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iluv4my · 21 days

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How to Protect Yourself from Toxic Individuals Who Gaslight You and Use Emotional Tactics

Today i want to talk about something that I've been thinking about a lot lately like understanding when someone is trying to control our emotions and how we can set boundaries to protect ourselves and we all face this in different ways like with friends, partners, or even people we meet online

I often face such people and today i will share whatever i have learned its not like im very professional but im sharing here what I have read and learned

Emotional manipulation is when someone tries to control or influence you using your emotions They might make you feel guilty, doubt yourself, or question your own feelings

So here are some examples like how emotional manipulation can look -

1. The Guilt tripping

This is when someone tries to make you feel bad for not doing what they want by saying things like

- If you really cared about me you would do what i want

- I don't want to stay with temporary people stop caring about me or just let me be like this

2. Gaslighting

This is when someone tries to make you doubt your own thoughts and memories by saying things like

- You're just imagining things i never said that

- Maybe you should just leave me i know you'll just find someone else as soon as you have the chance anyway

3. Playing the Victim

This is when someone tries to make you feel sorry for them even though they're the one causing the problem so they might say things like

I can't believe you're upset with me i'm the one who's been hurt

Okay fine focus on your life don't care about me just leave me alone don't give me this kind of advice give it to someone else

4. Shifting Blame

This is when someone tries to make you feel like the problem is your fault instead of theirs they might say things like

It's not my fault you're upset you're just too sensitive

You're just wasting time with me i'm just your texting partner

Emotional manipulators often feel insecure or powerless by controlling others they feel a sense of power and prop up their own self esteem they might have learned these tactics from their own upbringing too

Their Personality Traits

1. Narcissism

Emotional manipulators often act like they're better than others and always want people to praise them and they need a lot of attention and don't care much about how others feel they think they're more important than everyone else and often complain too much .

2. Insecurity

Even though they may seem confident, emotional manipulators actually feel unsure about themselves. Deep down they might have had tough experiences in the past that make them feel bad about themselves so they try to control others to feel better about themselves.

3. Need for Control

Emotional manipulators always want things to go their way. They try to control what others do and say to feel powerful and important and they use tricks like making others feel guilty or pretending to be the victim to control how people act around them.

Understanding these traits helps us recognize when someone might be trying to manipulate us and It's important to stand up for ourselves and not let them control u

Reasons for Manipulation

What Makes Them Pull the Strings?

There are several reasons why people turn to manipulation here are some of the big ones:

Power and Control:

Many manipulators feel a deep seated need for power and control in their lives they might feel insecure or powerless on their own so manipulating others gives them a sense of superiority and helps them feel better about themselves.

Self Gain:

It's all about "me" for some manipulators they might use emotional tactics to get what they want whether it's money, favors, or simply getting their way in an argument

Fear of Abandonment:

Some manipulators are terrified of being alone they might use emotional blackmail or guilt trips to keep people close even in unhealthy relationships

Low Self Esteem:

Despite their controlling ways some manipulators actually have very low self esteem they might manipulate others to get the validation and approval they crave

Learned Behavior:

Sometimes manipulation is a learned behavior they might have grown up in a household where manipulation was the norm and they adopted it as a way to cope with the world.

How To Protect Yourself From these Manipulator

Set Boundaries

Make it clear what you're okay with and what you're not stick to your limits and don't let manipulators push you around

Trust Your Instincts

If something doesn't feel right trust your gut feeling take steps to keep yourself safe from further manipulation.

Don't engage in arguments

They want to get a rise out of you walk away

Focus on yourself

Prioritize your own needs and well being

Responding to Manipulation

Stay Calm

Try not to get upset or angry when dealing with manipulative people stay calm and stand up for yourself firmly

Be Assertive

Clearly say how you feel and what you want without being mean or starting a fight

Limit Interaction

If manipulation keeps happening even after you've tried to stop it think about spending less time with that person to protect your mental health

End Note :

These people think that by behaving like this they can protect themselves they always want attention and love from everyone around them but they don't notice or thank others for what they do It's better to let them go without worrying too much about them if you think you can change them you're wrong they'll just resist your efforts and keep complaining instead of appreciating what others do they often find fault in small things its better to focus on yourself and not let their behavior bother you

#self help #self discovery #self development #self reflection #self improvement #self love #self care #self healing #healing #level up journey #spilled thoughts #dark academic aesthetic #light academia #dark aesthetic #dark acamedia #desi teen #pyschology #literature #dark academia

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sophieinwonderland · 4 months

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Sysmeds: "Endos are the flat-Earthers of the plural community!"

