#pseudo-art-rose

[pseudo-art-rose]

sequence of consequences

#pseudo #art #rose #pseudo-art-rose #abstract #artists on tumblr #contemporaryabstract #poster #artistsoninstagram #vo5uru #concept art #digital artist #artist on tumblr #colorophilia

[quatari]

i have philosophy dirk brainrot

#homestuck #homestuck art #homestuck fanart #dirk strider #philosophy #antinatalism #david benatar #rose would definitely shove the second sexism right into his pseudo-intelligent face #because fuck that #why cant male philosophers also be decent fucking people #i relate so heavily to better never to have been #why david benatar why #myart

[rallamajoop]

Translating the original RE8 trial scene storyboard

RE8’s bonus DLC concept art pack includes a couple of pages of an early storyboard for the trial scene, dating to back when Miranda was still going to be a foreign researcher rather than a village native, and Ada Wong was still part of the cast. Though the text is all in Japanese, I had a crack at translating it ‒ it makes for a fascinating comparison to the finished game.

Images and translations are under the cut below – but here’s the dot-point version of how this older storyboard compares to the finished one.

Instead of Miranda, the trial is overseen by a masked figure called only ‘shaman’ (祈祷師). Instead of lycans, the trial is attended by numerous villagers, all eager to see Ethan punished.

This may be the big one: the shaman claims an ‘Adam-sama’ has been angered by Ethan’s (unspecified) crimes. My best guess at this mysterious ‘Adam’ is that it might be a name for the megamycete. Whoever he is, all the 'Eve' connotations of Eva/Eveline (and even the Rose flasks) suddenly start to sound a whole lot more significant.

Even here, the trial is dominated by Dimitrescu and Heisenberg fighting over who gets Ethan – or at least who gets his body, after his execution. Dimitrescu still wants his blood, while Heisenberg presumably wants him for soldat-material. Moreau briefly makes his own bid, but he just wants to eat Ethan.

Donna’s one act is to apparently stop time at a crucial moment to speak directly to Ethan without anyone else hearing – though this seems to be an illusion she creates while contacting him psychically. No sign of Angie, who probably isn’t part of the game yet.

Rather than escaping through Heisenberg’s gauntlet, Ethan is rescued by Ada Wong (disguised behind a plague mask). I’m guessing Heisenberg’s role as pseudo-ally hadn’t fully developed while Ada was still supposed to be involved.

Conflict between the lords seems to be framed more as conflict between separate houses/families. Heisenberg makes a reference to ‘us Heisenbergs’ (perhaps this is from the time when his mother, father and twin brother were also supposed to be characters?) and Moreau to his ‘Kuku-family’.

Though the name ‘Heisenberg’ does appear, he’s mostly called ‘Geek’, while Moreau is ‘Half-fish-man’ (半魚人), and Donna is simply 'Spirit' or 'Ghost' (心霊). Lady Dimitrescu is the only character who is actually called that (though it’s mostly abbreviated to just ‘lady’). I could not tell you why a Japanese dev team would decide that ‘geek’ was a good moniker for their heavy-metal-Frankenstein-wannabe, but here we are. (Note that most of the game files associated with Heisenberg are still labelled ‘geek[something]’, so clearly this was a moniker that stuck. Donna’s files are almost all called ‘ghost[something]’. Moreau and Dimitrescu mostly get shortened/mangled into 'moro' and 'domi'.)

Heisenberg and Dimitrescu actually come to blows over Ethan in this version, with Heisenberg launching his hammer at her and seemingly killing her, or at least blowing her away. But I think we can take it as read that even in this version, she'll show up okay and be back to torment Ethan later.

Oh, and did I mention this little addendum at the end which hints at Miranda doing some kind of surgery on Chris? WTF?

Standard disclaimer for all my Japanese translations: I’m nothing like fluent, and rely on online dictionaries for a lot of harder vocabulary. Corrections from anyone better qualified are welcome.

Okay, on to the actual translations! I'll include the full pages as we get to them, but I'll also break them down into smaller chunks so I can share and translate smaller chunks as we go through.

Page 1

[Ethan wakes up to find he can't move because his handcuffs are chained to the floor]

[Ghost-nobles and villagers buzzing in the church]

[Banging noise as shaman bangs his staff]

Shaman: "Everyone, quiet!"

[Church falls silent]

Shaman: "I have heard from each of the lords. This man's crime threatens the very foundations of our family! Lord Adam is furious! To allow this man to live will bring disaster upon the village! Only his death will appease Lord Adam's anger!"

[Cheering from the crowd]

Lady Dimitrescu: "In that case, after the execution, the Dimitrescu family shall receive the victim. My daughters haven't had nearly enough blood to drink of late."

Geek (Heisenberg): "Oi, wait a minute. From what I've heard, you witches have had it your own way long enough."

["Geek" burns Ethan's hand with a cigar]

Geek: "Us Heisenbergs will be taking this one, got it?"

[Ethan shrieks in pain]

Lady: "Didn't you have several victims sent to you just the other day?"

[Half-fish-man (半魚人) walks up to the Geek]

Half-fish-man (Moreau): "Oh, grant him to my Kuku-family, I.. I want to break him open and eat his insides!" (Note: I think Moreau's actually saying something even more colourful here, but I'm having trouble translating it)

[He approaches Ethan, parasites emerging from under his hood]

["Geek" halts him, brandishing his hammer]

Half-fish-man: [Groaning noise]

Lady: "I will not allow you two to do as you please!"

Geek: "Hm, how to settle this?"

Half-fish-man: "Oh, oh…!"

[Rising noise of cursing onlookers]

[Geek raises his iron hammer]

Page 2

[The moment he throws his hammer at Lady Dimitrescu, a halucination begins and time seems to stop. Direction and focus of camera fits the spirit]

Ghost (Donna, in a voice no-one else can hear): "….(You… have summoned him… receive your reward…)"

[Reality returns]

[The hammer pierces Lady D. and blows her away, part of the church collapses. Panic as villagers fall or die]

Geek: "Don't worry. Your corpse will become my plaything."

[A mysterious masked figure appears and fires three shots into Heisenberg, five into the shaman]

Masked figure: "Run!"

[Cuts the chain holding Ethan to the floor]

Geek: [getting up] "..what the…?"

Shaman (still full of arrows) yells to the villagers: "What are you doing! Don't let them escape! After him!"

Masked figure: "This way!"

[Still handcuffed, Ethan runs through passages before finally making it outdoors]

Page 3

Masked figure: [while reloading crossbow] "Your daughter is alive. Go get her back, okay?"

Ethan: "What are you…"

[Masked figure sees someone coming from behind] "No time, go!"

[Ethan screams as he's thrown over the railing]

[And here endeth the storyboard]

Page 3 Addendum

This brings us to the latter half of Page 3, which contains only a single column of panels. Remaining space features an extra half-page of Miranda in her original foreign-scientist incarnation, pictured with what I assume were some of her experiments. There's some text on these too ‒ hand-written rather than typed, which made it a right bastard to figure out. But I had a crack anyway, because even at a skim-read it had me going, "wait, does that say the monster is Chris?"

Yep, it does. The captions (as best I could make them out) read "Miranda's paranormal organism experiment" (奇生体の実験) and "After plastic surgery on Chris' face" (クリスの顔に整形後).

