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itoldsunset · 3 years

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ipytm episode 3 thoughts (very very long), take it or leave it. i have a lot of asks in my inbox and honestly i'm overwhelmed (there are a lot of feelings about this episode that i'm not prepared to hold because i am processing my own) so i don't think i'll get to them, but here are my reactions after thinking about it for a bit.

i kind of wonder what my reaction to episode 3 would have been had i stayed off of social media all day yesterday. my mindset going into ipytm was, "i don't want a cheating plot, but if there is one, i trust nadao to handle it well" because they're responsible for some of the best writing i've ever seen in thai television. i still believe that. i wish they hadn't chosen the cheating plot because there are other relationship conflicts to explore that don't involve cheating, but for me it's not a dealbreaker.

i disagree with critiques saying they did it for ratings or sensationalism. if anything, they lost viewers from this. people are not okay with cheating plots, and the team most likely knew this when they wrote it. yet they took that gamble anyway, which makes me want to believe they have something they want to say, and i'm waiting until the series ends to give my final judgment on whether they succeeded in that message.

i watched the episode live and saw thai fans' live reactions on twitter, then i spent the morning checking everyone's reactions here on tumblr. as of right now, thai twitter has not stopped insulting the director, the writers, and the company. the backlash is harsher than anything i've seen from international fans (i'm leaving it at that so please don't ask me). pretty much everyone hated what happened this episode, which i understand. but i don't think it means that it was lazy writing or that teh was out of character. i definitely think there's a problem, though, if the majority of viewers are feeling alienated from the show, because it means something went wrong along the way with the storytelling.

it is totally possible and in character for teh to cheat on oh-aew, because you can love someone with your whole heart and still hurt them and betray them (to be clear, it's still not okay). and it is totally possible for teh to have done something as shitty as this and still grow up to be a decent person in the end. this is where the time jumps become an issue for me. we left episode two with teh crying because he was afraid of losing oh-aew, and then we land in his third year where he's seemingly indifferent to oh-aew. but we weren't part of that journey, and the storytelling didn't lead us there emotionally. all we see is oh-aew being a super dedicated partner who is trying to salvage their relationship, while teh is completely distant and seems to have given up altogether.

i get it, he's insecure about his career and the possibility that he might end up like khim, and jai is the last thing he has to latch on to his now-more-elusive dream of becoming an actor. he's barely thinking about oh-aew and he's incapable of being a good partner right now, especially since oh-aew's success and happiness in advertising probably makes teh doubt himself even more. he's so in his head he's not even himself anymore. he has completely lost who he is, which is why he seems so foreign to us here. the objective facts are all there, but the emotional connection to make me empathize with him isn't, which is why all the shitty things he did this episode--juxtaposed against all the wonderful things oh-aew did--make him come across as such an exceptionally terrible person. and the thing is i know he still loves oh-aew. in the sex scene, he still clearly loves oh-aew. sure it was initiated by a desire to improve his acting for jai, but during the sex and the morning after, the love and affection for oh-aew are still there. teh just doesn't recognize it because all he sees is oh-aew having left him for better (a new career track he's happy with and doing well in, a group of friends who understand and support him) while teh remains stuck in the same loop holding on to jai as his last hope, which is why he's giving jai his everything. none of that makes any of it okay, but it makes it make sense.

i wish they had spent more time developing this internal conflict so that we could see it better, because it was only after rewatching it a couple of times, sitting on it, and reading people's reactions that i could begin to understand where teh is at in this episode. and i know we like that itsay gave us a lot to analyze, but i think ipytm has tried to jam too much into too few episodes that it ends up leaving the audience with blanks to fill in, which is a bit more work than i want to do when i'm enjoying a series. i think teh and jai got too much screen time, and teh and oh-aew not enough. i think there's a lot of insider stuff about drama/comm arts that's taking up space, which might resonate with folks who come from that field but not the majority of the audience who don't speak that language. i think if they had given more time to exploring teh and oh-aew's relationship, we wouldn't be seeing as much of this backlash.

a cheating plot doesn't make it cheap drama. i would happily watch a series that tackles infidelity in relationships because it is a super real topic with lots to explore: how does a couple navigate the aftermath of infidelity? can they rebuild trust, and how? what are the consequences to the relationship? all of these are important things to address, but the topic deserves a lot more space than a five-episode series can deliver, especially when it's combined with teh and oh-aew's other conflicts related to career, ambition, and other coming of age struggles. so for me it's not the cheating plot that's the problem but more so the fact that i don't think there's enough time for them to do it justice.

