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#principal
one-time-i-dreamt · 5 months
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My principal banned Weezer from my school, so everyone turned the school into the Weezer Blue album. Little did we know that he was actually banning Weezer, the 120th element on the periodic table, and didn’t care about the band.
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drchickensv · 12 days
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"Don't eat all the cheese in the hallway"
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"...uhm, hi." *Principal is just kinda standing there, levitating.*
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who are you exactly???
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wgm-beautiful-world · 3 months
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Escadaria principal do Palácio Burnay em Lisboa, PORTUGAL
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bluesest · 3 months
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A Teachers´ Meeting
Nick was a boy who loved sports, well-built and an essential member of his high school football team. He was known for his athletic skills as well as his poor performance in other basic subjects like chemistry, mathematics, and others. However, he didn't care about this at all.
Mr. Collins was the gym teacher and the football team manager and coach. He was muscular, had a chiseled chin, and always wore tight clothes. He was aware of Nick's behavior, both in academics and on the field. Nick played aggressively against his opponents, even against his own teammates during practice. He followed one rule: "Go all out, no matter the opponent."
One day during practice, as always, Nick was on the offensive. While he had the ball, one of his teammates (from the opposing team) snatched it from him, causing Nick to explode in anger and kick his teammate in the legs. This was a violation of sportsmanship, and he was reluctantly removed from practice and scolded.
Nick was quite angry with the coach. He retorted, "It was his fault for being so weak and taking away the stupid ball."
Mr. Collins didn't like these words, so he told Nick to leave the field until he calmed down, and the conversation would continue the next day.
Later that day, there was a teacher's meeting where Nick's situation was discussed:
"He's very unruly."
"He doesn't even try to solve any equations."
"He's rude and very angry with all his classmates."
These were the kinds of comments heard about Nick. The coach agreed with the teachers' complaints. Before suggesting any punishment for Nick, the principal, Mr. Matthew, intervened.
Mr. Matthew: "We know that nothing we do works to help the boy. However, I think I have an idea... You see, next month is the intercollegiate football competition, where teams from different institutions participate every year. So, what if we suspend him from the team until the competitions are over?"
No teacher wanted to say anything at that moment. Perhaps it was a somewhat severe punishment, but Mr. Collins took the initiative and gave his full support to the principal. Then, all the teachers in the meeting gave their approval, and that's how it all began.
The next day, Nick was called to the principal's office, where Mr. Collins and Mr. Matthew awaited with the news.
Mr. Matthew: "I recently received complaints from several teachers about your grades."
Nick: "I admit I'm not a fan of letters and numbers, but that shouldn't concern you because, in the end, those grades only affect me. And if it bothers you so much, just change them."
Mr. Collins: "But we do care about your unsportsmanlike behavior."
Nick: "Coach, with all due respect, I think what I did showed who should be expelled from the team – the weak ones who can't withstand us only slow us down."
Mr. Collins: "And that's exactly what we're going to do, expel the weak ones."
Nick: "Finally understood..."
Mr. Matthew: "Your coach and I have reached a conclusion. I suppose you're aware of the upcoming intercollegiate football tournament. That's why we want to ensure our victory by temporarily suspending you from the team until the tournament is over."
Nick: "But what?! I'm one of the best players on the team!"
Mr. Collins: "Skill isn't everything in the game; teamwork is the most important, a concept you fail to understand."
Nick: "Bu- Bu- But-"
Mr. Matthew: "That's enough; go back to your classroom."
This was a total humiliation for Nick – being expelled during the best part of the school year, his chance to be a star snatched away by his own coach and the annoying principal. This wouldn't stand for Nick.
Nick returned home furious. He couldn't believe he was expelled. This required a prank, not just any prank, but one that would humiliate and ruin the careers of both. But what?
While thinking, Nick turned on the TV for inspiration and found it – a commercial for an extremely strong laxative powder. It was perfect for his revenge.
He went to the pharmacy and bought 10 packets of the laxative, which came with a warning: "effect in less than 30 minutes, do not take during busy hours, effects last 7 hours with effective and efficient intestinal cleansing."
