En Directo desde twitch.tv/crazrael
En YouTube desde https://youtu.be/O5IuoT0X45Y
Encargo - Psicofan (Psychofan)
▶ Dale a Like
Photo of Kerry from the psychofan gig.
The gig is so freaking creepy.
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Cyberpunk 2077 AU where everything is the same except Johnny Silverhand walks around in these the entire time:
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Wow someone’s mad! People like this are sad and need help. THIS IS MY PAGE SWEETIE! If you don’t like what I say then move tf on and find a page you can relate to. And let me say something I listened to every prince album, front to back I’m a huge fan so come correct! Like I said before and I will say it again HE WASN’T that into her the way you think! He fucked her for sometime married her and then dropped her ass after 4 years! Forget a album, forget some love songs. He wanted everyone to know that their marriage was fake! He said it publicly that he wanted to annul the marriage. And that’s a fact boo! She even said it in her book! Oh yes I read that too and even with her trying to protray herself as some angel I still seen through the bull.. Keep representing for a person who don’t give two fucks about you! These mayte stans get on my nerves! So pressed for a bitch that don’t even know you exists! 🤣🤣
hippity hoppity here goes the long ass rant about my cousin
for context - i was a kid when i started liking kpop, like 13-14 yrs old? i was still collecting plushies, reading magazines for young teens, enjoying some music and playing sims. yes, i may have had my emo episode back then with some heavy music too, and that never went well with my mum’s older sister and her heavily religious husband, but oh boi, the worst was my cousin. she is 6 yrs older than me and that was around the time she started picking out an university to go to, so the focus HAD to be on her, the important future student and her boyfriend and this and that... she was always going on about going to art school and she was really fucking talented so she had all chances to be a really great artist, getting married to her boyfriend, wanting a family and all her future, while i was just a middle school kid dressing in all black, who suddenly started enjoying some fun kpop song on their otherwise heavy metal/rock music playlist.
when she find out, she was GIVING ME HELL for it. do you remember 2013 kpop? adtoy by 2pm, ringa linga by gd & taeyang, gentleman by psy or fantastic baby by bigbang? i fucking loved those songs. i was a kid in a really bad place in life after moving 2 countries away from the place where i was born, from all my friends, my school, my life... listen, it’s 10 years hitting this year since my mother decided about moving and i’m still not over it, so just imagine, how bad i must’ve felt back then, when it wasn’t even a year after the move? i was a devastated little kid who found a little joy in some fun, jumpy kpop tones in contrast to the usual heavy music i was listening to usually (do you remember the oldest bring me the horizon songs, all the screaming and anger? think of it as my regular playlist, my mother hated it haha). i was never a diehard fan, never had posters of idols on my walls, i only have like 2 merch pieces (and those aren’t even original cuz we were poor and could never afford it, so i looked up the merch online and my mum had a similar thing done in a local, cheaper workshop for my birthday one time, please don’t judge me for that) and it was just music for me, as well as the english, american, japanese, polish and hungarian music was just music too.
and i got terrible shit for it from my cousin, who pretty much criticized everything about me: my clothes (we were poor, i was mostly dressing out of second hand shops and surprise - her hand-me-downs), my shitty phone (and old samsung model i got for my 9th or 10th bday), my taste in books (i really REALLY loved king’s books to which one of my classmates introduced me back then), my inability to perfectly speak the language (though i was raised in a bilingual household, the main language in my house was hungarian, and i was a stubborn kid who rarely ever wanted to speak polish at home, so when we moved i could barely speak the language, had to take extra classes every day in school for almost the entire first school year i spent here because i had to learn to write and speak properly), but the biggest shit i always got for kpop, that it’s garbage, that i don’t even understand it, it’s just shitty party music with extra steps... i resented her for that A LOT, which probably had smth to do with the age difference too, but hey, whatever. i always closed up when we visited them and my mum was understanding about it, she pretty much allowed me to just hang around the place and listen to my music, play on my phone or just read a book, and my aunt hated it - but it was at least peaceful, i occasionally got the kpop jab from my cousin which i shrugged off, but that was it... until one time i spoke up.