all that said, i think there's a tension here between a creator's creative vision and audience expectations, and i think this is an example of the showmakers maybe going too far in their vision to the point of alienating the audience. itsay is a comfort show and teh is a comfort character for a lot of us, and it's justifiable that folks are upset at the turn he's taken in ipytm. i'm also disappointed that it seems like teh remains the main character in ipytm while oh-aew's role has been reduced, because i can tell pp's acting has really improved and i would have loved to see more of him on the screen. the cheating storyline also makes it a lot harder to root for teh and oh-aew, and that honestly hurts the audience and affects our relationship to the show, and is another consequence of the writers choosing to go in that direction.

for me personally, itsay was full of angst but it gave me joy to watch because i loved watching teh and oh-aew fall in love with each other and i was rooting for them to overcome their obstacles to be together. ipytm has proven a lot more stressful to watch, where it doesn't spark that same joy but a lot more anxiety about "what's next," which was definitely a choice in setting the mood of the sequel. the material just doesn't work with the audience's emotions in the same way, it almost works against us. there's not the same sense of comfort and nostalgia and romance, but a darker realism of coming of age, and i wouldn't blame people for dropping off for that because it's a legitimate shift and doesn't match everyone's tastes in terms of the media they want to consume. i think we can hate the choices that were made here because they don't speak to our demands as an audience, but i wouldn't say they did it for the drama or for the ratings.

#i promised you the moon #ipytm #itsay #i told sunset about you #bkpp the series #ipytm spoilers #textpost

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prettyyoungtragedy · 6 years

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“It’s Complicated” (3)

Request by @fandomsfor-days - Hey love! I don’t know if you’re requests are open but I was wondering if you could do a reader insert with either Bucky where the reader is just a normal person/ doesn’t know the avengers and is completely oblivious and always seems to find herself in trouble. (Like in the middle of Hydra business or alien business) and Bucky notices every time. At first he thinks she might be like a bad guy but soon realizes they just have bad luck. I’m sorry if this sucks. Love your writing!

Summary: You lead the most normal life on planet earth, completely oblivious to the world of Avenging that rages around you until you are suddenly thrust into it with the Winter Soldier and an unexpected photo, and now you are the center of a plot that you don’t even want to be a part of.

A/N: I was laughing at myself the whole time I wrote this, I don’t even know what was going through my brain lol. BUT I hope you guys laugh as much as I did with the ridiculousness of this fic! Drop me some feedback, I LOVE hearing what you guys think! good or bad! :D

Also If you want to be tagged, please send me an ASK, I usually miss the comments asking to be tagged! :) THANKS!

Characters: Avengers!Bucky Barnes x reader

Warnings: Swearing? and yeah

Falling is such a hard feeling to describe, its the rush of the air passed your face and the lurch of your heart, every nerve, muscle, fiber of your being all seizing up at once from the panic of loss of balance and gravity.

And as you tumbled out that window, that was just it. An indescribable feeling. Your eyes wide with terror when you felt Bucky Barnes shove you out that window. You plummeted, that was the correct word, towards the concrete only to be grabbed around the waist by a pair of strong arms.

Your screaming didn’t stop when he sets you down, The Falcon that is. You screamed and collapsed on all fours, feeling your knees and the palm of your hands scraped raw on the concrete beneath you, gasping for air and shaking violently from fright and mostly shock. An EMT rushes to your side,

“Ma’am, Ma’am are you okay?” He asks hurriedly, he looks at Sam for an explanation.

“She’s in shock.” Sam said, hoisting you up by your shoulders. You leaned against him, trying to steady your breathing. You look down at your bloodied palms, and your now ruined dress.

“Window, he fucking…” You gasped, “Shoved me out the mother fucking window.”

The EMT frowned at you, “Who did?” He asked.

“That fucking fuck avenger.” You gasped and Sam laughed,

“She’s just in shock from the fall.” He said to the EMT who nodded understandingly, “You’ll be fine darling.” Sam said to you, patting you on the back before he took off once more. There’s the sound of more bullets hitting metal and concrete and shouts. Glass is shattering somewhere behind you but you are somewhat paralyzed in place as teh EMT looks over you.