This only raises so many more questions. Is Chris actually working with Miranda, or has she captured him for experiments? Is she repairing Chris' face after some horrific accident? Is she altering some monster to make it look like Chris Redfield? Or ‒ in a far more entertaining possibility ‒ was this meant to be an in-game justification for why RE7's Chris looks nothing like he does in RE8?

I have no answers for you, but you can really feel how much this game changed in development just from these little glimpses of what might have been.

#Resident Evil Village #Karl Heisenberg #Lady Dimitrescu #Mother Miranda #Donna Beneviento #Salvatore Moreau #Chris Redfield #Ada Wong #meta #RE lore #Resident Evil #cut content

[powdermelonkeg]

Gale of Waterdeep assorted headcanons: 2

Headcanons 1 here, Tower layout here

He overshares when he's drunk. It's a good look into how his brain works, but he has a 50/50 chance of putting his foot in his mouth

He has a handful of custom spells, one of those being an illusory campsite. Gale's Minor Mirage, he calls it. You're welcome!

The stitch scar on his neck is from being held at knifepoint by a particularly opportunistic thief. Said thief got hit with a lightning bolt

His spellbook is beautifully scripted to the untrained eye, but contains additional notes written in invisible ink. He presents himself as neat and tidy, but his real scribblings are anything but

While inflicted with the Netherese Orb, his blood leaves rashes on other people wherever it touches. Not severe ones, but it doesn't feel pleasant. Like a mild sunburn

Quothe (the raven familiar) is his. It's named that because it loves to listen to Gale read literature (and occasionally recite lines where he leaves off)

He owns a fancy lanceboard set; it was a housewarming gift from his parents when he first got his tower

When he was little, he used to wear a ribbon as a headband to pull his hair back with, and a cape. His hair was fluffy and fell to his chin

His favorite color is blue, but he thinks he looks more refined in purple. His mother thinks he looks most dashing in red

His favorite hobby is helping Tara adapt spells with somatic components for tressym use

His first staff was a Sun Staff, gifted to him by Elminster

His most recent staff was a Staff of Power

Both of these, he had to consume. It was a very, very hard choice to make

Other things he's had to destroy that he cared for dearly:

Emerald Pen (left over from days at the academy; worse that it wasn't worth it, as it didn't give him more than a few hours)

Chromatic Rose (given by a lover upon breakup)

Duplicitous Manuscript (The Art of the Night is one of these)

Needle of Mending (kept it on his person after the thief incident)

Wand of Enemy Detection (carried it with him on excursions with Tara)

Wayfarer's Boots (his favorite travel pair)

Arcane Grimoire (one of his first found artifacts, copied a few spells from it into his own book)

Candle of Invocation (a gift from Mystra)

Crystal Ball of Telepathy (Tara used it more than he did; her little paws can't cast Sending)

Songbird Sage's Signet (wore it everywhere, only used in a pinch; he misses the weight of it and rubs his finger occasionally)

Crown of Whirling Comets (wore it to the Blackstaff annual balls, partly to show off)

The 6th level spell Program Illusion is what appears during his Death Protocol. As it needs to be tied to an area within 30 feet of where it's assigned, it's what his briefs are enchanted with. His reasoning is that he'd always have them, and no one would take them off him while dead

When he's panicked, he burns through the magical item he fed the Orb with faster. That's why he puts such a weight on keeping calm

The reason you have 2 days to resurrect him before exploding, and why he can still live for a bit if you don't give him an item immediately, is because without careful management, it consumes HIM. He has 2 days worth of magic to his person

He doesn't like to turn people down outright. To him, the gentlemanly thing to do is to go on a first date to indulge whomever asked. He's had a lot of first dates

He's been accused of using Enchantment as to why he's so dashing once or twice. It absolutely stoked his ego around his looks

Quipper fish and hundur sauce is the dish he's most proud of, but his favorite is a good slow roast

He'll make illusory ceilings for dates with starry skies and auroras. Maybe floating candles if he's feeling fancy. Yes that extends to the bedroom

If left to his own devices, he will relax in a bath for HOURS. Tara thinks he falls asleep in there (she can't prove anything)

Before the orb, he and his mother had a pseudo-competitive exchange of cookware. They'd take turns making the most ELABORATE dishes in the same fancy glass pan, and send it back and forth trying to outdo each other. Whenever one showed up with the pan, it would always be with a healthy seasoning of smug satisfaction and sweet compliments about the last meal

He likes picnics on the beach. If you show him shells and things he'll happily tell you where they came from

He always dresses just a smidge too warmly for the weather

He can sleep just about anywhere, and frequently does in his tower. It's not good for his back. When Tara finds him, she always tugs a blanket over him

His family symbol is a crescent moon setting in the water

Bonus Tara headcanon: her opal collar is her spellcasting focus

#bg3 #gale dekarios #gale of waterdeep #long post #headcanons #tara the tressym #real galeposting hours wooooooo

[aris-ink]

hi this is fear kink anon! 💘 sorry i forgot the member i wanted to choose 😭 but can it be with Jungkook?

baby you deserve a golden medal for your patience, tysm 💖 you said you liked psychological fics.... I tried

pairing: jungkook x reader

genre: forbidden romance, steb!siblings au

warnings: mentions of blood, allusions to stalking and violence (not towards the reader), pseudo incest, dub con, allusions to con noncon, dirty talk, degradation, fear kink, choking, mentions of pornographic content and impact play, obsession, manipulation, corruption, hints of dacryphilia

There were many different definitions of art; Jungkook found all of them inside your eyes. He liked to consider himself a good painter, and a few key concepts caught his attention as he worked on developing his skills.

Emotions. There was no point in art if it didn't inspire and make the heart tremble inside its cage. You were the greatest muse of all the raw, vibrant colors exploding behind his eyelids. The most common one always appeared in different shades of red. Something akin to rose petals when you touched him, igniting a fire deep in his abdomen. Something akin to crimson when he saw you with other men, dripping down his swollen knuckles late in the night after he dragged them into empty alleys.

Control. All strokes had to be precise to create the desired effect. And Jungkook found that just as he enjoyed holding the brushes, making them dance on the canvas in his own rhythm - he liked to do the same to you. His vision was his own; it belonged to no one but him. Like you. Every smile and shiver he induced was just as mesmerizing to him as every tear and flinch he caused. It didn't take much; just a little graze of his hand against your thigh, and you were already a beautiful mess of contradicting thoughts and emotions. Trying so hard to stay in line. He knew you too well; your body and soul responded to him in the softest and most primal ways at once, whether you liked it or not.

So why not test your limits? Why not see how much you could handle before you fell apart for him, returned to your barest, rawest form?

It was the only thing on his mind as he sat beside you on the couch, his arm thrown over your shoulder casually. You seemed restless, barely stopping yourself from grimacing at the movie playing on the tv screen. It was your only source of light in the darkness of the living room, providing you with little comfort.

"Jungkook," you sighed, "when are we gonna get to the good part? This movie sucks."

He chuckled.

"It gets better. Don't tell me you're scared already," he teased, tilting his head slightly.

His eyes flickered from the screen to your face fleetingly, noting a small frown forming on it.

"You know I don't like thrillers."

The pout on your lips made his heart flutter. He wanted to lean in and trace his fingertips over your cupid's bow, feel how soft your skin was. But all he did was tighten his arm around you.

"It's a good thing you've got a big brother to protect you, then," he hummed.

