, still in disbelief at how incredibly long [and unproductive] that meeting was. "What are you drawing?" You turn your phone towards him.

"Look at these bouquets I made with Mrs. Pak."

"Yo, those are beautiful." He scrolls between pictures. "You're gonna have Mrs. Pak's business booming soon."

"I hope so." You chuckle. "I mean it'll be busy, but she really deserves the support."

"Agreed." He smiles. "They're really pretty. Let me see the final drawing after." You nod.

"Here, princess." Minho says, the both of you looking up at him.

"Me or her?" 

"Just take the food." Minho look at Jisung in disgust and slides his tray over to him before walking back to the counter.

"Well, I don't know! I thought you were bringing Y/N something else." Jisung exclaims before sipping on his iced americano. "Goodness. I needed this." You chuckle.

You continue to draw at the table while Jisung works for a bit in front of you. He talks about his coworkers and how the one thing they did discuss at the meeting was the company's BBQ soon at the office. Their team has decided to bring in a few dishes to contribute, which is unfortunate for Jisung. He tells you that he's tried to look up certain recipes to try, but he ultimately gave up. He insists [and finalizes] that he'll buy ramen for everyone.

"Like, you're going to make a pot of ramen, or you're going to buy the cups and bring it?"

"Shouldn't I just bring the cups? What if people don't want it, then the rest of the ramen goes to waste."

"True, I mean you could always pack it up." He shakes his head.

"It won't be fresh or anything."

"Just say you wanna bring the cups cause it's easier."

"I wanna bring the cups cause it's easier." He does as he's told, making you laugh. At this point, Minho returns, swinging the chair for him to sit in. 

"So, what's the plan later?" Minho asks, even though he knows the main thing he needs to do tonight is talk to you. He'll keep it normal though, he'll hang out and let it be a nice evening before he pulls you aside to talk. He just wants to do this gently as much as possible, easing all of this onto you without any restrictions. You needed to know, and he will do everything to keep you comfortable— even if that meant creating distance for you to be in your own peace.

"Maybe you should work first before asking." JJ teases from behind the counter, but Minho simply looks over his shoulder before returning his attention towards you two.

"Order some burgers for takeout then play Smash Bros." Jisung shrugs while looking at him. "I don't know what else."

"We should camp outside in the backyard."

"Camp.. outside in the backyard?"

"Yeah, we have tents. Weather's still pretty nice."

"Actually, that sounds kinda fun." You rest your chin on the palm of your hand, now focused on shading. 

"We have a bigger tent that could fit all five of us. And we could use Seungmin's projector to pull up a movie against the side of the house or something."

"When the hell did we get a bigger tent that could fit all five of us?"

"My dad gave it to us in case we wanted to go camping."

"Oh, I didn't know that." Jisung responds with a head tilt. "Kinda do agree. We should set it up later." Minho stands and pushes the chair in, stretching a bit.

"Alright well, let me get—" The attention suddenly shifts to the door swinging open abruptly, a few voices echoing into the café before one individual storms inside. To your surprise, it's Kat; and you're only surprised because you do recall Minho saying whatever they had was done with. You haven't seen her in awhile, and you weren't expecting her to storm in after some time.

But, she is angry.

She's looking right at you and Minho.

"Nice fucking going." Kat storms in angrily, heading straight for Minho who is still standing near your table. "What the hell is wrong with you?!"

"What are you doing? Can you keep your voice down?" Minho furrows his brows and puts his hand out to keep some distance between him and Kat. She's fuming, and Minho isn't exactly sure why— but, he does have an inkling as to why she's this upset. She must have had a few more words to share with him and didn't like the fact that she was [finally] blocked.

"Keep my voice down? What's your problem? All of a sudden, you're blocking me—" Minho sighs heavily.

"Can we not talk about this here?"

"Because of her?" She laughs, making Jisung stand up next to Minho in an attempt to protect you from whatever Kat has up her sleeve.

Though, nothing would've prepared them for this very moment. Not from Kat.

"Dude." Jisung says sternly.

"Not the time." Minho picks up on the cue, trying to get Kat to leave as peacefully as possible. But, of course, peaceful isn't in her vocabulary— so she continues.

"Wow, unbelievable." She rolls her eyes. "It's really funny how you're suddenly so protective over her. You weren't like that before, at least, not that I could remember."

"Kat." Minho calls her name once, and he's hoping it's enough of a warning. It's not. 

"Don't start." She aggressively whips around to try and avoid Minho's reach. You're so confused, especially when Jisung is clenching his jaw. JJ is suddenly getting closer, and Soobin is on high alert. Why do you suddenly feel like you're being sucked into this never-ending black hole? Why does this all feel wrong? "Just so you know Y/N, your so-called bestfriends? They've been lying to you and hiding so much shit from you. Especially this one." She scoffs. "He was never even loyal to you, to the point where he let you leave that night—"

"Kat!" Minho yells, grabbing her wrist again. He truly wasn't trying to touch her, or get handsy in his café— in public. But, it's unfortunate that he has to, along with JJ's help. "You need to leave. Now!"

"W-what?" You look at Jisung, then back at Minho.

"Let go of me! Did you really think you could hide from her forever—"

"That's enough! Get the hell out!" JJ yells as he rushes over and holds the door open for her. "Seriously, don't make me call the police. Got the nerve to do this in a damn café, you must be outta your mind!"

"Please don't come back here. I mean that." Minho sternly says, his jaw clenched.

"You're all so fucking pathetic." She laughs, shaking her head. "At least now she knows how amazing you guys truly are." She sarcastically spits out before walking away, her friends [who had been lingering outside] right beside her. People in the café are too stunned to speak about the drama that just ensued, and lots of them are giving your entire group looks.

But, you don't care.

Right now, you don't. 

Because this is all going to blow over for everyone else; for you, it won't.

They lied to you. They hid from you.

"Y/N, let's talk about this." You stand and create some distance between you and Minho, Jisung right by him.

"What did she mean?" You shakily ask. "Was it true?" You did have a feeling Kat was part of this history, but you never knew it would be this big. Not something that would just blow up in your face on a random day in this café. Not something that makes you feel queasy, sick to your stomach.

Because now, it feels like everything.

You thought you might have played a part, like you might have been the reason why there was a bumpy past. But now you're understanding that it was never you, that it was her. It was Minho. It was Jisung.

It was everyone but you.

"Was it true?" You repeat. Both Minho and Jisung are silent, and their silence is telling. It tells you everything you need to know. Everything you needed to know that everyone else felt like you didn't. You start shaking your head more, tears steadily falling down your cheeks even though you don't know the story, the details— but what you do know is that you are hurt. The two people you loved and trusted are standing here, looking you in the eye, yet they aren't doing much to make you feel better.

"Y/N, please. I can explain, just let me explain all of this—"

"I can't be here. I-I have to go." You quietly pack up your things.

"Cielo, let me bring you home. Let's just talk—" You look at Jisung and your heart hurts even more. Jisung was supposed to be your other half, and here he is; looking at you with those guilty, puppy eyes. Part of you still hopes it isn't as bad as it seems, that maybe this is all a misunderstanding. It's hard to bypass your gut feelings, though.

"I'm going to go." You look at him. "Alone. Please don't follow me or anything."

"Cielo. We need to talk about this."

"Please. I'm not asking." You throw the bag strap over your shoulder. "Excuse me." You push through, Minho calling your name once—twice— before you're finally outside.

You can breathe.

The anxiety is still bubbling in your stomach, but you can breathe. 

You hurriedly walk to the train station to start your trek back home, tears still streaming down your face as you keep your head hung low. You don't even know what this means, what this means for you and your friends, what this means for tomorrow. The day after. The future.

And you're scared.

But just knowing that they've hid things from you, hurts.

It aches.

The pain is dull, but it aches.

The ride home is difficult; you keep your head down the entire time to avoid showing your tears. Your phone is constantly going off with texts from Jisung [you assume] but the most you can do at this moment is silence your phone.

You drag yourself home, head still hung low even as you step into your door and place your things down. You look around your space, your room, eyes landing on the pictures you have. Then, the tears fall continuously; on, and on, and on. You sit back onto your bed, crying into your hands as everything Kat said replayed in your head. 

"Just so you know Y/N, your so-called bestfriends? They've been lying to you and hiding so much shit from you. Especially this one."

"He was never even loyal to you."

Minho no longer feels safe, warm.

"Y/N, are you home already?" You hear Uncle Adrian softly call out at your door. He must have heard you come in through the side door, but wasn't able to catch sight of you. 

"Yes." You mumble through your words. "Come in." And with that, he swings the door open and pokes his head into your room. His heart instantly drops when he sees you in the bed, crying— wiping away at your tears while you sniffle away.

"Hey, what's wrong?" He sits next to you. "What happened?"

"They've been hiding from me." Uncle Adrian's heart crumbles to pieces when he hears the words come out of your mouth because he knows. 

Oh, he definitely knows what you mean.

But, Uncle Adrian doesn't respond and you can't help but look at him to see if you're missing something. You can tell. His look is softer, more worry and fear laced in his expression than anything else.

"Uncle, why aren't you saying anything?" His head drops a bit, letting out a hefty sigh. "Y-you knew about this, too?"

"I'm so sorry, Y/N."

"D-Does everyone know besides me?" Silence. "I've been going around looking that stupid? Because here I was.. going on, trying to get used to the world again and enjoying every moment. Little did I know that everyone was hiding stuff from me." You sniffle.

"What exactly happened today?"

"Kat came into the café today. She was mad at Minho, then she started saying all this stuff to me about my bestfriends hiding stuff a-and lying to me. S-she told me Minho was never—" You pause to let out a breath. "—Was never loyal to me." You look at your uncle and his heart breaks. "I don't even know what she means, but I know it hurts."

"Minho and Jisung were going to tell you eventually." Which, he truly means. He believed they would. He just didn't think they were going to take this long, especially with the way Minho is going about things. He can't say he's mad, but he can't say he isn't disappointed they didn't do it sooner. There was no way Uncle Adrian would've known or kept track of all this, even if he wanted to. He just trusted them to take care of it the way that they say they would.

"But, that's the problem. Why couldn't anyone just be honest from the beginning?"

"This is tough." He shakily says. "I'm so sorry, Y/N. We never meant to hurt you, we just wanted to protect you and keep you safe. We wanted to give you time, however long you needed, to re-adjust. 

"Did you not believe I could take it? I would've wanted to know."

"It's not that." He sighs a bit. "Jisung was just worried about you, and he was mainly concerned about letting you get through things one step at time. He didn't want to overwhelm you."

"How bad can it be? Can't you tell me?" He looks at you, but you don't respond as you're trying your very best to look at this under a different light. You're trying to see Jisung's reasoning, but you don't have anything to work with. No one wants to tell you exactly what happened. At least, no one was in a rush to.

Why?

"You should really talk to your friends." He gives you a very small, faint smile to try and reassure you somehow. He wishes he could tell you, he wishes he could ease whatever you're feeling right now. But, he thinks it's best for Minho and Jisung to take the reigns on this one. "Minho, especially."

⇢ 15.5 [cloudy days]: here

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[justmeinadaze]

Finally/Beautiful Stranger (Steddie X You)

A/N: Part of this AU, you don't have to have read the others to understand but it helps!

Also, please feel free to donate or buy me a coffee. Anything helps but of course you don't have to. I will still love you :)

Warnings: Former Addicts Steddie X Fem Y/N, SMUT, slight spanking, dirty talk, very light DOM dynamics touched on, mentions of lose of virginity (as well as the pain that comes along with the first time), FLUFF, These three people love each other very much and all three are happier compared to previous chapters. The talk about their new lives and careers with pride <3.

ANGST, dark themes!! of addiction and recovering addicts explored. Not new for this series but again this one is much lighter than the others. They both discussing cravings and Eddie having a slip a few months prior. Steve works at a center with children of addicts and one boy has a similar situation to Y/N's accident so she helps him through that.

The boys mention regrets including being aggressive with the reader verbally and sometimes physically when they weren't sober so DOMESTIC ABUSE TRIGGER.

There are flashbacks of them as kids so mentions of Eddie and Steve dealing with their toxic dads.

I think that's it! As always go carefully in this AU and if you choose not to read that is ok. I will still love you!

Word Count: 8358

1974

You winced as you landed back first on to the gravel underneath where you had fallen from the jungle gym. 

“Oh wow! Are you okay?!” A set of hands gripped your biceps as they helped you get to your feet. “You have some stuff on your dress. Let me…” The boy’s voice trailed off as you felt him dust off the nature that stuck to your outfit. 

“Thank you.”, you mumbled as you turned to meet your hero, coming face to face with honey brown eyes and a comforting smile. 

“You’re welcome. Are you alright? Do you need to go to the nurse or…?”

“No. I think I’m okay. My, uh, back broke my fall.” You grin when he laughs. “I’m Y/N.”

“Steve.”

“Harrington?”

“Um, yeah?”

“No! Don’t mean to sound mean. The girls in my class think you’re cute. They never shut up about you.”

The boy laughs harder and your grin grows at the sight of his scrunched nose. 

“I have no idea why. I’m not that great.”

“I don’t know. I mean…I think you are.” Steve blushes at your answer and you reach out to grab his hand leading him towards the swing set. 

The two of you talk casually about things normal children your age talk about like tv shows and music. Shouting suddenly grabs your attention causing you to slow to a stop as a boy runs around the corner and heads towards you both.

“FREAK! THIS ISN’T OVER!”

“Thomas Hagan!”, a teacher yells, blocking him with her body so he can’t follow. 

The boy pauses as he leans against pole of the swings trying to catch his breath. 

“Are you alright?” He jumped as your hand reached out to touch his arm as he held them up defensively. “Hey. Hey, it’s ok. We won’t hurt you. I’m Y/N and this is Steve.” His chocolate eyes scanned you both over before finally sighing in relief when he realized you weren’t a threat.

“What’s your name?”

“E-Eddie. Eddie Munson.”

“Oh! You’re the kid that just started here. I’m sorry, man. Welcome to hell.”, Steve joked causing an exasperated laugh to leave Eddie’s lips. 

“Did Tommy do that to you?”, you ask as you gesture towards his black eye.

Shaking his head, he came over to sit on the swings beside you both. 

You couldn’t explain it at the time, not even now, but as you sat there talking to them you felt comfortable. You felt like you had known them your entire life. Nothing in this moment could have prepared you for the future that was headed towards you all. 

##########

1993

“Where up north are you, Stevie?”, Eddie asks as he takes a big bite of the burger in front of him. 

“I’ve been up in Detroit for a few months now working at a youth clinic. There’s a lot of good kids there who just need some help.”

“I’m proud of you, dude. We’re supposed to head over there to record with this big time producer. What about you, princess? Where do you call home?”

“I don’t actually have a home right now. I’m a writer for a music magazine so I’ve been on the road mostly for the past 2 years listening to bands and staying in hotels.”, you giggle as a huge smile adorns your face. “Maybe soon I’ll get to write about you, Eddie.”

“Here’s hoping. We just got signed but the manager at the label says we ‘really have something’.”

“Of course you do. You guys were always amazing.”

“Pfft, yeah sure. Drugged out me could barely focus on the strings let alone create a melody.” 

The table went silent as a heavy energy fell around the table. 

“How have things been? Any cravings?”, Steve asks as he folds his arms to lean forward on his elbows. 

“Oh, Harrington. I’m an addict. I always have cravings but choose to resist them.”

“Has it gotten any easier. To resist them, I mean.”, you inquire.

“Yes and no. I mean I used to snort blow 24/7 and now I don’t. I can go about my day and live my life but when something hard hits me or I’m having a bad day I have to physically talk myself out of not looking for a fix.”

“I can understand that. There were a few days where I sat outside of bar staring at the front door for hours before driving away.” His eyes flick towards you as he continues. “I still struggle with regret… regret that we…ruined your life.”

“You didn’t ruin my life. You definitely didn’t make it easy but… I should have left or cut ties beforehand. I just didn’t know how. I didn’t know how…to live without you two in my life.”

“Yeah. We get that to.”, Eddie sighed as a silence fell around the table. 

It had been a long time since the three of you had been together without the vices getting in the way or taking control. You had no idea how to be around them when they were sober. 

“Hey, uh, I have an idea if you two would be up for it.”, Steve grins as he tries to elevate the mood again. “Since the two of us will be in Detroit, why don’t you come with us, honey? Maybe the three of can hang out and spend some time together again. You’re even welcome to stay at my place. I don’t have a spare room but, Y/N, you can take my bed and the two of us can sleep in the living room or something.”

“Oh, Steve, I don’t want to impose—”

“No. No imposition whatsoever!”

“I can do that.”, Eddie confirms. 

“Ok. I’m ok with that.”

They both heavily exhale as if they had been holding their breath waiting for your answer. 

#########

1976

After getting into a fight with his father, Steve ran to your house knowing you’d make everything better. As soon as he showed up, you called Eddie who biked over as quickly as he could and after he arrived, you both listened intensely as the boy vented. 

“Everything’s going to be ok, Steve. You know you’re welcome to stay here.”, you try and soothe the boy as you wrap your arms around his shoulder. 

“Why am I never enough for that asshole?!”

“Because he’s just that; an asshole.”, Eddie quips making the other boy softly smile in his direction. 

“I should just do whatever I want to since I can never make him happy.”

“That’s a good idea. Oh! I’ll be right back.”, the boy grins at you both before running up your stairs. 

“Steve, you ARE amazing. I’m sorry he can’t see that but no matter you have us.” Grabbing his face, you kiss his cheek causing him to blush. 

Music starts to play and you both look up to see Eddie coming down the stairs with your bulky radio in his hand. Placing it on the bottom step, he stagers around in place as he begins to lip sync the lyrics. 

“I'll state my case, of which I'm certain I've lived a life that´s full I've traveled each and every highway And more, much more than this I did it my way.”

The guitar starts to play and Eddie pretends to strum as he jumps to the ground, continuing to sing as he dances around you both. 

“Regrets, I’ve had a few But then again, too few to mention I did, what I had to do And saw it through without exemption.”

Grabbing Steve’s hand, you do the same, dancing to the music as you three sing along.

“I planned each chartered course Each careful step along the highway And more, much more than this I did it my way.”

Eddie spins you and you laugh as you watch wide smiles paint their faces. You loved them both so much and knew after everything they go through they deserved happy, peaceful moments like this. To you, they deserved the world. 

***

The flight up to Detroit was uneventful but Steve did fill the time by telling you about some of the kids at the clinic he worked at while Eddie crashed beside him. His eyes lit up as he spoke, telling you about the turnaround a lot of them had made and how talented they all were. 

“Amanda is such a smart girl. She’s 15 and she can draw these beautiful pictures. I’m working on seeing if I can book a gallery or something for her to show her work. Right now, she draws for her mother works two jobs to help take care of them because the dad is a junkie.”

“What kind of things does she draw?”

“She can do portraits and people. She drew me once as this like superhero. I have the picture on my fridge.”

“That’s amazing.”, you beam up at him as he smiles to himself. “Steve, I really am proud of you…of both of you.”

“Thank you. That means a lot to me.”, he softly grins as his gaze shifts towards his lap. “I’m very proud of you as well. I’m glad you found something that makes you happy. When we were growing up you had mentioned writing before.”

“Yeah. I never knew what I wanted to write about but one day a guy I was dating overheard me talking about grunge metal and offered me a job.”

“Hm. Are you two still together?”

“Uh, no. We only dated for a couple of months. I’m not with anyone right now. No time.”, you chuckle trying to lighten the mood again. “What about you? Any future Mrs. Harringtons?”

“No. No future Mrs. Harringtons. I kind of spent time focusing on me and now the kids.”

“You have to be careful with that. You don’t want to fill one addiction with a new one and miss life entirely. I’m guilty of that those first three years after I left.”

***

You and Eddie enter Steve’s apartment slowly as you take a look around. It was a bit smaller than what you were used to when it came to him but he made it his own. There were posters of bands he enjoyed along the walls with some shelves lined with books he had read. In the corner of his living room was a desk with a few papers and pictures clients had drawn him over the years. A frame caught your eye and you bent down to get a good look as you took in his sobriety coins.

“Yeah, I, uh, bought one of these little frame things because it felt disrespectful to just throw them somewhere.”

“That’s amazing, dude.”, Eddie praised as he threw down his bag. “I, uh, I had an incident a few months back. I’m on the blue 6 month one but…”

“What happened, Ed?”

“Oh, um, nothing we need to get into, sweetheart. I did the proper protocol with my sponsor and she helped get me back on track.”

Steve patted his back comfortingly, knowing how hard it was and is to remain sober. Gesturing you down his hallway, he led you towards his bedroom and you grinned at the simplicity. 

“The bathroom is right in there and please both of you feel free to take anything from the kitchen. Me casa es su casa.”, he chuckles as he nervously runs his hands through his hair. “Sorry, that was cheesy.”

“Steve, you guys don’t have to try so hard. Just be yourselves.”

“That’s the thing isn’t it?”, Eddie sighs from his spot against the wall. “The three of us don’t exactly know who we are together anymore.”

You gently smile in his direction as you reach for his hand.

“We’re best friends. Always have been.”

######################

1980

“Eddie, why does that sound familiar?”, you grin from your spot on his bed where you had been listening to him strum his new guitar his uncle bought him at the pawn shop in town. 

After his run in with the lady in town today, Rick offered him something from his secret stash. He was amazed at how fast it began working, numbing the anger he was feeling and pushing him to a blissful state he didn’t want to experience alone.  

Grinning, he continues to move his fingers as his gentle voice fills your ears. 

“Baby, if I think about you I think about love Darlin', if I live without you I live without love.”

“They’ve been playing it on the radio nonstop.”, he chuckles, rolling his eyes.

“You sound amazing. I can’t wait to see you on that stage one day.”

“Pfft. Me? Al Munson’s trailer trash kid rocking it out on stage making millions of dollars and being successful?”

 Fueled with frustration, you grip his chin and force him to look at you. 

“Don’t ever let me hear you say anything like that again, Edward Munson. You are NOT trash and you’re nothing like your dad. You can be anything you want to be.”

“Yeah…tell that to people in this backwards town.”

“Fuck what these people think! I think you’re fantastic and so does Steve. You hung out with Rick today. I’m sure he thinks you’re an awesome friend.” Your eyes scan him over when all he does is nod. “Eddie, did something happen in town today? Did someone say something to you?”

His own beautiful, chocolate color hues stare past you for a moment before he blinks back into the moment and flashes you a big, tooth filled grin. 

“No, sweetheart. I guess I’m just feeling a little low today. I’m sorry.”

Running his fingers over the strings, he plays the song with much more vigor than before. 

“I would give you both night and day Love satisfyin'

Feel like makin' Feel like makin' love.”

“Mhmm. What do you know about makin’ love, Munson?”, you giggle allowing him to lighten the mood. 

“Oh, baby. I’m going to be a rockstar, remember? I know everything.”, he winks.

***

You smile as you sit in the booth watching Corroded Coffin play their music. Eddie was in a completely different zone as his fingers ran across the strings of his guitar. This was his dream; this is what he always wanted but always felt was out of reach. 

When he was in his drugged out haze you would watch him lazily try to play but stumble as his fingers trembled against the instrument. It killed you because you could always picture him on stage with a crowd full of people screaming his name. He just never believed it himself. 

“That was good, baby.”

“That was fucking garbage, Y/N. I barely played anything that would count as a note.”

“That was fantastic guys. Eddie, your band undersold your talent!”, the producer compliments making the metalhead blush. “Ok, let’s take lunch and we’ll come back in about an hour. There’s a cafeteria on the first floor if you guys are interested. It’s on me.”

“You sounded amazing.”, you grin as you meet him in the hallway. “I told you that you were going to be a rockstar one day.”

“Ha! I’m not quite there yet but thank you, sweetheart.”

After getting your food, you both sit and talk about the last couple of years. Eddie told you about some jobs he worked at in Indiana not wanting to be too far from the guys so they could practice and work on things together for the band. He mentioned Wayne and how well he was doing especially after being promoted to a higher position at his work. 

“He deserves it. Wayne always worked way too hard for almost no money and appreciation.”

“Tell me about it.”, he chuckles. “And of course, the first day he starts his new position, he gets a crush on one of the female employees underneath him!” 

That makes you laugh hard and he relishes the sound as his eyes watch you light up. That feeling of regret washes over him and he averts his gaze to his plate as he shuffles some food around.

“So, um, any rockstar boyfriends out there touring the world?”

“No, no boyfriend. I focused on myself more than anything and honestly haven’t had time for a full-blown relationship.”, you reply. “What about you? Any new girlfriends?”

“Naw, sweetheart. I’ve kind of been doing the same thing more or less.”, he answers sullenly. “Quite frankly, I haven’t met anyone who would be willing to sneak backstage of a Metallica show and pretend to be the building manager to get her boyfriend an autograph.”

This time when you laugh, he cackles with you and embraces the warm feeling that follows. 

“I told him it was for my kid.”, you blush. “God, hopefully I never have to write for them. I’ve been lucky so far but that will be an awkward exchange if they remember me!”

“Are you kidding, princess? You definitely leave an impression! Who could forget about you?” Eddie froze as he heavily exhaled and shook his head. 

“Y/N, I’m sorry…”

“No, Ed, it’s ok…”

“You would think I’d have this down by now but…”

You nod before you rise to your feet and get on his side of the table to sit beside him. 

Wrapping your arms around his neck, you lean your head on his shoulder as he reaches up to caress your arm.

#################

1980

Steve tenderly grins your way as he watches your eyes light up at the movie Kungfu you two had been watching. Well, you had been watching. He had been stuck in his own head after that ridiculous conversation with his dad. 

“Son, you’re about to start high school which means it’s time to really buckle down and focus. No more fucking around. If you want to run my company one day you can’t keep being lazy.”

While he had been talking there was a woman in his office waiting for him to give her attention. Her dress seemed way too tight and it inched up her thighs as she sat on top of his desk. Steve would never understand why his father cheated on his mother. To him, these women weren’t nearly half as pretty as her nor anywhere close to being as loyal as she was. 

His dad said he needed to ‘buckle down and focus’ but what he heard was ‘it’s time for you to start being like me’. 

Steve hadn’t planned on coming over but he felt weird after drinking the bottle he found. He thought booze were supposed to make you happy but he found himself feeling incredibly lonely. When he showed up unannounced, you opened your front door and eagerly ushered him with no hesitation. 

You always made them feel like they mattered. 

“Steve? Are you alright?”

“Huh? Yeah, I’m ok. Just thinking.”

“Did you want to watch something else? I put this on because I know the cheesy effects make you laugh.”, you giggle as his smile grows. 

“Naw, honey. This is fine. My dad was being…himself you know?”

“I know. You know you can always talk to me. I love you and I’m always here for you.”

Opening his arms wide, you fall into his embrace and he prays you don’t smell the liquor that lingers.

***

“Oh, wow. Look at you and you have your own shelf.”, you tease as Steve leads you into his office. 

After leaving Eddie so Corroded Coffin could continue recording, you headed to the center the other boy worked at so he could give you the “grand tour” as he called it. You grinned at the drawings and pictures he had posted everywhere around him. Multiple books and files were strewn out all over the place on his desk but a particular photo caught your eye. 

“Oh, um, yeah. I still keep that there as a reminder.”

Picking up the image of you three at the amusement park, you smile as you fall into the memory. They both seemed extremely content that day as if all their worries had disappeared. You thought about that day often to especially when you passed one on the tour bus you were riding in at the time. 

“The kids ask me about you two constantly.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah. Do you want to meet them?”

When you nod, his grin stretches across his face as he giddily grabs your hand and guides you to a much larger room where some kids were already sitting around waiting. 

“Mr. Harrington brought a date to group!”

“Look at Hugh Hefner over here!”

“’Bout time you settle down, old man!”

“Alright, alright. All of you settle down.”, Steve jokes as you laugh. “This is my friend from Hawkins I tell you guys about. This is Y/N.”

“You’re the girl he doesn’t shut up about.”, a young lady smiles. 