i can’t remember what it was about - but we were all having lunch and it was easter or christmas maybe, and at a certain point i got called out for something, maybe using my phone under the table? anyway, i spoke up about treating me like shit because i was already 15 by that and i had a big fucking mouth and no tolerance for their bullshit after listening to it for two years, which ended in my mother almost going into a shock after hearing my vicious remark, my aunt’s husband going into a raging fit and my aunt telling my mum that she’s a terrible mother and raised a terrible kid. we left after that and i didn’t return to them in the following years - i just heard from the grapevine that my cousin ended up dropping out of college because “it was just too tiring and too much”, broke up with her boyfriend and then was just sleeping around with some random dudes, and generally just misrailed her life and had to move back in with her parents who were devastated after all their hopes about my cousin went to hell.
i haven’t seen them for years - we sort of reconciled a few years later when my mother forced me to do it; my cousin probably forgot by then whatever shit she was giving me earlier and we hanged out a bit, caught up and shit... i’m pretty sure it was only because she was to get married to her boyfriend and wanted the whole family there? not important.
the boyfriend is a pretty awful person imo tbh - he has some nationalist tendencies, not once spoke up in a very homophobic and derogatory way about all kind of lgbtq+ people, which in the end resulted in me removing him from all my social medias, because miss me with that nationalism babe. anyway, they got married and moved into their own place and into the family spotlight again, while i finished school and then years after their wedding my mum announced very proudly that i finished school with good grades and got into university - which immediately stirred the shit in the old shit bucket our relations were. my own fucking aunt dared saying that i’ll never succeed in life and will drop out than her own daughter would because i’m not made for a successful life. she never said it to my face - said it to my mother, who gave up a job she loved just so she could send me half a country away from my home so i could study where i wanted. i mean, i have my own issues with my mother too but i can’t not admire her sacrifices she made for me - so that sort off hit it off again with me and i once again burned bridges with them when moving out 3 years ago. seen them maybe two times since then? i mean, i never tried reaching out to them - they only ever got some happy birthdays and merry christmases on facebook, because my mother insisted i do that. they never called or wrote back, not for my birthday, not for christmas, not for anything else. i only found out in the last few months that on that christmas 2 yrs ago, which i spent alone, they were asked by my mum to please invite me over at least for a coffee. they never even called and my mum was heartbroken over it, because she was literal thousands of kilometres away, working and counted on her sister to invite me... my mum’s friends, basically strangers, ended up inviting me over for a christmas dinner in the end. i spent a family holiday with people i’ve literally seen five times in my life and they were more than joyful to have me in their company and they even got me a present, while my technically closes family couldn’t even spare a phone call.
now i’m 23 and my cousin is closing on 30 - and she’s suddenly overcome with that kpop obsession she has, spamming both instagram and facebook with mv links, fantaken photos, band-related posts and news articles, all heart emojis and “OmG i LoVe ThEm” kind of bullshit captions, she’s intensely drooling over certain members she’s posting a lot about, i’m seeing at least 15 posts daily about her bad drawings of members of the band.... listen.... if an artist doesn’t practice for 7+ yrs, the skills they had just start to fade away even if they were really talented (trust me, i know it from my own experiences, i used to know how to draw, sing and play a few instruments when i was young but then i stopped practicing and now the most i can draw in a stickman, i can’t play any instruments for shit and i’m a low average in singing too), but she thinks she’s some motherfucking superstar of drawing portraits (trust me, shes NOT) and keeps spamming all those pics and posts and shit.... and just seeing that sort of brought the memories back, of her treating me like shit over a thing she’s now obsessed with and i’m just sitting here like.... gag.