Also sysmeds: "Stop quoting the DSM-5 and the ICD-11. And don't trust papers published by the American Psychiatric Association because they'll publish literally anything." *cites papers from the American Psychological Association as an example*

Again, I've made the same mistake before with the two APAs. It is confusing. I get that.

Mostly though, I find it funny how literally every single doctor who has written a paper on endogenic systems is like "we believe this is a real thing" or at least "yeah, this could be a real thing," and sysmeds will run in circles trying to invalidate all of them.

Sysmeds simultaneously cling to this belief that the science is on their side while spending most of their time trying to make up reasons to invalidate that science.

Just recently, we saw one individual falsely accuse Eric Yarbrough of being a transmed to discredit his opinion on endogenic systems shortly after another user tried pulling the ridiculous "only .gov and .edu sources are valid" thing yet again.

And I really have seen that last talking point far too often in syscourse, and it makes me severely concerned for our education system.

#syscourse #pro endo #pro endogenic #pyschology #psychiatry #science #actually a system

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meowz3rzparty · 28 days

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An updated Wip for the doctor masacrik fanfic ‼️

*You don’t know what happened, you couldn’t remember who you were, where you were, hell you couldn’t even remember your past. You woke up in a hospital, inside a patient room.you were in a hospital gown,nothing else. You were confused and scared. You had no clue what was happening of course you’d be frightened.*

*your whole body hurt as you sat up slowly. You looked down at your legs to see stitches going up your right leg, the area around the stitches being bruised and slightly red. It was so confusing and panic inducing. Eyes wide and aware as you looked around when you felt something on your head. You couldn’t see what it was though, but luckily there was a mirror in sight and you could slightly see into it. Seeing the cat looking ears sown onto the base of your head, also noticing a cat like tail sown onto your lower back.*

*But like I said, you couldn’t remember anything and had no clue if those had always been there on not. The only clue you would’ve had is how the stitches look. However you didn’t know what healed stitches look like, and even if you did I doubt you’d remember.*

“What the fuck..? W-why can’t I remember anything…?” *You stammered out quietly. You were trying to calm down by taking deep breathes except the stress of not being able to remember anything was making you anxious and scared. As you breathed heavily your eyes paced around the room and noted an iv tube inserted into your forearm. As you took notice of it you decided it would be a good idea to try and get it out and go ask someone for help. Your hand reached for the iv tube that was probably being used to give your body medicine, you grabbed it a gently started to mess with it trying to get it out*

“Ah your awake. Stop playing with your iv though..” *you hear a stern voice say suddenly,flinching slightly at the unexpected voice. Eyes darted to look over at the door frame of the room to see a tall figure, you couldnt quite make out who it was because it was quite dark. The ‘figure’ stepped into the room. A tall doctor, with strawberry pink hair that was short and slicked back, teal eyes glaring over at you. His style of clothes was… questionable. A mint teal button up top with a white hospital coat over it with his name tag on, “Doctor Masacrik”. Ah so that’s his name. His shorts were a maroon colour as he had heart covered stocking under them… interesting fashion choice.*

“W-what am I doing here..?! Why cant I remember anything-? Who even are you..!?” *you faltered out as your eyes were glued on this mystery doctor. Doctor masacrik looked down at you in amusement and mockery as you spoke frantically.. *

“Calm down.. Im Doctor masacrik, and your my new experiment, don’t worry though, I won’t hurt you.. yet” *he remarked as he started walking closer to you, you were confused but there was a feeling of comfort you got from him, it felt oddly comforting but stern, like he wouldn’t be afraid to get rid of you if you made the slightest mistake.* “oh, and don’t try and take these off” *he mentioned the ears* “their sown on, they won’t come off no matter how hard you pull or tug..” *his words were menacing.. making you want to cower up..*

“Your name is (users name)..” *he said as he leaned forward and grabbed your chin with his hand, lifting your head up to eye level..* “such a pretty pet.. I’m surprised you survived, you lost quite a lot of blood during surgery..” You looked up at him, confused but you felt a bit more safer now.. for some reason he brought a sense of peacefulnesses to you.*

“(Users Name)..? That’s my name-?” You asked quietly as his hand was on your chin still, his eyes examining you.*

“Yup, that’s your name~ now.. stand up I need to check if your legs still work..” *he said that as if he had done something to your legs, before her took a few steps back from you. It felt confusing but you had no one else at this point so you just listened to him, slowly crawling out of the hospital bed and stood up. You noticed your legs felt numb and were slightly hurting. He crouched down slightly so he could look at your legs closer up. He had made the muscle in your legs weaker so you couldn’t escape from him..*

“Good good, doesn’t look like I made them to weak.. we wouldn’t want you to be completely useless now would we (users name)…~? Does it feel weird or does it hurt…?” *he questioned mockingly as his hands moved up your legs.