Nick pondered if one small packet caused all that, imagine 5 of those in a person. Now Nick had to find a way to trick his victims into consuming the laxative.
The next day, one of his teammates told him that Mr. Collins had mentioned a meeting with directors and teachers from participating institutions to discuss essential matters for the competition. This was Nick's opportunity.
When no one was looking, he opened the teachers' lounge door. How? By secretly stealing the math teacher's keychain.
Inside, he saw the teachers' coffee maker, and when no one was looking, he made two large cups of coffee with lots of sugar to mask the taste of the laxative powder. In each cup, he used 5 laxative packets and placed a note with the respective names of his victims: "For Mr. Collins" and "For Mr. Matthew." The preparations were complete; now, he just had to wait.
Five minutes after Nick escaped the scene, Mr. Matthew and Mr. Collins entered the teachers' lounge:
Mr. Collins: "We have 10 minutes before the meeting; I think there's time for a cup of... Coffee?"
Both were surprised to see two hot cups of coffee with notes bearing their names. They wondered who could have done this.
Mr. Matthew: "I have no idea who might have made this gesture, but it would be rude not to thank them and enjoy a good coffee."
Mr. Collins: "I agree!"
They both took a big sip of the coffee, enjoying every second of the sweetness until, without realizing it, they drank it all.
"That cup of coffee was excellent," they thought, but they wouldn't anticipate what would happen next.
Both went to the bathroom to wash their hands and freshen up for the meeting. While Mr. Collins was combing his hair, a strange sensation began in his stomach – a kind of pressure in his intestines.
Mr. Matthew: "Is everything okay, colleague?"
Mr. Collins: "No, nothing, better wait for me outside."
Mr. Matthew: "Why?"
Mr. Collins: "Well... so we save time by not leaving one by one through the door."
Mr. Matthew: "Mmmmm... alright, I guess."
Finally, the principal came out of the bathroom and waited for his colleague. It was a lousy excuse, but the pressure was intense. Mr. Collins held his stomach tightly and released a putrid gas: *PPPPPPPPPPFFFFFFFFTTTTTT*
"Oh, crap," said Mr. Collins, hoping it wouldn't happen again.
Meanwhile, Mr. Matthew was outside lost in his thoughts when a pain in his stomach stopped him, and without thinking, he let out a violent fart: *PPPFFFFFFTTTTT* *PPPFFFTTTTTTTTT* *PFFTTTT*
"Oh no! I think I had too much coffee, hahaha." Another discomfort interrupted his laughter, making him clutch his stomach tightly. "I shouldn't have had coffee; it always gives me gas, and then... oh no... well, I guess there'll be time for everything once the meeting is over."
At that moment, Mr. Colins came out of the bathroom, noticing the smell in the air. Embarrassed that it was his, he simply waited, hoping Mr. Matthew hadn't noticed the smell.
Both were visibly uncomfortable, not knowing what was happening to them. In the blink of an eye, they were in the meeting with 20 other directors and teachers from other institutions.
This year, the responsibility for organizing the competition fell into the hands of Mr. Matthew and Mr. Colins (which is why the meeting was held at their institution).
For both of them, the meeting was the same every year: which rules to follow, which institutions would lend their fields, how much money needs to be collected, etc. The meetings were more for formality than anything else.
Mr. Matthew had the responsibility of leading the meeting, and with the growing pain in his stomach, he tried to make it more enjoyable and faster, but it didn't work.
Meanwhile, Mr. Colins was sitting when another discomfort hit him: *BRBRBRBRBRBR*; that sound was his stomach asking for relief, and he complied. He didn't release gas from his anal tract, but rather, through his throat.
His burp was stealthy enough not to alert anyone, so he continued: *BURP*. With each one, his mouth became more acidic, not enough to keep his stomach at bay.
Meanwhile, Mr. Matthew continued talking until a peculiar sound stopped him: *BRBRBRBRBRRB*. It was loud enough to be heard by everyone present, and Mr. Matthew pretended that nothing happened and continued talking:
Mr. Matthew: "The fee must be *BRBRBR* fair for all *BRBR* institutions."