You let out a scoff that morphed into a quiet gasp when his hand landed on your thigh. He didn't turn his head in your direction, but he watched you carefully from the corner of his eye. He could see your lips fall open, your back straightening as if you were struck by lightning.

But you said nothing. All this time Jungkook has spent getting you used to being closer to him behind your parents' back was finally paying off. All the nights he took you out to watch horror movies with him, feeling your trembling hand on his chest as you sought protection and shelter in his arms - those were paying off too.

Sighing again, you tried to relax, release the tension in your muscles. In just a few beats, the screaming on the screen would stop and the scene would shift to a different setting, a wild chase through the woods that would no doubt have the hairs on your arms rising when you realized where it was going.

His free hand lifted to your hair, ringed fingers playing with the soft tips, brushing through the strands with a bruising tenderness. With each movement, he counted down the seconds, his sweats already feeling tight when he noticed an outline of trees on the darkening screen.

Three...

Two...

One.

He felt you stiffen in his hold all over again, your eyes widening. You were uncomfortable; it was written all over you, his proximity unnerving rather than consoling when the prey was caught.

Just like you were about to be. A little fly in the spider's web.

It was worse when the clothes started coming off. As though you just realized that the scene was not going to cut off, and perhaps you should have paid more attention to the movie's rating, you squirmed, flattening your palms against the couch.

"I- I think I'm gonna call it a night."

With a twitch of his mouth, Jungkook boldly placed both of his hands on your hips.

"That's not nice," he muttered, effortlessly pulling you up into his lap. "What about spending quality time together? As a family?"

You blinked, suddenly breathless, his thighs flexing under you, arms a cage of steel when you started panicking.

"Jungkook, I mean it! Stop being an asshole."

Your fists beat against his chest, but it didn't bother him at all. It just made him twitch in his pants. He brought his lips close to your ear, making you halt.

"We can finish watching the movie, or I can put on a different one from my personal collection. Your choice, baby."

He knew he didn't need to spell it out for you. You were a smart girl. Defeated, you meekly turned your eyes back towards the depravity on the screen.

"Can I please get back to my seat?" You whispered.

So easy to put into place. Jungkook ignored your request, focused on the way his cock was straining against his sweats, on how if you moved just an inch you'd be able to feel it. He brushed your hair behind your ear when the moaning started, lowering his voice as he spoke again.

"Do you like it?"

"No," you replied sulkily, though he could hear the nervousness making your tone waver. "This movie sucks."

Jungkook bit back a smile, lips pressing closer to your ear.

"I'm not talking about the movie, baby," he murmured. "Do you like the way he fucks her?"

You almost jumped, trying to turn your head towards him to no wonder ask him what the hell was wrong with him. But Jungkook was quicker, gripping your jaw tightly and keeping you still.

"Don't look away and answer my question like a good girl."

He could feel you begin to tremble, but the clenching of your thighs did not escape his attention, and neither did the hitch of your breath.

"This- this isn't funny anymore," you stammered out shakily. "Please, Jungkook."

He dug his fingers into your jaw.

"I'm starting to get angry, baby. Answer the question."

You winced, swallowing harshly, your chest rising unevenly as you tried to find your voice.

"No."

Jungkook clicked his tongue.

"My bad. Let me be more clear."

He dropped his free hand down to your thigh, skimming the inside of it with his fingers.

"Answer honestly, unless you want me to check myself."

The gasp you let out this time was louder, making his stomach simmer with heat. You were so cute; so small and defenseless in the arms of your biggest protector and nightmare all at once.

A sniffle followed. His lips chased the tear that rolled down your cheek.

"Come on, baby, why are you crying? Just tell me the truth. You know you can tell me anything, don't you?"

You bit down on your lower lip. It was fascinating, right down amusing to watch you struggle, trying to locate the courage to either face your inner self and burn with shame, or face the unknown consequences of his anger. The way you shook in his arms made his cock leak precum in excitement, staining his briefs. Every little part of you was his to love, use and control as he pleased. You could have tried to fight. You could have tried to scream. And yet you just sat there and let him tear you to pieces, and to Jungkook that was as much of a love confession as saying the three sacred words out loud.

"You can trust me, baby," he soothed in a whisper. "No one else will ever know. I promise."

You took a deep breath, sniffling once more before attempting to swallow the lump that formed in your throat, pushing the word out through its tight walls.

"Yes."

It was barely a whisper. Light as a feather and yet heavy with the pain it took to pluck it. Jungkook pressed a kiss into your cheek, releasing your jaw from his hold to wrap his arms around your fragile frame again, keep all the scattered pieces of you together.

"Good girl," he whispered, too, his piercing cool against your heated skin, lips brushing across your aching jaw.

With a deep, pleased hum, he began to rub soothing circles into your hand, trying to steady it in his warmth.

"Did it make you wet?" He questioned lowly. "Telling me you liked it."

"Jungkook," you whimpered his name, as though hoping to appeal to his common sense. Or to the softer side of him you were used to. "You're scaring me."

"I know," he pressed the next kiss into your neck, gentle and teasing. "Does that make you wet, too?"

No answer.

Gotcha.

Jungkook slid his palms down your legs, prying them open forcefully, his jaw set tight when you tried to protest, nails digging into your sensitive skin.

"Stop fucking squirming," he hissed. "I am so tired of this little attitude. I will drag you to my room and tie you to the bed if you don't fucking behave."

A visible shiver ran through you, causing him to groan.

"Oh yeah, I know you'd fucking like that."

He flipped you onto the couch like you weighed nothing, instantly trapping you under the heat of his body. Being able to finally look into your eyes was exhilarating, your pupils wide, the fright in them a burning, living flame that made his stiff cock ache.

Gently, he brought an inked hand down to your face and pressed your cheek into the couch, steering your eyes back to the screen.

"Look. Look and tell me you haven't been rubbing that little clit and dreaming I could fuck you like this."

The little shallow breaths leaving you made his gaze fall down to your chest, the swell of your breasts visible through the low neckline of your shirt. He could feel his own pulse racing, his hand more rough than intended when it enveloped your neck.

"Come on, tell me I'm wrong, baby. Tell me you never made yourself come wishing I'd pin you down and give it to you good."

He leaned down, his hot breath fanning across your face.

You still didn't say a word. Moonstruck. That was how he felt. He needed to make you his more than he needed to breathe.

"Well?" He taunted, choking you harder. "Prove me wrong. Tell me you don't want me to slap you around and fuck you like a little whore, ignore your fucking whining and stuff you full of cum. Say it, baby."

All that left your throat was a weak, breathy whimper that made him want to bury himself inside you and wreck your tight, little cunt until your eyes rolled back and your throat ached from screaming.

But - there was no space for impatience in art. He released your neck in favor of slipping his hand in between your legs, pressing his fingers right into your panties.

A strained grunt slipped through his teeth when he felt the sticky, wet spot on them, your thighs flinching at the contact.

"Fuck."

You avoided his eyes, even though he could feel you seeking more of his touch, hips rolling subtly, chest trembling with each breath you took. He pressed his thumb into your clothed clit, for no more than a moment before he pulled his hand away entirely.

Although you tried to catch his wrist to stop him and get him back to where you needed him, you didn't complain. Like you were too terrified to speak, whether it was because of him or because of your own desires. Most likely both.

Cooing, he kissed your soft cheek.

"Now, there, you know how to be good when you want to, don't you?"

Cupping your face, he made you look back at him, staring right into your eyes when he closed the distance between you.