“That would be Amanda.”

“I know you. He told me all about you on the ride up here. Your work is amazing.”

“Thank you!”, she beams.

Taking a seat beside Steve, you watch as he conducts the group session, introducing each kid and responding where appropriate. You couldn’t help but marvel at his change as he took control and seemed way more confident than he ever did back home. 

There was no one he needed to impress or a “legacy” he needed to live up to. He could just be himself.

“Please, Katie. Trust me, your mom doesn’t fucking care. That’s why she drinks.”

“Derek.”, Steve warned. “That’s not how we talk to each other in here.”

Your eyes scanned over the boy across from you. He couldn’t be older than 17 but he seemed to carry years of anger and burden on his shoulders. His arms were folded tight around his chest; a barrier to protect him from anyone trying to get in. Emphasized by the oversized hoodie that he kept up over his head. 

You knew this boy; you had been him.

“What? Am I wrong? If she cared she’d stop fucking binge drinking every night and actually spend time with her daughter.”

“Who in your family drinks? Mom or dad?”

All eyes turn to you after you pose your question.

“My dad. Why? Does it matter?”

“Yes, it does. I know how hard it is…to have someone you love choose substances over you. It fucking hurts.”

“Look, I don’t need another adult to patronize to me, okay?”

“She’s not. If anyone understands what you guys are going through it’s Y/N. Especially you, Derek. Remember how I told you guys about my accident and DUI? Y/N was…was in the car with me.” Steve stumbles over his words before quickly trying to regain control again. 

“Hm. Did you rat him out? Is that why he’s clean now? Are you going to tell me I should be open and honest or some shit?”, the boy spat.

“No, I didn’t. I actually told the police I didn’t remember who was driving. Took a couple of weeks though because I needed surgery after metal from the car sliced through me. He never even came to the hospital.”

“Wow, Mr. Harrington. You were an asshole.”, a girl sighed. 

“I was wasted and terrified. I couldn’t face what I did to someone I loved.”

Derek’s eyes were suddenly glassy as he adjusted his body in his seat.

“He does love you, honey.”, you coo towards the boy as his bottom lip quivers. “If it were as easy as putting the bottle or drug down they would. Some people can but for others it’s so much harder. Whether they heal or not is ultimately up to them but no matter what happens, Derek, none of it is your fault.”

The young man sighs as he breaks down and the girl beside him wraps her arms around him as he cries. A palm touches yours and you turn your head to see Steve’s soft eyes taking you in. 

You see the never-ending apology within them as flashes of the old boy you knew before the booze pushed through before receding as he flashes you a gentle grin and lifts his hand. 

################

1983

“Guys, really? Do we have to eat all this before going on the rollercoaster?”, you giggle as you watch Eddie pour more cheese over the nachos in front of you three.

“Yes, sweetheart, we do.”, he answers in a serious tone as his tongue pokes out of the corner of his mouth. 

“And the cherry on top.” 

Steve produces a cupcake from his side and places it in front of you as the metalhead pushes a candle through the top of the frosting. You smile as Steve cups his hands around it while Eddie pulls out his lighter and ignites the wick. 

“Now make a wish and blow out your candle.”

Your gaze shifts between their happy faces as they wait for you to complete the task. 

“I wish everyday could be like today.”

As you blow it out, both boys clap and cheer making you blush as Steve kisses your cheek. 

“Happy birthday, beautiful.”

Eddie leans over to take hold of your jaw and peck your lips before sitting back down. 

“Happy Birthday, princess. Now, you eat this while sire and I devour this here.”

“Why do I have to and she doesn’t?”

“Because it’s her birthday, Steven! No stop whining and say Ah!”

As the boy scowls he unhooks his jaw and Eddie shoves a chip into his mouth making you laugh as you lean against him. 

“Oh my god, you two are ridiculous! I love you so much.”

***

You laugh hard at the joke Eddie had made as Steve struggles to keep soda inside his mouth while he cackles with you. 

“I really missed you guys.”, the metalhead announces, his gaze shifting between you both. “I mean I’ve made a lot of new friends you know but I talk about the things we used to do like me doing Karaoke to make Steven laugh or you and I, Y/N, going to the horror movie marathon just outside of town.”

“I remember that. That was so much fun.”, you smile. 

“One of the things I enjoy about my job is interacting with those kids. Most of them are sarcastic as fuck like you, Ed, or extremely kind like, Y/N. Thank you for what you did with Derek today by the way. He struggles to talk about his relationships with anyone let alone about his dad.”

“May I ask what happened? You mentioned our accident…”

“Um, yeah. It was kind of the same thing. His dad hit a car with him in it while drunk, ran from the scene, and Derek took the blame. His dad begged him to before he bolted…kid was only 15.”

“Jesus.”, Eddie sighed. “Sounds like my dad.”

“He seems like a good boy. He’ll be okay.” You flash him a comforting grin and he can’t help but smile back. “I, um, I feel like we keep ignoring the elephant in the room. I want you to know I am genuinely so proud of you both. Steve I never imagined you’d be as confident as you seem now. You always told me you thought you were worthless and I know that’s because of your asshole dad. I watched for years as you lived in his shadow but were still so terrified of becoming him… Those kids don’t have to experience that because they have you now.”

“Eddie, you were always afraid of people abandoning you and numbed yourself constantly. When you were numb you were so angry and heartbroken. When I saw you playing your guitar again with your band… you finally seemed at peace.” 

Your voice cracked as a tear escaped your eye and you awkwardly laughed as you wiped it away. 

“That’s all I ever wanted for you two.”

“6 months ago… when I relapsed… I was in such a low place. My apartment I was staying in got robbed, I had just been let go from a job I was at, and this girl I was dating said she didn’t want to see me anymore. She said I was loser and it fucking hurt like hell. I felt so alone and it was almost like a dream. I barely even remember where I bought the drugs or how I got back home but as soon as it hit my nose I regretted it.”

“Y/N, I saw your face and everything I wished I could take back. The fights, the names, the pain… The way we talked to you.” He cringed as memories flashed through his mind.

“I get that. Of course, my biggest regret is the accident but the one I think about the most is the first time we were intimate when we…I…” You looked at Steve with sincere confusion not thinking anything of that night. Then again compared to all the others you had after it was just a blip in a chaotic timeline. “Y/N, honey, you lost your virginity on my couch after threatening to leave us because of the jugs of liquor you found in my trash.”

“We should have done it right. I picture us taking you to dinner and you’d be wearing that red dress we loved.”

“Yeah, that one floofed out above your knees kind of like a tutu.”, Eddie chuckled. “With your hair up in a ponytail so we could so your face. You always wore make up but you never needed to. You were…are… so beautiful.”

“How are you two dressed?”, you murmur their way.

“Let’s see. I’d probably have my jeans and black shirt but I would have made sure it was clean with little to no cigarette smell.”, the metalhead jests causing you two to let out a little laugh.

“I’d have worn jeans to but a nice polo shirt I think to go with it and that expensive cologne my dad kept buying me.”, he smirked. “We’d take you to Enzos because you deserve a nice meal but of course you would complain about the prices even though we insist it’s no problem.”

“Some soft music would be playing and we’d ask you to dance.”

Steve rises to his feet and messes with his stereo till a slow 70s song flows through his speakers. Extending his hand to you, you take it as he pulls you to your feet and places one of his palms on your lower back as he holds the other in the air. 

“Is this ok?”, he whispers under his breath, exhaling heavily in relief when you nod. “I would tell you about how I fell in love with you the first time I met you. You said all the girls in your class had a crush on me but I didn’t get it. I think I said something along of the lines ‘I’m not that great.’ And you said—”

“I don’t know. You seem pretty great to me.”

He tenderly smiles at your response before grabbing your hand to spin you and pass you to Eddie who was waiting with open arms. 

“I would have probably made a joke about the music saying that dancing to Dio is way better.” He smiles when you giggle. “I’d tell you that the first time I saw you I thought you were way too good for me. I remember you asked about my black eye my dad had given me and it surprised me. Every other adult already assumed or were afraid to ask, staring at me constantly. But you actually fucking cared.”

“Then what would happen?”

Eddie passed you back to Steve and this time you wrapped your arms around his waist, pressing your head against his chest. You didn’t see it but he and the metalhead exchanged a glance filled with slight worry as he held you and leaned his cheek on top of your head. 

“Y/N, honey—”

“You don’t have to answer. I can let you go, we can get ready for bed, and go back to being friends. We’ll always be at least that because I agree with Eddie. I miss you two so much but unlike the first time I left…I don’t feel bad about it.” 

Pulling away from him, you back up a bit to address them both. 

“I’m happier than I’ve ever been and you were right in the letter you left me. I had some more healing to do to. I needed to find out who I was without you and now that I figured that out…I want to see if…maybe…we can start over. I mean we’ve all grown so much and I’d like to get to know the two men in front of me.”

Their eyes continually scan over you, trying to understand and get a true read to make sure you’re alright.

“But like I said, you don’t have to. We can go back to laughing or go to sleep. If it makes you feel better, you taking my virginity that morning…I don’t remember it being a bad experience. Yeah it hurt but it was going to for me anyway and not just because I was virgin.”, you tease, smirking their way.

You were surprised when Eddie was the first to move, taking agonizingly slow steps till he was directly in front of you with his nose hovering just above your own. After blinking a couple of times, he pulled you into his embrace and you closed your eyes as you inhaled his signature smell while clinging your arms around him. 

“I love you.”, you whisper. As if your words were a match, they ignited the metalhead’s passion as his hands tilted your head back and he kissed your lips. As if muscle memory was taking over, you clung to his neck as you jumped up into his arms and his hands promptly took hold of your thighs as your legs wrapped around him. 

As he starts to carry you, his feet give out underneath him as he trips over something and you both tumble to the floor. He manages to keep himself from crushing you as his palms shoot out to catch himself on the hard wood. 

“Fuck! Shit, I’m so sorry. I forgot for a moment this wasn’t my place.”, he chuckles shakily. “Are you alright?”

“Yeah, I’m fine.”, you laugh.

“I feel like a fucking teenager. I’m actually…I don’t know…nervous.”

“Would it…make you feel better if I admitted I’m nervous to? It’s been a while for me and if I’m being honest I think I’ve only been with you guys sober that one time but that was after that intense session. We’ve never been together…like this.”

Wind moves your hair and you both turn to see Steve laying out one of his blankets with a couple of pillows on the floor. 

“I wish I had lost my virginity to you.”, he admitted. “I was wasted and I’m ashamed to say I don’t even remember the girl’s name. I think you’re the only girl…woman… I’ve been with sober.”

“I was half awake.”, Eddie sighed. “Karla something in the back of my van. I barely remember it either.”

“Were you rough with the other girls like you were me?”, you asked.

“Sometimes but you were the only one that seemed to enjoy it.”

“Did you?”, the metalhead asked. “We never even asked what you liked in bed. Just kind of did our own thing…”

“I did and I didn’t. I hated when we did it after a fight. Kind of like that night we went to Steve’s house after spending time at The Hideout. Eddie said I wanted to fuck Andrew and Steve, you got mad at me because I defended you in front of your dad. You said I butted in and made things worse. You both said you were going to use me one last time before I abandoned you.”

“And I choked you too hard…”

“Sometimes if you both were angry enough the line would blur.”

Steve’s head hung knowing he was the culprit of most of your verbal sparring matches with him. He cringed every time he thought about the awful things he had said to you while drunk. 

Scooting closer to him, your hand reached out to grab his chin lifting his face so you could see his eyes. 

“I love you to.” The man sighed as your thumb caressed his bottom lip. “Show me the men you are now.”

When his lips connected with yours, you wanted to cry because for the first time in a long time you felt safe. Your tongues mingled together as his hips grinded down against yours eliciting a soft moan as you turned your head to find Eddie. Steve’s mouth continued to travel to your neck as he clung to you, your fingers threading through his hair as the metalhead leaned down to kiss the other side. 

Kisses and stolen touches were exchanged as clothes were removed, you not wanting them to be too far for very long as their lips refamiliarized them with your body. Lifting your legs open wide over both their hips, you mewled as their fingers ran delicately up your thighs. 

“This is what we should have done.”, Steve whispered in your ear. “We should have taken our time with you; made you feel more comfortable.”

“Made you feel good and help prepare you.”, Eddie added as he tenderly kissed your cheek and the side of your face. 

When his thick fingers slide into your core, your eyes rolled as your head dipped back. Both your palms ran along cocks and the sound of their groans in your ears had you clenching tightly around his digits. When Steve joined his friend and massaged fast circles into your clit, you knew you wouldn’t last long.

“Fuck, please. Just like that.”

They each grinded against you, desperate for relief as the sound of your slick filled the room as they picked up their pace. 

“That’s it, honey. Cum for us.”

“We got you, pretty girl.”

Your body trembled as you came, your lips searching for theirs as their fingers guided you through. 

“Fuck, that was sexy.”, Steve panted against your lips as he maneuvered himself on top of you. “Wait, fuck, do I need…I may have some condoms somewhere…”

“No. It’s ok. I’m still on the pill.”

Softly grinning down at you, he places a peck on your lips before trailing kisses along your cheek and to your ear. 

“We should have asked that first time. We didn’t even bother. We were so afraid you really were going to leave…”, he whispered. Reaching between your bodies, he gripped the base of his cock and gradually guided it into your core. “Oh my God, Y/N.”

Steve groans as your pussy stretches to accommodate his size and the memory of that evening smacks into you like a ton of bricks. 

“Steve, you’re so big. It won’t fit—”

“It will, honey, I promise…”

“Just go slow and keep talking to me.”

“No, no, baby. You’re ok. Eddie, fuck, can you—”

“Are you ok, sweetheart?”

“Hurts.”

“Hey, are you alright? I’m not hurting you, am I?”

Tears start to fall from your eyes but as the man lifts himself up to pull out and comfort you, you wrap your arms around him to hold him to you. 

“I’m ok. Don’t stop, please, and don’t stop talking to me. You feel so good… I just…I love you.”

His heart flutters at your admission every time he hears you say it. They both thought they had lost you forever and rightfully so but to know they have a chance… they weren’t going to waste it this time. 

Steve slowly began pumping his hips, relishing the feeling of you clinging to him again. 

“I love you to, baby. This is how I should have taken you that first time, nice, slow, and—fuck—so deep. Your pussy so fucking tight as it pulls me in. I can feel you everywhere, Y/N, you’re so warm and wet. You take my cock so well…such a good girl.”

Your eyes rolled as you clenched at the name. With anyone else you had been with you never allowed them to play rough or tell you things like how good of a girl you were or anything like that. It reminded you of them and truth be told you only really believed it when they said it. You didn’t want to push them but you wanted them to know it was ok to be a bit more passionate when it came to you. 

“I’m your good girl?”, you whimper making him moan. 

“Fuck, yeah, honey. You’re our good girl.”

“Then fuck me like a good girl deserves, Steve.” As his head falls between your neck and shoulder, your fingers cling to his hair as he thrusts his cock into you a bit harder than before. “That’s it. Just like that.”

Your eyes swiveled to look for Eddie, finding him beside you both stroking his length as he waited. The sight drove you wild as the other man moved at a faster rhythm, pounding into that sensitive spot inside you that had your jaw going slack. 

“Please…please, Steve. I’m gonna cum.”

Reaching for your hands, he pinned them above your head as he held them in his own, intertwining his fingers with yours as he sucked little marks on to your neck. 

The coil in your belly snapped as you repeatedly moaned his name, his lips hastily meeting yours to swallow your moans as he chased his high. 

“Can I swallow your cum, baby? Please?”

He doesn’t respond as his eyes stare into your own but as his hips sputter he quickly pulls out of you and crawls up your body to push his dick into your awaiting mouth. His fingers tangle in your hair as you bob your head and he mewls as he spills his release down your throat. 

As he backs away from you, you sit up and kiss his lips, his palms cupping your face as he holds you close to him. After caressing his cheek and silently assuring him you were alright, you shimmed your way to the metalhead and wrapped your arms around his neck as he adjusted himself till you were sitting on top of him straddling his waist. 

“It was my first time with the woman I loved and I didn’t even get to see your face.”, Eddie murmured as his hands traveled down your sides to rest on your thighs. “I barely even checked in to make sure you were ok.”

As he spoke, you continued to look down at him as you dragged your pussy lips along his cock.

“I should have had you on top of me just like this so I could see you and you could see me. See that beautiful face scrunch right here when you slide me in.” He smiles when you giggle as he pokes your forehead. “Fuck, Y/N, I missed a lot of things but nothing more than your laugh, sweetheart.”

Your heart skipped a beat as you tilted down to kiss his lips and his palms clung to the base of your neck as you guided your hips down onto his length. 

“I love you, Eddie.”

“Mmm—I love you to, pretty girl.” Subtly bouncing on top of him, you both mewled as his tip hit that soft spot repeatedly. “There you go, princess. Still so fucking tight.”

Your eyes searched his face as he licked his lips and arched his neck, the veins along his throat making you moan. 

“Spank me.”, you plead as your nose grazes his. “I promise it’s ok.”

His eyes fully open, meeting your own as you place his hands on your behind. Gauging your reaction, he kneads your meaty flesh as he guides your movements.

“Fuck, baby. You look so sexy riding my dick. Make yourself cum. I want to feel your pussy squeezing me.”

Bouncing as hard as you can, your head falls on his shoulder as his palm spanks your ass and he feels your warm breath heat his skin. 

“A-Again, Eddie. Just like that.”

Ring laced fingers take hold of the back of your neck as his other arm circles around your waist to hold you still as he plants his feet and thrusts up into you meeting your motions with a hard one of his own. 

“Like that, Y/N? That the spot? I know, sweetheart, I got you.”

That wasn’t the first time he had ever said those words to you but this was the first time you ever believed him. 

“Say it again.”

His head turned slightly to kiss your temple as he softly murmured his last sentence till you tumbled over the ledge and he spanked you again as he helped you ride your high. Leaning back on your knees, he followed you and you hugged his head to your chest as you rolled your hips till you felt him warm your insides. 

His lips roamed your skin as he guided your sweaty bodies on your sides. A second set of welcomed kisses glided along your shoulder blade as you felt yourself slowly drift off into bliss. 

###############

1982

“Fuck, why am I nervous? We’ve known her since like 4th grade.”, Steve hyped himself up as they sat outside your door in his car. 

“Yeah, but this is different. We’ve never looked at her that way before and vice versa.”, Eddie sighed.

“I mean…I always thought she was beautiful. I just…what would a perfect girl like that want with an asshole like me?”

“Steve, you’re not a…well you’re a little bit of an asshole.”, the metalhead teases making his friend laugh. “I get it though. She’s perfect to me to and deserves more than some trailer trash felon’s kid.”

As his hands begin to shake, he reaches into his leather jacket for his pack of cigarettes.

“Are you alright?”

“I’m ok. I just haven’t had a hit all day and I’m jumpy. I wanted to be sober for our first date with her.”

Steve smiled at his friend as he flashes him his jacket pocket. 

“Same. No flask or any alcohol.” Eddie nodded as he patted the man’s shoulder. “You’re not trailer trash, Munson. I hope you know that. You’ve been my best friend to and I’ve never once seen you that way. I love ya, man.”

“Aw. I love you to, Harrington.”, he replies in a high pitch sing song voice before glancing out the window. “Thank you. I don’t know where I’d be without you guys.”

Grinning, they both hop out of the car and knock on your door, their jaws dropping when you greet them in a beautiful blue dress they had never seen on you before. 

“Wow, you two look handsome.”

“We don’t look half as good as you. Oh my god.”, Steve compliments making you blush. 

Eddie extends his arm like he had seen so many times in movies, his smile widening when you loop your own through it and lean over to kiss his cheek. 

#############

You woke up to the sound of beeping as your eyes opened in search of the noise. Steve groaned as he rolled over, blindly searching before holding up his watch, and pushing the button to silence it. 

“Do you have to go to work?”, you whisper, smiling when he shakes his head and turns back onto his side reminding you of the little boy who used to do sleep overs with you in elementary school. 

As you try to face him as well, you realize a tattooed arm is laying across your chest and glance over to see Eddie on his tummy with his messy hair blocking his face. Tenderly, you reach over to move it to the side, rousing him from sleep as he scrunches his nose and blinks before pulling you closer to him till his nose was pressed against your cheek. 

The first time you met him his hair was extremely short and he had bruises everywhere. When he came to your house, you could tell he felt out of place but you extended your hand and allowed him to hold it if he felt uncomfortable. Those first couple of times he stayed over, you would wake up with the back of his palm near yours. 

Fingers tracing your skin bring you back to the present as your eyes meet Steve’s and he smiles as he runs them up your arm and down your stomach. Your breathing hitches when you feel the tips along the scar on your stomach. 

“Does it still hurt?”

“Sometimes…when it rains or snows… or when I dream about it…” His amber eyes scan your face as you continue. “Those are the two experiences I think about a lot still. You two screaming at each other before leaving me and finding Eddie ODed…”

The man’s thumb caressed your skin as he kissed your skin.

“I’m sorry, sweetheart.”

“I meant what I said before that night two years ago. I forgive you both. This past week just hearing and seeing how far you two have come… I loved you both so much but I never felt safe. Last night and right now… I feel like it’s finally safe for me to let go and trust you again. If you want that…if you want me…”

Eddie’s lips abruptly crash to your own before kissing your nose and up to your forehead. 

“I love you so much, Y/N. I will always want you, baby. I promise you ARE safe with me. I got you.”

Steve lightly grips your chin, turning you to face him as he kisses your lips as well. 

“I love you, honey, and you are all I’ve ever wanted. You’re safe with me to and you both are more than welcome to stay here or we can look for a bigger place. Whatever we have to do, I’m in.”

You held them both to you as the tears began to flow, thankful that your lives would no longer be trapped in memories but new beginnings with the two people you loved the most and loved you. 

################

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[anki-of-beleriand]

A Heart Made of Glass ch.9

Summary: Ten years ago you left Wanda and the Avengers to heal your broken heart. You never stopped being a hero, just as you never stopped being in love with her. But life had to go on.

Now, after all that time, she is back and with her is a young woman needing help and an enemy that may not be as afraid as Wanda to lay a claim on you.

Pairings: Wanda Maximoff x Powered!F!Reader - Scarlet Witch x PoweredF!Reader - Past Wanda Maximoff x Vision - Powered!F!Reader x Carol Danvers

Warnings: Angst, drama, mentions of cheating, fluff, violence, smut, Switch!Reader, internalize homophobia, religious fanatisms, homopobia, hurt, comfort, Wanda being a complete mess, anger management issues, jealousy, Requited/Unrequited love, idiots in love, swearing, mentions of alcohol, violence, multiverse travelling. More tags as the story progess.

Author's Note: This story is a continuation of Dirty Little Secret I was really surprised at the response I got for the story, I did all the tags you guys ask for but if I forgot someone please do not hesitate to tell me. Thank you for the support.

I'm back!

And Carol Danvers is back as well. i'm sorry for the long delay, guys. But this chapter gave me some trouble before making some decisions as to where I wanted to take the story. I hope you like this new chapter, you will have action, flashbacks, and finally the worlds collide.

Remember that English is not my mother tongue so I apologise for the grammar, spelling and funny mistakes.

Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Chapter 3 - Chapter 4 - Chapter 5 - Chapter 6 - Chapter 7 - Chapter 8 - Chapter 10

Chapter 9

The breaking of the storm

Three months ago – Stark Cabin - Fairburn, Georgia

It didn’t take her too long to locate the cabin.

She stood by the road for a very long time, debating with herself if it would be appropriated to approach the man living there. She was still wearing the clothes she wore to the funeral; the tears were still fresh on her face and the many memories in her mind were threatening to overwhelm her all over again.

The world had changed in the last five years she had been absent.

And yet, many things were still the same.

The service had been sweet, with a long sermon giving by an old priest that praised Steve for his courage and his life. Wanda had almost broken when the priest mentioned Bucky and how Steve’s love for him had made him stronger in the times of need. She listened as everything was revealed, as the lovers were uncovered in front of friends and family, and she realized right there and then everybody knew about it. And everybody accepted it, embraced it, and celebrated it.

“Sooner or later, Wanda, you will need to face the truth…than in all of this, it was you the only one that thought it inappropriate, that punished herself for something as pure as loving another human being.”

Steve’s words resounded inside her mind; Wanda had come to terms with what she couldn’t in her youth. Not only the mistakes of her past actions, but also to the thoughts she allowed herself to govern her decisions, in all reality, just as Steve had told her, her family would have never stopped loving her even if she chose another woman to be by her side. To be the love of her life, to marry and form a family with.

Times had certainly changed, and by the time Wanda had made a decision about her life and what she needed it to do, Thanos had come, and she had missed five years of her life. The sound of birds above her head broke her remembrance of another time; she shook her head and tried to step forward but was unable to do so.

Wanda Maximoff hesitated with her hands inside her pockets, the key to the old Avenger compound wrapped tightly around her hand. She chewed on her lower lip, turning around ready to leave until her eyes fell upon a young girl. She was no older than five years old, with auburn hair, and curious eyes she stood there glancing at Wanda while holding onto a metal glove that fit her small hand.

“Are you lost?” She asked, tilting her head, Morgan Stark took a step closer to the redhead while glancing left then right.

Wanda pressed her lips together shaking her head, “no, I’m not.”

Morgan furrowed her brows, her eyes narrowing slightly though her stance did not lose the easiness she carried with her. Wanda could see much of Stark in the young girl, there was intelligence behind her eyes and also a sense of confidence Wanda never possessed at her age.

“Then, what are you doing?” Morgan asked, this time around she pursed her lips pointing to the cabin. “Are you looking for daddy?”

Wanda sighed glancing down the road, her breath caught in her throat when her clear eyes fell upon the form of Tony Stark. The man was standing by the entrance of the cabin, his eyes completely focused on her and Morgan. With an uncomfortably shifted stance, Wanda glanced back to the girl that still had her eyes on her.

“Yes, I am.”

Morgan broke into an easy smile; she approached Wanda taking her hand in hers while dragging her all the way to the cabin.

“Silly, you can’t stay here. Daddy is having his afternoon tea.”

Tony Stark stood by the porch in his cabin, his heart had almost stopped the moment he realized Morgan had gone all the way to greet the strange newcomer only to realize this newcomer was no other than Wanda Maximoff. In his mind, five years had passed, but the old wounds as well as Wanda’s old transgressions were still fresh in Stark’s mind; he had not forgotten the moment she broke Y/N’s heart. Nor did he forget the fact Wanda sided with Steve when the world needed them the most; seeing her walking down the road with his daughter by her side only made him shiver in anticipation, his hand getting ready to access his armor if necessary.

“Wanda.” He couldn’t hide the coldness in his voice, the young woman winced trying to let go of Morgan’s hand but the young girl refused the gesture taking her past Tony.

“Come! Mommy brought some cupcakes and daddy has to eat his tea or he gets cranky.” Morgan turned to Tony, the innocence in her eyes didn’t allow her to notice the obvious tension between Wanda and Tony.

The man straightened up, his jaw clenching tightly while his eyes let Wanda know she was not welcomed. Wanda knew this, of course. She was risking a lot by reaching out to Tony, but in all honestly, he was her last option.

She didn’t have anyone else.

She was alone. Completely and utterly alone.

Tony dropped his shoulders placing a hand on Morgan’s head, before pointing with his head the house.

“Well, I guess we are stuck with one another for the time being.”

“You don’t have to…” Wanda started, but Tony shook his head.

“Morgan wants you here, come on.”

The house was like nothing Wanda remembered of Tony. There were many electronic devices and gadgets that Tony had adapted to his home, but otherwise this looked like a normal place. Nothing too fancy, and nothing too ostentatious. It was strange to set foot in a place that was not as extravagant as Tony had been once.

“I hope you two are…Wanda? What are you doing here?” Pepper stood by the hall with a tray filled with pastries and two white cups filled with tea.

Wanda offered a weak smile; her heart shrank at the incommodity this situation generated in her. She wished she had thought this through, but in reality, there was nothing she could do. She had been so lost at the funeral, she had been so devastated when she saw Y/N in the arms of another, when she realized after Steve’s death, she was alone.