i could absolutely understand being a fan and being a group stan but there is a certain limit after which being a fan turns into that gross, twisted thing. do you know all those memes that go along the lines of “i don’t hate kpop because of the music, i hate kpop over the r*tarded fans it has”? that’s a whole ass mood. i’m sure that everyone who’s at least interested in kpop heard of the insane psychofan part of the fanbase.... and she’s turning into it. she’s fucking drooling over some famous strangers while she’s like... 30. and has a husband. would it be so hard for her to “keep it in her pants”? i’m super NOT interested in seeing all that crazy fan shit she’s pulling and honestly she’s grossing me out and you know people like her are the reason i can’t even fucking enjoy kpop anymore the way i did earlier - because it’s being fucking pushed down my god damned throat every-fucking-where i look. just calm the very fuck down, please. behave like a god fucking damned adult.
been wonderin for days...... why does my cousin keep drawing portraits of bts members..... when she always claimed to hate kpop....... and always dragged me for liking kpop......... what the fuck is happening.........
I really REALLY love your blog. is that make me a psychofan? I hope so hehe
Thanks! Let's just say fan though and leave out the psycho part.
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yall have 0 comprehension abilities and 0 sarcasm awareness. damn life must be so hard for the people around you. oh and by the way, when you put a space between anti and cockles in your tags, the post will still show up in the cockles tag. 😘 i won't hold it against you though, your brain cells can only do so much.
I'll try not to hold it against you for being a musha psychofans. Your brain can only do so much.
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Psychofan, you say?
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Cyberpunk 2077 // Psychofan 1/1
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For the cyberpunk ask! 4,16, and 16!
Thx for your ask!!! <333
(Okay let’s just make 6, 16 and 26 - I make typos myself quite often)
4. How many V’s/OC’s do you have?
- 2 (for now). Val (fem-streetkid-V) is my main OC and Vince (male-nomad-V) isn’t an actual V anymore (he’s the nomad from the prologue, crossed the border with Jackie, is a merc, but Val’s the one stuck with Johnny).
6. Have you played with multiple genders for V or just one?
- first run fem-streetkid-V, second run male-nomad-V. Next run will be male-corpo-V and I planned another fem-streetkid but I’m not sure about it... maybe I’ll just make another run with Val (first run).
16. What’s your favourite song(s) on the radio?
Don’t even have to think about this: HOLE IN THE SUN!
I listened to the CP radio for weeks on spotify before I finally was able to play the game (in January) and I loved this song instantly!
26. What’s one of the dumbest things you’ve encountered or had happen?
I really don’t have many bugs or glitches, even on the PS4pro, so I don’t know any “dumb” stuff. Some funny thinks happend, like Jackie with invisible guns during The Rescue, just with ‘finger guns’.
Me, driving in this game leads to lot of dumb things (and dead pedestrians). Oh, I had a glitch during Psychofan - the two (?) people in the apartment were standing in each other, idle position beside the couch and they showed no reaction at all. Like mannequins.
Gave my V the Psychofan apartment in my fic, partly because Samurai, and partly so Jackie can move in and they can be roommates and get up to even crazier shit 😂
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All hail the headcanon queen (just kidding.. or am I? I do like to read yours haha) ((I have an odd sense of humour))
So I have a crazy (???) theory. It started with a random thought that I entertained; the guitar you steal from the psychofan actually goes back to Kerry. My thought was mostly “wouldn’t it be funny if it suddenly hung on the wall and V goes ‘wtf.. I could have brought it here instead of to that drop off point if I had known’”.
That was until I noticed something (no it doesn’t actually end up on the wall, but..!): in one of the mails on Kerry’s laptop, he asks someone to find a particular guitar. By the sound of it, he used to own a particular model but seemingly no longer does. Kerry says that “he doesn’t care if it’s the same one, just get one of (model name)”. What if the person who had to look for that guitar contacted a fixer (Padre), and V ends up fetching the guitar. Unfortunately, it’s only “Kerry’s guitar” if scanned. Yet, I like to think that it might be the one he was looking for.