And yet, all he gave you was a ghost of a kiss, a touch that was barely there. It still made his heart thrum and his cock jump in his sweats.

"I'm gonna take care of you, baby," he breathed into your lips. "I'm gonna make all your dreams come true. I'll catch you someday when you're walking home and drag you into some filthy alley. And you can scream and cry and pretend you don't like it all you want if that makes you feel better about being a messed up, little slut. I hope you cry a lot."

A shiver ran up his spine at the soft sound that reached his ears. A moan. Short, quiet, shaky, full of mortification, but it was there.

The next sound was more familiar, a reminder of the constant ticking of the clock. A car pulling up into the driveway. Your parents were back.

Jungkook nudged your nose with his.

"Watch your back, little angel. I always know where you are."

With that, he pushed himself up and got off the couch, adjusting his sweats. He didn't spare you a glance, leaving you to scramble and try to gather yourself as the keys jingled on the other side of the door, shaky fingers trying to reach the remote to turn off the tv.

Jungkook had a problem of his own to solve for the night. He needed a long, cold shower.

And then just a little more patience. Patience made all the difference in art.

💌 taglist: @wonyuknow @baalsgurl1913 @imnotlauriane @bucketofhiros @osakis-gf @silv3rswirls

#don't ask bc i don't know #jungkook x reader #yandere bts #bts x reader #bts imagines #bts scenarios #bts reactions #bts smut

[hamliet]

What do you think about the romance in titanic?

It's truly great. Titanic is a good story and a good movie. I would actually recommend Lindsay Ellis' video on it.

But as for my thoughts...

The romance itself is a little alchemical, at least in terms of their names. Rose DeWitt-Bukator: Rose=red, symbol of the stone and red stage; DeWitt="of white," or the white stage. Rose is the philosopher's stone. Jack Dawson: reference to jackdaws, a symbol of the black stage). Which makes sense since James Cameron pitched it as Romeo and Juliet on the Titanic, and Romeo and Juliet is mega alchemical. (Also Cameron captured the spirit of Romeo and Juliet far better than most. It's hopeful!)

Jack and Rose aren't the most complex characters to grace the screen, but they don't have to be to be compelling (and they don't pretend to be more than they are, either). Their struggles are timeless and complementary, which helps them resonate with audiences around the world and across cultures.

Jack wants a better life, but he wants a better life for those around him, too. His joy and way of finding beauty in everything around him is contagious. He might have "nothing in [his] pocket" to offer, but he still finds moments of cheering about being the "king of the world" at the bow with Fabrizio, makes friends with those around him, plays with kids like Cora, and is fundamentally... kind. He saves a distraught woman from ending her life and didn't even defend himself when he was accused of attacking her. He captures his joy of life in his art, drawing what he sees as beautiful.

Rose wants a better life, just like Jack, but instead of being determined to live her best life where she's at, whatever she has or doesn't have, she has no freedom. Instead of being contagious in joy to where she draws others in like Jack, Rose must instead withdraw to survive. She can't trust anyone around her because they're all counting on her to save them (her mother wants Rose to save them from financial ruin, her fiancé wants Rose as arm candy). But Rose is seventeen. Jack's kindness to her inspires her to save him when he's accused of attacking her, and his love for life and for her just--they give Rose hope.

Is there anything more hopeful than seeing someone else truly alive?

Of course, then Jack dies saving Rose. And no, he could not have fit on the wood and also when water's that cold your limbs do not work perfectly so they could only make so many attempts to get on the wood in the first place, and yes if she'd stayed on the lifeboat he may have lived. but--that's not the point of the story. Rose is a seventeen year old girl who is tired of having people value her life as only what she can give them. Even Cal saving her by getting her on a lifeboat has nothing to do with Rose living and everything to do with her surviving to benefit him, not Rose.

Rose jumping off that lifeboat is her choice to live, even if it means she'll die.

It's a powerful choice, and people who nitpick or act like an abused, suicidal 17 year old facing trauma would think rationally are just... idk killjoys. Go watch Batman vs Superman or whatever pseudo-noir pretentious drivel tickles your fancy instead.

Anyways. So this motif of life coming from death is again, alchemy! It's a romantic tragedy, because even though Jack dies... there is life that comes from his sacrifice. Rose does live, physically as well as emotionally and spiritually. Even when she "dies" in the end, it's left ambiguous as a deliberate question--is she dying or dreaming? Does it matter, when the point is the same--that she's alive and Jack is alive and they are all together, whether in the afterlife or her dream?

#ask hamliet #titanic #titanic meta #titanic 1997 #rose dewitt bukater #jack dawson #rose x jack

[doomdoomofdoom]

Since it keeps getting brought up together with Nimona (which is currently free on YouTube and you should watch it a thousand times), I decided to watch Disneys Wish and,,,

I mean it's not an awful movie. I'm on the fence whether I'd call it bad, but it definitely is inadequate.

The movie refuses to commit to anything. The animation style is caught between storybook and refusal to let go of their 3D formula. The story has several beats it could play off really strongly, but refuses to engage with: The kingdom can't decide if it's a fascist state or a free land under a kinda wack dude. It can't even decide if the people there are happy or not. The dissonance in language is ridiculous, especially within the songs. Your villain song by the medieval king sorcerer should not start with "Peep the name" or randomly talk about genetics?? (I'm pretty sure they only included this so they could make a vague joke about his ass, since the line is "I got these genes from outer space", with "genes" sounding the same as "jeans" - which also have no place in the setting.) I don't think anything could have prepared me for the sucker punch that is a bunch of woodland creatures singing about being shareholders.

I also feel like the audio mixing during the songs is off, I think it's because it doesn't account for atmosphere and the acoustics of its locations, but I do not have a good audio brain. Someone else is more qualified for that.

There's a bunch of cinema sins level criticisms I could make about the story, like "why doesnt anyone outisde the kingdom learn magic" or "mathematically it makes no sense to assume every wish would be granted", but I think that goes against good faith criticism.

The movie also has a huge problem with showing vs telling. We have two characters dedicated to hyping up how much Asha cares for everyone, and within the movie she acts pretty much opposite to that claim. Similarly, we're told that the king clearly rose to this power and status by being so cool and charismatic, but every time he opens his mouth he sounds like a pseudo-intellectual twitter thread.

And don't get me started on the whole self-references thing. I'm normally fond of easter eggs like that, but these just shatter immersion into little pieces. There's a scene where the villain just describes the plots of three different Disney movies. Instead of giving the protagonist a distinct outfit, she spends half the movie wearing the Fairy Godmother's cloak. The entire movie's premise is just "When You Wish Upon A Star".

I do like the attempt at diversity, Asha's best friend using a crutch to get around is never pointed out as unusual and her friend group is presumably diverse in character and race. Unfortunately, I can only name two of them. I can't even tell you how many people the group consists of, that's how undefined they are.

I don't like shitting on a piece of media/art because even if it was created by a shitty greedy garbage studio to hit their ridiculous release schedule, there are always genuinely passionate artists involved in the production. It's a shame they didn't get to shine in this mediocre disappointment.

Anyway, go watch Nimona.