Mr. Matthew knew he wouldn't be able to keep his stomach at peace for much longer, so he applied an old trick: *COUGH* *COUGH* *PPFFFFTT* *COUGH*.
The fart was brief enough not to be heard by anyone in the meeting, while the fart was even more pungent than the one from the door. However, he was far enough from the others so that it wouldn't be smelled.
Sweat was soaking him; slowly, his condition was worsening: *BBRRRRRRR*; he couldn't believe this was happening now. Having a diarrhea attack because of a disgusting coffee. In his thoughts, he said to himself: "I'll find out who did it and fire them!"
The situation wasn't different for Mr. Colins. He felt a great rush of air and liquid hitting his rectal walls, waiting for a moment to escape. He couldn't hold on anymore and thought: "My stomach hurts a lot; that coffee was definitely not a good idea."
*BRRRRRRRRRRRRR*
"Please, please, I need to hold on... more!"
*BRBRRRRRR* *BRRRRRRRR*
"I can't hold this anymore..."
*PPPPFFFFFTTT*
Everyone in that moment fell silent, noticing the unmistakable sound of trapped gas escaping. The smell was the classic coffee scent with a more sour and disgusting tone. Everyone instinctively looked at each other to see who did it, while the teachers sitting near Mr. Colins knew perfectly well who it was and had front-row seats for the terrible smell emanating from him.
"Oh shit, they surely know who it was... ohhhhh no, not again..."
*BRRRRRRRRRRRRRBRRRRBRBRBRBR*
"Please, please, please..."
*PPPPPFFFFFFFTTTTTTT* *PFFFFFTTTTT* *PPPPPPPPFFFFFFFTT*
*BRRRRRRRR*
His colleagues made a disgusted face, confirming their suspicions, and were disgusted by the new addition to the smell, a more penetrating odor, only caused by one thing: diarrhea.
Mr. Colins had a red face from embarrassment and a terrible pain in his stomach. He noticed something warm in his sweaty tight white underwear, caressing his crotch, finally, his body couldn't hold back, and he made the decision to release the pressure by giving way to some of the accumulated diarrhea.
"I think... I'm... CRAPPING!"
At that moment, he remembered the previous meetings, and one of the rules was "only one member is allowed to be absent at a time." He stood up from his seat, and with all eyes on him, even Mr. Matthew's, he said, "I need to step out for a moment... I left something in the car, I'll be right back." He walked towards the door, and when he left, he closed it forcefully and ran as fast as possible.
There were small laughs in the room; others had a disgusted and disapproving face, causing Mr. Matthew's stomach to stress again: *BRBRBBRRBRBRRR*. Taking advantage of his colleague's escape, he said, "I must go with him to see what's happening," but a thick and authoritative voice stopped him: "He'll be fine; you must continue with all of this." The voice was that of the Superintendent, who visibly was angry with everything that happened, and continued, "Besides, you must be aware that only one participant's absence is allowed at a time."
Mr. Matthew couldn't do anything but obey his superior, as he was responsible for financing all the present institutions and the main donor for the intercollegiate games.
He continued presenting the meeting points, but slowly his mind was clouding due to the incredible pain and pressure in his stomach. He could endure more than his colleague, Mr. Colins, because he usually drank coffee, and his stomach always expelled everything with diarrhea, but in a couple of hours, enough to get home. But this time was different; it had only been 20 minutes since they had the coffee, and Mr. Matthew was about to soil his pants without the possibility of Mr. Colins returning.
All he could do was wait and endure long enough while continuing to release pressure with gases that became more noticeable, both in noise and smell.
Mr. Matthew: "The next point will be the score topic; we will use the official system, and... *BBRRRRR* oh no... *BRRRRRRRR*"
*PFFFTTTT*
Mr. Matthew's mind: "I can't continue with this... *PPFFFFTTT* no, no, calm down, everything will be fine... come on, Colins, hurry up."
While all this was happening, Mr. Colins ran through the halls.
"Shit, shit, shit!"
*PFFFFFFFTTTTTTTT* *PPPPPFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTT*
"Get out of my way!"
His anus was pouring out the hot brown liquid he had been trying to avoid for the last 20 minutes. His underwear became heavier with each step, and from a distance, a large bump could be seen in his pants.