There's a flurry of people around you and you see Steve Rogers walking people out of the building, wielding his shield all self righteous and shit, quickly shoving yourself away from the EMT who was trying to attach a drip to your arm. You were about to head over to Steve and have some choice words with him when you were suddenly dizzy and fainted on the spot.

The rapid flashes of lightning lit up the city every few seconds as the torrential downpour continued. It had been two days since the Hydra attack on the Senate dinner, there were a few fatalities and casualties but the Avengers had managed to save the day once more with minimum damage inflicted.

Bucky sat on the couch in the darkness, enjoying the peace and quiet that the night brought but once again that was rudely interrupted by Steve who stormed into the living room, followed by Sam who was looking like he had just been reprimanded.

“Did you shove a civilian out the window, Bucky?” Steve half yelled at him.

Bucky looks up from the array of S.H.I.E.L.D files before him, with a frown on his face. “What?” He snaps irritably at Steve, it was almost one in the morning, why Steve and Sam were even awake was beyond him and they were ruining his peace while he tried to get some work done.

“Did you shove that photographer out the window at the Met?” Steve repeated and Bucky’s hardened gaze fell onto Sam who avoided his gaze.

“You snitch bitch!” Bucky exclaimed at Sam , getting up from his seat.

“It wasn’t me! I didn’t say anything! Someone got the whole thing on camera, its all over the news!” Sam shot back, throwing his hands in the air.

“Fuck Bucky!” Steve exclaimed, kicking a nearby chair sending it sprawling across the room. “You’re going to get into trouble one of these days! You’re so reckless!”

Bucky pulled a face at Steve, “Okay, chill out Dad.” he said sarcastically, gesturing at him with his metal arm, “She lived. I saved her life, but go off I guess”

“By throwing her out a window?” Steve said, “This footage was front and center on the fucking news!”

“I’m the Winter Soldier, I don’t know what you expected, I’m not a hero.” Bucky shrugged, and dropped back into his seat. A little cockily, he was rather proud of that moment and he’d seen the footage, it looked fucking cool.

Sam stifled a laugh beside Steve, He and Bucky had already spoken about how cool that moment was and how dope Sam looked swooping in and saving her life. Steve threw a look at Sam and then at Bucky,

“You are going to apologize to her.” Steve stated.

“Fuck, no. Steve don’t make me do that!” Bucky groaned,

“Yeah man, Bucky saved her life, he shouldn’t apologize.” Sam added,

“I don’t care, they can sue us. You’re sending her an letter of apology.” Steve retorted, then whirled around very dramatically and stormed off. “You two are nothing but trouble together!” Steve called out as he stormed away.

The moment Steve was out of sight, Sam was jumping around excitedly like a schoolgirl, and Bucky had a big grin on his face.

“That footage is so dope!” Sam said excitedly, fist bumping Bucky.

Bucky grinned at his friend, “I know right!” He said, just as excitedly pumping his fist in triumph at the moment.

The aftermath of what had happened at the Senate dinner was all over the news. Every channel covering the developing story about the terrorist organization Hydra. Will had gone out on a limb to make sure that WC got the first scoop on a lot of the stories and it had been a week now since the dinner.

You were seated in your office, leaning your head in the palm of one of your hands, it was your first day back since the dinner. You still had bandages on your arms, and had to get a few stitches here and there but you were kind of just glad you were alive. The nightmares were still occurring about you falling from that window, and you woke up almost every night screaming in fear from the memory of it.

There were flowers and get well soon cards all over the office, the smell of the different flowers coating the air with a sickly sweet smell and it irritated you. You needed to get out of this office. With a sigh, you grabbed your laptop and camera and headed for the door.

Just as you opened it, Kate the secretary stepped in front of you.

“Hi Y/N.” She said cheerfully, much to your annoyance. She held a large bouquet of red lilies in a crystal vase in her arms.

“Hey,” You replied and before you could excuse yourself she started talking again.

“These came for you, with this note.” She practically shoves the note and the flowers into your hands, and you almost dropped it but steadied it quickly.

“Kate, I’m on my way out.” You tried to say but for some reason she wasn’t listening to you. She started babbling on about how everyone was so worried about you and you were so missed around the office, and you sighed.

“Ok thank you Kate.” You eventually cut into her babbling and she stopped talking. You threw her a tight smile and then turned back into your office to set down the flowers. You were going to discard the card, but the emblem on the envelope made you pause.

It was that damned blue A, the Avengers insignia.