#ramble #wish #disney #disney wish #nimona #go watch nimona #animated movies #movie critique #also yes you can make this movie about being trans and i will prove it

[300iqprower]

HRU Preview: EMIYA (Assassin)

New Passives:

“Zero-Sum Legacy” - Significantly increase Base NP Gain when attacking [Living Human] enemies. - Change class multiplier from 0.9x to 1.05x when attacking [Magus] enemies. - - Change all enemy class multipliers to 1.05x when this unit is attacked. [Demerit] - Increase Overcharge Level for all other [Emiya] allies by 1 (2 times) when this unit enters the field (Includes Backline). - - Inflict Disastrous Curse (100%, Unremovable) to self for each other [Emiya] ally (Includes Backline). [Demerit]

“Unshakable Among Death” While this unit is affected by Instant Kill Immune or Debuff Immune: - Immune to Seal effects cast by [Human or Star attribute] enemies. - Immune to Buff Removal effects cast by [Human or Earth attribute] enemies. ((If affected by Debuff Immune charges, effects that remove buffs or apply seals will use an immunity charge as if normal debuffs))

Magecraft B -> Mage Killer A++

Increase own Arts Card effectiveness (3 times, 3 turns^). Apply Special ATK [Magus] to self (3 turns). [35-85%] Apply Trait Change to self: - Negate Class disadvantages (Offensive) from [Caster] class enemies (3 turns). - Negate Class disadvantages (Defensive) from [Caster and Alter Ego] class enemies (3 times).

Scapegoat C -> Mercenary Tactics C-

Gain Critical Stars. Apply Target Focus to an ally (1 turn). Decrease Critical Star Gather Rate for an ally by 100% (1 turn). If selected ally is [Human attribute or Pseudo-Servant]: - Inflict Skill Seal on one enemy (1 turn). - Inflict NP Seal [Unremovable] on selected ally (1 turn). [Demerit] [Reduce cooldown by 1 to 6/5/4]

Chronos Rose B+ -> B+++

Deal significant damage to a single enemy that ignores DEF. Decrease Charge for a single enemy. Chance to further decrease Charge by 1 against [Living Human or Magus] enemies. If Break is triggered on [Living Human] servant, apply Magic Seal to them (1 time, 2 turns). If attack deals lethal damage to a [Human attribute or trait], reduce one of this unit’s skill cooldowns by 1 turn (selected randomly from all on-cooldown skills). <Overcharge> Decrease Critical Rate for a single enemy (4^ turns).^ Decrease Attack for a single [Human attribute or trait] enemy (1 turn).  [ATK down scales at 30/40/50/60/70%. Crit down slightly buffed to 15/25/35/45/55%. Chance to further reduce charge scales with level at 30/50/60/65/70%.]

EX Rankup:

Affection of the Holy Grail A+ -> Affection of the Grail EX-

Apply Ignore Invincible for yourself (3 turns). Increase your Critical Strength (3 turns). If there is a [Holy Grail] ally: Increase own Healing Effectiveness (3 turns). If there is a [Greater Grail] ally: Apply Debuff Immune to self (1 time, 3 turns). If there is a [Black Grail] ally: Apply Instant-Death Immune to self (5 times, 3 turns). If there is another [Lesser Grail] ally: Increase own Buff Received Success Rate (3 turns). Decrease Debuff Resist for all non [Grail] allies (except yourself) by 20% (3 turns). [Demerit]^ After 3 turns: Inflict Curse to all [Grail] allies (100, 5 turns). [Demerit]

((thanks to @lightheaded-dullahan for helping!))

#i didnt give servant lists for new traits because they're all still WIP #fgo #fate grand order #fate zero #emiya kiritsugu #fate kerry #emiya assassin #fgo meta #hru preview #hypothetical rank ups

[shadamyheadcanons]

hi!! so i’ve watched all of shadow and amy’s canon in game interactions (which are very cute, he honestly treats her so much differently than the others ?? like he’s def in love) and, it made me wonder, is there any interactions in the comics between the two that are like, cute?? i dunno LOL. i just crave more semi-canon shadamy. whenever i try to search it just shows me fan-made comics

I don’t know the comics super well, but I do sometimes track down an issue or two if I know Shadow and Amy are in it. Archie has this cool spin-off series called Sonic Universe that tells the stories that go on in the background that Sonic isn’t there for. I love it because it lets other characters--Amy, Shadow, Blaze, Knuckles, you name it--shine. I love Sonic himself, but there are certain dynamics you just can’t see when he’s around, particularly with Amy because he draws so much of her attention. When Sonic’s not around, though, Amy immediately makes a beeline for Shadow. She consistently seeks him out just as she does in the games, and that sticks out to me.

The one I always recommend first is the Treasure Team Tango arc.

It’s Sonic Universe issues 21-24. It’s the shippiest one I’ve found and features Amy playing the role of Shadow’s moral compass just as she did in SA2. In it, Amy leads a pseudo Team Rose--Blaze, Cream, and herself--in search of a Sol Emerald. Team Dark is in pursuit of it, too, and it’s up to Amy to make Shadow see the light and let Blaze have the Emerald her world so desperately needs. Amy and Shadow are at their peak. Blaze is awesome and perfectly in character. Cream and Cheese are adorable as always. Omega is at his funniest for a few reasons I won’t spoil. Unfortunately, Rouge isn’t written very well here, but other than that, the characters, plot, humor, and art are all on-point.

It also has Bean.

I like Bean.

To read it, click here.

Another one I’d recommend is the Shattered arc. It runs from issues 87 to 90, also from the Sonic Universe collection. Amy and Knuckles work with Team Dark to find some Master Emerald shards. It’s not as shippy as the other one, but Amy seeks Shadow out once again, and the two of them do get to squeeze in some childish teasing at the beginning.

Cute. How many characters can make Shadow pout like that? They fight well together later on, too.

This story focuses more on the strained relations between Shadow and Knuckles. Rouge acts as a mediator and tries to get them to play nice, and you can easily read it as “I just want my best friend and my boyfriend to get along for, like, ten minutes.”

Well...I read it that way, at least. Don’t know about anyone else. Rouge also makes peace with Amy here. These things are necessary for any future Knuxouge/Shadamy double dates, y’know?

It’s got good platonic interactions between Shadow and Knuckles, who have more in common than they’d like to admit. Omega is hilarious again. Rouge is a good friend this time around, which is exactly the kind of Rouge I like to see. The end has a really heartwarming conversation between Knuckles and Amy, too.

Not much Shadamy, but still worth a read. Here’s the link.

That’s all I know about for Archie.

IDW has one or two interactions, but Sega’s put such strict mandates on Shadow’s portrayal that Ian Flynn doesn’t like writing him in IDW, so he doesn’t include Shadow often. It’s a damn shame, too, because IDW Amy is great. Love her.

I’m still only 8 issues in. I do know of a couple panels where they show up together later, though I don’t know the context. First off, she almost runs him over at the start of issue #33:

To an outsider, Rouge seems like she’s being sarcastic, but...no. This really IS nice for IDW Shadow, especially considering Amy almost ran him over. He’d snap at most people for that. Notice how he’s civil to Amy but doesn’t even acknowledge Rouge, who’s supposed to be his...*checks notes*...best friend. And she doesn’t seem surprised. Yeah, we’ve fallen pretty far from Archie Shadow:

(To be clear, I photoshopped Amy in there. She fits pretty well, though, doesn’t she?)

Ian Flynn clearly knows how to write this guy, so I don’t know why Sega won’t let him do his thing. I’m still holding out hope that the third movie will nail Shadow’s character the way the second one did for Knuckles. Maybe then Sega could see the value of a more nuanced Shadow. It could happen, right?