His diarrhea showed no mercy: *BRRRRRR* *PPPPFFFFFTTTT* *PSPSPSPPSPSPSPS* *BRRRRRRRRRR*. He was completely embarrassed, passing through several school corridors emitting a terrible stench. The coffee aroma could no longer be distinguished from the gases; rather, it seemed like a mixture of the meals the teacher had in the past few days: eggs, bacon, beer, chicken, Chinese sauce, juice, etc. A combination that supported the reason why the director could endure a little longer.
He reached the teachers' bathroom, but there was a problem: "The keys... I left them in my car! Aaaaaggghhhhhh *PPPPPFFFFFFFTTTTT* *PPPFFFFTTTTT*, shit, no time."
Desperate, he turned and ran towards the student bathroom. Each step meant taking the risk of ruining not only his underwear but also his pants and his teacher reputation.
*PPFFFFTT* *PPFFFFFTTT*
*PSPSPSPSPPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPS*
*PPPFFFFTTT* *BRBRBRRB*
"I need to get there!"
With a kick, he opened the door to the male bathroom. One of Mr. Colins's team members was inside: "Hello, coach! Didn't you have a meeting?" Mr. Colins didn't care and shouted at him, "Move and get out of here!" Scared, the boy ran out. The teacher forcefully closed the main door and blocked it with a mop nearby. He opened the stall door with force, desperately lowered his tight pants, and finally dropped his heavy underwear full of a large pile of smelly brown paste.
He sat his large, stained buttocks on the cold porcelain and closed his eyes...
*PPPPPPPFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTT*
*SQQLSKSKSDJSDSJJSSKSJSKSSIS* *PPPFFFTTT* *QSSGQHSSHQHSHQHSHQHSSSHHHHHH* *PFFFFFFFTTTTTTT* *PFFFFFFTTTT*
*BRBBRBRBRBRBRBR*
"Oh shit. Finally... Woohoo, hahaha!"
*BBBRRRRRRRBBBRRRRRRR*
"Oh, so you're coming for more, huh?"
*PFFTT* *BBBBRBRRRRRRBBBBRRRRRRR*
"And... it looks like... *BRRRRRR*... you're teaming up with the beer..."
*PFPFPFPFPPFPFTTTTTTTT* *SQHSQHHSSHQHSHQSHSQHQSH*
PPPPFFFFFTTTTTTFTFTFTF* *BRRRRRR* *SQHQSHHQHSS* *BRRRRRR*
*PLOP* *PLOP* *PFFFFFTTTTTTTT* *SQQQQQSSSHHHHHHHHHH* *BRRRRRBRRRR*
*Groans*
"I think I'm done... *BBRRRRR*... No, this is not going to end soon... *SQSQQSSQHHHH*."
Suddenly, the phone started ringing. It was Mr. Matthew:
Mr. Matthew: "Hey, how much longer are you going to take to come back?"
Mr. Colins: "Well... uh... I still haven't found what I lost in the car..."
Mr. Matthew: "How much more time do you need?"
Mr. Colins: "Give me about 5 minutes... *BRRRRRBRRBRBR*, oh better make it 10 more minutes... *PPPFFFFFTTTTTT* *QSQHSHQSHQHSHQSHQ*, better make it 30!"
Mr. Matthew: "What was that?"
Mr. Colins: "Nothing!"
Mr. Matthew: "I need you now, and... *PPPFFFFFFFTTTT*"
Mr. Colins: "What was that?"
Mr. Matthew: "Nothing!"
Mr. Matthew hung up the call at that moment and saw the superintendent's serious face. He was angry about the disaster that was the meeting presentation. But how could anyone concentrate while struggling not to have a leakage and soil their pants like a little child?
The Superintendent asked, "What's happening, Mr. Matthew? Whom were you calling?"
Mr. Matthew replied, "Sorry for the interruption, but my colleague needs help... *BBBRRRRRBBBRRRRRR* urgently..."
Superintendent: "So, do you plan to leave us sitting here waiting for him?"
Mr. Matthew: "Of course *BRBRBRBRBR* not..."