“I-i feel weak.. but it doesn’t hurt..” *you trembled out softly as your eyes looked down at him.* “ that’s good.” *he said as he stood up and looked at you before his slender cold hand petted the ears on your head.. you couldn’t really feel it because it wasn’t an original part of your body but I felt comforting to an extent.* “sit back down, I’ll be back in bit..” *he said, his voice suddenly turning more stern and demanding

#fanfic #ao3 #doctor masacrik #dr masacrik #pyschology #meow meow #rahhhh #blog #writing #writers on tumblr #nursecore #SoundCloud

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rreskk · 11 months

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TREVOR PHILIPS EXTENDED ANALYSIS

Trevor Philips…

Drug dealer, “international CEO”, son, brother, friend.

TW: -Self harm -Implied drug use -Childhood abuse

I’ve made a longer analysis of Trevor as a character (THIS ISN’T A FANFICTION).

ENJOY!

Growing up in the Canadian region border of America, it has been portrayed that he has a complicated history surrounding family and mental illness. While it isn’t exactly proven (unless Trevor stated himself), his childhood had been the possible causes of his later behaviour and long-term issues. As for now, we see it as psychopathy, or as wiki would say “Intermittent Explosive Disorder” (impulsive behaviour and explosive temper that could lead to physical aggression). Others would argue that he suffers from borderline personality disorder, considering his struggle to contain stable relationships and is seen experiencing the main symptoms of what a person of BPD can have.

His childhood consisted of instability, financial stress, emotional damage, and physical abuse. Trevor mentioned his mothers constant absence to Lamar and Franklin during a friendly hangout. -“She came back, she left again, came back, left again…” The repeated cycle of his mother leaving, whether this was earlier or later in his teens, it would show the great affect it had on him, personally. Trevor made it clear about his abandonment issues during the storyline and dialogue. His whole idea of finding Michael was to fulfil the years of being abandoned and alone. Having experienced this instability for his childhood had took a toll on his emotional availability. The cravenness of reassurance, respect, presence, or just staying with him. However, his anger issues would make it harder for him to keep people around.

Trevor has also stated his anger management being poor since the beginning of his time. After having a conversation with Jimmy De Santa, he was asked when he knew what he wanted in life. It’s safe to say he had this psychotic mindset since birth, theoretically the result of his mother’s drug addict and poor lifestyle. -“I was pulling the legs off spiders, and I wanted more. I wanted to kill all the way up to the food chain until I hit top, the human being.” However, when being antagonised about this behaviour, he swiftly blames it on his childhood as Amanda would say: -“God, he is such a turd! That wounded childhood bullshit – we all had had shitty childhoods, you balding lump!” This same coping mechanism from Trevor is seen when being asked about his mother. We all know he has been through some verbal/emotional abuse as for his fear of talking about her. Trevor has never said anything negative about his mother despite complaining about his childhood… If someone dares speak her name, he’ll throw a fit, a rageful rant about respecting his mother, almost protecting the fact that she may be the reason for his tormented soul. The “Mrs Philips” mission towards the end of the game, we can see the emotional abuse he receives without doing anything wrong to deserve her bitterness. The constant insults and belittlement, Betty even demands Trevor to seek her medication and would not let him inside the trailer until it was finished. If this is bad enough during his adulthood, we can’t even imagine the mess he had to deal with during childhood. Nevertheless, his mother issues has inserted a particular taste in women throughout the years. -“Old women are to be cherished!” He'd say during a strangers and freaks mission. His calm behaviour towards Patricia and any lady in general would suggest his utter respect (or secret fear). He craves female attention and a maternal dependence. If we look at this closely, we may understand how the lack of maternal attachment between the first few years of his life (0-5 years) would influence his later decision to grow attachments to the wrong people, and the wrong things. (This is called attachment theory- psychological theory). Trevor’s mother may have missed most of his early childhood for financial gain (her stripping, prostitution, etc), and therefore left Trevor with whoever she had at home, his brother and some of his step-dads. Occasionally he was left alone.