“I’m sorry to come uninvited, Pepper.” She all but whispered. “I will be out of here in no time, I just…”

Pepper had been frowning at the young woman all this time, but something in her voice and her posture made Pepper softened slightly. She offered a motherly smile pointing to the love chair on the living room.

“Take a seat, Wanda, I will bring another cup of tea.”

Teatime went by uneventfully.

Morgan ended up filling up the silence with her stories, and the adults merely spoke whenever she spoke to them. Wanda couldn’t help the tension growing as the time passed, and the eyes of Tony kept on pinning her with anger and questions. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, Pepper grabbed Morgan and left Tony and Wanda alone.

“You have some nerve coming in here, Wanda.” Tony finally commented leaning back on his chair. “I thought by now you would have left to get the normal life you have always wanted. Though, now that Vision is no longer alive, I guess you don’t have much from were to choose, am I right?”

Wanda winced at his honesty, she knew Tony and Natasha had been always advocates of Y/N and had always stood by her side after the incident. The young woman couldn’t help the tears pooling out her eyes, she swallowed down her sadness, trying to collect herself to start talking.

But she couldn’t.

“I…I…am sorry.” Wanda let down a whimper, her tears rolling down her eyes as the pain in her chest became unbearable. She stood on shaky legs, shaking her head while trying to make her way to the door. “I sh-shouldn’t…I will…I will leave…”

But as she said this, her heart crumbled and soon she was on the floor with Tony Stark wrapping his arms around her. Of all the people that she had gotten to know, Tony was the last one she ever thought would comfort her. They had such a troublesome past; she had hated him for so long only to develop respect and then a shaky form of friendship that had always been on the rocks for as long as they had fought on the side.

Now, Wanda couldn’t stop crying and Tony had acted out of instinct.

Wanda cried for herself, for the time she lost. For the things she had done, for Steve because he would no longer be there to comfort her and to be the family she had lost. For Y/N because she hated Wanda, and Wanda knew that regardless of her wrongdoings and her mistakes, she was still pretty much in love with her. Wanda cried because she let her old beliefs, and the words of sin and forbidden governed her decisions at some point.

Wanda cried because she was alone, and she had come to a world in which she was not welcome.

And then, when she thought nothing good could come of this meeting, she had the very same man she had always thought insufferable and narcissistic comforting her. Then a pair of small arms wrapped around her, and soon Wanda felt, for the very first time in a long time, the warmth of a family trying to pick up the pieces of her heart and lonely soul.

*****

Night had already fallen, and Morgan was already in bed by the time Wanda had stopped crying.

The warmth of the mug between her hands brough comfort to her cold chest, she glanced at the fire while trying to ease out her breathing and hearing Tony talk about what had happened after the Blip. She heard about his fight with Steve, how he had given his back to the Avengers to go and form a family with Pepper, how the world crumbled in the very first year before it started building itself.

Tony talked about Steve and Natasha, how they struggled to keep the team alive, to try and look for a solution while also helping the rest of the universe with the help of Rocket and Carol Danvers. He talked about Y/N, and Wanda couldn’t help the fluttering of her heart at the mention of Y/N and how she had been affected by the Blip, how she had met Carol and the bond had been formed.

“She missed you.” Pepper ignored the glare coming from Tony, her eyes were solely on Wanda who was looking back at her with a hopeful glint in her eyes. “Y/N was in a dark place after she saw you vanished into thin air.”

Wanda furrowed her brows at this, “she…she was there?”

Pepper and Tony nodded, and Wanda tried to remember that moment.

She knew you had arrived because your shadows had invaded the battlefield for a moment, but she never imagined you had gone and looked for her. Wanda never imagined Y/N had seen her disappear. Tony shifted on his chair pursing his lips while facing Wanda, his eyes demanding.

“She took it hard and was not the same for a while. Up until she and Carol started seeing one another.” Wanda winced at these words; she looked away trying to hide her pain, but Tony had already seen it. “What are you doing here, Wanda?”

Wanda glanced at the beverage in the mug, she thought about you for a long time. She thought about your voice and laughter, how happy you had seemed with the blond-haired woman back at the funeral. The young woman lifted her face, new tears rolling down her cheeks.

“I’m…I came here to ask for your permission.” She finally said, Tony blinked confusedly at her.

“Permission for what?”

“The…the Avengers compound.” Wanda mumbled. “I know it’s still active but empty and…I… I really don’t have a place to stay. I just…”

“You are alone.” Tony stated not without a tone of reproach in his tone. “This is your own doing, Wanda. I hope you know that.”

Wanda didn’t react at all, but her lips broke into a broken smile.

“I made so many mistakes, Tony.” Wanda all but whispered. “The only thing I did right was…was being with her.”

“And yet, you broke her heart in the worst possible way.” Tony replied, the old anger dripping from his words.

“I know.” Wanda placed a hand on her forehead, she had nothing to lose at the moment and her words came rushing in. Not to give an explanation, she didn’t think her actions have one, but she just needed to let everything out.

For the very first time, she would talk with all honestly to someone that wasn’t Steve.

“I was so afraid to give in, to allow myself to be seen with her.” Wanda hiccupped placing a hand on her mouth, tears rolling silently down her cheeks. “My mother…my father…They always talked to me about sin, I knew what I had always feel, what I am…was a sin. Papa found me once, and he…I never forgot his lesson. I knew I was wrong, and when I saw her and knew I couldn’t breathe without Y/n I just…I was failing papa and mama…you know?”

Wanda shook her head, a gasp leaving her lips while her hand closed tightly around her chest.

“I had failed them, they had died, and I had failed them…time and time again, I failed and then…” Wanda shrugged. “I fell in love with her and I just…I let my family die, I couldn’t…I couldn’t be happy, I shouldn’t…I should do what they wanted of me I just…”

Pepper softened her features, watching the confusion, the conflict running wildly through those green eyes. But Tony remained impassive, hearing everything without giving anything away.

“I just…I couldn’t let them down, them and Pietro and…god, Y/N was just…I was feeling so much…I realized I wanted to have her children, that I wanted…I wanted to leave my powers and…” Wanda suddenly looked desperate, lost, and hopeless. “I know I mess up, Tony, I’m not asking for your forgiveness...I just…I just need a home.”

Wanda broke at the very end; Tony lowered his gaze before settling his eyes on Pepper. For the very first time, Tony wondered what would have happened if Pepper had given up on him. How many times had she discovered him with another woman, how many times she had seen him flirt his way through the parties before he realized that Pepper was all he needed. Y/N had been hurt deeply by Wanda, it was quite evident Wanda didn’t know the extent of Y/N’s feelings for her or what she was ready to do for Wanda.

And yet, Wanda was ready to do the same, but her mind was being tormented by old believes, and the fear of failing her family. The fear of falling into sin, of being less than what was expected of her.

“I know I’m going to pay my whole life for my mistakes, Tony. I know she…” Wanda wrapped her hands tightly around the mug, lowering her gaze she continued with a shaky voice. “I have broken everything that was good for me, and I deserve to be alone. I just…I’m tired.”

Tony stood up making his way to where Wanda was sitting, he knelt down placing a single hand on hers. His face was solemn, and for the very first time he allowed himself to see Wanda the way she was. A young woman lost, not knowing what to do or what road to follow, someone who wanted to be loved, but that didn’t want to fail those she loved anymore.

Ten years were a long time for him to keep a grudge, and for Wanda to still being put down and being ripped from what she really wanted.

“You can stay here tonight, Wanda.” Tony squeezed her hand comfortingly. “You have a home here, and we can talk more tomorrow. The compound is yours if you want to, but for now let me take you to your room. You must be really tired.”

Wanda wrapped her arms around Tony, a small weight lifted from her heart, and a huge void in her soul filled by the affection she felt for the man hugging her tightly. After that day, Wanda would spend five more days in Tony’s home, and she would cry while trying to let out everything she had kept for herself.

The morning of the fifth day was sunny and filled with a warm breeze.

Morgan was checking out the car Tony had given Wanda, while Wanda was trying to reject the gift. Tony shook his head placing the keys in the young woman’s hand, his eyes gleaming warmly while he also extended a mobile.

“You will find my number in there. But…” Here Tony trailed off before speaking again. “You will find Y/N’s number and location.”

Wanda opened her eyes wide, her hand trembling at this revelation. Her lower lip quivered, and she was left speechless for a moment.

“I don’t think…”

“You told me you wanted to talk to her, to mend things, didn’t you?”

“Y-yes, I did but…”

“Or, were you pretending to be interested in patching things up with Y/N?”

“No, no Tony I do but…” Here Wanda trailed off glancing at the phone with trepidation. “She hates me. She…she really despises me.”

“She does.” Tony stated shrugging. “But you don’t.”

Wanda lowered her gaze, her cheeks burning in embarrassment.

“Now, I understand many things, Wanda, and it is time for Y/N to know them as well.”

Wanda shook her head, the fear of a confrontation with you was something that haunted her sleep. There was nothing else she wanted more than to go back to you, but she knew she was late. She was always too late.

Tony closed his hands around hers, the items firmly placed in her hand.

“Talk to her. Perhaps, it won’t be what you want, but being friends could be a start.” Tony then offered a smile, nodding to the car. “Go, get settle, and when you have decided, just call and the ticket to her home would be ready for you.”

Wanda threw herself at Tony, and this gesture caught the older man by surprised. But he returned the hug, and he realized that having a family, having Morgan had changed his vision of the world. And now, he didn’t want Wanda to go around suffering needlessly.

“Don’t wait to long, Little Witch.” He whispered choosing Y/N’s nickname for her. “Go and chase happiness, you will always have a home here.”

“Thank you, Tony.”

Wanda left the place with a lighter heart, and hope in her heart. She glanced at the phone on the passenger’s seat with titillation growing in her abdomen and spreading to her chest.

Perhaps…

Wanda swallowed down and dared not to hope. First things first, she would go to the compound and after that…after that you would look for Y/N. This time around, she was ready to do everything she could to redeem herself and have a chance with Y/N; Wanda drove down the road never noticing the eyes sneaking in the reflection or the purple mist engulfing her mind.

_____________________________________________________________

Present day – Former Avenger’s Tower - New York

The place had never been this packed ever since Loki came crashing down with the Chitauri on his attempt to conquer earth. Tony served some of the drinks, his eyes going over an over to the impatient form of one Carol Danvers, the woman hadn’t stopped looking at her watch and her mobile ever since they got in there with Monica Rambeau.

Natasha grabbed two glasses, winking at Tony who merely snorted while observing the interaction. Carol turned sharply to Natasha, her lips curling lightly into a smile while she received the glass of whiskey she was being offered.

“So, how did you find earth so far?” Natasha was not one to make small talk, and Tony had a feeling he knew why exactly the Black Widow was trying to stall the other woman’s stay in the tower.

You and Wanda were finally left alone to have the long-awaited conversation you deserved to have with one another. Tony then took the other glass walking towards Strange who had dropped on the nearest sofa, with a hand covering his face.

Carol took a sip from the beverage, glancing down to her mobile then back up to a smirking Natasha. The young woman hated the fact Natasha had the knowing glint in her eyes.

“So, are you in a rush?” Carol rolled her eyes at the questions, her lips breaking into an easy smile shaking her head.

“I am.” Carol sighed glancing at Natasha with expectation. “How is she?”

Natasha held Carol’s stare for a moment before shrugging, “she is fine, right now all of us are dealing with the current crisis trying to help America and find a solution.”

Carol clenched her hand around the glass, Natasha heard the cracking sound of the glass though Carol was trying to apply all her self-restrained as to not break the glass. By now, she already knew you were not alone, and that America had gone to you for help with no other than Wanda Maximoff. Carol would be lying if she didn’t admit a part of her was highly jealous of this meeting, she knew as well as everyone else that your love for the red-head witch was something still latent in your heart.

A wave of sudden sadness and uncertainty reached Carol, and the woman jerked away when another hand placed itself on her forearm. Natasha offered the comfort of a single smile, her eyes gleaming with sympathy and understanding.

“Don’t worry, this meeting won’t take long and you will have a chance to go right to her without waiting for me or the Quinjet.” There was a teasing tone in Natasha’s voice, Carol tried to relax but her mind was full of uncertainties, and her heart was aching to see you.

“I know…and I know this is important.” Here she made a face turning her attention to Monica then to Strange. “It seems Maximoff has created a huge trouble, and as always some of us are here cleaning up her mess, right?”

Natasha pursed her lips at this declaration, “It’s not her fault, not completely.”

“I’m not so sure about that.” This time around Strange was the one to talk, he straightened up his back, all eyes of the presents were on him.

The man was looking terrible, with bags under his eyes and the clothes completely messed, it seemed as if he hadn’t sleep for weeks. He probably hadn’t. Tony sat down nodding towards Stephen, glancing at the group before emptying the glass in a single gulp.

“Okay, then, start talking Strange, we’re delaying the space princess over there, and I don’t think she has more patience for this.”

Carol rolled her eyes looking away to try and hide her red cheeks, Natasha chuckled, squeezing her forearm tenderly before joining Tony and Monica. Carol glanced at her forearm before she too joined them with the same trepidation she had been feeling from the very beginning.

“As far as we could find with Wong, Wanda and this woman…Agatha were in possession of the Darkhold.” Strange spoke waving his hands, some of this they already knew but his explanation had to start there. “As I explained to you before, this book is highly dangerous, containing spells that could granted destructive powers to whomever gets a hold of it. One of such spells is called dream walking.”

Tony pursed his lips leaning forward, his elbows resting on his knees.

“You told us this book was missing, alongside the woman Wanda was supposed to trap in the real Westview, right?”

“She didn’t do a very good job, did she?” This time around it was Carol the one to speak, the woman sat down pinning Strange with her eyes. “So, this dream walking ability, what does it do, exactly?”

Strange didn’t know how to explain the technique, he knew as soon as he started talking about it many of them would jump to the same conclusion he did. Though, his own theory still had many holes that he wasn’t sure how to fill in; he let out a heavy sigh hoping once Wong was back, he would have more answers.

“Basically, it is a technique that allows its user to use their counterpart across the multiverse. They can possess their other variants but…” Stephen scratched the back of his head, his eyes focused on every single one of the presents before they settled on Natasha. “The stronger the sorcerer or the witch, the stronger the spell, they can maintain it for a long time, and they are capable of creating the very same creatures that had been chasing America through the multiverse.”

“You are thinking about someone, aren’t you?” Carol crossed her arms shaking her head. “You think it’s Maximoff?”

Natasha shook her head, her hand waving away at this while she glared at the blond.

“Wait a second, Wanda made many mistakes in the past, but this is on a whole new level…”

“I agree with Romanoff.” Tony stated glaring at Carol. “Wanda may have made many mistakes, but this particular case we are talking about murdering to get to an innocent kid…”

“She created and slaved a whole town, I mean…” Carol said shrugging, she turned to Strange nodding. “Besides, I don’t see Strange fighting much my affirmation.”

Everyone turned to Stephen who was looking at some point on the floor, the man sighed lifting his face nodding.

“That’s my theory, actually.” Stephen lifted a hand to stop any arguments, he locked eyes with Tony trying to appear as the voice of reason. “However, I do agree with you. This Wanda, our Wanda has gone through so much…I don’t think it is her, perse.”

Monica furrowed her brows tilting her head, “what exactly do you mean with our Wanda? You mean…”

“I think it may be another version of her.” Stephen stated firmly.

Everyone jumped startled when a glass fell to the ground, Natasha opened her eyes wide turning to Stephen. She was paled, as if all of a sudden, she saw a ghost.

“Dream walking…is it possible…is it possible that they can show themselves in dreams to other people?” Natasha asked. “It is possible for them to…make physical damage through the dreams?”

Stephen opened his eyes at this, he stood up rather fast striding towards Natasha while placing his hands on the Widow’s shoulders.

“What exactly has happened, Romanoff?”

Natasha felt her world turned around, dizziness overcome her as she remember you telling her about your dreams. The hickey…the scratches… and right there and then, Natasha knew you were in trouble. Carol observed the scene and went from Natasha to Stephen and then back, she clenched her jaw understanding without any more words what was happening. She turned around and went right through the window without hearing the screams from Monica and Natasha for her to stop.

Carol would not wait. You were in danger, and she was not about to let anyone harm you. Much less Wanda Maximoff.

______________________________________________________________

The city of Ulsteinvik was filled with snow and wintery activities that include Winter festival in which the shipyard became the main attraction.

School was over for the day, and many had been invited over to the main festivities that would welcome the weekend. America was bouncing reluctantly around her classmates, her eyes drifting to where you were standing near the car with Vera and other teachers around. She put the jacket around herself, her eyes drifting around until they fell on Wanda; the young woman was strolling down the streets watching everything in awe while trying to locate America and Y/N.

“Hey, America, are you coming?” America turned around to see one of her classmates calling to her, she hesitated nodding pointing in the general direction.

“I will, give me five!”

Wanda smiled at the approaching figure of America; she observed as the teen waved her friends before making her way towards her. America was smiling, her face beaming with emotion at being part of something as mundane as a festival, but also knowing this was the chance she was looking for. The last two days, you and Wanda had been civil around one another, and little by little you had been lowering your defenses to try and get closer to Wanda.

Everything was going according to plan.

“Hey, Wands!” America wrapped her arms tightly around the redhead, Wanda offered a tiny smile fixing America’s hair while pointing to the group of teens waiting at the other end of the street.

“Aren’t you embarrassed to be showing such affection towards me?” The comment was meant to be a joke, Wand didn’t pretend to be nothing else but an acquaintance of America.

The young woman crunched up her nose shaking her head, “Never, Wands you are like…I…you are family.”

Both shifted awkwardly, the conversation dying for a moment until both of you heard your laughter. Vera was rubbing your arm, laughing at something someone else had said; America scowled at her closeness, and she could see that Wanda was not happy with it either. The young woman took that moment to call upon you, making sure everyone turned to see her and Wanda waiting.

“Y/N!! We’re here!” Wanda opened her eyes wide; she saw the glint of mischief in America’s eyes but before she could say something you had already gotten there, your lips breaking into an easy smile.

“Hey, kiddo, ready for the festival?” You passed your arm around her shoulders, America nodded grabbing Wanda’s hand and putting her closer to you.

For a brief moment, America could sense the tension around the three of you. Wanda was almost touching your arms, and you were close enough to see her clear, green eyes gleaming warmly at you. Something inside your heart shifted, and you knew glancing at those eyes was dangerous.

“I am, but I just…” America trailed off looking back at her friends. “I mean, Wanda came over and Kathe and the others are waiting…”

The breeze went pass you brushing your heated skin for a moment, you shot America a quick glance trying to gauge her real intensions but not seeing anything beyond her eagerness to be a part of the festival. Wanda was holding her breath; her whole body was hurting due to the tension she was putting on her posture.

“Go on, I take care of Wanda.” You finally replied, the words of Natasha running around your mind as you realized this could be a chance to have that conversation you have been avoiding the last couple of days.

“Good, you guys are awesome!” She hugged the both of you at the same time before walking back waving. “See you in few!”

A long uncomfortable silence filled the space left by America.

You stood there feeling a pair of eyes on the back of your neck, and you were pretty sure Wanda and Vera had their attention on you. The last couple of days had been strange, to say the least. Wanda, America, and you had been left alone with a great house and a feeling of familiarity you hadn’t felt in a long time. The last conversation you had with Natasha and Yelena had been dancing around your mind ever since they left, and the intensity of those conversations only increased whenever you were alone with Wanda.

And she had been in your mind at all times.

Even when you were dreaming.

The conversation you knew the both of you needed to have had been postponed mainly because you were a coward. And you didn’t want to fall all over again in the same pattern with Wanda, this time around you needed to let everything out and make sure Wanda understood how badly she had messed up.

“You don’t have to, you know?” Wanda broke the silence, her eyes downcast and her posture showing the defeat she had been feeling as of late. “I…I understand and you don’t…I know you don’t want to…”

Wanda shook her head, thinking herself and idiot for thinking perhaps you would want to talk to her, that perhaps this day was what they needed to start building a shaky friendship. But of course, your resentment was strong, and Wanda could not pretend to have the conversation she was dying to have with you to happen anytime soon.

The young witch was turning around ready to stroll around the city before going home when a warm hand wrapped around her wrist. She stopped death on her tracks, turning to face you and finding uncertainty in your eyes.

“Where are you going?” You furrowed your brows, uncertainty filling your mind. You were hoping to break the huge wall that was between you and Wanda, to try and lower your defense and start the process of forgiveness.

To finally hear the advice from Tony, Natasha and even Yelena.

“I…I just thought…” Wanda tried to speak but she had distracted herself with your hand holding her wrist, your eyes glancing at her intently. “I just thought I…walk around the city, you can…I know you must be busy.”

This kind of thing used to be easier.

You remembered all those times in which you would merely whisper a plan, and Wanda was dragging you around to comply with them. Now, everything was uncertain, and your mind kept on playing the treason but also the moments in which Wanda had been hurt, lost…miserable.  You took a deep breath, taking a step closer to her, you let go of her hand and made sure she was listening to you.

“I would like to talk to you, I think this is a long overdue conversation between you and me.” You mumbled shrugging. “But, I don’t want to make you do something you don’t want to…”

“I do!” Wanda blushed at the abruptness of her answer, she almost fell on her face while trying to hold her emotions.

You couldn’t help but snicker, Wanda wincing before nodding briefly.

“Yes, I think…we…we need to talk.”

“Good then, now that we’re on the same page I know a place you may like, wanna come?” You offered a single smile, that Wanda returned tentatively.

You were very conscious of the growing tension between Wanda and yourself.

It was something you had been living with in the last couple of months since the witch returned to your life. It was almost impossible not to experience it after the myriad of emotions going through your system whenever you thought of Wanda Maximoff.

Now that the both of you were finally alone by circumstances, more so than by election, and the conversation you and her never have was something quite inevitable right now.  The streets of Ulsteinvik were filled with people all making their way to the harbor and the shipyard, the conversation in a mixture of Norwegian and English made a cacophony of sounds that surrounded Wanda distracted her from her current situation, her mind had been a pool of thoughts and emotions she had been too scare to face but now that she had the possibility, she wasn’t sure how to approach.

Her eyes fell upon your figure, the confidence with which you strolled down the streets made her falter. A tingle filled with anticipation started growing on her stomach, and it spread out to her chest and limbs; Wanda was trying to organize her thoughts, to think on what to say…she thought she was prepared for this confrontation but, as you guide her inside a café and requested for something warm while sitting in front of her she realized, she was not ready.

“You mingled with the people around here quite well.” Wanda commented lightly, lowering her gaze to the table while wiggling her hands. “You have been living here for a long time, right?”

You pursed your lips nodding curtly, if Wanda was nervous about this conversation, you were ready to explode from anxiety this brought to you. Right there was Wanda, as you had always imagined her. Her long hair falling in waves around her shoulders and back, her deep green eyes gleaming with uncertainty and shyness like that very first meeting in which you bowed to love her. How many years had passed since then? How many wounds? How many treasons?

The waitress offered a kind smile while placing the cups on the table.

The warmness of the liquid brushed your mouth, and helped you distract yourself from the inevitable. Wanda played with a napkin, her gestures revealing the same nervousness you had been hiding ever since she got to your place.

“I have been living here for seven years.” You finally revealed leaning back on the chair, your eyes wandering around refusing to look at the woman sitting in front of you. “This place was refreshing for me, a new beginning.”

Wanda chewed on her lower lip, her trembling hands grabbing the porcelain cup warming up her sweaty palms.

“Can I…” She hesitated lifting her face only to see your eyes on her, you nodded curtly raising a single eyebrow at her. Wanda shivered before asking her question. “Can I know what you did before coming here?”

Wanda had never heard of you after you left the Avengers’ compound, you had disappeared and no one, not even Natasha, was able to provide any news about your whereabouts. You tensed lightly remembering those dark times in your life, the traveling through the shadows and accepting random jobs to get some money and make yourself forget the pain of your broken heart.

You rested your hands on the table, knitting your brows together you pursed your lips thinking about an answer. Your whole body ignited when her hand placed itself on yours, and her eyes were showing regret and begging for you to forgive her.

“You don’t…you don’t have to tell me, I just…” Wanda sighed squeezing your hand tenderly. “I was just curious.”

“I was in a dark place, Wanda.” The sound of the customers filling out the café made this conversation a private one, Wanda went rigid at these words.

Your eyes fell on your hands still wrapped comfortingly under hers, your heart was beating fast and a part of you wished you weren’t in love with her anymore. That your heart had healed enough for the woman sitting in front of you to not affect you the way she was doing at the moment.

“I’m sorry.” Wanda whispered, tears rolling down her cheeks, her words carrying with them the weight of your history with her.

You shrugged bitterly, taking your hand away from her while drinking your coffee.

“It doesn’t matter, I was hurt and lost and I just need a way to vent over my frustrations and my pain.”

“Y/N…” Wanda started but now that you had spoken it was impossible for you to stop.

You clenched your eyes closed, before making sure Wanda was hearing everything you had to say. Everything you had always wanted to say to her.

“I was broken, Wanda, I…travel around trying to harm myself, to make my physical pain greater than my emotional one.” You let out a snort looking out of the window. “I didn’t make it, and I grew tired…that was when I let Natasha find me.”

Wanda heard as you told her everything you had done, and a part of her felt grateful for this. It was the very first time she had accessed you, in a way she had lost after that day. You told her about your misgivings, about your findings, how you came to Norway and ended up being a double agent for Tony and Steve. You told her about your falling out with Steve when the man tried to make you find reason and confront Wanda.

“Then, a few months ago I received some tapes…” You shrugged, tired and suddenly lighter, “Westview…my anger and resentment were back and now…I can’t keep living my life hating you, Wanda. I can’t live my life with resentments and without daring to look at you. Not anymore.”

Wanda wrapped her arms around herself, she didn’t know what to say or how to react to your story. The side of the story she had always been curious about, but no one was ready to reveal to her. She heard about your lovers, and her heart broke into a million pieces knowing you had found comfort in other’s arms. She knew she didn’t deserve your forgiveness, the knowledge of you forgetting about her little by little brought pain she had been experiencing all her life.

“It was never my intention to hurt you, Y/N.” She all but whispered, you snorted shrugging once more. Your lips broke into a bitter smile while your eyes shone with unshed tears.

“We can’t help who we fall in love with, right?” You replied in a broken tone, Wanda scrunched up her nose ready to be honest with you for the very first time in a long time.

“I wasn’t in love with Vision.” Wanda noticed the shredded napkin on her hands, her heart was beating painfully hard against her ribcage while she made herself look at you.

Your back and shoulders were hurting for all the tension you were putting in them, this revelation was something you were not expecting. Your eyes finally looked with those of Wanda, and for a brief moment you saw red swirling around her green irises. The dreams that had been plaguing your for a long time coming in several images, Wanda and Scarlet mixing up just as you heard her voice.

Mine. Only mine.

As much as I have always been yours, my love.

“You have a funny way to show you are not in love with him.” You broke the spell shaking your head, frowning while clenching your fists. “You slept with him, and then you spend your time travelling with him, that and let’s not forget Westview and the happy family you had there.”

Anger was far easier than any other emotion, you clenched your jaw watching as Wanda broke in front of you. So much different than Scarlet, and yet…

“I was never in love with him. I was just…a coward. I was afraid.” She mumbled, her head pulsating painfully. Sparks of red appearing on her fingertips, and the blackness she had come to associate with her blackouts flickering in and out of her fingers as she spoke.

“You’re telling me you…you cheated on me with someone you didn’t even love?” You clenched your jaw putting money out of your pocket and leaving it on the table.

Wanda watched as you stood up and left, she hesitated, the pain inside her head almost unbearable a tug on her abdomen making her stand up and follow you.