Superintendent: "Something is bothering you, isn't it?"
Mr. Matthew: "Of course not... *PPPPFFFFTTTT* oh..."
Superintendent: "Of course, it is. I order you to stop whatever is happening and proceed with this."
Mr. Matthew: "Bu- bu- but..."
Superintendent: "It's an order."
Mr. Matthew: "I..."
The room fell completely silent in the face of the boss's anger, watching the discomfort and sweat of their colleague who was in total suffering. They were surprised to see that Mr. Matthew obeyed the superintendent's words in a literal, desperate, and disgusting way...
*PFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT*
*QSQSHQSHSQHSHQHSQHSHSHQHSHQHS*
Superintendent: "BUT WHAT?"
Mr. Matthew: "OH YES, OH YES NGAAAAAGGGGHHH"
*PFFFFFTFTTTTTTT PPPPFFFFFTFFTTFTFTFTFTF*
*PSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPS* *BRRRRRRRRRRRBRRRRRRR*
*PFFFFFFTTTTTTTTTT*
Everyone in the room was stunned; they couldn't believe it. Mr. Matthew, with a satisfied face, said, "I'm just obeying you, sir..." then he lowered his ruined pants, revealing a mixture of brown soup with several solid parts, including his naked balls and buttocks. He then took the trash can and continued with his work:
*PPPPFFTFFFTFTTTTT* *QSHQSHSHQHSQHSHQHSHQ* *BRRRR* *PFFFFFFTTTTTGTTTTTT* *SPLASH* *PLOP* *PLOP* *PLOP* *PPFFFFTFTTFTFT*
The angry superintendent left the room along with all the other teachers, and in Mr. Matthew's mind, he said, "Well, it seems we won't be the organizers anymore..."
*PPPFFFFFFFFTTTTTTT* *PSPSPSPSPSPSPSPPSPSPS*
"OHHHHHHHHHHHHH"
20 minutes had passed; Mr. Colins entered the meeting room, and what he found surprised him: he saw his boss defecating in a trash can while on his right were the ruined and soiled pants.
Mr. Colins, in a sarcastic tone, said, "The coffee?"
Mr. Matthew: "The coffee."
*SPSPSPSPSPS* *QSHQHSHSHSQHSHSHQ*
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saywhat-politics · 3 months
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PERRY, Iowa (AP) — An Iowa principal critically injured in a school shooting put himself in harm’s way so students could try to escape from a teenage shooter who opened fire in a cafeteria as students were gathering for breakfast before class, authorities said Friday.
Perry High School Principal Dan Marburger and six others, including two staff members and four teenage students, were injured in the Thursday morning shooting that left one sixth-grader dead. The 17-year-old student who opened fire also died of an apparent self-inflicted gunshot.
The state Department of Public Safety said Marburger, who is being treated in a Des Moines hospital, “acted selflessly and placed himself in harm’s way in an apparent effort to protect his students.”
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starqueen87 · 7 months
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playtime-fuji6 · 5 months
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IF YOU MAKE ME MAD AGAIN…
DO YOU KNOW W̯ͤ̾ͣ͝Hͥ̽ͣ̃̔A̷͙ͭͫ̕T̨͈͗̌ͥ Ỵ̛̖͋͢O̖̼ͩ͌͐U̠҉̷̙ͦ’L̸̖̽̌͂L̸̖̽̌͂ Ḛͭ̉̇͟N̺̻̔̆ͅD̶͔̭̪̻ U̠҉̷̙ͦP̧͕̒̊͘ W̯ͤ̾ͣ͝I̍̅̀̎̊T̨͈͗̌ͥHͥ̽ͣ̃̔?
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star-flavored-ramen · 1 month
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Looking back, ever sense NULL disappeared, my mans been nothing but silly goofy and that’s all I can see him now
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geekynightowl1997 · 7 months
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Wait.
The Librarians are just teachers.
Jenkins- Principle
Flynn- English/ Drama
Eve- P.E.
Cassie- Math/ Science
Jacob- History/ Art
Ezekiel- Computer
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darkwitch1999 · 2 months
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Marc, Sweetie, I Just Want to Talk to Her...