Moving on to his difficult relationship with fathers in general, we can understand that the physical abuse he gets from the men in his past would influence his behaviour to men in the future and present. Trevor had grew up being physically abused and dominated, almost tricking his mind into exacting himself into the repeated cycle, turning into the abuse he got and aims the intensions to weaker men (Ron, Floyd, Wade) to fill in that insecurities he got from his biological and step-fathers. Although a father figure isn’t as important to a maternal figure, it did affect his perspectives and made his anger issues worse, especially (I can’t exactly remember the source) when Trevor’s biological father abandoned him in a shopping mall (that he later burnt down in retaliation). Being let down by many older figures had made him dependent on people in the future, people who have a stand in power with Trevor, someone who is able to balance and handle his anger (Michael and Franklin).

It has also been stated that his brother, Ryan, had died of unnatural causes. Elements of Trevor’s words would convince us that he had something to do with it considering they hadn’t of gotten along well enough… To live. However, there is not much information surrounding his brother during this time.

His education is flawed (dropping out before graduating) and being expelled due to the aggressive nature. Trevor had moved all over Canada and had been switched between care homes, trailers, schools, prisons all throughout growing up. However, he has surprising gains in mathematics and can workout sums within a second, and with full accuracy. Trevor is able to process mathematical problems fast, as Wade would say: -“He’s very good with numbers.” Furthermore, the lack of grammar and overall English makes him improvise during speeches and messages. Trevor always speaks metaphorically, he hyperbolises a lot, uses imaginative scenarios to engage the people around him. (Sometimes manipulating – extremely, to get his point across… even if it doesn’t make sense).

“I was a drifter up by the border, wandering from truck stop to truck stop, recently out of the military… Huffing gas, fucking people over, killing, eating, whatever.” Trevor’s discharge from the military was caused by the detached and restrained relationship with his mother. Psychologically, maternal dependence and relationships determines someone’s emotional strengths and depth… Trevor mentioned during an online heist that the therapist who was determining his worth would constantly try and talk about his mother, resulting in an episode which… Eventually led to his discharge (thanks to his anger issues). His dreams to fly planes would crush and Trevor would be left drifting around the Midwest, utterly defused and emotionally damaged. That’s until he meets Michael, and then Brad.

2004, the prologue. We can consider Trevor’s experience to be titled as “survivors guilt”. His loyalty and partnership with both Michael and Brad was cut off after they both unexpectedly got shot. Trevor lived with the guilt of seeing his best friends die, thinking he could of done something… But Michael had obviously told him to save himself, resulting in the 9 years of isolation and depression. He was unknown of Michael’s plan to escape the criminal aspects, feasting the money for himself, the money Trevor couldn’t access as his identity was blown. Imagining that Trevor had to shave his hair and beard just to pass the radar of his North Yankton wanted posters, he had to skip towns without money, and impressively invested a meth business, earning a good load to make him… Well, wealthy. His mother had been absent for years after being imprisoned (as it was mentioned through story-mode), leaving Trevor to be living in Sandy Shores with a successful rising drug business, but with the shame of his past abandonment and lawful struggles to keep his morality clean… Obviously his modesty being destroyed by the abuse of drugs and alcohol (his damaging coping mechanisms).

Unsuspecting Michael being alive, it was a total shock for him to see the news, a potential copycat… Yet Trevor knew. Trevor’s intuition was strong, always have been strong. Throughout the gameplay, Trevor has odd intelligence and senses. He can tell when something doesn’t fit and he’ll suddenly click. He can understand situations faster than most people. He caught eyes with Davey and he knew him. He first saw Michael after 9 years and knew he was lying. After some convincing… Michael’s denials had led Trevor to realise that Brad’s imprisonment was also a lie. It seems that although Trevor takes on the worse from his experiences, he also earns himself the skill to predict and understand unfolding events. He can attack and approach situations, while impulsively, but effectively.

Further notes: Trevor’s coping mechanisms would include niche drugs, alcohol, sex, pornography, aggression, self-harm, and isolation. He finds himself deeply attached to women in general, often exploiting himself by seeing many prostitutes and masturbating to pornography daily. This would be the result of his mother’s absence and abuse… Nevertheless, he engulfs in self-harm (hitting his head, biting, scratching, etc) as a way to defuse his self-hatred (as he always saw himself as the problem… Thanks to his childhood again). His suicidal tendencies is pretty obvious throughout the gameplay.