“I…yes! Yes! I…god, Y/N, I was afraid and I was confused and I just…” Wanda followed you speaking louder, she didn’t realize she was crying until the cold winter wind touch her face. “I didn’t know…It went against everything I had been taught and my parents…my brother…I thought…”

“I was in love with you, Wanda!” You turned around screaming at the top of your lungs. “ I had the ring, and the house…I even had the names of our children…”

“I know…I found them in the compound, I just…” And Wanda felt the pulsating pain in her head mixing up with her thoughts. Scarlet tried to push the other woman away, tried to tell you that the children were yours…that she had seen it all and that she had created the world for you and her, but at some point, her counterpart, this Wanda had messed up.

The people walking down the streets all turned to look at you and Wanda, the both of you were close enough to touch one another yet it was quite evident there was a distance neither one of you knew how to close.  Wanda winced hugging herself tightly, she opened her mouth and closed, the push inside her chest breaking her resolution and her eyes gleamed red for a brief moment until you finally saw it.

One red.

One green.

Her voice, their voices…sounding like one.

“I have lost everything, Y/N. I lost my parents, and I lost myself in hatred and revenge, I gave myself to be an experiment, and then I lost Pietro.” Wanda spoke with a broken voice, she shook her head trying to tell you how she felt. “I could never tell you…you were such…god, you were such a powerful force that made me feel I could do anything, I could be anyone…but then…they started talking about the reconstruction of Sokovia, and Tony brought my parents to be buried alongside Pietro.”

You were trembling in rage and helplessness, Wanda talking about her upbringing. She talked about her mother’s teachings, the church’s teachings and what was expected of her. Wanda spoke about the fears she was not brave enough to tell you for fear of your rejection. She spoke of her papa, and how he had taught her a lesson at some point when she showed her attraction for another woman. The confusion she felt when Vision approached her with a speech about logic, biology and philosophy, about the wrongness of what she was feeling, but also about the nature behind experimenting.

“I couldn’t I just…I didn’t…” Wanda almost felt on her knees, but you were faster than her. She rested against your body, crying with tension building around her body refusing to return your embrace. And in all of this you saw them, Wanda and Scarlet, and your fears and suspicions were clarified at that moment.

They were one and the same, yet two different entities.

“I’m sorry, I never…you…I don’t know why Westview…but they are yours…just yours…” Wanda was crying now trying to get away from you. “I just messed up…I…I’m so broken I just…”

Your heart broke at the sight.

It didn’t justify her, and in all honestly the conversation had not been clear enough. But a part of you, the one that had been running in fear for what you were and who you are, understood.

“I’m sorry.” Wanda repeated over and over, and you put her tighter against yourself.

“It’s…It’s okay.” You mumbled placing a comforting kiss on her head. “It’s okay, Wanda.”

“I can’t…I couldn’t…” Wanda cried softly, and Scarlet pushed through what Wanda had to say all along. “I love you…I…never…I never stop and you…”

Scarlet stirred inside Wanda; she was so close.

It was the right time to make her move. Scarlet was finally at her breaking point, your warmness and your words, the feeling of your skin and your kisses. It was time to get rid of Wanda and for her to come forth. America was around the city and Natasha and Yelena were no longer there.

This time around, the spell would be successful, and Billy and Tommy would be back. And no one would dare to intervene.

“N-No…N-no, please, not…not again…” Wanda screamed in pain, and just as Scarlet was ready to come forth, the humming sound of a flying object approaching broke into the sky.

You tensed.

That humming was familiar, and the hairs at the back of your neck stood up at the energy surrounding such an individual.

You were so distracted you never noticed when the green eyes were lost replaced by the crimson of Scarlet. When you lowered your gaze, the woman was smiling at you, this time around she was not afraid to wrap her arms around you.

“You are mine, detka. Finally.”

“Get your hands away from her, Maximoff!” The golden blast almost made you falter, but your shadows and Scarlet’s reflex were enough to prevent the blast for harming any of you.

Carol Danvers landed with a heavy step, the blasting of energy coming out to put Wanda away from you. The shadows engulfed you separating you from Wanda, while at the same time protecting the redhead form any harms.

“You!” Scarlet growled out, her hands wriggling around with a red mist, while her fingertips started taking in a black colouring. “I won’t let you take her away from me!”

Carol advanced ready to fight the other woman, you opened your eyes wide.

Scarlet wasn’t the only one there.

The red mixed up with purple, and the sky started igniting with runes you had never seen before. The world started trembling, and the smirk Scarlet was wearing told you she was the one working on her magic.

“Carol, wait!” You approached both women, Carol hesitated turning to you with a concern frown when she noticed the blood on your forehead.

“Y/N…” She whispered turning to you, “Strange told us he thinks it is her…”

“I know.” You replied running to the blond woman, Scarlet clenched her jaw refusing to see as Carol’s hand went to your forehead cleaning up the blood in there.

“You knew?” Carol scowled turning her golden eyes to Wanda.

“You won’t have her, Y/N is mine and no one will get in the way.”

At that moment several things happened.

Carol decided to attack Scarlet without hearing your screams of warning, your powers igniting to try and prevent an ever-bigger incident when Scarlet exploded in a bubbled of red mist while the sky above your heads went purple and the runes shone with energy.

Everything around you went black and then, all of a sudden you knew no more.

______________________________________________________________

You heard the beeping of the machines breaking into your unconscious state.

Your body shivered, and this only made you aware of the deep pain you were experimenting. You opened your mouth, for a minute it took all your energy to get out the simplest of moans charged with pure pain. You tried to remember what had happened, what you did and what exactly did Scarlet and Carol did to put you in such a state.

Your eyelids were heavy, but you tried to open your eyes to see exactly where you were at.

Another moan, this one firmer. Your eyes fluttered open, and you had to blink a couple of times due to the intensity of the light.

“MOMMA!”

“MOM!”

Whatever pain you were experimenting, whatever reluctance you had in regards to opening your eyes completely were soon forgotten when you heard those voices. Two boys voices.

You sat up sharply, this time around a scream of pain left your lips, but your eyes were seeing blurry trying to focus on the two figures standing by your bed. Their little hands grabbing yours, and as you blinked away you started focusing them.

“Momma, momma you’re alive!” One of them said hugging you tightly.

You blinked trying to get away, looking around desperately until you saw her.

Wanda Maximoff standing by the door, heavy bags under her puffy eyes. The tears still fresh and she came right at you closing the space in between you and her, her lips soft and tender against yours. For a brief moment you forgot about everything, your head tilting to deepen the kiss, to get reacquainted with Wanda’s taste. The softness of her lips, the warmness of her body…god you missed kissing her.

“God, detka I though…” She whispered smiling soppily when the twins made gagging sounds at the display of affection.

Wanda smiled at you leaning in to get another kiss, but you backed away almost falling from the bed finally registering what was happening. What you had done moments ago and what the woman in front of you was trying to do.

“What the fuck did you do, Scarlet?!! Where am I?! Where is Carol?”

Wanda stood right away, her hands spreading out protectively in front of the twins. She furrowed her brows tilting her head at you.

“Y/N?” She asked tentatively, you were about to speak but a wave of nausea came right at you.

“What’s…what’s going on?” You asked just before falling unconscious on the bed.

Wanda stood there for a moment, Billy pulling at her hand while glancing at your unconscious form.

“Mom, is momma okay?”

“Yes, dear, she is just…” Wanda trailed off turning to the boys. “Momma hurt herself really bad. Go find uncle Steve and Uncle Pietro.”

Tommy and Billy hesitated but then they nodded and left.

Wanda turned to you stepping closer, her hand placing itself on your forehead, while her eyes gleamed red. She hated to do this, it was an unspoken rule for her to never enter the heads of her friends and family. But your reaction, your questions…and what had happened with Strange’s death and the disappearance of America was enough for her to do this.

“I’m sorry my love, I promise you I won’t look beyond what I need to see.” She leaned in placing a kiss on your forehead, reading inside your mind until a whimper left her mouth. She opened her eyes big, stepping back just on time for Steve and Pietro to show at the door.

“Wanda?” Steve asked tentatively, Wanda turned to him nodding.

“I found America, and she…she is not my wife.” Wanda then wrapped her arms around her boys looking back at you then at Steve. “We are in serious trouble.”

______________________________________________________________

Tag List:

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Please, tell me if I forgot anyone.

#wanda maximoff #female Reader #You #Y/N #Wanda Maximoff x Female Reader #WandaxReader #WandaxFemale!Reader #Wanda Maximoff x Female! reader #Wanda Maximoff x F!Reader #imagine wanda maximoff #MoM AU #Marvel AU

[hotchfiles]

third. damn your love.

masterlist

pairing: james x fem!reader.

content warnings: james being kind of an ass, cheating on lily, lily will be probably shit talked (i luv her i'm very sorry !), mistress!reader, uhhh cursing, not totally AU but like... canon divergent i would say. probably hurt/no comfort unless i switch the ending but--

worth mentioning: reader insert with no use of names or “y/n”. paragraphs completely in italic are flashbacks. pro quidditch player!james. muggle born!reader.

word count: 1,2k

previous chapter

chapter 3

days had passed since the last time you spoke to james, and if it was up to you, things would stay as they were. but it had never been that way. everything would always depend on james' desire. you rarely tried to communicate with him, afraid his girlfriend you catch you both. that was also why you didn't seek for him. you remained quiet, waiting for him or, on days like these, waiting and hoping he wouldn't show up.

you were still very much upset about what happened last time, but unfortunately, you were more disappointed in yourself than actually angry at james. you simply hated the power you let him have over you, hated how much you wanted to do or say something and still giving in to his whims. it was as if everything changed when he got too close, as if it were just the two of you in the vastness of the universe, no one to interfere.

even so, you were getting tired of it, just as you had grown tired of trying to discuss what you were and what future you had continuing such a relationship. you were beginning to realize that the person who might be messing things up was you; after all, you were the mistress, not lily. they were the happy couple and you were the one meddling where you shouldn't.

you shook my head quickly, trying to forget such thoughts, you were taking advantage of the solitude of the night, surrounded by photos and documents from work, you had decided about a month ago to change the way your department were dealing with its archive, but still hadn't had the time to do it, mostly because of work itself but also... because of james. you rolled your eyes at the realization that you were thinking about him again and turned back to the photos.

your department mostly archived the obliviations revolving everything around what happened and not who it happened to. it was a good way to actually find the files you might need, but when it got to the file what really matters is the people. who were the muggles, where do they live, how do they live, why were they exposed. and those details were too scattered around. some of your colleagues said you just cared too much about the muggles you wiped the memories from, which you did, but it was also a matter of organization.

before you had a chance to lie down after all the work you've been doing, you heard a frantic knocking at the door, and given it was 2am, you knew who it was. you take a long, deep breath and debate whether you should open it or not, but seeing that the lights were still on and he would notice them, you felt like you had no choice, even if that wasn't entirely true.

you mentally cursed yourself and opened the door, his hands were quick to push you against the wall, slamming the door close with his foot as his lips worked your neck.

"james..." putting both hands on his chest, you prepared yourself to push him away, trying to find the strength to get him out of there. "stop," it came out weakly, much more than you intended to, almost letting yourself be carried away by his touches. but then, a flash of awareness came back to you as you heard him groan, everything you thought about earlier and everything you wanted to say to him with it, you felt your strength return and pushed him away, looking at him showing as much seriousness and firmness as you could master, your breath still uneven.

"come on, honey, we've moved past this little game of you pretending you don't want me and denying me, come here," he said, approaching you again. you watched him come closer once more and moved aside, walking towards the kitchen. you needed to drink something if you were really intending to continue with this. sure, your first option had been to avoid him for at least a couple of weeks so you could organize your thoughts, but it was simply impossible to avoid james.

"we need to talk," you said coldly after filling one of your largest wine glasses. you heard him sigh, took a sip of the drink, and felt a knot in your stomach when you saw him sit at the small kitchen table. you were definitely not expecting that. you were absolutely sure he would deflect and try to take you to bed, as he had done the last time you said those words. seeing him willing to talk hit you hard, and you lost the words you wanted to say, resorting to the first ones that came to your mind.

"you disappeared," you shrugged.

"as if you weren't used to it," james raised an eyebrow in your direction and looked at your glass. he knew your didn't drink casually, only if you were nervous. "if you must know, i wanted to come earlier, but lily wouldn't leave my side after i turned down wimbourne's offer. so we're like, totally wasting time."

"you seemed so sure. what changed your mind?"

"just decided not to keep rubbing her the wrong way. know her well enough, don't feel like dealing with her making my life hell over a stupid transfer."

you felt an unfamiliar anger take over you. you absolutely hated the way he talked about her, as if she was the worst person to be with, such an annoying, bad girlfriend. if she was so bad, why was he with her and not with you? you drank the remaining contents of your glass in one go, sighed loudly, and looked at him, taking in every detail of him—the curls, the lips, the glasses you liked so much, the tired eyes but never without that sparkle you knew so well. watching him always calmed you down in some way, but it didn't work as you thought it would. you were too tired.

"you're a bloody bastard," you were firm but he shrugged, smiling slightly. "not a joke. you're a dickhead. and i've let myself be made a fool by you. i've let you into my house, complaining about your girlfriend, and i've let you use me for almost an year now, hoping that you would change."

you shouted what had been stuck in your throat for so long, and he got up, realizing how serious you actually were.

"you agreed to this," he said coldly, crossing his arms and biting his lower lip. "we haven't been a couple for years, and we agreed on that."

"bollocks! you came to my apartment and intoxicated me with your stupid scent, with your touches, your voice. you know i've never been able to get over you, and you take advantage of that when you're fed up with her."

you ran your hands over your face in agony, trying to control the tears that were already inevitably trying to escape your eyes. you passed by him awkwardly and went to the living room, sitting on the sofa.

"where are you trying to go with this?" he asked from the kitchen.

"where are we trying to go with this?" you replied back, looking at the floor, and silence was your only answer. "what am I to you? we spent almost four years not being friends, talking to each other once in a while and meeting at some parties because of sirius and rem. then last year, you show up at my door drunk, saying you need me. what am i to you? come on, tell me."

"you're my best friend, and apparently, you're in a bad mood, on your period or something, " he said, leaving the kitchen, and you watched him leave, frustration building up in your stomach. "i'll call you later when you're back to yourself."

"yeah, go away! you never talk when you know you're wrong anyway, bloody coward," he slammed the door behind him after he left and you got up, even angrier, grabbing one of the vases from your shelf and screaming in frustration as you threw it at the door, breaking it in tiny pieces that now covered the floor.

you looked at him with tears in your eyes and you knew surely that james could feel how hurt you were by his actions, and that was your intention, you were silent, not having said a word to him since he had arrived to your house, despite his countless attempts to talk to you and apologise, your stubbornness was lasting almost an hour now and you knew he was about to lose his temper, so you decided it was time to speak before you weren't in the right anymore.

"where were you?" your voice was low, tired, frustrated, and you had all reason for that, leaving you alone in the hospital's waiting room while your mum was freaking out all over the place seemed like a reasonable reason to be upset.

"quidditch practice, c'mon, try looking into this from my perspective." james tries to get close to you again and you move away, wiping away the tears that were stubborn enough to keep rolling down your cheeks, you cross your arms and he scoffs at your denial.

"and what's that, really? using that bloody mirror so i could tell you my father had a heart attack and i needed you, and then proceeding to continue to play? is that it?"

"what? no… i'm new to the team, i can't tarnish my name by running out of training." you roll your eyes and it's your turn to scoff, throwing your arms up in the air, not believing what you're hearing. "don't do that, listen to me, take me seriously. my grandfather's heart went through worse countless times, and he was always fine. i knew your dad would be fine."

"yes, i remember, because i was by your side during all those times." you don't even mention how different it was just by the fact your dad was a muggle, in a muggle hospital, no healing magic to help. you glanced at the clock, it was late and you were both alone, your mom forcing you to stay there and rest; you feel your eyes wet and don't bother trying to stop them from falling, "james, as a friend, you're my best friend, if you're not going to be with me when i need you, who will? will quidditch always be above me, above us?"

"please don't talk like that, honey." he runs a hand through his hair in frustration and sits down next to you, lowering his head and covering his face with his hands. "i'm sorry, you're right."

"because if it's always like this, maybe we should break up." you say at once, feeling your heart clench and holding back the sobs that join the tears.

"you're tired, go to bed, i'll make you some tea, i'll stay here in case you need me in the middle of the night." he ignored what you said completely, getting up and going into the kitchen. part of you felt relieved that he hadn't accepted the suggestion, but a large part was annoyed that he'd simply run away from confrontation, that he'd been such a coward.

it had always been quite rare for you and james to actually fight, maybe that wasn't a good thing, considering you kept everything inside until you exploded, but while you were dating it was quite pleasant, when you disagreed on something, one of you would always give in; but when you did fight, it was unbearable, james had always been cold during fights, always the type to leave before finishing the conversation, while you were the explosive and impulsive one, talking way too much without thinking, yelling more than you probably should, and then you wouldn't speak to each other for days because of the it.

from past experience, you imagined he would disappear for a while, so you sighed and switched off the lights, heading to your room, more than ever you just wanted to sleep, sleep for a few good hours and put your mind at rest, but you knew yourself too well to know that after what happened, you would definitely end up dreaming about james, but you hoped it would be something good, something that would relax you at least during your sleep.

just before falling asleep, you remembered to reply the e-mail your mother had sent you during the day, saying how much your dad and her were loving their visit to france and were thinking about staying to help your aunt with her restaurant. your heart ached when you realized it wasn't a joke, your mom saying at the very end that she knew you had your own exciting life but that they would love to have you with them there.

a chance to run away.

tag: @xcinnamonmalfoyx @dreamsygirl

#lari writes sometimes #marauders x reader #james potter x reader #james potter x y/n #james potter x you #james x reader #james x you #james x y/n #james potter imagine #james potter scenario

[sycamorelibrary754]

Guardian Angel

Chapter 3: You're Still Worthy

Summary: Emotional conversations and difficult choices were on the table for everyone the moment Wanda stepped back into the Avengers compound for the first time after Westview. But just because Wanda is starting over doesn’t mean she has to do it alone. 

Warnings: Trauma, angst, cursing.

Word Count: 3.1k

A/N: This chapter has two distinct parts. The flashback of Wanda’s first moments back in the compound (italicized) and the present day, approximately one year after Westview.

Guardian Angel Masterlist

Trust takes years to build, seconds to break, and forever to repair. Stepping foot back in the Avengers compound for the first time after Westview was freed was but the latest in a series of painful and tragic chapters in Wanda Maximoff’s story.

Fury was seated in his spacious office, a glass of Pappy Van Winkle Bourbon in his hand. He had a stern expression on his face as he intently watched Wanda's movements on the numerous security monitors placed strategically around the compound. Every twist and turn she made was being closely monitored by Fury, who remained vigilant and alert throughout.

As he sat there, lost in thought, a soft knock on his door broke his concentration. He straightened up in his chair, alert and ready to face whatever was coming. The door creaked open slowly, and a faint light spilled into the dimly lit room, revealing the outline of a figure standing in the doorway.

“Director, Ms. Maximoff is here,” Maria announced. 

“Maximoff, have a seat. Or do you prefer Scarlet Witch now?” Placing the glass down on his desk.

Maria glanced from Fury to Wanda before taking her place next to the Director's desk. Wanda sat down, trying her best to hide her nerves. The two of them sat in silence for a moment until Fury finally spoke up.

“You know, it’s crap like this that gives me trust issues,” leaning back in his chair reading the file on Westview. 

“Really? I thought it was your sparkling personality that gave you trust issues,” the redhead whispered under her breath.

“Come on, don’t give me that shit. What the hell were you thinking? Throwing the file onto his desk. “3,892 people. 3,892 people manipulated, tortured, and held hostage so you could live out some television family fantasy!” he shouted. “Do you know what I went through to keep Westview classified? What I went through with SWORD to make sure you walked out of there alive and not thrown in the Raft?” His anger growing. 

"It wasn't a fantasy!" she exclaimed, as her emotions finally surfaced.

“It was selfish!” Fury shouted. 

Maria flinched at the sound of Fury's voice before the room fell silent again.

"Director, have you ever lost someone?" Wanda asked, her gaze fixed on his desk.

“I was a Colonel in the United States Army and a CIA Operative. I’ve lost more people than you can count, including my parents. You’re most certainly not the first person to experience grief.”

Wanda had a determined look on her face as she raised her head to speak. "I cannot help but feel sorry for the ordeal those people went through," she said with a heavy accent, her voice filled with emotion. "Their suffering will continue to trouble me for the rest of my life."

Tears glistened in her eyes as she continued, "When I finally realized the agony I was inflicting, I knew I had to put an end to it. It was a difficult decision, but I have no regrets about the life I lived with my husband and children. We had our struggles, but we also had many happy moments together."

As she spoke, it was clear that Wanda had gone through a lot in her life. Despite the pain and hardship, however, she remained resolute in her determination to do what was right and to find peace in her memories.

Fury exhaled heavily and asked, 'Where are your boys?'

The redhead immediately tensed up, her heart pounding against her rib cage. 

“I need you to be completely honest with me, starting right now,” Fury said. “If you want to remain a member of this team and continue to be a productive member of society, it's important that I know everything. Please understand that no one will hurt them.”

In a moment of urgency, Wanda found herself making a quick decision. Despite her reservations, she hesitantly slipped into Fury's mind as his thoughts were too loud to ignore. She knew that this was the only way she could be certain of his intentions and confirm that he was telling the truth. When she emerged, she was certain that Fury was to be trusted. She responded with confidence, "Billy and Tommy are with Darcy Lewis."

 Fury nodded. “Where is the Darkhold?”

“I destroyed it.” 

“That’s not what the wizard thinks. Strange is sure you wouldn’t have survived the destruction of that type of dark magic.”

Wanda leaned forward in her chair and cleared her throat. "Given everything that's happened, Director, it would be unwise to bet against my abilities."

Fury finished his drink; the ice clinked at the bottom of his glass. "You are dismissed for now, but do not leave the premises," he said.

After leaving his office, Wanda rose to her feet without saying another word. Maria locked eyes with Fury before hurrying after the redhead out of the door. When they were out of earshot of the Director, Maria called out to Wanda, "Wanda, wait!" The redhead had a determined look on her face as she raised her head to speak. "I cannot help but feel sorry for the ordeal those people went through," she said with a heavy accent, her voice filled with emotion. "Their suffering will continue to trouble me for the rest of my life."

Wanda stopped moving and stood still with her back turned towards Maria.

“I’m… I’m sorry,” Agent Hill empathized. 

"Sorry doesn't undo what I did or what I've lost," she countered. "Every season of my life has led to a goodbye. My parents, Pietro, Vision. No matter what I've done to try and be better, to help others, to heal. It never ends," her voice cracked. "I don't know how the boys survived, but my heart can't take anymore.

Maria gently placed her warm hand on Wanda's shoulder, feeling the tension and pain in her friend's body. In response, Wanda turned around and fell into Maria's embrace, her facade of composure crumbling as she let out a sob. Maria held her tightly, offering a safe and comforting space for her friend to release her emotions. As Wanda continued to weep, Maria could feel her tears dampening her shirt, but she didn't mind. All that mattered was being there for her friend in need, offering support and solace during this difficult time.

*^~^*

Wanda found herself wandering aimlessly around the compound for the rest of the day. The cold and judgmental gazes of numerous SHIELD agents going about their daily routines bore into her like a hot iron, making her feel like she had committed a grave mistake. The compound was the same as she had left it, but everything felt different. The once-familiar surroundings now seemed foreign and unwelcoming.

Wanda was not ready to return to her room, as she was not emotionally prepared to remember her life before Westview. The memories of her past life seemed distant and unfamiliar to her now. She was unsure of what she would say if she ran into any of her former colleagues. The fear of their judgment and condemnation made her hesitant and unwilling to face them. Lost in her thoughts, Wanda continued to wander around the compound, hoping to find some solace or a moment of peace. But the echoes of her past mistakes and the fear of the future kept haunting her, making her feel helpless and alone.

As she walked aimlessly, lost in her thoughts, the striking redhead found herself standing outside the familiar building of the gym. The sight of it brought back a flood of memories, both good and bad, of the time spent within its walls. She hesitated before peeking through the sliding doors, making sure no one was around before stepping inside. The gym had become a sanctuary for her, a place where she could channel her inner strength and work on honing her abilities. Countless hours were spent in this space, sweating, training, and pushing herself to the limits to discipline both her body and mind. However, all that hard work, all that dedication, was shattered. The unspeakable grief and loss that followed had left her shattered, both physically and emotionally. Yet here she was, standing once again in the same space, her heart heavy with memories and emotions that she had thought she had left behind.

“No matter how many times I tried to train you to fight without using your powers, you always resisted.” 

Wanda's attention was immediately drawn to the distinct and familiar sound of a deep, slightly raspy voice that reverberated through the spacious gym. She turned her head and was captivated by the sight of Natasha Romanoff, who stood poised and confident on the other side of the room. Natasha's hair was elegantly styled in double braids, and her black workout attire clung to her fit and toned physique in all the right places, accentuating her curves and strength.

Wanda sighed, "Why fight with one hand tied behind my back?" She moved a strand of hair behind her ear.

"Because it makes you stronger," Nat replied, walking slowly towards her.

“I don’t feel very strong right now.”

“I beg to differ, otherwise you wouldn’t be here.”

Nat quietly observed Wanda's demeanor, noticing the subtle nuances of her body language. The woman standing in front of her seemed to be a mere shadow of her former self, weighed down by the immense burden of grief. It was evident that Wanda was still struggling to come to terms with all that had been lost in Sokovia, Wakanda, and most recently, in Westview. The pain and sorrow etched on her face spoke volumes of the emotional turmoil she was going through, and it was clear that she needed someone to talk to, someone who could understand her pain and help her find a way forward.

Natasha took another tack. “Get in the ring.” 

“What?” 

Natasha put down her water bottle and stepped between the ropes. "Get in the ring," she repeated.

“I’m in no condition to spar,” Wanda argued.

“Says the Scarlet Witch,” Nat smirked. “Now, come on.”

Wand let out a long, tired sigh and slowly took off her jacket. With a hint of nervousness in her movements, she cautiously stepped closer to the ring, her eyes fixed on the ground beneath her.

“No hand tied behind your back this time,” Nat said, securing her Widow Bites to her wrists.

Natasha took her fighting stance. Wanda mirrored her as wisps of red danced between her fingers. She took the first shot, summoning a wave of telekinetic force toward her opponent. With lightning-fast reflexes, Nat rolled out of harm's way, narrowly avoiding the destructive force. Sensing an opening, Natasha launched herself into an acrobatic assault. Her strikes were precise, knocking Wanda off balance. The split-second window allowed Nat to grip her arm and flip her over her shoulder. 

With a flick of her wrist from her backside, Wanda unleashed a barrage of red energy crackling with otherworldly force. The sparring became an explosive dance as Nat deftly dodged and rolled through the chaos, narrowly escaping each attack. Seizing her only opportunity, she countered with a well-timed Widow's Bite. Grunting in pain, Wanda launched her backward into the ropes with one swift motion. 

With a fierce determination, Natasha charged forward. Wanda used the last of her depleted stamina to summon a swirling vortex of red. As the intense aura surrounded her, she directed one final blast towards the Black Widow. Nat mustered every ounce of strength and somersaulted forward through the explosion, landing sprawled out on the mat. 

Wanda collapsed to the ground, her knees hitting the mat with a thud. She was gasping for air, her body wracked with sobs. Natasha lay nearby, her chest heaving and her breath coming in short, ragged bursts. The widow slowly rolled over and crawled towards her, her movements slow and labored. She reached out and wrapped her arms around the redhead’s body, pulling her close. The two women held each other tightly, neither of them speaking. Wanda's sobs echoed through the room, the sound of her pain filling the air.

*^~^*

Secretary Ross glared intensely at the team gathered around the conference table, his virtual presence towering over his desk in a show of authority. With a tone that conveyed both anger and concern, he spoke up, "I'm genuinely curious. In what universe do you think I'm going to look the other way while you jeopardize the safety of everyone in existence?" His words hung heavily in the air, leaving no room for doubt that he meant every word.

