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0h0possum · 2 months

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A Codywan and How to Train Your Dragon crossover that turned into a the Mandalorians factions are dragons AU, because I can never just do something simple and for the heck of it.

If you’re not interested the AU lore, leave now or suffer my rambling lol.

Basically, the idea is that Mandalorians started as a race that could shift into dragons. The Mand’alor line and those of most influence were notably ‘Fury’s (for example Mand’alor Tarre Viszla was a Nightfury and so is his generational line). But over time most Mandolorians who could shift were killed off or just lost the ability as more non-shifter Mandolorians married in. Eventually only a few of the Fury’s were around, and when Mandalore split most chose factions lead by the remaining Fury lines. AKA: the New Mandalorians/Lightfury’s, the Haat Mando'ade or True Mandalorians/Duskfury’s, and the Kyr’tsad or Death Watch/Nightfury’s.

Basically this also helps explain (in my head) why Mandalorians would follow Death Watch (terrorists) or the New Mandalorians (Intense Pacifist). It’s because they see those lines that can still shift as chosen leaders or a physical embodiment of the Ka’ra’s will.

How is Obi-Wan a shifter though? Well in this AU he’s the son of Tor Viszla. Long story short, early on when Obi-Wan was born he displayed being force sensitive, and Obi-WAN’s mom (Tor’s wife??? Idk it’s not important to the story) basically went ‘Aw hell naw’ and tried to drown Obi-Wan. Only to be stopped by a traveling Jedi who stole Obi-Wan and saved him. Totally unaware that this baby was Mandalorian, the son one of the biggest Mandalorian factions, AND also one of the last few existing Mandalorian dragon shifters. (Also Obi-Wan’s mom doesn’t want to admit that she lost Obi-Wan to a Jedi and just tells Tor that he was force sensitive and she succeeded in drowning him).

Maybe I’ll get into it later but basically Obi-Wan grows up as normal in the Temple, but obviously at some point he shifts and has the biggest panic of his life. But with help from friends (Quinlan, Garen, Siri, and Bant) he figures out shifting (enough to control it) and helps keep it a secret (Mandalorians and Jedi still don’t have best relations and Obi-Wan is paranoid about being kicked out of the Order anyways *cough cough Brandomeer cough cough Melinda/Daan*). To be clear, Obi-Wan isn’t like ashamed of what he is. He just doesn’t want the judgments of coming from CLEAR Mandalorian roots, and Death Watch at that. Plus he kinda just decides to not think about how he’s pretty much definitely related to well known terrorist Tar and Pre Viszla, because then he doesn’t have to address it. Besides he’s happy as a Jedi.

Anyways, NOW CODY-

So without getting to detailed (mission failed lol) all the clones ARE shifters (Duskfury’s just like Jango Fett), but they have it suppressed by the Kaminoans (probably part of their chips? I haven’t thought it fully out yet). BUT THINGS HAPPEN, probably Cody and Obi-Wan get stranded alone somewhere for a long time and Cody gets his chipped fucked up somehow, and now he’s shifting into a dragon???? And scaring the shit out of both him and Obi-Wan. But Obi-Wan exposes himself as a dragon shifter as well to comfort Cody and show that he will keep his secret. Plus he clearly understands him. (At this point they both are under the impression the clones aren’t shifters, and think Cody is just an outlier and “late bloomer” so to speak). Cue them learning how to be dragons together and be comfortable in their other form.

And eventually they get rescued and find out somehow all the clones are shifters, and therefore find the chips and discover Palpatine’s plan, SO THE GALAXY IS SAVED!

(Additionally the clones get rights and go to form their own society/group (Obi-Wan comes with to be with other dragons, but mostly to be with Cody), and they form an alliance with the New Mandalorians and accidentally unit Mandalore purely by the three Fury types (Nightfury/Obi-Wan, Duskfury/Cody, Lightfury/Satine) being around each other lol.