HEY MY LOVE
fsklkgdlkhj i love you hahahah and you know what’s so weird, i’ve thought about this before!!
with the guitar and V going to steal it back for Padre, i’ve always thought about where it actually ended up, because i know that Padre doesn’t actually say who the guitar’s going to (i think he just calls them his client, right?) but in my head i’ve always reasoned that he wouldn’t say he had Kerry has a client because Padre’s a man of honor and values confidentiality especially with his more high profile clients (they all must have some) but in actual fact the guitar did end up going back to Kerry.
like, i like to imagine that the guitar does end up back where it should be (with Kerry obvi) and V notices it at some point, on the wall or wherever, and is like wait, hold on, that’s... i stole that??? i broke into a crazy man’s house who tried to steal your face and listened to johnny bitching for going on fifteen minutes because he wasn’t the favourite so i could steal this guitar and now you’re telling me this is your guitar?????
mostly because in some weird longwinded way, there’s the whole conversation about “fate” that we can then go into but i won’t because i’ll be here talking about it all day and how it just always ends up revolving back around Kerry and V somehow. but it’s there. fate. i think it all the time with the two of them.
similar to how i’ve headcanon’d that the reason V owns Eurodyne merchandise is because Kerry was always destined to be in V’s life in some way, shape or form. from the branding on a dirty vest or sick biker jacket to physically being in his life as the man he loves. he was always meant to end up there, with him, and vice versa.
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May I prompt thee with the trope you just reblogged?
Kerry getting hurt / kidnapped because of some psychofan (someone like Spector mentioned.. or like slayton whose apartment was basically a Kerry shrine), and V going nuts. (If you want to ☺️ no pressure)
YOU ABSOLUTELY MAY, MY SWEET. LOVE U. ENJOY.
An unknown caller flashes up on his HUD.
He lets it ring out, keeps his eyes glued to the three gang-goons he's been watching for the last five minutes instead. So far it's been a whole lot of talking and not enough action, he's practically falling asleep, but any minute now.
Job's an easy one. Has his target pinned already—Jacob Cutler, one of Night City's slimiest. V's heard whispers about him in the past, but he's never had the privilege of making his acquaintance. 'Til now, anyway, when he's getting paid to. But all he needs to do is acquire the shard he's packing, get it to Regina, that's it. Winner's choice if he zeroes him or not, but from what he's been told, the world would be better without him in it.
So he's waiting, playing a longer game than he usually would. Patient until he flashes the merchandise so he knows he for sure has it on him, and then he'll pick him off the second his chooms have their backs turned.
Couple of minutes later, his phone rings again. Unknown caller, just like before.
He rolls his eyes and curses under his breath as he answers. Talk about bad timing. "For fuck's sake," He utters under his breath, keeping his voice hushed when he snaps, "What?"
"Oh, I—good afternoon sir," Some guy stumbles on the other end. "My name is Dr. Harold Chandler, I'm calling from Stuart Hospital. I'm looking for a Mr..." Pause. "Ah, there's... there's no surname, uh, okay, can I speak with a Mr... Vincent, please?"
"Yeah, speaking. But it's just V." He's too busy trying to concentrate, but he could've sworn he heard this guy call himself a doctor. "Who did you say you were again?"
the rest can be read here on ao3. it was way too long to bring to tumblr gdlgjdlkhj.
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pls, if you would be so kind, spare me some kerry/vincent fluff. i can't stop thinking about what their first official date would've been like, whether or not it would've ended somehow in chaos or whether they would've actually gotten some real time together. like, did kerry get too excited and post their location on social media and they get swarmed by fans? did anything get blown up or burnt down? i need answers cdpr
ekekekekekekeeekeek *cat noises* SO what I really like to imagine is that
I think they’d try to keep the tradition of ‘not doing things by Night City’s book’ alive. Kerry would be curious about the Nomad concept of a romantic date and what it entails, and Vincent is like… ‘errrr we… drive around… go drink in some seedy place… and then idk watch the stars?or whatever comes up really? and get laid in the backseat if we get lucky?’