“Fuck me.” You sighed, and ripped open the envelope, pulling out the letter that was inside.

‘Dear Miss Y/L/N.

I James Buchanan Barnes, would like to formally apologize for the incident that took place at the Senate Dinner. It was mighty wrong of me to throw you out of the window even if it was to save your life. Please accept these flowers as my humblest apology and know that I am only here to protect and serve as an Avenger and a fine upstanding citizen of this great city of New York.

With all the regards in the world

A very sorry Winter Soldier’

“Well shit.” You muttered, “This smug son of a bitch.”

You looked at the flowers and then had a sudden spark of anger fly through you. You grabbed them out of the vase and threw them angrily into the trash. very dramatically stomping your foot into the trashcan as if to kill the flowers dead.

That fucking bastard Winter Soldier had practically traumatized you with his antics and now had the nerve to send you a bunch of flowers and a sarcastic apology note and think it was okay.

Grabbing a pen off the desk, and a piece of paper you scribbled out a quick message. Then put it in an envelope and titled it to James Buchanan Barnes. Placing it on Kate’s desk and asking her to send it to the Avengers Tower before the end of the day.

And then you escaped the office, out into the city, in an attempt to distract your mind from your work.

Bucky was in the gym working out, he was completely zoned out to his surroundings as he repeatedly slammed his fists into the sandbag before him. Its was a methodical movement, two to the left, one to the right. Then he would switch it up again and again and again.

He had been going at this for over an hour, his heart rate remaining steady. Fists drawn to his face, un-gloved, unprotected. He didn’t care, the contact to his skin made him feel alive. Sweat dripping down the sides of his face, matting his hair.

Everyone in the tower knew when Bucky was in the gym to stay the out of it. It was his haven, and he hated having his haven disturbed. There had been a few times when an unknowing intern had ventured into the gym, only to come face to face with a hulking angry super soldier and they would run out fearing for their lives.

So when one of the secretary’s walked into the gym, clutching the envelope that had been specifically ordered to be hand delivered to him, she was already nervous. Pausing briefly she was left speechless as she saw him. Bucky’s back was to her, his hulking figure was shirtless and dripping in sweat, the muscles in his back rippling as he moved his fists against the sandbag.

She stepped closer and he immediately stopped moving, slowly turning around to face her. And she almost squealed, he had a murderous look in his eyes when he cast his gaze over her.

“What do you want?” Bucky snapped at her.

“Uh..Uhh..” She stuttered, swallowing nervously. His eyes go to the letter she is clutching, his name clearly written on the title.

“I am assuming that is for me?” He said, holding out his metal arm for her to give him the letter.

The secretary nods rapidly, and her gaze goes to his ridiculously toned torso, the muscles in his abs are taut and defined. Little drops of sweat rolled over them and she was entirely too attracted to him. Who wouldn’t be, he looked like a greek god.

“So do you want to give me the letter or?” Bucky said raising his eyebrows at her, snapping her out of her staring.

“Oh sorry.” She squeaked and then quickly handed him the letter, blushing furiously before she turned and practically ran out of the gym.

Bucky chuckles and shakes his head, before he looks down at the envelope in his hands. Frowning he flips it over a few times, its just titled James Buchanan Barnes, no forwarding address nothing.

This makes him suspicious.

Tearing it open in one swift motion, he pulls out the folded piece of paper inside and unfolds it. His eyes scanning across the writing scribbled on it, once twice thrice. Before he burst out laughing.

The note read:

‘Mr James Buchanan Barnes, you must an an absolute cuntknuckle if you think sending me flowers and a fucking note is going to make up for the fact that you fucking threw me out of a window. I could have died, in fact my fucking soul left my body and I was fucking positive I was going to die. Fuck you and fuck your flowers, which by the way I threw in the fucking trash. Don’t contact me again, and I hope you fall off a building soon.

Fuck you, fuck your sarcastic letter of apology and fuck your metal arm that bruised my chest. You absolute fucking dickhead.

With absolutely the worst regards in the world, (Because I truly hope you are miserable)

Y/N Y/L/N’

Three days later

The rain had come again, it was late afternoon when the torrential downpour had arrived and you were sitting in a booth in a coffee shop near your apartment. Looking through the photos from the Senate dinner, you had to prepare them for the editors. you had headphones in and the music drifting through them drowned out the sounds around you. You were entirely engrossed in your work, that you didn’t notice him slip into the seat in front of you.