(I just thought of this today when this family guy scene showed up in my recommendations on YouTube. So this is set when Marc's moms find out that Marc has been getting bullied at his old school for years and his teachers and principal turned a blind eye to his torment. Needless to say....they weren't happy. And well, Emerson wants to have a "talk" with Marc's principal.)
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(Emerson parks the family car in the school's parking lot. Emerson, Kiki, and Marc exit the vehicle. Emerson starts walking towards the trunk of the car and opens it up while her son follows her.)
Marc: (worried) Mama, please! Don't do this! Let's just go home!
Emerson: (pulls an aluminum bat out of the trunk) Marc, sweetie, I just want to talk to her.
Marc: (eyes grow wide with panic) W-Wait...why do you have your bat?! M-Mama?!
Emerson: I just wanna talk to her.
Marc: Wait, Mama, what are you doing?!
(Emerson starts walking towards the school building with a stoic look on her face. Marc follows his mama with increasing worry and fear. Kiki also follows her wife and son into the building with a shit-eating grin spread across her face.)
Emerson: I just wanna talk to her.
Marc: (pleading) Mama! This is crazy!
Emerson: I just wanna talk to her. Marc, sweetie, I just want to talk to her.
(The Anciel family enters the school building. As they walk through the empty school halls, Marc continues to plead with his mama to stop.)
Marc: Mama, put the bat down!
Emerson: I just wanna talk to her.
Marc: (turns to Kiki) Mom! You can't let Mama do this! Please, can't you stop her?!
Kiki: (smirking) Marc, sweetie. Mama just wants to talk to her.
Emerson: I just wanna talk to her.
(The family is getting closer to Prinicipal Clément's office.)
Marc: (desperately pleads) Mama, please stop! I get that your mad at her, but she's not worth it!
Emerson: I just wanna talk to her.
(The Anciel trio stops at the office door.)
Emerson: (readies her bat) I just want to beat her ass.
Marc: No, stop! Please don't hurt her!
Emerson: I just want to beat her ass.
(Emerson then kicks the door open, startling Principal Clément and causing her to jump up from her desk chair. Emerson then storms in and strikes her bat into the principal's desk, creating a very large dent from the impact. The principal looked at the angry mother with absolute fear in her eyes as Emerson's stoic demeanor turned into one of sheer lividness.)
Emerson: (shouts) EXPLAIN YOURSELF, KNAVE!!!!!!!
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Well, there you have it. And yes, that last line was from a line used in a video from "Let Me Explain Studios" on YouTube. If you have never seen Rebecca's videos, I highly suggest giving them a watch. Her videos are amazing!
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I don't think Marc's mama, Emerson Anciel, would have done exactly that in my fanfiction series, but the vibe would be the same. Also, this isn't the first time that Emerson has pulled out her bat to threaten people. It's her weapon of choice whenever she needs to beat the crap out of some asshole. Anyway, what do you all think? Hope you enjoyed this little parody and feel free to share your thoughts.
@nerd-chocolate @artzychic27 @andromeda612 @princessbutterflysposts @imsparky2002
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one-time-i-dreamt · 4 months
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I befriended a boy who had to do a magic trick in front of my principal who was also queen Victoria to not be executed. For that trick he needed the permission of a ghost, so I turned into one because apparently that's what I do. Anyways, he did the trick and was allowed to live. Then he gave me a high five and queen Victoria ordered cake.
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drchickensv · 23 days
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wiirocku · 9 months
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Proverbs 4:7 (NKJV) - Wisdom is the principal thing; Therefore get wisdom. And in all your getting, get understanding.
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saywhat-politics · 3 months
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"Our entire state is devastated," the governor said.
The Iowa high school principal who was shot and wounded while trying to protect his students during a school shooting earlier this month has died from his injuries, according to the school district.
Perry High School Principal Dan Marburger was among seven people injured in the Jan. 4 shooting. One student, 11-year-old sixth grader Ahmir Jolliff, was killed, authorities said.
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Tw gore ⚠️ fake scenario
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{ I have already post on Twitter but I forgot to post it here. Anywho, enjoy the angst.
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