“I don’t know, Mr. Secretary. Why don’t you pick one and we’ll find out,” Natasha remarked coldly. No love was lost between herself and Ross.

Maria gently placed her hand on Nat's arm, silently signaling for her to maintain decorum.

"If you had taken my warning about Wanda Maximoff seriously eight years ago, we wouldn't be facing the dangerous threats to all universes that she has unleashed. Her actions have proven time and again that she is a clear and present danger, and it's time we take action before it's too late." Ross urged.

"We don't judge people based on their past mistakes," Natasha declared.

"Perhaps you should," he said, his gaze fixed on the Black Widow.

Yelena stood up slowly from her chair, her voice laced with a hint of malice. "Maybe it's time the world knew about your worst mistakes, Thaddeus," she threatened, her eyes flashing with anger.

“And we’re sitting,” Kate said, wrapping her arms around her girlfriend and pulling her back down.

"Excuse me, Mr. Secretary, with all due respect, we are not seeking your permission in this matter. Our intention is to inform you of our decision as a courtesy. This meeting is solely for the purpose of sharing our plans with you and ensuring that you are kept in the loop about the steps we are taking,” Steve interjected.

“Tell me Captain Rogers, what is your intended course of action when the witch inevitably betrays your moral compass yet again?” Ross asked, rising from his virtual chair.

“We never abandon one of our own, Sir,” Steve said.

“To be honest with you, Mr. Secretary, the only one here who lacks a moral compass is yourself,” Maria hissed, swiping away his hologram in frustration.

A hard silence fell across the room.

“That went well,” Clint said, as he placed his head in his hands.

“I know you don’t want to hear this, but he has a point,” Fury concurred, leaning up against the door frame.

"Are you still here? I thought you were off to sail the seven seas," Tony said sarcastically as he got up to pour himself a glass of scotch.

“Fury might be right,” Bruce interjected. Are we all forgetting how we met Wanda? Or would you like a replay of the nightmares she put in our heads?” 

“No, I’m not,” Natasha said heatedly, turning toward Bruce. “And I’m sure as hell not forgetting who destroyed the Mind Stone when it meant losing the one she loved. Or who was a split second away from defeating Thanos single-handedly, had he not blitzed the shit out of his entire army.”

“Maximoff took an entire town hostage! She manipulated the realities of 3,892 people,” Fury argued. 

“In a state of shell shock and overwhelming grief,” Maria countered. “You and I both know she would never hurt anyone intentionally or of her own accord.” 

“Are you sure about that? Do you know where the Darkhold is today?” Fury yelled. “Because I can tell you right now, Strange sure as hell doesn’t believe it’s gone.”

“I think you’ve made your point,” Bucky interrupted sternly. His Vibranium hand on Fury’s shoulder.

“Buck…,” Sam cautioned.

Thor's booming voice cut through the tense and chaotic chatter, demanding attention from all present. "Wanda is still worthy!" he declared with the power of a god. "We shall leave no stone unturned in our quest to help her regain her belief in herself." The weight of his words hung heavy in the air, a solemn reminder of the importance of lifting up those who have lost their way.

“That’s more like it,” Nat said.

“Let’s go,” Maria ordered.

*^~^*

Upon her return, Wanda made it clear that her priority was to provide a normal and safe environment for Billy and Tommy, free from the influence of her past mistakes or her sterile work environment. She was determined to create a loving and secure home for her boys. As a result of multiple meetings with Stark, Wanda decided to move out of the compound and into a home that was designed by Tony himself. And true to form, the billionaire created a spectacular home for her and her family.

The elegant craftsman-style house painted in a soft, creamy white hue exuded a warm and inviting aura, beckoning visitors to step inside. The stunning embellished concrete path, beautifully winding its way up to the charming wraparound brick porch and the wide entryway, added to the home's alluring charm. The interior was just as captivating, with each room meticulously furnished and decorated to perfection. Tommy and Billy couldn't contain their excitement as they were each given their own room to adorn and personalize to their heart's content. She encouraged the boys to let their imaginations run wild, and they eagerly reveled in the opportunity to showcase their unique interests and personalities.

A series of photographs adorn the walls, each capturing a distinct memory that the family held dear. As Wanda gazed upon them, she was immediately transported back to the bittersweet moments of their life in Westview - a life that was nothing more than a fabrication. Despite this painful truth, she remained steadfast in her desire to preserve a fragment of that existence for her sons, who knew no other place to call home. The memories, though tinged with sorrow, were a testament to the love and bond that the family shared, and Wanda was determined to keep that flame burning, no matter how difficult it was to revisit the past.

The family room is tastefully decorated with a large navy blue sectional couch, two elegant Paisley armchairs, and a beautiful Cherry coffee table that seems to beckon you to come and sit. The focal point of the room is a stunning painting by Wanda, hanging above the fireplace. The painting is a reflection of her creative soul and a way to channel her emotions and thoughts. The built-in bookshelves are a treasure trove of knowledge, holding a vast collection of books for all ages. The shelves are also adorned with a few carefully chosen plants, each in its own decorative pot, adding a touch of nature to the room. The cozy atmosphere of the family room is perfect for relaxing and spending time with loved ones.

As you step into the kitchen, a beautifully arched doorway frames the entrance, inviting you in. This is Wanda's favorite room in the house, and it's easy to see why. The spacious area is furnished with sleek granite countertops and a convenient center island, making it the perfect place for her sons to sit and share stories of their day at school. As you take a deep breath, the delightful scent of Paprikash or homemade pies fills the air, reminding every guest that Wanda's favorite way to show love is through her cooking.

Through the off-white French doors, one could step into a tranquil and inviting backyard that was meticulously cared for by Wanda. Her passion for gardening was evident in the way she had transformed the space into a lush oasis of greenery. The fragrant air was filled with the aroma of the citrus trees that she had lovingly transplanted, and the raised bed, bursting with a variety of colorful seedlings that had sprouted on the kitchen windowsill, was a testament to her dedication towards creating a verdant sanctuary for her family to relax and enjoy together.

*^~^*

"Boys, it's time for cake and presents!" Wanda shouted through the window.

"Coming, Mom!" Tommy shouted in response.

Wanda organized a cozy and warm birthday bash for Billy and Tommy, and had cordially invited the team and their families to join in on the celebration. It was the first time they were having a group gathering outside of work since Wanda's return to the team. While the adults chit-chatted and caught up with each other in the cozy family room, the youngsters were having a blast playing games in the backyard. Cooper, Lila, Morgan, and Nate were among the kids who were enjoying themselves with Billy and Tommy.

Let's go," Clint exclaimed, clapping his hands. "Bring on the cake!

“Relax, it’s not your birthday.” Yelena teased.

Steve and Bucky, with their arms full of colorful gift-wrapped presents, walked over to the elegantly set dining room table, while Wanda gracefully lit the candles on the birthday cake, which was decorated with blue and green icing. As soon as Wanda finished lighting the candles, the group of friends and family sang "Happy Birthday" in unison, and the twins, Billy and Tommy, eagerly blew out the candles.

After the birthday song ended, Billy and Tommy tore open their presents with excitement, while their mom looked on proudly. The team made sure to honor Wanda's request for no Stark-enhanced gifts. Tommy's gifts included a pair of stylish Nike sneakers, a shiny new scooter, a high-quality baseball glove, and a popular video game that he had been asking for for months. Billy, on the other hand, received a high-tech microscope that he could use to explore the world around him, a remote-controlled drone that could fly up to 100 feet in the air, and a brand new sketchbook with Prismacolor Premier colored pencils, so he could continue to develop his artistic skills.

"Okay, here's one more small gift, but let's not devour it all at once," Wanda cautioned as she placed the personalized candy bags from your shop in front of the boys.

“Candy!”

“Sweet!” 

"You can each choose a couple of pieces, and we'll save the rest for later," their mom instructed as the boys rummaged through their bags.

Tommy whirled around the table and embraced his mother. "This is the best birthday ever, thanks, Mom!"

“Yeah Mom, this was awesome!” Billy followed. 

"Mmmm, this is good," Tony said, returning from the kitchen where he had raided the bag of candy you made for Wanda.

“Excuse me, that’s not yours!” Wanda scolded.  

“I don’t see your name on it.”

“Turn it around.”

“Well,” Tony paused. Calligraphy is a lost art,” tossing her the bag.

“Yeah, that’s what I thought you said.” 

*^-^*

Maria and Natasha had decided to stay back with Wanda to help her with the post-party cleanup. As they were putting things away, they noticed red wisps of magic floating gently around the room, lifting empty plates and glasses over to the sink. Wanda had always been careful about using her powers outside of missions, but it was hard to resist the temptation to make things a little easier for herself, especially when her house was full of messy superheroes who weren't particularly good at cleaning up after themselves. As she was putting away dishes, one of them unexpectedly slipped from her grasp and hit the floor, shattering into two pieces.

"Are you okay?" Maria asked as Natasha carefully picked up the broken plate.

“I’m fine, just a bit clumsy.”

“Like mother, like sons,” Natasha teased.

“Oh yeah,” Maria said with a grin. “Nat told me all about your little adventure. She said you were smitten.”

“I was not smitten!” 

“You had a goofy grin on your face when you came back to the cafe,” Natasha said, scoffing.

“I was simply being a good Samaritan,” Wanda argued.

Natasha's lips curled into a playful smirk as she spoke, "Oh really? And who were you pretending to be when you purchased those bags of candy for the young lads from Y/N's shop?"

Wanda's eyes widened as she asked, "How did you find out? And more importantly, how do you know her name?"

“Wands, I'm a spy. If one of my friends leaves with a stranger and goes up to their apartment alone, you can bet I’m going to check them out.” 

“Well, nothing happened. I got her some ice for her ankle and left, and I didn’t even know it was her shop,” Wanda dismissed. Besides,” Wanda whispered, peering over at her boys asleep on the couch. “Billy and Tommy are just starting to feel at home here. I would never do anything to put that in jeopardy… Not again,” fidgeting quietly with the wedding ring still holding tight to her finger. It had been a year, but she still hadn’t found the strength to take it off.

“We know you wouldn’t,” Maria reassured, placing her arm around her shoulder. “But you are still worthy of the chance to be happy again, honey.”

“Just because you’re starting over doesn’t mean you have to do it alone,” Natasha added. “Is that what Vis would have wanted?” 

*Chapter 4 coming soon*

#guardian angel #wanda maximoff #wanda maximoff x reader #wanda maxmoff x y/n #black widow #natasha romanoff #maria hill #nick fury #the avengers #thor #steve rogers #captain america #yelena boleva #kate bishop #bruce banner #clint barton #bucky barnes #sam wilson #thaddeus ross #billy maximoff #tommy maximoff #marvel cinematic universe #mcu #fluff #comfort #angst with a happy ending #avengers compound

[midnight-in-town]

Finally caught up with One Piece

Because I have many many thoughts, here are some theories the latest parts of the story made me think of ! Please note that I totally need to reread a few things in order to be certain of what I’m hypothesizing about here.

Also, sorry if people already mentioned these possibilities, I really just caught up (and i need to empty my mind or i won’t be able to sleep). :))

1) The Five Elders realized the truth about Luffy’s devil fruit during Wano, because Shanks tipped them off.

Tbh it bothered me that the WG suddenly realized during the battle against Kaido that Luffy had the Nika fruit, precisely as it awakened. 

However, during the Reverie arc (which takes place at the same time as Wano), Shanks requested a meeting with the Five Elders, to speak about “a certain pirate” though the rest is currently unknown. Additionally, thanks to Jinbe fighting Who’s Who, we found out that Shanks stole that fruit from a government ship, so it’s likely that Shanks knew exactly what kind of devil fruit it was when he stole it.

As for why Shanks told the WG the truth about Luffy... maybe to stall him from getting to the One Piece? or for some other grand scheme we likely can’t figure out for now. :))

2) Seraphims were made after people who are of different races persecuted by the World Government

On Egghead, we discovered Seraphims & Pacifistas made after Kuma (whom Bonney said at the beginning of the arc was “from a different race”) and Jinbe (who’s a Fishman). Also we learnt that their “green blood” is actually Lunarian blood (gotten from King/Alber, who was experimented on at Punk Hazard and later saved by Kaido). 

This could mean that the Seraphims are made after Hancock (who was sold into slavery as a child, with her sisters, with the mark of the Celestial Dragons on their back forever showing that “they are less than humans”) and Mihawk (history completely unknown but there’s that line from Zoro “you’re a little more human than him”, when fighting against the Mihawk Seraphim) because these two are also of different races? 

3) King Im/Imu has been alive ever since the Void Century because someone who once ate the Op Op fruit during this era gave him immortality.

Very clearly, the latest chapters revealed that Im/Imu knew Nefertari D. Lili who lived during the Void Century, so they gotta be immortal at this point.

Additionally Doflamingo blackmailed the WG, because he had leverage over them, which is how he became a Warlord and Dressrosa’s king.

We never really had a confirmation as to what it was, but I’m guessing that’s because he found out about Im/Imu and also about that special property of the Op Op fruit, which is why he was seeking it with so much intensity and was so furious when Cora gave it to Law.

4) Maybe Dragon left Luffy with Garp as a baby, because Luffy’s mom is from a different race as well, so he thought Luffy would be safer with Garp, who was the hero of the navy and already hiding Roger’s son, Ace?

I know this one might seem completely random at this point, but hear me out : 

In Vegapunk’s flashback about Ohara, Dragon was said “to hate war”, was already a “freedom fighter” and was apparently not yet affiliated with either Kuma or Iva and that was before Luffy’s birth. 

It’s too early to tell since Bonney isn’t done checking Kuma’s memories, but imo Kuma probably agreed to become a pawn of the WG in order to save his kid, Bonney, from living through the same horrors he lived through as a kid. 

But before that, Kuma started the revolutionaries with Dragon soon after the Ohara genocide, so I could see a similar motivation fueling both men back then (i.e dads wanting to fight for worldwide freedom but also to protect their kid from the WG).

Also considering the newly found Cross Guild putting bounties on navy and government men (a brilliant idea btw), it’s interesting it’s made of 

Buggy who used to be a part of Roger’s crew, a man who was one of the biggest thorns in the WG’s back, 

Mihawk whose past is unknown, but who, according to Croc, is highly distrustful of others & maybe of a different race (see previous point) 

Crocodile : past unknown, but highly distrustful of others as well, wanted Pluton to fight against the WG, and mostly has a connection to Ivankov, who founded the revolutionaries with Dragon & Kuma and who knows Croc’s “secret”, implying Iva probably used their powers on Croc at some point (absolute fan of the Crocomom theory btw)

All I’m saying is that two of the Cross Guild founders might be not be estranged to the whole “previously being persecuted because of their origins by the WG”, especially considering that Crocodile is the one who sought Mihawk for this partnership in the first place (and Buggy is included for the symbolic of the threat Roger used to represent, on top of wanting to compete against Shanks for the One Piece). 

5) The last road poneglyph is held by “the man with the burn scar” aka Jaguar D. Saul.

When Wano ended, Shanks said to his crew that they were going to go after the One Piece and the next time we met them, with Kid in hot pursuit, they were on Elbaf. In other words, I think it’s fair to say that the man with the burn scar is/was on Elbaf.

Coincidentally on Egghead, we found out that Jaguar D. Saul survived being frozen by Kuzan during the Ohara genocide and worked with Elbaf Giants to salvage what he could of Ohara’s library. So I think it’s likely that at some point he found out where that last road poneglyph was and possibly acquired it. 

in that case, yay, because an encounter with Robin will prove to be both very emotional and immensely fruitful. :D 

Can’t wait to see where the story is going hehehe!! ^3^

#one piece #monkey d. luffy #monkey d. dragon #bartholomew kuma #jewelry bonney #red haired shanks #dracule mihawk #sir crocodile #jaguar d. saul #nika #op theory #my analysis #boa hancock #emporio ivankov #buggy the clown #vegapunk #trafalgar d. water law #donquixote doflamingo #world government #as of: #op1085 #egghead

[nexysworld]

Guardian Angel 🖤 Part 4.1 🖤

Read on AO3 - Requests are Open - Masterlist Read Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | 4.1 | 4.2| 4.3 A/N: Thanks for the support and patience for this chapter. Tumblr wouldn't actually let me post it in one or even 2 parts no matter how I tried to split it, so it's split into three parts (though you can read it as one chapter on AO3.)

Chapter Summary: In a an attempt to get reader to open up to him, he starts giving in to a change of scenery and other requests for her. Leon even allows her a special friend before he leaves on a work mission, leaving the reader home alone for the first time.

🖤Pairing: Yandere!Leon/Fem!Reader 

🖤Tags (not all apply to all chapters): NSFW, Masturbation, Dubcon, Sex, Gaslighting, canon typical horror and gore descriptions, probably eventual kidnapping or kidnapping like behavior, use of pet names like bunny. Leon induces some PTSD like flashbacks on purpose, general things of that nature. Unwanted creampie, etc. Probably treat as dead dove. Inappropriate use of animal collar. This chapter contains sexual content. Threats of animal abuse (though none occurs and it's not descriptive.)

As always this was inspired by @hxllfiredoll 's story Something Permanent. If you like Yandere!Leon please go give that a read along with @dollrxst's story Lovesick and @gigabyte-flare's story There's no Escape. Also wanted to add @lipglossanon because I love their work and you should too. While not explicitly yandere! it's adjacent and their works are awesome.

Weeks passed by in a haze, Leon had to guide you from task to task like a well controlled sim. “Yes Sir’s” and “Ok Daddy’s” slipped from your lips habitually, never allowing your brain to focus on anything outside of that. It was the only coping mechanism you had now, as allowing a thought to cross your brain opened yourself up to feelings you were not capable of handling now. Your mind had failed you, so you didn’t need it.

The first week you woke with terrible nightmares, screaming, crying, clawing at nothing. Leon would grab your wrists and pin you down to the mattress before pulling you into a sensory hug, wrapping your arms around yourself, not letting go until your outburst stopped. Submitting to his strength surprisingly made you feel safe, despite all that had occurred. If there was one thing you were sure of, Leon wouldn’t let anything, well, besides himself, harm you. He’d coo at you, petting your hair. “It’s okay baby bunny, I got you. I got you. Nothing bad will happen to you while I’m here.” It was at least enough to lull you back to sleep. 

During the day it was a different story. The shadow man was always there. Always . Those red eyes watching you from every corner of the home, sometimes hiding in your peripheral vision. No matter what you did, he wouldn’t go away. Every day it felt like he was getting louder, closer . A constant reminder of someone who never existed - yet whenever you heard the voice your heart would pang with fear and guilt. Your only waking comfort was Jasper, winding through your legs before disappearing. Purring by you even when you didn’t see him. 

Leon kept insisting to you no one was there. You could tell he was getting more and more upset by the day. “What’s rule number 2 Sweetheart?” “Always listen to you?” “That’s right. Do you want to go back to timeout?” “Please, no.” “Then look me in the eyes and tell me no one is there.” “There’s no one there, Sir.” “You know it really hurts me Bunny. All I do is love you and take care of you, and you’re focused more on an imaginary friend.” He said, giving you a kiss. “I’m sorry Daddy, didn’t mean to hurt your feelings. Thank you for being so good to me.” “Aww baby, you’re making my heart melt. I suppose I can forgive you.” He kissed you on the forehead and gave you a head pat. 

The last thing you wanted was to be in that basement again, alone and in the dark with your thoughts. Soon that’s when you realized if you closed off your mind, things were a little better. The paranoid fear and guilt instead turned to a resounding walled-off numbness and while the man didn’t go away, he returned to his spot in the corners making it easy for you to pretend he wasn’t there. Sadly, that meant Jasper went away too - you missed the cat’s presence. 

At first it seemed Leon was pleased that the talk of the man had stopped. However your zombie-esque behavior led to him being more overprotective, with a thinly veiled annoyance you didn’t care to think about. Not that you thought about much of anything anyway. 

Soon the entire house was baby-proofed. All the drawers and cabinets in the kitchen were locked so you couldn’t touch anything that might put you in danger. Toddler cutlery and adult sized sippy cups were all that was allotted for you still. If you’d been in the right state of mind it would've felt so embarrassing to be taken care of this way, right now though, you didn’t have enough fight left to care,living in only the most literal sense possible. 

You sat at the table, food slipping from the plastic spork for the umpteenth time before Leon would sigh and reach over, scooping up the food himself feeding it to you. “Poor baby, can’t even eat without me hmm?” 

You nodded softly while he dabbed excess food from your mouth with a napkin.

~♡🖤♡🖤♡🖤♡🖤♡🖤♡🖤♡🖤♡~ Leon hated this. For starters he was jealous, and he hated the feeling of jealousy. It burned in the pit of his stomach and twisted him at the core. The last time he felt jealous, he erased someone from this very plane of existence. But now, what was he going to do? You were so hung up on this red-eyed man that didn’t exist at all, and that damned imaginary cat. 

Couldn’t you see what you were doing to him? How unfair this was for him? You were ruining your chance at a perfect life together. All you needed to do was give him your attention, focus on him . Be a good girl - and yet here you were chasing shadows. 

There were brief times he felt guilty, he knew he’d pushed you hard in such a short amount of time. He wouldn’t lie even to himself, he had hoped to break you down further in the Bad Girl Room, but not this far and not so quickly. Leon was no psychologist but this was definitely a psychotic break if he’d ever seen one, and that was not his intention. He’d truly overestimated the capabilities inside that pretty little head of yours. He now had to work overtime to re-establish a comforting and safe environment for you. But hey, that’s what you do for the people you love.

It seemed all it took was a threat back to time out and you became so beautifully compliant. He lived for the moments he got to spend taking care of you. Slipping food past your lips while you fumbled with the too small spork, gently running a wash cloth along your body in the bath as you leaned back against him, dressing you in his oversized clothes, tucking you into your bed without a fight. 

You were gorgeous when you lazily batted those long eyelashes at him - like a human doll. Once asleep he’d lay there for hours just admiring you, taking in your familiar smell, playing with your hair, committing the feeling of skin to memory.

God it would’ve been perfect . After so much time pining after you, watching you, needing you. You were his very purpose in life after all, keeping you safe and closed off from harm was his number one goal - to an outsider it may have seemed like that’s what he had now - but that wasn’t true. He had your body. He had your compliance. But you weren’t there. Now a new type of jealousy boiled within him. He was jealous of you. Jealous that you kept all your thoughts to yourself. He wanted to hear your laughter again, feel you snuggle against him like you had when he first brought you here. What he wouldn’t give to hear you ask him about his day - actually talk to him in some capacity without being forced.  More than jealous he was insulted . Did you not think he was good enough anymore to share words with? How dare you think of yourself as above him when you couldn’t even care for yourself. No baby, no you clearly weren’t understanding your place. He had done all of this for you, you owed him your love and affection in return. He had been trying for a while with different enrichment activities to bring you out of your current state. After the first week he couldn’t take your nightmares anymore, they broke his heart, he’d started to drug your nighttime drink to help you get a more restful dreamless sleep thinking it would help. It didn’t, you slept but still woke up groggy with eye bags. It came to a head when he’d pulled you close to him on the couch for a movie night, you’d flopped over him like a ragdoll, but offered nothing else in return. He put what he knew was your favorite movie on. Dead silence . Not even a slight exhale out of your mouth during a funny part. 

Now he was frustrated. He was teetering the line between losing his temper, wanting to just shake you into compliance, make you know your place, and worrying that he would lose you completely if he did in your already broken state of mind. No - no he could fix this. You were his Bunny, a simple creature and not hard to outthink, there was just something he was missing. He’d let both his excitement and temper cloud his mind, something that rarely happened. After several hours of contemplation Leon was drawing a blank on what exactly he could do. Without a solid plan in mind he decided at the very least to change up your view a little bit - give you some outside time. Leon had implanted you with the tracker so he could keep watch of you around the entirety of the owned property. Eventually you’d be allowed to roam, but you weren’t at that level of trust yet, and given your current mental state he didn’t particularly want you outside at all - but this was his last ditch effort. “Hey pretty girl, what do you think about taking a walk with me?”

He watched you tilt your head like the question was in a foreign language. “Bunny, I asked if you would like to take a walk with me?” “Outside?” “That’s right baby, outside.” There was a slight change in your expression at the offer. Better than nothing, he’d take it. He helped you into a more appropriate outfit and shoes before guiding you out the door. He watched your timid steps as you walked around, everything so new again after the confines of the house. “Hey baby, we can go in any direction you want. Lead the way, I’ll hold your hand.” He gave your hand a gentle reassuring squeeze.

~♡🖤♡🖤♡🖤♡🖤♡🖤♡🖤♡🖤♡~ Outside felt wonderful . You’d forgotten what sunlight felt like against your skin, the warmth radiating throughout your body contrasted by the slight breeze blowing back and forth.  Leon had even let you wear a sundress instead of the usual tshirt and sweatpants of his. It swished when you walked, and for a few moments you felt normal. You felt like a person again. The only reminder of your captivity was the obnoxious collar around your neck. 

Outside had no corners, there was no man hiding anywhere, just fresh air and nature. Giddy . That was the best description you had for the moment, giddy. You walked with Leon through the back gate out into the plush grassy backyard. 

Not able to contain your excitement, you kicked your shoes off before taking off towards the middle of the yard. Leon wouldn’t be thrilled, but God, running, moving your muscles, feeling the grass between your toes. It was euphoric. You heard a displeased noise leave him as he came towards you, but you didn’t care at that moment. You removed your hair tie so the wind could properly blow it around, before closing your eyes and twirling in a circle giggling. God were you actually giggling? Yes you were . That’s how amazing it felt to be outside right now. 

Leon stopped just a short distance from you, when you opened your eyes to look at him, shock was written on his face which melted to a smile once he’d seen your laughter. You stopped to take in his form. The rays of light poked through the trees making his honey-blonde hair look even shinier than usual, his blue eyes looked beautiful against the contrasted green of the trees behind him. He looked so normal. For a brief fleeting moment you just saw Leon, your neighbor who’d been so kind to you before. You had to take a moment to remind yourself of who he really was. Maybe he can still be that Leon too though?

The idea was cut short as your head whipped to the side, hearing a noise in the distance. For a second you almost panicked thinking it was another hallucination, you didn’t want it to be, nothing would've ruined the outside experience more for you. And then there it was again, so soft and small. “Do you hear that?”

“Hear what Bunny?” “Over there.” You pointed to the trees at the edge of the yard, grabbing his hand you gently tugged coaxing him to walk with you, but he stood like a statue. “No baby, not until you put your shoes back on.” “Please? The grass feels so good and I think it might go away if we don’t hurry.” Again he didn’t budge. “A little time outside and you’re already forgetting the rules? Maybe we should go back inside then.” His features cinched together into that hard authoritarian look. “No. No! I’m sorry. Look, I'm putting them on right now.” You slid your feet back into the slide sandals. “See?” You reached out for his hand again, this time he took yours and let you walk closer to where you wanted to investigate. Your eyes lit up when your suspicions were confirmed. Sitting underneath the tree was a small cat, all black, not Jasper - which meant it was likely real. It was older than a kitten but still too small to be an adult. You went to reach out a hand to coax it towards you but Leon pulled you back. “I don’t think so, Sweetheart. That thing could be feral, you have no idea it might be carrying. You can look, but stay back here with me.” Despite your disappointment in not being able to move forward, you were comforted to know the feline was in fact real. You observed the cat a little longer, it stretched from its spot and limped towards you, something was wrong with its back leg. It seemed so sweet letting out a soft mew, the closer it got you could see it was in bad condition, too thin. You felt an odd sense of heartbreak and when Leon went to pull you away you squeezed his hand softly. He could already see the cogs in your brain turning. “Bunny, no.” “Please? It’s not feral, it’s just hurt, it needs help.” The cat was sniffing at your feet now, purring despite its injuries. Leon didn’t seem swayed by your pleading or the state of the creature. “If I had a real one then you wouldn’t have to listen to me talk about an imaginary one. Please, you can’t make me leave him out here. I’m begging you.” Leon let go of your hand and you took the opportunity to bend down and pet the cat’s head. His fur was so soft, you couldn’t help the ear to ear smile that spread across your face when it rubbed into your touches. The cat moved over and nudged against Leon’s boot. “How can you say no to that little face?” You pouted, doing your best to give your saddest face, batting your eyelashes. “Bunny, don't look at me like that…” He sighed looking down at the creature. “Fine. Fine. But you’re not naming it until I take it to a vet to make sure it’s not diseased.” His words went through one ear and out the other, you couldn’t take the excitement as you flounced over and wrapped your arms around him, pressing a kiss to his cheek. “Thank you Daddy, thank you so much.” 