The only other bit I know is this panel from issue #36:

I mean...I’m not quite in the camp of “Shadow is definitely in love with Amy” yet, but...if he’s not jealous, then what is this reaction? ;)

#shadamy #shadow the hedgehog #amy rose #sonic the hedgehog #ask #not a headcanon #archie sonic #treasure team tango #idw sonic

[pseudo-art-rose]

it's time to bloom again

#pseudo #art #rose #pseudo-art-rose #vo5uru #abstract #contemporaryabstract #print #poster #colorophilia #artists on tumblr #artistsoninstagram

[triptychgardener]

I have been having more calliope and caliborn feels, and thus you get another episode of Alice Rambles

So, a lot of homestuck is about one's role in the narrative, and either escaping it, or embracing it (and not in the lame, way too on the nose way the epilogues did it). Like, Rose fights so hard against the game, but still ends up falling into the knowledge-cursed seer archetype. Dave, despite a lot of growth, never really escapes the ironic coolguy persona, but some of that might be by choice.

Given their role as fandom pseudo-standins, the cherubs seem keenly aware of their roles in the story, and neither of them like it.

Like, Calliope knows she's supposed to die. Her dying is the ultimate act of passive creation, which kicks off the whole story. And she *hates* that. she wants friends! she wants to see the world! and she gets that! she manages to fulfill her role and still get what she wants, having her cake and eating it too.

Alt!Calliope is a version of her that tries to get her happy ending by defying her role, which doesn't end too well for her.

then there's Caliborn. He's the big bad, the ultimate evil, the final boss. He knows that, and he doesn't mind it, but i don't think his hearts really in it. He says so himself that his art is what her finds purpose in, and destroying the universe is just a hobby.

But he doesn't get to escape, he's stuck in his role. He's already here after all, so there's no escaping his role as the mad destroyer. No more art, no more trolling the alphas, no more excited kid who wants to show off his stop motion claymation.

I really wish we got to see an alt!caliborn, maybe a version of him that got a chance to mellow out, to really put himself into his art without the weight of narrative destiny.

I've said it before, and I'll say it again, Caliborn is just a kid. He's got so much depth, so much potential! I could write a massive story about him breaking out of his assigned role (ironically the ultimate act of destruction, stopping the story before it even starts). Maybe i will someday

Alt-Caliborn is a concept I've had a LOT of thoughts on, and is a concept I want to work with later on. Specifically a lonelier, scared version of Caliborn, the one killed by his sister. I will say that I think Alt-Calliope (at least in HS proper) is a perfect example of Callie taking her speculation to the end of the line: one who has fully accepted what she thinks she knows about her aspect, and therefore resigns herself to her fate. Even her "activeness" in the Epilogues is just an extension of her trying to be this powerful Muse figure. I see a version of Caliborn who is... still kind of Caliborn, but is less antisocial (in the sociology sense of the word.) Believe it or not, that's the Caliborn who I imagined in my Yaoi Mines comic.

#asks #alice-hastur #meta #callie #caliborn

[theanoninyourinbox]

Great! Can I please get art that's a fusion of Hisuian Zoroark from Pokemon Legends Arceus and Chien Pao from Pokemon Scarlet and Violet? They both look very cool and I will like to see your take on them!

-rubs hands together- Ohoho I was really excited about this one! It was difficult - I wasn’t too sure how to combine the wildly different body shapes without looking like a sports mascot or a very complicated fursuit - but I’m happy with what I came up with.

This Pokémon would be the remnant of an older species that was hunted to extinction - a normal type with incredible soft fur and little self preservation. Its ghost rose under the northern lights, still all soft fur, but now a vicious hunter, toying with its prey under the shimmering curtains of the Borealis. The last thing a poacher will see is a pair of old skinning daggers descending in a flurry of snow…

It would definitely be a pseudo legendary, and would live in the high mountains, haunting the cabins where its previous forms were turned into fur coats and hats. Would require VERY high friendship, if not max, to evolve from Sad Catfox into Death From Above Leopard. I hope you enjoy Glitter!

#My art #ask answered #art request #pokemon #pokémon #fake pokemon #pokemon fusion #Zoroark #hisuian zoroark #chien-pao #chien pao #Zorua #bonus zorua #my art

[hauntedfalcon]

thinking about how my husband lamented that Rings of Power doesn't do much with the Valar. thinking about how the Queen of Numenor says faith is a thin thread to hang a nation from, which runs counter to... most of recorded human history, not to mention Tolkien's works, where multiple nations of men awaited their True King to deliver them into a golden age, and Boromir's declaration that "Gondor needs no king" signified faithlessness and that was a negative thing. thinking about how there are articles out there to explain why Galadriel was upset in Rings of Power, to explain that she turned her back on elf heaven, on the selfsame far green country with whose description Gandalf moved us all to tears in Return of the King, and she chose ruin and the world

thinking yet again about how Cersei Lannister blows up a whole church because the Sparrows had become more influential than the crown, and a handful of episodes later she says "hey smallfolk, come into the castle keep to stay safe from this battle" and the smallfolk... do it, instead of saying "fuck no, that's the lady with the wildfire who killed our beloved priests and committed the worst possible blasphemies, and this matters to us because we are peasants and the only thing in our lives is work and religion" and there were no further repercussions because apparently the influential state religion of Westeros was one building and a cool catchphrase

thinking about Tess of the Road, which I almost did not finish because wow it's grueling to be a woman in a fantasy novel isn't it? thinking about the spiritual epiphany it grants its title character in the midst of a kneejerk "Catholicism but even more oppressive" setting because it reads easily I guess (see also all the Dragon Age games). still haven't unpacked all my thoughts from that one tbh but it's rolling around in there and it will be for a while

thinking about how almost nobody wants to write characters who have relationships with their gods, even in fantasy, a genre where characters could have very literal relationships with their gods, be they adversarial or positive or realistically messy. thinking about how writers seem not to want to touch that, either because it's too messy or because of an impression that society is beyond that. thinking about how this extends beyond the fantasy genre. thinking about how sterile Station Eleven's post-apocalypse felt and how part of that was a lack of folk practices or any spiritualism apart from the antagonist's obviously bad oppressive pseudo-Christianity. thinking about Anne McCaffrey insisting there is no religion on Pern in the far future, versus, like, everything about Deep Space Nine. thinking about how Battlestar Galactica felt ballsy as fuck for having monotheistic Cylons and polytheistic humans, but in the end that thread and the implications of robots worshiping a god just... never went anywhere

thinking about how, when religion is included in a work of fiction, it’s almost always with a wink wink, nudge nudge, you know and I know how backward and bogus this is, but it’s almost never played straight, much less validated in the narrative (I love you Netflix’s Shadow and Bone). and when it is portrayed as a positive influence in people's lives, it's in the vaguest, always culturally-Christian, terms of "light" and "darkness" and "hope". thinking about how Midnight Mass told a story about people who took so much comfort in their religion that even after it turned them into vampires and destroyed their community they sang hymns as the sun rose, and how that was such a foreign thing that a lot of the audience found it unbelievable

thinking about the extra layer of hypocrisy in defending a work of fantasy by saying "it was just like that back then" when a) there was no back then because it's fantasy, and b) the work in question ignores the foundational role religion played throughout the medieval Europe all these fantasy worlds use as a template

thinking about how art is meant to nurture the soul, but increasingly neglects to grant one to its characters

thinking about how if we can't imagine a world where people have a spiritual life that isn't just a tool of oppression, how can we create one

thinking about how much I love the Queen's Thief series and Arthdal Chronicles

#thinking (as ever) that I really like the idea of the fantasy genre but not the reality of it #thinking increasingly that I want to write an apotheosis :) #this post is unrebloggable so Catholic Tumblr™️ doesn't get ahold of it. replies are welcome #and to be absolutely clear here: if there is a point or an appeal in this ramble #it is not for better representation of fantasy!Catholicism. enough of that. we're full up. #the appeal is for more religion/actual spiritual practices in fantasy. of all kinds! ones that are made up wholecloth! #it's FANTASY. let's IMAGINE STUFF #The Rings of Power for ts #long post for ts

[powerpolyculeshowdown]

listen I am THEE leverage ot3 enthusiast (I’m literally am @leverage-ot3) but I absolutely support the tardis ot3 as a worthy opponent!!!