Bucky watches you for a moment with an amused smile, you hadn’t noticed him yet. So he reaches over and flicks one of your headphones. The motion scares the ever living crap out of you.

You are startled back to reality , and almost scream out “What the fuck.” When you see the Winter Soldier sitting before you. A few heads in the coffee shop turn towards you and you blush furiously. Bucky leans back in the seat, and smug smirk on his face.

“Well hello there.” He said.

“What the fuck!” You snapped irritably at him. Your heart was pounding in your chest from the fright you had just received and from the fact that well, the Winter Soldier was sitting before you. Someone who you had hoped to almost never see again.

“I need to talk to you.” Bucky said, that smug smirk still on his face.

“How the fuck did you find me?” You asked, looking around.

“Irrelevant.” He replied, “I need to speak to you.”

“No you don’t.” You retorted, gathering up your items. Violently shoving your laptop, phone and other items into your black leather tote. “Goodbye.”

Then you stood up and began to march out of the coffee shop and into the rain, behind you , you hear Bucky sigh and get up following you out of the coffee shop. How he had found you, or even knew where to look sort of freaked you out.

The rain almost immediately wets you and you shield your handbag by throwing your parka over it. Not wanting the contents to get wet. It was really stupid of you to go out in the rain like this but your apartment wasn’t very far and you wanted to get away from him.

“Come on, I just want to talk.” His voice is suddenly behind you.

“Go away man, I don’t even know you, fuck!” You snapped, and sped up your steps but he kept up with you easily. Of course he did, he was a fucking super soldier.

“Accept my apology and I’ll go away.” Bucky said, and you skidded to a halt, whirling to face him. Your sudden movement startling him slightly.

The rain was pouring over the two of you and you were entirely soaked at this point. “No, I don’t accept your apology, you pushed me out of a window. I have nightmares about it so you can fuck right off. Whatever guilty conscience you suddenly have, you can shove it up your ass because I don’t care.Goodbye Mr Barnes, and stay the fuck away from me.” You snapped, it was rather unnecessarily rude of you but you couldn’t help it. The fall from the window had really messed you up.

Bucky’s whole face changed when he heard you say you had nightmares from the fall, up until that moment he didn’t feel guilty for pushing you out the window. He was only here because Steve was forcing him to apologize in person when he saw the note you sent. But now he realized it had been a lot more traumatizing for you then he had intended.

He opens his mouth to say something but you had already begun to storm off through the rain. And he knew it was best to just let this one go, there was more to this than a simple apology. So standing in the rain, he watches as your figure hurriedly retreats away from him, and he can’t help the guilt that settles in his chest.

The force with which you slammed the door when you walked into your apartment, could have shaken it off its hinges. The bang echoed through your apartment, as you angrily went about wrenching off your wet clothes and stomping off your boots.

Who the fuck does he think he is, you thought angrily as you tossed your bag onto the counter, and headed half naked to the cupboard where you kept all the booze. Grabbing a glass from the shelf and the bottle of whisky, you angry stomped your way across your apartment and into your bedroom. Kicking the door shut behind you.

You took a quick shower to warm up before you settled in front of your laptop, and for some reason had taken to researching the Winter Soldier, fuck you hated the guy and all of those Avengers. They seemed like pompous assholes. But soon, you got lost in a maze of articles, and stories, and different websites with hundreds of photos of him.

There was one name that kept coming up synonymous with his name, Hydra. You were reading through an article about him, when the phrase caught your eye.

Hail Hydra.

You paused for a second and frowned, where had you seen that phrase before. Wracking your brain, you repeated it again and again to yourself hoping to jog your memory. You take a sip of whiskey from the glass in front of you, grimacing slightly as the brown liquor burns down your throat, you really should stop drinking this shit.

Then it hits you like a freight train, almost spitting out your mouthful of whiskey. You scrambled upright in your chair and frantically scrolled through your laptop. Opening the photos from the Senate dinner, you scrolled through them quickly. Until you reached the photos of Senator Stern and Jasper Sitwell.

You scrunched up your face at the images and enhanced them on your screen. Lipreading through pictures was no easy feat but you were a professional as you scrolled repeatedly between four images you had taken within seconds of each other.

Scrutinizing the images, you were positive they were saying Hail Hydra. “Fuck me.” You muttered as it dawned on you that they might be Hydra. This was so much bigger than you, but you were curious now and decided you needed to do a little more investigating of your own before you turned this information over to the authorities. After all, you could be wrong.