~♡🖤♡🖤♡🖤♡🖤♡🖤♡🖤♡🖤♡~ 

Leon did not want the cat. He didn’t care if it had a clean bill of health or not. One more responsibility to take care of, one more thing to pull your attention from him…but then he saw that look on your face. God you were really pulling out all the stops to tug at his heart, not to mention the way you looked twirling around the yard. He can’t remember the last time he’d seen you that happy, prior to even bringing you here, it had been so special he hadn’t even stopped you from removing your shoes or running off. So of course he gave in to his little Bunny. He’d allow the cat, if only for your happiness, but then you had embraced him as thanks? Kissed him too? His heart nearly imploded by the willing show of affection. It was such a stark contrast to the lifeless husk you’d been.  He internally patted himself on the back for his decision to bring you outside today. 

He watched you scoop the little feline up in the skirt of your dress, so careful to not hurt it further, cooing and doting on it. Then it occurred to him . Yes baby, that’s exactly what you needed. Something to take care of, to be needed by . Why hadn’t he thought of that sooner?

This cat wouldn’t do though. No it was too broken, too needy, might take you too far away from him. But a cat would be perfect. That night he gave you an extra dose of your sleeping medication to make sure you’d be out for a long while, he left in the early morning hours after he packed the cat up in his Jeep, heading for town. 

~♡🖤♡🖤♡🖤♡🖤♡🖤♡🖤♡🖤♡~ 

You woke sluggishly in the middle of the afternoon. It was the first time in a long time that you can remember waking up without Leon already being there to greet you – and there was a small part of you that nearly panicked. The house was silent, too silent . After the excitement of the previous day you were feeling a little better, which meant you hadn’t closed your mind off. He was back again, red eyes glowering at you through the crack in the closet door. You swallowed thickly, wishing you hadn’t noticed. Your hands shook, knuckles white as you gripped the bedding. You remembered what Leon had said, nothing would happen to you as long as he was there , but he wasn’t there, and he didn’t even believe this thing existed. You gathered up all your courage before dropping your feet to the floor, running out of the room as fast as you could like a child running for their parents after a bad dream. 

As you trotted down the staircase, you heard the sound of the Jeep’s ignition being turned off. Practically plastering your face to the window, you watched as Leon pulled a pet carrier out of the side and your heart leapt. He’s here. You’re safe. He meant what he said about keeping the cat. Leon brought the carrier inside before exiting and returning with a few boxes of cat supplies.  “Hey baby, you just wake up?” “Yeah. You weren’t here.” You didn’t know why you felt the need to point that out to him. “Ah, sorry for not warning you. I took the cat to the vet as promised Sweetheart. Lucky for you they patched him up and gave him a clean bill of health, just a little scrawny. Here, let me get that for you so you don’t hurt yourself.” He said opening the carrier’s locks. The little black cat nervously peeked out and you gently stroked the fur on its head with two fingers. “Jesus what the hell is that?” You asked, looking at the giant robot thing Leon was putting together in the living room. Leon gave you a knowingly disappointed look. “Bunny, what’s rule number 3?” You had to actually think about it for a moment before replying, not being on auto-pilot after so many weeks was difficult. “Good girls don’t have potty mouths?” “That’s right.” “Sorry Sir. I meant to say, can you please tell me what that is?” “Litter-robot. Don’t want you having to put too much effort into scooping nor do I want the house smelling like a cat.” “Oh. High tech, I like it, thank you.” You looked down at the cat that crawled into your lap. Now that you were looking more closely, something was off. This cat was all black, but it definitely wasn’t the one from yesterday. Tiny details were off. Besides, the other one’s leg was hurt pretty badly, this one looked totally ok. Leon caught the look on your face. “What’s wrong?” “This isn’t… what did you do with the other cat?” “What other cat?” “The one from the yard. This isn’t it.” “Of course it is Sweetie.” “But what about the leg? This one looks completely fine when the other–” “They stitched him up, small stitches you can’t see because of the fur, it’s fine.” “But I remember he distinctly had 12 whiskers, this one has 10.” The second the words left your mouth you knew you should’ve just let it go. “Bunny, are you accusing me of something?” “No, I’m sorry – “ The shift in his mood was scary. “It’s pretty fucking ungrateful don’t you think? Weeks. For weeks I put up with your nonsense about glowing eyes and invisible cats. I even put up with your lack of affection. Despite that, I let you outside, I let you have the first pet you see, even drive it to a vet. I spend all this money on the stupid thing too and you accuse me of something? Daddy’s beyond hurt and mad .” You shivered at the look on his face, he fished the remote out of his pocket and you instantly grasped at the collar on your neck in fear. “No, no I’m sorry. I’m sorry.“ “I give an inch, you take a mile.” “Please, I was wrong. I’m wrong. It’s the same cat. I must have just been overly excited yesterday. Please. I’ll be good, I’m sorry.” Desperately you moved the cat off your lap and scrambled over towards him, gently putting your hand on his, lowering it along with the remote, before leaning forward and kissing him on the lips with a few quick pecks. “Really, I’m so happy about the cat. I’m sorry, please.” His anger seemed to soften with that, he brought one hand up to tighten in your hair, pulling you in for another kiss, this one deep, slow. He held you there an extra moment, resting his forehead on yours, eyes closed, taking in the situation. “Bunny, I think that taste of freedom has you acting a little out of whack. Don’t make me regret loosening the leash a little. One more, and I mean one more slip up and I’m either going to shock the piss out of you or put you back in timeout, got it?” “I understand. I’m so sorry Daddy. Really.” 

He kissed you on the cheek, letting you go so he could return to setting up the remainder of the cat items. Your heart slowly resumed its normal beat as you pulled the cat back onto your lap, stroking its fur to calm yourself down. The dull purr that it gave did put you at ease slightly. You decided to try and change the subject to something happier, something to ward off potential tears. “I thought of a name.” “Oh yeah, and what’s that?” “Lucipurr. Lucip for short.”

Leon let out a small laugh. “And here I thought I was the king of corny jokes.” Hearing him laugh felt good, rewarding to your spirit. It stirred memories of prior to all this , just like seeing him so sweetly in the sunshine. 

Maybe he hadn’t replaced the cat. Maybe you were just remembering wrong. Even if he had, was it really so bad? You still had Lucip on your lap purring up a storm, Leon skillfully putting the litter box and cat tree together. Everything felt so normal for once. Even the red eyed man was left upstairs in the closet, away from you. Out of sight, out of mind. Or more like the other way around in this case. There was nothing with you except Lucipurr, Leon, and the sunlight coming in through the windows. 

~♡🖤♡🖤♡🖤♡🖤♡🖤♡🖤♡🖤♡~ 

Despite the small tiff that started, he was beyond happy to see you coming out of your shell. God you were so beautiful when you smiled, and your lips felt like heaven crashing down on him. He knew he’d have to get a hold on himself so as not to let you off too easily in the future, you still had a lot to learn and get used to. Rules and discipline were important, but every now and then letting you off the hook a little wasn’t too bad. He was honestly just cheesed to see you smile again. Yeah he did replace the cat. The other was given to a vet to adopt out, he wasn’t a monster or one of those sick serial killers who torture fluffy pets for fun. What he hadn’t expected was you to notice so easily, he’d done his best to find an exact match. It didn’t matter now though, you seemed content with the one in your lap. Honestly, he’d snapped more out of annoyance of your perception than anything. You were so strange to him, he was always either over or under expecting from you. A unique creature for him to tame, but tame he would, and he felt so close to doing so. After all, an untamed animal was an unsafe animal. Over the course of several more weeks he kept a closer watch on you. No more talk of hallucinations. Excellent . You had actually asked him to watch a movie with you, three different times. Even better . Though he could have gone without you petting the cat the whole time, you were snuggled against him willingly. Everyday he’d take you on a walk just after breakfast and another small walk before bed too, earning him appreciative kisses.  

And tonight? Tonight he finally wanted to test this newly affectionate you. He craved you and wanted to see if you were really and truly opening up to him like he hoped. Sure he’d had you plenty of times while you slept, but it wasn’t the same. He shooed the cat out of the bedroom before closing the door. “Why’d you do that? Lucip sleeps in here–” “Because baby, I think you owe me.” He watched the puzzled look form on your beautiful features. “I’ve been so kind haven’t I? The cat, the outside trips. Not to mention the weeks I spent snuggling your panic attacks away every night.” There was always this small amount of panic that would cross your face when he interacted with or spoke about the cat. He committed it to memory knowing he held control over that. “You’re not going to get rid of him are you?” “Oh baby girl, not if you don’t give me a reason too. Are you going to give me a reason too?” When you shook your head, he walked towards the bed, pulling his shirt over his head while he did so. “Look what you do to me.” He cooed, rubbing the bulge that was already forming in his sweatpants. “Why so nervous Bunny, did I hurt you the last time?” “No, Sir. But –” “But what?” He raised a brow at your reaction, daring you to be careful with what came out next. “Last time you promised the morning after pill but then didn’t –” “Did I? Are you sure? I don’t remember that.” He brought his hand up to your face, rubbing your cheek. “You don’t wanna have Daddy’s baby, is that it?”

He watched your face closely testing your reaction. Your eyes darted around nervously while you fidgeted with the sleeves of the sweater you were wearing, he knew you were looking to find the answer that would appease him. Cute . “Don’t worry Bunny, we have plenty of time in the future for me to breed that little pussy. I’d rather enjoy us time for a while, unless you want me to fuck a baby into you - then I’d happily oblige.” He noticed your thighs squeezed together at his words despite your nerves, he slid his hand up one of your legs and leaned forward to lap at the shell of your ear. “C’mon baby, I’m just teasing. I’ve been tracking your cycle, you’re not going to get pregnant tonight, relax.” He kissed along your neck bringing your hand down and coaxed you to touch him through his pants. He sucked a particularly deep bruise into your neck before soothing the purpled spot by circling his tongue over it. “I’d be more comfortable with birth control or –” Your sputtered attempt at asking was adorable . “No Bunny, chemicals like that aren’t good for you. Trust me.” He continued working his way down your neck, letting out a small hiss with each rough touch of your palm against his clothed erection. “What’s rule 2 baby?” “Always listen to you, Daddy.” “Fuck, that’s right.” He bucked into your touch when your fingers wrapped around the outline of him instead of just the flat of your hand. Leon removed your hand from himself so he could more easily get your shirt off. A  man on a mission, he sucked deep purple marks into your skin, trailing them down from your neck to your clavicle, holding you in place while the map of marks continued over your stomach. He stopped only at your hip to give it a nip, causing you to jolt.

“So pretty. Purple is definitely your color princess.” He dipped two fingers between your folds, swiping your slick upwards and over your clit, relishing in the noise you made. “Look at that, seems your pussy agrees, she’s so happy she’s crying tears of joy.” He took a moment to eye you up and down, he brought the hand he wasn’t using to play with you up to your neck, tapping the collar lightly. “Hmmm. I think you’d be more comfortable with it off, yeah? I’ll tell you what. I’ll take it off, and if you’re a good girl for me, and I mean a really good girl for me, I’ll give you an even better one. Sound like a deal?” Leon reached into the pocket of his sweats and pulled out a little key, making quick work of the lock and releasing your neck from its confines. He gently rubbed the red marks it’d left on your skin before leaning down to capture your lips again, nibbling and sucking on your bottom lip before pulling away, leading you to sit up and follow him to the end of the bed. Tugging his pants down, he kicked them off to the side before giving his now freed cock a few good pumps. A bead of precum began to pearl at the tip before running down the shaft smearing with the movement of his fists. “Now, I’m going to trust you to be a really good girl. No biting alright?” He pressed the tip against your plus lips, rubbing it back and forth slightly until they were coated in his precum, before he pressed against them urging you to open. He moaned as you accepted him into your mouth. “Fuck, Bunny, just like that.” He held your hair and pushed himself until he was at the back of your throat and held you there. Your tongue hung out, spit spilling down the sides of your face, eyes watering. You looked gorgeous. Right when you were on the cusp of lifting your hands to signal it was too much he pulled out, letting you gasp for air. “Sorry baby, maybe that was a little too much to start. Here, why don’t you play with it for a little however you’re comfortable – I can train your throat another time.” He gave you a moment to catch your breath before encouraging more action.  

He hissed when you leaned forward to place a kiss on the tip before lapping at it, he was about to lecture you for teasing, when you swallowed him back into your mouth and began to bob your head shallowly, using your hand to grab what wasn’t fitting. “Good girl. You look so pretty with my cock in your mouth.” Every now and then he couldn’t stop himself from bucking forwards, throwing you off your pace and gagging slightly. When he was close, he grabbed at your hair and tugged you off with a resounding pop, moving positions so he was propped up at the headboard, urging you to crawl back over to him. “Come ride me baby.” He helped you position yourself on top of him, guiding you down onto his thick length until he was bottomed out in your leaky cunt. “So good . I’ll never get used to how your needy pussy just swallows me up.” Leaning back, he put both hands behind his head to relax, allowing you to grip onto his shoulders as you bounced up and down causing obscene squelching noises. “That’s right baby you make Daddy feel so good. Show me how grateful you are for how daddy takes care of you.” Your tongue hung out of your mouth as you concentrated on your movements, the sweet whimpers you made as you slid along his shaft sounded throughout the room like his own personal symphony. “That’s it, god you ride me so well.” He let you go at your own pace, once he noticed you were tiring out opting to rock your hips vs bouncing he decided to help. “Here baby, let me do the rest.” He reached up and grabbed both hips with his strong hands. “Use one hand to hold yourself up. Yep just like that. Now take that hand and touch yourself f’me. Can you do that, baby?” Once you were situated how he wanted you, he easily lifted you up by your hips and brought you back down. His years of strength training made it easy for him to slide you up and down his cock like a personal fleshlight.  For the first time he heard you squeak out words, almost incomprehensible with the way your head was thrown back while you lazily rubbed at your clit. “Daddy, I’m so close –” “Atta girl, go ahead baby..” He picked up his speed bringing his hips to slam up each time he pulled you down, groaning when your orgasm soaked everything beneath you as the muscles of your cunt milked the cum out of him. He groaned and spilled into you, slowing down as he rode his orgasm out. 

#leon kennedy x reader #leon kennedy x you #leon kennedy x y/n #leon s kennedy x reader #leon s kennedy x you #leon s kennedy x y/n #yandere! leon kennedy #yandere!leon kennedy #yandere leon kennedy #resident evil #resident evil 4 #resident evil 4 remake #re4r #re4r leon #fanfiction #resident evil fanfiction #reader insert #fem!reader #female reader #Guardian Angel Fic #Nexys #Leon Kennedy #Leon S Kennedy

[riptideripley]

Chapter two of: Addicted.

word count: 1,836

Roman sat up out of his bed with a groan, waking up to his 7:30 alarm. He sat up and was instantly sore, giving him a fresh reminder of last night. He sighed and grabbed his phone off the charger, eyes widening when he saw 3 missed calls from Rhea. He instantly called her back as he flipped the covers off his legs and stood up to stretch.

"Hey Rips, what's up?"

"Did seth tell you"

"Tell me..what?"

"Well he set up a breakfast "date" for us to go to so we can talk. It's at 8:30 so hurry up."

She spat out and hung up quickly leaving Roman stunned. He put his phone back on the charger and grabbed his essentials out of his suitcase, heading to the bathroom.

Rheas POV

I hung up almost instantly after talking to Roman. Why the fuck would Seth set this shit up knowing I'm still pissed?! I glanced over at Dom who was peacefully sleeping, god he looked beautiful. I gently shook him, "Hey Dom..I have to go soon alright?" I spoke softly not wanting to really disturb him.

"Yeah..? Alright mami be safe" he mumbled tiredly back to me, kissing my hand before turning to the other side to get comfortable. I smiled and got out of bed, walking to the bathroom to check myself out. I've already went to the gym, showered, and did everything a woman needed to do. I checked the time and saw it was already 8:10 so I grabbed my mini bag and headed out the door, giving Dom a kiss on the cheek before leaving.

15 Minutes Later.

I arrived and I'm instantly irritated. I see Roman and Seth sitting at a small squared table off to the corner, walking over there. "Rhea! Glad you could make it." Seth said with a smile in which I returned one as I sat down. Looking at Roman just made me sick.

No ones POV

All Roman could do was look at her. I mean he felt guilty and tried everything to apologize, but he knew it would take some time.

"Rhea look, I know I've already explained everything to you. I'm really sorry alright? I never meant for him to find those messages and find out everything."

Rhea sighed, stirring the coffee stick around in her black coffee Seth ordered for her. "Yeah..I guess I accept your apology. I just don't want Jimmy around me ever. again."

"Alright I can promise that no worries" he responded with a smile, finally all of this would be put to rest.

"Soo..how's you and Dom?" Seth questioned, taking a sip of his coffee. "Things are..meh. Same old same old I guess" Rhea responded with a slight smile, not wanting to go into detail about the truth.

Truth be told, after Dominik found out about Rhea sleeping with Roman things went sideways for a while. He wouldn't book hotel rooms with her, he wouldn't even sit next to her in the car rides with the group. It took him a few weeks to finally talk to her and at least..attempt to move on from it. Things went well for a while and then they didn't. It took them a while to get back on track and just let things smoothe over on its own.

Roman looked around taking in the scenery when he spotted someone. Dean. He damn near jumped up out of his seat to go run and hug him but remained composed. "Rhea you know you can always talk to us right?" "Yeah..Yeah I know" she spoke which snapped Roman out of his zone. He was too busy looking around and staring at Dean to realize the conversation they were having. They were going on and on about the whole situation from Elimination Chamber and how her relationship was with Dom. He felt bad truly but god it was just unfair Dom got to have her and not share.

Rhea checked her phone and stood up almost instantly. "Hey I um- I gotta go. Something happened with Damian and Finn" she spoke quickly, grabbing her coffee cup and leaving.

Seth noticed Roman staring at someone and looked, it was Dean.

Flashback.

"Dean this isn't fair and you know it."

"Oh cmon Seth. You know he'll never love you the way he loves me just fucking face it dude."

Roman just sat there completely silent and out of it. He was in love with his two best friends and didn't know what the fuck to do. Seth walking in on him and Dean didn't make things any better for him either.

"One day Seth you'll realize. Nothing and no one can replace me in his life."

End of flashback.

Seth's blood boiled and his heart sank. Dean was the one person he didn't want to see ever again after those words Dean spoke to him. Roman seemed to notice this and sat there quietly, his gaze shifting off to look outside the window.

"Go talk to him, I know you want to."

"Seth I-" "Go."

Roman silently stood up and made his way over to the table were Dean was sitting alone. "Holy shit- Ro?" Dean spoke damn near choking on his drink. Roman chuckled and smiled. "Hey Dede..haven't seen you in a while you know. Ever since you went to AEW you kinda ghosted me" he spoke and took a seat in the chair across from Dean.

"Shit dude sorry about that. Works have been busy and you know how shit is" Dean spoke feeling guilty about just leaving Roman alone how he did. "It's fine I get it, how'd you like it over there?" Roman questioned.

"Awe man you've got to come watch one of my matches if you aren't busy- I'm having a blast" he spoke, seeming very enthusiastic about it which made Roman chuckle to himself. "I'll try, hey did you uh get a new number or something" he asked as he pulled out his phone from his pocket. "Shit- I did, here give me your phone"

Seth just sat there. Watching as Dean typed his new number into Roman's phone. This whole interaction just made him more and more pissed off, so he stood up and walked out of the building. Roman noticed and just sighed in his head, continuing his conversation with Dean.

When Seth got back to the hotel, he was not expecting the scene he saw in the lobby.

"Damian what the absolute FUCK is wrong with you huh?! You go out with Dom for one fucking night and come back with a pregnancy?!" Rhea was fussing at Damian at the top of her lungs. From what Seth gathered within the 5 seconds of him being there, Damian and Dominik went out to a club and Damian got someone pregnant. Thank god this was a WWE only reserved hotel or shit would've hit the fan quickly.

Finn was pacing around furious while Dom just stood there silently. He knew who the girl was sadly and if he told Rhea it would just make her more mad. He noticed Seth out of the corner of his eye and sighed as he quietly walked over to him.

"Is everything..good?" "Fucks no. I mean you hear what she's saying" Dom responded very quickly as he sat down in a lounge chair with Seth.

"So he got someone pregnant huh?" Seth asked as he sipped on the coffee he got to go. "Yeah..I mean I told him it was a bad idea to go home with the girl but he didn't listen to me. And I mean you know the whole thing between him and Finn right?" Seth shook his head no.

"Shit dude you've got to keep up with the locker room whispers. Apparently they're in some sort of relationship without a label on it, it's confusing shit and I just gave up on trying to keep up with it."

"So that's why he's so mad.." "Yup."

At this point Roman had returned and Rhea's former tag partner Liv showed up from all the commotion. "Rhea! Calm the fuck down ok?" Liv spoke as she held onto Rhea's arm to pull her back from slapping the taste out of Damian. Rhea snatched her arm out of her grip and walked off to go calm herself down. Dominik took this opportunity to stand up and go after her to make sure she didn't break anything like she tends to do. Damian stood there pissed after being yelled at like a fucking 2 year old but to be honest he deserved it.

Hours later. 7:30 pm.

It was a saturday so everyone tended to head out to a club or something to relax and have fun. Rhea invited Roman,Seth,Liv,Dom, and Bianca out to a bar for the night to cool off. When Roman arrived, he spotted Rhea alone and went to go talk to her. "Hey you alright? Where's everyone else?" "Oh hey..well the girls and seth are over there bothering some people. Dominik decided not to show up and instead went to Damian's room" he nodded at her words and ordered him a double whiskey.

"See you ordering the same thing as me hm" Rhea spoke and chuckled to herself, sipping on her glass of whiskey. Roman smiled and took a sip of his drink when he received it, looking off in the distance at Seth.

"You two still messing around?" Rhea asked, trailing her foot up his leg. She knew she was wrong for doing this but she couldn't help herself when he looked that good in his all black tight fitted shirt and sweatpants. Roman noticed this instantly and chuckled to himself, running his hand up her leg. "Yeah..we are. Is that an issue Miss Ripley?"

"Oh not at all..I can change that tho" she spoke with a smile and finished off her drink, Roman doing the same.

Fast Forward to the next morning.

Rhea sat up and looked next to her, instantly jumping out of the bed. How the fuck did she get in bed with Roman of all people? She quickly dressed herself and was about to leave but was stopped at the feeling of a hand on her waist. "Leaving now Rhea?" a familiar voice of Roman's in her ear.

"Yes Roman..Dom is probably worried sick about me alright?" she spoke and shoved his hand off of her. "Fine, go ahead and leave. We'll talk about this at some point" he spoke and watched her leave, loving every second of the view. He turned over in his bed and grabbed his phone, calling Dean to plan to meet up.

Rheas POV

I banged on the door, trying everything to wake at least Dom up. Finally he opened the door and looked at me, not seeming too happy to see my face.

"So..Roman again huh?" shit.

#wwe #rhea ripley #dominik mysterio #judgement day #rhea ripley smut #damien priest #wrestling #finn balor #roman reigns #seth rollins #dean ambrose #wwe angst

[catharsis-in-darkness]

Family Affairs: Chapter One

Authors Note: This definitely took longer than expected, so i’m sorry for the wait!

Pairing: Vinny Mauro x Reader

CW: Fluff, Mentions of children, Implied smut

Word count: 1,053

Tags: @tearfallpixie @jilliemiw86 @vinyardmauro

Let me know if you’d like to be tagged!

It was a lazy Sunday afternoon for me and Vin. He was streaming and playing WoW, while I was sitting on the couch next to him reading a book. He would occasionally look over at me, making sure I was okay as he had been streaming for nearly 4 hours. I would always give him a nod back before continuing on with my book. Eventually I drifted off to sleep, waking up to Vin picking me up off the couch.

“C’mon Princess, let’s get you to bed.” He carried me bridal style into our bedroom and set me softly on our bed. I reached my arms out towards him, attempting to get him to join me. I grumbled when my hands were met with air.

“Let me change first, love.” I threw my head back with a groan, finally prying my eyes open to look at him. We made eye contact as he was pulling his shirt off. I wiggled my eyebrows at him. He laughed softly at my antics before laying down next to me. Lifting his arm so I could lay on his chest.

“I love you Y/N.” He murmured into my hair. I softly kissed his chest. “I love you more Vincenzo.” I whispered into his skin.

Vinny and I met at a gaming convention 3 years ago. It was the best thing to ever happen to me.

*flashback*

“Oh my god! Y/N we have to go over to the WoW tent!!” My best friend Logan, grabbed my hand pulling me along. I wasn’t paying attention to where we were going. Logan loved video games, I on the other sucked at them. I only played for fun, on occasion.

“Oh shit!” Was all I heard before my body crashed into another, causing my coffee to spill all over me. I let out a gasp looking down at my now soaked clothes.

“I am so so sorry! Let me help you.” A rushed voice met my ears as I looked up to see a head of messy curls scrambling to grab napkins from a nearby table. He grabbed as many as he could from the dispenser making his way back to me. The unknown man started wiping at my jeans hurriedly.

“Don’t even worry about it, they’re old jeans anyways. It’s probably time I get rid of them.” I tried to lighten the mood, but the panic was set on his face. I softly grabbed his hands, attempting to grab a napkin from him. “Fuck dude, I’m so sorry. I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going.” He apologized yet again.

“I promise it’s okay.” I smiled at him. He finally looked me in the eye. The realization of how attractive this man was hit me. He had a curly bob, with red money pieces. He looked flustered, a light blush covering his cheeks.

“Let me make it up to you, please.” My brow raised at that. He obviously feels bad and it was an accident.

“No, it’s okay I promise you uh…” I dragged on.

“Vinny, my name is Vinny.” He finished for me.

He ended up buying me a new coffee, and ever since then we’ve been inseparable.

*present*

“You know I always think of what would’ve happened if you never ran into me that day.” I gasped, lightly smacking his chest. “You ran into me!” The accusation leaving my mouth hurriedly. He grabbed my hand that smacked him and intertwined our fingers.

“I know mama, I’m just messing with you.” He chuckled, his thumbs soothing running over my knuckles.

“Go to bed, idiot.”

“As long as I’m YOUR idiot.”

I woke up before Vin and got up to make us breakfast. I giggled at his groans of protest before slipping on the shirt he discarded of his body last night. Today the boys were leaving for a 3 month long tour. To say I was sad, was an understatement.

Getting used to Vinny being gone for long periods of time has been a struggle. Even after 3 years, my heart still pangs at the thought of him leaving. I was pulled from my thoughts as warm arms wrapped around my waist.

“Good morning, Princess.” Vin murmured into my skin, as he placed kisses along my shoulder. “Good morning, Love. Did you sleep okay?” I basked in the warmth of his body as I whisked some eggs in a bowl.

“I slept like a baby, I always do when you’re next to me.” I rolled my eyes at the corny comment before I turned to face him. Nervousness started bubbling in my stomach as I looked into his eyes.

“So uh- When are we gonna make some?” I questioned shyly.

“When are we gonna make what?” He asked, moving around me to start cooking the scrambled eggs. He grabbed a pack of sausage out of the fridge and threw them in a pan, all while I watched him silently. He noticed my silence quickly turning to look at me.

“Babies. When are we gonna make some mini Vincenzo’s and Y/N’s?” His head tilted at my question, almost looking like a confused puppy. His brows furrowed and a look of surprise washed over his facial features.