I love jack, rose, and the doctor so so much and they deserve all the happiness! they were iconic for doing that in 2005 when gay marriage wasn’t legalized and homophobia was running rampant. they were very brave to do that move and they could have written it off as some funny moment but they made it really sincere and beautiful!!! jack is from 3000 (?) years in the future and he legit doesn’t care about gender or species or whatever, he just had feelings for them and Went For It and I respect him so much for that

leverage came out in 2008-2012 and they never had the three of them kiss, but they had some VERY poly feeling moments and the cast made references to the three of them being together in the gag reel since s2 (2009!!!). this is debatable but I consider leverage to be the more serious show and the fact that they slid those references in during a time when gay marriage wasn’t legal and only recently decriminalized (and poly relationships were out of the question, tbh) I really respect them for that. they were word of god canon as of the creator tweeting about them after the finale when the third of the trio basically made wedding vows to the other two (that were in a relationship with each other)

also in the new revival series they have a canon ace masc lesbian!!! and although they went back on the ot3 a bit with the third character dating and separate from the other two, s1 ended with the two that art together repeating the pseudo wedding vows and saying that they made robot bodies for the three of them so that they could be together forever (fucking ICONIC???!!!)

anyways this is a propaganda post for both ships because I love them dearly and they both deserve love

(I am still a leverage ot3 stan first and jacktenrose second, but still they both deserve love)

sorry im getting to these late i was eating lunch aaaaa idem who won the finished polls yet but any propaganda can still work for revival round!

#ppspropaganda

[bedtimestoriesforbrokengirls]

The Daily Dad

Things you might want to know, for Jun 27, 2023:

90 Day The Last Resort: TLC Threatens New “All Stars” Relationship Therapy — So I’m obviously going to watch this. That’s a given. But nothing short of a full personality transplant is gonna help Angela.

The indictment of misogynist influencer Andrew Tate, explained

“Stunning”—Midjourney update wows AI artists with camera-like feature — I’m not sure “stunning” is the best way to describe a generative AI getting moderately better at what it already does.

How to bring back the small-town family doctor — There are definite downsides to the small town doctor, but those downsides aren’t addressed by a complete absence of said doctors.

NASA is recycling 98 percent of astronaut pee and sweat on the ISS into drinkable water — I haven’t got my girls running that efficiently, but we’ll get there… we’ll get there.

'The Elder Scrolls VI' is 'likely five-plus years away,' says Xbox chief — I was in my mid-thirties for Oblivion, and in my early 40s for Skyrim. Now it looks like I’ll be pushing 60 before I get my hands on Elder Scrolls VI.

YouTube fan accounts will soon need a disclosure in the channel name or handle — I feel like this is an unusually reasonable policy decision, given we’re talking about YouTube.

The limits of therapy-speak — It’s not just therapy-speak. It’s academic jargon and terms-of-art, too. The internet has triggered an intellectual mutation that leaves us all dressing our communication up in pseudo-professional drag.

Microsoft acquired Bethesda after hearing Starfield would be exclusive to PlayStation — I love that Microsoft is essentially dumping out its purse in the fight to acquire Activision… every embarrassing failure and dangerous near-miss they’ve endured over the last ten years is being floated as a justification for the purchase.

Liz Phair Predicted the F-ckboy — and Ripped Them to Shreds

An SF brothel had a secret: CIA agents watching from behind a mirror — Most conspiratorial bullshit is bullshit because large-scale conspiracies require large-scale deception, and there’s always a disgruntled non-believer ready to rat out the system. But the little stuff? Small projects, run quietly with modest teams? Yeah, that’s the kind of thing you can get away with for years.

Inside the psychotherapeutic sex cult of the Upper West Side — This one is new to me.

When you can’t separate art from artist — People who can’t see others as three-dimensional individuals who can do great things and awful things in a single lifetime have clearly never had a loved-one who is a drunk or a criminal.

Deepfake Porn Reveals a ‘Pervert’s Dilemma'

Samuel L. Jackson Is 'Still Trying to Figure Out' Why He's Never Been in a 'Black Panther' Movie — It’s a rather excellent question, really. I’m guessing it’s a budget thing, since Sam Jackson always delivers the goods if you give him a half-decent script.

Satisfyer Pro 2 Gen 3 Review: Starter Pleasure

Marvel Studios Defends 'Secret Invasion’s Cringey AI Opening Titles — I don’t get it. It’s a title sequence. They created it with the help of an AI app instead of After Effects. The hand-wringing is ridiculous, and I think the sequence does what it sets out to do.

Vision Pro will turn any surface into a display with touch control

I love baring all for sex scenes & here's why, says The Idol star Lily-Rose Depp — “And I love you, Lily,” says Mr. B.

#news

[friendly-rat-king]

2023 Books

In October I decided to start writing short tumblr posts in response to each book I read. Did I follow through with this decision? Absolutely not! Here's a half-assed list of books I read in 2023, assembled way after the fact:

Fingersmith by Sarah Waters (4/5)

I enjoyed comparing/contrasting it with The Handmaiden (aka Park Chan-wook's 2016 film adaptation, which shifts the setting from Dickensian England to Japanese-ruled Korea and dramatically changes the ending). As with The Handmaiden, which I watched first, I feel like if I cut the story into pieces and Frankenstein-ed it together into two separate stories, I would end up with one of my favorite books and one of my least favorite books.

Why I read it: in the process of reading Sarah Waters' entire bibliography.

2. Bunny by Mona Awad (2/5)

This book sucked, BUT there was a really funny scene about 1/3 of the way in where the narrator's high school crush inexplicably shows up and dances with her. It might be worth reading just for that scene (you can stop reading immediately afterwards).

If a book is supposed to be a satire about wealthy women attending graduate school, its not a great sign when it seems like the author has never met a rich person, a woman, or a graduate student. This is even stranger because the author, a woman, attended an Ivy and got a graduate degree in creative writing. I'd love to read the book this is trying to be, but this isn't it.

Why I read it: my sister-in-law recommended it to me specifically (yikes) and I felt obligated to finish it.

3. Infamous by Lex Croucher (5/5)

In the summer of 1816, 18-year-old Mary Shelley famously stayed at the Lake Geneva villa of noted jackass Lord Byron. Trapped inside by shitty weather, Byron's guests competed to see who could write the best ghost story (the winning entry was, of course, "Frankenstein"). Lex Croucher obviously thought this setting in itself was a great book premise, and was absolutely correct.

