#queuetzalcoatl

[godsofhumanity]

Zeus: So how did you convince all our siblings to betray me? What did you offer them? Hera: I asked if they wanted to embarrass you and they instantly said yes.

#lol #zeus #hera #zeus x hera #hera x zeus #greek gods #greek mythology #incorrect greek gods #incorrect greek mythology #mythology #incorrect mythology #s: brooklyn 99 #queuetzalcoatl

[mythos-soup]

Ares: change is inedible.

Mars: I think you mean "inevitable"...

Ares: Nope. *spits out a bunch of pennies*

#mythology #classical mythology #incorrect mythology #incorrect quotes #greek gods #incorrect greek mythology #incorrect greek gods #greek mythos #greek myth #roman mythology #roman gods #incorrect roman mythology #incorrect roman gods #ares #mars #greco roman #queueueueueueueueueueueueueue #queue #queuetzalcoatl

[godsofhumanity]

Odysseus: "oh no we’re all doomed by the narrative" Odysseus: Maybe you are. I’m the narrative’s favorite. [later] Odysseus: Update: Turns out this is not a good thing for me.

#odysseus #greek heroes #greek mythology #incorrect greek gods #incorrect greek mythology #incorrect mythology #incorrect odyssey #mythology #incorrect greek heroes #greek gods #s: tumblr #queuetzalcoatl

[godsofhumanity]

Zeus: I can trust you, right? Hestia: Of course. Zeus: You do seem to be the least disturbed out of everyone in the family. Hestia: What an almost sweet thing to say.

#zeus #hestia #brotp #greek gods #greek mythology #incorrect greek gods #incorrect greek mythology #incorrect mythology #mythology #s: good luck charlie #queuetzalcoatl

[godsofhumanity]

Odin: There’s a thin line between being a genius and being a fucking idiot. Frigg: Loki uses that line as a skipping rope.

#odin #frigg #loki #brotp #norse gods #norse mythology #incorrect norse gods #incorrect norse mythology #incorrect mythology #mythology #s: tumblr #queuetzalcoatl

[godsofhumanity]

Odysseus, at the beginning of his journey: I hope nothing bad happens! Odysseus, now: I hope whatever bad things happen are at least funny.

#odysseus #greek heroes #greek gods #greek mythology #incorrect greek gods #incorrect greek heroes #incorrect greek mythology #incorrect mythology #mythology #s: tumblr #queuetzalcoatl

[godsofhumanity]

Athena: Take a look at this map of the world- Poseidon: You just keep one of those on you? Athena: Of course, in case I ever need to prove my point in an argument.

#athena #poseidon #greek gods #greek mythology #incorrect greek mythology #incorrect greek gods #incorrect mythology #mythology #s: brooklyn 99 #queuetzalcoatl

[godsofhumanity]

Hades: [trying to feel the baby kick] Hera: Sorry this is taking so long. He kicked for everyone else. Zeus: It's hard for the little one to perform under pressure. Demeter: Top 10 things Zeus said on his wedding night! Hades: Woah, it was small, but I think I felt something. Poseidon: Top 10 things Hera said on her wedding night. Hera: [starts laughing] Zeus: Stop laughing at it, Hera :( Hades, Demeter, Poseidon and Hestia: Top 10 things Zeus said on his wedding night!!

#zeus is one of those guys who likes making fun of others but hates when people do the same to him hee hee #hee hee haa haa #hera #hades #zeus #demeter #poseidon #hestia #zeus x hera #hera x zeus #greek gods #greek mythology #incorrect greek gods #incorrect greek mythology #incorrect mythology #mythology #s: how i met your mother (tv series) #queuetzalcoatl

[godsofhumanity]

Athena: Wow, Apollo. I had no idea you were so good with animals. Apollo: I’ve been taking care of Hermes and Dionysus for more than 100 years now and they've bitten me eight times. I plan on keeping it at eight too.

#hee hee #athena #apollo #hermes #dionysus #brotp #greek gods #greek mythology #incorrect greek gods #incorrect greek mythology #incorrect mythology #mythology #s: tumblr #queuetzalcoatl

[godsofhumanity]

Hermes: Why is my underwear in the freezer? Apollo: Last night, you said, "This is going to confuse me so much tomorrow." Apparently, drunk you plays pranks on sober you. Hermes: Hermes: That explains so much.

#hermes #apollo #greek gods #greek mythology #incorrect greek gods #incorrect greek mythology #incorrect mythology #mythology #s: tumblr #queuetzalcoatl

[godsofhumanity]

Achilles: The real secret to immortality? Not dying. You want to be immortal? Okay, that’s easy. Just don’t die. That’s it. Refuse to die. There you go. Patroclus: But how- Achilles: “But how”, you may ask. Well, easy. Just don’t do it. Refuse to. Say “no thanks”.

#achilles #patroclus #greek gods #greek heroes #greek mythology #incorrect greek gods #incorrect greek mythology #incorrect greek heroes #incorrect mythology #incorrect iliad #iliad #s: tumblr #queuetzalcoatl

[godsofhumanity]

Apollo: I'm from Delos, flirting is part of my heritage. Ares: What does that mean? Hera, walking past: His mother was a slut, too.

#lmfaooooooooo leto slander #apollo: >:((((( #apollo #ares #hera #greek gods #greek mythology #incorrect greek gods #incorrect greek mythology #incorrect mythology #mythology #s: tumblr #queuetzalcoatl

[godsofhumanity]

[doing a magic trick] Apollo: Pick a card. Any card. Hermes: Alright! Apollo: Apollo: ‘Any card’ does not include my credit card, put that back in my wallet.

#hermes #apollo #brotp #greek gods #greek mythology #incorrect greek gods #incorrect greek mythology #incorrect mythology #mythology #queuetzalcoatl

[godsofhumanity]

Zeus: Sometimes Hera asks me, "What do you think you're doing?! Zeus: But she just means "stop". She doesn't actually want to hear my thought process.

#zeus #hera #hera x zeus #zeus x hera #greek gods #greek mythology #incorrect greek gods #incorrect greek mythology #incorrect mythology #mythology #s: tumblr #queuetzalcoatl

[godsofhumanity]

[when Dionysus first came to Olympus] Hermes: *staring at Apollo* Apollo: *staring at Hermes* Hermes: Tomorrow night then! Apollo, nodding: Okay. Dionysus: How did you guys do that?!! Athena: It's called clown-to-clown communication. Dionysus: Can you teach me? Athena: Trust me, Dionysus, you don't want to join that circus.

#dio: guess ill start my own then. #hermes #apollo #dionysus #athena #brotp #greek gods #greek mythology #incorrect greek gods #incorrect greek mythology #mythology #s: umblr #queuetzalcoatl

[godsofhumanity]

Loki: Why is helping someone bury a body the standard for true friendship? Odin: It's just a saying that you're in it together no matter what. Loki: I'm all for that. I'll hide evidence, bribe people, lie to whoever I need to but I am not digging a hole in the ground. Odin: Why is that the one you won't do? Loki: Too much work. Sounds exhausting.

#real #loki #odin #brotp #norse gods #norse mythology #incorrect norse gods #incorrect norse mythology #mythology #incorrect mythology #s: tumblr #queuetzalcoatl