#trevor philips #trevor gta #trevor philips headcanons #gta trevor #grand theft auto #grand theft auto 5 #grand theft auto v #grand theft 5 #grand theft v #anaylsis #pyschology #michael townley #michael de santa #franklin clinton #bradley sniper #north yankton #gta

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selenepluto · 1 year

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crabgodd · 4 months

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Thinking about fandom hiveminds (non-derogatory) and how massive groups of people who don’t know each other personally can decide on one thing pretty generally. Like has anyone done a study on this?

The Magnus Archives is a great example on how a whole cast of characters with few to no canon descriptors of their physical traits managed to still all have highly agreed upon looks. This was to the point that when Encanto was coming out everyone was saying Bruno looked like Jonathan Sims when I don’t think he has any canon appearance.

It gets even weirder when you compare fandoms where characters have decided canon looks that lead to almost the opposite effect where no one can decide what they look like. Fandom generally doesn’t seem to care what the author says and they almost fair better when being able to collectively agree upon their favorite traits for a character, probably because a large part of fandom is expressing yourself through a chosen story and it’s easier to do that with a highly customizable story (or in some senarios everyone decides the story can be customizable whether the author wrote it that way or not).

It’s almost the more customizable a fandom space is the longer it lasts and the stronger it is. Take the furry fandom, with no set media, that exists around the idea of customizing your own creature and is probably going to last forever.

#(long form) thinking of #the magnus archives #pyschology #more

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m0nst3rgunxz · 1 month

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MY SCHOOL LIBRARY HAS THE DSM-5!!!!!!! I'M GONNA KNOW SO MUCH ABOUT MENTAL ILLNES. IM GONNA KNOW ALL THE DIAGNOSTIC CRITERIA!!!!!!! FUCK FUCK FUCK/POS

I think the most autistic thing ive done this month is start to develop a hyperfixation on neurology and psychology💀💀💀

#REGULAR HIGH SCHOOLER ACTIVITIES #I <3 THE DSM 5 #dsm 5 #pyschology #autism #mental illness

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thecalminside · 6 months

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Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.

-Carl Jung

#carl jung #quote #peace #calm #stillness #life #wisdom #inner peace #love #happiness #spiritual #pyschology #non duality #non dualism

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blackswaneuroparedux · 1 year

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A poet is a nightingale who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds.

- Percy Bysshe Shelley

#shelley #percy bysshe shelley #quote #poet #melancholy #contemplation #inspiration #writing #poetry #femme #shadows #darkness #inner darkness #pyschology

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kafkasapartment · 1 year

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Before mass leaders seize the power to fit reality to their lies, their propaganda is marked by its extreme contempt for facts as such, for in their opinion fact depends entirely on the power of (a) man who can fabricate it.

Hannah Arendt, The Origins of Totalitarianism

#democracy #quotes #hannah arendt #Fascism #communism #history #histoire #historia #totalitarian #pyschology #culture

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puddingseikkx · 1 month

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Advice?? please urgently.

i really struggle with my mental health and im not in school rn and theres not a lot of options for me, i have to make a decision by tomorrow is what my family hopes but i think i need more time. im visiting my sister back home for the month and we came upon the question if i want to stay here with my sister and do school (i like the school i was in when i used to live here and the program they have) or if i should stay in california with my mom and do school there. now i like the school where my sister is and preferably id rather stay here IF all i had to worry abt was school. but in terms of healthcare for a main doctor i think its great here but i need a psychiatrist and theres nothing here since its a small area and my sister likes to eat healthy so i also like that theres mostly only healthy food in the house and with my mom its hard to say how we’re living rn. shes looking for a place near her work since she commutes 2 hrs to work and stays in hotels over night 5-6 days a week but theres a great psychiatrist over there and im sure i can find a good doctor as well but where im living currently with my mom isnt ideal and quite mentally straining so until we move over it sucks and im honestly much happier here with my sister but theres more opportunity for me over with my mom but im tired of waiting for the time it gets better ive thought abt going to school here and living with my mom but until we move id rather not bc i dont have motivation to do anything there. plus whenever i came back here with my sister my hair stops falling out sm, i have more energy to shower more often, i even plan to work out a bit more, although if i was with my mom when we’d move id have access to gyms unlike here and im a dancer as well so having a good space is very crucial to me. so what im thinking rn is should i bring up staying here the rest of the month then come to get my things and until enrollment starts for the new school year i stay there but ill do my own independent studies and i’d say maybe stay with my mom and comeback with my sister or vice versa idk what to do. help? sorry if this is all over the place but i tried my best to explain..

#ed bllog #ed vent #ana male #ed male #tw vent #advice #pls help #pyschology #school #personal vent

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