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aoi-kanna · 6 months

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ok, another one of these, because I have opened a can of worms and I have no self-control>w< #royaul +au but it's Dude & Bruh (& Bloodmoon) daily live

I'm looking at you @magyzuki, you kicked the can down the road to me 〜⁠(⁠꒪⁠꒳⁠꒪⁠)⁠〜

Dude&Bruh human versions of Cross & Epic (by jakei & yugo ) in Royal au (by Esino)

#aoi-kanna #my art #undertale au #random stuff #xtale fanart #epictale #royalty au #self indulgence time #I know my style makes them look too young but these mfs are like 30 and still dumb lmao.#tw crazy horses #tw blood

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vanilla60icecream · 26 days

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The old man and his nephew watching something

#leona kingscholar #twst leona #cheka kingscholar #twst cheka #uncle and nephew moments #twst #twisted wonderland #twst fanart #dumb shit #random stuff #my art

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thetarttfuldickhead · 9 months

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Roy wakes, fully hard and – two seconds later, when the details of the dream return to him – fully panicked.

Fuck.

---

It’s not like he’s never had sex dreams before. Come on. But none of them had featured men (except that weird one about Lee Pace in a banana costume and that hadn’t left him so much turned on as thoroughly confused) and abso-fucking-lutely not a single one of them had starred Jamie Tartt.

Jamie Tartt, who is now standing right in front of him in the dressing room, saying something about football something something, right Coach, something free kicks, and all Roy can think about is how he now has a very vivid idea of what those lips would look like when wrapped around his cock.

Jamie pushes a strand of hair of out of his eyes. They look grey now; in Roy’s dream they were green-tinting-towards-brown and heavy-lidded with lust as Roy had pushed him back on the bed—

Roy can’t stand it. Except one very specific part of him apparently can and no, no, fuck no, he’s not doing this. Without a word he turns on his heel and walks away, ignoring Jamie’s surprised objection.

Fuck.

---

Training is a nightmare.

The only way Roy can get through it at all is by not sparing Jamie a single glance. (Jamie running, dribbling, shooting; Jamie turning and twisting, as graceful as water; Jamie with hair damp with sweat and calling out to the others with that eager voice that had called out Roy’s name last night.) It’s really fucking difficult, though, because he’s used to always keeping at least half an eye on Jamie these days, no matter what else is going on. Besides, the prick’s everywhere, rushing around the pitch like the fucking Duracell Bunny on speed. Roy clearly made a huge mistake ever pushing him towards the heights of endurance because the little shit just. won’t. stop.

Roy’s attempts at avoidance don’t go unnoticed, either. He can feel the eyes of Beard and Nate on him; can see the way the other players look from him to Jamie and mutter among themselves.

He makes them run suicides until they collapse just to shut them up and when Jamie is the only one still on his feet Roy tells Beard that oh fuck, he has a really important meeting he needs to go to right now, he fucking forgot about it and now he’s running late, could Beard and Nate finish this up please, and of course Roy doesn’t flee from the pitch because Roy Kent doesn’t fucking flee from anything. He walks off rather hurriedly, sure, but that’s just to properly sell the lie of the meeting he’s in a rush to.

“Yeah, something is definitively up with him and Jamie,” he hears Beard mutter to Nate as he walks off.

Fuck.

---

He withdraws to the supply cupboard where he’s not likely to be disturbed, or found. He’s not hiding, obviously; he just needs a few moments to himself, to gather his wits. He’d drive home, except he actually does have a meeting with Rebecca in a couple of hours, and she is the one person he daren’t piss off. Not because she’s terrifying – although she can be, a fact that Roy respects immensely – but because she’ll know that something is off if he doesn’t show and unlike everyone else she has both the guts and the capacity to force it out of him.

In a farcical turn of events, which he entirely blames on Dr. Sharon (and maybe also on Keeley and Jamie a little, for their absurd and sometimes infectious tendency towards emotional honesty), Roy thinks that maybe he wouldn’t mind talking to someone about this. Maybe it would… help? Give him some perspective on things?