Across town, Bucky paced the length of his room at the tower. In his hand is a sleek black tablet, he is reading through the latest mission report. But your words are playing on his mind, he can’t help it. Your words hit home the second he heard nightmares, it was over for him. He was going to do anything to fix it, he had to. It became an obligation. Yeah he didn’t know you from two blue bars of soap, but there was still an intriguing sense about you.

“Yo, Buck.” Sam’s voice comes through the door as he knocks on it. “You want to go get food?”

Bucky tosses the tablet onto the bed and opens the door. “Yeah.” was all he said to Sam as he walked out of the room. Sam falling into step beside him.

“Whaddya wanna get?” Sam asked, as the pair got into one of the sleek black Mercedes that was in the massive basement garage of the tower.

“Pizza?” Bucky suggested.

Sam shook his head, “Nah, I had pizza for lunch.”

“Shawarmas?” Bucky said with a sigh. This was a conversation he and Sam had every single day, food.

“No Steve and Tony had shawarmas for lunch and it just put me off because Tony kept talking about yeast infections while we were eating.” Sam said pulling a face.

Bucky looked over at Sam in the passenger seat and pulled a face, “What, how the fuck do those two even...You know what nevermind.” He shook his head, “What about Tacos?” Bucky asked as hit the push to start button in the car and the engine purred to life.

“Yes. Tacos sounds like a plan.” Sam said with a satisfied nod.

The pair drive half way across Manhattan for tacos from their favorite place. Taking a seat in one of the dark pleather cushioned booths of the richly decorated Mexican restaurant, Bucky pulls his baseball cap lower, even though it’s almost dark out and the rain is still torrenting outside, he wears the cap. It’s sort of a precaution, or a natural habit now to hide his face. He wears all black as usual, black jeans, black tshirt, black hooded sweatshirt over that. Everything black, always. It was his color.

Sam on the other hand wears bright colors, light grey shirt, blue jeans and red sweater jacket. He’s always calm and cocky when they go out, he flirts with the waitress, signs autographs for kids who recognize him. They’re always scared of Bucky, throwing nervous glances at him as they wait for Sam to take a photo with him.

“Thanks sweetcheeks.” Sam said with a wink, grinning at the waitress as she placed two beers in front of him and Bucky. She flashed him a flirtatious grin and touched his shoulder before she walks away from the table, sashaying her hips as he stares after her.

Bucky chuckles, “You’re a fool.” He said, taking a sip of the crisp cold beer. It won’t have an effect on him but he still enjoys the taste of it.

Sam shrugs at Bucky’s comment with a grin, “You could have all the ladies too, if you just dropped the brooding bad boy act.”

“I get the ladies just fine the way I am.” Bucky said.

“Oh yeah, when was the last time you got laid.” Sam snorted.

“Couple weeks ago actually.” Bucky replied, coolly.

“Okay, she doesn’t count because I lined that up for you.” Sam laughed. Bucky laughed as well, he couldn’t help it, Sam was his wingman in a weird way. The two of them had become compatriots both in the Avengers team and in life. Sam walked him through life in 21st century, taught him how to pick up women in this decade and how to flirt, taught him movies and music. With Steve’s help of course, but it was simple and easy to hang out with Sam. He would almost consider him his brother in arms.

“Doesn’t matter, I still got laid.” Bucky said.

“Yeah yeah,” Sam chided, “How’s the investigation going?” He asked, as he draws a long draught from his drink.

“There are too many files to get through to come to any conclusions. Natalia has been data mining files with me but a lot of it has encryptions so it doubled our time on this case.” Bucky replied. “We have suspects but nothing conclusive yet.”

“How are you after the Senate situation?” Sam asked. He knew how Bucky dealt with his PTSD as much as he tried to hide it and pretend he was fine.

“Fine.” Was Bucky's short reply.

“And the situation with the girl you flung out of the window?” Sam laughed.

“It’s complicated.” Bucky sighed and rubbed his jaw tiredly.

“Steve still on your case about getting her forgiveness?” Sam asked.

“Yup, the righteous mother fucker.” Bucky grumbled.

Sam was about to answer when the waitress reappeared with their food. She places the plates piled with tacos in front of the two hulking men and asks them if they need anything else.

To which Sam responds no and she leaves them be.