“You- You want to have kids??” His tone was uneven. Fuck this was a mistake wasn’t it? I should’ve known better with touring that he wouldn’t want to settle down and have kids. We’re not even married yet, for fucks sake.

“You’re right, it was a dumb question.” I awkwardly turned around hiding the embarrassment on my face.

“Look at me, Princess. Whenever you’re ready, I’m ready. It wasn’t a dumb question. I’d love to have children with you. I don’t call you Mama, just for fun.” He grabbed me softly, forcing me to look into his eyes. I heard the slight sarcasm towards the end of his sentence.

“You actually wanna have kids, Vin?” My eyes started watering. Of course, he does. We had that conversation very early on in our relationship. Why was I doubting him before? God my brain is so stupid sometimes.

“Of course, my love. In fact, we can start right now.” His brows wiggled in anticipation. After the stove was turned off, our breakfast was long forgotten about as we raced into the bedroom.

Part 2

#miw fanfic #motionless in white #fanfiction #motionless in white fanfic #vinny mauro fanfic #vinny mauro #vinny mauro x reader

[midnightsnyx]

what if i told you (i love you) part 2 - joel miller

pairing: joel miller!fem reader

chapter summary: when joel and ellie's stay turns out to be longer than expected, you have to figure out how you're going to deal with having him around. word count: 1.9k warnings: insinuated smut, angst, mentions of death, mentions of abortion, little bit of fluff(?), and ellie being a cool big sister! let me know if i missed anything please. also this isn't edited lol sorry authors note: GUYS!!!! WHAT THE HECK! thank you all so so so much from the very bottom of my heart for all the love on the story. comments, reblogs, and likes feed my angsty writing soul <3 y'all are the best! please take caution to the warnings for this chapter and read safely <3 if anyone wants to send thoughts, suggestions ect, here is my ask box. and lastly, if you want to be added to my tag list please fill out this super short form here <3 oh one more thing! I know last chapter was in past tense but I hate writing that unless I’m doing flashbacks so from now on, it’s all present tense unless I do a flashback

masterlist what i write series masterpost

Boston 2018

The first time you could blame it on the bad liquor. The second time, you could say it was the adrenaline from nearly getting killed by a pack of clickers but the third time you found yourself underneath Joel Miller, there was nobody to blame but yourself. You’d been working with him and Tess for a couple years and always thought the two of them were together. However, while on a supply run with just Tess about a year after you met them, you discovered that while there was an initial attraction, things were strictly business between them. You really had no plans to deal with the man further than supply runs and trades but after you had a taste of what could be, you didn’t want to go without. 

You knew that things weren’t exclusive and never would be. It was simply a way for the both of you to blow off steam in this shitty world so after you missed your period not once, but twice, you realized that things might be more complicated than you had planned. Approaching Joel about the situation was not something you were looking forward to so you confided in Tess, who after scolding you, said you had two options. She knew a person who “took care of these problems” and could get your situation resolved with little to no damage or you could do what she thought was unfair, and bring a new life into the world that had become so cruel, most didn’t want to live anyway. You weighed your options for about a week, avoiding Joel whenever he tried to get you alone because all you wanted to do was blurt out that you were pregnant to get it off your chest but somehow, you knew how he would react. 

Everybody had lost someone during the outbreak and although it was never confirmed by Joel, you knew he’d lost a child. Somewhere inside you, there was a small hope that maybe this tiny little life inside you could help fill some of the void but it was smashed when you eventually told him.

His cold expression and cold words were hurtful but not unexpected. 

“How could you be so careless?” 

You’d argued with him for over an hour, the whole “it takes two to tangle” argument but eventually you had enough and told him if he wanted nothing to do with it, this was the time because you weren’t going to wait around forever. So when his last words to you were “leave”, you decided then and there that you were done with Joel Miller. You’d waited a few weeks after Tess asked you to even though you knew that he wouldn’t come around. The day you left, you said goodbye to Tess, telling her where you planned to go and told her if Joel asked about you, not to tell him anything. If you could help it, you planned to never see Joel again.

Jackson, Wyoming 2023

Much to your dismay, Joel is at the dining hall the next morning. He’s sitting with Tommy and Ellie but you can feel his eyes on you while you watch Jack eat his breakfast. It’s like a repeat of yesterday, only this time you’re worried that Hazel may have actually poisned his food. She grumbled when he walked in the doors but didn’t say much. 

Ellie eventually makes her way over to where you and Jack are sitting, shyly asking if she can sit with you and play with Jack. You hesitate but Jack gives you puppy eyes and you can never say no to him. Some of his facial expressions always reminded you of Joel but with the man actually being here now, you’re noticing it much more. You look over at him and his eyes are locked on the three of you sitting together so you look back at Ellie.

“So…” you begin, waiting for her to look up at you and when she does, you can see the mischievous look in her eyes. 

“You’re gonna ask me about Joel,” she grins, “y’know, he was talking to Tommy about you last night. They thought I was asleep but there was a lot of yelling.” 

“What exactly were they saying?” you ask, and she looks back at Jack, taking the piece of food he offers her. 

“I dunno, Joel was grumpy that Tommy didn’t tell him that you were here but Tommy told Joel that you didn’t want him to know,” she says, “he’s always grumpy though, so that’s nothing new.” 

You weren’t planning on asking her but you’re dying to know how exactly Joel ended up dragging a teenager all the way to Wyoming. 

“What’s the deal with you and Joel?” you ask, “not a long lost kid, are you?” 

She just laughs and shakes her head, “nah, I mean he acts like a dad but he’s just fulfilling a request from someone. I’m just cargo.” 

She says it non-chalantly but something in her expression changes, so small you barely notice. It’s there though but before you can question her further, she turns the tables back to you.

“What the deal with you and Joel? I mean, clearly the kid is his… did he-”

“Ellie,” a voice cuts in and you both jump, not noticing that Joel somehow snuck up on the both of you. Before either of you can answer, a little voice speaks up.

“Hi,” Jack says, waving at Joel who once again, looks shocked that there’s a child there. The boy offers him a handful of mushed up fruit and you watch as Joel hesitantly accepts it. 

You’ve watched Joel take down countless clickers and raiders so it amuses you that a toddler scares him. 

Jack takes a loud slurp of his water and tries to hand it to Joel before you take it from him, rolling your eyes. Ellie is watching the interaction with amusement and you can even see Tommy from across the hall, watching closely. 

“Who’re you?” Jack asks, trying to pass Joel more food. You take his plate, ignoring his grumbling. Another thing that Jack does that reminds you of Joel are his mood swings. Some days he is a chatterbox and others, you can barely get a peep out of him. Those days, he reminds you of Joel. 

When Joel looks at you, this time with panic written across his face, you shrug. You’re beginning to find this amusing because who knew all it would take is a toddler to break the big Joel Miller.

“Ellie, I have to go with Tommy for a bit. Don’t leave the four walls of this town,” he points at her when she raises her hands in defense, “I told Maria to keep an eye on you.”

“Don’t worry old man, I think I’ll hang out with these two,” she tells him but then shyly looks at you, “if that's alright.” 

You nod and watch as her face lights up. She goes back to talking to the little boy sitting next to her and you look at Joel who is shifting uncomfortably. 

“Uh, thanks,” he mumbles without looking at you before quickly walking back to Tommy. You watch the two of them leave, the older man casting one more glance you way before his brother pats him on the back firmly.

“He’s got it bad for you,” Ellie says absently, “like real bad. Were you two like, together?”

You stare at her for a solid minute, wondering where the hell this kid came from. Was she this blunt before? Or has Joel corrupted her?

“It’s complicated, and a long story.”

“Is it longer than a week? ‘Cause I think that’s how long we’re staying,” she says and you hide a frown. You’re still trying to find out exactly why they’re here and now you find out they’re only staying a week? You can’t decide if you are relieved or disappointed. 

“Why don’t we go for a walk?” You offer, wanting to get out of this conversation because talking about your non existent relationship with Joel to a 14 year old is at the bottom of your to-do list. “Jack likes seeing the sheep and horses.”

Ellie grins and you can’t help but smile when she offers her hand to Jack who accepts it eagerly. You can tell she’s trying to fill a void and you’re beginning not to mind.

. . .

Later that night after Jack is long asleep, you sit outside on your porch wrapped up in a winter jacket and blanket. It’s cold but you need some fresh air to try and get your thoughts straightened out. Ellie tried to bring up yours and Joel’s history multiple times but eventually gave up on it once she realized you weren’t going to say anything. You haven’t seen Joel since this morning, spending the day with Ellie and Jack, then eating dinner and dropping the girl off at the house she and Joel are staying at before going back to your own and putting your kid to bed.

Joel showing up out of the blue is bringing back too many memories, some good but some bad. 

Suddenly, a voice breaks you out of your thoughts and you curse Joel Miller again for sneaking up on you. Being in Jackson so long is making you let your guard down too much.

“Hey,” he says, standing at the bottom of your porch steps awkwardly, “the kid gone to bed?” 

Small talk. He is trying to make small talk. 

“What do you want, Joel?” You ask shortly, half wanting to leave before he says anything else but if he is seeking you out, you want to know what he is looking for from you.

“I, uh, I wanted to say thanks,” he says stumbling over his words, “for entertaining Ellie today. She was real pleased-”

“I didn’t do it for you,” you snap, “she’s a good kid.”

He just nods, staring at the ground and scuffing his boots on the dirt. You watch as he clears his throat and looks up at you, a sadness in his eyes that you’re not sure you’ve ever seen.

“Tess is gone,” he says, and even though you had your suspicions since she’s not with him and he travelling all the way here, his words feel like a punch in the stomach. 

“How?” 

“She got bit on our way here,” he tells you and you just nod, swallowing back tears. Six years ago, you might’ve let him comfort you but all you want now is to yell or scream at him. Ellie wouldn’t tell you why they were here or why she was with Joel and you know you won’t get anything out of him. You know the only reason for his late night visit is to break the news about Tess.

When you stand up, his mouth opens to protest but he just offers you the closest thing he has to a smile. It’s pitiful. 

You turn to walk inside but his voice stops you. Refusing to look at him, you pause but stay facing the door.

“He seems like a good kid,” he says quietly and you know he’s referring to Jack.

There’s a million things you can say to him, you can turn around and yell or scream at him. You could ask him why? Why did you push me away when I needed you? Why didn’t you want Jack? What hurt you so bad, that you couldn’t accept him?

Instead, you walk inside your house and close the door behind you.

. . .  

tag list: @sloanexx @wandering-poetess @o-sacra-virgo-laudes-tibii

@chiogarza @jellybeanxc @iranispunk @imonmykneessir @wakaladjarin @sleepylunarwolf @pedropascalfan221 @abovenyx

@starjoyyy @shuriri4life @cavillary

if i didn't tag you & you asked to be, it's cause you didn't show up when i tried! if it didn't work, msg me & we'll figure it out :)

#joel miller x y/n #joel miller imagine #joel miller reader insert #joel miller x reader #tlou fanfiction #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller fic #joel miller x you #allies writing

[hyunfilms]

blue side of the sky (lmh) | five.

♡ spotify playlist | series masterlist

—summary: waking up after 3 months with no recollection of your past, your friends do what they can to help you remember. except, they omit an important piece to the puzzle - afraid you would remember the heartbreak and hurt all over again.

—pairing: lee know x f. reader

—genre: (18+) exes to lovers, bestfriends to lovers au | fluff, angst, (eventual) smut

—word count: 5.3k

—chapter warning: cussing, jisung being his worried and overprotective self, small argument between minho & jisung, another deep look into minho's feelings about everything, minho dance session which should be a warning itself, smut but not super descriptive smut (implied oral - m. receiving, doggy style), also a look into minho and kat, flashback scene at the end highlighting a core, painful moment for minho, crying, oc is in a coma during flashback

"Hi." You answer the phone call coming in as you make your way to your first pottery class.

"Cielo! Are you at class now?" You chuckle.

"About to be."

"You didn't answer my text." You can hear the pout through Jisung's tone.

"Sorry, pachi. I was gonna get to it as soon as I got inside the store. What's up?"

"I asked if you found anything to wear yet. For Yuna's?"

"Oh, no."

"Wanna go look after class? I'll meet you."

"I'm, um—" You pause a bit as you enter the store and greet the boy re-stocking items at the front.

"You're.. what?"

"I'm actually hanging out with San afterwards. He said he'd go with me to check out some dresses."

"You're.. hanging out with San?"

"Yes?" You let out a small sigh due to the unexpected response from your bestfriend. You felt nervous, and even more scared. Maybe you shouldn't have agreed to hang out with San. "Pachi, you told me to go for it. Should I just cancel and go with you—"

"No, no. I know I said that. I'm sorry, cielo. I didn't mean it in a bad way. I'm glad you're hanging out with him and stuff! Seriously. I just didn't expect that day to be today."

"I don't exactly have much time to find a dress."

"Yeah, I know. You'll find something and you'll look great in it, though! Is he gonna meet you after class?"

"Mhm."

"Okay, good. Well, enjoy yourself, okay? Don't think too much and just go with the flow."

"I know, I know."

"Well wait, let me back track." Jisung lets out a sigh. "I'm sorry. Are you ready to hang out with him? I hope I didn't pressure you too much."

"No it's not that. I think I'm ready. I mean, it's casual and super harmless, right?"

"Of course. He seems cool. But if he does try anything that you aren't ready for, just call me."

"I'll be fine. Thanks, Ji."

"Alright. Send pics of what you find!"

"I will." Your bottom lip pokes out as you end the call and tuck your phone back into your bag. This morning, you felt your confidence growing. You had been confident enough to agree to a hang out with San, even though he reassured you that there was no pressure. But the call with Jisung had you second-guessing everything.

Were you really ready for this?

You know Jisung meant no harm behind anything he said, but it was hard for you to not overthink. The only thing getting you by is the reminder that you have to experience these things to continue learning and settling back into the world; to continue living.

You couldn't be stuck in one place forever.

"Are you okay, miss?" You look over to your right and see the same boy from the front stocking up some of the shelves near the pottery classroom. You hadn't realized you zoned out and stopped in your tracks before entering the room.

"Oh. Yeah, I am." You chuckle shyly. "Sorry. Was lost in thought."

"No worries, just wanted to make sure you were okay."

"Thank you." You give him a small smile before finally entering the classroom. It's only supposed to be for 6 people, and you only see one other person already sitting at a wheel. You take the seat opposite from her, giving her a small smile when she glances up to look at you. She returns the smile, but her attention shifts back to her phone.

It doesn't take long before the rest of the wheels are filled and class is starting. You feel incredibly shy, but everyone in your class seems to be down to earth and just as eager to get their hands dirty. At first, you feel shy. You're barely working on the clay as much as the others are, but you remind yourself that you work at your own pace. When it's time to throw, it's a bit of a struggle before you finally find your own rhythm; receiving small praises from your instructor as she comes to your aid every now and then.

You're making a basic pot. Something to start off with, something easy.

It's fun.

You're happy you decided to move forward with class, paying some money for a membership to use the classroom during open hours. Class takes an hour and a half today, but the classroom remains open for anyone who is interested in doing another piece before the kiln gets loaded in a class or two. You wish you could, but as soon as you let your pot sit on the rack to completely dry, you catch wind of San walking around nearby aisles. He sees you looking over and he waves, a huge smile plastered on his face while you continue to clean up your space. When you've finally gotten through the last items and tidied up, you quickly wash your hands and grab your things to meet San in the store.

"Hey!" He waves enthusiastically. "How was class?" He digs his hands into his pocket while he waits for your response.

"It was good! Fun to get back into it." San nods.

"I'm glad. It's always satisfying to get back into things you've enjoyed." He nods towards the entrance. "It's beautiful outside. Ready to shop for dresses? You can tell me more about class while we walk."

"Sure." You chuckle. "What have you been up to today?"

"Well, I started off my day super early. Went to the gym before work. Got lots of things done. Now I'm here." He gives you a small smile. Over the course of texting San, you find out a few key details about him:

One, he has a younger sister and a cat that he adores. He's very family-oriented and takes everything family-related very seriously. He met JJ and their friend group in college, and they've stayed close ever since then. He also adores his friends to bits; it's quite cute. He says their personalities are all different, but they mesh so well.

Two, he was the definition of someone who took every single opportunity [especially in college] and ran with it. He aced his classes, participated in campus-wide activities and student government, volunteered, took internship after internship— that being what lead him to a huge opportunity overseas right after graduation to learn side by side from a principal architect. Years of doing so led him to a full-time position with their office back here at home.

Three, he is handsome, and he is incredibly sweet. He's laid back and caring; it's very easy to see why he gets along with people.

It's easy to talk to him.

So easy, that time flies by when you're with him. After a long, ongoing conversation about how the days have been, you've already popped into a few shops; slowly pulling hangers apart from each other to get a better view of the dresses— no particular dress catching your eyes just yet.

You eventually do find two dresses in the back of a new store you popped into that look fantastic on the mannequin, however, you feel like it'll be a different story when you try it on. Jisung says the wedding is at a hotel near the oceanside two hours away. The colors are hues of sage, green, browns and pale golds, and you're already excited to see how everything will turn out.

One dress is a taupe satin dress with a high slit, spaghetti straps and a cowl neck-line. The other is a sage satin dress with an asymmetrical high slit. They're almost similar in style— you're just not sure which color [or fit] would look better on you. San can tell you're unsure as you look at both dresses side by side, hands trailing down the fabric.

"Those are really pretty. You should try them on. You'll look great in either of those." San smiles.

"They're not too.. simple?" San shrugs.

"No. I think they're perfect for the wedding." You give him a small smile and nod, walking off to dressing room. San finds a little cushion to sit and wait on, scrolling through his phone while he patiently waits for you to be ready. He's not expecting you to show him the dresses, and quite frankly, he hopes he didn't come off that way. He does believe you'll look good in whatever option you choose, and his opinion doesn't matter much at the end of the day— it's truly whatever you feel good and comfortable in. Of course, San thinks you're gorgeous. He really couldn't help himself that day he walked into the café and saw you. Of course, his end goal would be to take you on a date and see where thing goes. But, the thing about San is that he knows about your accident. He knows the overall gist of things that have happened, but he doesn't know the fine details like your friends or JJ might know. It's not his business anyway, and he'd rather not go back to that moment in your life. So, he doesn't ask. He'll let you open up to him about it once [and if] you're ready. But, he knows. And he knows this isn't a priority for you right now, which is completely understandable.

If things happen, things happen. If it takes time, it takes time. Until then, he will continue to get to know you and be a friend.

"San?" San is pulled out of his thoughts when he hears you softly call his name behind the dressing room door.

"Yeah? You okay?"

"Yeah, I just.. is it okay if I show you the first dress?"

"Of course, whatever you're comfortable with, Y/N."

"I just need you to see them and give me your honest opinion, okay?"

"Always." He hears the door handle jiggle before you swing the door open. You've tried on the taupe dress and you shyly come forward, hands fidgeting with the fabric of the dress. San sits up a bit as his eyes light up, nodding in acknowledgement with a small smile. "That color looks great on you."

"Is the dress okay? It feels a little too much." You fiddle with your fingers. "I feel like I can't comfortably move with how high this slit goes."

"The angle too, hm?" He nods. "It looks great, but if you're not comfortable, then maybe the next dress will feel better?" You nod.

"Yeah, maybe."

"It's fine Y/N, don't force yourself if you aren't 100% on it." You give him a small smile before walking back into the dressing room to try on the other dress. You also aren't expecting much with this dress, but as soon as you slip it on, you smile at yourself in the mirror and take it in for a moment.

It feels perfect.

The slit is also pretty high, but it's not asymmetrical and at a weird angle so you can still move around comfortably. It fits nicely on your body, your figure, and the fabric isn't too heavy. Taupe color is beautiful under the light, and it's easy to pair.

"I really like this one." You say softly and San lets out a small chuckle.

"That's good. I'm glad you do." He watches as you walk out and nods in agreement when he sees how much more relaxed you look in the dress. "You look beautiful. That dress is the one!" You shyly chuckle at him.

"Yeah, I think it is, too."

"Are you set on it, or do you still wanna look some more?"

"No, I'm pretty set on this." San stands with a smile.

"Nice, it's perfect. We can go eat somewhere after, if you'd like?"

"Oh yes, please. I'm starving. I'm sorry I dragged you along on this." You say as you shut the door and start to get changed.

"No, don't apologize. I meant it when I said I didn't mind. I'm happy to accompany you." San scratches at his temple and nervously laughs. "I honestly thought we'd take much longer, so I'm a little relieved we can eat now." You laugh and gather your things, handing the other dress to the staff member before walking to the cashier.

Afterwards, San takes you to a bbq spot out of the central downtown area, roughly a 15 minute drive out. You get seated pretty quickly even though the restaurant is becoming packed by the minute. It's not too loud, but it is bustling; with busy workers and people engaging in fun conversation over beer and soju. In the middle of grilling the meat and telling you his Spain experience, you get a call from Jisung— the constant vibration on the table pulling you away from San's story.

"Sorry. It's Jisung." San chuckles and shakes his head, placing a few pieces of samgyeopsal onto your plate.

"No, please. Go for it." You give him a small apologetic smile before picking up the call. Jisung is at home, bored out of his mind and a bit worried. He knew he needed to give you time to do your thing, but as dinner time was approaching, he couldn't help but check in. He just needed to know that you were okay and at least enjoying yourself.

"Pachi."

"Hi, sorry." He says. "I didn't hear from you for awhile so I just wanted to call." You chuckle a bit.

"I'm okay."

"Yeah? That's good to hear." He furrows his brows at the background noise. "It's kinda.. loud? Where are you?"

"Eating with San."

"Oh, okay. Did you find a dress?"

"Sure did. Oops, I'll send pictures to you after." You did remember to snap a few photos of the dresses you tried on earlier.

"No worries. It's not too crazy there, right?"

"No. I'll be okay. We'll be done soon."

"Okay. Please text me when you get home."

"I will."

"Love you."

"Love you too." You softly set the phone down and look at San. "I really am sorry about him."

"No, it's okay." San shrugs. "I get it. He's your bestfriend and he cares about you alot."

"Too much sometimes." You tease, though you try to hint at the fact that you are very grateful for Jisung no matter what.

Meanwhile, Jisung finds himself getting hungrier by the minute, finalizing his delivery order that shouldn't arrive too long from now. He's home alone while his roommates are all out, so he tries to pick up where he left off in God of War: Ragnarok to make time fly by. The delivery food actually comes a half hour later, with Jisung shutting off the game before darting down the stairs to grab his food. Just as he's bringing it in, he sees Minho pull up and park— leaving the door slightly ajar for when he walks in.

"Yo." Jisung quickly looks over his shoulder as he continues to unbox his delivery food, quickly greeting Minho as he walks into the kitchen. "Surprised you're home early."

"Surprised you're home since you're usually taking all the food at Y/N's and Uncle Adrian's."

"That's not true at all and you know it." Jisung looks at Minho while he chuckles at him and grabs a glass for some water. "Seriously, why are you home early?"

"I just wanted to come home early and not do something for once. Catch up on sleep. Be lazy."

"We can play, if you want?"

"Eh." Minho shrugs after drinking some water. "Maybe later."

"I'm also surprised—" Jisung shakes his head. "Nevermind."

"Say it."

"No, you'll kill me and Y/N isn't around to save me."

"What, she's still in class?" Minho asks with a chuckle, confused at how long your pottery class actually was.

"No, she's out shopping for a dress."

"Alone? Shouldn't someone be with her if she's gonna be out for a bit?"

"Someone is with her." Jisung mumbles as he pours some of his soup appetizer into a bowl.

"And it's not you?" Jisung shakes his head. "Chan?" Jisung shakes his head again. "Seungmin? Why on earth would you leave her with Seungmin, though?"

"I didn't leave her with Seungmin. I didn't leave her anywhere, she just had other plans." Jisung grabs his food and tries to head up to his room. Which, he successfully does, but Minho is following closely behind. "Gonna watch some streams since you don't wanna play, see ya—" Minho kicks his foot out to stop his door from closing.

"Why are you acting so weird?" Minho nods at him and furrows his brows. "You're the one who told me to stop being weird when it comes to Y/N, you little hypocrite."

"I'm not being weird!"

"You are!"

"She's in good hands, alright? It's fine."

"She's with San, isn't she?"

"I never even said anything. "

"See, you're being fucking weird for no reason."

"Well, I don't know? It's kinda weird to tell you!"

"This was your idea in the first place, remember?" Minho sighs and crosses his arms. "I just wanted to know if she was okay. Besides, how do you know if she's in good hands with San? He doesn't even know anything about her like that."

"You really think JJ wouldn't have said anything to him?"

"I don't think so?"

"He's one of JJ's really good friends, I think he might know some portion of it."

"Then, he's not any better than you and I, is he?" Minho cocks his head to the side and looks at him.

"Please don't do that." Jisung sighs. "She's fine, okay? He seems cool. I think we can give him a little more than that."

"What's your plan behind this one?"

"Don't even say it like that, dude. For real." Jisung's brow is slightly furrowed, though this is something he fully expects from Minho. "I just thought it'd be cool for her to hang out with other people too. It doesn't hurt."

"Hm." Minho hums as he turns on his heel and walks towards his room.

"Where are you going?"

"Change of plans. Gonna head to the studio and work on some stuff."

"Wait, you're not upset, are you?" Jisung pouts a bit. He really didn't mean to make Minho upset even though he knows you're still a very sensitive subject to him. Plus, Jisung doesn't want this to spiral out of control. He'll give you some time, but he will tell you everything. He will.

"Upset?" Minho slings his bag over his shoulder and gives him a tiny pursed smile. "No. Can't be." There's a drip of sarcasm in his tone because of course he can't be. There's so many truths, feelings, opinions, clinging onto that statement alone. He's trying to convince himself that he can't be, but also, he knows this is the response he'd immediately get from everyone around him. And he hates that.

Because no matter what, they will never understand you two. They will never understand the thoughts, the feelings, that occupy his mind day in and day out— especially since the accident happened.

He feels.

No one seems to know that.

But to simply answer Jisung's question, yes. He is upset. He really hopes you're okay and that San is taking care of you. It's the least he can fucking do after charming you the way he did. He's upset because of many other things, he's upset because he finds himself dwelling on the past much longer than he needs to. He finds himself sinking into all the 'what if's' — finding it hard to focus on his present, to look forward to his future.

He's constantly sinking, with nothing in reach.

He heads to the studio just like he tells Jisung, but he doesn't have class. There's nothing scheduled at the studio, so there shouldn't be anyone around.

It's fine.

That's what he needs right now, anyway. Space to do his own thing, space to dance out all the frustrations. Space to shake off all this shit.

When he gets to the studio, he parks his car and unlocks the door with his own key; tossing his bag off to the side as he steps into the room. He instantly connects his phone to the speakers, blasting his more upbeat playlist throughout the room. He stretches as the mirrors vibrate to the beat of the song currently playing, lights dim and barely illuminating the space.

He lets everything go.

He just needs to, momentarily.

He lets the vibration sink through his body, letting it flow through in waves— just like with everything that's been happening. It's the only way he's been able to process. He has some choreography he needs to finish up before next class but that's the last thing on his mind right now.

The first wave, Minho felt numb. He couldn't believe how everything happened so quickly. You were just in front of him— only to be snatched away hours later. He wasn't sure what to do, how to gain power to change time, didn't know what life would be like with you. It was all too much to process knowing you were almost taken from him completely.

The second wave, Minho was angry, upset, frustrated; all the time. He had no outlet, and as fucked up as it sounds, this is how he brought Kat closer. He felt empty, he felt angry with himself, he felt like he needed some validation. Something to tell him he wasn't entirely at fault, that he was still a person who could be needed, wanted; that he wasn't a bad person although he did need to take ownership for some things at some point.