Problems is, there’s no one he can talk to, is there? Jamie is right out, for obvious reasons, and while this would probably be right up the Diamond Dogs’ alley, there’s no fucking way Roy is telling his fellow coaches and the club’s director of football operations about having a wet dream about the team’s star player. Apart from the utter mortification of it, it’s hardly fair on Jamie, having almost all his bosses discuss him like that. Even if it’s not the real Jamie they’d be discussing, really, just the very bendable and delightfully masochistic Jamie that’s taken shameless residence in Roy’s battered mind.

He can’t talk to Rebecca, for the same reason, even though he’s pretty sure she’d be able to say something clever enough and cutting enough that he’d snap right out of whatever the hell this is. Maybe she’d declare him clinically insane and unfit for duty and have him carted off to an asylum or some shit, and as much as that would suck it’d be a bit of a relief, honestly. At least he wouldn’t near twist his neck off his shoulders trying to avoid looking at Jamie.

Jamie would probably come and visit him, the fucking arsehole.

And Roy can’t talk to Keeley, either, because even though she’s probably the best person to bring this to and the person he’d most like to talk to, she’s been clear about having no interest in sorting Roy and Jamie’s shit out for them. Besides, he doesn’t want to somehow give her the idea that he’s over her. He’s not. He had a pretty wild dream about her just the other week, and—

For a brief moment, he’s assailed by the image of Keeley and Jamie tangled on Roy’s mattress, looking up at him with twin smiles and—

In spite of the cupboard being rather chilly, Roy starts to sweat. Desperately, he crosses his legs and forces his mind back to the time when he took a chug of orange juice only for it to be egg yolk and he nearly threw up.

It doesn’t really help. He’s still turned on, only now he’s feeling sick too.

He could talk to Dr. Sharon, he guesses, but Dr. Sharon is travelling southern France for the rest of the week.

Roy won’t last that long.

Fuck.

---

The door to the cupboard is pulled open with enough force to almost startle Roy off of the bucket he’s sat on.

“All right, what the fuck’s going on, man?” Jamie demands, without even having the decency to look surprised at finding Roy hiding hanging out among the mops and micro fibre cloths. “Did you hit your head and forget the last two years or something?”

“Of course not,” Roy mutters, determinedly not looking up from the computer precariously balanced on his lap.

“Then why the fuck are you ignoring me? The lads all think I did something really bad!” There’s a plaintive note in Jamie’s voice, reminding Roy of the noises dream-Jamie had made when Roy—

Roy closes his eyes. He can’t go on like this. He’s pretty sure that if he could just get a day or two – three or four tops, absolutely no more than five – away from Jamie, away from these constant reminders, the details of the dream would fade away, and his desire with it – but they have a game the day after tomorrow, so that’s not going to happen, and he can’t keep avoiding Jamie until then. It’d be bad for the team – not to mention that he can’t really stomach the hurt he hears in Jamie’s voice.

Nothing for it, then. Fuck it all to hell.

“I had a sex dream,” he grits out, carefully looking to the doorframe right next to Jamie’s face, so that he can catch Jamie’s reactions without having to look him in the eye.

Jamie doesn’t react much, just cocks his head to the side. “You had a sex dream about me?”

“Did I say it was about you, you muppet?!” Conceited prick.

“Uh, no, but it was? You wouldn’t be all weird about it if wasn’t.” Trust Jamie to always choose the worst moments to be insightful and reasonable. He’s doing it just to be contrary, Roy’s sure of it.

Jamie’s watching him expectantly, as if believing Roy will elaborate or explain further. Roy doesn’t say a word. Roy is busy stonily inspecting a small speck of dirt on the wall next to Jamie’s face.

Eventually, Jamie lets out a long sigh and rolls his eyes. “Fine. What’s the big deal then?”

Now Roy’s eyes snap to Jamie’s face, because what the hell? “What do you mean, what’s the big deal? You don’t think it’s a little weird and really fucking uncomfortable that I, Roy Kent, had a sex dream about you, Jamie Tartt? I’m your fucking coach! We’re friends!”

Jamie makes a face, like Roy’s being the insane one. “Roy, mate, you’ve seen the wall in my old bedroom. Bunch of half-naked girls and you, right? You never did the math on that?”