You’re drunk, obviously you’re drunk. You had drank half the bottle of whiskey and then fell asleep on the couch. But that’s when the nightmares started again.

‘You’re free falling, plummeting to the ground. From higher up this time. No matter how hard you tried to scream you couldn’t get the words out. You’re flailing, hands reaching for something, anything to grab on to save yourself. You can see thr gorund rapidly approaching you as you free fall and then...you hit the ground’

Jolting awake from your dream, you gasp for air and clutch your chest in fright. you were shocked awake covered in a cold clammy sheen of sweat. It takes you a few moments to gather yourself in you slightly still drunk state.

It’s cold and wet outside when you pulled on your coat and boot and stepped out onto the hard concrete of the sidewalk. The fresh cold air hitting you, immediately waking you up, and calming your mind. Pulling the zipper of your sweatshirt up, you walk across the street to the nearby Irish pub

As you reach the door to the pub, you’re about to grab the handle and pull it open when it suddenly swings at your face. You weren't expecting the movement and the door hits your square in the side of the head. You dropped like a bag of bricks, completely dazed from the knock the hard wooden door had given you.

Your hand immediately goes to the side of your head, clutching it. You can feel the wetness from the blood there, already seeping through your fingers. “What the fuck.” you groaned, your vision swimming.

“Are you fucking shitting me!” A gruff voice groans as they crouched down over you, to see if you were okay and you look up at the assumed person who hit you in the head with the door.

It is none other than, James Buchanan Barnes, the fucking Winter Soldier. And of course next to him is is pal, Sam Wilson, the Falcon.

Fucking Avengers, you thought as your gaze fell over them.

“Here, let me help you.” Bucky said, moving his hand towards the now open gash on your head. How hard had he fucking pushed the door open, he wondered.

“Ugh, don’t fucking touch me.” You snapped, shoving his hand away from you. He draws it back with a sigh and looks at Sam.

“Miss, can we just have a look to see if you need stitches or not?” Sam said in a kind voice, he switched places with Bucky and now knelt over you. Sam gave you a kind smile and you sighed deeply, still dazed you moved your hand away from the cut on your head and he looked at it.

“You’re fine,it’s just a little head wound.” Sam smiled at you. “Do you live close by? Or do you want us to take you to the hospital?” He asked,

“I live close by and I am sure as shit not going anywhere with you two.” You replied, and then slowly got up.

“You could have a concussion.” Bucky said. He moves his hand towards you as dizzily stumbled backwards once you were on your feet.

Swatting his hand away once more, you give them both an angry look and the proceeded to storm away from them, across the street and back towards your apartment. Sam and Bucky give each other a look and then start after you.

“Ma’am, wait” Bucky starts to say but you whirled around angrily, making yourself dizzy again and almost falling into his arms, you gripped his forearm for a moment as your equilibrium balances

“Don’t call me ma’am and oh my god, stop following me!” You exclaimed, shoving him away. Bucky fumbles with your arms as he tries to steady you. And Sam sniggers beside him at the sight of you shoving the super soldier away and him fumbling like a dumbass trying to help you but also not touch you.

Bucky sighs deeply, becoming increasingly annoyed with you, and he looks at Sam who just shrugs and raises his hands in surrender. “All you man.” He said, with a slight laugh.

Placing your hand on your head again, you walked away from the two men and back towards your apartment. There was a throbbing in your skull now, you knew you had taken quite a knock to the head and it was probably best to get it checked out but you wanted to get away from those two. They just smelled like trouble, and you were always having near death experiences around them.

Bucky and Sam watch as you disappear into the apartment building which they assume is where you live.

“I think it’s a real coincidence that we keep bumping into her.” Bucky mused, still looking at the building. The two of them stood shoulder to shoulder, on the sidewalk.

“I think it’s real funny that you almost broke her head with a door.” Sam laughed.

Bucky threw him a look, and shoved him lightly. “Come on, let’s go.” He said, and begins to walk away “And you better not fucking say a word of this to Steve.” He added for good measure, this just made Sam laugh.

Bucky noted the building and street name that you lived on, just for in case and future reference. He didn’t know why he did it, he just deemed it necessary in his assassin brain.

There was something about you that he couldn’t quite place his finger on it and it was starting to bug him. He had to dig deeper into your past or just your life. It sounded a little obsessive stalkerish in his mind but oh well, he didn’t care.

Bucky had an itch in the form of you and he needed to scratch it.

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