‘SOUNDS NOVA, GIMME THAT NOMAD LOVING’.
(I like to think about Kerry in disguise an unhealthy amount cause imagine him rehashing his ‘I don’t wanna hear it’ sort of look but with some needed variations and V is *heart eyes* ‘omg you’re adorable & you managed to Not look like a bank robber from the movies this time’)
Anyway. Off to the highway they go, just driving around and chatting and * cute handholding over the shifter* *leg rubs* *’there is a light that never goes out’ playing softly but please no ten ton trucks crashing into anybody*
V. would pick some place that is halfway decent and has some scenic view for the drinks, Kerry is very excited to be out of the house and away from Night City’s eyes and is super eager to let his hair down and relax. V slipping some eddies to the bartender for silence just in case. The place is filled with cigarette smoke and the radio plays rock n roll oldies, Ker digs it, they drink the best tequila the house has to offer and play pool , they both suck dramatically at it but it doesn’t matter because it’s all about slapping each other’s ass when one is bent down on the table, really.
Drinks pile up and they’re throwing caution to the wind quite a bit, and don’t realize that the place has been filling up with people. And they’re chatting all lovey-dovey at some table in a far corner quite unaware of their surroundings when V. notices there’s a crowd of people staring a bit too much and typing rabidly on their holos as they whisper things to each other and _oh no_
-Ker. Don’t turn around. I think we have a... situation
-Oh fuck. They got me didn’t they? I took off the sunglasses for literally 10 SECONDS
- It’s your eyes. Your beautiful perfect eyes but, ehm, anyway. They seem ready to pounce
and Kerry is all mortified because of course it would happen but V has already activated tactical boyfriend mode
- NO NO wait I have a PLAN. I’m gonna walk over and spill my drink on some poor fool and pretend to pick a fight. I’ll distract them.
- V. I don’t want you to get punched in the face by a psychofan.
- Just listen. When you hear me yell ‘DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH THIS SHIT COSTS, YOU GONK’ or something, you dash to the door. Don’t stop, get to the car & I’ll be right after you. I’ll parkour on their fucking heads if needed.
And so they do. V. starts his best impression of an outraged person and Kerry is bolting it yelling ‘bye fuckers’. A psychofan grabs him on the stairs but V is right behind and the guy gets a fist in the face before he can do shit. They get in the car while Ker’s brain is 100% ‘witnessing you punch a guy for me was the nicest AND hottest thing that ever happened to me’. They speed out of the parking lot and put in fifth and there’s still cars tailing them cause these people won’t stop at nothing. They’re laughing like gonks blasting some high.speed worthy tune. Kerry is like
‘V. do you by any chance have a grenade lying around’
‘Ker we’re not throwing a fire grenade at them’
‘...a smoke grenade, on the other hand…’ (cue to an ecstatic Kerry halfway out of the window tossing a smoke bomb their way as V holds him by the jacket lest the man falls out in his bombing enthusiasm). It does the trick, they wroom into the night, take a bunch of side roads before stopping and taking a breather. Kerry is hyped.
- Best. date. ever.
- Was a high speed chase nomad-y enough?
- Damn right it was. By the way what was that you said about stars and y’know, backseats? :>
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In dieser Folge gehen wir mehrere Nebenaufgaben an. In "Fünfte Kolonne" sollen wir für eine Journalistin im Zuge der Wahl belastendes Material in einem Restaurant finden, welches einem Kandidaten gehört. Kein Problem für uns: schnell rein, unsichtbar wieder raus. Johnny seine Gitarre gilt es in "Psychofan" einem Sammler zu stehlen. Dabei wird auch der harte Kerl recht sentimental, denn er kennt die Person.
There’s a lot of things I wished Johnny commented on in-game but it’s a genuine, legitimate travesty he doesn’t say anything if you try typing “696969″ as the passcode in ‘Psychofan’
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