Roy has, in fact, never done the math on that. Hasn’t realize there as math to do. “You were impressed by my prowess as a football player,” he tries feebly.

Jamie rolls his eyes. “Um, yeah. Which is hot.”

“… oh.”

Roy doesn’t know what else to say to that. Doesn’t know how to feel about that. Hasn’t the faintest idea about how to even begin to process it.

Jamie is watching him with a small frown. He looks concerned, pitying almost, which makes Roy want to go throw himself in the Thames more than anything else in this discussion has.

“So,” Jamie says eventually, speaking slowly, like he’s trying very hard to find the right words, “all these years and you never once figured that this whole thing we’ve got going, all this fucking tension, that it was… you know… just a little bit sexual?”

“No.”

“What, never?”

“No.”

“That’s fucking mental, man.” Jamie looks like he doesn’t know whether to be incredulous or impressed. Then his eyes widen. “Ooh, is this because men getting with other men was illegal when you were a kid back in the dark ages? They burned people alive and shit, so you’re, like, repressed and stuff?”

Roy is about to bite his head off for pulling out fucking stupid ha ha you’re so old jokes now, except there’s something in Jamie’s eyes giving him the distinct impression that maybe Jamie is deliberatedly being a prick, doing it for Roy’s sake, trying to offer him a sense of normalcy or something, and that’s actually quite sweet, isn’t it? Only that thought has Roy’s heart doing something weird and stupid, so actually no, back to Jamie just being a prick.

“We’re in love with Keeley,” he says, and he means for it to be gruff, but it comes out pleading more than anything else.

“Yeah, I know.” Jamie sounds exasperated. “None of this means we ain’t. Fucking hell, mate, tension’s just tension, yeah, no need to fucking act on it if you don’t want to. And dreams are just dreams. I’m mad fit, you see me running around doing impressive shit all day, course you’re gonna dream about me, be weirder if you didn’t. Bet half the team do the same, anyway. It doesn’t have to mean anything.” Jamie crosses his arms, and looks as serious and decisive as Jamie ever does. “Listen, Coach, we’re playing West Ham this Saturday, and you need to stop being weird about this and start coaching me and not freak everyone out.”

Roy doesn’t ask him what Jamie think he’s been trying to do all day. Not his fault Jamie’s been right there, all pretty eyes and strong thighs and distracting lips and shit. But he doesn’t say that; instead, he sighs, because Jamie, infuriatingly, has a point. “Yeah. Okay. But… just give me a fucking minute. Go get changed and I’ll be there in fifteen, all professional and shit.”

“Great. See you then, Coach.”

Jamie turns and as he walks away Roy can’t help his gaze sliding down to Jamie’s arse, noticing the way the blue shorts cling to the round buttocks, leaving little enough to the imagination, only Roy is imagining what they’d look like sans shorts and red from Roy’s fingers and palm, wondering if the reality would match the dream.

Fuck.

---

Dreams are just dreams. Roy tells Dr. Sharon as much during their next appointment, because even though talking to Jamie helped him pull himself together just enough to muddle through the rest of the week with his sanity mostly intact, he’s still feeling rather rattled by the whole mess. Untethered.

Jamie’s been brilliant, carrying on as if nothing’s changed between them. Somehow, that hasn’t helped as much as Roy would’ve thought it would.

Dr. Sharon listens carefully and without judgement, as she always does. “You’ve had dreams before,” she notes once Roy’s fallen silent. “I’m sure some of them have been strange or unsettling. Has any of them ever affected you like this?”

“No. Like I said, it’s just dreams, right? It’s not real. Shouldn’t affect me. Never fucking does, not even the sexy ones, usually.”

“Right. So why do you think this one was different?”

Roy stares at her. She returns his stare calmly, patiently. Waits, watching him, until he can’t help but catch the shape of it reflected back at him in her kind eyes.

Fuck.

---

“What if I don’t want it to be just a dream?”

“Eh?”