I was expecting the basic shape of this novel after reading the back cover, and my assumptions about the plot were basically correct. I was NOT expecting even the most minor characters to feel three-dimensional and complicated or to be hit so hard by - well, I can't tell you without spoiling it, but three different conflictto s that are simultaneously of their time and cut very, very close to home. I also wasn't expecting to laugh as hard as I did.

Why I read it: people on my dash kept recommending Gwen & Art Are Not In Love but I didn't want to read YA.

4. The Name of the Rose by Umberto Eco (4/5)

It took me forever to finish this one because I kept finding myself pausing to design a digital glossary to accompany the book. What if, as you read through the description of the garden, the glossary's map of the monastery was suddenly filled in with all of the herbs mentioned, and as you hovered over each illustration (drawn in a pseudo-medieval style, of course) you could learn about the purported and actual properties of each herb? What if I illustrated the intricately carved portal and thoroughly researched the symbolism and history behind each of its components?

Anyway, I was lukewarm enough about the actual ending that I gave up on the project. It would probably be impossible for any ending to live up to a beginning this ambitious, to be fair.

Why I read it: I read that it was an inspiration for Pentiment (a game I still haven't finished, oops).

5. The Bell by Iris Murdoch (4/5)

I might try reading this one again -- there was obviously a ton of cool symbolic symmetry going on that I never quite got the significance of. What I did enjoy was Dora's POV. There's this really wonderful scene near the beginning where Dora spends several paragraphs internally justifying why she shouldn't give up her seat on the train for an old woman. Then, the moment the old woman asks, she impulsively gives up the seat without even thinking of it. Dora spends the rest of the story stumbling haphazardly between moments of grace, never quite aware of why she does any of the things she does, in a way that's simultaneously alien and yet completely plausible.

Why I read it: @conven1encestorewoman mentioned it was one of her favorite books.

6. Either/Or by Elif Batuman (5/5)

I would read anything she wrote. Fingers crossed she makes this into a four-part series.

Why I read it: I loved The Idiot. (Shout-out to @a-rhombus to loaning me her copy.)

7 + 8. A Free Man of Color & Fever Season by Barbara Hambly (5/5)

The book that made me love murder mysteries. The author obviously did a ton of research on 1830's New Orleans and I do love great historical fiction, but what really made it shine was that the "red herrings" weren't dead ends -- each one was essential to the themes of the novel. Highly recommend.

Why I read it: I think @sea-changed mentioned that it was good, I added it to my library queue, and then didn't think about it again until I was notified it was ready to checkout.

9. Tender is the Flesh by Agustina Bazterrica (2/5)

Mehhhhh. All (attempts at) shock, very little substance.

Why I read it: my baby sister recommended it.

10. Geek Love by Katherin Dunn (5/5)

"Geek" as in "circus geek," a performed who bites the heads off of live chickens. Tender is the Flesh fuckin wishes it had what Geek Love has. (I have reached the point in this post where I realize I'm not even at the halfway mark and decide to hurry up -- sorry Geek Love, you deserved better.)

Why I read it: @mylestoyne mentioned there were some cool parallels to The Tempest and I decided to check it out.

11. The Haunting of Hill House by Shirley Jackson (5/5)

Absolutely lived up to the hype.

Why I read it: the hype.

12. The Turn of the Screw by Henry James (4/5)

The rare book I consumed in audiobook format -- reading James' prose was very difficult for me, and filtering it through an actor helped. I don't know that I enjoyed the process of listening to it, but I really enjoyed thinking about it afterwards.

Why I read it: the prologue of The Haunting of Hill House name-dropped it.

13. The Tempest by William Shakespeare (3/5)

Look, I bumped it up to 3 stars because I felt like I couldn't give Shakespeare anything lower than a 3-star rating, but I really disliked this. Part of is is that I was already familiar with the highlights, and putting them in context diminished them. Ariel's song is way less interesting when you know for a fact that the man supposedly undergoing a sea-change is completely fine; Prospero's final monologue feels less like it's tying together broader themes and more like Shakespeare thought it would be cool to break the fourth wall at the last minute.

Idk, maybe I'm just an idiot. I immediately sought out a series of lectures on youtube about the play + texted people I know who love this play to elaborate on their opinions so they could correct my incorrect opinion, but so far, no dice.

Why I read it: because of the Geek Love parallels.

14. What the Dog Saw by Malcolm Gladwell (2/5)

Bad, as previously discussed.

Why I read it: someone at by brother's wedding said the essay on ketchup was worth reading (it wasn't).

15. A Wizard of Earthsea by Ursula K Le Guin (4.5/5)

Why I read it: because I wanted to read the sequel.

16. Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor E Frankl (4/5)

Discussed previously.

17. A Gentleman in Moscow by Amor Towles (4/5)

(Already reviewed this on Goodreads so I can just copy-paste, hurray!) An enjoyable read. The pacing was great, the scene composition reminded me of a Wes Anderson film, and the footnotes were a very effective way of shifting the POV from third person limited to omniscient and back again. I checked the author's Wikipedia page midway through and was unsurprised to learn that he is an investment banker from New York; after all, the villain is the only character who refers to Rostov as "Comrade" (everyone else continues to deferentially call him "the Count") and he doesn't even know his wine pairings! The idyllic representation of pre-revolutionary Russia partially undermines the author's ability to convey the horrors of Soviet Russia. That being said, the tone of the novel is mostly light, and I was able to have fun in spite of this.

Why I read it: my older sister mentioned it was the last book she tried to read before she had kids and they took over her life. So I guess I tried to... symbolically finish it on her behalf? Who knows.

18. Fever Dream by Samanta Schweblin (5/5)

No idea how to describe this one, so I'm just screenshot-ing the first page:

Why I read it: an @a-rhombus recommendation.

19. The Merry Spinster by Daniel Lavery [reread] (5/5)

Extremely effective horror retellings of fairy tales. Impossible to pick a favorite.

Why I (re)read it: because I read a bunch of other good horror fiction this year (not my usual genre) and it reminded me how much I love this collection.

20. The Mask of Apollo by Mary Renault (5/5)

Set during a failed attempt to make Plato's Republic a reality (a historical event I somehow didn't know about but that is Highly Relevant to my interests), told from the perspective of an artist (the most interesting viewpoint Renault could have chosen). The descriptions of places made me desperately want to hike across Greece when I get the chance.

Why I read it: @catilinas posted an excerpt that compelled me.

21. The Once and Future Sex by Eleanor Janega (3/5)

Spends a lot of time proving a thesis about modern women I basically already agree with when what I really wanted was more historical details. My fault for not taking the blurb at its word.

Why I read it: a friend I play D&D with recommended it.

22. The Tombs of Atuan by Ursula K Le Guin (6/5)

Ok it's almost midnight and I don't want to fuck up one of my New Year's resolutions (10 minutes of yoga/day) when I'm only three days into the year. Real summary coming soon (hopefully. maybe).

Why I read it: one of my favorite worldbuilding youtube channels mentioned it was in her top 5 books.

23. Borne by Jeff VanderMeer (3/5)

The thing about giant flying bears is that they're just kinda silly.

Why I read it: the Southern Reach Trilogy was so good.

24. Some Desperate Glory by Emily Tesh (4/5)

Very strong start -- strong enough for the four-star rating -- but the final act pulls way too many punches.

Why I read it: I heard emilyenrose was publishing original fiction.

#xor reads