The third wave that he's currently riding, Minho has nothing else to give. Nothing else to process. He feels useless, powerless— he can't change time or bring anything back. There is simply nothing there and he doesn't know how to work with that in order to move forward. What can he change, how can he do better, when no one believes he can change and do better for you? No one wants to give him that. And quite frankly, they're slowly convincing him that he can't even give himself that.

Maybe it'll go back to the first wave and he'll go back to being numb. But Minho doesn't know what's worse— being numb because it's too much to process, or being numb because there is nothing else to process; nothing else to change, nothing to hang onto.

He doesn't know if he'll ever bounce back from this.

Minho is so into his thoughts as he dances without a strict choreo in mind, sweat dripping down his face as he takes a moment to catch his breath. He sits with his back against the mirror, regulating his breathing after consistently moving his body. He takes a quick sip of water, eyes darting to his phone lighting up on the counter. The vibration is cutting through the music, making Minho groan in annoyance at the interruption.

kat: roommates are gone

kat: lonely af

kat: can you come over? )):

He thinks about this, and to be honest, he still feels pretty shitty. It's a terrible excuse, but who else can he run to right now? Kat makes him feel good. Kat makes him feel better, at least, enough to push him through in the meantime.

minho: be over in a bit. at the studio.

Kat, however, will never be you. She temporarily fills the void, but she will never be you.

From before, from now.

kat: can u stop by for some food?

minho: i'm only coming by for a bit. i have to be up early tomorrow.

kat: yeah ofc whats new

Minho rolls his eyes as he sets his phone aside and continues to dance around the empty studio for a bit until he feels somewhat content. He drags his duffle bag to the separate staff locker room, quickly using the shower before changing into a fresh pair of sweats and a hoodie. He ruffles his damp hair a bit as he walks out into the fresh night air, tossing his bag into the trunk before making his journey to Kat's apartment.

At this point, he's not entirely in the mood to see her. But, he's here just like he says— and he only plans to stay for a quick minute before he's rushing home.

Just like he says.

"Oh, you really didn't stop by for food." Kat snickers a bit before stepping aside to let him in.

"Why would I when I said no?" Minho confusingly chuckles a bit. "Told you I was only coming for a bit. I'm beat."

"Uh huh." She says. "I missed you." She pouts. "I barely heard from you today." He watches her as she wraps her arms around his neck, kissing him on the lips even though he barely returns the effort.

"I was busy."

"You could at least tell me that." She whines as she laces her hand with his.

"Sorry." Is all he can say even though he doesn't really mean it. She is not you; from before, from now. "I'll let you know next time." He follows up and uses it as leverage to kiss her again. "I'm here now, aren't I?" He says in between kisses, sinking into her touch and her lips when she lets out soft moans against him.

This is right where he needs her to be. This is the release he needs, the temporary void he needs filled.

She knows what this is, for the most part. She knows Minho could never be serious with her, though she tries. Hoping one day, he will. Hoping one day, he'll finally move past you and give her a shot.

But, he won't. He never will. And if the accident taught him one thing, it's the fact that he will never, ever give you up again.

She takes the lead and rushes him to the room, clothes flying in all directions until they're decorating the floor. She pushes him onto the bed, legs dangling off the edge while she crouches down and wraps her lips around his length. He hisses a bit, fingers laced in her hair as he pushes her down more, and more.

More;

'Till she takes all of him.

He can't deny that it feels amazing, but he doesn't wanna leave it at that. He's not always a taker, only if Kat reassures that she wants to please him and him only. So, before he feels himself reaching his peak, Minho gently tugs her head off— praising her as he gets her on all fours. He's not wasting any time, no. He enters her and bottoms out quick, finding the perfect rhythm in no time.

He needs to get out.

He doesn't necessarily take his time as much as Kat wants him to. She's screaming his name like a mantra, head pushed against her pillow while Minho continues to do his work behind her. It doesn't take long before she's like putty in his hands and he's stupidly pulling out to spill his seed all over her ass, back.

He needs to get out. Now.

So, he comes back down from his high, regulates his breathing and hops off her bed. He's quickly throwing his clothes back on while Kat is confusingly doing the same. She's asking him why he's been doing this lately, and he doesn't really know how to explain to her that he's just feeling more and more disconnected to this whole thing— to her. She's still continuing though; arms crossed tightly against her chest as she follows Minho out to the door, tears threatening to spill over her bottom lid. He's not focused on her, to be honest, and he's exhausted. Not much is registering for him besides his lazy 'I'm sorry's' and 'I'll spend more time with you the next time I'm over.' But the one thing that does snap him out of everything is when Kat asks—

"It's because of Y/N isn't it?" He stops in his tracks right as he's about to swing the door open and turns over his shoulder to glare at her. "Ever since she woke up—"

"Don't." He says sternly. "You don't get to do that." His jaw clenches. "Do me a favor and don't bring Y/N up again." He swings the door and slams it shut, suddenly feeling emptier than he did before he got here.

Maybe this wave would be the hardest.

☁︎ FLASHBACK | HOSPITAL

"Are you going to come with us to the hospital to visit Y/N tomorrow?" Minho shakes his head at Seungmin.

"Probably not. You guys can go without me." He says softly as he scribbles some notes into his notepad for the small, upcoming café renovations.

"You sure?" Seungmin softly asks and all Minho can do is nod without meeting his eyes. Seungmin lets out a soft sigh before he grabs his keys sitting on the dining room table. "Gotta head back into the office really quickly to drop something off. See you later?"

"Yeah." Is all Minho says, still avoiding contact until Seungmin is out of the door. He lets out a deep sigh, dropping his pen onto the notepad.

He doesn't even remember what he needed to write.

He checks the time on his watch, hand close to hitting 4 o'clock. He groans to himself, shutting his notebook before grabbing his own keys from the other end of the kitchen table.

He hopes he doesn't regret this.

Though, he kinda does when he slaps the visitor tag on his sweater and proceeds to your room. Then, it grows when he stands at your doorway and sees you lying perfectly still on your bed. He digs his hands into his pockets and remains there for a moment, afraid to move closer, yet his feet aren't taking him away from your room. He musters up the courage about a min later, slowly walking towards your bed side.

Even through all the pain and hurt you've been through, you still looked so, so angelic.

"Hey." He says, close to a whisper— voice slightly cracking because he doesn't know what he's feeling right now as he looks at you. Is he angry at himself for coming here when things were't changing anytime soon? Is he angry he could've done better? Is he angry for the way the universe is playing such a sick fucking joke on him right now?

Because you're in reach and out of reach at the same time.

Minho gains more courage to pull his chair closer to your bedside so that he doesn't have to lean too far to get a good look at you. The only sounds filling the room are the beeping machines and the people passing in the hallway outside.

"Y/N." He calls your name as he gently brushes the hair back and away from your face. "Hope you're doing okay." He feels so stupid. Why would he say that? His thumb caresses your cheek before it slides down to your hand. It isn't too cold, but the warmth in your body has subsided.

The warmth in your body is fighting to stay.

"I-I—" He pauses to lick his lips. "I miss you." No response. "God, I miss you." He feels the tears welling up and his head drops. He holds your hand tightly and squeezes, hoping he can feel anything on your end.

But, nothing.

"I'm so sorry." He whispers just as he's remembering every detail about you, the moments he's shared with you, the feelings, your touch—

The way you smile, the way you laugh.

The way you always kiss his fingers and look at him in pure adoration.

The way you bring the sun and blue skies into every room.

"I fucked up and I'm so, so sorry." He continues to whisper as he cries harder, head falling near your lap as he continues hold your hand. "I'm so sorry." He repeats.

He should've kept his word.

He should've done better.

He should've protected you.

"I should've done better. I shouldn't have let you go, and I'll never forgive myself for being so fucking stupid." He looks up at you through his teary eyes before returning his head back near your lap. "I get it. I would never want you to be in pain. Or, to hurt. All I want is for you to be okay. But, if you can at least hear me right now—" He pauses as his crying intensifies. "Please don't give up on me. I know I fucked up and I know I have no right to ask you for this, but please don't leave me." It's barely audible through his crying, but he's hoping it will somehow reach you. "Please don't leave me."

☁︎ END

♡ taglist: @lotus-dly​ @jihanlovic​ @meloncremesoda​ @hoes4lino​ @skzddicted​ @skzho @edgaralienpoe​ @harui-zen​ @bestleeknowstan​ @havenwithleeknow​ @septicrebel​ @heesdazed​ @borahae-reads​ @yoontaethings​ @pearbunny​ @bintificreads​ @lukeys-giggle​ @ajxreads @everglowdaisies​ @allaboutsan​ @endzii23​ @leeknowsramen @heres-your-ramen2000​ @morningstardada​ @mal-lunar-28​ @downbadreading​ @lilysophie @feelikecinderella​ @urmomma0324​ @ddazed-lhs​ @djeniryuu​ @melanctton​ @i8rsie​ @maru-matt​ @sleepyleeji​ @taerifin​ @nattisbored​

#lee know series #lee know fanfic #minho fanfic #minho series #lee know x reader #minho x reader #stray kids series #stray kids fanfiction #stray kids x reader #lee know angst #lee know fluff #lee know smut #minho angst #minho fluff #minho smut #hyunfilms: blue side of the sky

[maggiedanikka]

Let Me Go || Part 3

Pairing: Hangman x f!reader, Rooster x f!reader

Warnings: ANGST

Word Count: 3.9k

Summary: Reader is married to and shares a child with Hangman. Life and circumstances drives reader into Rooster’s arms, but Hangman isn’t giving up that easily. 

Author’s Note: Hi! First of all all thank you for all the kind comments and your general interest in this little story of mine. I do apologize about how late this chapter is comin out. I fully intended on posting sooner but I had to continuously stop and reflect on where I am taking this story, because I don’t have a plan written down or anything, everything is literally coming straight out of my head. My editor ( @jhelly-bean)  is VERY nitpicky. Also, this chapter is the longest so far. I know I left you all on a cliff hanger on the last part and many of you are probably anticipating the continuation of that scene but patience my loves, I promise you will see how that scene ends soon. This chapter is lacking Hangman, so I do apologize in advanced to the Jake stans, but do not fret he will be back again soon. To my Rooster fans, I hope his official entrance into the story fills the Bradley void of the last two parts. Warning: this is very flashback heavy.

Rooster Playlist:

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4tS2I0YnKUSrBOMSUCqLgh?si=6a1898d0be474904

Hangman Playlist:

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2z4lAcBPvbCx19NWni8DVS?si=f7da4ba91773424e

Italics is past

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9

The weight in your chest still did not lift. Even after you pulled out of the driveway, into the parking lot of the firm, and all the way into your office. 

The last thing you should be feeling is guilt, but the way that Jake asked you that last question sounded so defeated, and maybe a little hopeful? Hopeful that you’ll deny the claims that he had no doubt he’d heard about your involvement with a certain pilot. One with a fowl themed call sign. 

That was the unfortunate part of being the spouse of the top 1% of naval pilots, the circles were small and gossip spread fast.

Yet somehow, no one had the decency to tell you of Jake’s wrongdoing until it quite literally was in front of your face. 

You sighed as you tried to focus on the depositions in front of you, this particular case had left you busy and stressed for the past week and a half. 

You felt your stomach grumble and glanced at the clock on your desk, it read 1pm. You usually had lunch around 12pm, but the heartache that was this morning and the work that you desperately tried to bury yourself under caused you to be unaware of the time. Up until your stomach started to scream at you.

You reached into the drawer where you normally keep your packed lunch, and mentally cursed yourself as you remembered that it was still sitting on your kitchen island. You were so quick to leave the house after Jake’s arrival that you forgot to grab it on the way out. 

You were far too busy to go out and get something, and even if you weren’t buried in work. The only good places nearby were fast food places.

Which you would not normally be opposed to, but after a particularly busy and lazy week in the not so distant past, where you and your 4 year old were left no choice but to only eat McDonalds for a full week. You promised yourself that you would never eat the stuff again. It also helped that even the sight of a cheeseburger made you sick to your stomach.

You groaned and hoped that you still had some TUMS left in your desk to prepare for the inevitable ulcer you would get for not eating. You sigh in disappointment once you realize you did not have any left.

What a day this day has surely become. 

You were about to return to work when a buzz from your secretary disrupted your focus. You pressed the call button.

“Yes?” 

“Sorry to bother you Attorney (y/l/n), but there is a delivery for you.” Your secretary explained apologetically.

“Okay bring it in.” You wondered what was being sent to you and more importantly who sent it.

You were surprised to see your secretary bring in Tupperware of what appeared to be a home cooked meal. You open the pack to see your favorite food neatly packed with a bottle of your favorite juice. 

 You thanked your secretary as you grabbed the sticky note that came with the food.

“Knowing you and how your morning could’ve possibly went, figured you would need this” 

                                                                                                                       -B

You smiled knowing exactly who this delicious package came from.

You sent the culprit a quick text:

“Thank you :) you are literally my savior.” 

After eating your meal. You returned to work, until your phone received a notification less than 5 minutes later. 

“You’re giving me too much credit, just had some extra this morning, just thought I’d share.” 

“Well still, thank you, I couldn’t have gotten through the afternoon without your share.” You replied.

You put your phone down and put it on silent as you returned to your work. By the time you finally brought your head up from all the files and papers you were staring at, it was almost 5. 

Your stomach churned as you remembered what or rather who was waiting for you at home. You’re usually excited to go home to your little girl and you couldn’t wait to see her. Her 6’0 father however was another story. You needed some time to think and unwind after the day you had. 

You went into your messages to text someone and saw they already read your mind.

“Wanna meet after work?” 

 You smiled as you sent your reply. “Yes, I’d love to.”

________________________________________________________________

The Hub was a local hotspot in the town that you've called home the past almost 3 years. It was no Hard Deck, but it was hard to think about that place after all the memories it had given you.

“(Y/n)” You heard a voice say. You smiled as you came face to face with none other than Lt. Bradley “Rooster” Bradshaw.

Astrid was a 1 year old, nearing 2. You were doing your weekly grocery shopping, and it was definitely one of those days. 

You had a meeting early this morning at the firm, you knew it was important because only you and a particularly snooty co-worker who SWORE she was Elle Woods. Despite her lacking the charisma of Reese Witherspoon and her propensity to belittle you, was invited. 

Unfortunately, the sitter bailed last minute and you were of course forced to stay home, thus losing out on a big case to said Legally Blonde wannabe. You were forced to now work under a fake nice barbie who smugly told you to “take the rest of the day off to take care of your…messy life.”

Now you were in the middle of the cereal aisle with a crying baby, who would not calm down no matter what you did. 

People started to give you pitiful looks, some looks of disgust as they assumed that you were an unmarried single mother. Though at this point you might as well be. You hadn’t seen or heard from Jake in over 4 months since he was shipped off on some top secret mission to either South America or Asia, the details you could not remember as you were trying to calm down your irritated child.

“What’s wrong sweetheart? I just changed your diaper. Are you hungry? Do you have a big burp that won’t come out? You want mommy to help you?” You cooed at your baby as you rubbed comforting circles on her back

“I can probably burp myself but thank you for the offer ma’am.” A gruff voice said behind you.

You turned your head to find the source of the remark.

Slight recognition flashed on your face.

He was tall, probably just as tall as Jake and just as built. He wore an open Hawaiian shirt with a white tank under with a pair of vintage ray ban sunglasses. He had a dopey smile under a manicured…pornstache? That sealed it, you knew exactly who this man was. 

He used to frequent the Hard Deck, back when you worked the bar. You knew he grew up in the area and often heard about the famous Bradley Bradshaw. Two years before you met Jake, was the first time you ever laid eyes on Rooster.

You heard stories about Rooster’s old man and how he also was a navy pilot, mostly from your mother who worked the bar when the aforementioned Goose trained at North Island.

Your mother used to go on and on about her schoolgirl crush on the pilot, wanting nothing more than to have the sweet goofy pilot notice her. But she stood no chance against Carole Bradshaw and the love that Goose held for her. She spoke of the grief that she saw overtake Carole when Goose passed, and how it loomed over her until the day she died. 

You never quite understood how someone could love another person that much, your father and mother certainly did not hold that same special bond, considering he left before you turned 5. 

Rooster was just as cocky as all of the other Top Gun pilots but he didn’t take himself as seriously as the others. The first time that he unplugged the Jukebox at the Hard Deck and sang on the old out of tune piano, you were mesmerized. The way his fingers danced across the keys, his voice coming out a little rough. The way he moved his head to the sound of the music, and how his Ray Bans moved lower down his face as he sang his song. It was enough to drive any woman crazy. 

If Goose was just half as confident and enthralling as his son, you could finally understand why your mother was so head over heels. 

You never actually talked to him at the Hard Deck, he finished his Top Gun training and you moved on with your life. The small crush you had for the pilot moving to the back of your mind. Then, you of course met Jake and no one else mattered after that. 

But nevertheless, you still heard of Rooster, his skill as a pilot, and how he hardly ever let anything under his skin. It drove your husband insane. Jake called him his “rival”, calling him the “Maverick to his Iceman”. You often just chuckled at his dramatics and listened in amusement as Jake would go on his monthly tirade about the other pilot. 

Which is how you knew who exactly the man in front of you was. 

“Are you flirting with me?” You asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Because I’m a married woman Lieutenant, and you seem to have lost your manners.” You feigned offense as you continued to rock your crying baby.

His dopey grin dropped, “oh no, I’m sorry ma’am I didn’t know. I didn’t mean to disrespect you, I just.. I’m so-” 

You dropped your pseudo annoyance and interrupted with a small laugh.

“I'm just kidding.” 

You saw the redness form on his cheeks, but his dopey grin returned to his face. 

“Well I am still sorry ma’am, that was no way to address a lady.” 

You offer him a kind smile. Your baby seemed to have calmed down, you placed her back into the carseat in your shopping cart and went to grab the Frosted Flakes on the top shelf, and you to no surprise failed to reach it, yet you still continued to try.

Rooster watched you struggle with amusement clear on his face, he gave you a few more seconds before he came behind you. He reached up to the box of cereal you were reaching for accidentally placing his hand on the small of your back. You felt a shiver move up your spine that you fought to ignore.

You smiled at him as he handed you that box. 

“Thank you Lieutenant.” You said before placing the box in the cart and began to walk away. 

“Call me Bradley!” He called after you.

You smiled to yourself as you continued to walk away from the pilot, he watched you in a trance as you disappeared into another aisle. He began to walk in the opposite direction when a sudden realization hit him. 

“Ma’am wait!” You heard a voice calling after you and saw Bradley chasing after you, stopping your cart with curiosity. 

“How did you know I’m a Lieutenant?” He asked.

“I used to work at the Hard Deck, had the pleasure of witnessing one of your world famous performances.” You replied with a slight chuckle. 

He furrowed his eyebrows at your response. You worked at the Hard Deck? Bradley wracked his brain trying to place you in the bar. He kicked himself mentally for not seeing you before, because if he saw you then, you would have definitely caught his attention. 

“Well I’m sorry we missed each other.” He said with a half smile.

“And I’m sure we’ll see each other again, you and my husband have actually flown together, I think maybe a year ago.” 

“And please stop calling ma’am, it makes me feel old. The names (y/n).” You remarked as you finally left the aisles to pay at a register. 

He flew with her husband a year ago? Bradley tried to think of a mission he flew a year ago. The only special detachment he could think of was the uranium plant, the mission that finally brought him and his estranged godfather back together.

He thought of the people he flew with, it couldn’t be Fritz, Omaha, Yale, or those other guys, yes they were part of the assignment with him but they didn’t exactly fly with one another for too long. There’s obviously no way it was Phoenix. He already knew Fanboy’s girlfriend and Payback refused to be tied down. It could be Bob, he was very good at keeping secrets considering he’s a WSO and one of the best ones at that. But something told him that it wasn’t Bob. And Rooster could not see Coyote with a wife let alone a kid. Which left only one other person. 

“(Y/n) Seresin” He muttered to himself.

Of course! He remembered Jake bragging about how he tied down the knockout that was the former Hard Deck bartender. Jake might’ve been a cocky son of bitch but he did not at all exaggerate. 

By some work of the universe, you and Bradley became fast friends. He became your official human grabber stick. He would help you reach the things that were too high up on the grocery shelves and you taught him how nutrition for adults worked. You couldn't believe that you had to explain to a grown man (more importantly, a navy man) that you could not live off just pizza and beer. 

It was nice to have a friend, you didn’t have too many of those as working at a law firm and having a baby took up most of your time. He made you laugh after a particularly bad day and he was an awesome babysitter. You smile as you remembered how Astrid referred to Bradley as Uncle Roo Roo when her verbal skills weren’t yet developed, and he called her his “Little Chick”. 

You grabbed weekly lunches, had movie nights with Astrid, you helped him with advice with whatever girl he was seeing on any given month, and he comforted you whenever Jake flaked on coming home, which was increasingly becoming more often than not. 

“Roo, is it me?” You asked your friend as you wiped away the tears.

“Is that why he refuses to come home? Does he hate me that much?” You fought the tears that threatened to leave your eyes.

“Don’t say that (y/n), Hangman has his reasons but hating you is not at all on that list.” He replied, as he handed you another tissue.

“This is the third time in a row that he promised he’d be home and then gets shipped off, there’s a difference between being career driven and being a slave to your job!” You sobbed.

Bradley wished he could provide a reason why Hangman thought it was a good idea to leave his wife and child for months and months at a time. He understood the call of duty. He himself had been called to missions at inconvenient times. But he at least said no when they were too close to each other. He could not at all understand Seresin’s reasoning.

“And it’s not like it’s just about me. Does he forget we have Astrid? She is almost 3, she’s already starting to notice him not being around.”  You admit as you twirl a piece of hair around your finger.

“She was looking forward to seeing him, Roos, how am I going to tell a 3 year old girl that her daddy is not coming home?” 

Bradley’s heart broke for both of you.

“How about this? You and the Little Chick get changed and I’ll take you both for ice cream?”  Bradley proposed as he pulled himself off the floor of your living room where you were both situated.

“You can have as much chocolate syrup and toppings as you want.” He added with a smile as he offered a hand to help you up.

“On top of mango ice cream with extra maraschino cherries?” You inquired as you accepted his hand.

“Anything you want Darlin’” He smiled.

You knew Bradley wasn’t the biggest fan of sweets, preferring a bag of chips over a bag of candy. With ice cream being at the very bottom of his list of preferred treats. 

But he knew how much you and Astrid loved ice cream, especially when you’re sad.

“Okay, I’ll get Astrid ready.” You smiled.

The three of you went to get ice cream. Astrid getting a double scoop of chocolate with lots of Jimmie’s, and you getting a cup of mango ice cream with the chocolate syrup and huge pile of cherries as Rooster promised. 

Rooster claimed he didn’t want any but continuously stole spoons of ice cream from both you and Astrid.

You were surprised that Astrid allowed this because she normally never shared food.

“How come you share with Uncle Roo Roo but not Mommy?” You asked your daughter teasingly with your hands on your hips.

“Because Uncle Roo Roo promised to fly me on a plane!” She explained through her grin.

“And…???“ Bradley added.

Astrid gave an exaggerated sigh.

“Annndddd he’s the coolest uncle in the world.” She admitted defeatedly.

Bradley fist pumped into the air as he pulled Astrid into his lap and tickled her neck.

“That’s right Little Chick! And that earned you a trip to the carnival!” He exclaimed in between Astrid’s little giggles. 

You three spent a few hours at the carnival, with Astrid having her fill of cotton candy, and having her face painted as Yoshi.

“I don't wanna be a butterfly! I wanna be Yoshi! Yoshi is cooler!” Your toddler screamed at the poor teenage face painter, you offered her an apologetic smile as Bradley appeared to be amused. He made sure to tip her extra for her flexibility. 

Bradley managed to win at every game stall that you encountered. Astrid was thrilled at the amount of prizes that Uncle Roo Roo was winning for her. 

“Mommy! Look at all my new friends!” She exclaimed as she showed off the prizes, struggling to hold them up.

“Okay that’s enough prizes.” You laughed.

“One more teddy bear and you’ll fall over sweetheart”

“Awwww finneee.” Your toddler sighed as she continued to walk in front of you and Bradley.

“I have one last prize.” Bradley told you with a small smile.

“Roo, I said no more, Astrid has enough to last a lifetime.” 

“This prize is actually for you Darlin’.” He said softly as he handed you a stuffed small tiger. You furrowed your brows in confusion.

“Tony the Tiger,” He explained.

“Like the mascot from Frosted Flakes?” You asked Rooster with an amused smile on your face.

“Yeah.. it was the cereal box I handed you when I met you and Little Chick for the first time.” 

You felt a soft warmth in your chest upon his admission. 

“Thank you Roo, I love it.” You looked at him with a small smile, you noticed the golden flecks Bradley had in his eyes for the first time. 

“Ferris Wheel!” An enthusiastic voice interrupted your moment.

“Uncle Roo Roo, Mommy, Can we PLEASE ride it?!” 

“Sure Little Chick, as long as your Mommy says yes” Bradley told your daughter with a small chuckle.

Your 3 year old gave you puppy dog eyes.

“Alright fine, but this is the LAST ride, okay sweetheart?” You told Astrid sternly.

She nodded excitedly as she pulled you and Bradley towards the ride.

“Woah, we’re so high up! It’s so pretty.” Astrid said in wonder.

“Well get used to it Little Chick, because when you’re up in a plane with me it’ll be even higher and even prettier!” Bradley told her.

You were grateful for Bradley and how much he helped your little family. You loved to see how well your best friend treated your daughter, and how much he clearly loved and cared about her. 

But you couldn’t help but feel a pang in your heart. These were moments your daughter was supposed to have with her father. Jake should be the one buying her ice cream, winning her stuffed animals, and taking her on plane rides. You cursed Jake for being gone, but you couldn’t bring yourself to stay angry at him because despite all of the bullshit, you still loved him and wanted him to succeed. 

Bradley noticed the sadness settling on your face.

“Hey, let’s take a picture.” He said and took you out of your thoughts.

The three of you sat together on the bench of one side of your Ferris Wheel car. You gave your best smile as Bradley snapped a picture. Rooster was on your side with his show dazzling smile, and Astrid on your other side smiling wide despite missing a few teeth. It instantly became one of your favorite memories. 

When you finally got home that night, Bradley helped you carry an exhausted 3 year old into her bed. 

You walked downstairs with him to see him out. 

“Bradley.” You whispered. This caught his attention because you hardly use his first name. He looked at you.

“(y/n)” He replied.

“Thank you for today, you really made Astrid happy.” You told him appreciatively.

“Of course, I would do anything for the Little Chick.” He replied with a smile “And I hope I also made you happy.” He added.

“You did.” You said with a soft smile. “You’re going to make some lucky girl very happy one day, Bradley”. 

You saw something flash in his eyes, but couldn’t figure out what it was before Rooster placed his Ray Band on his eyes.

“Goodnight, (y/n)” He whispered, as he walked out the front door.

You went back upstairs to get Astrid ready for bed. After washing off her face, and changing her into her princess pajamas, you finally began to tuck her in.

“Why didn’t Daddy come home today Mommy?” Your toddler asked, looking up at you with her big eyes. 

You dreaded having this conversation. You took a breath before beginning to explain. But she beat you to it.

“He had to go away for a special mission again didn’t he?” Your daughter surprised you with her question. You gave her a small nod, ready to leave the room and begin your own night routine. 

“Is Uncle Roo Roo going to be my new Daddy?” Your breath gets caught in your throat at her question. 

“What makes you say that sweetheart?” You asked her nervously.

“Because he plays with me and tickles me and buys me toys and ice cream like a daddy does.” Astrid explained.

“Sweetheart, your Daddy will always be your Daddy, Uncle Roo Roo is Mommy’s best friend so he likes to help hang out and play with you.” You tell her praying that this answer would be enough for the toddler. 

She gives a small nod as she takes a big yawn. 

You finished tucking her in and turned to walk out the room. As you reached to flip off the light switch, your daughter asked you one last question. 

“Mommy, is Daddy your best friend too?” 

“Yes of course baby, why do you ask?” 

“Because Uncle Roo Roo looks at you the same way Daddy does.”

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