Jamie’s peering at him through the open door, looking like he’s wondering what Roy is doing showing up unannounced and spouting nonsense on his doorstep at half past three on a rest day.

Which, okay, fair enough.

“What if I don’t want it to be just a dream?” Roy repeats, a little slower this time.

For another moment, Jamie just stares at him. Then his eyes widen, lightening up with delight. “Oh! You mean… ?” He gestures between them.

“Yeah,” Roy says and then he’s being pulled into the hallway by his jacket and he has time to think that that they really need to figure out how Keeley fits into all of this and then he has his arms around a body that is firm and solid and there and Jamie Tartt is kissing him and it’s not a dream at all.

Fuck. Oh, fuck… !

#i don’t know. it’s stupid. it’s dumb. here #have an entirely random bisexual awakening ficlet that came to me in my not-yet-sober stupor this morning #why is roy so silly in this you may ask #well have you seen 3x12?#why is roy so silly in that hmmm?#also it's crack #but a little bit it isn’t you know?#special thanks to everyone helping me settle on ‘supply cupboard’#nothing else in this ficlet has been brit-picked bc why start being consistent now?#roy kent #jamie tartt #royjamie #royjamiekeeley #although the royjamiekeeley bit is mostly future #ted lasso #ficlet #my stuff #post-canon

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sneeb-canons · 2 months

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mind has a rigorous sleep schedule both because he loves routine and needs to be the only one who cares about himself, but mostly because any amount of sleep deprivation has him saying the stupidest shit and then heart and soul clown on him forever and ever and ever abt it

Headcanon #410

#chonny jash #submission #cj mind #chonnys charming chaos compendium #mind saying stupid/goofy stuff is my favorite thing #let mind be the dumb random thoughts at 4am

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nursemimosa · 3 months

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I have something ultra cool and special to share today!

These are the Nov. 2023 and Feb. 2024 issues of Nintendo Dream that, upon me seeing them, resulted in me dropping everything I had to buy them instantly 😅

Both of these focus on the SV DLC, with the second issue pictured above containing some exclusive goodies (a full Jan 2024-Jan 2025 calendar!! and a double sided poster). I'll do a little in depth dive about these below the jump and include some pictures. (also forgive me for the quality of the pictures, I'm just a lil fella with an almost four year old phone...)

The November 2023 issue provides some info about the Teal Mask and things that were to come from the Indigo Disk. Having completed both now, it is really nice to relish in these pictures, trying to imagine what it would have been like to still be waiting in anticipation for the second part!

The February 2024 issue goes a little more in depth about what there is to do in the Indigo Disk, with a (curious, to me) focus on both of the Elite Fours from S/V. I really like this issue a lot more since there are more pages dedicated to the game than the previous one (and not my Paldea Elite Four bias, I swear).

My most favorite things were the included goodies found in the February issue. There was a (giant!) double sided poster and a full year calendar!

The poster on one side contains the promotional art for the Indigo Disk. The second side displays the Paldea Elite Four (my favorite side. As someone who's most favorite characters happen to be the Academy Staff and the Paldea Elite Four, I feel like I happened to stumble upon a holy grail (｡T ω T｡) if only they'd give the academy staff more merch and actual official art though..)

The calendar is small but is packed with cute little tidbits and info about the game. They managed to assign every single day a Pokemon in the S/V dex (my birthday was assigned grafaiai... in case you were wondering).

Even though I wish the magazines kinda focused more on SV (especially the Nov. issue), I'm super elated to have these in my collection :> they're really precious and so bold. The goodies are especially something I will always hold onto.

I'll end the post with a lil' Kieran! have a good one!

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shikai-the-storyteller · 9 months

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There are SO many cool interactions and lore things we can look forward to now that Rubius says he'll come back to QSMP (not only as an angel / demon, but potentially as a human too!), but that little detail reminded me of something:

Even though q!Vegetta and q!Rubius were mutually interested in each other wayyyy back in the beginning of the series, as an Angel / Demon, Rubius said he can't have relationships with humans because it's against the rules.

But a bit ago on stream, Rubius said that he's thinking about having a "human" side so he can build and do more things on the server as a regular player. I'm excited because this means he can have more casual interactions with people and we can see him interacting with his friends more (and he can experience The Horrors), but also...

I think we're in for some very interesting drama in the next few weeks.*

* ( Assuming Rubius doesn't get harassed off the server by toxic shippers and weird fans of the Eggs again. Please be nice to Rubius and welcome him back kindly, he's a very cool guy and his character is SO interesting )

#Full disclosure: shipping stuff always comes second (or dead last) to fun random interactions and dumb bits between friends #I'm more excited about Rubius coming back PERIOD #but u know. the potential for some Rubegetta crumbs or full-course meals is a fun little bonus for yours truly #i talk #qsmp talk #Anyways like I said #god forbid I see anyone being freaks about Rubius again because it'll be ON SIGHT #''But FooIi//getta is-'' I Simply Do Not Care #I don't care about fictional ships I want Rubius to interact with his friends on the server without fans being freaks about it #(I'd like to reiterate I have nothing against that ship I'm just very tired of seeing people being weird to Rubius because of it)#(because they think he ''gets in the way'' or whatever)#I will say that's one massive advantage Karmaland had over QSMP #characters could flirt or make out or bang or whatever and fans would just laugh it off because It Wasn't That Deep (usually)#I think a lot of the younger fans (...and many English fans...) need to adopt this mindset #I'm looking forward to seeing how Vegetta handles it though because knowing him... it'll be very interesting...#<-- I say this knowing full well they're just going to be their normal idiot selves and I'm so glad about it #I miss seeing Vegetta and Rubius interacting they're so funny together and they have a beautiful friendship #I do have my head in my hands listening to them talk sometimes though LMAO

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l3viat8an · 1 year

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I feel like this counts as one of my dumber thoughts- but I also know it’s something I would do 💀

But imagine in nightbringer MC’s just cleaning or something and starts singing some song outta their head like W.A.P. or whatever a song like that ya get the idea-

and all the brothers are just watching / listening like “What the fuck is that???” ‘n MC shouldn’t really say a song or music cuz nothing like that exists yet-

#ro’s dumb stuff tag #obey me!#obey me nightbringer #obey me #obmswd #obey me house of lamentation #obey me headcanons #obmswd hcs #obmswd headcanons #obey me hcs #posting random thoughts while writersblock kicks my ass 💀

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aphoticforest · 6 months

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As the want to be representative of the Permafrostshipping tag, I figure I should share the full image to my profile + a more recent commission I got... So, here's what I bought from @cheetuspeepus! The first one was back in March, and the second one was pretty recently :D (goes to show how long they've stayed in my mind)

#permafrostshipping #rika x grusha #grusha x rika #rgu reference #grusha getting bullied by me twice because i think it's funny seeing him in s dress #but i mean he *does* look good in them soo #oh one thing i will admit is that the first image still is my phone home screen #i know i dont need to give a reason for commissioning a certain person but it mattered to me with these #i felt comfortable with cheetus because she shipped them as well and i would feel less embarrassed for my commission ideas than-#if i went to someone who was neutral about the ship. not that people would make fun of someone wanting to commission them but you never know #basically i get random anxiety over dumb stuff #anyway im rambling so im just going to actually post this instead of stalling

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chibishortdeath · 7 months

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Maybe this is just me being autistic or something, but I do not understand how movie/TV adaptations of games are so hard to make. The original media is right there??? Just use it as a basis for your script?????? Add and subtract where necessary for the medium while still keeping it the same story at heart????????? “But it’d be boring if it was a whole tv show” ok then why is it not boring as a game???????????? Why do people replay games then???????????????????? I don’t get it.

#yeah this is about Castlevania #text post #like I watched multiple adaptations of Dracula #because I wanted the story of Dracula #I’d have been mad if it was a Dracula adaptation called Dracula and then wasn’t the story of the novel besides a couple character names #so why is it any different for games #if anything like you have more room in game adaptations #you can just adapt everything that’s there and add a ton of character development stuff that the game didn’t have space for?#ez???#idk I’m probs just stupid #might delete later cause this is dumb #anti netflixvania #just random ranting ig

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kittydoremi · 1 year

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You reposted in the wrong 06

#sonic 06 #princess elise #sonic the hedgehog #mephiles the dark #silver the hedgehog #sonic next gen #random stuff #memes #dumb stuff #shitpost #you reposted in the wrong neighborhood #sonic mmd #mikumikudance #mmd

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doctorbethanysartblog · 4 months

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A person holding a bunch of plushies of their friends is like top tier

#yogscast #xephos #yogs #Hello I am alive!#brain went aaaa for a bit #Anyway here i am with xephos because i love him i might make a blog for all the cluster stuff i wanna throw in #have some dumb fun with stuff #am i tagging everyone no but yes there are two randoms here #brain thougth this in shower EVERYONE ELSE STILL EXISTS #I dont know why i felt like i needed to justify that

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femmespoiled · 1 year

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reminder that reblogging and supporting terfs makes you a terf, baby

if you weren't you'd interact with literally any other (actual) feminist movement, I put out here a multitude of books about it (specially intersectional feminism)

Don't speak like you're just reblogging "feminist" posts

#psa #random stuff #btexts #let's not play dumb

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ganondoodle · 3 months

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sorry about that last rambling post, i didnt mean to sound like its worse than it may be, but i got no ... lense to view it through but my own, and the main reason i wrote it out anyway was bc i needed to get it out (even if posting it might be not the greatest idea) .. and bc it kinda showcases, i think, how my stories kinda write themselves, involuntarily in a way? its not like im not putting in any effort- but its like .. i cant STOP it always keeps going and even the dumbest idea stays in some form, its very hard to get everything in place bc theres so much going on all the while i am very slow at making anything, writing or drawing anything, especially anythign coherent is very hard bc not only do i get constantly distracted, i get distracted by my own thoughts suddendly skipping to a certain scene and me having to go throguh imagining in detail NO MATTER how many times i have done it before for the same scene that i already decided on how it goes, when theres a new idea it can take over my entire day bc i cant let go of it-

not trying to sound either like im the only that has that sort of problem, but i think its a big part as of why i start tso many projects without being able to finish them, or even start them bc i constantly have to fight my own thoughts from derailing into another daydream session, thinking of too much too fast than i can ever draw or even write about and not knowing what is worthwhile and what isnt (im telling you i have no idea what is good and what isnt, idk why but for all i know all things i do could be trash, or they all could be bad, maybe the one i thinnk is decent is actually worse than the things i deem not good enough and once i start to think no this isnt good enough i stop having fun making or thinking it bc im trying to do better

honestly its kind of impressive that i can get anything out at all, not to pat myself on the back there but even if i hate how long it takes me, considering how much im having to work just to start working on something at all, the fact that i could post stuff coherent enough for some people to understand AND LIKE is something i should be a little more proud of

#ganondoodles talks #personal #sorry today is a bit of a brain fart day #got a headache and have wasted the entire time until now (5pm) with watching old analysis videos i have watched 5 times already #and crying over undertales music #how much could i get done if i didnt have to deal with thought trains going 200 above speed limit #also didnt mean to sound mean to people who like the things i deem cringy #BC I DONT KNOW WHAT IM TALKIGN ABOUT 90% OF THE TIME #I DONT KNOW IF ITS GOOD maybe it is #my judgement of my own stuff is pretty random #.... maybe thats why i can work with fanstuff that adheres to lore better #bc it sets limits for me #it gives me options of rails to derail onto without falling straight into the woods #idk if that made sense either #... i need to start drinking more #(and i guess by calling some of my stuff cringe bc i am entirely unsure of its quality im trying to make myself smaller than i am)#(so if it turns out to be actually bad- im more safe from ridicule since LOOK I AM SELF AWARE)#and there i go letting my thoughts spin further #maybe ill delete both of these posts tomorrow when i realize how dumb this is to say in the first place

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